#just saw a patronizing post going around and felt like i should contribute something helpful

[mordcore]

some friendly advice for friends of smokers: we know about the health risks. we are allowed make our own choices. if a smoker says they want to quit you can help them with it but if they don't, patronizing us won't help, just drive us away. this goes for any addiction btw.

#just saw a patronizing post going around and felt like i should contribute something helpful #i struggle with this too but u gotta realize that addicts still deserve autonomy! #the right to make bad choices etc #maybe somewhere in the world exists an addict who wants to be patronized about it but i havent met them yet #smoking #my stuff #addiction

[angstsfordays]

Beautiful Pain (7)

Chapter Seven- Gone

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced! Reader

Summary: Post-Blip, you started to feel lost when most of the Avengers team are gone. Coping with your loss, you still find hope in the connection with your remaining friends. However, it is not easy as everyone is trying to figure their lives after the Blip.

Having a long history with Bucky ever since you both saved each other from Hydra, you were still glad you had Bucky after all this time. However, as you try to give Bucky space to find himself after being pardoned for his past, you start to wonder if you should ever cross the line of friendship before it’s too late.

That thought might have to be put on hold though, when you, Sam and Bucky find yourselves having to deal with threats that continue to rise in a post-Blip world.

Chapter synopsis: In your pursuit of Karli and her group, unexpected revelations come to light. Lines are now crossed and that there is no turning back.

Warnings: Violence. Angst. A bit of language. Maybe a tear-inducing moment?

Word count: 5k

Notes: In celebration of the last ep, today is a double release! 🥳 We are already at the 7th chapter of this series. It also has covered one of the most climactic episodes of the TFATWS series and wow, I can't believe we are here! 😱

I have yet to see the last episode but I have plans to do it tonight. I thought I could put it off until I finish writing for ep 5 but I couldn't wait. This would help me to plan the direction I want to come for the upcoming chapters. 😌 Hope y’all will stick to this series despite the show has ended. 😅

Please let me know what you think of the series so far! 🥰🙏🏼

The tag list is still open! Let me know if you want to join with a message or comment in the chapters!

Previous: Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six |

Next: Chapter Eight

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With Zemo’s inside information, all of you were heading to Donya’s ceremony in hopes to find Karli. You weren’t sure what to do knowing that you had secured a possible chance with Dovich to talk to Karli.

Grabbing your blazer, you made the move to join your group when you were greeted by the sight of John and Lemar walking towards you all.

“Karli Morgenthau is too dangerous for you to pull this shit.” John thought it fit to lecture your group. You were walking beside Sam when you heard Bucky sarcastically questioning John on how he managed to locate your group.

All of your annoyance grew as John decided he doesn’t want to miss out on the action given his new status and hence, responsibility as- urgh you don’t even want to say call him that title in your head.

“Come on, man. You don’t think three Avengers can walk around Latvia without drawing too much attention?” Lemar responded in kind.

John in all his fear of missing out started to question why you all had broken Zemo out of prison. Bucky patronizingly mentioned that Zemo broke himself out technically but John grew more irritated at not being taken seriously.

John’s higher than thou self was drawing attention with his loud talk and Sam had to cut him off. Zemo explained that he knew of Karli’s location and indicated continuing on his tracks before being stopped by John.

Sam went on ahead to explain that Karli would most likely be at Donya’s memorial and interception would take place there. Lemar noted the risks of casualties give n that civilians would be present.

John seeming pleased with the information started talking of a plan to take Karli in by surprise. This plan of ambush didn’t sit well with Sam and he proposed to talk to her alone. John refused, saying he didn’t want the possibility of losing Karli again.

Sam countered back that it was the best timing to reason with her, as she was now feeling vulnerable with someone dear to her loss. John vehemently rebuffed Sam’s proposal and claimed that reasoning with Karli was not an option, given that she had bombed a building with people in it.

Lemar, who you observed to be more level-headed than John ever would be chimed in that Sam could be attacked without any backup.

“And if I go in hot and the ops go wrong, more people will die,” Sam stated firmly.

“Sam is right.” Everyone turned to you and you continued to speak. “Look-” You shook in disbelief as you were about to break the promise you had with Dovich but you knew the situation called for it.

“I met with one of Karli’s guys.” All of the men were stunned at your revelation and you could see the betrayal on Bucky’s face more so than the rest.

“When was this?” He spoke up first as he looked on at you in disappointment.

“When we were out fishing for information on Donya, I miraculously spotted him on the streets and followed him. We talked.”

“And you didn’t bring him in?!” John accused as if you had done something terribly wrong. Bucky turned to give John the stink eye before going back to you.

“Why would you keep this from us at all?” Bucky couldn’t believe that you would have kept this information from him of all of the people.

“I promised him, he was going to talk to Karli for me after the memorial. He was our best chance to persuade Karli rather than go in by ourselves. We might not even have a shot.” You defended your actions.

“And how was he so agreeable to your request?” Bucky asked disdainfully. You didn’t like his judgmental stare at you, like as if he couldn’t believe you managed this feat.

“I saved him before back when we all fought the Flag Smashers on the truck. I convinced him with sincerity, happy?” You snapped back at the brooding super-soldier. Sam witnessing the once again tense exchange between the two of you intervened and spoke.

“That’s good, Y/N. Well done.”

“He said that he would only have me speak to Karli but I think you should do it, Sam. I can do talk to him again once he contacts me. You are the best one of us to do it.” You knew of Sam’s experiencing with counselling soldiers dealing with trauma and knew that he would do a better job to talk to Karli.

Sam was encouraged at your support for him and pulled you into a side hug which you returned gladly to him too. Bucky grew irritated at how your relationship with him was continuing to sour and began to feel disheartened. John being the thorn in your side still did not relent in his opinion.

“Are you gonna let your partner walk into a room with a super-soldier alone?” John continued to harp on the matter.

“He dealt with worse and he’s not my partner.” Bucky curtly answered.

“I trust Sam, he’s more capable than you think.” You chimed in. Bucky gave you a brief warm look as the two of you had put your differences aside for a moment to agree on Sam’s competency.

When Lemar asked John to give this plan a chance, you could see the latter wavering on his stance. It seemed his soft spot for his partner and friend worked. The men still thought it was better to go for the memorial straight as they were not sure if Dovich could hold up his end of the promise.

You showed hesitation but decided to give in, knowing that you were outnumbered. Zemo led the group to approach a little girl and you could see him giving some money to the girl in exchange for the revelation of Donya’s memorial.

You all were soon directed to an old building and the little girl pointed up to a stairway before going off. Sam gave you a nod before making his way first.

John took it upon himself to cuff Zemo before stopping Sam, informing him that he only had ten minutes with Karli. You had it with his bossy attitude and wanted to throw a punch in his face.

As the time passed in the room, it was silent. Everyone took a spot to wait but John was pacing up and down. Bucky positioned himself near the door while you took a spot opposite Lemar.

Your eyes glanced nervously to Bucky, suddenly feeling all weird and awkward. You never had this feeling in a long time. The only time you felt his way was when you had just started living with him as you two were on the run and in hiding.

The sudden comfort and ease you had with him seemed to vanish with your first fight as you would call it.

“Hey, uh-now it’s not really the time…” Your attention to Lemar who was now speaking at you directly. Giving a surprising look at his unexpected conversation starter, you listened intently.

“I really am a fan of yours.” Your mouth opened slightly in surprise at his revelation. Tilting your head to the side, you gave him a quizzical look.

“Just thought your powers are really cool. I was amazed to see them in action back in Germany.” You weren’t sure how to react but nodded shyly and thanked him. Bucky couldn’t believe what transgressed in front of him.

Peering over to see you with a bashful expression, he couldn’t help to grow irritated out of jealousy.

“Were you born with them?” Lemar inquired politely and you nodded in response. Lemar had another look of wonder before continuing to ask.

“That’s extraordinary.” You shrugged your shoulders as you didn’t know what to respond. Sure, you know your powers were to be envied but you didn’t think of yourself holier.

“It’s nothing to be envied. I find more respect for people who are able to do extraordinary things without such advantages.“ Your humility gained a deepened sense of admiration from Lemar. “Thank you for your service.” Throwing a smile in his way, yours grew wider as Lemar returned one your way.

Eyes looking over to John, you gave a slight brief nod before looking away. You also had to acknowledge his contributions but you didn’t like him as much so that was the best you could do.

Minutes passed again before John grew more impatient by the second.

“No no no, this is a bad idea.” He started whispering to himself as he shook his head fervently.

“It hasn’t been ten minutes, John. Just sit tight.” Bucky noted with a huff.

“Don’t patronize me.” You could see John getting fed up with Bucky. Walking towards the other end of the room from where Bucky was, John stood to look at the clock and you saw the determination in his eyes. “That’s it. I am going in.”

“Woah, back down mister. You’re being too rash.” Moving to the side to block his path, you held up a hand to stop him from moving.

“And you’re being too relaxed.” He seethed impatiently at your interception. As his hands laid on your shoulders to move you physically, Bucky immediately went to snatch his hand away.

You felt yourself being shifted backwards and towards Bucky before he took a step in front of you. Both men puffed up their chests in dominance and looked at each other with distaste.

“This is all really easy for you two, isn’t it?” John’s eyes moved to yours before landing back at Bucky. “All those serum and powers running through your veins…”

“Your partner needs backup in there. Are you really going to have Sam’s blood on your hands?” John enunciated each word of his last sentence strongly to pressure you.

In a matter of seconds, John looked at the opening Bucky gave when he came to protect you and went for it. He quickly made his way to where Sam and Karli were.

You saw the look of distraught and betrayal on Karli’s face before she lunged for John and knocked him and Sam over. She immediately made a run for it with Bucky hot on her trail. Helping Sam up, you two made your way to back Bucky up.

The big building was an unfamiliar maze and the three of you tried to find Karli’s location. Hearing the sounds of crashing and gunshots, you all tried your best to follow the sounds to the exact location.

When you arrived at the door, you opened it to see Zemo knocked out cold on the floor. John was already at the scene and Lemar just joined a few moments later. The little pieces of glass with unknown blue residues confirmed your suspicions on what they were.

Oh god.

-------------------------//---------------------------

“I deal with the power broker when the time comes,” Karli reassured the two men were worried about fighting two wars with both the power broker and Sam’s group.

“And I know a way we can deal with Sam without getting involved in a direct fight.” Karli intended. Nico and Dovich exchanged a brief look before Dovich asked how they were able to do so.

“We separate them. And then we kill Captain America.” Karli’s intentions didn’t sit well with Nico but he maintained a neutral expression. Dovich sat on the thought for a moment and remembered about you

“Hey look, Sam’s group is an odd mix but I don’t think they mean any harm. Except for Zemo, of course.”

With furrowed brows, Karli indicated for Dovich to explain himself. Dovich decided to speak about the earlier encounter he had with the Avenger.

“I talked with Y/N prior and she promised that she didn’t want any bloodshed.” Karli scoffed at her friend’s words and shook her head in disbelief. How was Dovich so trustful of you?

“That’s what Sam said too. But guess how it turned out.” She retorted with her own example to show how your group couldn’t be trusted.

“She’s not like that. I believe her, she can be trusted.” Dovich insisted. Karli and Nico were curious as to why was their friend was pushing for you.

“What’s gotten into you, Dovich? Why are you defending her?”

“Karli, she saved my life back in Germany. Her actions then spoke louder given she only met us for the first time.”

“She’s still loyal to her group. She’s loyal to the Avengers.” Karli continued to put down Dovich’s vouch for you. He then decided to change his tactics.

“I think she can be convinced to join our group. Imagine if she stood on our side, we would be unstoppable.” Karli looked up in interest as she considered the possibility of you fighting for their cause. Indeed, with your powers, the Flag Smashers would become a force to be reckoned with.

“That’s impossible.” Karli tried to reason with the fact that you were still with the enemy and you wouldn’t be turned so easily. She knew of your history and how you were loyal to a fault for Bucky Barnes. Would you so easily leave your friends to join them?

“She empathises with our cause. She said so herself.” Dovich added in finality, hoping that Karli could be convinced.

“Hmm, we’ll see about that.”

-------------------------//---------------------------

Your head was spinning from earlier events and you came back to the common room once you had a quick shut-eye upstairs. You could hear Bucky and Sam bantering about the same old topic on Steve’s shield.

