#someone you know finally listened to a Mechanisms album

[queen0funova]

Obsessed with how the only part of the entire The Bifrost Incident album that got stuck in my head is Edda screaming "Shut Up!"

#the mechanisms #if this whole thing is in italics #I'm sorry #tumblr is being weird #The Bifrost Incident #hi KT #someone you know finally listened to a Mechanisms album #also hi Zom #I would be legit surprised if you haven't listened to them

[six-eyed-samurai]

AGAIN AND AGAIN - A REINCARNATION AU

Help, what have I done? Sorry if this doesn't fit the characters, I was writing it sleep deprived and as neutral as possible. Support me and my poetry (that I came up with in the shower)

Heavens blessed me with you

The Knight, who when your parents announced you would marry you off to some elderly Lord, kept true to his word and took you away, escaping into the clashing colors of freedom and love in another kingdom far, far away, only for your world to darken into black and white once more when your enraged parents caught up and had him executed; it was now your turn to keep your side of the oath and join him in the afterlife when you drank the poisoned chalice.

In every rebirth

The Roman General who passed by you, lashing out any "potential buyer" when he walked disgusted through the slave market - he bought you freedom and yet somehow you stayed with him forever willingly cuffed by shackles of affection...until he died of an assassination and you were hung for having an "affair" with someone of higher class, but not before you both screamed to whatever god that would listen to come back to each other once more.

I promise I'll find you

The Baker who's never cared a penny about the other air headed girls from his small British village until you, a young noble lady recently moved into the old Baskerville Manor, turned up requesting his help in setting a banquet. Excuses after excuses pile up from both sides in an attempt to extend your brief time together but soon, oh, too soon, you leave as per your family's orders and he's left to wonder how you're doing now, because after years and years of searching they refused to let him in.

Through tears, death, dreams and mirth

The White American who finds you working day in day out at the laundry lady's for little to no pay, so from his not so small tips grew to slipping love letters through the pockets of his clothes, but soon you're fired and bade to leave for your skin colour and he's still bitterly cursing the townspeople for their blind racism.

And I know it's just a gamble

The Hockey player who grins at you who always shows up to his games in every match until he asks you out on an ice skating date, but alas, how could he have known that the day you finally showed up in his jersey, much to his delight, would be the day a crazed fan clubbed you on the head with his own hockey stick, much to your doom? He left the industry as cold as the rink.

Unfair, repeated roll of dice

The F1 Racer who whines about the most ridiculous problems happening to his car and making bad impressions of the other drivers just to see his beloved mechanic even crack a smile - no oil or dirt stained on you could ever dim that brilliant smile when you both went on a joyride together into the sunset...oh, wait, his death on the track did.

But in this temporary, fleeting

The Roommate who knows exactly what you want for breakfast every morning, and soon it spiraled into having a meal together for lunch and dinner too, especially when he added candles and rose petals! You still make your coffee the same way he did even after your studies took you abroad and both of you decided it was for the best to break up.

Moment in fast ending time

The Landlord who did NOT expect such a cute little you to move on when he decided to make a little cash on the side renting out his spare room...never mind, it's still on rent because now you've moved into his room. He managed to save your photo album from the charred remains of your house though...although he couldn't save you.

Tell me, oh tell me

The Drug dealer who just recently entered your big brother's gang, who protected you with his scrawny body every time any sexually frustrated asshole came to harass you. Your declarations of love didn't come in heartfelt words or gifts but a smoked joint with each other. You both didn't get delusional, because why should you when your fantasies were right in front? It was the same when you overdosed after someone ratted him out and sent him to a life sentence in prison.

Darling love of mine

The Mafioso who charms you with his suave words and cool under fire attitude, causing you to giggle and kick your feet whenever he came back to your door with flirtations and blood on his face from those who disrespected the mob boss's goddaughter. It was the classic romantic Italian dinner when he got down one one knee...except for the part when his rivals arrived to gun him down and you're left staring at his broken body and shattered ring.

You're just as lost

The Neighbour who had no idea the babysitter for the kids next door would be so goddamned FINE - if only he hadn't fumbled and stumbled over his words in the elevator! But that's alright, even little Ray and Katie are rooting for him and you! Your first date might not be fancy, but he was more starstruck in awe of you than he was of the night sky as you sat on top of the roof.

In paradise

"I feel like I've know you all my life."

"In every lifetime?"

"Maybe!"

And somewhere deep inside, you both knew it for certain: the endless cycles of pain were finally broken.

"I'm so glad of whatever karma that I did in my previous life got me to meet you!"

"You better continue it in this life so I can see you in the next one!"

Not karma, actually, but a series of broken promises finally repaired.

***

Sukuna, Giyuu, Kokushibo, Gojo, Takemitchy, Mikey, Ranpo, Nikolai, Kirishima, Hawks, Kakashi, Nishinoya, Kuroo, Toji, Kazutora, Nanami, Eren Yeager, Gyutaro, Kunikida, Zuko, Yuta, Inumaki, Levi, your favourites!

#multi fandoms posts #X READER #tokyo revengers #demon slayer #jjk #tokyo rev #Jjk x reader #tokyo rev x reader #Kny x reader #AoT x reader #haikyuu x reader #ATLA x reader #Sukuna x reader #GIYUU x reader #Kokushibo x reader #Gojo x reader #Takemitchy x reader #Mikey x reader #Ranpo x reader #Nikolai x reader #kirishima x reader #Hawks x reader #Kakashi x reader #Nishinoya x reader #Kuroo x reader #Toji x reader #Kazutora x reader #Nanami x reader #eren yaeger x reader #gyutaro x reader

[jamdoughnutmagician]

A Cut Above The Rest

Mechanic!Eddie x Fem!Hairdresser!Reader

Will You Be My Girl? (Part 10) FINAL PART

Summary:Things are starting to look up for you as the prospect of a new job comes your way, and the boy of your dreams has one final surprise for you (sorry I suck at summaries but I didn't want to spoil anything!!)

also I highly suggest listening to this just so you can imagine the same thing I imagined when I wrote a particular scene.

Thank you so much to everyone and anyone who read and enjoyed this fic. Writing it was at times very challenging but it warms my heart to know that even a small handful of people liked this story. 🧡

Word Count:1,988

<- Previous Part

Masterlist Series Masterlist

It takes you about an hour and a half to drive into Indianapolis, the sounds of Shania Twain’s ‘Come On Over’ album filtering through your car’s CD player as you pull up outside of the salon in the centre of town.

The exterior of the building already looks way more fancier than any other establishment you’ve ever set foot in, never mind worked in, with colourful lights and flowers decorating the windows.

You pick up your portfolio from your passenger side seat and make your way to the salon. You push through the door, with a chirpy bell ringing above you as you do.

You approach the front desk where a young girl with long, dark braids greets you.

“Hello, Welcome to Blossom Studios, how can I help you today?” she smiles, her pearly teeth shining between glossy lips.

“Um hi, I spoke to Madison Martin on the phone a few days ago, I have a meeting with her today.” you say confidently.

“Ah yes, of course! You must be Y/n? I heard Maddie talking about you. Right this way.” she smiles as she brings you through the salon’s already busy floor to a small room toward the back.

The girl knocks on the door,

“Hey! Maddie, your girl is here.” she shouts.

“Thank you, Naomi, send her in.” comes the voice from behind the door.

Naomi pushes the door open for you, and ushers you into the small back-room.

A woman with her glossy strawberry blonde hair styled back into a sleek and professional ponytail stands up to greet you.

“Hi, I’m Madison, you must be Y/n, right?” she smiles as she extends her hand for you to shake.

“Yes, that’s me.” you nod politely as you shake her offered hand.

“Well, we’re a bit short staffed at the moment, and we are looking for people to work here on a more permanent basis, and when I saw your advertisement in the library, I thought I’d take a chance on you.”

“Well I’m very glad of the opportunity.” you smile. “If I may, I’d like to show you my portfolio?” you say raising the black ring binder in your hands.

“Of course, I’d love to see your work.” she returns as you hand over your folder.

You sit quietly as Madison begins to leaf through your folder, looking over the pictures of your work, as well as reading through your resume and cover letter.

“I see that you're a very accomplished stylist, and have a very well-put together portfolio. If you’re willing, I would love to ask you to be a part of our styling team.” she smiles brightly handing over your portfolio back to you.

