#so it's a fuckton of personal shit that trust me

[weregreatatcrime]

Hiii! Omg I am so happy to see you doing Trollhunters again! And I am enjoying the crossover tidbits.

Though, as an older fan, I am curious to ask, hope it doesn't feel too pushy. Have you thought about your Kanjibarbara fic ever since coming back to ToA?

Okay so I'm gonna say it again and probably not one more time. Not because this ask was pushy, you're fine, but because I've gotten Several asks about it over the last two years since stopping Kanjibara au and all my other projects. It's frustrating because it's a deeply personal and painful topic for me and many people from multiple Fandoms keep asking the same questions. Like a lot of people. Like, a LOT of fucking people on ao3

The last two years have been medical hell. I've had a fuckton of medical, neurological, and mental issues that changed my entire life- part of those issues are cognitive decline and memory loss. The first year is a blur tbh, and a lot of my memories are fuzzy as a result. My ability to recall things is scattered- some shit is fine, some stuff may as well have happened to a stranger.

Part of that is my creative work. I don't think I'll ever continue the things I was working on beforehand, simply because I don't remember what I was planning or what I was doing with them. I remember I had an absolute joy with them! I remember the Trollhunters Fandom being a delight and a very warm and welcoming environment.

But a lot of details are muddy and I'm sure you understand, trying to piece together my own memories of stuff I'm struggling with is frustrating and painful and more stressful than it's worth. I'm already recovering incredibly well right now, I don't feel like digging myself back into that hole for Fandom stuff

New stuff is all on the table though! After two years, I finally was able to get my hand strength back up enough to draw recently and have been working on maintaining it. (Tremors and spasms made it impossible before) I'm also back into writing- though I still struggle with cognitive issues with writing, working on writing things that bring me joy has helped a lot

But all my projects from before are likely not going to be touched on again. It sucks. But they're a sensitive topic for me rn and probably will be touchy for a long while. Chances are I'll delete any asks or comments I get about them from here on out just for my own sake

#thanks for being polite #I'm just very tired of people asking this stuff #i know i haven't really talked about it but that's because its shitty stuff to deal with #and i dont want to talk about it #because thats a giant rabbit hole of issues i can't get into without putting myself in a bad mood #I'm still working on my hand strength #and i still can't walk without crutches or for very long #so it's a fuckton of personal shit that trust me #you don't want me to get into #my stuff #ask #anonymous #Kanjibara au #tagging so folks can see it #tw memory loss #tw mental health #tw medical #idk what to tag this with so #ask to tag

[traumacodedtransbitch]

also just to say that d*pp is clearly encouraging this shitty and vile behaviour. but his behaviour is not being scrutinised as being "traumatised" enough. he's just re-traumatising heard as some sort of sick backlash or revenge

people are getting off on this shit. HE'S GETTING OFF ON IT. that should be a very fucking clear indication. he WANTS this all to happen

I hope he fucking rots

#trauma #vent #personal #i am so scared of people just exposing how vile they can be #i do not trust like a whole goddamn fuckton of people now #i don't know who around me is encouraging this shit #and that fucking scares and upsets me like hell #even with all this fucking evidence people are just enjoying the fuck out of this #rant #i am so disgusted at so many goddamn fucking people right now #abuse tw #ok to reblog

[olderthannetfic]

Are age gaps always a bad thing? Is it possible to be at a different 'level' from someone else your own literal age?

I'm 21 but I really don't feel it. Many of my friends are very mature and know what they're doing with their lives but I don't. I feel several years behind everyone else and, in terms of experience, I am. I got out of a cult that forbade a lot of normal teen stuff and tried to have more experiences, then covid hit and my pre-existing health condition-having self avoided people like the plague. I worry that by the time I feel ready for a relationship, everyone my age will be too far ahead of me.

One of my friends is 19. They dated a 17 year old. This is the kinda relationship antis start shit over when it's fictional. I think it's probably fine - I can believe that a 17yo is a bit more mature and a 19yo is a bit more immature. But some of my friends seem bothered by it so I'm not sure what I should think.

What is normal and okay?

--

Many people feel out of step with their supposed peers. Age gaps aren't inherently bad, but I don't necessarily think they're the answer to feeling out of step.

What is normal and okay are relationships that are healthy for the people involved. These are relationships that respect boundaries and provide support and positive feelings for both/all parties. That's how you judge health, not absolute metrics like age.

I'm sorry I can't give you a clear-cut rule. I know how difficult it is to just "trust your gut" if your instincts were honed in a cult. Your internal compass is all wonky. (You'd be surprised how many people I know who were raised in cults.)

17 and 19 is commonplace. It's only in the rarefied atmosphere of tumblr and such that people think it's a problem. I have no idea if your friends' relationship is healthy or not without knowing them.

For you at 21, I get feeling behind, but I wouldn't go for someone significantly younger, personally. If you're in college, dating another college student makes sense, but I wouldn't date anyone not yet in college.

Instead, I would look for other people who also feel out of step. Hell, I might look for someone older who's gone through what you're going through. It's not only cults that do it: an illness or a tragedy in the family can put people "behind" in similar ways. Neurotic perfectionist types also just tend to feel behind because they think they should have it all figured out by now.

But nobody actually has it figured out. Sorry.

It's fine to go sow some wild oats and recreate some of the teen experiences that you missed, but don't imagine that even people with "regular" adolescences all had the Hollywood version of everything. Sometimes, you imagine you're missing out on a lot more than you actually are. It's not about the experiences: it's about your feelings of incompleteness. Sometimes, you fix it by going out and getting those experiences. Sometimes, you fix it by working on the feeling themselves.

I do think there can be ages where it feels like everyone else is getting married and doesn't want to go out partying or like everyone settled down before you and nobody worth having is left when you want to settle down yourself, but that shit tends to be in your late 30s, and it's still a mistake to take a general tendency as a rule for your own life. Plenty of individual people settle down or still want to party at any age.

21 is a tough age because every year or two feels like a huge gap. But even by 25 and certainly by 30, it stops being like that. There just isn't that much difference between a bunch of adult coworkers. I know plenty of people who got together with somebody 20 years older but who was a hobby or work peer. And sure, occasionally, it's some old person creeping on nubile young things because they're a jackass, but just as often, it's reasonable adults connecting because they have things in common.

Most people's 40s are a fuckton better than their 20s, no matter what media tells you. Tumblr is full of people wondering when the lies on TV will come true in their 20-something lives. The pandemic derailed so many people's plans too. You're much less alone than it feels.

It's normal to feel at sea in a world that's on fire. Give it a couple of years, dude. Nobody has it figured out anyway, but especially nobody has it figured out in 2022.

[visage-of-hell]

Munday About Me

Name: Yeen

Age: 38

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Bi

Single Or Taken: Married as FUCK!

Hobbies: Art, writing, gaming/streaming, painting/customizing figures and tabletop minis, lots of other nerdy craft shit you should totally ask me about if you never want me to shut up. LOL

Favorite Color: Electric Blue

Fandoms: Hazbin/Hellaverse (obviously) but SOOOOOO many others I would be here all day. The main ones right now (and most frequent ones to flare up again) are Warcraft, Overwatch, Baldur's Gate 3, Vampire the Masquerade, Warhammer, DETROIT: Become Human, Mass Effect/Dragon Age, The Walking Dead, The Quarry

Other Blogs: The full list of these would have us here til tomorrow--trust me, you're better off not knowing. XD The only time I ever really use Tumblr is for RP, I haven't had an OOC/personal account in YEARS!

