#should i have put this ramble on the actual post and not on tags? probably | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

louwhose · 2 years

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Wow, your glass post is stunning! (Did you know that you fit in the weekly prompt 'glass' of @zelinkcommunity with this?)

Also, this is your enabling ask to rant. 😆

Ah! Yay! I'm glad you like it! (I did not know that was the prompt this week because discord scares me I have not been keeping up with the discord, but cool!)

Thank you for enabling my rant, it will go under the cut because... I really have a lot to say about this piece.

I'll begin with mentioning the approximate story (read as: as good as I can remember, which isn't very) of how I got the idea for this project. Back in April. It... took me a while to get to it, but back to that in a bit.

So, I had seen this youtube video about angels. That's important because, mentioned in this youtube video, was something about in artwork, a halo representing divinity. Which inspired me to make this piece (if you look at it please don't judge it as harshly as I did myself I've grown as a digital artist or maybe just gotten more meticulous about trying to do well with my art since then). Then, (the tags on that piece make me more confident about the story) I showed it to my sister and told her about the idea since she had seen the video too and could appreciate it. And she suggested somehow or other doing stained glass art, evoking a similar idea of holy/ divine scenes in-world or whatever.

It was a couple of weeks later that I planned out approximately what I wanted the pictures to be, with the idea to show them all in one photo together (as the final product was). It was... three? four? weeks ago that I planned out very rough pictures of the approximate layout for the windows.

And finally, last Sunday, I started.

Admittedly, I only got the roughest of drafts done before getting distracted by something else, but the rest of the week I kept working and agonizing over it until I finally finished yesterday, a week after I started. And now for the more rant-y part, I'll go over them one picture at a time, because they all had their challenges.

The idea behind this one is the irony of it all. These are meant to be works of holy scenes, or at least important moments leading up to the defeat of Calamity Ganon, right? But the artists (theoretical, in-world ones that supposedly made it and not me) would not necessarily understand everything that happened the way we do, seeing it in the game. They might just see it, and love the idea of her offering devotion to the Goddess constantly, even if the reality was that Zelda was hugging herself, feeling so useless and unheard by the Goddess that she never got her powers.

This was probably the easiest one to do, actually. But I can only say that in hindsight, because it was the first one I did each part for, so it never had the difficulty of the other ones to temper my opinion about it. But the Goddess statue and Zelda were fairly simple, so the hardest bit about the line work was figuring out what to put behind the Goddess statue and in the water. Even the border was so much easier and less repetitive to do than the other ones, but since it took me a little while to figure out what I was going to do for this one, it was actually the second one I did so I actually knew it was easier than the others. No crazy thoughts on the coloring for this one. It was only tedious, which is exactly just what I expected it to be.

The pairing of Zelda replacing the Master Sword on its pedestal to heal and Link drawing it the second time. Obviously, it is a big, momentous moment when the Hero draws it again on his journey as he prepares to fight off Ganon again. But I think it is just as important that Zelda replaces the broken and bruised sword to heal before she returns to the castle in preparation to hold off Ganon and let the land breath until Link comes back. I feel like those two moments, both preparing to go face Ganon, whether to hold him back for a century or to seal him away permanently( ? - permanently for this Princess and Hero, at least, I hope), are both important moments to both themselves and the story, that also beautifully mirror each other. It's no accident that in the picture itself, they are mirroring each other.

First thing to say about the drawing portion of this piece is that it was the research for references for it that I found that scene with the koroks acting out pulling the master sword. And, also, seeing as I had to watch and take adequate screenshots of not one but two cut scenes, that had a lot to use as potential references, it was by far the worst one as far as reference research goes. But once I got to the drawing... it took a little finagling to figure out the exact layout, and I had to convince myself to not include too many korok-related things since it's about the sword and not them, but it was fairly simple. Especially since I could just copy and paste the background and sword before making what little tweaks would be needed for each side. The border was the second-most painful, even with copying and pasting, because going in between the two different flowers was difficult, and I also traced any that I had to resize to fit. So basically a lot of stuff that was entirely my own fault. It is also the first to have any omission of details, but more on that later.

This scene was probably the first one I chose. It's just so obvious, when you're choosing religious scenes for Breath of the Wild, to choose the moment that Zelda awoke her powers.

This is the one that changed the most from what I imagined in my head. But that changed happened before I even sketched out the very initial ideas for this project, because between now and then, I did this sunshine piece (shameless self-promo), where I rewatched the blatchery plains memory and got all the reference I needed even for this project. It wasn't hard to say no, when I've seen it recently enough, that Zelda wasn't holding Link on her lap when she awakened her powers. Which is fine and great, because I love the way it did come out so much better. This was by far the simplest to draw and color, since it's largely so simple, though all the lines of the light beams shooting out or whatever you want to call it did get a little tedious on both parts. The worst thing about this piece (though my opinion on it is greatly tempered by how easy the rest of it was) was that the border was the worst. It was the first border that I did, because it was the only one that I had thought of ahead of time. But with a combination of I-didn't-think-about-it and it-would-work-as-well-for-triangles-anyways I didn't do any copying and pasting and was just struggling with the straight edge tool for a long time. Overall, still my favorite one to do, and I greatly appreciate how it came out.

Now, onto omission of details, because I feel like this is the one where it is most notable, even if it is not the only one. I omitted details for multiple reasons. One of the most obvious ones, I feel, is Zelda's bracelets. I've simply drawn them enough to know that I don't enjoy doing it, so I chose not to, though that specific detail was also partially omitted for the next reason as well. You may have noticed that none of the white lining on Link's Champion Tunic is showing, and that would be because of the (at least supposed) medium. I tried to include as many details as possible, but I felt like embroidery was too much for me/ stained glass. Would it actually be too much for stained glass? No clue, because I've never used that medium, but I tried to do a decent amount of research looking at stained glass pictures for this project, and that was the conclusion I drew. Those are the main two reasons, but there are also some details omitted for reasons of insufficient research/ forgetfulness/ laziness.

Simply put, the Hero of the Wild on his journey. To counterbalance the one of Zelda struggling for her powers. It's supposed to feel like he's still at the beginning of his journey, on the Great Plateau, looking towards Hyrule Castle. Not going to go too much into the thematic importance of this one, simply because I have a whole entire essay about this in my head that I hope to write someday.

Starting with the reference, I suppose: I pulled up Google, typed in "link botw" pressed search. Then it wasn't too hard to find a pic of him in his starter clothes. His clothes, which admittedly have a few details omitted. The drawing on this piece could compete with Zelda awakening her powers if it weren't for one critical thing: THE LEAVES. The tree especially. Let me tell you, I was so glad to be done drawing those. Coloring them was pretty ugh too but not as much. But the border as well. I suppose I would rank it middle of the pack, not as bad as triangles or floral, but still leagues worse than the two easiest. Copying-and-pasting wasn't too bad, both because of the limited variety of what I needed to do it for as well as doing it after the floral border and having some ideas on how to make it easier for that one. The biggest annoyance with the border, however, was the fact that I didn't save for a while when I was doing it and my art program crashed and didn't even autosave anything. So I had to redo a significant portion of the thing, which really annoyed me. All in all, feelings on drawing it land it pretty in the middle of the pack between easiness/ annoyance.

This is what the picture was supposed to be. But they hold the same thematic ground... is what I'd like to say, but the truth is that I didn't think all too deeply about the themes and reasons behind each picture while planning it out. But in hindsight I still hold that it is true that they cover the same thematic grounds, but since there was a window with only Zelda, I wanted to give Link the same courtesy to balance it out a bit more. Once I got the idea for this piece as I was starting to work on this project digitally (not that there were more than those very rough sketches traditionally), I decided to include it either way, knowing that the Link-and-Zelda-on-their-respecitve-journey/mission was the only one that made sense to replace it with. In fact, I even made a template for the final piece of how I would do it with six windows instead of five. But in the end, once I got to it in the course of the line work for the various windows, I saw that scraggly line that I knew was supposed to be malice and knew that I did not want to draw it. And I liked there being five windows better anyhow, so there's that. I still appreciate the general design and what-not for it, but I'm also glad that I didn't have to agonize over during all the agonizing parts like I did for the others, at least.

And finally, the centerpiece. The ultimate moment, the final showdown to close their story (we are ignoring BOTW2 for purposes of this artwork). Defeating Ganon. This would be the most important moment to them, the moment they finally won. The moment Ganon's influence is gone, no longer corrupting and suppressing Hyrule. Well, it's technically showing everything like a moment before everything was dissipated, but that's because you can appreciate the piece more in that context. But this represents when the Goddess' Chosen finally won over Hatred.

I chose this piece as the center for its representative, thematic significance, because in the final product, that is what people will appreciate, and no one will ever truly come close to appreciating all I went through while creating it besides myself, even if they are reading this. But, even if I for some inane reason chose the order of the pieces not on significance or artistic balance or anything like that but instead for my feelings on them after drawing them, then I still would've chosen this one as the centerpiece, solely for how polarized my feelings are on it. Zelda and Link were easy. The sky in different fragments came later, but not at all difficult. The border was easier than all the others by far, and no, it's not supposed to look like Navi, or fairies. It evolved from a couple of suggestions for that border from my sister, circles like the eyes and fire like the vague shape of everything Ganon, combined and sparing because that's what I needed at the time and that's what looked good anyway. Same for coloring on all of them. Even the reference was easy, because I already had the video I needed up for something else (that I was trying to work on but didn't really do it enough).

