#okay we're not solid rn but let's see

[nkogneatho]

i just know he has a pretty cock with a flushed tip that shines with precum

#babe wake up. pasi unlocked a new selfship #okay we're not solid rn but let's see #pasi.txt #noritoshi kamo

[sockmeat]

okay soo requesting for lucifer, cause man is such a sad boy. Okay, idk how these things works I never done like a request so bare with me. So like Lucifer is introducing us (y/n??) to Charlie, you know like were dating her dad lol. And he gets all nervous, and we're like super calm, chill and getting along with Charlie but Lucifer is just a hot mess of anxiety lol

                                                        𓆩♡𓆪

✼__________________________________________________________✼

𝐆𝐍 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 -- 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐞... (𝑯𝒂𝒛𝒃𝒊𝒏 𝑯𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒍)

(𝐰𝐜): 490

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: After a long time of you being with Lucifer, you finally get the opportunity to meet his daughter, Charlie.

(𝐀/𝐍): Wow i'm going off rn go me

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): Lucifer is a wreck

                                                        𓆩♡𓆪

♡ You were the one to offer to meet Charlie.

♡ You specifically brought it up after he got Charlie the meeting with Adam. You would've done it before, but they hadn't talked for so long before that point, that you felt it wouldn't be right to bring it up.

♡ But, since Lucifer is warming up to the idea of getting close to Charlie again, you sat him down and asked if you could meet her.

♡ You figured since he thinks of Charlie so highly, and she's his daughter, it would only be right for you to meet her.

♡ But Lucifer was terrified of the idea.

♡ He couldn't think of a solid reason, but he was just so damn nervous, he was too scatterbrained to think of something.

♡ He was just thinking of everything that could go wrong instead of what could actually happen.

♡ Thankfully, you've been with Lucifer long enough that you knew how to handle him when he got like this.

♡ You cracked him until he came to the conclusion that he was just terrified Charlie wouldn't approve of your relationship.

♡ You weren't nervous at all, though.

♡ Lucifer would talk about Charlie all the time, you were confident she wouldn't be so quick to judge and deny you on the first meeting.

♡ It was a few days of Lucifer sitting on the idea before Charlie called to ask him to visit the hotel.

♡ Lucifer was excited about finally getting to see his daughter again and you were excited because you could finally meet her!

♡ Surprisingly, Lucifer was the one to bring it up, by walking you out the door himself and talking about how excited he was.

♡ But that excitement quickly turned into nerves, in typical Lucifer fashion.

♡ You were able to successfully keep his nerves controlled until you were finally at the Hotel and Charlie let you in.

♡ Lucifer first turned his attention to Keekee, then Razzle and Dazzle, before he ran out of things to stall with.

♡ Charlie introduced Vaggie to Lucifer as her girlfriend and that's when Lucifer saw an opening and pushed through.

♡ It wasn't as smooth as he had hoped, but he nearly melted into his boots when you took over and introduced yourself to everyone in the hotel.

♡ He was even more relieved when you and Charlie hit it off without a hitch.

♡ You both talked passionately about her Hazbin Hotel project, with you being interested and her being eager to tell someone about it.

♡ Lucifer was very happy to see his two favorite people getting along so well, even when Alastor was taunting him and trying to get under his skin.

♡ With the way you and Charlie bonded, there was no denying that this wouldn't be the last time you would meet, and you would definitely bring Lucifer with you.

                                                        𓆩♡𓆪

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel lucifer x reader #lucifer magne x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer x reader #x gn reader #x gender neutral reader #x gn!reader #my writing #headcanons

[just-jordie-things]

idk if your requests are open so i’m sorry if they’re not :( but i really really need some comfort rn so if it’s not to hard could you write jjk men comforting reader who’s just had an all around shitty day? idc who else is in it, but i really like yuta and megumi:)) -🌿

I'm always down for some blurbs! hope it gives ya some comfort nonnie <3

OKKOTSU YUUTA

okkotsu finds you sitting alone during your free period. at first very excited to approach you and ask to join, because he rarely got to spend one on one time with you. you mostly only spent time together as a group with the other second years, so this could finally be his chance to, i don't know, woo you?

but upon nearing you, he realizes that you're quietly crying to yourself, and now his excitement is replaced with concern.

"(y/n)?"

as soon as you noticed him there, you're quick to wipe your tears and plaster on a friendly smile.

"oh- hi," you chuckle nervously, and hope he hadn't seen you crying for the last ten minutes. "sorry, i didn't see you there"

"are you okay?" he asks, sitting beside you and staring at you in a way that made you embarrassed to have been caught.

"yeah, i just- yeah," you stammer, unsure of what to say, as you didn't want to bother him. "don't worry about it, i'm fine" you decide, giving him another smile that he could see right through.

"you're crying," yuuta frowns. "do you want to talk about it?"

your mouth opens, and then closes, still unsure if you should dump your issues onto him. you weren't usually one to vent to your friends, everyone had their own problems going on, it was just the way of life in this society, but yuuta seemed so genuinely concerned it would make your heart hurt to turn him away.

"you sure?" you ask quietly.

he laughs, genuinely laughs, with a smile and crinkled eyes, like you'd just told a silly joke and hadn't asked for his consent to vent your issues. you seem confused by this, which only makes him continue to chuckle as her speaks.

"of course i'm sure," he says, reaching out to brush away a stray tear you'd missed. your cheeks heat up. "we're friends, right? friends talk to each other when they're upset,"

the way your heart skipped a beat at his mere concern for your feelings didn't seem like he was just a friend to you, but you decided you could circle back to that later.

"or, if you'd rather, we could go on a snack run and watch a movie, if you just want to forget about it" he offered politely.

this time, you gave him a real smile, and it finally felt like you weren't going to burst into tears again.

"we could do both?" you suggested quietly, and yuuta grinned ear to ear. ___

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI

you weren't sure how long you'd been crying, but it was long enough that it was no longer just a cry, but definitely a full on breakdown.

which, you were a person in tune with your emotions, so when you felt like you needed to let it all out in a healthy way, you would.

but today wasn't one of those days. today was a terrible day. and it had come out of nowhere. so instead of doing any of your homework or anything to distract your mind, you'd collapsed into bed and let your emotions completely engulf you.

it's not until your phone is ringing that you even wonder how long you'd been smearing wet makeup into your pillows.

you want to take the thing and chuck it against the wall, silencing it forever, but when you see it's megumi calling you go against your better judgement.

megumi was a solid texter, like most of your generation, he hated phone calls. he would actively decline calls just to text the caller and ask what it was they needed, firmly believing there was nothing you could say in a call that couldn't be texted.

so seeing his name lighting up your screen, you figured it must have been important. sniffling and clearing your throat to hide your strained voice, you answered.

"hey, 'gumi"

"hey sweetheart," he greets, and you can hear his smile through the phone, somehow. it brightens your mood in the slightest. "you still studyin'?"

"uh," you pause, glancing over to your bag of textbooks that sat on your floor, unmoved from when you'd thrown it to the ground before falling into bed. "no"

despite you trying your best to mask your emotions, your voice cracks on the single word, and megumi being who he is, picks up on it right away.

"you alright?" he asks without missing a beat.

in the two years he'd known you, he'd never heard or seen you cry. not even after everything you'd been through together. so hearing your voice strain and crack lights up an instinct in him to protect. to fix.

"yeah, sorry," you clear your throat, hoping to feign ignorance, as though your mouth had just played a trick on you and made ou fumble your words. "what were you calling for-?"

"sounds like you've been crying," megumi cuts off the bullshit and questions her again. "what's goin' on? did something happen?"

your eyes betray you, welling with tears as megumi's concern for your well being becomes evident.

"it's nothing, i'm fine"

"you're a terrible liar, sweetheart," megumi sighs, and so do you. "what happened?"

you fall back onto your bed again, biting your lip to keep any other broken sounds from escaping you.

"nothing, really," you say through a heavy breath. "don't worry 'bout it"

just as you start to melt into the comfort of your blankets, there's a knock on your door. you lift your head at the sound, but then choose to ignore it.

"don't worry about it?" megumi repeats with a small scoff. "course i'm gonna worry about it. did someone say something? do something?"

tears prick at the corners of your eyes, threatening to send you into another sobbing fit.

"don't wanna bother you" you mumble out your lame excuse. megumi scoffs again on the other end of the line.

another knock sounds at your door.

"you could never bother me, sweetheart," he says honestly.

your heart melts at how sweet he could sound sometimes. you wonder if he even knows that he's talking like a romantic, or if that's just how he's grown to speak to you.

"now come get the door, i look like an idiot out here"

you're quick to sit up again, sliding off the bed and crossing the room to slide your door open.

sure enough, there's megumi, with his phone to his ear and a small smile on his face. he ends your call and tucks his phone into his pocket, before reaching his arms out and pulling you into him.

you practically crash into his chest, clinging to the back of his shirt as the tears pool in your eyes again. he just stands there, hugging you comfortingly and letting you cry for a few minutes. but he's the first to break the silence.

"figured you weren't doin' too well," he mumbles, resting his cheek against your head as his hand rubs circles on your back. "didn't text me all day, thought you were mad at me or somethin'"

"no," you mumbles, shaking your head against his chest. "I'm not mad at you. i just... i just had the shittiest day"

he hums, hugging you tighter.

"well, I'm here now," he says, and he doesn't know it, but it was the most comforting thing he could've told you.

well, he might've figured it out when you hold onto him even tighter, but he doesn't realize right away why that was significant to you.

"wanna talk about it?"

you look up at him, in all of your teary eyed, runny mascara glory. despite the pang of concern, he smiles at you, bringing a hand away from your back to wipe some of the black stains away from your cheeks.

you nod a little back at him.

"in bed?" you sniffle, and he nods, finally stepping into your room and sliding your door shut behind him.

"so you can fall asleep on me?" he asks.

your hand finds his and the action makes his face go hot, but he squeezes your palm reassuringly.

you nod again in answer to his question, already pulling back the blankets with your free hand so you could both climb under and end a terrible day on a good note. ___

GOJO SATORU

if this man ever finds you in a bad mood, prepare for the ultimate goddess treatment.

first, he's all over you, holding you, wiping away/kissing away your tears, but letting you get it all out. will probably pull you into his lap and rock you. early on in the relationship this might have felt infantilizing, but as time goes on it's just so comforting that you'll find yourself crawling into his lap to be cradled.

once you've got the tears out of your system, he let's you vent. and really vent, too. he'll hang onto every word as you explain the misfortune you'd encountered that day, always taking your side. if you had a fight with someone, he's shit talking them. if someone's hurt your feelings, he's shit talking them.

god forbid you've been physically hurt, because he'll teleport away and back in a matter of seconds with someone else's blood on his knuckles without question.

after you've talked through the whole situation, he's onto step three. which is fix the day! this usually includes sweets, a warm bubble bath, and then a prolonged period of cuddle time. sometimes on the couch while binging your new favorite show, and sometimes in a comfortable silence in bed. no matter where it is, expect satoru to get anything you might need. water? wine? a snack? a comfy pair of pajamas? he's up and at it before you could even think of getting up for it.

gojo satoru is already a whipped romantic, but expect ten times more praise and flirty comments after a bad day. it would almost be annoying, if he wasn't so genuine about his sweetness. you swear it's all the sugar in his system. (seriously, he'll remind you how much he loves you every two minutes. if he had control over what he said in his sleep, you were sure he'd keep at it even through the night)

even the next day you get a special breakfast and your favorite drink waiting for you when you wake up. he can't cook to save his life it definitely came from your favorite restaurant ten minutes prior <3 ___

INUMAKI TOGE

toge finding you crying only makes you want to cry more, to be honest.

you thought you'd be in the clear turning down an empty corridor when the tears finally came on. you'd been keeping them down all day, which had taken quite a lot of energy. so when they crept up on you and burned your throat, you knew you'd have to duck somewhere to quickly collect yourself before anyone could see.

unfortunately for you, the day's events wouldn't stop replaying in your mind as you wiped your eyes repeatedly, the tears were nonstop. now you were sliding down to the floor, holding your face in your hands as you sobbed quietly.

and much less to your liking, you could hear footsteps approaching. at a regular rate at first, before picking up speed and now rushing towards you.

looking up, you found a very worried looking toge kneeling before you. you wanted to tell him to go away, but he was already unzipping his collar and asking you if you were alright... in his own way.

"mustard leaf!?" it comes out panicked, afraid that he was the worst person to find you like this.

if you were having a panic attack, he feared he wouldn't be capable of helping you out of it. his cursed speech really was that sometimes, cursed.

"i- i'm fine," you hiccuped over your words.

the waterworks pouring out of your face told him the truth, and toge furrowed his brows, frowning deeply.

"jus' a bad day," you whimpered. "really, you c-can go," you hope he'll listen, and leave you be to cry over your humiliation. "i don't want you to s-see me like this"

toge shakes his head, trying to find a way to communicate what little he could that he'd never leave you here like this.

he reaches out to you, cupping your face in his hands, stroking his thumbs over your skin to wipe away the tears. the action catches you so off guard that you find yourself holding your breath. this effectively helps you to calm down and the tears eventually stop falling.

you're still a little embarrassed, but when you look at toge, he doesn't seem to pity you or mock you at all. he seems completely worried over you, his brows drawn in a knot, his own eyes glossy, he's even chewing on his lip.

he cared about you this much?

"thanks, toge" you say once you've caught your breath again, and your throat doesn't feel as strained.

he nods back at you, pinching your cheek softly, affectionately. he offers you a sweet smile, before sticking his tongue out. you give him a wobbly smile in return.

when you seem to be feeling better, he drops his hands, only to hold your shoulders and pull you forward so that he can hug you. you're stunned at first, but cave into it, wrapping your arms around his neck and clinging on, soaking up all the comfort you could get.

"i needed this" you sigh, shutting your eyes and melt into him further.

toge squeezes you back tighter. ___

don't forget to give yourself time to cry and heal lovelies <3 xoxo ~ jordie

#okkotsu yuuta x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #gojo satoru x reader #inumaki toge x reader #okkotsu yuuta imagine #okkotsu yuuta headcanons #fushiguro megumi imagine #fushiguro megumi headcanons #inumaki toge imagine #inumaki toge headcanons #gojo satoru imagine #gojo satoru headcanons #jjk x reader #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jjk headcanons #jjk imagine #jujutsu kaisen imagine #toge brainrot #megumi brainrot #satoru brainrot #yuuta brainrot

[quodekash]

im already about to cry and the episode hasn't even started yet, so that's a nice sign that'll probably foreshadow how tonight is gonna go

PLS I LOVE HER SO MUCH

SHE ACTUALLY LISTENS AND TALKS TO KANGHAN

SHE IS MY GODDESS

MY QUEEN

MY MILF

9GO3U4ERHDSGN9P8IO4EURBDGN980OEUVDS

I KNEW SHE WAS CAPTAINING THE SHIP BUT HOLY FRICK NUGGETS

GUEOJRKBGNUOERJDFBGEUOR

IM SOBBING SO HARD RN

lmao nice joke

based on this scene being right at the start here, this episode is definitely gonna be the one where he properly realises his feelings for sailom (if he hasn't realised them already, which I dont think he has. he hasn't accepted it, at least)

AND BASED ON THAT LOGIC, generally the way these writers and directors etc base these ones, they fully lean into the fell first / fell harder dynamic, and almost immediately after the second person realises, they kiss

SO im very much hoping for a kiss at the end of this episode (but it also might not be til next episode)

WE'RE WHAT, ONE MINUTE INTO THE EPISODE?? AND WE'RE ALREADY GETTING TO THE INTIMATE STARES????

OH BOY IM SCARED FOR THE REST OF THE EPISODE

I THINK MY GAY LITTLE HEART MIGHT ACTUALLY EXPLODE

oh yup, oh yup, we've got the heartbeat sound in the background. kang's feelings are coming to lightttt (PLEASE LET THEM KISS TODAY)

AAA

IM SO EXCITED FOR WHATS GONNA HAPPEN BC OF THIS

my theory that they're gonna run away during school hours is still going strong

NOOOOO THE SCENE WAS SO NICE AND HAPPY AND FLUFFY WHY ARE YOU HERE TO RUIN IT YOU BASTARD???

yup okay so that theory is definitely right

(the theory that saifah's gonna like steal from kang's house, and his dad is gonna get shot in the process. not my own theory, it's from @ respectthepetty and it's such a good theory, I love it so much)

OML THIS IS SO FUNNY

I CANT WAIT FOR MORE BATHROOM SHENANIGANS, THIS IS GONNA BE WONDERFUL

awh is he lonely?

he needs a hug

from kang

all through the night

it'll be insane if they do tho, its literally night one, there's no way

I TAKE IT BACK, APPARENTLY IM WRONG????

OKAY NVM APPARENTLY I WASNT WRONG

im half convinced kang is gonna walk in or smth tho

YALL IM SCREAMING, HE FULL-ASS JUST HEEHEED

THEY ARE FRIENDS

AAAA THE LYRICS

I JUST LOVE THEM SO MUCH

THEYRE SO PLAYFUL WITH EACH OTHER

WHAT THE HELL

what I wouldn't give to be that driver rn

THE ARM OVER THE SHOULDER???????

THEYRE LITERALLY SO IN LOVE?????????

