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flanaganfilm · 1 year

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Good day Mr Flanagan. please what does "the rest is confetti" mean to you and in the context it was used in hill house??

Okay, here we go. Buckle up for a long read.

To answer this, I've got to explain a little bit about what was happening and where I was when I sat down to write episode 10 of The Haunting of Hill House.

Hill House was not a fun shoot. The picture above is from very early in production, when I was still chubby and happy.

It was my first foray into television. I was absolutely terrified that I'd mess it up. So I'd opted to direct all of the episodes myself, figuring that - if nothing else - I'd have no one else to blame if it went south.

It was the most grueling professional experience of my career. The shoot was by no means a smooth one, every day was an uphill battle from a budgetary perspective, and between the three giant production entities involved with the production, I spent a lot of time fighting over the creative and logistical elements of the series.

I began losing weight. I was smoking two packs of cigarettes a day.

By the end of the shoot, I had dropped almost 40 lbs.

I was very depressed. Every day was a battle, and for the first time in my career, I wasn't excited to go to work in the morning. We were fighting for basic resources, fighting for the show we wanted, and even fighting amongst ourselves by the end. It was grueling.

We hadn't written all of the scripts when we started production. I believe we had finished through episode 7, but the rest of the scripts had to be finished while we were already shooting.

We'd mapped everything out in the writers room, and I had great support on the other episodes, but I was writing the finale solo. I'd thought I'd be able to juggle it with everything else. I quickly fell behind.

I finally got to the script about halfway through production. I'd work on it between takes at the monitor, and then get home to our tiny rental house in Atlanta, where Kate was waiting with our baby son. (One of the rare bright spots of this shoot came when Kate found out she was pregnant about halfway through production. We even named our daughter Theodora, in honor of her origins.)

I'd typically fall down from exhaustion when I got home, but I had to push through it and work on the script. My weekends were spent shotlisting and prepping for upcoming episodes. We didn't have enough time to stay ahead of prep, so every available day was used for that... I went three months without a single day off at one point.

I'd sit up late staring at the script. I was in a dark, dark place. Overwhelmed, exhausted, and feeling like I lived in an eternal present. Each day bled into the next and it didn't feel like there was an end in sight. That feeling of unreality was heightened because we kept returning to the same sets, same locations, and even the same scenes throughout the 100 shooting-day production. Stepping back into the exact room we had shot in days or weeks or even months ago made the whole thing feel absolutely surreal. Making movies is always an non-linear experience, but this one felt particularly so... it was like the days of our lives were happening to us all out of order.

I remember feeling something like despair creeping into my daily experience on the show. And I remember dwelling on that when I got into the scene work of episode 10.

As I worked through the draft, I recall that despair coloring a lot of what was on the page. My filter was breaking down. There's a monologue at the beginning of the episode where Steven's wife Leigh (played by my dear friend Samantha Sloyan) spews out a torrent of eviscerating insults about Steve's value as a writer. That is just me vomiting onto myself. She was voicing all of my deepest insecurities about myself at the time, and of what I was doing with this series.

She says "Is anything real before you write it, Steve? The things you write about, they're real. Those people are real, their feelings are real, their pain is real - but not to you, is it. Not until you chew it up, digest it, and shit it out onto a piece of paper and even then, it's a pale imitation at best."

This was the mindset I was in for a lot of the shoot. The writing became a reflection of a lot of that turmoil, and I knew who I was referring to in that monologue - I was talking about my family. I was talking about how much of their lives I'd used as building material for this show. I was talking about the fact that I'd lost two loved ones to suicide, and seen what it had done to my mother in particular. And I knew I was using - possibly even exploiting - those people for this series.

There's a lot of despair in this episode. The Red Room, as we conceived it, was a place that would feed upon those emotions. Grief, sadness, loss... those were the real ghosts of our series, and where our characters find themselves at the start of the finale. They're being slowly digested - eaten alive - by those feelings.

So finally, it came time to write Nell's final scene with her siblings. I knew from the outline we'd constructed in the writers room what this was supposed to accomplish - she was supposed to be their salvation. She was supposed to take all of these feelings that we'd been wrestling with and finally provide catharsis... finally say something that would free everyone.

I remember sitting with a blinking cursor for a long time. The Crain siblings had just turned and seen Nellie standing by the door, and suddenly were able to hear her speak. But what should she say? What would I say? What would I want someone to say to me?

What she ultimately says lays bare a lot of what I was thinking about when it comes to grief. It exists outside of linear time, much as I felt I existed at the time. That sense of eternal present, that sense of a nonlinear eternity of moments and memories - it all came out in her speech to her brothers and sisters.

I remember feeling, looking at my insane present and looking back at my past, how strangely overwhelmed I was by memories. That I wasn't experiencing time in a straight line, and hadn't been for a while - for the better part of a year, I'd felt more like I was standing in a whirlwind of moments. "Our moments fall around us like..." Nell said, and I recall sitting back and trying to find the words.

"Rain," for certain, but there was something too uniform about that. The moments of life as I experienced them weren't that orderly, they weren't that small. They didn't fall the same way. Some sailed by, fast and unremarkable, while others lingered in front of me, twisting and stretching. So it was a good word, but not the right word. I left it on the page though.

"Snow" was my next attempt. Better, in that I imagined the snow blowing in the wind, swirling and dancing and feeling more organic. More chaotic. More like life. But for some reason, the word that stuck with me, the word I felt Nell Crain would connect with was...

"Confetti."

And that was because I was thinking not of Victoria Pedretti at this point, but of Violet McGraw.

Violet played Young Nell, and I wondered what she might have said if she experienced time this way. As an adult, Nell was despairing. Nell was overwhelmed. But as a child... there was an innocence to the word. There was a joy to the word.

I imagined moments falling around her, this little girl with the big smile and the wide eyes. Her moments would be colorful. They would be of different shapes and sizes, some falling fast and some falling slow, flipping and turning and dancing in the air, independent of the others. Sparkling, whirling, doing lazy summersaults as they sauntered down to Earth.

I thought of myself, and of the members of my family. I thought of those we'd lost. I realized what I hoped for them, and for us all, in the end... was to look upon that mosaic of experience, that avalanche of days and minutes and moments... and to smile with some of the joy we had as children.

And this, I thought, was something that gave me hope. This gave me a glimpse of some kind of salvation for them. This was also how I hoped my life might seem if I was a ghost - a cascade of color and light and shape and movement, something I could dance in.

So Nell smiled and said... "or confetti."

It stuck with me. The rest of her monologue gets heavy again, and gets to the real point of the show - the point of the whole series, if I'm honest - and that's forgiveness.

I figured the only thing that would let the Crain children out of the Red Room was to be forgiven. I thought of the losses in my own family, and I thought of what I wished for my mother and for my aunts and uncles and cousins and I tried to pour that into her final words.

"I loved you completely, and you loved me the same," she said, "that's all." And this was the point I wanted the most to make. That at the end of our life, if we can say this about each other, the rest doesn't matter. The rest is that rainstorm, or that blizzard, that fell around this one central truth, and maybe built itself in piles around it, to the point we lost sight of it along the way.

And I thought again of that little girl, and almost as an afterthought, wrote "The rest is confetti."

I liked the way it sounded, but I was insecure about the line. I almost took it out, in fact. I remember asking Kate to read the scene and talking about that last line with her. "Is it too cute?" I wondered. She was on the fence. "Depends on how it's acted," she said, and I figured she was right. We could always take it out if it didn't work. The scene could end with "I loved you completely, and you loved me the same. That's all."

Why not shoot it and see what happened.

I turned in the script, we published it quickly so that we could start breaking it down and prepping it. And the next morning I was back on set. I'd deal with episode 10 when it came down the pipe again, sometime in the coming months. We had a lot of shooting to get through before I had to worry about it.

I recall Netflix asking me to cut a lot of that monologue, and I remember them also having questions about the "confetti" line. I pointed out that it didn't cost us any extra to shoot it all, it was only words, and fought to keep the script intact.

Ultimately, they insisted I make a series of cuts on the page. I begrudgingly agreed, but left Nell's speech alone. I made superficial cuts around it, throughout the draft, and even considered changing the font size to fool them into thinking it had gotten shorter (I ultimately was told I wouldn't fool anyone and not to risk starting a war). But Nellie's final goodbye stayed intact.

It must be said - Victoria Pedretti SLAUGHTERED this scene.

By the time we got around to filming it, things had never been worse for the production. There was almost nothing left for a lot of us. Tensions were sky-high, resources had been exhausted completely, and we were all ready to give up.

Filming in the mold-ridden Red Room was depressing, morose, and led to a lot of arguments and unpleasantness. The room itself just felt gross, always, and we were in there for days at a time. The last thing we had to shoot in there was Nellie's goodbye.

Victoria came to set having to push through pages of monologue, and she did so with captivating bravado. I recall being teary-eyed at the monitor watching her work. And when we finally made it to the last line, I watched her deliver it with... a smile. A sincere, innocent, longing, joyful smile. A smile informed by the sadness, grief, and loss of her own situation, of her own life... but a smile that finds forgiveness and grace after all. Pedretti knew how to say the line, and how that word would work.

And as she said it, I knew it would stay in the show.

Over the years, that sentence has become something of a tagline for The Haunting of Hill House. I'm always a bit mystified and touched when I see people approach me with the line on T-shirts, or even tattooed on their bodies.

I started signing it with autographs back in 2020 after enough fans asked me to. Now it's my go-to when I sign anything related to Hill House.

The line, for me, represents a lot of things.

It's about the insane, chaotic, non-linear experience of making that show. It's about trying to find and hold onto joy, even in the grips of despair.

It's about the way the moments of our lives aren't linear, not really, and how we may be unable to understand them as we exist in their flurry. It's about finding hope, innocence and forgiveness in the final reckoning.

And it's about how, outside of our love for each other, the rest is just... well, it's fleeting. It's colorful. It's overwhelming. It's blinding. It's dancing. And, if we look at it right, it's beautiful. But it's also light. It's tinsel. It flits and dances and falls and fades, it's as light as air.

The rest is the stuff that falls around us, and flits away into nothing.

It's the love that stays.

#haunting of hill house #the rest is confetti #that was a very long story #man I was not okay while we were shooting that #forgiveness #heal

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mrswint3rs · 3 months

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Can you do a Zeke one?

𝐌𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐲 ᯐ

pairings- Professor! Zeke x Fem! Reader

a/n- i love this man with all my heart // not proofreading bc if i do i’ll cringe and delete the whole thing

cw- Teacher x Student relations, fantasizing, some mentions of guilt, public masturbation, age gap (reader is early 20s / Zeke is mid 40s), unprotected sex, use of praise as always ❦

➽────── ──────

In all his years of teaching, he’d never had a student quite like you. Never had he even considered looking at one of his students as anything more. Then you came along. Or rather, he did.

It was good to start a clean slate every now and then, to get a chance at doing something new. So he decided to take a sabbatical leave, temporarily parting from his home country.

It wasn’t the first time he had traveled to the states, but teaching there was a different story.

Seemed phyc was a more common course to take for a GPA raise rather than it was important. Most students didn’t take his teachings all that seriously, handing in the most atrocious attempts at an essay.

No one engaged in his lectures, even when he made an effort to make them more interesting and interactive. They all just lifelessly sat through each day, like his words went in one ear and right out the other.

Only you seemed to be interested in actually learning, laughed at his dry humored jokes when none of your other peers did. It was his only motivation to get through each day. He considered going back to his roots. It all felt sort of pointless, like he wasn’t getting through to anyone.

Sure his lessons and theories were a little old fashioned and boring at times, but he didn’t think he was all that bad. It was what he worked so hard through his youth for. He was pretty confident in all his knowledge and wanted nothing more than to provide his insight which you finally gave him a chance at.

You never skipped class, always turned in assignments on time, and you actually participated. Every question you’d be the first to raise your hand, most times you’d be the only one to do so. You even went out of your way to speak with him after class ended, either questions about the lecture or just to talk to him in general.

He knew he shouldn’t favor his students, but really he couldn’t help it.

You put so much effort into studying, and it showed in all your test results. Exams were a breeze for you because you actually heard him when he spoke. Always front row.

He looked forward to seeing you there, probably more than he should. And he absolutely despised seeing you talking to your other teachers. He could only hope he was your favorite.

It was that jealous build up that made him realize just how much you started to cloud his thoughts.

He started to favor you so much he could hardly see your faults. Any mistakes on your papers, he’d ignore, just to see you beam at his approval when it was handed back. Not that he needed any excuse to praise you, you were without a doubt at the top of your class even without his foul play.

In no way did you try to provoke him. You were a humble girl, just trying to get your credits. Yet he couldn’t help but wish it was something more than that.

The way you looked at him, as if waiting for something. He couldn’t resist the feeling of wanting you. And that want was gradually shifting into a need. No woman in his age group ever got him that needy. Only you and your possibly yearning gaze.

He grips his cock, stroking to the thought of you like a mad man after class. Nobody came into his office after lunch hours anyway.

He cusps his freehand over his mouth to silence his pathetic groaning as he fucks into his other one, closing his eyes tight and imagining you at the front of his class. Just sitting and listening to him so intently. You were so innocently enticing.

Just the thought of you doing something so normal was enough to make him lose himself.

It was so morally wrong and he knew that deep down. It only made it feel more thrilling, making him shoot spurts all over the underside of his desk.

God, he was a sick man. Completely thinking with his dick as if he was a teenaged boy again. He felt like he needed to be baptized or something.

But even with the aftermath guilt, his need for you was unwavering. He just didn’t know how to get closer to you. You probably didn’t see him that way. He didn’t think he fit the role of the ‘sexy professor’ that all the girls fawned over. He was just a dorky middle aged man trying to be what his parents wanted him to be. It was more than likely that you only saw him for what he was.

It was normal to have at least one teachers pet. You just tried harder than most to be successful. If you want something, you have to earn it.

You knew that all too well. Which was the real reason behind your commitment to his class.

Sure, you needed those credits and a straight grade, but those weren’t your main concerns. The second you stepped foot in that room and laid eyes on him, he became the whole focus point. He was beautiful and not in a self absorbed way, which was so rare. It was like he didn’t even realize how appealing he was, and you wanted nothing more than to show him.

Anyone could take notice of how awkward his lectures were. When he tried to interact and joke around and they were all so blandly silent. You felt bad.

Soon, you started putting yourself in front of him as much as you possibly could, becoming one of the only ones to make an effort to engage with the poor man. It was clear he was trying his best.

And he was an excellent instructor. You weren’t all brains, and his lectures made more sense than any of the previous. To you, everything he taught just clicked. You were fascinated by his witt, even his profound opinions. It was the only class you didn’t feel obligated to attend.

At first he was just eye candy. But over time you grew to actually appreciate his unique personality as well. He wore his heart on his sleeve more than he probably realized. You could read him like an open book. And it was especially clear how he felt in the way he looked at you, and that lopsided greeting smile when you looked back.

He seemed so happy every time you’d approach him after class. It was clear he was lonely. No one appreciated him the way you did, and you couldn’t understand why. It was beyond pity. You just wanted to see those blue-grey eyes light up, and for his smile to actually reach them.