Favorite TV Show: As far as actual Ye Olde "TV Shows" back when I used to actually sit in front of a television for entertainment, my go-to's were Law & Order SVU, CSI: Miami, Forensic Files, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, and a literal FUCKTON of different Saturday morning cartoons. Other series, if they count, would be Hazbin and Helluva Boss (duh), Beastars, Attack on Titan, Nightwatch, and probably a bunch of others I'm not remembering at the moment. LOL

Do You Cosplay: Back when I used to dabble in LARPing, I did lots of costume work, so I GUESS you could count that as cosplay? Also have fursuited a few times back when I was still active in the fandom. I'd like to tell myself that someday I'll get back into making cool character costumes when I have the perfect combination of time/money/space ... buuuut we'll see. X3

Favorite Media: Oooo this is hard to pick, I'm into so many. XD UHHHH ... Warcraft!

Favorite Book: The entire Redwall novel series (though I definitely have my individual favs)

Favorite Band: Am I dating myself if I say "Evanescence"?

Favorite Movie: WAY too many to just pick one, so here are my top 5 that I has watched over and over for a loooooong time: Lost World: Jurassic Park, Lion King, The Matrix, Beetlejuice, Dragonheart

Do You Have Pets: That are mine? Two--my dog-daughter Blondie and my cat-daughter Velcro. Extended animal family that belong to my folks? 11 kitties (they all live either in specially-designed indoor rooms just for them or in custom-built kitty condos that are outside in the back yard but are safely enclosed) and 4 doggos (all indoor, though they also go out in the yard a lot).

Favorite Animal: As an extreme animal nerd, I have a TON of favs but the Number One Winner right now are hyenas! Mostly spotted hyenas, but I loved striped and brown yeens, too!

Do You Play Any Instruments: Do my vocal cords count? LOL

Favorite Hellaverse Character(s): Hazbins Favs: Alastor, Angel, Husk. Helluva Boss Favs: Blitz, Loona, Ozzie

Tagged By: @radioiaci (Thank youuuuuu ilu <333)

Tagging: @sanguineradio, @angie-long-legs, @top-shelf-tender & aaaanyone else! <3

#DashGames: HappyHourAtTheClub #MunInfo: BehindThoseSilverEyes

[yther]

Two (or was it 3?) years ago I spent "christmas" and the next week in the same pair of clothes on a bed with no sheet or blanket and I used a trash bag when I was too cold. I weighed 20lbs less but I had muscle still. I wish I knew then what I knew now. I would go back to absolute hopelessness and scarcity if I could save myself from the people I'd meet or the person I was with.

But mostly, I regret that I gave up, I thought I had nothing more to lose when in reality I had my whole life, still. I had my life. I had a FUCKTON more health, even though I clearly took it for granted. And as much as I feel like I did back then, that I have nothing at all to lose, I have learned It can always get worse! AlWAYS!

Suicide is not reliable, brain damage sucks. So... Shit really really sucks this year and I promised myself that I wouldn't endure another, but I should break that promise..? I should find a way to survive. But I am so tired and hurt and angry. So confused.

I miss humanity. I miss... so much and I'll never understand what has been done to me or taken from me (at least to the full extent). I need to find my way back to some community, somewhere somehow. I need to fight this vicious isolation and recover from the harassment and violation. I need to "fight" - I'm not sure what that means anymore. I need to survive, and that itself is a fight I'm losing.

I don't see any path forward, but I know there is one..? I also know I have been terrorized and traumatized for so long I can barely speak coherently irl. I didn't sleep or eat and terror as an energy source has a hell of a price. I don't trust myself to think. Really think and make important decisions. I desperately need that ability but I'm only getting more exhausted and malnourished and broken and afraid..

Survival is resistance but <forever blinking cursor>

#what am I gonna tag this? surviving assault surviving what becomes domestic abuse situation surviving ongoing suicide bait shit surviving? #being targeted and hacked and exposed and put on trial in a kangaroo court of bullshit backstabbers and liars? #how to survive not being able to speak or express anything g e n d e r related online or irl for fear of being Literally Shot to Death by #town that literally wants me dead because of what some people did online and shared #how to survive every pain being used against you #how to survive identity theft and online impersonation and a crusade by my ex or someone pretending to be my ex #LOL #but I refuse to die #out of fucking spite it's what I have right now. anger. but I can't move on with this anger. I need help I need support from SOMEONE. #I have absolutely no one I feel safe to talk to #0 #everyone needs somebody sometimes I've quit praying but please god or the universe or what the fuck ever. please Somebody human. if anyone #really exists to me anymore - or... Well. I don't exist to anyone I don't think. #anyone who has wished harm upon me or told me to kms should KILL THEMSELVES mmk. glad we're clear on that

[know-the-way]

On the one hand, getting an autism diagnosis last year, in combination with ADHD, helped me to understand a lot about how my mind and nervous system work and brought me closer to my (also autistic) little brother (and I’m grateful for that).

On the other hand, it’s created a kind of hellscape of self-doubt within me that I thought I’d broken free from a long time ago. At some point in my early 20s, I well and truly stopped giving a fuck what anyone else thought of me. I had worked through a fuckton of trauma, left an abusive situation, and was too exhausted to let anyone else affect how I saw myself. I decided to trust myself. And I’ve stayed trusting myself since, being fairly confident that I lead and communicate with empathy and compassion (and when I don’t, I make an effort to genuinely apologize).

Now, though? I don’t know. There’s a part of me that says “keep trusting yourself, you were doing just fine,” but there’s another part of me that’s been inundated with studies and articles and expert testimonies that all keep saying that people on the spectrum lack empathy. Furthermore, that at times we “won’t even realize” when we’ve offended a neurotypical person. And that’s really been fucking with my head.

The logical part of my brain is like “what a load of bullshit, you know that’s not right, you know the studies are often based on outdated, eugenicist, and disproven information.” But the paranoid little shit side of my brain is like “what if you’ve absolutely bulldozed someone’s feelings without realizing it and your words have stuck with them their whole life since? what if you are part of their most painful memory ‘cause you said or did something insensitive? 🙃”

So now, I’m almost terrified to speak to people (not that it was ever easy for me, but at least I wasn’t scared I’d hurt anyone’s feelings). Unless we’ve known each other a while, but sometimes even then… EVEN THEN. It’s so fucking annoying. Has anyone else experienced this specific emotional spiral? I just haven’t felt this insecure (and, by extension, unsafe) in years and I don’t know how to shake it. Me a year ago would be disgusted that I was doubting myself, but I’m over here like “girl, you’re the one who left, return from war already, I miss you too.”

I know therapy is the ultimate solution to this and I am in therapy, but if anyone can just tell me I’m not alone in this feeling (and, hopefully, that you overcame it), that would be just super cool right now.

