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garlichoisan · 3 years

Text

Singing in the shower | liu yangyang

➸ Genre: Fluff

➸ Pairing: Yangyang × f reader

➸ Word count: 7 197

➸ Information:

college!au, childhood friends, friends to lovers, friends!NCT Dream 00 line, bestfriend!Yeji (ITZY), very slight NoMin references (Jeno + Jaemin), mention of Mark Lee, reader is a few months older than YangYang (born in the same year)

➸ Warnings: A lot of fluff as usual.

➸ Plot:

You're forced to learn how to live without your closest friend from childhood who has to go live in Germany with his parents, leaving you heartbroken. You thought YangYang was going to be by your side forever. As years have passed and you've almost started to forget about him, he suddenly appears in your life again, turning it upside down, and this time, nobody's leaving.

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➸ A/N: This oneshot took me over 2 months and a half to write and was written as a part of my dear @renjunniehome's song fic challenge (?)

Not really a challenge, but it's an event where diffent NCT writers write fanfics based on songs so make sure to check it here: PLAYLIST FICS MASTERLIST

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“I don't know, it's just something about ya

Got me feeling like I can't be without ya

Anytime someone mention your name

I be feeling as if I'm around ya”

YangYang and you have always been a package deal; you were so close as children that at one point people couldn’t imagine one of you without the other and honestly, you also couldn’t imagine what your life would be without your best friend. There was something about him that made you feel butterflies in your stomach, even though as a child you could not identify and understand clearly what it was.

Besides that, your parents and YangYang’s were very close so you sometimes had family dinners together; that happened often, since you were neighbors and your houses were literally right next to each other. Your parents loved YangYang like their own son, maybe because he spent so much time in your house, had dinner there, and even stayed the night quite often for your sleepover parties. Of course, his parents were also very happy when you went to his house in order to spend time with him. Everyone in the neighborhood thought you’d end up marrying each other when you grow up, even if your child selves denied it with disgust. However, you couldn’t deny that your face always lit up when your parents told you YangYang and his parents would be coming over for dinner. Just the mention of his name made you start jumping with excitement.

But apparently everything good had to end sooner or later. You could still remember the shock you felt when you learnt YangYang would be leaving his house which was right next to yours in order to go live and study in Germany. He explained with glossy eyes that his parents have found better work opportunities there and that this probably meant you wouldn’t see each other very often. When you first heard this, you burst out crying, hugging him tightly, begging him not to go. Even though he also didn’t want to go, he was just a child so he had to leave with his parents. That left you heartbroken; you tried to text him in the beginning in order to keep in touch but it was getting difficult because of the time difference, as well as the lack of personal contact. Slowly you started to get used to life without him, no matter how much you wanted him back, but you couldn’t really learn to be happy without him.

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“Ain't no words to describe you baby

All I know is that you take me high

Can you tell that you drive me crazy?

'Cause I can't get you out my mind”

As the years were passing and you were growing up, you started to understand what your feelings for your childhood friend meant. Before you heard the word “crush”, you thought you just loved to be next to YangYang because he was funny and was making you laugh. But as a teenager, you realized you still missed him, even though you had no idea what he looked like now, how much he had changed, and most of all, you felt how you haven’t gotten over him at all. People your age started to date, but you weren’t interested in anyone, since subconsciously you kept comparing them to your childhood friend. You never even went to dates, and you realized how childish your behavior was, but honestly, nobody seemed like your type anyways. You barely had any friends, since the overly-romanticized idea of YangYang has turned into a standard for your friendships as well. You felt as if you were going crazy because of him as you only thought of him and how you would feel if you could meet him now.

* * *

A few years have passed and you were now in university, trying to live without the thought of YangYang as you realized you were probably never going to meet him again. Now you had some amazing friends who were bringing colors into your life and sometimes distracted you from thoughts about your childhood friend.

You were currently having lunch with your friends from your class. Suddenly you saw Jaemin, one of your friends, running towards your table and finding a place to sit, as he looked as if he was excited for some reason.

"Guys, big news! Apparently we're gonna have a new guy in our class. I heard he's German. I can't wait to meet him! European peopleare so good-looking!" Jaemin said with a dreamy gaze.

“Why would there be a German in our class?” You asked confusedly.

“I don’t know, that’s what the rumors are.”

As you heard the word ‘German’, you suddenly thought of YangYang again, trying to stop the association in your mind before it was too late. For the rest of lunch time you were a lot more silent than usual, quietly eating your food as Haechan was telling jokes, Renjun was laughing, and Jaemin kept annoying Jeno.

The next day you had an early class and as you heard your alarm ring, you groaned softly in annoyance, turning it off and literally rolling out of bed, as you fell to the floor, hugging your blanket, together with your bunny plushie which was actually a present from YangYang.

“Stop overreacting, you drama queen. Nobody has ever died from early morning classes,” your roommate and best friend, Yeji, said.

Sometimes you wondered how could she be so energetic, enthusiastic and optimistic, even early in the morning.

“Yeah, I might be the first one though,” you cried out, while holding the plushie tightly, refusing to accept the reality.

“Come on, if you get up now, I’ll buy you something delicious after classes,” Yeji promised, taking your hand to help you get to your feet.

When you heard her offer, your eyes lit up.

“Really?” You were still a little skeptical about believing her, even though you wanted to.

“Yes, knowing you, you’re probably just going to ask me to buy you a chocolate. Completely affordable,” Yeji chuckled, knowing she was right.

“Correct. Make it two, though. I feel this is going to be a difficult day.”

You finally took her hand and let her help you get up from the floor. After that you quickly put your plushie back in your bed, laying its head on your pillow, as you took the blankets from the floor and put them over the plushie, wanting it to feel warm. Yeji watched your actions with a wide smile on her face.

“Aww, you’re so cute. Now go get ready, or we’ll gonna be late.”

“Oh, how tragic that would be,” you said sarcastically, before going to the bathroom to wash your face and brush your teeth.

* * *

When you and Yeji entered the lecture hall, you found your classmates being more energetic and chattier than usual. You also noticed your friends, who were talking to a new guy, probably the one Jaemin mentioned the day before, as you recalled.

“Honestly I was a little disappointed to find out you weren’t actually German,” you heard Jaemin say and you giggled quietly.

“If those weird comments don’t scare the new guy off, I’d be really impressed,” Yeji noted, as she found a place near the window and you sat next to her.

“I agree,” you laughed, turning around to look at the new guy once again.

He looked somehow familiar to you, but you couldn’t tell why. When he noticed you looking at him he just stared at you for a couple of seconds while Jaemin and the rest of your friends were probably bothering him. You could swear you’ve seen those shiny dark brown eyes somewhere else before. But as you realized you were still looking at the guy, you quickly averted your eyes, so that he wouldn’t think you were some kind of a creep. You thought that maybe there was not a particular reason for his familiar vibe: maybe he just looked like somebody you’d befriend, that’s why he looked as if you already knew him, or at least that’s what you believed.

“I see the new guy has already caught your eye. The question is, how did he achieve that? You’re not usually interested in others,” Yeji pointed out.

“I-I’m not looking at him,” you denied, shaking your head. “Guys are basically a loss of time, except for my friends. But they’re too dumb for me to date one of them. Besides, only two of them are boyfriend material, they are Jaemin and Jeno, and they’re basically almost dating each other, even though they don’t know it yet,” you explained, taking your textbook out.

As you mentioned Jeno, you saw him coming to you and you looked at him questioningly.

“We promised to show the new guy around after this class, and then we’re going to have lunch with him. You and Yeji can also join us,” Jeno suggested and Yeji nodded.

“We’d love to!” You smiled and Jeno smiled back, returning to his seat, next to Jaemin.

When English class ended, you and Yeji went out of the lecture hall, waiting for your friends and the new guy. They were soon here and you all started walking around the hall, as you heard Haechan talking about the variety of books in the university’s library even though you’ve never seen him actually go there, so you were wondering how he knew this information. Meanwhile you and the new guy continued looking at each other and then averting your gaze without saying anything. You realized he still hasn’t introduced himself to you, but you couldn’t ask him for his name, because you were shy, so you just continued walking in silence, as the ones who were talking were mainly Haechan and Renjun.

When you went to the cafeteria and found a table, you left your things, so that the guys could watch over them, and you went to buy food with Yeji.

“Seriously, what’s going on between you and the new guy? You can’t stop looking at each other. You’ve never looked at a guy like that, so you can’t convince me you don’t like him,” Yeji stated, demanding an answer, as she took a bowl of rice.

“He just looks familiar, I don’t know why though. That’s all.”

“You know that when you meet your soulmate for the first time, you feel as if you already know each other?” Yeji asked, as you paid for your food and started walking back to the table with your best friend walking after you.

“Shut up,” you hit her arm playfully; you really wanted her to stop saying things like that.

When you went back to the table, you noticed only Jaemin and Jeno were there. Jaemin was feeding Jeno, holding a spoon of rice which he put into his mouth.

“Eat a lot, handsome,” Jaemin winked at Jeno who averted his head with discontent. “Do you want some kimchi?” He asked, as Jeno nodded, even though he didn’t want his best friend to feed him.

“Why are you feeding him? Can he not hold the utensils himself?” Yeji asked, as you hit her arm again.

“Be quiet, you’re ruining the romance,” you scolded her, as you continued looking at your two friends, as you sat across from them.

“What romance are you talking about, I just lost a bet,” Jeno groaned in disagreement with your statement.

“Was the bet letting Jaemin show his love for you freely?” You questioned him, as Jeno looked too flustered to answer.

“Something like that,” Jaemin confirmed. “Ah, Jeno, you’re such a messy eater! Here, let me wipe that off,” he said, as he wiped the rice off Jeno’s lips, using a tissue.

“Cute,” you whispered, looking away as you started eating your own lunch.

“Jaemin’s actions are making me want to throw up,” Yeji confessed, taking her fork and starting to eat her food in silence.

“You’re not the only one, I feel the same way,” Jeno agreed quietly, looking at Jaemin as if he was going to kill him every second now.

A few minutes later the new guy approached your table, holding his own tray of food, setting it down and sitting next to you. Your heart skipped a beat just because of his decision to sit next to you. You didn’t know why him being close to you was making you feel this special, so you tried to brush it off, but you couldn’t; so during the rest of the lunch you were actually in a very good mood, even though you and the new guy still haven’t talked to each other directly at all. When Haechan and Renjun joined you, you talked to them a lot, trying not to think about the stranger next to you, since you were too shy to ask for his name, and he apparently didn’t want to say it to you or ask you about yours.

As you were done with lunch, you stood up from the table and took your tray in your hands, looking at the new guy as he was doing the same. When he took his own tray, though, you noticed he dropped something. You quickly bent down to get it and give it back to its owner. But before handing it to him, you took a quick look at it – it was a discount card for the food in the cafeteria. You saw his picture and you read your name, saying it out loud as you realized something.

“Yang… Yang?” You looked up in disbelief.

He looked at you with a smile and he nodded.

“Yes, YangYang is my name, not a nickname as people usually think. Sorry for not introducing myself to you earlier, I was just distracted since you seemed really familiar for some reason,” he said, as you handed him his discount card.

“Um, I… My name is Y/N,” you introduced yourself quietly, as you waited for his reaction.