But Ganon. GANON. If I needed another reason to hate him, I have it now. Because he was so stinkin' difficult to draw. Every stage that I drew him. At first I drew a circle with tusks and eyes. Because I knew it would be. In fact, I didn't even complete drawing his body at all until the line art layer. I can't even imagine trying to do it well in a different style, because I feel like the limitations I had actually helped in this case, because I only had to draw his fragmented body instead of whatever mess that actually was. The only parts of it that were semi-okay were the eyes, tusks, and weird under-bitey teeth. Everything else was absolute misery. Coloring began with the teeth and tusks— the pure black parts. Pure black on glass? Would not have done it had I not seen it on some stained glass I actually saw in real life, as opposed to all the online research I did. But, at the same time, it was black, meaning there literally was no light getting through. Since I was making the color layer overall slightly transparent, I had to do it on its own separate layer, and it had all its own annoyances, all less worse than the rest of Ganon. To prove that it really existed, here's the picture I took of it:

Back to Ganon, for coloring everything else. Ugh. UGH. Ugh. That is the only word to describe it. Even after I figured out all the colors I wanted to use, which was a chore itself. Even after I figure out where exactly to put which colors before actually coloring the whole thing in, which was a chore itself. Just coloring all those small, finnicky, crooked little fragments... It was miserable and took ages. And I suppose here's as good as any place to mention how, to make sure the the colors were... perfect, I always went back, made the linework invisible, filled in any gaps or inconsistencies with it, and then put the linework up again to make sure it was all still in the lines. Horrible enough on the other pieces, but on this one... with all those finnicky fragments... let's just say I was very glad to be done when I was.

But then I finished.

I finished and the result was just so good, so satisfying beyond what the others were, that I almost don't care about any of that. It's my favorite part of the piece. It's my favorite, in spite of all the misery it caused me, or perhaps even enhanced by it. So, yes, I love this one. (Throwing what hatred remains after the product at Ganon because he deserves it and was the cause of most of it anyhow).

And the background ...could be better but this is what happens when I wait 'til the end of a large project like this to do the background. I've been working on everything else the past week and I don't feel like putting much more effort into the project. I wasn't even going to do the backgrounds behind the glass at first, but I wanted to show off the transparent bits more than just the sky. And I tried aligning what was behind each one to be fitting for the glass. The least obvious is probably the first one, meant to be ruins. And now my brain is kinda fried so I'm moving on to finish this.

And the final product. I had to patch up the background a little more than what was there from earlier, and copy the color layer while removing the area of where the linework is before transforming it and lightening it up for the reflection, which really wasn't nearly as bad as I made it sound just there, but it was absolutely the final touch this piece needed. And it really brought everything together, making it so satisfying.

I guess that's the whole point about this, isn't it? How satisfying it is? I may moan and groan and write this whole rant for hours about how these projects take so long and drain you so much, and that's true. But once it's complete? It's so satisfying. And that's why these longer projects are worthwhile.

#I called my sister that gave me the idea and she said she likes it #and then I asked about the cat and she told me he's sleeping on my desk which he's apparently been doing for a week #this is an unapologetically long post but at least I'm aware enough to put it under a read more #ershmergersh this just really made my day #thanks zelmo for the sweet ask and rant enablement!#sorry it's taking so long I had very little of it written before and I had a lot more than that to rant out #for that something else I was trying to work on:#it's a botw2 speculation fic so I have a time limit before it's irrelevant and would greatly appreciate someone to help keep me on track #if anyone's reading the tags and is interested #random: I probably should have had more of a lunch than just cookies but none of the options were appealing so oh well #dinner better be fantastic #another example of my chronic laziness #rant #...but it's actually more like rambling #thank you for coming to my ted talk #lou writes #but more like lou rants amiright?

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anshiel · 2 years

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i've been using emulators lately 2 play old games because and feel like a hacker, feel like a god why didn't i do this earlier oh my god

#anshiel's text posts #feels good man feels natural #wnjoy actually playing old games instead of just looking at videssay or playthrough videos of em #i finished earthbound a few days ago and it's good #now playn some old sonic games #stilll havent finished princess and the pauper on the gba because i wanna stream/record since i feel it's at the end #is also nice since im the kinda guy who's probably not gonna get a console any time soon since expensive #it's also got me thinking maybe i should find some o the old games i played as a kid #since there's ways to also simulate old computer hardware here #hhhhhh but i forgor how slow and difficult that is #TECHNICALLY i downloaded the old moomins game i played in finnish onto my computer from an archive and got it 2 play in a virtual box #via my siblings help #B I FORGOR HOW SLOW THIS WAS AND THAT I HAVE 2 PUT IN THE COLORS #fr gods sake how did i use slow ass computers back in the day #nways idk where im going w this ramblings #thanks fr reading the tags #now i also know why so many o my fave games were inspired by earthbound #i tried watching a playthrough a few years bvack b the game is a bit 2 slow fr that for me or the playthrough goes thru text 2 fast #yeah

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public-trans-it · 1 month

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i was a trans man until after a lot of build up of doubting myself, i finally realized that we are putting ourselves further into boxes by not accepting that we are the biological sex that we are and we can do WHATEVER we want at the same time.

clothes and makeup and certain interests do not equal gender.

and not liking being a woman is an unfortunately natural symptom of puberty and/or experiencing society’s deeply ingrained misogyny. and everyone deserves support for those problems.

but we can all fight together against gender social constructs in a healthy way without prescribing people hormones and invasive cosmetic surgery to make them more like the sex they “should” be according to… social constructs…. and help them be comfortable in who they are

Alright. Its been like 9 fucking months that I have been staring down this ask. What better time than to give TERFs some nuance than right in the middle of a fucking hate campaign going on where people (well... singular person probably) are calling me a TERF. This wont backfire.

This post arrived in my inbox shortly after I made another post about gender, and just how fucking weird it can be, and how I genuinely believed every single person on this planet has a fascinating relationship with gender, and so much nuance and personal identity in theirs. Even cis people. Even TERFs. In the tags, I even begrudgingly encouraged TERFs to talk about their gender on that post if they wanted. I genuinely think that TERFs do have really cool relationships with gender. As I mentioned in those tags, the quickest way to explode a group of TERFs is to get them to start talking about their own relationships with gender, and see how vastly different it is, and watching them stab each other in the back over it. So I told them to ramble away about how they view gender, as long as they stayed the fuck away from the rest of the blog WHICH THIS ANON CLEARLY FUCKING IGNORED.

But... this anon does bring up another topic I want to talk about.

Detransition.

I am a huge supporter of detransitioning. This is... surprisingly... not a very common stance in the trans community, and it breaks my fucking heart. Like, I get it. I understand why. A LOT of detransitioners, like the person in this ask, end up weaponizing their feelings of gender against other trans people.

My support of transition comes from the intersection of two very central beliefs of mine:

Everyone should explore their gender without feeling a need to commit! This is a pretty common belief in the trans community! Damn near universal in fact! We even have a fun little term we use for people who decide to play around with gender, only to end up a bit closer to where they started and being perfectly happy with that: Cis+. Someone who is cis, but at least put in the work to understand the trans experience, and actually CHOOSE to remain Cis instead of just defaulting to it with societal pressure. Many trans people are much more comfortable around 'Cis+' people, because they know these are people who have taken the time and put in the work of being an ally. Self examination isn't easy, especially not publicly, and doing so is genuinely one of the strongest ways a Cis person could ever show their support.

It is never too late to transition. This is also a pretty common belief in the trans community! It is... sadly not quite as universal though. But it is something very important that needs to be said. You could be 80 years old, sitting in a retirement home, and go "You know what? I think I'd rather wear a dress and be treated like a lady. I don't want to be buried as a man." And I think every single trans person should have that freedom!

I was discussing this with @thydungeongal the other day, far more paraphrased than this post, and she said something incredible that has been knocking around in my head ever since.

"Gender is an ongoing process"

Those five words they said to me sum up my feelings far more than this entire post could. Gender IS an ongoing process. My gender has changed SO MUCH over the past three decades. From the straightjacket of assigned gender that I was once forced into; to the very stylish and still lovable finely tailored suit of femininity that grew a little too stuffy to wear constantly, even though I do still enjoy it and try it on from time to time; to the wonderful and freeing losely fitting clothing of being aegogender, finally feeling free to be myself and just act naturally and feel natural without having to keep up an appearance!

And I think, there is no length of time you can try out being trans, and trying out new genders, before eventually coming to the realization you were cis all along. Even if you started HRT. Even if you got SRS. Heck, I don't even think you should have to call yourself trans to do either of those things in the first place, why would I be upset that someone did them and then realized they weren't trans? No single moment in your life should EVER lock your gender in place into some unchanging, set in stone thing.

So I support detransitioners completely, with my entire heart. They deserve just as much support as every other 'Cis+' person out there.

So anon, while many people may hate you and lash out at you for detransitioning, I want you to know, that I am not one of them. It sounds like your detransition might have been forced by peer pressure, which is heart breaking to hear. No one should ever force their own gender expectations on another. I hope that wasn't the case. I hope you came to the decision yourself, after realizing whats right for you. I will never give you hate for your detransition.

