#more on The Other Side when i get to Eduardo

[yoinkschief]

Content Warning: Nudity (Nothing explicit or sexually motivated)

Also there's a gigantic fucking rant under here about this bastard I did NOT plan for it to be so long and I have this sinking fear the others will be just as, if not longer

Take this traditional ref sheet because I can't be bothered to make it digital right now

Sheet Translations and explanations cause I have shitty handwriting:

7'2"

Used to be 5'8" but you know how that goes XP

Whoag! He's tall! Seem experimentation can go a long way :)

★Strip/Mafia Tord is the only version of Tord who wears earrings anymore

I used to always draw Tord with earrings, specifically dangling earrings with upside down crosses on them, but more recently I've stopped doing that and instead draw him with only a tongue piercing that him, Tom and Edd all have matching (they tried to convince Matt to also get one but he was worried about it ruining his teeth), so as a way to homage to my previous design and because it fits him too well I gave him diamond studs :)

Hearing aid [picture]

Tord wears a hearing aid! On top of his eye sight being fucked in his right eye and not what it used to be in his left, his hearing also is shot! He needed a hearing aid on his right ear and on top of his processing issues from his ADHD he can't hear as well as he used to in his left ear (not that his loud bass music taste ever really helped)

Has no waist, giving the illusion he has hips (he doesn't)

Shawty's got no hips and no ass, the only meat he has is in his massive bohongas and the only meaty claw he has left, he already had a triangular shape what with his big ass rib cage and zero hips but going to the military made him even more top heavy so now he's even more triangle

Screen [picture]

His robot arm has a screen on it that's basically an apple watch but better because I fucking hate apple,,,, and yes it does say OPPAI on it, it's an inside joke between me and my lovely partner :)

Spectator Shoes [picture]

Because I think he would wear them, and it's a silly nod to his constant need to be in the spotlight and not sitting on the sidelines: that was the whole reason he left to go to the military in the first place, he was sick of being "Edd's friend" and not "Tord" if that makes sense, he needed an out (and just from personal experience of having people I know go to ROTC and/or join the military fresh out of highschool, it's a good wake up call for some, and a horrible fucking power trip for others,,, don't really know how that last one happens when the whole point is to get you to cry to your mom and beg to go home but hey, to each their own I suppose)

[picture] Power Core

Serves to connect to Tord's nerves, forming it into power to move his arm with

The logistics behind this are loose at best and a goofy thought I had at worst, but basically it's something like the workings inside of the bionic arm connect Tord's nervous system to the core which then converts his thought energy/brain's commands into actual movement, which is why he has one at his shoulder (to connect the nerves) and one on his hands (to connect to The rest of his arm, think of it as like the two power cores being connected via invisible string that gets manipulated to pull his hand up, down, to the side, and so on, and the bicep and forearm connected with the elbow allow it to bend more naturally). That's the best way I can explain it

[picture] The coat he wears on his shoulders,,, meant to pay homage to the coat he wears in his 2004 design

Pretty self explanatory, but since he doesn't have his OG coat (because Edd now wears it, more on that when I get to his ref sheet) this is what he's wearing, a big ass mob coat with gold trim as the accents,,,, I spent way too long drawing Zenigata's mandatory oversized detective/inspector trench coat to not somehow find a way to bring it to someone else's design

OMG! He nakey!

Yup. I'm very mature.

Dragon Tattoo [pictures]

Ahh the infamous dragon tattoo HC,,, at least I think it's infamous- I've seen a lot of people with it so, lol. Additionally, he also has a tattoo of Jason Voorhees' mask at the base of his neck/top of his spine, but it's covered by his hair so I didn't think to add it but there's a very cute story behind it: Tord used to have a snake (he bought it as a ball python,,, it was not,,, it was a reticulated python, and he only found out when he didn't stop growing) who he so lovingly named Voorhees because he was white with a grey splotch on his face that Tord swore looked exactly like Jason's mask, so, he got a tattoo to match with his pet snake. Like a queer.

✨Trans✨

I will never miss the opportunity to make Tord trans masc I love him so

[picture] Leads with his chest

Machismo or something, I dunno, but he has the cocky confidence of a bastard type air around him and so in later years he starts leading with his chest after he goes to the military, versus his past, more laid back, lead with his hips. And by laid back I mean both he was more "devil may care" and trying to get laid, because he's got the libido of a dog in a heat thinking he was doing something leading with his hips because all the snoody whores do it in his anime and he hasn't touched grass since he was in college,,, boy howdy was that military a good idea to knock some sense into him (even if that did come with giving him an excuse to be even more power hungry and that much more of an attention whore)

Still has no ass

Yeah. No amout of drills can give him muscle there, and trust that he's tried (mostly out of spite because Tom always made fun of him for having a flatter ass then Matt, a literal twink with scrawny limbs,,, though you shouldn't let that fool you, he's far too strong for how thin he looks. Anyway look at how that turned out: it didn't lmao)

Ouroboros Tramp Stamp

Another fun story to tell :) so, back when Tord lived with Edd and the gang, he got super hyperfixated on Vikings and their symbolism and artworks and whatnot (he recently rewatched all of the How to Train Your Dragon movies and it lead him down a rabbit hole leading him to want to learn more of his ancestry seeing as most Norwegians came from vikings,,, if I remember correctly, do correct me if I'm wrong) and texted them about what Viking tattoos they should get: Tom's was the Viking rune for "Wolf", Matt's was the Yggdrasil, and I can't remember what Edd's was. The reason Tom was Wolf because it just fits him, he's got that "lone wolf" energy to him but he's just a dork who enjoys being around his friends whether he'd say that to their faces or not, and he's fiercely loyal to them to the point where it anyone would be the first to die for their friends in the group it would be him. Matt's is the Yggdrasil because,, well I can't really explain this one, it's just cause it fits really, I dunno how to explain it. Tord is ouroboros because mmmmm the snake that eats itself is just fucking spot ON for Tord, and having it as a tramp stamp is the sweet cherry on top, self destructive habits and a drive to run himself into the ground to satisfy his insatiable need. Tord has no idea if the others got these tattooed on them (they did, and to everyone's surprise Matt also got a tattoo,,, though no one knows that any of the others got their tattoo save for them knowing Tord got his cause duh)

An interesting thing to note if you want is that often times people will get a tattoo of Ouroboros surrounding the Yggdrasil, so you could say Matt and Tord kind of have matching tattoos. And for the storyline, that can be seen as important

Also fun fact: Tord's original tattoo was supposed to be the symbol for lightning as a way to nod at the fact his name "Tord" is a shortened version of "Torden", at least in my headcanon, which means "Thunder" in Norwegian,,, but then I found out that symbol has become a N*zi dog whistle and by god this man does NOT need any more fucking N*zi symbolism in his design can we fucking stop with that. Besides, ouroboros is much better anyway, I think

EDIT: I REMBER NOW - Edd's tattoo was the Web of Wyrd due it being created by the Nords, the Norse mythos' equivalent to the fates, the symbol representing fate and the fact that your past actions have consequences on your future (something something obligatory EDDS-world joke and WTFuture joke) but yeah Edd's got this one like how the others do

- Hand Me My Shovel, I'm Going In!

Will Wood + The Tapeworms

- Dogs // Still Bummed

nouns

- BAD LUCK!

Jhariah

- Selfish Hate

JAWNY

Just some songs I was listening to while drawing that I thought fit him a bit and the vibes I was going for, I highly recommend you listen to these songs if you haven't already,,, P.S. for everyone who loved Panic! At The Disco when the band was still together and before Brendon started writing his own lyrics, ruining his voice and came to light to be a piece of shit, I HIGHLY recommend Jhariah, he's him but so much better I fucking love his dogs, his albums give the same vibes as the Vices & Virtues and A Fever You Can't Sweat Out albums,,, and I couldn't help myself I love Will Wood holy shit

Time for an info dump about Tord in this AU,,, be prepared it's so fucking long this has been stuck in my head for forever pleASE-:

Obviously, The End Part 1 & 2 are canon in this series, but Tord has absolutely zero regrets about it - he can't, otherwise all the work he's done is for naught,,, although it wasn't planned; his original plan WAS to move back in with Edd, settle down and continue his operations in London with his buds without them ever knowing cause he missed them, however, they got to nosey and so he had to abort with what he was hoping to have finished (the giant robot) but was unable to due to, well, Tom

"but how come Tord was trying to kill Tom, then, if this wasn't what was planned?" Because it was fucking funny, Kyle/ref,,,, also because as a side note: Tom canonically cannot die, or at least, hasn't found anything that can yet and he's not at the old age for that yet. He has what I like to call "Deathly Immortality", or "Cartoonish/Looney Toons Immortality" where he "dies", but then comes back like nothing happened and no one mentions it as any different

Tord has something similar, as well, but instead it's more of "Unfortunate/Spiteful Immortality" or "Anime Immortality" in the sense of where Tom dies and pops back up like a toon character, Tord is like an anime antagonist who just won't die, like William Afton he always comes back but in worse and worse state (He also got sick an ungodly amount in his youth until his body was like fuck it and actually gained an immune system for every illness he kept getting lmao,,, pollen still wrecks his ass though)

Afterward The End Part 1 & 2, Tord poured his full attention into his mob, experiments, and his projects, the thing he was basically trying to use his friends as a front for before Tom got too smart, since he was having trouble not being homesick for his previous life before he went to the army and got power hungry,,, guess you can't be homesick for something that doesn't exist anymore LMAO, anyway- in pouring himself into his work, he buys an "entertainment building", as he calls it, to launder his money: Midnite. Because he thinks he's clever or something misspelling Midnight. Midnite is basically like, all sorts of things rolled into a skyscraper, each floor has a different thing: A restaurant, a casino, an arcade, a strip club, wink wink nudge nudge, but basically this is where he holds meetings and such with his money laundering

Strip/Mafia takes place I'd say... Three? Years after The End? Long enough for Tord to get way too much shit done but short enough that bitter feelings are still felt between the gang for Tord and from Tord

Yes TomTord is canon, but let me tell you this is god's slowest candle wick, because Tom fucking GOES THROUGH IT in this story man, cause everyone's going every which direction, suddenly changing and leaving and he hates it in general because mmm parental issues of dead parents who left too early, the fact that he's autistic and fucking hates sudden changes, the fact Tord is alive is enough to piss him off, it's just all around not a good time for him and so the TomTord is very Tord sided. He's always had a fascination with Tom since highschool, but didn't really understand what it was until he had to be told to his face by who was supposed to be his significant other 💀 but Tord enjoys Tom because he truly is the only one who was able to keep him on his toes in his youth as he got older it grew deeper and he gained a bigger appreciation for Tom and his knack for always being able to throw Tord off his guard,,, to be fair though that's mostly because Tord relies on his quick wit, luck, and the gullibility of others; he's not really good at long term planning and thinking versus Tom who is amazing at pattern recognition and planning long term and for this that could go wrong, in other words, thinking and planning ahead

Additionally, Edd sided TordEdd, too, because love triangles or something, except they both are like bordering narcissistic personality disorders so it really would not be good for either of them to get into a relationship with each other, not that Tord really wants to (anymore? He kinda had a thing for Edd in highschool at the beginning but fell out of it pretty quickly, which, fun fact, is an ADHD thing: Edd gave him instant gratification and euphoria so, like people with ADHD tend to do, he fixated on it, but slowly fell out of it once he stopped thinking with his excitement about having a new friend who actually paid attention to him), but Edd is CONVINCED Tord is just doing all of this for attention from him like he's begging Edd to "save him" (he's definitely not) because Edd "doesn't have a savior/hero complex, stop telling people that omlll" so that's always fun

Errr trying to think of more to say without just writing out an entire book or just showing pictures of the OG script I wrote for it JGXXGJJXG

Feel free to ask any questions oml this AU is stuck in my head I seriously can't keep it contained any longer

OH

Drag/Street racing exists and is a big(?) part of this lmao,,, I mean kinda, it kicks off Tom slowly beginning to rekindle his feelings for Tord and shows Tom's relationship with Paul and Patryck from when they met in college along with Tord

Hooo boy college alone would be a lot to explain, so much shit happened in college but it technically isn't super important to the story? Besides the Paul and Patryck meeting Tom and Tord thing, ofc, but like what happened in college follows my general timeline headcanon of Eddsworld and it's a lot to explain when most of it just gives reason as to why Tom and Tord hate each other/bicker a lot when they move in together and gives a more in depth reading of their relationship and behaviors, moreso as to why they fell into stuck a pitiful state (butterfly affect baby, ONE action called them to both fall over the edge)

Also, I have a list of people I've based/referenced for Tord as Red Leader and it goes as follows:

Gustavo Fring - Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul

Professor Venomous - O.K. K.O., Let's Be Heroes!

Lord BoxMan - O.K. K.O., Let's Be Heroes!

Bill Cipher - Gravity Falls

Dr. Robotnik - Sonic Franchise

Yes I'm aware how chaotic that listing is lmao, but to be fair when I think Red Leader I think calculated and cunning like Fring and Venomous, but also stupid loony silly like BoxMan,, and of course a menace to society like Cipher and Robotnik

That's all for Tord I believe,,, I'll do more soon I'm sure

One last Tord appreciation:

Have I expressed how much I love drawing people's torsos, I think they're gorgeous

#I've reworked this god forsaken AU three times now #please #i can't wait to explain the other characters I'm getting so giddy about it eeeEEEeeEEe- #i genuinely have thought about most every character and where they are in this story #save for Kim and Katya. and Bing and Larry for the most part #like Bing and Larry work for/with Tord and Kim and Katya work with The Other Side but that's about all i have for them #more on The Other Side when i get to Eduardo #Strip/Mafia #S/M #Strip/Mafia AU #Eddsworld Strip/Mafia #Eddsworld AU #EW AU #EW S/M #ew tord #Tord #red Leader #WTFuture Tord #WTFuture red Leader #S/M Tord #S/M Red Leader #Strip/Mafia Tord #Strip/Mafia Red Leader #cw // nudity #cw // transitional scars #eddsworld #ew #jay draws #jay talk

[judithhhh]

fan (one-shot)

jude x reader

summary: jude gets excited thinking that his girlfriend is an even bigger fan of his football that he thought but is quick to be dissapointed

fluff! nd it's quite short but hope u still like it!

you were sitting on the couch, ready for the routine you had installed for your sunday afternoon. it consisted of waiting for jude on the couch while you ate and watched something on the tv. you had been scrolling through movies and videos for a good fifteen minutes and was forced to settle on a random one before your food got too cold. strangely the video ended up being jude's highlights from his first matches at real madrid and as someone who loved football you were quickly immersed in the video, even more impressed at the fact that your boyfriend was the one handling the ball with such ease. unbeknown to you, jobe, who had been visiting you two in madrid, had come into the living room and was now rolling his eyes at your enamoured behavior. the younger bellingham, who was always the first one to gag or laugh when you and jude displayed any kind of love, sighed seeing that you could not even go a day without seeing jude and now settled on watching his highlights to avoid missing him. well that's what he presumed as he did not know you had stumbled accidentally on the video. he took out his phone and took a video of your focused face before panning to jude on the screen. he posted the video to his close friends story tagging jude and adding two annoyed emojis.

jude had just gotten to the lockers room when he opened his phone and saw the story his brother tagged him in. his eyes widened with adoration and proudness at the video. his mind was racing at the thought of you picking a video of him to watch, and with such admiration in your eyes. his teammates sitting a few meters away looked at him weirdly after hearing the schoolgirl-like giggle emitted from jude.

"you good bro?" asked camavinga jokingly

"you'll understand when you get a girlfriend as perfect as mine"

eduardo rolled his eyes but didn't say anything back, too used to his friend's smitten behavior.

jude kept thinking about the video on the way home. he knew you loved watching him play but he didn't know about your habit of going through his highlights. he couldn't feel more proud of himself than at this moment. he hurriedly took off his shoes and training bag, and rushed to you on the couch. you got confused seeing him so excited to see you but accepted his hug nonetheless.

"how are you doing my number one fan"

you got even more confused at the new nickname he just called you but decided to also ignore this and answer him normally. you two talked for quite a short time before the boy took the remote and started searching something in youtube.

"so what highlights you want to watch? when i was dortmund or now in madrid" he exclaimed with excitation

"jude what?"

"tell me so i can choose a video"

"why would we watch your own highlights"

you saw a flash of deception in your boyfriend's eyes before he mumbled that you could watch something else.

