#olivia o'brien photos

[aesallerie]

#olivia obrien #olivia o'brien photos #olivia obrien photos #olivia o'brien #halloween #halloween photos

[currentfications]

Reasons | Part 2

Pairing: Bada Lee x Reader, Felix x Reader?

Warning: Swearing, angst, toxic relationship

AN: I am going through some shit and will be taking it out on Howl and probably Felix (I do not have a personal vendetta against him except for the fact that he’s from Australia and I have an affinity with writing fellow aussies unlike with Howl oooo I’m telling you that shit is personal all I asked is for one chance Bada just one chance please). Thank you all for reading it still :)

Previous | Next

The streetlights blurred into one kaleidoscopic spell as y/n rested her head on Felix's shoulder in the steady car ride, still dizzy from all the excessive sobbing. The sharp pain from hours ago has since dulled, now throbbing against her temple.

It was around some four years ago when she first met Bada. She'd been invited to a dance class by her friend, who received a last minute work call. "Y/n I need a massive favor," she sounded out of breath as she hailed down a cab.

Strolling through the shops on a lazy Saturday afternoon, y/n glanced towards the address sent to her phone, blissfully unaware of the cruel joke fate was about to pull on her. JestJerk Studio- y/n couldn't help but fight back a chuckle fueled by childish humor. "I thought you said you were looking forward to this class? Something about a hot teacher- everything alright?"

"Yeah," a disappointed sigh was soon followed with a relieved one when she finally managed to hail down a ride, "I'm on call is all, didn't think they would actually assign me an overhaul flight. I mean it about the hot babe teaching the class by the way- when I land in 16 hours I better have a few pictures of her to help me acclimate to the jetlag."

Y/n breathlessly chuckled at her phone, checking the distance from the mall to the studio. "You're lucky I'm close by. You owe me a big one when you get back- I'm using my one day off a fortnight to attend your class-"

Y/n was cut off. "-and send pictures."

"I will send pictures," y/n reassured. "Now go have a safe flight, text me when you land!" Huffing a sigh, y/n wrapped up her shopping spree and headed towards the studio.

The flight attendant was right, the dance teacher was hot. Really hot. As a trainee, she was pretty much surrounded by pretty faces- but this, this is different. Maybe it's her height, or maybe her smile, or or maybe the way she moves. To say y/n was captivated was an understatement.

"Bada?" y/n tentatively approached after the lesson with a tightlipped smile, gripping her phone in her clammy hands as she remembered the promise she'd make.

The older girl's face lit up as she noticed her star student of the day approaching her. She too, had seen plenty of trainees come and go, but if there's one thing that taught her, it's the ability to recognise idol quality when she sees one. Plus, the fiery red hair is hard to miss. "Hi, y/n was it?"

Brimming with excitement when recognised by Bada, y/n nodded dumbly. "I- uh, c-can I please have a photo?" Fumbling over her words, y/n raised her phone to gesture instead.

"Yeah, of course!" Bada motioned the redhead to approach as she chirped sweetly, a warm smile fixed on her lips.

Y/n opened her mouth as if to say something before snapping her jaw shut, shuffling over to take a selfie with the older dancer. Bada reached a palm out to ask for the phone, before turning the phone over to snap a few selfies with the back camera. Heads tilted towards each other, the girls beamed at the series of shutter clicks, y/n's hand on Bada's shoulder to hoist herself slightly upwards for a better angle, Bada lifting the hand not used to hold the camera into a finger heart.

"Actually," y/n finally spoke up after the photo session, "my friend is wondering if they can have a picture of just you?" Recoiling at how awkward the request is, y/n slowly trailed off.

Letting out an incredulous chuckle, Bada handed the phone back to the shorter girl and took a step back to have her own pictures taken. "Remember to autograph them and send it to me," Bada teased, when y/n finally tucked the phone back into her pocket. "It'll be worth a lot of money once you're famous."

Y/n wonders if Bada still has the signed copy she eventually hand-delivered to the studio.

Squeezing her eyes shut at the fond memory, y/n pressed her head further into Felix's shoulder. Sensing the shuffle, he glanced over and ran a hand down her hair, an attempt at soothing the girl. She had long stopped crying since he found her curled up in the alleyway, but somehow the lack of tears in her eyes made her look more vacant. It pained him to see her like this.

"I thought you fell asleep," unsure of what to say to y/n, Felix continued to absentmindedly fiddle with a strand of her hair, the chemical treatments that all trainees' and idols' hair received had turned it brittle as y/n mental state right now. Fitting. "You should get some sleep," his voice barely above a whisper, lulling y/n into a daze. Her exhaustion is close to taking over but she still managed to shake her head a little.

Felix sighed. What happened? Y/n had always been a ray of sunshine for as long as he knew her- bubbly, charming, absolutely adorable; so what’s changed? His expression darken as a name came to mind- Bada Lee.

Bada Lee, the famous celebrity backup dancer turned choreographer, choreographer turned internet sensation following Street Women Fighter 2, internet sensation turned heartbreaker. All previous admiration he had held for the dancer crumbled with a glace towards y/n’s sulking feature. His hand dropped from y/n’s hair towards the corner of her eyes, wiping at the trail of evaporated salt water, glistening as the streetlights flicker past. Tracing a finger down her cheeks, stopping at her chin, Felix lifted y/n’s face to him with the knuckle of his finger. 

“Hey,” Felix’s coffee brown eyes met hers, faces inches apart, “she missed out. She fumbled the biggest bag in town- heartthrob of St. Patrick’s, finest trainee, and soon to be this town’s biggest débutée.” Y/n let out a halfhearted chuckle and pushed the brunette away, only for him to return his grip on her with palms on either side of her face. “I mean it. You deserve the world- don’t roll your eyes at me- you deserve someone who’d be proud of you and cherish you.”

Y/n let out a muffled protest, attempting to defend Bada. She’d say something along the lines of ‘she just needed some time, not everyone is ready for the world to perceive them as who they really are, especially in this conservative society’ if she was able to. 

As if reading her mind, Felix tutted and pulled her face even closer, “keep defending her and I’ll have to shut you up.” 

Felix slowly closed the last bit of distance between y/n’s and his faces, still cradling her face between his palms; he waited for a sign from the girl to recoil or push away, but as she docilely fluttered her eyes closed with a silent permission, Felix practically slammed his lips against hers. Truth be told, between the strict management and busy schedules, it has been a while since he last got to first base with anyone. 

The rustyness was not lost on y/n, who finally cracked a smile for the first time that evening (early morning) into the deepening kiss, no thanks to Felix's clumsiness. The rebound had proved himself useful. Biting down on his bottom lips, y/n buried a surfacing thought about Bada as she wrapped her arms around the neck of the boy to pull him closer. The dreaded feeling was shoved further down as Felix finally got a hold of himself and jammed his tongue into her gaping mouth, passionately licking off the taste of Bada from y/n’s mouth and replacing it with his. 

A gut wrenching wave of nausea washed over y/n as she wonders if Bada is doing the same with Howl.

#bada lee x fem reader #bada lee #bada lee x reader #angst #felix x reader #swf2 x reader #bada lee x y/n #skz felix #skz x reader #toxic relationship #felix x y/n #stray kids felix

[foxes-that-run]

2021 Haylor Timeline

Timeline Tag, or years 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023 and 2024..

18 January - Coney Island released as a single.

14 February Olivia at Harry’s house with luggage. Don't worry Darling filming wraps. On the 21st Taylor Lover tour cancelled.