You also heard Bucky’s comments about Walker and shook your head in disbelief at how inherently frustrating the man was. What could have been a successful peace talk with Karli was ruined by his brashness to display his authority.

The door burst open behind you and you looked over to see John coming in with Lemar, demanding for all of you to turn Zemo in. Sam took charge of the situation and put John in his place, stating he had been nothing but a thwart in your plans.

John being the arrogant pick he was tried to size up Sam, mocking him by saying he could put down the shield to make it fair for the both of them. You were fuming with the blatant disrespect that John was showing.

Before you could take another step, a familiar spear swooped in and lodged itself in the pillar near John. The familiar sounds of metal clanging let you know who was arriving and you saw familiar Dora Milajae members walking into the room.

Understanding the Wakandan words that were being spoken, you knew the Dora Milajae were here for Zemo.

John being the arrogant prick that he was, was proud to introduce himself as Captain America. An awkward silence ensued when they didn’t return a response. Sam tried to help John out by advising him that he should be careful to step on the Dora Milajae’s toes.

Ignoring Sam’s words, John went on to tell the Dora Milajae that they had no jurisdictions it had little effect when Ayo refuted his claims. Seeing John scoff before taking a step towards Ayo to place his hand on her shoulder, you immediately winced once Ayo swiftly knocked John down in three moves.

The scene in front of you unfolded quickly as John were quick to fight against the Dora Milajae and Lemar even stepped in to help his partner out. Seeing how the two men were hopelessly struggling with the warriors caused you to cringe in embarrassment.

“We should do something,” Sam said as he had the same sentiments as you.

“Looking strong, John.” Bucky commentated sarcastically with his arms crossed as if he was fine with how things were.

“Bucky….” Sam said in a nagging tone, as if Bucky was a child who did not want to do his chores. You looked over to give him a nod to say that Bucky should indeed step in before John really gets pummelled.

“Ayo, let’s talk about this”. Bucky stepped forward to intervene. Looking to the side, you saw one of the Dora aiming to give Lemar a blow before Sam stepped in. She managed to knock Sam down onto the couch and you knew it was your chance to step up.

You refused to use your powers with the Doras so you held your hands up to negotiate with them.

“Spare him, please.” You pleaded on Lemar’s behalf. The Dora withheld her weapon as she looked over you, recognising you from your Wakandan days. She left you

A sound of metal dropping caught your attention as you saw Bucky’s arm falling limply on the ground. His astonished expression accompanied by pain at Ayo’s disarm of his arm also brought you a shock.

In the midst of the chaos, you found that Zemo had disappeared. Ayo went to open the bathroom door and checked the room. She stated that Zemo was gone.

Ayo stated that their business was finished here and they would take their leave first. You helped Lemar up before walking over to Bucky who picked up his vibranium arm in disbelief.

“Did you know they could do that?” Sam asked and Bucky shook his head in response. You bit your lips as you weren’t sure what to say.

In an attempt to comfort him, you reached over to give his shoulder a squeeze. Bucky was glad that your previous enmity towards him seemed to be gone and your interactions seemed to be back to normal.

“They were not even super soldiers.” Hearing John’s dismay at his utter defeat, you almost felt bad for him. Sam gave him a once over as John stood up, acting he was fine before leaving with Lemar.

The three of you left couldn’t believe Zemo made his grand escape even with all of you in the room.

-------------------------//---------------------------

The three of you were making your way out in search of Zemo until Sam received a call from his sister. Apparently, Karli called Sarah as a strong message to Sam. Karli threatened to involve Sam’s nephews if Sam didn’t do as she said.

Your head shook in disbelief, you believed Karli to be different. To hear that she was pulling such a tactic changed your initial opinion of her. Sam received a message to meet her alone but you and Bucky wouldn’t let him go in alone.

Once the three of you suited up, you all made your way to the location. Entering the open plaza in the building, Sam called for Karli and you saw her head popped into view. You all made your way to her level.

You let Sam approached her while Bucky and you put yourselves at the side. Sam called her out for trying to involve his family but Karli replied that she would never harm them. Her eyes moved to where you and Bucky stood, noting aloud that Sam didn’t come alone as intended.

Karli reiterated that she never wanted to hurt Sam and that he was just a tool in the regimes she vowed to destroy. Killing Sam would be meaningless to her.

“I was gonna ask you to join me. And maybe Y/N back there. Dovich has spoken highly of you.” Seeing your eyes widened in surprise at the offer, Karli smirked before continuing.

“You could do better than them. You would be welcomed and appreciated within our circle. I know of your loss, your grief with the rest of your original team gone. You can find purpose with us.” You stepped forward as if her words were drawing you in.

Sam and Bucky were at a sudden loss at your movement. They didn’t think you would even process Karli’s proposal and were curious to know what you were about to do.

“Karli, I resonate with your cause.” Your words took your friends by surprise. Were you really going to switch sides?

“But I don’t approve of what you did back at the depot. I thought better of you.” You expressed your stance on the matter. Karli scoffed before giving her reply. “Don’t give me that. I don’t need your approval.”

“Shedding blood is never an option for me.” You stood your ground firmly.

“Fine, I admit my mistake. If you join us, I will make sure there would not be lives cost.” Karli tried to coat her words in favour of you.

She knew that she would do whatever was necessary for her to achieve her goals and even if it were to pretend to pander to your moral values, she was willing to give it a try if it meant she could have you switch sides.

Seeing your conflicted dilemma, Karli egged on. “Is it because of him?” She nodded back to Bucky. You looked over your shoulder to see him equally You looked at her with a perplexed look before she smirked once more.

“I read up about you. You came into his defence when he was accused of a crime he didn’t commit. You revealed your powers publicly and that got you thrown into the raft. Ever since he has been pardoned, you had been with him all this time.” You didn’t know where Karli was going with this but her next sentence finally made you understood.

“This only means one thing. You like him, don’t you? He’s the one holding you back.”

“No! What are you talking about?” You spoke through gritted teeth at how she chose to play this out. How could she expose you like this? Your ears burned with embarrassment at the revelation that stunned both Sam and Bucky.

What was Karli implying exactly? Bucky looked over to see you visibly shaking in anger and he was taken aback by how Karli’s words affected you.

“Even now, I see the way you are looking at him. At how angry you are now? You mad that your secret crush is out in the open?” You looked up to see Karli’s smug face and you controlled your energy from bursting through your hands.

“Stop your bullshit. Don’t act like you know me!”

“Please, I am letting you know that he is not worth it. You would do so much better for yourself if you join our cause.” Karli retorted and you hated how she acted like she knew what was best for you when she barely knew her.

Sam always had an inkling that there could be more from your relationship with Bucky but he kept silent on the matter out of respect. He knew that it was best to leave you figuring things out on your own.

He recalled how he had caught you and Bucky in an intimate moment back in the club at Madripoor and figured you two were more than it seemed on a friendship level.

Seeing Karli use such an approach to almost taunting you in the context of persuasion didn’t sit well with him. His inner big brother wanted to come out to defend you.

Meanwhile, Bucky was appalled to learn of everything from your exchange with Karli. Was it possible that you had liked him all this while?

When he talked to you about Madripoor earlier, he remembered your pained expression when he tried to void what happened between the two of you.

Was it because you were hurt by his denial? He must have sounded like the world’s biggest jerk. If you really liked him, he would imagine you being heartbroken from what he had said.

“He is worth everything.” Your very statement made Bucky looked back up in shock. No way would he ever thought you would like him in that way. He thought you were just being the kind-hearted and empathetic person that you always are to follow a guy like him.

Quick flashbacks came to him as he realized that you had always been by his side from breaking free of HYDRA to being on the run, following the Avengers civil war, his time in Wakanda, the fight with Thanos, Steve's leaving, his pardon after the Blip and up to now.

It dawned upon Bucky that he had taken you for granted. If you were gone right now, he could only imagine that he would possibly go the deep end.

“He is the most important person in my life and you don’t get to talk about him like that when you don’t even know him.” You asserted with renewed confidence. You figured while this situation wasn't ideal, it was the moment you had to tell your truth.

Looking back, you met Bucky with a small smile.

Bucky’s heart soared at what you had just said. To be regarded as your most important person was the thing that he never knew he needed.

You knew that your words inadvertently had answered the pressing question on Bucky’s mind. Karli knew she had failed to get to you after the answer and decided to lose her shot with you.

You hear Sam picking up something on his comms, stating that it was Walker. Karli was alerted and decided to make a move first. Bucky immediately jumped off as soon as he saw Karli doing the same.

You lifted yourself off and saw Sam knocking Karli over before he turned to Bucky, telling him that he would send him the location. You didn’t have time to say anything to Bucky, he only gave you a look of understanding before you both knew that there were more pressing matters at hand.

Sam nodded to you before you did the same and you followed him as he took off.

-------------------------//---------------------------

You sent a blast towards the glass ceiling before you and Sam landed in the building. A crash was heard next when you recognised Dovich to be the one that was crashing. You looked to see John walking into view and your mind scrambled to analyse what was going on.

Dovich went ahead to use a metal pipe against John, but John pushed back and even bent the pipe into half like a rubber hose.

“Oh shit,” Dovich uttered before John sent him flying to where you stood. As Dovich looked up at you, you eyed him to go and heard Sam speak up.

“What did you do?” John didn’t answer the question and informed that the Flag Smashers had Lemar. Growing a soft spot despite your brief interaction, your heart dropped when you realised that Lemar was in danger.

John went ahead first before Sam followed behind. You placed your hand on Sam’s arm to pause for a moment, looking at Sam anxiously.

“Sam, I think he took one of the serums.” He nodded grimly at your words, indicating that he shared the thought too.

The two of you followed John where you were all ambushed by a member of the Flag Smashers. All of you tried to fend yourselves and you soon see Bucky joining the scene.

You were met face to face with Dovich. You gave him a look that said you were reluctant but had no choice to fight him.

He took you on and you tried your best to avoid his quick moves. You shot multiple non-fatal blasts at him to knock him over. He was doing his best to keep up with the speed at which you were throwing your blasts.

In the next split second, you sent two direct blasts to his chest that knocked the wind out of his chest. The following moment, you heard a loud collision and you looked to see Lemar crashed against a stone pillar.

A loud gasp escaped your lips as you realised what had just happened. Lemar’s head fell slightly as you saw him lost consciousness. John immediately walked over to his partner and repeatedly tap him to wake him up.

You swallowed heavily as seconds passed and Lemar had no reaction. John called Lemar’s name over and over to no avail. You see John looking back his shoulder and directing his line of sight on you.

“Do something!” He cried out to you. You were at a loss for words as you didn’t know what he wanted you to do. You looked over to see Sam and Bucky equally stunned at what had occurred.

“I read your file. You brought someone back to life before!” You knew what John was referring to but you didn’t know if it could even work.

“I can’t, my powers don’t work like that-” Your powers came from your life force so you were able to transfer it to someone to regain theirs. However, you only did it once and it was because someone was dying of hypothermia. It was a different situation from Lemar’s.

“Please! I’m begging you! He’s everything to me!” John’s desperate plea touched you, knowing that he had said similar words to what you had said before about Bucky. You understood his plight and made quick steps to where he was.

Everyone looked upon the scene as you crouched down to your knees. You gave John a wary look before you brought your hands to Lemar who was lying in John’s arms.

Summoning your energy into your palms, you placed them on Lemar’s chest as if you were using a defibrillator. You pumped several sets of energy into Lemar while John patted him for a reaction.

When Lemar still showed no signs of life, the look of defeat on John’s face broke your heart. Tears start welling in your eyes as you looked at Lemar’s lifeless body. You saw Karli and her group starting to make a run for it.

Sam and Bucky made a chase for her immediately. John handed Lemar over to you before he sprinted for the window in front of you.

You could see the look of vengeance on his face and knew it didn’t bode well. You gently laid Lemar on the ground before waving your hand with your energy flames and placed it on where his heart was.

Rest in peace.

Your energy flames dissipated into his uniform and you stood up to follow behind John. You managed to catch him chasing after one of the Flag Smashers ahead of you. He was throwing his shield with brute force to knock the guy on his feet. You saw how the man was pleading for his life, claiming that he was not the one who killed Lemar.

John placed a foot to hold the man who was flailing his arms desperately. In a blink of an eye, he brought down the very shield that was used to protect people onto the man.

“NOOOOOOO!” You cried out in an attempt for John to stop his actions but it was too late.

Your eyes widened in unbelievable shock at what just transpired. When John lifted up the shield, you saw the blood that stained the legacy of the shield- Steve’s legacy.

