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thunderheadfred · 3 years

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🤚The Second Worst (Pt. 1/?)🤚

Part 2 of my Shigaraki Thesis Headcanons. HC's // The Second Worst: 1 - 2

The half-mad ghost of Shimura Tenko is in love with you, and your life is about to become a tragic wreck. -- AKA here's when I gave up on bullet points and went off the fuckin rails

I'm self-conscious about writing so much, so uhhhh, please be kind, hahaaa. This is rather long and involved. Are these still even HCs or just a self-indulgent AU outline? There are some mysteries we may never solve.

This is on AO3 now, if you prefer reading there. Anyway. Minors do not interact.

- - - - -

You met Tenko before the League existed.

Believe it or not, there are a million ways it might have happened, but in the end: you were both bargain-binning in Akihabara.

You reached for a copy of a collectible bullet-hell cute-'em-up (near-mint! CIB!!!) and accidentally bonked hands with a complete stranger. He flinched about five million feet away from you. Ouch. You're just a nobody, quirkless and average, but you didn't think you were THAT repulsive.

(You're not. Hell, even if you were, this guy couldn't care less. He barely registers that you have a face.)

(Shigaraki is accustomed to getting in and out of this shop in seconds. He always comes in before anyone else and goes straight home. -- Is that really home? Is 'home' a real place? -- ANYWAY he's already pirated this shit, god, why does he even care? He doesn't need to be here. Father doesn't like it. Is that why he's here? Just to do something Father doesn't like? That's pathetic.)

He's had at least ten complete internal arguments with himself before he so much as looks at you.

You know in the tenth of a second he actually meets your eyes... this fucker is going to fight you to the death over this game.

- - - The death match ends in a draw. He was not expecting you to know the first fucking thing about this game. Nobody knows about it, even in Japan. Who the fuck do you even think you are? Oh, no, he's still taking it. But... maybe he can show you how to play it it. He'll give you a little taste, just to make you jealous. He's got his hoodie pulled down like he's going to commit an act of terrorism. What little you can see of his face looks twitchy and messed up. If you have any survival instincts at all, they're kicking in right about now. But... why not. You're not going anywhere with this dude unsupervised, so you suggest a crowded web cafe down the street. The cafe has the necessary console... but the retro gaming booth is laughably small. The TV is about four inches across and you end up having to practically sit in his lap. You were sure this guy was a nasty fucking creep, but he's................ only mostly terrible. Way too angry, for sure. Has no idea how to have a normal, friendly conversation. Inadvertently insults you every other sentence and seems to have a deep-seated persecution complex.

You'd prefer to be mad about the awful company, but... he's obviously deprived of human contact. When it's established that you two share a lot of media fixations, he calms down and starts treating you a little more like a human being. Or at least like a fellow elite.

Wherever he came from, he doesn't seem to want to go back. He keeps pushing you to play one more level, pretending he wants to beat your score. You feel kinda bad for him. You get the distinct feeling that his life is a disaster. He looks like he's never had a full night of sleep in his life. He trips your trigger hairs in that 'is he gonna follow me home?' kind of way, but... up close, he's a lot more depressing than scary. At the very least, you want to buy him a stupidly cute dessert. Just... as thanks. For letting you try out the game and stuff. It's not a big deal, so just pick a flavor, okay? The world isn't actually that awful, y'know.

It's not even that impressive... Definitely not a great cafe. But he takes practically a full hour to eat a single slice of strawberry cake.

When the hoodie comes down. He's all shriveled and dried out, like someone left him him in the desert to die. He chews on his peeling bottom lip and nervously scratches his neck. He doesn't thank you for the cake. Which is fine. It's not a big deal. Actually, you wish he would eat faster; you feel weirdly responsible for him now.

Under all that mess he's... gorgeous? His hair is stunning: a bright, gleaming silver that catches the light. His bone structure is flawless. If it weren't for all the scars and the misanthropic slouch, he'd look like a fairy fucking prince.

You were not prepared for that. In another life he could have been a model, the type of guy who would never even look at you. But something bad happened to him. Something... very bad. Do you even want to know? You have no idea how to ask. Has anyone ever been nice to him? It doesn't seem like it. Should YOU be nice to him? You sort of want to try. - - - This becomes a regular thing. This weird little secret. You should probably tell someone when you see him, just in case you don't come back one day, but you say nothing; how the hell would you explain why you want to see him so bad? You don't know his full name. Maybe he's on a watch list. When he gives you a long string of random numbers so you can schedule meet-ups (is THAT his e-mail, really?) he tells you to just... call him Tenko. Or whatever. It doesn't matter. (He sneaks out when Father is deep in his plots. As long as he comes home on time, it doesn't really matter where he goes, right?) He brings a different game every time. He has an insane collection. Where does he get the money for all this? You know he doesn't work. God, is it drugs? It's probably drugs. Wherever these hidden gems came from, he proudly shows them off to you, like he's never had an audience before. It's sort of cringe-inducing, the way he one-ups and rubs every little victory in your face, desperate for attention.

But at the same time, you are becoming too... something...to mind. Do you... like him? He's not funny, but he thinks you are. His mouth is huge when he laughs. He seems to hate everyone but you, and you've had to earn the distinction of being merely tolerable. Still, he gets really excited about random shit like the garage kit black market and haunted dolls and the price of weed on the dark web.

And... strawberry cake. The realization hits you both at the same time when the waitress brings one piece with two forks. God, what the fuck, are you... are you dating? Quick, think. You look forward to seeing him, and don't even mind sitting close to him anymore. Sometimes you push your leg up against him just to see if he'll still flinch away... and he doesn't.

You jealously notice the way he touches everything but you: with delicate precision, one finger at a time. His large, elegant hands always have a pinky up like he's aspiring for a fiefdom, and you wonder what his skin feels like. You go home and dwell on the way he plucks flowering weeds out of the pavement in front of the cafe. The way he stands rooted to the spot as you leave, just... looking at nothing, unsmiling.

You watch his lips too much, and not just because you want to buy him chapstick. You catch him gaping at you all the time. You thought he was just creepy like that, but maybe... Yeah. I guess you are dating him. Shit. - - - Okay, so, yeah. Bringing him back to your place was definitely a bad idea. You know you shouldn't trust him, even if he is... apparently... your boyfriend? Sort of? You still don't have his phone number. So. Um. What now? You order overpriced pizza and queue up a campy horror movie. What the fuck are you even doing. You don't really think he's going to murder you anymore, but... still. Is the suburban massacre scene gonna give him ideas? Turns out, no. He doesn't like gore, even when the blood is neon pink. He gets upset. Like, really upset. Shaky and green, like he might puke on you. He can't stop scratching that scaly spot on his neck.

Tenko, are you crying? Fucking hell, did you just trigger him? Of course he has a traumatic past, it's carved all over his face. You're so fucking stupid. You don't know how to make it right. You want to hug him, kiss him... anything. But he's never really touched you, and you're too afraid to push now. It ruins the whole night. He leaves without explaining anything. Doesn't even say goodbye. He just. Leaves. Maybe you'll never see him again. Maybe that's for the best. Your chest hurts. - - - He shows up at your door a few weeks later. You haven't heard from him since that disastrous movie night. You had pretty much accepted that you'd broken up with a boyfriend you never actually had. But no. Apparently not.

This time, he’s brought his own entertainment. He's holding a boxed set of some show you're not familiar with. You're distracted by these weird little half-gloves he's wearing, like a cyberpunk hacker. That's a new look, and even if it's a bit edgelord adjacent, he makes it look cool. You tell him as much. It's the first time you've let on how attractive you find him. He's wearing a tight black shirt with a deep, deep V-neck. That's distracting too.

He clears his slender throat and doesn't look at you.

You try to apologize for before, but he's acting like it never happened. What are you even talking about? Have you seen this OVA or not? Get out of the way and let him in already. You've watched three episodes now, but you still have no idea what this stupid anime is about. You can't pay attention to a single frame. All you can think about is how his arm has crept up behind your shoulders. A few inches more and he'll be holding you. Does he... want to hold you? You lean toward him so slowly your spine creaks. One molecule at a time. After a thousand years, your head slides nervously under his chin. His arm comes down, locking you in, fingers clutching your sleeve in a death grip. Even that snobby little pinky. His head tucks down into you hair. A sharp collarbone bites into your cheek. His heartbeat is hard, fast, and irregular. There's not a scrap of fat on him, and as you wrap your arm around his stomach, you think you see a twitch in his pants. Is that just you being desperate? Or... hopeful? This is really happening. --- Soon, you learn that Tenko is a clumsy kisser. It doesn't matter; the fact that he's kissing you at all is good enough for now. His lips are dry, but not half as dry as you expected. There's a slick of menthol helping things along; he's been using something medicated on his lips. Plus, his mouth tastes like he drank a gallon of mouthwash.

All this thrills you more than a little, because it means he came here wanting to impress you. Wanting you. Full stop. Underneath that minty sting is a strange, worrisome aftertaste, like something rotten. Your brain fires off an alarm. Stop kissing him. Right now. This thing will make you sick. But his hands nervously slide over your body... and you decide not to worry about it. Instead, you kiss him deeper. He makes a sweet, startled little noise. Your brain is a fucking liar. It occurs to you he's probably never done this before.

When you lace your fingers in his and try to pull one of his gloves off, he rips his hand away.

Don't. That’s the only explanation he gives.

No need to ask if it's a quirk thing or a trauma thing. Judging by how jittery he gets, it's probably both. You remember the way his hands almost float over objects without ever holding them. Maybe his touch is dangerous. Maybe that's why his face looks like that.

Maybe you should learn more about him before things go way too far...

No. It can't be that bad. Now that he's in your arms, everything frightening about him evaporates. He's vulnerable. He's alone. He's shaking a little. Has anyone else ever seen this side of him? You want to keep him all to yourself, just like this.

So what if he has to touch you with gloves on? You've heard of worse quirk-related inconveniences.

It's okay, Tenko. Do you want to keep going?

You put his hands back on you and wait for him to kiss you again. It doesn't take long.

---

You open his pants. He's long and thin, calloused even here. Every part of him feels untouched, unloved. You hold him tight and squeeze.

It doesn't seem to occur to him to please you in return. He looks afraid. Confused. You're sure you scared him earlier with the glove thing. Is this too much? No. He gasps and leans into you. The tiniest, broken please.

He cums in your hand right away, face buried in your shoulder, his eyes wet and hidden.

I have to go, he says. Over and over and over.

It's okay, Tenko.

You know he doesn't want to.

- - - - - (oops I wrote more)

#Shigaraki #Shigaraki Tomura #Shimura Tenko #Shigaraki x reader #Shigaraki x you #Shigaraki x y/n #gender neutral reader #shigaraki headcanons #mha #bnha #fred writes

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project-paranoia · 3 years

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Live Watch: S.C.I. Mystery Episode One

I enjoy camp because I've always enjoyed analysis and examination. I enjoy looking at something from all sides, testing it with my fingertips. When I was a child I would sit for hours just looking at something until I had it all held in my mind and I felt like I understood it. Camp necessitates that understanding the way that imitation and - good - parody requires it. To quote Susan Sontag - who articulated what camp is so well - Camp is "a sensibility that revels in artifice, stylisation, theatricalisation, irony, playfulness, and exaggeration rather than content." Because of this camp takes on head to head gender, sexuality, expectations, any sort of defined norm and sequins it up then shakes it down until understanding comes out. When understanding something there are three major ways to work your investigation - what it is, what it's imitation is - the close but not quite, and what it isn't. Camp handles all three, to quote again: "Camp sees everything in quotation marks. It's not a lamp, but a 'lamp; not a woman, but a 'woman.'"

Why are we talking about camp? Because SCI Mystery is some of the best kind of camp outside of drag or screaming about wire hangers. It deals a lot with mental illness in a way that would destroy a serious show, but in this one "mental illness" is a metaphor for being marginalised and a way to talk about the mouse and cat in the room. This show is about being queer. About being gay loudly and quietly, about resisting specific labels and needing them, about the threat of a cure and the blessing of acceptance. All the messy realities of queer life as varied as queer people. Like Lil Nas X's Montero, you can appreciate the effort without being comfortable with it. While the show's allegory of mental illness when many queer people are still told they are ill is done well and there is reason to the choices and tone, things are said which can be hard to hear. Knowing they're there because they're hard to hear and have been heard doesn't help everyone.