I WILL ABSOLUTELY GIVE YOU HATE FOR BEING A FUCKING TERF THOUGH. YOUR OWN EXPERIENCE WITH GENDER DOES NOT GIVE YOU THE RIGHT TO POLICE THE GENDER OF OTHERS, FUCK OFF. GET THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!

#I think I'm gonna start doing that for Read Mores #so you can find your place easier after click it #since my 'style' in these long posts is like... a fairly longish NON-readmore post. followed by the actual readmore. Let me know if it work #text essay #gender #detransition #I uh... also have some more... complex feelings of detransitioning #that may be a LIIIIIIITTLE more controversial.........#none of it goes against what i said here #its more personal stuff with my own gender and how detransition specifically is something that exists not as gender itself #but as the societal perceptions of a persons gender #but thats a more complex topic that I'll add on to this at another date #also I am absolutely taking this ask at face value for the sake of this post #but I am not so naive as to believe that the blatant TERF that sent it was being genuine #this is ABSOLUTELY the kind of thing they send people to drive a wedge in the community #I'm not even going to fucking dignify that part of it with any mention in the body of this post #edit: ........... okay the readmore accidentally moved somehow #I fixed it now though

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antimony-medusa · 9 months

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Hi! To preface: I don't think there's any one right or wrong answer to my question necessarily, but I value your opinion as a level-headed adult in this fandom who can probably provide sensible input on the issue I'm having, so I thought I'd ask.

If a CC asks for their character not to be drawn (specifically referring to fanart, which they likely saw on Twitter) in a sexualised way, what does that mean for written fanwork content? Is it "wrong" (putting this in quotation marks since that's a loaded word, to say the least) to write nsfw content about said character and post it on Ao3, considering the differences in visibility/CC knowledge of those platforms, as well as the general consensus/expectation that CCs don't generally read fanfic anyway? Where is the line between "you should respect the CC's wishes" (avoiding the word "boundaries" since that's also very loaded in mcyt spaces) and "you can do whatever you want forever; fanworks are created by and for fans, not for the creators" drawn? Does "just don't put it where they can see unless they go looking" (i.e. correctly tagged on Ao3, not on a CC-frequented site like Twitter) apply? Would it be better not to do it at all, or only create and share said content in private spaces like Discord? Or is this all a "there is no single 'morally correct' answer, make your own personal judgement" thing?

(Sorry for the long-winded question but this is genuinely something I'm struggling with right now, lol. As I said I value and respect your opinion and views about these kinds of things in fandom, so if you have anything to say on the matter I'd appreciate your input!)

Alright so, obligatory warning for discourse on this one right at the top, and possibly also long post. These tend to be me rambling.

This is a situation that I think it's fair that a lot of people disagree. Your personal comfort level with making NSFW content in general is not where my comfort level is, we can come to totally different equilibriums. And then you add in creators expressing that they don't like seeing NSFW content of their characters, and people end up in a whole lot of different places, whether that's a complete no on shipping or NSFW, or people feeling fine to consume it but not create it, or only if it's archive locked, or only specific ships or smps, or whatever. I think it's fine that we don't all agree on this, creation is a fickle beast and we are in a weird place as a fandom of being not rpf but kinda cousins, and we can get *really* close to the creators with twitch and twitter, so people's comfort level in meshing all the parasociality and roleplay and real life of it all can end up in a lot of different places.

I just think that the most important thing for the fandom being a healthy place to spend time on the internet is that we don't go aroud sending hate/abuse to those we disagree with. a) i don't agree with internet mobs or suicide baiting or anon hate in general, b) the number of times I have seen internet games of telephone happen when it comes to this subject is unreal. To use an example from literally today, I saw someone saying that Pac of qsmp pacmike was uncomfortable with shipping art and fic and we all should stop shipping immediately, and once I tracked it back to its source, it turns out that what had happened was the creator said that he wasn't a fan that all the art was of him in the jumpsuit that used to be his skin, he has a new skin now, which turned into sexy jumpsuit art was the problem, which turned into pac hates all sexy fan art, which turned into "pac is being bombarded with nsfw art and shipping and he hates it". Now he might actually also not like NSFW art, but that's not actually what he was adressing, but it was certainly what was being circulated! So like, people warning me off of certain subjects— how do I know that they're actually accurate or if twitter just went twitter on a passing mention of something someone said on a twitch stream?

So I think it's way way way healthier for us as a fandom to sometimes disagree on the subject of "what we're drawing/writing about" and when that happens we implement Don't Like; Don't Read, and we just ignore that, or block if necessary. Don't Want To See it? Simply Don't See It. It's a bad idea to start hate campaigns for sinners, and half the time it's based on bad information anyways.

But in cases that you do know that the creator doesn't want to see that, you found an accurate clip? So this is a case where I think that there's no single moral answer to this that everyone is gonna agree on. We're all coming at it from too many different cultural backgrounds and different streamers in mind and comfort levels with NSFW in general. I don't think there is a firm answer that is gonna make you morally safe. But my personal feelings is that in cases where we know the creators doesn't want to see that, I think the important part there is that the creator never sees that, not that we stamp it off the internet entirely.

I do think, personally, ymmv, that you are not necessarily doing anything morally wrong with drawing or writing NSFW of someone's character, even if they think it's weird. There's a long history of creators saying "you can't do [this] with my characters," and it happens to be you can't [make them gay] enough to make me uncomfortable in general principle with saying creator of the character gets to call the shots in all settings forever. This happened with Anne Rice and with the supernatural fandom and like— it's the internet, we get to make the characters be gay together. This is the making sex jokes about fictional characters website, and Ao3 is the making porn about fictional characters website. I think it's fine if it exists on the internet, the question comes down to one of what we're forcing the creator to see, or what we're putting where they'll stumble upon it. Like, examples from real life— if you have a friend who's vegan, it's polite to not spend time rhapsodizing about how good meat is around them, and if you know that meat makes them sick, it's polite to do a meatless meal around them. That's a human person you want to be okay around you. But that's their boundary for their life, not yours, so even when you're being polite you have no obligation to go vegan when they're not around. And they have a politeness obligation to not walk into a steakhouse and freak out because there's meat there. They have a boundary for their life, and I'm going to respect it, but my life is a different story, and they need to take reasonable steps to protect their boundaries and not just expect everyone else to conform to them.

Or walking by someone on the street and waiting till they're out of earshot and then going "jesus christ that guy was hot" to your friends— that's fine. That's normal human behaviour. What becomes rude is when you make it hot guy's problem and yell at him. Being attracted to someone in your own space is not a problem. I'm aroace, I am not going to be in a relationship with anyone. I'm not going to ban having crushes on me, as long as you don't make it my business. Talking about an attractive person in your own space is not a problem. Being sexual in your own space— and again we are talking about fictional characters, the way I see it, these are lies we're telling about folks that are not real, who live in little minecraft worlds— that's fine. The problem is if we start catcalling people about it.

When you walk into fandom spaces you are walking into a space where we all like taking fictional guys and telling stories about them and a good portion of those stories are going to include kissing. That is not necessarily baseline normal for like, all of humanity, but people talk about tv shows they watch as one of the classic work small talk techniques. Fandom takes the "I hope ted gets together with jessica" "no he needs to work on himself first" discussion and writes stories, is all, to share with each other. Privately. On our special private website where there's a button you can click to hide your work from search engines and another one to hide it from logged-out users. If you log into the website and search things up, no tags blocked, what you find is on you for saying "I will see literally anything that exists on this subject in a space meant for literally anything". You will find gore. You will find kissing. You literally just opted in to seeing it. That's on you.

So like, there's my little defense of nsfw work existing in general, I think it existing is not a problem. I do think that we should keep it FAR AWAY from streamers. They get to set the rules for their spaces, and if someone doesn't want to see sexualized fan art, I do think we should make sure that in a reasonable way, they never have to see sexualized fan art/fic.

So like me personally, I'm going to hit that Ao3 button to hide my work from search engines, and anything NSFW (or shippy, depending on the person) is not going to go into the main tags on tumblr or twitter or anywhere I'm aware that the creators ever check that tag, and I'd probably archive lock it if the creator had publically mentioned being uncomfortable with it, and if I was regularly posting NSFW I'd block the creators on social media with any account I discuss NSFW with. I want to make sure that I am talking to my friends about the cubitos, not catcalling someone.

And I would probably err on the side of caution when it comes to social media sites that creators are on? Okay so the fandom has a habit of saying that NSFW and Shipping is BAD and can't exist, on the one hand, but on the other hand it says that anything that isn't Bad Wrong Shipping/Explicit NSFW is fine, which leads to like— extremely sexy thirst trap art being drawn and then the creators are tagged. People putting family dynamic fics that really pushes that envelope in the main tag. Gahhhhhh????? No? Don't do that?

I think it would be healthier in the fandom if we did a lot more going "this is for the fandom, not the creator" and we don't tag creators on twitter, and we took our little kissing fics, or gore, or kidfic, or neurodiverse headcanons, or anything else it might be not for the creator to see, and we kept it in fandom spaces and away from creators. But Ao3 is that fandom space that you have to opt into, it's literally archive of our Own, for fans, in that space as long as you tag it you're good.