And him in general.

You could hardly sit still at the sound of his voice going on about the ‘hierarchy of needs’. Well he was leaving out a major one.

You clench your thighs together tighly, shifting like you’re uncomfortable just for the friction from the seem in the crotch of your jeans, gnawing on your inner cheek like a dog with a bone. The last thing you wanted was to let a moan slip in front of everyone. Even you realize how desperate you were behaving. The man was just talking for fucks sake.

It was always so easy for you to take it in before, but now you’re not following what he’s teaching at all, only focusing on the rasp undertone of his voice. Imagining how it’d sound if he was buried deep inside you.

You orgasm so easily, making a mess inside your pants. You just hoped no one took notice of your writhing, and that he wasn’t looking at the way your eyes rolled back as you came so hard to the thought of him. Though a part of you wanted him to catch on.

Eventually your lack of ability to pay attention caught up to you. Your grades started to slip, which shocked him since you were doing so well before. He couldn’t help but feel concerned and he wanted to know the cause of the change. Which led you to being called into his office, with the door and blinds shut for privacy.

Where you always deep down aspired to be. Just preferably not for this reason. You never wanted to disappoint him.

“Have a seat wherever you’re comfortable,” he says, pulling up one of your recent works.

You pull out the chair in front of his desk, plopping down and looking everywhere but at him. Blatantly obvious you’re aware of the reason you were summoned.

“Forgive me for being vague in my email… I just wanted to check on you.” he says. “Lately you’ve been…sort of out of it. I just want to be sure you’re taking care of yourself.”

“No need to be concerned about me, Professor Yeager.” you immediately chime in. “I’ll pick up the slack.”

“I’m not as much worried about your grades as I am about you. You’re a very talented girl. I’d hate to see you struggle, especially on my account.”

“It’s not your fault,” yes it is. “You’re one of the greatest teachers i’ve ever had.”

And that’s one of the sweetest things he’s ever heard. He struggles to keep up his professional facade as those words come out of your mouth. Something he had wanted to receive throughout his whole career.

“Is that so?” he presses on. “Why is that? I fear i’m nothing short of the average.”

You breathe out, almost frustrated by his self undermining. “You’re anything but average, professor. In all aspects.”

You couldn’t be more obvious. The only way you were getting anywhere with him was by being flat out bold. Even if he turned you down, you couldn’t miss out on the chance to reveal yourself. It was nearing the end of his sabbatical leave. You knew he would only be there for one semester.

“In…all aspects?”

You wanted to curl up and die. You knew he was a bit of a loser, but thought surely he could take a hint. He had to have had a woman in his life at some point.

Instead of further delving into the details of feelings, you shoot your shot, leaning in to take his lips. No way to misinterpret that.

It finally clicks with him then. You wanted him all the same, came straight to him.

Next thing you know, you’re flat on your stomach, face smooshed against the smooth wood of his desk with his cock jabbing in and out of your drenched cunt. He didn’t have to restrain himself any longer, finally you were right where he wanted you to be. All those days of pumping into his hand were nothing compared to actually having you. Just as tight and eager as he imagined. He knew you were innocent on the outside, but nobody is ever fully innocent on the inside.

“Such a pretty girl,” he moans. “I’ve waited so long to have you like this.”

He hits that spot repeatedly, making you gasp for breaths. “s’ too good…” you mewl, your pussy practically swallowing him up whole.

“Thank you for being such a wonderful student,” he groans, hips stuttering as he feels you tighten around his length. “Taking me so damn good…”

“I’m so proud of you for how far you’ve come.” he adds, and you turn into a puddle. “All for me,”

He continues to rut into you, neither of you caring about the consequences. Your moans are so angelic to him. He wishes he could watch your face, look into your eyes while he fucks you. He just wants you to need him.

“Gonna cum, Professor!” you warn with a whine, only urging him to pick up the pace. He hooks his arm underneath you, rapidly rubbing your puffy clit to break you further.

“That’s it…” he pants. “Cum with me. All over my cock.”

“ Give it to me, please.”

You clamp down as you finally burst. The feeling takes you whole. Your mouth opens but no sound comes out. You feel your body tingling from head to toe as he fucks you through it, chasing his own release.

You’re put down to a breathless, whiny mess, unable to even see straight or think about anything but your teacher’s cock, stuffing you oh so full of his cum with no regard.

He keeps going until it’s overstimulating him. He didn’t want to part from you. Ever. But as it got to be too much, he forces himself to pull out, releasing a pitiful whimper at the separation.

But you looked so beautiful, sprawled out and twitching on his desk. He couldn’t control the hardening of his cock again. He needed a break, though he didn’t know how long he could last without your warmth again. He needed to have all of you for himself. He’d never be satisfied otherwise.

“Can you take me again?” he asks, not wanting to tire you out entirely. You still had class after this.

You babble out repetitive pleads for more in response and he has to grip his length to calm the throbbing. He couldn’t wait, even for five minutes. You had him completely addicted at the first taste.

“That’s my girl.”

mlist

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blessedwithabadomen · 2 months

Text

in love with the mess - day eight

summary : Aubrey is going on tour and, for once, she's decided to focus on having as much fun as possible. Oli can be a little shit but he does nothing short of adore Audrey and... well, maybe Noah a little, too. Noah likes the flirting, as long as no one gets too close, emotionally. But what will happen when the three of them take it too far?

content : smut (oral m & f receiving), angst, drinking, little bit of fluff

length : 5.6k

tags (let me know if you want to be tagged!) : @veronicaphoenix @cookiesupplier @lma1986 @jilliemiw86 @bngurngheart @lacktoesandtoddlerants @narcissisticbehavior81 @flowery-mess @shilohrosechicken @justeli6 @starvingarsyn @floatinglikeaswan @somebodyels3 @kageyasma @spikeisdaddy

a/n : It's @spikeisdaddy's birthday today! Hope you enjoy the chapter 😉

•••

day eight

We spent the night away from each other and even though we’d all just agreed to only focus on having some fun, it felt like the loneliest night yet. I found myself tossing and turning and reaching out for people who weren’t there. It seemed stupid, really. We’d only done the whole sleepover endeavour once, yet I missed it as if it was the norm. I was tired and restless when my alarm went off. At least today involved no travelling. As much as I enjoyed getting around, I needed a restful day.

If the universe decided to be gentle with me and allow me one.

I was in the middle of trying to decide whether I should call Lia or finally get back at my roommate and whatever bad news I assumed she had to tell me, when my phone displayed a new, private message from Noah.

Noah How did you realise you enjoyed giving blowjobs

I was still in shock at the words I was reading when another text came in.

Noah Okay maybe it was rude to assume you enjoyed giving blowjobs, dismiss that part Aubrey Noah, my love, I’m going to need a lot more context for this question Noah Absolutely not Aubrey Give me your room number, I’m coming over Noah Folio’s here Aubrey FINE come to mine then No more excuses

Noah, luckily, obliged. I didn’t have to kick Oli’s arse into gear for another two hours, really, so there was more than enough time to deal with whatever Noah needed to discuss. Not that I didn’t have an idea what was on his mind. But I wouldn’t let him off the hook so easily. He’d have to say it out loud to get any help from me.

When I opened the door to Noah, he was blushing deeper than I’d ever seen him and I couldn’t help pulling him down for a quick kiss just for the sheer adorableness. Then I pushed him into the room, walking him backwards until he sat down on the edge of my bed and mustered him from above.

“So?” I asked, eyebrows raised. “What possessed you to get up this morning and type that exact message into our chat?”

“Nothing, it was just a question!” Noah exclaimed as if I would believe it.

“Sure. You just happen to wonder, out of nowhere, about giving blowjobs.”

“What if I am?”

“You’re not though.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.”

He tried to look stern, but the lingering red colour on his cheeks didn’t do him any favours. We were at a stalemate, staring at each other, trying to force the other to budge through the sheer pressure of silence. But he had no idea how stubborn I could be.

He broke sooner than anticipated.

“Fine, Folio made a stupid comment about when I was going to suck Oli’s dick and then it wouldn’t leave my head.”

“Because you’re interested in it?” I asked, carefully, stroking his head as I stepped a little closer. He immediately spread his thighs so I could move between them, looking up at me with wide eyes.

“I don’t know,” he answered, honestly. I could see the torment in his eyes, the question of whether he dared to go further, of what he wanted, of what Oli would let him do.

“Well, I guess you won’t know unless you try. But…” I sank down on my knees in front of him. “I could always show you how it’s done, if you're nervous about that.”

Noah’s laboured breathing was answer enough and when my hands reached for his belt, he leaned back instinctively, giving me more space to work with. I made quick work of undoing his belt, opening the button and fly of his trousers. He willingly lifted his hips so I could push the fabric down, immediately removing his boxers along with it.

Noah was hard. My mouth salivated just from looking at it.

“Thinking about doing this to Oli got you all excited, hm? He’s gorgeous, you know. I got to see it once, up close, just as hard as you are now.” My hand softly grabbed onto his dick, giving him a few teasing strokes. He sighed in relief. “He came all over my chest. But you? You get to come in my mouth. If you want to.”

I fluttered my eyes at him. Noah couldn’t nod fast enough, holding eye contact with me as I lowered my head and gave him a long lick, tasting all of him from his base to his tip.

“You want to start slow, you know?” I mused, before repeating my action. “Tease him a little. Get him all hot and bothered.” My hand was moving when my tongue wasn’t on him. “See what he’s into.”

I let my tongue twirl around his head a little and then, almost unexpectedly, engulfed it in my mouth. Noah groaned beautifully, a hand now holding the back of my head, I wasn’t even sure if he was aware of it. I tasted the precum already dripping, savouring the slightly bitter taste just because it was him before moving away again.

“Putting your mouth on him is when it gets really good. Don’t aim for too much if you’re not used to it.” I took him a bit farther into my mouth, just for a moment, then I withdrew. “Try to figure out what he's into. I think Oli can be pretty loud so that wouldn’t be a problem.” I grinned up at him, but he didn’t manage to look back at me for long.

As soon as my mouth was on him again, he threw his head back, eyes closed in pleasure. It was straining to look up at him from my position but I couldn’t help trying to see every now and then, trying desperately to commit the image to mind.

Noah was turning into a moaning, trembling mess, quickly. I was rhythmically moving my mouth over his dick now, taking him as far as I comfortably could, my hand covering the rest of his length. He was heavy on my tongue, slightly thick, perfect. His hand was fully grasping my hair now, bordering on painful, but I enjoyed it all the same. I knew he was going to come soon.

Going a little faster still, working my mouth and hand in tandem, it didn’t take much more for him to fall apart. His deep groan vibrated somewhere deep inside me as he came, keeping me in place as I swallowed it all, just as I had promised.

When I finally pulled off, Noah bonelessly fell backwards, breathing hard and I had to chuckle at how my efforts had worked out.

“So, what do you say?” I asked, even though I was unsure he was hearing me just yet. “Want to give it a try? I could shoot Oli a text right now.”

I didn’t expect him to agree.

“Text him,” he murmured. “But stay.”

I wasn’t one to refuse. My underwear was already uncomfortably wet. Now I was getting to see Noah give Oli his first ever blowjob? It was going to be the most delicious torture.

Still, I crawled up onto the bed quickly, taking Noah’s face between my hands and making him look at me. His eyes were glazed, but his mind seemed clear.

“Sure?”

He pulled me down for a kiss, not caring where I’d literally just had my mouth.

“So sure.”

Aubrey Come over. Noah wants to blow you.

Noah had barely come back to life and managed to get properly dressed again when a knock sounded through the room. Of course, Oli would waste no time at all after getting that message. I opened the door to a very flustered and out-of-breath singer, even though the way from his room to mind hadn’t even been remotely long enough to get so worked up. Apparently the idea was more than appealing to him.

“Is this for real?” he asked the second he entered the room, moving past me just to check if Noah was really there. “Because if not I got a boner for nothing.”

I didn’t know what, exactly, I had been expecting. But it surely wasn’t Noah all but flying off the bed, pressing Oli against the wall and falling to his knees.

“Someone's eager,” Oli chuckled, lifting Noah's head with two fingers under his chin to force him to look at him. “Let's see what you got then.”

I found my place on the singular armchair in the room, right next to them, seating myself on the arm rest to assure I would have the best view of it all. Noah deftly pulled down Oli's sweatpants, revealing both the fact that he wasn't wearing any underwear and that he was growing considerably harder with every passing second. For a moment, Noah hesitated, hands resting on Oli's tattooed thighs, before looking up at me. I gave him a quick nod. It was all the reassurance he needed.

If Noah had indeed not touched a single dick that wasn't his own, he did a mighty fine job of hiding it. I watched in awe as he teased Oli with his hands, then his tongue, quickly reducing the other to a man made of nothing but groans and desire. The heat between my legs was becoming almost unbearable at the sight in front of me, two absolutely gorgeous men completely lost in their lust, but touching myself wasn't an option. I couldn't risk missing a single moment of what was happening.

“Fuck, Noah,” Oli moaned. “Don't…” How voice wavered a little as Noah wrapped his lips around his cock. “Don't take me too deep, you gotta sing tonight.”

With a hand in Noah's hair, Oli tried desperately to control the other man's sloppy but eager actions. Noah's nails were clawing into Oli's thighs, desperate for something to hold onto. My hands balled into fists at my sides, my thighs clenched. I hadn't entertained the idea that watching a man I was attracted to give a blowjob to another, equally attractive man could be a major turn on, but my bodily reactions were impossible to ignore.

Abruptly, Noah took Oli deeper, much deeper, leaving him to fall apart in an instant. Under chants filled with more profanity than I had ever heard, Oli came in Noah's mouth, back arching away from the wall, eyes squeezed shut. As soon as the feeling started to subside, Oli let go of Noah's hair and sunk down into his knees in front of him.

“Fucking hell, I told you not to do that.” His voice was harsh as he scolded Noah, but his fingers were soft as he wiped Noah's mouth clean. “You better rest your voice for the rest of the day.” Oli's eyes flickered up to me. “But I think there's some more work for your mouth to do.”

Suddenly, both pairs of eyes were on me. Oli’s face showed a grin, while there was nothing but hunger to be found in Noah’s glance. If it hadn’t been so fucking hot, it almost would have been intimidating.

In a few short steps, Noah was stood in front of me, heavily grasping my wrists to study the way I was still forming fists with my hands.

“On the bed. Now.”

“Voice rest, Noah!” Oli called from where he still sat on the floor. I studied him for a moment, looking utterly fucked out, eyes still half-lidded, pants still shoved down, not even bothering to tuck his dick back in. It shouldn’t have looked so tempting, really. Then I remembered Noah’s stern voice and when I looked up at him, I knew I better do as told.

He let go of me as I stood up, letting me crawl onto the bed until I was laying on my back in the middle of it, knees propped up and slightly spread to let my skirt fall open just that little bit. It wasn’t even close to being enough for Noah. With a predatory groan he came to kneel in between my legs, roughly pushing the fabric upwards and my thighs further apart and -

“Fuck,” he mumbled, hands tightly holding onto my legs, but his eyes were fully fixated on my left thigh.