With all that said, it's also a fun, silly bl drama. Don't let the analysis scare you off. While the information about camp can be something to be aware of, all this show requires to be enjoyed is a willingness to be amused and spooked in turns.

You know the drill, spoilers below!

* I have memorised the youku sound, I have a triggered response with it. Not all triggers are bad, this one reminds me of Guardian

* Welcome to episode one where we just leap in! But don't worry, one of them has a cute earring and they are colour coordinated.

* Watching from youtube the episode is 38 minutes long while most of the others are 45. Attach whatever emotion you want to that fact.

* The exposition is handily delivered by asking a question which tells us some things, thank you show, I appreciate it

* First episode and he's already giving his partner an in case I don't come back letter to be opened if he dies

* Wait for me!~ Go!~~

* Slow walk with dramatic music: 1 (don't make this a drinking game You Will Expire) this time with bonus almost looking back

* I've seen a similar shot on Hawaii Five O

* Don't explain what's happening, just knock everything over with a jump kick in some absolutely spotless white tennies

* Running with dramatic music with bonus looking back: Does it count? We have yet to hear back from the judges

* They leap into the water with an explosion behind them, we are less than 2 minutes in and I love that for them

* At first I thought the boats were making a big heart before I remembered that I am very silly and they are not doing that

* This one is going to be long

* I can see his pockets through his trousers, why are his trousers so thin?

* It's not kissing to dramatic music in the surf if it's CPR

* Each story line has its own intro and that's very sexy of them

* Slow walk/dramatic music: 2-6

* These people are totally goofy and and yet the Seriousness

* Two Weeks Ago!

* The police school bus has arrived to shoo away the crows circling around Dr. Zhan staring (dramatically) at the body

* Sport scar policeman dresses even more unprofessionally than Zhao Yunlan who at least looks like a detective who was jumped by so many criminals he just gave up wearing a suit and went for jeans. Chief Bai's clothes are so thin, I'm under constant anxiety someone is going to tear them off.

* Also several of the cast pictures on MyDramaList look like the pictures your auntie insists taking to send to your other aunties and I love that for them

* Triple axil spin from the victim, the judges are loving it - this is the camp I'm here for

* The dramatic slo mo and music budget for this show was so big, just as it should be

* He's mad because he's angy

* Master Psychiatrist can tell all about the killer from crouching by the body, it's a trope and this is one of the few places I like it because it serves the show instead of the show serving it

* When you're almost boyfriend is going away for reasons and it's not your decision but you can't go with him because of your job so you're just low key bitter about it

* "You can't control me"

* The pettiness between these two

* Professional women who worked hard to get where they are still are constantly obsessed with boys according to most cdramas

*The male posturing in those three second has accidentally circled back around to being gay in the way those bro shows accidentally do and I love that

* I live for this 80s-90s police chief perm

* The Pettiness

* I always tend to like doctor characters, I don't know why. Even when they aren't my favourites I like them.

* She's kind of adorable, I like her (I've seen a lot of this show and every time I say I like someone it ends badly ;-; )

* "the victems"

* If you love Creative English, this is the show for you!

* Chief Bai's crew is trying so hard to get them back together

* Dr. Zhan is so good at psychology he can tell what someone looks like from some tire tracks - this trope is used all the time in crime shows, but they push it a little farther in SCI and it really helps the viewer know what the rules for the show are

* The scene in the psychiatrist's office hearkens back to queer coded villains and the way they're treated in old black and white horror cinema - but done so artfully it's almost invisible. It's incredibly well done, and the awareness of tropes and types all throughout the series is tremendously successful as much as it's campy fun.

* There's also the trope of someone who manipulates someone into feeling like they've been "purified" and then weaponises them against the "filthy". And of course the fact that the killer's blade is a mirror - that he's killing in others what he sees in himself. This trope hasn't just been queer-coded but has been applied to any sort of physical or mental disorder. Thesis have been written about this trope and the anxiety attached to it. I can't write them better and this is long enough, it's just a small part of the excellent handling of the themes showing up in this genre and I wanted to point it out because it deserves appreciation for the skill and knowledge in the writing.

* The whole you need evidence vs you're saying psychoanalysis isn't trustworthy feels very much like a coded angry exes discussion

* I love the establishing shots, so good

* He kind of deserved that door to the face, what was he even doing

* Police violence in crime shows is supposed to be a release for the viewer, but many countries have issues with police violence so it hits wrong. Here it's far more performative in a way that at least has some awareness

* The weirdest phone call, you call someone to tell them something important and they say two things to you and hang up

* The tongue thing, why always the tongue thing?

* When a serial killer tries to compliment you by calling you a carnivore and you shut down the whole alpha male supposition by calling yourself a vegetarian

* At this point I've written almost fifteen hundred words and taken almost two hours to watch 23 minutes

* This is my life, these are my choices

* Dutch Angles

* You could make this conversation about being gay, I have had this conversation about homosexuality before

* Unfortunately while I had it I was on the bus trapped in a window seat

* The conversation didn't end with me saying something cool and everyone clapping

* They just got off the bus to go to work

* The banality of evil, yo

* Her shorts are Incredibly Short, good for her

* "arrest the perp behind my back" that's his job, broheim

* He doesn't ask why she checked behind their ears

* DUN dun dun!

* Slo mo file drop, and of course the file is blood stained and aged

* Chalk Art of Doom

* Chinese word play!

* Caught almost putting his coat over his crush, embarrassing XD

* Backstory!

* I love all the little character details, I could quote lines I think are funny all day but that would start getting silly

* Bai Yu Tong is marked as clean and having OCD but we don't see what's apparently a huge character trait at all other than the all white, do love that he's good at cooking

* Dr. Zhan: Brilliant! Genius! Cannot feed himself.

* Dr. Gong has indifference level 100% which is true and also I love that for him

* I love that Wang Shao part of the team because he's good at making friends, I love that for him

* Poor Zhao Fu: scared of ghosts and dumb and sweet? At least he has an 8 pack

* Jiang Lin is very tropey except the mention of her nearsightedness

* Ma Han's height 1.7m and legs 1.8m is hilarious and I love it

* I stopped recording the slo mo walks, but if you were drinking along with them you might be dead so I really appreciate you taking time out of your afterlife to continue reading. We appreciate all our ghost readers

* And that's the first episode! Thanks for making it to the end!

#SCI Mystery #SCI谜案集 #watchthrough #let's watch

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22drunkb · 3 years

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Please tell me about the Tim Curry phenomenon?

Hoist on my own petard! Okay.

So just in case what I said was unclear, when I said “Tim Curry as a phenomenon” I didn’t mean that there was some Thing That Happened, like [rummages in ancient tumblr lore] mishapocalypse or something. I just mean what Tim Curry has come to signify in popular culture for certain kinds and generations of people. I would not consider myself a Tim Curry expert, I don’t know a ton about his life and filmography, but I do experience him as that kind of icon or signifier, so all I’m going to be talking about is that (and for this reason I have determined I am not going to look anything up). (@tafadhali I’m going to need to you let me know how I did when this is all over.) So:

Tim Curry is an actor. He is probably best known for The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Clue, Muppet Treasure Island, Home Alone 2, the 90s miniseries of It, and maybe now that one clip of him that circulates online from time to time where he’s yelling about going to space and trying not to laugh. The key facts are:

Tim Curry has incredible presence and charisma. He is not an actor who “disappears into the role.” He is a very skilled performer--it’s not like he plays the same thing in every role, and if somebody else could do what he does, many more people would be doing it--but he’s the kind of actor who gets used as a shorthand to describe characters, or other actors. “A Tim Curry type.” He works in Muppet Treasure Island because he’s in no way naturalistic, and so he can play off puppets no problem. We could comparatively describe this as The Jack Black Factor.

Tim Curry has a very distinctive voice (speaking and singing) and way of delivering lines, such that his accent comes off as almost put-on or parodic without ever quite going over the top. (This is true when he’s actually putting on an accent and when he’s not.) His delivery has unusual emphases that make the lines stick with you. These qualities are equally suited to comedy and creepiness, and he reasonably often does both at the same time. So he easily becomes a kind of factory for references, a meme factory before we called things memes. We could comparatively describe this as The Christopher Walken Factor.

Tim Curry has been in a lot of movies. These movies’ quality ranges from “hilariously bad” to “not good by mainstream standards, but objectively incredible at being the kind of movie it is” to “beloved hit, but nobody would call it High Cinema.” (If Tim Curry has also been in prestige films recognized as such,* I do not disrespect them or him, but I don’t know about it! And that’s part of the Tim Curry phenomenon!) I have not come up with a comparison for this--it’s less a distinctive thing than something that becomes important in combination with the first two.

Tim Curry always does an incredible job in these movies, whatever their quality. And he always seems to be having a great time doing it. One of the top YouTube comments on that clip I linked reads, “A reviewer once said about Tim Curry: ‘For every 1-star movie he's been in, he's the reason that movie got that star.’” He delivers a specific feeling of intense talent being directed, with great pleasure, to a purpose that is, on some level, inexplicable. (No one else would say this line this way! Why is he doing that! Because he’s Tim Curry, and that’s good enough, dammit!) This creates a sensation that somehow combines “admiration” and “this is hilarious,” but in a different way than you might admire a great stand-up set. It’s on purpose without feeling deliberate. It’s cheese being executed at the level of high art. It’s ridiculous and it’s fantastic. IT’S CAMP, BABY. Put that together with the ability to walk a knife-edge between hilarious clown and scary villain (he played Pennywise, hello), in the context of what the film industry outside of Very Special Episode morality tales has been for most of his career, and you have a recipe for a queer culture icon. I give you Frank-N-Furter.

So Tim Curry at this point means a certain quality or texture of zaniness--but one that’s not maniacal or exactly cartoonish, just like, orthogonal to what’s expected or normal. You get Tim Curry for a role when you want things to feel a little too much but in the best way; when you want to sit right on the line between “this character is out of sync with reality” and “telling the audience this is a heightened reality.” This is assuming you’re a good filmmaker who knows what you’re doing. He is the best thing in some bad movies because he reliably creates this delightful sensation even when the movie doesn’t have a clear purpose for it; he can make objectively bad material fun to watch because the things that made the writing dumb or the costuming bad are campy and fun in his hands. This is kind of what I meant by an inexplicable purpose: it doesn’t need to make sense to work. This is also what I mean about being on the line between “is the character acting nuts or is this the kind of world the movie is setting up”--when it’s not what the movie is trying to do, but the movie is failing at what it is trying to do, Tim Curry suddenly makes that fun to watch because whatever he’s doing is both of quality and basically ineffable.

So this is why we live in a world where, say, Justin McElroy can build a whole bit on MBMaM around just repeatedly spitting out the words “CHEESE! PIZZA!” in a Tim Curry voice, or Tim Curry appears on The Simpsons. At this point Tim Curry is not just a man or an actor, he’s a mood. And because that mood is hard to describe, we mostly only invoke it by referring to him. But it’s a wonderful thing that has a lot of room in it to be enjoyed in different ways, whether it’s about queerness or comedy or surrealism or performance craft that isn’t smothered by the uptight standards of “naturalism” or “realism” or “subtlety.” And Clue is one of the best venues for it because it is a good movie made by people who did know what they were doing, and what they were doing was aimed exactly at creating the Tim Curry Experience: it’s clever and artful at being campy and cheesy, and its darkness and funniness are wrapped together in so many layers you can’t separate them.

BONUS:

Evidence of Tim Curry’s skill as a performer: look at him Not Being Tim Curry on SNL here with Eddie Murphy, maybe the one time I can think of that he’s in the “straight man” role. (An FYI more than a warning: The sketch is poking at racism--I think it holds up really well, but it’s deliberately pushing ~the line.)

__________________________________ *I know a lot of Film People etc. now consider Clue a genuine genius classic--for good reason! it’s incredible!--but it wasn’t received that way, and to the extent that it has gained this recognition it’s by that rubric of “succeeds at what it’s trying to do, which is more important than whether what it’s trying to do is be Citizen Kane Paddington 2.”