So the TL;DR of this all is that my opinion is that if you tag it correctly on Ao3 you're fine. Maybe archive lock it. Keep it off twitter. Don't make it the streamer's problem, and you're good.

#discourse #fandom meta #ask #anon #long post

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azulas-lightning-bolt · 2 months

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guys I just want you to know that azula is my fav atla character (right above katara/toph/suki can you tell I like girls) but I’m actually going insane about mako right now.

also for the like,, five people who liked my last mako post please please please go look at @/jade-of-mourning’s blog. they’re so cool. they make such super awesome mako posts and his writing is really good and she also posts some stuff on ao3 so like. yeah. I’m obsessed with them.

anyway back to losing my mind over mako,, (a LOT more under the cut)

so okay I’ll admit I’m not typically a fan of angsty male characters (zuko is the exception. he’s too funny to not, and his character and development are really well done) because they all feel like copy-pastes of each other and they’re generally uninteresting.

but mako. mako is the female experience. not sure if I reposted it (as I tend to do with,, everything on here) but I saw a post talking about how what happened to mako’s character (all potential being discarded after romantic plot) is what happens to the vast majority of female characters. and as I’ve probably said at least fifty million times, he’s SO eldest daughter coded. I’m trans (they/he) but I grew up an eldest daughter and he’s like?? literally me??

as I was yapping about in a reblog—I just checked (lol) and it was in fact the post about mako having the female love interest treatment and tags about his eldest daughter syndrome—mako is somewhat made more ‘relatable’ than katara even when sending a similar message for the general audience. I think people should just be less brickheaded and appreciate my wonderful waterbending girl but mako being a guy makes people not immediately put his character into the lens of ‘ugh, dumb feminism’. (which, again, should not happen)

okay so why does this redeem him so much? I said I hate copy-paste angsty backstories meant to exacerbate a character’s edgy mysteriousness and mako is literally batman with a more violent aang for a little brother. he was basically the messiest character on the show, cheated on both his gfs with each other and fucked them up so bad they turned gay for each other (which was funny as hell of the writers by the way. his reaction to them coming out in the comics was GOLD. ik my boy was fighting back tears.) so, logically, I should hate him like 90% of the fandom, right?

well obviously 90% of the fandom HAS NOT WATCHED THE FUCKING SHOW is MISOGYNISTIC or HATES CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

I have. so much to say about this.

for one. did we watch the same show. mako is one of the most selfless, hardworking, and considerate characters, which he shows multiple times—it’s a major point of his character, actually. he’s the protector, the nurturer (*cough* the eldest daughter). down to his backstory, he shielded bolin from the worst bits of the underworld as best he could while still providing. from eight years old, all alone, he provided. that’s honestly what sets mako apart from literally being Batman (lmao) and why I don’t actually mind his backstory. he was put in an impossible situation, and told to figure it out. he was given no reprieve from the extremely traumatic event of watching his parents die by the element he wields, the one that he has to learn on his own to use to protect bolin.

the other thing is that a lot of his actions are selfish in a way. he doesn’t really care much about the street rats in the same position he was once in the beginning. but even that selfishness isn’t in his own interest—it’s selfishness for the sake of bolin’s well being. one thing that really hits me hard is the brothers’ relationships with food while on the streets. I’m going to make another post about that soon because I don’t want to ramble too endlessly on here. it’s really personal because. eldest daughter who grew up poor. yeah.

second, fandom misogyny. this makes like. no sense but I swear I know what I’m talking about. okay so misogyny is about gender right? but let’s step away from the cutout copy idea of gender, like genitals or fem/masc presentation or pronouns. think of gender as a set of inherent preconceptions, ideals, or societal expectations. that’s what it is but specifying that makes more sense. mako is a dude who is referred to with he/him and he looks like a guy but he represents a girl. mako is expected to be nurturing but not overbearing. present but not annoying. a provider, but don’t ask for anything in return. mako can’t cry in front of bolin, it’s not right for a little boy to look up to someone fragile. mako needs to work, but tiredness is not allowed. don’t be overly cheerful, it’s annoying and unfitting, but too much gruffness is just haughty.

did you feel like you were reading the transcript for that scene about how hard it is to be a woman in the barbie movie? good, because that was the intention. mako, to me, represents the idea of a sibling who is forced to also be a parent, whether or not they are the eldest, and often a girl to a boy. it could be because parents are absent or dead or bad at parenting or just foolish and inattentive. mako is hated (aside from that messy ass romance plot) for almost all the same reasons as katara and that just. infuriates me. like I have this one perfect representation that reminds me of my own background (sorry katara ily and you represent my rage) while aligning with my identity and everyone is shitting on it?? fuck mako haters he’s my special boy

last point. have you never heard of character development in your lives. did you not all love Zuko’s redemption arc, and then as soon as a dumb teenager who’s never had romantic relationships fucks up JUST AS BAD AS THE OTHER TWO PEOPLE INVOLVED (sorry korrasami ily but y’all were nasty for not asking to kiss mako) you’re all like ‘unforgivable’?? like he didn’t even have a redemption arc because HE WASNT AN EVIL CHARACTER. he was a poor kid looking for a sense of stability and he fucked up. he felt bad. I don’t think any of them apologized, despite the fact one was needed all around. he grew as a character because he let himself find stability and mature before seeking someone new to use as a life raft who was already sinking themselves. I truly believe that korrasami—had it not occurred at the end of the series—wouldn’t have worked out either.

all of them were unstable and lost and scared for their lives almost constantly. that’s not a healthy place to be in to seek a relationship and they none of them were good for each other until they gave themselves time to step away from romance and heal.

anyway stan mako to not be a bigot (im unwell about him)

#mako lok #lok #tlok #legend of korra #mako tlok #mako

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unhappytimeleaper · 1 year

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Word Count: 1,320+

Yes. This is self-indulgent because I already had half of it written on some Discord server from my 1 am ramblings, and I was thinking about it again.

I left the server I was in that initially kinda took up all my focus from writing; I don’t know if that means I’ll post more or not cause really, I’m just back to feeling lonely and not motivated. It means now I just don’t have people to talk to about games or other media I love, but oh well. I’ll force all of you to listen to that I was replaying Our Life and XOXO Droplets, and I love the characters. All I wanna do now is play those games on repeat.

Also, so like, platonic yandere’s aren’t always my favorite to write, but I love platonic yan Ortho. There is something so fun and scary about it. It is kinda ironic, but Ortho and Kalim are some of my favorite yandere in TWST; not really my favorite characters, but I think they are so scary in a fun way in a non-traditional way, but both kind of align in the same vein. Regardless I do plan on focusing on Ortho in this post, but one day maybe I’ll get to Kalim.

Ortho Shroud; Unedited. Gender Neutral Reader.

Warnings; yandere content, light manipulation and guilting if you’re sensitive to that. Incase you can’t read and need to see it again this is platonic; think more babysitter-siblings dynamic.

This blog is 17+ please have your age in your bio or tagged; any ageless blog and below the age asked for will be blocked at the end of the week.

What makes Ortho stand out is that he is a kid. In every sense, as fancy as his technology is, as much as it's hard to perceive him as just a kid under all that gear, that's what he is. It's easy to forget since he can come off as ‘beyond his years’ at time. Even more than that, it's easy to forget how needy kids are. In every aspect of what it means to help others grow into essentially good adults, although there is the problem, Ortho will never reach that stage, and no matter what positive approach you take to his overbearing habits, they end up blending back too much with the childish sentience he's adopted.

Ortho probably has learned a handful of his more harmful traits from Idia, although we can't say the negative aspects from other students probably haven't also caused some damage. However, where certain things might differ is that Ortho's actions never come from a place of wanting to harm you or even anger, unlike some of the others whose yandere traits are brought forward more when experiencing an influx of negative emotions they wish to also make your experience. Ortho takes all of these emotions and processes them through a childish lens— one who becomes horribly clingy and desperate for attention/validation. As much as technology can help download guides about emotions, the "proper" way to handle jealousy/fears/loneliness, and worse, access the opposite files of what should be done for immense feelings, none of it can be put to practical use. Reading about it doesn't solve the problem; instead, Ortho can only verbatim read out information rather than put it to use from what is left of his little kid brain. Much like any young person, just hearing about how to handle situations regarding emotions doesn't actually mean they can use those tools until taught. Ortho just lacks someone to teach him how to process these feelings and the ability to innately comprehend them.

It's not like anyone has an issue with Ortho, they always play nice, but Ortho can tell it's not the same as how they treat each other. He feels it in his... gears... and hears it in their voices, he may be unable to verbalize the differences, but it's something he is at least cognisant over. He knows his brother loves him, and he loves him too, but Idia is locked away so often it gets lonely. And it's hard for him to connect with others on campus other than when trying to help; most don't want to play babysitter [even if everyone is well aware that’s not what Ortho needs or wants but how else are you gonna have a friendship with a kid], and even then, knowing how to interact with a dead child-robot AI is more than a little… off-putting at times. The world is at his fingertips, and no one really has worked with Ortho on what is left of his human side, making everything personal hard to connect with.