I knew he had seen a hint of the tattoo before, as had Oli, but none of them had had the chance to admire it from the position it was meant to be looked at. The snake curled around my upper thigh, its tail end right in front in the middle, going around it once and then ending on my inner thigh, the snake’s tongue out, just mere moments away from my panties, as if ready to pounce any minute. Noah traced it, all the way, fingertips leaving goosebumps in their wake. I gasped when they reached the sensitive skin on the inside of my thigh, so close to where I wanted him. But before I could even think about begging, pleading, crying for more, his mouth descended on my flesh, leaving a bite on the head of the snake that bordered on pain. I moaned all the same, the pure satisfaction of the sensation overpowering any possible negative feelings.

“You’re fucking naughty, you know that?”

I wasn’t sure if I had ever heard Noah talk like that but combined with his low voice it left me trembling. His fingers were now at the edges of my underwear between my legs and then, without any warning, brushed my clothed centre.

“And so wet. Did you get off on blowing me or watching me suck Oli off? Probably both. Probably doesn’t take much to get you in this state.”

It didn’t. Not when it came to those two. Every look, every touch, every kiss constantly threatened to soak my panties. In fact, it routinely did. I was twitching under him now, unable to keep my reactions under control at the proximity of his face to my pussy. He finally took pity on me, roughly wrecking the panties from my legs, pulling them down and throwing them some place I couldn’t see, before grabbing and spreading my thighs again. I didn’t have it in me to feel self-conscious at the way he mustered me, committing my naked form to memory, I just needed his hands or his mouth or anything.

“Stop moving,” he grumbled before finally putting his mouth on me and I couldn't hold back a shout, the nerve endings firing through my whole body, and raising my hips up to meet him. “I said. Don't. Move.”

Suddenly, an arm was draped over me. Opening my eyes, unaware they had shut in pleasure, I saw Oli, kneeling on the bed next to me with a smirk and holding me down. “Better listen to the man. You want to be a good girl for Noah, don't you?”

I simply moaned in return, letting Oli hold me down as Noah’s tongue licked my wetness, teased my clit, somehow feeling like he was everywhere at once. I was already so impossible turned on that any playing he did with me was solely for his own pleasure - I was moments away from falling apart. Especially when he decided I was more than ready for two of his fingers inside of me, lean and long and hitting my spot so perfectly. I mewled and trashed against it all, only kept down by Oli’s strong grip.

“Such a whore for a little action, aren’t you? You’d be begging and pleading if your brain was working enough to let you speak.” Oli’ voice was so low, drenched in his accent as if it was coming out thicker than ever when he was turned on. His free hand travelled to my neck, testing my reaction if he squeezed its side a little and all I could do was arch further into it, taking it all, whatever either of them would be willing to give me.

Noah’s fingers were moving faster, the noises seemingly echoing through the room from how drenched I was and then, finally, finally, he started flicking my clit with his tongue in exactly the way I needed, hard and fast.

“You couldn’t be loud on the bus,” Oli said, “but you better be as loud as you can now.”

Staying quiet wasn’t even an option. Not when my orgasm washed over me, still rising and rising with Noah’s face between my legs, my hips buckling so violently even Oli couldn’t hold them down completely. I came with a scream, all tension releasing into the feelings of overpowering lust paired with utter trust as I was surrounded by the two men I couldn’t stop thinking about.

Comin down happened gradually, my mind a haze. I whined when Noah removed his fingers but couldn’t help but moan when I saw my wetness clinging to his face, cheeks flushed red but looking so content. Oli was softly petting my hair, all dominating features about him vanishing as checked up on my, making sure I was okay.

When Noah crawled up onto the bed with us, curling up next to me, effectively caging me in between them once again, I knew I was more than okay. I couldn’t even dream of being anything else.

•••

Noah ended up pretending he had woken up with a sore throat which caused everyone to accept his choice to be on vocal rest immediately as long as it meant he could do the set tonight. Oli and I had trouble keeping our giggles to ourselves every time someone around us mentioned it though. Only after giving Noah another stern talking to about being more careful when sucking someone off next time he was on tour. He hadn’t fought back, but the rolling of his eyes had said it all.

By early afternoon, Bring Me The Horizon had completed their soundcheck and left for food somewhere else, citing to be sick of catering at venues. I declined the invitation to come along and instead grabbed a plate of whatever the location had deemed “Mexican food” and retired to Oli’s dressing room. As nice as the peace and quiet was, I was aware I didn’t have all that much time to relax. And I desperately needed to call my roommate. I’d left her waiting for long enough.

“Would you mind moving out for next month?”

The question hit me like a ton of bricks. And not just because it was the first thing she said to me instead of greeting me like, you know, a normal person.

“I’m sorry?”

I tried recalling the current date but came up short. End of January though, surely. She couldn't seriously expect me to find somewhere new in a matter of days, right?

Right?

“My boyfriend got kicked out of his place so he’s moving in here.”

“I… I have nowhere to go,” I stammered.

“Okay.”

Well, she surely wasn’t going to be any help.

“What if I say no?” I asked. Maybe I would manage to find something for March. Mid-February if I got really lucky.

“Well, l already talked to our landlord and I’m the main renter on the contract so I was able to change your name to his.”

“So you already kicked me out, basically? What the fuck?” I didn’t even bother to keep my voice down. Asking me to move out was one thing, admitting that the decision had already been made without informing me at all was very much another.

“Yeah, sorry,” she replied without much remorse at all. “You can pick up your stuff before the first right?”

I hung up. I knew that if I attempted to say anything else, I’d turn mean and cruel and as much as I felt like she deserved it in that moment, that simply wasn’t who I wanted to be.

Sitting in the dressing room, silence engulfing me, it was like my body couldn’t decide whether it wanted to let me get into a rage or break out into tears. Either way, I was restless, panicky, unable to process what I’d just been told. I stood up so abruptly, the forgotten about plate on my lap clattered to the floor loudly. At least I’d already finished my meal - I doubt I could stomach any food right now.

I needed something to do, though. The band was still gone but the time suggested that Bad Omens would start soundchecking right about now, so I ventured into the main room of the arena. Anything not to be alone. Noah stood at the sound desk, chatting with Becky, the rest of the band already on stage and fine-tuning their instruments. I joined the two of them, ready to scold Noah for talking, but he turned to me and, in the quietest voice imaginable, told me he was only whispering. Promise.

“Don’t overdo yourself at soundcheck,” I warned him still. “Oli’s going to kill you if you can’t sing.”

He simply shook his head with a smile and brushed his hand against mine as he made his way to the stage.

“Anything I can do?” I asked Becky. “Oli’s gone, so…”

“Actually, yes!” she beamed. “One of our techs is running late after visiting family yesterday so if you’d like to be the hands to my brain and don’t mind me ordering you around a little bit, you’re more than welcome to help out.”

“Believe me, you can’t be worse than Oli,” I laughed. The heaviness of my phone call was still weighing me down, but Becky’s sunny being made me feel lighter immediately. It was far from the worst way to spend my time.

***

Noah made it through his set and with the help of a lot of shutting up and taking care of his throat, I was sure the absolute majority of people never even noticed his struggles. It was still decided he’d sit out on Antivist once more, so while Bad Omen’s packed up and left, I did my best to keep busy. I was basically begging people for jobs, double-checking if Becky really didn’t need anything more from me (I was torn between believing she could handle it and wondering if I’d maybe done so badly she simply didn’t trust me around her equipment anymore), even Oli was annoyed when he couldn’t find anything else for me to do. My frantic attempts not to let a single thought occur were intermittently interrupted by Noah texting me.

Noah You’re a right worker’s bee tonight, aren’t you? Aubrey Cutest bee you’ll ever see

I cringed the very second I sent the message. Why would I even text something like that? My mind was clearly driving me insane. I was still trying to figure out if there was a way to delete my message and pretend he’d never seen it when his reply came in.

Noah You’re the bee’s knees I don’t actually know what that saying means Do bees have knees? Aubrey You’d think I’d know all about the birds and the bees but unfortunately not in the literary way

I put my phone away as Bring Me The Horizon were about to take the stage, lending my hands to a few of the workers in the most menial ways to make sure the show would be perfect. It mostly involved me holding things or carrying them from one place to another. It sort of felt like they were humouring me, but I appreciated it nonetheless.

About half an hour later, they saw me off, thanking me for my work and telling me to enjoy the rest of my night off. It wasn’t really what I wanted, but there was nothing to do. So I set out to find a vacated seat somewhere high up in the arena where I wouldn’t bother anyone and pulled my phone back out. It seemed Noah had been providing me with a string of consciousness. I scrolled through his messages with a smile until I reached the end.

Noah Wish you were here with me

What followed was a picture of his face, half of it under the water of the bathtub he had apparently gotten into, wet hair proving he’d already dunked his head all the way before, big, brown eyes staring back at me. The soft, relaxed expression on his face made me want to throw my phone away and run to him.

Aubrey I’m surprised you’re fitting into the bathtub Did you even get your feet in? Noah Very spacious bathtub

Another photo, now facing away from him, most of his body hidden under a thin layer of bubbles, showed that he did, indeed, fit quite well.

Noah Definitely place for you here too Aubrey I feel like that heavily depends on what you aim to do with me in there

I knew what I expected. Flirts. Inappropriate comments that I would give back twice fold. Dirty thoughts, dirty words. Possibly a picture or two than promised more. But none of that appeared.

Noah Make you sit between my legs so I can embrace you A little massage for those hard working muscles Definitely enough space to wash your hair Hold you close until the water turns cold Wrap you up in one of those fluffy towels Fall asleep with you

It didn’t matter that I was sitting in a massive, 11,000-capacity arena. It didn’t matter that Shadow Moses was currently making the whole place shake. That I was surrounded by people focused on nothing but shouting out the lyrics so loud they would drown Oli out. All I knew was that I was staring at Noah’s words and I couldn’t breathe.

Was this the same man that suggested all of us only being in this for a bit of fun? Who didn’t want anyone to get too close to him? Who was so convinced of his own shortcomings that he wouldn’t even dare try? It didn't make sense.

I pulled up the last photo again, just for something to do, for something to look at, while I tried to make my mind up about what to do. About whether I should let myself fall and allow this… sweetness that didn’t have anything to do with hooking up in my life. Or if I should push back, call him out on it, stay strong, keep our resolution.

I found myself zooming in on the picture. A bottle of wine. Empty. Another one reflecting in the mirror, half full.

Aubrey Are you drunk? Noah Would you mind?

There was an anger rising up in me, a bitter taste that suddenly has a clear origin. So it wasn’t real. The clarification that sounded through his text hit me in the face with force. It wasn’t him changing his mind, it wasn’t him opening up and actually wanting more. It was simply him being wine-drunk, needy and alone. I didn’t care how soft his words were. Not when I was sure he wouldn’t have typed them quite the same sober.

Noah I miss you, angel Already Come over when the show is done

I stared at the words. My heart wanted to jump at the chance, tell him yes, yes I’ll come to you, take whatever he would give me, indulge in the brief idea of this being more, him being serious, him wanting me for real. But I couldn’t. I simply couldn’t. I’d fucked up before, back in Manchester, in a different way. I wouldn’t let us go down that path again. I couldn’t let him change his mind on a whim, again, and again, and allow myself to believe.

Aubrey I’ll see you tomorrow

•••

The tears started pooling in the corners of my eyes before I’d even properly shut the door to my room behind me. Everything I’d been trying to push away caught up with me all at once. Noah being unpredictable in his actions and his words. My roommate all but kicking me out. No job lined up once this tour ended.

I dragged myself under the shower, trying to wash away the bad feeling, thinking I could hide my tears if only I stayed under the stream of water for long enough, but my hair had been washed and conditioned, my body shaved and scrubbed and taken care of and I still couldn’t stop crying. It felt pathetic and weak. I should be able to handle this better. I’d always been able to handle myself.

But it was all too much, this time around. I’d never had to deal with the loss of a place to stay, no job prospects and the reality that I was catching feelings for people who didn’t reciprocate them all at the same time.

That was a lie. I wasn’t catching feelings. I was deep, deep into them already. There was no way to deny it anymore, not even to myself. The way my belly fluttered when I saw Noah or Oli wasn’t pure sexual attraction. Wanting to hold their hands, fall asleep next to them, sharing everything I could with them wasn’t platonic. Needing to get my hands on them, have their hands on me, feel them all over and inside wasn’t a friendship.

A sob wrecked from my mouth as I desperately tried to go through the motions. Drying my hair. Putting on a shirt to sleep in. Brushing my teeth. Yet I couldn’t stop. Every time I thought I had a chance of calming down, another wave of despair came over me and held me under.

A knock on the door made me jump, then freeze in the middle of my motions. Surely no one would come around this late? Maybe someone had the wrong room. I’d simply ignore it.

Another knock. I put my hand over my mouth to keep the sobbing at bay, trying not to let the person know I was even there. Angrily, I wiped a tear away that had slipped between my fingers and tickled my lips.

“Aubrey.” Oli’s voice was unmistakable. “Aubrey, I know you’re there. I can hear you crying.”

Fuck. There was no way I’d be able to get rid of Oli, no matter how much I hated the idea of letting him in and letting him see me like this. But my feet carried me even before I’d actively made the decision and when I saw him standing in front of me, all soft and worried, remnants of make-up lingering on his face, I all but fell into his arms. I only realised that there was something in his hand when he struggled to hug me back.

“Alright, on the bed you go, I’ve got you a hot chocolate and there’s a few pieces of chocolates in the pocket of my hoodie unless you’ve just crushed them.”

And just like that, I broke out into tears once again.

Oli ushered me on the bed, making sure I was tucked in nicely as I sat against the headboard before sliding under the blanket himself, his warmth immediately transferring to me. He handed me the mug, which felt like pure love between my fingers, and then scattered a few individually wrapped chocolates in front of us. When I leaned into him, his arm wrapped around my shoulders as if it had always meant to.

“Talk to me, love,” Oli whispered into your hair and it was all it took for my worries to pour out of me. Well, most of them. The mess in my head about Noah and him stayed hidden, tucked away in the fathers corners of my brain.

Oli held me close, letting me talk and talk and drop tears on his hoodie until I’m all cried out.

“How long have you known?”

“About the roommate situation? This afternoon. The job thing… well, it’s been an ongoing problem.”

He squeezed my body against his and for a moment it felt like he squeezed at least some of the pain away. I didn’t tell him that, but I buried my face a little deeper into his neck.

“Have you talked to your parents? Moving back home and asking for help is probably the last thing you want to do, but, you know…”

The question is enough to let tears well up again. So much for being cried out.

“I…” I swallowed, trying to force the lump in my throat to disappear. “I don’t speak to them anymore.”

Oli pushed me away a little bit, just enough to see my face, but still holding onto me.

“What happened?”

Somehow, the fact that he sounded genuinely shocked made it worse.

“It turns out, dating a girl was enough for my father to assume the devil had gotten into me. And my mother just follows whatever he says. So now the only contact I have with them is my father sending my mails about how to return to the good side of life and renounce the evilness that is being queer and me deleting them unseen.”