#the tim curry phenomenon #anonymous

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bthump · 3 years

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What do you think about the point in the story we are at now? Would you say you like the direction Miura is going in or not? What are the things you dislike about Berserk as it is now?

lol this is hard to answer because it’s so heavily dependent on what happens next. I think we’re at a point where everything could start coming together in a way that really appeals to me or where everything could just fall apart and I’ll have to accept that this is no longer a story I’m particularly interested in.

Though I am slightly leaning towards the former right now, whether that’s based on real evidence or mostly blind optimism I’m not entirely sure lol.

Basically I think it’ll depend on a) whether Moonlight Boy becomes a major motivational plot point or turns out to be more of a red herring or brief inciting factor in the shift to a new arc, and b) whether Guts and the rpg group overcome the imminent challenge they’ll face thanks to their personal growth and friendship or whether it’ll fuck them up.

But the reasons I’m feeling tentatively optimistic right now are:

all the foreshadowing re Guts losing himself to the armour and wreaking some havok, which has to happen at some point lbr

fetus as the focal point of Casca’s traumatic memories and symbolizing her thorn-covered heart, which to me screams sacrifice material, which would be the only thing that could make it time sharing Griffith’s body interesting to me (ie what happens to Griffith if it’s sacrificed?)

I’m gonna link this post because I’m still mostly feeling the basics of this theory, ie Skull Knight and Elfhelm in cahoots plotting to use the behelit to entrap the godhand, at Guts and Casca’s expense. Plus another possible way for Moonlight Boy to come to nothing is if it’s a manipulation of Danann’s.

I think Guts is purposefully being written as emotionally distanced from the rpg group, which is a good sign for the power of friendship not saving him yet, and there are also aspects of Guts+rpg group that parallel Griffith+Hawks in the golden age (eg Farnese’s feelings for Guts being paralleled to Casca’s feelings for Griffith, Guts gaining followers who compare him to fire, etc) which also gives me hope that tragedy will strike.

Miura’s little bait and switch wrt Guts and Casca’s relationship that honestly felt like gentle mockery of people who wanted them to immediately get together lol. Yk Casca getting sent out in a pretty dress to meet Guts complete with romantic double page spread and having a breakdown, then changing into pants and cutting her hair and saying how much better it is, and not being able to look at Guts now.

Also more recently, Guts at a loss now that he’s brought Casca’s sanity back and it didn’t actually solve any of his issues. “The hell do I do now?” “You have reached the end of your journey. It is not always a happy thing.” I’ve been worried for a while that Guts’ complex issues have been dropped and we’re meant to see him taking Casca to Elfhelm as him genuinely growing past them, and that one moment was such a huge relief when I read it lol. It really suggests to me that this sidequest was always about Guts trying to find a distraction to avoid dealing with his actual issues (fear/trauma, insecurity, love/hate feelings for Griffith, regret, etc), and those are going to make a return sooner rather than later.

Miura implying in interviews that we’re not all that close to the end, so there’ll probably be at least one more arc after Elfhelm, which gives me more hope that this whole rpg arc will lead to some amount of narrative-shaking tragedy and we’ll get some interesting stuff after.

this parallel with the climax of the Millenium Falcon arc and my firm belief that it has to come full circle.

other stuff like complex apostle characters, the lost chapter worldbuilding, schierke suggesting that her elemental guardians are holy see angels alongside implications that holy see angels are the godhand. Basically my hopes for worldbuilding that doesn’t boil down to good spirit world vs evil spirit world.

all the little suggestions that NGriff isn’t as emotionless as he’d like to be that have nothing to do with a demon fetus giving a shit about its parents

So I guess my answer is that I do like the direction I hope Miura’s going in, but there’s also enough counter evidence that I may be wrong about that direction.

So some of the things I dislike about Berserk now are:

Moonlight Boy and the Fear that he will derail everything and the plot will soon revolve around, idk, Guts and Casca trying to free their kid’s soul bringing them closer together or some awful shit like that.

Moonlight Boy and the Fear that Miura is actually going to ignore the absolutely incredible foundation he wrote in the Golden Age to support the hints of Griffith’s current capacity for emotion in favour of pinning it all on a magic baby.

I have some lowkey fears that Guts “bleeding” for Casca is gonna be a thing, largely based on me recently re-reading the scene where Farnese gets upset about everything Guts has done for her while bathing her. Like yk, maybe Casca will remember Guts saving her and warm up to him... tho in all honesty I can’t actually think of an example of Guts being the one to save her post-Eclipse lmao, he fucks it up every time. Maybe when he first put on the armour and killed an apostle in front of her or w/e, yk. Some shit like that. Like I can come up with 50 counter arguments but those only work if you accept the basic premise that Berserk will be good, yk?

The fear that we are meant to understand that Guts has overcome most of his flaws throughout the Millenium Falcon/Fantasia arcs and will get a big moment to demonstrate that and overcome the armour or save Casca or whatever.

And less speculatively and more generally, like many people I’m not a fan of the current art style, I think the larger cast on Guts’ side is causing some poor writing and not helping the pacing issues (and tbh I think Berserk is paced fairly well up until the boat stuff), I don’t like the lighter more comedic tone right now bc I got into Berserk for the grimdark vibe and tragedy and characters succumbing to their fatal flaws and making huge mistakes and I miss that a lot. I’m not saying Berserk can’t be light and funny and campy but I prefer that Black Swordsman or Conviction Arc style where it’s offset by a lot of fucked up shit, or Golden Age style where there’s an underlying sense of dread bc we already know shit’s going to go wrong, yk? If shit does get dark soon I might end up being a lot less critical of the current tone on re-read tbf.

So basically to sum up:

hopes: tragedy, character flaws that haven’t been dealt with yet coming home to roost, Moonlight Boy becomes a non-issue.

fears: power of friendship staves off tragedy, slower gtsca romance, moonbaby affects plot and emotions, guts’ flaws get brushed under the rug instead of fucking him over

I can argue that the former makes a lot more sense than the latter, but I’ve been burned a lot in my life and I know a lot of fans would argue the latter makes more sense than the former so yk, everyone has their biases including me and idk how blinded I am by those biases lol.

Anyway ty for asking!

#Anonymous #a #ask #theme: speculation #theme: critique #arc: f #theme: opinion

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blitzturtles · 3 years

Text

Title: The Shadow

Rating: Teen and Up

Fandom: JoJo's Bizarre Adventure: Vento Aureo

Pairing(s): BruAbba

Summary: There's looming. Something that towers far above what he could ever hope to reach the top of or outrun. It's shadow casts beyond him. Far into the future, reminding him that, no matter what he does, no matter how hard he tries, his mistakes have already been made. He's already cost a good man his life, and he's hurt many more.

Notes: Past alcohol abuse, depressive episode, probably some PTSD.

Abbacchio stares at his hands, clasped loosely together in his lap with one thumb absently stroking the other. He isn't actually looking at them. At the outlines of the calloused, scarred skin that, despite his best efforts, has seen better days. They don't register as anything more than a vague outline of light against his dark pants. Somewhere, beyond him, there is a crushing feeling creeping upward. Rising until it threatens to wrap itself fully around his being, but he can't bring himself to acknowledge it, much less care that it's there.

The tear tracks on his face have long since dried. There isn't anything left in his system. He's likely dehydrated, but he doesn't care about that either. Doesn't care about the ruined make up or the fact that he's supposed to be somewhere or-- anything. He doesn't care about anything.

There's a persistent numbness, save for the burning on the surface of his eyes, and not a single thing matters.

Except that isn't true. There's looming. Something that towers far above what he could ever hope to reach the top of or outrun. It's shadow casts beyond him. Far into the future, reminding him that, no matter what he does, no matter how hard he tries, his mistakes have already been made. He's already cost a good man his life, and he's hurt many more.

"Shit," Abbacchio breathes, voice desperate and shaking. Not again. No, no, no. But it's too late. He's sucking in air like he's never known it, choking it out just as quickly. His chest tightens until his ribs feel like they're breaking; the gnarled scar on his right side feels like it's being ripped open.

A hand, there's a hand- it's reaching in. He's going to die. He's-

"Leone."

Abbacchio blinks at the name. His name. His eyes are blurry, and he blinks a few more times in a rapid attempt to clear the newest round of tears (how there's anything left is beyond him). Before him is an all too familiar man with all too familiar blue eyes full of all too familiar concern.

Bruno remains crouched in front of him, patiently waiting like he always does. His hands hold each of Abbacchio's, but it's the limit of the contact he pushes for while he tries to carefully break through the static of anxiety and panic and unending nothingness.

Abbacchio doesn't even know when Bruno got there. Hadn't felt him grab his hands. Hadn't heard him come into the bedroom. Bruno's supposed to be away for the next two days on some sort of diplomatic bullshit, which is fine. Abbacchio's an adult. He can handle Bruno being away. It's already been two days; what's two more?

Time warps around them. Passing too slow and too fast. His breathing eventually calms to something more productive, though his chest is on fire. The pain will last for days, and that might be some kind of reminder for the future, if Abbacchio were one to learn from his mistakes.

"None of that," Bruno says gently, reaching up to wipe at the tears that begin to build again. He swipes his thumb under each eye carefully before reaching up to tangle his fingers in Abbacchio's hair. He tugs him down enough to press their foreheads together. "You think of yourself as such a monster, yet the only one you're monstrous to is yourself."

Abbacchio chokes on his next breath; something between a laugh and a sob escapes before he can stop it. Bruno's laugh is clearer. Soft enough that it would be easy to miss if they weren't so close together, but it lightens something in Abbacchio for the moment that it lasts.

"Do you want me to cry?"

"Not particularly," Bruno pulls back, but only to press a kiss to Abbacchio's nose, "But, if you need to, then it's alright if you do."

"No," the shadow is shifting. Becoming shorter and shorter as the light begins to filter in. Abbacchio feels a warmth start to settle in his skin that makes it easier for him to take slower, deeper breaths. To fight back against the worst of what his mind has to offer. "I think I'm done." He still doesn't feel great, but he wants to feel better. Wants to get over whatever it is that put him in this state in the first place. He honestly can't remember. Might have woken up that way. Depression is a bitch like that, and he isn't very good at handling it when the swings come full force. There's a reason he's prone to dampening the worst with alcohol. Or he used to be.

Bruno leans in to kiss Abbacchio again, this time on the lips. A short, simple thing that leaves Abbacchio feeling comparatively light. No matter how long they've been together, affection from Bruno still settles the chaotic, nightmarish energy inside of him. Maybe not fully, and maybe not right away, but it's a balm on his soul that he'll never turn down.

"How does a movie sound?"

"Distracting," Abbacchio answers after a moment. He doesn't want to move yet, but he knows that Bruno won't go far. Not for long. They can set up something on a laptop. Probably something dated and possibly campy.

"Perfect. Let me get my computer. Might change, too. Anything I can get for you?"

"No," Abbacchio barely resists the urge to add, 'just hurry up', because, while it would fit his usual level of gruffness, he refuses to be that clingy.

Bruno laughs again, like he knows anyways, and he probably does. Abbacchio's an open book to him. Easily read with all the ins and outs already figured out. There's not a plot point that Bruno hasn't been prepared for.

"Five minutes," Bruno promises him. He squeezes his hands a final time and moves to get to his feet.

Abbacchio absently places a hand on Bruno's thigh, steadying him on habit. It's not necessary, but the contact is nice. Furthers the calm settling inside, though the numbness persists. He watches Bruno go, exiting through one of his zippers. The teeth pop out of existence shortly behind their owner, and there's a moment of fleeting panic that Abbacchio has to stamp down.

Instead, he busies himself with finding something to watch with the promise of a much better evening to be had.

#bruabba #bruno bucciarati #bruno buccellati #leone abbacchio #vento aureo #jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #jjba part 5 #golden wind #blitzwrites #blitz

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phantomato · 3 years

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As a Voldemort fan, what do you think about the "Voldemort is my past, present, and future" line? Do you like it? Agree with it? I'd love to know!

So, I don’t normally think about specific lines of dialogue, and I took some time to do so before responding to this. Thanks for your patience!!