"i mean we can watch it if you want" you said feeling bad for him

"but i thought you liked to watch them"

"why would you think that love?"

jude sighed and reluctantly showed you jobe's story, his face getting flustered when he saw you contain your laughter.

"i thought you liked watching my highlights but whatever" he said sadly

you were about to respond to him when jobe, who actually was sitting at the other end of the couch since jude got home, burst of laughing.

"you thought she wasted her time watching you HAHAHAHA"

"jobe shut up that's why youre single"

that sentence shut up the younger brother who sided-eyed jude before snickering at him.

"jobe leave your brother alone" you said trying to avoid another fight between the two of them

focusing yourself on jude, you cuddled up closer to him before explaining that you had stumbled onto the video and didn't watch his highlights usually. meeting his sad eyes, you quickly added that you still loved watching the video and found him amazing. that fueled the boy's ego a bit and he smiled at you.

"it's okay baby, it's not your fault" he told you sweetly

"it's jobe's" he added shortly after, sending a death stare towards the younger man

"bro shut up you're the one who got all excited"

once again trying to avoid a fight between the siblings, you dragged jude upstairs to your shared bedroom. there, you both got busy in the bathroom ; you doing your night routine and him taking a shower. you were still applying some products to your face when jude got out of the shower before wrapping a towel around his waist and sneaking his arms around you from behind. he kissed the top of your head and watched your movements in the mirror.

"you really don't watch my highlights?"

you chuckled and pecked his arm that was wrapped around your neck.

"no baby, but you know i still love watching you play"

"you better" he mumbled into your neck

meeting his eyes in the mirror, you smiled at him. you maybe had made fun of him today but the fact that he got so excited seeing you watch him still warmed your heart.

"you're so cute you know that" you whispered to him

"shush, im the one who's supposed to call you cute" he responded looking away

you managed to get a glimpse of his flustered face before he turned away, and you victoriously smiled seeing that you were still able to make your boyfriend shy.

#football #football imagine #jude bellingham #real madrid #jude bellingham imagine #jude x reader #football x reader #jude bellingham x reader #hey jude :)

[sunflowergirl522]

The Other Wheeler 2

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Wheeler!Reader

Summary: you’re normally the forgotten Wheeler to anyone other than Mikes friends but Eddie is captivated by you upon first glance.

Word Count: 5202

A/n: No Taglist for this series.

Eddie Masterlist | Series Masterlist

When you wake up in the morning a little disoriented and it takes you a minute to remember where you are. You’re still laying on Eddie’s chest, one arm wrapped around his waist. One of his arms is still wrapped around your shoulders while the other one is folded up to support his head. You lift your head up to peek at the alarm clock next to his bed to find its seven twenty six. You hold in the groan that wants to make its way out of you since you know there’s no point in going back to sleep if you’d have to wake up soon anyway.

You’re slow to sit up, making sure you don’t wake the sleeping boy next to you. You’ll wake him up when you’re done getting ready if his alarm hasn’t done so already. You’re quick to grab your clothes for the day along with your toothbrush and paste once you’re out of bed. The pattering of your feet is quiet so to not wake his uncle who you remember him saying would be home. You’re as quiet as you can be as you get ready for the day. 

“I was just about to wake you up.” You jump at the voice coming from the other side of the door. The man on the other side's eyes widens when you open the door. “You’re not my nephew.”

“No, I’m Y/n Eddie’s friend. I hope it’s alright I stayed the night, my dad kicked me out for a few days. I can find somewhere else to go tonight if it’s a problem though.” The last thing you wanted to do was be a burden or have anyone here feel like you’re forcing your way into their lives.

“No, that's fine you stay here as long as you need.” Honestly, Wayne’s just excited to meet a new friend of Eddie’s. It’s not often his nephew will bring new ones around and he knows it’s because it’s not often Eddie makes them. He can’t help but feel for you though for the reason you’re here. 

“You want some breakfast or something? There isn’t much but there should be a box of poptarts in the cupboard.” Wayne scratches the back of his neck as he asks, not completely sure how to go about this situation. 

“Oh, no I’m good. Thank you for the offer though. I’ll wake Eddie up and head out, I gotta pick up my brother and his friends.” You send a smile his way and head back into Eddie’s room, your clothes balled up in your hands. You shove them into the emptier half of your duffle bag and straighten up, hands on your hips wondering how you’re going to wake your sleeping friend up.

A bouncing on Eddie’s bed wakes him from the dream he was having of being on tour with his band. He stirs and groans not wanting to wake up and face the reality that it doesn’t seem like Corroded Coffin is going anywhere anytime soon, maybe ever.

“So is Eddie your actual name or is it short for something?” Eddie’s eyes snap open at the sound of your voice shocked to hear it before remembering the events of last night.

“It’s short for something.” He closes his eyes again, sinking back into his pillow.

“Well what’s it short for?” He just shakes his head not answering and getting poked in the cheek as a response. “Come ooon. You gotta get up anyway.”

“I’ll start listing names, you just stop me when I get the right one.” Eddie peaks an eye open to study you laying next to him arms folded up behind your head. A man could get used to waking up to a view like this.

“Edgar, Edison, Eduardo, Edward, Edwin, Edmund?”

“Edmund?” Eddie opens his eyes completely and rolls onto his side propping his head up with his hand. There’s laughter in his voice. “You really think I look like an Edmund?”

“Hmm, you’re right. You’re definitely more of an Edgar.” The look of mock shock and hurt on his face sends you into laughter. “You can tell me later but for now you gotta get up and get ready for school and I gotta go pick up all the kids.” You pat his chest and roll off the bed to slip your shoes on.

“Want me to go with you? We can take the van and have more room for them.”

“That’s a great idea but Max finally agreed to let me drive her again and I’m hoping that means I can get her to open up a little bit to me before I get everyone else. Oh, your uncles up and about by the way. I swear I didn’t mean to wake him up if I did. I can go somewhere else tonight so I won't do it again tomorrow.”

“You don’t have to do that. Wayne normally gets up around now to make sure I’m up. So you didn’t wake him.” Eddie gets up and stretches as he speaks while you ignore the sliver of skin exposed from his shirt rising up. “You want something to eat before you go? There should be poptarts.” The fact that he basically repeated what his uncle had offered you earlier brings a smile to your face. Turns out both Munson men are kind and giving creatures.

“I’m good. Dustin normally gives me some of the breakfast his mom made when I pick him up. But thanks for offering. See you later alligator!” You wave and make your way out of the room before stopping and popping your head back in. “You’re supposed to say in a while crocodile. It’s fine, you’ll get it next time. See you at school.” Eddie smiles and shakes his head staring at the ground as you leave.

“Maxiiine!” You sing as you knock on her door after leaving the Munson trailer. “Maxy poo, Max, Max and cheese.”

“What?” She can’t help but laugh softly a little bit as she opens the door with her headphones around her neck.

“You ready to go? We’re grabbing Dustin first and then the others.”

“Ready as I’ll ever be I guess.” You swing your arm around her shoulder and lead the way to the car.

“You get shotgun since you’re first on my carpool route.” The two of you slide into the car and you pull out of the spot you parked in.

It’s silent in the car for a couple of minutes and you continuously glance over at her to see if she’s put her headphones on yet. All she seems to do these days is stick to herself blocking everyone out with them. You’ve been worried about her for a while now.

“So how have you been? How’s school?”

“It’s school.” She shrugs and looks out the window.

“Anything new going on with you?”

“I broke up with Lucas.” Your eyes go wide at this new information. 

“You what? When, why?”

“The other day, he wouldn’t leave me alone and I had enough of it.” So in other words he probably tried to get her to move on too much when she doesn’t seem to want to. You’ll have to figure out another way to try to get her to open up to you then. You’re a little shocked Lucas hasn’t said anything about it to you though.

“Is it gonna be weird being in the car together?”

“I’m cool if he’s cool. Were you fine over at Eddie’s last night?”

“Yep! I met his uncle this morning too, he’s nice. If it follows the same pattern it always does I’ll be back home and avoiding my dad in a couple days. If not then I’ll ask Steve about staying at his place for a night or two and figure it out from there. I don’t wanna intrude on anyone's space for too long.” You were sure your mom would come get you again though so you shouldn’t even have to think about asking Steve.

“There’s always my place and I’m sure Claudia wouldn’t even bat an eye before sweeping you off into the guest room.”

“That’s true.” Dustin’s mom loves you like you’re her own having gotten to know you through the stories Dustin’s told her and the times you’ve been invited inside for dinner after dropping Dustin off at home or breakfast when you’ve picked him up.

Dustin’s already outside when you pull up to the house holding something, probably your breakfast for the day, wrapped in tinfoil. He barely even looks up until he’s about to open the passenger door where he freezes upon seeing Max in his seat.

“What happened to the rules of shotgun?” He asks as he climbs into the back choosing to sit in the middle seat so it’s easier to talk to you.

“Sorry Dustin but Max was the first one picked up besides you don’t wanna make her sit in the back with the rest of the pack do you?”

“Why was she first picked up?”

“I stayed at Eddie’s last night, pops kicked me out again. What’s in the foil?” You shrug in nonchalance letting Dustin know it’s not a big deal like you normally would when he found out. And as much as he’s itching to ask you about what happened the way you say it lets him know you don’t want to talk about it. So instead he looks down at his hand and holds out the wrapped food for you.

“Mom made you a breakfast sandwich.”

“Wonderful!” You yoink it out of his hand and start unwrapping it at the next stop sign. “We’re getting Mikey along with the Sinclairs today Dustin, so be prepared to make room.” He groans about there not being any room to make while you blissfully ignore it to bite into the heaven that is Claudia’s homemade breakfast sandwich.

You honk your horn as you park between both your own and the Sinclairs homes. Lucas and Erica appear first sliding in on either side of Dustin as Mike starts making his way to the car. As soon as it finally registers to Lucas that Max is in the car his eyes go wide and he fumbles around in his head looking for something to say.

“Hey Mike! Do you have everything you need?”

“Yeah. Why do I always get stuck sitting uncomfortably?” He tries to squeeze between Lucas and the door and when he fails he folds himself up to sit on the floor behind Max’s seat.

“Because everyone else gets here first.” You speak around a mouthful of food after you shove the last bite into your mouth. 

The car ride is filled with the boys in the back discussing and talking animatedly about the campaign they were in the middle of for their club with Erica calling them idiots every once in a while. You ask questions here and there to join in or talk with Max but mainly you just drive with the biggest grin on your face over having almost all the boys in your car again. It makes you miss Will even more and more excited than ever to see him over Thanksgiving break.

You pull in front of the middle school first Erica hopping out and Dustin moving over so Mike doesn’t have to sit on the floor for the last couple of minutes. You wait until they’re all situated in the back before pulling away and heading into the high school parking lot. As the boys climb out you put a hand on Max’s arm to stop her from getting out and running.

“You want a ride home today? I can drop you off before I head to work, the boys will be in Hellfire and Erica has a tutoring thing so it’ll be just you and me.”

“Can you actually just take me with you to work? I’ve been meaning to find some new music.”

“I can do that.” She smiles your way before getting out and heading straight for the school instead of waiting around like the boys do. Lucas yells a quick bye to you before rushing after her hoping to be able to ask her how she’s doing. Dustin shares a look with Mike as you reach in to grab your bag before starting to walk off.

“Bye Y/n! Thanks for the ride!”

“See ya Dustin!”

“How was your night?” Mike asks in a quiet voice worried that he’ll upset you if he brings what happened up. You just smile a little at how it shows he cares before shrugging a shoulder and looking his way.

“It was as good as it could be, all things considered.”

“Where’d you end up going?” He knows that the last time it happened you crashed at Steves and the time before that Dustin’s but he likes to know that you’re somewhere safe.

“I stayed at Eddie’s, figured it would be easy for us to work on the project and everything that way and then I wouldn’t have to bother Steve with it again.” You make your way into the building Mike sticking close to your side. “He’s nice. I see why all of you became so close to him so fast. His uncle seems like he’s a great guy too, I met him this morning.”

Mike is silent as he wonders how you fit in the Munson trailer with there being one room. He assumes that Eddie gave you his bed knowing his older friend wouldn’t have made you sleep on the couch, but he also knows that you’re not one to kick someone out of their own bed. His thoughts are interrupted when you speak again.

“How was it after I left?”

“Mom got home and Nancy told her about what happened after saying she’ll get Holly ready for bed. Her and dad got into a fight again, I’m pretty sure he slept on the couch.”

“Serves him right.” You scoff opening up your locker to replace the books in your bag with the ones you need today. “How long do you think it’ll be this time before she comes looking for me?”

“Honestly, I’m not too sure. She’s pissed but he’s being-”

“A stubborn ass?”

“Right. So she might find you soon but he won’t be ready to let you back in.”

“I should probably just start looking for a place of my own now. It’d solve so many problems. He doesn’t even seem like he’s ready to play nice again?” You shut your locker and turn to look at your brother.

“Not really.” Mike has to swallow the lump forming in his throat at the mention of you moving out before speaking.

“Great.” You roll your eyes at the situation. “Alright well love you Mikey, I gotta head to class and you still have to get to your locker. Eddie’s driving you home after Hellfire still right?”

“Yeah, he should be.” You nod, swinging your bag back over your shoulder.

“See you around kid.” You mess up his hair and start heading to your next class missing the way he watches you leave torn between wanting to be normal and not cause a scene and throwing himself into your arms for one of your comforting hugs. He hasn’t had one in a while and with the threat of you moving out and probably never coming around anymore he could really use one.

“How’d your psych test go?” Eddie surprises you at lunch by dropping himself into the seat next to yours at lunch before going to his regular table.

“I’m pretty sure I nailed it. Did your group get tired of your shenanigans and kick you out?”

“And to think I was going to invite you over to sit with us.” He tsks and shakes his head, getting a small laugh out of you. You rest your chin on your hand and lean in his direction with a playful glint in your eyes.

“Who said I wanted to shack up with a bunch of hoodlums.” He leans right back into you so your foreheads are almost touching.

“I’m pretty sure you did last night darlin’ when you were begging to stay over.” There's a moment where the two of you just stare into each other's eyes. Eddie’s flick down to your lips before he jumps out of his seat pulling yours out. “Now c’mon Princess your throne awaits.”

“Don’t say a word.” Mike grumbles to Dustin from where they pause to watch the two of you on their way to the table before stomping the rest of the way over leaving his friend in laughter.

“Guys, this is Y/n.” Eddie shows you off like he’s Vanna White and you’re the big prize they could win if they guess the puzzle right. “Y/n these are the guys. Obviously you know Dustin, Lucas, and Mike. But here’s Jeff, Gareth, and Adam.” He points to each one as he introduces them.

“Hi!” You wave genuinely excited to meet them all. They were just as responsible for making your chosen family feel accepted as Eddie was. They wave back with greetings and Eddie pulls out his seat at the head of the table for you to sit pushing it in before grabbing a spare seat from another table and pulling it up next to you. “It’s nice to meet you guys, Dustin absolutely raves about how cool you all are.” The boy in question groans and slams his head on the table.

Mike hides his jealousy from that sentence with laughter at his friend's embarrassment. The way you say it, it’s like you’re Dustin’s sister instead of his own. Like you talk more with his friends than you do him and for the first time it’s like he realizes that maybe you do. You’re constantly driving them to and from school while he goes with Nancy and he’s even seen Lucas search you out in the halls to tell you something before. Hell you probably even talk to Will more than you talk to him with your at least biweekly calls to them all in California.

Sure Mike talks to you at home but you’re barely there anymore and when you are and ask him if he wants to do anything he always has something else to do that he thinks is more important. He finds himself nostalgic for when he was younger and you would do everything with him because Nancy didn’t want anything to do with him and his mom was too busy with newborn Holly. You were his best friend for a while and now everything has changed and Mike can’t help but wonder why and when he let you become like a stranger in his life.

“Can’t say that’s true, we’re a bunch of losers. Gareth.” He holds his hand out for you to shake and Eddie rolls his eyes into the back of his head when he catches onto the flirty lilt to his voice.

“Keep it in your pants Emerson. I’m sure Mike wouldn’t appreciate you flirting with his sister.” 

“Yeah, I definitely wouldn’t.” Mike scoffs out keeping his eyes on Eddie the whole time he speaks hoping it gets his point across. He doesn’t pay any attention to him though he’s too busy watching the way your eyes crinkle as you laugh.

