#realistic but

[burningthegallows]

sometimes I think about how jk* coded the death eaters as nazis, implied that they would return in generational cycles, and then, with the utter travesty that is that gd epilogue, maintained and reinforced that status quo

and like what

#broke my gd heart #those books were so twisted after year 4 #umbridge was my fav antagonist #because she was so freaking believable #pretty sure my shitty assimilationist high school headmaster #took deliberate inspiration from dolores’s model #but the conclusion with her character was so dissatisfying #like wtf #so nazis will come back and hurt more people #because hurt people hurt people #and politicians will do real evil for the sake of maintaining ‘calm’ #as if calm is what a person should prioritize calm when nazis are also at the table #like such a flaccid reductive result #realistic but #how did jk*s editors let her completely drop the moral center of the books #what editor held her hand in books 1-3 and squeezed a fucking message out of that neo liberalist asshat #the only thing I hate more than a grim dark universe that fetishizes anti semitism #is a kids book that does the same and normalizes it #Harry Potter we salute you #but you were the product of one of a billion monkeys keysmashing #this is mostly #jk* wank #if they deserve it is it wank?? 🤔

[cheddar-baby]

Guinea Pigs Eating a Grass Field

#video #guinea pig #guinea pigs #flashing images #realistic depiction of a panic attack

[great-and-small]

Bird identification is so fucked up in a really fun way you can’t understand until you get into it. For example, there is a type of goose called the cackling goose that looks exactly like a Canada goose except smaller and “cuter”. The cackling goose is way, way, more rare in most places than its relatively common cousin, so it’s on tons of birders life lists. Everyone wants to see a cackling (look in any bird ID group to see lots of hopeful people posting petite Canada geese). The two species regularly commingle, so sometimes a flock of those common parking lot birds will have the equivalent of a Pokémon shiny just hanging out in the middle of them.

How ridiculous and fun is that? I can never look at a big group of Canada geese without scrutinizing their ranks for an adorable little extremely rare cutie pie cackling goose. It reminds me a bit of mushroom harvesting minus the risk of death if you get it wrong

#idk if this is universally true but def relevant here in the eastern USA #birding #yes I know the cackling bill is shorter too but realistically that’s hard to judge sometimes #cackling goose #Canada goose #biology #Canadian goose

[k3yreviewer25]

One of my favorite hobbies is thinking about the fucked up implications of this fantasy world map my parents got me for christmas

[Image ID: photo of a map. On the left side of the map is Middle Earth, with the Shire and Mordor labeled. To the direct right of Mordor is Whoville.]

#like realistically what would this world look like? #is sauron just evil because like the grinch he too had to put up with the who's annoying noises? #could a who be corrupted by the ring's power? #it's so much

[sabertoothwalrus]

UHMMMMM what if T4T labru

#only reason she probably wouldn't use they or neopronouns is cause I can't realistically see them used in that setting. maybe a modern au #I don't think she'd mind being called Laios. or King. #I think he'd like having long pretty hair that looks more like his mama :) #kabru is transmasc kui told me #dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #laios touden #trans laios #kabru #labru #transgender #agender #my art #comic

[lackadaisycal-art]

I'm getting so sick of major female characters in historical media being incredibly feisty, outspoken and public defenders of women's rights with little to no realistic repercussions. Yes it feels like pandering, yes it's unrealistic and takes me out of the story, yes the dialogue almost always rings false - but beyond all that I think it does such a disservice to the women who lived during those periods. I'm not embarrassed of the women in history who didn't use every chance they had to Stick It To The Man. I'm not ashamed of women who were resigned to or enjoyed their lot in life. They weren't letting the side down by not having and representing modern gender ideals. It says a lot about how you view average ordinary women if the idea of one of your main characters behaving like one makes them seem lame and uninteresting to you.

#feminism #media criticism #this doesn't apply to media with large casts of female characters where one or the other is uncommonly outspoken or ahead of her time #and it is dealt with realistically in the setting #im not saying women in the past couldnt be wild and headtsrong and revolutionary #i just think treating it as an essential whenever a female love interest gets added to a historical story about some man is wearing

[redbuddi]

Things that don't exist in Scooby-Doo:

Ghosts

Things that exist in Scooby-Doo:

Jetpacks

Aliens

Instant Hypnosis

Machines that put you in the computer

Realistic hologram technology

Were-Cats

Meteors made of Gold

Self-Aware AI

Underground Egypt Cult

Cthulhu

Soul-Sucking Triangles

Transylvania, PA

Moon Resort

Magical Space Guardians

Transgender Potion

Courage the Cowardly Dog

Warlocks

Ghosts

#scooby doo #theres no such thing as ghosts #scooby doo taught me the real monsters were jetpacks aliens realistic hologram techn