There were two possible ways this could go: he would either recognize his own childhood best friend, or he would take your hand, as he hears your name for the first time, if he wasn’t your YangYang, but some other guy with the same name. But to you, now it all made sense. The visual resemblance, his voice, his cheerful personality… But you still wanted to be sure it was actually him, before hugging him excitedly.

“You… Bunny?” He called you by your nickname he came up with when you were younger. He thought you looked energetic and playful, just like a bunny.

You nodded, as you couldn’t stop smiling.

“You don’t know how much I missed you!”

Before you could do anything, he put his tray and card down on the table as he hugged you tightly. You were a little taken aback for a couple of seconds, slowly realizing your wish has come true. You and your best friend were finally together.

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“Thinkin' of ya when I'm goin' to bed

When I wake up think of ya again

You are my homie, lover and friend

Exactly why”

As you and Yeji went back to the dorms, you didn’t even have any motivation to study, because you were too busy thinking about your amazing day. You still couldn’t believe this was actually him, your childhood best friend who you were meeting so many years after he left for Germany, after you had lost hope of seeing him ever again. You were hugging your plushie, as you were jumping around the room, repeating that tomorrow you were meeting YangYang after classes in a café, where you could talk to each other and get updates on his life, even though everything seemed as if it was still the same; even YangYang haven’t changed in your opinion, except for becoming more handsome now as an adult.

Yeji was smiling at you, as you told her about your long story with your childhood friend. She was sincerely happy to see you so excited and she wished everything would turn out well for you. You kept thinking about him before going to bed and even after you woke up, starting your day with a smile on your face.

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“You light me up inside

Like the 4th of July

Whenever you’rearound

I always seem to smile”

A few weeks have passed since your reunion with YangYang; now you were used to hanging out together all the time, just like before, realizing that neither of you really changed. You craved each other’s attention and presence just the same way as when you were kids. Today you decided to visit a café with a nice atmosphere, suitable for a cozy afternoon and long conversations. After classes were over, you said goodbye to Yeji, as she wished you to have a good time on your date, but you were quick to correct her this wasn’t a date (even though you secretly wanted it to be) and went out of the classroom together with YangYang.

On the way to the café you couldn’t stop talking to each other. Your topics were never ending and it was always exciting spending time together for both of you. You couldn’t stop smiling as he said funny things to you, or even when he didn’t say something that entertaining; you just loved his company so much, that you enjoyed every second you spent with him. Around twenty minutes later you got to your destination and he opened the door to the café for you, then you found a nice table near the window. You both ordered hot chocolate as you continued with your conversation.

“Do you wanna go watch a movie tomorrow? They’re projecting a Marvel movie,” YangYang asked as he gave you a little additional information.

You smiled, even though you honestly disliked these movies, but you only watched them so that you could spend time with YangYang. You’ve watched every single Marvel movie, since your best friend was obsessed with them for some reason.

“Of course, I’m so excited!”

“Great, I’ll book the movie tickets now,” YangYang said with a wide smile on his face, as he unlocked his phone and typed the website’s name to book the tickets.

“Um, Yangie,” you hesitantly started speaking, not knowing if you should continue your sentence.

“Yeah?” He asked, not looking away from his phone.

“I’m going home this weekend, in my hometown. Do you wanna go with me?” You suggested, even though you felt a little shy to be inviting your childhood friend in your house and have the same sleepovers you used to.

“Really? That would be amazing!” Fortunately, he seemed really happy to hear your idea. “Your parents are also going to be there, right?” After you nodded, he continued speaking. “Can you tell your mom to please prepare my favorite cream cheese muffins for her special guest?” He looked at you with pleading eyes you could never say no to.

“Hey, YangYang! Do you only care about food?” You scolded him, as you playfully hit his arm.

“This is my main priority, yes.” He answered, matching your energy. “But you take the second place, you’re the second most important thing to me other than food.”

He looked at you and for a moment you forgot how to breathe. You were looking at his eyes, getting lost again and again; it felt like you were getting out of the trance he put you on, only to fall deeper the next time you looked at him.

“Are you okay?”

His voice showed concern, but his face had a unreadable look; not worried, but also not calm. It was like he knew exactly how he made you feel.

“Uh, yes, sorry, I just zoned out for a second,” you explained as you avoided his gaze. “I’m gonna call my mom later and ask her to prepare the muffins,” you informed him, as you took a sip from your hot chocolate.

“You know I don’t really care, right? I just want to be with you,” he admitted, as you coughed when you heard that. “Are you alright? First you zoned out, now you can’t drink your hot chocolate… So my theory must be true,” he said with a content tone and you looked at him in surprise.

“What theory?” You asked as you continued coughing until you were okay.

“Never mind. Just be careful next time.”

You nodded as you silently took another sip, trying to avoid his eyes.

Around an hour later it was time for you to leave, so you went back to the dorms. He smiled and waved at you, and after you waved back, you finally entered the room you and Yeji shared. You closed the door as you rested your back on it, breathing loudly. Your heart was beating fast and you wanted to make sure you’ve calmed down before you greet Yeji. Now you were absolutely sure you were in love with your childhood best friend and that fact made you quite nervous. You never felt that way before and you weren’t even sure if he felt the same way about you. But despite your worries, you smiled widely before knowing it. You felt like you couldn’t even control your emotions and it made you very confused. You slowly went to your room, then you left your bag on your chair and you took a step towards your bed and you just laid on it for a minute, staring at the ceiling, trying to stop thinking about YangYang, but it was more difficult than you expected.

“What’s wrong? Didn’t the date with YangYang go well?” She teased you and you turned to look at her, rolling your eyes with annoyance.

“It was nice, except it weren’t a date,” you corrected her, sighing loudly. “But why is my heart being like that?” you whispered, putting your head on your heart as you kept looking at the ceiling with concentration, as if you expected to find all the answers of your questions there.

“Maybe because you wanted it to be a date?”

You decided to ignore her, but then she spoke again.

“Look at me, the ceiling won’t talk to you like I can,” Yeji reminded you as you looked at her discontentedly.

“Yes, but it also won’t make fun of me like you do.”

“Look, I’m sorry. I just find it amazing that you’re finally interested in somebody,” she said, as she smiled excitedly.

“You could have stopped after ‘sorry’, you know?” You shot her another annoyed look and she raised her eyebrows as if to say she didn’t care. “Never mind, I’m going to take a shower.”

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“And people ask me how

Well you’re the reason why

I'm dancing in the mirror and singing in the shower”

As you felt the hot water running down your body, you felt a wave of calmness washing over you. Your mind kept going back to thoughts of YangYang and your incredible day with him, as well as the excitement of going home together with him. It was something you wished for so many years, just having him back with you, the two of you together in your room, playing Plants vs. Zombies or Mortal Kombat, some of your favorite PC games back at the time, when you both were around 10 years old.

Without realizing it, you started singing a random song you’ve heard in school today that somehow happened to be a romantic one, matching perfectly with your good mood and your feelings for your childhood friend. Around half an hour later, you got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around your body. Then you took the hairdryer and stood in front of the mirror, drying your hair, but you felt so energetic and happy that you started dancing in front of the mirror. You were holding the hairdryer and you were moving your body randomly, keeping a smile on your face, even though that way drying your hair took much longer time than usual.

When you finally turned the hairdryer off, you noticed Yeji standing in the doorway of your room, looking at you with a wide smile. You rolled your eyes at her for the millionth time today, realizing she may have witnessed at least a part of your dancing in front of the mirror. She giggled, but you decided to act as if nothing out of the ordinary happened, as if you were always that cheerful.

“Why are you laughing?” You asked, as you put the hairdryer back in its place.

“Someone has a crush,” Yeji almost sang that sentence. “I’ve never heard you singing in the shower and seen you dancing in front of the mirror before… Is it really possible that YangYang is the reason behind all that? Could he have changed your usual grumpiness into cheerfulness?”

“What do you mean? I’m the same as usual,” you denied all her claims coolly, sounding credible enough, since you weren’t such an inexperienced liar; you couldn’t say the same for your love life though – you really lacked experience in that part, knowing that calling yourself a “dater” would be factually incorrect.

“Yeah, okay. But if things between you really do work out, I want to be the first one you’re going to share the news with! You’re gonna tell it to Jeno, Jaemin, Renjun and Haechan later,” Yeji stated, as you were looking at her with confusion.

“Calm down, there won’t be any news to tell,” you laughed as you quietly went back to your shared room.

But the part of you that you tried hard to suppress, really hoped you were wrong.

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“All I want, all I need is your lovin'

Baby you make me hot like an oven

Since you came you know what I've discovered

Baby I don't need me another”

The next day was Friday, the day you would come back home together with YangYang, being there with him for the first time in many years. A few days ago you’ve told your mother about reuniting with him and to say she was ecstatic would have been an understatement; she felt as if she was welcoming her second child who has been away for a long time, so she wanted to make sure everything was perfect for him. She even cleaned your room since you weren’t there to do so and its usual state was beyond messy; definitely not the best place to show to such an important and dear guest.

You couldn’t wait to go, but before that, you had classes that seemed endless to you; time seemed to be passing too slowly and for a moment you even thought about suggesting YangYang to skip school today, but your good girl reputation prevented you from doing so.

When the professor said his last words for today, concluding the lecture, you took your backpack. You had put your stuff in it a few minutes ago, while the professor was explaining something about an exam or an “extremely important” group project; you weren’t sure, since you weren’t listening after all. You took out the little mirror you kept in your bag to make sure you looked alright. You tried to comb your hair with your fingers, then you applied a new layer of your favorite pink lipstick; you took so much time with your make up today, even though you usually didn’t wear a lot. When you were ready, you ran to the exit of the auditorium, as YangYang was already waiting in front of it.

“You might need to turn Yeji down,” he said, as you raised your eyebrows questioningly. “The group assignment Mr. Lee mentioned, groups of two are also allowed, so you’re with me.”

So this was what you missed as you were too busy putting your stuff in your backpack in order to be able to leave as early as possible. You smiled at him when you heard his words that made a warm feeling blossom in your body.

“Are we ready to go? All I need is in my backpack, so I don’t need to go back to the dorms, unless you want to.”

“I’m also ready. Let’s go,” he smiled, taking your hand and leading you to the exit of the university.

As you were walking next to him, your hand in his, you felt your heart beating unusually fast; but instead of this making you feel nervous, you felt the same warm feeling spreading through your whole body and this time, you were ready to let go and have fun, without holding back anymore.

“So we have a bus in 15 minutes,” you informed him, as you looked at your phone.

“A bus?” He asked before he stopped walking and you stopped looking at the phone and noticed an expensive black car parked in the university parking. “Why don’t we take a ride in my car?” He leaned on it, tapping the roof softly.

“This car is yours? I can’t believe it, you’ve really grown up, Yangie,” you said with a disbelieving voice in order to tease him, but you still sat next to the driver’s seat in his car, as he has opened the door for you before getting on himself. “Even though I’m a few months older than you, I still don’t have my driver’s license, but I’m working on it,” you said with a discontented tone. You were nervous about driving and when you were stressed, you couldn’t do well so you were trying to get your driver’s license for quite some time now.

“You can do it,” he encouraged you with his usual cheerful tone, holding his fist in the air for a second as a sign of encouragement, as he started the car and left the university parking.

* * *

When you were finally in front of your house, you quickly got off the car as you started jumping around with excitement. He smiled at you as he also got off and when the both of you took your backpacks from the car, you rang the bell of your house. A few seconds later your mom opened the door, welcoming you with warm hugs and her usual good mood, as well as a wide smile.