“Y/n!” You could’ve gotten whiplash from how fast you whipped your head around to look at Nancy barrelling towards you. This was certainly new, normally she just acts like she has no idea who you are.

“Nancy?”

“Thank God I caught you. Are you alright? Where’d you go last night? I called Steve but he said you weren’t there. And Mike said you probably didn’t go to Dustin’s because you said you still had to pick him up in the morning.”

“You called Steve?” 

“Well yeah, I always call Steve when you get kicked out to make sure you got there okay.”

“Oh, Nancy pants, you do care.”

“So where did you go?” Her face flushes a light pink at the nickname she’s forbidden you from saying anymore and she pulls you to the wall to not be in the way of other students as she interrogates you.

“I-”

“There you are darlin.” Eddie interrupts you digging around in his pocket as he approaches the two of you. “Wanted to give you this.” He takes your hand and shoves a key into your palm. “Wayne’ll be at work and there’s Hellfire tonight, wanted to make sure you’d be able to get into the trailer.” Nancy’s eyes go wide and her jaw almost drops at his words.

“Thanks Angel Eyes but I’ll be at work until at least eight. I’ll probably end up there a little longer to close it up so you should really keep this on you so you’re not locked out of your own home.” You try to give it back to him but he shakes his head and crosses his arms in front of himself.

“Nope, if Hellfire gets out before you’re done with work I’ll just go bug you there. Besides it took me forever to get that off my keychain. I'm not putting it back on so soon.”

“Fine.” You sigh, deciding it wasn’t worth fighting him about this and put the key in your own pocket. 

“Great, I’ll see you later!” He beams at you for another minute before he leaves to make his way to the drama room.

“You’re staying with Eddie? You don’t even know him!” Nancy’s eyes are wide with this new information.

“I know him, we have some classes together and Dustin and Lucas talk about him all the time.” You shrug while defending yourself. “Besides I didn’t want to bother Dustin with showing up on his doorstep that late or bother Steve with it again.”

“Steve basically adores you though.”

“Steve doesn’t adore me.” You wave the statement off and look towards the entrance of the school watching the sea of students make their way out of the building.

“Are you kidding me? Of course he does, you should’ve heard how worried he was when I told him you were kicked out again.”

“Okay. Now as confused as I am about what all this was about, I love you and I appreciate you asking if I’m okay so much but I gotta go. Max is probably waiting for me at the car by now and I don’t want to keep her waiting too long. I’ll uh, see you around I guess.” You scratch the back of your neck not sure how to say goodbye to her even though she’s your own sister. Sure you guys were close when you were little but after you and your dad started to fight all the time, around like seventh grade for you, she started to want nothing to do with you it seemed. She’s even called you the problem after certain fights. Which you don’t hold against her because she was still young and not even aware of what the fights were about yet.

“So um, bye!” You smile and wave before rushing down the hall to the exit leaving Nancy behind.

“You.” Steve scans the shop searching for you before he speaks eyes narrowed and finger pointed your way.

“Me?” You point to yourself in your spot on the floor where you’re stocking the cassettes confused as to why he sounds like he’s about to scold you like a mother would a child hand half in the cookie jar. He’s definitely talking to you though, there’s no one else in the store.

“Yes you.” He makes his way through the store until he’s standing over you, most of his weight on one leg and his hands on his hips.

“Why me?”

“You got kicked out again last night.” He folds his arms across his chest while you go back to paying attention to the tapes on the shelf in front of you.

“And?” His worry he seems to have at it is genuine you know that, he’s proved enough times that he cares enough about you to care about when this happens or something happens to make you upset. 

Little do you know that Steve’s one of the only people who actually notices how poorly you’re treated by your father and sometimes by the people around you. He got into a few little fights with Nancy about it when they were dating, always telling her that she should talk to you more and stop acting like you’re a pain to be around. He’s even thought about pulling Mike to the side to tell him to appreciate you more. After you met Robin and the two of you started having a small friendship Steve warned her that if she ever pulled something on you like Barb or past friends did he’d drop her so fast even if she’s his best friend. Because even though you’re older than him he’s brought it on himself to take up the protector role that an older brother probably would. You’re too stuck in your head and insecurity that people don’t actually like you as much as it seems to notice though.

“And you didn’t come to my house and you didn’t go to Dustin’s or even Robin’s. So where’d you go hmm? And you better not tell me you slept in your car again.” You had done that the first time you got kicked out and when Steve found out he made sure you knew there was always room at his place for if it happened again.

“I didn’t sleep in my car. I stayed with a friend.”

“What friend?”

“My new friend Eddie, he’s cool. Dustin and the gang like him too so I don’t have to worry about him being a creep.” You shrug and shove the rest of the copies of Wham’s album Make It Big in place before grabbing the box that’s now empty and getting up to head towards the front desk.

“You don’t mean Eddie Munson?” Steve sputters out lagging behind you.

“The very same.”

“What is it about him that has you all drawn like sheep to the flock?”

“Dunno, he's just nice I guess, I feel comfortable around him and so do the kids. What are you doing here anyway, shouldn’t you be closing up Family Video tonight with Robin?”

“We weren’t busy so I popped out to check on you. Where are you staying tonight?”

“I’ll still be at Eddie’s. You should get back to work in case it does get busy because Robin will just close and blame you again when the two of you get in trouble for it.” You place the empty box on the ground and grab the one filled with the records you have to stock up. You really should be doing stock after closing but you never saw the point in not just doing it during your last hour when almost no one comes in. You’d rather do stock than sit there and do nothing, that is when you don’t have school work you should be doing and you don’t feel like being in a rush to get home. 

“It’s Family Video how busy can it be?” He thinks about it for a second while you watch the gears in his head turn. “You might have a point though, I don’t need Robs throwing me under the bus again.”

“Exactly.” You shoot him a finger gun while resting the box on your hip.

“I’ll see you then Y/n, you’re still coming to that movie night Robin’s been planning next weekend right?”

“Course I am I got off work and everything for it, King.” Steve’s nickname, as boring as it is, is more inspired by Stephen King, his books being one of the first things the two of you bonded over, than it is his old King Steve title he had.

“Alright, bye Y/n!” He pulls you into a quick side hug, careful of the box of records before heading out of the shop.

Meanwhile Eddie’s dropping the kids off starting with Lucas and Mike because Dustin insisted on being dropped off last.

“So what’s going on with you and my sister?” Eddie chokes on his own spit at Mike’s sudden words.

“What do you mean?”

“Do you like her or something?” Mike leans between the two front seats, eyes narrowed at his older friend.

“What?! Why would you think that?” Eddie nearly crashes the car at his shock of being asked that. 

“You’re being really nice to her.”

“Yeah, believe it or not Wheeler, I'm a nice guy.”

“She’s staying at your place until further notice.”

“I’m just trying to help a friend out no matter how new they are.”

“You’ve been constantly giving her goo goo eyes.”

“Oh look, it's your stop. You two out so I can get Dustin home.” Eddie stops in front of Lucas’s house so quickly it would’ve sent Mike flying into the stereo if Eddie hadn’t put his arm out to stop him. He normally would’ve just pulled in front of Mike’s house first and turned around before dropping Lucas off but he’s honestly just trying to dodge all of Mike’s questions.

“We’re not done with this.”

“Well we are for now. Bye Lucas.”

“See ya Eddie!” Lucas salutes him before climbing out of the van. Mike glares at Eddie a minute longer before following him grumbling to himself. Eddie’s quick to drive off after seeing Mike get to his porch.

“Alright Dustin, when did Wheeler learn to be slightly nerve wracking?” Dustin shrugs and leans back in his seat.

“He just gets like that. Should’ve seen him when Steve started getting closer with her after him and Nancy broke up. Mike thought since he lost one sister he was just gonna go for the other one.”

“Was he?” Eddie’s grip on the steering wheel tightens ever so slightly that he doesn’t even notice it.

“Nah, he’s got more like an older brother vibe to their friendship.” Eddie lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

“But he’s younger than her?”

“Ya but it’s all in how he acts with her and with things regarding her.” Eddie rolls to a stop in front of Dustin's house and he opens the door pausing before getting out to turn back towards his friend. “It does seem like you like her though Eddie. And unlike Mike I think the two of you would be good for each other.” And with that he gets out slamming the door and rushing up to his front door.

Eddie shakes his head at his words, a small smile forming on his face as he pulls away and starts making his way to the music store since there’s still twenty minutes till you close. 

“Hey there Angel Eyes! We got more Abba in today if you wanna see if we have any you don’t.” And as you tease him with a smile that makes him feel like it’s just for him Eddie can't help but wonder if his young friends are right about him starting to like you.

Eddie Taglist: @sadbitchfangirl @notbeforelong @munsonswhore86 @navs-bhat @emotionaldreamer @magicalchocolatecheesecake @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce @fangirling-4-ever  @gaysludge @audhd-dragonaut @eddiethesexy @mazerunnerrose @tvserie-s-world​ @midnightsgetawaycar  @goldylions  @spacedoutdaydreamer @livslifeonline @mushroomelephant @hb8301 @ginnupp @saramelaniemoon @kaylshunter @nojamsonmytoast @vintagehellfire @esoltis280 @spikedhe4rt @let-love-bleeds-red @siriuslysmoking @toobsessedsstuff @alana4610 @gretavanfleas @sparkletash @aactuaaltraash @gloryekaterina @quixscentsposts @wormm-mom @eddiemuns0nl0ver @spookyemorockbabe

Everything Taglist: @bejeweledmastermind @matchamunson @bubsonnobx @practicalghost @katsukis1wife @crustyowos @yourfavdummy @protecteddiemunson4vr

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fanfiction #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #Eddie munson x wheeler!reader #eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie munson stranger things #stranger things #stranger things x reader

[e-munson666]

Just Us Three (1)

++Jamie Campbell Bowerx Joseph Quinnx Actress!Reader++

(You have a huge crush on the both of them, of course they notice, and they show up in your dressing room to "talk" about it)

Content/Warnings ⚠️: 18+, sexual interactions, language, pining, Jamie and Joe are Dom(ish), reader is a little shy, lots of fluff. (No smut in this part sorry babes)

I COULDN'T MAKE YOU WAIT ANY LONGER

🖤Lady Hellfire🖤

Picture from Google

During the Stranger Things U.S press tour, you had spent an abundant amount of time with Joseph Quinn and Jamie Bower. The three of you were really close......almost weirdly close. One if not both of them were touching you at all times, and never letting you stray too far away. You had it bad for both of them, but seeing the way they interacted with each other gave you the feeling the two of them were already together. All that did was increase your desire for the both of them. Causing a whirlwind in your brain.

*

Tonight was a big press party, and the older of the castmates were all going to be there. The house they were hosting the event in was HUGE, and the team arranged each of the cast members to have their own private rooms to get ready for the festivities.

You got ready in your respective room, picking from a large selection of sponsored clothing your management team had sent over. You chose a short, skin tight, blue velvet dress, with black lace trimmed around your cleavage. You knew it would drive the boys insane, and you were so happy with yourself as you checked once more in the mirror before heading out to the party.

You walk down a long hall into the living room to find Jamie and Joseph combined at the hip, they were holding each other, dancing together, and just being their overall goofy selves to the cameras wandering around the room.

Jamie caught sight of you first, elbowing Joe on the rib, sending his gaze onto you as well. Both of the boys nearly dropped their jaws on the floor as you fluttered your fingers at them in a wave, before turning and heading towards the kitchen to grab a drink.

You could feel their eyes burning into you as you walked by them, which made you smile super wide. You walk into the kitchen to find Maya and Eduardo in a playful argument about what qualifies as an appetizer as you made your way to the bar. A handsome young bartender handed your drink, winking at you while he did it.

You were about to thank him when you felt two large hands on either side of your waist. "There you are love" Jamie cooed into your ear. You look to either side of you to find both boys squishing you between them, Joe's eyes on the too flirtatious bartender as Jamie kissed your cheek.

Why did Joesph look so upset? Why were they clinging to you like this? Its not out of the norm really, it just doesn't happen in a public setting like this very often. Joesph continued to glare at the poor bartender as he ordered himself a drink. He noticed the young man's eyes travel down your body, no doubt marveling at how gorgeous you looked, to which Joseph became even more irate.

"Keep your eyes in your skull yeah mate?" Joseph spit, harshly grabbing his beverage from the bar keep, causing the young man to stammer out several apologies before fleeing the scene to find a coworker to cover his station.

"Joseph what was that for?" You ask, a hint of amusement in your voice. He leaned his face into your ear and whispered, "can't have him looking at what's ours." He chuckled at the little gasp that left your lips.

"Come dance with us love" Jamie insisted, winking at Joe as they lead you back into the living room.

The rest of the night was spent continuously squished between the two of them, never letting you out of their sight. There were a lot of male eyes staring at your beautiful form in your tight dress, and it was sending them over the edge with possessiveness. You didn't officially belong to either of them, but they were determined to make you theirs by the end of the night.

The party eventually died down, and the management team escorted the camera crew and catering team out of the rented home. You were finally released from Joe and Jamies grip as the cast mates said their goodbyes to each other for the evening.

As you made your way back to your dressing room you realized you didn't see where the two boys had run off to, but you didn't have to wonder long, because as soon as you opened the rooms door you saw them.

Joesph was perched on the end of the bed, while Jamie stayed standing, hovering over by the wardrobe. When they saw you they both smiled widely, turning to each other to share a wink before returning their attention to you.

"There you are sweetheart" Joseph says, patting the bed next to where he sat, "come sit"

"What are you guys doing in here?" You half chuckle, crossing your arms and staring between the two of them.

"Oh come on darling, don't act like you don't know" Jamie states, walking over and grabbing your hand in his, leading you over to the bed.

You sat down next to Joe, and Jamie sat next to you, sandwiching you between them once more.

"You look so beautiful babe" Jamie whispers in your ear as he places one of his hands on your bare thigh. You can feel the heat rising in your body from his touch.

On the other side of you Joseph starts kissing your neck, nibbling slightly every so often. You slowly began to crumble under the touch of the two men before you.

Jame noticed and chuckles lowly as he slowly grazes up your thigh with his fingertips.

"Wha..." you start to say before Joesph puts a finger to your lips, caressing them under his thumb.

"We want you sweetheart, need to make you ours" Jamie growled in your ear, nibbling at it as he spoke. Your body shivered at the sensation, which satisfied both of the boys greatly.

Jamie suddenly lifted you into his arms, gesturing to Joesph that its time to leave. Joe wraps an arm around Jamies waist as you were carried out of the house, and into a black town car.

"Back to the hotel then Jamie?" Joseph asks as he slides into the car, Jamie already inside, adjusting you on his lap.

The two boys leaned into kiss each other, long and passionately before breaking away and turning their gaze to you.

Jamies lips were quickly on yours, grabbing your chin and holding your head up towards him as Joe rubbed up and down your leg.

Jamie broke away from the kiss, tilting your head towards Joe before his mouth was on yours in a much needier more desperate kiss.

You were panting, heart pounding, at the utter arousal you were feeling from this experience.

"Lets finish this in private" Jamie muttered before giving the driver directions to the hotel the three of you were staying at, "I can't wait much longer to play with our girl" Joe replies, shit eating grin on his face as you registered his words.

The drive back to the hotel was a blur, your mind was racing, making you dizzy

"OUR girl"

*

*

*

A/N: next part will be filthy filthy smutty goodness! Comment to be tagged!!!

#fanfic #stranger things #joseph quinn x reader #joseph x reader #jamie campbell bower #jamie campbell x reader #joseph quinn #jamie bower #actress!reader #love trio #thruple #vecnussy #jamie bower x actress!reader #joseph quinn x actress!reader

[piratekane]

hey buddy!! for ur prompt thing u should do either 12 or 27 for avatrice pls and thank u :)

twenty-seven: i can't think when you keep looking at me like that

Ava pulls her legs up under her and turns, propping her chin over the back of the couch. Bea is in the kitchen, putting away the last of the orange chicken neither of them could finish. A movie plays on the television behind them, some romantic comedy Ava suggested on the recommendation of a customer, but she doesn't care about pausing it so Bea doesn't miss anything.

It's not good. She's never taking Eduardo's advice again. He promised her his girlfriend loved it, but Ava is starting to question her taste in men and movies.

"Ava?" Bea calls.