10 March Instead of congratulating Harry on the nomination Zayn posted “F the Grammys”

15 March -Talk at the Grammys, Taylor and Harry part of small group of attendees. Harry goes over to Taylor and they are polite, Harry seems a little awkward and says “well it was nice to see you”. He keeps looking at her during his acceptance speech for record of the year.

Taylor wrote High Infidelity and WCS with Aaron Dessner while in LA for the Grammy's, when she saw Harry & J Mayer.

Niall and Liam congratulate Harry on his Grammy win, Zayn and Louis do not.

31 March - architect of Harry’s Erskine House renovations posts photos of the interior to their website. It has a black, wood pale grey palette with pink stairs

April 27 - Joe leaves UK to Belfast to film.

May 11 - HS & TS both at Brit awards (the 26th was a blood moon)

May 24 - Joe and Taylor seem together in Paris

21 June - Harry wrapped My Policeman in Italy, started in Feb. Released 1 September 2022. Holiday in Italy

2 July - renegade released

8 July - Harry and Olivia on yacht and in Italy

9 August - 26 August Harry in studio maybe mixing Harry's House in the behind scenes photos here you can see outfits he wore in LA on these dates.

4 September – 22 July 2023 - Love on Tour

9 September - Taylor at Toronto Film Festival and to premiere all too well

11 September - Harry at Toronto Film Festival to premiere My policeman, talks about wasted time being the worst thing in presser

17 September - wildest dreams TV released. Harry and Olivia in Phili with Xander, max and family

22 September - first heart kiss since 2018! St Paul - Falling, with Two Ghosts intro (4:31). Then again weekly till the end of the year

25 September - Taylor London Lena's wedding.

29 September - & 1 Oct Harry played Nashville and wore a white satin outfit, he played with his rings while performing Beautiful. Harry plays To Be so Lonely for 9 shows then never again, including Nashville N2 and NY. In Nashville looks up.

2 October - Harry recorded Satellite at Cave Studios in Nashville

22 October - one more photo of Taylor and joe in the bathroom leaked (the proper selfie), photos from 2016 leaked in 2020

26 October - Taylor posts TikTok "Autumn Lovers RISE" as a reenactment of a 27 September 2017 Tumblr post. She writes lyrics to ATW "just between us did the love affair maim you" "and Plaid stuff and ankle boots" she's wearing a skirt but says 'stuff' plaid shirts and ankle Chelsea boots is Harry in 2011-2013. And "Maroon/Hunter Green" The ATW move included a book coming out 13 years later about the love affair.

1 November - rumors Harry and OW fighting

12 November - Red TV released Harry wears red in his show on the 11th. All Too Well Short Film premiere Dylan O'Brien (who is in ATW film) is included in this footage of Austin and Dylan cheering when Jack plays Question..? in the Studio. Appears on Fallon and says she easter eggs 3 years in advance in reference to ATW.

16 November - Pleasing launch with Harry on bike photo on cover of Dazed

17 November – Taylor leaves NYC for Panama to go see Joe. Taylor posts a drunk TikTok from Panama. On the 20th she went to the national theater and leaves on the 22nd. Joe stays and films. Midnights written while gone

21 November - Last time Taylor is photographed in public for 3 months is the SNL performance for All too Well

25 November Rolling Stone noted the Haylor call and response “the long-running songwriting badminton between her and Harry Allegedly is pop call-and-response the way it ought to be”

28 November- 13 December Harry MIA. OW seen alone in LA

1 December Taylor wore Gucci lion ring to Zoe’s kravitz birthday throwback photo shared day after YLM date identified by Jack.

5 December - You're losing me written. Love on Tour in Buenos Aires

Continue to 2022

#haylor #Youtube #haylor timeline #2021

[yorkshire-rockchick]

Please can we know about your OCs, I've seen the odd mention to them in your fics on AO3

Oh, I love my OCs and can say so much about them.

THE PLAYERS;

Harry Winters - Goal keeper who moves up from the academy team at 16. Good frieds with Noah and Drew, boyfriend of Chloe.

Ezekiel Noah Gordon - Goes by Noah because he hates his first name. Came up from the academy. Plays as a right back defender. Good friends with Harry and Drew

Andrew "Drew" Cameron - A Scottish trans player who also went to the AFC Richmond academy. Plays as a striker and looks up to Jamie and Dani. Unofficially adopted by Paul and Tom.

THE FAMILY MEMBERS

Isabella "Izzy" Rosenfeldt - Anders girlfriend, later wife. They've been together since they were 15. You know the woman who hugs Anders at the end of the last episode when Richmond wins? This is her, I just made her interesting. She's half Spanish, half American. Her dad works for the US Government which is how she ended up in London.

Erin Reynolds - Paul Reynolds wife. They met at church and are the only Richmond couple to get married in a church due to both of them having a Catholic upbringing. Erin speaks Irish as a first language and didn't learn English until she was 16 when she decided she wanted to go to law school.

Olivia Catherine "Liv" Reynolds - Paul and Erin's eldest child. Named after her godparents. She is smarter than most children her age, likes hanging out with the team and calls them all her uncles. Based on the line "You told my daughter..." in series 2 when everyone has a go at Jamie

Emily Grace Reynolds -Erin and Paul's youngest daughter. Based on the line "What about sonograms?" when everyone has to delete photos off their phones.

Sophie O'Brien - Tom O'Briens wife. They met when Tom accidentally crashed his car into Sophie's. They get married after 6 months because they both like each other and they think it is a good idea. Sophie has a masters degree in chemistry and teaches at a private all girls school. She eventually gives up her job to focus on her PhD.

Pippa Kukoč (nee Edwards) - Sasha Kukoč's girlfriend, later wife. She is a nursing student who has a placement in the local Accident and Emergency department which means she sees a lot of the Richmond players. She is Jeff Goodmans cousin so he disapproved of her relationship at times.

Elizabeth - the fabulous creation of @orbitalpirate, she is a curvy goddess who is loved by Thierry Zoreaux.

Chloe Morgan - Harry's girlfriend. Knows nothing about football beyond what colours Richmond play in. Grew up in care so had a rough start in life. Rebecca offers her a job working for Richmond as a means to support herself and she loves it.

THE PETS

Spagetti the Corgi - Arlo Dixon's corgi. Occasionally looked after by Olivia Reynolds. Spagetti is a rescue dog, so everyone jokes Arlo is a rescue human after he moved in with Jeff.

Alfred Bumbercatch - Moe's cat. Alfred turned up one day and that was that. He is a Sphynx cat so Moe knits him a lot of jumpers.

Arthur the Rabbit - Tommy Winchester's rabbit. Arthur is spoiled and has free run of the house. Decan claims not to like him, this is a lie. Jamie laughs every time he hears the name.

Marshamallow McAdoo-Bumbercatch - Isaac and Moe's Pomeranian puppy that they get when they get married. Pretends not to like Alfred. Isaac treats her like a princess and it shows at times.

Cleo the cat - Jamie and Colin's maine coon cat. She is stubborn and only likes Jamie and Colin. She has been known to poop in the shoes of people she does not like.

Rocky the horse - Izzy's horse, brought for her by Anders after they found out they couldn't have children. Izzy swaps horse tips with Rebecca after Rebecca also gets a horse.

There are more OCs to be added, both human and pets but they are still in development.

#My OCs #Pets are characters too #You ask #I'll answer

[taylorssewingcircle]

2022 - March to June

March 3rd - Cari and Kelsea meet irl !!

Kelsea gets invited to Fletcher’s concert through a mutual connection with Brad.