Reading within the context of canon

There are a couple of factors I want to keep in mind about this piece of dialogue:

It’s delivered by Diary Horcrux

It’s said as part of a villain monologue/identity reveal

I don’t bring these up to discredit the sentiment. It’s just that, in the realm of the books, we get relatively little direct interaction with either Tom Riddle or Voldemort, don’t we? Most of what we get is mediated through someone else’s memory or is a soul shard operating on its own (diary, locket, Harry mind-meld). Diary is the most coherent horcrux by far, which you can headcanon to be true for any number of reasons. I suppose he’s a useful lens into some part of Voldemort, but I am not sure I view him as a true snapshot of V at 16, more like a mix of V’s ambitions for himself, his mental/emotional state around that time, and whatever it means to be part of a soul stuck in an object for 50 years. And I don’t mean to imply that Diary has been sentient and awake and trapped, necessarily—maybe he’s dormant unless someone interacts with him, idk—but he is clearly disconnected from time, relying on the people who write to him to inform him about current events.

I suppose I’d say that the line sounds like the kind of bluster that an overconfident teenager might say, mixed with the sort of moral certainty that comes from flattening a person into a shade of themself. Adult Voldemort is more clever, and his dialogue, even when campy, has a subtlety to it in that he sounds like he’s saying things to amuse himself. Half of his conversations post-resurrection sound as though he’s not talking to anyone else in the room, and maybe that’s the cauldron-body Second Coming thing messing with his mind, but mostly I think of him as… intelligent and bored. Around someone who kept up with his pace of conversation, he wouldn’t need to be so distracted, because the other person would keep him engaged.

And, well, Diary is demonstrating the early stages of developing that skill, but he’s stuck with the mind of a 16-year-old and never gets to progress to the levels of genius that adult Voldemort reached. He thinks it’s funny (and frustrating) that this stupid child hero needs the whole “I am Lord Voldemort” thing spelled out so clearly, but Harry is… not the cleverest 12-year-old, and really, Diary, your monologue isn’t all it seems to be for all that Harry is amazed by it.

So, onto the sentiment.

Past

Personally, I much prefer a Voldemort who sees an intentional break between his childhood as Tom Riddle and his adulthood as Voldemort. I don‘t mind an acknowledgment that the potential was always there, or for him to believe that Voldemort was inevitable, but I like the agency of Voldemort deciding to live with this identity and deciding that this identity should not have ties back to Tom Riddle, or that he should get to control those ties and when they are invoked. But I’m also comfortable with the idea that he might have taken some time to reach that point, that at 16, beginning to question who he is, he might have been more comfortable erasing anything other than the Voldemort identity, especially as he was forced to perform Tom Riddle every day.

Future

I just like more fluidity to my Voldemort than this unyielding quote provides. What defines him above nearly all else, for me, is his desire to survive—and I will usually settle on the idea that if survival means preserving the identity of Tom Riddle for possible use (as in Made of Clay), then I think Voldemort would consider it as an option. This is all to say that Voldemort might ideally be his future, but… I think he’d consider Tom again if the choice was death as Voldemort or life as Tom.

Present

I’m working on a first-war Voldemort piece right now; the first chapter should go up late this week. I love Voldemort. I think he’s a fantastic character, with his own wonderful challenges both related to but separable from the idea of a middle-aged Tom Riddle. A Voldemort who has chosen to become V, to abandon the birth name and shed connections to people who knew him as such, redefining those relationships as something new, is compelling to me. There’s a particular attempt to sever himself from humanity that I think only exists when he has gone fully into being Lord Voldemort, and how humanity sneaks back into even that identity is a fundamentally interesting question. I don’t think 16-year-old Tom was presently Voldemort, though. I don’t think he truly becomes Voldemort until much later in life, and I’d bet he prefers not to relive the almost… naive joy that his teenage self took in claiming that name, given everything he must go through before he can truly live as it. He wouldn’t want to be that boy again. Mid-40s Voldemort is very happy that teenage Tom’s version of Voldemort is not his present.

#ask #voldemort

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sanstropfremir · 3 years

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Okay, time for my weekly rant so buckle up. The vocal stages were okay-I cant really remember them well because I watched them only once so take what I say with a grain of salt. Well I watched the Spark one once and I only got through half of the other one because I can’t stand ballads especially when there’s no interesting movement on stage to keep me engaged. Like it’s no fault of the members themselves or the song (I actually think their singing was incredibly beautiful and Eunkwang always sings like his wife just left him with the kids which is how you know he’s good) but I physically could not pay attention. That’s why I liked the spark stage a bit better-there was enough movement that I was able to focus on it. I really liked the use of the fire and the way they were walking in and out of the frame trading off parts so there weren’t too many awkward moments where the other members where on stage but not doing anything. The opening was gorgeous with each members being lit by the spotlight as they harmonize. So stagewise, I prefer Spark but vocally I think the other group was stronger. I love Spark and Taeyon is such an incredible vocalist (I mean the song is great because of her) so I don’t get why their delivery was, I don’t want to say weak, but subdued might be a better word. The only one that really stood out was Junhoe (but also that man couldn’t not stand out even if he tried, not with that incredibly rasp) and even he seemed to be holding himself back a bit. Though it was a bit slow it built up well to the two last choruses but still the first half could have been stronger. I know they were trying to draw it out to a strong pay off but I don’t really know if it was enough. And yes the suits were *chef’s kiss*. I think at this point in their career the FNC stylist has put SF9 in so many suits they’ve got it down to a science. Also I’m a sucker for those shirts with the triangle cut out and we got not one but two of them here.

Okay moving on, I’m not sure which group was next but I’ll talk about the Ikon stage. It seems like they finally realized that they’re on a performance based competition show so they decided to pull out the big guns. Love the little skit at the beginning (making sure people don’t forget that they’re YG), it was cute and refreshing. I really appreciated how they leaned into the campy acting in this stage (Stray kids did it too-just adding to the similarities between their stages). The song was meh but I also don’t really like BP especially not their recent stuff so it’s not a big deal. I would have preferred if they had gone with another song maybe Whistle or As If It’s Your Last or if they’d done a 2NE1 song like Chanwoo mentioned some point in the episode. I also think the stage would have been way smoother if they’d let Ikon and Lisa interact. Like if the boys appeared in her set after her section and then they all moved back to the first jungle set and then the whole thing turns gold and they did a dramatic outfit change (but with better jackets because theirs look like they came out of Party City). I also get what you mean about the dancers outfits not being that great. I actually really liked the outfits of Lisa’s dancers in isolation but they didn’t match with her or the set so they threw me off a bit. At least with the ikon members they were going for a modern look so the dancers outfits didn’t look that strange in comparison. Do you think it would have been better if they were white? How would you have improved then? The best way I can describe this performance was that it was a stage, stuff happened, I enjoyed myself but I don’t plan to revisit it anytime soon. Oh and we also have to give points for them cursing on national television not once but twice (at this point Jinwan deserves to say fuck).

Now to Stray Kids. So I feel like I need to preface this with the fact that I am actually a stray kids fan (I won’t call myself a stay because I don’t associate with the fandom) and though I’ve been really critical of them and their stages tend to be my least favorite I still have a soft spot for them (I got into this show because of them after all). I loved, loved, loved the intro with Felix (and yes his biggest flaw is that he’s Australian but I forgive him for it) and the way it immediately transitions into the chorus of DDD-the abrupt transition does fit really well with the Deadpool theme and I guess it is the closest they’re going to get to the feeling of yeeting themselves into traffic like in the movie. Interesting choice to start with the chorus. Now that I’m rewatching it I do really wish they stuck with the comic theme. I think that’s my gripe with SKZ-they have a lot of good ideas but they move on too quickly from them. Just pick a handful of things and sprinkle them throughout instead of cycling through them at breakneck speed. Like okay they’re doing Deadpool and he’s a comic character so keep the comic styling (it would have been a good thing to put in the projection behind Seungmin’s scene), maybe in the subway they could have had some fight choreo so the guns coming in at Lee Knows part aren’t out of nowhere (also someone please tell me they were trying to recreate the meme with the cat and the knives, please I need to know). I absolutely agree that them having a goal or an antagonist would have really helped the story along. I mean they literally have a spoken intro so why couldn’t Felix just tell us who they were fighting (and I’m pretty sure in the movie Wade tells us he’s trying to kill Francis in that scene sooo). As always they put more focus on the rappers (please can we get less Changbin and more Seungmin, Jeongin, or Lee Know or at least give Felix more parts). Seungmin was the real mvp of this stage and he had the best outfit (I think it qualifies for Hanya’s best gay little outfit list). Personally I with they hadn’t gone with Gods Menu again. I’ve been hoping that they would perform My Pace (and maybe remix it with their B-side TA off their Go Live album) because that would be such a fun stage. Again, I enjoyed myself but I won’t revisit it anytime soon. At this point the only groups I actually look forward to are BTOB and SF9 (they’re doing fucking Move and I don’t know whether to be excited or terrified-there’s a clip of Taeyang covering Move from a variety show or interview and I think he does it really well so I know at least one of them can pull it off). Again thanks for creating space where I can info dump and I hope I said something of interest to you!

i think you wrote more than me!! i love this, im gonna put my response under a cut im not being super obnoxious on the dash.

i get that the mayfly stage would be not as visually stimulating for people and usually i would count myself in with that crowd because i love a good spectacle but i think because i watched the spark stage first and my colour perception is sometimes weird so when there's a lot of movement with very little colour variation my tiny pea brain loses track of whats happening really quickly. especially with red. so it was kind of difficult for me to pay attention to the spark stage in the second half. also i absolutely HATE watching people flub on stage because it brings up such visceral secondhand feelings that i couldn't even watch the stage when i started the full episode today.

i love a good suit but you know what i would also love: sf9 in more costume variations. tbh im just getting nitpicky about it because im a costume designer down to the core and i got trained by a designer who specialized in doing avant garde costuming so i tend to skew more towards wild than reserved. it looks like the move stage wont be be suits so ill take it, but oh man to do i want to see some really crazy stuff. which i know they'll never do because idols have to be pretty at all times or the fans get mad but oh i want it so badly.

do you mean how i would improve ikon's backup dancers outfits or lisa's? here why dont i do both. for lisa's dancers i would have just done away with that harness shape all together, its almost exclusively a military style. the jackets by themselves would have been fine but really what they should have done was put them in something that matched the gold but contrasted enough to give them shape. by having at least her dancers in all black on a gold stage there was a lot of "haha look at me do a duck walk because lets throw in some voguing for spice." they could have gone with a mesh bodysuit idea similar to what she was wearing or even just different colour coats. as for ikon's backup dancers, firstly pants. not black. or even a longer skirt. genuinely a part of the reason why i dont watch girl group content is because i HATE the hem length of the shorts they make everyone wear. words cannot describe how much i hate that cut. kpop is so obsessed with showing off women's bodies and especially their legs but they do it in the LEAST flattering way possible because it "can't be too risqué," just shoot me now. i hate it. i hate it so fucking much. yea yea everybody was on cocaine in the 80s whatever but at least they were all wearing french cut bodysuits so their legs looked fantastic. stop interrupting the lines!! anyways. pants so the only section of skin showing is thigh to mid calf, especially because they weren't even doing any fun legwork! if they really wanted to keep the full sleeve bodysuits they shout have done them in a fabric with a texture or external embellishments, like a patent/vinyl or sequins/rhinestones. something to catch the stage lights so we can actually see the shape of the limb. but the easiest way to fix it is literally just cut the arms off the bodysuits. stages are lit to show off skin, sometimes the best way to have something be seen is just to have it bare.

i agreed skz cycles through ideas way too fast, they need to just pick a couple and stick them out through the stage instead of just adding more and more different ones throughout. also ok good someone else noticed that there is just...so much changbin. we don't need that much changbin. i know there's other boys in the group let them do something! also im pretty sure theyre not recreating the cat knife meme but actually the promo image from john wick chapter two, which i also could have sworn i saw a deadpool version of as an instagram ad back when movies were happening, but now that im looking for it it doesn't exist so i might be crazy.

im excited for the move stage but im also trepidatious because...its move. i have NO clue what the concept is from the previews so i just hope its weird enough to take it enough out of the taemin context for me to enjoy it.