“Fuck, Aubrey, why didn’t you tell me?”

Why didn’t I tell him? I wasn’t so sure anymore, now. I knew we had drifted apart a little over the past year, keeping in contact but never actually seeing each other. I should have trusted him more.

Oli’s hand was gentle on my face as he moved my head toward him and pressed a short kiss to my lips. “Fuck them. We’re in this together, yeah? We’ll figure it out. Promise.”

And somehow, I believed him.

#Noah Sebastian fic #Noah Sebastian #Oli Sykes fic #Oli Sykes #Noah Sebastian x reader #Oli Sykes x reader #in love with the mess

105 notes · View notes

sorencd · 8 months

Text

FROM ME TO YOU

pairing: steven meeks x reader

summary: you've been receiving a ton of letters lately. no address or anything, just a letter. who's it from?

word count: 2k

a/n: I FINALLY FINISHED IT RAHHHHH I FINISHED IT THANK U TO WHOEVER REQUESTED THIS ANON I FORGOT BUT ANYWAYS I FINISHED IT RAHSHSHAHHHHH

masterlist

"you know, this isn't really fair. i was expecting people to not really like these types of crackers because come on! they're childish! practically child-shaped and screams 'child' all around!" you huff before sitting down on your desk with your arms crossed, not noticing the piece of paper in front of you.

"then why do you buy them then?"

"because it's good!"

"then maybe that's why they buy it."

you just came back from your quick stroll outside to unwind from the stressful lesson you and your brain were put through and to hopefully, score yourself some delicious goldfish crackers, but to your dismay, they were all out of your favorite snack.

"the shopkeepers by now should now that i absolute- what's this?"

"woah, there's another one!"

there on your desk sat an envelope that interrupted you from you rambling. there was no address, no sign, no nothing. the front and back were pristine as ever and it had only your name neatly written on the bottom corner. lately, you've been receiving a handful of letters of the same nature─ just your name and a romantic letter inside. you carefully opened the seal to retrieve its contents, expecting the usual lovesick and hopelessly devoted warble you've grown accustomed to. you have even begun to expect a note somewhere on you or your belongings early in the day, whether it be on your desk─ like the one in your hands right now, your bag, slid in between one of your books, or it would be shuffled in along with your notes.

"is it from the same person?" you continued carefully unsealing the paper while your friend watched you with eager eyes, excited to see what's in store this time.

you've got to hand it to whoever's doing this, though. they're very dedicated; continuously sending you love letters every day like it's their job. you'd receive one after another and another and another. this person made sure to never miss a date. you pulled out the love letter and along came it was a small flower stuck to the corner. a flutter from your heart travelled down to your toes and set your whole body in a feeling of excitement as you recognized what the flower symbolized; it made you forget all about not being able to eat the delectable treat you were so set on getting your hands on. you also had to resist the urge to grin like an idiot, keeping on the nonchalant facade and instead looked around the room for anyone who could possibly send this to you. but it was only you and your friend.

"so this is what you do in your spare time?"

steven jumped from his position behind the door and quickly pulled back into the corridor, frightened when charlie suddenly appeared out of thin air. he shook his head and pinched the space between his eyes with his fingers. if only he could muster up enough courage to hand the letters in person, but he knew better than anyone he'd only freeze on the spot and make a fool of himself, and the last person he wanted to weird out was you.

"i was only making sure (y/n) got my letter, i put a lot of effort into that."

"i think (y/n) would appreciate it more if you reveal yourself."

charlie received a scrunched and dumbfounded glare to his proposal. he was absolutely appalled that charlie could even suggest such a vile thing.

"come on! grow yourself a pair, eh?"

steven could only shake his head again to show his distaste to his friends suggestions. in the midst of his and charlie's bickering, steven failed to hear the soft clicking of shoes on the floor that was slowly approaching the doorway they resided in. he also failed to see the sly grin on charlie's face and his gaze that went beyond his eyeglasses' frame, it was your turn to give him a heart attack.

before you were about to head for the washroom, a familiar body was standing to your left along with someone else. it was that boy who you shared a class or two with, steven. recently, you've begun to notice that to you, he stands out more amongst the crowd. in a sea of people, you could easily discern him amidst the haze. this feeling gradually came onto you the more you saw him, and a silent hope behind the back of your mind wished that the anonymous letters were from him. after all─ the few times you came across his handwriting, at least often enough for you to recognize it, you could clearly see a resemblance between the two. but you just concluded it's your mind corroborating something for you to keep yourself from succumbing into insanity.

"(y/n)! what a surprise!"

"hi steven! hi… charlie?"

"right on the money!"

the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard, akin to something straight out of heaven was all his mind was set on. your laughter that steven loved so much filled the air and rang through his ears like a god-sent melody. in short it was angelic, and the things he’s willing to do just to hear it again would’ve made him a wanted man.

"alright. if you both will excuse me, i have somewhere to go to. it was nice meeting you two!"

and there you go. quickly scurrying off into the crowd-filled hallways and blending in, disappearing from steven's line of sight just as quick as you've arrived.

"if i were you i'd be quicker about asking (y/n) out. drop the 'mysterious kid' act and get yourself a lover!" he received a shove from charlie accompanied by a cheshire-cat smile.

charlie was very adamant on helping him, steven concluded. and if he wanted to be free of the constant daydreaming about you, and get charlie to stop pestering him, he figured maybe it is time to reveal himself to you.

with a rub to his sinus, steven begrudgingly agreed to remove the anonymity of his letters and finally give your secret-admirer a proper name.

you were organizing each of the letters in your small box that hid in the depths of your bag in the washroom to avoid anyone from seeing what you're doing. it wasn't like you compiling the letters was wrong, you just wanted privacy from prying eyes and a little breathing room for yourself.

and all the while steven anxiously waited outside, a large lump in his throat that he couldn't seem to swallow no matter how much he tried. his fingers constantly fiddling as a result of his heart rapidly beating out of the cage of his chest, and every sound made him flinch. his nerves were buzzing like wildfire. was he really going to do this? reveal himself to you? what would you think? he shouldn't have listened to charlie. but on the other hand, he's got nothing to lose. aside from his dignity and maybe having to bear the pain of you trying to avoid him to relieve the awkwardness that could ensue, though that wasn't really much of an issue. at least steven thinks it's not. at the end of the day, he could always just walk away; you haven't seen him anyways.

a small, shocked gasp came from his left pulled him out of his train of thoughts and overanalyzing of the situation at hand, it was you. he mirrored your surprised movements and let out a shout of his own, he took a few steps back to recuperate. great, now it was too late and there's no way to get out of this now.

"steven! i didn't expect to see you again." he watched your eyes crinkle along your toothy smile, and for a moment he didn't know what to say. he was absolutely smitten just from hearing your voice.

"is everything alright?"

"y-yeah uhm, i was just about to-" he darted his eyes around before settling them back on you, "can we go somewhere else? i-i'd like to tell you something."

you nodded, albeit not without hesitance due to his sudden invitation. the pair of you walked together. him leading you to where you presume is the spot by the lake, given you were walking towards the door where behind it would reveal the fields outside of hellton.

the walk on the way was nothing short of quiet and tense, is how you'd like to put it. you were tempted to initiate small talk, given that your surroundings were eerily quiet, and the silence was starting to ring in your ears, but you feared the conversation would just be short lived. so you opted to keep your mouth shut the entire short trip.

and now, after hearing nothing except for your shoes clashing with the floor, it was replaced with the chirp of birds and soft walking atop the grass. you heard steven halt in his tracks while you were busy admiring the view, and when you switched your focus to look back at him, you were now standing by a lake. the scenery feels like it was pulled straight out of a story book from winnie the pooh, you commented to yourself as you lifted your head to face steven. the crisp gush of the wind gently glazing your cheeks. but the boy in front of you shielded most of it.

"so- what i was meaning to say was…." he paused, breaking eye contact to look down at his shoes before taking a deep breath. he wasn't sure if what he was doing was the right thing, or was it the right time to do so, but he already caught himself in whatever all of this is. and he's not turning back.

"it was me."

"it was.. you? the one who took the last bag of goldfish crackers?"

"what? no uhm.. i'm the one who's been.. you know.. sending those letters.."

"oh." blood rushed to your cold cheeks and cascaded a warm red-hued tint, your eyes slightly widened and your lips were parted. this was surprising, you weren't really expecting it to be him. you thought he had no interest in anything involving romance because to you, he was very focused on studying. maybe there's more to him than you thought. you inhaled, trying to recollect yourself as quickly as possible. but how could you when someone just confessed to being your secret admirer?

"i was wondering too if you'd maybe like to, i don’t know.. go out on a date..? with me? sometime? we could go to that library you like that's nearby, i mean it's the only library nearby." there, he said it. he shot his shot, he can't take it back now.

"i think i'd like that."

steven felt his heart stop, he was blessed with seeing your smile that was as bright as the sun face to face, and it was directed to him! he must be dreaming! with his mouth agape and his cheeks impossibly redder than yours, he tried saying anything, anything at all that would tell you how pretty he thought you were, but nothing came out. the sudden irritating ringing of the bell saved him from the embarrassment he could've put himself into, it was time to return to classes again.

"i'll see you later?"

"yeah, bye-bye steven. i'll see you later!" you shouted after him. steven had to fix his footing to prevent himself from tripping while he walked away. he turned back to wave at you again, who was walking towards the opposite direction. the boy with new profound energy rushed towards his next class as fast as his legs would allow him.

"someone's happy." gerard pointed out when steven took a seat beside him, a lopsided giddy grin on his lips and a slight bounce to each step he took. he felt like he was over the moon.

"see, i told you. you had nothing to worry about." a voice from behind, which belonged to charlie, who was wearing a smug expression, chimed in.

steven couldn't really hear what they were saying, though. he’s too busy daydreaming about how fun the library date would be, his own thoughts blocking out the others' voices. and he’s already conjuring up the next letter he's about to make for you out of pure excitement, maybe he'll include a poem or two into it, too.

#steven meeks x reader #steven meeks #dead poets society x reader #dead poets society

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umeoniii · 1 year

Note

Hii! I was thinking female reader x Hange Zoe smut! Maybe reader is jealous and upset with hange seeming so invested in Pieck (you know cuz she's the cart titan). Hange starts to notice reader acting upset which leads to comfort sex. I dunno something cute and smutty

jealous reader & hange

(｀_´)ゞ

you sat alone in the courtyard watching the sunset, picking at your food. steak rice and water, the same thing as usual. you sat and thought, what drove me here? sitting alone with nothing but anger bubbling in my chest?

usually you’d be sitting with hange, listening to her ramble while you ate and nodded. a shiver ran through your body as the warm summer breeze went through you, bringing a few small flower petals aside your foot. you listened to the nighttime cicadas coming to life.

you were jealous, jealous of your lover’s friend, pieck. you didn’t trust their relationship, you were fine with hange having friends, but pieck made you feel something else. possessiveness. you weren’t possessive, or at least you thought you weren’t.

it’s been quite a while since hange and peick have been friends. about 3 months to be exact, it’s been 3 months since you’ve watched from afar with jealousy. you knew it was horrible for you to be jealous and to not have trust in hange but you couldn’t help it.

pieck had something that you didn’t have and that’s what hange liked about her. you’d watch how her face would light up when talking to her. you couldn’t help but think what would you have to do for her to appreciate you more, because you weren’t gonna just let this pass by like absolutely nothing. you’d wake up earlier to have an early start on looking even better, maybe that would’ve gotten her attention.

you’d wear your hair different ways , try to wear more pleasant clothes, you had even tried a little bit of makeup. there were times you’d even try to appear more provocative around hange. shoving your tits in her face or getting on all fours to pick something up, hoping she’d stare at your ass. she noticed it and would compliment you, but not in the way you wanted her to.

you started to become more jealous and bitter over it. you always told yourself that if hange wanted pieck that she would’ve already left you, so you were safe. but you still couldn’t help but hate her.

you’d look in your mirror before bed, mumbling and laughing to yourself “she’s not better than me, i have a whole lot more than her. im so much more desirable.” you’d then put your silky pink night gown on and go to sleep. sometimes crying yourself to slumber because of how much it pissed you off.

one day things were different though. the first time you saw them get super close, and most certainly the last. hange got super close to her, pulling her into a tight hug, jumping up and down.

you walked up with a smile inquiring about why she and pieck were so close like that.

“ive been begging her for weeks to let me experiment on her and the titan and she finally gave in! well kinda…” she smiled cheekily

she genuinely sounded so happy about it, you weren’t though.

you scanned them up and down with your eyes before turning around walking away. your finger nails digging into the flesh of your palm, fist clenching from the pure abhorrence.

that night hange came into your room, sitting next to you while you were laying down. she saw you were wearing another one of those lacy night gowns she knew you loved a lot. this one hugged your curves just the right way, it was a v neck as well, she stared at your cleavage while you were lying down.

she rubbed the side of your upper thigh “hey honey.”

“im not in the mood, go back to work.” you sighed turning around towards the opposite way of hange.

she slid her hands under the silk fabric rubbing your ass, “just what do i have to do to get under those cute panties.” she whispered

“stop talking to her.” you responded bluntly

you can feel her shocked face burning holes into your back.

“you know i can’t do that, she’s very vital to my studies.”

“then get out. m’ not gonna ask you again.”

you felt the weight of the bed lessen as she respected your wish and got off your bed.

you heard the door open and close as she took her exit.

and everyday after that you gave hange more of a slight attitude.

“look at what i read about today, isn’t it weird?”

“yup.” you looked away

“i found this for you at the store, do you like it?”

“it’s great” you say, not paying attention at all to the conflicting colors on the dress.

she noticed the complete change in your demeanor and assumed it might’ve still been because of pieck, so she tested the theory.

“i found this at the store, do you think pieck would like it?”

you turned from your vanity to look at the dress, it was very revealing. it was cute a pink, frilly, skimpy little dress. it pissed you off that she wanted her to wear something so… revealing. and you knew that she knew the dress was something of your fondness and that’s exactly why she asked.

and her theory was proven correct , because after you took in the view of the dress you turned around and threw your lipstick at her.

“the fucks wrong with you!? i was so right, you do have something for her! you probably have weird little fantasies about having sex with her titan or some shit! you might as well fuck her with how you’ve been acting! get out!” you yelled.

“ y/n hun, it’s not like that, you know i love you more than titans or anything im interested in, i put you before anything.” she stood up looking at you.

“oh my god, get. out.” you pushed her through the door and slammed it.

you heard her voice muffled through the oak door, “you know what, stay in there and cry about it. im not working myself up with your crazy little delusions.” she walked off

you sat back on your bed, you didn’t want hange to be right but you felt your lip tremble as your nails digged into your thighs. tears ran down your cheek as you tried not to think too hard about it. once again, you cried yourself to sleep. all i’ve done is sat and been pretty for her, all for her to get mad at me.

you woke up to the rhythm of knocks on your door. your head turned and you sat up as you saw your door open, hange walked in with a expressionless face. she walked and sat on the bed next to you.