OMG

PIMFAH

MY WIFE

I rly wish that screenshot was better but the wifi is being stupid for no reason (which isn't surprising since this is Australia and we have the shittest wifi there is)

anyway IM SO SURE JUNE IS GONNA SHOW UP TODAY

GIVE👏US👏LESBIANS👏

DID I NOT SAY IT?

I WAS RIGHT YALL

AAAAAAAAAAA

LITERALLY IMMEDIATE

AS SOON AS THE OTHER MAJOR FEMALE CHARACTER WAS INTRODUCED, B O O M, LESBIANS

I VERY MUCH APPRECIATE THIS

although I wasn't expecting it to be teacher/student

she is just a trainee teacher, but its still a bit ick

idk tho

I guess we'll see what they do with it

gay panic in real time

ooh yes ive been waiting for the familial need for an heir thing to crop up, yesyesyes

making me think of drarry now

OKAY SO MAYBE I WAS WRONG

MAYBE HE DOES LIKE HER

but the things I said are still true

the evidence we've gotten before just now havent really felt solid enough to argue that kang likes pimfah

but now... I guess I have to agree

pimfah knows/suspects/ships it and no one can convince me otherwise

IM WHEEZE-LAUGHING THIS IS HILARIOUS

THE MUSIC PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND?????

I CANT RN

SO THIS IS DEFINITELY A DREAM SEQUENCE, RIGHT?

I wasn't expecting imaginary scenes from this series but I deeply appreciate it

I CANT STOP LAUGHING

THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING, SAILOM

YOU SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED

BUT ITS ALSO SUCH A MOOD

also I like kang's shoes

Y E S

I WAS HOPING FOR OPEN HOUSE VIEWJUNE

again, I wasn't expecting it to be teacher/student, but anyway

OH YOU LESBIANN

G3I4ORENHGKLS

I would do the same tho

June is so pretty

and so is view

and so is chimon

and so is Perth

(and so is satang)

(no I will not shut up about my satang and perth siblings agenda, its too good to keep to myself)

NO IM OUT OF IMAGES

on the bright side, it took a lot longer to run out today than it did last week

#quodekash disregards sleep because of dangerous romance #dangerous romance #dangerous romance series #dangerous romance the series #kanghansailom #kangsailom #sailomkang #sailomkanghan #perthchimon #chimonperth #chimon wachirawit #perth tanapon #view benyapa #june wanwimol #viewjune #juneview #pimfahnabdao #nabdaopimfah

[my-castles-crumbling]

Cas babe, I'm royally fucked. The drama that is surrounding me rn is so fucking unreal.

So let me start from the very beginning, so I m a 16 yr old girl and i hv this really close guy friend let's call him J, so J and I have been friends since forever, like I don't even remember when I first met him. I have known him since I was born , like I have never known a life without J. And i love him like a brother.

Ok so fast forward a few years and now we're both 16, and we met this girl, Lottie she was a transfer student and we ( J , Lottie and I) had a few classes together. And slowly we develop a friendship.

Now the thing is that J has a crush on Lottie and he told me as soon as he realised it and me being the great friend that I am have subtly been wingwomaning him .

So, last week after English class (only Lottie and I have this class) , Lottie asked me out. Yeah, and I'm straight af but I'm an ally. So I was like what? But she was like i thought u were queer coz u give very strong queer vibes which is kinda true because I have a MAJOR crush on lily Rose depp and i hv always said that she could run me over with her car and I'd thank her and beg her to fuck me, (yeah I have issues.) And I also have bi friend who i jokingly call my wife bcoz when she came out ppl were being very homophobic and i thought that was the only way to support her. (i was 14 ok i don't judge me)

So back to Lottie I wa obviously s so very awkward I was like ohhh. And i told her in the politest way i could manage that I m straight af (bcoz i am) and I'm kinda flustered that she has a crush on me bcoz she is really pretty. And she got very embarassed and started apologising and I was like no no it's fine , it's totally fine. Yeah but she also kinda requested me not to tell anyone else that she's a lesbian bcoz she's not out to everyone, and I was like Of course .And now she has been trying to avoid me for the few days which anyone in her position would do tbh, so I don't blame her for that.

Ok so now bcoz Lottie is avoiding me she's also avoiding J by extension coz we both r usually hanging out together. So i already told u that J has a crush on Lottie so he was obviously not happy that she was avoiding us and i couldn't tell him why bcoz OBVIOUSLY.

And a little note abt my best friend he is extremely fucking extra , he is the biggest drama queen in the world like Sirius Black level of drama. So now his dumbass decided that he will ask Lottie out, and bcoz he is so fucking extra abt everything he is thinking of using the help of his teammates ( he's on the football team) to ask her out after the football match next Friday.

And in trying to convince him that he should not do it, but when he asks why i don't have any solid reason because it's not my place to tell him abt Lottie. So he's really planning everything to make the proposal perfect, and I'm stressing tf out.

I love J and i don't want to see him get hurt bcoz obviously Lottie is gonna say no, and on top of that it would be kinda humiliating bcoz the entire school and another school would be there. And I'm also worried that Lottie will think that I did this in purpose to embarrass her so now I'm stuck in a huge fucking dilemma.

And ngl I find this situation extremely fucking hilarious BCOZ WHAT IN THE WATTPAD LEVEL OF SHIT IS THIS? IS THIS SITUATION EVEN REAL? LIKE DOES THIS KINDA SHIT EVEN HAPPEN IRL???

pls help me bcoz I don't know what tf I'm going to do and i hv to do something before Friday or 😭😭😭.

omg I have to say- the way I was literally gasping throughout this story because...wow

So first, I want to say I think you were really sweet with Lottie. It sounds like you're a super kind person, and a wonderful ally <3

Honestly, I would probably talk to Lottie (if possible) and tell her that J is about to ask her out in front of the entire school, and ask her if it's okay for you to tell him that she's simply not interested. The reason I think this is the best option is because, either way Lottie will find out about J's feelings, so you can't really prevent that. This way, you're preventing embarrassment for both Lottie and J. Also, you're possibly protecting Lottie from attention by telling J you just "heard Lottie is not interested" because that doesn't out Lottie. AND even if J doesn't listen to you, you've helped by both preparing Lottie for what will happen and by sort of...introducing J to the idea that she's not interested.

So yeah. I think this is your best bet.

Keep me updated, I'm dying to know what happens!

(Also I am naming all the anons who write to me in case they want to write in the future, and I am using a random positive affirmation generator to do so. So I dub thee: caring anon. Enjoy your free tag!)

#ask #asks #ask cas #caring anon

[sourseat]

we're 1/4 through the year its time to check in with the goals and vibes

this post is so long

so tbh i haven't been thinking much about the goals and vibes i set at the start of the year. in fact rereading them there are many i had forgotten about lol. so let's revisit

theme no. 1 was self-assurance. i was feeling insecure last year apparently (how quickly i forget...) and wanted to feel solid in myself. i think this is feeling good! i'm not sure it needs to be theme no. 1 anymore! but i'll keep it because it is nice to feel self-assured. feeling insecure is not pleasant.

theme 2 was consume less. this is pretty good and remains a theme i am vibing with

third theme is let go of clinging to / craving stability and certainty. yeah i think i have integrated this. stability is something i might pursue but not something i will expect.

and the goals

join a choir / sing regularly in some form - nixed for now. not vibing.

do at least one overnight camping hike (hopefully more) - okay its so windy here maybe i'll hike and stay in huts or something idk about camping. we'll see!!

go to the pole studio in the town i'll be living in and suss the vibe. if the vibe is good enroll in classes! - i haven't been to the one closest to me yet!! but i will soon and have been to another studio so :)

keep journaling (i've journaled each day this year!) or at least remember journaling is there, and is helpful (i've noticed i tend to journal a lot in Jan and then stop) - i have kept up the journaling! not every day but at least a few times a week.

figure out how i want to have meditation in my life - a work in progress but this is moving up the priority list rn. i have been anxious. meditation helps w that for me.

sort out my digital archives - i haven't started this and the thought of doing so is deeply overwhelming in the terrible way where it gets more overwhelming the longer i wait

finish editing all my half edited videos - : / nope and i'm about to lose access to premiere pro so !! ???

read more poetry, memorise 3 poems (i'm memorising the raven at the moment, it is so long that it might take me all year) - i forgot about this lol, i'm kinda still into it but its low on the list

do PhD revisions and be finished with the phd for REAL - i submitted a draft to my supervisor! nearly done :)

write (at least) one article based on the phd (a reluctant goal. i must.) - feeling confident i will do this due to the environment i am in!

okay some good goals in here. i have been thinking i wanna do some prioritisaiton. that is a long list of goals up there. too many. so here are the ones i am gonna keep in mind for now

Work + career development - stay on top of my job, submit articles, apply for conferences. i am gonna have to keep living for my whole life somehow so i'd best use this time to set myself up to be able to get a job in this field i have spent a bunch of time in.

Meditation + journaling - really wanna get a good vibe with meditation again. Still unsure what this will look like but will prioritise figuring it out.

Organising - there's a genocide happening and I'm not doing shit. wanna get connected with organising communities here. weird being in a new place and not knowing anyone.

Pole + stretching - feeling strong in pole classes recently has felt sooooo good! And dancing... I love it. I think there's not much else in my life here yet that brings that level of joy.

Maintain relationships w people in Aus - this is like a time consuming thing that requires thought! I somehow did not foresee this! And I do want to prioritise it. Messaging people, scheduling calls, this kinda thing. I don't really like messaging generally lol so, it is on the list!!

Travel - I want to see Ireland and Europe while I'm here! And can already sense how easy it will be for two years to pass without me going anywhere.

And backburner goals

Do an overnight hike

Sort out my digital archives

Read + memorise more poetry.

#resolutions

[poems-of-a-lover]

nick watches spiderman (cont.)

im gonna make another post bc i have a feeling im close to hitting the text limit on my other one but we're still on the first movie!! im gonna try and get thru this movie soon bc i HAVE to get to the second ones before my demons get me

okay where we are rn ben just died and peters in his evil era tryin to find the guy who did it

like hes just goin up to random dudes and beating them up bc he thinks its The Guy when its not

and every time i watch this movie i forget if they find him or if the plot point is abandoned bc peter has bigger problems by then KJGSHLKGJHSKH guess we'll remember together

peter falls thru a roof and these guys just let him go. like they leave him there. to be fair what were they supposed to do but still.

this is where we get the inspo to make a suit!! he sees a wrestling poster and is like "that could be me =D"

agh i wanna look like him so BAD bro i wish that were me

shoutout to him STEALING FROM OSCORP to make his web fluid thats so funny

this handstand moment is apparently judged by a lot of fans as him becoming spiderman but theyre SO wrong that doesnt happen until later in the film in my opinion

like thats just my opinion but other ppl can be wrong ig /lh

also how did he get this police radio. how do any of the spidermans get their radios. did they take them from officers. can u buy them. whats goin on here.

omggggg its captain stacyyyyy he'll be important later

like. incredibly important. GKJHSGKJSHGKJ we'll get to him in a minute.

"spandex.....spandex.......everything.......spandex......" i love peter so much

HE'S MAKIN THE SUITTTTT HES GOT THE SUIT NOW!!!!! THE SUIT OF ALL TIME!!!!!!!!!

i love this suit sooooo much its so textured and i love the logo its so fun

this car thief scene is rlly the scene of all time i love it

so many good peter lines from this scene

"seriously? u rlly think im a cop? a cop in a skin tight red and blue suit? yknow, u have got the mind of a true scholar, sir" PETER PLEASE BE NORMAL

this head tilt. the peter head tilt. in this context its kinda menacing but hes so me coded bc i also do the head tilt thing KHGSKJDHGKJ

the first time i saw this scene and for a while after i thought he told the cop "i just TOOK 80% of ur job" after he took the gun but he actually says "i just DID 80% of ur job" bc he webbed the criminal and i was so disappointed bc i rlly thought he was making a solid dig at the police force but hes just being petty KJGHSKJGHKSJ

ugh him talking to may here makes me sooooo sad. "u dont have to wait up for me, yknow" "yes i do" SHE LOVES HER NEPHEW PLEASEEEE

shes so worried for her nephew. seeing him hurt just destroys her. this boy is all she has. she lost her husband, her brother, her sister in law, and seeing her nephew come home at god knows what time just beat up and wounded must be so heartwrenching and she cant do anything bc he wont talk to her. i love tasm may shes so interesting.

"aunt may please, please go to sleep." "i cant sleep! dont u understand? i cant sleep! peter, listen to me. secrets have a cost, theyre not for free. not now, not ever." SOOOOO TRUE QUEEN. I SENSE A THEME.

AND THEN HE JUST WALKS OFF. LEAVES HER THERE. AJHGJSKGJAGFSJHF

oh yeah they're pushing curt to start human trials when they cure isnt ready, oscorp is so incredibly corrupt and its done so well in both films

"people die. even norman osborn." AKJGHKJSAGH SOOOOOO TRUE. YES. I HATE NORMAN SO MUCH.

also sorry for just quoting this movie so much it has so many good lines that i could talk about for the rest of my life

oh yeahhhhh this guy wants to start human trials??? at the veterans hospital?????

ugh theyre talking about plot that we dont learn until like the second film so its not important yet but its such a cool thing later on

PETER AND GWENNNNN I LOVE THEM

she really cares about him and it makes me so happy

shes inviting him to dinner!!!! with her family!!!!! its a family hes never met eating a meal hes never heard of but still its with the girl he really likes so hes gonna just deal with it and show up anyway

ugh normans doing things /neg

hes doing human trials. on himself. lets see how this goes HGKJSDHGKJL

oh hi peter. dinner date time.

he brought gwens mother flowers???? KWHGKSJGHSKJHGK theyre a little messed up bc they were in his bag while he was swinging but still!!! he brought flowers for this girls mom hes so sweet

"you must be peter" "dad this is. peter." thank u gwen

oh yeah i failed to mention that the captain of the police department is gwens dad if u didnt catch that from his last name

curt has his arm back!!! the cure worked!!!! hoping and praying that nothing bad happens and he just gets to live a normal life and be happy from now on

he has to go catch the one guy that i forgot the name of (edit its dr ratha) from going to the veteran hospital but the cure is backfiring so hes like. goin thru it. lizard moment.

anyway peter cant cut fish corrcctly

hes never had a fancy meal like this!! hes a little dumb!!!

uh ohhhh theyre talking about spidermannnnn yikes

this is what it feels like to talk politics with relatives

"if i wanted the car thief off the street, he wouldve been off the street" "so why wasnt he then?" PETER. CHILL. UR TRYING TO DATE HIS DAUGHTER PLS BE NICE

"its called strategy, im sure ur aware of the term strategy? maybe u learned about that in school?" MR STACY U ARE ALSO NOT HELPINGGGG

"i think he stands for what u stand for, sir. protecting innocent people from bad guys." banger line right there skajfhksjd

peter still apologized and said that he didnt mean to insult mr stacy but still ksajdfhkjsd cmon peter be nice

BIG PLOT HOLE HERE. peter webs gwen and pulls her closer and she goes "youre spiderman?" before he kisses her. HE HASNT GOTTEN THAT NAME YET. NO ONES CALLING HIM SPIDERMAN YET. WHERE DID SHE GET THAT.

ugh it gets me every time like where did that come frommmm

peter pulling away completely and turning around when her mother catches them is so funny hes trying to be respectful

uh oh crime time

HE JUST JUMPS OFF THE ROOF. BYE.

so yeah curt connors is now a giant lizard monster thing trying to find dr ratha and?? kill him???? okay yeah kill him he just threw his car off the bridge

peter has this moment of either going after lizard or helping save this mans son and he goes to save the kid and i love peter so much

hes also very very good with kids. he convinces this little boy that his mask has special powers to help the kid get out of the car safe and its so sweet

like this kid is terrified and honestly so is peter but hes staying calm and convincing this kid that this mask will make him stronger so he can save him. THIS is the moment i was talking about. this is when peter becomes spiderman.

the moment he gave that kid back to his father alive and safe is when he became a superhero. thats also when he coins the name. but this exact moment is what made him into the actual hero rather than just having the name. he gets home and he stares at his mask bc now he knows he has an immense responsibility to save peoples lives and keep them safe.

i love this movie

oh yeah mr stacy issued an arrest warrant for spiderman after the bridge attack thats so silly of him.

more petergwen lets goooo

"does it scare you? what you can do?" "no." "...youve got to lay low." "no, cant do that." "youve got to. i mean, why?" "because of last night. those people on the bridge. whatever was attacking them wouldve killed them. so i gotta go after it." "thats not your job." "maybe it is." SUCHHHHH A GOOD CONVERSATION. UGH.

OKAY IM GONNA. LEAVE THIS ONE HERE. ive finally got motivation so im gonna keep it going in a reblog like right away but im gonna stop this post here before it gets too long skjhfksjd

#nick watches spiderman

[bradenthompson]

The Maze Runner (2014) notes

It was no contest which trilogy I was gonna plow through next. I mean, it was a bit of a contest (originally thought I was gonna jump into Hunger Games) but I prioritized the series of which I'd seen less of.

Now I HAVE seen this one before, actually. Saw it in theaters with a whole group of friends, most of which I didn't know, I've forgotten most of the fine details, should be a good chaser for Divergent.

>real quick, "get ready to run" is a great tagline. "Get ready to be hungry." "Get ready to abra kadabra."