#kingdom #youre very sweet im glad you like sending asks in!!#realistically im just trying to replace going out to the pub and talking about art with people #this is my virtual pub you are welcome to a have a pint at my table!!#theres some costume talk in this one for anyone who reads the tags first #as you can see do not get me started on the shorts issue because it is one of the few things that gets me irrationally angry #i can ignore it most of the time by willfully not thinking about it #kpop questions #text #kingdom asks

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duhragonball · 3 years

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So, Terminator 3. T2 was such a huge hit that everyone just assumed a third movie was a given, but it took twelve years for it to finally happen. The Wikipedia article has a section about the delay, but it’s really long and complicated, and I’m not that interested anymore. The main takeaway is that James Cameron, who directed the first two movies, wasn’t involved in the making of T3. Apparently, he really wanted to do it in 1995, but by the time the rights and everything got squared away, he got busy doing Titanic and Avatar or whatever else, and he decided that he’d already told the story he wanted to tell in the first two movies. But he did tell Arnold Schwarzenegger to go for it if he got an offer.

I guess the reason I’m explaining all of this was because I always thought Cameron did make T3, and the reason Linda Hamilton wasn’t in it was because of hard feelings over their divorce in 1999. Which sounds kind of dumb now that I type it out. A fan would think that, because they see actors appearing or not appearing in movies as the ultimate sanction, but for them it’s strictly business. Arnold was in T3 because they paid him $30 million, not because he desperately wanted to play the character again. According to the Wikipedia article, Hamilton wasn’t in the movie because there just wasn’t much they could do with Sarah Connor in the story. Her role was to prepare John Connor for his own role. This movie features him as an adult, so there’s nothing more for her to do. Hamilton recognized this, and declined to participate.

I think T3 had a lot going against it, because it had so much to live up to, and fans of T2 had been waiting so long. I think everyone wanted the T3 movie James Cameron might have made in 1995, but what they got in 2003 was this movie, which didn’t quite live up to the hype. I’m not sure anything else could have lived up to the hype, though. T2 had some mighty big shoes to fill.

The big problem is that it’s basically the same plot structure as T2. Two more Terminators come from the future and they fight over the life of John Connor. After escaping the bad Terminator, John tries to stop Skynet from taking over and nuking humanity, and they end up having a final showdown with the bad Terminator along the way. It really is the same movie in a lot of ways, so it just begs to be compared to T2, which only magnifies its flaws.

The main difference is that John thought he already stopped Skynet years ago, so he’s horrified to learn that he only postponed the inevitable. He goes to a lot of trouble to try again, but the audience probably already anticipates that this won’t work. T2 was ambiguous about this, but T3 actually shows the nuclear missiles launching and destroying their targets. So it’s kind of a downer to watch. We even learn that Future John will die in 2032, because the good Terminator in this movie was the one who kills him, before he got reprogrammed to protect Present John.

The other difference is the addition of Kate Brewster, who’s fated to become John’s second-in-command and wife. The bad Terminator was actually sent to kill her and other would-be Resistance leaders, until it discovers John and changes priorities. Future Kate is also the one who sends the good Terminator back in time. I never fully understood Kate’s purpose in the movie, since she’s basically a spare John, but I think they needed a viewpoint character. In T1, Sarah was the viewpoint character, then it was John in T2. But in T3, Sarah’s dead and John already knows all about this stuff, so there needed to be a new character with a special destiny. The trouble is that I don’t think Kate gets a chance to digest this very well, probably because we’ve already covered this twice before already.

I think this is the movie where the time travel stuff really went off the rails. T1 was very consistent about establishing a predestination paradox. T2 hinted that the future could be changed, but never made it clear whether it actually changed or not. The value was in the attempt, not the result. But the T-850 tells John that “Judgement Day is inevitable”, and that he only postponed it from its original date in 1997. So they managed to change the future, just not enough. Fair, but how does the T-850 know this? Shouldn’t he be from the same altered future, where Judgement Day happened in 2003?

Also, this movie introduces more Terminator varieties. In the first movie, the T-800 is stated to be new in the future. Then in the second movie, the T-800 admits that the T-1000 is much more sophisticated, because it’s an “advanced prototype.” In this movie, the T-850 claims to be obsolete, and says the T-X is much more advanced. So it sounds like Skynet was busily inventing better Terminators for these missions, except it shouldn’t have had time for that. It lost the war and had to use the time machine as a last-ditch effort. It’s weird enough that it used the time machine three times, but it shouldn’t have had years to do this. The Human Resistance captured the time machine shortly after winning the war, right? I really hope T4 explains some of this.

Roger Ebert called this movie “Essentially one long chase and fight, punctuated by comic, campy or simplistic dialogue." The first 24 minutes are fairly dull, but once it gets rolling, it’s pretty fun to watch. But he’s right. When I watched all the DBZ movies in 2019, I realized that Movie 7 is just one big fight scene, with some slice of life stuff at the beginning to set things up. T3′s basically the same, with very little else to occupy its time. T1 had the relationship between Sarah and Kyle, and T2 had Sarah’s hangups and John’s bonding with “Uncle Bob”. T3 really only has Kate and John hanging on for dear life as their protector drags them through the story. It’s a fun chase, with lots of guns and explosions and breaking stuff, but there’s not much more to it.

So what’s good about this movie? What makes it really stand out? Well, for openers, the T-X is pretty cool. The T-1000 was going to be difficult to top, and I don’t think the T-X ever succeeded, but it wasn’t for lack of trying. She has liquid metal on top of an endoskeleton, so she can disguise herself, but she can’t seep under doors and stuff like that. Also, she has weapons built into her body, so she’s the only time traveler who could actually bring future weapons with her into the past. Also, she can control machines, like when she hijacks a bunch of police cars and fire trucks to help her chase down John. She’s ridiculously overpowered, and she does not give a fuck who knows it. The previous Terminators at least attempted to keep a low profile, revealing themselves only when ready to attack, but the T-X just wreaks havoc all over the place. She’s not worried about the authorities or a lack of firepower, or anything at all, so she’s free to execute her mission with reckless abandon.

Second, I take some solace in John Connors personal crisis in this movie. He was kind of chill about the whole thing in T2, because he got his mom back and he had a cool robot pal, and they seemed to have the whole Skynet problem figured out. In this movie, Sarah’s dead, and he doesn’t know what to do with himself. He can’t quite believe that Judgement Day won’t come, so he lives off the grid and tries to avoid everyone. He doesn’t want the Future War to happen, but at the same time, his life has no purpose without it. Later, he becomes despondent and says that he must not be the chosen one after all, because he’s no leader and he never was.

Except, he is, and he has to be, and he becomes one at the end of the movie, when he finally accepts his fate. There’s something very powerful about the shot of Kate holding his hand as he prepares to give orders to the other survivors on the radio. They’re stuck in this dark future now, and they have to see it through together.

I think, whenever I watched these movies before, that I never really “got” John Connor as a character. In T2 he was a kid, so I just wrote him off. He wasn’t John Connor yet, so it didn’t matter much. In T3, he seemed extremely pathetic, and I took his lack of confidence at face value. I thought he really wasn’t ready to lead, and he only ended up in that role by default. But this time around, I see how in T2 he was the moral center of the good guy team. Sarah was lashing out at everyone and the Terminator only cared about mission objectives, but John kept reminding everyone of the value of human life, and what they were all fighting for. Even as a kid, he got “it” in a way that others didn’t. In T3, he’s demoralized, but he still knows how to do this stuff, and how to lead. He just doesn’t feel motivated until the final act of the movie.

That didn’t stick with me when I first saw this movie in ‘03, but I’m older now, and less sure of myself than I used to be, and all the validation I get feels hollow and unconvincing. Like John, I may be aware that I have the capacity to do things, but it doesn’t always feel like it’s enough. That’s what T3 has that T2 doesn’t. It’s that crisis of confidence that separates the two films, although it’s subtle enough that it’s easy to overlook.

#mike watches the terminator

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charliemcarthy · 3 years

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hello!! so ive been following u for a while now (since 2014 or earlier i think? i have vague memories of danny phantom merfic) and ur the only person i follow who posts about nancy drew so i Have to ask bc my curiosity keeps piquing over the years. i love puzzle/detective games, where do u think i should start if i wanted to get into the nancy drew games? :]

80 Hello! What a juicy ask to answer over my morning coffee >)

I have answered a couple asks/posts over the years about starting the games:

This one as well as this ask can be quick places to start <3

I also highly recommend this post made by Nancy-Drew-Designs that I just rebagled. I love the way they've organized the games into this chart, it's very reliable, even when taking int account that each game's difficulty can be suggestive. It might be easier to use this when you've got a few games below your belt, though! None of the above posts contain spoilers <3 (None of the below do either!)

This gets VERY long and rambly here, and I don't even mention all the games >>; Sorry!

So TBH my tastes/suggestions haven't changed much in the 4 years since I was asked which games were the 'best.' I will still stick by Ghost of Thorton Hall, Shadow at the Water's Edge, Final Scene. I will also toss Ghost Dogs of Moon Lake, The Haunted Carousel, or Message in a Haunted Mansion into the ring. ...Charlie loves spooky stuff, can you tell XD DOG, CAR, and MHM are all older games, and despite their age they have stood up to time pretty well.

MHM is a shorter game but riddled with spooks and creeps around every corner. There's a particular scare on the foyer staircase that chills me to this day. Play this in the dark with headphones on!

DOG was baby Charlie's first game and so it will always be one of my reccs. It's got ghost puppos, spooky woods, cemeteries, and talks of old gangsters in the roaring 20's! What's not to love!

CAR is another shortish game, with somewhat simple puzzles. I love theme parks too, I grew up with my folks working the town carnival. There's something about an empty theme park that soothes/relaxes me, but I think it's liminal space for a lotta people. I also like it's secondary plot/message about grieving and loss, and it's one of my most replayed games simply for the gentleness of it. The music is just haunting, too~

The nice thing about ND games is there is, literally, something for everyone! And they, most of them anyway, maintain their theme's integrity or showcase good, honest research to whatever their niche subject is. Some games you have to suspend disbelief more than others, for example Secret of the Scarlet Hand is NOT osha safe, and that's all I'll say about that. (But omg, is it a cool as fuck game, and they did their due diligence with Mayan culture, even made baby!Charlie stop and question why it was okay for museums to just...take from other cultures even in the name of learning and preservation. Like, good for them, my mom loved that sm.)

If you love orcas or the ocean, or perhaps have fond memories of East Coast livin', you'd enjoy Danger on Deception Island, or maybe you'd like to head to the tropics, in which case, Creature of Kapu Cave might be a fun one.

The Legend of the Crystal Skull has lots of perils and unease, and since it's rooted in New Orleans that's no surprise.

If you like horses, or old western romances, perhaps the Secret at Shadow Ranch will tempt you first!

You also can't go wrong with The Secret of the Old Clock, which is a cute lil rewind and lovingly recreates the first Nancy Drew book while still keeping itself fresh and unique. Plus hey, mini golf!

And if you were an Ancient Egypt kid, like so many of us were, then Secret of the Lost Tomb will be right up your alley~

And of course, if you want to literally start from the ground up, simply check the wiki, and you can play them in order <3 (Though I will suggest playing the Remastered Secrets Can Kill in place of game 1. XD It's a lil more fleshed out, more polished etc.)

The newer games, in my opinion, are sort of where things start to...fall apart. I have played The Silent Spy, Labyrinth of Lies and didn't like them. I played Sea of Darkness and did enjoy it but...well, let's put put this way:

I've played those newer games past GTH once. More out of desperation and loyalty for the old studio, frankly. They are not high on my list of recommendations, but perhaps you will play them and find something more to love than I did, Anon.

I've replayed most of the above recommendations since 2002, almost ad nausea, all different levels. Some of my best memories are playing them over with my friends, watching the game new through their eyes. I've converted a few who snubbed point and clicks into ND addicts, having had them tell me, "well these games are different. Even the campy, old ones--they just are."

Now, quickly, difficulty can be relative. I personally think some of the 'harder' games are easier and vice versa, but the games thankfully all come with Amateur and Master Sleuth modes.

There really isn't a wrong answer, to be honest. (Except Midnight in Salem. Please don't start with that one.)

Certainly go with your gut, and dig into titles that pique your interest beyond the ones I've mentioned. And of course, come back and tell me what you think!