“That would be amazing! I would love to” you cheer.

“That’s wonderful news, of course for the first two weeks, we’ll have one of our senior stylists shadow you, and show you how we do things around here, but I think that someone like you could be a great asset to our team” Madison praised.

“Again, thank you so much for this wonderful opportunity, I promise I’ll give it my all.” you reassure her with a confident smile.

“I’m sure you will.” she shakes your hand once more. “You start Monday at nine o’clock.”

“Nine o’clock it is, I’ll see you then. Thank you again.” You smile brightly as you gather your things back up and make your way out of the Salon.

You get back into your car before breaking into a small victory cheer, thinking how things couldn’t have gone any better for you. 

You reach into your bag to pull out your phone, immediately wanting to call Robin to tell her the good news.

The line rings three times before she picks up, her voice already eager to hear what you had to say.

“Well? Did you get it? Did you get the job?” she babbles out.

“I got the job!” you tell her, beaming with happiness and a wide smile spreading across your face.

You have to hold your phone away from your ear slightly as the sound of enthusiastic screams from your best friend echo down the line.

“I knew you would get it! I told you!” she exclaims, with a cheerful laugh. “Get back here and I’ll treat you to a celebratory drink in The Hideout!” 

“You’re on, Buckley. I’ll see you there.” you say as you end the phone call and begin to make your way back into Hawkins.

“Right, I just got off the phone with Y/n” Robin says, pulling Eddie closer. “So that gives you about an hour and a half to make sure everything is ready to go for when she gets here, okay?”

“Relax, Buckley. I know the plan. I worked it out myself, I’ll have you know.” Eddie replies confidently.

“Okay, so when she gets here, I’m going to bring her in, get a drink with her at the bar, and then you and your boys are on, got it?” She reiterates the plan once more, going through it, making sure every last detail goes as it should.

“Got it.” Eddie nods, his shaggy curls bouncing as he does, before turning to go set up things on the stage.

“Oh! Eddie?” Robin calls out to him. “Good luck.” she smiles giving him a thumbs up.

He rewards her with a thumbs up of his own before setting up the stage with the rest of Corroded Coffin.

You walk into the already busy and bustling Hideout, and surely enough Robin is there to greet you with wide open arms.

“There she is! The girl of the hour” she smiles, bringing you into a squeezing tight hug. “I knew you’d nail it”

“Thanks Rob!” you nod.

“Now how about I buy you a celebratory beer?” 

“Sounds perfect to me.” 

You take the time to enjoy a quiet drink with your friend on a Friday evening, catching up with each other, and just talking about everything and anything.

“Y’know, Eddie’s performing with his band in a bit, shall we head down to the stage to watch him?”

You can’t help the butterflies that flutter in your stomach at the mention of his name.

You link your arm around Robin’s and make your way over to the seats in front of the stage.

The guitars, drum kit and microphone stand are already wired and set up, as Eddie and the rest of the band make their way on to the stage.

He looks every inch the rockstar you know he is, with his beloved Dio vest thrown over a dark Judas Priest t-shirt. Ripped black jeans and a pair of black DMs complete his look.  He saunters up to the microphone as he slings his crackled red and black guitar across his body.

“Good evening everyone!” he shouts out to the small gathered crowd, earning him a few cheers “I hope everyone’s having a great day! We are Corroded Coffin, and tonight we are here to make your Friday a little bit more metal.” he rasps as he leans into the microphone with a slight chuckle.

Eddie and the rest of the band launch into their set list, playing a few songs from Black Sabbath, Motörhead, and Metallica. His voice is perfectly gravelly and low as he plays along with the rest of the band perfectly.

“Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to change things up a little.” he says putting his electric guitar on the stand and reaching for his acoustic guitar and taking a seat on a bar stool that had been placed on stage.

“I’ve recently had someone very special come back into my life, and she's amazing, and beautiful and if I'm being honest, totally out of my league..” he chuckles, earning a few laughs from his audience “so I'd like to dedicate this final song to her.”

The rest of the band take a backseat, as Eddie takes centre stage with the spot-light hitting him, illuminating him in a soft golden glow. 

Eddie’s fingers start to pluck the strings of his guitar in perfect rhythm, and suddenly you find yourself turning to Robin with wide eyes when you immediately recognise the opening notes of Whitney Houston’s Saving All My Love For You.  Your favourite song. The song that you had shared with Eddie all those years ago.

Eddie’s raspy voice joins in, the song being slowed and pitched down slightly, perfectly arranged and to fit the slow romantic vibe of the song.

You watch him intently, with the biggest smile on your face, and when his gaze catches yours in the middle of the crowd he gives you a small wink and a smile, letting you know that he sees you, and every word he’s singing is meant for you and nobody else.

The song ends, and applause is heard all around as Eddie puts his guitar down and leans into the microphone one final time.

“Thank you everyone, you’ve been a wonderful audience, and you guys enjoy the rest of your evening.” 

You turn to Robin as you watch Eddie make his way off stage.

“I’m gonna go see him.” you smile before running off to find Eddie.

“Go get your man, girl!” you hear Robin cheer as you 

“Eddie!!” you shout out as you sprint your way to him before colliding your body with his and wrapping your arms around him in the tightest hug you can manage. You feel him return your affections as he slips his arms around you and places a kiss to the crown of your head.

You pull away from him, although you find his hands holding their place on your hips.

“You sang my favourite song.” your voice comes out as no more than a whisper as your emotions catch up with you.

He’s bashful under your gaze, his cheeks blooming with a pink flush. 

“I did.” Eddie nods. “There’s this girl I really like and I kinda wanted to impress her.” he chuckles, as his eyes flick down to your lips. “I also wanted to ask her if she would be my girlfriend.” he flashes you that cheeky boyish smile that you’ve come to love. “So, Y/n, Sweetheart, will you be my girl?”

“Yes!” you smile up at him, your heart bursting with love.

“There’s another thing I’ve been meaning to ask you.” Eddie nodded as he looked at you with those beautiful, big brown eyes.

“Oh?”

“Can I kiss you?”

You rise up on your tip-toes to meet him, kissing him with a soft peck to his lips.

“Indeed you can.” you smirk at him, as you pull away from his lips, only to feel him pull you close to his body.

He presses his lips against yours, one of his hands holds steady on your hips and the other weaves its way into your hair, as he kisses you with all the passion that he has for you. Warmth bloomed in your chest at the gentle brush of Eddie’s lips on yours. Kissing him made you feel dizzy, like a million butterflies fluttering in your stomach. Kissing Eddie just felt right. Like you were always meant to be together like this.

You part from his lips breathlessly with a smile.

“In case it wasn’t already obvious, I love you, have done for a while if I’m being totally honest.” Eddie confesses, his lips curling up in a matching smile.

“I love you too, Eddie.” you nod, taking your hand in his, lacing your fingers together. “I love you a lot, actually.”

When Eddie had helped you after you had broken down on that cold and rainy road on the outskirts of Hawkins, fleeing from heartbreak, you never could have imagined that it would lead to this, but you’re glad it did. Forever thankful to your metal-head in shining leather who helped fix your broken car, and helped to mend your broken heart. 

@penguinsandpotterheads @slutty-thevampireslayer @xxhellfirebunnyxx@mmunson86 @avalon-wolf @ali-r3n @jesssssmaybankk @munsonology

#Eddie munson x reader #Eddie Munson x female reader #Eddie Munson x reader fluff #Eddie Munson x female reader fluff #Eddie Munson fluff #eddie munson series #Eddie Munson fanfic

[bugsinthebayou]

okay how do i get into the mechs ... i would like to know about these robots now i think

GRINS. HI. HELLO.