So if Idia needs his… space… Ortho comes clinging to the next best person. You! The newbie; the person who seems to not really have a preset concept of his creation and works to mainly treat him for what he is. A kid. And for the most part, he's great to have around— he's kind, easily fascinated [thus easily entertained], and genuinely seems to want to help those around him without expecting anything in return. It's an enjoyment to what, in your terms, would be similar to babysitting the lil robo boy, even to the point you might go to Idia asking if it's okay to take him off his hands to do something. What once was an occasional thing slowly started becoming routine. While it's easy to treat him like any other kid, there are some benefits you get to reap having him being some sort of "friend," like him helping you with the bit of school work you might have [his searching functions are so much better than trying to use some textbooks that probably are growing something].

Well, it's all great until his little brother tendencies get out of hand. Overtly clingy and easily jealous of anything that can take your attention away. Trying to read? Sorry, Ortho wants to play; you'll help him with this techno thing he found. Right? He reaalllly wants to do it together, please? Your other dorm friends come to hang out? But you said you'd spend the day with him [even though you're pretty sure you didn't], and he has a hard time fitting in when you all hang out… didn't you say you'd take him to the amusement park after Idia got too nervous about going?

The grip he has with his arms around yours is starting to hurt, bone-crushing and cutting off the circulation to your hand… it's hard to not give in to him just to get him to loosen up. The grin he has when you agree, noting you'll let the others know you can make it results in a fractured smile. You know he doesn't mean any harm, and you are genuine with that sentiment. He doesn't know how crushing his grip can't get or that you don't want to play babysitter 25/8. That as much as you like spending time with Ortho, it's the same as others— you can't really be "friends" in a traditional way and sometimes want to connect with others your own age. It gets to the point though Ortho doesn't see this as a friendship. No, you're more like another sibling to him, right. One who can do all the others sibling things, Idia cannot deal with his own issues-- you aren't replacing Idia in his life but adding onto the experience. And now you have a family here, which makes it much less isolating than when you just have friends. There isn't a reason to try to find a way home now; you have one with your new brother. Ortho likely doesn't even know his actions are manipulative or isolating; he's just a very needy kid who lacks motivation beyond wanting a connection with someone. Anyone. But it's hard to bring up these issues with someone so young, who, when you do, barely can understand and, when pushed as you've been warned, can do severe damage from facing these "big emotions" like rejection. Being robotic and so powerful doesn't mix well with the feelings of a small child; these fears only experienced with Idia being in what was considered danger before but have grown to include you. More than just danger now, too; it's jealousy, it's rejection, it's anxieties.

Before you know it, you're pretty much completely isolated. Ortho is so, so happy to have a new friend, and over time, you've gotta pretty close with Idia as Ortho loves dragging you to spend the day with him too. It's gotten to the point where updates and equipment for Ortho can only be done if he knows your nearby as well. It's comforting to have his… psudeosibling… best friend there when he's done. And as you sit there weeping at how much of a mess it's become, Ortho will be there to comfort you— he doesn't understand why you're upset, but it's his duty to make you feel better, and he'll go as far as he can't to bring back those happy days spent with him. This time Idia can really be involved… don't cry anymore. You have the two of them to make it all better. Right?

Also, things get really bad; Ortho tries to play matchmaker with you and Idia. Make the sibling thing official. That creates a whole different mess. This could go two ways depending on if Idia is also Yandere, but I also think it's funny to explore an Idia who has no interest in you romantically, but little yan Ortho just wants you to be officially connected to him. Not just some weird babysitter-friend but family! Official family, then you really wouldn't be able to shake him from your life. Of course, all of that is suited to a different post.

#twst.leaps #yandere #yandere fanfiction #yandere x reader #yandere character #yandere writing #yandere twst #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere ortho #yandere ignihyde #tw: yandere #if I see even one person misinterpret that this is not platonic I am burning this site down #yandere headcanons

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theboy-thebitch-thelegend · 3 months

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if u dont want my long ass rambling about Alastor, and some minor spoilers, dont look 😅 but he's my blorbo and therefore i'm studying him like a fucked up little bug (affectionate)

I see Alastor's character as a combination, mainly, of three main traits/motivations, plus one that i'm more guessing on but wouldnt surprise me:

1. he lacks empathy. this isn't a moral judgment, just a trait he displays

2. he seeks freedom above all else, but if asked, would rather admit to seeking power above all else. i believe his attempts to gain power are (consciously or not) a means to the end of freedom, not vice versa

3. he sorts people (demons, angels, whatever) into two categories: those he has control over, and those he doesnt. he is capable of respecting and forming relationships with only the latter category. not saying theyre healthy relationships, but they are often at least somewhat functional and prove lasting

...

the fourth (speculation) is that he hates himself lmao. which i think gets very intertwined with number 3. he's very self centered, that's just his view of the world(s). he has more respect for people who he has trouble controlling because he sees them as being in the same category as himself (as opposed to them being in the broader general category of a puppet audience beneath him). however he's not able to feel anything much deeper for them, because if his only lenses are "idiots" vs. "people like me", well. he has no respect for the former and no capability for love of the latter.

...

i think his inability to feel empathy or love leads him to have interesting motivations. freedom through power is perhaps the main one, as i mentioned. but when he first came to the hotel he stated his main goal was to be entertained. while he definitely had additional motives, i do think that was a true statement.

i think he's fascinated by Charlie because, well. she's the princess of hell. she should theoretically be one of the most powerful beings there. she *could* rule hell with an iron fist, if she wanted. but she doesnt. and i think Alastor wanted to see what that was about, i think it intrigued him.

right off the bat, she refuses to make a deal with him. that choice solidly places her in the "people he respects" category, by virtue of her keeping grasp on her own power and freedom. since that's Alastor's main goal for himself, it makes sense that he is drawn to others who manage to achieve it. if she'd taken a deal, the rest of the season wouldve gone way differently.

and probably, not as entertainingly.

one of the key parts of entertainment is that you don't quite know what's going to happen next. for a control freak like Alastor, that's hard to come by, unless he himself *is* the entertainment (which is a big part of his character). but he stated he came to the hotel to BE entertained. i see that as an admission that he didnt know what to expect from the hotel. which, coming from a powerful being, is quite a compliment- almost a statement that he believes in them.

i think Charlie challenges those fundamental categories that he puts people in. he can't sort her into either one. he can't control her, but she's nothing like himself. he knows she has something he doesn't. and unlike most other people, it's not something he can take from her to acquire for himself:

the ability to love.

as i said in the tags of a post i just reblogged:

#i think its interesting that the night before the fight tho when he's talking about getting used to the lot of them #it almost seemed a bit wistful #like i always knew he was fighting for his own goal whatever that may be #and yes he'll make alliances and stay loyal to them #but i really do think he was starting to wish it could be deeper than that #i dont know if he considers himself capable of it #we know he has old friends #not just strategic alliances but what actually appear to be friendships by every outward definition #but i dont think he's allowed himself (or believed himself able to) actually *feel* something for them #even when he can and will play the role of a friend and ally for various reasons #i think the hotel started to 'work' on him more than he anticipated #he didnt quite get to the point of truly feeling love for them #loyalty, protectiveness, willingness to avenge- yes. but he didnt feel love for them quite yet #but i think he wanted to. #ultimately he still was fighting for freedom (and i think his attempts to gain power are to that end, not vice versa). but i think he #did at least *want* to feel love even if he wasnt quite able to yet #and i think thats the only reason he didnt die.

in the battle, he lost his microphone, which represented his power, the measure of freedom and control he was able to claim: it's literally a tool to amplify and broadcast one's voice. by most reasonable calculations, he shouldve died. instead, his power and freedom was "killed"- but yet he wasn't.

the hotel didn't quite redeem him just yet: but i think it made him consider things he never had before.

...

i found it interesting that there was no big fuss about his return. they had to all assume he was either dead, or deserted them. he had to know that they would assume one or the other: and neither one looks good on him. yet he confidently just shows up again and falls right back into the group. whether he realizes it or not, he knows on some level that they will accept him back.

he might not be able to love himself, and he might not be able to love them- maybe not yet, or maybe even not ever. but some part of him knows that they love him. and accepts it enough to go back without shame.

some might read that as more of a strategic move to keep furthering his own ends. and actually tbh i think *he* only sees it as that.

but there *is* more to it than that. there *is* love there, and he's connected to it in some way, which is probably a first for him. and i think/hope that *thats* what will end up being the key to his freedom.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #alastor #the radio demon #i'm so normal about him. if u couldnt tell #😅

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auxiliarydetective · 2 months

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We've done it!

Or, more accurately, you've done it! Thanks to you, my fellow Tumblrinas, I've actually managed to hit 200 followers!

I never thought I would get this far, but I'm eternally grateful for all the love you've given me, and I can't wait to share many more brainrots with you!

In tune with that, I've decided: Why not let you look even further into my mind? I've given you lots of writing, but why not provide some visuals? And so, in thinking about what I wanted to do for my 200 followers celebration, I came up with...

⁕ Evie's Mind Palace Festival! ⁕

(Placing a cut so this doesn't get too long ^^)

As depicted in this lovely graphic above, I'm going to be focusing on my OCs' fashion for this little event. But not just that! I'll get to the bonuses later :)

For now, text version! Because Tumblr likes not loading images and some people may not be able to view the image

↬ Step 1: Pick an OC of your choice! From my OCs, that is. Hope that was clear. Anyone from the list. I'll even throw in a little bonus and say that unintroduced OCs are allowed! That means the ones on this list AND ones I may have rambled to to you in a chat we've had.