“you’re not seriously jealous of her though, are you? you don’t actually believe i’d ever leave you if i had the choice? you’re the only woman i want to be with. i wouldn’t chose another woman over you on even my darkest of days.” she said rubbing your thigh with her palm.

you sniffled as she wiped the tears off your cheeks.

“you’re better than that y/n, you’re so-”

“you seem to enjoy yourself more around her.” you scoffed

“well im sorry that i get excited about that kinda stuff, but you still know i love you.” she picked up your face, your doe eyes glimmering from the still wet tears inside of your eyes.

she brought your lips closer to hers.

“tell me though y/n, do you think the things that i do to you pieck will never get to experience?”

you shook your head

“that’s what i thought.” her soft lips drifted over the goosebumps on your neck before biting your neck, sucking on your supple skin.

you let out a soft yelp clawing at her clothed back.

she nipped and sucked at you skin undressing you slowly and whispering sweet praises into your ear.

“i’ll never love anyone else like this.” she said, her fingers drifting to your panties. you stifle your moan, pushing her hand away.

she looks up at you through her glasses, pulling you hand away forcefully and bringing your underwear down.

“god you’ve been such a brat y/n, im just trying to show you how much i really do appreciate and love you.” she whispered softly into your ear.

she opened you legs staring at your glistening cunt kissing and licking at you.

“you’re so beautiful.” she speaks in between laps, “i love you so much.” her tongue flicks against your hardened bud as she shook her head in between your thighs, gripping them as though she were holding onto a cliff in which she was hanging off of. her tongue slipped inside of your hole, licking at the ridges and wetness brewing deep inside of you.

“i want you to sit on my face baby.” she muffled inside of you, vibrations in your cunt causing you to whimper and squeeze her head with your thighs.

“huh?” you looked at her tears clouding your vision.

she unlatched her mouth from your pussy, “ i said i want you on my face.” she layed on your soft duvet laying her head back onto the pillow. you turned your body and sat onto hange’s face not giving her a chance to breathe.

she started lapping vigorously at your sweet cunt nibbling on your folds. then she went back to sucking on your hardened clit.

god, hange loved having you atop her face. she loved staring down your body, listening to your whines and whimpers as she gave you princess treatment.

you placed your hands onto her shoulders riding her face as her tongue stuffed you and her nose bumped against your clit. the friction was a lot, your brain even foggier from the pleasure. you couldn’t even remember why you were on top of hange practically screaming her name.

hange’s brown hair was in between your fingers while you whimpered her name “oh god hange fuck” you mewled looking at her looking up at you. she drifted her hands up your gown pinching at your nipples.

you gasped from the feeling, eyes shut tight. you felt her mumbling into your cunt, probably about how much she cherished you. you felt how her thumb started to rub your bud faster, and how her tongue got thrusted and rubbed faster. you felt yourself getting closer to your orgasm going faster. you looked down at hange who was looking up at you

“ m’ gonna cum han’ ” you whimpered gripping her hair tighter.

she gave you a a little nod setting you over edge as you came inside of her mouth. hange slurped up your cum, eating it like it was honey. you leaned forward catching your breath while hange slowly moved her face up from your cunt. she gasped for breath, “ i don’t love pieck like this, i would never eat her pussy and swallow her cum like i do you.” she kissed the inside of your thigh and the valley between your breasts.

“i… love… you too” you panted

her pretty lips pecked your cheeks, “ i won’t ever make you feel unappreciated again.” she layed her head in the crook of your neck.

a/n: i got a little bit carried away… i hope u love it though! sorry it took a lil bit long

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moonstruck-poet · 5 months

Text

For All Time

Pairing - Loki x fem!reader

Summary - the reader was Loki's bestfriend since childhood until teenage and he was in love with her but maybe they were just never meant to be.

Warnings - death

Requested by - @akshinayak I reaally hope it was good enough and tysm for the request!

They say breaking up with your partner hurts the most. That's not true, Loki thought to himself. They say falling out of love hurts the most. That's not true, he thought.

"What really hurt-" he whispered to himself and clenched his jaw. His crown of long, black horns feeling a lot burdensome. "-Is knowing that you would've had a chance, would've had a future together. But you didn't. All because of your own selfish reasons and insecurities".

He scoffed, leaning back onto his new throne, one that he ironically had no intentions of wanting and gripped the handle.

The frustration about himself melting away to make way for deep, agonizing pain and heartbreak as he caught onto a thread of your lifeline.

Loki's lips were tightly pressed together when he decided to watch over you, something that he had done last night itself. He couldn't help himself, seeing as your condition was deteriorating day by day.

With a deep sigh leaving his lungs, he closed his eyes, head leaning back against the throne as a certain memory drifted into focus. Putting everything else on hold.

"Fancy any one of them, do you?" Your playful voice asked when he looked at various pictures of princesses.

"Absolutely not," he slammed the last one on the table.

"Pity. I would've loved to see my best friend getting married".

Best Friend. He gritted his teeth, running a hand through the long locks and looking out of the window. That's all he would ever be. A best friend. Nothing more. Never.

Despite being able to sense emotions and read people well, the God of Mischief failed to recognise your feelings. He somehow never took notice of your lingering touches, of your constant staring and looking at him as though he had hung the stars."

Do you have anyone in your mind Loki?" You asked quietly and stood next to him. His emerald irises clashing against your golden-brown ones. "You can tell me, you know?"

You. Its always been you.

He wanted to scream it out loud, wanted to yell and make the whole world know the fact that it was you whom he had fallen for.

"There's no one," he answered abruptly and completely avoided your gaze, and in the meanwhile also not noticing the way your eyes seemed to dull.

He had loathed himself for every passing second after that incident. How different would life have been had he confessed his feelings right then?

He would still have to go through everything, but at least he could've had you right by his side. And that alone would've made all the difference in the world.

He swallowed the misery before regaining control and finally looking at you from high above. But in an instant his facade broke, face contorting in pain upon seeing your weak and frail body. A startling contrast to the strong and regal woman that you had once been.

"Oh my love," he whispered to himself, his eyes raking over every little change that had taken place in the short course of twenty four hours.

You had injured yourself, heavily. A group of oursiders had somehow managed to invade your territory, catching everyone off guard and naturally you had taken the lead.

Fighting alongside Lady Sif and your husband, Alvis.

Another painful wound struck his heart when he saw the said person entering your room, his face drowned in sorrow and desperation.

"How are you, my queen?" Alvis sat down next to her.. Next to his queen, Loki said in his mind.

"I am fine," you smiled back, your expression the epitome of exhaustion.

"Rest, yes?" He said and took her hands in his, caressing the skin. "I will be back soon enough, have to go through some work".

Loki watched as you barely managed to nod, he watched as your loving husband pressed a kiss on your forehead, something that he was supposed to do.

A harsh breath escaped his throat and he let go of the branch, his heart not being able to see its other half being in immense pain.

He had no rights, absolutely none to want himself to be in the place of your husband. He was selfish, arrogant, entitled, pessimistic whereas Alvis was the complete opposite.

You had found yourself a man who loved and worshipped you exactly the way you were supposed to be. He could've never been able to do that. You deserved someone so much better than him. Always.

"Would it be so bad, hmm?" You questioned softly, searching his eyes for an answer.

"I fail to understand what you are talking about," he muttered and looked anywhere but at you.

"I think you understand perfectly enough".

He didn't answer and walked away, because what else was he supposed to do?

"Is the idea how us getting merried so bad that you can't even look at me?" You asked, a small smile on your face.

"I did not say that".

"You surely implied that".

"I-" he cut himself off and turned to face you, his expression holding anger. "I do not wish to get married," he stated, his eyes glaring into yours but you were barely fazed.

"Okay," was all you could say and Loki immediately noticed the way your face changed drastically. You tried to offer him a smile, but for once he saw right through that.

"Okay," you repeated again, backing away from him, taking one step at a time which lead to a huge barrier between the two.

He merely watched you leave, rooted the spot. He probably didn't know it, but he had lost you at that moment. Not as friends no, you would always continue being friends. No one in the universe could possibly break one of the strongest bonds between two people.

"I love you," he whispered to the now empty room, falling down to his knees as a lone tear slipped down his cheek. "Always".

Loki let out a bitter laugh at the memories. Out of all the things he could've said, he uttered the most bitter lies.

He was a changed man now. He replayed all those moments in his head, being able to see all the chances that he had lost. Seeing just how hurt you had been from every selfish comment he had made.

What would he give to go back and change everything instantly.

It was unfathomable, the amount of love his entire being held for simply one person. Nobody ever came close, and never would. He may have been a narcissist, an arrogant liar, a tricking asshole.

But there was one thing that nobody else could do other than him. And that was to love you, adore you in such a way that a mere hiccup in your life caused him pain. To care for you like you held his lifeline in your rough, scarred, but soft hands. To want you in a way that nobody had done before.

Because that's how Loki has. If he loved someone, he loved them enough to terrify himself about the lengths he would go for, namely for the person's happiness.

He had done so countless of times for you, and unknown to him, you had cherished every single minute of those special occasions. Keeping them so close to your heart that they bloomed whenever you were happy and blocked your breathing when you were devastated.

He was lost in thought, but a sudden tug in his chest pulled him out. Loki frowned at the strange feeeling, his intuiton telling him something terrible had happened.

His breathing quickened as he gripped the branch, your branch, noticing the fading green light causing sweat to erupt on his forehead and neck.

"No, no no no," he chanted, feeling as though the world had collapsed upon seeing the scene in front of him. "No," he whispered, heart slowly but surely shattering.

He watched Alvis, tapping your cheek frantically and gently shaking your body as he yelled for the doctors to be brought. "Stay with me, my queen. The doctors are coming, please, stay with me!"

Sif was on your other side, holding one of your hand in hers, pressing the back to her lips. "I'm sorry," she whispered in between tears as her body shook.

Your face, Loki saw and swallowed. It was still as beautiful as ever. Those golden-brown eyes that made him catch his breath everytime he glanced your way, those sharp eyebrows arching whenever you narrowed your eyes playfully and that gorgeous smile that you presently held.

"I'm okay," you croaked out, "I'm alright".

The two people surrounding you simply cried harder at that, bowing their heads and pressing the back of your hand to their temple. Their way of paying respect to the bravest warrior they'd seen.

Loki's chest felt empty, as though his heart too was slowly dying, following his soulmate to the afterlife. Silent tears were flowing down his cheeks without a halt. There was only one thing he could think of to do now and he did just that.

Your eyes were half open, understanding that your end was nearing soon and you didn't have any regrets. You had lived a beautiful life inspite of the hardships.

But then a sudden warmth made you open your eyes completely for one last time. Your head tilted to see the rays of light gushing in through the open window, bathing your entire body in its glow.

You didn't fail to notice the green tint that was present and your heart skipped a beat, despite already being in a fragile state. "Loki," you whispered, your voice barely audible but the one who needed to hear it heard his name clearly.

And you took your final breath, a content smile on your face as your eyes closed.

His soul shattered next, everything suddenly feeling cold all of a sudden as he slumped back in his throne, breathing heavily and swallowing harshly.

"Rest easy, my love. I will love you, for all time, always," he said to the skies.

===============================

#loki #loki fanfic #loki x reader #loki x female reader #marvel fanfiction #loki fanfction #loki angst #loki x oc #loki x reader angst #loki laufeyson #loki odinson

102 notes · View notes

gerrystamour · 11 months

Text

nothing to say, and nowhere to go (the taste of the divine)

Rated E | Steddie Week Day 1: Hunger | 1900 Words | Complete

[ READ ON AO3 ]

Steve found himself staring at Eddie’s mouth. It wasn’t the first time he did that, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. But this truly took the cake for the most inappropriate time to do it. This is my entry for @steddie-week Day 1, loosely following the prompt Hunger. Posting a bit early for my timezone because I have a busy-ish day tomorrow. Enjoy!! CW: This fic is rated Explicit for smut below the cut.

Steve found himself staring at Eddie’s mouth.

It wasn’t the first time he did that, and it certainly wouldn’t be the last. But this truly took the cake for the most inappropriate time to do it.

It had been Steve’s bright idea to encourage Eddie to start holding the Hellfire meetups at his house, wanting to watch his boyfriend in action. He’d heard a lot about Eddie when he was in the zone, and Steve just wanted to see it. Plus, since they would be playing late that meant Steve could easily convince Eddie to stay the night and maybe, just maybe, if Eddie was super keyed-up after the game ended…

At the start, things were going well. Steve sat back and observed as they played and yeah, Eddie was a sight to behold when he was like this; passionate, animated, excited. Steve could watch him like this forever.

Then combat began, which meant there was a lot of bickering and squabbling at each turn and Eddie took this time to start snacking on the pretzels Steve set up behind his DM screen.

That’s where it started to go wrong for Steve.

The first couple of pretzels, Eddie popped straight into his mouth, crunched them loudly while he laughed openly at the plan the kids were trying to devise. Steve pulled a face, a bit disgusted, but he couldn’t deny the fondness he felt, too.

Then Eddie started doing that thing he did, that thing Steve was certain was deliberate and designed specifically to drive him absolutely insane.

The Dungeon Master would lift a pretzel to his mouth just to rest it on his plush bottom lip, poke his tongue out just enough to lick at the salt. Then he’d drop his chin just a bit, hook the pretzel with his tongue, and lift it into his mouth. Did Eddie finally chew it and be done with it? Of course not.

Steve could tell by the way his jaw shifted that he was playing with the pretzel on his tongue, sucking it gently. It brought images of Eddie sucking other things to Steve’s mind and it was actually embarrassing how quickly his cock began to wake up.

Then Eddie would chew the pretzel, putting Steve out of his misery, to describe the results of whatever the kids managed to do. To Steve’s dismay, Eddie just started the whole process over with another goddamn pretzel.

So there Steve was, half-hard and staring at his boyfriend’s mouth while a gaggle of teenagers were right fucking there, and he couldn’t bring himself to actually look away.

Eddie had started the ritual again, but this time the corners of his mouth were ticked upward in a little smirk. It was enough for Steve to tear his gaze away to take in Eddie’s whole face.

Eddie was looking at Steve, and now that their eyes met, his smirk turned into a dimpled grin. The menace lifted the pretzel he’d been licking gently just enough that he could poke the tip of his tongue through one of the holes suggestively. When Steve took in a shaky breath, Eddie winked and popped the pretzel into his mouth with a crunch.

After that, Eddie stopped with the pretzels and focused on the combat happening, leaving Steve sitting a short distance away with his cock actually straining against his fly. How was he supposed to get up and flee when he was in this condition?

But Steve didn’t want to flee. Deep down he desperately wanted to kick everyone out so he could crawl under the table and taste his boyfriend, to lap the salt from his thick cock the same way Eddie worked his tongue over the pretzel. Steve wanted to hop onto the table in front of Eddie and drag that pink, pretty, smug mouth onto his cock.

It was a hunger so intense that Steve felt fucking lightheaded with it.

“Alright!”

Steve was snapped out of his spiraling fantasies by the sharp clap of Eddie’s hands. He was glad the magazine he had been reading was covering his lap because the tent in his jeans was very obvious.

“We are taking a break! Someone should get on ordering pizza while we replenish snacks and drinks. Meanwhile, our amazing host will help me find a new shirt,” Eddie announced, and everyone basically scattered to the different tasks.