Instagram Live 12:54

March 4th - Kelsea posts from LA

March 5th - Fletcher and Kelsea both post on insta from Fletcher’s concert

March 7th - Kelsea posts and Fletcher likes

March 15th - Fletcher posts from Nashville and Kelsea likes.

The girls sing Landslide together at Fletcher's Nashville concert.

March 16th - They both post pictures/vids from the concert.

Kelsea posts a photo dump with a clip of them singing Landslide at Fletcher's show and tags her.

The last pic in the dump is of Kelsea and Morgan. Fletcher doesn't like but she does comment lol.

Fletcher posts twice on insta. Kelsea likes both posts.

Fletcher also posts this TikTok.

which one of us likes tequila more though

March 17th - Fletcher posts about her bday.

It includes a clip of her and Kelsea dancing to Wannabe by the Spice Girls and Kelsea's voice can be heard in the background of another clip.

March 18th - Kelsea flies from Miami to Savannah

March 19th - Kelsea posts and Cari comments

Fletcher easter eggs Birthday Girl with a snippet of the song in this post.

March 29th - Fletcher easter eggs Girl Of My Dreams (the song) on this post.

April 1st - Kelsea posts about HEARTFIRST dropping as a single on April 8th

April 2nd - Fletcher posts and Kelsea comments.

April 6th - Fletcher posts and Kelsea comments

April 22nd - Fletcher posts from Stokholm and Kelsea comments.

April 26th - Fletcher posts in a field of daisies.

May 1st - Kelsea easter eggs MUSCLE MEMORY in this post and says it sounds like driving the PCH?

May 19th - Kelsea posts that 9 songs of her album are done.

May 29th - Fletcher posts this tiktok with Olivia O'Brien and Kelsea comments

June (date unknown) - Cari plays Kelsea Better Version.

"cari played me better version in june through my jeep speakers in nashville and i felt my eyes get teary from the sentiment that truly loving someone well means that you give them your best to make them better."

[source: Kelsea's Better Version collab post]

June 12th - Fletcher easter eggs Holiday in a post.

June 13th - Fletcher posts from Texas.

June 17th - Fletcher easter eggs Girl of My Dreams (song) in this post.

Kelsea easter eggs WEATHER with a photo dump including Morgan.

I've been thinkin' you've been thinkin' 'bout something else, mm Yeah, we felt perfect, now I'm nervous, can you even tell? Mm Did I wake you up on the wrong side of the bed? Is there someone's body that you'd rather be laying with instead?

I'm so tired of your weather Stormy when we're together Yeah, we used to be sunny and 75 We were dancing, baby, rain or shine Had my dress in your dresser Now somehow, I need a sweater How'd we go from summer to cold as ice? Are we really lovers if you're changing your mind Like the weather, weather, weather?

June 20th - Cari and Kelsea go out together and sign this book.

Cari and Kelsea were here 6/20/22 12:42am

Fletcher’s stories from the night:

June 22nd - Kelsea posts this photo dump that features the book & a snippet of Love Is A Cowboy & Fletcher comments

June 28th - Fletcher includes her own POV of the book in a dump.

With a little detective work, the fletcherinis have established that this is probably Patterson House in Nashville. This literally doesn't mean anything or provide proof to anything it was just fun to hunt it out.

Have a look at the bar and the studs on the leather chair.

June 29th - Kelsea posts this and Fletcher interacts.

CONTINUE TO JULY

#Youtube #Instagram

[hollywoodfamerp]

UNFOLLOW (5+ DAYS OF INACTIVITY: THE FOLLOWING HAVE BEEN REOPENED)

Hwang Yeji ( @hwanqveji ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Jennie Kim ( @jendevgi ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Jung Wooyoung ( @wooyvung ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Leati Joseph Anoa'i (Roman Reigns) ( @tribclchiefjoe ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Nick Robinson ( @notnickrobinson ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Olivia Rodrigo ( @livsrigoo )

Otto Wood ( @notottofromparx ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Rebecca Quin (Becky Lynch) ( @bvckybalboa ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

Zac Efron ( @famezacsefron ) *RECLAIMED WITHIN 24 HOURS

WARNING (3 - 4 DAYS OF BEING INACTIVE/INCONSISTENT ACTIVITY)

Cate Blanchett ( @cate-eblanchett )

Dylan O'Brien ( @dylcbrien )

Jessica Lange ( @jessiicalange )

Lili Reinhart ( @lilreinhvrt )

Natalia Dyer ( @thatnattyice )*

Ning Yizhuo ( @ninqningie )*

Sabrina Carpenter ( @carpentrs )*

Sarah Hyland ( @hf-sarahhyland )

BUBBLE WARNING (DO NOT UNFOLLOW)

Ariana Grande ( @ariianaz )

Brittany Baker (Britt Baker) ( @brittanybaker )

Harry Kane ( @harrykane-hf )

*Inconsistent activity, only answering memes, signing on the day before an activity check, reblogging/posting social media and photos do not count as activity. Bubble warning is for members who fall under what HFRP considers to be bubble rping. Further explanation of bubble rping is defined in our rules.

Those who have been unfollowed are more than welcome to return! You have 24 hours to message us via ask box POLITELY if you’d like to reclaim your character before it officially gets reopened. Don’t forget, if you feel like you need to step away - you can always ask for a hiatus!

#activity check #hollywoodfameunfollow #hwang yeji #jennie kim #jung wooyoung #roman reigns #nick robinson #olivia rodrigo #otto wood #becky lynch #zac efron #cate blanchett #dylan o'brien #jessica lange #lili reinhart #natalia dyer #ning yizhuo #sabrina carpenter #sarah hyland #ariana grande #britt baker #harry kane

[325projectspace]

Basia Serraty, from right to left - Olivia, 2020, metal print 16" x 20" End of summer, 2019, metal print 16" x 20" Norma's cafe, Dallas, 2021, metal print 16" x 20"

From: Hints, clues and evidence - 9/15 -10/1/23 325 Project Space

photo - Beth O'Brien

#325 project space #jeff feld #art gallery #contemporary art #ridgewood #artists on tumblr #beth o'brien #bushwick #sculpture #brian karlsson #dushka vujovic #basia serraty

[bittenfms]

───  𝐀𝐂𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐃 ! welcome  to  forks, duckie !  we  look  forward  to  seeing  you  around  town, and  do  hope  nothing  bad  happens  to jacob black , miray demerci + silvanus "silas" valor . please  go  through  the  checklist  and  send  in  your  account  within  twenty-four  hours  or  your role  will  be  reopened !  

⟨ – cody christian, cis man, he/him. ⟩ it seems like jacob black has been seen around town, humming 5 leaf clover by luke combs under their breath. apparently they are a 28 year old shifter. townsfolk whisper about them being charismatic and loyal, but also insouciant and impulsive. they’re a member of the uley pack, and they give off the vibes of hours spent wandering the woods and detailing every trail by memory, black and grease stained shirts from workings on cars, smile that rivals the brightness of the sun. ( penned by duckie, 26, she/her, est. )

⟨ – dylan o'brien, cis man, he/him. ⟩ it seems like silvanus "silas" valor has been seen around town, humming what i've done by linkin park under their breath. apparently they are a 30 / 500 year old hybrid. townsfolk whisper about them being reliable and independent, but also pensive and arrogant. they’re a nomad, and they give off the vibes of always stuck in theoretical ideations, a photo album full of polaroids and papers that depict only the most important memories, spending a lot of time learning new recipes and trying them out. ( penned by duckie, 26, she/her, est. ) *amplification

⟨ – hande ercel, cis woman, she/her. ⟩ it seems like miray demerci has been seen around town, humming gone girl by olivia o'brien under their breath. apparently they are a 28 year old human. townsfolk whisper about them being analytical and convivial, but also dogmatic and oblivious. the mortician has been in town for her whole life, and gives off the vibes of childhood science experiments gone bad and leaving permanent cosmetic damage to childhood home, traveling around the world but missing the rainy hometown she loves, cooking homemade pasta every night ( penned by duckie, 26, she/her, est. )

#appless rp #twilight rp #oc rp #supernatural rp #spn rp #dark rp #town rp #bitten.accepted

[nvisiblestring]

i don't get to choose the way i feel, it's just the truth, and i don't care if i get hurt, i'm fine

better than feeling lonely single art redesign (click for better quality!)