The Mechanisms are a steampunk space pirate storytelling band!! they are compromised of 9 members (up until one of them left). they retell myths n legends in space, tragic, and queer

they have four main story albums, a single, and two extra albums for extra stories

for the four main albums, you have to listen to all the tracks in order so i recommend listening on youtube

Once Upon A Time (In Space) is their first album. its fairy tales retold as an intergalactic war

Ulysses Dies At Dawn is their second one. this one is greek mythology

High Noon Over Camelot. oh boy high noon over camelot. my favorite mechs album and my favorite album just in general. arthurian legend retold as a space western

The Bifrost Incident. norse myth but eldritch horror

their single is Frankenstein (frankenstein except the monster is an AI), and their other two albums are Tales To Be Told volumes I and II. theyre both collections of extra songs that either work as standalone stories or fit into the same setting as one of the main albums but doesnt follow along the main plotline

they also have Death to the Mechanisms, which was a performance of some of their songs live plus a song of the same name as the album that describes how they died a final time. this was because they split up. no more mechs music </3

out of all of them i recommend hnoc the most. cuz its my favorite <3

i apologize for not explaining the albums further, but you asked about the mechs themselves so im gonna put more focus into explaining those guys

the mechanisms themselves are 9 immortal space pirates. they are immortal due to their mechanisms, mechanical replacements of certain body parts. they travel the galaxy on the starship known as Aurora, who is infact sentient and also dating the ship's engineer. they like to "have fun, violence, adventure, violence. violence." according to jonny

Jonny d'Ville - he/him. he's claims he's the ships captain. hes the first mate. he is the narrator to all of the albums and plays a number of characters. King Cole (ouat(is)), Ulysses (udad), Lancelot (hnoc), Galahad (hnoc), and the void (tbi) are a few. there's more, but theyre more minor. hes pretty shooty and has canonically committed every crime (that existed on a planet) except the sexual ones. his mechanism is his heart!

Gunpowder Tim - he/him. master at arms! hes another one that sings often. he also plays the guitar. a few characters hes been are Oedipus (udad), Gawain (hnoc), and Loki (tbi). his mechanism is his eyes. hes also on the violent side. he blew up the moon, as detailed in the song Gunpowder Tim vs The Moon Kaiser from the ttbt vol 1

Ashes o'Reilly - they/them. quartermaster. they sing often and their voice is beautiful <3 they play bass aswell. some characters theyve played are Hades/themself (udad), Mordred (hnoc), and Sigyn (tbi). their mechanism is their lungs. theyre also a mob boss and arsonist and have been since they were 12 years old, described in their backstory song Lucky Sevens

Drumbot Brian - he/him. pilot. he doesnt sing as often but its great when he does! he plays a few different instruments. a couple of his characters are Merlin/himself (hnoc) and the robot spouse in Stranger (ttbt vol 2). everything except his heart is mechanical. he was thrown into space because he brought someone back to life

The Toy Soldier - it/its. its just there!! it sings often and plays the mandolin. some characters are Cinders (ouat(is)), Orpheus (udad), and Guinevere (hnoc). its a toy soldier. it was never human it just started walking one day

Raphaella la Cognizi - she/her. science officer. she is another singer!! and pianist!! her voice is heavenly tbh. notable roles are Ariadne (udad), Ygraine (hnoc (one song but it Slaps)), and Odin (tbi). her mechanism is a pair of wings!

Marius von Raum - he/him. doctor (not even a doctor). he sings and plays violin. and mandolin the wiki says. Heracles (udad), Arthur (hnoc), Thor (tbi). his mechanism is his right arm

Ivy Alexandria - she/her. archivist. she plays a few wind instruments, no singing. her mechanism is her brain

Nastya Rasputina - she/her. engineer. she is in gay love with the sentient starship <3. she plays violin, no singing. her mechanism is her blood, which is mercury. she decided to go Out (she believed that aurora was no longer the same starship she fell in love with because of all the repairs over the centuries theyve been alive, so she takes the final piece of the original aurora and exits out of the airlock, never to be seen again) sometime after hnoc

and there you are!! them!!

despite me giving some examples to who they play in the albums, thats not all the characters they play. theres also extra characters in narration i didnt mention (ivy and nastya both have been in narration tracks before) and theres also characters they play in the extra songs in the tales to be told volumes

i hope you end up liking them <333 heres a photo of them all together for u

[ID: A group shot of the Mechanisms. End ID]

#this was longer than expected sorry anon ahdjsnd #you activated the autism #answered #anon pog #id from princess-of-purple-prose

[allthemidnightmemories]

my sweeney todd experience

okay so this is a super long post that is packed with spoilers, so if you don't want to be spoiled on any element of the show (staging or plot), do not read on!

for the rest of you: let us attend the tale!

GENERAL THOUGHTS

the crowd was generally pretty respectful and courteous. everyone cheered SO loud during Josh’s opening line to the point where you couldn’t hear him actually say “attend the tale of Sweeney Todd.” (side note: THAT ENTRANCE. THE STAGING. WOW.) There was one weird moment where someone catcalled when Jordan Fisher first entered the stage. But otherwise, aside from a few small whispers from some very excited high schoolers, everyone was very well behaved which was a welcome surprise after hearing of so many crowd behavior nightmares from other nights/shows in general.

speaking of the entrance - josh's entrance as sweeney was incredible. the the sopranos are wailing away and he just FLIES out of this hole and starts singing. MAGIC.

the choreography was definitely interesting and a Choice, but has really grown on me the more I think about it. some of the stuff that the ensemble was doing with their hands felt like a bit much, but I particularly liked how the movement worked with “God, That’s Good!” and “City on Fire”. and by the final ballad I feel like it….made more sense to me? Like after watching the whole musical, the actions seemed to connect more?? I also liked the way the ensemble moved as a group/rhythmically - it almost looked like the inner workings of a factory (or the meatpacking process, or some other sort of mechanized thing) which is super cool in the context of industrial London and a great callback to the original run's factory stage.

Everyone in this cast was amazing. The entire thing was gorgeously sung from start to finish, and I’d venture to guess that this is the prettiest sounding that Sweeney has ever been. if you don't believe me, LISTEN TO THE CAST ALBUM SINGLES. it sounded JUST LIKE THAT. trust me. it's beautiful.

I also loved how well this show blends the comedy and tragedy of it all. With some productions I think there's a tendency to lean into the darkness of it too much, and you lose a bit of the ridiculousness that Sondheim intended, but too much humor and you lose the humanity of the characters. This performance blends this PERFECTLY in my opinion—much funnier than I expected, but still haunting in many ways (especially in act 2).

now, onward to the specifics!

JOSH GROBAN

Josh Groban was OUTSTANDING. (Admittedly, I’m a pretty big fan of his and he was my initial reason for coming to the show, so I’m a bit biased.) I thought his “human Sweeney” approach and playing him as someone who still has a shred of Benjamin Barker left in him was haunting and magnificent to watch.

In so much of the first act, you can just FEEL the tension between him being a human who’s been through hell and back and has lost everything and everyone he’s ever loved, and someone who’s on the verge and ready to snap but isn’t QUITE over the edge yet as his humanity keeps pulling him back—literally.

Even the physicality of the performance (leaning on things and tensing his shoulders, staggering forward or walking like he’s got the weight of the world on his shoulders, hunching over the sink or collapsing around the chair after Judge Turpin leaves after Pretty Women) he just seems so downtrodden and broken by his experience thus far, yet he’s still actively battling his own inner demons—we know he wants revenge, but you still see the human behind the exhausted face, almost as if he knows that revenge is the last thing he has the strength to do.

When he kills Pirelli, I felt like he gets no joy out of doing it and it genuinely pains him, even though it has to be done for his own survival. he even lets out a bit of a sob when the deed is done (props to the lighting department for this moment - the deep red they chose was incredible and the thunder noise was SPOOKY). Even during Pretty Women, he seemed to play it as if he was still warring within himself on whether he’d go through it (my mom interpreted it as him getting swept away in the memory of Lucy, which is probably more correct since vengeance is the only thing he’s after). it’s only after losing his chance to kill the judge and the full weight of that loss falls on him that he fully snaps into ruthless killer, made all the more effective by how we’ve seen him building toward it the whole first act.

Compare this with the sheer ruthlessness of his actions in act two. The Johanna Quartet is SO precise and methodical. The letter writing scene and the scene where he chases Johanna out of the pie shop is someone who’s cruel with ease, who’s let all the goodness leach out of him and be replaced with cold, calculating movement and intention. I also LOVED the way the letter writing scene is staged with Sweeney slouched over in his barber chair lazily waving his hand writing the letter, and the ensemble members on the stairs mimicking him like he's a puppet master - it was creepy and weird and WONDERFUL.

ANNALEIGH ASHFORD

Annaleigh Ashford was incredible. Everyone has rightly pointed out the humor in her performance—her comedic timing was impeccable and she and Josh are such incredible foils for each other, and she similarly is so physical with the role (whether she’s flirting with Sweeney, throwing herself around the pie shop or around him, or rolling around on the floor in fits of laughter). You can see that she’s made a life out of being clever—not in a ruthless way, but in a way where her quirks cover someone who is also constantly trying to survive as a single woman in a society not kind to single women.