Steve blinked in confusion until he saw the wet patch on Eddie’s shirt. “What? When’d that happen?”

“Just a second ago. Got a bit overzealous when I grabbed my drink,” Eddie said slyly as he got up and walked across the room to loom over Steve. “You gonna help me out with finding a dry shirt, big boy?”

If he wasn’t so focused on getting his boyfriend alone for at least fifteen minutes before anyone came looking for him, Steve would’ve been embarrassed at how quickly he stood up. The two of them practically scrambled up the stairs into Steve’s bedroom where Eddie immediately slammed the door shut. With a shockingly graceful movement, Eddie had Steve pinned against it while he flicked the lock and soon, he was kissing Steve hungrily.

Steve melted under his ministrations, groaning thickly when Eddie bullied his tongue into his mouth. Eddie was everywhere it seemed, the long line of his body pressed against Steve’s front, his greedy mouth devouring Steve’s, both hands in Steve’s hair.

Then Eddie dropped to his knees with a too-loud thump and immediately began pulling at Steve’s belt and fly, yanking his jeans and boxers halfway down.

“Whoa, whoa-oh fuck, Eds,” Steve moaned as Eddie began mouthing at his balls and up the underside of his cock until he rested the tip of Steve’s dick against his soft lower lip.

Eddie’s big brown eyes looked up at Steve through his lashes, a smirk ticking up one side of his mouth as he poked his tongue out to tease the slit of Steve’s cock, lapping up the bead of precum that had formed at the tip. The noise that burst from Steve’s chest would’ve been embarrassing if he wasn’t so desperately turned on.

“Eds, please,” Steve panted, but Eddie just hummed and kept teasing, making Steve shake and whimper where he stood against the door.

Eddie’s hands left Steve’s body briefly, and Steve vaguely registered the sound of him rifling in his pockets. When Eddie’s hands returned, one wrapped back around his cock to stroke it slow and loose. The other one snuck between his thighs to touch slick fingers to his hole.

Steve’s legs shook dangerously as Eddie pressed two fingers into him and fucked them in out of him. All the while, Eddie just lapped at the tip of his cock, poking the slit with the tip of his tongue.

Then Eddie crooked his fingers just so, immediately finding Steve’s prostate with practiced ease and massaged it relentlessly. Choking on what would have been a scream, Steve watched as Eddie lapped up every thick spurt of cum he worked out of him. Each drag of Eddie’s fingers over Steve’s sweet spot punched a broken little whine out of him, and Eddie groaned happily as more precum dribbled onto his tongue.

“Eddie, please,” Steve sobbed, tears stinging his eyes as he shook against the door.

With a chuckle, Eddie pulled away slightly and smirked, a chain of precum stretching between his lip and Steve’s cock.

“Please, what, Stevie?” Eddie asked before angling his thumb to press into his taint at the same time he crooked his fingers viciously.

“Oh fuck, Eds, please, need your mouth, please,” Steve begged, his shattered voice raising in pitch as the pleasure mounted and mounted. There was now a steady stream of precum leaking from Steve’s cock.

“You have my mouth, though,” Eddie cooed, shifting forward so Steve’s cock was against his bottom lip again, moaning as he lapped at the slit again.

“In, please, in your mouth, need it so bad, please,” Steve gasped, his eyes crossing as Eddie began massaging his prostate again.

“I think you just want my mouth. You don’t need it, do you, big boy?” Eddie sighed, pressing a sucking kiss around the sensitive tip of Steve’s cock. This time, Steve couldn’t stop the near-scream that was ripped from him and he barely stopped his knees from buckling.

“Please, please, please Eds, you know-oh, fuck, Eds, you know I don’t—fuck, I don’t like coming like this,” Steve whimpered, which wasn’t the entire truth.

He liked coming like that, with just Eddie’s fingers working his prostate and taint, but it didn’t do much to settle him down. It would get him off, but he’d still be a bit hot and any amount of friction against his cock stood the chance of reigniting his arousal. It just meant he would be easy to rile back up.

Which was probably Eddie’s plan the whole time; get Steve off now in a way that wasn’t properly fulfilling, keep him hot and hungry for Eddie for another four hours, then devour him completely once the house was empty after Hellfire.

“You don’t like me milking your sweet little prostate, Stevie?” Eddie pouted without stopping, and Steve felt his balls draw up tight. He was about to blow, and he couldn’t even find the words to warn Eddie.

Eddie, however, knew Steve’s tells, especially the wordless ones, and he gave Steve’s prostate one last vicious jab. Steve strangled the scream that ripped out of him as he came in thick stripes onto Eddie’s tongue and chin. Pulling back, Eddie caught the last few spurts of Steve’s cum on his chest, truly wrecking his Hellfire t-shirt.

Steve didn’t even have a chance to catch his breath before Eddie was surging up to kiss him deeply, feeding him the mouthful of cum he caught. The fingers withdrew from his hole, leaving Steve empty and twitching which pulled a sad little whine from his throat. Distantly, he was aware of Eddie reaching between them, the sound of Eddie’s belt and then his fly opening. Steve registered the way Eddie’s arm was moving and knew his boyfriend was frantically jerking off, and he wanted to help but Eddie was kissing him too well.

As if reading his mind, Eddie pulled back and pushed Steve to his knees.

“Take it, baby, ‘bout to come,” Eddie sighed, grinning almost maniacally when Steve’s lips instantly dropped open, his own cum still coating his mouth.

Eddie pushed his cock inside, and Steve took him as deep as he could manage, happy to choke and gag on the girth of him.

Eddie came within two thrusts and Steve swallowed every drop of it as it hit his tongue and the back of his throat. Eventually, Eddie pulled back and crouched in front of a dazed, very happy Steve, and kissed him senseless.

“Now I really need to borrow a shirt,” Eddie giggled as he stood up and hurried over to the closet.

When they finally left Steve’s bedroom, they were confronted by Gareth standing at the bottom of the stairs with his arms crossed.

“What’s up, Garebear?” Eddie asked with an easy grin.

“We’re never having Hellfire here again,” Gareth started with an unimpressed glare, “if you two are going to loudly fuck upstairs while we’re all down here trying to eat.”

With that, Gareth walked away toward the kitchen and Steve grimaced.

“We’re never gonna hear the end of this,” Steve groaned, and Eddie laughed.

“Nope. Now let’s go face the music. I’m starving,” Eddie sighed, adjusting the yellow sweater he borrowed as he started walking away.

[ AO3 LINK ]

Taglist! @patchworkgargoyle, @scarcrossdlvrs, @amerikanskaya-krassavitsa (it's not letting me tag ur sideblog), @afewproblems, @mylilplanet, @steddie-there, @xenon-demon, @indigohightide I hope you enjoyed the fic!!! Please consider reblogging!! Let me know in the tags or the reblog comments if you would like to join the taglist for the other Steddie Week fics!

#steddie #steve x eddie #steddieweekafterdark #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie fic #gerry writes

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wet-and-wedgied · 8 months

Text

I Destroyed a Toilet

Oh my god, this is so embarrassing. I had a really big breakfast this morning and I think I added a bit too much creamer to my coffee because the whole morning I was feeling absolute bloated. And worse we had a meeting. The entire time was in my chair, trying to look professional but inside I could just feel the heavy weight in my guts, churning. I one hundred percent knew I was going to need to take a shit as soon as possible. And it was going to be messy.

I tried to act calmly as I could once the meeting, which felt like it took forever, finally ended. I grabbed my stuff, set it down at my desk and headed to the toilet. Unfortunately for me it seemed like a lot of the other men had had the same idea. When I first walked in all the stalls were taken. I frowned as I turned around walked back out feeling my gut gurgle in protest. I really needed a bathroom now. I head back to my desk, and proceeded to stake out the bathroom waiting for an opening as I desperately tried to keep my aching bowels in check.

it seemed however like the toilet gods were messing with me. As soon as a man would leave the toilets, another would be right there to take his place, leaving home high and dry. I moaned, but tried to keep it softly to myself. I really needed to fart, but with my stomach aching, I wasn’t sure I could trust it. I didn’t realize too how torturous it would be to take note of the other men getting to release. I noticed one of my co-workers head into the bathroom and stay in there for a good twenty minutes before re-emerging having no doubt taken a great day shit.

I had waited about thirty minutes when finally there was an opening for me, and I speed walked into the bathroom. Inside only one stall was unoccupied, and hurried into it, ready to unleashed. But I stopped myself much to my gurgling stomach and quaking bowels’ anger. There was no toilet paper! It seemed it had been all used up. Fuck! I held my gut and stepped out of the stall. I noticed Jayson, my preppy co-worker in the next stall, his gray pinstriped pants and bright blue briefs around his ankles. He was pushing out a monsterous shit that splattered against the toilet bowl as he grunted. There was no way he was getting up anytime soon.

Ughhh. I had been holding my shit in for so long and I knew that I needed to empty my bowls soon. I had another meeting scheduled and if I didn’t find a toilet to take a shit in, I wasn’t sure I would be able to make it through the meeting without crapping myself. I hurried upstairs to see if that bathroom was free, walking as fast as I could while clenching the hell out of my cheeks. Only to get to the bathroom and find that’s stalls were out of order. I could hear my stomach gurgling and my asshole was pulsing, ready to push my massive load out. I needs to find another bathroom NOW!

I ran out of the men’s and rounded the corner and spotted the Executive’s Bathroom, a private bathroom that is for single use for the higher ups. I hesitated but a bubbling sound and cramp that made me hug my midsection decide for me as I all but ran inside and close tube door, locking it and fumbled with my belt, yanking down my pants and my blue and white briefs to my knees as I mounted that porcelain seat. Instantly I let go and my bowels erupted.

Long soft mushy logs of shit blasted out of me, not quite diarrhea, but definitely a shitload. My eyes rolled in the back of my head as I farted into the bowl, the logs crackling as they broke atop one another and filling the bowl. I probably sat there continuously shitting for about five minutes, my bowels and stomach emptying. When I was done I wiped and went to flush the toilet.

Only it didn’t flush. I started to panic, jiggling the handle desperately, trying to get it to do anything, but nothing worked. My massive bubbling soup of sewage had filled the toilet and the toilet wouldn’t flush. I had no cool what to do, and I didn’t want to get in trouble for using the Executive’s Bathroon so I just washed my hands and… uh… left.

The coast was clear in the hall so I just went back about my day, pretending like nothing had happened.

Hopefully no one finds out.

#toilet #malediarrhea #malepoop #malepoopdesperation #poop desperation

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bird-inacage · 1 year

Text

Love in the Air: At the Mercy of Love (Sky x Prapai Confession Scene)

So the confession scene is easily one of the most important and pivotal scenes in Sky x Prapai’s storyline, and I have a lot to say about it. This scene left me quaking because it’s very, very layered. I’ve had to delve deep to truly try to understand the emotional perspectives of both characters in this moment.

From Prapai’s point of view, Sky has just attempted to ruthlessly hurt him, which was incredibly out of character. Prapai knows this isn’t his Sky. Knows Sky wouldn’t say and do things like that, but he doesn’t understand why Sky is saying this. And Sky is a person who comes with a lot of ‘whys’ that Prapai doesn’t yet have all the answers to. He decides not give up, because his love and concern for Sky far outweighs his own pain.

I’ve tried picturing how Prapai felt when he read those words in Sky’s notebook. The first few pages are sweet and endearing, Sky’s notes begin purely as a record of facts. Slowly those become more telling, more revealing in how much Sky values Prapai’s presence, but also how much good he sees in Prapai.

Up until this point, Prapai has been putting his everything into pursuing Sky, in the hopes that Sky may at some point reciprocate even a fraction. Even in the previous episode, when Prapai gets angry, he says, “I might be a psychotic stalker in your eyes, but please understand how worried I am of you”. Despite how assured he comes across, Prapai is actually very insecure about how Sky feels about him. He has no real grasp on Sky’s true feelings. Though he suspects Sky returns them, he doesn’t actually know for sure. Sky’s notes reveal that he’s taken note of every gesture, every act of devotion that Prapai has made thus far. Nothing Prapai has done has gone unnoticed.

Prapai must have felt overwhelmingly validated and touched, that the person he loves has equally treasured every single moment of his presence. All the effort, all the time he has poured into Sky, has been seen, and is absolutely worth it. But Sky wanted to keep all this hidden. He didn’t want Prapai to know. And that fact was likely going round and round in circles in Prapai’s mind, whilst he sat there in the dark - stewing, and getting increasingly angry and hurt by the entire revelation.

Which leads onto the part which devastated me. Sky insecurities, fears and anxieties laid raw and utterly unfiltered in excruciating, heart-breaking detail. Sky’s complete sense of worthlessness couldn’t be any clearer. Prapai knows there’s a shadow chasing Sky but he still doesn’t know what that shadow is. He loves Sky but Sky doesn’t love himself, and you can’t simply re-programme someone’s mindset like a switch. It doesn’t matter how much you love someone, that isn’t enough to convince them to love themselves as much as you do. Sky truly doesn’t feel worthy of Prapai’s affections, and so that entire final passage is Sky pleading, bargaining for Prapai’s attentions to stay with him. It’s the most agonised, distraught, desperate cry for someone to stay and not abandon him.

Sky is so determined to project a strong façade. To have his worst fears being read out to him by the man he loves, the man he thinks no longer wants him anymore - is like hearing the taunting voice of his demons being actualised through Prapai. An echo of what I assume his ex intentionally may have done to mentally torture him. This whole exchange proves to be downright unbearable for Sky, because his attempt to maintain any semblance of control or strength is utterly shattered. The only thing he could withhold from Prapai were his true feelings, in order to protect himself. Now Prapai knows everything. Utterly everything. He’s completely at Prapai’s mercy. And he promised himself he would never let that happen again. Sky, who is overcome by a vision of his worst hell, can only dread what comes next, that Prapai could use his fears as further fuel to hurt him.

Now my interpretation of Prapai’s response is that he is fundamentally still fuelled by anger (again out of concern and heartbreak for Sky). The tone he uses throughout is absolute admonishment, ‘You really thought that you could be the bad guy? You? Who were you trying to fool? Why were you trying to make yourself out to be the worst when I know you’re not? Why would you even try to get me to hate you, resent you, be angry at you?’ The fact that Sky even attempted to turn Prapai against him, to save himself from actually seeing Prapai do it of his own volition, is again a huge sign of self-sabotage.

We’ve seen Sky do this before. He’d rather try to hasten what he considers is the inevitable, taking the choice and control out of the other person’s hands. So yes, understandably Prapai is furious. He’s so helplessly angry because Sky tried to stop him from having any say, to stop him from having any choice in the matter. Sky jumped the gun and cut him off, and to top it off, tried to make Prapai completely hate him for it. To Prapai, what dealt the biggest blow, what was potentially the most hurtful, the one thing he could not accept - is even if Sky truly didn’t want him anymore, he has no right to take away Prapai’s love for him. ‘Don’t you dare try to make me hate you, when you have no idea just how much I love you. You are not allowed to take that away from me. You have no idea how utterly impossible that would be.’