>opening shot fucks. Just the screech of the elevator, our eyes adjust same time as the dude's. Gold star

>if you let yourself get manhandled by Will Poulter that's on you

>idk the main dude's name yet but I'll guess. He looks like a Danny. My guess is his name's Danny

>oh that kid looks exactly like a Newt. Growing confidence in main boy's name being Danny

>i do remember this kid who dies at the end. Sorry, sport, you don't look movie star enough. Work on that jawline, maybe get yourself a taper

>"welcome to the Glade (bitch)"

>trying to vaporize Newt with my mind

>ain't no way these kids are keeping track of the years. Honey idk what day of the week it is and I got a widget at the bottom of my monitor (not checking it on principle)

>"no one's survived a night in the maze" okay okay i know how these things work. Danny's gonna make history

>stop calling him Greenie; his name is Danny

>"does he look like a Shank?" DANNY

>his name's not Danny. It's Thomas. No one talk to me rn, got a lot to work out

>sad to say I don't think I'd be a Runner. Probably be one of the guys that makes the food. Bet there's a quiz on one of the YA sites.

>who among us hasn't been mounted, strangled, unable to gain advantage, and reached to our sides to find a hand-sized, head-cracking apparatus? This movie tells my experience

>ik it's dumb of me to once again be asking who cuts all the hair, but seriously

>nvm, I believe that's a job around the Glade (we call them Shearers)

>death by maze, death by maze, death by maze

>"no one's ever survived a night in the maze" is the most telegraphed thing so far but I appreciate the setup. Movie's running at a solid clip

>lmao @ the maze monster quieting down to give Thomas a spook

>real sweet of the Gladers to hang around the maze entrance all night. Apparently just to entertain Chuck. Those are homies

>Danny Thomas setting Glade records on his third day. Man's looking for a promotion

>Really giving him the cold Poulter, ain't he (you don't have to laugh)

>exactly one girl showing up, nightmare nightmare nightmare

>didn't catch the part about Newt being the new leader. He looks quite overthrowable

>idk shit about mysteries but I like the speed this movie runs at. What's in the cannister, Danny Thomas?

>these boys are positively cracked at building shelters. I don't think I could built a hut in three years

>and scale models????

>girl's having a very reasonable response to this, gotta say

>Danny Thomas has still only been here three days?

>still appreciate the speed this is moving, but scenes have developed a sort of pattern: "I think we should do this" "no fuck you we should do this" "guys!" "what?!" "element from two scenes ago has developed"

>boy who just got grabbed by a Griever is named Zort

>so Danny Thomas, with like six essential Galders a foot behind him, goads one of the Grievers with a "come on!" as if it's not twelve feet long and immediately dangerous to everyone in a twenty foot vicinity. See this is why you're not the leader, Danny Thomas

>Will Poulter delivers THE most telegraphed punch of all time and Danny Thomas still gets caught with one. Bro wound up like Popeye, dude, that's your fault

>speaking of his fault, and ik we're not supposed to side with him and I'm not saying I do, I'm just saying Poulter's processing of these past few minutes is not unreasonable. This did indeed happen due to choices made by the Runners, intended by maze design or not. If anything, I think the Runners are being too gung-ho about this, considering the immediate consequences of every advancement they make

>bravo to Maze Runner for its introductions and executions. Coming into this from a trilogy of movies in love with introducing a concept then just kinda letting it fester in the frame, it feels like every element presented here has a later relevance. Danny Thomas noticing the Griever stings make the other Gladers seemingly remember something from their past, thus stinging himself to intentionally conjure his own? Well done, Whoever Wrote This Book I'm Not Looking It Up Right Now

>dude, and Poulter distrusting Danny Thomas because he, on a subconscious level, remembers seeing him when he got locked in the amnesia tank? Whoever Wrote This Book I'm Not Looking It Up Right Now really thought of everything

>literally just typing "oh cool of him to not implicate Teresa in the 'I did experiments on you guys' thing" but then he immediately does, lol. Why did the other guys have to know that about her right now, couldn't you tell her that in private

>screenwriters make british actors say Ass on purpose bc they know they'll say it funny

>ooh we got Return of the Jedi nods, somethin most silly's about to happen

>reasonable estimate on Poulter's part: if the protagonists go back in the maze they'll instigate some more Griever shit, probably. Unless the maze doors are just open permanently, now, in which case it makes no difference, Poulter

>Mutinyyyyyyyyy

>was just thinking "don't these kids wanna pack before they leave the Glade forever" but like pack what lol

>I wanna know the life story of the extra who elected to stand like this:

>Danny Thomas is just full of Trailer Lines, isn't he

>score's very generic in this, unfortunately. Could've done cool motifs, divide the Glade and the Maze orchestrally but just about all of it's unremarkable

>half these Grievers die like Land Before Time villains

>then again I also like the lack of music, a lot of the time. Makes things tense

>feeling like there's not enough of a visual difference between the Science Facility and the Glade/Maze. Sure there's video screens but the color scheme's identical. Should've been like the difference between the Commonwealth and the Institute in Fallout 4, like that sucker punch of a juxtaposition

>calculated that 24% of all lines in this movie are "we call it the (noun)"

>so these kids represent the new generation of humans immune to The Flare, so they were trapped in The Maze to study what makes them immune, and it's not just that these kids have antibodies. Like it's not just that. Not saying I follow but I won't get hung up on it rn

>"is it over?" "I don't know, chuck; think maybe we're in the figurative book one of the proverbial multi-book series that is our lives. Three books, at least."

>hahahahahaaaaaa, okay, lining up the cast in frame, "this is just the beginning," music swells, only for Poulter to run in for the antagonistic walk-off homer is good stuff

>weirdly articulate and conversational for someone who's been stung, gotta say

>one thing I remember from my first viewing was my theater cracking up when it's revealed Chuck's been shot

>what do actors think about when they pretend to be dead and their costar is crying over them

>"we call them whirly-twirlies (helicopters)"

>nice of the move go give us/the character's a bird's eye view of the maze, smart of them to wait until the very end

>"Time to begin Operation Sequel"

>author's name is James Dashner. Aight. Good work, G, got a few notes for you: --Thomas' name should've been Danny --that's it

So all in all I like the movie. Note that me liking something and being a fan are different concepts. Movie's exactly where it needs to be and there's obvious care and respect being taken, which I'm sure the fans can appreciate even if maybe Character A isn't rude enough or they cut out Character H. As for what the next movies'll be like, idk, but I'm excited to see.

#movies #the maze runner #nightblogging

[un-pearable]

OKAY season 3 thoughts time. not as long but also s3 was like half the size:

worst thing first: the jay/naya/cole love triangle is so ...... bland. its got nothing going for it. like at this point in the show jay/naya honestly speaking doesn't really have a lot going for it. like we dont ever see them hang out or do fun stuff together as a couple or have any cute bonding scenes outside of jay being like "wowww nya hot" or anything. we dont have any real reason to root for them, so why they decided to introduce a love triangle is beyond me. like i guess its because they haven't done anything interesting with jay/naya and a love triangle is the easiest and blandest option possible, but like. come on. cole & naya barely interact in the season outside of cole fighting with jay and i'm really confused as to why we're supposed to think cole has any romantic interest in naya because they... have even less going for them than jay/naya. like man if we're gonna have a love triangle anyways i'd like to have any reason to root for at least one side. please. im not asking for much. make your characters hang out a bit and have some common interests and enjoy spending time together before you start telling me they're in love.

number two: im kind of obsessed with how garmadon's moral standards consistently disappear when it comes to lloyd. like pre this season he takes his vow of non violence or whatever but after lloyd gets captured it just. goes completely out the window. moral compass: son

number three: circling back to ninjago's inability to write a compelling romance i dont inherently mind zane/pixel (and its certainly got better writing than the.... uh . competition, if you want to even bother calling it that) but i do wish the writers would start out these romantic relationships with a much more solid platonic base. like its not the end of the world but i do wish it was more compelling.

number four: ZANE GIRLBOSSING IT THIS SEASON FINALE!!!!!!!!!!! this is one of the few things i did remember from like 8 years ago and for good reason its because hes literally perfect in every single way

number five: im nitpicking here but i think lloyd should get to swear. i think he's earned it

number six: this is more of a general observation than anything else but one thing i think is really . weird. about ninjago's writing is that it seems that every season they give the ninja new cool epic powers and then by the next one they get taken away. and like i understand the reasoning for this - its like when shounen writers keep giving their protagonist increasingly world-shattering powers and the power levels just keep getting more and more ridiculous, because if your original villain is "conquering the whole world and turning everybody evil" then theres only so much you can amp that up as the seasons go on without tacking on too many powers that nobody should be able to stand up to the hero anymore - but also its just. its just weird because i dont think ive ever seen anything like this.

okay i think thats abouttt it im, as always, very excited to get to some of the things i distantly recall (namely in particular the giant green eyeball thing and possibly a tournament / survival island arc that i think was a thing (???)) i know lots is in store and all i really want rn is character interactions. thats my dream i will honestly forgive so much as long as im having fun with the characters and dynamics in a series

whuff…. yeah. as much as thematically i love pixal and theoretically jaya could be extremely interesting. they do NONE of the work to make them so. zane <3 <3 baby’s first traumatic character death. he is. he really is. he deserves it all and so much more. whoever’s censoring lloyd must get paid well bc that kid grew up in eternal middle school. kid knows more swear words than the rest of these socially isolated dorks let him use them

i’ve never really thought about that but,,,, holy shit yeah???? i’m nowhere near an active dragon ball fan but it IS baffling that instead of the usual shonen style they-just-keep-getting-new-powers and we stop using them bc a) we forgot they existed (which does happen a bit here, but less commonly) or b) they’re just obsolete, in ninjago they EXPLICITLY get said new powers taken away. multiple times. is it a medium limitation?? is it just a quirk of the writers??? i’m gonna be thinking about this all night

#have fun!!!! with s4!!!! it's my personal fave bc i love overdramatic interpersonal drama #and stupid creative fights and what else is a tournament arc but that #also i like titanium zane. he’s cool #god there’s so much potential in robot-who-thought-he-was-human now coming to terms with being a robot BUT right in the middle of him #finally processing it all. he ends up in a body that is MORE ROBOTIC THAN EVER. #oogh….. and by necessity. even if he was finally Fine with it it’s a big leap to make #i’ll shut up about zane now #hell yeah!!!!! i’m absorbing the fun and frustration you’re having through the screen. i am very much eager for your opinions about lloyd #and garmadon in s4 >:] #text✨ #sry it took a bit to post i was shooting myself in the foot (drawing) #liveninjablogging

[nis-si-hellhole]

🐶🏠🎤🎵💋💗 (For Leon!<3)

mika are you actively trying to kill me rn...... (affectionate)

🐶: If you and your f/o were to get a pet, what would it be?

Probably a cat or two or twelve. Leon is far too busy being Capcom's money printer a government agent who's seemingly thrown at any problem that so much as looks like it has monsters involved in it to be super involved in raising something that needs constant attention and I just do not have the energy and/or knowledge to fill that gap for many other animals.

...Maybe I could make an exception for him bringing the dog from RE4 back home tho. That's a good puppy. :)

🏠: What’s you and your f/o’s dream home?

Somewhere that's quiet but maybe not too isolated. I could see Leon being a little bit sick of big cities after dealing with one too many zombie outbreaks in such places and I'm just not compatible with a lot of city life but somewhere too isolated also has a number of problems. Maybe we could find a decent middle ground and like... idk live an hour or two away from a smaller city or something.

🎤: Describe your f/o’s voice

Not sure if I'm great at describing this kind of thing but I'll try asjajs. It's gotten somewhat deeper and more husky over time. It, uh, probably sounds really good when one lays on his chest and can just feel him speaking askljdlasjkldj-

🎵: What are some song lyrics that make you think of your f/o/your relationship with your f/o?

Taciturn by Stone Sour is on my Leon selfship playlist for a reason.

In the middle, under a cold black sky, the sun will only burn for you and I. ... In the middle, under a clear blue sky, the sun can only burn for you and I. ... Give me a sign, show me the line. Maybe tonight, I'll tell you everything.

This was trying to turn into a Leon essay/whole-ass song dissertation so i'll just leave it there asldklaksd.

💋: Where are your favorite places to kiss your f/o/where are their favorite places to kiss you?

Mika this is an active assassination attempt at this point /j.

I uh. I might just be a basic bitch here but I'd like kissing his face in general...... tho early on and on occasion further along, I'd have to get brave enough to do it lmao.

Leon probably has less reservations about initiating it (at least from a "if i do so i will Explode" standpoint alskd). As for where... maybe he's also a bit of a basic bitch and likes kissing my face the most. Though he probably just likes kissing whatever he can get his hands on, especially if he feels like being a bit of a lighthearted tease when I get flustered askdjsakjdsakj-

💗: How do you two like to cuddle?

Leon would definitely like being the one to hold me. I'm big, warm, solid, there. I'm real, he's real, we're safe. I haven't left. He hasn't failed to protect at least one thing.

...On a less melancholy note, I'm like a beeg teddy bear asdkljasd.

On the other hand, maybe he could give in and let me hold him sometimes and it's not just a Heh Leon's Muscles thing I promise. I wanna support and protect him, too! I want him to know I love him and wanna hold him!

...And, okay, maybe there is also an element of Heh Leon's Muscles in there too.

#ni blabs #~selfship: keep your eyes on the road ahead~ #lunarpanda #answering this took a minute b/c i had to fight the Flusters kajsdssf #nervous to bare my soul on the Baring My Soul blog

[monoton-e]

lovely little update:

i'm doing pretty good, all things considered. i'm actually learning how to drive behind the wheel, continuing transitioning my diet to foods that better serve me and my health, actually cleaning my room (I have never had a room be 100% clean. Always boxes here bags there, temporary tidy, so uh, this is HUGE for me. Just need to downsize my clothes and deal with a SINGLE box of old mail and paperwork. Woo), hell, decorate my room for the first time ever too (I've been living with blank off white walls ever since I've had my own room so it feels weird), listening to more music, cut off some people I thought were friends simply because we were in the same guild and not because of anything genuine, and stuff. Im shit at school, I realize. I dont know how to study. Also I procrastinate everything, really really bad. I started playing guitar again and I plan to start drawing again; it's been too long. My situationship remains as is, a situationship but honestly, its like a fwb but the benefits are emotional LMFAO well, there *is* some actual fwb but its all online which is a okay with me. Honestly a solid support friend, and I've gotten much closer to 2 other friends recently too. Its nice seeing people being genuine in their interactions with me simply because they want to be around me. I'm on the fence over one friendship, we call eachother besties because of how much we've gone through together, but they don't understand that I want nothing romantic with them, not even my normal everyday soft fluff affection I give to my friends normally. I've been distancing myself because its all I really can do. My relationship with my sister is still shit but we're taking it a day at a time. My parents and I are on better terms, but also tense in its own way because of financial tensions. I dont talk to my niece as much, but we still send eachother memes. Same with my bro. Thats really it. Oh, and my cat is still here, follows me around more often lately and likes to take naps on his tree and my room when its cold.

I'm doing good, still depressed and mentally and emotionally *shxt* but I'm good. Vitamin water is lit. So is sourdough toasted with a bit of honey on it. Lavender earl grey tea with a spoonful of shite sugar and a dash of milk is delicious. I miss the feeling of my skin being hydrated by simply existing outside like it was in LA. I am lonely as I dont have anyone out here in ABQ to call a friend and to spend time together but it is what it is. I feel more truthful and honest and more.. sincere? I dunno, I normally am but this time I dont really make an effort to fake it or try to people please anymore. Its been interesting.

I'm taking 2 classes and failing them rn (statistics and english). I haven't worked since November.

I'm struggling so much. Some days, the smallest thing will make me cry. Oh yeah, I'm a big ol crybaby these days. I'm sensitive af (not new) but I've been just feeling things out as long as I need to. Its not really good or bad, nor helpful really, but its nice to just let it out, exist, and listen to music.

I found my meds (been off for a few months b/c I lost them and lost the will to take em) but I took my first pill in a long time today. And yeah. Now thats it.

Thanks for reading, maybe I'll have more to say in terms of accomplishments next update, we'll see

#me #dnr #do not reblog #update #it really do be like that sometimes #woweewow #text #my text #mine #idk what other things i would tag

[tastyfishistasty]

"Average Zee listens to Hozier 1500 times a year" factoid is a statistical error. Sleep Playlist Georg who is played 365 times a year and contains 30 Hozier songs is an outlier and should not have been counted.

AKA: my sleep Playlist keeps messing with my Wrapped and as I can't actually remove that from the songs Spotify analyses, I'll do some data manipulation myself.

Disclaimer: Spotify sucks and wrapped is just more promotion of a shitty deal for artists, but I don't have other ways of listening to music atm and at least they get something compared to piracy.

Every evening I listen to my Sleep Playlist which features songs that I don't actively listen to but help my brain know it is sleep time, please stop. (ADHD is a joy).

This playlist is made of songs I enjoy but aren't too loud or jumpy or even ones that make me focus exclusively on the lyricism and the story of the song. They keep my brain interested enough to make enough dopamine so I can actually sleep, but not so interested that I won't sleep because this is more fun. It's a fine line.

I listen to this *every night* so it is a very highly played set of songs! But it's unfair to other songs that I actively listen to on my wrapped list in December.