#answered #nd #nancy drew games #reccomendations #long post #i ramble im sorry ;~;#i just love these games sm

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urmomsstuntdouble · 3 years

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ooh, care to share your thoughts on some characters you like but don’t talk about ?

thanks for the ask! and yes i would care to share some of those thoughts

one character i really like is poland, but i dont like the way theyre treated a lot in canon or in fanon (also i hc them as using they/them pronouns). i think it would be easier for me to interact with poland the character if there was less..weirdness around them being so overtly queer, if that makes sense? i know a popular headcanon for poland is that they’re a trans man, but i actually dont really vibe with that. i mean have your headcanons if you want, you do you, but something about trans man poland makes me a bit uncomfy..like you take a guy who crossdresses and is generally super fem and campy and say ah yes he’s trans..idk its got weird vibes. like he’s a man but he’s not like the other men, who don’t crossdress and don’t talk like valley girls and all that. thats not to say i dont think poland is like cishet or whatever (nobody’s cishet on this blog ;)) theres just something about the fandom portrayal of them that irks me a lil. i also find them a bit of a difficult character because everyone seems to love the angst about like. points in time when poland didnt exist (russian empire days) and they’re portrayed as being so different than they were previously. i also think that poland as a character is one of the more contradictory ones (partially due to my own perception of poles, which is largely predicated on a certain type of immigrant grandmother), because they really are trying to be positive but shits hard when you’re a queer jew and the year is 1600- speaking of them being jewish, i do have a historical reason for that, and it’s the theory that jews had a big role in saving poland during the black plague. basically there were a lot of orthodox jews, and its a thing for orthodox jews to have 2+ sinks in their houses. iirc cleanliness is super important. anyway, there were a lot of orthodox jews in eastern europe at the time, much of which was controlled by the polish-lithuanian commonwealth, and that also happens to be one of the areas least affected by the plague. a ton of christians still died, although it was considerably less than in other areas. anyway i also have that hc because of the warsaw ghetto uprising in 1943, and because poland was one of the first countries hitler invaded. though poland today is v catholic (and it always was very catholic) it has a strong presence and one could say that poland is the cultural center of ashkenazi judaism. of course, during the russian empire and the holocaust, many polish jews were murdered or driven out, so there aren’t quite as many there today, but in the past, poland was something of a haven for jewish people in europe. anyway that was a tangent. but yeah, poland. theyre a very good character but i feel like they get misinterpreted a lot. i think they’re quite similar to italy veneziano in that way, because poland is definitely a very traumatized country- all the partitions, for one, and then the pat 2-300 years would have been very rough for someone who’s jewish. anyway i have more thoughts but ive distracted myself with the judaism thing, so yeah.

i also really like sweden, although i don’t know enough about them (sigh. my nonbinary headcanons. he/they sweden.) to do a real in depth historical analysis of their character. i think an underused piece of comedy about him is that sweden has been neutral in all military conflicts for the past 200 or so years (on paper. they were involved in the congo crisis in the 1960s and have recently stationed more troops in foregin countries). like..sweden used to be a powerhouse in northern europe and now he’s just. trying to be a dad or something idk. anyway my interest in sweden’s character is relatively new, so i would have to go seek out more sweden content, but i think they’re generally super interesting and im a bit sad to see their potential wasted by being like. finland’s husband/sealand’s dad. dont get me wrong i love some good sufin content but there’s more to his character than that he’s in love with finland.

i also think china’s pretty neat just because i love dads, and i also think he’s gorgeous. long haired men are hot, what can i say? i like him being a crotchety old man who’s a bit out of touch with the Youths tm, although i think he would be too powerful if he learned some modern slang and then decided to misuse it around his kids. i also want to look deeper into the fandom interpretation of his relationship with hong kong and taiwan, mostly because i havent before. there’s also this chinese restaurant that no longer exists that has been described as making the food so spicy that whatever went into the wok next would still be hot enough to make you cry. i feel like that’s a very yao thing to do- like come on, it’s not that spicy- meanwhile, he’s had thousands of years to develop an iron spice tolerance and something that’s spicy enough for him might kill a regular human. perhaps thats hyperbolic, perhaps not, idk. anyway i also do think that he’s the most human out of all the nations, just because he’s been alive so long. i might just be incredibly fascinated with immortality, idk. i think its fascinating the toll that would take on a person, mentally speaking. like all the nations are weird but china must be super weird. anyway i feel like my fascination with how old he is might be a lil weird, but also one of my favorite doctor who characters is ashildr, so i digress. anyway this post is getting super long so i think im gonna cut it off here. hope that was snazzy!

#sorry if any of this is historically inaccurate #i have more thoughts but maybe they merit their own posts #anywho #hetalia #hws #hws poland #hws sweden #hws china #holocaust mention #(because polish history)#nb poland #nb sweden #ceros posting

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nrth-wind-a · 3 years

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Aaaand that’s the last of these kiss prompts! One last one that I had @flamekeeperbellroc pick a kiss type for me because I need at least one where Skrael was givin Bells a kiss! Here is [Forehead] + some fluff to make up for the angst just now <3 --

“Bells? Are you alright?” Skrael gave a gentle knock on their door.

He didn’t mean to hover; he really didn’t. It was just…

“You’ve been listening to… ‘Mr. Brightside,’ on repeat for the last hour? It’s not-- a problem, per se, just--”

The sounds of The Killers turned less audible through the walls, and Skrael could hear shuffling inside their bedroom. As he was about to turn back to his own room, feeling horribly awkward, Bellroc’s door opened a fraction.

He whirled back to face them, quickly. As of now was his first actual sighting of them since the morning, when they’d grabbed their favorite 21 ounce mug, filled it near to the brim with barely-lighter-than-black coffee, and stalked back to their room without a word.

Standing in front of them now, he gave them a once-over, worry growing. He knew what they were working on-- it was the project all three of them had to turn in by the end of the semester-- and while it wasn’t quite that Skrael was unbothered by the assignment where they were, it was just… Bellroc had been having a bit of inspirational trouble.

The assignment had all three of them out of their comfort zones, to be entirely fair-- randomly assigning them a classic style prompt.

But Nari had been the luckiest of all three of them, getting “historical vintage - mid-60’s”; it was different from her modern designs, but it still fell rather squarely in her skill range. She adored making flowing silhouettes and using lighter colors than either Bellroc or Skrael favored, to bring out a more natural look on her models. The hippie movement of the era would support her concepts perfectly.

Skrael, on the other hand, who had managed to end up with “black tie,” wasn’t particularly struggling either, but he did have to consult the professor on more than one occasion about toning down the hints of alternative fashion that had slipped into more than one of his drafts.

Bellroc, however, had ended up with “sportswear.”

And it wasn’t that they despised sportswear clothes. They understood that the style served a function that was in high demand. They even held a certain respect for designers that could make their entire careers in sports fashion.

But it was also nearly the polar opposite of the formal, campy, vaguely punk designs that they wanted to make into their brand.

So it had been difficult.

Bellroc raised an eyebrow at Skrael’s sudden silence, and before he could try to remedy that, they turned to walk back into their room. They left the door open, though, so Skrael knew he was being invited in.

This was furthered when they mumbled, “shut the door behind you, please,” as they sat back down at their desk.

He complied, grateful for the excuse to do something, as he gathered his thoughts.

Skrael started with something easy, to breach the subject’s surface, but only just. “So... How’s the project going?”

They shot him an unappreciative look.

He winced. “That bad, huh?”

Bellroc exhaled through their nose. “Yes.” It sounded nearly physically painful for them to admit that.

Skrael softened, walking over to place one hand on the back of their chair, and the other on their desk, as he leaned over to get a look at what they’d been doing.

His brow furrowed. “Wait. I thought you said it wasn’t going well. These look great!”

They gave a frustrated groan. “They’re fine, I guess, but they feel… typical. Boring. There’s nothing about them that would stand out in a Nike store.”

Skrael hummed. “Well, I suppose that’s true. But do they have to stand out? Don’t you want them to look like they belong there?”

“Maybe if it wasn’t Overton. But you know how he is. He’ll dock points immediately for unoriginality.”

Skrael gave a quiet sigh. They were right.

“Hm. Okay. Well. Let’s brainstorm. Wanna bounce some ideas off me?” He asked.

Bellroc considered the idea, and Skrael gave them one more nudge, “I don’t mind.”

They looked at him skeptically. “You’re not busy, too?”

He shrugged. “Nah. Overton and I have another draft meeting tomorrow, so I’m at a good stopping point.”

“...If you’re sure.” They hummed.

“I am. Now. What do you have so far?” He asked, glancing down at the various pages scattered around their desk. “I see these, which I still think look great,” he gestured to the top page, “But how are the others?”

Bellroc gathered the pages into a stack and passed them off, “Here. Feel free to rifle. I’ve stared at these for way too long today, anyway.”

Skrael accepted the stack with a reassuring smile, before he flipped through them slowly, taking it all in.

“Hm… Okay. I like pages one, three, four, five, and seven; I think those are your strongest pairs so far. Have you considered trying shoe designs?”

Bellroc nodded, “Yeah, but I’m saving those for another day. I wanted to get the clothes done first.”

“Right. Well, the jacket on page three is really nice. I highly recommend making that one of the main statement pieces. The pants on page one are good, too, and… I mean, honestly, everything on pages four, five, and seven seems nice to me, too. And none of these have been colored yet, so I’m sure you could do something with that. Maybe experiment with some various palettes? Add prints or patterns to some of these?”

They nodded, gesturing for him to hand back the sheets. He did so, and they scribbled out the notes he’d given on the back of page one, adding them to a long list of crossed out brainstorm ideas that were already there.

Skrael couldn’t help a small, fond smile, before they glanced back up, and he schooled his features into something more neutral.

“I was thinking about some prints on the shirt; they might add something dynamic to them, make them less flat. It’s just, there’s only so much you can add to workout gear before it gets in the way of actual physical activity.” They grumbled.

“Can you not do athleisure wear?” Skrael asked.

“Overton said not to put that many of those pieces in it. He’s looking for functionality.”

Skrael frowned. “Oh. Well, okay, so, not too many distracting prints, but a few would be alright, right?”

They nodded. “Yeah; a few. I’ll probably rely on patterned fabrics, though. Lots of geometrics.”

“Ah, yeah! Geometrics are nice for workout gear.”

“Mhm. Thing is, there’s only so many hexagons you can apply to something before it gets repetitive.” Their voice was wry.

Skrael snorted. “True.”

Silence fell in the room, then, as they both tried to brainstorm further ways to combat the unoriginality problem.

After a few moments, Bellroc finally chucked out an idea, and Skrael picked it up and ran with it, leading them to a new idea, which again allowed Skrael to follow it to another one, giving Bellroc even more creative inspiration. They carried on this way for a while, Skrael eventually ending up in a pulled up chair next to Bellroc at their desk, as they traded concepts back and forth, occasionally throwing out ridiculous ones, just to get the other laughing.

Finally, Skrael suggested, “Maybe you could mess with texture? Or some different-looking fabrics?” He perked up. “Oh! How about--”

Their eyes went wide. “Reflective metallics?” They finished for him, also sitting up straighter, and he flushed.

“Have you already considered that one?”

“No, but I…”

“--like those kinds of flashes when you need to spice up a piece. Right. That’s exactly why I was gonna suggest it.” he caught on, smiling.

“Exactly.” They grinned back. “Well. This has been a very successful session. It seems I should have started the Mr. Brightside loop, earlier, hm?”

Skrael laughed softly, “Maybe so. Do you think you’ve got enough concepts now?”

Bellroc beamed. “Yeah. Thanks to you.”

Skrael shook his head. “Thanks to your brilliance.”

Bellroc got a funny look on their face that Skrael couldn’t quite identify, but to avoid an awkward silence after his… disarmingly honest compliment, he said, “So. Can I steal you for a break, now?”

Bellroc looked a touch relieved at the subject change, before a sly grin crossed their face. “Mmm… if I was convinced…” They shot back.

“Well…” Skrael’s eyes turned mischievous. “We haven’t had a bad horror movie night in a while.”

“Oh, that might just do it.” They smirked.

Skrael resisted the laugh that threatened to break his demeanor, as he playfully said, “I know what you like.” He winked.

Not one to be outdone, they matched his tone. “You sure do, darling.”