You turned to see that a crowd was formed and people held out their phones to record what had happened. It didn’t sit well with you to know that in a matter of seconds, the whole world would also be watching this horrific scene too.

-------------------------//---------------------------

Tag list: @tanyaherondale @spookycereal-s @cataves @archaeoheart @conflicted-noxsirius @archaeoheart @idiotinnit @anxious-stitcher @lindseyrae20 @mads-weasley

#bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #marvel fanfiction #beautiful pain #angstsfordays #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes

[jasonrae117]

This is my first post on Tumblr. I have an ongoing story on fanfiction but I felt like trying something new. I was heavily inspired by @flyingkiki because timrae is too good of a pairing and there needs to be more stories. This is my contribution. I will be using songs throughout since its a band au but only this first chapter will have the whole song typed out. Furthermore all songs in this story exist in our world but for sake of my storytelling some will be "written" as originals by the character while others still belong to their respective artist which I will note.

For part one:

1.Dear Society- Madison Beer (As is)

2. Ribs - Lorde (As is)

3. Like That - Bea Miller and Aurora (Intended as band original)

4. COPYCAT - Billie Eilish (intended as band original)

Bad Idea, Good Intentions 

Part 1

Tim wondered why he found himself at a club on this Saturday night. Him and his friends had just graduated with their bachelor's degree in their respective fields and they convinced him to celebrate with them at this club.

By 'friends' he meant primarily his best friend Connor. The other two guys were more of Connor's friends than his but Tim knew them well enough to consider them his too. However, Connor had called him the day before and practically begged Tim to come. Apparently there was this new band that he knew the drummer and this was their highest profile gig yet and Connor wanted to support his friend by bringing whoever he could. Tim reluctantly agreed, feeling like he should get out more and spend time with his friends outside of college.

Tim already felt like this was a bad idea when he walked into a packed club with flashing lights, a fully stocked bar, and a large stage. 

"Tim! You made it!" Connor walked over to him and gave him a one armed hug as the other was occupied holding a half empty pint of beer. 

Tim smiled at his long time best friend. "Of course buddy, I keep my promises."

Connor dragged him over to the bar where their other friends Garfield and Garth were sitting. Both greeted him with cheers and hugs.

"Dude, this place is fucking great! So many hot girls!"

"Good God Gar, can you keep it in your pants for one freaking night?" Garth shoved the blond playfully and took a sip of his drink.

"What can I say, the ladies love me. I just wish your stupid band played something easier to dance to." Gar crossed his arms and glared at the stage where the four person band was performing.

"This is your friend's band?" Tim directed at Connor.

"Yeah, this is Nevermore! Wally West is the drummer. Jinx is on bass, Argent is keyboard, and Raven is the lead singer and guitarist." He pointed to each of the members.

"What the hell kind of names are those. That Raven girl already has a creepy vibe and she chooses a name like that? What's with the Edgar Allan Poe obsession?" Garfield looked bewildered and shook his head.

"I'm shocked you even know who that is. But dude, it's just their stage names."

Tim looked back to Connor wanting to know more about the band that made him come here. "What are their real names?"

"I don't know." Connor shrugged.

"Are they single?" Garth had asked grinning.

"I don't know about the other two, but don't even try with Jinx, that's Wally's girl." 

The guys entered a discussion about Connor's and Wally's friendship and what his stage name was. Tim heard it was something like Kid Flash but he wasn't paying too much attention. He was focused on the band onstage. 

The song sounded familiar but Tim wasn't big on music. Each member seemed to have their unique style and color but they all worked well together. Wally was wearing yellows, Jinx wore black and hot pink striped knee high socks with a short leather skirt and black mesh top. Her hair was dyed entirely bubble gum pink and wrapped up in two space buns. Argent had black hair with red highlights running through it and an all black outfit with a studded leather jacket. The lead singer, Raven, really caught his eye. She has a short purple bob that fell to just below her chin. 

Her outfit is what really had his mind stopping. She had on a black long sleeved ribbed shirt with a large keyhole neckline, showing off the tops of her full breasts, which was tucked into royal blue shorts that seemed to be barely long enough to even be classified as shorts with frayed edges. Her legs were encased in black fishnet stocking ending in a chunky heeled combat boot. Tim liked to think of himself as a gentleman that Alfred would be proud of but...the woman was hot. She had an hourglass figure but probably the best set of legs and ass he's ever seen. She was almost unreal how incredible she looked. 

The banter of his friends regained his attention as the band switched to another song. 

"Hey fellas, let's go hit the floor, this song is much better!" Garth and Connor finished their drinks and placed them on the bar agreeing to Garfield's request. They looked to Tim when he didn't move. 

"You guys go ahead, I'll be there in a second. I haven't even gotten a single drink in."

Connor threw an arm around him. "That's what happens when you arrive late." He ruffled his hair a bit. "Alright man, we'll try to find a spot close to the stage. See you there." 

With that his friends mingled within the crowd. Tim turned to the bar and ordered a bourbon on the rocks, he wasn't great in heavily social settings like this so he needed to calm his mind a bit. As he waited, his focus returned to the band.

They were actually really good. While he was slightly confused since their music was slower than he expected, the songs themselves were great. The lead singer had a lower voice of an alto but in the next song they started, it was clear she had a wider range. It was smooth when it needed to be but raspy and gritty, adding to the unique sound. The other girls added to the dynamic with their higher notes and he found he really liked it. 

The slow beat of their next song reverberated around the bar, drawing everyone in, particularly Tim. He moved from his spot at the countertop to one of the metal standing tables that was currently unoccupied. It stood to the mid-right of the stage with a small gathering of dancing patrons between him and the stage. He gently placed his hand that held the almost empty glass of bourbon on the surface of the table as he leaned into it. 

The lead singer Raven, he recalled from Gar's description earlier, slowly grasped the microphone. One delicate hand curled around the mic while the other laid gently in the supporting pole. Her almost raspy voice fluttered through the speakers.

 

Don't be cautious, don't be kind

You committed, I'm your crime

The low octave sounded almost sensual and her hand slid down the pole in time with the held note.

Push my button anytime

You got your finger on the trigger, but your trigger finger's mine

Her left hand formed into the shape of a gun and as she 'pulled the trigger' she collapsed her hand save for her single index finger that she spun slowly in a circle. Tim grinned at the small gesture representing being wrapped around one's finger and he couldn't pull his eyes away from how delicate and smooth her hands were. Even from the distance he sat she looked flawless.

Silver dollar, golden flame

Dirty water, poison rain

Perfect murder, take your aim

I don't belong to anyone, but everybody knows my name

Raven removed the microphone from the stand with her left hand and held onto the pole with the other as she slid down to a squat. On the beat she pulsed up and down to the next lyrics.

By the way, you've been uninvited

'Cause all you say are all the same things I did

Tim swallowed, eyes having never left her body he watched as the muscles in her legs contract and saw how her amazing ass peeked out slightly more from her bottoms. The routine had certainly taken a turn to a sexual nature and he couldn't help being turned on by the attractive lead singer. Her voice seemed to just purr in his ear. She rose to her feet again as she began the chorus.

Copycat trying to cop my manner

Watch your back when you can't watch mine

Copycat trying to cop my glamour

Why so sad, bunny, you can't have mine?

Did she just make eye contact with him? Holy shit, she definitely did. And was that a smirk? Was he drooling? Tim wiped at his mouth to confirm that he did not embarrass himself. He shook his head a bit to rid himself of the ridiculous idea that she could pick him out in the growing crowd. Many more patrons, especially the male ones, drew in closer and he found that he only had a small space around his table left. No way she looked directly at him. 

Call me calloused, call me cold

You're italic, I'm in bold

She sauntered to the right side of the stage before flipping around and doing a body roll on "italic" followed by a deeper and more exaggerated one on "bold" where she popped her ass out more. There was a cheer from almost all the guys in the building and a flurry of whistles. 

Call me cocky, watch your tone

You better love me, 'cause you're just a clone

Was Time seeing right? He could have sworn she winked at him as she strutted to his side of the stage. He knew he wasn't imagining things when she deliberately pointed at him accusingly while swaying her hips. Damn it was hot in here. He knocked the rest of his drink back hoping to steady his thrumming heart.

The chorus repeated with her returning to center stage and moving the stand off to the side. She dropped to the floor and threw her legs over the side where some of the guys tried to touch her before a bouncer pushed them back. As she finished the chorus she swung her legs back onstage but pivoted so she was parallel to the edge. One leg straightened while the upstage leg was bent.

I would hate to see you go

Hate to be the one that told you so

You just crossed the line

You've run out of time

Raven brought her upper body down flat with such ease and no doubt incredible core control. She gracefully placed an arm above her head as it turned to look out at the audience all keeping in time with the now soft melody of the song.

 so sorry, now you know

Sorry I'm the one that told you so

On the extended note she curled back up and hugged her knees briefly before sitting up and resting her ass on her heels. Tim was not only impressed with her fluidity and the hot choreography, but the range she held in her vocals. He was starting to think this wasn't such a bad idea after all. 

Sorry, sorry, I'm sorry, sorry

Raven bowed her head and sang softly into the mic looking like she was praying for their forgiveness. The music silenced for a beat before she snapped her head up with a devious glint in her eyes, a small curl to the side of her lips, and a quirked brow.

Sike

She got up to her knees and swayed back nearly to the former sitting position before thrusting forward again on each beat.

By the way, you've been uninvited

'Cause all you say are all the same things I did...

...you can't have mine?

She had risen to her feet again through a combination of swaying hips and body rolls. She retrieved the mic stand again and returned the mic to its post before the last lyric and ended the song in the same pose she started with.

At the song's last note the crowd erupted in applause, whistling, and to Tim's displeasure, sexual comments from some of the more rowdy and drunk guys. The band bowed and waved before thanking the owner and the audience and retreated off stage. 

His earlier worry about the band playing songs inappropriate to the occasion was thrown out the window because all parts of him thoroughly enjoyed their last song. He wouldn't dare say that to anyone but damn him if it wasn't true. That lead singer was just so gorgeous and had such a unique and fantastic voice, this must be every guy's fantasy. It was his now but who was he kidding, she must have a boyfriend. Wait...but didn't she wink at him? No, it was all an act. God he needed another drink. 

Tim made his way back to the bar and ordered another bourbon on the rocks. He paid his tab and leaned on the bar, replaying the movements of Raven's body. He felt a little shameful for not watching the other bandmates as the whole song was performed well, but she was too captivating. Probably why she was the lead singer.

 A pat on the shoulder interrupted him from his non-stop overthinking and he turned to see the smiling faces of the friends he came here with. The friends he had completely forgotten about until now. 

"Dude where the hell did you go? We had a great spot just left of center stage! There were a ton of hot girls dancing with us!" Gar waved his arms around almost smacking Garth and Connor. The two just shaking their heads and laughing.

"Not to mention a great view of the performance." Connor nudged Tim and an almost wistful look came across his eyes. Tim swallowed hard again.

"And what a performance that was. Shit that lead singer has a great body." Garth swung his arm around Gar's shoulder.

"And voice." Tim coughed and immediately took another sip of his drink realizing that it didn't help.

Garfield chuckled. "Who was listening to the music when she worked that ass like that. She probably got ninety percent of the guys in here hard by the first chorus."

"And you said she was creepy." Connor poked Gar in his chest. 

He held his hands up defensively. "Hey, that was before I knew she could get down like that! I mean her name is the bird of death, a bad omen. The other girls' names are kinda hot."

"Raven is just her stage name." Tim interjected. He didn't know why he felt like defending her, he quite literally didn't know her at all and this was typical Garfield behavior.

"Woah chill Tim. Got the hots for the lead singer? Wouldn't be the only one. Do you think she's single?" Garth lightly pushed his shoulder and took a seat next to him at the bar, flagging the bartender down. The other two looked at Connor who seemed to have the most information on the girl.

He head flicked back and forth between the two men staring at him before he understood their eager silence. "Look, I don't actually know that much about her. I just know about the fake names and mostly about Jinx. Wally doesn't really talk about the other two and I don't ask." 

Garfield groaned. "Why the hell not? Your friend is the drummer for a hot girl band and you don't ask about their relationship status, or what their real names are?"

"No I don't because that's weird and I'm sure he's told me their names, I just don't remember right now. Not like you'd have a shot with them."  The three men laughed at Garfield's expense and he crossed his arms and pouted.