#autistic adult #autistic problems #actually autistic #audhd #actually audhd

[nugsanart09-works]

speedrunning my teapot

okay so as my roster's nova, they know damn well on how i go from "gone for literal years" to "bulldozing through every quest available within a day" — the latter being specifically when i spedrun through the liyue quest (that i've been neglecting for years now whoops) for the taste testing teapot event. yep, i have shit priorities and it shows lmao

little note that i believe the aurora bot allows the sunshines what the nova's current status is at the bare minimum unless asked for further information

if your system aurora is a menace, it would report what your current motivation is if its nova don't talk while playing — for extra ammo, it might even go full throttle by telling the sunshines even the most minute detail it can tell them i.e. if you're too busy staring at zhongli's ass and the like

moving on, so after twelve (12) hours of grinding i finally have my teapot at trust rank 4 and im just gonna bullet point it with a bit of chatbox-esque dialogue thingie:

everyone in my main party (lumine, barbara, xiangling and shinobu) are main victims of the entire ride. the secondary team – dubbed as stamina squad – suffered the second half of the day the moment i got the teapot (razor, rosaria, amber and jean)

《— •▪︎{★}▪︎• —》

first half: the archon quest

AURORA [bot]: 【 NOVA [insert username] IS DISTRACTED. PAIMON AND TRAVELER, PLEASE STANDBY AND PAY ATTENTION. 】 Team: *groan* Paimon: not again!

i will admit it now: i was not paying attention the whole time

except for the perfume part. i was relentlessly choosing the fruitiest options possible and having paimon (and likely the other party members) suffer my bs

timeus you lucky bastard– (if you played the recent windblume event then you know why i'm cursing this man rn)

xiangling be going "really? right in front of my stove/dad" the entire time i was with ying'er lol

sorry gurl but ying'er's everything is too hilarious to pass up

TARTAGLIA: nothing personal~ Shinobu, having just released her skill: wait, FUCK—! 【 SHINOBU (LV.20) HAS BEEN SLAIN 】 Shinobu, in the chat: every. damned. TIME. Lisa and Yanfei: *comforting her because they've been through the same thing*

shinobu dies a fuckton and @yeelimso had once stated that the resident inazuman def would not like me for the bs i put her through

take note that she's stuck at the level 20 the entire time that i've been using her

yeah she def hates me lol

no boss battle ends without shinobu at least dying once

barbara desperately keeping the team alive while she herself is on life support

the team suffering my shit coordination with my keys (setting off their bursts at wrong time or the wrong person gets their burst activated) as i lowkey panic whenever i see the ballista's hp going lower than 20%

barely got through that boss battle ngl

fucking fatui

still felt bad for childe tho but eh stinky red poo poo man + such is politics lol rip bozo

《— •▪︎{★}▪︎• —》

interlude: getting the teapot

aka round two of my team suffering my gay ass feat. yanfei

yanfei is so good in this quest like man her big brain holy shit 😳

sunshine yanfei dying inside as her nova gay panics over her earthshine self

there are literally three moods in this quest: (1) yanfei admiration, (2) head empty hours with paimon, and (3) appreciating madame ping's eyebags for some reason

god, im so sorry yanfei 🙇💦

《— •▪︎{★}▪︎• —》

second half: speedrunning the teapot

if you've seen some of my genshin reblogs the past few days then you know that this was a long time coming

deadass prioritized aloy > everybody else

which def would've made her uncomfy if she is self-aware whoops

oh well, at least she has her little outdoor retreat all the way over the corner of my teapot

left my mansion empty until trust rank 2, which caused me to go on a shopping spree

i felt bad when kaeya's lines hit me with "well decorated" and "homey" but there's only a dining set there

now my lobby is filled with bookshelves for days

along with other knicknacks

meanwhile... razor and jean: *material collecting noises in the distance intensifies*

noelle and rosaria are now with him too! because if i do get isekai'd in the "sagau" these people are my to-go to and i need their friendship rank high stat

i fed them so much food you have no idea—

paimon has a room of her own and that is the only other room that is furnished (for now)

she deserves that much after all the bullying i inflicted on her lmao

hmmm... seeing that i never use my sticky honey roast batches so i might as well feed paimon those later

the event is going to end soon so yee imma try to wrap this up to further speedrun

that's it for now. i haven't slept since yesterday and it's, haha, past noon here... yeah, imma continue the gaming later...

i hope you enjoyed!

again, if you want to use my version of sagau, please tag me. other than that, feel free to use it as your base!

#nugsanfiction #nugsandrabbles #nugsanbabbles #novaverse #genshin impact #genshin sagau #team dynamics #genshin traveler #genshin lumine #genshin paimon #genshin au #self-aware au #self aware au #platonic #genshin barbara #genshin shinobu #shinobu kuki #barbara pegg #genshin xiangling #genshin ying'er #does this count as yanfei x reader or??? #genshin yanfei #aloy horizon #genshin kaeya #kaeya alberich #geshin noelle #genshin rosaria #genshin jean #jean gunnhildr #genshin razor

[squirrelno2]

Jesse Lives AU, pt 4

What is a schedule? Are these even remotely similar in length? Am I ever posting this anywhere other than Tumblr? These are the questions that have no answer.

Under the cut: Jesse and Jale go exploring and finally get off-world. (Apparently tumblr hates me so never mind on that last part I guess I'm writing part five based off my memory of the fuckton of content I wrote that Tumblr just lost. Have fun with what I've got though)

Previous: 1, 2, 3

Next: 5

Jale went around the side of the crash, knowing better than to try and enter a ship at the engine end when it had only recently wrecked. He and a still-complaining Jesse found their way in at the hangar bay doors.

With the angle the ship had hit the ground at, just walking through wasn't always feasible. Jale and Jesse clambered awkwardly over the hulls of shuttles and starfighters in the hangar. Jale kept one eye on the clone as they went. He didn't trust Jesse not to start waving that blaster around again, or worse.

"Here," Jale said when he found a starfighter that wasn't completely crumpled in the impact. "Give me a hand."

"Clearly you work on your own," Jesse said. "Can't you handle this shit?"

Jale rolled his eyes and slammed his foot into the window. It took a few tries, but it finally shifted under his weight and shattered inward.

"Wait here, then," Jale said. "And if I find something that's obviously personal, I'll take it and I won't tell you."

He smirked at the sound Jesse made as he climbed up to watch as Jale swung himself inside.

There wasn't quite enough room for Jale to get his tools from his pack. He looked up at Jesse, weighing his options, and decided he would just have to remove what he could by hand. Jale crouched over the control panel and got to work prying it open with his fingernails.

"Wouldn't that work better with a tool of some kind?" Jesse asked. Jale scowled and gave the panel a vicious tug. It finally popped loose, bending one of his nails in the process. Jale bit back a curse. He didn't want to give the clone any satisfaction.

"I happen to be good at what I do," Jale said with dignity. Jesse snorted.

"Right," he said. "Who wouldn't boast of their skills in graverobbing?"

Normally when dealing with bitchy assholes Jale would imagine the wires he was tugging were the person's hair. Unfortunately, Jesse had only the barest hint of fuzz on his scalp. Jale tugged the targeting system out of the ship and settled for pretending he'd just shoved Jesse off the starfighter's hull.

"You got your prize. Can we go?" Jesse asked as Jale pulled himself back up.

"You can, if you want to walk around with that head wound on an unfamiliar moon. I have more work to do."

"It's healed," Jesse said.

"So you just didn't wipe off the dried blood as some kind of fashion choice?"

"If you're so worried about me, we ought to go."

"Don't read into it," Jale scoffed. "With you here, I can carry more, which means we're both less likely to get dumped on the first hellpit of a planet that crew finds." He hopped down. Jesse followed more slowly; his face twitched as he touched the ground, like he was in pain. Jale wondered if the clone was hurt anywhere other than his head. His mother would eat him alive if she knew he was dragging an injured man around a wreck instead of finding medical care, but then again it wasn't like his mother would ever meet Jesse.

"And when are you going to be satisfied? What are you looking for?"

"Anything I can sell," Jale said grimly. The floor slanted up away from them, made even harder to navigate by the wall that had been punctured in the crash and now poked jagged edges into Jale's way. Awkwardly, he climbed the wreckage, hoping Jesse wouldn't test his larger bulk on it until Jale had made it up. He had no such luck - Jesse apparently refused to let Jale out of his sight - but thankfully the surface held.

Jale looked into the hall, trying to see where he should go next.

"What's this way?" he asked. "Engines?"

"Medbay," Jesse said tightly.

"Oh, good," Jale said. "That shit sells."

"You're not touching the medbay," Jesse said. "I'll take you to the engine room. But you aren't going anywhere near - near the medbay."

