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#lifes gonna be hard
blessedshortcake · 5 months
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I dont know if its the holidays coming up that has me stressing again or just everything piling up in general but its that time of my existence again when i genuinely consider serious harm to get some kind of significant help or care thats more than "just stop worrying"
I cant take school. Im too burnt out and i dont have time to recharge even tho i only have school twice a week. I have no help from my family because asking them for help will either get me forced to live with an unstable household with my sister or in an unstable household with my mother. In both cases shamed and reprihended but in different ways ig so its a pick your poison moment. I cant win
I havent been to class in months. Im terrified. Im failing i dont have enough grades and none of my classmates know me so i cant ask anyone for help. Im terrified if i drop out the gov will make me pay back the child support ive been Literally living off of since i live by myself and wont be hired anywhere because i didnt graduate yet and here you wont be hired without that for like 95% of job spaces. Youre either a student working or have your diploma or you dont exist at all
I gave up hobbies that cost money ive been doing my best to eat whatevers home so i dont spend extra money ordering in but i just dont have the energy to do this anymore. I want a job. I want a job so bad i want to be done with school i cant do school we literally have ptsd from school and no support from anyone around like family or teachers. I cant apply for therapy again because theres a 6 month waitlist and by then its fucking summer (probably) and even then it takes at least a year to start getting any diagnosis and i never managed to hold down a therapist for long enough. They dont take you seriously here in their eyes we were always just lazy or a little sad or haha teenage anxiety
We cant enter a school building without bordering an anxiety attack even if its just for like an art show or any non education related reasons. We cant learn due to alter to alter amnesia (OSDD i almost never talk about it on here but yea hi system here this is Hell) because in classes we either dissociate too bad due to the panic it causes us to just Be behind a desk taking notes with people to actually remember what we wrote if we did write anything and then if you learn anything at home theres a 10% chance youre gonna be the guy at front to take the test because, again, fear.
What the hell am i meant to do when i feel like the best option here is to either blind myself so i get to be excused since id have to restart my life pretty much or try and pretend i was hit by a car on accident because i cant sign into a ward here. I cant call a crisis hotline like "yea i wanna die it sucks ass here" because my family will again either force me to live with someone mentioned above or kick me out and then what. I cant do this im not gonna do anything harsh that could end me like thats not what im saying here im just frustrated and scared and sad about how hopeless this all feels like
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bluerosefox · 24 days
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Drake Siblings
Have I read this prompt somewhere or was this a fever dream from my bored mind.
What if, now hear me out.
What if we bring up Dana Winters-Drake (whose confirmed to at least be alive in the DC verse but no one knows where she actually is)
What if instead of when she had a mental breakdown and getting committed to an Bludhaven clinc she wandered away before anyone noticed and by the time Tim or anyone did notice a lot of stuff started happening at once in both Gotham and Bludhaven (Steph dying, The Bludhaven crisis, etc etc)
Tim still tries to find her though but even with best resources it was like she just disappeared into the wilderness and the stress of trying to handle more and more problems get worse.
So when out of the blue, a couple of years later, he gets a call from an unknown number. On his private, only for friends and family, phone and when he answers he meet with a young girls voice on the other end.
A very young, maybe six or seven, girl who informs him about his apparently half-brother Danny Drake-Fenton. And how she loves Danny so, so, so much but knows her home is dangerous for him to be in.
Tim is stunned and before he could question her, she says Danny is Dana and Jack's baby and that her parents had adopted him years ago and put Dana's stuff that the hospital had away for him to look at when he was older but she just had to fight off their lunch from eating her brother and she knows he needs a better place to live and so she snooped around and found Dana's diary and that she had to unscramble the nonsense Dana wrote and found Tim's number with the words 'tell him about his brother Danny' hidden in it. And-
But before she could keep rambling she hears Danny screaming "JAZZY THE MILK WENT BAD AGAIN AND HISSED AT ME!"
Tim is left with silence after hearing Jazz yell to Danny to lock the fridge and step out of the kitchen as she gets the bat.