“Only the best for you, my dear.” Skrael stood back up, but before Bellroc could stand, too, he moved one hand to their shoulder, looking them in the eyes.

“But, first. On a serious note, are you sure you’re feeling up to it? I won’t force you; I just think a break will be good for you.”

Bellroc stared into Skrael’s eyes, searching for something, before their face eased into a softer expression. “...Yeah. I’m sure. I feel a lot better, now. Which is also thanks to you.”

Skrael was no stranger to their hugs, so feeling their arms loop around him, he adjusted quickly, reaching to wrap his arms around their shoulders, placing one hand on the back of their head.

“I’ve got your back, Bells. Always.”

Neither of them acknowledged the soft brush of his lips against their forehead, for fear of breaking whatever had just passed in the air between them, but as Skrael’s chest warmed, and Bellroc’s face heated, they both allowed themselves a hidden, indulgent grin.

#:D #fashionista how do you look? - rival designers au #P. S. y'all have exactly one guess to guess who gave Bells that mug ;D #(it is not a trick question)#(it's exactly who you think)#ok to rb #(forgot to put that tag on the other one but you can on that one too!)

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boukenboy · 3 years

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#16: アンジェリーク魔恋の六騎士 / Angelique: Maren no Rokukishi

Angelique: Maren no Rokukishi was a visual novel released by Koei in collaboration with Otomate, a developer of many otome games within Japan. It follows the story of Teresa, a young girl whose parents went missing when she was very young. She lives in the city of Siva with her adoptive family - an unnamed grandmother and her annoying brother, Renaud. After hearing strange rumors about a series of kidnappings within the city, she falls victim to a masked assailant later that night, only to wake up in her room a day later with no recollection of what had happened to her. Read on for drama!

Her brother disappears too, and Teresa beings to desperately search for the boy. She soon finds him within the company of a band of traveling mercenaries. She pleads for him to return, but Renaud refuses, pledging his loyalty to the captain of the mysterious group, Leviath. Faced with a lack of options and her brother's stubborn reluctance to return home, she begs the one-eyed weirdo to serve as his assistant, as Renaud is prone to exhaustion and illness. He agrees, and soon Teresa finds herself on an interstellar adventure, supporting the knights as they serve various clients.

Maren no Rokukishi focuses on the nature of war. When is violence justified? Is it worth it? Do the ends always justify the means? The game explores all of these at some point, and overall, its surprisingly cynical and dark, in a sharp contrast to the colorful art direction. Family ties are broken, betrayals abound, and the action sequences are surprisingly well-written. There are sections in Maren that I found myself completely absorbed in the writing - despite being the type to skim fight-scenes, especially those written in a language that I am not a native speaker of.

Unfortunately, most of the above happens in the final hours of the main route - the rest is simply not that interesting, primarily due to the focus on Renaud. So much of Maren revolves around him, and quite frankly, he is easily the worst member of the cast. Renaud is whiny, naïve, occasionally bratty, and has an incredibly irritating voice. He collapses at the slightest bit of effort, and yet everybody in the cast dotes on him and sees zero no issue with letting him lead his own army. Make no mistake, this is not Teresa's story. It is his.

When you're not experiencing Renaud's latest temper tantrum, depressive episode, or fainting spell, you'll be treated to amusing slice-of-life vignettes of Teresa adjusting to a mercenary lifestyle. You'll be harassed by a drunk, attacked by bandits, threatened with your life at the slightest suspicion, and so forth. Like I said earlier, Maren really only picks up in the final hours, where the shit hits the proverbial fan and characters start dropping like flies. The ending is honestly shocking in how far it plunges into campy tragedy - think Game of Thrones, but actually entertaining. I said what I said.

Thankfully, the other routes solve the Renaud issue entirely. But there is a caveat: in order to unlock these routes, you have to complete the main story first. I am of two minds about this feature. On one hand, I think its interesting that the designers have you experience their fantasy epic before allowing the player to romance their favorite knight, but on the other, I don't think that Maren's "canon" story is strong enough to justify it - there's just too much focus on one character, and he's not even remotely likeable. I did some research before writing this game, and found someone who agreed with me, saying, roughly translated from memory, "...but there was too much Renaud, so I'm taking off a star."

The individual routes are much stronger. My favorite of those that I've played was Giovanni - he's basically the ultimate twink: a hard-drinking, gambling, blackmailing scammer who loves trouble. His route is very light-hearted, which was a welcome relief from the drama present throughout the rest of the game, and his playful nature reminds me a bit of a particular ex of mine, so I'm naturally a bit biased. The main conflict in his route occurs during their second date: he carefully arranges a luxurious all-day experience with Teresa. They go to the opera! He gives her a new dress! A fancy restaurant! Flowers! It's amazing!

It is then revealed that he was able to go to such excesses because he scammed rich people out of their money. Teresa, for whatever reason, is appalled at this, and basically tears him apart, making a huge scene in public, even - and I was completely dumbfounded. This might be a bit too political for a gaming blog, but I personally would have no issue with someone I am interested in romantically treating me to a five-star experience through some rich asshole's money. They'll be fine, they're rich - who cares? It would be one thing if he was beating up orphans in the street, but Giovanni only targets those who can afford a little blackmail. He is the ideal husband. Teresa should deal with it.

Kiefer's route was incredibly moving, albeit in a more personal way - this blonde mad lad is absolutely insane, and for a good part of the story, Teresa is left unsure as to whether or not he wants to love her or kill her. With most characters of this type, they quickly warm up to you, but Kiefer is different: if Teresa expresses even something even slightly disagreeable in his mind, he would not hesitate to slaughter her on the spot. He is also the character I'm most attracted to, and that says a lot about me and I don't want to talk about it.

As I said earlier, Maren has a streak of denying the supposed inherent value of family, and there is no greater example of this than in his route: Kiefer kills his brother, an adorable himbo struggling to adjust to high society, in cold-blood, and then attempts to do the same with his father, who, as we find out, tended to dote on his twin-brother. As someone who has been disowned by my own family, Kiefer's rage resonated with me. We, as children, take in our parent's biases, for better or worse, and when we cannot live up to them, it creates a disconnect. I have not spoken to my family in nearly five years. I could understand and identify with Kiefer's rage. I wouldn't go as far as to kill my own family, but who knows what would have happened should I not have left my home town?

I did not know this when I first began playing Maren, but the game is an adaption of a light novel released after Angelique: Tenkuu no Requiem, which is itself an RPG spin-off of Angelique Special 2. This makes Maren a spin-off of a spin-off, but despite that, I still had plenty of fun with the game - I just wish the main route was realized a bit better. I usually like to replay certain routes to better formulate my opinions, but Maren focuses entirely too much on a character I could not stand. I'd definitely recommend this to fans of Angelique, particularly the sequels mentioned above, as I'm sure the game contains all sorts of references to the source materials, but on its own, it's a bit lacking overall. That being said, as much as Maren lacks, there are certain scenes that were so well-done that I found myself genuinely moved. It's an uneven experience, but one worth looking into!

#otomate #ruby party #otome #otome games #visual novel #fantasy game #retro gaming #gaymer #review #angelique #angelique series #played several other routes but this review was long enough

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dorizardthewizard · 4 years

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So I watched the Eurovision movie

Uh, I have a lot of thoughts because this is the closest we’re gonna get to the real thing this year ;^; First, the positives!

What they got right:

Overall, I like that it wasn’t really taking the piss out of the competition – whether you agree or not with how it was portrayed, the creators do have a lot of love for the show and that is reflected in how much it means to the characters. I think it was fitting to start with the kids watching and being inspired by ABBA’s win (I’m always up for showing people where the group’s fame started), and making it their life goal to perform in the contest. Just like Lars and Sigrit, many musicians in Europe grow up with Eurovision being an annual tradition and it’s their big dream to one day perform on that international stage, so yeah I think it decently showed how important ESC is here.

They got the overall vibe right too – most of the songs really felt like Eurovision songs (maybe a little dated but still), from the Viking-Europop opener to the Lordi-aesthetic one to whatever the hell Russia was doing. I don’t think Greece’s song was something they’d ever send though; it fits the character but not what the country typically sends. Then again, Estonia have sent an opera song in Italian and Romania sent yodel rap so actually, I take back that statement. They were missing a Balkan ballad though! Staging was on point – I think it was filmed at the Tel Aviv stage so that’s obviously a factor, but big angel wings and hamster wheels also bring a lot of familiarity :P No pianos being set on fire though, which, in a movie with so many on-stage disasters, is honestly surprising.

Of course there’s also the past contestant cameos, for that I’ll say one thing – needs more Verka. Maybe some contestants from earlier years would have been nice too, at least we did hear Céline Dion’s song in the song-along. Would also have been nice if the whole mashup was Eurovision songs, instead of throwing in some other ones just to make it more recognizable for non-Eurofans. Otherwise, the mashup was really seamless and sounded good.

Another thing the movie got right was European’s attitudes to Americans, not sure how I feel about it since the movie was made by Americans, but it’s self-aware and pretty funny :P There’s also the funny gag about countries not wanting to host because of how expensive it is, not sure why a guy working for the national broadcaster would care about that but looking at Iceland’s population size, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was also an economist for the government or something.

What they got wrong:

Of course, there were some things they didn’t quite get right. First of all, did the UK win for it to be hosted in Scotland??? Unless Australia won, or some other country that didn’t want to host or something. They actually made a joke about UK getting zero points, but they said it’s because no one likes us, when in reality we just send the blandest songs :/

There were also a whole lot of technical inaccuracies like Sweden breaking the rule on number of people allowed on stage, big five countries taking part in the semi-final (come on, how can you not get that right? Maybe they were afraid Americans wouldn’t recognise half the flags? :P), the contestants were just sitting by themselves in some room like it’s The Voice or something, their delegations nowhere to be seen, and then there’s the total lack of security or planning around the competition, with Lars just running around doing whatever. The countries presenting their votes in the semi-final stood out as well, but since we didn’t get to see the final I can brush over it, just so we experience the voting somewhere in the movie. Wonder why they didn’t use past contestants for the points announcements? They also had the French one speaking in English but you know what, they remembered to make sure he was standing in front of the Eiffel Tower so I’ll let them off :P

One thing that did bother me was how hard the movie tried to make us think the Icelandic song was a failure, except the song wasn’t even bad so they had to resort to all the incidents on stage. They even had that complete silence after the hamster wheel incident, and there is NO WAY that would ever happen – even the null points songs get cheers! In fact, people would cheer harder, and I don’t think Graham Norton, or anyone for that matter, would be that surprised that people remembered the song and actually gave it points (oh yeah, great to see him in this!).

Okay, some of those inaccuracies were nitpicks, but they’re just fun to point out. I don’t think they quite nailed the portrayal though, but more on that later.

The movie itself:

Judging the rest of the film, the humour really didn’t do it for me- it was just kind of jarring that one half of the movie felt like your usual light-hearted music contest film that was fairly rooted in reality, then the next there’s a dismembered ghost of Demi Lovato and a guy getting stabbed by Elves??? I know it’s classic Will Ferrel random comedy but honestly, those parts could have been cut out of the movie just fine, it’s like half an hour too long anyway and you can tell by the way the humour drags. It can basically be summarised by the ending scene where Lars is yelling at the Americans and then just keeps going, and I know that’s the joke in that scene but they do this throughout the whole movie – something will happen and the characters will keep reacting back and forth and it’s honestly exhausting. That might just be me though, maybe I’d prefer more witty and self-aware humour in a Eurovision movie but I guess non-fans wouldn’t get half the jokes so they went for over-the-top ridiculousness ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As for the characters, Sigrit was great; she’s a good mix between cute and weird. Lars is… annoying tbh, maybe I just don’t care for Will Ferrel's character type but when Alexander asks Lars what he can possibly offer Sigrit I was like “yeah Lars, what CAN you offer?”. Their relationship was cute though and his arc about caring too much about winning was decent, it does kind of resonate with Eurovision because yeah, lots of countries will revamp their songs to have English lyrics and the style is increasingly converging to Americanized radio-friendly pop music. I do wish they’d focused more on this conflict, rather than bringing in a love square (?) with Alexander and Mita.