"Something you don't want me to see?" Jale asked.

"Someone I don't want to unbury," Jesse said. Jale couldn't hold in a small "ew" at the thought. He hadn't realized there might be bodies in there, but decomposition certainly wasn't his thing. He could stick with the rest of it today.

The engine room was still a little smoky, even days after the crash. Jale gave the hyperdrive a wide berth. He'd have to be an idiot to poke around there.

Some of the fuel reserves were intact, and Jale carefully inspected it to be sure he wasn't going to blow them up if he took a barrel.

"I'm not carrying that," Jesse said. Jale rolled his eyes.

"I can manage it," he said.

Jesse clearly didn't believe him. Jale, who normally rolled barrels like these, scowled and heaved it up into his arms.

"You're an idiot," Jesse observed.

"Shut up," Jale grunted, setting the barrel down by the door.

"Is that it?" Jesse asked. Jale sighed, turning to look. The engines were worse off than he'd hoped, but he could probably strip a few parts.

"I'm going to head up there," Jale said, indicating the upper level.

"The lifts aren't going to work."

"I have done this before, thank you. I know what I'm doing."

Grateful for the awkward slant of the ship, Jale hoisted himself up on a computer and jumped for a sort of ledge that had been created when something on the other side slammed into the wall. Carefully, he snuck along it and reached up for the edge of the catwalk.

"You're not tall enough for that!"

Jale jumped at the clone's voice, and frantically grabbed at the surface beneath him.

"Are you trying to kill me?" he demanded. Jesse raised an eyebrow as he peered up at Jale. Jale hated him a little more.

The worst of it was that Jesse wasn't wrong. Jale took his bag off his back and pulled a rope from it. With a toss, a careful knot, and an emphatic tug, he had another way up. Jale began the climb, trying to ignore the ache in his shoulders and the expressions he imagined Jesse making.

The upper level was a lot less stable than it had looked. It creaked under Jale's feet. He drew a steadying breath and carefully did not look down.

"No wonder this ship crashed. You people can't even put railings on these walkways," Jale called, trying to distract himself from the shaking under his feet.

"Is everything a joke to you?" Jesse snapped. "Why don't you dedicate some of that thought to keeping yourself from falling and shut up about my dead siblings?"

Jale grimaced. He could, perhaps, see how that had been in poor taste.

He wasn't wrong, though.

He found the equipment he was looking for, a kind of monitor to help look at the hyperdrive when it was unstable. It was one of the few elements of an engine this big that could be installed on smaller ships like the one he'd begged passage on. Unfortunately for him, it was significantly better secured here than on the smaller wrecks he'd been working lately.

Jale started to unscrew the corners of the monitor. Three were reachable, but the far top corner was just out of range as the walkway curved away from the monitor.

"Almost done?" Jesse called as the catwalk groaned.

"I just have to get this screw -"

His joke about railings came back to haunt him. Jale's foot slipped as he leaned out over the gap, sending him tumbling. He flailed, barely managing to grab the edge. He was dangling over the gap - not as far down as if the engines were below, but enough that he'd break a bone or two. Jale wondered if he could swing himself enough to land where Jesse was -

Where was Jesse?

"Hey, idiot!"

Jale nearly let go in his surprise at seeing Jesse kneeling above him. With a grunt, Jesse grabbed him by the forearms.

"Try not being deadweight," Jesse said through gritted teeth. Jale dug his fingernails into Jesse's arms in response as the clone pulled him up. For a second, he was on top of the clone, trying to catch his breath. Annoyingly, Jesse had nice eyes.

Then Jesse shoved at his chest.

"Get up," he snapped. "How the hell are you still alive? You can't have been doing this long."

"As though you're the expert?" Jale spat. He got to his feet. Begrudgingly, because this was another thing his mother would eat him alive about, he added, "Thanks for the save."

"Yeah, well," Jesse said. "Don't read too much into it."

#jale: god jesse is such an asshole #me: no sweetheart you are. youre the bitch. its ok just calm down about it #star wars #clone wars #fanfic #jesse lives au #arc trooper jesse #also side note jesse is in fact talking about his memories of kix when he talks about 'unburying' its just that jale doesnt do metaphor #APPARENTLY tumblr posted this without my knowledge so now i am rewriting the back half of it. what the fuck. i want my computer back #Jale (oc)

[richardsondavis]

Was reading some comments over at KotakuInAction about the current Skullgirls drama about censorship and stuff and I really just want to cry on how so toxic and putrid that comment section was,Damn! 

Even the Steam reviews of Skullgirls isn’t that damn toxic, they all explain themselves in ways and I understand it but I can’t really empathize with them much. I do feel sorry that they feel betrayed, I know what I felt when I first found out about the rewrite of SCP-847, a sad day that was. Still despise that rewrite. I take it it is similar to that feeling with more money and time involved, I guess.

I played Skullgirls on mobile before, got invested into the lore and the panty shots were an added bonus. I personally didn’t think much of it but in the end it was not too bad but my time on feminist internet did make me more aware of what sexualization does and at times I have become quite uncomfortable observing and viewing some sexualizing stuff that I did not purposefully look up. 

Although I’ve checked it out and aside from the removal of filia’s pantyshots they also changed a fuckton, Filia not getting pantyshots is a miss. It is one of the appeals for that, the traditional pantyshot of a teenager in anime. Something I purposefully look up. 

It’s only uncomfortable when it appears unannounced in certain series. I may sound like a hypocrite here but I assure you I am not. It is a matter of context. 

They also changed the digital artbook people paid for man!!! Fuck that! That is highway robbery. I am in support of the outrage here bro and brosettes. Damn!

Fuck the devs, man. Hobie Brown would disapprove of this shit bros. 

I will be honest, I am somewhat not really believing in all I do write here. I do trust the ideas of them and I do hope that one day I’ll be an Alex Hamilton, one who stands for something rather than an Aaron Burr. 

#skullgirls #skullgirls controversy #filia medici #censorship #my two cents #toxic #the anti-sjws are actually in the right this time #support them #these changes are unwelcome or give the people a refund

[pacificgasandelectric]

maedhros in valinor thinky-thoughts

this is just a thing that I’ve had turning over in my head for a few months now. (kind of like a rock tumbler.) there’s obviously a lot of different Versions of Maedhros out there, and a few different takes on the Essential Quality of his character (running the gamut from “lots” to “minimal” across several different axes including “loyalty to Fëanor”, “love and/or general positive regard for his brothers”, and “conscience”) so I thought I’d toss my hat in the ring about… none of these, and instead share my Personal Thoughts on a version of Maedhros in the Noontide Of Valinor that I find compelling.