"I don't see a line of girls wanting to dance with you Kent." 

"It doesn't bother me all that much Logan. Plus, I came here to support my friend not hook up with some random chick."

"Ugh you guys are all lame. I'm heading back out there. This band is playing music more my speed." Gar grounded out and spun on his heel, disappearing into the sea of bodies. 

"Good job Con, you made him all grumpy. Now I gotta calm him down." Garth grabbed his beer and followed his friend.

Tim was now reminded of why he was hesitant to come tonight. He wasn't the best of friends with Garth and Garfield and he came solely because of the desperate plea of Connor. He looked over to the stage and saw the main band playing their hearts out, music blaring over the speakers in an uptempo beat. Although it was more along the lines of typical club music, he found he preferred the darker melodies of Nevermore. 

"Yo buddy! Where'd that big brain of yours disappear to?" Connor waved his hand in front of his face dizzying him for a second. Tim reached and snatched Connor's arm to stop him and dropped it once his motion stilled.

"Sorry, I was just trying to remember something. How are you doing? Enjoying yourself?" 

"Yeah it's great. Awesome way to celebrate getting our degrees. I wish I had someone a little more special with me though, better company than those two numbskulls. How'd they graduate anyhow?" Connor took the seat the Garth vacated and spun facing the bar.

"Well, shockingly, Garth is actually pretty smart and Gar just copies off him when he can. He certainly didn't graduate magna cum laude." The two shared a laugh, lightening the mood once more. "You'll get that someone soon. Why don't you go back out there and see if she's there?"

"I feel like my soulmate isn't dancing in a club right now. I wouldn't be if my good friend wasn't playing for a big audience tonight."

"Fair enough. His band was really good. Do they play often?"

"At smaller venues yeah. I'm sure they'll be playing more here though, if any of the guys have anything to say about it." Connor smiled as if replaying a fond memory. "What do you think about Raven and Argent?"

"They're cool, great voices and Argent is amazing on the keyboard. How she keeps track of all the sounds is beyond me."

Connor let out a lighthearted chuckle. "I meant as attractive women, not their talents. Dork."

"Oh, yeah they're attractive."

"Wow, you're just not into this dude talk are you?" Connor swiveled to face him.

"I'm sorry, what am I supposed to say? I'm not going to sit here and objectify them." Tim looked seriously into his glass. It wasn't his intention to ruin the fun but he wasn't a fan of talking about his romantic interests, it felt too personal even though Connor was his best friend. 

"Sorry Tim. I didn't mean to offend you, just dumb guy stuff. I guess I've been hanging out with Gar squared too much." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. Damn Tim really had a way with being a downer.

"Nah, it's all good. I think I'm just constantly in my head too much. Gotta be professional all the time and all that jazz." 

"Yeah man, well I'm gonna check on those idiots. Try to relax and have fun." Connor stood up and began to move before Tim stopped him.

"For what it's worth, I think Raven is the hottest. Her voice is positively sinful." Tim smirked at him and Connor's eyes widened as if Tim had spilt some highly classified secret. 

"There you go man! Hey maybe I can see if Wally can hook us up with a meet and greet." He winked and came back toward Tim to clap him on the shoulder. He started walking backwards toward the mass of people dancing to the music while pointing at Tim and sending him a knowing wink again. Tim just shook his head and laughed. 

#tim drake #Raven #timrae #band au #robrae #bad idea good intention #first post #hopefully this isn't awful #thanks #teen titans

[thetrishtalgem]

Whumptober Day 1: Let’s Hang Out

Well here’s my contribution to @whumptober2020 for Day 1! I tried this challenge out last year but never actually posted anything, so I figured it’s time to give it a shot.

Sylvain couldn’t help but wonder if there was any truth to the statement, “Distance makes the heart grow fonder.” It had to have some merit. Why else would his heart begin to race every time he had the chance to see Laila again? He knew were he to ask his party that question, they would simply snicker and make lewd gestures while his back was turned. 

But Laila was so much more than simply just that. It was the very thought of spending time with her. He hung onto every word she said as if it were a matter of life and death. Her eyes would light up and shine like emeralds when she spoke of her ventures in Rython. Sylvain wanted nothing more than to take her to all those places and beyond. That way, he could see her in the moment - be with her in the moment.

Whenever he was by her side, everything felt like it was right. Right where it was meant to be. Right within the universe. He could conquer anything thrown his way with her there by his side.

As he began to stir, his whole body felt light, and tingly from the night before. He couldn’t help but smile at even the thought of getting to watch Laila sleep for just a little bit. He went to turn and wrap his arms around her when he felt a tug at his wrists. His brow furrowed as he tugged again, yet felt no give on his arms. It was then that he finally opened his eyes.

He first looked to the empty side of the bed, where the sheets and blanket had been carelessly tossed aside. The clothes that had been carelessly discarded to the floor the night before were nowhere to be found, nor was any of Sylvain’s equipment. His head whipped up to see his hands bound to the headboard of the bed with rope. A pang of fear shot through Sylvain’s body, jolting him awake. He tried in vain to pull at the ropes binding his hands when he felt the same taut pull at his ankles. He was completely bound.

“I see you’re finally awake.”

Sylvain felt his whole body run cold as he looked to the foot of the bed. There stood Laila, dressed fully in her armor. Her shining silver hair was neatly braided and off to the side, as was usual for her. Dark circles rimmed the bottom of her eyes.

“L-Laila,” Sylvain laughed nervously. “This is a hell of a wake-up, don’t you think?”

Laila stood up from the foot of the bed and walked over to the windowsill. “Shut up.”

“Okay, now I’m worried. What exactly is-”

“I told you. Shut. Up.”

She withdrew a dagger from a sheath on her hip, holding the blade up dangerously close to Sylvain’s neck. His eyes went wide as he felt the cool metal press against his skin. He looked to Laila, searching her face for any sign that she was joking. But her expression was stone cold. Unreadable, even. Sylvain simply closed his mouth and swallowed. Hard.

“There. Is that so difficult?” Laila asked, a wry smile pulling at the corners of her lips. She pressed the blade of the knife against Sylvain, using her finger to keep it steady.

Sylvain shook his head furiously and pressed his lips together. Yet still, he couldn’t help but blurt out the question, “Why?”

“Why? Why?” Laila laughed mockingly at him. “You’re a wanted criminal, Sylvain. You and your party were the ones who killed General Drakken.”

“Laila, you-,”

“Believe me. I have no love for the Empire, whatsoever. But they’ve put a bounty on your head. A fairly sizable one,” Laila replied. “And as you know, I’m a bounty hunter.”

Sylvain’s eyes went wide. “You’re...selling me out?”

“You’ve only got yourself to blame,” Laila replied, her tone calm and cool still. “You should have never told me all those things you did. Back in Thoron’s Flame, about how you were working with the rebellion now.”

“I did that because I trusted you,” Sylvain pleaded. “We had met up and then I was just...gone. It wasn’t fair to you.”

Laila’s face fell for a moment, and Sylvain felt her grip on the blade falter. But just as quickly as it came, it passed as she regained her composure. “Did you not even consider that this could happen?”

“No,” Sylvain answered quickly. “I hadn’t. Laila, this isn’t who you are.”

“You don’t know me,” she muttered, pulling the dagger back. “You don’t know me at all.”

Her arm drew back, ready to strike. Sylvain couldn’t bring himself to watch. He closed his eyes and braced himself for impact. He held his body completely still and said a silent prayer to Helm to see him through. But Sylvain never felt the knife pierce his skin. He remained still for a moment. No sound seemed to cut through the ringing in his ears. Instead, he felt the tension release on his wrists and his arms fell gently onto the bed.

Cautiously, Sylvain opened his eyes. He lowered his arms to see there were no scratch marks on them. He could hardly even tell where the ropes had been tied that bound him moments before. His fingers curled around his wrist in a feeble attempt to keep from shaking. It felt as though his heart may come bursting out of his chest at any moment. His mind raced to try and make sense out of what happened.

“You should go.”

Sylvain whipped his head up to look at Laila. She had turned her back to him, instead choosing to face the window. He looked to see she still had the dagger clutched tightly in her hand. Sylvain sat up in the bed.

“Laila,” he called to her, his voice soft and gentle, “what-,”

“Don’t. Please,” Laila’s voice cracked.

Sylvain opened his mouth as if to say something, but decided against it. Instead, he leaned over and began to undo the ropes binding his ankles. Each pull of the rope seemed to shoot a pang of some sort into his chest. He was unsure if it was of regret, sorrow, or anger. Even as Sylvain heard Laila move, he found it impossible to look at her. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to offer her a comforting hand, or to strangle her. Maybe both.

“Here,” Laila said, dropping a bag on the ground with a metallic clatter. 

Sylvain looked down to see it filled with his armor and weapons. As he looked back up, he found himself eye to eye with Laila. Her eyes were bloodshot. For a moment, Sylvain thought she might begin to cry. But just as quickly as it had happened, Laila turned on her heel and began walking towards the door.

“I think it would be best for you to go,” Laila muttered.

Sylvain looked at her in disbelief. When he realized she wasn’t going to turn around and face him, he answered, “Yeah. Probably.”

She left the room without another word. Sylvain sat still on the bed for a moment. His thoughts all felt as though they were all tangled together, as if they were made of string. And no matter how much he tried to unravel them, it just seemed to make it worse. He tossed the blanket aside and began to dress himself silently. His armor felt heavier than he remembered it being the night before. Perhaps it was his heart as well. He quickly brushed his fingers through his hair in an attempt to straighten it out. It would be good enough. His party knew he was with Laila, after all. They just didn’t need to be privy to the details.

Sylvain left the room and walked down the creaking staircase of the inn. He couldn’t help but take a moment to look at the bar’s patrons, hoping that one of them would be familiar. Yet he saw no sign of Laila, nor her own travelling companions. Any traces of them were gone. Sylvain knew it was for the best, yet he still felt his heart sink as he made his way across the room and to the door.

As he exited the building, he noticed a girl leaning up against a building pillar on the other side of the street. She was small, with brilliant white hair that faded to pink at the bottom. He stepped out and let the door swing shut behind him, catching her attention.

“Soooo…” she began, a mocking tone in her voice, “how was last night?”

“It was fine, Lys,” Sylvain responded flatly. He continued up the road, not bothering to look and see if she was following after him.

“Just good? Or was it something more, to have her in your embrace again?” Lys mimicked Sylvain’s voice as she spoke.

“Try as you might, I’m not telling you anything more than you’ve already surmised,” Sylvain huffed.

“You want to leave me to assume? That didn’t work out well for you last time, Syl.”

“Do whatever you want.”

“I’ll call it out to the whole town, then. That you and Laila were having sex, all night long.”

“And draw attention to the fact that we, two wanted criminals of the Empire, are here? Walking around in broad daylight?”

“Your bright blue, zappy armor does a good job of that in and of itself, dude.”

“Shut up.”

Despite his snap, Sylvain couldn’t help but smile. At least he could count on Lys to keep things as normal as possible. As he turned to look and see the smug grin on Lys’s face, he thought he caught sight of a flash of silver hair. His fingers immediately wrapped around his wrists again. Upon closer inspection, however, he noticed it was just an elderly woman at the market. Sylvain sighed quietly, lowering his hands to his side.

Perhaps distance really was what he and Laila needed.

#whumptober2020 #no.1 #let's hang out #waking up restrained #oc #fic #dungeons and dragons #dnd #dnd oc

[justsomebucky]

Thankful

Summary: AU. Reader is used to living on her own terms, so when she’s suddenly jammed back in with her family for Thanksgiving, things get a little crazy. Will a stranger she met at the bar be the perfect one to help her through the holiday?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader

Word Count: 4,931

Warnings: language, drinking, creeper at a bar being a creeper, the creeper hits on reader so if that makes you uncomfortable avoid, fighting, fake dating, fluff, awkwardness, family arguments, things get steamy, no smut

A/N: This is a re-post of a fic I attempted for a holiday challenge back in 2016. It was posted in three parts on a different blog, but I smushed them together here. Sorry for the bad writing lol.

Thanksgiving Day was a mess.

It was just like last year, and the year before, and the year before…

Every year your parents asked you to come home, and every year you tried to say no (and ended up giving in). That’s why this year you were back in your hometown once again.

Nothing was out of the ordinary so far, but you were tense and waiting for something to go wrong. Your little sister was nagging you about anything and everything she could. Your mother was asking about your work, while your father wanted to know if you were seeing anyone, and if you were, why weren’t they willing to come home and have a nice chat with him?