“Wow, I haven’t been here for such a long time,” YangYang mentioned, as he kept looking around. “Wait, what is this smell? It’s amazing!”

“Oh, it’s the muffins,” she smiled again. “By the way, Yangie, you’ve grown so tall! And my little Y/N is still the same as before, she didn’t really grow up a lot,” your mom teased you,

“Hey, you’re shorter than me, so you aren’t allowed to make fun of me!” You playfully scolded your mom, as you sighed in annoyance.

“But you like girls shorter than you, right, YangYang?” Your mom asked your childhood best friend and you wanted the ground to swallow you up right now since you were so ashamed.

You knew she was only asking this since she shipped you and YangYang romantically ever since you two met. She was truly scared for you not to end up single, while you were living your life, rejecting every guy that tried to flirt with you, especially because they weren’t YangYang. You perfectly understood your own feelings so you knew that you didn’t need and didn’t really want a relationship if it wasn’t with him.

“Actually, yeah, I really like girls like that,” YangYang smiled confidently, looking at you. “They are adorable,” he looked away and only then you could breathe. “And they make me feel tall even though I’m not,” he laughed, as your mother was looking at him with pure adoration in her eyes.

“Ah, you’d be such a perfect son in law! Handsome, good mannered, with a good height and you also know a lot of languages, just like my Y/N! I’m honestly so jealous of your future mother in law,” your mom continued to make you want to disappear and you were on the verge of just taking YangYang’s hand and leading him somewhere far away from that house.

“Believe me, you do not need to worry about that,” YangYang said as he kept smiling at your mom.

Even though you didn’t know what he meant, you really wanted to take him somewhere else, where he wouldn’t be able to talk to your mom.

“Dad is still at work, right? Please ask him to buy iced tea and tell us to come when dinner is ready, see you later,” without waiting for your mom to answer, you took YangYang’s hand and led him upstairs and then into your room.

He was looking around as if he was visiting a foreign place he has never been to before.

“You changed your room color…” He said as he touched the wall. “Baby pink suited you though. Also your curtains are different. I liked the old ones with teddy bears on them, but these are fine too. And the bed… It’s seems suitable for more than one person,” he kept commenting the details about your room, but this time his tone was different, and his look was honestly making you nervous. “Have you invited many guys here, Y/N? In this room, on this bed?”

His question made you choke on air; you were looking at him with shock written all over your face.

“W-why would I…”

You wanted to be honest with him, but then realized that this would probably make you look so boring to him.

“It’s not your business.” You quickly answered, sitting on your chair.

“Ah, my innocent Y/N… I guess I’m the only guy who is not a family member that has been to your room,” he continued teasing you as you glared at him warningly.

“That’s not true! Jaemin, Jeno, Haechan and Renjun have been here too!” You quickly denied his claims.

“Yeah, but I doubt you felt something for any of them.”

You stayed silent for a few seconds before deciding to change the topic.

“Do you wanna play Plants Vs. Zombies?” You suddenly asked.

“Of course! Let’s go!” He answered enthusiastically, seating on the chair next to yours.

It was a whole miracle how you could change the atmosphere and his demeanor just by mentioning a PC game. You started playing and suddenly he was the same old YangYang you knew and loved.

“Plant a sunflower, quickly!” You said, as you were looking at your laptop’s screen.

He did as you said, waiting to get another sun so we could buy another plant.

“Quickly, the zombies are coming!” You were clapping excitedly, looking at your childhood friend play the game you used to play all the time when you were kids.

You were so happy that you got closer to him without realizing.

“You’re making me nervous by staying so close to me,” he confessed, giggling softly.

“A-ah, s-sorry,” you quickly apologized as you moved away from him.

When you decided to take a break from the game, you offered him to watch a movie and he agreed, laying on your bed and you reluctantly laid next to him, trying not to get too close to him. You opened Netflix on your TV and the two of you took some time to choose a movie.

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

“No, no all I know (know)

Only you got me feelin' so (so)

And you know that I have to have ya

And I don't plan to let you go”

You haven’t watched the movie even halfway when he pressed the pause button.

“I can’t do this anymore,” he said, sighing deeply as if he had something that caused him a great amount of stress.

“Do what?” You asked him worriedly.

Was he sick? Was he bored? You thought of so many different things that you could have done which could have irritated him.

“Pretend that everything between us is still the same. Pretend I don’t want to kiss you right now.”

Your eyes widened with shock when you heard his confession, but before you could say anything, he continued talking.

“We’re not kids anymore, Y/N. And I think we did change through all these years. It’s our chemistry that’s still the same. Tell me that you’re feeling it too,” he was talking in a husky voice which made you imagine things you thought you shouldn’t.

YangYang looked at your eyes hesitatingly, then at your lips, or at least that’s what you thought you saw him looking at, even though for you, it didn’t make any sense for him to be looking there, even after hearing him say he wanted to kiss you. You felt as if that whole situation was just a dream and nothing that happened was going to affect reality in any way. But as you were busy overanalyzing things as usual, you felt a strange, yet addicting sensation. As your eyes were still open, you looked at YangYang who was kissing you. You couldn’t believe that was happening, but you quickly closed your eyes, enjoying his lips on yours. Your heart was beating fast as you tried to remember this sweet feeling, savouring the taste of his lips. When he moved away, you slowly opened your eyes, looking at his with confusion, yet with trust. You were sure that whatever was going to happen, you were safe and happy with him.

“I- You… Uh, did you like that?”

You nervously nodded, as you were wondering what to say.

“Great, I did too. Does that mean you like me back?” YangYang wanted to check in with you, before officially asking you the last question he wanted to ask ever since he realized who you were back in the canteen that day.

“You’re so special to me, YangYang. I like you a lot,” you confessed, feeling a little shy, but still trying to keep his eyes on him, because you thought he deserved to know exactly how you felt about him without finding out how nervous you actually were. “By the way, that was my first kiss and I’m so happy it was with you,” you looked at him adoringly.

“Really? That’s so cute!” He exclaimed with a sweet smile. “So you’re sure you haven’t kissed anyone from your friends group?”

“Actually I kissed Jaemin and Jeno on the cheek once at a party because of a dare. And on the same night Haechan and I got so drunk that we almost kissed, but our friends stopped us before we ‘unlock a whole another relationship’, as they said.”

YangYang sighed with annoyance before mustering up the courage to ask you the most important question.

“Do you want to be like… Uh, you know?”

You were looking at him with confusion written all over your face.

“You sound just like Mark, he’s a friend of mine who’s one year older than us,” you teased him, since you really found his nervousness to be cute.

“Come on, you know what I’m trying to say,” he tried to avoid saying it out loud, but you weren’t going to let him do that.

“Do I know, Yangie? How can I know if you haven’t said it yet?”

“You went from a shy girl to a smug girl in just a second,” he mumbled with discontent.

“But you’re the same! You were teasing me earlier and now you sound like Mark Lee!” You complained.

“Who is Mark Lee?” YangYang asked even though he didn’t really insist on knowing; he just wanted to postpone asking his main question for as long as possible.

“That Mark guy I told you about! Are you even listening to me?”

“Should I be jealous of him?” He pouted as he was waiting for your answer.

“Maybe you should,” you continued provoking him in order for him to properly ask you what he wanted to.

“Come on! Aren’t your four handsome guy friends enough people to be jealous of? When I see how you’re looking at Yeji, sometimes I’m jealous of her too! I also can’t stand it when Haechan looks at you as if he has so many improper thoughts. Or when Jeno and Jaemin ask you if you have eaten. Or when Renjun is smiling at you and laughing at your jokes! Ah, I hate it so much that I want to punch-“

You interrupted YangYang with a kiss.

“My answer is yes.”

“You’re going to be my girlfriend?” He asked, hoping you would agree.

“No, I’ve never heard you ask that,” you crossed your arms, smiling at him playfully.

“You’re going to be my girlfriend because I said so~,” he almost sang that sentence, as he decided to make sure you were incapable to refuse by suddenly making you fall on your bed as he trapped your body under his.

“No, I’m not going to do it~,” you answered in the same tone, as you tried to flip him over, so that you could be on top of him.

But when he noticed what you were trying to do, he caught your wrist and kissed your lips deeply, making you forget everything else. In that moment you relaxed under his touch feeling safer than ever. You kissed him back with the same lust as his, as your fingers threaded through his fluffy hair. You continued passionately kissing each other for a few minutes, taking very short breaks to breathe, since you both missed each other’s lips too much to stay separated even for a few seconds that felt like an eternity for you.

But when you heard a knock on your door, YangYang quickly got off you and he sat on the bed innocently, as you followed his example. You quickly fixed his hair which was quite messy because you were running your fingers through it all the time.

“Y-you can come in,” you said with a voice that was a little distorted, while you were trying to normalize your heavy breathing.

When you said that, the door opened and your dad came in.

“Hi, Y/N. Here’s the iced tea,” he said, giving you the bottle of iced tea which you contentedly took from his hands and left on the ground. “YangYang, it’s great to see you again,” he smiled and YangYang smiled back. “Dinner is ready, so you can come downstairs,” your dad said and you nodded synchronously. Then he turned around and walked out the door, closing it.

YangYang got up from your bed as he gave you his hand, which you took. He kept holding your hand as you were walking down the stairs.

“I guess your parents are really going to have the best son-in-law,” YangYang said and as soon as you realized he was talking about himself, you hit his arm as you laughed.

You were finally truly happy again; you felt having YangYang by your side meant that nothing was impossible and all your dreams could come true, just like the seemingly unrealistic dream of having him back while you were longing for him all these years. It turns out your long wait was absolutely worth it and now that he was here with you again, you weren’t going to let him go.

#nct #wayv #nct fluff #wayv fluff #yangyang #yangyang fluff #nct scenarios #wayv scenarios #yangyang imagines #yangyang scenarios #song fic

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allyreactions · 4 years

Text

Dating NCT | Mark

- masterlist requests : OPEN

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║ pairings ; mark lee x fem! reader

║ genre ; fluffy fluff, smut, angst

║ word count ; 2.4k

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~ A/N : I’ve been so soft for Mark, I just had to let it out. also I think I went a little bit overboard ... I wrote so much. so please pretty please send me your feedback on it because I literally poured my heart into this post. thanks 🥺

~ Admin Ally

* gif credits to the owner *

♡ how you meet :

you first met Mark at the local bookstore

you were browsing through the fiction section, searching for your next read

as you pursued the shelves, you slid your finger across the spine of the books

until landing on the mystery novel you had been searching for

you removed the book from the shelf and added it to the stack of books you were carrying in your other arm

feeling satisfied with your collection, you proceeded to walk over to the lounge area to review the books

you sat down in a large, green armchair and placed the stack of books next to you on the side table

you picked up the first book, the mystery novel you had been dying to get your hands on, and started reading through the authors note on the inside cover

as you were flipping through the pages, glancing at the chapters, someone tripped over your foot

“oh, my bad”

the boy shyly bowed and apologized

“it’s okay,” you replied nodding back

the boy continued on his way and walked over to the magazine section

there he joined two other boys, you assumed they were friends

you shrugged off the interaction and diverted your attention back to your book

about 10 minutes pass by and you’ve glanced over each book you’ve found

you decided to buy the mystery novel and a YA romance novel

you gathered your things before putting the other books back on the shelf

you were back in the fiction section, your eyes scanning the shelves to find the correct place to put away a sci-fi novel when you heard some muffled giggling behind you

you decided not to turn around and focused on finding the section of books that matched the one you were trying to put away

“Johnny, I’m not gonna talk to her” a boy said in a whispered tone

“you’ve been staring at her this whole time, go talk to her!” encouraged another boy, you assumed it was the boy names Johnny

you tried again to ignore the whispers behind you

that is until you felt a tap on your shoulder

you turned around and were faced with a black-haired blushing boy

you glanced at the two boys behind him who were pretending to be inconspicuous, but failing at it

one boy was tall with auburn hair and held a starbucks cup in his hand

the other was slightly shorter with long blonde hair, is that a mullet?