(long post ahoy; full text under cut or on dreamwidth)

I agree with everyone that he’s got a Genius for politics (I called him THEE political luminary of Beleriand in the tags of a tumblr post a couple weeks back and I’ll stand by that forever) but I honestly am not super into the version where he’s busy Politicking Super Good back in Valinor. I think that while the skillset & character traits that contributed to the quality “is capable of managing the hell out of a permanently ongoing and near-apocalyptic crisis situation AND can convince the various factions of the Noldorin Exiles to actually work together, however reluctantly”, which was what made him able to lead his faction effectively in Beleriand, hold Himring even when the entire Eastern March was actively On Fire And Under Attack, and convince a FUCKTON of people to ally for the Union (however badly it ended. rip Fingon), were indubitably impressive, they did Not in fact translate well to being an effective participant in the extremely stable and (presumably) administrivia-heavy environment of Tirion’s government

the Maedhros I’ve been rock tumbling was a dancer, didn’t particularly like the formalities of court politics in Valinor (which frankly were probably a fucking nightmare for anyone who didn’t loooove Doing Formalities, because there was nothing pressing going on in terms of stuff to manage, so the administrative aspect was all keeping track of this decade’s numbers for long-established logistics and the ceremonial aspect was probably carrying out traditional ceremonies so long-established they were practically calcified such as “fancy dinner” and “fancy party (sometimes with artistic exhibit or performance)” and “fancy dinner party”. but I digress) and therefore wasn’t likely to have spent a significant amount of time learning administration or other aspects of leadership from Finwë beyond what was Required of him as a prince.

the main reasons I like this is that (1) it acknowledges that there’s more than one type of political leadership, and a person who’s good at crisis management (and even enjoys it) would not necessarily be good at, or attracted to, Valinor politics, and (2) it emphasizes the ways that Valinor and Beleriand are so Different as settings AND that there are some… I don’t know if I want to say “advantages” because that’s not precisely it (even tho I am very much on team “the Flight of the Noldor was not WRONG and the Valar were are least a LITTLE full of shit”), but certainly Opportunities in Beleriand for the characters to discover things abt themselves etc that were not present in Valinor.*

which is not to say that I think Maedhros didn’t also (grow to) like the logistics side of leading in Beleriand, because I think he did, but there’s an Experiential difference between “keeping track of details that aren’t important to me and that other people can handle just as well” and “keeping track of details that are Immediately Relevant to me (and my thousands of subjects) and also that I don’t trust anyone else to handle”. like especially with The Autism (bc if you tell me that Fëanor wasn’t autistic I will laugh in your face and with that + the rest of the canon details we have, I think I have a pretty good leg to stand on to make the case that all his kids were autistic too) I can very much see Maedhros becoming an Administration Enjoyer, but I also think it’s contextual and would not have happened uh… probably Ever in Valinor.

(also, bringing this back around to me headcanoning him as a dancer, I think that post-Angband, Maedhros doesn’t/can’t dance, because that’s just One More Thing to take away from him.)

so, yeah. that’s my dancer!maedhros manifesto, or really my “maedhros wasn’t Into Politics until he got to Beleriand” manifesto with a little bit of bonus “I think dancers are hardcore and cool” sentiment sprinkled on top.

*Obviously it sucks that they had to go thru All That to get to the self-discovery bit and also yeah maybe “I am So Good at staying calm when people are getting murdered around me” is not really something anyone WANTS to know about themself, but I stand by my point.

#mine #silm #maedhros #idk i mean this is lowkey just One version i've been rock tumbling #but like... i really do think that 'good at beleriand politics' is just SO not the same skillset as 'good at valinor politics' #silmarillion

[triple--a--threat]

so about voltron

idk where this post is gonna go, but i have thoughts and feelings about this show and needed to get them out. so. rambley post it is.

i dont think it's new information for anyone that voltron and its fandom suck major ass, unless you've been living under a rock, and in that case, get back under that rock sweetie. this show sucks a fuckton and this rambling will be nothing more than critique and bashing. anyways

at the end of season 2 shiro was going to die in the original "plan" as far as we know. we were gonna get a heroic sacrifice and the team would go back to its 1984 setup with allura piloting the blue lion. except of course the machinations of the universe are beyond us so shiro did not in fact. die. he was the most popular character and his merch sold the most, so he couldn't possibly die this early on. who else would've made dreamworks their pure gold bars?

so as daddy dreamworks demanded, the writers delivered and un-unalived shiro, completely disregarding their original flimsy shambling excuse of a plan in exchange for among the worst plotlines i have ever seen anywhere. possibly the worst that exist in all of television ever. we got 4 seasons (well really 2) of completely directionless, contrieved, contradictory, and mind-numbing bullshit. stuff happens because someone wanted it to. 2 eps later something very contradictory happens because someone else wanted it to. i cannot stress this enough it feels like the writters were split into factions each of whom had very different ideas about literally everything in this fucking show. some of the dialogue actually feels like someone just wrote down the arguments and fighting going down in the writer's room. shit was made up along the way as the show went on for far longer than it had the right to, and for each and every fucking plotline the writers were divided and kept on shooting themselves (and the others too don't forget) in the foot for the sliver of chance that their story will be canon. just completely backstabbing each other for the sake of it and no regard for what is actually happening. it would be hilarious if it hadn't destroyed my sanity. and for a bit of a personal opinion, a liitle ymmv, none of the writers had any good ideas actually. even ignoring the nonsense opposite fuckery happening, none of the plotlines were good lmao. please end this and me oh god.

as a result we got a completely wish-washy, flip-flopping, self-contradictory, reductive mess of a show which never had any good original ideas or story much less a fucking plot or even a plan in some direction. the writers had no goal except to get their plot on the paper disjoint from everything else with jackshit regard to the overarching storyline. well if there was anything resembling an overarching storyline in the first place.

ig i'll talking specifically about the some of the worst offenders in the "the writers never thought of anything" situation - the allura racism arc, the clone shiro arc, and fucking lotor. oh my fucking god motherfucking lotor. holy shit they fucked him up.

i dunno where to begin with the allura racism arc except for the fact that it was DUMB. completely out of the blue and so fucking forced. for a princess of a diplomatic people she sure is fuckin racist for no fucking reason. even if she doesn't trust any and all galra (ig they didn't have unity in diversity activities in altea), she has no reason to not trust keith. like. my guy what. he proved himself as a paladin of voltron and has directly and indirectly saved her ass. why is she racist oh my god. and why doesn't coran hold any animosity towards the galra? he also lost his homeworld (and alfor)? and he lived on altea for far longer? ig women are emotional or smth. man. i also liked (absolutely despised) the the fact that it kinda took a #notallgalra turn and i was jesting about it and then they actually said that in the fucking show. hey allura not all galra are bad. hey allura stop being a bitch. and then the writers forgot about it btw and made allura racist again 2 seasons later. hmm. wut. also they never checked their own internalised racism or whatever as *points to zethrid's design*. lmao. WAIT also the conflation of racism with speciesism. yknow. using anti speciesism messages as anti racism messages. classic white person living in california moment.

alright the clone shiro arc. because its the keith and shiro show and we can't loose half of our money milking cow. and we shan't make them explicitly gay. only allude to it and sprinkle in family brother stuff so nobody actually thinks they're gay. that would be blasphemous. we shall continue with our pseudo-incest for the rest of the show and give shiro a last minute husband so they don't haul our ass for gaybaiting and burying our gays because we somehow managed to do both of them. anyways where was i. oh right shiro died but they had to bring him back blah blah but they made a clone of him for? reasons? while the real shiro is in the subconscious of the black lion or smth for unexplained reasons. i have absolutely no idea why they did that. they have a carbon copy of shiro in terms of everything - personality, fighting capabilities, homoerotic scenes with keith - for jackshit reasons while they could have the actual real shiro running around but i guess not. the clone is the exact same as the real guy until he isn't. because. we need more drama in this over extended bullshit show i guess??? clearly we don't have enough stuff going on we must make it more exhausting and confusing to watch. also clone shiro is as good and noble as normal shiro until he got a headache and now he's evil at the flick of a switch and retains none of his previous personality and is therefore irredeemably evil and nothing can be done to save him. he's bad and evil and must be forgotten. they never mention him again later on except for a throwaway comment on how evil he was except he wasn't evil guys you're not gonna fool anyone. oh and btw the real shiro's soul or whatever got supplanted in the clone's body because idk man where his original body went and he retained all the memories of his clone self because isn't that convenient. fuck everything. also this arc culminates in the best episode of this show despite everything wrong with the events leading up to it and the way they handle lotor in this episode. more on him later. it's literally among my favourites now 10/10 would watch again it was so fucking good. kill me. i.