So I wanna see if I can fix it with math because whilst I love hozier's movement it is not my fave song this year *again* Spotify.

If I play the playlist every night that is 365 days a year. Rounding down for missed nights where I can't play it or I forget or my brain is happy with a different playlist rn so don't change it and fall asleep, that's 350.

The playlist contains 350 minutes of music (okay that's spooky), and plays for 30 minutes each night. It's set to random so theres no solid way to say how much each song gets played so let's estimate.

30 X 350 = 10500 minutes where music could be played. Assuming songs are played evenly by Spotify in the randomised, that's 30 plays for each song a year.

Hozier's movement was played 87 times this year according to Spotify, so if we remove 30 of those plays, we're down at 57 times.

If only Spotify gave me how many times every song was played on the playlist that would be such an easy fix. [Stats fm would do it but to see individual counts I need to buy it and I want like, one thing, I'm not paying]

If we assume an exponential decrease in plays across the playlist (with a minimum of 31), then we can estimate the play numbers and rejig the playlist. (Can't see what 100+ songs actually are but oh well.)

Using math I will build the true top songs of 22 list! But I need excel to make the graph so I'll leave it here for now and rebagel with my new playlist later.

#Spotify #wrapped #date manipulation #so many assumptions #so little data #but this was fun #(for me) #music #i love Hozier but there's other artists i love more so sorry not sorry

[futurelacy]

so i've been following u for awhile now P and u seem to have such a good head on ur shoulders and the fact that ur a virgo tells me you'll keep it real w me and probably give good advice. So i've been talking to this guy and we get along so well and everything has been so fun and we have deep conversations and its heading into the we're gonna be official very soon phase. But recently i was scrolling thru insta and i saw this insta model and just randomly decidedly to scroll thru her feed and i saw his like on a bunch of her thirst trap pics in lingerie where her ass and tits are out. And now i'm seeing his like on a bunch of other insta model pics as well ranging from barely dressed thrist traps to selfies. And its giving me the ick am i sabotaging a good thing for myself? Idk if he's still liking pics like that on insta and my ego is too big to ask but its also killing me ahhh idk what to do. Help a girl out pls and keep it 100% real w me am i overreacting bc technically he was single when he liked them and i haven't seen his like on a girls pics since we started seeing each other more frequently and stuff became more real w us but idk if he still does that rn. The thought of him still liking girls pics makes me wanna run cause he should respect me but he is technically single rn so i dont even know if i have any solid ground to stand on.

Hiii okay so first of all, I find this to be a somewhat tricky situation you’re in. Y’all are in the talking stage as in he’s not your boyfriend yet, correct? Because my initial thought was to casually bring it up in conversation and see how he reacts. I’m always for honest and open conversation I feel like it can resolve a lot. By explaining your point of view and saying something like “um this is making me uncomfortable. Am I overthinking?” you could get a response from him directly that would save you from overthinking the issue. Make sure to tell it from ur perspective without accusations. “I feel like… or this is making me feel…” could be helpful starters. A good conversation goes a long way. Communication is so important. But I completely understand if you don’t want to bring it up. I also totally understand why it’s bothering you. On the other hand, think about it this way: it’s an Instagram model, right? Not someone he knows personally. Chances are very low he’ll run off with her because he liked her pictures lol. Also to be blunt, dudes can be simple creatures, they see some ass and tiddies and go “nice!” And hit the like button lol. It’s probably meaningless and he just happened to like the posts bc he thinks she’s attractive. Do you think it would bother him if you liked pics of shirtless men on Instagram? I just think that trust and open communication is super important, also while entering a new relationship. I wouldn’t consider this a red flag though bc we don’t know if he still likes the pics… but make sure you feel comfortable around him and as soon as you feel insecure I’d maybe try and have a conversation. As for now, maybe test the waters by bringing it up casually. Don’t let it get to you too much! And good luck 💕

[renegadeontherunn]

@city-of-fae​ LISS OKAY I STARTED ANSWERING YOUR ASK AND TUMBLR GLITCHED AND ATE IT I’M SO SORRY UGHHHH BUT ANYWAY

!!!!!! YOU ARE CERTAINLY NOT THE ONLY ONE!!! OBI AND SOKA CONSUMES ME SOMETIMES AND THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TIMES!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH YES!!!!! and thank you so much for the ask that tumblr was very mean to!!!!! let me go listen--

the song in question

OH MY GOD

ONE SECOND I'M JUST OVER HERE SOBBING GAHHHHHHH THIS SONG!!!! oh MAN this song in the context of obi-wan and ahsoka????? AND POST-ROTS????? GODDDDDD OKAY YES YES YES ABSOLUTELY LISS YOUR MIND--

awake, awake, you children bold / take hold of all your books and fold / the corners, they warned us / a storm is coming on

this is an AMAZING start to this song given the context of post-rots. it really gives me the feeling of yeah waking everyone up and frantically whispering get up, get up, grab your stuff we have to go which just gahhhh yes reminds me a lot of obi-wan and ahsoka having to leave behind everything in the wake of anakin's "storm coming on." and, of course, "children bold" is very ahsoka and obi-wan would tell her to take her books that's so :'))

what do you mean you've lost your scarlet welly boots? / do y'know what they cost? / wear a raincoat or it'll soak you to the bone

okay again, I can see this scene so clearly in my head, they're rushing around searching for all their stuff and ahsoka's like "obi-wan I can't find my boots" and it's all very much parent scolding child in a hurry/panic but then still turning around and saying "make sure you wear a raincoat, here take mine" and again that is very much obi-wan and ahsoka to me!!

and I love you, don't you know / that I'll be with you all along, as long as you are kind / to those who are not strong and cannot find their scarlet welly boots

I feel like this really captures an essential of obi-wan's teachings to ahsoka: be kind, help everyone you can, remember when you were in that situation, "teaching is a privilege, it's part of a Jedi's responsibility to help train the next generation," etc etc and also just the "I love you, don't you know / that I'll be with you all along" godddd thinking about that with obi and soka is mAKING ME SOB

cause when it's cold / I'll wrap my scarf around you / and when it's hard / I'll place your head into my hands

yes. yes yes yes yes this!!! this right here is obi-wan and ahsoka!!!! I'm sobbing

and when you scream that it's not fair / it's like I've gone off to the coast / left you behind just standing there / pretending not to see your ghost / if only you could hear my voice / but you are screaming far too loud to hear me swear / just because I left doesn't mean I'm not still there

goddddd okay yes, I think this can be seen through a few different contexts, definitely post-rots and also deception (oUCH OUCH OUCH) like you said, and also I think this works for post-s5. just all the times where obi-wan and ahsoka were separated and this is just. ouch ouch ouch. but yeah this part with deception??? such a good angle, ahsoka screaming it's not fair, but obi-wan saying I'm still here. ugh. pain

I get to watch you grow up now / and make me proud / make all of the mistakes that make me laugh / oh, darling, lord, how you make me laugh / . . . / cause you were always strong / when you were young, you'd kick things just to see if they would fall

I'm sobbing. liss, I'm sobbing. this! this is so obi-wan looking at ahsoka when she was a padawan. I think she really really brought a source of light and hope to both his and anakin's lives during the war and their characters are just so good together bc she's a lot like anakin ("you'd kick things just to see if they would fall"), but not nearly as weighed down as either of them (at least not until the end), and like. they are just :'))))) they! are! father! and! daughter!!!!

they said "that girl, she's wrong" / but I'll stick up for you / even though you haven't got a clue

the wrong jedi. that's all I'm gonna say. just. the wrong jedi

actually, that's not all I'm gonna say KJASJKDLADKLJS bc I have a lot of conflicting feelings and thoughts about obi-wan's involvement in the wrong jedi arc and since we got basically nothing in the actual show (because d*sney is a bunch of cowards) it all sort of has to be conjecture. but anyway, I think that obi-wan did stick up for ahsoka as much as he could and I really want to believe that he was right beside anakin defending her and like really trying to prove her innocence, but what we're shown in the show is. not that and I've seen a lot of really like solid and well-informed posts about how a big part of obi-wan's characterization is that he is someone who lets go and I can't find the one I'm thinking of rn but also like. idk it is shown how conflicted he is during that arc. plus, how much could they have even taken obi-wan's opinion into account bc it's nearly impossible for him to be unbiased?? like he's her grandmaster!! idk and that is NOT what this post is about ajskdkljdsa, but basically. yes. yes this is obi-wan in the wrong jedi.

and I'm so proud of you

screaming, crying, throwing up. GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

and when you scream "I'm not alright" / and throw my picture at the wall / "you were supposed to be my light / and keep me safe against them all / how could you leave me here?" you'll scream / . . . / you'll say "I've been so scared / you left me here behind / do you not care? / how the fuck am I supposed to carry on without you here?"

this! this is so so so much deception, post-s5, post-rots, all of this!!!! this is ahsoka confused and angry and hurt and betrayed and homesick and I'm going to SOB. I don't have much more to say about this line, just. yes. yes yes yes this

you'll miss me, oh jesus christ, you'll miss me / just as much as all those years ago, and you'll look up at the storm

okay yes this is definitely reminding me of post-rots ahsoka looking back on deception and post-rots obi-wan looking back on the wrong jedi both of them missing the other, both of them knowing what it feels like to lose each other and be separated and just having that happen again and again :(((

just when you're about to give up every hope you have, you turn around / perched by the stairs, someone's gone and left behind / a brand new pair of scarlet welly boots

this hits me SO HARD. it is so so indicative of obi-wan and ahsoka still being around post-rots even though they both think the other is gone (which is just. so heartbreaking I can't) but they both still have their memories of each other and what they've taught each other and I think that they really do live on in each other's lives after revenge of the sith and they both have the task of keeping anakin's memory alive and ensuring safety and happiness for other people and while their lives and missions are very different, they both are still trying to do the same thing and they still have that connection and I just. I sob.

I love them so much and this song is perfect for them thank you for introducing me to it!!!!!! I will never be over this song with them gOD

#fiona speaks #this song???? with them???? #S O BB I N G #UGH IT'S JUST SO GOOD #you are so so right to associate this song with them it is PEAK obi and soka #i adore them so much #gOD THIS SONG #JUST. YES #LISS YOUR MIND #UGHHHHHH IT'S SO GOOD I DON'T HAVE ANY OTHER WORDS LEFT I JUST HAVE THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS AND GAHHHHHH #THIS IS SO SO GOOD #obi k & soka #obi wan kenobi #ahsoka tano #them :')) #father! and! daughter! they are!!!!! #star wars #liss tag! #answered #technically even though tunglr is a functional website #but yes #yes yes yes #thank you so much for this ask i LOVE this song with them and talking about this you are FANTASTIC

[tsukishumai]

Hii :") I'm kinda new to Tumblr so idk how these things work but I read a few of the confessions (and basically your entire blog) and went "cam such a sweetheart 😭😭" so yeah here's a confession HAHA

So I've been best friends with this girl from my class since like,, early last year? But this year I kinda feel like we're drifting which makes me rlly sad :( I've never actually had solid friendships my entire life and she actually made me feel like I was worth having a best friend ;-; we literally did everything together last year, and yeah I guess 1½ years of friendship isn't rlly considered THAT much, but I'm kinda sad that we're not hanging out as much nowadays.

I mean, I get that we don't HAVE to be next to each other 24/7, and that it's great we have our own friends other than each other! But to me, she's the only one I feel 100% myself with (platonically ofc HAHA). And I guess seeing her being like really really close to other people kinda makes me insecure?? Like, I can't help but think "is she ignoring me?" Or "am I too boring to be her friend?". Idk if I'm the only one facing something like that - I'm probably not - but it sure feels like it sometimes smhh

JAJWMDJC I sound so depressed I'M SORRYYY I HOPE I DIDN'T RUIN YOUR DAY

PS: I'm dying to read love galore (and it looks so damn good) but like I have so much BS going on in my life rn anjwndjjcjf I'm definitely saving it to read another time tho ;)

ANYWAY HAVE A GREAT DAY CAM, YOU'RE A SWEETHEART AND I LOVE YOUR BLOG <3 *spams heart emojis*

Hi sweet pea! welcome to this hellsite i guess lmao im sorry u ended up here :') jkjk but thank u thats so sweet of u （˶′◡‵˶）

aww love you have such a big heart!! i'm really sorry to hear that you and your friend are drifting apart :/ but i'm trying to find the kindest way to put this...

to be honest, this is just a part of life! not everybody is meant to stay in your life forever, and that's okay. as you enter different stages in your life, you'll find that not all relationships follow you, but sometimes, it's to make space for all the beautiful new ones to be made with people you haven't met yet.

of course, it's normal to grieve the loss of a connection, specially one that was so strong and deep. but just because it fades away, does it mean it wasn't special? does it negate all the memories you made and things you've shared with that person? of course not! that friendship will remain with you always, even if that person does not. and she taught you one very important thing; that you ARE worthy of being best friends with someone! and that's something you should remember always (: and you're definitely not alone, EVERYONE has gone through something like this TRUST ME.

but i think the best lesson to learn early on is how to let go. the door doesn't have to be closed, but you don't need to be waiting around by the threshold waiting for someone to come back.

it's okay to move on, to make different friends, and form those connections with other people. life is all about making bonds with others, and the bonds that only lasted for a year or so are just as important as life long bonds <3

im sorry if this didn't help but its going to be ok my love i promise!