But I wasn’t expecting to feel such deep sympathy for her, especially in the second act when everything starts falling apart. You can really feel how desperate she is to protect what little she has, and how torn she really does feel when it comes to her relationship with Toby when he discovers what’s been going on. But her HUMOR. She holds the show on a string and makes it tick, and brings such a physicality to the role that makes it so fun to watch because you don’t know what she’ll do next. It almost feels like a kid who’s trying to keep their crush’s attention—never fully believing that they’re truly loved and always trying to do the most to ensure that they’ve always got SOME reaction, even if it’s an annoyed/exasperated one

OTHER CAST MEMBERS

considering what I had heard, Jordan Fisher was better than I expected. I thought his voice was fine - because he sings with more of a pop style, it didn’t quite meld with everyone else’s more classic Broadway voices in my opinion. But he plays the naïveté, innocence, and sweetness of Anthony well and gave a serviceable performance, and I did believe that he really cared for Johanna and wanted to save her. 

Judge Turpin was suitably slimy as well, though I would’ve loved to see the actor’s take on Mea Culpa, which is unfortunately cut from this production. he’s very obviously despicable, but I just wanted MORE from that particular character because Beadle Bamford has much more to do, and while his role doing the dirty work almost makes him more despicable, his comedic timing was fantastic and he had me cracking up in Parlor Songs.

I was really surprised at how much I was moved by the Johanna/Anthony storyline seeing it staged. elements of it felt comedic (she loves him! and doesn’t even know his name until after several songs together!) but I think seeing the ways the judge has conditioned and tormented her just makes you want to root for her to find SOME kind of happiness, and I thought the two actors brought a glimmer of light that I wasn’t expecting.

The Beggar Woman is a role I’ve had to sit with in the weeks since the show. On its surface it’s such an understated role that just pops in and out of the plot, but Ruthie Ann Miles does such an amazing job of channeling the heartbreak and pain of losing what she’s lost, all while being a human being that's utterly broken and cast aside by all of society. there are layers here to be unpacked, and thinking about Ruthie's own experiences in the context of the Beggar Woman just...makes me so grateful that she's giving the performance that she is.

Gaten was one of the surprise standouts of the evening, both vocally and acting-wise. he brings such a heartbreaking innocence to Toby, and you definitely get the sense that he’s more emotionally abused/starved/neglected and just grasping for any scrap of affection he gets, rather than mentally slow as portrayed in other productions. Not While I’m Around was another song I wasn’t expecting to move me as much as it did—it seems like such a sweet song when you’re listening, but with the staging of it, I really felt the desperation he feels as he’s trying to protect Mrs. Lovett, and how much he’s trying to warn her. When he discovers what’s really happening in the second act, Gaten especially made my heart break for him and how he portrayed the innocence he lost. I’m surprised he didn’t at least get a Tony nod because I was so moved by all of the decisions he made and the approach he took.

Maria Bilbao — the other surprise incredible standout of the evening, playing Johanna. her voice is absolutely gorgeous, and you can visibly see the effects of years of Judge Turpin’s emotional abuse and isolation in all of her tics, nervousness, and her inability to use any sort of social skills with Anthony. Even after her rescue, you can see the damage that's been done, and it’s not far off to guess that she’ll bear the scars of the trauma she’s experienced. Another especially tragic scene was when Sweeney goes to attack her in a blind rage, and you just see her cower before someone who once loved her and made her giggle over breakfast. Even after that scene when she escapes, you can see that the mental scars will last long afterwards, and she’ll be another cog caught in the cycle of vengeance.

Pirelli - While I’m so glad I got to see Josh in the role of Sweeney, Nicholas Christopher’s performance as Pirelli made me SUPER curious to see what he’d be like as Sweeney. He was SO intense in his short time on stage and his acting choices really elevated a character that otherwise could be just another side character on Sweeney's journey to

NOTABLE SCENES/MOMENTS

Pretty Women - this scene is just.....everything. Josh's portrayal of Sweeney on the verge is INCREDIBLE, and there's something so haunting about the contrast of the beautiful music against the tension of what's about to happen.

Epiphany - anyone who ever called Josh Groban a cuddly baritone will be eating their words when they see this. he is simultaneously giving a FLAWLESS vocal performance as he breaks from reality and I still don't have words to explain what this felt like to watch live so i won't even try

Little Priest - Sweeney and Lovett are basically flirting during this entire song—like the whole thing gave the energy of when you find a weird friend who's into the same weird thing you are and you get to freak out about it with them. meanwhile, everyone else is just looking at you like 👀👀👀. BUT ANYWAYS watching them both absolutely losing it and breaking with reality and playing into the utter comedy of it was perfect. (also sidenote - apparently some people think Josh and Annaleigh were breaking character when they sing this, but idk it seemed VERY clear to me that they were still in character when they do their long extended break for laughter??? idk????) all i know is that when the last note of this song hit and the lights went off and then back on again, I turned to my mom and just said "i'm so happy right now" because I just WAS.

By the Sea - WHERE DO I BEGIN. This is SUCH a horny version of this show and this number SHOWS IT. Annaleigh basically just manhandles Josh Groban during an entire song to the point where he seemed very alarmed at everything she was doing and how hard she was throwing herself at him. At some point, Annaleigh managed to have her entire leg wrapped around him and under his leg??? I’m still not even sure what she did there but it was incredible and the whole audience was eating it UP. and josh also wears glasses during this??? it was such a look???

Sweeney/Lovett’s chemistry - no way around this—there is SO much sexual tension between Sweeney and Lovett. So much touching and nudges, hidden whispers between them before the contest scene as they both expose the miracle elixir, even a hug from behind during Wait (I’ve never once envisioned this song as being one where Lovett soothes Sweeney…sensually…but it REALLY worked). At one point, Mrs. Lovett stuck Sweeney’s whole hand down her shirt before the next character (Pirelli?) came in??? For Sweeney, the attraction is very resigned—while other Sweeneys are more dismissive/ignore her, you can tell that he does have a begrudging affection for her, and while he may not love her, there is some element of him that’s glad to have her around, kooky as she is, and he doesn't mind having her in his corner.

A break??? - I’m 90% sure that Josh broke just the tiniest bit in Worst Pies in London - after Lovett gave him the pie and he took a bite and reacted to the gross pie, she just stared at him and I thought I saw him smile just the tiniest bit while he was chewing and. maybe it was supposed to be a grimace, but i SWEAR I saw that man crack 😂

Lighting - the lighting of this show is UNMATCHED and if it doesn’t win the Tony it will have been robbed. The scene where Pirelli is killed, the backlighting during Epiphany, the entire City on Fire sequence—it's all so effective.

the pirelli’s miracle elixir/contest scene is HILARIOUS staged and I don’t think I fully got the humor until seeing it that way. Also Sweeney wears a top hat??? Lovett and Todd are also very conspiratorial in this scene - they're arm and arm, and while Tobias is singing, they both were whispering in each others’ ears before exposing him as a fraud, which further emphasizes the ~tension~ between them.

STAGE DOOR 

this was the part I was most nervous about because I’d heard so many crazy things, but it actually went went so well. My mom and I BOOKED it after bows (even after staying for the Broadway Cares speech lol) and somehow managed to get a spot right next to the barricade (shoutout to the two lovely people who offered to make room for us to stand there!). After what I heard I was expecting insanity, but once again everyone was super respectful and calm. Gaten, Maria, Josh, Annaleigh, Jamie, and two ensemble members came out to sign, and were all very kind and lovely. (Definitely tried not to pass out when Josh signed my playbill—I wish I would have been wittier and more clever but I’m just happy that I got to tell him he was amazing in the role BECAUSE HE WAS. Jamie Jackson was especially kind and even chatted a bit about how much he loves the show and enjoys doing it every night, and mentioned how much he had enjoyed watching a rehearsal earlier that day). Obviously the experience probably varies from crowd to crowd, but overall, I’m SO glad I stuck around and did it. 

there's SO much more I could say, and I might have to do another post when i find an *ahem* ~alternative~ method to watch again—I might even do a song-by-song breakdown of each scene even further because there's SO MUCH TO SAY.

while i don't know if this will beat Parade in the revival categories where the two shows are pitted against each other, I really hope it gets a few nods. but the house was packed and it was selling well, so regardless of critical acclaim, this show does EXACTLY what it needs to and I absolutely loved it.