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im a simple guy! i think about puppy Barnaby. i promptly explode into bloody heart-shaped confetti
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spocks-kaathyra · 1 month
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experimenting w making little trek dolls for the STLV craft swap :))
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astrolavas · 1 year
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thinking about the... potential clawthorne woodcarving mentorship.
+ bonus cuz also thinking abt how if hunter ever met dell's palisman and got reminded of flapjack, he'd probably feel bad abt making that association cuz he knows what it's like to be seen only as someone's different version (even though the bird wouldn't mind much so lol)
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#eda having that palistrom seed.. hunter saying he wants to learn how to carve palisman... his relation to clawthornes. it HAS to mean STH js#the owl house#toh#hunter toh#toh hunter#hahaa always thinking abt hunter growing a soft spot for palismen and loving creating and bringing them to life#but never being able to replace flapjack no matter how many palismen for other ppl he carves. I'M GONNA-#:((((( :///#like he's not going to want to replace flapjack just like that rn. cuz he LOVES that bird. it's gonna be so hard for him to just.. Move On#and flapjack's a PART of him.. so very curious where they'll go with this because..... HM. HM like he serves as his disability aid almost#and he can't just REMAKE him. but he cannot also just.... ignore what happened straight away. but it's also important to heal#but whatever he decides to do i feel like he'd love to just............ create. whether it be for himself or others#BUT GAH. ANYWAY XKJSJSK wrote an essay abt this already don't need to write one in the tags TOO. so uh .. yea#little guy.. pls find happiness#my art#fanart#hunter#hunter noceda#hunter wittebane#eda#eda clawthorne#dell#dell clawthorne#dell's palisman#toh art#edalyn clawthorne#also like...... if flapjack and dell's palisman were caleb's and evelyn's palismen...... and knew each other........#and while flapjack was waiting for his new person at the bat queen's cave dell's palisman was being passed down clawthorne generations#OUUHGHHHHGHHHH they were probably friends..... they Knew each other#what's up with you you mysterious yellow bird with eyebrows...... what's your story
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ninjautistic · 5 months
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I don't remember this but HOLY FUCKING SHIIIIIITT LLOYD WAS CONFIRMED TO BE AT LEAST 9 YEARS OLD HERE AND HE WAS ABLE TO DO THAT??? JESUS FUCK
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roach-works · 11 days
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ok im waffling on about fallout instead of having breakfast but i saw a criticism of how the prisoners were treated that's stuck with me.
spoilers!
so i think the criticism wasn't incorrect, per se: it condemned the way the show portrayed the vault dweller's naive intention to rehabilitate their murderous captives. it found fault with a common, and horrible, message that tv shows like to say, which is that carcerial violence and even the death penalty is the only effective way to deal with criminals, who are a fundamentally Bad category of human. im sick of that message too! but i think that wasn't what was going on here, actually.
so like, the vault dwellers had only ever experienced violent loss the once, and didn't really know how to cope other than denial and repression of the ordeal. but they were all hopeful and enthusiastic that their prisoners, the invaders that came to kill them all and take their stuff, could be eventually welcomed into the community as their comrades. the champions of this cause were nebbishy dorks and painfully out of touch academics. this is pretty normal for how prison reformers are portrayed, if extremely fucking annoying for those of us who ARE in favor of prison reform.
but so of course when the son of the former overseer, Norm, speaks up and suggests killing the prisoners, because why should they share resources with invaders who explicitly wanted to keep hurting them? why should they show mercy to their attackers? everyone is appalled by this suggestion. because they had to reinvent the whole concept of vengeance right then and there, because grudges and cycles of violence are anathema to a bottle society like theirs. they have been raised all their lives to forgive and forget and now, put to the test, they're recommitting to this ethos: get along, let the past go, look towards the future, believe the best of everyone.
but the prisoners die, anyway. the prisoners are killed with rat poison. and the thing is that Norm who suggested it didn't do it himself. and the prison guard who's blamed for it, even though she privately agreed with Norm that the prisoners are dangerous and unforgiveable, she didn't do it either. it's not a moment of triumphant, cathartic vengeance and it doesn't prove that there's no way to negotiate with terrorists and invaders but kill them like vermin because that's not what the message is meant to be.