So, yeah…Thanksgiving Day was a mess.

It’s not that you didn’t love your family. You loved them a lot, but you were so used to doing your own thing, that life in the same house felt too cramped now.

“Mom, Y/N isn’t listening to me!”

“Listen to your sister, dear,” your mom called from the kitchen, where her and your father were cooking. You were in the living room playing cards with your sister and trying your hardest to not punch her.

Your eyes flitted up to hers over your hand of cards. “What?”

“What?” she parroted back gleefully.

“I asked you first.” You could feel the beginning of a headache starting.

“I asked you first.”

Instead of raising your voice to tell your little sister to shut her face like you really wanted to do, you merely smiled at her. “Go fish.”

”You’re a fish!”

“Sweetie, be nice!”

“But she’s stupid!”

“All right.” You put your cards back into the center pile and stood up. “I’m sorry, guys, I tried. I need to get out of here.”

Your sister gasped like you’d just told her the world was ending. “But we weren’t finished with the game!”

“I’m finished. I will be home in a bit.” You threw on a hoodie and grabbed your purse and keys.

“It’ll only be about another hour, sweetie,” your mom told you as you walked through the room.

“You could at least stay and help your mother and me,” your father chided.

That was the last thing you heard before you shut the door behind you.

You knew it was rude and that you should be contributing, but if you didn’t get out of there soon you were gonna lose it, and you really didn’t want to end up in jail on a holiday.

It was the only bar open in at least ten miles, and it was shady as hell.

There was thick cigar smoke billowing through the air. A pool table sat in the corner, where two leather-clad muscle bros were pushing each other back and forth, arguing over who would buy the next round of beer.

The good news? You weren’t the only woman.

The bad news? You might as well have been, the way everyone turned to leer at you when you walked in. You were wearing jeans and a Yankees t-shirt under the zipped hoodie you had on, so it’s not like you were enticing them outright.

You took a deep breath and made your way over to a barstool away from other people.

“What’re you havin’?” A pretty young girl came over to you with a smile, her hands on her hips expectantly.

“Hey Wanda, I was here first!” You couldn’t see who had said it, but he didn’t sound happy.

She whirled around. “Give me a minute, asshole! Fresh blood here!” Wanda turned back to you, her sweet smile back on her face. “Decide yet?”

“I’ll have a Jack and Coke,” you said boldly. That wasn’t your normal drink of choice, but it seemed fitting for the dive bar atmosphere.

“Comin’ right up,” she said, winking at you. “Don’t worry, these boys don’t bite.”

“Yeah,” you muttered, glancing around you. “Hopefully not.”

The other patrons of the bar didn’t really surprise you. There was a middle-aged woman with a low-cut top sitting next to a heavy-set bearded man who was definitely enjoying the view. To their right, two frat boys who probably didn’t go home for break were doing shots.

In the corner opposite of you, there was a man with long brown hair tucked under a baseball cap, which was pulled low over his eyes. He was leaning against the bar top and staring down at the whiskey in front of him.

As if he heard your thoughts, he looked up at you, and you glanced away quickly. His eyes were bright blue with a hint of grey, like a storm approaching the ocean. They were beautiful even in the dim light.

Wanda came back with your drink, and you thanked her with a smile. You took a generous sip, knowing that it couldn’t fix your issues but it might calm you down.

Your family was making you pretty damn anxious, after all.

A hand on your shoulder made your back stiffen. You could smell him before you saw him, a combination of cigar and body odor. When you turned your head to look, you cringed.  

“Hey, darlin’.” One of the big biker dudes from the pool table fight had meandered over to you and was now trying to hit on you. Why, oh why had you come here alone? What were you thinking?

“Not interested,” you replied automatically. Maybe you should invest in a fake engagement ring to make sure people knew you were taken. You weren’t, but they didn’t need to know that.

“You don’t even know me,” he drawled in your ear. “Come on, give me a chance.”

A wave of fear went through you. He was bigger than you, and the exit was behind him. “Please leave me alone, I didn’t come here to hook up.”

“No, but you might come here anyways, catch my drift?” His hand moved down your shoulder and you felt him try to tug on the zipper of your hoodie. “What’s underneath here?”

Now you were really freaked out. You jerked away from him. “Listen-“

“She said she wasn’t interested!” One good punch sent the man flying into the dart board on the wall. It came crashing down right on the guy’s face.

You turned to see the man with the baseball cap as he glared at the fallen creeper. He looked over at Wanda apologetically. “Sorry for the disruption.”

“No worries, Bucky. That guy’s a jackass anyhow.” Wanda frowned. “Better get her out of here before he comes to, though.”

Your eyes volleyed between the two in confusion. “Why?”

“Because he’s gonna try harder next time,” Bucky replied, motioning for you to get up. “I can make sure you get home okay.”

“I have my car here,” you told him. “I can’t leave it.”

He ran a hand down his face. “All right. But I’m following you home.”

Your mouth opened and closed a few times to try to find the right words to protest. This guy? Coming home with you?

“Stranger danger,” was all you could manage to say.

To your surprise, Bucky started chuckling. He had perfect white teeth, and these little crinkles around his eyes that made him even more handsome when he smiled.  

“My name’s Bucky Barnes.”

“I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Nice to meet you, Y/N. See? Now we’re not strangers, and I promise I’ll lose your address,” he said. “So come on, before idiot here decides that he’s going to wake up and knock the both of us out.”

The thought of that guy even looking at you again was enough motivation to trust Bucky.

“Fine.” You stood up, tossing some bills down on the bar for Wanda. “Let’s go.”

When you pulled your car back into the driveway and cut the engine, you saw Bucky park his motorcycle along the curb. You got out and shut the car door quietly, then walked down to where he sat waiting.

“Thank you for punching that creeper,” you told him. “And thank you for making sure I made it home okay.”

“It’s not a problem,” Bucky replied. “My mom taught me to be a gentleman, and that guy was definitely crossing all sorts of lines.” He looked thoughtful for a moment. “Why, if you live here, were you all the way out there in a dive bar…by yourself…on Thanksgiving?”

You bit your lip. “My family drives me crazy. I normally live in the city by myself, and it’s just hard being back here, all smushed together in one house again.”

His eyes narrow a little. “So you put yourself in danger because you’re sick of spending quality time with your family?”

Now that he said it like that, you felt like an asshole. “Look, I know it must sound stupid to you, but they are always asking about my life and-”

Your voice trailed off when a brilliant idea struck. There was one surefire way to get your parents off your back.

“And?” Bucky stared at you in confusion. “You were saying?”

“How old are you?”

“Why?”

“Just curious.”

When he told you his age, you could hardly believe your luck. “And you’re single?”

“Yup. Why?”

“Why were you alone in a bar like that on Thanksgiving?”

He shrugged, looking down the road then back to you. His gaze wandered over your features for a moment before meeting your eyes again. “No family. I don’t usually go to seedy bars, but it was the only one open.”

You could understand that. It’s basically why you ended up there.

“No friends?”

Bucky smiled ruefully. “My best friend, Steve, invited me over, but…he’s got a wife, a couple kids, and some in-laws to worry about. I didn’t want to add to the list.”

Alone, single, considerate…this could work.

“Want to come in and give my family a little shock?”

“Uh…” He paused, scratching his head under the ball cap. “What?”

Your mouth quirked up. “You’ll get free food if you come in here and pretend to be my boyfriend for one night. What do you say?”

“You want to use me to make your family crazy? Didn’t you say they were already crazy?” Bucky eyed you incredulously. “They won’t have me arrested, right? Your dad isn’t gonna punch me?”

You burst out laughing. “Bucky, you knocked out a guy who was at least 250 pounds. I think you’ll be fine.”

His eyes looked past you to the door. “Looks like we’re busted anyways.”

“Y/N? What’s going on?” your mother’s worried voice carried over the yard to your ears.

“Nothing, Mom,” you replied quickly. “It’s just-“

Time to go for it. You motioned for Bucky to get off the motorcycle and he did, moving to stand beside you. He gave a little grunt when your fingers laced with his.

“My boyfriend’s finally here!”

If you could have captured your mother’s expression in a photo when you introduced Bucky as your boyfriend, you’d have sent it as your Christmas card.

Her shock and your father’s reaction were going to get you through this Thanksgiving.

You led Bucky by the hand straight up the front walk to where your mother stood. Your little sister was peeking around her, trying to get a good look at this stranger you’d just brought home.

“Mom, this is-”

“James Barnes, ma’am, but everyone calls me Bucky,” he interrupted. Suddenly your fake boyfriend was a smooth gentleman, taking your mother’s hand in his and giving it a peck. “And who is that princess behind you?”

Your sister giggled, hiding her face. “I’m not a princess!”

“You are to me,” he said with a smile. “Ma’am, if it’s all right with you, Y/N here has invited me to dinner because I had no plans of my own. I don’t mean to intrude.”

“No, please come in,” your mother said, forcing a smile. “You’re welcome to join us, it’s just that Y/N never told us about you.”

“Well I hope I can rectify that.” Bucky looked at you and you shrugged. You had no idea how far this was going to go, you just wanted someone to save you from your family.

“Who is that, dear?” your father’s voice boomed from the dining room.

“It’s Y/N, and she’s brought her boyfriend this time!”

“Boyfriend?”

This time Bucky turned to you with what could only be considered true fear in his eyes. You gave him a wink to let him know it was okay.

The two of you followed your mom and sister into the dining room, where a Thanksgiving feast was now laid out for the taking.

“Here, Bucky dear, sit here, and I’ll set another place.”

His face was calm, you had to give him credit for that. Your mom had put him right beside your father, who was sitting at the head of the table with a large carving knife as he prepared to slice the turkey. You took your place next to Bucky and sat down.

“So, son, tell me about yourself and why you’re putting your hands all over my daughter,” your dad said, tapping the knife against the turkey.

Bucky’s mouth opened and closed twice before you decided to step in.  

You were sure that was a scare tactic, which was interesting because he’d never done that to guys you brought home before.

“Dad! Can we please not embarrass him on his first time here?”

Bucky finally reacted, offering you a small smile. “It’s fine, Doll.” He turned back to your father. “Well, sir, I can honestly say that Y/N is one of the most…intriguing people I’ve ever met. She’s pretty no-nonsense about life, which is refreshing.”

“And what about you?” he asked Bucky, scrutinizing him.

“Bucky is smart and capable,” you blurted out. You weren’t even sure where that came from, but all the sudden you really wanted your dad to like him.

Both men turned their eyes to you.

You took that as a sign to continue. “He’s strong, and he’s got a great sense of right and wrong. He’d stand up for me and protect me if it came down to it.” You weren’t lying, since that had actually already happened back at the bar.

Your father studied your face for a second before a big grin broke out. “Well, then, Borky, I guess you’re all right for my little girl.”

“It’s, uh, Bucky, sir.”

“That’s what I said!”

Dinner was a crazy success. It was crazy because you and Bucky had actually pulled off this ruse fairly easily. You found him to be utterly charming. About halfway through the dinner, he started smiling at you for no reason, and each time he did, your heart would flutter a little.

It’s all pretend, you had to remind yourself, as you helped your mom with the dishes. Bucky had wandered into the family room to watch some football game on TV with your father. Your little sister was sitting next to him, giggling at him and grinning a lot.

It seemed your whole family was already smitten with Bucky Barnes.

It’s too bad that come tomorrow, he’ll be gone, you thought mournfully.

“Something got you down, Y/N?”

You looked up at your mom with a sad smile. “No, just tired.”

“Ah, well, why don’t you go up and get ready for bed. We’re almost done here anyways.”

“Thank you.” You gave her a grateful look, turning to go up the stairs.

“Oh and Y/N, since you and Bucky aren’t engaged, he has to sleep on the couch!”

You stopped halfway up the stairs. “Uh, we didn’t talk about him staying here tonight, Mom.”

“Nonsense,” she said, waving her hands in the air. “Bucky, come here a moment!”

“Yes, Mrs. Y/L/N?” Bucky appeared at the bottom of the stairs, glancing up at you in question before turning back to your mother.

“Y/N is going to go to bed, and she seems to be under the impression that you aren’t staying tonight. It’s so late, I can’t imagine you heading out on your own now, especially on a motorcycle. I’ll make the couch up for you.”