again, i don't know where to begin with lotor - such an interesting character who got the short end of the stick. the worst victim of the writers' squabbles. i genuinely liked him a lot and then. such a shame. well there are other characters- oh no. there aren't any other even remotely interesting characters. not good, no no, no one is good in this show, but just fun to watch.

he starts off as an antagonist to team voltron but he's not actually a threat. he maybe wants to use them to further his goals but really he isn't the villain per se. which sucks because there aren't any villains in the show now cause the previous main villain is out of commission for who knows how long. and then whoops lotor has to kill one of his generals and then the other generals betray him and now i guess he's with voltron now. sure why not. interesting turn of events. at least it isn't boring. i'm having fun can't you see. then he kills the previous villain (who is his father did i mention that) in episode two of season five. yes s05e02. i dont know any more than you do. and now it sucks even more cause theres literally no fucking villain rn. then he and allura start working on quintessence or whatever because she learns that he is half altean and btw do you remember she is racist. now since he is not 100% galra (bad people) but half galra half altean (good people. her people) she smooches him and stuff and. also btw all this fuckery is happening alongside the climax of clone shiro arc. yeah this show may suck. whatever evil shiro who wasnt evil is defeated and lotors really helped team voltron and the galra empire is going to stop conquering worlds and the show is going to end on a mid note. well.

EXCEPT SIKE BITCH LOTOR IS PURE CRAZY EVIL FUCK YOU FOR EVER ROOTING FOR HIM. FUCK HIS WHOLE CHARACTER BEING ALL "IM NOT MY FATHER" AND THEN AT THE END 180ING MAKING HIM JUST LIKE HIS FATHER. FUCK EVERYTHING FUCK THIS SHOW YOU THOUGHT IT WAS SOMEWHAT GOOD. WELL FUCK YOU IT AINT EVEN SOMEWHAT GOOD.

i. im just so disappointed in his character and the plot twist for the sake of twist that i cant even express how disappointed i am except for shouting through the use of all caps. one final fuck this show

#voltron #voltron critical #idk the tags man #sorry for the paraghraph breaks #well lack thereof #and copious amounts of 'btw' 'and' 'also' #i don't know any other conjunctions apparently #or how to transition between ideas. idk don't be mean to me about it.

[realhankmccoy]

You want to really piss me off? Be a rich person who acts like they're poor or from poverty. The only person I really allow to get away with it is Courtney Love, who's the ultimate trust fund rock star baby... probably even more than Malkmus, amiright? I guess there's a metric fuckton of trust fund baby rockstars, and I don't want to be bothered with finding the list of them right now. It's just in very poor taste to lie and manipulate about your origins to make it seem like all the working class is a bunch of failures -- but you, you somehow! and your own bootstraps made magic... it was hard but anyone can do it, right????

What happens when you do this is other rich kids swallow it and then bombard you with this bullshit. IN YOUR FACE WITH PAVEMENT! IN YOUR FACE WITH HOLE! I can't tell you the number of times shitty people from nice backgrounds have done that to me.

I mean, to be expected to swallow this shit over and over again... But Courtney Love is in very poor taste, so hey... In fact, I don't even allow it from her. If I had to do deep investigations and analysis of the producers of 'the product' every time I decided it was acceptable to appreciate it, I'd probably go nuts. People should be aware, at least. Hole is a lying, manipulative trust fund band. Bowie flirted with fascism. Some people were overt fascists as in more than just a game. Some were overt commies and people consequently died. Some were conservatives and the oceans boiled. Somebody like the Musks -- no, no, and more fuckin' no. Somebody like Hillary -- we was FLAT BROKE when we was left the White House, hyuck! Somebody like Ivanka -- my father's name is a liability! Stop it with the hoodwinking and manipulation, you're making yourself look like a terrible person... which, in many ways, you are.

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

i agree with you tumblr is pathetic incase of new jackles content :( many people here have a problem when he doesn't speak but when he does they are out saying crap. ik its all joke but doesn't it have boundaries too?

there's just literally no winning with some people. just dont focus on him if you dislike him that much? why even listen to the podcast if you're going into it with the specific intention of tearing apart everything that's said (which btw - nothing he said imho was bad in the slightest. idk how many times I have to say he is not going to bash the finale. this is a man who doesn't like drama and conflict - he's been open in his own struggles with the ending but also very clear that he is not going to invalidate EITHER the folks who hated it or the ones who didn't [also people keep equating that portion of fandom w c*sties but that's not always the case so to say he's 'advocating' for them in not bashing the finale is ridiculous to me. this was the end of a 15 year span of work he put a fuckton of effort and heart into. he gets to be proud of that; that part is actually about him and deservedly so].

also to those who don't like the prequel idea, simply don't watch it! absolutely valid for anyone who feels this way! but its also valid for those of us who like Robbie's work, who trust CMP and Jensen/Danneel with the story to be excited about it and new content/details.

I just don't get why its fun for people to shit on things, CONSTANTLY. we get on certain corners of fandom for seeking out actors just to trash them, so it makes it doubly frustrating for me when I see our side doing the same.

anyway, solidarity. sending you a hug and lots of excitement for all the new content I am personally very glad we got today!

***I've been clear I'm a jensen positive blog from the get go so I'm hopeful this response won't get me a barrage of hate in my inbox since those offended by my takes have since peaced, but if anyone IS that bored today just know it's a waste of your time bc I'll simply delete it :D

#you-cant-spell-subtext-without-asks #nonnie #sorry this got so long but I do appreciate im not the only one frustrated #look at me saying im leaving the site for the day and just. not

[barrendome]

the 2b2t survival guide (revamped!)

are you planning to play on 2b2t? have you been playing but can’t seem to get out of spawn? or have you been waiting 12 hours in queue to no avail?

in that case, have i got some stuff for you! heres a handy guide about how to actually play, and some tips to help along the way!

step one: preparing

you can just hop right in and go, but it is smart to know a bit beforehand.

know what you're getting into. the server has no rules to it, so you just have to expect a fuckton of disgusting shit. this includes but isnt limited to nazis, homophobes, racists, transphobes, and more, and youre bound to run into them. you need to just accept that, and ignore it.

get a hacked client. while you can just play vanilla, having a hacked client on will drastically help you survive and get out of spawn, and at the very least make it a little less stressful. id suggest impact client, a free 1.12 hacked client. do not, and i repeat DO NOT use clients advertised on 2b2t chat. only trustable clients i know of are impact, future, and wurst. 

make sure your client, version, and 2b2t itself is safe. this might be me just being paranoid, but after the log4j incident id say its smart to play it safe. check the reddit and make sure whatever client youre using is safe. also, if anyone knows if 2b2t is currently safe to play rn, please send me an ask!

make a plan. although this is optional, its smart to do. you can just wing it if you wanna, but it’s helpful to have a goal for what you wanna do in the server.

check the reddit. it will tell you beforehand if the server is active, and also if there is a serious exploit going on, theres a chance youll be able to find out about it beforehand and protect yourself from being affected by it. this is how i stayed safe from log4j and the authentication exploit!

read this guide. seriously, i promise, its at least a BIT helpful!

step two: queue

queue is basically inevitable, but there are a few things you can do to make the wait less painful!

decide if you want priority. priority queue is a godsend, it takes 30 min at MOST to join the server! but on the other hand, its 20 dollars per month. if you’re planning on playing for a long time and dedicating lots of time to playing? get priority. if you just wanna check the server out? don’t worry about buying it.

join when nobody else would. the best times i’ve found are near 1-3am, or in early mornings. also, always on weekdays, its MUCH harder to join during weekends. you’ll still have to wait hours, but not as long as you would otherwise.