the message is that norm stands there in the middle of these inconvenient prisoners, these corpses dressed in his own people's uniforms, and he looks at the new overseer. and he knows that she killed them, and she knows that he knows. she wanted him to know. this is her message and he's reading her loud and clear. and he doesn't look like a guy who's just been backed up by authority, who's just been validated in his desire for the ultimate control over those who have wronged him.
he's scared and pale and the music is ominous as fuck. and he's inside the cell, he's directly in the middle of it.
because what just happened is that he realized his entire society is being held prisoner, and the overseer is the one with the rat poison. and that he doesn't know, anymore, what freedom and safety and justice actually mean, just that he doesn't have them and he doesn't know where to find them.
that's what that scene meant. not that rehabilitative justice is a pathetic delusion of people who have no idea how to make hard choices.
but that before you advocate for killing prisoners, you might want to see how big that prison is, first.
and which side of the bars you're standing on.
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sophies-junkyard · 7 months
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SO excited to see how Marceline is gonna react to Simon’s decision. Like. Simon is so deep in his own shit he has NO IDEA how angry she would be if she knew his plan. And there have been a lot of nods to this. I think it’s very intentional that we the audience saw little Frozen Marcy, but Simon didn’t. He’s not thinking about her right now. Her absence in these universes feels so pointed, ya know?
I mean think about Farm World. We know that in the Farm World universe Marcy guarded Simon’s body for a THOUSAND YEARS. She never left his side, lest the crown fall into someone else’s hands. She went mad with only the memory of his voice to keep her company… but he doesn’t know that. He doesn’t seem to fully understand what his transformation did to her.
It’s not super clear how much they’ve talked about it, but knowing both their characters I’m wondering how open Marceline was about her experience with the Ice King. How she could never get through to him even when she cried and pleaded. That she held onto Hambo for a thousand years. That she constantly watched him hurt the people she loved. That she was such a stranger to him that he tried to KISS HER??? Did they REALLY talk about it? Would he be throwing away his second chance if he knew how badly it would hurt her?
“All Simon ever wanted was to see Betty again”. And all Marceline ever wanted was to have Simon back. It’s what Betty wanted too.
I cannot WAIT for the reckoning.
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ohno-the-sun · 3 months
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Sol
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vanhelsingapologist · 4 months
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Publishing has always been a fucking nightmare, but now it’s a layer of hell. It’s not enough that writers be good at what they do. Writers have to maintain an active social media presence and cultivate a following. Be available.
They have to be conventionally attractive enough to look good enough to see on a screen, aesthetically pleasing, kind, funny, up-to-date on trends, socially aware but not so controversial that they turn off a brand from California from slapping their discount code on a video promoting a book.
They have to do all of this with no media training, with little help from the companies that are supposed to be doing this for them.
Of course, a lot of this isn't possible for say, the 40-something mother of two who teaches English at a school and writes on the side. She’s boxed out of an already complex industry that already has enough walls.
On some level, I think authors have always marketed themselves a little, but we’ve reached such a crazy point where we’re demanding the author become the influencer. Accessibility in publishing has narrowed from an inch to a sliver. And that inch was hard enough to get in as is.
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liam-summers · 5 months
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AtS 2.22 | BtVS 5.22
"The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me."
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kaogens · 7 months
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have u guys seen that one movie…… i think it was called vash’s moving castle or something
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bonus too bc i thought sophie would rock meryls outfit so well And i was right .
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4ce-of-2pades · 6 months
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Thank you @catboymoments for reminding me that The Book of Life is a thing that exists. Hadn’t seen it in ages. I love that movie.