#sweeney todd #sweeney todd revival #josh groban #annaleigh ashford #might mess around and make a part two later!!!

[bonny-kookoo]

pls look at this. so precious 😭 instagram (.) com/reel/ChxBtNlMKWZ/?igshid=MDJmNzVkMjY= i know you could create an au inspired on this video

Challenge accepted. This was way too cute.

In which you save a young man's career, and find a new friend in exchange.

Tags/Warnings: slight angst in the beginning, wild hybrid!reader, struggling photographer!Jungkook, strangers to friends?, fluff

✽.｡.:*・ﾟ ✽.｡.:*・ﾟ ✽.｡.:*・ﾟ ✽.｡.:*・ﾟ ✽.｡.:*✽.｡.:*・ﾟ ✽.｡.:*

He's yet again walking around at the crack of dawn- grass wet, air cool, but not too cold. It's a little foggy, but not too much- perfect conditions for nice shots.

His last shots.

He knows he should've listened to his father back when he'd left travel, to become someone who's successfully with art rather than a conventional job- he should've known better than to just dive in head first without any backup plan. Now, after three long years of struggling to find footing, he's officially forced to give up. There's no way he can continue his craft as a job any longer.

Maybe he's just.. Not talented.

The warm golden glow over the fields feels nice, warms him up a little, as he carelessly sits down- lays down, to get a better angle at the scenery in front of him. The woods are finally waking up, slowly so- continuing on, unknown of the struggles and changes he himself is going to face. It reminds him that the world moves on no matter what happens. That there's always a morning after.

Maybe giving up won't be so bad.

Or at least he hopes so, as he wipes his nose on his sleeve, blinking away the stinging tears as he focuses again to capture a proper shot.

Until he hears it.

Tiny noises, careful and a little shy. When he looks a little to the side, there you are. He spots your large dark ears directed at him, curious eyes staring right at where he's laying. His lips are parted a little in awe, eyes wide open, sadness suddenly pushed to the side as he looks at you. You sit down, still watching him, occasionally looking towards a flock of birds flying out, before your attention is back on him.

You're a hybrid- he knows the subtle differences between full animals and hybrids by now, having always been fascinated by famous photography albums done by numerous well known photographers around the world. Wild hybrids are rare these days- the government always keen on 'integrating them into society' as they claim- though Jungkook doesn't like that. He's a member of the free paw movement- he believes that wild hybrids should have the choice whether or not to live in the towns and cities or stay where they are.

He carefully adjusts his leg, and you get up at that, taking a few steps back- before you sniff around, walking to the side, a small part of a circle around him. He smiles, giddy with the excitement of your interest in him, as he slowly, carefully makes sure to turn off any audio feedback of his camera before he takes a shot. He takes another, when you tilt your head at the mechanical sound of the shutter- and he quietly chuckles to himself, exhaling through his nose before it scrunches up when he takes a look at the shot he's taken.

It continues for far longer than he'd initially planned on staying- with you coming closer and closer, before you just-

Flop down.

You're laying down, right there, right next to him.

And he feels the tears again, because how can something like this happen to someone like him? He's not able to capture any of this properly enough to keep the memory forever like all those world renowned photographers can. It's a wasted moment- but he pulls himself together, laying down next to you.

The photos he takes are of you, just freely enjoying the warming morning sun right next to him. Quietly, your eyes closed, body comfortable and relaxed.

And then, he puts the camera away, because maybe, for once, he should exist in the moment instead of trying to catch it.

And as soon as he sits up, zips the camera bag closed, he assumes you've run away- but you're suddenly right there- sniffing at his clothes, before you sit down, looking at him. "you should be more careful." he says quietly, as about as he can- and you just stare at him. "must be nice, living like this." he smiles, and you lay down close to him, rolling up into a ball, back pressed firmly against his thigh, your bodyheat warming up his skin underneath his cargo pants.

He waves at you once he drives back home, showers there, uploads the photos as a set to some of the websites he frequents with his art, before he goes to bed. He didn't edit any of them this time. He didn't carefully choose and crop, he didn't specifically name any of them something well thought out. He just named the set 'Dawn', and left it at that, before he went to sleep.

Unknowing that while he's dreaming of nothing, the world finally takes notice of him and his talent.

While you're in the woods, dreaming of the boy with the camera.

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #hybrid imagine

[rocksanddeadflowers]

hello, mechanisms enjoyer. who is your favourite mechanism. what is your favourite album. what is your favourite song. do you have a favourite mechanisms photo.

Oh!!! The mechs ask person!!! Hello!!! Yay I like answering questions that let me ramble thank you

It's literally impossible for me to pick a favorite anything but for the mechs specifically I think I have a special soft spot for Brian and Jonny, as well as the prison mechs. I will honestly obsess over one at random just rotating them BUT I find Brian and Ivy relatable and stupidly loveable. Raphaella's vocal range is very similar to mine and I'm always down with mad scientist types. Marius is just so fun to write and he's just like,,,,, idk he's got such a fun demeanor. Jonny memorizes and recites large pieces of script in a way I can relate to (because autism) but mainly aside from his overall Jonny-ness, it's the New Texas thing. I grew up in Texas and I like projecting a lot of southern culture onto to, mostly the cool stuff that makes me homesick (which is also why I love Lyfrassir bc I can project a lot of my Norse Mythology info and pagan lifestyle onto them, but they're not technically a mech so)

Clearly my favorite album is The Bifrost Incident, mainly because Norse Mythology was one of my biggest special interests for years (it still is btw I'm just not as deep anymore). Also after the disappointment of the Loki series, getting into The Mechanisms was just awesome. I will say tho that even if TBI is objectively my favorite, I listen to HNOC the most lmao.

Very hard to pick a favorite song bc I'm obsessed with like .... almost all of them. So my 'favorite' isn't necessarily which song I think is the best, but it's Rose Red. I have many feelings about that song. OUAT(IS) was my first album (literally at that point my only info about The Mechs was someone's post about "Jonny Sim's - you know the TMA guy - stupid and embarrassing uni band" so here i was looking for a giggle actually) i was laying in bed in the middle of the night listening. IMMEDIATELY enraptured by it (it's not stupid and embarrassing how did that person come to the conclusion is this because I'm a theatre kid) and the gasp I let out at Rose Red!! Because most of the songs I didn't really recognize except Pump Shanty really, but Rose Red was a song close to my heart!! It was an old choir warm up, and one of my favorites bc it was the only one we did that wasn't silly and dumb, but straight up sounded ethereal man!! It was just super nostalgic. So after King Cole that song went on loop for a while. Cut to months later when I finally listened to DTTM, yeah anyway that version made me cry. Lot of feels <3

I have many favorite pics!!!! I posted one of my favorite Brian pics ever somewhere on my Tumblr but here's a couple pics I've been rotating a lot recently:

Also here's the favorite Brian pic

Think about him a lot <3

#thanks for asking i ramble a lot this is an excuse!!! #the mechanisms

[holeynightsky]

overthinking albums: midnights pt. 1

welcome back, lovelies! today's Long Rant is brought to you by all the beautiful RWBY art i've been seeing as we get hyped about vol9.

today, we'll be thinking way too hard about the lyrics and general vibe checks of taylor swift's midnights album, and how each song was specifically written with a RWBY character/relationship/arc in mind. this is going to be split into two parts, because i, ahem, hit the character limit for a text block post on tumblr.