#olivia o'brien #btfl #swifties that listen to olivia are my best friends by default #if you don't listen to her you should #nvisiblestringedit #photoshop #photo

[davidsvlogs]

bobbie gave in to peer pressure

#olivia o'brien #bobbie #sad bobbie #the vlog squad #photo #joe vulpis #ugh its joe

[poshvalentine]

uhmmmmmm

#the vlog squad #vlog squad #davids vlogs #zane hijazi #anastasia karanikolaou #olivia o'brien #noah centineo #photo

[aesallerie]

#olivia o'brien photos #photos #girls #olivia obrien photos #olivia obrien #for edits #for edit #ig stories

[not-a-fever-dream]

oliviaobrien maybe i’m biased bc we have the same label but these two gave the best and most heartfelt vma performances of the night

#jessie reyez #shawn mendes #olivia o'brien #omg faves #mtv vmas #2018 #photo

[breakmyheartwithlyrics]

Olivia O’Brien- hate u, love u

#my edit #olivia o'brien #hate u love u #oliviaobriendaily #dailyladylyrics #my photo #lyric edit #aesthetic

[writingsfromhome]

Josslyn

Request: Harry imagine based off the song Josslyn by Olivia O'Brien?

A/N: This was in my inbox for a while, but I finally finished it! It got a little long but I really wanted to set up a backstory. Hope it’s what you wanted! :)

Part 2

————————————————————-

My leg bounces under the table, eyeing everyone walking through the door until my best friend Regan walks in. The first day back to school always felt like hell on earth. It would be more unbearable if my best friend didn’t have the same homeroom as me.

“I want to die,” she drops into the seat in front of mine and turns around. “Like literally. I can’t wait to be done with this dump.”

“We just do it all over again in uni,” My stomach turns remembering what our final year meant. I didn’t even know what I wanted to do with the rest of my life and I had to choose this year. It was a scary thought.

“At least there’ll be more freedom, I won’t be living with my crazy family, and,” she pauses ticking each item on her fingers, and wiggles her eyebrows. “All the hot guys.”

“Is somebody talking about me?”

We turn and Harry Styles, class jock, stands above us with a pencil behind his ear and a shit-eating grin on his face.

“If we were, you would’ve heard ‘major douchebag loser’,” Regan rolls her eyes. I give Regan a look like what an idiot and she ignores him to continue on about her dream school. As hard as I concentrate though, I’m too aware of Harry walking around and settling into the seat behind me.

It had happened, over the summer-we had hooked up. I can’t say it was a shining time for me, I also didn’t reqret it quite as much as one might think.

It was at a party I was invited to while Regan was visiting her grandparents in New Jersey and I was getting lonely. He’d cornered me, made me feel less alone. The hookup lasted a week, before we were off, and then another two weeks in August. I quit him-like a habit-the week before school started.

I confessed to Regan, she’d warned me to avoid him during the year if I wanted to have a decent final year. So I didn’t know if him showing up in the first hour of senior year was a good sign or an omen.

“You girls have a good summer?” Harry asks behind me. Regan locks eyes with me-she would handle it.

“You’re sort of interrupting our conversation here. Maybe you should find a new seat if you wanted to make friends.”

A small laugh escapes me, I couldn’t help it.

“Y/N,” Harry calls me out. “Have you forgotten how to talk or you’re getting shy on me?”

I turn around, he was way too smug. “Regan’s said it perfectly, why do you need me to talk.”

“Just making sure you could,” his eyes flash with humour before he says casually: “I wasn’t sure if you’d worked your mouth too hard this summer that it stopped working or something.”

My jaw drops and I hear Regan gasp.

“Yeah, like that.” Harry points to my open mouth and it takes everything in me not to slap him. But then he does a strange thing, his mocking smile softens into a genuine one. His eyes crinkling like we were on the ins of a joke and the angry flame softens at the curve of his smile.

There was this one weekend where his parents had left town and we’d spent the whole time just binging bad movies, under covers, learning every inch of each other. I never thought it would be a calming feeling waking up and seeing Harry’s sleeping face on the pillow next to me but I had stared at it for what felt like an hour until I’d poked him awake and he’s just pulled me in to sleep longer.

“You’re disgusting,” I tell him now, but it doesn’t have the same rage it would have last year. He’d worn me down, and I know he only liked to wind me up because he thought it was hot. He’d said as much over the summer.

I turn just as our teacher walks in and class begins. Harry gets in trouble for talking to his friends, I ignore the note he throws my way, we’re told it’s the most important year in our life thus far and I almost fall asleep halfway. Just a typical day of high school.

***

It was near the end of the first week, already I had an essay and a project due in two weeks and a thousand pages of math. I was just happy it was Friday and Regan and I were going to do our regular end-of-the-week detox: Starbucks and driving around town.

“Don’t hate me,” Regan says as I approach her car. “But Adam just invited me with his friends to the mall and I know we were supposed to hang out but this is maybe the first time he actually looked me in the eye and talked to me so-“

“It’s okay,” I interrupt her even though I was bummed. “You’ve been trying to get him to notice you all year so...finally! we’ll hang out over the weekend.”

Regan hugs me. “Really? You’re okay? You could come with us. Or I can drop you home first...”

“I can take the bus,” I insist. “We rode the bus last year remember?”

“Ugh, too soon,” Regan shakes her head. “I’ll make it up to you I promise. He’s calling now I’ll see ya!”

I wave her off and begin the slow walk to the bus stop, thinking of things I could do tonight by myself. Someone whistles to my right and I look up. Harry waves his hand, standing by his car. My face flushes as I remember the things that went on in that back seat.

“Where’s a pretty girl like you going all alone?” Harry shouts. I sigh and walk up to him.

“Do you ever realise how predatory you sound?”

“I’m king of the jungle,” he gestures to the school. “Why wouldn’t I sound predatory.”

I cover my face, “Omg please shut up Harry do you even hear yourself? You’re such a-an-ugh!”

“Hey,” his hand peels mine off of my eyes and he holds it in his grip as he walks backwards until his back hits his car, pulling me along. “What’s the matter with you? Didn’t we have fun this summer-why do you act like you hate me?”

His honesty shuts me up. “I-I don’t. I never said I hated you.”

“You sure act like it,” he crosses his arms. “You ignore me in homeroom, roll your eyes every time I say something...”

“We had a fling Harry, we’re not dating each other.” I shrug, trying to tug my hand away from Harry but he holds tight. “There’s nothing more to it. And to be honest...you’ve always been kind of annoying.”

“You’re kind of annoying,” Harry smiles again, tugging my sleeve to bring me closer. I don’t even resist moving into his orbit and settling between his outstretched legs as his arms wrap around my waist.