do something else. multitasking is the best way to wait. leave queue running in the background and check on it whenever you can, but fill your time with other stuff. i usually draw or watch videos when waiting!

pray for a server restart. when it restarts, turn on auto-reconnect (if you have that) or just keep on trying to connect. you’ll get onto the server extremely quick if you’re able to join right after a restart.

step three: common sense

you gotta use normal common sense, but also server-unique common sense.

remember: there are no rules. people are going to kill you. people are going to grief you. people are going to say gross shit. the worst kinds of people are here on the server, you have to accept that.

you aren’t safe. no matter how far away you are, or how nice that one person is. don’t get lulled into feeling secure, stay on edge. better safe than sorry.

don’t trust anyone. or at least be cautious of everybody. even if they give you gifts, even if they compliment you, dont trust anybody unless you know them personally. also, as a little sidenote, if somebody places down a bed for you and ushers you to sleep in it, DONT.

enderchests are your friend. you’re going to die, several times. so, keep any important things in your enderchest. for more space, put everything into shulker boxes and store the boxes in your enderchest. this is why silk touch pickaxes are something you’ll need: because your enderchest is the only safe place for your items.

signs are the best communication. carry a sign with you, and read all the signs you find. its not important, but its fun to read what people write, and its nice to make your own mark on the world with just a simple sign.

what you build is gonna go. no matter how nice it looks, how far out it is, how tiny it is, whatever. its how 2b2t works. when you build, you have to remember that its going to get destroyed one day. remember to take screenshots of your builds! and griefing only proposes an opportunity to rebuild it bigger and better than before.

everyone hates new players. don’t openly say you’re new. just stick to yourself for the first while of joining. dont ask for kits. if you get stuck, dont ask for help. in this case, doing it alone is safer than getting help.

you aren’t special. oh, so you watched a bunch of fit videos and know everything about the server? no you don’t, shut up. you’re gonna spam things in chat and grief a bunch of builds to become a notable player? you’re gonna become a minor annoyance, shut up. you read this guide and now know how to become the best 2b2t player ever? my guide is still shit, shut up.

step four: chat

so you’ve joined, and you connect to see.. the constant spam of chat.

hide the chat. go into settings, and turn chat off. usually chat isn’t worth looking at, except for warning about server restarts. if you wanna keep chat on, just turn down the opacity.

use /ignore. theres bots constantly flooding the chat, so if you wanna keep chat on, spend time quickly ignoring all the bots. you can also use this command to get rid of all the nasty racists and more in chat!

don’t ask for help. you dont really want to let people know youre new and need help. its rare that people will actually help you, at best you’ll probably get ignored, and at worst they’ll just kill or trap you. you can get through this by yourself!

if you have a question, ask google. like the point above, asking for help isn’t a good option. search stuff up on google or the 2b2t subreddit before asking chat. and try not to ask obvious questions either.

dont get into arguments. its like arguing in comments but... worse. and while nothing bad will probably come of it, it wont help at all in making your point heard. people will probably just laugh at you. as hard as it is, just ignore people that piss you off, and move on.

if youre an mcyt fan, dont mention it. this server hates dream stans or anything even slightly similar. so just avoid mentioning it in chat.

dont fall for stupid tricks. dont post your address even if they say itll censor it. dont press alt+f4 even if they say itll give you good hacks. if you see a message from some famous player with a bunch of symbols spammed from someone before, its probably fake.

step five: escaping spawn

five steps in and im only JUST getting to the part where you escape? how long even IS this guide?!

turn your hacks on. hacks that i personally find come in handy is storage esp, player esp, tracers, search, light, nametags, auto-reconnect, and anti-hunger. (names may vary depending on client, these are the names for impact.) dont forget to customize these hacks to your needs, such as having tracers and esp only track onto players! also, make sure you have hacks like freecam and xray set to easy keybinds.

customize your search hack. search is EXTREMELY helpful, especially with escaping spawn! id suggest having your search light up for valuables (dragon eggs, player heads, beacons) food (melons, potatos, carrots, wheat crops) and other helpful items (portals, signs, beds)

use the highways. there are highways on each 0 coordinate, as well as every diagonal coordinate. they are there for you to use, take advantage of them! once you get far enough, though, stray away from the highway. never settle down near a highway. just be aware of withers near or on the highways! id suggest going down the melon highway, which starts around (0 ~ -2630) and goes up on the -X coordinate!

save your hunger bar. be patient and try not to run or jump. its hard, but its important. most deaths are from hunger in the first while of playing, so just try not to get hungry. for this exact reason, the main thing you’re looking for is food.

collect, store, die, repeat. i never did this, but my boyfriend did, and it worked incredibly well. he would collect as many resources as he could, store them in an enderchest whenever he saw one, and then either die of hunger or something else. he’d repeat this process until he had enough stuff in his enderchest to help get him out of spawn.

don’t go into the nether right away. spawn nether is a guaranteed portal trap, and close-by to nether spawn is extremely risky, especially nowadays. at around 2000 blocks overworld minimum, you’re probably safe to travel via nether, but be careful.

use the nether highways! the nether highways, like the overworld highways, are on every 0 coordinate and diagonal coordinates, as well as a few ring roads. this is the easiest way out of spawn. but dont carry important stuff on you, as people do patrol the highways to kill new players.

if you dont want to escape by yourself, baritone is your best friend! this may be an impact-only thing, though. in chat, do “.b goto [coordinates]” (without the quotation marks) so for example: “.b goto -420 69 1000″ and the bot will move to those coordinates without your input, while you can go afk as it moves.

20000 blocks is the safer zone, but its still spawn territory. anything under 10k is bound to get griefed, and you may run into players. 10k to 20k is fairly safe, but still bound to get griefed. around 50k is the minimum for you to be making a permanent base, but even then, its very VERY smart to go 100k or farther out.

step six: outside spawn

so you’re out of the major spawn area... now what?

find food, farm food. get as much food as you can, thats the most important thing to do at this moment. make sure you have as much food as you could need, and store some in your enderchest.

make a temporary base. you can make a small house, a hole, or even just a dirt hut. just make sure you have a place to store all your extra stuff, and a place to stay for now. (sidenote, don’t put a nether portal right beside your house.)

find or make a bed. later on, beds aren’t a big deal, but at first they definitely are. try to find or make a bed, and set your spawn somewhere. i’d suggest hiding the bed somewhere near your temporary base, but don’t make it visible.

get geared up. use your xray and get some diamonds, look through dungeons or go fishing for enchanted books, make yourself tools, etc. its best to get what you need now that you’re out of spawn.

go fishing. you can get food, enchanted books, xp, etc. going fishing is actually super useful. the autofish hack is your friend right now. but don’t go afk when fishing, you can get kicked for it.

visit nether highways. if you have nothing on you, theres a small chance a high-level player could stumble upon you, take pity, and give you stuff. just make sure to be cautious the entire time, and make sure to put anything you get into your enderchest. this may not work as well anymore, since lots of players now seem to resort to killing rather than giving. but its worth a shot!

step seven: last notes

some last little tips and tricks you should know before jumping in!

make a goal if you haven’t already. if you wanna be a nomad? plan where you’re gonna wander. if you’re gonna make a huge base? plan where to build it and go out there. if you’re gonna go visit monuments? figure out which ones and their coordinates, and start walking. gonna join a group? figure out which one would be safe and fun to join, and try to get in.

get as far from spawn as possible. unless you wanna stay near spawn, try and get 100,000 blocks away or further. and if you really wanna keep a base intact, do NOT stay near any of the major highways.

take lots of screenshots! screenshots of cool bases, signs, anything! and dont forget to grab coordinates of every cool thing you screenshot as well. who knows when you’ll want to revisit those things in the future!