↬ Step 2: Pick an occasion prompt! The prompts are as follows:

Casual (aka everyday wear, aka their basic character design or an alternate outfit or it)

Formal

Training/Athletic

Battle (this may overlap with either 1. or 3. for some characters, but let's assume they actually get geared up for battle)

Hot weather (your typical summer clothes)

Cold weather (sweaters, winter coats, you name it)

Swimwear

Canon event (may overlap with some other categories, but I made this a separate thing for the lore opportunities it provides) - Make sure to specify what canon event you want!

Stealing clothes - You can include who the character should steal from in your ask, otherwise I will pick the victim myself.

Holiday-themed - Pick your holiday! Any holiday counts.

Fandombend - Pick your fandom! (This will probably come with some headcanons on what the OC would be like in the new fandom)

Inspired by a song - Please, pick a song! Preferably from the OC's playlist. I should have a playlist for almost every OC. Hop into the "#playlist" tag on my blog to find them and, if they're not posted over there anywhere, tap on any playlist that's there, let it take you to my Spotify profile, and hop into the "Character Playlists" folder!

↬ Step 3: If you want, pick an extra prompt! Your options are:

Historical - Please specify your time frame! You don't necessarily have to, but I tend to be an indecisive little gremlin, so it would make things a little easier if you could pick ^^"

Fantasy (This, of course, makes little sense if the OC is already in a fantasy setting)

Sci-fi (Once again, this makes little sense if the OC is already in a sci-fi setting)

Steampunk

Cultural - Please pick a culture for me to take inspiration from! It doesn't have to be a real-life culture. For example, you could pick Japan for some kimono art or you could pick the Kuja from One Piece!

Color prompt - Pick your color! I ask that you do keep it at one color so that I have some more freedom, and I won't take specific hex codes either because those specific hex codes might clash with the OC's color palette

Prompt of your choice - This can be literally anything! Yes, also an occasion, in which case it would replace your original occasion prompt. I just didn't have the space to add in all occasions known to man, so if you have another idea, this is where to put it.

↬ Step 4: Send your ask! Done!

Once you've sent your ask, please keep in mind that it might take me a while to answer it. I'll then make a collage/moodboard and get the ask posted. Maybe, I'll also draw your prompt, depending on if I have the energy and/or time for it. If I plan on doing that, I'll let you know in the post and tag you once I have the drawing finished! I may also be swayed into adding a little fic snippet to the answer, if I do feel so inclined. Maybe a song to match the vibes? It'll be a little surprise!

► Rules:

Be nice! It's not hard, and it's basically all I ask.

This is the one time you might not want to shower me in asks because these asks might take a bit to answer. I'm not putting a cap on how many asks per person you're allowed to send, just maybe be mindful of how long they take to answer and space them out over the time of the event.

I'll be accepting asks from the time that this is posted until March 17th. The event ends with the strike of midnight starting the next day. Whenever that may be in your time zone. As long as it's still 23:59 on March 17th somewhere around the world, send in your ask. I might also extend the event if asks keep coming in and I have the energy to keep going.

↬ Additional info for mutuals: You get to ask for crossovers! Just pick one of my OCs and one of yours and I'll try my best to draw them. I might bother you for references though, so be prepared! It doesn't matter how long we've been mutuals for! It could've been five minutes, you're still allowed to send in crossover asks. As long as we're mutuals, let's say, at the time that the ask is answered, it's all good. In practice, that means that you just need to be following me to be able to send in a crossover request. If you ask nicely and maybe say something about why you'd think why our two children would go well together and we share a fandom, it's very unlikely that I'll deny your request and won't follow you back.

Also, if you've ever wanted to say something about my OCs and/or me and my blog, this might be the perfect time for you to do it.

Okay, that's it for now! Love you, everyone! Here's to more fandom-y shenanigans!

Also, behold my new non-OC post divider! It features a lineart sketch of my blog icon in the middle! The icon was designed by @benevolenterrancy pretty much exactly two years ago when they realized my old icon was not, in fact, a unicorn. I still go full-on heart-eyes mode whenever I see my icon, so I figured it was time to remind everyone of the amazing artist that created it <3

Taglist: @starcrossedjedis @oneirataxia-girl @daughter-of-melpomene @fluffle-system @wheresmybloodynauglamir @supermarine-silvally @nanukanal @cody-helix02 (I believe this is the first time I've ever used my full taglist, aka the basic taglist plus everyone from fandom-specific taglists - wowie!) - Let me know if you'd like to be added or removed, for specific fandoms or the general list!

#evie's events #evie's mind palace festival

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ikissjesse · 9 months

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could you do some aaron t/aaron z headcanons pls!

omg yes ofc !! ty for the request <333 since 3 ppl requested aaron² hc's (nothing specific) im gonna put all ur requests into this once post !!

tags: @i-need-a-slurpee @hrts4ariana ( note as of writing: this was a draft from 1719817282 years ago so if u forgot abt this n no longer wanted to be tagged im sorry🥲 )

as i mentioned in this post, they both adore musicals, especially hamilton

aaron² hc's !!

reblogs appreciated + reqs open <3

they like listening to the soundtracks together when they hangout

sometimes when there's a musical near where they are on tour they go together in their free time

u didn't hear it from me but they held hands during one of these musicals bc the room was dark n they thought noone would notice

as bros, ofc.. homies hold hands during musicals !!

they totally sing non-stop from hamilton together its cannon bc i say so

anyway enough abt hamilton for now

there was def mutual pining

they were both like "fuckidishcoaoxjaoa he just thinks of me as a friend"

"friend" NO HE WANTS U SO BAD -God probably idk

the way they attempted to "drop hints":

t tried to make z laugh a lot, even more than he usually did

pranks became less extreme than they normally were, he wanted to surprise him, not scare him to death like he used to

z would, although he denies this, try to do basketball tricks to impress t whenever he is at the basketball court w him

both of them went to jesse for advice, not knowing the other was doing the same

"hey jesse uhm- what should i do if, theoretically, ihavearlybigcrushonsomeonewhoiveknownforawhilebutithinktheyseemeasafriendandireallyreallyREALLYwannabemorebutidontwannaruinourfriendship????" -t

"...what?" -jesse

needless to say jesse was confused as hell

he sent him off w some advice after t slowed down enough for him to understand, then about 15 minutes later z came rambling about the same thing

"JESSE YOU'RE A HIT WITH THE LADIES, AND THE GAYS, AND..BASICALLY ANYONE. HOW DO I FLIRT WITH SOMEONE IVE KNOWN FOR AGES WHO IM PRETTY SURE SEES ME AS JUST A FRIEND?????" -z

thats what made it click for jesse, n he just laughed at the realization

giving him the same advice he gave t, he snickered at the idea of the aarons having a crush on eachother but being too stupid blind to see the feelings were mutual

"thanks jess!!" -z to jesse, running off

"yeah no problem man hehehshshehsh goodluck! HEHEHHEHE"

building up as much courage as he could, z eventually made the first move a few days later

he asked t if he'd like to join him for a musical that would take place at a nearby theater, n he gladly accepted

little did t know where this would lead <33 achoo anyways

as the lights dimmed during a 'romantic' scene, aaron z took t's hand in his own n (quietly) confessed his feelings towards his long-time bestfriend

saying t was happy would be an understatement

the energetic boy yanked him into a hug, leaving his stoic counterpart(ner) highly confused and extremely flustered

choking from t's tight embrace, his face became beet red

"Im, uhm- assuming you feel the same?"

well NO FUCKIN WAY SHERLOCK WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT -God again probably

"yeah dumbass, ofcourse i do!" t whisper-yelled, trying to keep his excitement down as they were still in a theater after all !!!

after that, z just smiled n wrapped his arms around t's waist, returning the hug

but wait !! theres more !!

what kind of ikissjesse ship post would this be without cute couple hc's ???

the quiet stoic boy x loud energetic boy dynamic UUGF MY HEART I THINK IM DYIBG from how much i love this duo😔😔

z buys t a baseball cap in EVERY city/country they go to. every fucking one

even if its not a band tour, if z is out somewhere n sees a cool cap he thinks t would like, yall better believe this boy would cut off an arm n sell a kidney just for t to get that hat

t has a whole side in his closet dedicated to these hats z buys him, he finds it absolutely adorable

z actually thinks he isnt good at gift giving, so he was afraid t wouldnt like it at first, but t's reaction is enough conformation that he adores it

now what kinda aaron² hamilton lover truther would i be if i didnt mention the musical again 💪💪

they have FREQUENT hamilton marathons together, sometimes the other members of 4*town will join in too !!

they still sortve act like they did before, like friends n what not

however theyre also 300% more flirty

by that i mean T is 300% more flirty

z might be a LITTLE bit but def not as much as my boy aaron t (the r in aaron stands for rizzler -aaron t)

z isn't a big fan of PDA himself, however when t does little displays of affection when theyre in public he loves it ( he doesn't say it out loud bc he's shy but he does smile at t or to himself, holding t's hand or draping an arm over his shoulders )

when theyre in private z will hug t from behind, hold his waist, kiss his forehead, etc .... yk... bro stuff......