[odetoscavengers]

Something that could have been

#femurs art #carolina parakeet #quagga #great auk #extinct animals #extinct species #this was for a school thing #this series was made for ME #also this isnt supposed to be realistic #so like. i know that thylacines wouldnt make very good hunting companions but that wasnt the point of the piece #thylacine

[ceeejus]

break in the case

#narumitsu #wrightworth #phoenix wright #miles edgeworth #naruhodo ryuichi #mitsurugi reiji #bridge to the turnabout #happy new year! #have been wanting to draw something for this case for a while.. #tho realistically i do not think phoenix sat down from the moment he was released from the hospital until the final verdict was read #but what can ya do

[lazylittledragon]

the only thing scarier than vampire lords/mind flayers/death cults is meeting the in-laws

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #tavstarion #i feel like he’s good at schmoozing but i’m not sure how much he would actually Enjoy it #he gives me extroverted introvert #being surrounded by a few hundred very pretty wood elves for a weekend is probably quite nice though #he might have a bitch sesh with dorian’s sisters #also i will keep making his outfits cuntier if it kills me #what’s that post about how wyll is the only character you could realistically bring home without disaster

[shoomlah]

Thought it would be fun to see how I drew David Tennant 12 years ago vs. now

#david tennant #doctor who #tenth doctor #good omens #crowley #I can still see a lot of my same stylistic quirks! The bits of hair at the temples and the nape of the neck #just with a decade of sloooowly sliding into a more realistic style added into the mix

[tippenfunkaport]

You know, it would be amazing if Hollywood learned the right lesson from the success of Nimona. Something like "Hey, maybe don't throw out a nearly done movie as a tax write off" or "people want queer stories" or even "don't be afraid to take some storytelling risks and be original" but you just know they're going to come away with some absolutely batshit takeaway like, "next time delete all the evidence and burn it to the ground so the gays can't make us look bad!"

#sorry to be cynical on main but all I can think of is instead of watching this and being like wow we made a huge mistake here #disney is just going to be mad because of how foolish this made them look #bc corporate america always learns exactly the wrong lesson #honestly hope I'm wrong and this humbles them and they do better #but also I am a realist #anyway go nimona kick 'em in chip and dale's nuts #nimona #nd stevenson #netflix #disney #oscar nominations #oscar nominee #hollywood

[jowbokitten]

Maid to skate

#realistically he'd fall an his face #cuz he's so cringefail #the amazing digital circus #tadc #jax #tadc jax #tadc fanart #maid jax #my art

[wombywoo]

black tie ♛

#call of duty #cod #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #my art #realistically they've never looked this good in their lives #but a girl can dream~

[gutsby]

Diehard

Pairing: dbf!Joel x Reader

Summary: Joel tries Viagra for the very first time.

Warnings: 18+. Unprotected p-in-v. Erectile dysfunction. Daddy kink. Praise kink if you squint. Overstimulation. Cumplay. She/her pussy pronouns. Pushing physical limits with a pre-negotiated safe word in place for it.

Note: No more limp dick erasure. We die like [old] men.

Part of the Waiting Game ‘verse | Word count: 986

Joel just wanted to prove he could fuck like he used to.

He didn’t think he’d almost kill you in the process.

“JOEL!” you screeched, heels digging deep in the mattress as your climax came in seismic waves.

The stimulation was insane. Normally the much-older man would have been down for the count after two—and usually one—big O, but now his chest was heaving, hips relentlessly beating a punishing pace against your own.

Your walls were slick with not only your cum but his, milky ropes of his arousal making for an obscene set of sounds every time his dick slid in and out of your cunt. You could feel his balls tighten and twitch with every forthcoming spurt of him, practically reeling with the pulse of each new sticky gift inside you. His groans rumbled low, but the power and pleasure and outright primal fervor they conveyed were unmistakeable. You had to look down, feebly, to believe it yourself—Joel never fucked his way through your orgasm and his.

Then you felt a palm slide up the back of your head, and Joel held it up to make sure you watched him fuck you.

“J-Joel,” you whimpered, watching his girth disappear and reappear at least a half-dozen times as you did.

“Just a little more, honey,” he murmured against your forehead. The smack of each thrust was dizzying, “Want my pretty girl nice and full’a me before she leaves, okay?”

Joel never could let you head back to college without a few of his loads and a head full of filthy memories—something to hold you over until your next visit home. You would’ve liked to mumble back, ‘Okay,’ but then your pussy clenched around him, and his thrusts grew faster.