The truth was being with Harry was nice. He was a cocky jerk who knew he was desirable but when I was with him all the noise in my head died down for a bit and I existed in the present. That’s how he lived: for the now. And even though we were only more than friends and less than together forever, we had something between us. I just had to make sure my heart didn’t get caught up in between it. I’d had too many guys break my heart like I’d told Harry about one day when he’d driven us to a beach and we’d spent most of the day laying in the sun. Something about being there made me open up. He’d said he didn’t want to hurt me like the boys before. So we’d kept things light.

“You have any plans tonight?” Harry asks, his eyes shamelessly on my lips. I feel the familiar flutter in my stomach. Even though Harry would get with any body with boobs, it still felt nice to be looked at like this. By him.

“Not anymore,” I say. “Regan cancelled last minute so-“

“You’re free?” Harry sounds happy. I nod and he lets me go to move to the passenger door. “Get in, where do you want to go?”

“I...” I move to the car and sit inside, I told myself-and Regan-this wouldn’t happen and yet. It was. But Regan did ditch me for Adam so, maybe this was just the alternative. “Regan and I usually just grab drinks and drive around with music on.”

“Can I drive you somewhere?” Harry asks. I smile, of course.

***

Harry ends up taking me to a drive-in theatre. I’d never been to one and the excitement is all over my face. “It’s exactly like the old photos!” I squeal as he leans over and pushes my seat back. He does the same to his. “Have you been here before?”

“My family used to come here when we younger,” Harry smiles. I grin back at him and soon we’re locked in a staring contest because neither of us can look away. I open my mouth to say something but Harry moves forward, cupping my face to pull me to him. All common sense flies out the window as I get lost in his kiss. I tug at his hair the way he likes it and he presses me against the door as he kisses me harder, the handle jabbing my back but I didn’t even care. I’d missed Harry even though it had only been a week. His hands roam lower and lower until they stop as someone knocks on his window.

“Hello!” A muffled voice shouts from his window. We force each other apart. Harry looks at me with a drunken look on his face-eyes half lidded, a lopsided smile...and I’m sure I looked the same. We check who was at his door and it’s the girl bringing us our snacks.

“Harry?” She says as we roll down the window.

“Uh-oh-oh hey, Josslyn right? Long time!”

Harry grabs the drinks from...Josslyn, who looked familiar, and passes them to me to put in the dashboard holder we’d received when we entered. I keep an eye on the interaction as Josslyn goes from professional to flirty in under a second.

“Uh yeah because you never responded to any of my messages over the summer! How have you been? You look so good!”

“Yeah I’m good, I didn’t know you worked here?”

“My parents own the thing,” she glances back. “I have to work here when it gets busy.”

“No way,” Harry’s now fully interested in their conversation with his back to me and I feel a little left out. “I used to come here all the time as a kid did your parents own it back then?”

“Yeah! They took over from my grandparents. We definitely saw each other as kids cuz I was here all the time. Like every summer. I know every single lyric to every single summer hit from 1999 to present.”

“That’s impressive,” Harry laughs. I pick at the m&ms off the popcorn, feeling slightly jealous even though it didn’t make sense to be. Harry and I weren’t exclusive or anything, he wasn’t mine and I wasn’t his.

“Well I gotta go get the next order but we should catch up some time,” Josslyn puts her hand on Harry’s arm. “My number’s the same: if you’ve been ignoring my texts like I think you were then you should have it in your phone. Maybe we can recreate old times.”

With a wink, she’s gone and Harry clears his throat as he goes through his phone. His chuckle when he finds her texts irritates me.

“So like, do you have a lot of girls texting you that you just ignore?”

“What?” Harry looks up like he’d forgotten I was even there. “No, we just have some history. The texts were...funny.”

If I was a crazy girlfriend I would’ve demanded to see those texts but I was neither crazy or his girlfriend so I just look forward, kicking off my shoes and folding my legs into myself. I didn’t want to feel this way but I couldn’t help it.

“You’re not jealous are you?” Harry sneaks closer to me, clearly intrigued that I could be. But I don’t give him the satisfaction.

“Why would I be jealous?”

“Right?” He puts his hand on my knee and it tingles. “She doesn’t mean anything anyway. Just someone from the past.”

“Like me someday,” I don’t know what makes me say it. Maybe I was just moody.

He furrows his brow, leaning back in his seat. “Y/N,” I look over at him but he looks like he’s struggling for words. I raise my eyebrow and he holds out his arm. “Come here.”

“Where?” I ask, looking him over. He sighs and in a single move he’s put one arm under my knees and the other around my back as he tries to lift me while seated.

“Harry stop!” I can’t help but laugh as the stick hits my bum, my knees spill the overflow of popcorn, and we knock heads. “What are you doing!”

Harry laughs and motions to me, “Just c’mere!”

I oblige, twisting my body to straddle him in the front seat. I make sure not to lean back-I’d done that in the past and blared the horn. I’d learned since then.

“What?” I ask, pretending to still be upset but the ridiculous move minutes earlier had already washed it away. He moves my hair behind my ear and holds my face above his.

“You’re lovely,” he says and I melt. He knows it.

“I wasn’t jealous,” I mumble as he peppers my neck with kisses, “I just...” the words already slip away from me.

“Mhm,” he hums.

***

“Thanks,” I say to Harry. We’re parked outside my house and we hesitate to leave each other. The movie was fun, Harry was distracting throughout but that just added to the fun.

“Your parents home?” Harry asks innocently.

“Yes,” I roll my eyes. I check the time, it was nearly 11pm. I’d told them I would be home by 10 but I knew they would be asleep so I had pushed my luck. “Where else would they be?”

Harry shrugs, “My parents are out of town again.”

He scratches at a scab on his hand, hiding his face. After spending time with Harry, I knew his parents weren’t around much what with high profile jobs and travelling all over. His house was huge but empty and it made Harry make a little more sense to me then. Right now though, he just wanted to get me in bed.

“I’d invite you in but if you were caught, my funeral would be Sunday.”

“I’d come in a disguise,” Harry reaches for my hand and threads his fingers through it. “And jump into the grave after you, I’d be as dramatic as possible.”

“Harry you’re mistaken,” I say. “Your funeral would be the exact same day.”

Harry laughs and kisses my hand, “Then we’d just find each other in the afterlife yeah?”

I lean towards him and kiss him tenderly, I try to stop myself but it feels like I’m falling and I remember Regan’s words as I cave and sneak him into my room, hushing him as he bumps into every possible piece of furniture. But I forget it all the second we get under covers only to find him gone the next morning with a text promising me coffee on my front porch.

***

“Kiss any hot guys over the weekend?” Harry whispers in my ear Monday morning. It was a couple weeks since I’d snuck him into my room and we had been seeing each other pretty regularly. Harry sat with Regan and I at lunch sometimes despite her glares, and threw me notes often in class that were just bad drawings. But there were days where he would be distant and I would see him flirting with another girl. I would have to scold myself then, even though I was in his bed half the time we never said where we drew the line. Although I felt what I felt, I couldn’t expect any more from him.

This past weekend, Regan and I had driven to a few universities she was interested in and I could potentially be interested in. We’d crashed at a friend’s dorm before driving back Sunday afternoon. It gave me a small thrill that Harry might have been thinking about me kissing other guys even though he didn’t text me once.

“That depends on what you define as a hot guy,” I tease as I turn around but Harry looks annoyed.

“Oh,” he stares. “So you had fun over the weekend?”