“I um, ..” the boy in front of you spoke

you returned your gaze back to the shy boy

“I uh, my name’s Mark”

you were still very much confused as to what was going on

you didn’t mean to, but the puzzled look on your face must have given the boy a bad feeling because he said

“I don’t mean to bother you, but I um .. I think you’re really cute”

his ears were bright red and he had trouble looking you in the eye

he was so nervous

it’s charming

“I promise I’m not a bad guy, but um, would you lie to go on um ... a date with me?”

♡ first date :

you guys had been talking for a few days leading up to your date

Mark wanted to make sure you didn’t think he was some sort of weirdo for asking you out in Barnes and Noble

and he wanted you to at least get to know him before going out

and the two of you discussed your schedules and were able to set up a date and time for the two of you to go out

and Mark, being the gentleman that he is, decided to take you to a restaurant for your first date

he wanted to keep things sort of traditional and classy and make you feel special

he’s a softie like that

he really wanted to impress you by dressing nice in a blazer and dress shoes

he wanted to prove that he’s more than just the nervous, giggly guy you found in a bookstore

ugh im so soft

anyway, Mark picks you up and you two head to the restaurant together

once you’re seated at your table, the waiter takes your orders for drinks and appetizers

once she leaves, there’s nothing but silent tension

Mark’s hand flies to the back of his neck, nervously fildeling with the hair behind his head.

“you look really nice” he said, his voice was low

you could sense the anxiousness by his tone

“thanks, you look really nice too” you said, returning the compliment

there was another long pause

“how are your books? I.. I mean the ones you bought last week” Mark asked, he was making an effort to start a conversation

the two of you had no problem talking over text, but the both of you are clearly nervous around each other

was it because both nervous and socially awkward? or was it the sexual tension?

who knows

eventually the awkwardness subsided sort of

Mark was still visibly nervous

he kept rubbing the back of his neck and would stutter every so often

it was cute that he was nervous

but it’s all part of his charm

I mean, that’s the reason you agreed to go out with him in the first place

alright, back to your dinner

you were able to have a decent conversation with him

the two of you discussed your family and friends, your hobbies and interests

nothing too wild

but the whole time, Mark listened to you intently

he would ask questions, furthering your conversation

he seemed genuinely interested in getting to know you and learning about your interests

it was refreshing and sweet

every so often, he would crack a joke

and they were always so cheesy and dorky

but it was cute, so you laughed along

after your meal, Mark had offered to walk you home before it got too late

he wanted to make sure you got home safely

when you arrived at your doorstep, the two of you exchanged goodbye’s

“I had a good time tonight” you said

“I’m glad, so did I” Mark smiled back shyly

you placed a soft peck on his cheek

his cheeks flushed pink and the tip of his ears turned bright red

“Good night beautiful” Mark said, taking ahold of your hand

he leaned in and gently kissed your forehead

♡ living together / couple stuff :

everyday with Mark is an adventure

and I mean that in the best way

Mark is always full of surprises

sometimes he’ll be sitting in the living room and just start strumming his guitar and sing soft ballads and his voice would echo through the house

or you’ll be fixing dinner for the two of you in the kitchen and you’ll hear his infectious laughter from the living room

you and Mark have tons of inside jokes

he’s always making cheesy jokes

like even if his jokes aren’t funny

you’ll still laugh along because he’s just that cute and clueless

sometimes he’ll come home and share stories about his day

like he’ll talk about the producers he met with and the songs he’s been working on with them

and he’ll get super excited too

“babe, I can’t wait for you to hear the finished product”

not that that he wants validation from you, but hearing you praise him for his work and his music really gives him an ego boost

who doesn’t want to hear the love of their life compliment them on their passions?

also, you’re a huge inspiration and muse to him

now not every song he write its written about you, but when it comes to love songs on nct albums or a superm album, you’re always at the forefront of his mind when contributing to love lyrics

he loves adding little nods to your relationship in his music

it’s his way of showing his love for you

but it’s not always in just lyrics, he can also be romantic in his actions

although he can be a little awkward sometimes

he’s just a sweet puppy okay? be gentle with him

Mark is a big cuddle bug

he’s kind of clingy when he returns home from tour and promotions

and he wants to spend as much time with you as possible when his schedule is clear

mornings with Mark are an experience

he absolutely loves to treat you to breakfast in bed

but Mark isn’t the best chef

so he’ll either try his best at making you eggs and toast

or he’ll stop by your favorite cafe and purchase a to-go order

Mark loves making you feel special in any little way he can

but let’s talk about the night time

after dinner, the two of you like to cuddle up and watch the newest kdrama episode on tvN or just watch a random bad movie on Netflix to make fun of

you’ll of course have a big bowl of popcorn and finish it within the first 10 minutes of the movie

and when the movie is over, you’ll walk to your shared bedroom

and cuddle up under the blankets and snuggle into Marks chest

because of course he’s the big spoon

and you’ll interlock fingers

sometimes when neither of you can sleep, Mark encourages you to talk about whatever is on your mind

because sometimes you have too much going on and you mind is just so full that you can’t sleep

Mark is super understanding and just offers his ear to you

he’ll comfort you if there’s anything serious going on

Mark is just super supportive and loves having deep conversations with you

he loves how these deep conversations bring the two of you closer together because it strengthens your trust in one another

♡ arguments :

Mark doesn’t seem like the confrontational type

and the two of you don’t fight often

like I had mentioned before up above, you and Mark tend to tell each other everything

there’s not much that you hide from each other

and you guys have such a strong bond that jealousy doesn’t really affect you both

but that doesn’t mean that life stresses can’t affect you

now we all know that we tend to take out our frustrations on the people we love

so I feel like most of the bumps in your relationship could be related to the stresses from work and everyday life

like sometimes you just have a bad day at work

you boss is in a mood and takes it out on you, so you bring home that frustration and eventually take it out on Mark

even though you don’t mean to

another example may be the stress about your public relationship with him as an idol

obviously if you received hate, it might have an effect on your actions towards your boyfriend

you become distant and closed off a bit

the comments say that you don’t deserve someone like Mark, and even though you know they’re wrong that doesn’t mean their words don’t hurt

and when Mark realizes how closed off you’ve been, he’ll try to talk with you about it

of course he won’t force you to talk about things until you’re ready

but Mark can be a little fragile, and the fact that you’ve been distant would hurt him

and when he hears that you’ve been doubting that you’re worthy of his love really hurts him

he’ll comfort you and rub the tears from your face

seeing you cry just breaks his heart

♡ sexy time :

okay, now I’ve said this before, but Mark is a soft dom, possibly a switch

listen, don’t cancel me

I feel like Mark puts on a show that he’s super kinky

and his lyrics from ‘whiplash” and ‘drippin’ are proof of that

but when it comes down to the wire, I think he’s actually kind of nervous at first

sex with Mark for the first time is a sweet experience

of course, y’all aren’t going to jump straight into choking on the first night

Mark is a gentleman

a good christian boy

Mark is a soft dom for your first time

he’s very gentle and he takes his time, making sure that you’re comfortable and satisfied every step of the way

he places kisses all over your body, making sure he pays attention to every inch of your body

Mark pays attention to every moan and whimper that falls from your precious lips

he’ll leave love bites and markings in all your sensitive spots

his thrusts are slow and deep, making it easier for you to feel every inch of him completely fill you

I can’t see Mark finishing inside you for the first time, but creampies are definitely something he’s into

*cough* drippin by nct dream and drop by superm *cough*

he really likes creampies

but once the two of you get comfortable with each other and settle into your relationship, that’s when the kinks come out

I would say that Mark is open to experimenting in bed

and even though the both of you are comfortable with each other, Mark is still slightly awkward when talking about sex with you

it’s just who he is

when it comes to trying out things that you’re interested in, that’s when I feel like Mark would take the backseat

he’d sub on those nights

it’s just easier for you to take control when doing things that you’re interested in

but when it comes to you wanting Mark to choke you or spank you, I feel like he would be a little hesitant at first

he just doesn’t want to hurt you

he’s not sure how strong his grip should be around your throat

he’s not sure how hard he should spank you

what level of pain did you want to receive?

but once he saw your response and heard your begging, he’ll start to get into it

he’ll thrust into you hard and fast, his grip around your throat will tighten

he watches as your eyes roll back in pure pleasure, until you finally climax and cry out his name in ecstasy

he loves watching you cum all over him

I can see him wanting to try out cockwarming, but he’s somewhat nervous when brining it up to you

cockwarming is something the two of you do when you’re cuddling after sex

of something that you do in the morning when it’s cold outside and you just want to cozy up and share each other’s warmth

it’s an intimate thing that Mark’s been interested in trying out, and sharing moments like that with you would be pretty meaningful for him

259 notes · View notes

thesffcorner · 5 years

Text

S.T.A.G.S.