(what's that? sorry, i can't hear you, but if you're suggesting the album was not in fact written about a niche animated show, i'm replying with shhhhhhhhh.)

the album can be found here on spotify, if you're interested in listening along.

lavender haze - okay guys we gotta start with a bumbleby song. and this one--whoo boy. are you kidding? hell yeah! you don't really read into / my melancholia.... i just wanna stay in that / lavender haze. i mean come on. can't you just see blake singing about yang? staring into her eyes? the epitome of sapphic love??? also, obsessed with the way adam didn't scare yang off in conjunction with the line they're bringing up my history / but you weren't even listening. i know it's not a one-for-one match but i'm gonna die on that hill.

maroon - bear with me for this pain, but: a jaune-grieving-pyrrha song. the visual of the two of them over time, all those shades of red... the tension just before and during the vytal festival arc (how the hell did we lose sight of us again? / sobbing with your head in your hands / ain't that the way shit always ends).... jaune in the forest during vol4 (and i wake with your memory over me / that's a real fuckin' legacy)... him standing in front of her statue, finally putting his ghosts to rest (the rust that grew between telephones / the lips i used to call home / so scarlet it was maroon)

anti-hero - a hot take, but i feel like this is a song for oz/oscar/ozma. i have this thing where i get older but just never wiser is him struggling under the weight of everything he knows and all the ways he's fucking it up anyway. not to mention this whole thing: i end up in crises / tale as old as time / i wake up screaming from dreaming / one day i'll watch as you're leaving / 'cause you got tired of my scheming / for the last time. i--i don't even think i need to explain this one? are we good to move on?

snow on the beach - a qrow/clover song. you might think this is qrow thinking about clover, because of lines like you wanting me / tonight feels impossible--but ohoho, slow down there my friend. i will die on my headcanon hill that clover was just as traumatized as qrow, just with different coping mechanisms, and that he was absolutely whipped within hours of meeting him. plus, qrow just deserves at least one (1) nice thing--and don't you want to see him getting all flustered and happy when someone else looks at him and thinks of the lines i searched 'aurora borealis green' / i've never seen / someone lit from within / blurring out my periphery? akjsdbfkasjfh and the pause after can this be a real thing, can it? with their hands gently brushing.... hello? my heart?

you're on your own, kid - yang. yang alllllll the way. am i maybe projecting the oldest-female-child-syndrome? yep. but i mean--oh my god how could it not be??? i didn't choose this town / i dream of getting out / there's just one who could make me stay doesn't have to be romantic. that can be her thinking of ruby. my friends from home don't know what to say / i looked around in a blood-soaked gown / and i saw something they can't take away is living at the dorms in vale and leading up to the fall of beacon, 'cause there were pages turned with the bridges burned / everything you lose is a step you take is her recovering her confidence in vols 4 & 5. you're on your own, kid / yeah, you can face this / you're on your own, kid / you always have been is that moment where she steps past raven and ventures into the spring portal alone...... i'm simply not okay.

midnight rain - raven and ty. we were all thinking it, right? i mean. i mean. how could it be anything else? my town was a wasteland / ... / my boy was a montage / a slow-motion, love potion / ... / i broke his heart 'cause he was nice. the way she left but didn't feel guilt that we really see at any point in the show? he wanted it comfortable / i wanted that pain / he wanted a bride / i was making my own name pretty much sums up that dynamic. ty is a himbo and i love him but as soon as we met raven i was like "oh, obviously that wasn't gonna work." also, i peered through a window / a deep portal, time travel / all the love we unravel / and the life i gave away is so perfectly on the nose it's not even funny.

question...? - blake and ilia!! blake! and! ilia! specifically, ilia being bitter as she watches blake move through various relationships with various levels of health, and never once look at her. good girl, sad boy / big city, wrong choices / we had one thing going on / i swear that it was something / 'cause i don't remember who i was before you. or, or!! she was on your mind / with some dickhead guy / ... / it was one drink after a another / fucking politics and gender roles / and you're not sure and i don't know / got swept away in the gray. i simply cannot. i shall pass away before i ever make my peace with this level of pining.

stay tuned for part two, coming soon! <3

#taylor swift #midnights #taylor swift midnights #rwby bumbleby #rwby #yang xiao long #lyric musings #lyric analysis #overthinking albums

[theirnameissam]

Pillars of my Journey #1: BANKS, The Altar

Anyone who knows me knows how much Banks means to me, probably because I can never stop unapologetically fangirling her whenever I can. To me, Banks is the best kept secret in music, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. The impact she and this album had on my life is not something that I can even really try to start to sum up with just a few words and pictures, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to try.

Banks second album, The Altar, altered my life in many ways, and has stayed with me on my journey of getting to know myself and accepting myself ever since it first entered my life all those years ago in 2016. To this day it is one of the centerpieces of my life in many ways.

I’m not quite sure what it is about Banks that made her able to pierce through the masc facade bubble that I was living in, but I am so glad she did. Gemini Feed sure might have helped, it’s a song that can turn anyone into a believer, but for me, it was the first time since repressing that part of myself at the start of puberty that I was fine with letting myself listen to music that would be considered ‘too girly’.

My Banks fandom grew fast as I listened to the album again and again, and I went to her tour that year for the album. It was one of the most profound moments in my life where I was confronted with myself, gender-concepts, and the fact that I was living a lie. As I was fangirling Banks at her concert, a girl called me out and started to make fun of me, because how could someone that looked the way I did be having the time of their live at this woman's concert? It’s a moment that I look back on with a lot of duality, because in essence, she had a point, and yet it’s that exact fucking stupid gender boxed thinking that actually kept me from living the life I wanted to live all of my life. That, and of course various other layers of transphobia. It was a clear example of the thing that I have experienced over and over again for the first 25 years of my life, that my cis privilege was not something I ever felt to be a privilege, it was a prison, a coping mechanism that allowed me to run away from myself and constantly leave situations feeling like I hadn’t taken my space or compromised myself.

When I did start to accept who I was, this album became so much more layered and spoke to me on so many more levels. The song Weaker Girl is now an anthem to my existence. That moment when you can finally get over your own transphobia and stand in your own energy is so groundbreaking, to let go of the prejudice and just let yourself exist is truly a feeling like no other. To feel pride for your existence and who you are, the growth you made and who you’ve become despite all the fucking hardship. I used to pretend to be really tough as a shitty coping mechanism for trying to compensate for who I wasn’t, but the person I am now, they are actually tough, although I would much prefer to use the word resilient. When Banks sings ‘I need a bad motherfucker like me’ that always hits me really deep, because life, especially choosing to live life on your own terms, and not a life lived out of fear, sometimes requires you to channel that fierce energy inside of you, and that’s one of the many things I like about this song.

But Fuck With Myself also has a very special place in my heart, because of the dual meaning of the song, and how relatable that is to my own life. With the title, Banks means that she ‘fucks with herself’ as in that she rocks with herself, or that she has her own back, but she also means the other interpretation of the word, to ‘fuck with yourself’ as in to mess with yourself. I think it’s so clever to put these two together, but more than it just being a smart play on words, it’s something that I often find myself struggling with. Sometimes I’m my own worst enemy, and sometimes I’m my own best friend, and the beauty in it in my opinion is to be able to still be there for yourself when you are your own worst enemy, when you are messing up your own opportunities and chances at happiness, because it’s only by taking ownership of those moments in life that you can also take ownership of the growth you make, the challenges you overcome, the wounds you heal, the milestones you couldn’t even fucking imagine being possible to be reached being reached. That starts with unconditionally fucking with yourself more than anybody else, even if you do also fuck with yourself more than anybody else does.

The words she sings on Trainwreck often echo through my mind, ‘they told me you were never gonna let me get away’, to me that was referring to this prison that I had built for myself in which I lived, that I genuinely thought was the only right thing to do, because I really believed that my life would be invalidated and dehumanized if I lived the life I wanted to live. Which is obviously a very sad and depressing thing to acknowledge, but I think we often forget the impact that the societal treatment of queer, trans, and in other ways diverse people has on the brain of a child. But thanks to Banks I slowly did start getting away. I no longer saw my own femininity as something to be ashamed of, but rather as something to be proud of. Seeing her embracing and being proud of her own physical flaws, as she sings on this album, gave me the courage to start dealing with my shame about my body, that my femininity isn’t defined by how broad my fucking shoulders are. So I broke away more. I saw her rocking this cute moody vibe of a leather jacket and dark eye makeup and I went and bought myself a leather jacket and eyeliner. And sure, I can’t dance or look as good as Banks no matter how hard I try, but I felt carefree, and cute. By empowering herself, she also empowered another human being, and I think that is one of the most awesome things a person can ever do. And to some I’ll always just always be a boy with makeup on, or a dress on, or a fake woman with a dick, but people that think those things clearly don’t understand one very important aspect of the trans experience, and that is the human one. All those things I just said are things I have mostly been told by my own brain, by my own internalized transphobia and trauma and shame. But Banks helped me realize a really powerful thing. I’m not claiming anyone else’s space. The only person whose space I’m claiming is my own. The space I never claimed for the first quarter-century of my life. So I’m extremely grateful to Banks for coming into my life, for being a part of my journey, and for being able to reach someone that needed to hear those words of love and self-empowerment so much. Thank you forever.