Ava pops up off the couch, bounding the few feet from the living room to the kitchen. She liked the open concept floor plan, being able to see all the space they had. And it felt like so much. She could fit at least 15 of her going in one direction. But mostly she liked the way that no matter where she was in this place they called home, she could see Beatrice.

She eases up as she gets to the island in the kitchen. "Reporting for duty."

Bea shakes her head, a slight smile on her face. Ava likes this smile almost more than she likes any of Bea's other smiles. This one feels like it carries the most affection, like she knows Ava is ridiculous and can't help but love her for it.

"I was going to ask if you wanted to keep the rice." Bea holds the to-go container, still mostly full.

Ava means to answer her. She does. A yes is on the tip of her tongue. But her eyes get caught on Bea - on the tank top she's wearing and how it accentuates the coiled muscles of her arm where they hold the rice mid-air. She breathes out shallowly.

She's not above thinking Bea is hot. And she'll tell that to anyone who asks. And to anyone else who doesn't.

"Ava," Bea says slowly. "What is it?"

Ava shakes her head, slowly rounding the island, feeling the cool granite against her bare arm where her t-shirt ends. "You're just so..." She whistles low, wiggling an eyebrow.

Bea laughs a little. "Ava."

"What?" She slides up into Bea's space, taking the rice container out of her hand and setting to back down on the countertop. Bea looks down at the her, amused, as Ava pushes in a little closer, their hips pressed together. Her fingertips walk down Bea's arm to her waist, curling in the hem of her soft t-shirt.

Casual-Bea is her favorite: loose shorts and soft t-shirts and hair brushing the tops of her shoulders. Really, every Bea is her favorite, but right now, it's definitely this version of Bea. She crushes the soft cotton in her hand and then lets her fingernails scratch lightly at the skin under it. She doesn't miss the slight shiver under her fingertips and she grins. Bea's eyes narrow in warning, but Ava can read through it and doesn't let it slow her down.

Ava presses her whole palm to Bea's couch-warm skin, curling around her waist. Her other hand settles on Bea's bare arm, sliding until her fingers are pressed to Bea's neck. She'll never get tired of touching; is trying to make up for what feels like years of missing this. Bea tells her she's being dramatic. That it was just a few months on this side of the Arc, but she always brushes a careful hand through Ava's hair like she knows it was much longer for Ava.

"Ava," Bea says slowly. Her eyes are starting to cloud a little and darken. Her tongue darts out to wet her bottom lip and Ava's eyes follow it, feeling her own throat go dry.

This Bea is her favorite: unafraid of showing what she's feeling, uninhibited. Unashamed. She knows how much work Bea has to put into letting herself feel things out loud. And honestly, that's the sexiest thing about Bea. All the aikido and the knife skills and the way she can crack a walnut with one hand pales in comparison to how free Bea looks.

A firm hand goes to her hip, squeezing lightly to catch her attention. "What are you thinking?" Bea asks, too quiet for the silence of their apartment.

It takes her a minute to hear the words. She's too caught up in the way that Bea has taken her bottom lip in between her teeth gently, letting it go slowly. "Honestly?" she finally says. "I can't think with you looking at me like that."

Bea's eyes sparkle a little. "Like what?"

"Like..."

But Ava has always been held back by words. So she holds onto what she was going to say, traps it behind her teeth and leans in, kissing Bea instead. It's slow, unhurried, and exactly the kiss Ava dreamed about for months in their tiny apartment; the kind of kiss she fought her way through hell for. Bea sighs against her lips, tilting her head to their mouth slant together like that's what they were made for.

Ava slowly works up the bottom of Bea's shirt, inching it higher and higher until a hand comes down on hers, trapping it.

Bea breaks away. "Dinner."

"Cold Chinese is the best Chinese," she argues quickly, darting back in to kiss Bea again.

Bea laughs against her lips. It's the prettiest sound Ava has ever heard. "I think you need to put it in the refrigerator for it to be the kind of cold that makes it good."

Ava groans but pulls away, rushing through closing the to-go containers, putting the reusable chopsticks in the sink to deal with later, and leaning over the couch to turn off Eduardo's horrible movie suggestion. She pauses, leaning against the back of the couch, and exhales.

Bea tips her head to one side and smiles. It warms something in the pit of Ava's stomach and she knows, if she really had to, she'd walk through hell every time to get this back. Nothing could hold her back.

#warrior nun #avatrice #ava silva #sister beatrice #i came i saw i tried #now i can crawl back into my blanket den and hide away #hope you like it liam! you're a rockstar

[octoberobserver]

Those Days In Between - Sneak Peek 3

Continued from the Reddie-fucked-during-the-27-years-and-forgot-then-remembered snippet from here & here

“So we…lost our virginity to each other then?”

“Seems like it, Eduardo.”

“Huh.”

“Yeah. Huh.”

Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

“That sorta…changes things.”

Richie caught his eye.

“It does?”

“...Doesn’t it?”

Tick, tock. Tick, tock.

The clock seemed to be getting louder somehow.

“You want a drink?”

“What?”

Richie shrugged, breaking eye contact and gesturing to the half-empty bottle of bourbon on his coffee table. A ‘gift’ from Steve that read a lot like a bribe for him to go on James Cordon and explain his shock exit on stage and subsequent absence from the public eye.

There was not enough bourbon or top-shelf whiskey in the world to make him go anywhere near that vapid asshole.

But it was cute of Steve to think one bottle of 12-year-old Van Winkle would do it.

“I uh…I remember us drinking straight bourbon once or twice over the years,” he murmured as he crossed the room to get some of the fancy glasses out of the pristine, mostly empty liquor cabinet.

'Bout the only straight thing we did do.

“And I don’t know about you, Eds,” he coughed lightly, his face on fire, “but I feel like I need a drink for this conversation.”

Eddie merely hummed his response. Richie could feel his eyes trailing from one side of the room to the other and fought the shake it brought to his hands.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were in New York, Rich?”

“What?”

“Bev told me you’ve been in New York for the last three weeks. That you had coffee with her when she was in town last Wednesday.”

“Uh, yeah.”

“I live here, and you didn’t say a word. Why?”

“I dunno, man! Maybe it’s ‘cause I was worried that you’d burst in unannounced and say, ‘hey, we fucked like rabbits then forgot multiple times,’ and I’d have to deal with that Twilight Zone bullshit?”

Eddie’s face was pinched.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me since Derry?”

“I haven’t been avoid—”

“I called you four times over the last three months, and they went to voicemail every time.”

“Who calls these days, dude? I text you back—”

“You sent me some stupid Spongebob meme. That does not constitute ‘texting back.’”

“Eds—”

“I knew it,” Eddie shook his head, hands karate-chopping through the air. “It’s weird. You're weird. <i>We’re </i>weird. We’re not gonna be able to get past this, are we?”

Richie felt himself deflate, his entire body crumpling in on itself as a rush of images, rife with those days in between…those days in the twenty-plus years where they were forced apart by an evil, supernatural entity yet still managed to find one another. Someway, somehow.

He let out a long, deep breath and spoke to his glass.

“We don’t need to get past it, Eddie. It’s…it’s part of us, I think. Part of our history. And yeah, it’s a little weird that we forgot that we had sex a bunch’a times in the ‘90s and early ‘00s, but it’s not gonna break us, man. Not if we don’t let it.”

*************

idk if people are still interested in this but I've been finishing up Helpin' Hand and it has just been sitting unfinished in my google docs so I'd thought I'd share more @fandoms-are-gonna-kill-me @gravitykeith @allaboutthedrama @4nemo1egend

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #it 2019 #it stephen king #it chapter two #my fanfiction #sneak peek

[comfortablecomfort]

Zaps!

(Yet another fic based of off @trrickytickle's lovely pieces of art.)

Ler: Eduardo

Lee: Edd

"Just admit it! I'm better than you!" Eduardo sneered at his rival, as they both floated in the air, battling fiercely

This all started when the Duo were on the top of their house roofs setting up their satellites. Eduardo had some kind of radioactive one, just to prove to Edd that he was superior.

Unfortunately for the both of them, it electrocuted them after Eduardo slammed it.

And somehow, it gave them superpowers.

Now, here they were. Eduardo was causing havoc in the city and Edd decided to stop him.

Matt was still trapped inside of the car that Edd threw at Eduardo, and who knows where Tom went.

Neither one of them was winning right now.

"Just give it up Eduardo! You won't beat me!" Edd challenged, now it was his turn to get cocky.

"Let's put that to the test then! It's my turn to win!"

And with Eduardo's little speech, they both charged at each other, punching and kicking.

Eduardo pushed it farther back then he first did when they started fighting.

Edd struggled to get up, but he was in too much pain.

"Ow..." Edd muttered

Eduardo let out a slight cackle and flew down to him.

"I know just how to finish you off." Eduardo snarled

He cupped his hands in the form of a ball, and Edd noticed green sparks of lightning coming out of them.

"What is-"

"Just my way of saying goodbye, take this loser!"

Before Edd could even react, he felt the sparks flying towards him.

He closed his eyes and braced himself.

But, the feeling didn't hurt at all.

He didn't feel shocked either.

It tickled

"Pfft, HEHEHEY!" Edd huffed a laugh, both he and Eduardo were confused.

"Why are you laughing?" Eduardo asked, raising an eyebrow

"HEHEHEHE *snort* EDUARDO, THAT TIHICKLES!" Edd giggled

"Huh? This isn't supposed to tickle you!" Eduardo growled again.

He zapped him again, but Edd kept giggling.

"CUT IT *snort* OUHOHOUT!" Edd squealed, starting to kick his legs.

"What the hell is wrong with this thing?!" Eduardo's temper was starting to get the better of him.

Over and over, he kept trying to zap his rival. But he wouldn't stop giving the same giggling reaction.

"DOHOHOHON'T! NOHOHOHO! *snort*" Edd let out more snorts and squeals, he tried arching his back to escape this supposed torture

Eduardo was starting to get tired, but he kept going.

"NOHOHO MOHORE! *snort* YOU ASSHOHOLE! *snort* don't tickle!" Edd already resorted to pleading, dammit

"I'm not trying to tickle you, Dumbass!" Eduardo finally let up, leaving his panting rival on the floor, clutching his sides.

"Ugh. Look I-" Eduardo tried to think of something to say next, but was immediately cut off by a loud roar.

Edd got up from the ground to see a giant one-eyed beast roaring at the both of them, with it's claws out

They both got in their fighting positions, there were only two things they could do right now.

Take down the monster and get along.

(Aight, all done. I wanted to do this earlier, but I was at school. Also, sorry this was short, I ran out of ideas, and I suck at writing dialogue.)

#eddsworld #eddsworld tickles #lee!edd #ticklish!edd #ler!eduardo #accidental tickles

[cositapreciosa]

hiii i love ur work and i was wondering if you can make a fluff one shot/imagine with eduardo sandoval? fem reader if that’s fine! pls and ty 😭😭😭 hes very underrated

Mañana por la mañana

Eduardo Sandoval x gn!reader, (no warnings, a bit of implied smut, being disgustingly in love?) 2401 words

a/n : throws some more Eduardo at you guys like you are unfed pigeons / this one was a rollercoaster, sometimes you have to : fuck it, and ball. He's so hot in this gif omg also thanks babe hope you like it!!

As always it's the fictional, not the real deal, enjoy xx

The sunlight is soft in the kitchen this morning, a gentle glow that makes you thankful to have gotten up at the same time as Eduardo. He has a habit of always leaving before you, barely crossing his path for 15 minutes every morning before he rushes to the car, a brief kiss landing on the corner of your lips as the door closes. Today should have been like every other day, but with so many running stories and new deadlines, you felt that going to work early might give you a fighting chance with the elections coming up.

The tiles are cold under your feet, you knew you should have fought harder for hardwood floor, but Eduardo was adamant that tiles belonged in a kitchen. You fill up the coffee machine with water, turning around to search for the coffee itself when you see Eduardo entering the room. His hair is still damp from the shower, wearing his shirt without his blazer, tie loose around his neck.

'' I hope I didn’t wake you up. ''

'' Not at all. ‘’ you answer back, head still in a cupboard, '' People are getting crazy at work, they want everything covered on all fronts. It’s a nightmare really. ''

He hmms, opening the refrigerator. After a second, he looks back at you again, puzzled.

'' What are you doing? ''

You sigh, leaning back against the countertop.

'' I don’t remember where we said we would put the coffee. You always make it, I wanted to do it this time. ''

He laughs, putting the two eggs he took from the refrigerator on the kitchen island, making sure they don’t roll off with his hand. You raise your leg, pushing his shin slightly with your foot.

'' Don’t laugh at me! You couldn’t remember the gate password for days! ''

Building a house together was the next easy step in your relationship. For financial and security reasons, this suburb not too far from town, in a safe neighbourhood, had proved to be exactly what you both wanted. His hand reaches for your side as he fights back, one finger poking at your rib.

'' Well, my old place wasn’t fancy enough for a gate, let alone a password, okay? ''

It was indeed probably one of the smallest two-bedroom apartment you had ever seen. His hand then grips your t-shirt, tugging you to him as you fake resisting his embrace.

'' Say ‘pretty please, my husband, you are the best and I adore you’, and I’ll make you a cup. ''

Your nose wrinkles,

'' I will not. That is blackmail, Mr. Bodyguard, and I can’t lie, I’m not a liar. ''

He groans, letting you go as he moves closer, putting his hand on the counter beside you, the other one stretching behind your head to open a cabinet.

'' I don’t bodyguard. '' He shakes the coffee bag in front of your eyes, '' It’s Head of Security, by the way. ''

You can’t stop the smile that pulls at your lips, the pride that bubbles in your chest. He deserves it, the title, the promotion, after so much hard work he puts in every day.

'' I know, amor. I’m proud of you. ''

You feel his tie on your chin as he leans to kiss your forehead. He takes a few steps back toward the coffee machine, pointing a finger in your direction.

'' Watch out because when I become President, I’ll make it illegal for pretty journalists like you to be that annoying early in the morning. ''

You roll your eyes, putting your arms over your head as you stretch. He is smiling again, proud of his joke, and you notice how he bites his cheek when his eyes land on the sliver of skin under your t-shirt,

'' Pretty please, husband, just make the damn coffee, will you? ''

You take a seat behind the kitchen island, facing him as he lets out a chuckle. You know that if you try to cook with him, try to take the pan from his hand, Eduardo would only tell you to sit back down. After a few minutes, he pushes you a warm cup of coffee, exactly how you like it, and a plate of huevos pericos across the counter. You lean toward him, and Eduardo joins you in the middle, letting you press a small kiss on his cheek.

You two eat in silence, enjoying the company, soaking in the smell of this new home. Even if tells you about all the meetings he has today, you can see it, how he barely touches his plate and plays around with his fork. You know he feels bad about not being home for dinner most nights, that he wishes he’d be able to help you unload all those boxes still taped up from the move. He does make up for it in many ways, even if you know he’s not noticing it. You knew that taking this promotion would ask more of him, of you, and of your relationship, but you also knew that his work was important to him, as he knew your career was to you. Maybe that was why being together had worked for so long now.

'' You’re not working too much if it’s what you’re thinking. ''

He looks up from his plate mid-bite, meeting your eyes. He swallows hard, pushing it down with a sip of coffee.

'' I know, I just- '' His hand reaches for yours across the counter, '' You do a lot for us, and I wish I could do the same sometimes. ''

His thumb rubs your wrists, slow, soft motions,

'' You just need to learn how this new position works, when you’ll start to feel comfortable in your new shoes everything will fall into place. ''

You keep eating in silence for a while. You can feel you touched something sensible from how he leans back to his side, keeping his eyes on his plate. It hasn’t been easy, in the beginning, when you started to go out together. It wasn’t anything serious at first, and him sneaking into your bed late at night or not calling for days did not seem like such a big deal. Until it was, until you realized how you always came second, until you realized you were not going to settle for that, especially if he expected you to be loyal to him to a certain degree.

You know he remembers the last time he had been promoted, how that time he wasn’t able to separate life and work. You had sat him down one night, one of the first evenings he had been joining you for dinner that week. I will leave you, you had said, I can’t keep doing this, I can’t allow it, Eduardo. That night, it didn’t end well, somewhere between screaming and crying, losing your cool, his endless explanations. After hours of silent tears and shaky breaths, you eventually fell asleep on the couch, the thought of feeling his warmth next to your pillow making your heart ache.