S.T.A.G.S. is a YA thriller written by M A Bennet. It follows Greer, a girl who is a new student at St. Aidan the Great School, or STAGS, a private, Catholic school in Northumberland England. She gets invited to a weekend of “huntin’, shootin’, and fishin’” by the Medievals, the group of 6 most popular students in the school, who practically rule the student body, along with two other students. However, as soon as Greer gets to Longcross, the estate where she’s to spend the weekend, she realizes something is amiss, and she might be in more danger than she ever thought possible. S.T.A.G.S. is a book that is so full of film and pop culture references, that I feel it’s only fitting I myself start with one; this book is basically the Riot Club, except our lead is a girl. If you’ve read the play or watched the film adaptation then you know exactly what kind of story you’re in for, and if you liked either, than you will definitely like this. Let’s start with the setting; I don’t read a lot of books by English authors, and it was honestly refreshing to read this one, because England as a country is both much closer to what I’m used to, being from Europe, while also being entirely different. I didn’t care too much about the meticulous descriptions of the estate and the school, however, what I liked was that this books avoids my pet peeve of having these descriptions being meaningless. This is told in first person, and the way Greer tells the story, is like a diary entry that she’s writing after all the events have already happened. As such, she’s able to give little hints and comments on everything she sees and experiences, like what things remind her off, or why she thought they were relevant to mention. She also makes a lot of remarks on things I don’t often read in these types of books, the main one being money and status. I really, really liked this aspect of the book. Bennet talks a lot about accents, dialects and pronunciation, and how that determines not just what part of the country you come from, but also your social and economic status. Greer is from Manchester, and as such she has a pretty thick accent, that immediately marks her as an outsider in the posh world of high class British society. There are parts of the novel where Bennet writes out phonetically what words sound like, and how their pronunciation is very different depending on who’s speaking. When the Medievals talk, they add r’s in words that don’t have them, and they clip their words so that they never say the full thing. When Nel, another character who is as rich, but she is new money talks, the way she pronounces the word ‘love’ nets her the receiving end of bullying because of her not truly being posh. This discussion of class becomes even more complicated when we take into account religion, race and new vs old money. Nel, who is richer than probably even the Medievals is still shunned and bullied, because she got the money recently, and as such has no class or social standing. The Medievals all come from incredibly rich, well connected old families; their leader Henry has had the land since the 11th century, because of an ancestor who fought in the crusades. Likewise, another character, Shafeen, whose father is a literal Indian Prince, and his family has been royalty, rich and high class for much longer than any of the Medievals’ families is rejected and bullied because of his skin color, and the fact that he’s Indian. This dissection of class, race, economic status and language was so fascinating to me because I never see it explored like this in YA; it’s also a nice refresher for American readers that racism and classism though by no means gone in Europe, operate differently than they do in the US. Another thing about the setting that I really enjoyed was the discussion about what class and rich actually means. Like I said, Nel is rich, but all her clothes are brand new, and everything she does and wears seems to be a little bit off. Though she imitates the mannerisms and even the speaking style of the Medievals almost perfectly, the fact that everything on her is brand new is what gives her away as a poser. There are scenes where Greer walks around the manner and notes how despite everything being incredibly opulent it’s also falling apart; the clothes are old and have been worn, the walls have gold decals that are peeling, the house itself is old. I was reminded constantly of a comment a friend of my family made about how people in England live in houses that barely have modern plumbing just because they are old and ‘traditional’, and refuse or in many cases can’t integrate modern technology to make life easier and more pleasant. Speaking of technology, that’s another topic that’s greatly discussed in this book. I found this was explored less well, and I thought it was a bit on the nose, mostly because it intersects heavily with the reason everyone is going to Lockwood in the first place, so I can’t discuss it without spoilers. I did like that technology wasn’t vilanized and even ended up helping at the end. You might be wondering why I gave this book only 3 stars if nothing I said so far was negative. That mostly comes down to the plot and the ending. I feel like the plot was fairly predictable. Partly because the story is told in flashback and partly because it’s very easy to guess where things are going, I never really felt true tension in the scenes that were meant to be tense. I was worried about the characters sure, but I knew more or less exactly how things would pan out, and I guessed fairly easily who would be the one to die. Even the very final twist I saw coming from a mile away, and since the book has an open ending, I’m not really sure how to feel about it. If there’s ever a sequel maybe it would make more sense, but as is, it feels like the book came to a natural conclusion, and then had a last minute Bloomhouse style twist thrown at the very end that deflates a lot of what made it good up until that point. There were also some issues with the characters. Let’s start with the Medievals. There are 6 of them: 3 girls and 3 boys. I had a lot of trouble telling any of them apart, mostly because they are meant to resemble and act like each other, but also because outside of Henry, Greer has very little interaction with any of them. Bennett tries to distinguish the 3 blonde Medieval girls from one another: Charlotte is the preppiest one, who is the most fake enthusiastic and ‘speaks in italics’. Esme is the fake polite one, who pretends to be friendly, and Lara is the Russian one with the lazy, condescending accent. However, since the interaction between Greer and them is so minimal, I ended up only really distinguishing Lara, because she’s Henry’s girlfriend and Russian. However, the girls have nothing on Henry’s buddies, Cockson and Piers. I couldn't tell u anything about them or who’s who. All I know is that Cockson is also named Henry, but they both like drinking, they are both supremely loud and rude, and they are both indistinguishably awful. This is intentional, but like with the girls, it didn’t really make them compelling characters. Henry fares better in that he’s the only one that has any personality. Unfortunately, he suffers from this thing called informed traits, and this other thing, which doesn’t have a name, but I like to call it Ludonarrative Dissonance, but for books. We are told multiple times, by both Greer and other characters like Nel, that Henry is supremely charming. He knows the right thing to say, he knows how to touch people, how to smile, and in general how to woo everyone into following his orders. The problem was, that I never found him charming or funny, and I never thought any of the points he made were reasonable or smart. Maybe I’m just old and have been trained by the internet to never trust anyone who talks about the ‘natural order of things’ or about how ‘hunting helps cull the undesirable, lesser species’, but no one who says that is a nice or charming person. His whole diatribe about technology was likewise, like listening to an old man yell at a could. There are many valid points against how technology rules people’s lives these days, but having less time for hunting, is really not one of them. There was no real scene where I understood why Greer liked him, other than him being hot and calling her beautiful. I can’t really decide if this is a flaw with Henry as a character (since Greer is pretty dumb and naive), but the fact that I didn’t buy any of the characters traits he was meant to have doesn’t say good things. Even General Zaroff, who is character Henry is so clearly based on, was so much more charming and gallant, and had interesting things to say, even if you knew he was mad the whole time. That’s what I expected; what I got was a bad Lost villain. The lead characters fared much better. First we have Chanel or Nel. I actually liked her fine; she’s rich and incredibly insecure in her place in the world, since she grew up middle class and is forced to quickly adapt and assimilate in a world that is notoriously isolated, hostile and judgmental. She has lots of flaws; she’s superficial, she’s cowardly and she’s easily seduced, but I liked that she overcame a lot of them, and I enjoyed her friendship with Greer. Shafeen was my absolute favorite character. I don’t often read about Indian characters, and I’m not entirely sure how accurate his characterization was in this, but what we get I liked a lot. He was smart, he was opinionated and unlike Henry, he was actually charming. When he compliments Nel or Greer I believed it, and I could imagine him saying it and it sounding enticing. He wasn’t perfect either; he says some nasty things to Greer, and he also holds some ‘problematic’ views on hunting and this world of high class, which is understandable seeing as he’s royalty. Greer was interesting. I can’t say I liked her, but she wasn’t a bad character. She has this tendency to compare everything to films, which I also do, and as such I know first hand how grating it can be. I appreciated that her repertoire was pretty broad, spanning classics, French films, blockbusters and romantic comedies, and the ending bit that involved Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows was surprisingly fitting, and actually made sense with the plot of the book. However, Greer was also probably the most dumb and naive character I’ve read from in a while. I don’t mean that as in she’s badly written, I think she’s supposed to be kind of dumb. There were so many points where she lets herself be manipulated by Henry purely because it’s the easier option, and it was grating to read about. I’m not saying I want the character to be a genius, but again, maybe I’m just too old to believe the things she does even for a second. The other issue I had with Greer was that she seemed to not really have her priorities straight. This is hard to discuss without spoilers, but let’s just say, considering what she finds out about Henry, and what nearly happens to her while at the mansion, the guilt that she carries feel ill-placed. Nel even calls her out on her behavior, which makes me think it was intentional, but we never truly have a moment to acknowledge that what the Medievals are doing wasn’t just misguided and accidentally, but sociopathic, not to mention racist and classist. Overall I liked this book quite a lot. I think it was well written, explored some really interesting topics, and had a fast paced, engaging plot. I am confident that I would like anything else Bennet writes, and that with perhaps a slightly different plot, her work could be some of my favorite. As is, I do recommend this thriller, only if you manage your expectation, and have more patience for tomfoolery than me

goodreads

#s.t.a.g.s.#s.t.a.g.s. review #moni talks #book review

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etherealrj · 7 years

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same game - reddie

pairing : reddie

words : 2K

warnings : none

MASTERLIST

request here

five times richie flirted with eddie and the one time he didn't

A/N I've never written one of these before so I hope its okay anon! it's four am rn but i was so determined to finish this but then tumblr wiped it and i almost cried. i wasn't gonna post it now but my last request did super well so i'll treat ya'll.

i legit googled how to flirt with someone bc i have never. So I legit googled how did people flirt in the 90's and then this happened :') I'm so sorry in advance, I got so carried away with this my god. Imagine if Pennywise never happened and Ben, Bev and Mike were losers from the beginning.

Eddie had always known Richie to a big flirt. He was his best friend so it was granted that Richie was to flirt with Eddie, so Eddie just put up with it. It started at the young of ten when the boys were sat side by side in their respected seats. That’s why in the middle of English class when Richie leant over to doodle a love heart on the corner of Eddie’s book with their initials ‘RT + EK = Forever,’ written within, he thought nothing of it. Everywhere you went throughout the school, Richie would have marked his territory by writing some obscure devotion of love for Eddie. Whether it was their initials in a heart, ‘Richie ♡ ‘s Eddie’ or Eddie Tozier, there were signs written everywhere. From classrooms, to bathroom stalls, to random wooden chairs that lingered around the school’s perimeter. Eddie knew Richie had a book covered in variations of their names etched upon every single piece of paper, he also knew the Richie’s parents weren’t too fond about it. But Eddie never understood why.

They were at the school disco, at the age of twelve, all the losers rocked up in hopes of having a nice time. In other words, they were forced by their parents. But Mike did end up tagging along so they were all happy about that. It wasn’t any surprise that the seven misfits sat in the back of the gym, all sitting around a circular table in their own conversations completely oblivious to the rest of their peers. Eddie sat with Richie to his right, Stan to his left. He was in a deep conversation about the new Captain America comic book when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He glanced at Richie’s out stretched hand to see a small red bottle of Panda Pop sitting in his palm. Richie had a wide grin permanently stuck to his face. Eddie glanced at the drink before looking back up to Richie. He looked around the circular table at the lack of drinks in any of the other loser’s hands. “Richie.” Eddie said, gazing locking with the taller boys. “You forgot about everyone else!” He exclaimed. “This is just like you.” Eddie shook his head, standing and brushing shoulders with Richie as he headed in the direction of the rectangular table filled with beverages. All the other losers glanced up at Richie, with amusement behind their eyes. Richie sent them a glare and fell back into his chair.

III

When the boys reached the age of fourteen, Richie’s charade continued and Eddie saw no end to the plague of Richie Tozier. After a long, exhausted filled day of school Eddie just wanted to leave the prison that they were supposed to call a haven. Ducking around the back of the school to meet the loser at the bike racks, hopefully avoiding Henry Bowers and his goonies at the same time. Heavy footsteps echoed his ears and a slow cringe made its way onto Eddie’s face. He froze in his place, bracing himself for the first round of physical abuse he was about to endure. But nothing ever came.

“Hey Ed’s!” Eddie felt an arm wrap around his shoulder, which caused the poor boy to let out a sigh, his body coming down from the fright. He really wasn’t in the mood to get beat up right now.

“Don’t call me that.” Eddie mumbled under his breath and began walking again. Richie hummed in response, tightening his grip around Eddie’s neck.

“Do you have a band-aid- “

“You know I do Richie why.” Eddie’s patience was running low with the boy. There was only so long you could handle being around Richie ‘trashmouth’ Tozier.

“Because I just scraped my knee falling for you. “Eddie rolled his eyes before shrugging off Richie’s arm and began to walk away from the boy in a huff.

“Eddie my boy, don’t be like that!” Richie said in one of his completely ridiculous accents that Eddie could only describe as the, ‘shitty British John Cleese.’ Richie jogged lightly to catch up with the shorter boy. “You know I love you! Almost as much as your fat Mom!”

At the age of fifteen was when Richie had really began listening to music. His home life was rough, that Eddie knew and the only way Richie seemed to deal with it was listening to his music. Eddie never seemed to see the appeal. That’s way when Richie Tozier snuck into his bedroom window at two am with a mixtape, Richie’s chicken scratch hand writing over the top, reading the words ‘Eddie Spaghetti’ a messy love heart was added after his name and a doodle of roses sat beside it. Eddie didn’t know what to think.