His annoyance rubs me the wrong way, he could flirt with people and do whatever he wanted but he was annoyed at a joke? “Lots, not that you would know since you went awol yourself.”

Harry raises a brow but I just shrug and turn to the front. He was probably hanging out with other girls, not that I should care. But when it’s confirmed when Regan shows me the instagram story of someone she follows, I click through and find he was indeed. The picture shows him, a girl from our basketball team, and Josslyn on the beach getting high. My stomach churns for the rest of the day but I don’t dare bring it up. I just tell him we needed a break, maybe the distance would stop the obsession.

***

Harry was throwing one of his parties on Friday. With his parents gone most of the time it was the perfect place to host our class. This morning when he told Regan and I to swing by, I’d lingered behind and we’d made up. I was still nervous about the party, even though Harry and I were on again.

At the party, I hang out with Regan, Adam, and his friends for a bit. I talk to a few other friends and see some unfamiliar face. Harry catches up to me halfway through and apologises.

“I got caught up with everyone,” he says, his words softened with alcohol. I had seen glimpses of him with his friends, seen him flirt with a few girls when he came in but he ended up with me here so I don’t hold onto it.

“That’s okay,” I place my hand without a drink on his chest, feeling the steady heartbeat underneath. “You’re here now.”

He wraps his arms around me, “You’re staying the night right?” He whispers in my ear. It tickles and I giggle.

“As long as you don’t get too drunk.”

“So you won’t help me out if I get too drunk?” He pouts.

I laugh, about to say something but someone comes up to us in our private moment. Josslyn.

“Harry! Thanks for the invite!” Josslyn puts her arms out so Harry lets go of me to give her a hug. I try to wash away the possessive paranoia with my beer but I feel it creeping up. Josslyn glances over at me and I give her a smile.

“Hey,” I say awkwardly.

“Hi! You’re from the drive-in right?”

I was surprised she remembered me considering she didn’t even look at me that day. “Yeah, the same one.”

“Ooh,” she glances between us. “So are you two like dating or something?”

“Uhm...” Harry and I awkwardly look at one another as we try to find the right words. “Not really-“ I start to say as Harry says, “We just hang out...”

“That makes sense,” she flashes her eyes at Harry and I feel more insecure than ever. It reminds me that they did hang out together on the beach, maybe more often than I knew. Harry looks unbothered though. “So I can steal Harry away for a bit? You don’t mind? It’s been a while since we caught up!”

“I don’t own him,” I fake laugh even though I want to shout leave us alone liar!

I watch them leave, a sinking feeling in my stomach as Harry only glances my way before leaving. I stumble from group to group after that, finally locating Regan in a game of beer pong. I cheer her on and almost convince myself I was having fun but I continue to scan the room for Harry. My phone finally buzzes later in the night, Harry was upstairs asking me to come up.

“Harry?” I ask quietly as I knock on his door and peer around the corner. He’s laying on his floor shirtless and his room needs airing out. I sigh and open his window. “Where did you get the weed?”

“What? I didn’t do anything,” Harry says from the floor. “Where were you?”

“I was downstairs, at your party. You disappeared with Josslyn.” I can’t hide the edge in my voice.

“She shared her stash,” Harry says, his voice a low rumble. “We just talked about life.”

“Right, is this all she does?” It seemed Harry and her only ever got high together. “Did you want anything? I was watching Regan win and I’d like to go back if I’m here for no reason.”

“No wait,” he gets up slowly and walks to me, trying to kiss me but I pull away.

“I’m not interested right now Harry,” I push his arms off me. All I knew was he left with Josslyn and ended shirtless on his floor, high and alone. Who knows what they did.

“I was alone this whole time,” Harry tries to convince me. “She left a long time ago.”

“She left that too?” I point to a tanktop draped on his bed.

“That’s....that’s yours?” Harry says.

“Oh right, I forgot what my own fucking clothes look like.”

I stomp to the door but he calls out, “You’re making it a big deal! Nothing happened!”

I didn’t trust that. Not when he lied to my face like that.

***

At school on Monday, Harry tries to talk to me but I ignore him all morning. He forces me into an empty classroom and tries to win me over but I push him away as a teacher walks in and tells us to leave.

“Y/N,” Harry whines. “It’s not a big deal come on! She’s just an old friend!”

“Did you date her?” I demand, finally stopping by my locker.

“No I-we didn’t date. She’s just an old friend.”

“You keep mentioning,” I roll my eyes.

“Because it’s true, babe.” Harry touches my arm. “Listen. Nothing happened.” When I don’t respond he takes it as in invitation to ask if I wanted to do homework at his place after school. I tell him I’d see.

I end up going. We don’t do a lot of homework.

***

A couple weeks go by without a snag, I finally settle into a rythm for senior year and join the basketball team with Regan for our final year. I go over the endless decisions of what I wanted to do for the rest of my life, and on weekends, I would hang out with Harry at his place.

It’s our first game of the season and Regan and I are doing our warmups as we watch the bleachers fill with friends and our rival school.

“Will Harry be here?” Regan asks, although she still didn’t like him she had accepted she would see him from time to time.

“I thought he would. Maybe I should call him.”

I leave the loud gym and duck into the locker room. There’s only two other people, so I shuffle to the side and call Harry.

“Y/N,” he picks up on the fourth ring, he sounds out of breath. “What’s up?”

“Harry,” I say cautiously. “Where are you? I thought you were coming to our first game?”

“Oh shit uh yeah,” he sounds panicked. “I uh can’t-really uhm-.”

I hear a laugh and muffled noise, like Harry had dragged his microphone against his shirt. “Babe I can’t see you right now okay? I’ll swing by at halftime.”

“Oh okay...” before I can say anything he’d hung up. That was weird, unless I was overthinking it. But I remember the muffled noises in the back-he was with someone else.

I slowly put my phone back in my bag and look up, the one girl from my team, I think her name was Valentina. She stays near her locker but she’s obviously listening to my conversation. I don’t think much of it, and head out to find Regan. Screw Harry, we had a game to win.

I take my position as forward and Regan and I exchange fierce looks before smiling. I look around at our rival team, recognising a few from last year. And that’s when I realise why Josslyn looked familiar to me. She stands exactly diagonally from me, already looking at me-I remember her from semi-finals last year.

She narrows her eyes and I do a double take, maybe she was just being friendly competitive. But as the first quarter progresses, she gets aggressive, coming over to my side even when she should be on hers, and making sure to check me as she runs past. I glance at the referree but she doesn’t notice a thing. What was going on?

I ask Regan before the second quarter begins but she hadn’t noticed. She tells me she’d keep an eye out and once the whistle blows for halftime she runs up to me.

“She has it in for you, what did you do to her?” Regan whispers.

“Nothing!” I shout-whisper. “She’s an ‘old friend’ of Harry’s but I don’t know what I did to her...she hates me!”

“She wants to kill you Y/N, I have never-“

“Hey Y/N,” Regan’s interrupted by Harry who finally shows up. I continue drinking my water as he stands there uncomfortably. “Uh, I’m sorry I’m late?”

“Missing the first half isn’t late,” Regan pipes in for me. “It’s missing half the game.”

“Well...sorry for missing half the game,” Harry says but it doesn’t actually sound like he’s sorry. Just on the edge of annoyance. “Could I talk to you alone Y/N?”

I glance at Regan and let her know I was okay. She makes a show of being annoyed and goes to find Adam.

“What do you want?” I ask.

“To say I’m sorry,” Harry says again.

“About?” I raise my eyebrow. There was something he wasn’t telling me, everything about today was off from our phone call to the way Josslyn was attacking me on the court. Speaking of, I glance around and notice her staring at us.