Along with Prapai’s anger, is also fear. The thought that he may have never known, never heard these thoughts and feelings. The thought that he may have never found out, or been willingly told by Sky himself, had he not come across the notebook. Knowing what he could have lost, missed, passed by, had he not decided to persist. That Sky was going to take away his right to know. And the anger, pain and frustration at the thought that Sky would keep that from him. That one thing he values above all right now, which is Sky’s love.

Within Prapai’s tone, there’s also a degree of, ‘Why would you do this to yourself? How could you be so cruel to yourself? Do you even know how you sound? Why?’ Prapai hates the fact that Sky keeps bringing himself down. Sky’s self-esteem is already sitting at rock bottom and for some reason Sky (being his own worst enemy) only continues to reinforce this. I think Prapai reading out every word was a way of hitting it home to Sky, that there’s no way on this earth that he could ever convince Prapai or anyone else that he doesn’t care. Because someone so broken, so insecure, so desperate of love - someone who wrote those words, thought those words, could never.

I also believe Prapai’s hurt here stems from annoyance at himself. Annoyance that he ever, even if for one second entertained any doubt. That he ever thought badly of Sky, because this, THIS, is stone cold proof that Sky could never do anything capable of hurting him. Every word in that notebook is probably like a stab in the heart. And perhaps Prapai reading it out loud was to remind himself that he shoulders the blame. For not being able to get through to Sky, for not being able to be everything Sky needs.

Now, I think the almost interrogative way that Prapai reads the notebook whilst Sky breaks down is an attempt to tear down every wall and façade that Sky has remaining. We could see this as an act of ‘tough love’. Prapai has tried coaxing, and soothing, and being soft and gentle with Sky. But maybe the anger in this particular moment led him to try being blunt for once. Prapai so desperately wants Sky to be completely unshackled, unburdened, stripped down to his most basic fundamental. The Sky he was before all the pain was inflicted on him. The Sky underneath it all who wants him and loves him. The instant Sky confesses, Prapai’s face immediately smooths over like he’s finally gotten through. There’s an instant register of relief like ‘there it is, there you are.’

I feel like the purpose of this scene was to be a moment of catharsis for both characters. As much as I do feel Prapai went in pretty hard, I also recognise that he’s been dealing with a lot of pent up frustration, fear and worry, that he hasn’t been able to direct anywhere. And to the man’s credit, he has been incredibly patient and understanding with Sky thus far. He refuses to let any of it out on Sky, so all of that worry has been kept largely to himself. The revelation of Sky’s true feelings just unleashed all that coiled up tension. For both of them actually.

To date a person who is dealing with severe trauma is not for the faint-hearted. I’m really glad this was addressed, because trauma may manifest as instances of misunderstanding or miscommunication, that will inevitably cause issues, disagreements, and possibly fall outs in the relationship. Sky will always be prone to think and assume the worst. All those fears don’t just go away as soon as you’re in love. Their relationship is going to be a real challenge, there’s no skirting around that. I do think this was a great dose of reality for Prapai, because this was the first real instance where Sky’s demons have manifested into an actual obstacle. Before that, Prapai has always been pretty steadfast and unfaltering. This completely hit him out of left field, and he realised that yes, he can be shaken too. He’s not invincible. He can also be subject to doubt, hurt, and anger.

What I am really appreciative of is that this scene acted almost like a reset. It allowed them to be completely honest and laid bare. Now there’s no question to be had how they feel about one another. And that’s a good place to move forward from.

#LITA #love in the air #love in the air series #love in the air episode 12 #LITA meta #LITA analysis #prapaisky #paisky #prapai x sky #sky x prapai #this scene was delivering the feels HARD #such a different way of approaching a confession scene

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lilylollipops · 6 months

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could you write something fem!reader x lily evans where reader and james grow up together and are best friends but reader has a crush on lily and james tells her about his feelings for lily and begins his whole declaring his love for her all around the school and reader has to keep her feelings secret because she doesn’t want to hurt james and doesn’t know if lily likes girls or not?

you can decide whether lily reciprocates readers feelings or not i don’t mind either way, it can be angst and/or fluff 🙂

thanks 🙏🦀

absolutely loved this request! battled insane writer’s block but here it is! thank you for waiting patiently my lovelies! <333

pairings: lily evans x reader, james potter x reader (platonic), marauders x reader (platonic)

warnings: unreciprocated feelings (james and lily), misunderstandings (very brief!!), coming out, purposeful lowercase, she/her pronouns used for reader, no (y/n)

james was my best friend and i’d never have it any other way—not that i’d ever have a choice. our parents were best friends and so we had been too, ever since we were in diapers. so when we got on the hogwarts express together, we promised that we’d stick together no matter what. and we have, along with sirius, remus, and peter. they’re like my second family.

so you can imagine how conflicted i felt when lily evans entered the picture. from the second i laid eyes on her, i knew she was gonna ruin me. her red hair that always perfectly framed her face, her piercing green eyes, and her heart stopping smile. lily evans was my dream girl.

but, apparently, james and i shared not only everything else in our lives, but also our taste in girls because the moment he saw her, he fell in love. we sat at the gryffindor table with our new friends when suddenly james pointed down the table. “look! do you all see her?”

sirius, remus, peter, and i craned our heads to get a good look. i smiled, seeing the girl i had run into earlier on the train. she was really nice and had pointed to me to where we’re supposed to change after complimenting my necklace. i did my best not to blush now that i had sighted her again. “i’m gonna marry her one day!” james declared. i did my best to laugh along with the boys as i felt my heart—which had been leaping a moment ago—now breaking.

still, james saw right through me. “hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, placing a gentle hand on my shoulder. “oh, uh, nothing just a hair in my treacle tart.” i rushed out the first lie i could think of. the boys’ faces fell into disgust as they laughed at my misfortune. as they finally started settling down, i hoped this had been enough to change the subject. my hopes were quickly squashed as james excused himself to talk to the red headed girl.

i tried not to focus on their conversation, james being boisterous to try and keep her attention as she curtly introduced herself and began pointedly ignoring his attempts to flirt with her. i was so lost in thought that i had to be steered around by sirius as a prefect led us to the gryffindor common room. “are you alright?” he asked, leaning in close to my ear from behind me so that we wouldn’t disrupt everyone else. i nodded sharply, murmuring back, “just tired, long day.”

and with perfect timing, we were shown the way to boys and girls’ dorms. finally, the prefect dismissed us as he went off to join his friends at the chess table. i bade the boys good night, giving james an extra long hug, before making my way up the stairs. i froze when i saw the girl from before standing at the door, examining the names on the plaque. mine was on there. i gulped at the possibility that we’d be sharing a dorm for the next seven years. she spotted me as i inched forward, a friendly grin lighting up her face. “hi, you again! i’m lily and i suppose since you’re standing here, we’re going to be dorm mates!” she introduced herself excitedly.

i could practically feel my heart melting. i introduced myself in turn, my face flushing as she disregarded my offered hand to pull me into a hug. “sorry, you’re just one of the first friends i’ve made here. i’m really relieved to be sharing a room with someone i know.” lily said, tucking her hair behind her ear. i only smiled in response, so endeared by her that i could hardly breathe. together, we entered our dorm, and i couldn’t have even begun to fathom how troubling the next few years would be for me.

as the years progressed, i grew closer with both lily and the little group james and i had found, we now called ourselves the marauders. and james was still in love with lily.

when i would hang out with lily and our other friends, dorcas and marlene, it wasn’t long until james would come strutting over to attempt to woo her. anywhere you could possibly think of—studying in the library, relaxing under the trees on the grounds, laughing together in the common room. lily would roll her eyes, shoot a snide remark his way, and leave.

one day, it was just lily and i sitting under a willow on the grounds. her head rested in my lap as she read me a book by a muggle author called the picture of dorian gray. i was quite enjoying it and lily was happy to be able to have someone to talk to about her favorite books. i ran my hands carefully through her hair, watching as students milled about.

i couldn’t help the grimace that passed over my face when i saw the marauders coming our way, james in the lead. lately, it seemed like lily was more amused by him than anything else. she could even be labeled as receptive. as james’ best friend and pseudo wingwoman, giving him advice about things lily enjoyed and telling him not to make an idiot out of himself, i was thrilled at this progress. but as the girl in love with lily evans, perfect for me in all ways except for that she was more than likely straight, i was heartbroken.

i hadn’t noticed that my fingers stopped their motion until lily was frowning up at me. “everything okay up there?” she asked, moving her hand up to touch mine as she dropped her book open on her chest. “your boyfriend’s on his way.” i mumbled in a sing-song voice. i tried not to feel bitter as she giggled, sitting up and turning her head just as my boys arrived.

“hello boys.” i greeted with a grin. peter waved cheerfully, remus shot me a matching smile, and sirius winked at me from where his chin was perched on remus’ shoulder. james ruffled my hair and attempted to do the same to lily, but she swatted his hand away before he could. “hello my dearest lily, flower of my heart and light of life.” james greeted enthusiastically, dropping to his knees in front of her.

lily smiled and rolled her eyes, moving to sit crisscrossed and letting herself lean back into my chest. with a surprises blink, i moved my hand to rest on her arm and steady her. “hello james, my single most persistent nuisance.” she said with a teasing tone. my heart clenched in my chest and i tried to ignore the nudge peter gave remus, the looks the three shared as she reciprocated.

james smiled triumphantly, locking eyes with me as i gave him a subtle, approving nod. they began making small talk about classes, and remus (and sirius, who was apparently keen on staying attached to him) meandered closer to me to ask how the reading was going. we were in the middle of discussing the book when we were interrupted by james clapping his hands together. “so! as i’m sure you know, lily, this weekend is a hogsmeade trip.” james started.

“here we go.” peter muttered and lily hummed in acknowledgement. “well,” james continued confidently, “we’ve been getting along quite well lately, and i’d really like to get to know you better, so would you like to go to the three broomsticks? with me?” i smiled at him encouragingly, knowing that james really liked lily and really would treat her right. at least if i couldn’t be with her, my best friend would be happy with his dream girl and my dream girl would be happy with someone who loved her as she deserved.

i couldn’t see lily’s face, but my eyebrows shot up as she asked in a genuine tone, “like a date?” i watched james’ face light up as he looked around at all of us to make sure we were hearing this too. this was the first time lily had ever considered one of his proposals. james nodded carefully.

i felt more than heard lily’s sigh. “james, i’m sorry,” she started. we all glanced around at each other. while a rejection was definitely familiar, the genuine sympathy in her voice was foreign. “i can’t go out with you. it’s—god, i really thought you would’ve figured it out by now.” she sounded truly sympathetic and almost regretful. at james’ confused and sad puppy dog face, lily continued.

“i’m not interested—not just not in you, in any guy. i’m a lesbian.” my heart stopped at her words. i felt her tense against me, clearly worried for the reaction of those around us. james’ face had fallen, but he quickly smiled. he placed a gentle hand on her knee. “hey, that’s perfectly alright. i mean, i am a bit disappointed that you won’t be returning my feelings, but you’re cool. i’d like to keep being your friend, if that’s alright?” he asked. lily nodded quickly. “yes, that’s great. i find i actually quite like you when you aren’t trying to ask me out.” she said. i could hear the smile in her voice. james nodded once again and looked at me pleadingly.

i patted lily’s arm as james stood up, and she understood that i had to leave. the boys went ahead of me as i quickly kneeled and grasped her hand. “it was really brave of you and trust me, they’re all perfectly accepting. but i have to go, james—“

“he needs you.” she interrupted softly. i swallowed harshly and nodded. lily stared deeply into my eyes before mumbling, “i wish he could see what he’s had right in front of him this whole time. james would have never been so caught up on me if he had seen how you love him, how lucky he is to have your heart.” she gently tucked a strand of hair blowing in the breeze back behind my ear.

my jaw fell open and i laughed incredulously. “me? love him?” lily nodded, seeming confused at my response. “no, lily, it’s not—i’m like you. james has never been anything but a brother to me.” i rushed out. her eyes widened. “oh.” she breathed, eyes flicking down to my lips. i sat down fully again, closer to her than i’d been a moment before. “yeah, ‘oh.’”

lily’s fingers crept forward to meet mine, resting in the grass, before they climbed up further—up my arm, brushing my hair, resting on my shoulder. “i’ve wished to hear you say those words since our second year.” she giggled. i laughed in disbelief, and soon our foreheads were pressed together as we were both overcome by a fit of laughter. “well, i—i’ve been waiting since first year, since the train, so i believe that makes me the winner.”

lily gasped quietly and i grinned as she tried to compose herself. “the winner, hmm? i suppose that means you’ve earned a prize.” i stared down at her lips before forcing myself to look back into her intoxicating eyes. “i wouldn’t be opposed.” i whispered. lily hummed once more, her hand on my shoulder sliding to cradle the back of my neck as she leaned forward to press her lips to mine.

though i’d been waiting years for this moment, imagining and dreaming up how it would feel, i could’ve never imagined this. a warmth spread through me as our lips moved together in tandem. lily gently pulled me closer with an arm around my waist, and i angled her face to my liking with a gentle hand on her jaw. my brain felt like it was melting out of my ears as she lightly tugged my hair to get me closer. eventually, she pulled away, giggling breathlessly at my pout. “we do need air, you know.” she chastised lightheartedly. “who says?” i whined in response.

then, reality made its unwelcome return. “lily, i need to go to james. i’m sorry, i’ll be back, i promise. it’s just—”

“he’s your best friend. there’s nothing to apologize for, my love. i’ll be here, alright? no matter what. i’ve waited this long, what’s an hour or two more?” lily squeezed my hand in reassurance. i lunged forward to hug her, relishing in her enthused shriek as we tumbled over. “you may just be the best thing that’s ever happened to me, lily evans.” i declared quietly.

lily’s face erupted in a harsh blush and before she could reply, i pressed a last gentle kiss to her lips before sprinting off towards the castle.

dashing through the halls, i was given a wide berth and sympathetic looks; it seemed news of lily’s rejection had spread quickly. i skidded to a stop in front of the fat lady’s portrait, wheezing out the password under her concerned eye. “dear, are you quite sure everything’s alright?”

“yes, yes, please just let me in.” i begged through my gasping breaths. the portrait swung open and i maintained my quick pace until i was met with the door to the boys’ dorm. i knocked quickly and was almost immediately let in by peter. “thank god you’re here, james has been asking for you.” guilt struck deep in my chest as i tried to smile reassuringly at wormtail, knowing how he gets stressed in highly emotional situations.