Richie hadn’t even stayed long enough to make sure Eddie would listen to it, but he did and Richie knew he would. Eddie opened the plastic container, a folded piece of film fell out from on top of the cassette tape and landed within his lap. Picking the white film up he unfolded the picture and was greeted with his own laughing face starring back at him. He was sat on top of Richie’s shoulders, the photo he remembers being taken only a week earlier after school.

He remembers the day clearly, he had fought Richie and told him to leave him alone because there was no way in hell, he was willingly getting on top of the 5”7 boys shoulders without a fight. But there he sat, legs hanging over Richie’s shoulders Richie’s hands holding tightly on Eddie’s own. As both boys smiled happily, hand in hand.

Eddie admired the wide smile on Richie’s face, the pure joy that seemed to radiate from the photo brought a small smile to his own. Brushing his finger lightly over Richie’s face, just appreciating the loud boy. With a sigh, Eddie flipped over the film to read the small words written on the back, “love is like syphilis, it makes you crazy, eventually leading to death.” [X] Eddie rolls his eyes at Richie poor attempt of humour but he was humoured at the very least.

Leaning over to the stereo on his shelf, he turned the volume to the minimum as to not wake his mother, the first song started to play. The tune of the song made his eyes roll before the words even started to play. He laid back onto his bed, arm behind his head, the words filled his ears, a small smile on his face.

“Oh, I can't fight this feeling any longer,

And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow

What started out this friendship has grown stronger

I only wish I had the strength to let it show,” [X]

A year later the losers were standing at the counter of the Aladdin. Richie’s arm in its forever permanent spot around Eddie’s back. The smaller boy subconsciously leant into his side. Eddie wonder if Richie ever regrets how much he flirts with the younger boy, Eddie thought he surely would be stopping any girls from getting to Richie. But Richie didn’t seem to care. “Hey Babe?” Richie questioned.

Eddie hummed in response, too use to the pet names that Richie’s given him over the years for it to matter. Richie had grown a whole lot in a year, he had to be nearing 6” foot by now. Eddie was not at all jealous over the fact he was still barely reaching 5”5, still the shortest of all the Loser’s, Bev included. Eddie felt Richie shift behind him, head resting on top of his own, arms around Eddie’s waist. “Did you want any popcorn?” Richie could be extremely clinging when he wasn’t in your face obnoxiously joking about sleeping with his mom. Richie didn’t seem like he was in the happiest moods today, all the Loser’s would agree, so Eddie went with the flow and gave him the attention he thought the older boy needed.

“Don’t worry about it Rich, I’ll pay for the popcorn. You got us the tickets.” Eddie said with a light tap of his hands-on Richie’s own.

“It was my idea to come see the movie Ed’s, I’ll get the popcorn. “ Richie said, stepping away from the teenage boy. Eddie turned around to catch him before he left.

“Hey Richie?” Eddie questioned. Richie turned with hum in response. “Why do you never buy any of the others popcorn?” Richie eyes lifted slightly in surprise, a small smile playing on his face, he flicked his tongue out to swipe itself across his bottom lip. He stared over to where the rest of the loser’s stood, laughing loudly at something Stan had said. Richie’s face deadpanned.

“I’m trying to impress your Mom, Ed’s. “

+ I

All the Loser’s sat around a circle, it was March the seventh which means it was Richie’s seventeenth birthday. Buddy Holly [X] was playing lowly in the background. And Eddie was feeling nervous. The past few days Richie had seemed to distance himself from the boy and Eddie had wondered if it was something he did. Neither Bill or Bev had any idea on the matter which Eddie feel even worse about the situation. Eddie bit his lip as he passed the bottle half filled with amber coloured liquid around the circle. Richie seemed perfectly happy but Eddie felt out of place. Without the touches or the kind words or jokes about his Mom. Richie wasn’t Richie.

Moments later, the bottle was done and the group had dissipated. Eddie grabbed Richie’s hand and pulled him away from the main floor. “Ed’s?” Richie questioned. “Is everything okay?”

Richie eye’s squinted to look into Eddie’s own. “I-Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Richie turned his head to the side seemingly confused. Eddie opened his mouth before closing it. “I-Yo-We-Bu-,” Eddie stared at Richie in exasperation.

“Damn Bill, calm down a bit would ya?.” Eddie stare turned quickly into a disappointed glare. Richie held his hands up in defence.

Eddie crossed his arms over his chest, looking up at the taller boy through his dark brown curls. Eddie let out a huff, “Why don’t you treat me like you use to.” Eddie looked at the ground, suddenly more interested in his stark white converse than the conversation.

Richie cracked smile. “Finally.” He muttered. “I was waiting to see how long it would take for you to miss me.”

Eddie tilted his head in utter disbelief as he watched Richie face etched with a cheeky smile. Eddie shook his head and in one quick moment his small moisturized hands were upon Richie’s cheeks, he stood on his tippy toes and placed his soft pink lips against Richie’s chapped ones with an impatient desire. Eddie felt Richie gasped in surprise as he lips moved against Richie’s own. Eddie was yet to pull away when he felt Richie began applying the same amount of force or maybe even more back. Eddie noted that Richie tasted like tobacco and cheap whiskey, but the boy couldn’t get enough. Richie’s hands trailed down to Eddie’s hips, gripping the edge of the small boys lightly coloured shirt.

As he pulled away, the feeling of Richie’s lips lingered against his own, Eddie brought a hand to his lips touching them with his fingertips as a smile spread across his face. He rested back on the balls of his feet before looking up to meet Richie’s gaze.

Richie’s mouth laid ajar, eyes widen in feign surprise. “Was that you trying to flirt with me Eddie Kaspbrak?”

A/N this did not turn out what I was hoping but eh, still cute ish

if you wanna be in the reddie tag list lemme know!

taglist : @colinmorgay @its-ya-girl-mercy @tastes-like-cherry-coke @netzoflix @bitch-its-youknowwho @prkrptr @ladycataztrophe @whoisjjacob @eddies-inhaler @stenbroughh @eddierichietozier @scienceyyy @randvmfandoms

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howlsmovinglibrary · 7 years

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The relationship between misogyny and romance: a SJM study

Why female desire* isn’t problematic, but A Court of Thorns and Roses is.

In which I wade into an issue in depth, praying that the flame war gods do not strike me down.

**Please note that this essay discusses only the misogynist elements of SJM’s writing in the ACOTAR series. There are obviously other problematic elements that require acknowledgement, but this is the one I feel confident in addressing. I haven’t read any of ACOWAR yet.**

*also, female desire in this instance refers to the desire of the presumed female reader of romance. The reading of romance and YA is obviously not exclusive to women, although a lot of the assumptions of SJM’s work ascribe to the concept of a binary gender.

Recently (or perhaps it’s always been there, and has only recently wandered onto my dash) I’ve seen a lot of discussion of the problematic nature of Sarah J. Maas’ writing. This is an issue I have thought about a lot, because although I absolutely hate the Throne of Glass series with a passion, on account of what I feel is bad writing, poor plotting and awful treatment of non-heterosexual non-white people, for some reason this hatred does not extend to ACOTAR and ACOMAF, which I read and really enjoyed, despite much of the content - and the issues of diversity and misogyny - being consistent across both.

I soon realised that this difference of opinion lies in the genre distinctions I make between the two. While Throne of Glass was initially marketed as a YA high fantasy book (I never got past the second, so I can’t speak for the later books), ACOTAR was sold to me as essentially a romance novel, or at least a paranormal romance. While I ask for diverse representation and good feminism from my fantasy reading, it seems that I consider escapist fantasy, misogyny and sexism to be all part and parcel of romance.

In fact, when you examine ACOTAR and ACOMAF’s problematic gender portrayal (as I am about to), you realise that a lot of Maas’ problematic tropes - traditional alpha male behaviour, such as possessiveness and animalistically coded desire, issues of iffy (and in cases utterly absent) consent, reinforced heterosexuality - are typical to a majority of the romance genre.

‘Alpha Males’ in Romance

The question of whether ‘alpha male’ behaviour is problematic and should be called out isn’t unique to SJM’s writing (although, in her case, you could perhaps refer to it as ‘fae male’ behaviour). It has been levelled at the whole of the romance genre, in particular paranormal romances and ‘bodice rippers’, for a long time.

The problem with outright condemning it lies in the paradox of the romance genre itself. On the one hand, romance is written by and aimed almost exclusively at women – it is the genre where female desire, which is often suppressed or demonised in society and popular media, can be freely indulged and explored. Women are writing these kinds of relationships, and other women are buying them, so clearly some kind of female desire is being acknowledged and explored, whereas before it would’ve been suppressed or even punished. On the other hand, it often tends to be explored in some quite squicky ways. Because romance has roots in the Byronic heroes of Mr. Darcy, Mr. Rochester and (for a reason I still cannot fathom) Heathcliffe, they often feature domineering, rude, taciturn and belligerent male love interests who are critical and sometimes cruel to the heroine. And, in the paranormal romance genres, and new adult literature in particular, this has morphed into a more sinister figure, the possessive, aggressive ‘alpha’ male.

Feminist critics have constantly been trying to decide whether romance literature is feminist or misogynist. Most would say that women should be allowed to enjoy sex and indulge in whatever fantasies they wish to, when the female desire has been policed, demonised and made a taboo for so long. On the other hand, a lot of romance literature focuses on fantasies which have their basis in some very heteronormative and sexist concepts. This raises a question: do women (or the presumed femme coded reader) enjoy them because they enjoy them, or because this is what society has told them to enjoy? Is the romance genre actually just reproducing and perpetuating this harmful societal influence, rather than promoting sexual agency?

This is why when I criticise the misogyny in her writing (and specifically misogyny, diversity is another matter), I criticise SJM and her authorial intent, rather than her readers, because I’m not going to tell people what they should and shouldn’t find enjoyable or sexy in a romance novel. But it is also why people should be willing to see the problematic elements of her writing, because otherwise the harmful sexist ideals it is based in just get thoughtlessly perpetuated. People should be willing to discriminate between what is explicitly a fantasy, and what is outright abuse.

Sexual fantasy vs. abuse

An example in book is the difference between the ‘napkin’ dress scenes in ACOTAR and ACOMAF. In ACOTAR, Feyre is ‘dressed’ and painted against her will, she is humiliated and made into an exhibition involuntarily.

‘They stripped me naked, bathed me roughly, and then - to my horror - began to paint my body [...] the two High Fae ignored my demands to be clothed in something else [...] but held my hands firm when I tried to rip the shift off’ (ACOTAR, p.254)

What follows is a party where Rhys forces her to drink what is essentially drugged wine, and then she dances for him, in a scene that is analogous to date rape. She blacks out and wakes up with only the smudged lines on her body to tell her what she has done, or rather, what has been done to her. Her agency is ripped away from her.

“What happened?”[...] “I don’t think you want to know.” I studied the few smudges on my waist, marks that looked like hands had held me. “Who did that to me?” I asked quietly.’ (ACOTAR, p.259)

To compare, in ACOMAF, Feyre consents to being dressed in order to enter the Court of Nightmares, and willing enters into an exhibitionist scene with Rhys (if under very flimsy plot purposes).