You pick up your plate, making your way around the kitchen island. Your hand gently met his forearm, cold fingers against his burning skin.

'' Talk to me, yeah? I can see you’re thinking too hard. ''

It is meant as a joke, something to lighten up the mood. Eduardo shakes his head, his opposite hand moving to rest on top of yours, his palm caressing your knuckles.

'' It’s nothing. It’s stupid really. ''

He turns to you, picking the plates from your hands, pushing off your attempt at getting something out of him. He sends a small smile your way as he walks to the sink, it’s fine, it means, don’t mind me, as he puts the dishes at the bottom, turning on the tap to give them a rinse. Discussion over.

The sound of the water hitting the cutlery fills the silence. You move behind him to set your now empty coffee cup next to the soap dispenser. A gentle way to ask him to clean this too and he does. Quick to keep busy, making sure the mug is placed with the pile of dirty plates, already working on washing them. With a small sigh, you lean on his back, hands moving around his ribs and up his chest, resting on his sternum. You can smell his cologne, the one he uses on days he has important meetings, the one he keeps buying because he knows you like it so much. Your head falls between his shoulder, pressing a small kiss to the cotton covering his skin.

'' You know I won’t let you go until you talk to me, hm? ''

He laughs, you can feel his chest contract with the sound, and that makes you happy, that he is not mad at you, even if you already know he wouldn’t. Eduardo keeps scrubbing at the dishes and you know he’s thinking again, trying to figure out what is the best way to explain how he feels. You know he’s got it when after a while he stops the water, bracing his hands on the edge of the sink, whatever is left dirty will have to be done this evening. He gently leans back in your embrace, your nose touching his hair. His curls are still damp, they smell like your conditioner.

'' I don’t want you to leave me. ''

It’s a murmur, so softly spoken. A secret shared between you and him, vulnerable and out in the open. Your fingers are running along the seams of his dress shirt, up and down, trying to be comforting.

'' Why would you think that? ''

It’s a genuine question to his answer, one you didn’t expect this morning. You have always been able to fix things between you. Taking the time to communicate, share your secrets, talk about your feelings, making it work.

'' I’m not sure, I just… '' He sighs '' Last time really scared me, that’s all. I want you to be happy here, with me. ''

Last time. It clicks then, that one night when you almost called it quit. I will leave you. I can’t keep doing this, I can’t allow it, Eduardo. You didn’t think your words would stay with him that way. Didn’t think much of it the morning after too, after he had gently shaken you awake from the couch, hot coffee in hand, just how you like it. He had slipped the warm ceramic in your hands and you had tugged him with you on the couch, watching the Saturday morning news in comfortable silence, feets touching under the blanket.

'' Amor… '' You sigh against his back, wrapping your arms more tightly around him. You hate when he feels like this, unworthy, useless. '' I am happy here, especially with you. ''

He nods, a hand raises from the counter, intertwining your fingers with his. You can feel the wrinkles on his skin from the soap.

'' You would tell me, yeah? If it didn’t feel right for you anymore. ''

You hmm, swaying from side to side slowly, bringing him with you in the movement. You are not saying much after that. You can hear the cars passing in front of the house, children babbling on their way to school. You would tell him if any of this wasn’t working for you anymore, like you had done in the past, as you would again if needed.

'' Te amo. ''

It slips out of your lips, muffled in his shirt. You can feel him exhale in your arms, feel the weight come off his shoulders.

'' I love you so much, Eduardo. I hope you know that. ''

'' I do. '' He whispers back, '' Y yo a ti, cariño. ''

You are smiling against him, giddy from the words even after all those years. You know it is getting late, that he should be on his way already, but you don’t want him to leave, soaking in his warmth, how good he smells.

'' I have to go, I can’t be late today. ''

'' We wouldn’t want that. ''

He laughs, bubbling from his chest, you know he can hear the sarcasm dripping from your tongue. He turns around in your embrace. One hand moving behind your head, playing with a strand of hair, following down your neck.

'' I can tell you don’t care. I’m not freelance, they don’t forgive tardiness easily. ''

'' Well, I’m sorry if I want to keep you all to myself. ''

His hands slide under your shirt, pressing at the small of your back, bringing you to him. His fingers are hot on your skin, denting the space above your hips. You are in between his legs now, hands on his chest, heart pumping. The light is soft through the window, colouring his eyes in honey, and suddenly it feels like you can’t breathe properly. His eyes fixed on yours, lips parted, he can’t look away.

'' You’re the one starting this. '' However he wants to call it, this, that. The way his fingers caress your ribs, thumbs following your waistline to the top of your pants. It is meant as a warning to him, one weak of any real consequences, a decision that should be logical given the time. '' You can’t blame me. ''

If he keeps going further you mean. You want him to, you know he shouldn’t, he can’t.

'' Maybe I can meet you for lunch then? ''

His palms slide to your hips, tugging on the soft material of your pyjamas, you are so close you can feel him against you.

'' We could make that work. How long’s your break? ''

'' 45 minutes. '' He breathes in, pupils blown. '' I’m sure I can stretch it to an hour. ''

You smile as he leans in, his lips brushing on yours.

'' We can make that work. ''

As long as you’re on the same page, you think, you know, you can make this work. The tiles are cold under your feet, the sun burning on your shoulder, his breath warm on your cheek. And then, his lips finally touch yours, a goodbye, a promise for later as you kiss him back, hungry for more. Te amo.

#eduardo sandoval x reader #eduardo x reader #eduardo sandoval #narcos imagines

[totally-a-different-person]

Maybe a Laurel x Eduardo x Jon smut??? Or maybe just laurel x Eduardo/Eduardo x Jon?

Very fun concept I absolutely adore them, and I know this is the sex place where we talk about sex but on the other hand just between the three of them the everyday dynamic in this world is probably so funny anyway (nsft and lighthearted degrading past this point proceed at your own risk)

Laurel was pretty much pushing Jon through the door, Edu shut it behind them as they came in. All three of them were drunk, mostly Laurel, and they were finally getting home. The woman was very giggly and touchy, very literally all over the other two on the way home. Jon squeaked when he was pushed down against the bed, and Laurel attempted to pretty much just tear his pants off but was, much to her annoyance, interrupted by Eduardo who had gotten behind Jon and picked him up by his sides to have him sit up on the bed.

He started placing surprisingly rough kisses on the blond's neck and collar, nipping and letting his teeth graze the soft flesh as he unbuttoned the blue shirt. Jon seemed to be very much enjoying himself so far, helping Eduardo slip his shirt off and tilting his head for him, giving soft breathy moans.

Instead Laurel got onto the bed in front of their sub on her knees and kissed him, catching by surprise as she dragged her fingernails down his sides to his jeans. He gave a sharp moan into the kiss, blushing deeper as she quickly unbuckled his pants, pulling them down.

She gently slipped the waistline of his boxers down, gently taking his cock into her hand and stroking him until she felt him fully hard in her hand, Jon struggling to kiss back as he whined and moaned. Soon the connection was broken anyway, Laurel looking at Eduardo "get the lube, I wanna hurry" she was incredibly impatient, having a bit of a hard time getting her own sparkly belt off with only one hand, not wanting to give up Jon's precious little noises.

Soon she got it off, only then letting go of Jon's cock, the organ twitching slightly at the change. Laurel unbuttoned her jeans, looking down for a moment before back to her lover, gently biting her soft lip and giving him a look that sent shivers down his spine, blushing a little deeper and giving a tiny smile back.

He felt a large hand grab his leg and have him spread them, looking down and leaning into Eduardo a bit more who smooched his cheek before getting up and having him lay back. Edu moved Laurel and got between their sub's legs over the edge of the bed so he was standing up.

Jon always did look so pretty under him, he really thought so. He grabbed the lube he had just gotten and squirted some onto his fingers. The brunette felt a little smirk tug at his lips as he saw how excited Jon looked, staring at his fingers while spreading his legs a bit more as if it was an invitation.

He gently took his hip with one hand, the one with the lube coming down to carefully tease his cute little hole, Jon tensing up in anticipation. Edu chuckled softly and leaned down to kiss his cheek, whispering "look at you, so desperate, we've barely started" he laughed, raspy voice making Jon shover as he blushed deep crimson.

He pushed his fingers in deep, the blond gasping and flinching a bit just making Eduardo snicker more. "Little whore~" he purred, free hand smacking Jon's ass, not incredibly hard or anything, but enough to make him practically jump out of his skin "AH!~" his voice cracked.

Eduardo added a third finger, fingering Jon harshly as he stretched him out, the shorter drooling slightly. Laurel watched, biting her lip hard and rocking her hips into her hand as she touched herself, panting softly. She had taken her jeans completely off, leaving her in just her black underwear and dark purple t shirt that complimented her form wonderfully, being kind of tight fitting.

Edu pulled his fingers out very suddenly and Jon flinched slightly, giving a little gasp and sitting up some, seeming very excited as he watched the older man lubing up his cock. He bit his lip slightly and attempted to sit up but was nearly immediately pushed right back down, Laurel putting her hands on her chest and grinning down at him.

Eduardo waited for a moment as she positioned her thighs on either side of the blond's head, using one hand to gently spread her folds as she spoke "open up, sweetheart" she spoke very sweetly, but Jon knew from past experience with her that didn't mean it wasn't a command. His cheeks burned bright red as he opened his mouth for her.

She carefully sat on Jon's face, biting her lip to stifle a quiet groan when he started tenderly licking, mostly focusing on her clit as he did. Though he struggled slightly to continue as he felt Eduardo pushing inside of him, almost putting the whole thing in as Jon shook and twitched, giving little high pitched moans against Laurel.

The woman gave a soft moan, laughter laced into it as she rolled her hips slightly, holding Jon's sides "Fuck... Just like that... You love that, don't you?" She smirked widely as he leaned back a bit to look at his face, her hand coming back as well to move the hair out of his face, gripping and hugging a bit as she ran her fingers into it to hear him moan again, cheeks a deep pink as he nodded.

"Just a pretty little slut~" Eduardo spat, spanking him again as he started thrusting, starting out hard and fast. That forced a very sweet, muffled moan that tore from Jon's throat, pre spilling onto his stomach from his own weeping cock as he was smacked. The blond couldn't help how vocal he was the room filled with his sounds of bliss, but that didn't stop him from continuing to service Laurel, licking as sucking as she rolled her hips.

She was absolutely adoring this, getting to watch Jon fall apart. She was standing just on the edge of orgasm, biting her lip hard as she grinned, sometimes closing her eyes as well. The girl could see Jon's dick as it twitched desperately while he was fucked, and awed softly as she sort of giggled. "Oh, baby~" She coed, gently taking and stroking it, listening to how her lover keened "You want me to take care of this for you?~"

Jon nodded quickly, Eduardo gripping his hips tighter and tugging him a bit closer as he thrusted. Lau leaned down to press a few gentle kisses along his shaft before one at the tip, feeling it throb slightly in her hand. She took it into her mouth easily, making sure not to get in the way of Eduardo's thrusting as she bobbed her head.

Said man pushed especially deep, listening to the way the shorter cried out. Laurel gave a sharp moan as she finally hit orgasm, grinding down on Jon's tongue as her throat vibrated around him making him whine sweetly. It was only a matter of seconds before he came as well from all of the attention he was receiving, arching his back and moaning louder. THe girl was more than happy to swallow as she rode out her own climax, giving a soft content hum before pulling off and quickly off of Jon's face as well.

Now unmuffled, Jon was nearly screaming as he was pounded, spreading his legs more and whining. Laurel gave a soft sigh as she stared at him before taking her shirt off and getting her bra off as well, tossing them both aside. "Eddie, you've got condoms yeah?" She asked, her usually sweet tone only slightly wavered, clearly wanting to be fast about this. THough Eduardo seemed incredibly focused on the tight heat squeezing around his thick cock, holding Jon's hips tight and listening to him whining and moaning.

"Yeah, t... top drawer" He mumbled under his breath with a little nod and didn't even look at her. He was getting close and felt like he desperately needed to pump his seed into blond beneath him.

Laurel nodded and leaned back to open it up, smiling when she found one and giving a triumphant sort of "Ha!" Shutting the drawer behind herself.

She tore the packaging open and had Eduardo lean back a bit so she could roll it over Jon's dick, the boy's eyes widening a bit as he realized what she was doing and quickly stilled completely, clearly kind of excited. Using her hands to guide it inside of her she lined it up with her entrance and slowly sank down on it, a little moan managing to slip past her lips as she did.

Eduardo couldn't bring himself to completely stop, but slowed down a good bit to make it a little easier. He quickly picked up the pace though once she started moving, and Laurel tried to have the same rhythm as him while she bounced but that was actually pretty difficult and she couldn't totally keep up.

Regardless Jon was practically in heaven, screaming and moaning his lover's names, begging them not to stop and trying to buck his own hips occasionally. He was harshly grabbed by the hips and held still as Edu came deep inside of him, huffing and losing his pace slightly. He buried his face in Laurel's neck as he panted, the girl bringing a hand back to rub the back of his head as she leaned into him.

"You love that, don'cha baby?~" she smirked as she looked down at Jon, still moving her hips "When Eddie fills you like that, I can tell you do" she laughed, it was bubbly but very harsh and blunt, ending with a moan being caught in her throat. One of Eduardo's hands had come to rub her clit while she rode and he started to pick up the pace again, and she seemed overjoyed. "Y... You just love when he shows you who you belong to, filthy little whore~"

There was no warning when Jon came, again, he simply couldn't help himself anymore, it was too fantastic. He arched his back as he filled the condom, throwing his head back and moaning out for Laurel, who just smirked wider and stopped bouncing. As she carefully got up Eduardo pulled out, he also got the condom off Jon and tossed it in the trash. The sub just laid there panting softly and looking at the ceiling, clearly trying to recollect himself.

He was a little surprised when Laurel hugged him but laughed as he was squeezed tight, smiling and wrapping his arms around her as well. "You did so amazing Jon" she spoke pretty softly and gave him a kiss on the forehead as he blushed and smiled more. They were both grabbed and pulled to lay where the pillows actually were by Eduardo, who also covered them all up and wrapped his arms around, the two happily snuggling up with him.

The woman gently ran her fingers through Jon's hair, and gave him a few more kisses, asking if he was ok to go to sleep. Even in her drunken and exhausted state, it was baked into her that at least a little aftercare was definitely necessary. Jon appreciated it, but said he was more tired than anything and just wanted to go to bed, so that's what they did.

#sinsworld #sw eduardo #sw jon #sw laurel #sw jaurel #sw laurduardo #sw jonuardo

[iavulture]

It might seem crazy what I'm 'bout to say, but...

Recently I brought up two thoughts about Despicable Me 4 with a friend of mine over on Discord, specifically about Gru Jr. In fact, I've been thinking about it for a few days now, but it does tie into an idea I've been obsessed with to the point that I wrote a fanfic related to it.

… Namely, that Gru's son will be someone special, and that he probably will be an AVL agent when he grows up. Probably in a hypothetical sequel/spin-off series that I personally like to call "Agent Gru" (creative, I know, but just stick w/ me).

Now I know that the movie hasn't been out yet, and that this post could possibly be rendered moot in the future, but why don't we indulge in some speculation, shall we?

Thought #1:

Okay, this is more of an observation than anything, but I found it interesting that Gru Jr. has blue eyes and red hair, just like his father and mother respectively. I've done a bit of digging, and I found out that blue eyes + red hair is apparently a very rare combination of eye color + hair color traits. According to this article, about 0.17% of the human population has this combination, making Jr. unique in that regard.

(I even joked that the powers that be in the Despicable Me/Minions universe saw Gru's family and, after Gru and Lucy did it, really said: "You shall be blessed with a son, and so you shall have children with all of the natural hair colors." Additionally, the powers that be also decided that said son should win the genetics lottery and gave him a rare combination of traits. Which leads me to a question: if red hair is a recessive trait, what part of Gru's side of the family had red hair that led him to be a carrier of that recessive gene? I'm probably just overthinking it, but it's something interesting to think about, y'know?)

Ofc, there's also the possibility that the hair color/eye color might change as he grows up, but I digress.

tl;dr Gru's son is special because of his unique combination of phenotypes.

Which sort of leads into…

Thought #2:

Okay, here's the real meat of my crazy idea/speculation, and it starts with an observation of two characters from DM1 and DM2.