“oh, don’t sound so relieved, wormy. we’ve got things all under control here!” sirius said, with a playful roll of his eyes. “yeah right.” james said, voice muffled as his head was smushed into his pillow. sirius shrugged from his place next to james on the bed, “alright, we’ve got it mostly under control then.”

remus sighed fondly, shaking his head and tugging sirius off the bed from behind him. “let the james whisperer work her magic.” i nodded in thanks before crawling up the bed to sit level with james’ shoulders. “talk to me, james.” i pleaded, rubbing his back soothingly. he pulled his face out of the pillow, resting it on my knee instead. “i just wish i would’ve known. i must’ve made her so uncomfortable and i’ve spent all this time on her when i never had a chance. i feel so stupid.” he sniffled, reaching up to wipe away a tear that had slipped. “oh james, you’re not stupid. you’ve just got the biggest heart of anyone i know. she’s not upset with you, okay? i promise. now you can move on, and i know that’s not what you’re thinking about right now, but it’s important to hear. there’s someone out there for you that will relish in your love and love you unconditionally in return. you’re gonna be alright, prongs.”

at these words, james’ eyes merely filled with more tears. he pushed himself up and flung his arms around me in a tight hug. i squeezed back just as fiercely, reaching to my fellow marauders to join. we all sat there together for a long while before we all disentangled from each other and lounged on the bed in a comfortable silence. remus tapped my head and i turned to look at him as he gestured to james. i stared in confusion. “tell him about lily. about how you feel for her.” he whispered to me. my eyes widened in shock. “how did you figure it out?” i hissed.

“you look at her the same way he does. the way i look at sirius.” he said with a gentle smile. i took a deep breath, remus squeezing my shoulder supportively, before i poked james for his attention.

“i have to tell you something. and i’m scared, but i think you deserve to know. all of you do.” at this, the rest of the marauders perked up and looked at me. “i, um… well, i like girls too.” there was a brief silence as i looked at my best friends, awaiting their reactions.

remus was the first to break the moment. “thank you for telling us, darling. i’m very proud of you.” he said clearly, reaching from behind to hug me around my shoulders. i sunk back into his embrace, squeezing his arms gratefully in return. sirius leapt up next, completely engulfing me and remus into a tight hug. “it all makes sense now! birds of a feather flock together, eh?” he cheered, ruffling my hair. i laughed, pushing him off.

peter merely shrugged. “i thought we all knew that already, but thank you for telling us.” my jaw dropped as i laughed in shock. he smiled sheepishly, grabbing my hand. my eyes landed on james, who was staring at me with a look i couldn’t discern. “james? is that… is that alright?” i mumbled nervously, playing with the hem of my jumper. “alright? oh, love, of course it is. come here.” he quickly replied, scooting closer to tug me into his arms. we began to rock gently back and forth.

“i was so scared, jamie.” i whispered into his shoulder as my eyes welled with tears. “it’s alright, it’s all okay now. you’re wonderful. don’t ever forget that. nothing to be scared of.” he cooed, going into mother mode. “i was scared because i loved lily too.” i rushed out, squeezing my eyes shut in fear of his response.

the rocking stopped. james didn’t seem to breathe for a moment. then, he pulled me somehow closer, his hand coming to hold the back of my head. “i’m so sorry. i’m so, so sorry.” he cried into my hair. “no, you’ve got nothing to apologize for, why are you sorry james?”

“you never did anything because of me. you didn’t have to give her up, love, i’m sorry.” i merely shook my head in response. i held no ill will towards james for my own decisions. he was my brother, and i’d give anything up to make him happy, even without him asking. suddenly, james lurched back, holding me at arms’ length. “you have to go to her now! she has to know how you feel!” i stared in confusion.

“come on, up!” james cried, pulling me to feet. “what are you on about?” i asked as sirius sprang up to pull me to the door. “you’ve got my blessing, now go tell lily how you feel!” james urged.

“are you sure? you love her—”

james interrupted me with a gentle hand over my mouth, “and i never had a chance. you might. she loves your company, i’ve never seen her look unhappy around you. and you love her too. you’ve given up all these years for my sake, now go be happy.” i grinned and swept james into a tight hug.

“thank you.” i whispered.

“thank me later.” james winked before shoving me out the door and following behind. i practically flew down the stairs, with the marauders all parading behind me and cheering me on. as i stepped into the common room, so did lily, entering through the portrait. she mumbled my name in something like wonder as i continued forward, stopping only when i was right in front of her and grasping her hands.

“hi.” we both said, and laughed at our synchronicity. i dropped one of her hands to cup her cheek with it. “hi.” i repeated. she laughed, winding an arm around my waist. “shut up.” she mumbled with a grin, before surging forward to once more press her lips to mine.

with the girl of my dreams holding me close and locking her lips to mine and the cheering of my closest friends in my ears, i figured things couldn’t get much more perfect than this.

#lily evans x reader #platonic james potter x reader #platonic marauders x reader

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chvnnie · 2 years

Note

Ok I’ve been thinking about the changbin hips part in maniac and how he puts his non mic hand behind him so that theres no obstruction from the pelvis and how the move right after makes the whole thing look like hes fucking you from behind and then slaps your ass

Thats it ive just been dealing with that visual since the release and im a mess because daddy dom changbin has been wearing on me for a while

hi!!! so sorry this took so long - i’ve been extra busy lately but this honestly has eaten me ALIVE since you sent it and i’m SO GLAD I FINALLY GOT TO FINISH IT. I REALLY HOPE YOU ENJOY

Dress

seo changbin x reader

word count: 2k

genre: fluff, smut - MINORS DNI

warnings: daddy dom!changbin, sub!reader, changbin’s thoughts are absolutely filthy, mentions of oral, teasing, dirty talk, unprotected sex (come on. just don’t), tears, they both fuck each other dumb, breeding kink, god they’re so in love. if i missed anything, PLEASE LET ME KNOW

a/n: my breeding kink has been through the roof lately and i’m making it everybody’s problem.

this is a work of fiction. this fic in no way represents seo changbin as a person or stray kids as a whole. you are responsible for the media you consume. please read responsibly.

It all started with a dress.

That stupid fucking dress.

It wasn’t like this dress was special, or even new. There was no reason for it to invoke such a reaction in Changbin, but it did.

When he saw you coming down the stairs in that white dress, the one with the puff sleeves and square neckline with a tie in the front, his heartbeat suddenly became very prominent in between his thighs. Changbin always thought you looked so pretty in it, but something about it tonight made his mind blank, unable to do anything but stare at you with a gaping mouth.

He didn’t have much time, nor the brain power, to consider why something you wore often had him feeling so primal, before you sat next to him on the couch. A hand resting on his knee, you leaned in and pressed a small kiss on the corner of his lip, lipgloss leaving a stain. On instinct, Changbin licked his lips to remove the gloss, and had to swallow the groan that threatened to release.

Strawberry. Fucking strawberry lipgloss that was shining under the cool light of the sitting room and made your lips look so delicious. His mind began to run with thoughts of how smooth they would feel against his, or how pretty they would look wrapped around his cock. The way the sticky texture of it would rub off on his shaft, feeling the skin tug as you bobbed your head up and down. Or the way it would look smeared across your face, mixed with drool and his cum after he finished all over your face.

Fuck, what were you doing to him?

You looked at your boyfriend, blinking with concern. “Everything alright, Binnie?”

Oh there you go again. Binnie. The way it rolled off your tongue would never not drive him insane. It just always sounded so good, especially when-

“Fine.” He responded, clearing his throat so you wouldn’t hear his voice waver. “You look stunning, honey.” Changbin leaned in, placing a small kiss on your hairline.

Add your scent to the list of things that were overwhelming him tonight. Clean linen mixed with the soft smell of roses and something that was purely you. God, it was incredible, the way you could do absolutely nothing and have Changbin slobbering all over you.

A smile graced your face, other hand reaching up to wipe the excess lipgloss off his lips. “You looked lost in your thoughts. Just wanted to make sure you were still here with me.”

He wasn’t. No, his mind was far, far away at the moment, imagining all the ways he wanted to take you tonight. Changbin gripped your wrist, keeping your hand on his face as he pressed a butterfly kiss to your thumb. You blushed at the action, letting your hand linger before slipping away.

The rest of the evening wasn’t any better. When he invited you on his family vacation, he didn’t think he’d be spending it chugging water at a nice restaurant to try and calm his body.

It was everything you did. The way you twisted the cloth napkin around your fingers during conversation, how you broke your bread off into tiny pieces before you took the bites, the way your skin would flush any time his parents spoke to you as if you two hadn’t been together for years at this point. Everything you did made resisting the urge to pick you up and throw you on the table harder.

Changbin didn’t know if he could contain himself much longer. Apparently, luck was on his side tonight. When the check came, his mother brought up their plans to grab ice cream and walk on the beach during sunset, extending the invitation to you and Changbin.

“I would love to, but I actually have a bit of a headache.” You answered before Changbin could even think of an excuse. “I’m so sorry, but I’ll have to pass.” You turned to your boyfriend, hand searching for his under the table. Finding it, you gave it a tight squeeze. “Don’t feel like you have to stay in because of me, Bin.”

Like he would even consider passing up an evening alone with you.

Upon entering the vacation home, it took Changbin forty five seconds to have you in your shared bedroom with the door locked, on all fours with your ass arched up, panties pulled down just enough to show off your dripping core.

Changbin kneeled behind you on the bed, fingers opening the lips of your pussy up to see more of you. He leaned in, licking a slow stripe down the center of your silt. Your thighs shook as he took his time, tasting every inch of you.

“So sweet, baby girl.” He blew on your core, the cool air making your skin goosebump. “I love the way you taste.”

You whined, pushing your hips back to feel more of his mouth on you.

Typically, he’d entertain your bratty actions, smiling as he put you back in your place. Tonight, however, after the way you riled him up, Changbin was having none of it.

The sound of his hand colliding with your right cheek echoed in the room. He spanked you again, this time with enough force to jolt you forward.

“Stay still or I won’t fuck you at all tonight.” Changbin growled, knowing it was a lie. Every second outside of your cunt was pure agony. “You don’t get to be needy tonight. You’ll take whatever I give you, and fucking thank me for it. Do you understand?”

His hand cupped your cheek, readying himself to spank you yet again if your response wasn’t to his satisfaction.

Instead, you turned your head, wide puppy eyes meeting his lust blown ones. “Yes, daddy. Thank you daddy.”

Changbin smirked, hand rubbing the handprint he left on you while the other was busy caressing your clit. “Always such a good girl for me, aren’t you, baby?”

A gasp fell from your lips, whimpers close behind it. “Yes, daddy.”

He hummed as he continued to slowly toy with your clit, enjoying the way you were already squirming from his touch. His thumb began to rub your entrance, teasing gently before shoving just the tip of it inside you. Your elbows gave out, now resting your cheek on your mattress as Changbin teased you.

“Daddy, please.” Your whines were so pathetic, but so pretty. Just like you. “Want your cock in me.”

“You do?” His coos were condescending, thumb fucking you at a snail’s pace. He wanted to continue on with his teasing, he truly did, but then he heard the way you sniffled when you whined, and Changbin decided that you, and his cock, had had enough. “You know daddy can never say no to you.”

A cry of relief left your mouth as Changbin moved away. Cock aligned with your heat, he pushed in slowly, the feeling of your tight walls squeezing him going straight to his head. Once he was completely in you, only then did he pull out, hips moving in circles as he fucked you slowly.

Your hands gripped the comforter, moaning as he continued the circular movements. Something about the way he moved was making you melt, dissolving into nothing below him.

But it wasn’t enough. The movement of his hips was wonderful, letting you feel every inch of him and the way he stretched you out was divine. If only he would fuck you a little bit faster, a little bit harder-

You looked behind you. Changbin had both hands on your ass, spreading you open to watch. His was in a trance, eyes fixed on where the two of you met, teeth tugging his bottom lip in. He was gone, brain completely focused on how much he loved being buried inside you.

The best thing about Changbin is when he fucks you, he fucks you both dumb.

“Daddy?” You meekly whispered, making puppy eyes at him. He looked at you, taking in your expression and the tremble of your lip, little whines slipping through.

You didn’t need to say anything else.

He smiled wickedly, one hand moving off of your ass as the other held you steady. “Of course, I forgot.” The rotation of his hips stayed the same, but the pace changed suddenly, speeding up and ramming into you. “Baby needs daddy to fuck her like a whore.”

You threw your head back, moans turning into screams as Changbin fucked you harder. His thrusts, while fast and rough, were calm and thorough. He wanted you to feel every inch of him, wanted you to feel just as good as he did.

“You’re so-“ hard thrust “-fucking-“ even harder “-filthy, baby.” He accentuated the last bit with a firm smack on your behind, the hit making your body vibrate. “Just having my cock is never enough, huh? Always need more and more of me.” The next sentence fell from his lips without much thought, but after Changbin said it, he felt his entire body shiver, goosebumps covering every bit of exposed skin.

“Just won’t stop until daddy fucks a baby into you, will you? Fine then, fucking take it.”

Changbin pulled out of you, and before you could protest, he flipped you over, throwing your legs over his shoulders and slammed his cock inside you. His thrusts were harder this time, nails digging into your hips as he held you still. Your hands grabbed his hair, pulling him down for a kiss.

He didn’t stop. He wouldn’t fucking stop until he was sure you were so full of him that you were leaking. Never have your kisses tasted so good, never have you squeezed him so tight, never have you made Changbin so fucking dumb, he was surprised he had any brain function left.

A particularly hard thrust made you break the kiss, head thrown back as you cried out for him.

“Bin-bin. I-“ you could barely speak, the sensations overwhelming you. “Ba-Baby been good? Baby cum?”

Changbin stared at you, and found himself lost. Your smeared lipgloss. Your mascara stained cheeks. Your wide, empty eyes that were staring into his. The scent of roses and taste of strawberries warming him up and make him melt.

He was never really sure love existed, not to this extent at least, until he met you. Until he fell for you. Maybe that’s why a simple dress made Changbin so insane - because it was you who wore it, and there was no one he would rather be with, no one he would rather spend his life with or do everything with other than you.

It’s always been you. It will always be you.

Changbin slowed down slightly, hand coming up to cup your face. He stroked your cheek with his thumb, the softest smile painting his face. “Baby’s been so good for daddy.” He whispered, voice shaking with his impending orgasm and the tears filling his eyes. The kiss he pressed on your nose was so sweet, so gentle that it made you cry. You were as broken as Changbin was. “Please look at me. Look at me while we cum together. I want to remember how pretty you look when I give you my babies.”

You did look at him. Neither of you even dared to blink as you both reached your climax, Changbin pumping into you well after he emptied out. Just to be sure. Just to be safe.

He pulled his softening cock out, you wincing at the sudden emptiness. Exhaustion took over and Changbin fell on top of you, resting his head on your collar bones. The two of you laid there in silence, listening to the sounds of each other’s breaths and heartbeats.

Your legs wrapped around his hips, pulling him closer until his body was completely pressed against yours. “I love you, Changbin.” You whispered so soft, so gently that the words threatened to evaporate in the air.

It was then that Changbin began to cry. Body shaking, hot tears pooling on the shoulder of your dress, he sobbed into you.

A love this pure shouldn’t exist. It was too innocent for this world, for anyone to feel, let alone him. But you chose him; you loved him like that, even if he didn’t deserve it. Your love for him was so untainted, so spotless and perfect. He wasn’t worthy of it, and never thought he would be, but he would spend all of eternity trying to be a man worthy of your love.

taglist: @lix-ables

#skz smut #stray kids smut #seo changbin smut #changbin smut #skz hard thoughts #skz drabbles #chvnnie requests #seo changbin fluff #changbin fluff

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