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mochiiniko · 6 months
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Her heart was beating in her ears like a marching band
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I’ve been getting back into drawing stuff for Rhythm Doctor again because of the Act 5 hype, so here’s a silly comic based on Mic Check by ReneeDekobora2042!! It was one of the first RD fics I read when I first got into the fandom, and probably one of the best (definitely up there with Clipboard Notes, victor if you’re seeing this hi LOL) so I thought it would be nice to make a short comic of one of my favorite parts. More ramblings & bonus doodles under the cut :]
I started working on this about a month an a half ago, and initially I just wanted to work on this as a small silly wacky fanart project that was supposed to look more like this
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So like every sane artist I decided to make it harder for myself
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Also some unused sketches based on the Rollerdisco Rumble Reprise custom level by Kabii!
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These were my favorite panels during the sketching phase but I had to change the last couple panels to reference 2-3N instead because it made more sense timeline wise. Might render these someday tho because I'm still attached to them lmao
Last but not least shoutout to my discord friends for being there for my slow descent into madness (now if youll excuse me im going to go collapse now thank you for reading)
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crybaby-bkg · 1 year
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Trainer Bakugou who you're a little terrified of the first day you're paired with him. when asking for a trainer at the gym, you had expected the friendly redhead who always looked so sweet and encouraging and cut as hell. you weren't expecting his grumpy looking blond counterpart, who was all glares and shouts for his clients to keep pushing themselves.
you were hesitant at first, before you quickly realized that it was all a ruse, for the most part. he pushed those who needed that extra encouragement, but was more lenient to people like you who simply wanted a professionals guidance. so, after a few weeks, you liked him for the most part, and his looks damn sure made it easier to cozy up to the big guy.
the only issue you've been having with Bakugou though are the...coregasms, as you've seen them been named on social media, that you keep experiencing. the first time, you weren't sure what it was, why your stomach and pelvis kept tightening up. you couldn't have...climaxed, or anything. you hadn't even been touched!
but, as the weeks go by, and the workouts get more strenuous, they've become harder and harder to subside and ignore, and so had Bakugou's commands to keep going when you suddenly stopped. you can only lie and say its cramps so many times before he realizes that something is up.
you're midway through a good morning, when that familiar feeling starts tightening in the pit of your gut. you clench your eyes shut, shaking your head a little, as if you could ward off the impending feeling. bakugou notices though, frowning at your almost pained expression in the mirror, walking up behind you to stop you as you pull yourself back up. his hands are on your waist, and as you come up, you feel his bulge glide over the curve of your ass, and something in you snaps.
you gasp, buckling over, one hand on your knee as the other reaches back for bakugou's hand to keep you up as your thighs shake. you can feel yourself spasming, clenching and unclenching around nothing, secretly wishing you had something that could fill you up, something that you felt throb against you as bakugou leaned over your form.
"Another coregasm, huh?" he asks you lowly, his lips brushing your ear as you bite your bottom lip to hold back your moan. your eyes buck open though, when his words sink in, head tipping back to look at him in the mirror, only to find his gaze already on you.
"You knew every time?" you ask quietly, panting now that its finally starting to pass over you. but bakugou doesn't let you up from this position, especially since the area you're in seems to be desolate for now.
"It's hard to ignore how pretty you look when you cum, sweetheart." Bakugou seals his words with a firm press to your ass, his cock rubbing the seam, and you can practically feel the heat and veins of it through your thin bottoms. you groan under your breath, getting lost in the feeling of him grinding against you, when he suddenly speaks again.
"You still feel it?" he asks, voice low as he looks at you through his lashes. you nod, biting at your bottom lip as you meet the steady rock of his hips, watching how he smiles before slotting his lips against your ear.
"Want me to help make it go away?" and he does, in the employee locker room after hours. he makes it go away, and rebuild, and go away again and again until you're hoarse and your legs are weaker than they typically are on leg day. bakugou helps the ache go away, but not for that sweet redheaded coworker of his, whose fists have fucked his cock the entire time of watching bakugou rail you over the locker room bench again and again.
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egberts · 7 months
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callie is gone. it was peaceful. she fell asleep in my arms and then went quickly when it was time for the final dose. all i can do now is grieve and let relief wash over us. i know she's resting in peace
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