Remember Vector? (DM1)

Or Antonio? (DM2)

You notice any similarities between these two?

If not, I'll say it.

Vector is the biological son of Mr. Perkins.

And Antonio is the biological son of Eduardo Perez aka El Macho.

And bc Rule of Three seems to be in order, Gru Jr. is the biological son of Gru, thus three supervillains (well, more like two villainous characters and one who turned good anyway) are fathers with biological sons.

But wait! That's not the most interesting observation that I have about them. It's actually…

… Where the sons fall on the morality scale, though it's currently debatable where Jr. will lie. So get this.

Vector is a full-on villain, as he's the main antagonist of DM1

I see Antonio as the "neutral" son, bc he's not exactly villainous like his dad; the worst he does is break Margo's heart in DM2, but otherwise he's kinda a normal kid

Which leads me to this idea: what if Gru Jr. is the "good" son of the trio? Like…

I can't see him becoming a villain like his dad once was (remember that Gru stole things in order to try and impress his neglectful mother!), and seeing how he acts around Lucy and how she seems to handle the kids (she's better than Marlena ofc), I kinda see him as a bit of a momma's boy rather than someone with mommy issues like his dad once did. Overall, he's born into a loving family whose members care for each other very much to where the only realistic reason as to why he would become bad is through a bad outside influence.

At the bare minimum, he'll grow up to be an ordinary guy w/ an ordinary life, but I honestly can't see that bc 1) his family circumstances don't exactly add up to an ordinary life (his parents are AVL agents for one thing) and 2) unless Illumination gets tired of the DM/Minions 'verse, I can't see them settling on an ordinary character as a protagonist. I mean, can you imagine if Jr. was the head of a jelly/jam business just like what Gru was trying to do at the start of DM2?

In other words, I don't really believe he'll be a villain or an ordinary guy. Like, there's little to nothing that could possibly lead him to either of those paths, unless something drastic happens in 4 or in another movie that has him. I think it's more likely he'll be actively on the side of good and be smth like an AVL agent like his parents. Plus, and I know this might be a bit harsh in regards to the girls, but I can (realistically) see him being the next-gen main character of the series. At the same time, though, I do hope that he gets to interact w/ his older sisters in DM4 and beyond (whatever that'll be like); hell, in the fic that I mentioned at the beginning of this post, I imagined him and Edith to be in the AVL, with Edith being like a weapons/gadget specialist like Q from James Bond with an additional enthusiasm for fighting (and I also imply that she might've taught him a few things along the way, such as fighting skills).

Oh, and one last thing: considering that Jr. has a scarf like his protagonist parents (I don't count minor characters w/ scarves like Antonio here), it's likely that he will be a protagonist in DM4 and possibly even future movies after it. (Apparently having one automatically gives you a high chance to be a protag in this 'verse? I joke, but y'know…)

So… yeah. Sorry for the long post, but I just had to get this off my chest since it's been nagging me for a little while now.

#despicable me #despicable me 4 #theory #long post #gru jr

[greensagephase]

Alondra I just read part 13 and I'm screaming!

Life have been very hectic for me lately as I started my new masters, and I needed the time to sit down and properly read the thing that I know now that is my favourite thing to wait for

Its currently 3am, I'm sleepless just like Miguel, chronically staring at my screens as I go through coding and other complex stuff (fr my O'hara era) but I needed comfort and I was like you know what? F this, I'm reading NVC, idk I was gonna stay up late anyways.

After all my rant here are my thoughts, in order probably of how I felt about the fic:

-First of all the SCARF are you kidding me?!? The fact that Miggy keeps it for comfort and reader knows and decides to trick him out on wearing it so her scent lingers on it, fixing it around her aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaghhhhhhhhhh i mean come onnnnnnnnnnn kiss already

-And then Miguel just casually putting the scarf on her cause whatever YOLO just do it, my heart exploded

-AND LORD HAVE MERCY SEND HELP I'M GOING CRAZY ABOUT WEARING MIGUEL'S JACKET

-istg I felt it around me, like a thousand sizes bigger than me, being cozy like a blanket? My heart aches!

-Miguel telling reader to be careful and then she sayind "I'll see you at home" I literally had to bite my arm not to scream and wake up my roomates LOL

-This part got me sooooo longing, cause this is istg my brother and I dynamic with my mom and grandma, is latino coded that I love it, it filled my heart to remember those days.

-AND ALSO HELLO NOT YOU REFERRING EDUARDO YAÑEZ LOOKING LIKE MIGUEL IM HISTERICALLY LAUGHING OMGGGGGGGGG (gotta say destilando amor is an amazing novela lol)

-I can't… are we saying we have a crush on him? Cause… sighs I do.. I long for him -I'm sorry I'm making this notes as I go and I'm ranting but this..

-Miguel… you can hug me any day baby you don't need to stuff a pillow.

-The blanket, the canelita, the talk in the couch… the yearning for physical touch, the new playfulness of Miguel… I was in tears for at least 20 min before I could continue reading.

-Little side note on this… phrase… my mind started to go places where it didn't need to be about my theories on spiderverse lol,please SONY IM BEGGING, I need for 2025 to come asap, I need answers and more Miggy.

-Anyways know that I'm writing this as a live reaction and I just stood up from my chair to go scream at mi pillow when I saw the word

GARIBALDIS, you finally did it I love so much MY HEARTTT IS GONNA EXPLODE!

You have no idea how happy this just made me! AAAAH!

-And in this angsty part… OMG… I swear I needed like 20 more minutes to recollect myself...meanwhile I'll give you this gaby doodle

-Okay add like another 20 minutes after you mentioned that Gaby sang Luna de Xelajú on the guitar, this whole Gabriella convo has my heart aching more, I need this little girl in my life...

-Not Miguel telling reader about his dreams of her interacting with Gabi and Gabriel, I'm on the floor once again, and telling her that they love her and she admitting she loves them too

-So for the next part when reader and Miguel hold hands while sleeping… I'll just share my doodle with you.... I went insane...

-The image of this alone will have me dreaming all night of him i swear, this became to much for my heart to quickly, I can freaking assure you that this is the best piece of FF reading of my life I'm not even kidding, I'll hold your hand as miguel did 🥺

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST

OMG WE ARE OFFICIALLY BEST FRIENDS THIS IS NOT A DRILL PEOPLE

I had to doodle them both, cause hello they for sure were so cute admitting it to each other, and Miguel laughing... AAAAAAAAH!

My friend you ended up killing me with the Chilaquiles part AND YOU MENTIONING IT WAS FOR ME AND THE GARIBALDIS TOO?!?!

ISTG I LOVE YOU, it means a lot to me 😭😭😭😭😭😭

I want Miguel to cook me some spicy chilaquiles!!!! awww! this was just perfect I swear!!

Well my rant ends up here, I'm so sorry it has taken me so long to get to you, but life has been chaotic! I'm so glad I took my proper time to read and enjoy this because I felt so many things reading this chapter, it was amazing as always and can't wait for what's next!!

Sending you pinky finger hugs!

Hola, Ana!! I'm so happy you got to read part 13 despite now busy you are!! Congrats on starting your new masters!!!!!!!!! 🥳🥳🥳 I'm so proud of you!!!! Also, I'm screaming about you being in your O'Hara era, haha!! You're truly embodying him with all the screens and staying up!! But in all seriousness, I hope you're doing well and taking some well deserved time off, at least a few minutes for your mental health :)

Also, I loved reading all your reactions as you were reading the part, haha (I hope you didn't wake up your roommates)!! But now, time for me to rant about this chapter, too, because it's been one of my favorite to write so far!!

The scarf moment - the way reader tricked Miguel so she could wear it and keep her scent on it, him placing it on her the next time!! He was bold for that and playful which skjksjh, I love this side of him !! But | agree, need them to kiss already !!!! (currently fighting thoughts on them kissing and doing more 🫣🫣 the thoughts are just too much)

Reader WEARING MIGUEL'S JACKET, I'M SO GLAD YOU MENTION IT BECAUSE I WAS SCREAMING ABOUT IT AND MIGUEL'S REACTION - mans brain was buffering 💀 but also imagine wearing his jacket?? I need it 😮‍💨 imagine how comforting it would feel? And his SCENT (I'm normal about this, I promise)

sjshJSsk reader telling Miguel, " I'll see you at home" - just me being silly, and giving you guys and myself a little taste of the future 😌 (once again, the thoughts are consuming me)

Okay for the telenovela part, I was like gotta include this because this was also an evening thing for my siblings and me with my parents. I also love thinking about Miguel having these Latin experiences, so I was like imagine Miguel and Gabriel sitting at the dining table doing homework while Conchata watches the telenovela? Plus, it gave me an excuse to include Gabriel because I seriously love him so much!! So, I'm so happy that this little scene allowed you to reminisce on your childhood!! 🥺

ANA I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD MENTION THE EDUARDO YAÑEZ REFERENCE - THANK YOU!!! I had to after seeing people on tiktok saying Miguel kinda looked like him months ago lol and well, me personally, I had the biggest crush on him growing up 🤭 (and real! Destilando Amor is one of my favorite telenovelas !!)

About reader maybe having a crush on him because she realizes she's found someone like Peter in Miguel....um, no comment. But I definitely have a crush on him (I love him)!!!

And Miguel stuffing a pillow into reader's sweatshirt - SAME!! I'm like, just come and hug me, Miguel, no need for the pillow (imagining things right now)

The whole moment with the blanket and canelita to have this talk about Miguel's past - I wanted the moment to be as comforting as possible for Miguel with how heavy and sad the talk was going to be. 😭 And then, both of them yearning for physical contact (because Miguel is definitely yearning for it, if it's not clear!!) I just really loved it because now we have not only reader but also Miguel wanting more physical touch!!! I can't wait for them to finally hug fr!!!

Ana, I would love to know about your theories regarding the multiverse and universes collapsing because it's something I've been thinking about. I literally think about it and then just stop because I feel like I'm losing my mind over it. I NEED ANSWERS!! And more Miggy content, too 😭😭

THE GABY DOODLE HAS KILLED ME - SHES SO CUTE!!! LOOK AT HER CHEEKY SMILE - THE WAY I WOULD'VE CRIED IF I SAW THAT PIC LIVE WITH MIGUEL !!! The Luna de Xelajú mention with Gaby - I hurt myself with that one ngl and I feel you!! I know Gaby has little screen time in the movie but I just love her so much and I wish we had more content of her and Miggy (Sony I'm begging for more content of them happy plssss)!! But no, seriously, I would love to have her in my life and look after her (I would even raise her, let's be real) She's such an angel 🥺🥺

The part with Miguel telling reader about his dreams and her being part of them, and how she interacts with Gaby and Gabriel and how they love her !! And then you also have reader revealing that she loves them, too - AHHH!!! It's like, you guys should marry already pls (Gaby and Gabriel are probably watching from somewhere like, "éstos dos..." 🫠 Gabriel probably tells Gaby that, "Your dad has one of the brightest minds of all time, but he's never been good at this romance thing. So, I guess we need to give him time.")

OK OK OK OK YOUR DOODLE OF MIGUEL SLEEPING AND HOLDING HANDS WITH READER AHHHHH!!!!

He looks so dreamy and cute 🥺🥺🥺 I love it so much I'm just staring at my screen (again) with heart eyes!!!! Thank you Ana ❤️❤️❤️ I'm so happy you liked this moment because I was screaming and ventilating the whole time while writing it!!!!!

AND YES, IT'S HAPPENING, WE OFFICIALLY HAVE THE BEST FRIEND TITLE (almost 200k words later) BUT WE GOT HERE!!!! And we had some hand holding action (I've been waiting for this for months ngl!!!) I'm so proud of them finally admitting it!!!

MIGGY AND YOU, ANA -IM- THEY'RE SO CUTE AND MIGGY LAUGHING 🥺😭I LOVE THIS!!! You guys look so cute!!! I hope you draw your spidersona with Miggy more because they just look so cute together!!!!!! (when do we get a spidersona reveal fr?) BUT SERIOUSLY LOOK AT MIGGY !!! NEED THIS MAN TO SMILE AND LAUGH

Omg and the food and mention- I told you I was going to add the garibaldis and chilaquiles!! I was planning on including them in part 12 but then the flow of the chapter changed, so I decided to leave it for part 13!! I'm glad it made you happy!!! I thought it would be nice since you've told me you love both things (and I also love chilaquiles with all my heart), so I'm happy you loved it!!!! And girl, me, too!!! I want to sit down and drink coffee with Miguel and eat pan dulce, and then have him cook spicy chilaquiles - PLSSS !!!

I'm so so happy you enjoyed this chapter, friend!! I enjoyed reading your live reactions to it hehe, it made my heart explode with happiness!! And please don't apologize, I understand completely about being busy!! I hope school, work, and life in general is going smoothly for you!! I'm rooting for you and again, CONGRATS ON STARTING YOUR NEW MASTERS!!! I'm so, so proud of you 🥹

ALSO NOT YOU SIGNING OFF WITH PINKY FINGER HUGS !!!! AHHHHH I LOVE THAT AND YOU!!! THANK YOU FRIEND!!!!💖💖

Sending you pinky finger hugs back!!! <333

#non violent communication fan art #miguel o'hara #nonviolent communication #miguel ohara #nonviolent communication fanart #asked and answered #the doodle of Gaby - my heart is still hurting from that but in a good way!!! #Thank you for the support Ana ❤️

[bonkwosher]

Drunk Poly!Lacho x Reader Headcanons

A/N: I did this for Benoit Blanc (link here) & everyone loved it so I thought this would be fun.

Contains: Alcohol/Drinking (Ofc)

Pairing(s): Eduardo "Lalo" Salamanca x Reader x Ignacio "Nacho" Varga

Starting with light drunk:

If you're going to see one of them drunk it's definitely Lalo, Nacho will drink but not too often. Nacho is a simple beer man while Lalo is a little picky with flavors (As seen with the very berry vitamin stuff with Hector lmao). Lalo keeps a little Alcohol cabinet in the kitchen & seems like the kind of guy to "pair" alcohol with foods to make them taste better.

Lalo, when buzzed, gets all giddy. It's like he's high. Everything is funny to the man & he laughs so loud. Nacho, on the other hand, gets really talkative. Lalo will tease him for talking & say he should drink more.

"Ignacioooooo."

"Yes, Lalo?"

"Hi," Lalo chuckled.

"That's all you had to say? Usually, you're the one rambling on & on but I've said more words than you."

"Are you counting words, Ignacio?" You ask teasingly. "Oh shut up, Y/N." Lalo broke out into a fit of laughter, Nacho yelling, "THAT WASNT EVEN FUNNY," only makes tears stream down Lalo's face as he laughs harder.

Shitfaced gay cartel boys:

Lalo is the loudest, touchiest drunk ever. On top of that, he literally cannot walk, it is hilarious. He'll lean on you or Nacho if you guys aren't as drunk & if he tries to walk he will fall. If you guys are sober you try to help him but if you guys are drunk you just laugh your heads off.

The only downside about Lalo being drunk is his impulsivity is amplified by 1000%. If someone messes with you or god forbid flirts with you, that guys is going home with a broken nose or not at all.

Nacho is usually the designated driver, sitting quietly at the bar with a club soda & chuckling at your & Lalo's drunk antics. People often say being the one sober person isn't fun but Nacho finds it fun most of the time. Carrying around his tough guy boyfriend who has essentially become a baby & you bringing him out to dance like idiots on the dance floor.

Now how is Nacho when he does get shitfaced (This is a tough one for me). I think shitfaced Nacho is a wild card. Like he'd be the one to jump on the tables & start dancing, climb a tree & act like a spy, or run across the street with oncoming traffic. Maybe he avoids getting shitfaced because of how he is when he is drunk. But when you guys are home alone in your huge walled yard, Lalo may just get him absolutely drunk to see his craziness. It's an aspect that makes him love Nacho more.

"Y/N, I need help! I got Ignacio drunk & now he's on the roof!" Lalo yelled from outside. "I CAN FLY!" Nacho screamed, clearly getting ready to jump. "NO, NO PUEDES MI CORAZÓN! (NO YOU CAN'T MY HEART)"

Bonus:

If you somehow end up involved in the cartel side of their lives or the cartel finds out about you, you are definitely going to at least one of Don Eladio's parties. You'll see something in your boys that you rarely, if ever, see. Fear. They pretend to be buzzed, not drinking a lick of alcohol.