“Oh no, ma’am, that really won’t be necessary, I-“

“Good then, that’s settled.” She ended the conversation with a sharp clap.

Bucky looked back at you helplessly, and you mouthed I’m sorry.

It was well after one in the morning and your whole family was asleep by now, so you tiptoed downstairs to tell Bucky he didn’t really have to stay if he didn’t want to.

After your shower earlier, you had changed into comfy pajamas (ones that had tiny cats all over them) and wandered back downstairs to find Bucky playing cards with the rest of your family. They were teaching your little sister how to play Texas Hold ‘Em, and she had apparently done really well.

You had sat beside Bucky with a smirk, watching as he and your father faced off for the final hand. His cards were decent; he had three of a kind. But like the gentleman he is, when your father laid down his hand with two pairs, Bucky folded, and your father gleefully took the pot.

He told you after that he didn’t want your father to dislike him, which struck you as kind of strange since he barely knew you, but you’d been too tired to question it.

Just when you really wanted to get some rest, your brain decided to work overtime, throwing ideas at you that you’d never considered before. Maybe he liked you and that’s why he wanted to stick around. Maybe he wanted to impress your father so he can come back. Maybe…

So there you were, treading as lightly as possible downstairs to the couch, where Bucky was laying under a quilt with his arm thrown over his eyes.

“Bucky,” you called out. “Are you sleeping?”

You saw his mouth curl into a grin. “If I was, your loud mouth would surely have woken me up anyways.”

“Ha-ha.”

He brought his arm down and opened his eyes to look at you. “What’s wrong? Can’t sleep?”

“Not really,” you admitted. “I’m a little anxious, so I came to check on you. You don’t really have to stay if you don’t want to.”

“Won’t that look a little weird come morning?” The corner of his mouth quirked up again. “I’m fine here. I appreciate the company, to be honest. I’d have just been home by myself tonight.”

“Okay.”

After a few beats of comfortable silence, he sat up and lifted his blanket, silently inviting you to sit beside him.

Your stomach did the fluttery thing this time instead of your heart. Nerves around a stranger, you decided, as you moved to sit beside him, tucking the blanket over your legs.

“Thanks for inviting me, even if it was all to trick your family,” Bucky murmured, his eyes roaming your face.

“You’re welcome,” you replied quietly. “It’s been…interesting.”

“Yes, it has,” he agreed. He ran a hand through his long hair, smoothing it back from his face, and you couldn’t help but stare at his strong jawline.

There was that damn flutter again.

Bucky’s brow lifted a little. “What’s on your mind, Doll?”

Now, this could go one of two ways.

You could lie and say stress from work or whatever. Or, you could let him know the truth.

“You,” you whispered, choosing the latter.

His eyes widened in surprise. “Me?”

You nodded, your gaze dropping to his lips for a moment. You wondered if they’d be soft, and you needed to find out.

This was crazy, but you were always game for a little unconventionality.

You leaned over and pressed your lips to his gently.

Bucky didn’t react at first. In fact, it took so long you’d almost pulled away out of sheer mortification, before you felt his gentle touch on your neck as he began to kiss you back.

Yes, his lips were definitely soft.

You shifted closer until you were straddling his lap, never letting the kiss break. His hands moved down to your hips to hold you steady.  

The kisses between you became needier, more desperate, and your hands touched his hair, his neck, his chest, anything you could grab a hold of. His hands slipped down to your backside and gave a gentle squeeze, causing you to whimper into his mouth.

“Ah,” he panted, pulling back to rest his forehead against yours. “We can’t- what if someone catches us, your parents-“

You sat there on his lap for a moment, trying to catch your breath and come up with a plan. You were good at plans, right? Surely you could handle this.

When you moved off his lap, he protested with a groan. “Y/N, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to ruin the mood.”

“Don’t just sit there,” you said over your shoulder as you made your way back up the stairs. “Come on, already!”

Bucky’s eyes widened as he got your meaning. He moved fast and suddenly he was behind you, urging you to go faster while you tried not to giggle too loud.

The second your bedroom door closed, Bucky pinned you against it and placed searing open-mouthed kisses along your neck.

“I don’t usually do this,” he murmured against your skin.

“Could have fooled me,” you replied, arching your body against his to feel more – more him, more friction, anything. He nipped at your skin in response. “You seem to have all the right moves down.”

“We don’t even know each other.” This time he pulled back to look at you, his blue-grey eyes stormy with hesitation. “I don’t think I can do this with your parents down the hall.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “What are you, an inexperienced teenager?”

He ran a hand down his face. “No, I just…”

“Is it me?” you asked softly, looking away. “I know I’m probably not as hot as you’re used to-“

“Stop,” he said sharply, his hand lifting your chin gently so you’d look at him. “You’re beautiful. You’re sexy and gorgeous, and god, I want you, I just-“

“Just what?” you whispered, afraid of the answer.

This was the part where the men realized you had feelings and bailed on you. It had happened time and time again; that’s why your family had been so surprised to see you with a boyfriend. You’d sworn them off over the summer after you discovered your last boyfriend, Drew, had not one, but two side chicks.

Yeah, you were used to this rejection.

Bucky’s eyes softened. The way he was looking at you…it kind of gave you some hope.

“I don’t want to ruin this,” he said finally. “It’s been so long since I felt anything for a woman, and I know we just met…but I just…” He paused, then shook his head. “This is fast. I don’t want to rush things and ruin it.”

Your eyes searched his for any hint of lie. “Bucky, if you need an out, you can just tell me, you know that right? I don’t want you to think I brought you here for this.”

He shook his head. “It’s not an out. For fuck’s sake, why can’t I just…” He moved away from you, running a frustrated hand through his long hair. “It’s been so long, I don’t even know how to talk to a woman anymore.”

You reached up and placed a hand on his shoulder, frowning when he flinched. “It’s okay, Bucky, I promise.”

“No,” he disagreed, looking up at you then, eyes intense. “It isn’t. I’m so out of touch that I made a beautiful woman think herself undesirable. God, Y/N, if you could feel what you do to me, how you made me feel after one evening, you’d never question yourself again.”

“We don’t even know each other,” you echoed his words from earlier.

“I want to change that.” He grabbed your hand from his shoulder and grasped tightly. “I’m not a one night stand kind of guy. I want you – want this – but I need to do it the right way. Is that okay?”

You nearly laughed out loud, but didn’t want to make him think you were laughing at him. “You certainly have a way with words, Bucky Barnes.”

His mouth quirked up a little, his eyes showing a new tiredness. “So, does that mean you are willing to give us a real shot? Let me take you on a date, maybe woo you a little?”

You reached out a hand and gently caressed his cheekbone before brushing the hair back from his face. “I think I’d like that, actually. I’d like that a lot.”

Bucky breathed a sigh of relief. “I should go back down to the couch before anyone gets suspicious.”

The parting kiss he gave you was one for the record books, in your opinion. Your toes literally curled against the carpeted floor as he pressed his mouth to yours tenderly. He held you as if you were something precious.

For a man you’d just met, he was already treating you like you were something worth holding on to.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he breathed against your lips. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, Bucky. See you tomorrow.”

The next morning, you made sure that you were showered and dressed early, with your hair and makeup done. You felt a little silly since Bucky had seen you without all of it already (hell, he’d seen you in your cat pajamas), but you didn’t want to risk him changing his mind in the morning light.

You practically ran down the stairs, only to find the quilt neatly folded, not a trace of Bucky to be found. A quick peek out the window told you his motorcycle was gone, too.

Your heart sank. Had he really gone, even after all his sweet words last night?

None of this made any sense. This wasn’t normal…who gets this attached to someone overnight? It was just meant to be a one-time thing. He was just a means to survive Thanksgiving with your family.

You were naïve if you thought that somehow this man would turn into anything more than that. You didn’t even know him. He had no reason to stick around, and you had no right to expect anything from him…

Why were you always such a goddamn romantic?

You wiped furiously at the traitorous tears that stung your eyes. If he could see you now, he’d probably laugh. Your ex-boyfriend Drew would probably have given him a high-five for this.

That’s it, you were swearing off rom-coms for good. No more romantic movies, no more unobtainable goals, no more longing for love. You were done.

Screw it.

With a deep breath, you turned and marched into the hallway, grabbing your jacket, bag and keys. It was time to go back home; you couldn’t stand another second around this house.

“Mom, Dad, I’m going back to the city now,” you yelled, hoping that they would hear you and just yell back so you wouldn’t have to say goodbye again.

You hated goodbyes.

Then again, no one responded to you. There wasn’t a sound in the house.

You frowned, turning to glance around. “Mom? Dad?”

“You were going to leave without saying goodbye? I thought we had something going here.”

You whirled around and came face-to-face with Bucky. “I- I thought you left already? Your motorcycle…?”

The corner of his mouth lifted in amusement. “Your dad made me park it in the garage. He said the neighbors were eyeing it. Frankly, I think he just wanted to have a look at it himself.” Bucky took a few steps closer to you. “You really thought that I would ever leave without telling you?”

“I’m used to being left,” you admitted softly, glancing away. You didn’t want him to see any trace of how upset you’d gotten.

“Doll, I know we don’t know each other very well, but I’m a man of my word.”

When you met his gaze again, he took a few steps closer until he was standing right in front of you.

He shook his head once. “I’m not running…are you?”

“No,” you whispered, completely captivated by the tender look in his eyes.

“Good.”

His smile was so bright, so genuine, that you grabbed him into a tight hug, burying your face in his neck.

“I’m sorry,” you said in a muffled voice. “I’m not usually like this.”

Bucky laughed, his arms encircling you. “That makes two of us, Doll.”

You lifted your face up to look at him, and were rewarded with a chaste kiss.

“There you two are, we’ve been waiting out front for you! Let’s go, before your father eats his steering wheel! Never get between him and his breakfast.” Your mom stood in the doorway, her hands on her hips expectantly.

Almost sheepishly, you unwound yourself from his arms. “What are you talking about?”

Bucky kissed your temple. “Your mom invited me to come to breakfast with your family. Apparently there’s a diner they want to show me in town.”

“Best breakfast in the area,” your mom declared, clapping her hands. “Now let’s move. I don’t want to explain to the Honda repair shop why there are chunks missing from the car.”

You smiled warmly at Bucky. “Having breakfast with my family now, eh?”

He grinned back at you. “Gotta make a good impression somehow, Doll.” He reached for your hand and intertwined your fingers, then pulled you along to follow your mom to the car.

“I don’t wanna seem anything less than thankful for you, after all.”

Happy Thanksgiving to all my American readers! May you survive the holidays with your sanity in tact and your bellies full.

#bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #jsb thankful #bucky barnes drabble

[kashmiresims]

Baking Bad

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“Home baked cookies! We also have brownies, scones, and muffins too!” Alanna called down the main street of midtown Isla Del Kashmire. She was trying to drum up interest to any passersby on the street. They’d made a few sales since they first set up the bake sale that morning. Saturday mornings were a bit slow in the sleepy island town but now that it was nearing afternoon, more people were up an and about. Franz left the sales to Alanna. She had the natural enthusiasm, charm, and plus she didn’t scare customers away. Unlike Franz, who seemed to whenever he stood up to try and help her sell. He didn’t smile or say anything so all anyone judged him by was his intimidating height. So after a few failed attempts, he ended up sitting off to the side behind the farthest table and continued to read a book. He’d help if Alanna if she really needed it but his contribution to this project was mainly the baking. And since it was her idea, it was her turn to take the lead. Two little girls heard Alanna’s call and approached the table and looked over the sweets with hungry eyes. “Can I have all these chocolate chip cookies?” the little blonde girl asked and gestured to the cookies set out at the end of the table. There were more in the canisters but those had the pecans in them. “Uh…” Alanna seemed to be thrown off at the large request, “They are 3 simoleons a piece, do you have enough for all of them?” “Of course I do,” she seemed offended, “I’m not poor.” Franz glanced up from his book briefly with a frown. The way the girl had said it was in such a way It reminded him of when he was a boy and children had taunted him for not having a lot of money. What they didn’t realize was that even though his mother had owned the bakery, all their revenue would go back into it, leaving very little for personal luxury. Alanna held up her hands in apology for any miscommunicated inference, “It’s 30 simoleons total,” she placed the baked goods for the girl into a plastic bag. The little girl held out her hand and dropped the exact amount into Alanna’s palm and smiled. She put it in the money box behind her next to her bicycle.