‘I leaned a bit more against him, my legs widening ever so slightly. Why’d you stop? [...] I became the music, and the drums, and the wild, dark thing in the High Lord’s arms.” (ACOMAF, p.414)

‘We were his distraction [...] You and I put on a good show, I said’ (p.415)

This time, the scene is enacted with consent - in fact, her and Rhysand have discussed their actions beforehand and established limits: ‘he’d apologised in advance for it - for this game, these roles we’d have to play’ (p.410). Feyre is the one who makes a choice, she initiates sexual contact, she is sober and has full agency, even when it does not seem that way to their audience.

The latter scene in ACOMAF is, arguably, a dominance fantasy that is carried out with the consent of both parties (three, if you include a reader indulging in the same fantasy). The first isn’t, it is abuse, but somehow it gets painted retrospectively with the same brush.

There is nothing innately wrong in engaging in dominance fantasies, or enjoying a book which perpetuates one. You could even take enjoyment in the ACOTAR version of the dress sequence, if you, as a reader, consent to indulge in it. But please understand, that that is the *reader* who is making that decision, whereas SJM is forcing it on all readers and, in universe, on Feyre.

Why this is problematic: it is not wrong for a reader to feel desire, but an author orchestrates the route that desire takes

The reader can choose to engage in a fantasy (and in this case the word is not explicitly sexual, it can also refer to the escapist elements of ACOTAR, or the romantic nature of Feysand’s relationship), either in spite of the problematic elements or in ignorance of them, and not necessarily be culpable. But it is important to note that, if the reader does accept this in ignorance, it is an ignorance which SJM contributes to, because she normalises problematic behaviours that have become ingrained in society, and also in the culture of heteronormative romance. Rhysand is never called out for the non-consensual public humiliation and things he forced Feyre to do in the first book. It is in fact retrospectively romanticised and made into an act of love:

‘“So we endured it. I made you dress like that so Amarantha wouldn’t suspect, and made you drink the wine so you would not remember the nightly horrors in that mountain [...] I was jealous.” (ACOMAF, p.525)

The repetition of ‘I made’ acknowledges that this behaviour was non-consensual. But all that’s offered is a weak excuse about how it was done as a way of him processing and dealing with his emotions, and it is explained that the act actually protected Feyre (bleugh). Rhysand even admits that he was doing it to ‘get back at Tamlin’ (p.542), reducing Feyre to a territory that is fought over by the two men, something which is never interrogated further - and will no doubt be perpetuated by the plot of ACOWAR.

And this is what ultimately makes me uncomfortable with SJM’s books: not that they have these elements of domination, but that the more sinister aspects are never questioned or challenged. Through the thin and very flimsy plot trickery of ACOMAF, Rhysand is made into a saint, his previous sexual assault explained away, becoming something done to Feyre out of love and for her own good.

And regardless of how you feel about Rhysand as a character, or the quality of his redemption arc, you have to admit that this is particular incident is part of a much more insidious theme in SJM’s writing, where all sexual violence and domineering behaviour becomes normalised to a point where they are explicitly attributed to the innate nature of masculine desire, and of masculinity itself. Rhysand was confused in ACOTAR, he needed to get close to and protect Feyre because of the incipient mating bond, so he has to ‘help’ her without her consent. Tamlin will act aggressively feral when initiating sexual contact, because that’s part of his essential nature as a fae male and a shape shifter. Even though this behaviour is called out in Tamlin, a) it is not done so in the book where it happens, meaning that a reader of ACOTAR alone could see it as an acceptable form of sexual interaction, and b) the connection of this behaviour to his innate nature as a male is never problematised or challenged. Tamlin’s possession and dominance is a ‘wrong’ version of natural fae male behaviour, but this behaviour is still upheld as an ideal. Because what Tamlin does is not that different from how a fae male acts under a mating bond - it’s just that he and Feyre are not mates.

Don’t believe me? Rhysand acts just as possessive and domineering as Tamlin, it’s just that he has the ‘right’ to be, as Feyre’s true mate, under a perfectly natural force he ‘cannot control’...

‘“It’s normal [...] When a couple accepts the mating bond, it’s...overwhelming. Again, harkening back to the beasts we once were. Probably something about ensuring the female was impregnated...males get so volatile that it can be dangerous for them to be in public anyway.” (ACOMAF, p.541)

There is *so much wrong* with this entire concept - for one thing, ascribing biological imperatives to desire and romance is heteronormative as fuck - but the main issue is the way that toxic, violent and ‘volatile’ masculinity is made entirely natural - ingrained into fae males from the beginning of time when they were ‘beasts’. It’s telling that the words ‘beasts’ is used, because it seems that, in the world of this book, men are animals where sex is concerned - another utterly toxic image of masculinity. And this utterly ‘normal’ behaviour is never challenged: Feyre accepts that she is in close proximity to a ‘dangerous’ man without question. Rhysand can’t help being possessive, because he’s mated to Feyre, whereas Tamlin’s possessiveness was bad because he didn’t have the right to be. Why doesn’t Feyre get as violently possessive as Rhys does when their mating bond holds? As far as I can tell, it’s cause she’s a woman, just waiting to get ‘impregnated’.

There is very little difference between this passage and the behaviour that Tamlin has portrayed in ACOMAF to make him become the villain of the piece: dominance, jealousy, possessiveness, a desire to place Feyre in a traditionally feminine role of wife and mother. Yes, Rhys is ‘nicer’ to Feyre than Tamlin is in ACOMAF, but that is arguably an act of clear author intentionality, designed to rewrite his character, and utterly inconsistent with his possessive and sexual actions in ACOTAR. And more importantly, the link between masculinity, sex, and domineering violence remains firmly in place.

Masculinity and dominance are inextricably linked in the ACOTAR series, and this link is never challenged. In both the arc of ACOTAR and ACOMAF masculine dominance is held up as an ideal - even if the ideal of Tamlin is later dismantled to be replaced by Rhys, Rhys’ domineering characteristics are still disassociated from Tamlin’s ‘bad’ example and held up as a positive trait. Furthermore, it is only ever men who are domineering and possessive, unless you count Amarantha, and Ianthe, whose attempts at dominating seduction are always utterly demonised as wrong and intrusive.

‘She’d hounded him relentlessly - stalked the other males, too. [...] She’d be a problem - now or later. He knew it. Kill her now, end the threat before it began, face the wrath of the other High Priestesses, or...see what happened.’ (Ianthe seducing Rhys in ACOMAF, p.233)

Don’t get me wrong, all situations are examples sexual assault - but only the ones perpetuated by women are called out and condemned, and in both cases this is explicitly tied to their bids for power. How many times has ‘stalking’ been used positively in reference to Rhysand’s sexiness? Here, when a woman ‘stalks’, it is seen as wrong. Even if these characters are legitimately evil in-universe (no one is trying to redeem Amarantha), you cannot ignore a trend within the series where male dominance and possessiveness (in the case of Rhys) is excused and actually conceived as the ‘ideal’ relationship, and the same predatory characteristics are coded as villainous and unnatural when presented in women. That is contributing to an offensive and toxic conception of gender, masculinity in particular, and of heterosexual relationships (or, in SJM’s writing, relationships, given that non-het relationships have - at the point of writing - never been explored).

This is also why SJM needs to be called out on her misogyny (among other awful things), regardless of whether you enjoy her books or not. Because she normalises these behaviours, and people will think they’re normal if we don’t decry them. While I actually have no issue with sex being in books aimed at young people (hell, this was kind of the only way young me learnt about these things), I do take issue with representing toxic relationship dynamics as the norm OR THE IDEAL to younger readers, who are unlikely to be certain about what they want or should expect from relationships. She normalises an incredibly sexist dynamic that has men universally characterised as possessive, violent and dominating, and women as passive objects to be fought over. In the case of Feysand, this is repainted in ACOMAF as a narrative of undying and ‘true’ love. Even if you enjoy the books, you *cannot* ignore these implications.

#anti-sjm #essay #critique #emma writes about things #i like talking about books #please don't kill me #this is how I celebrate the ACOWAr release apparently #and yes I do actually like these books #but come on this shit is just weird #anti acotar #anti acomaf #heteronormativity #toxic masculinity

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heysnowflake · 5 years

Text

Yeah I like doing these, shhhh!

1. Five ways to win your heart:

- “I’ve never met anyone like you before”

- Offering to share your food with me

- Be as obsessed with Disney and Non-Disney like me

- Always be really enthusiastic with my dogs

- Laugh at me when I do something ridiculous

2. Something you feel strongly about:

Equality and LGBT+ rights, To quote Dan Howell, “Queer people exist. To choose to ignore them is not an option”. As a heterosexual whose best friend is bisexual, I will god damn fight for her rights to feel accepted, respected and valid in this world in any way I can.

3. Bullet your whole day:

- Take a business call

- Drink a cappuccino

- Do some financial work

- Walk my boss’ dogs

- Get home from work in the earlier afternoon

- Make another cappuccino

- Play some Sims

- Play some Layers of Fear 2

- Tidy my room

- Make dinner

- Read a good book

- Imagine all my dream scenarios that will never happen

- Listen to ASMR and go to sleep

4. A book you love: Goblet of Fire by J.K. Rowling, I’ve read that baby 17 times and I’m debating reading it again.

5. Things you want to say to an ex:

...

6. Your views on mainstream music: Whilst I’ll agree that there some valid and talented individuals in the mainstream music business. I personally just prefer to listen to other things. My main music taste ranges from 80′s movie soundtracks to Disney to Classic Rock. Anything written before 2000, basically.

7. Five pet peeves:

- People who leave their babies/dogs in a hot car without even a window cracked or air con on

- The phrase “I’m living/I’m dying for (insert whatever item here)”

- People who get drunk all the time and/or buy obviously useless items, and then complain about having no money and even trying to borrow money

- Empty packets left in cupboards/fridges

- People who complain clearly for the sake of complaining

8. What you ate today: nothing yet actually, only had a cappuccino

9. How important you think education is: I think education is highly important for reasons such as molding you into an intelligent adult, the lessons you learn from the hidden curriculum, and getting you into a solid career, etc. However, I do believe that there are extremely important subjects that should be taught as a compulsory in educational institutes. Such subjects include home economics, business studies, general life skills, financial management and a more advanced and inclusive sex education programe.

10. Put your music player on shuffle and write the first ten songs that you play:

- W.I.T.C.H (Main theme)

- Paris Holds The Key (To Your Heart)- Anastasia

- Radio Ga Ga- Queen

- Land Of 1000 Dances- Wilson Pickett

- Let Me Be Your Wings- Barry Manilow

- Welcome To The Jungle- Guns N Roses

- Sound The Bugles- Bryan Adams

- Far Away- Nickelback

- Shake Me- Cinderella

- So Close- Jon McLaughlin

11. Your family: I have too many members oh boy, my mum Glenda, my dad Ian, 4 sisters, 3 brothers, 1 brother in law, 13 cousins, 2 aunts, 3 uncles, 2 nieces, 3 nephews, my 3 dogs and little old me (not all in one roof, fuck that)

12. Five guys you find attractive: Hugh Jackman, Benedict Cumberbatch, Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, and Prince Cornelius (animated characters count right?)