Don't worry though, with or without alcohol in his system Lalo will beat the shit out of any partygoer that so much as looks at you the wrong way. Nacho will definitely be following closely behind him at all moments to stop him from doing anything irrational.

Lalo walked off towards the house looking particularly angry. Nacho jumped in front of him, "Woah, where are you going?" Lalo sighed & lowered his voice to a whisper, "The bathroom, Ignacio, I just hate this party."

#lalo x reader #lalo #lalo salamanca #lalo salamanca x reader #salamanca #nacho varga x reader #nacho varga #ignacio varga x reader #ignacio varga #better call saul #breaking bad #polyamory #poly #polyamarous #gay #lgbt #lgbtq #bcs #brba #silly little gay drug lord

[maddiehu7]

Do I wanna know? | lalo Salamanca |

Chapter 1

I wake up to my alarm clock ringing

"Ugh" I groan reaching over and hitting it off my side table silencing it, time to get up I guess I rise groggily from my bed going over to the kitchen grabbing a water from the fridge chugging go it I walk over to my window pulling the curtain back a little looking outside

"Another glorious morning" I sigh to myself I've been a little...on edge lately with the whole looking for my dad thing but I'm powering through it, I walk over to my closet picking out an outfit for this hot summer weather I decide on blue jean shorts with a see through black long sleeve and a black tube top underneath and of course my signature black heeled boots

I look in mirror adjusting my top

"Not bad" I say looking at the outfit I created, I don't eat breakfast makes me nauseous so instead I pull out the files I have so far on my dad I have a couple friends in the police department so I've managed to gather quite a bit being here these past few weeks

"Mike Ehrmantraut" I whisper looking at his picture I can't believe I finally know who my father is I thought it'd feel great but...something feels wrong...off and I can't put my finger on it as I look at the picture longer I decide todays the day I take action I've been sitting on this information for a while to...scared to do anything about it but fuck it what do I have to be ashamed of he's the one who gave up his kid, I close the file putting it away grabbing my gun hiding it in my jean shorts flipping my shirt over it

"Here goes nothing" I say taking a deep breath heading out the door.

I pull up to a brown house with white on top it's nice I think, I put my car in park I don't even know what I'm gonna do now that I'm here I have a urge to run...hide but I take a deep breath ignoring it squeezing the wheel

"I can't do this" I run my hands through my hair going to pull away when a hand slams on my window I jump looking out to see my dad

"Shit" I sigh rolling down the window

"Who are you and why are you sitting outside my house" he says harshly

"Um sorry I thought this was someone else's house" I say acting more nervous than I am in hopes he believes me and lets me go

"You didn't answer me who are you" he says putting his hand on my window I quickly think of a fake name which is easy scince I always make them up being a bounty hunter

"Elena smith nice to meet you...?" I look at him questioningly pretending to not know his name he looks at me for a minute before heading back into his house I sigh loudly thank god I got out of that I think to myself putting the car in drive I just want to distract myself from this new awful feeling that I can't describe so I decide to eat my feelings and head to los pollos hermanos to try it out.

I walk in smelling the grease of delicious fried food and inhale smiling I look around at all the people when two men stand out to me one is shorter with a bald head an a blank look on his face the other one has black hair with a grey streak running through it and a handsome face with chocolate brown eyes I stare at him a little longer than normal thinking how hot he is I think he sensing someone looking at him as he looks around with a questioningly look on his face when he spots me he looks into my eyes trying to read me I quickly look away after being caught i still feel his eyes following me when I go up to the counter to order food I order a number 9 and bring it to a table across from that guy to eat i try the chicken and it's not bad which is nice sense it's cheap and close to me I'm enjoying my food when the guy from earlier slides into my booth I look up surprised sitting up straighter

"Hello" he says smiling

"Um hi" I say back awkwardly

"Oh sorry I'm Eduardo Salamanca but you can call me Lalo" he says reaching his hand out grabbing a fry from my plate popping it into his mouth looking at me

"Oh we'll help yourself Eduardo" I say pushing my plate forward rolling my eyes at him

"Your funny" he laughs sitting back his knees brushing against mine under the table I back up a little looking at him suspiciously, a guy comes over smiling at us

"Is everything to your liking" he asks folding his hands behind him Lalo perks up turning towards the man

"Are you kidding me, this is the best chicken I've ever had" he says smiling brightly

"I'm delighted to hear that" the man I'm assuming owns the place says laughing but it feels fake

"No really I'm serious it's crispy but not dried out and the seasoning it's so...flavorful!" he says overdramatized

"Well thank you, is there anything else I can do for you?" He questions there's something off about him I think to myself

"Is there any chance and I know the answers probably no...but is it possible to meet the owner" he says looking towards the counter for a second

"I am the owner" the man says calmly

"Really! How lucky for me" he says but I think he already knew who he was so why ask?

"Would you be interested in franchising because I'm eager to invest" he says like he's in a really bad play

"Well perhaps we should go to my office where we can discuss it further" the owner says

"Excellent, see you later princessa" he gets up to follow the owner winking at me

"Don't call me that" I yell after him to which he laughs, what the f just happened I think when the other man with Lalo slides into my booth

"Oh great another one" I say flopping my arms up towards him

"Who are you" he demands

"Nice to meet you to" I roll my eyes at him he just gets more angry

"Answer me" he says flashing his gun in his pants on purpose to scare me

"Oh the big guns literally" I say laughing he just looks confused that his intimidation tactic didn't work

"Look I don't know what you and your friend are involved in but leave me out of it ok" I say getting up from the booth walking away but he grabs my arm I turn around and he look me in the eyes seriously

"Stay away from Lalo Salamanca" he says letting my arm go

"No problem dude" I say putting my hands up walking away I walk outside still feeling eyes on me but I get in my car and drive around the block a couple times to make sure no one sees that I live right across the street, after a couple rounds I drive into my apartment parking lot

"What a day" I sigh out exhausted turning the car off getting out when all of a sudden I get pushed against the car hard I hit my head on the top of the car window stumbling I reach for my gun but someone grabs it first

"Fuck" I grumble when eveything goes black something being put over my head

(To be continued, let me know what you think of this new story! )

#fanfic #wattpad #writers on tumblr #smut #fluff #lalo salamanca #lalo salamanca imagine #lalo salamanca x reader #better call saul #nacho varga #gus fring #los pollos hermanos

[blairwritingscript]

"Partners in Crime p3"

WORD COUNT: 1.6K

PAIRINGS: Venom/Eddie x Reader

SUMMARY: It all comes down to you being a very nonchalant bounty hunter desperate for a vacation or distraction, you got what you asked for and found... a partner?

WARNINGS: Mentions of fighting. little cursing. little alcohol. some head biting <3

A/N: B/N = bounty's name imma leave the name to your imagination. y/n/n = your nick name. Venom's text is written like this :)

Also I DO take requests.

* Part 1 * Part 2 * Part 3

♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:♪:;;;:

Another day had gone by, You and Eddie were almost creating a morning routine. Earlier today thought you had found a lead so you and venom went out to check but it was false. It turned out to be some other gang member that had nothing to do with B/N.

You were disappointed and you wanted to go back home, but Venom had other plans and wanted to do something about your bad lead. He ATE him. You were startled at first, but it was not like Venom would have done that to you.. right? You didn't care about it since you had now created a bond with him, that and you really didn't want to know the answer.

You sighed, laying on the couch with your laptop on your stomach. It was rainy today so that automatically made everything seem more boring.

"Eddie" You called out.

Eddie looked up from his spot on the bed, his phone on the charger for having used it so much yesterday. "What's up?"

You sat up a bit "wanna watch a movie?"

Venom popped out immediately "YES, I HAVE BEEN DOING NOTHING FOR HOURS"

"I'll check the pantry for snacks, You choose the movie" You jumped up excitedly.

"Whatever you say, y/n/n" He said. You laughed softly. You had called him Eduardo 1 time, and now he calls you that. You didn't hate it. You actually liked being called that by him, It made you feel cool. He got up and sat down on the couch instead, turning Netflix on.

"okay, all set and done" He said with a grind on his mischievous face. You eyed him up and down, Your hands full with bags of chips and soda.

You jokingly slowly stepped towards Eddie, your eyes going to the title Spread across the tv screen.

You wanted to facepalm "really?" You dropped the snacks on the table.

"What? I thought you would like horror" His grin got wider.

"Don't get me wrong, I love horror. But did you really have to pick SCARY MOVIE?" You yell dramaticly as you point to it.

"you told me i could choose, so you'll have to watch it"

you tried to hide your smile and sad down next to him.

Eddie started the movie and grabbed one of the chips, placing it between the two of you. two became three when Venom appeared again. Eddie was glad that Venom's nagging in his head had stopped. NOPE, instead of just floating or whatever he wrapped a tendril around your waist and pulled you closer to Eddie.

You let out a gasp, Not expecting a bloody tendril to come out of your current roomie. Eddie stiffened. You felt that and decided to tease him by just getting comfortable against his side and holding softly onto his arm. Venom had moved to sit in between your neck and shoulder, Nuzzling himself into you.

This was weird yet also nice? it was new and you wouldn't change it for the world. You didn't want it to end, but you were still on a mission and were scared that if you had completed it that both of them would leave you all alone again. You shook off that negative thought and went back to watching the movie.

Eddie was still a bit stiffened up. You were so close, He could smell the fragrance of your shampoo lingering in your hair. You were warm too and the way you clung onto his arm made him all fuzzy on the inside.

Eddie had fallen asleep at some point during the movie and so had Venom. They were both basicly wrapped around you like you were some kind of plushie.

In the corner of your eye you saw your phone light up, You reached out and read the notification. This time you were sure it was b/n. You turned your head towards Eddie. You couldn't risk it so you carefully moved out of their grasp.

You put on some proper clothes and grabbed any equipment with you that you thought you would need. You got to the door and looked back them one last time. You would've left a note but you didn't want them to follow, so you just left.

It wasn't completely dark yet, You were trying to act normal as you went through the streets . You checked your phone to see if you were still going the right way, which you were.

You kept going until you arrived at your location. An alleyway. why did it always have to be either an alleyway or a warehouse. People can't be original these days. There was a singular door with a light above it. A faint talking could be heard from the other side, not much, but just enough for you to hear some familiar words about drugs you were all to interested in.

some minutes earlier.

The sound of a door closing woke the symbiote up. He looked around only to be met with no one at his side besides Eddie. He looked around your place and even knocked on the bathroom. There was no reaction whatsoever and he got worried. He knew that you were tough but he couldn't help the feeling that you could be in danger.

"Eddie, Wake up" Eddie groaned and opened his eyes. He looked at venom and the at.. you?

"Where is y/n?" He was fully awake in an instance.

"She has left us, Eddie. I do not not where to" Eddie looked at the tv. The movie was still playing so she couldn't have left long ago. Then he noticed her laptop was still turned on. He was certain that you would't leave without it. He hesitated but he really needed to know where you could've gone, he took it and found the message.

"She got him" He said "She has a location"

Venom didn't understand why you hadn't told them. He took control over Eddie's body and rushed to the window, Braking it open and jumping out. Eddie told him where you should be and the both of them went faster then they have ever gone to get to you.

You took out your gun, hand reaching for the handle of the door before pulling it open in a haste. You were met with maybe 10 to 15 people waiting for you. were they expecting you? You weren't sure but you knew that in the next moments you had to fight.

Venom quickly arrived at the spot, He saw an open door and loud noises coming from the dark doorway. He was already on his way but then he heard gunshots. Eddie was yelling inside of Venom to hurry up. He got in and was glad when he saw you being busy with other rookies. there were a few of them on the ground, not dead yet also not quite alive enough to move freely. The shooting had most likely come from your side.

Venom grabbed and punched some out of the way. The rookies whining and grunting when they were met with either the wall or venom's claws. You by now had noticed the big guy and hurried over to stand back to back with him.There still about five left.

"Why did you go alone, y/n?!" He almost sounded hurt. It made you feel bad and guilty, two feeling you weren't used to.

"I didn't want to pull you into this mess anymore!" You yelled, punching some of them off of you as they tried to cut you with their fucking daggers.

"It was our agreement, we don't go back on those" Venom yelled right back at you. "Besides you're a fragile human, you are our's!"

"I am not fragile, i have dealt with shit much worse than this!" that is where your mind went instead of processing the fact that he called you theirs. Venom was about to take out the last. You had to stop him since the actual fragile human who he held as a doll in his hand was your bounty.

"V, WAIT!" you smacked his arm "i need that one!" You grabbed your handcuffs and when venom let him back on the ground, still holding him in place for you, you cuffed him.

"finally, do you have any idea how much trouble and time i went through to get your ass" you scolded at b/n. Venom looked at you in aw as you were traumatizing the piece of shit.

You looked around you, there were a lot of people. they weren't of any importance of you so you took the only one you got payed for outside. Venom behind you.

After you had brought in your bounty you got your check. venom soon took you with him to the top of some building, Letting Eddie take over. Both sitting o the edge.

"So.." He started.

"So?" you smirked, leaning back on the palms of your hands as you take in the view of San Francisco.

"Are you gonna go now?" Eddie continued softly.

"I'm not sure, i mean.. there's already another bounty for me somewhere else" You spoke as quietly as him.

"can't we come with you, y/n?" he looked at you, trying to win you over.

You took a deep breath, sitting upright "and then what? become partners in crime or something?" You laughed sadly.

"Eddie, i'm gonna need you to kiss her" Venom told him forcefully in his head.

Eddie chuckled "how about just partners?" this time looking in your eyes.

You blushed but you didn't dare to answer that.

He moved closer, cupping your cheek with one hand as the other was placed gently on your hand. When he leaned in you moved away a little just before his lips reached yours "Are you sure you want to be with me?"

"are you sure you want to be with me, you mean?" he joked. You nodded. You now leaned in and your lips met in a soft but all meaningful kiss.

Venom got jealous and got out "and me?".

"Yes and you Venom" You smiled and cradled his face, kissing his forehead lovingly.

#Venom x reader #Venom x you #venom #venom: let there be carnage #eddie brock x reader #Symbrock #veddie #Avengers x you #marvel fic

[girlbloggerbae13]

Princesa Salamanca

Synopsis: Set after Hector Salamanca's collapse (thank you for that Nacho!), this story follows a young woman, Sarah Jackson, or now, Sarah Salamanca, the first female Salamanca by marriage to our dear and beloved Lalo. She heads to ABQ a few weeks before him with the twins to keep an eye on the family business and our previously mentioned Ignacio Varga, a task from her lovely Eduardo. She turns heads everywhere she goes, especially being an innocent looking token gringa, and has tricks up her sleeve. Being Lalo's girl, she is quite a firecracker. Readers will slowly learn her tragic backstory (tw: drug abuse, SA, prostitution) and how she became to be the princess of the Salamanca family. Not only that, but her relationship with Lalo, Nacho, and many of our other BCS favorites will be explored.

A/N: I'm really proud of this story! I've been in love with Tony Dalton since Hawkeye, but he's such a charming devil as Lalo! This was really thought out as I watched Better Call Saul, so it might be confusing. There was no proofreading, and I can't promise that I'll follow a strict schedule with posting, but I do hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think! I'll also probably end up posting on AO3.

Chapter 1:

“You’ll go with Leo and Marco to Albuquerque, and I’ll be there in just a few weeks, okay?”

Sarah frowned as she laid in her and Lalo’s bed, crossing her arms. Her husband, Eduardo “Lalo” Salamanca, was the unexpected love of her life. She never went anywhere without him. Don’t get her wrong, she loved Lalo’s twin cousins; they were good boys, great even, but she had been by Lalo’s side since they met at her old employer’s house.

Once upon a time, Sarah was a happy UCLA education student, and after that, a mother, and then a first grade teacher. Until her son got sick and her boyfriend left. A hopeful diagnosis turned to turmoil, and in desperation, Sarah resorted to what she previously considered a dirty career: stripping. Stripping led to drugs, and drugs led to connections. Connections led to her leaving her stripping career to pursue an “entertainment career” with a man named Tuco Salamanca.

That name, Salamanca. When she followed Tuco and his job offer to his home in Mexico, she had no idea she was getting involved with one of the most powerful families in the drug business. If it weren’t for Lalo, she would still be there, working 30 hours at a time, living off of rice and cocaine, and getting beat up both physically and mentally by all of her customers. She owes him her life.