“You know,” Harry doesn’t meet my eye. “Missing your first game and stuff.”

“Okay,” I watch the timer count down our halftime and I needed a water refill. “I’ll catch up with you later. Your ‘old friend’ Josslyn is here if you want to hang out with her!”

Harry stares at me like he’s trying to figure me out, my sarcasm lost on him. I raise my eyebrow which makes him stop. He kisses my cheek and walks to the bleachers. Weird.

***

When we switch sides, Josslyn must’ve negotiated with someone because she stands opposite me.

“Bring it on 15,” Josslyn calls me by my number as we wait for the whistle. She didn’t even know my name.

“Likewise,” I crouch down. “We don’t lose on home turf.”

“Too bad you already lost on home turf,” she says just as the whistle blows and she’s off. My head spins as I try to figure out what she meant and I end up missing a pass. My teammates shoot me a look and I try to focus. But Josslyn continues to taunt me and try to mess with me. By the end of it, we win by three and I gloat as much as I want to.

Until Valentina corners me in the changeroom.

“Hey, Y/N. I know we don’t talk much but can we talk? Girl-to-girl?”

I walk towards the windows and she follows. “What’s up Val?”

“I...don’t know how to say this. I’ve been friends with Harry for a while and Josslyn too...” As soon as I hear the name I realise it was her instagram Regan had shown me. And that’s why she was eavesdropping on the conversation. Her and Josslyn were friends. “...a couple times but you should know she doesn’t care he’s with you. I tried to tell her he had a girlfriend but she said he didn’t? I think they...hang out if you know what I mean.”

My ears ring as I stare at Val, what she’s trying to tell me. I couldn’t believe it, I’d been so stupid. Of course that’s what was going on.

“Thanks,” I say abruptly and turn around to grab my stuff from my locker. Letting Regan know I’d meet her at her car. My mind was heaving as everthing clicked into place. Harry’s party, Val’s stories that weekend I was away, how he had lied to my face...the other voice on the line when he said he couldn’t come to the first half. It was Josslyn. He was with Josslyn.

I’m still in my shorts, only having changed my shirt. But I storm out and find Harry at his car where he said he would be.

“Hey Y/N, where are we celebrat-“

“Josslyn,” I say and Harry shuts up. “You and Josslyn? Really? It’s one thing to do it and another thing to fucking lie to me for weeks!”

“Okay wait, can we talk somewhere-“

“No!” I shove Harry in his chest and he stumbles into his car. “I-I’m such an idiot! Everyone told me this would happen and I thought okay, he’s a player and a flirt but at least he doesn’t lie! But you lie like the truth is a chore, you’re scum just like everyone said you were!”

“Wait!” Harry shouts as I leave. “You can’t be this angry with me, it didn’t mean anything! And we aren’t even together Y/N!”

“You’re really playing that card?” I spin around. “We never drew the line but read the fucking signs Styles, I thought we made it clear how we felt. You didn’t even care at all did you?”

I ignore what he says and head back, towards Regan’s car to wait for her. People in the lot stare but I don’t care. And to make it worse, I walk past a group of the other team on my way to Regan’s car and Josslyn is one of them. She smirks and I want to strangle her.

“I told you you’d already lost,” she says as I shoot her a dirty look.

“It’s not called losing when he was never worth having,” I stick up my middle finger and use my rage to propel me the rest of the way without breaking down. As soon as I sit in Regan’s car, I break down. She doesn’t say anything, just turns up the music and we go for a drive.

***

Harry tries to speak to me. Through text or calls, he tries to pass me notes and tap my shoulder but Regan offers to switch seats and I accept it. I was torn between feeling absolutely nothing and wanting to cry into a tub of ice cream. Mostly I was angry, at Harry but also myself.

After practice on Thursday, I walk towards the bus stop with my gym bag bouncing off my knees. Regan couldn’t make practice so I didn’t have a ride, but I didn’t mind-I could use the time to clear my head....Until the very person I was trying to clear away falls into step with me. Harry.

“Y/N can we talk? You’re avoiding me and I feel really bad about what happened I just want to talk.”

“Nothing to talk about,” I pick up my pace.

“I’m sorry okay? I fucked up but we were never an item Y/N! We never said what we were. It didn’t mean anything with Joss.”

He hits the nail on the head, the same thing I was angry at myself about. I try to continue my steely silence but I couldn’t, not with the way he says her name.

“I know that Harry, we never said where we drew the line, but I’m sure you read the signs. You knew what we had was different. But I guess you had to go and ruin it just so you could get a quick fuck and I’m sure you had fun doing it too so I’ll leave you to her. I don’t care anymore.”

“Y/N wait don’t say that! Don’t give up on us! It-it wasn’t like that! I didn’t know...wait!” Harry falls behind as I continue speed walking but he catches up at the bus shelter. There’s no one else waiting so it’s hard to ignore him.

“Y/N, it just happened. I didn’t mean to hurt you, it just happened.”

I snort, not amused in the least. “You were hanging out with her whenever we were off, maybe when we were on too. It was bound to happen,” I turn and watch for the bus so I didn’t have to look at his face, “those things don’t just happen. They don’t.”

“Okay listen, we can take a break. If you want space I can give that to you. I hate fighting, Y/N you mean something to me. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I’m thinking now just please. I never said it before but you mean a lot to me, you’re different Y/N...I’m different around you and I-well I-“

“Harry,” I force him to stop. I didn’t want him to say the words out of desperation. Not like this. Not from him. I see the bus off in the distance, finally. “Harry you act like you’re the victim but you hurt me, you lied to me like telling the truth was a chore to you. You’re right though. I was never yours. I don’t want to fight...I just never wanna talk again.”

Harry opens his mouth to say something just as the bus pulls up. I turn to face him once more.

“Don’t call me, what we had...whatever is was, is over.” I turn as the doors open but not before saying: “I hope that it was worth it, fucking Josslyn.”

His mouth opens in disbelief, the same mouth I used to dream about when it wasn’t kissing me, and be consumed by when it was. The person I knew would ruin me but I thought might turn out different. The guy I toed a line with but will never cross. Especially not anymore.

I flash my card to the bus driver and hoist my bag onto my shoulder as I shuffle further into the bus. My legs ache from practice and my stomach rumbles as I sit. This was senior year, it’d been fun but this was my future. Harry wasn’t the kind of guy who was ever going to be in my future.

As the bus groans and moves forward, I look out the window. Harry sits at the bus stop with his head in his hands, maybe this was a turning point for him. Maybe he was going to change. Maybe he wasn’t. But I couldn’t stick around to find out. I decided I was going to move on, and leave him in the dust with his Josslyn.

#harry styles fic #harry styles x reader #harry styles #olivia o'brien #harry styles angst #harry styles imagine #harry styles fanfic

[fanfics4all]

I Hate U, I Love U

Request: Yes / No Draco malfoy x fem reader inspired by I hate, u I love u by Gnash Anon

Requests are closed <3 Have a nice day/night

Draco Malfoy x Fem!Male!Reader 

Word count: 2110

Warnings: Breakup, Sadness, Blackmail 

Y/N: Your Name 

Song: I hate u, I love u by Gnash ft. Olivia O'Brien 

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Masterlist 

(Not my photo, credit to whoever made it!)