13. Your opinion about your body and how comfortable you are with it: As someone who used to be quite overweight when I was younger, it has taken me a long time to learn and accept my body for what it is: just mine. I spent many years comparing myself to other women’s realising that my body would never look like theirs because we’re all built different and no two people are the same in any regard. Whilst I am actually pretty comfortable with my body and who I am (as someone who used to be overweight and now isn’t), there are sure things I wouldn’t mind being changed about my body but they are things for me to change because I want them to and not because of what other people say. It was actually only just recently that I started being more comfortable having my picture taken as I’m someone who gets extremely nervous about not being in control of the picture/editing process of an image of myself. It’s been a slow journey of acceptance but I believe I’m finally at its final stages. Role models such as Carrie Hope Fletcher, Ashley Graham and Kate Winslet have been women I have looked up to during this process and inspire me to a better person every day.

14. What you wore today: black elbow-sleeved top with a scoop neck and tied into a knot at my waist, black leggings and brown ankle boots.

15. Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality: my horoscope/zodiac is Virgo (technically Virgo/Libra cusp as I was born on a cusp day) and my Chinese Zodiac is a Rat. Both are absolutely bloody spot on.

16. Something you always think “what if” about: What if I never met my best friend? It’s a world I don’t like to think about living in but it haunts me every day and I’m thankful for every moment I have with her.

17. Something that you’re proud of: my degree in Business management

18. A problem that you have had: I used to have bad anger management when I was younger than 10 but made a rapid improvement when I was a little older and now can happily say that I’m one of the chillest people I know.

19. Five items you lust after: Cornelius’ ring from Thumbelina (I have yet to find one similar), a brown grand piano, the Canon EOS 1D Mark II camera, a pair of black ugg boots (will most likely purchase soon), more Funko Pops xD

20. Your fears: failure, lots of stairs (have an extremely minor case of Bathmaphobia), and my loved ones dying. Ooooh and also Red-Faced Demon from Insidious

21. How you hope your future will be like: living with my best friend with a couple dogs and cats just taking one day at a time and travelling together.

22. Your academics: GCSEs ranged from A* to Cs and Dinstinctions/Merits, A-Levels ranged from Bs to Cs and Distinctions, University I got Distinctions.

23. Something that you miss: that hangout feeling you get when you walk into school/college/university

24. Five words/phrases that make you laugh: Nincompoop, X Gon’ Give It To Ya, “We’re the reason cousins shouldn’t marry” - Magic Sword: Quest For Camelot, “Would you like the hotel moving an inch to the left?”- Basil Fawlty, and “You should write a book: How to Offend Women in Five Syllables or Less”- The Swan Princess.

25. Something you’re currently worrying about: the fact that I haven’t been able to see my best friend in a month

26. Things you like and dislike about yourself:

Let’s keep it to three each shall we xD

Like: my curly hair, my ability to think outside the box and I can curl a sick present ribbon

Dislike: my inability to be concise, my obvliousness and my arms

27. A quote you try to live by: “Life is too short to live the same day twice”

28. Somewhere you’d like to move to or visit: NEW ZEALAND!!!

29. Five weird things that you like: Vegemite and honey on toast, watching a favourite animated movie multiple times, organising my bookshelf, eating pepperami slces in a very particular way (I eat the outside before the inside), and genuinely enjoy tickling my friend’s feet for ages.

30. One thing you’re excited for: where me and my best friend will travel to next

#Questions #question tag #tag questions

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poppun-chan · 7 years

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The Year of Keroro Challenge Update 6 (Yes Sir)

I’m finally back (^.^) And Sweet Goodness I’m far behind in terms of writing, though at least some of the episodes I have to catch up are already written about

So before we do anything, let’s cover the names of the partner Humans, we all know about the Hinata family’s season themed naming but there’s another neat pattern to find

Fuyuki Hinata: Fuyu=Winter Ki=Shrub (it can be a bush or small tree too), while Hinata means Sunny Place, so his full name in proper order is Sunny Place Winter Shrub

Natsumi Hinata: Natsu=Summer Mi=Beauty, so her full name is Sunny Place Summer Beauty. It’s also worth noting the “Mi” is read that way when paired with another kanji as part of a word, either way it’s a surprising names considering her birthday is in December

Momoka Nishizawa: Momo=Peach, Ka=Blossom, Nishi=West, Zawa=Swamp or Marshland. So her full name is Western Marsh Peach Blossom

Saburo/Mutsumi Houjou: Saburo means third son while for Mutsumi Mutsu=Harmonious Mi=Truth, but considering the meaning of the first kanji it could mean someone who is emotionally close to/on friendly terms with the truth Hou=North Jou=Castle, So his name is Northern Castle Third Son or Northern Castle Harmonious Truth. It’s also worth noting that he uses numbers to write regular name and radio persona name and each is the reverse of the other (Saburo=326, Mutsumi=623)

Koyuki Azumaya: Ko=Small/Little, Yuki=Snow, but together it can mean light snowfall, Azuma=East, Ya=Valley. So her full name is “Eastern Valley Little Snow”

As you can see, the other Humans have a compass direction theme set completed by Alisa Southerncross. During one of the next two sets I’m hoping to cover the Keronians’ forms of “I” and their sentence endings (I may have to split this one up, but the “I” needs to be done before I write about episode 65)

And The Plan Count:

Serious Plans: K66:18 D66:1 MMK:1 TMM:1

Funding Plans: K66:4

It’s a plan, I Swear!: K66:8 (Yes Powered Natsumi falls under this category, I’m fairly sure it was mostly to needle Natsumi & Giroro)

Oh look! Progress!: K66:3

Episode 36: Now I’m curious just how cold it actually gets in this part of Japan during the winter (I know from the Northernmost islands to the Southernmost there’s quite a difference, but most of it is around the temperate zone). I have to admit my reaction to people complaining about the cold on T.V. is more curiousity than anything else since I have a fairly good tolerance for the cold....Not quite because I’m Canadian, mind you, even other Canadians seem a bit surprised by my tolerance for the cold (though it bothers me more when it’s only slightly cold, so that raining cold from the fall actually bothers me much more than the cold in mid-winter when the snow is two feet deep).

Also why does Tamama care about how big his bonus is? He can basically buy whatever he wants regardless (Though given what we learn in episode 40, it does seem weird they get paid so little). And it’s a bit surprising that Dororo isn’t the one in the old fashioned straw snow suit.

Episode 37: I feel in a way the first half of this episode illustrates most cases where you go to teach something that people have a certain image of and they expect what they see in movies and T.V. shows instead of what the thing you’re teaching actually is or at best expect to be doing the advanced things right away. Part b was also a bit surprising in terms of the range of emotions it runs through since at first it doesn’t seem like it would go in that direction at all; it starts off with a sort of Jurassic Park premise but actually ends up surprisingly sweet at times.

Episode 38: So apparently the opening shot with Sumomo is quite famous as one of the strangest anime gifs ever, hmm. Alright I’m going to admit, I think I’ve only seen this one once before and I know Giroro & Natsumi is a really popular pairing for the series and it’s not that I dislike it but I don’t really have any strong feelings about it or a lot to say about this episode.

Except that I’m fairly sure that password was chosen specifically to embarrass Giroro, and that the bit about the apron might tie into how Geisha would leave a small portion of the back of their necks unpainted because it suggested the bare skin under their make-up (It’s been a while since I read the book it’s from).

Episode 39: I’m going to admit that I really like Japan’s “Always been fun” Christmas, in some ways more than what we have here; namely because here there are a lot of people who have trouble with Christmas because it went from having a lot of emotional meaning to being commercial and Japanese Christmas seems to be in a nice middle ground where it never had the meaning it used to for Westerners, but didn’t go the other way either. Or maybe it’s more commercial than I think, either way the episode is really sweet and charming.

As for part b. I know about the Japanese tradition of having a big clean up around the end of the year to have a fresh start in the new year, but I have to wonder if having Fuyuki throw out those books was really necessary. I know my books don’t really fill the entirety of their space on my bookselves and you can fit more books or even an entire second row behind them, and Japanese books are generally much smaller than Western ones (probably because it take fewer characters to say what you need to) plus there’s all that space in the secret base. Long story short, I sort of like to think that Keroro didn’t actually throw out Fuyuki’s books (or at the very least took them out of the trash) and sold them to Momoka to make up for getting such a small bonus

Episode 40: It’s the News Years episode! And goodness it’s different from it’s manga counterpart, really, really different. Now in a way I can understand why they changed it; even though children’s anime have no problem showing adult characters getting drunk (Ojamajo Doremi actually has a few episodes where the girls’ magic teacher/mascot is shown using alcohol as an emotional crutch when she loses ownership of her store), minors are a different matter entirely and in this case it’s a bit of a grey area since Mois’ Human form is based on a girl who is either in high school or late middle school and we don’t know what stage she’s in in terms of her own species, the latter sort of applies to Tamama as well. Actually, speaking of the manga, there’s a good bit that seems to either have been dropped from the earlier chapters or possibly was part of some trial and error process; I know the first few volumes included a chart that shows Giroro’s organs as including a reactor and they had an interview with Tamama which, along with a few other moments makes it almost seem as if he was originally planned to have some form of hypopituitarism, the one that keeps you from aging normally....

Moving right along, the kite bit is a pun on kite & octopus both being pronounced “tako” (this isn’t the first show to do this pun) and the “Tamaya!” is something that’s commonly done when fireworks are launched (Though some shout “Kagiya!”); it started as the result of a competition between two firework making rivals to make the most spectacular fireworks, each would call out his own surname every time one of his fireworks was launched.

Also sweet goodness this episode got a bit meta, possibly more than the one where they make anime.

Episode 41: I’m really curious about sugoroku, I’ve never actually seen a normal version of the game; not simply I’ve only seen it in T.V. shows where the game is enhanced by either magic or technology and has you do things that normally wouldn’t be possible or practical, even the versions I’ve seen that are regular board games are always themed.

Dororo’s story was quite nice, though it’s a bit funny that 556 misremembered his name as “Terere”, “Tereyasan” means “Shy Person” (”Tere” being what marks it as “shy”) it’s also really close to his name if you look at a syllable chart (both are one place off from where the right one is). Either way it was really nice seeing him get the spotlight and be noticed for once, even if it was short lived (though I wonder why when all of them lost their footing none of them tried to grab the cliff face again).

Episode 42 (I’m warning you now, this one is about to get weird):

♪Viva the beautiful game, it’s what saturdays are for. Ooh! Ah! The triumph and pain. Work to live, but live to score. We’re on our way now! To Wemberly~ Up for the cup it’s the classical game, the marvellous game. Thank Frog for football~♪

Actually my opinions on soccer aren’t especially strong either way, I just really love musicals (This one is called “The Boys in the Photograph” which is an updated version of “The Beautiful Game” but with a happier ending)

Now part 2 is adorable but rewatching it left me wondering, how exactly does the timing of this episode work? To clarify the opening scene shows this episode starts directly after part one with Keroro being punished for losing the game (how is the barbed wire actually working by the way? Keronian hands are small enough to fit between the barbed section) but then it seems an entire winter goes by over the course of this episode, one where he goes to the park every day in case the boy comes back; even if we go by the snow actually holding and not being the very first snowfall of the year and taking place after the Natsumi Birthday episode and ending before valentines day when there clearly was no snow on the ground, that still leaves a lot of episodes where Tamama would have gone to the park at some point that day and there are a few where I have to wonder when he had the time to do that.

Even if we say that the episode started in fall 2004 the opening of the first part mentions the approach of spring so that would mean feeling the approach of spring before winter even starts....Or was that snow just a random one from that weird point where it can snow and hold for a few weeks, but the bulk of snow from the winter melted earlier?

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