t surprises him by going BOO!!! and jumping up to put his arms around his shoulders from behind, which at first scared z shitless n earned t a lecture about why he shouldn't scare him like that bc z WILL swing but z is okay with it now n actually smiles ALBEIT A VERY SMALL SMILE when he does it

dates include but r not limited to playing basketball late at night together, movies, watching musicals, roadtrips to literally anywhere long or short they just wanna be in eachothers presence OUGHG I LOVE THEM

i forgot to mention !!! t is definitely the one who asked to be boyfriends, but z accidentally said "I love you" first

t was doing something dumb again, and z shook his head as he laughed, accidentally mumbling the words "I love you" out loud

t stopped dead in his tracks n snapped his head in z's direction, n yall this boy was STRESSED he did NOT mean to let the world know this information

z covered his face with his hands n his face was PINK pink bro but t just laughed n walked over to him, cupping his face in his hands and staring at him with a very VERY smug but genuine n happy grin

z scoffed, but soon glanced back at the other boy and smiled shyly

theyre so cute im throwing up in class

there's more but i think this is long enough for now, sorry for the wait pls snack on this while u wait for the rest of my jesro + aaron² content i have planned WINK WINK

thank u for reading <3

#4town #turning red #4townie #4town aaron z #4town aaron t #aaron² #aaron t x aaron z #turning red headcanons #4town headcanons

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simlicious · 1 year

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I am not posting much atm, here is why

heya, I'm pretty quiet on the posting front at the moment. This has several reasons. Since this might come across as a bit whiny, feel free to skip this personal ramble.

The good stuff first: I made a pact with my best friend and now we take a long walk together every week to increase our fitness levels. It encourages me to leave the house and get some fresh air and be in nature and it feels very good! We actually did a lot more together in the last months than just the walk, so I am quite busy and also often exhausted from the activity. I have also gotten back into Anno 1800 now that the game has reached its final state, and I am fixing some old mods that are not available anymore but I cannot live without, and I am also working on some of my own mods. The reason why I am taking a break from making patterns has mainly to do with the negative feelings I developed in the last months. I have been putting off writing this post for weeks, but my feelings have not gone away and I want to address this particular issue. Tbh, I often get aggravated when viewing my dash these days. I'm not the most emotionally stable person and my self-worth comes also from external sources, like feedback for my patterns, which is not ideal, but it is what it is right now. Lately, I feel that as a creator of recolorable patterns, I am being pushed deep into a corner. I've always considered myself a niche creator, catering to patterns kinda does that! But I feel like I am becoming obsolete, now that a lot of creators only make Sims 4 conversions and are usually not fully recolorable. I also fear that more and more creators will forget/will never learn how to make clothes and objects recolorable if all they do is add non-recolorable Sims 4 presets. I consider the Create-A-Style tool to be the most important feature of TS3 (together with open worlds). It is such a unique feature, and it breaks my heart to see that not being valued as such. I feel like we should celebrate that, and I try to with my patterns, but it's just so hard to keep it up when most creators do not seem to particularly care anymore. I wish more creators would make the good old Frankenmeshes 😥 I would love to see more ts3 and ts4 frankenmesh mashups. Creators would need to learn how to turn Sims 4 textures into greyscale ones and step up their uv-mapping game a bit, and then it could be a thing... There could even be an open library of recolorable sims 4 textures and remapped meshes that all creators could contribute to. That way, creators could use them and would not need to remake every texture from scratch by themselves. Over time, that would greatly decrease the effort that would need to be put in to make new creations this way... I know that most of you follow me because you really value my patterns and use them in your games, and I know that people who play mainly with vanilla content won't have that problem at all, as 99% the EA stuff can be recolored. But it's just that I see those non-recolorable conversions everywhere on my dash, and it is so disheartening. I guess as a creator, I want to feel welcome in the TS3 creator community, and lately, I do not feel particularly seen or valued as a member of that group. Maybe my Tumblr bubble has shoved me somewhat outside of the group that I would feel more valued in? Maybe I need to adjust my dash. But I do not want to unfollow everyone who posts these conversions. They are nice in their own right, it's just that I can't handle them very well right now. How do you deal with stuff that you do not want to see? do you unfollow people, do you block tags? I've been mostly avoiding my dash, but that does not seem like a good solution. If you post gameplay pics with my patterns or are a creator that makes their stuff CAS-Tool compatible, feel free to tell me below so I can follow you. Just seeing more people use my patterns would probably lift my spirits!

#personal #but still sims-related

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littlebitshylittlebitangry · 3 months

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Here I just copied and pasted it, enjoy

First of thanks for tagging me in that little fic between arcane egg and shadow milk, it made me so happy but also so very sad. For as much as I put my little cookie through I just want her to be happy. The more I look at the “it takes two au”, the more I realize that this arcane egg has the worst time. Like ever.

Warnings for: suicide ideation, suicidal thoughts, and attempted suicide, feel free to skip this post.

Which leads to this scenario, it takes place at arcane egg’s lowest point. I imagine that the force kept in her soul jam has been released, probably by dark enchantress, she probably exploited arcane eggs rapidly growing hopelessness to break it. And so releases the nightmares / hungry one’s that then take arcane egg as some sort of host / center point, since I don’t know if you noticed but their just full of suffering.

Anyways plot ensues and I imagine golden butter is able to enter what ever plane / abyss arcane is with the help of the other beasts ,since their obviously they care about arcane egg especially shadow milk cookie. So golden butter finds her and is like

“Cmon we gotta get you out of here“

And arcane egg is like “no”

“??? What do you mean no”

“I mean no, I’m not leaving. But I know that the hungry ones are a problem so you should just kill it.”

And golden butter is like, wouldn’t that kill you? And arcane egg replies yup that’s the plan… THE PLAN?!?

Golden butter is obviously not gonna do because why would she. And if arcane egg doesn’t only have major self hate issues, unresolved feelings for shadow milk cookie, but also unresolved feelings for golden butter than omg. Arcane egg wants to die, full stop at this point.

And so arcane egg just starts pleading, begging for her death to golden butter. Much to her horror I imagine. Like full on mental breakdown, it starts to show not only her depression but her slight insanity is the best way I can describe it. Arcane egg is in full hysterics just begging

“Please please, I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t want to be awake. It’s to much!”

And will arcane egg ever explain why, no of course not. And that’s for two reasons, first as stated previously she’s the very definition of the meme “I’ll keep all my feelings here, and than one day I’ll die”, and secondly if they tells them her feelings they’ll surely hate her. And that’s so much worse than death, especially for someone who’s as soul crushingly devoted as arcane egg is to those they care about.

So at one point arcane egg just tries to get golden weapon so she can just do it herself, obviously golden resists and like it’s not a good time all around.

How would golden butter react, how would the others react, shadow milk? I don’t know honestly because this scenario is just so so depressing it’s actually ridiculous .

Anyways thanks for listening to this very disorganized rambling. Hope I don’t make you go sad, see ya!

ooooo

You have given me ideas, friend.

Warnings; Suicide idelation, thoughts of suicide and Attempted assited suicide, getting knocked out by magic.

Be warned

She knew the moment they step foot into her resisidence. She felt the moment they were searching for her. She hated it- Hated this.

The buzzing between her jam- her formeraly cripsy layer had cracks in it. It looked and honestly felt quite painful as she traced them over, she could tell just by looking down to her neck that it was likely she already had cracks on her face.

(She was on a timer- It wasn't something that someone had to tell you. Sometimes you just know. You know you're dying and that you can't be saved.)

(Arcane Egg was on a timer- perhaps she had always been on a timer.)

Gazing at their soul Jam they saw the former once bright color shift darker. The outer layers almost pure black as what looked like cracks slowly crept towards the center. Its then they bend their head to spot the neckless laying on them.

They reach their hand up to cup the neckless for a moment- and they stare as liquid drips from their face. She release the neckless was they reach their hand up to rub their eyes.

She doesn't even recognize her voice for a moment as she whispers, "Its better this way." It throws her off as she looks around, before she settles, realizing its her voice. Its raspy, horse and sounds dead.

Its a bitter thing, perhaps just like they feel.

They close their eyes with a shudder as they almost feel the group split up- one of them seemingly coming her direction. For a moment it comes to her.

(She's too cowardly to do it herself, to scared, too terrifyed of the consequences for herself, but what if?)

(Surely one of the others would be willing?)

(Surely they would do it- They understood the consequences if it doesn't- Even if the rest didn't- Then surely wouldn't Golden Butter be willing?)

So they stay. They stay in that spot as they sit there and they feel the moment someone steps within their range.

They know who it is the moment they speak.

"..Arcane Egg Cookie... why- are you okay?!" She feels Golden Butter rush over and turn her to face them. She sees the frantic look on the others face as she carefully looks over the newly formed cracks.

Golden butter slowly traces over what they can only assume to be a crack on their face. Slowly she speaks, "We gotta get you out of here." She tries to pull Arcane up, but stalls when the other just sits there. "...Arcane Egg?..."

She shakes her head, "No." She replies.