#ps theres no pressure to read love galore hahah #anon! #confessions to shumai

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: [obviously it's actually ages later so she clearly isn't coming back but it's also enough time that we can pretend we're fine and joke about it and that she might not reply until even later cos christmas so we feel safe to just be like nbd lol] Jimmy: *g2g Jimmy: or piss off would've worked an' all Jimmy: far as a christmas classic goes Janis: yeah, they was up Janis: you know how it goes from there Janis: didn't reckon comparing notes was gonna be any more thrilling than living it, yeah? Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: [a picture of Bobby timestamped to show how early he actually was up like yep] Janis: Ouch Janis: how buzzing was he then Janis: 😀 😃 😄 😁 😆 😅 😂 🤣 scale Jimmy: off it Janis: 👍 Jimmy: Where was his best mate on the scale? Janis: pretty solid and manic 😆 Janis: bit of a wobble when she had to eat her lunch and stop playing with all the shit she got Janis: but what's 😂 without some 😭 Jimmy: #same obvs Jimmy: might just be Ian's cooking making me 😭 though Janis: I'll let her know Janis: feel well reassured and #seen Janis: Sharon didn't show? Jimmy: I know, mate we're all 💔 by her empty chair Jimmy: my mum neither, funnily enough Jimmy: pisstaking lack of miracles about Janis: We did see Jesus and Santa out on it so Janis: lads aren't on top form Jimmy: if he hadn't drank the 🥛 she might've appeared, needing a bit for her ☕ Jimmy: SUCH a selfish dickhead Janis: spin the trope on it's head Janis: clever Janis: could've been picking up more 🚬 too Jimmy: she left them behind, as NYE resolutions go 🚭 is a bit cliche but Jimmy: you crack on, Debbie Janis: far as parting gifts go Janis: so so at best Jimmy: Dunno I were chuffed with it Janis: of course, birth of 😎 boy Jimmy: weren't like I could follow in her footsteps out the door Jimmy: piss poor #originstory that Jimmy: have to fake it Janis: #relatable Jimmy: Duh Jimmy: when ain't we on the same page? Janis: have to 🤞 they'd never put this shit to paper Janis: poorly written fanfic and a netflix original that tanks, fine Jimmy: what could be more #goals? Jimmy: ✔✔ Janis: nothing, obviously Jimmy: 🖋🩸 it is then Janis: can sell my soul no problem Janis: good luck cashing that one in boys Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: any organs going Jimmy: won't be doing receipts, goes without saying Janis: careful how you word that one Janis: get a bit #metoo Jimmy: open to a bit of castration, since you asked Janis: Christmas does remind you of why not to have kids, right Jimmy: if nowt else Jimmy: can't all be Libis 💔 Janis: if you wanna chat to her form an orderly queue behind your brother, like Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: 2nd choice AGAIN Janis: who else put you 🥈? Jimmy: who HASN'T, babes 😭😭😭 Janis: oh, always the bridesmaid Janis: very you Jimmy: bit weird in this context, don't reckon we can marry off kids or spread about that I wanna wife up Libi so I were avoiding it but Janis: if the baby pink/lilac dress fits darling Jimmy: baby pink like my 😳 OBVS Jimmy: can't have a clash Janis: bad enough you're the oldest and fattest, christ Jimmy: way to drag me by my unflattering weave, hun Janis: Hate for you to make a show of yourself Janis: say these things for your own good 😘 Jimmy: tah Jimmy: I get waiting til your nan is more pissed but don't forget to secure my child bride for tomorrow 😘 Janis: They said yes already Janis: leaving out your intentions, obviously Janis: not that keen to get rid of her Jimmy: we're all chuffed she ain't gotta go in the boot Janis: radio and sweets should suffice in shutting her up Janis: for a bit, anyway Janis: no miracles occurring here either Jimmy: again #same Jimmy: so much in common, me and her Janis: sorry but no one is gonna ship this one Jimmy: PROPERLY starcrossed, what a dream Jimmy: off you fuck, tah Janis: rude Janis: and you won't be able to kidnap her without my help so at least keep me on side 'til then, moron Jimmy: challenge accepted Jimmy: know where she lives and how to shut her up so Janis: yeah, but you don't know how to call off her KILLER dog Janis: checkmate, asswipe Jimmy: I'll have a google, be alright Janis: get your face ripped off, please Janis: get rid of the need for any of this Jimmy: SO romantic, you Jimmy: I'll miss you Jimmy: but bit rude if you ain't allowed to get married without a face Jimmy: bet the tories sorted that Janis: like fuck Janis: your outside'll just reflect the monster within Janis: easier to 🔎 even for the idiots about this way Janis: she'll get saved in no time and you'll get to be behind bars like you wanna ⛓💘 Jimmy: LITERALLY can't deal with these compliments rn tbh Jimmy: or that happy ending Janis: 💦 comes but once a year Jimmy: get your 🧠💭💕 off 🎅 it's OVER, Jodie Jimmy: he's already forgotten you Janis: he's literally all I've got Janis: fuck you Jimmy: delete your 📞 history and move on Jimmy: you've got the 🎁🎁 lads are good for nowt else Janis: I believe, thanks Janis: unlike you you bitter cow Jimmy: UGH, get a grip, babes Janis: 🤢 this is far too much like talking to actual Gracie Jimmy: won't insist on a 🏆 Jimmy: nowt challenging about doing a decent impression of any of 'em Janis: bit rude you've faked being impressed before now then Jimmy: for me, I'm a well better actor than you, girl Janis: if you reckon that then my job here is done Janis: all the 🏆🏆 for me Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: yeah, that kinda day Jimmy: you gonna turn this one around for me an' all? Janis: is that what you want? Jimmy: isn't that what you want? Janis: if you're saying I reckon I always can, like a saviour complex, then nah Janis: but if you're just asking if I still want to see you, then, yeah Jimmy: if either of us would have a complex like that, it's gotta be me as a white lad, come on Janis: alright Janis: I'll come Jimmy: alright Janis: I know today is shit Janis: we don't need to pretend otherwise Jimmy: didn't reckon we were Janis: yeah Jimmy: ? Janis: It is a stupid question Janis: but aside from the obvious, are you alright? Jimmy: are you? Janis: Yeah, pretty much Janis: so what's wrong? Jimmy: how much of the obvious are we putting aside? Janis: that the kids would be a bit gutted about your mum and the food and craic from your dad would be a bit shit Janis: in a nutshell Janis: so go on Jimmy: I'll live Janis: you don't wanna tell me, do you Jimmy: nowt to tell, it's shit, you already said it Janis: okay Jimmy: if you can believe in 🎅 you can take my word for it Janis: I am Janis: okay means 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: we don't need to have an entire 👌👍 back and forth Janis: I'll 💬 when I'm close and you can keep being alright Jimmy: you started it, mate Jimmy: don't be a spoilsport Janis: go on then Janis: have your fun, it ain't mine Jimmy: 🗨  to me dickhead Janis: talk back to me Jimmy: I am Janis: not properly Janis: it's gone funny again Jimmy: what do you want me to say? Janis: I don't know Janis: just what you want Jimmy: I never said I were any good with words Janis: I'll survive Janis: let's just be Janis: like normal, business as usual Jimmy: I thought you were gonna write business casual, like there's an Ian approved dress code Jimmy: 🤏 gutted Janis: I have forgone the glitter and fur Janis: though I doubt he'd be as buzzing as shit nan, couldn't risk that faux pas again Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: he'd be chuffed to bits if you were wearing that, no funny business Janis: for the throwback of it all or Jimmy: you're right, loads of people have 👀 the 📷 Jimmy: you CAN'T Janis: if he slid into the gals DMs with the goss you could 🚨 Jimmy: ootd not outfit of the DAYS Jimmy: 👮🚔 Janis: oi, arrest him, not me Janis: you never said you were strictly fashion 👮 Jimmy: fine, if you don't wanna drive off into the sunset with me Jimmy: offering you a getaway car here Janis: the cars with me Jimmy: if Libi's not in the boot I ain't interested, soz Jimmy: you were told Janis: 🙄 Janis: you'll have to wait and see Janis: and be disappointed Jimmy: if you're wearing that pisstake of an outfit again, yeah Janis: I told you I ain't Janis: never again Janis: 🔥 Jimmy: did you? Janis: yeah Janis: [pictures of a jolly xmas fire with that melting all over the shop lmao] Jimmy: bit rude of you not to invite us Janis: I would if I could Janis: there's plenty more to burn Jimmy: 🎄 jumpers for a start Janis: exactly Janis: see if 💀#2 wants to put her diary on Jimmy: we could do it here 🤞 the whole house'd go up Jimmy: have to move then Janis: that would be win win Janis: death or a fresh start Jimmy: not enough drama for Bill but never is Jimmy: can't win with his 👻 Janis: he'd have you picking who to save Janis: always so EXTRA Janis: take a day off, Billy Jimmy: dead easy answer Janis: Sister can save herself, fuck the dog, so the kid? Jimmy: it's obvs you so the 🎭 can go ON and ON and ON 💔🎻😭 and owt else Janis: ugh Janis: my hero Jimmy: Bill makes the rules, babe Jimmy: @ him 👏👏🌹 Janis: lemme think of a sonnet first Janis: got to win him back 'round Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: don't offer to help then Janis: lazy Jimmy: why would I want you in his good books? Janis: what's good for me is good for you Jimmy: you can only have the one 👻 boyfriend at a time Jimmy: it ain't nowt but 👎 for me to get dumped for a more 🥇🎨🖋 🎭 Janis: I've only got the one Janis: ain't nothing but the writer Janis: and his ideas usually get ignored anyway Jimmy: ❌ Jimmy: oh Bill Janis: you don't have to feel bad for him Janis: is trying to steal me Jimmy: can't blame him for having a go Janis: far as  🧛 fake girlfriends go Jimmy: 🥇🏆💪 far as muses go Janis: I wasn't expecting half as many of the pub crawl pics to come out Janis: and that's not sounding surprised again Janis: just that the 🥴😵 wasn't too real Jimmy: you're that dickhead who looks #goals even with the 📸 on Janis: you make me look good Janis: #talent Janis: #skillz Jimmy: it's nowt to do with me Jimmy: you just look Janis: yeah well Janis: we're #goals by default 'cos you're not ugly yourself Janis: half of 'em probably think they're doing charity work or something 🦐🦑 Jimmy: tis the season Jimmy: 💀👑 must be 💔 she can't get back on it Janis: looks great on a CV Janis: but daddy hasn't thought about that Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: kicking himself when he realises she's already too thick for Trinity Janis: God ONLY knows where she'll end up now Jimmy: 🤞 for the north OBVS Janis: 🤔 Janis: Leeds? Janis: I'll float the idea to her Jimmy: fit right in, her Jimmy: no need to ever leave Janis: SO happy for her and her new Northern life Jimmy: chuck you an oscar in a bit Janis: you got me another prezzie? Janis: you shouldn't have 🤗😘 Jimmy: can't help myself Janis: 🎅 energy Jimmy: just wanna be the 🎅 you deserve 💕 Janis: awh, don't make us cry Jimmy: 🚗 or 🏃? Janis: 🚗 Janis: why not Jimmy: alright 🚫😭 Janis: Considerate Janis: all you know I'm already ten sheets to the wind Jimmy: I'd know Janis: alright 👮 Jimmy: give yourself away ages before I got you to do any blowing, pisshead Janis: piss off would I Jimmy: weren't a challenge Janis: didn't say it was Janis: not bringing a bottle, obviously Janis: don't wanna make friends with him do I Jimmy: could've given it to me Janis: if it's a requirement I'll keep driving, dickhead Jimmy: if it were a requirement I'd have said before now Janis: then shh Janis: I might've got you something Jimmy: weird coincidence, that Janis: you did? Janis: almost like it's a holiday or something Jimmy: Dunno, sounds fake to me, that, mate Janis: what did you get me then Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: 😣 Janis: mean Jimmy: come here and open it Janis: if it's your dick in box I'm gonna be a 🤏 unimpressed Jimmy: 🎀 Janis: gift wrapping skills leaving nothing to be desired Janis: got it Jimmy: [a picture of this wrapped gift like how rude look how beautiful it is] Janis: don't be a tease again Janis: I'm already driving fast as I can Jimmy: only be a tease if didn't give it you Jimmy: actually for Libi, soz like Janis: she's had enough Janis: take it even if it's another cuddly toy Jimmy: I ain't giving you no clues Janis: not even if I 🥺 Jimmy: go on Janis: [does but obviously it's very pisstakey] Jimmy: 👏👏🌹 Janis: is that a clue Jimmy: might be Jimmy: might just not fancy you 💀💀💀 from the lack of attention before you get here Janis: very possible Janis: so like me Jimmy: can't take the risk Janis: all the 💪🥇 heroics for you Jimmy: tah Jimmy: nowt to do with being a dickhead who needs you to do owt Janis: 'course not Jimmy: #notallsantas Jimmy: but crack on through the 🌨 to bring me my Jimmy: 🎁 Janis: does this mean I'm an elf Jimmy: you're poor exploited rudolf and I'm your dead keen missus Jimmy: we've switched Janis: 😱 Jimmy: crack on and save me an' all Jimmy: would call this house a prison if I were a dramatic sort of reindeer lass Janis: I doubt you're being treated to such stunning musical numbers whilst you sit and rot though Janis: actually be right there, like Jimmy: you gonna sing for us? Janis: also how you know I'm not that drunk Janis: no karaoke now Jimmy: not even if I 🥺 Janis: 😏 Janis: we'll see Jimmy: [obvs does because always that bitch] Janis: [just assuming your xmas injury is not visible?] Jimmy: [I'm gonna say no so that the bubs won't know when we go to skerries because that's feelsier] Janis: [I vibe] Janis: okay, pretty convincing Jimmy: always sounding so 😱 you Janis: I might've forgotten what you looked like Jimmy: either that's bollocks or what you said a bit ago about my #goals face were Janis: you decide Jimmy: 👌 Janis: maybe I'm just saying it's been ages Jimmy: not denying that Janis: then take the compliment Jimmy: if we're telling each other what to do, shut up and drive Janis: 1. you always try and tell me what to do 2. what do you think I'm doing, you shut up Jimmy: 1. when do I? 2. pissing about Janis: literally constantly, no way I could narrow it down to a few examples Jimmy: convenient, that Janis: well bossy Janis: #bossbabe Jimmy: OI 👏 do 👏 you 👏 wanna 👏 buy 👏 the 👏 shite 👏 off 👏 my 👏 facebook 👏 OR 👏 WHAT? Janis: Honey, you're in a pyramid scheme Janis: and the lipsticks are shit 💁 Jimmy: 💰 on that being what pub crawl Sharon or Karen 💋 me with Jimmy: might've woken up with no face and your #ultimatekinkunlocked Janis: never gonna sell 'em so she may as well get some wear out of 'em Jimmy: #entreprenher Janis: 🤢 Janis: #dirtyoldcow Jimmy: 🐑 or nowt for this lad Jimmy: and she weren't even blonde! Janis: honestly, who does she think she is Janis: walking 'round like she's 👸🏼 Jimmy: *👰🏼 Jimmy: I'm a good catholic boy now 🚫💍🚫💋 Janis: 🤞 you've just made my nan drop down dead somewhere Jimmy: merry christmas, my dear Jimmy: 👍✔⚰ Janis: best present ever 😍😍 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: what did you get anyway Janis: fun was watching everyone struggle to get me anything without hint or direction Jimmy: mine were Ian not bothering to surprise us with 🐱🐭🐹🐰 or 🐢🐍🦎 to go with the 🐕 no dickhead asked for Janis: Such a read of poor Twix Janis: never again Jimmy: the one favour she's done us Janis: * I read 😇 Jimmy: he wants to bring her tomorrow Jimmy: 🤞🚫🐕 allowed Janis: plenty of places we can go that are only fake dog friendly Janis: but likewise, loads we can go where she can as well Jimmy: where do you want to? Janis: where do you wanna Jimmy: that's not an answer Janis: I don't care, s'not about me Jimmy: or me Janis: well we can't just let them decide or fuck knows what hell we'd end up in Jimmy: go on then Jimmy: have a 💭 Janis: you too Janis: or you'll blame me if it's crap Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: but alright Janis: 😒 is permanent I know Jimmy: while I've still got a face any road Janis: we'll see how far the chemical burn can drive your rating down Jimmy: it won't with you, nowt else matters obvs Janis: won't run my rating down, or won't change my # of you? Jimmy: hang on, your rating ain't the same as your #s?! 😱 Janis: oops, I meant scale of #1-#10 Jimmy: don't matter, we're 💕 face or no face Janis: if you wanted sympathy, a well good breakup where I look like a total bitch Janis: and you don't need to fake no terminal illness Jimmy: be a bit rude Janis: could work Janis: though the sympathy sex DMs might get out of control for the gals that can stomach it Jimmy: you're really not convincing me this is even a 🥉 plan Janis: I was just thinking of myself, ngl babes Janis: the only lads who would bother me would be the ones that like mean girls, so at least I could still piss on 💀👑's parade and steal all her victims Jimmy: 👍 Janis: is that a 🤝? Janis: 👍 Jimmy: if it were I'd have said it were Janis: ugh Janis: fine Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: do it whilst you still can Janis: melty face Jimmy: 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 Janis: oh you Jimmy: highlight of my day, that Janis: I know that's saying fuck all so Jimmy: 🎻🎻'll say it for me Jimmy: should probably 😭 while I can an' all Jimmy: brb Janis: where you going? Janis: I'll be there soon Jimmy: not telling you where I 😭 Janis: 🙄🙄😑 right Janis: carry on Jimmy: I'll dry my eyes before you get here, nowt to worry about Jimmy: back to 😎🚬 business as usual Janis: thank god Janis: not the kind of 'pleased to see me' I'm after Jimmy: 🔧🔨🪓🔪 I know Janis: be well rude if you'd forgot Jimmy: haven't had chance to smack myself round the head with any of 'em yet, you're alright Jimmy: nowt but a dream Janis: don't worry Janis: about to be a reality Jimmy: 🤞😍🤞 Janis: something like that Janis: am I coming in or are you coming outside Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: I dunno Janis: answer it and I'll see Jimmy: why would you wanna come in? Jimmy: the obvs answer to that one is you wouldn't Janis: Yeah, but mission piss off your dad is in full swing, hence I asked Janis: but alright Janis: obviously I'm not pulling up right outside your house in his car so come over park Jimmy: 🏃 Janis: [chilling outside this car not at all looking like you're about to do a drug deal or something] Jimmy: [chuck this 🎁 at her immediately because we're excited and also it's a distraction from how forlorn he clearly is] Janis: [poke and prod and shake it like you can work out what it is] Jimmy: [a look like open it then] Janis: [a look like don't rush me but obviously does and I cannot overstate how actually #SHOOK we'd be like idk what you're gonna say gal] Jimmy: [jimothy just gonna assume you don't like it, thanks for the self doubt Ian] Janis: ['mine's a bit shit now' like it's just a lighter but also you got that engraved we see you] Jimmy: [gesture for that gift like I'll be the judge of that thank you] Jimmy: [we know he's buzzing and is gonna use it immediately] Janis: [handing it over like you're not that bothered but clearly are, lowkey just