Draco and I broke up a few months ago. He broke up with me for what seemed like no reason, but a few days later he started dating Pansy of all people! She was obsessed with him and I suppose he realized he wanted her. I couldn’t help but feel like he used me. I tried to move on, but I always ended up wishing he was Draco. I missed his sweet soft lifts on mine and I wanted that so badly again. Even after months I still feel that pain in my chest every time I see him, especially when he was with her. I needed him in my life, but now he was gone… 

Feeling used, but I'm

Still missing you and I can't

See the end of this

Just wanna feel your kiss against my lips

And now all this time is passing by

But I still can't seem to tell you why

It hurts me every time I see you

Realize how much I need you

I hated him for what he did to me. I loved him for everything he used to do to me. I hated him for being with her. I loved him for giving me part of his heart. I don’t want to at all, but I can’t help having him as my number one. No one could ever be better than him, even still. I hated him for having his lips on hers. I loved him for the way he used to do that to me. I hate myself for still wanting him. I hate that he wants her, needs her. I hate that I’ll never be her…

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I love you

Don't want to, but I can't put

Nobody else above you

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I'll never be her

Draco’s POV

Y/N was still always on my mind. Whenever I found myself awake at odd hours of the night Y/N was there in my mind. In the mornings when I was having a cuppa and I saw her smiling with her friends, I couldn’t help but let her take over my thoughts. On the days that I just couldn’t bring myself to eat because of stress, she invaded my thoughts once again. A few times I thought about how our families had gone on vacation together and Y/N and I would sneak off with a bottle of fire whisky at night. We never could totally remember what the nights consisted of, but sand was always in my sweaters and she had sand in her hair. I wonder if she missed me like I missed her. I was warned I shouldn’t get attached to my best friend like that. That if things went bad we’d lose each other. Now our hearts were broken and we weren’t even friends anymore… 

I’ve been finding myself tired of everything lately. All the stress for school and my family finally catching up to me. However, I never found myself tired of Y/N. She had gone out with another guy a few days after we had broken up and I was hurt. I thought about how if I did that to her she’d be pissed. I tried to talk to her, to get her back because I was jealous of seeing other guys touch her like I would. She didn’t want to talk though, she would always make up an excuse and leave or just leave without a word. I thought about sending her an owl, I even wrote a letter out, but never sent it. It sat in my desk collecting dust. 

Part of me knew she was still in love with me. I saw her stealing glances at me a few times. I’d smile at her when I saw, but she just quickly looked away. The whole school thought she was over me, seeing as she was dating other guys. But the fact that they never lasted more than a month and that she was always looking at me made me realize she was still in love with me. Her friends didn’t have a clue. No one did. But, if she really wanted me, wouldn’t she just tell me? If I was her I would and I would never let me go again. Perhaps it was because I was with Pansy, not of my own free will of course. She had found out I was failing one of my classes and threatened to tell my Father if I didn’t break things off with Y/N and be with her. I couldn’t risk her actually telling my Father, I’d be severely punished if he ever found out. So here I was with Pansy and not the love of my life… 

I miss you when I can't sleep

Or right after coffee or right when I can't eat

I miss you in my front seat

Still got sand in my sweaters

From nights we don't remember

Do you miss me like I miss you?

Fucked around and got attached to you

Friends can break your heart, too

And I'm always tired, but never of you

If I pulled a you on you, you wouldn't like that shit

I put this reel out, but you wouldn't bite that shit

I type a text, but then I never mind that shit

I got these feelings, but you never mind that shit

Oh oh, keep it on the low

You're still in love with me, but your friends don't know

If you wanted me, you would just say so

And if I were you, I would never let me go

Y/N’s POV

I hated him for what he did to me. I loved him for everything he used to do to me. I hated him for being with her. I loved him for giving me part of his heart. I don’t want to at all, but I can’t help having him as my number one. No one could ever be better than him, even still. I hated him for having his lips on hers. I loved him for the way he used to do that to me. I hate myself for still wanting him. I hate that he wants her, needs her. I hate that I’ll never be her…

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I love you

Don't want to, but I can't put

Nobody else above you

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I'll never be her

Draco’s POV

I wish she would just talk to me! I didn’t want to hurt her, I just desperately wanted her back in my arms. I wish I could tell her that Pansy was blackmailing me to date her, but I couldn’t. Pansy was already talking about the possibility of marriage and it was honestly scary. I knew I would never marry her no matter what. My Father’s wrath would be less terrifying than that. I found myself thinking about the possibility of marrying Y/N one day. But then I would see her with her latest boy toy and get pissed. She lied to me. She said I was the only one for her and yet here she is with another guy every month! Seeing this so often led me to drink more and I found myself angry, sad, and in love. I shouldn’t miss her, because it’s clear by her actions that she doesn’t miss me. Maybe I should just let her be. Be distance to her like she is to me. I should stop reminiscing about our past, but I couldn’t help myself. Mother always told me it’s good to have feelings, that I shouldn’t keep them all bottled up. Is our love really gone? Has the trust run out? I suppose I’m moving on in a way, but it doesn’t feel right. I feel more alone than I ever have… 

I don't mean no harm, I just miss you on my arm

Wedding bells were just alarms

Caution tape around my heart

You ever wonder what we could have been?

You said you wouldn't and you fucking did

Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix

Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all fucking mixed

Always missing people that I shouldn't be missing

Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges just to create some distance

I know that I control my thoughts and I should stop reminiscing

But I learned from my dad that it's good to have feelings

When love and trust are gone

I guess this is moving on

Everyone I do right does me wrong

So every lonely night, I sing this song

I hated her for being with different guys. I loved her for how she always knew just what to say to people. I hated that she was moving on. I loved her for that kind heart she always has. I tried loving Pansy the way I loved Y/N but she’s not Y/N and she will never be Y/N. I hated her for letting them touch her the way I was meant to. I loved her for that perfect smile she has. I hated that I wanted her so badly, but she won’t even talk to me anymore. I hated that I was forced to be with Pansy now and that she’ll never be Y/N.

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I love you

Don't want to, but I can't put

Nobody else above you

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I'll never be her

Y/N’s POV

I hated him for what he did to me. I loved him for everything he used to do to me. I hated him for being with her. I loved him for giving me part of his heart. I don’t want to at all, but I can’t help having him as my number one. No one could ever be better than him, even still. I hated him for having his lips on hers. I loved him for the way he used to do that to me. I hate myself for still wanting him. I hate that he wants her, needs her. I hate that I’ll never be her…

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I love you

Don't want to, but I can't put

Nobody else above you

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I'll never be her

I would sometimes sit alone in the common room reading a book, then they would come in and I saw him watching her. He looked at her like she was the only girl in the world and my head broke. Did he ever care about me? Was I just to make her jealous? Was he lying to me this whole time? All alone, watching him watch her. She’s his world now. She’s the only thing he ever sees now. Did he even notice that my heart is breaking more and more? Did he even notice that he’s killing me with those looks?

All alone, I watch you watch her

Like she's the only girl you've ever seen

You don't care, you never did

You don't give a damn about me

Yeah, all alone, I watch you watch her

She is the only thing you've ever seen

How is it you never notice

That you are slowly killing me?

I hated him for what he did to me. I loved him for everything he used to do to me. I hated him for being with her. I loved him for giving me part of his heart. I don’t want to at all, but I can’t help having him as my number one. No one could ever be better than him, even still. I hated him for having his lips on hers. I loved him for the way he used to do that to me. I hate myself for still wanting him. I hate that he wants her, needs her. I hate that I’ll never be her…

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I love you

Don't want to, but I can't put

Nobody else above you

I hate you, I love you

I hate that I want you

You want her, you need her

And I'll never be her

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