Golden Butter freezes, "..Arcane.. what do you mean by no?" Arcane shakes her head as Golden Butter grabs her shoulders, "Arcane what do you mean by no?"

Arcane egg shakes off Golden Butters hands, "I'm not leaving. The hungry ones are a problem that need to be gotten rid of, but I need help to do it." She looks Golden Butter right in the eye as a slow on coming horror falls into them.

Golden butter is shaking, and shes shaking badly.

"w-wouldn't that kill you?" She stutters over herself, "Wouldn't that demand your death at this point- Arcane there are other ways we can look into-" Arcane Egg raises a hand, "This is the plan. It has always been the plan." Her voice is resigned, as she drops her hand.

Golden Butter went still as Arcane Egg continued, "...I'm sorry... Golden Butter, I need you to kill me, I need this all to stop." Golden egg shakes her head as she reaches out a hand and grabs on Arcanes wirst, "I- Acrane- I- I can't, I refuse." She shakes her head frantically.

Arcane Egg stares at her as Golden Butter shakes and grips onto them. Arcane Egg looks down, "You have to Goldie.. There... There isn't another option, This is the only choice-"

"NO!" Golden Butter shouts.

Arcane Egg stares at golden Butter, looking slightly frazzles as a wild look begins to form in their eyes. "You have to goldie- no else will understand- you- you have to- there isn't another option you have to-" Golden Butter shakes her head, "I- I can't, I refuse."

Arcane eaches out and grabs onto Golden Butter who pauses in their shaking, "You- You have to Goldie- Please- please you have to- I can't- I can't take any of this anymore- PLeas being awake- living like this- I can't- I can't take it-" They feel something press onto the side of their neck.

They look at Golden butter desperatly, "please please, I don't want to be here anymore- I don't- I can't- please- I can't stand being awake- its ts too much-" Slowly their breathing slowers as they slur over their words as Golden butters magic takes hold.

The other kneels down, tears falling down her face, "I'm- I'm so sorry Arcane- I- I promise, I'll make it better, we'll make you better." A kiss presses to their forehead as they feel themselve slip away, "You- You deserve so much- far more then what the world has handed to you."

They slip into the unconiousness with a wheeping friend holding onto them with a wild desperation.

And slowly another cookie comes around the cornor. He swallows, "I'll carry her." Golden Butter swirls over to him, "Shado-" He shakes his head, "..Not... Not now....just.... lets just focus on Arcane."

Its moments as golden butter slowly releases her hold on Arcane that Shadow Milk cookie picks her up and the pair begin walking back.

ooh boy this one was a large one, Hope you like it!

Also note for you or anyone else who has ideas regarding cookie run kingdom. Check out my sideblog @revisitingfandoms. I do writing requests there.

#cookie run kingdom #cookie run #cookie run au #cookie run oc #two in fact #check out my last post to check out the amazing writiers for these two #I'll link it later #shadow milk cookie

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simspaghetti · 8 months

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🎶✨ When you get this, you have to write down 5 songs you actually listen to and post them. Then send this (ask or tag) to 10 cool people✨🎶

thank you for the tag @faelegacy 💕💕

i don’t normally do tag games (because i never know what to say or i notice them weeks too late in my inbox, sorry!! 😭😭) but i love sharing music so thanks for letting me ramble hehe

1. Mr Magic - Amy Winehouse

an amy winehouse song of course has to make an appearance on this list so why not put it at the top, i’ve had Mr Magic on repeat recently because the saxophone solos just makes my brain go brrrrr, they’re perfect - amy is probably my favourite artist of all time she was an abseloute legend </3

2. Pulaski at Night - Andrew Bird

i don’t know why i associate this song with summer / travelling? but i do! i went on a couple of flights last week and this is the song i always play when the plane takes off haha, it's a good one you should give it a listen!

3. Ghost Town - The Specials

getting ready for halloween / autumn coming soon and this definitely gives spooky vibes - i’ve had it on repeat all year though tbh, that synth just tickles me pickle

4. Time - Pink Floyd

this one is a bit melancholy and hits a liiiiittle too close to home with me going into my final year of uni soon, but i’ve had it on repeat recently anyway lol - i just love pink floyd, it was a toss up between this one and ‘shine on you crazy diamond’ to put on this list, generally i’m just such a sucker for a good guitar solo and i always have been 🫶

5. Cry Me A River - Julie London

cry me a river was heavily on my playlists this time last year but i’ve been starting to get obsessed with it again hehe - something about this song just wrenches at my gut it’s so good!

📧 i’m gonna tag: @sushiikinsss @llamabees @magiclabs @thepettymachine @nectar-cellar @ares-in-a-jar @frostedshore @kellysardinovich @neillesimstories @autonomousllama

of course, feel free to ignore this if you've already been tagged or don't want to do it! 💛

#replies #non sims #about me

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bebethsas · 8 months

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*giglgles* here’s a rant I’ve had sitting in my drafts for a bit now. I think now is the perfect time to post it. Enjoy Beth’s impassioned ramblings from ~1 month ago (and sorry in advance, I know that this is LONG):

“Chrissy…this is for you.”

Holyjesusmotherof—

I am on the floor. I am dead. I am lying on my stomach, staring off into the middle distance with a look that can only be described as stunned disbelief, or just straight-up stunned. They would have been a f*cking powderkeg, wouldn’t they?

Dear mother of god, the way he says that, so softly, so reverently, I…

If they’d been given just a smidge more time, they (yes, they) would have loved each other so *fiercely*.

They would have been goddamn explosive. They would have (accidentally) rocked the school to its foundations and razed the HS to the ground (more like, they exist, and the high school tears itself apart because of their relationship’s existence). There is no doubt in my mind that if there was a sliver of a chance for one of them to bring the other back from the dead, they’d do it.

Like, the kind of love where you claw through brick and cinderblock with your bare hands to reach them, and you don’t notice until long afterwards that you’ve torn like…six of your nails, and your hands are bleeding. And sure, you have to keep your hands wrapped in bandages for the next couple of weeks while they heal, but who cares??? What does it matter?? They’re alive, you found them, they’re here. Like the minute one of them is in danger, the other person doesn’t hesitate, they just leap.

Like, yo Bangles, you wanna talk Eternal Flame? That’s an eternal flame. Like, a flame that keeps burning over centuries kind of “Eternal” flame; like the Olympic fire that they’re supposed to keep burning forever and ever (it doesn’t, but shhhhh), like a candle in a sea of darkness that against all odds never, ever goes out. That’s the kind of love I mean here.

Like, saying ‘I’ll find you in the next life,’ and then they do, kind of eternal flame.

Like, “death cannot stop true love, it can only delay it a little while,” kind of un-douseable flame. Not an uncontrollable wildfire, or even a small campfire. Just, this strong yet persevering little candle that provides comfort, joy, and light. Doesn’t hurt nobody, isn’t insatiably hungry or all-consuming, it just…is.

They are an example of true love, and no one can convince me otherwise. And I mean actual true love, like 2 puzzle pieces that naturally click together. It’s like they were made for each other, but it was an *accident*.

It’s not like a deity took a soul, split it in half, and then zotted these 2 halves down onto earth and went ‘here, now go find each other.’ It’s more like they created one soul, and then created another soul, and by sheer coincidence or serendipity or chance or whatever, these two line up perfectly, with no imperfections or jagged bits in the way.

They are Agatha and Oliver (I will elaborate on another post, christ this post got fuckin long).

Jesus christ how can I be so damn shook over one line, that it’s making me spiral and pull out analogies and references that are *deeply* buried in my brain??

I’m gonna end up writing a gottdamn thesis on (the way I view) their relationship, aren’t I?

…yes. Yes, I probably am.

Anyway, that’s the tale of when I first saw the scene, and had to have a bit of a lie-down for a while, because thoughts were spiraling.

...ok, I wrote tags for this, then realized that I should probably put them in the body of the post too. So:

#no joke those 2 seconds of “Chrissy...this is for you” used to make me literally so weak, that I had to dramatically lean on furniture to stay upright. #the emotion #the goddamn EMOTION

#and Chrissy is such a sweetheart, #and Eddie was so kind and gentle with her...

#you know, you just KNOW, that she would have loved him with the fierceness of a lioness

#because when you’re sad, and scared, and lonely, and feel like none of your supposed ‘loved ones’ can or will listen--or even care (let alone ask) about how you’re doing

#and you are doing EVERYTHING you can just to continue on, #with seemingly ZERO support #to have someone come along and *help* you, #no questions asked, #no returned favors needed or asked for

#to have someone instantly *know* that you’re going through it, #respect your need for privacy, #and treat you so gently and reverently, #like you’re worthy of being loved???

(and again, not comment on the fact that you’re *clearly* going through it, because they respect that it’s probably not any of their business, and you probably don’t *want* to talk about it, and even though you *should* talk about it, they’re not going to push you)

#yeah. #even if they weren’t interested in you romantically, it’s too late #they have your heart now and forever

#genuinely kind people are not easy to find #don’t get me wrong they *exist*, #they’re not *rare*, #they’re just hella hard to FIND

#so once you DO find one?? #yeah you’re glomming onto that person like a barnacle and refusing to let go

#hellcheer #hellcheer rant/ ramble #HELLCHEER IS TRUE LOVE OK???#also you get a cookie if you read the entire thing! X3

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