looking through as much of the book as we can rn] Jimmy: [please do gal because he was joking about 😭 a min ago but he'd actually be emosh af rn cos the greatest gift we have ever received honestly] Janis: [when you don't even have to explain that you had it done before he did it 'cos literally last night and it's Christmas, we're all a bit emosh and overwhelmed now lmao, slayed it too hard] Jimmy: [not putting the lighter away even after his lit both of your 🚬 -which would be a moment ™ rn in each other's grill while overwhelmed af- because we're just gonna keep tracing that engraving with our fingers lowkey forever] Janis: [the amount of times we keep going to say something, like, literally no one has ever got us a gift this good, or how much we like it, or literally any of it, but we cannot 'cos it's too much so just standing here dying and smoking] Jimmy: [hard same though, they are both very much in the same boat, but add loads of blinking for him so he don't sob nbd] Janis: [when nothing is safe rn, can't speak, can't make out, just like !!! so hard, do a feelsy lean like you okay 'cos can't verbalise so] Jimmy: [obvs gonna do a feelsy lean back which hopefully won't hurt you too much boy because idk how we're hurting you this time] Janis: [yeah just let me know when it would be obvious 'cos not oblivious but don't wanna act like she's psychic and just gonna know immediately lol] Jimmy: [can you remember what injury I did when ice bath because I remember that but not what was fucking him up at the time] Janis: [it was just general body shots/potential for a broken rib moment, I think?] Jimmy: [that sounds accurate because nhs direct were like 🚭 so of course I did] Janis: [it just makes sense for where you would hit someone if you weren't going for a face moment, so potential you might of flinched then, I guess, so we're ? and out of our feels like what was that] Jimmy: [yeah like we're hiding the fact it hurts every time we breathe in so we don't have to forfeit the 🚬 and shit on your gift giving but the feelsy lean is our undoing, literally could've just not done it boy but we know you had to] Janis: [like honestly well done for getting that far it's only 'cos it was so dramatically emotional, the lowkey speed we're putting together what Bobby said, the obvious fact you were driving Ian's stolen car, like okay, so at least we don't have to ask the question, just gently holding his face 'cos can't even hug him or anything 'can I see?' like lemme assess the damage] Jimmy: [at least you would have a bit of time left to downplay how bad it is by looking at her like I'm fine before the bruises expose you because hasn't been long enough for them to fully be !!!!] Janis: [a look like, so show me then, but not as cunty as that sounds lmao] Jimmy: [I look around at the weather like do you want me to freeze to death because I love that we're communicating in looks still lol] Janis: [turning around like oh look, a car] Jimmy: [go sit in it because the weather isn't just an excuse clearly if you're gonna get snowed in tomorrow] Janis: [turn that heating on gal 'bit rude you weren't gonna seduce me' but your tone making it obvs you don't reckon you're gonna succeed at lightening the mood rn but you're alright with not making him talk about it too] Jimmy: ['bit rude of you to reckon I weren't' and a look around like is this not the perfect place to seduce you in because we will downplay this situation until the day we die so it's all nbd and we're SO FINE] Janis: [likewise looks around and shrugs 'suppose it's no less romantic than the park' and then looks out at said park and just chills in the silence for a bit] Jimmy: [we're looking too cos the mems and then eventually we're like 'come here then' as if we're gonna just hook up in this car as standard, sir your injuries] Janis: [does not] Jimmy: [nudges her like excuse you but you know that's gonna make you flinch if the feelsy lean did so then we're just annoyed for letting that happen again] Janis: [sighs, 'never promised I was gonna kill you today' like simply not in this state, and then is looking around again for something, before taking off our hoodie and getting out to assemble this snow pack] Jimmy: [OTT fake sigh to hide how big our genuine sigh would have been as if she doesn't know and then we're just watching her do this like ? before it becomes obvious what she's doing 'got loads of frozen sprouts at ours' because who in his fam would wanna eat them but we're not stopping her because we're hiding this from Bobby at least even if Cass knows] Janis: [just giving this to him like put it where you need it most 'you could go lay in it but you nah'd that idea before we even started' again, gentle pisstaking rn] Jimmy: [does obvs so you're gonna see anyway gal 'no I never, you never said that were your plan' likewise with our gentle pisstaking as if this is a normal day] Janis: [gestures like be my guest 'not a requirement I've gotta be on top of you' but we're looking the best we can without dramatically examining him right now and we're not happy with what we seeing, obviously] Jimmy: ['weren't a requirement for me to get my tits out either but that's what you were after a bit ago' as if she was asking him to flash her instead of trying to investigate whether he's alright or not, I lol] Janis: [IRL 🙄 at you boy 'you gonna try and tell me you're not that sort of girl now'] Jimmy: [crosses himself in the most pisstakey manner cos he's still him, however much pain he's in] Janis: [lols 'great, fake waiting 'til fake marriage now'] Jimmy: [is like 🤫 but way hotter than that emoji is obviously and then kissing her as if it's their secret] Janis: [the casual restraint we must show so it doesn't end up going too heavy here, but still, you can kiss as his face isn't injured rn, points to the heavens like, he's always watching babe] Jimmy: [a look up to said heavens like we're so #into that idea of a pervy voyeuristic god] Janis: [😏 'all about the #fans, you'] Jimmy: [shakes his head like a nerd 'don't sound like me'] Janis: [noise like hmm okay hun, after a little more silence, 'where were the kids?' we mean when Ian beat him up but up to you if he follows this train of thought] Jimmy: [shaking his head again before he can stop himself but obvs this time seriously like they didn't see anything because he does know what she means and my vibe is that whenever this happened Cass would've kept Bobby busy when the arguing started but because jimothy isn't ready to get into this whole story even though she's already worked it out he's gonna pretend he doesn't know what she's going on about and that was simply a confused headshake 'what?'] Janis: ['where are the kids now, like?' like what they up to, how'd you sneak out vibes, not 'cos you wanna pretend that's what you said all along but you understood if nothing else that he heard you and he doesn't wanna talk about however he understood what you said so we changing the subject] Jimmy: [nods in the direction of his house literally over the road 'can probably see 'em pissing about with all the shit he's bought from here' because we know that's the only parenting Ian does honey] Janis: [nods because we understand this type of parenting too, even if that isn't actually all that ruster do but you know 'gonna take weeks to get rid of all the fucking wrapping paper at ours'] Jimmy: [flicks his lighter she got him on and off 'you'll have a right laugh doing that' because we know she loves the one we gave her too] Janis: ['another good idea' and going to switch out his snow pack 'is it helping a bit?'] Jimmy: ['full of 'em, me' because we can't even with people taking care of us because when does that ever happen but it is helping so we've gotta add 'but you do alright yourself an' all'] Janis: [shrugs like it's the literal least we can do 'cos we think other people would probably have something to say or whatever rn and we don't 'you had any painkillers yet?'] Jimmy: [mimes drinking but that's clearly a pisstake because you'd know if he was drunk rn and is about to say something but actually does 🥱 because hasn't had any sleep which would hurt so thank god for this snow actually working so it's bearable] Janis: [back at it with this snow pack like we're anticipating that, before rummaging round in this car looking for some pills, gonna say there's none, at least he lives more central than you gal, looking at him like hmm 'you should go lay in the back' like get comfy whilst I run to the shops 'shame Helena isn't actually a dealer, though'] Jimmy: ['bit weird if you drove all this way to watch me sleep, Joanne' but does go to get comfy because why not tbh but because he's him he's pulling her along with him like I only will if you come and lie with me 'or in the boot' imagine if she just popped up like hey LOL] Janis: ['what are you gonna do about it?' said like a usual challenge but it simply is not, speaking of the boot reaching over now she's also in the back for the obligatory random coats and picnic blankets etc so she can cover him up so he doesn't get cold whilst having to be covered in snow as well, just tucking him in and shaking our head like oh you 'so soz I didn't kidnap any bitch for you and tie her up back there'] Jimmy: [tries to start a playfight but we simply can't so we're grumpy and forlorn but we're pretending we're gutted about the lack of kidnap only and making it OTT and fake as per 'you'll have to do' and acting like we're gonna tie her up with something but snuggling into her because we are buzzing she's here in these shit times] Janis: [just snuggling for a while, trying to make him as comfortable as possible all things considered 'I've got to get some pain relief in you before you crash' and dramatically tearing yourself away like you won't be 10 minutes or so] Jimmy: [checking his imaginary watch like no no I don't have time to crash it's alright because you simply don't want her to go even though she's literally gonna be 10 minutes lol] Janis: [pouting unintentionally 'cos likewise don't really wanna leave him like you could take the car but don't wanna drive it all over this town unnecessarily like they run license plate checks often enough to not be silly with it 'I'll get drink too, if I can, if you want' like every little helps] Jimmy: [gotta just run his thumb over that pouty lip like that's not the most distracting thing ever because if we say something we'll just be like DON'T GO!! too dramatically to even pretend is fake so we can't even talk, so soz that he can't answer a question ever at the best of times but managing to get out 'if you want' as if she's the one who needs it oh jimothy] Janis: [testing you so hard right now soz gal, 'it'll keep us warm' because you have to be at least slightly suggestive back before running] Jimmy: speaking of kidnap, my sister's coming tomorrow an' all Jimmy: can chuck the 🐕 at her soon as it starts doing our heads in Janis: 👍 Janis: we won't have to do something completely 4-6 shit then and we can blame it on her on the sly Janis: sorted Jimmy: Dunno what or where they'll all be bothered about Janis: well I have been 🤔 like you said Jimmy: go on Jimmy: what's your 🥇💡? Janis: we can kick it cliche and go to the beach Janis: but not here Janis: nan and granda got a caravan in Skerries and Libi would love showing you and Bobby around no doubt Jimmy: *#goals Jimmy: if Libi's 😁 our kid will be Janis: awh Janis: thank god they don't go to our school Janis: too much competition Jimmy: he's been going on about her all day Jimmy: don't even need #s Janis: had to wrestle my phone off her 'cos she was trying to call him midway through lunch to see if he had to eat carrots too Jimmy: the answer's he don't have to eat owt he don't want, she'd have been 💔 Jimmy: just tells Ian he's allergic to whatever it is if he starts Jimmy: he'd be well good at fake dating, oscar's in the bag Janis: honestly, coming for your job at CG next Janis: when he can reach the counter Jimmy: he can have that, they've been on at me to work tomorrow Janis: seriously Janis: who needs overpriced caffeine that badly boxing day Jimmy: what dickhead needs it any day? Janis: true Janis: but especially now Jimmy: Pete needs the 💰💰 for new 🎸 strings or some bollocks, I've told him to crack on Jimmy: 😘 Janis: he'll remember you when he's made it big Jimmy: 🤞 he'll write a song about me Jimmy: you can sing it Janis: that's cruel and unusual punishment Janis: obviously want a song written about me, not to sing about you 💔 Jimmy: you'll have to earn yours an' all Jimmy: he's no slag Janis: it is easy though Jimmy: to write a song or inspire one? Janis: to inspire one Janis: even without shifts to swap Jimmy: inspire me then Jimmy: might 🖋 you one Janis: right now I'm a bit busy getting you drugs and alcohol Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Jimmy: what are you gonna do let 💊 🥃 inspire me instead? Janis: Can you even write? Janis: I'll know if you cheat and let Bill's 👻 do it for you Jimmy: even the thickest northerner would know if Bill's 👻 had a go Jimmy: all his thees and thous Janis: that's how they talk in the countryside though Janis: I've been forced to read Wuthering Heights, tah Jimmy: bit rude you ain't written me a sonnet, living out there in the middle of nowt with all them fit 🐑 all about to act as a muse for you Janis: if it don't fit on a lighter, how am I gonna get you to see it? Jimmy: carve it into my 😎 Janis: a good idea 'til you're legally blind and I've got to train the dog more than sit and stay Jimmy: if anyone could though, mate Jimmy: obvs you Jimmy: train it to walk us into traffic and that's another job done Janis: nah Janis: shit way to die Janis: where's the fun in it for me? Jimmy: never said there were, it were you saying you were busy Janis: come on Janis: never too busy for you, darling Jimmy: walked into that like I were blind Janis: you are sleepy Janis: won't be too disappointed in you Jimmy: should've let you meet Ian, that's step mum talk if I've ever heard it Janis: financially ruining him with the divorce is just the tip of the iceberg of shit I'd be more than willing to do Janis: #fakedatethefakeboyfriendsrealdad? Janis: might be the logical next step Jimmy: if that's the tip, can't wait to hear what you're willing to do on the rest of that iceberg Janis: nothing if not dedicated to the cause Jimmy: 😍😍 Janis: I did forget how many places would be shut though Janis: there'll be somewhere Jimmy: It's alright Jimmy: come back Janis: no you need some Jimmy: I'll live Janis: how about at yours Jimmy: 💊 ✔ 🥃✔ Jimmy: not gonna get any 🏆 off Helena or her customers but Janis: yeah but, can you go in Janis: or am I Jimmy: I get it, you wanna crack on with your iceberg strategy Janis: 🛳 Jimmy: I better crack on an' all and paint you before I 🥶🌊 Janis: you better still be under those blankets Jimmy: [a picture like 👀 peeping out from those blankets] Janis: you're adorable Jimmy: come back Janis: okay Janis: but I am gonna make you feel better somehow Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: knew you couldn't resist me, Jules Janis: never said I could Janis: but you've got to resist me Jimmy: don't challenge me Jimmy: not like that Janis: Sorry Jimmy: 🎻💔😭 Janis: I know, baby Janis: so devastating Jimmy: worst christmas EVER Janis: 🥺 Janis: you would feel differently if you'd picked yourself up a 🐶 Jimmy: that'd be worst christmas ever and ever amen Janis: STOP PRAYING Janis: it's so weird Jimmy: make me Janis: 😈 Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: [show back up, lowkey grumpy you forgot it was Christmas day but we're happy to see him, checking he's comfortable and probably doing the snow pack again] Jimmy: [snuggle her because she must be cold and that's obvs the only reason okay] Janis: [get yourselves situated lads] Jimmy: [opening his mouth to say a million things like thanks, I missed you, I was only joking it's not the worst christmas ever but we don't know how to say any of them so we're just not] Janis: [putting your finger on his mouth like he said anything at all there 's'alright' like it so isn't for either of you rn but you're trying god bless Jimmy: [hitting her with some intense eye contact like I hope you can read my mind rn because all those things I wanna say are so important] Janis: [at least you can kiss] Jimmy: [you both very much need to, I couldn't be that evil] Janis: [or something is gonna come out here, I can't be held responsible lol] Jimmy: [literally same so shh for a bit please] Janis: [emotions are running hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh and not jus me character bleeding] Jimmy: [they are and that's why it's gonna be so fun that they get snowed in and so heartbreaking when she leaves] Janis: [oh the delicious drama] Jimmy: [speaking of leaving neither of you are gonna wanna go home even more than usual] Janis: [like you barely have to, just to make sure Cass and Bobby are ready and you've got to get Libi gal but yes, still] Jimmy: [damn you kiddos, we know they'd just go now if not for y'all] Janis: [when you can't leave your siblings, so sad, so rude] Jimmy: [literally didn't ask to be parents rn but we are out here becoming a family unit] Janis: [god bless, at least you're all gonna have a good time on this trip] Jimmy: [we'll make sure you do, lads, casual domestic bliss] Janis: [but seriously, is there anything else we dare to say or do rn before making you separate] Jimmy: [we should probably separate you but I don't want to lol] Janis: [at least you can message when you're separated so you'll have to say something and not just snugg] Jimmy: [give her your hoodie or jumper before she goes because she's sacrificed hers for you and you easily can sacrifice one of your layers because you only have to go across the road when you can bring yourself to] Janis: [cute selfie you don't need to take to prove you're still wearing it like 5 minutes later lol] Jimmy: [one back of him taking some painkillers, I imagine they're on his sticky out tongue in a sassy manner like we're calling her out for worrying about him when he's OBVS FINE but we're sending the pic actually so she won't worry because we care] Janis: take more than the recommended dose, tah Janis: but only double, no 💀 Jimmy: I get it, no self induced coma unless you're there to take advantage Janis: if Sandy ain't gonna Jimmy: how many oscars has she got? you should've have 'em off her Janis: has she got any? Janis: you're her biggest fan, you tell me Jimmy: it's you bringing her up Janis: sounds fake Jimmy: you'd know about that more than me Janis: Why would I? Jimmy: you're going for her oscars Janis: on my own Janis: I think not Jimmy: don't reckon they'll cut one in half for us Jimmy: and as long as I've got the #fans convinced I why would I need owt else? Janis: long-winded way of saying you'd be 🥈 Jimmy: what you thought I were done giving you 🎁s Janis: don't cheapen the actual gift, dickhead Janis: also if you aren't, gonna have to do the classic