P.S

One tiny detail I love about this album is that the CD version of the album has a short a cappella piano intro to Gemini Feed to start the album off, it’s such a lovely touch.

#lgbtq #trans #transfem #trans stuff #queer stuff #hernameisbanks #pillarsofmyjourney #personalessay

[keanureevesisbae]

I was thinking abt sy with a lil idol gf and omg🥺🥺Bye he’d be so supportive🥰he would go to his gf’s shows and maybe even surprise his idol gf at a fansign and bring 20 albums for her to sign😭😭 the big bear definitely owns a bunch of merch and has a “secret” fan acc, He is overall just mushy for his girlie😩🤚(I’m so soft rn pls😭)

YOU JUST MADE ME THE SOFTEST HUMAN BEING ALIVE. OH MY GOSH, THIS IS ADORABLE, I LOVE THIS AND THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR PUTTING THIS IDEA IN MY MIND!! (side note: i used Jennie's Solo cover for the art and i also went out of my way to make insta edits - yes, i'm that type of person) also, thank you sweet anon for sending me this 💗hope you like it

Captain Syverson x petite!cutesy!fem!reader

Summary: Sy has a reputation: a strong and powerful captain, who is never afraid and will never turn into a pile of mush. However, there is only one woman who is able to turn him into the ultimate fanboy.

Wordcount: 1k

Warnings: none

Sy is more of a country music kinda man. Growing up in Texas, near a bar with a mechanic bull, he was obsessed as a young teen with the idea of just touring through the state with a cowboy hat on his head and a guitar.

It’s just the fact that he can’t sing what stood in the way of a very promising country career.

He joined the military and forgot about the idea all together, but when he came back from his final tour to Iraq, his friends took him on a little welcome home drive through the country. They visited all sorts of bars, listened to all sorts of music there. Sure, all sorts of music had its appeal, but it would never be like country.

The final destination of the little road trip was LA and they went to a bar for new sing and songwriters to perform.

And that’s where he first laid his eyes on you. He remembers you sitting on a bar stool, back straight as a ruler. You were adorable, he thought to himself. Wide eyes as you were watching the stage, clapping your hands along with the beat and squealing when someone sang something particularly well.

And then it was your turn to get on stage. A sweet pink dress, matched with white sneakers and socks with a lace border. Nothing about the song you wrote and sang was something he usually liked. Very happy, up beat and your high voice sang every note perfectly.

Despite not his taste, he adored every second of it.

You seemed shy off stage, with the way you sat by yourself, but on stage that demeanor completely changed.

You were born to be a singer.

When you sat down at your own barstool again, he grabbed his beer and decided to sit next to you, get to know you. Everything about you was different. Petite, long hair and your feet didn’t even touch the floor.

He was supposed to stay in LA for two weeks, but that changed into a month and then two months, because he couldn’t get enough of you. He left Texas (something he never thought he would do) and moved to LA, where he got a job as a constructor. You quit your own job, one you only took to be able to pay for the bills and musical equipments. He loved helping you out, driving you from bar to bar, hoping your dream of becoming an idol would come true.

And one day, it happened.

You got an offer of one of the biggest agencies in the US and after the two of you read the contract multiple times, you signed and were an official idol.

Life changed a lot after that. You were either in the studio, dance practice and back at the studio again, however Sy made sure that you were well hydrated and fed, just like your back up dancers.

The people at the agency loved Sy and they often joked that he was part of the family that was created at the agency.

It all happened fast. Your first single, music video, first appearance at multiple late night shows and finally you reached one million followers on Instagram.

And he was right by your side.

His friends knew about his love for country, but they also knew about his much bigger love for you. They often would catch the big captain sing to the cute, almost bubblegum pop music you produced.

He didn’t care.

Sy had all your merchandise, whether it would fit him or not. He had your albums (all signed of course) and listened to them when you weren’t around. Sometimes he’d travel with you as you were touring, sometimes he stayed behind, especially after the two of you adopted a two year old American Akita.

The world knew you weren’t single, but you always kept Sy out of the spotlight, something he’d greatly appreciated. While you were born to be famous, he was born to live a more anonymous.

But that didn’t stop you from boasting about him on Instagram.

It had been at least three months since you saw him in real life. Your manager and all your back up dancers knew about his plan. Heck, they even helped Sy with planning it. He watches from the back, the line at your meet and greet stand growing smaller and smaller, until everyone has left. You let out a content sigh and want to get up, but your manager says there is a special fan still waiting in the back.

‘Really?’ you ask him. ‘Who is it?’

‘Very special. Super fan.’

That gains your attention, as your eyebrows are raised. ‘Do I know them?’

‘You’ve met them before,’ your manager says.

‘Oh, I do hope I recognize them,’ you say. ‘I don’t want to come across as such a bitch, you know.’

Your manager starts to laugh. ‘I wouldn’t worry about it,’ he says. ‘Close your eyes.’

You place your hands over your eyes and smile in anticipation. Sy quietly walks over to your table and places his newly bought album in front of you. ‘I’d like this signed, please,’ he says.

Within lightening speed you pull your hands from your eyes. ‘Oh my,’ you say, ‘Sy?’ You jump up, your chair falling behind you. You run around the table and wrap your arms around his neck. He lifts you up in his arms and gives you a kiss on your cheek. ‘I missed you! What are you doing here? How is Kal?’

‘Kal is good. He is with your parents.’

‘But what are you doing here?’ you ask.

‘I want my autograph,’ he says with a chuckle.

You press a kiss on his lips. ‘How long are you gonna stay here with me?’

He shrugs. ‘I brought enough clothing for let’s say… a month?’

Your eyes enlarge. ‘That’s the end of my tour! Oh, Sy, you’re staying with me?’ You have tears in your eyes and whisper: ‘I love you.’

‘I love you too, little lady.’

#captain syverson #captain syverson drabble #captain syverson x reader #captain syverson x idol!reader #sy and his idol gf

[iknewyoudunderstand]

Aaron woke up to a clattering in the kitchen. His brain caught up with his body when he was crouched at the gun safe tucked away next to his bureau, his sleep-addled fingers somehow maneuvering the combination lock—ten, oh-seven, thirty-four. Spencer had complimented him on it when figuring it out had taken him longer than ten seconds, because while using his son’s birthday was expected, what wasn’t was the division of his favorite album’s release date, and that would prevent potential attackers from— 

Spencer. Where was Spencer?

Glock in hand, finally, Aaron spun around but the bed was empty and the bathroom dark. Spencer’s revolver was still in the safe, and try as he might but Aaron just couldn’t remember if he had fallen asleep before Spencer had come upstairs or not. Spencer was a much heavier sleeper than he was, and if there was someone in the house and Spencer was downstairs…

On silent feet, Aaron crept through the upstairs, clearing each room. He didn’t have a flashlight on him, so he was forced to let his eyes adjust to the darkness, to keep his back to the wall, and to keep his finger on the trigger just in case someone jumped out at him from behind a door or a chest of drawers. His room, Jack’s unoccupied room, the upstairs bathroom… as he came down the stairs he noticed that there was a light coming from the kitchen.

He lifted his gun again and turned the corner to see Spencer, leaning against the counter with a jar of baby food in his hand and a spoon in his mouth.

“What the fuck?” Aaron asked. Spencer jumped at the sight of the gun, and Aaron clicked the safety back on. “What are you doing?”

“An experiment,” he said around the spoon.

Aaron suddenly felt very tired. He glanced at the digital clock on the oven. 3:23 AM. “Why?”

“Um.” Spencer set the jar of baby food down on the counter, and then the spoon. “Necessity?”

“Spencer.”

“I was hungry,” Spencer said. “And it was too late to make something.”

“Spencer.”

“So I had to go looking in the cabinets.”

“Not in the pantry?”

“As a result, I found the baby food.”

“It’s been there for at least a year. Did you check if it was expired?”

“My hypothesis was in regards to whether or not expired baby food was still going to be good.”

Aaron sighed. “And?”

“My conclusion is that it is palatable, but probably not something I should incorporate into my regular diet.”

“You mean you won’t be replacing your diet of coffee and saltine crackers with pureed peas and carrots?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Spencer cracked a grin and the sight of it dissolved all of his building exasperation. “I’m sorry I woke you up.”