if you wanna be a nomad... travel in circles around spawn! 10k out in a circle, 20k, 15k... however far you feel like! you could also go back to spawn, and take a highway completely out as well! just... explore. have fun with it! make sure to read signs!

if you wanna make a group... collect all your friends who play on the server, or anyone who just seems trustworthy (psst.. like me...) and form a group by yourself! while you can join pre-existing groups, the real fun of having a group comes from shared bonds and trust among members!

visit some monuments! its very fun to go exploring, and especially to explore around important places. for example, theres wrath outpost, which is inside spawn, or ziggytown, which is close to spawn. you can just search up coordinates, and most times you’ll be able to find coordinates to whichever famous place you want to visit.

if youre interested in 2b2t lore, dont just watch fitmc! there are a LOT of other 2b2t creators! some of my personal suggestions is salc1, fastvincent1, and barrendome (not me, the youtuber!) id also suggest thecampingrusher’s videos, they genuinely show an interesting side to the server and the rusher war. a few more story oriented things are thejudgeholden’s 2b2t comic, and the 2b2t chronicles on youtube!

if youre interested in 2b2t history, heres some other sources with some really good stuff! this will be updated as time goes on. all the youtubers mentioned above have very good 2b2t history content, but theres also places like the 2b2t blog that have a lot of cool history on it! theres also a couple of 2b2t wikis, like these ones, but theyre community led, so some information on them may not be 100% correct.

have fun! as rough this server can be to play on, theres a lot of cool stuff you can find, and its important to find joy in the chaos!

i hope that this guide served to be a bit more useful than my previous one!

i STILL may have forgotten things even during the revamp, so feel free to send me anything i missed! but i hope that everything i was able to write down will be enough to help anybody that wants to join 2b2t.org, the oldest anarchy server on minecraft!

#2b2t #2builders2tools #anarchy server #minecraft #mineblr #minecraft server #mcyt #fitmc #barrendome #salc1 #minecraft guide #and after a year i still dont know what to tag this as.

[docholligay]

So I don't forget to remind you tomorrow and also because I'm sure many others would love to know: Please share your tiny feet resources for finding shoes one can wear with a suit! ^‿^

Yes!

Okay so I have tiny little feet. I'm a size 6.5-7 in US sizes, which effectively puts me out of most "Men's shoes."

But I do, from time to time, like to wear a suit! And I like to look good in it, and part of that is having the right footgear. So here are my personal best options for small feet, along with a handful of companies that also make small shoes, but I either recommend with some qualification, or don't know about quality.

Best Pick: Allen Edmonds

This is one of those things where I'm gonna get hatemail and passive aggressive reblogs because tumblr is broke bitch central, and if you're a broke bitch who can't afford these and isn't interested in laying away for them, that is fucking fine! But you don't have to tell me about it. I MYSELF DO NOT YET HAVE A PAIR OF THESE. Please trust that I've read the fucking Terry Pratchett novel.

Anyway, Allen Edmonds is an incredibly high quality shoe, and they are full leather and recraftable, which is something you should be looking for in a shoe you want to spend actual human money on. It means the whole damn shoe can be resoled, uppers fixed, etc. These shoes can last you twenty years.

But Doooooccc they're so expensive. OH THEY FOR SURE ARE. Let me tell you how I afford so many high-end goods. It's called ebay! I set alerts for shit, and I am ON IT. Takes me months or years, but eventually things come to me, generally. There's a size five pair of these on ebay right fucking now, lightly used, in the brown wingtip I desperately want, for less than 70 bucks total. "Okay well then why the fuck aren't you buying them?" They're in a wide and I have tiny narrow feet my sadness is total, my heart JUMPED when the listing came up.

Midrange option: Josef Seibel

I wear a hellfired fuckton of Josef Seibel. These are my current dress shoes you're staring at. They do come in a patent, but I think these dress up and down better. This is technically a woman's shoe! I recommend the brand in general for "women's shoes" that look like "Men's shoes" Like these pirate boots on clearance at Dillard's. They have a fair few styles that look 'masculine' or whatever.

You can OFTEN find these new or lightly used on ebay.

Cheap (TO PEOPLE NAMED DOC WHO ARE ME. I AM NOT THE KEEPER OF YOUR BUDGET): Florsheim boys

These are often at least leather and so will last you a full season or two of wear unlike "vegan leather" which is fucking plastic. The soles are not as well-made, and they aren't as shockingly comfortable as the two above brands, but I have TOTALLY bought and worn these in the past, especially if they have a jazzy colorway on clearance.

Other places or things I offer up with qualifications:

Tomboy Toes: They are ~queer owned~ but frankly, I'm not an identity buyer, and for the price I find Josef Seibel to have a more comfortable and quality product.

Just buying fucking cheap boys' shoes from Target or some shit: Totally doable, will not last you very long at all, best if you're a very occasional suit wearer and not interested in walking much or far in them.

Red Wing: Only their Heritage line is quality, I don't find their offerings to look good with a suit.

Thursday Boot Company : High quality, or so I've heard but I don't find their boots to look good with a suit.

Clarks: They have a fantastic UK selection of brogues and such for women but fuck America I guess. If you're in the UK this is a great resource.

[mermaidsirennikita]

Hi love your blog! I wanted to ask, if you had any advice for mental health, being in your 20s, struggling to keep a job etc, and the general existential crisis that comes with it? Thank you!

Thank you! That's very kind.

As I'm not yet out of my 20s, I don't know if I'm the beeeest person to ask for advice. But generally speaking, what has helped me is:

A) The general idea that as long as you're still alive, you can keep going. You may suffer (extreme) setbacks, and you may not always enjoy being alive, but you can always progress and move forward in some way while you're alive. To be super real, I've suffered from suicidal ideation a good bit in the past, and this has been a big thing for me to keep in mind. I can always figure SOMETHING out if I'm kicking. I can't turn back the clock if I'm not.

B) Move the goalposts. I have super high expectations for myself, and I've come to realize that many of them are based on outdated ideas that honestly aren't relevant anymore, especially post-pandemic. Many of the standards I set for myself are based on a super America-centric concept of adulthood and independence, and seeing the way other people live and the perspectives on things like... Moving out on your own, financial independence, etc... Gave me a shock in a good way. There's actually a fuckton of truth to the idea of like, your 40s being your new 30s, your 30s being your new 20s, so on. One of the people I admire most did not find her true blue career until she was in her late forties. It's never too late.

C) If you haven't done it yet, individuating is important. I personally still struggle with this as I often feel obligated to bend and change my plans (long term or short term) for family and friends. It's been very important for me to realize that I don't have to do everything that's asked of me, and I'm not a bad person if I don't want to.

D) It may fucking suck, but for a while, you may have to do other things in an addition to a "main" gig. If you have long term goals like an academic career or an advanced degree, you may not be able to concentrate on that solely without assistance from other avenues. It sucks. Trust me, I know. But it's reality. Don't feel bad about it.

E) When you can, do some really simple shit for yourself. Read a book. Watch a show. Look up fanvids on Youtube. I don't care what it is--just do the little stuff. It can make a big difference.

F) Fake it til you make it. You may not always feel super fucking great, and you may not always be able to project the idea that you feel great (don't feel bad if you can't). But for me, having that compartmentalization and projecting a "I'm fucking good, and I fucking deserve your respect" attitude has been super helpful. Especially on a professional level. People do tend to respect you more if you demand their respect. I'm not saying that's right, but again, it's reality; and tbh, I personally feel *better* when I know that people feel like they have to check for me a little.

Anyway, I hope this helps. I'm sorry that it's rough out there. All we can do is keep going.