“Make sure to tell your friends; we’re here until 4:00!” Alanna said as the girls walked away with their cookies. Alanna turned to Franz with a slightly disheartened look, “Franz, they took all the plain chocolate chip cookies!” Franz shrugged, “Maybe you should have bought them earlier if you wanted some.” When she didn’t respond, he ripped his concentration from reading and saw she was slightly pouting. He let out a sigh and a half smile, “Maybe I can make you some later tonight, if I have any ingredients left.” His answer made her grin again and his half smile spread into a full one at seeing it. He went back to reading. “What business do kids have wandering around with all that money though?” He wondered aloud. His eyes scanned the page but he wasn't taking in the words anymore, reminded of the insults kids taunted him with. “It’s the weekend. Parents probably give their kids spending money and let them loose on the neighborhood. Isla Del Kashmire is a safe enough place. I bet most kids spend more than half the cost of all those cookies at the arcade,” Alanna explained, “didn’t you ever do that?” “No,” he answered. He didn’t really discuss his past to anyone, not even Alanna. She had gone to school with him, though was not in his classes and she knew he wasn’t wealthy but didn’t know the extent of how dirt poor he was as a child—his entertainment options were very limited. He instead, went to the public library because it was free. He could spend all weekend holed up in a quiet corner in that old building where no one could bother him and read to his heart’s content. Speaking of such an activity, Franz continued to read his current book and didn’t discuss the subject further. It was a book that was listed as a ‘classic’ but one he had never yet gotten around to read—but he knew why, because it was an old book–set in history not the imaginative futurescapes he was accustomed to with science fiction. “I loved ’War and 'Peace’,” Alanna mentioned, referring to his book as she leaned against the small planter underneath the coffee shop window.

Franz took a moment to finish reading the paragraph he was on and then retorted as he turned the page, “You love every book; just like you love every person you meet.” She seemed to think about it and then shrugged, “I don’t think that’s true so much on the people part but so what if I love every book I read?” “Customer,” Franz nodded as he saw movement above the book spine without focusing on it. Alanna straightened up and started to greet them. Apparently, they weren’t actually interested in buying, but only had paused at the bake sale table before going on their way into the coffee shop. “You sure you want to miss out?” Alanna asked, trying to make them reconsider. “Why should I buy overpriced brownies here when there’s a bakery a few blocks down the street?” they asked and made a nod in the direction of the old building. “All proceeds go toward helping a woman afford medical treatment, every bit helps! Plus, you get something delicious out of it,” She replied. The way she explained it–on the right note between sad and yet optimistic–was enough for the stranger to hand over the amount they had considered to be too much a few seconds ago in exchange for a brownie. Franz was sometimes in awe of how Alanna could handle people she had never met before. She treated them as if they were old friends that she just hadn’t seen in a long time, which blew his mind since they hadn’t existed in her life until that moment. It was her superpower. “Tell your friends! We’re here till’ 4:00!” Alanna waved goodbye as they entered the coffee shop; their intended destination. “If you love all books, then there’s no room to compare good from bad,” Franz continued to converse on the topic they had started before the last customer. “They all have their merits,” she continued on with him, “Maybe I’m just not picky?” “You don’t like raisins,” he reminded her. Though he knew comparing her pickiness for food to books was like apples to oranges. She gave a playful scoff and slid her index finger into the valley between the pages of his book and pulled it downward to cause him to make eye contact as he had only continued to read the entire time during their conversation. He met her gaze and she had one brow arched indignantly. “Raisins are the mummified corpses of grapes and taste like the inevitable fruit-death that they are. They have no business being in anyone’s food, least of all something as delicious as a cookie.” He had to crack a smile at her annoyance because it was so rare and it was terrible of him but he had intentionally encouraged it by bringing it up. It was all in harmless fun, though. Raisins were the only thing he’d ever see her get somewhat judgmental about in the times since they had become friends. Even when he’d snack on them she always had to make a disgusted face or comment on how unappetizing they were. He’d been unfortunate enough to share a bag of trail mix with her that contained the little pieces of dried fruit and that was the day he discovered her hatred of them. “So, if you read a book with raisins in it, would you still love it?” She seemed a bit taken aback and had to think on the hypothetical, “If the book discussed the truth of it—that raisins are disgusting—yes, I would still love it.” “...But otherwise?” “I don’t suppose I would.” Franz nodded as if though he had made a point, though neither of them were arguing a point, and went back to reading. Alanna managed to sell a few more baked goods to interested people passing by and it was nearing late afternoon. When she wasn’t selling she would try to engage Franz in conversation and he wouldn’t have minded usually but it was slightly annoying to continually be interrupted in the middle of it. He didn’t want to snap at Alanna and potentially make her displeased with him, so he would always just read to the end of the page and then participate in whatever she wanted to talk about—usually about where he was at and what he thought so far of the plot. His nose was buried in his book, his brain half-concentrating on Alanna and half-reading which made for a disconnected experience.. But Alanna knew not to spoil it for him, and she was excellent at talking about books without giving away the plot points, which he appreciated anytime they discussed books he hadn’t read yet. “Another customer,” he mumbled, noticing some incoming movement. He could tell from listening they were most likely a woman because there was a distinct click of heels on the sidewalk. “Good afternoon Ma'am!” “Afternoon,” the woman said while continuing to pass. Maybe not a customer after all. Her voice was only vaguely familiar to Franz’s ears. He assumed he’d heard it before from a bakery patron. “Could we interest you in a muffin? We did have chocolate chip cookies but they sold out.” Alanna said. Franz didn’t see the point of her even bringing up the cookies unless it was to subtly remind him to bake more. “No thank you, I’m actually on my way to…” the clicking of her heels halted, “…the bakery.”

That was odd. Why would she have stopped if their destination was not here at the bake sale? Franz suddenly felt like he was being watched; he glanced up. The woman was looking at him with slightly narrowed eyes as if trying to recognize him. He knew who she was. He had her business card. “Aren’t you the baker’s son?” Shelby Barnett asked. Franz set his book in his lap and crossed his arms. He nodded. “Well, perhaps you can save me a trip,” she opened the side of her leather briefcase and pulled out a paper. “This is the last paper I need your mother to sign to complete the sale of the property.” Franz prickled with immense agitation. It wasn’t just 'property.’ It was his childhood. It was the legacy of his family that was on the table for sale. Nothing as impersonal and simple as 'property.’ “No,” he replied and picked up his book, flipping through to last page he could remember. Alanna was staring at them wide-eyed, not having even expected this was the woman who represented the impending end to the bakery. “Excuse me?” Shelby Barnett was taken aback by his recalcitrant response. “Do your job and deliver it yourself. After all, you are head of development,” Franz elaborated slightly and didn’t look away from the pages as he flipped through them. He really ought to have brought a bookmark. He didn’t sound particularly angry but his delivery of the words oozed with resentment.

“It’s one document!” Shelby frowned and held out her index finger to emphasize that fact. Her voice began to rise with irritation and her brow plummeted at his non-compliance. She seemed used to having her requests fulfilled. How could she not, being someone that made deals to buy up others’ cherished businesses? “If it’s too hard of a task for you to comprehend, you must be some kind of…imbecile!” Franz slammed his book on the table face-down and stood all in one swoop, anger erupting through his usual placid features and creating quite a scary visage instead. His arms lashed out and he made the same gesture of his index finger on one hand while the other curled into a fist, and he growled, “If you can’t deliver your one document then I doubt I'm the imbecile here.” Alanna had crossed her arms and her usually friendly demeanor had turned cold as soon as the woman had insulted Franz. Shelby Barnett flinched and took a step backward, suddenly showing a hint of fear at the beast she had awoken with her insult. She took a breath and kept her glare, “I take it back, you’re not an imbecile, you’re just an asshole.”

“He is not!” Alanna made an outburst of anger before Franz could respond. It surprised him momentarily because he’d never heard her shout like that before. Alanna picked up a frosted cupcake and hurled it at the Cosgrove Collective’s head of development. It grazed the woman’s work blouse, leaving a trail of chocolate across her shoulder. “Now get out of here before I throw another!“ Shelby Barnett kept a nearly incredulous yet contemptuous glare and stuffed the document back into her briefcase as she turned to get away from them. As she walked away she called over her shoulder, "You better get used to selling your goods on the street because you won’t have a bakery by next week.” Pompf. Another cupcake hit her in the back, this time it was thrown by Franz and it was a harder hit since Franz had a more powerful arm. She turned around with a scowl of pure hatred and then moved quickly to put distance between herself and the bake sale before either of them could throw another cupcake at her. Alanna popped a giggle and Franz looked to her in bewilderment. What about that exchange was humorous? He didn’t have to voice his question before she answered, “I don't think she's going to tell her friends we're here 'till 4:00.” "How could she? You didn't let her know," he shrugged, but he still felt very riled and on edge. It wasn’t often people stoked the flames of his temper to a level that caused him to react. Franz had been taunted before with the same caliber of name calling—because he took his time to speak, because he had been held back a grade, and because he didn’t often make eye contact with those that spoke to him. He hated it and thought he was done with that juvenile behavior once he graduated high school. “Thanks,” he said and sat back against the planter. “For what?” “For standing up for me,” he answered. Even in grade school when he was teased, no one ever contradicted the name-calling. Most of his schoolmates believed he really was all the unkind names he had been called. Alanna smiled with a small spark of sympathy in her eyes; she understood. It was one of a hundred reasons he was grateful to be her friend. Some more people were coming. They both looked forward and saw Reggie Orbinson sauntering along, across the street and clearly smiling at the sight of Alanna. Franz felt his arm muscles involuntarily contract in anticipation of use at the sight of Reggie approaching. Alanna quickly put herself in front of him so he had no choice but to listen to her and his view of Reggie was obstructed since he was still leaning on the planter and not at full height. “I invited Reggie to come check out the bake sale. He might buy a good amount and we need to sell. Whatever there is between you two, let it go and please do not make a scene.”

Alanna was the thing between them. Now, literally and figuratively back when the friendship went south. It wasn’t the typical guys-fighting-over-the-same-girl trope either that was so common in young adult novels or 'love triangles’ as people called them. Franz only defended his right to be her friend and Reggie was always the one insisting there was more to their relationship. Maybe because Reggie was selfish and entitled enough to think he was the only one who deserved Alanna Thackery’s attentions, romantic or otherwise. Franz didn’t have the energy to argue, but gave a small nod of agreement since Alanna’s gaze was so adamant. She smiled in thanks and turned around to greet Reggie. “Hey there,” Reggie said, not paying mind to Franz, who was just sitting there with his eyes narrowed to near slits and filled with pure animosity. He didn't mind, he was used to not being noticed or acknowledged by most people. “Hey Reggie. Thanks for coming, let me know if you see anything you want to buy,” she said with a warm smile. “No problem, I said I would come,” he said and looked over the treats displayed on the table. He brought his hand to his chin, “Any recommendations?” “Well we sold out of my favorites—the chocolate chip cookies—but these scones are pretty scrumptious. They are made with honey and pecans. Or the muffins, they are slightly crispy on the tops and then soft as clouds in the center.” Franz ripped his gaze away, noticing that some red-headed kids were observing the table of goods as well. One was photographing the muffins. They didn’t seem familiar at all, which was uncommon for a small island town. “What are you doing?” Franz asked in a low, near-threatening voice. “Taking pics, what does it look like?” The teenage boy said. His voice was irritating, and made Franz want to punch him just for talking. The girl, who stood next to him and must have been his twin sister–since they looked so very similar—flipped her hair as the boy stood and took another picture. “Don’t mind him, he’s hopeless. We’re from Memosa Bay High School; we're on the newspaper staff and I have an assignment to write about the charming things that go on in Isla Del Kashmire. This bake sale looks cute enough so I thought I’d write about it. Can I get some more information from you about this?” Franz heaved a deep sigh–he hated talking to people and this seemed right up Alanna’s alley–but when he glanced toward Alanna, he could see she was still occupied with pointing out more of the edibles for Reggie’s consideration, “Sure.” “I think you’ve sold me on the muffins,” Reggie finally picked something. Alanna gave a little yip of encouraging glee and asked him how many he wanted. To her surprise, he wanted the whole baker’s dozen! “And throw on that row of scones for good measure. Mom will love them,” Reggie added. She took his cash and bagged him the whole amount of goods. That was one heck of a sale! She stepped out from behind the bake sale table and thanked him profusely for his patronage before giving him a hug of gratitude. He gladly received it and then asked, “Are you still able to come with me to check out what I’m working on for the robotics group?” “Yeah, it’ still on my schedule.” “Great, that’s…so great,” he smiled in relief and swapped the bag from hand to hand with a bit of awkwardness, “Do you want to me to pick you up?” Alanna seemed to think about it and then nodded, “Yeah it will save time I think. Are you coming back to Isla Del Kashmire after?” “I can if you need me too. I can drive you anywhere,” he replied. “Yeah, just pick me up whenever you are headed out then and I’d like to come back here if it’s not a problem, thanks Reggie! ” Alanna confirmed. She gave him another hug in farewell. Franz's attention had been split trying to listen to Alanna's conversation and answer this girls’ questions about the bake sale. He also name dropped his mother’s bakery in case it could help in anyway–increasing business or adding to the customer base. The girl finally seemed satisfied and took her brother away from the bake sale. They hadn’t even bought anything which annoyed Franz. What annoyed him even more was how Alanna kept embracing Reggie the whole time. It wasn’t that he was jealous, but in Franz’s opinion, Reggie didn’t deserve to get the same warm and welcoming treatment she gave to nearly everyone else. She didn’t know him like Franz had.