However, none of that would have happened if her son had gotten out of remission and by some miracle, lived. But that was then, and this is now. There’s not a day that goes by without her thinking of her little Sam and what could have been.

Sarah’s thoughts were interrupted by Lalo climbing into bed beside her. “Aw, princesa, are you gonna miss me?” He asked, smirking. He ran a hand over her arm and pulled her close.

“You promise you’ll be there soon?” She whispered.

“Pinky.” He stuck out his pinky finger and locked it with hers. “Besides, you know the twins love you. They’re like your number one fans! Come on kid, it won’t be so bad.”

She rolled off of him and over to her side, facing the other wall. “I suppose, but you better be quick.” Sarah sighed and dragged herself out of bed, still wearing Lalo’s boxers and floral button up from the night before, socks unevenly pulled up on her legs from all of her tossing and turning, among other things.

Lalo put his hands behind his head, linking his fingers. He watched as she moved around the room, almost tiptoeing. She was delicate, but confident. The Sarah he met wasn’t like that. She was jumpy, skittish, and afraid of her own shadow. It was pitiful, but she was all the more grateful to leave her job to come home with him. He did care for the girl, a lot more than he thought he would. At first, he just wanted to help her out, of course, and let her escape the raging hands of his cousin, Tuco. But as time went on, he was mesmerized with how she blossomed. She became less of a bird with broken wings, a malleable young girl to blow off steam with, and she started turning into a firecracker. Sarah was Lalo’s favorite thing to ever happen to him in his years in the game. She turned him soft, but he didn’t mind.

“Have you seen my black heels?”

“What do you need those heels for? You planning on seducing one of the locals down there?”

She looked at him through her reflection in the mirror above the dresser, rolling her eyes. “Lalo.”

He chuckled to himself. “Whatever, don’t help your poor girl,” she teased. “I’ll find them.” She made her way downstairs after slipping on her velvet red slippers, a gift from Lalo for learning how to drive stick-shift. He followed the young woman.

When he got downstairs, he was greeted with his cousins. “Buenos dias, primos.” They nodded in response, the typical greeting from the stoic pair. “Sarah, you’ve got to get the boys to warm up on your car ride. We can’t have them scaring the skells!”

Sarah was pouring coffee with one hand and holding a newly lit cigarette and the black heels she had apparently found in the other hand. They were likely kicked off the evening prior in the process of the couple making their way to the bedroom. “Don’t you worry Eddy,” she said with a nickname that only she could call him, “Marco and I have a lot of catching up to do.” She walked between the twins. “Word on the street is that you’ve got it bad for your gardener. Julia, is it?” She eyed him while taking a drag from the cigarette.

Marco’s twin let a slight smile escape his lips, while Marco rolled his eyes. Lalo giggled. His girl was always going to find out everything, one of her many hidden talents.

“I’ll get your bag, mi vida, but come with me real quick. I have a task for you to do for me.”

Sarah followed the older man upstairs, grabbing his hand from behind. “What is it?” She asked, with childlike curiosity, always happy to help Lalo.

In the bedroom, Lalo reached into his nightstand and pulled out a picture, handing it to her. “You know Senor Fring and his little chicken side hustle, but I need you to keep an eye on someone a little smaller. This guy, Ignacio Varga, is one of mi tio’s guys. But he give old Tio Hector some pushback before his collapse. Something about his family, his dad’s business, whatever. He’s a stubborn one, but smart. At least that’s what they say. Just, I don’t know, watch the guy, figure him out, get him to open up. You have that way about you, you know sweetheart?” Lalo tipped her chin up with his fingertips so that she was looking him in the eye. “Can you do that for me?”

She smiled softly, unconsciously batting her eyelashes and giving him the hooded eyes. “Of course.” “Good girl.” Lalo smiled back, and after tucking Varga’s picture into her bag, he took both hands to hold her face. He exhaled, then pulled her in for a kiss. When he pulled away, her lips followed him.

“Wait, wait, wait, one more for good luck,” Sarah whined, protesting as she tried to pull him back with his shirt.

“Okay c’mere.” Lalo kissed her again, slower. This time, when he pulled away, she stayed standing with her eyes closed and sighed.

“Alright, now I can go. I better see you soon.”

He walked her outside and helped her into his cousins’ car, then placed the bag in the trunk. Lalo hit the back, signaling they were good for takeoff.

“Adios princesa!” He waved goodbye, and she blew him a kiss. He pretended to catch it and bring it to his heart, then turned back to his casa grandiosa, shaking his head and smiling. That girl was going to be the death of him.

“Es vergonzoso lo mucho que se gustan,” Leo muttered to Marco.

Sarah leaned up in between the twins. “Estoy justo aquí, ¿sabes?”

#better call saul #lalo salamanca #tony dalton #lalo salamanca x reader #nacho varga x reader #salamanca twins #breaking bad #bcs #bcs fanfic #lalo salamanca fanfic #princesa salamanca #eduardo salamanca #jorge de guzman #saul goodman #jimmy mcgill #nacho varga #ignacio varga #ignacio varga x reader

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

Even with our current climate of fake news, misinformation, disinformation, and election lies, we shouldn’t use  government power to try enforcing the truth.

By: Angel Eduardo

Published: Jun 29, 2023

Lies are a problem. 

In fact, one can persuasively argue that lies are the problem. 

Few behaviors are as corrosive to our social fabric or as foundational to our societal divisions. Lies severely hobble our ability to communicate effectively, our capacity to understand reality, and our attempts at securing social and moral progress. As a result, it’s understandable to conclude that using government power to prohibit and eliminate lies is justified.

The thing is, that’s a terrible idea.

While some exceptions exist, there are good reasons why our Constitution protects most forms of dishonesty, deception, and artful deviations from the truth. In this explainer I’ll go over these reasons and outline why, for all the difficulty and damage they certainly cause, most lies are and should remain protected speech.

What exactly is a lie, anyway?

Most of us can agree that lies are the opposite of truth, but opinions vary from that point forward. 

Must lies require a conscious attempt to deceive? If the speaker believes the falsehood, are they lying regardless? Can statements once thought to be true retroactively become lies once they’re discovered to be false?

Things get weirder when you start factoring in things like fiction, satire, or parody. Are those technically “lies”? What if something is mostly true, or mostly false? At what point does a statement cross the threshold into being an official lie?

Hopefully these questions illustrate the difficulty of knowing how and where to draw these lines. Now imagine trying to legislate all this. How can you legally tell the difference between lies and honest mistakes? How much does intention play into your definition, and how can you reasonably gauge it? Perhaps most importantly: How can you ensure that whatever laws you create to stamp out lies don’t get abused or stamp out important truths along with them? 

This last question has been central to why discussions about regulating lies with laws have been so difficult, and why they’ve almost always ended by erring on the side of letting false speech stay free.

But what about lies we know are lies? Shouldn’t the government legislate against those? The Supreme Court would wrestle with this very question in a landmark 2012 case, United States v. Alvarez.

The case of stolen valor

During a meeting of the Three Valley Water District Board in Claremont, California in 2007, Xavier Alvarez stepped up to introduce himself. “I’m a retired marine of 25 years,” he said. “Back in 1987, I was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor.”

These were lies, and Alvarez was in the habit of telling them. In the past he had claimed he played hockey for the Detroit Red Wings and that he had once been married to a Mexican starlet. But by purporting to have received a military medal, Alvarez had taken his dishonesty into new and more serious territory: He had violated the Stolen Valor Act of 2005, which criminalized lying about having or receiving a military honor.

Alvarez was indicted and pleaded guilty to the charge, but appealed on the basis that the law itself was an unconstitutional, content-based restriction of his right to free speech. In other words, the statute restricted speech specifically based on what it is saying, in violation of the First Amendment. 

The Supreme Court agreed. “Absent from those few categories where the law allows content-based regulation of speech,” Justice Anthony Kennedy wrote for the majority, “is any general exception to the First Amendment for false statements.” Moreover, Justice Kennedy noted that “some false statements are inevitable if there is to be an open and vigorous expression of views in public and private conversation, expression the First Amendment seeks to guarantee.”

The Court’s analysis recognized two critical points: First, that bans on specific lies are content-based restrictions on speech. Second, that in order to preserve the freedom of expression the First Amendment defends, lies must be protected the same way as any other speech.

Lies and the First Amendment

The short answer to why lies are constitutionally protected is that, outside of a few narrow and formally recognized categories of unprotected speech, the First Amendment is neutral regarding the content of the speech it defends. This principle was expressed beautifully by Justice Thurgood Marshall in the 1972 Supreme Court case Police Department of Chicago v. Mosley, which questioned the constitutionality of a city ordinance banning non-union picketing outside of a school building. In the majority opinion, Marshall wrote, “the First Amendment means that government has no power to restrict expression because of its message, its ideas, its subject matter, or its content.”

This means that the First Amendment almost universally prohibits content-based regulation of speech. Because they target the substance of speech and are easily used to suppress disfavored ideas, content-based laws or regulations are presumed unconstitutional, and the government must meet a very heavy burden to justify them. That burden is strict scrutiny — the highest standard in First Amendment law, which requires the government to prove the regulation “furthers a compelling interest and is narrowly tailored to achieve that interest,” as outlined in Reed v. Town of Gilbert, Arizona, et al. Interests are “compelling,” the First Amendment Encyclopedia explains, when they are regarding “regulation vital to the protection of public health and safety, including the regulation of violent crime, the requirements of national security and military necessity, and respect for fundamental rights.”

The key here is that any regulations must not only advance a “compelling” interest, but must also not restrict our ability to speak freely (and dishonestly) beyond what is necessary to further that interest.

As noted above, not all expression is protected by the First Amendment: The Supreme Court has identified “historic and traditional” limitations on a few “well-defined and narrowly limited classes of speech.” These include incitement (Brandenburg v. Ohio), true threats (Virginia v. Black), and obscenity (Miller v. California).

In cases such as the United States v. Robert J. Stevens, however, the Court emphatically rejected as “startling and dangerous” the idea of a “free-floating test for First Amendment coverage” that requires speech to survive an ad hoc balancing of its costs and benefits. Rather, the “First Amendment itself reflects a judgment by the American people that the benefits of its restrictions on the Government outweigh the costs.”

Lies the First Amendment doesn’t protect — and why

When it comes to lies or dishonesty in particular, there are a few forms of it that fall under constitutionally unprotected speech, such as fraud, perjury, and defamation. Even in these cases, though, it’s not so much the lies themselves being acted against, but rather their specific and measurable consequences.

With respect to perjury, for example, false testimony in a criminal trial can lead to a wrongful conviction, affecting the life and liberty of an innocent defendant. Likewise, fraud in the form of false advertising, or other deliberate misrepresentations made for economic or personal gain, can be criminalized due to the clear material costs imposed upon those who fall prey to it.

Defamation, defined as “a false statement that harms the reputation of another,” is perhaps the most well-known of unprotected lies. It’s also very easy to understand the reasoning for it. A lot rides on reputations, and having ours smeared or destroyed can lead to real harm.

However, “harm” can also be incredibly subjective, and defamation can easily be used as a cudgel rather than a legitimate defense of one’s own honor. That’s why judges tread very carefully in defamation cases, and it’s why defamatory statements must meet a specific set of criteria to hold up in court. As Ronald K.L. Collins, David L. Hudson Jr., and FIRE Legal Director Will Creeley outline in “First Things First: A Modern Coursebook on Free Speech Fundamentals”:

A defamation plaintiff must establish all of the following six elements: 1. Identification: The publication was “of and concerning” the plaintiff. 2. Publication: The defamatory statements were disseminated to a third party. 3. Defamatory meaning: The statements in question were defamatory. 4. Falsity: The statements must be false. Truth is an absolute defense to a defamation claim. Generally, the plaintiff bears the burden of proof of establishing falsity. 5. Statement of fact: The statements in question must be objectively verifiable as false statements of fact. This means the statements were presented as true facts, but are demonstrably false. 6. Damage: The false and defamatory statements must cause actual injury or special damages.

Proving defamation can be really tough, and it gets even tougher if you’re a public figure, like a celebrity or a politician. As we covered in our explainer on the New York Times Co. v. Sullivan Supreme Court case, the limits on defamation law are meant to prevent the chilling effect caused by the use of legal action to silence criticism, satire, parody, or dissent. The bar is very high because courts are rightly afraid that general restrictions on speech, however false or unsavory, will violate not just the First Amendment but the principles of free expression that undergird it.

Other forms of unprotected lies include making false statements to government officials concerning official matters, falsely speaking on behalf of the government, and impersonating a government officer. But as with perjury, fraud, and defamation, the lies themselves aren’t the only reason for that being unprotected speech. All of these infractions focus on falsehoods that prevent or disrupt official government action — especially if it would end up infringing upon the rights of others.

Like any deviation from the presumption that speech is protected, these exceptions to the rule are limited, narrowly defined, and place the burden on the government to justify. First Amendment law recognizes that any attempt to suppress freedom of speech, no matter how well-intentioned, is a perilous endeavor. Carelessly allowing the government to regulate what can and cannot be said will cost us more than we bargained for. That is why each category of unprotected speech has been approached with a careful eye toward preserving free expression and avoiding government overreach — and the bar is set high for good reason.

Why lies should remain protected speech

The First Amendment generally protects speech from government punishment or censorship even if that speech is dishonest or false. But is that really the right thing to do? Given our current climate of fake news, misinformation, disinformation, and election lies, shouldn’t we use government power to set the record straight and establish the truth?

Not unless you think you or someone else can square all the lingering concerns about the risk of overbroad, overextended, or overapplied laws. As we covered in our explainer on misinformation, disinformation, and malinformation, allowing the government to define what constitutes these forms of speech is basically begging for it to abuse its power.

Just imagine the authority to determine and regulate lies in the hands of your worst enemies. Do you trust them to use it honorably? Why should they, then, trust you? The problem also goes beyond intentions. Even the most honest and well-meaning political actors can unwittingly succumb to bias, and the incentives to suppress inconvenient truths or ignore expedient lies are far too great to dismiss.

And as with most arguments relating to the restriction or regulation of free expression, the questions remain: Who decides? How do they decide? And who watches the watchmen?

In the majority opinion explaining why the Stolen Valor Act infringes upon free speech rights, Justice Kennedy stated the following:

The remedy for speech that is false is speech that is true. This is the ordinary course in a free society. The response to the unreasoned is the rational; to the uninformed, the enlightened; to the straight-out lie, the simple truth… The First Amendment itself ensures the right to respond to speech we do not like, and for good reason. Freedom of speech and thought flows not from the beneficence of the state but from the inalienable rights of the person. And suppression of speech by the government can make exposure of falsity more difficult, not less so. Society has the right and civic duty to engage in open, dynamic, rational discourse. These ends are not well served when the government seeks to orchestrate public discussion through content-based mandates.

While striking down the law, Justice Kennedy also reaffirmed the principles of free expression and open discourse that the First Amendment has always protected and represented. Yes, lies may be divisive, dangerous, and destructive to our relationships, our social order, and our polity — but the truth can’t be enforced through the authority of the state. It is the government’s job to keep our speech free. It’s our job to find and uphold the truth through the use of that speech. That’s a lot of work and responsibility, and it can often be messy, but the alternatives have far greater and graver costs.

Some argue that times have changed — that modern technology has fundamentally shifted our discourse to the point where drastic, even draconian interventions on lies and misinformation are required. But the critical questions of who to grant that power to and how to check it linger on, and it is unlikely that they can ever be truly or satisfactorily answered.

In the meantime, lies are the price we pay for the freedom to discover the truth for ourselves.

==

Among the best arguments against controlling perceived "misinformation" and lies are:

The need to be able to tell, with certainty, the difference between a lie and a mistake. Some percentage of people who believe in Flat Earth are undoubtedly lying, but many genuinely believe what they're saying. You can't punish people for simply being wrong.

Processes like science are never done. They must always consider the possibility: what if you're wrong? Or even just, what if you missed something, or what if you don't have the whole picture? The Church knew the "truth" and punished Galileo for "misinformation."

Perhaps more self-interested compellingly, never establish a policy or precedent that your enemies can use against you when they're in power. (And if your immediate instinct is, well, we'll just make sure they don't/can't get into power, you might want to consider the position in history of those who said the same thing.)

#Angel Eduardo #free speech #freedom of speech #First Amendment #freedom of expression #misinformation #protected speech #censorship #religion is a mental illness