see-what's-lying-about-to-wrap so Jimmy: nowt cheap about 🥇 Janis: is if you reckon you're giving it me Janis: got to earn it or what's the point Jimmy: don't you reckon you have? Janis: don't you? Jimmy: what for? Janis: for our 💘story Janis: what else? Jimmy: not today I've not Janis: yeah you have Janis: anyway, no cunt works christmas Jimmy: you have 🚑 Janis: that's not 💘 Janis: I wanted to see you Janis: then you was fucked up, what am I meant to do? Janis: anyone would Jimmy: 🏃 Jimmy: that's what loads of people would do Janis: nah Janis: not a pussy Jimmy: 💔🧛 there weren't no 🩸 though Jimmy: next time 🤞 Janis: you might be pissing it Janis: but I'm not thrilled about that Janis: lack of a piss fetish aside Jimmy: I'll leave out the selfie one way or the other Janis: 💡 Janis: don't wanna get banned, babe Jimmy: sounds fake, that Jimmy: love a ban, me Janis: fine Janis: can you not just do an appropriately placed 🍆 sticker Jimmy: depends how massive the sticker'll go, babe Jimmy: no promises Janis: 😏 Janis: idiot Jimmy: 🚫🩸🧠 Janis: that old excuse Jimmy: no need to tell the fans it's 'cause I'm pissing it out Janis: 🤫 Janis: though no need if you plan on going live next time you need a slash Jimmy: only if the 💊🥃 really inspire me Janis: 🙄 Janis: soz we're not going away on a bender Jimmy: have to rely on you for my 🎨 then Janis: nice of you not to demote me Jimmy: here Jimmy: [whatever today's doodle the final one of this advent is] Janis: it's the last one Jimmy: don't have to be Janis: you gonna keep doing it 'til 💀💔 Jimmy: why not? Janis: not very goals if you get wrist strain Jimmy: I'll spread it about it's not 🍆 related, don't worry Janis: tah Jimmy: 😘 Janis: you'll run out of ways to draw me before long Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: ✏🖌💪 Jimmy: Oi you forgot 🖋🖍 Janis: 🖋 is Bill's 🖍 is Bobby's Jimmy: bit rude Janis: you're being the hog Janis: learn to share Jimmy: gave him the last roast potato ages ago Jimmy: just the kind of brother I am 🏆 Janis: show off Jimmy: keep your jealousy in check, I'd have given it you if you'd been here Janis: had a plate load myself, don't you worry Jimmy: sleep easy now, tah Janis: that makes one of us Jimmy: I get it, you're 😁 for tomorrow Jimmy: you and our kid both Janis: more like Libi won't leave me alone now for the same reason Janis: she basically does acrobatics in her sleep so that'll be well fun Jimmy: 💔 we can't chuck the two of 'em in a room in a bit and leave 'em to it Jimmy: 'cause he'll be as bad Janis: you're gonna have to sleep on his floor Janis: hard surface will help in the long run Jimmy: dunno how I'm explaining that Jimmy: 🦷🔦🦷 brb just checking for monsters mate, don't 😱😭 or owt Janis: duh, say you wanna go camping Janis: then he'll inevitably wanna join you and you can have the bed to yourself when he crashes Jimmy: make up your mind, Janet Jimmy: hard surface you said Janis: just rather you didn't get booted Janis: either or on where you end up Jimmy: weren't in my #ultimategoals Janis: obviously, I ain't there Jimmy: what you trying to make me 😭😭😭 for? Janis: not my ultimate goal either Jimmy: that'd be turning the 🚗 round Janis: 'course Janis: what could be more cinematic Jimmy: nowt, which is why I said it Janis: shame you don't write the scene directions Jimmy: yeah Janis: he's such a cockblock Jimmy: SUCH a slag for the tension Janis: bit rude 'cos he had them married, fucked and dead in the space of like 3 days in the OG Jimmy: what's he trying to say about us? the dickhead Janis: maybe he's trying to be more #relatable to a modern audience? Janis: he's seen the ❤s and the views Jimmy: next go round he'll do it so they never meet IRL Janis: 😱 oh god Janis: I'd kms immediately Jimmy: there you go Jimmy: job done in even less than 3 days Janis: at least I get to 👀 at you Janis: an actual fake boyfriend that doesn't exist is well 🎻 Jimmy: the 🎨 would be SO shite Janis: probably 'cos I'd have to do it myself Jimmy: nah 'cause I wouldn't be in it Janis: 😂 Janis: bighead strikes again Jimmy: Oi that's a point Jimmy: you never did sing to me Janis: shh Jimmy: go on Janis: I can't just sing at you Jimmy: why? Janis: 1. it'd be weird 2. contrary to popular (your) belief, I don't think I'm well mint at everything Jimmy: 1. you're making it weird 2. you never will with that attitude, dickhead Janis: 😑 Jimmy: *3. please Janis: let a good song come on the radio first Jimmy: as excuses go 🏆 Jimmy: know how you feel about interrupting Mariah Janis: [voice recording of us singing along to whatever festive song is on rn like there] Jimmy: 👏👏🌹 Jimmy: but none for me 'cause I never thought through how much that'd make me miss you Janis: it's hardly a lullabye but Janis: you wanted it Jimmy: dunno what's more of a pisstake 1. you not reckoning you're good at owt 2. that there's actually nowt you aren't 3. how bad I still want you here Janis: I just know what I'm good at, properly Janis: most people can sing if someone teaches you how to breathe right Janis: but the last part is mutual Jimmy: you gonna give me the bulletpoints or what? Janis: of what I'm good at? Jimmy: can't teach me to breathe properly from there, might as well Janis: I don't think nows the time for breathing exercises, like Janis: and you've seen or you'll see what I'm good at Jimmy: don't want you to crash the 🚗 girl Jimmy: why I said the breathing bit can wait Janis: 😏 Janis: but Jimmy: but Janis: I miss you Jimmy: it wasn't long enough Jimmy: tomorrow'll be Jimmy: you'll be telling me to piss off by the end Janis: maybe Jimmy: challenge accepted Jimmy: not that being a MASSIVE dickhead is, obvs Janis: obviously Janis: but you're literally competing with children so who am I gonna get sick of faster Jimmy: goes without saying won't be the 🐕 Janis: you brought her up Jimmy: missing me less already look Janis: dickhead Janis: you bringing her then? Jimmy: 🤞 Ian'll murder her if I don't Janis: that's a yeah Jimmy: how is it? Janis: you don't want her murdered Jimmy: the blame for it, but that'll be @iantaylor8 Jimmy: chuffed to bits for him to have it Janis: maybe she'll 'run away' tomorrow then Jimmy: went to live with mum, nowt to worry about kids 👍 Janis: an update on the farm classic Jimmy: 🗨 bollocks is what he's good at Janis: not going for the easy gag of saying it's where you got it from Jimmy: 🎯 Janis: should I bring Killer? Jimmy: do you want to? Janis: not really Janis: but she'd flip shit if you brought Twix Janis: don't wanna get them on the rocks already 💔 Jimmy: you're alright, I'll leave her here Janis: 👌 I'll tell her Jimmy: 👌 Janis: might have to call you up when she refuses to take my word for it Jimmy: if she has a go at me in sign she can say whatever she likes Jimmy: haven't taught her nowt that'll 💔 me Janis: we all know 💩head is pretty devastating Janis: don't need to put a brave face on Jimmy: #notallsantas Jimmy: how many times, babe Janis: how dare I forget how special you are Jimmy: SO rude Janis: Baby Jimmy: I'll forgive you, just that kind of 🎅 Janis: the kind that misses out on an opportunity to have me make it up to you? Janis: psh Jimmy: the kind that knows you will Janis: purposely won't now Jimmy: alright, then I'll have to make you Janis: look forward to seeing you try Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: let's hope so Janis: I wanted to be nice to you but now I can't on principle Jimmy: 🥺🥺🥺 Janis: stop it Jimmy: when you start being nice to me Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: you better not lose the lighter Jimmy: 😱😱 AS IF Janis: or give it away to any fucker in the smoking area Jimmy: well generous, me Jimmy: that'll DEFINITELY happen Janis: 😠 Jimmy: it's not the last roast potato, you're alright Janis: 👌 Jimmy: it is Jimmy: whatever you give me is safe with me Janis: alright, we did fairytale of new york last night Jimmy: weren't likely to forget how 🥇 I did the accent Janis: you don't take Irish and it shows Jimmy: said nowt about chucking that lighter at your head Janis: well I've got a full play to hit you with so think on, Shane Jimmy: stop flirting with me Janis: rude Jimmy: I'm trying to tell you I like my 🎁 dickhead Janis: so do I Jimmy: good Janis: Libi said tell Bobby to remember Snow Janis: it was a bit threatening tbh but leave that out Jimmy: forget Snow, forget this friendship, mate 👋 Janis: what can I say Janis: she's got priorities Jimmy: takes after you, gonna chuck me if I chuck this lighter Janis: least no fucker else is gonna reckon she's my kid Jimmy: they'll hear me 🗨 and reckon they're all mine Janis: the reality is they'll probably think they're yours and your sisters Janis: soz 🤢 Jimmy: grim up north Janis: not gonna make your sister buzzing for the day out so 🤫 Jimmy: not gonna add her into this 🗨 Jimmy: she might not wanna now the 🐕's not Janis: @ all of 'em Janis: cheek Jimmy: 💔 Janis: least you wanna spend time with me Janis: have to do Jimmy: you gonna be nice to me then? Janis: depends Jimmy: ? Janis: are you gonna be nice to me or what Jimmy: dunno what you mean Jimmy: never not nice to you Janis: 🤔 Janis: not really an answer, that Jimmy: be nice to me, you can have the same back Jimmy: how's that? Janis: when am I not nice to you is the question Janis: but alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: see, no answer Janis: I'm too nice to you Jimmy: or I were being nice by 🔥 the receipts Janis: ha Janis: go for it, not like I'm delusional like the gals and think I'm SO lovely to EVERYONE Jimmy: should've introduced them to Ian Jimmy: that's his #vibe today Janis: long as he promises to murder them Janis: ideal Jimmy: won't be able to help himself, obvs Jimmy: they make up for not being bottle blonde by looking 45 Janis: I'll tell Grace to put the right wig on Jimmy: bit of patience 💀👑 and 💀#2's will have all fallen out Janis: less evidence clean up Janis: considerate of them Janis: really are #saints Jimmy: hang about for that tutorial, you'll be well in Janis: 'scuse you Janis: I wore something girly and I've got a man Janis: literally the requirements apparently Jimmy: soz, you're right Jimmy: I were thinking about the learning experience that is Tammy's tiktoks Janis: 😂 Janis: if you think I'm dancing for you as well Janis: another thing coming Jimmy: have to do everything myself round here Janis: you love it Jimmy: one of us has to be #goals Jimmy: if you won't, it's up to me Janis: oi Jimmy: what? Janis: you take the piss Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: 🙄 Janis: not long ago you didn't like me walking, never mind 💃 Jimmy: and how mardy were you Jimmy: can't have it both ways, Jennifer Janis: you know why Jimmy: never said I didn't Janis: yeah Jimmy: I'll carry you about tomorrow if you're missing it Janis: no you won't Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: you're gonna take it easy Jimmy: 🛏⛓'s meant to be my kink not yours Janis: s'called roleplaying Janis: try it Jimmy: UGH FINE Janis: I promise you'll have a good time Jimmy: yeah? Janis: serious Jimmy: alright Jimmy: then I promise not to piss about Janis: okay Janis: are you alright? Jimmy: are you? Janis: yeah Janis: are you Jimmy: now I've seen you Janis: I mean it Jimmy: me an' all Janis: you and your lines Janis: make me 😳 Jimmy: Oi, I just said it weren't a line Janis: but Jimmy: you heard Janis: I wish I could've stayed Jimmy: do the counting for us Jimmy: til we can go Janis: I'm on it Janis: 🖕✌🤟 Jimmy: that were it Janis: well smart, like Janis: not to brag Jimmy: won't start you a # if you don't want Jimmy: I get it, loads of pressure Janis: what girl don't want a # for Christmas? Janis: #sospoilt Jimmy: [obvs does give her complimentary #s enjoy that the fans] Janis: [flirt on those socials 'cos we don't know what to really say atm] Jimmy: [take your excuse to be fake and extra because the feels are high rn] Janis: [you simply must lads, also hint about this trip like you've had it planned forever] Jimmy: [just wait for how romantic and #goals we can make it when we're snowed in lads, little do you know] Janis: [hohaha] Jimmy: [thank god we have this flirting sesh because I've had to tone what I was gonna say down so many times lol like not yet boy] Janis: [a hard same] Janis: fake you is fun Jimmy: 🤏 of a twat, I get why you like him Janis: give him my number, yeah Jimmy: didn't sound like you were shy around him, reckon you can do that yourself Janis: reckon he'll be well about me making you do it though so Janis: tah Jimmy: massive twat were what I meant to call him Jimmy: 👍✔ Janis: 😏 Jimmy: you know how Bill's 👻 feels about a love triangle Janis: technically a love square but fuck fake me Janis: no one is here for her Jimmy: bit rude to the fans Janis: she's just a boring version of me Janis: deny it Jimmy: never said I was one of her fans Janis: 😱 Janis: *sends screenshot* Jimmy: *backtracks so hard I need more 💊s to sort me out but it's alright there's nowt more goals than a lad with no spine* Janis: we 👏 love 👏 a 👏 doormat 👏 Jimmy: works for mates an' all, dunno why I were acting like I were special there Janis: fake you is well special Janis: #facts Jimmy: 😇 him Janis: gotta be a reason the DMs are so full Jimmy: there's LOADS Jimmy: could go on and on Janis: 🤤 Janis: don't let me stop you Jimmy: he is, well humble that lad Janis: SO shy Janis: scaring him with my thirst Jimmy: bit awkward but can't help it you Janis: it's cool, I can pretend I'm shy too Janis: what's more goals than pretending you have a totally different personality to catch you a man Jimmy: duh Janis: you'd know all about that 😎🚬 Jimmy: I've had a girlfriend, yeah Janis: 💔 Janis: what she pretend to be then? Jimmy: a lass who weren't a total nightmare Janis: if you're gonna pretend to be anything Janis: fairplay Jimmy: did work for a bit, give her that Janis: not the first or last to fall for it Jimmy: obvs Janis: just saying Jimmy: weren't saying you should shut up Janis: well Janis: no need to chat about it Jimmy: 👍 Janis: wasn't what I mean anyway, for starters Jimmy: you meant I weren't 😎🚬 which for starters is bollocks Janis: okay 🤓 Jimmy: you Janis: Hardly Jimmy: more chance that you're a 🤓 than me Jimmy: and loads more receipts Janis: is there fuck Jimmy: deny it all you like, girl Jimmy: I can't even read Janis: ~express~ yourself in other ways don't you Janis: I don't Jimmy: bollocks do you not Janis: only when you force me to sing Jimmy: didn't take much 🥊 Janet Jimmy: barely twisted owt of yours Janis: 'cos you couldn't, soft boy Janis: be embarrassing to watch you try Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you'd be 😳 but we both know why Janis: not what we're talking about Jimmy: is it not? Janis: you know it's not Jimmy: sounds fake Janis: never said you weren't good at that Jimmy: I'm just saying you express yourself in as many different ways as me Janis: that's just Jimmy: what? Janis: 🤷🤐 Jimmy: tah for clearing that up Janis: that's just between you and me, is what I was going to say Jimmy: weren't gonna send a tweet, you're alright Janis: shut up Jimmy: that's just between me and everyone else Janis: something like that Jimmy: that's exactly what it's like Jimmy: I've got nowt to say to any of them Janis: Me either Janis: never have, really Jimmy: I like talking to you Jimmy: don't matter what about Janis: it's alright, ain't it Jimmy: that a question or what? Janis: we're mates? Janis: that's a question for you Jimmy: do you wanna be mates? Janis: we act like it Janis: don't we Jimmy: not what I asked but Janis: yeah but you always ask questions never answer so I'm allowed to as well Janis: don't you think we do? Jimmy: I dunno what you're on about, I answer questions Janis: 😂 Janis: you don't Jimmy: bollocks Janis: go on then Janis: answer my question Janis: without asking one Jimmy: hang on, which one, are we mates or do we act like it? Janis: can you manage 2? Janis: since you do it all the time, shouldn't be a struggle Jimmy: there's nowt I can't handle, dickhead Janis: ... Janis: I'm waiting Jimmy: fuck's sake Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: dunno why I wanna be mates with you Janis: Charming as that is Janis: still counts as an answer, so I'll take it Jimmy: 😘 Jimmy: I dunno what's more charming than I don't like talking to anybody but you Jimmy: or why you'd reckon I'd say that but not wanna be mates Janis: well you're confusing and I'm thick too sometimes Jimmy: you alright now? Jimmy: 'cause having to play 20 questions would be taking the piss a bit Janis: you don't take the piss and we will be fine Jimmy: I'm not taking the piss Jimmy: I can ask a mate if they're alright, can't I? Janis: you're making me sound like I'm well high maintenance and hysterical Jimmy: how am I? Janis: acting like I asked you 1000s instead of 2 Janis: but I am fine, despite you being a bit of a dickhead Jimmy: just said playing the games would be a pisstake when you ain't even sleeping over, nowt else Janis: that mean no midnight snacks? 💔 Jimmy: 😱😱 no Janis: we've made such a mistake Jimmy: 💔😭🎻 Janis: quick, pop on a romcom Jimmy: rather you popped back in the 🚗 Janis: me too Janis: can't really head off in the dead of night or it will be obvious it's a kidnapping Jimmy: we'll go back for her in a bit, I'll live Janis: I could come back Janis: what about if your brother wakes up though Janis: you can't kip in the 🚗 Jimmy: *should Jimmy: I'll let you in Janis: yeah? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: you gonna wait for everyone to be 😴 or what? Jimmy: I can't have your fit nan fuming at me Janis: for starters, ugh Janis: but I can just come back over Janis: though I probably should give them some ~quality family time~ before I do, keep them somewhat on side Jimmy: I don't care if you don't Jimmy: but if Libi wanted some bollocks from home that meant we needed to pick her up from there it'd be a top idea for you to stay here and a 🥇💡 for you to spread that about Janis: 😈 Janis: I knew I kept you around for a reason Jimmy: bit late to kidnap Star and chuck her back at your nans, she's too high profile now, every dickhead has seen her Janis: you are to blame for that bit Janis: but that's easy Janis: kids are idiots, or suggestible, if you wanna be nice about it Janis: I'll make her remember something she absolutely NEEDS Jimmy: you're not as thick as I look Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you aren't either but I won't spread that about Janis: reputation and everything Jimmy: gotta stay #relatable to the fans, babe Janis: #attainable some would say Jimmy: they can have the cancer I've got coming my way if they're that bothered Jimmy: not having you off me though Janis: I don't want nobody else Jimmy: none of them dickheads are good enough for you Janis: I don't care about that Janis: I just want you Jimmy: have me then Jimmy: I'm doing nowt but waiting here Janis: it's well inconvenient that I keep remembering you're hurt Jimmy: I'm alright Janis: don't worry, there's plenty we can do without injuring you further Janis: and I won't make any jokes about stamina Jimmy: don't YOU worry Jimmy: you heard, I'm alright Jimmy: nowt I can't handle, I said Janis: alright Janis: sorry Jimmy: ❌ Janis: just trying to help, not overreact though so yeah Janis: ✔ Jimmy: you did help Jimmy: tah for that, I should've 🗨 Janis: nah Janis: it's nothing Jimmy: not nowt to me Janis: whatever kind of dickhead you are Janis: no call for that Jimmy: it were my own fault, no denying that Janis: still Jimmy: you're a top mate on the first day of being one Jimmy: take your 🏆 Janis: the fact neither of us has got any others right now is really showing Janis: but fuck it Jimmy: I don't want any others Janis: me neither Janis: load of cunts Jimmy: up north, here and wherever else Ian tries to drag me next Janis: you wanna be penpals, yeah Jimmy: 🖋🩸 Jimmy: and 😭 obvs Jimmy: sweat's more your shout, being SUCH an athlete Janis: I'll send you some 🧦 Jimmy: 😍😍🤤 Janis: maybe I should charge, you're right Jimmy: got in there just in time for mates rates Janis: lucky you Jimmy: 🤞😁🤞 is right Janis: you're ridiculous Jimmy: what so you don't want my 💌? Janis: you ain't gonna write to me Jimmy: it ain't my fault I can't, Jasmine Jimmy: I'll send you daily 🎨 Janis: why are we talking about this? Jimmy: you asked Janis: oh so now you can't stop with your answers Jimmy: make up your mind, my dear Janis: shut up Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: better Janis: if we're gonna talk about anything, let's talk about now Jimmy: alright Janis: well, more specifically, in a bit, when I'll be there Jimmy: go on then Janis: what? Jimmy: 🗨 something Jimmy: that'd be how a conversation works Janis: ugh Janis: just Janis: I wanna see you Jimmy: it feels like ages since you were here Janis: I know Janis: but I don't know why Janis: it always feels like that Jimmy: I think you answered it when you said you wanna see me Janis: yeah Janis: no lie Jimmy: I get it, you know Janis: yeah, you aren't that good an actor Janis: I can tell Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: I mean, I asked for this when I picked you, but I didn't ask for this Janis: what's that supposed to mean? Jimmy: what I said Jimmy: it ain't always piss easy being in over my massive head, even if I manage to make it look it Janis: you ain't Janis: the plans going exactly to plan Janis: this is just Janis: fun, yeah Jimmy: dunno how pissed I were when I last said it but you are that, and do make owt less shit Janis: you too Janis: so let's keep doing it Jimmy: I weren't saying I don't wanna Janis: Obviously Janis: I'm coming over for a reason Jimmy: alright, don't take the piss Jimmy: I had a point somewhere, I just dunno what it were Janis: I ain't Janis: you're cute Jimmy: that sounds well pisstakey, girl Janis: but you are Janis: and I like you as a mate Janis: but no shit I wanna fuck you too Jimmy: gutted you don't wanna write to me, you're actually really good with words Janis: a pisstake Janis: but warranted Jimmy: I mean it, it were like you read my mind then and 🖋 it down Janis: as long as we're on the same 📑 I don't give a fuck how stupid it sounds Jimmy: about how cute I am? OBVS Janis: deal with it nerd Janis: you're adorable Jimmy: long as you keep it between us, call me what you like Janis: I wouldn't give me free rein like that Jimmy: as challenges go, I've accepted worse Janis: 😏 Janis: won't be calling you nothing though, gotta be well 🤫 ain't we Jimmy: whisper to me then Janis: I'll try Jimmy: you're alright, I won't make you promise Janis: I don't really wanna get kicked out Janis: and whispering leads too easily into Janis: more Jimmy: I'm not chucking you out and no other dickhead can Janis: be mildly amusing 'cos he don't know I'd just be going to sleep in his car but Jimmy: you'll be staying here, he's still being fake nice to me Janis: weird Jimmy: might be if I didn't know exactly why Janis: ? Janis: or is a stupid question Jimmy: he weren't visited by any 👻s if that's what you're asking Jimmy: have to keep his guilty conscience and pending sexual harassments rolling onto the new year Janis: Good to know that treatment is exclusively for bosses who don't pay enough or give Christmas eve off Janis: Soz to all the Sharons, you're gonna have to keep on grinning and bearing it, babe Janis: trust him to be the 'cries when he's finished' cliche Janis: cunt Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: but Sharon can come for your oscar and man tomorrow when she's got him and the place all to herself so she'll be chuffed to bits if no other other dickhead is Janis: 😬 Janis: gutted to be doing him any kind of favour, obvs Jimmy: leaving the 🐕 will 💔 them Janis: nothing like dog shit to ruin the mood Jimmy: or piss or 😭 Janis: she will be devvo if she ain't invited to join in Jimmy: 🤞 she'll be gutted enough to piss off Janis: you're so rude Janis: piss off and find you, you blatantly mean Jimmy: if that were my type I wouldn't have been after rescuing at the pub Janis: are we talking about Sharon or the dog? Jimmy: either or Jimmy: both a bit easy going with their 👅 Janis: and neither cuts their own fringe so what's the point eh Jimmy: exactly Janis: 🤓🎨😍 Jimmy: won't catch either of them in overalls that's OBVS me out Janis: 😂 don't Jimmy: them lasses probably would have a go at 🚬 with a 🖍 Janis: your brother is already cooler than you, I'd keep it quiet Jimmy: you're right, they'd kidnap him Jimmy: which is only #goals when I go on about it Janis: that's dubious at best but sure Jimmy: 😏 Janis: if you ever offered to kidnap me, maybe Janis: the 💘 is 💀 Jimmy: you come too willingly, nowt I can do about that Janis: rude Janis: try making me not wanna Jimmy: you're already on your way here or will be in a bit Jimmy: picked the wrong day to play hard to get Janis: plenty of time to turn around Jimmy: don't mean I wanna give you loads of chances Janis: fair, calling me easy again was a bold enough choice to count for multiple goes Jimmy: only compliment you've ever taken to 💘 Janis: ha Jimmy: any time you'd rather I go on about what hard work you are Jimmy: just say Janis: you poor #lads just can't win, is that what you're saying? Jimmy: it'll do Janis: 😏 Janis: just know what to say and exactly when to say it, christ Janis: not hard Jimmy: 👍 Janis: real lads do have the shitty end of the deal, tbh Jimmy: wouldn't know Jimmy: only a fake lad Janis: right Janis: got the little shorts and hat and everything Janis: cute Jimmy: what? Janis: Pinocchio Janis: the look Jimmy: Dunno him or where he gets his ootds Janis: oh Janis: awkward this isn't a homage Jimmy: bit awkward for you that he ain't my mate 'cause his dad is just your type 👴💕 Janis: 🎻🎻 Jimmy: we're all 💔 I don't have #lads to go to the pub with Janis: you ain't Janis: last time I brought it up you made that clear Jimmy: that'll by why I were in character 🤥 for you Jimmy: nowt if not supportive of your kinks, me Janis: 😱 Janis: can't believe you don't respect how important the #gurlgang is Jimmy: you can be 😱 after you've respected the 🤥📏 tah Janis: you and size Jimmy: doing you a MASSIVE favour is just the kind of lad I am Janis: wow, so thankful Jimmy: 🎁's just keep coming Jimmy: 💘'll never 💀💀💀 while I'm offering my face as a seat Janis: you might suffocate though Janis: 😳 Jimmy: top of my list for how I wanna 💀💀💀 now Jimmy: gutted I never thought of it sooner Janis: easily done Jimmy: ✔ Janis: don't ✔ like that's not a mental image that could make me crash, dickhead Jimmy: it were you who were going on about turning the car round and that like that weren't gonna make me say owt I could so you wouldn't Janis: as if I was going to Jimmy: now you won't Janis: I wasn't going to Janis: but any chance to 💀💀💀 you Jimmy: any chance to let you Janis: nothing more 💘 than that Jimmy: is that a challenge or what? Janis: you want it to be? Jimmy: do you want it to be? Janis: in what world am I going to say no? Jimmy: dunno, might be a world where you don't want your big head setting off the airbag Janis: I can handle it Jimmy: [🔥🔥 sext obvs like any chance to also kill you] Janis: I Jimmy: you Janis: no, you Jimmy: you heard Jimmy: it's your fault Janis: it feels like yours Jimmy: not to me Janis: I'm alright taking the blame for how you feel Jimmy: you can handle that an' all, yeah? Janis: you don't think I can? Jimmy: never said that Janis: Good Janis: because I can and I want to Jimmy: take it then Janis: [show up gal] Janis: I'm here Jimmy: [let her in and do that trope where you just kiss her immediately and against the door when you've closed it and while you're taking off her coat] Janis: [such a romcom forever] Jimmy: [can't and won't ever resist] Janis: [we're here for it shameless rn] Jimmy: [the question is are we saying that everyone is still up and about rn or are they asleep?] Janis: [hmm 'cos either is viable depends what vibe we want to achieve here] Jimmy: [yeah and there are pros and cons to either] Janis: [it'd be rude but potentially plot-driving/fun to have her first interaction with Ian because she hasn't yet] Jimmy: [bonus points if he's like asleep on the sofa or something because what a christmas mood and they wake him up either deliberately or accidentally] Janis: [what a dad, too full and drunk] Jimmy: [literally too perfect of a cliche not to take advantage of] Janis: [you're probably not gonna want to on purpose rn because we're in a #mood but Cass should blatantly still be up even if Bobby ain't and be like DAD JIMMYS GF IS HERE 'cos lord knows she's bored rn] Jimmy: [JJ just trying to have their makeout sesh, but I'll forgive you Cass we know you're upset because your mum isn't here and you know Jimothy and Ian have brawled because even if you didn't hear or witness it that's the only time Ian is ever nice to him so] Janis: [and you're 12 so 'nuff said on all counts] Jimmy: [mhmm, soz you gotta deal with Ian's fake niceness though Janis because that's not a mood] Janis: [ew, at least shit nan is honest is nothing else, lmao, just trying to take Jimmy's lead of the vibe he wants like are we being rude or fake nice back or what 'cos nothing in it for you beyond helping him out so] Jimmy: [would not have the strength to be fake nice to you if Bobby is not around rn because only doing it ever for his sake so have fun trying to keep it up Ian when we're just getting the bae a drink from your stash and doing our best to leave you unacknowledged like we're the deaf one] Janis: [at least we can be our usual charming selves then] Jimmy: [like we can't be rude enough he'll say you can't take the kids with you tomorrow hence we're just not saying anything because temptation to just tell him to fuck off always] Janis: [just some sly shade, easily done, also I hope you didn't come looking like a hoe 'cos assumptions that are lowkey a bit racial already being made without doing that] Jimmy: [we all know he isn't gonna like you no matter what gal, we'll get out of there as soon as we can honestly] Janis: [how dare you, but no, we would not want you to like us, we know your game hun] Jimmy: [it'll be fun af when we lowkey move you in and it's just 24/7 piss off Ian time] Jimmy: [but for now take the bottle and run lads] Janis: [soz that didn't work Cass but you know] Jimmy: [Jimothy needs this rn, soz you don't have your bf yet but you'll understand when you do] Janis: [you'll get your whole squad soon] Jimmy: [we'll all be living our best lives but for now we're just trying to survive the festive season so] Jimmy: [it makes me happy to know that Janis' arrival will have wound Twix up so you won't be able to just go back to sleep Ian] Janis: [go take that poor dog for a piss sir] Jimmy: [because we are not doing it, we're going upstairs good day] Janis: [buh-bye] Jimmy: [boy just downing however much drink was in his glass as he goes cos fml and also we've spent an age pretending we're not physically hurting which is not a mood either] Janis: [actually needed, so you can't say nothing Ian] Jimmy: [hopefully you left all your presents downstairs cos your room isn't very big and we don't need them everywhere] Janis: [and Bobby is in his bed, we gotta lay that boy down like get comfy] Jimmy: [the biggest sigh in the world, imagine] Janis: [copying him but laying down next to him carefully so we don't squash him] Jimmy: [going to write on her but we don't know what to say so we're just 👀] Janis: [doing an impression of nice Ian to try and make him lol Jimmy: [you know it's spot on but that just reminds him what a dick Ian is so we just shake our head like ffs but obvs not at you gal] Janis: [yeah, mistake to make hen but we don't know what to do, little horizontal feelsy lean like !!!] Jimmy: [we're doing it back even if it hurts because we don't care, the feelsy lean is sacred] Janis: ['he's such a twat' the reassurance he doesn't need but we're saying it so seriously] Jimmy: [can't help genuinely smiling because you know Ian is the kind of person who everyone thinks is just such a standard dad and we obvs didn't think the bae would fall for it but there's always gonna be a part of us thinking he's right and we're wrong so the relief] Janis: [we all know the kind, just parenting you, psh, but we smiling back 'cos love to see it] Jimmy: [😍 because she's cute and we're in love] Janis: [gotta kiss him soft] Jimmy: [take your excuse to be soft because we know you both like it] Janis: [a good excuse because we are not trying to injure you boy forreal, but the restraint is a killer lmao] Jimmy: [the perfect excuse for you to show her how good you are with your hands even if you don't remember/are pretending you don't remember that bit of the drunken christmas eve convo because you can keep your distance a lil bit more but still kill her] Janis: [enjoy trying not to die gal, 'cos whilst making Ian overhear you is funny, waking the kid is not so shh] Jimmy: [at least he's deaf so you've got less chance than if you were at mcvickers house and Libi was just like oh hey, speaking of the caravan when you're snowed in is gonna be hilarious casually no privacy ever] Janis: [that's true, how do you wake up a deaf person except for rudely shaking them like HELLO also how do they know when there's a fire/any other kind of alarm, questions I have but are not entirely relevant rn, won't make Cass hate us that much already lmao, 'cos honestly, need an ally in you when Skerries alone] Jimmy: [I've seen vibrating ones that they can like put under their pillow and shit which is slightly less rude than just being like OI but yeah, we can win Cass over during this unexpectedly longer trip than we thought we'd be on] Jimmy: [but for now have a drink and recover gal] Janis: [a good idea, ang would like that] Janis: [lowkey pouty like you can't immediately return the favour but you simply cannot soz] Jimmy: [doing the pouty lip bite thing won't help but we simply must nevertheless] Janis: ['that's illegal'] Jimmy: [a lil lol which we're pretending doesn't hurt because we're fine] Janis: [obviously we notice 'cos in what world aren't we 'should really bandage you up' and looking like do you have any in or do we need to get that tomorrow] Jimmy: [🤨 because it's such a foreign concept that anyone actually cares about us that we can't hide our genuine surprise/confusion and then we have to go look because we're like this is awkward how dare she care about me, let's say there is so you can chuck them at her] Janis: ['that's what you need to do' like he's just thinking it's bullshit advice, unravel some of that bandage after it's thrown at you 'it'll heal faster' and gesturing for him to take his top off 'can be a mummy for a bit, ghost boy'] Jimmy: [obvs gonna throw his top at her as well because always] Janis: [pretending it's so gross like ew] Jimmy: [equally as obvs then getting all up in her grill like if you thought that was gross you'll HATE this] Janis: [the pretence of being #horrified is so thinly veiled, but focus gal, gotta bandage him up as tightly as you can so it's more comfortable for him, the casual intimacy, bye, pretend we do not notice] Jimmy: [what a mcvickers-esque moment] Janis: [truly] Jimmy: [do a ✔ on her in the same place as the bandage is like okay job done and because you do feel better for it and most importantly just shamelessly wanna touch her bare skin whenever we can] Janis: [dramatically stop breathing for a sec 'yeah?'] Jimmy: [kiss her as dramatically to show her you can without it hurting as much as it did before] Janis: [can't even fake mad about it] Jimmy: [interrupt this makeout sesh for long enough to casually pour some of whatever this bottle is into her mouth because it's always a saucy mood and she has earned it by nursing you back to health] Janis: [too much of a mood frankly we're so about it, also nice throwback to literally last night what is time] Jimmy: [gonna have to let y'all hook up because this boy has no chill but just be really careful please] Janis: [just let him lead and you should be fine] Jimmy: [gotta be soft so that's a whole new mood in itself because you have not yet] Janis: [feeding him drink in the same manner after but that likewise feels really soft 'cos basically doing it like it's medicine at this point like you gotta, then removing whatever clothes you got left on to get in bed] Jimmy: [shameless snuggling will ensue because we will play tetris if needs be until we find a position that's comfortable for you both to be in] Janis: [drawing the ✔ on him when we're settled but also a ❓] Jimmy: [taking her hand and turning it into a 👍 and then giving it a lil thank you squeeze before adding his own ? to ask if she's alright too] Janis: [snuggling down as a response] Jimmy: [a happy sigh compared to the dramatic one earlier] Janis: ['Jimmy-' but stopping 'cos don't know what you think you're gonna say hen] Jimmy: [the softest 'what?' ever] Janis: [just looking and LOOKING for a hot sec 'merry christmas'] Jimmy: [obvs we're saying it back even though we know that's not what she was gonna say] Janis: [you better stop] Jimmy: [will draw 😁 on you is it a pisstake/ are we this buzzing that the bae is here and tomorrow we can leave/do we wanna just touch her always/is it all of these] Janis: [gonna say we got lost on that one so we're just like what are you talking about boy/tickled like oi] Jimmy: [doing it again more slowly and deliberately so it'll tickle more and she might get it so we don't have to do it with our face if she doesn't lol] Janis: [just loling like staph 'I'm either gonna fall out or fuck you up here' but not mad, obvs] Jimmy: [hold onto her so she can't fall out and that's ofc the only reason] Janis: [random but have we ever said whether the caravan is 2 or 3 bedrooms?] Jimmy: [I don't think we've ever specified but I assume it's on the bigger side because mcvickers own it and all the fam ever] Janis: [let's go with 3 then, a double and 2 singles, makes sense, usually have a way to make beds in the lounge too] Jimmy: [I'll try and remember that for all the other people and gens it affects lol] Janis: [write that down boo lol]