“You’re hanging out with Reggie again?” Franz asked. He felt a bit sour because she never seemed to have the availability to hang out with him most of the time yet she went and made time for Reggie. “Yeah, he invited me to see the robotics group at Sim State,” she answered as she was looking at her cell phone. She was checking the hour. It was almost time for them to pack up. They agreed she would take any extra baked goods to her parents’ home because if Franz did, it would arouse suspicion from his mother. He couldn’t fit them all in the kitchen of the community college, that was for sure. Alanna glanced up and saw Franz’s frown of obvious disapproval, “What’s the matter?” “Nothing,” Franz bit his tongue and relaxed his expression to it’s usual impassiveness. He wasn’t going to badmouth Reggie because that was something Reggie would do to him behind his back, and he didn’t want to be the type of person that Reggie was, “Just be careful.” She knotted her brows with slight confusion, uncertain if Franz was making a general statement on her well-being or referring to the mayor’s son, “I will, thanks.” In a half-hour’s time they started to pack up the remaining cookies and muffins. Overall, they had sold more than not, so that was good. Alanna gave Franz a hug goodbye and wished for his mother wellness. She put the box of Tupperware containing the leftover baked treats in the basket of her bicycle and pedaled off toward her parents’ home. Franz knew that Alanna could see and hang out with whoever she pleased. It was her decision, her life. However, he was still bothered at the thought of Reggie being the one she did want to spend time with. Reggie had wanted to ‘start over’ and be friends but Franz saw through that motivation just the same as he saw through his sister’s explanation of a ‘friend’. Reggie wanted more from Alanna, and always had. What did she see in him? What did Franz ever see in him? Maybe it was because they were a matched pair as children–a quiet and awkward set of boys who were teased that had no business being friends unless Reggie was being physically bullied and Franz was a convenient friend to scare those other kids away. Maybe the real reason Franz was so bothered about them hanging out was because he had let himself be used by Reggie and didn’t want Reggie to do the same to Alanna. It wasn’t a long walk back to the community college. Leaves were starting to change colors and it was peaceful, yet Franz’s heartbeat was quick and he didn’t feel at much ease after the days’ events. What he felt like, was hitting the gym–hitting something–to give the punching bag a bit more wear and tear. Hopefully, Illyana Sanchez, the person who he had relinquished the bag to the week before was out of town for fall break and not in the same mindset. He had listened to her rant that day–it wasn’t pleasant, being yelled at–but as long a he understood it wasn’t at him or about him, he was more apt to lend an ear. He reached the entrance to the community college, taking long, hassled strides down the brick walkway when he unceremoniously stopped in front of the community campus shelter that posted ads, notices, and had a phone for emergencies. He took a breath and wiped the hair out of his eyes and towards his ear though the strands were too short to actually tuck them behind it. He had been walking fast while furiously thinking, a result of Shelby Barnett and Reggie Orbinson and the threats they posed toward his family business and the best friendship he'd ever had. A new poster had caught his attention hanging among the others—it was mostly red but what made him stop were the words 'fight’ and 'reward’. Maybe if he weren’t in such a state he would have shrugged it off. Maybe he would have stayed in and baked Alanna those cookies she had wanted so much. But Franz was in a foul mood and his mind was running on that fierce sliver of anger that was yearning to be released—so he had no hesitation pulling out his phone and texting the number on the poster for more information. If Illyana was in town, she could have the punching bag because Franz was going to find something a bit more challenging and satisfying to raise his fists at.

#ts2 #sims 2 #kashmiresims #nov arc #sims 2 story #my shots

[jdrichie-blog]

(JDR) One of the late nights drinking booze in the hotel lobby with the crew, it was decided that I’d be joining a group for a trip to Phu Quoc island.  This was a post-TESOL-course celebration.  I had planned on looking for a job straight away, but the allure of the island pictures and the thought of a few days away from the busyness of the city, convinced me to join (the half-dozen beers probably helped as well).  The group decided to stay at a hostel, but fuck if I was going to be staying at hostel (never have, never will).  I booked a bungalow on the beach, a room with two beds, and large enough to easily accommodate three to four people.  I need my living space (and space from people).  

  The night before our trip, it was someone’s brilliant idea to go out and try to pull an “all-nighter.”  I don’t have any recollection of the evening.  The next morning, I do recall the attendant for the airline telling me I smelled like “drunk”, and despite my efforts to convince her otherwise, I think she may have been right.  Our flight was early, like EARLY (6:30 a.m. or something like that) and I was knackered, shattered, and all sorts of ready to give up on life.  My body doesn’t always agree with my child-like brain.

  The flight to Phu Quoc island from Ho Chi Minh City is only 45 minutes, which meant we arrived before check-in time to our respective short-term residences.  As I mentioned, I was staying at a bungalow.  Once I arrived, they owners were kind enough to let me store my luggage and change into my beach gear so that I could go chill on the beach (their ‘private’ beach).  I immediately went to their restaurant and sat at a table with a view of the ocean.  It was extremely peaceful and quiet, but I did notice that this was a place that may have been for couples.  Nevertheless, I welcomed the serenity.

The “others” as I’ll call them (a total of seven, I believe) were unable to check-in at their hostel.  I eventually walked down to the beach closer to where they were staying (about a ten minute walk).  It became apparent as I walked closer to their area of the beach, that it started to resemble a beach on the Jersey Shore (not people, but rubbish).  After an hour or so, we made a decision to head back to my bungalow and the ‘private beach’.  It’s at this point that the choices made on this trip would begin a nosedive beneath the depths of hell (I even gave a what’s up headnod to Satan on the way down).

Drunk Dan and Innocent Dan found a place to buy beer in bulk.  The chairs reserved for the guests of the bungalow were soon confiscated by the ‘others’.  (The group was unaware that I’d be charged for them using the chairs.)   By 11:00 a.m., the group had overtaken the private beach and the restaurant.  We were wasted, but some more than others.  The group was loud, obnoxious, drunk, and unaware that it was not even noon.  We were met with glances that I could only decipher as “What The Fuck!?”  

Eventually, my room was ready for me to pass out for a much needed rest.  The others left to go check-in to their hostel (the thought of sharing a big room with people you don’t know just disgusts me, but to each their own).  Several hours later, we reconvened for dinner at a western style restaurant with fruity drinks and pizza.  

(HS) When you finish a vaguely stressful TESOL course in Ho Chi Minh city, what are you to do? Go on the lash, of course. And the only thing better than lashing in Ho Chi Minh City is lashing on Phu Quoc island, a paradisicial island a mere hour long flight away from our newfound hometown. What started out as a girls’ trip for three to get away from the boys (seriously, we all laugh at dick jokes, but would it kill ya to vary it a little?!) turned into a party of nine- definitely for the better, as it turned out.

The night before our 6am flight, almost all of us went out, and many of the group hadn’t even been to bed by the time we boarded. Although I had been in lame, I-should-go-back-and-pack party, I was still knackered, so god knows how the others felt. However, heroically, everyone powered through.

Going through airport security was something of a novelty for me; compared to the super-strict UK, I was surprised to discover that in Vietnam, it’s fine to walk through airport security with pretty much anything except a knife in your hand luggage (from whiskey to leftover Indian food to a cigarette tucked behind your ear, carpenter-style, it’s all good). Taking advantage of this, my friend and I shared some of his aforementioned whiskey on the flight (he stole my window seat, so he owed me) and nobody batted an eyelid.

Once we arrived on the island, we checked into our hostel (and Jonathan into his fancy beach bungalow, a safe distance away from us plebs) and hit the beach at around 8am, where the first order of business was, surprise surprise, beer. We swam a little and wandered around for a while until we found Jonathan’s stretch of beach to ruin. Within an hour, I was both drunk and sunburnt; a true Brit abroad. We passed much of the morning pissing off the bungalow owners with our rowdiness. Belly-buttons were licked (never doing that again), truths were revealed and it was made clear that we were not particularly welcome to return to that stretch of beach any time soon.

A particular delight that morning was the experience of getting to know Dan (mentioned in BJ’s previous posts) a little better. It was the third time he’d been drunk, but to be honest it seemed more like he was high: “I don’t understand words anymore. What do words even mean?” he slurred, in wide-eyed hazy worriment. “Why are those ants on the floor so big?” (To be fair, they were pretty sizeable. But still.)

By lunchtime, we agreed we’d pissed off the owners of Jonathan’s place enough and that it was probably best if we all got a few hours’ rest before the night to come. We headed back to our accommodation to shower, nap and await the arrival of Amey, a friend of one of the group who was supposed to join us on our flight but had gotten too carried away the night before to do so- I liked her already.  

(JDR)  After dinner, I suggested we should go to this hookah bar (they call it shisha) that I saw on my way to the restaurant.  We were all feeling better from the nap and the re-hydration of booze.  It was agreed upon that hookah would be the stop.  First thing I notice is a bottle of absinthe (um, yes please!).  I bought a shot.  But then wondered, “Can I just buy the bottle like I would in the States?” And YES, yes I could.  Boom!  A bottle of absinthe, two big boy hookahs and we were off to the races.  I was soon enough pouring shots for patrons as they entered the lounge.  We were given access to the music selection (always a big deal for me).  The night was turning blissful. I was dancing.  We were loud, but in a place where it’s okay to be loud, and making friends with fellow travelers.  Unfortunately, the night was coming to an end (we shut the bar down).

  Upon leaving the bar, the rain was coming down at a steady pace (not a downpour, but enough to where you’d be comfortably wet after a few minutes, and when I say comfortably, I mean my nipples are visible through my drenched shirt).  I began the journey to my bungalow, which was only a mere five minutes away.  However, in the midst of darkness, with the rain and absinthe drunkenness, I ended up on the beach, but not close to my bungalow.  The next 30 – 45 minutes of my life would be in the hands of some Greek God (or Goddess).  

  I recall trudging through the wet sand in a new pair of shoes (purchased at Nordstroms before my trip) with heavy steps, ankle deep in sand puddles.  Somewhere along the way, I lost my shirt.  I found myself wading in the shallow parts of the beach.  Soon thereafter, my leg was bloody from an apparent fall, but I was laying on the edge of the beach as the waves crashed upon me, in a futile attempt to wash away my infinite sins.  I was in an absinthe daze, floundering around like a fish out of water, looking like I was snared by a fishing hook, gasping for a breath of soberness and familiarity.  Finally, I somehow made it back to my bungalow, shirtless, numb, dumb, and incomprehensible, even to myself.

Yes, this was just the first day.  Not all of this trip can be summarized in one blog, and thus another will be dedicated to this trip (foreshadowing: a monkey runs across the road, Jonathan on a motorbike, lunch on a floating restaurant, lunch with the most adorable couple in the world, and a laughing gas balloon). Stay tuned.  

  Thank you to Hannah Stephenson for her contribution to this blog.  Please go read her blog @ How Far I’ll Pho for some wonderful writings.  Despite her resting “huh” face, she can be quite smart at times (and a literature major, so the writing isn’t half-bad either).  

Phu Quoc blog: part 1 (JDR) One of the late nights drinking booze in the hotel lobby with the crew, it was decided that I’d be joining a group for a trip to Phu Quoc island.  

#fun drunk #Life #travel #absinthe #beach #drunk #PhuQuoc Vietnam island vietnam absinthe absinthe #vietnam