“My sweet girl,” he grinned, “She likes that, huh?”

You could scarcely manage a nod. The weight of your head was held fully by him, and if that wasn’t indicative enough of your fucked-out state, your face surely said the rest. When Joel leaned back to adjust the angle of his thrusts, he caught sight of your hooded, glossy stare and almost came all over again. He slowed his pace for once.

Then he dipped a finger between your body and his, just long enough to douse the tip of his digit with cum. He bottomed out inside you, watched you part your lips in a gentle gasp, and pressed his touch to that open space.

It was almost like you didn’t have the strength to suck. You just let him smear the sticky stuff along your lower lip, gaze plastered to his. Then Joel’s cock sank deeper.

“O-ow!” you whined, partly reanimated by the stretch.

“You can take it,” Joel grunted.

The double entendre wasn’t lost on you. You could, and would, take his finger and his cock inside. You suckled dumbly on the cum-drenched fingertip in assent.

But when Joel’s finger popped out of your mouth and his thrusts picked back up, you weren’t entirely convinced you would be able to hold up the second half of that deal.

It wasn’t fair. He took one magic pill, and poof, his dick stayed hard for half the fucking day. You had nothing but your youth and two shaking legs to ensure your survival. When Joel worked his cock back and forth a couple more times and it seemed your body was about ready to scream, you took hold of his biceps and squeezed tight.

“I can’t.”

“Can’t what?”

The tip of his cock nicked a soft ridge inside you, and you jolted back. Joel’s palm was still pressed to your head, holding you to him, and his hips had you pinned as well.

Instead of answering, you whimpered.

You didn’t want him to stop, but you also weren’t sure if you could handle any more. Your eyes met his, pleading.

“Can’t what?” Joel pressed, a little more sternly.

Another whimper. Inside, Joel’s cock was rubbing that pleasure point raw, and you felt another climax coming.

“Use your words.”

“Too— too—”

Each new thrust was sending stars before your eyes. Joel was one sick man if he tried to make you talk while he fucked you past the point of all intelligible speech.

“Too what? Tell me, baby.”

You’d get that fucker back someday. Joel just grinned.

“Too much,” you hissed when his hips delivered another mind-numbing push. Then, feeling pleasure threaten to peak at almost a painful degree, “Toomuchtoomucht—”

Joel continued thrusting, knowing damn well you knew what to say if you really wanted him to stop. As if to underscore this point, he tipped your head back and made you hold his gaze, features creased with a frown.

“That sure don’t sound like the safe word to me.”

It wasn’t. You knew it wasn’t. He didn’t need to tell you twice, or even breathe a second word besides. With one more brush of Joel’s thick, throbbing, implausibly hard cock, he sent you over the edge and into your fourth orgasm of the morning, hitting that spot again and again.

And again.

And again.

Just like before, Joel fucked you through each wave, catching your lips this time to stifle your cries. You might’ve gone blind for a second or two, but that was alright; the pleasure, proximity, and then the sweet, erratic pulse of his cock sending rope after rope of his cum deep inside made the overstimulation worthwhile.

Your body went limp against the bed, held tight in Joel’s grasp, when you felt that sickly sweet dichotomy of soft, tender touches and a cock lodged between your walls that was as hard as it had ever been. Still trying to console you with kisses, still trying to warm you up for another round, perhaps, Joel almost laughed out loud in your mouth when you groaned into his and whispered:

“Please don’t ever take that fucking pill again.”

#SOMETIMES I WRITE THIS MIDDLE-AGED MAN LIKE HE’S 25 AND JUST NEED TO SHUT THE F*CK UP #*brittany broski voice* BE REALISTIC!!!!!!! #BE F*CKING FOR REAL #FOR A SECOND BE FOR REAL #joel miller #joel miller tlou #joel miller smut #joel miller imagine #joel miller one shot #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #the last of us #tlou #the last of us fic #joel miller x you #dbf!joel miller #dbf!joel

[ato-dato]

*genders your bent*

#this was so fun #women don’t really wear a tie to the office so I tried to give them a realistic alternative #I love them #the next one will have sho and Ritus in it 👀 #are you excited #mob psycho 100 #mob psycho fanart #mob psycho reigen #mob psycho serizawa #reigen arataka #serizawa katsuya #mp100 #mp100 fanart #mp100 reigen #mp100 serizawa #serirei #serizawa x reigen #girl psycho 100 #genderbent #genderbent au #art #my art #artwork #fanart #digital art #drawing #fan comic