Speaking of Alexander, I actually liked how they portrayed the Russian character; he wasn’t a villain, he was fun to watch and was genuinely happy to see Sigrit succeed. I did not expect them to go there with the whole “there are no gays in Russia” thing – I laughed but also actually felt for the guy, and his friendship with Mita was peak mlm/wlw solidarity, it was sweet.

The ending:

For me, this is where it goes American Hollywood style and kinda reminds me of Madonna’s speech about everyone being winners. Felt like I was watching Camp Rock for a second then (which is funny since Demi is in this movie) – all the other acts are fun songs but we’ll just change ours to a ballad so it must be more heartfelt and resonate with the audience, as if a good chunk of ESC songs aren’t ballads already!! To be fair, they do well in having it be a personal song about her hometown and adding in parts in Icelandic (although I’ve heard it’s so butchered you can’t understand what’s being said), it’s a sweet ode to one of the best parts of Eurovision – celebrating where you’re from and making your country proud.

Wish they’d focused more on that tbh, we really could have done without Lars speaking to the audience – that’s the more Hollywood moment for me and kind of reminds me of acts that try to connect with the audience like it’s a concert. Sorry but we don’t do that here :P Instead of the “music is feeling”-like message, it would have been nice if the movie was more directed towards celebrating why the contest is so big and important even decades after it began, and how it literally brings an entire continent together for one night. This would have been nice especially because of all the cynicism towards ESC and its dismissal as just a dumb, campy event with no quality music whatsoever.

Huh, I just remembered there are no live instruments at Eurovision so how everyone can hear the piano at the end is beyond me, also the instrumental kicks in despite the fact that that song has never been recorded in a studio, let alone able to be played out loud onstage. But I’ll just imagine that’s for us to see, the audience actually just heard her singing and nothing else. I don’t think it would have been that impressive, so Iceland probably won everyone’s hearts through memes instead :’D

Overall, I don’t think the movie was terribly offensive or anything, just some silly fun that missed out on the potential of better portraying the Eurovision spirit. I might eventually watch it again, but with skipping out half the comedy :P

#eurovision #esc #eurovision movie #the story of fire saga #feel free to share thoughts if you were crazy enough to read all this!#my posts

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comradeclown · 4 years

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OK, so in honour of my top posts now being me saying at various degrees of length that Arthur is gay (hashtag mylegacy, lmao…), I thought I should just go for it and actually dive in a bit a lot into why I read the character as gay. Now, usually all the justification I need to read a character as gay is “wouldn’t it be cool if this character I like/relate to/etc were gay like me?” and “it’s OK, officer, I do what I want”, and I’m well aware that 99% of the time it’s me using my own creativity to do a resistant reading + the film/book/whatever bumbling into subtext entirely by accident. And while I definitely don’t think there’s ever any more justification needed for any kind of LGBT reading, lol, as it comes to Arthur, obviously feel free to disagree with me, but I honestly think my read of him as a gay man is entirely textually supported, however unwitting and accidental that might have been on the part of the filmmakers (mind you, I don’t think it was Todd Phillips’ conscious intent, but I’m like… 85% sure Joaquin Phoenix knew exactly what he was doing).

(ETA that this is extremely long, so I’ve put it all under a cut.)

First of all, there’s of course… pretty much the entirety of Joaquin Phoenix’s performance (a very, very small sample can be found in my he gay son tag and just generally in my arthur fleck tag, ha), from his mannerisms to his physicality to the way he interacts with other characters. I know part of it is a function of wanting to go back to the character’s campy roots (which are themselves… you know…), and I know I’m relying on stereotypes to some extent, but first of all, you can’t divorce either camp or gender non-conformity from LGBT history and existence, and secondly this is literally how characters have been coded as gay throughout the entire history of cinema. What I’m saying here is that you can’t have a character who acts like Arthur does, literal limp wrist and all, or says “come on, Muuuurrrayyy, do I look like the kind of girl clown who could start a movement” the way he does, to pick one of many, many examples, and not evoke the long history of cinematic wink emojis at People Like Me.

That in itself would… honestly be plenty, lol, but it could be chalked up to, idk, Joaquin Phoenix doing his own thing, were it not for the fact that it’s completely reinforced at every turn by the filmmaking language, even down to his wardrobe choices, and it’s worth noting at this point that the framing is always one of empathy — albeit with nuance — and affording the character subjectivity, rather than being “ew, look at this gross [homophobic slur]”. Like, the very first time we see Arthur, literally our first impression of the character, he’s at a mirror, putting on make-up and then ruining it by crying, and while the make-up is of course part of his job, this is just not how the inner crises of straight male characters are expressed in the language of cinema. Of note too is the fact that he’s clearly visually separated from his co-workers in all the scenes at Ha-Ha’s, indicating his alienation from them, and while this could be chalked up purely to his disabilities, I don’t buy that that’s the only reason, given that Gary gets shit due to his dwarfism, sure, but at the end of the day he’s clearly “one of the boys” in a way Arthur (can’t be) isn’t.

There are honestly so many examples of the framing working to separate Arthur from conventional masculinity and heterosexuality that I’m just going to pick some highlights, such as: obviously, the way he expresses himself emotionally through dancing (to the point that one of his coworkers explicitly ribs him about it, “if your dancing doesn’t do the trick”), which again is not something that straight male characters do in the language of cinema. The fact that all the media we see him consume is musicals, classic comedies and a talk show he’s obsessively fannish about and watches with his mother — and we know he’s a fan of the show as a whole, not just Murray, hence him saying “I love Dr Sally” (and the way he says it…). Or, speaking of his media habits, when he’s dancing with the gun while watching Shall We Dance, this could have so, so easily been about him ~regaining his lost masculinity~ through, say, fantasies of revenge or badassery, but instead it’s about him being acknowledged as a great dancer and punishing bad dancers, and it all ends in slapstick anyway.

Also, while I’m on this topic, I want to address the nature of Arthur’s dissociative fantasies about Sophie. Honestly, I don’t read them as indicative of genuine romantic/sexual interest at all, because the film frames them as identical to Arthur’s more deliberate daydreams about Murray. I mean, not that I’m adverse to gay readings of that if that’s what you want to do, lmao, but to me they’re both very clearly post-traumatic fantasies of having another person look after you for once, of having someone value and cherish you and take care of you emotionally (which obviously has massive appeal if you’ve been dealing with the after-effects of catastrophic trauma all your life but nobody has given a shit about your suffering and you’ve had to be the one to look after other people to boot). Note that after the get-together with Sophie — which is clearly patterned after all those old comedies and musicals Arthur watches — the Sophie fantasies are incredibly platonic and involve things like having another person be there for you in a crisis, telling you something supportive, getting you a hot drink (in contrast with the reality of the hospital scene, in which Arthur is alone and he’s the one trying to comfort someone else, i.e., holding Penny’s hand), essentially no different from fantasy!Murray hugging Arthur and knowing exactly what to say to make him feel good about himself. Also note that both fantasies involve being the object of someone else’s affection, Murray picks Arthur out of the audience and Sophie comes to him, it’s a pillow princess Cinderella fantasy, more than someone loving you it’s about being loved. (And, once more, this could easily have all been v. v. different, the Murray fantasy could have been the much more conventionally masculine fantasy of being a famous comedian and being invited on Murray’s show, the Sophie fantasies could have had an undeniable sexual component, etc.)

Anyway, to get back to the general point of cinematic framing, again if the movie didn’t want me to read Artie as gay, it shouldn’t have had a pivotal moment in his character arc be him sitting at his mother’s vanity table, doing a new make-up look which involves using her lipstick, and then having a Moment while he’s literally holding a quasi-glamour shot of her.

And the thing is, all these reams of stuff aren’t even the key piece of the puzzle for me, which is the way in which the film as a whole can be read as a gay narrative. I’ve posted before about how part of the emotional catharsis of the film is about Arthur finally shamelessly embracing and even revelling in all his freakishness and socially-despised traits, a big one of which being what is arguably his effeminacy and… honestly I don’t need to explain how that’s a classic gay (and more generally LGBT) narrative, do I? Like, there’s a reason why a pivotal scene is Arthur having his hair-dyeing underwear rave in a flat that’s suddenly incredibly bright and sunny for the first time, it’s about reclaiming the pain and ugliness of your life and your circumstances into a space of potential liberation, which is honestly why this movie is always going to be incredibly personally meaningful to me for so many reasons, but definitely meaningful to me as a gay woman. (Again, this could so, so easily have been about him becoming some stone-cold badass or whatever, but instead the film has him dye his hair, put on a super garish new outfit and new make-up look, dance shamelessly in the street, and be incredibly campy on national television.)

More generally, there’s other aspects of the narrative arc that tie into this general theme and which also serve to continually distance Arthur from the conventional cinematic narratives of heterosexual manhood: for instance, once he starts fully embracing the Joker persona — which is… just Arthur, the crucial difference is in how others perceive him and how he perceives himself — any attraction to women, feigned or real, goes completely out the window and the only genuinely affectionate interaction he has with another human being is with Gary (I know we all love to joke about his first kiss being with Dr Sally, but it’s obviously Comedy Jokes and he doesn’t even kiss her for real, his make-up is completely intact; Arthur’s only real kiss in the movie is when he kisses Gary). Or, when Arthur’s personal narrative finally intersects completely with the larger social narrative — which is itself about upheaval, reclamation and potential liberation — the big triumphant moment is him once again dancing, this time for a cheering crowd, and using blood like lipstick to redraw his smile.

Or even, to a lesser extent, his whole sub-plot with his mother, before I watched the film I was worried that this was going to be the usual narrative about the henpecked guy who finally puts the bitch in her place as part of becoming a Real Man, and it’s not at all, quite the opposite, Arthur is not henpecked and is clearly in charge of the household, he genuinely loves Penny — and is confident she loves him back — and enjoys doing at least some things with her (them watching the Murray Franklin Show together), and up until the reveal any issues he has with her are largely the product of having to look after an ill person with zero social support and while working a physically and emotionally demanding job and dealing with his own disabilities. When he kills her, it’s a deeply sad and self-destructive scene and it’s the result of his profound anguish and sense of betrayal and he frames it as the bitter, trauma-haunted dark half of self-actualisation and self-acceptance (“that’s the real me”, “I haven’t been happy one minute of my entire fucking life”, “now I realise… it’s a fucking comedy”).

Or, at a more meta-textual level, the way the film is unabashedly both a pulpy thriller and a melodrama, just shamelessly embracing all its emotions, its pain and catharsis, without a trace of irony. Like, yeah, part of this is the immense sincerity and compassion Joaquin Phoenix brings to his performance, but it really is the movie’s approach as a whole, and when there is humour — and I do think there’s quite a lot of humour in the movie — it’s not the distancing, let’s-not-feel-anything-too-deeply-bro humour of your typical MCU movie, it’s the camp sensibility of laughing with and at your own tragedy. (Myriad examples down to the use of certain songs in the soundtrack.)

On a final note, you guys know how much I don’t care about authorial intent, but I feel compelled to point out that in his director’s commentary, Todd Phillips says, while discussing Arthur’s journey into becoming Joker, that he reads the larger pop-cultural character of the Joker as someone who doesn’t want women, and like… Again, it’s not like I think that he was deliberately making a gay narrative in any way, it’s just that if you’re creating this journey of a man who eventually becomes a character who’s not interested in women in that sense, you’ve also just ended up stumbling into a gay narrative accidentally on purpose, lmao, what’s the real difference between “at the end of the story, Arthur doesn’t want women because he’s ~da Joker now, baby, he doesn’t want anything~” and “at the end of the story, Arthur doesn’t want women because he’s gay and he’s no longer deeply repressed and closeted”?

Anyway, like I said, feel free to disagree, he’s a fictional character, lol, but this is where I’m coming from, and the reason why if everyone involved in the movie decided to make a statement tomorrow about how much Arthur Fleck wants to bone women I’d just say “shit, idc, I’m afraid you made a gay movie about Arthur Fleck, a gay man, it’s a little too late to retcon this bitch now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯”. Also this is over 2,000 words long what the fuck I am so sorry

#long post #joker 2019 #class struggle clown movie #arthur fleck #dive down into chuckletown #he gay son #now in the form of 95 theses nailed to my tumblr #gonna make a letterboxd list called 'the author is dead this is lgbt cinema now'

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