“It’s fine,” Aaron said. He moved closer to Spencer and set his gun on the counter. “But you could’ve just told me you were going to make something. You know I don’t mind.”

“Do I?”

“Don’t you?” Spencer shrugged. “Spencer, you live here. I told you when you moved in that I wasn’t going to try and change your habits; they’re not disruptive.”

“They’re decidedly disruptive, Aaron. They’re the definition of disruptive,” Spencer said.

“Don’t be stubborn.”

“I’m sorry I woke you up,” he repeated. “It won’t happen again.”

“It will probably happen again.” Aaron reached out and grabbed one of Spencer’s hands so he’d stop wringing them. Gently, because he knew Spencer was still getting used to casual displays of affection, he lifted his knuckles to his mouth and pressed a soft kiss across them. Spencer lit up red. “But it’s okay. We’re FBI agents. At least one of us has to be the light sleeper.”

He snorted. “It doesn’t help that I’m an insomniac.”

“Life goes on.” Aaron fought a yawn. “I’m going back to bed, okay? Just make something if you’re hungry; you can throw away all that baby food when you’re done with your ‘experiment.’” He made air quotes around the word.

“It’s science, Aaron,” Spencer said. “I know you don’t understand it because you don’t have a doctorate in chemistry—“

“You are so lucky I love you,” Aaron said with a scoff. He looked down to grab his gun, and when he looked back up, Spencer was frozen completely, his eyes wide and his bottom lip trembling a bit. He looked like someone had just told him his dog died.

Or, his brain that was still heavy with sleep supplied, like someone had told him they loved him for the first time.

“Sorry,” Aaron said quickly. “I didn’t mean… well, yes, I meant it, but I didn’t mean to say it now… honestly, I was hoping for a situation that was more romantic—“

“I’m sorry, this isn’t the romantic occasion you were looking for?” Spencer joked, a little bit of color coming back to his face. Spencer away from work was a smart-mouthed son of a bitch, and Aaron recognized it as a sort of defense mechanism—a sense of normalcy.

“Not really.” He returned Spencer’s wry smile with a dimple-bearing grin and received a light shove on the shoulder for his troubles, and a muttered ‘jerk.’

Aaron knew they weren’t going to talk about it. There wasn’t going to be a conversation about the logistics of a romantic connection between a superior and a subordinate, because they were already in too deep for a 3 AM feelings powwow to make any difference. They lived in the same house, they slept in the same bed. The only thing missing was the verbal affirmation, the thing that would tell the other, yes, I am in it for the long run.

He supposed neither of them had been looking for a promise because promises eventually got broken. Aaron learned that with Haley, and he didn’t want Spencer to have to learn it first hand—but he knew anyway because no matter how they got into this job, into this field, there was always trauma in the background. Neither of them wanted to get hurt or hurt the other, so the nonverbal agreement had been formed. Maybe if they didn’t say it out loud, the eventual dissolution wouldn’t hurt as much.

And Aaron had just ruined all that because he was caught off guard. It was uncharacteristic as it got—he was Aaron Hotchner, he was never caught off guard—but the easiest way to ruin something was by sticking your own foot in it.

“It’s not a big deal,” Spencer said, looking like he’d just heard Aaron’s entire thought process out loud. Or he had probably had the same one. “I mean… you mean it, right?”

“Yeah,” Aaron said. “I do.”

Spencer stepped in close and caught his lips in a kiss, and it was relatively romantic for all of five seconds, especially in the way that his long fingers caught the skin in between his boxer briefs and his worn academy t-shirt that had become his pajamas, but then the taste made Aaron recoil.

“How did you palate that?” he asked, wiping the back of his hand across his mouth. “All that sugar in your coffee is ruining your taste buds.”

“Maybe.” But Spencer was laughing, even as he stuck the spoon in the sink and dropped the baby food in the trash—thank God, Aaron didn’t know if he wanted that disgusting stuff in his house anymore. He’d call Jack in the morning and apologize for making him eat that liquid garbage. “You should go back to bed.”

“You should come with me.”

“I need to finish what I was doing,” he said with a sigh. “This professor is killing me with these papers.”

“He most likely knows that you’re smarter than him and feels intimidated, so he’s lashing out at you,” Aaron said, feigning wiseness. “Probably had some sort of complex when he was a kid.”

“Oedipus,” Spencer said. “You’re lucky you don’t have to sit through his lectures. I thought I was done with Freud when I finished my BA…”

“And that’s my cue to go to bed before I have to listen to another rant.”

“They’re well deserved.”

“Good night, Spencer.”

“Good night, Aaron,” Spencer said, and Aaron turned to leave the kitchen.

He couldn’t tell if it was his imagination when he heard a soft, “I love you, too,” but he didn’t want to check. Life with Spencer Reid was wonderful, and incredible, and all the other adjectives this crazy relationship between them deserved, but it was fragile. They both were.

Besides, he didn’t need to hear those words, because they only encouraged him—and he didn’t need to be thinking about a recreation of this scene in a world where life was more stable, and society was more accepting, and there was another child in his life and Spencer had another opportunity to eat baby food, even though the whole thought made his heart slam against his ribcage and a grin break out across his face.

They had work in the morning, and he didn’t need to be up all night dreaming about the future, because he was perfectly content to just let it come.

#hotchreid #heid #cm fic #criminal minds fic #aaron hotchner/spencer reid #aaron hotchner x spencer reid #when did i write this? three years ago? #did i run this through my editing program? no #am i on my phone at work desperate for validation? yes #hope u enjoy baby food

[taetaesbaebaepsae]

Break My Heart (myg)

Summary: It’s over, and both you and Yoongi think about the past.

A/N: Thanks to @taegularities and @casuallyimagining​ for betaing this for me!

Warnings: angst, alcohol used as a coping mechanism, some making out and nipple play but this is mostly sad

Rating: Mature

Genre: Angst

Word Count: 5221

You try to push past him, but he throws you over his shoulder and you don’t even fight him, let him take you to the bed. His eyes are wet and his hands are soft on your skin.

“Don’t,” he starts, but you’re not listening. You’ve listened too much over the last year.

“Yoongi.”

He makes a whine in the back of his throat, hides his face in your neck. Your hands come up to rub his back - it’s like a reflex - before you push him off, head toward the door.

He won’t follow you. He never does.

You’re wrong, though. You’re wrong about so many things. He follows you into the hallway, into the elevator, keeps the door open with one foot while you try to shove him back out into the hallway. Finally, you end up fuming at the back of the elevator, arms crossed over your chest, glaring at him.

Yoongi’s trembling, you can see his hand shaking as he holds it out to you. He says your name, his voice hoarse and quiet.

“You wanna break my heart?

Your breath hitches in your chest as you’re catapulted back a year, two years, 5 years. You can see yourself then, your hair shorter and blonder, his hair darker. He was skinnier, then. Hell, so were you.

You were sitting on a curb, half crying and all drunk after a night out, trying to forget a recent breakup, when Yoongi sat down next to you, offered you what at first you thought was a handkerchief, but what ended up being a simple bar napkin.

“Hey,” he said softly, giving you a crooked smile and a tilt of his head. “Don’t cry. You wanna break my heart?”

It started so innocently, you and Yoongi. You were friends first, best friends even. He sat next to you on that curb, rubbed your back until you stopped crying, and you explained the whole situation to him, barely registering that he’d draped his jacket over your shoulders. He didn’t speak, just listened and nodded in the right moments, and when you were done, your cheeks hot from embarrassment of spilling out everything in your mind, he made this little hum in the back of his throat.

“So you need something to get him off your back,” he said thoughtfully.

You looked at him for a moment, stunned. “Uh, yeah. I guess.”

Your ex had been relentless in his pursuit to get you to talk to him after he’d cheated on you, and you were well and truly not interested. That night, you’d been sure you’d be free of him because he’d always been the type to go away for spring break, but he’d been there after all, chasing you around the clubs downtown. 

Yoongi (you remembered his name, he’d told you as soon as he’d sat down and introduced himself while you were crying), hummed again.

“I have an idea.”

You raised an eyebrow.

“Trust me,” he said, and gave you this open, gummy smile.

You did trust him, somehow, even though you didn’t know why. He leaned in close, whispered his plan in your ear, and even though it sent a shock down your spine, you nodded. Maybe you were drunk. Maybe you were just being curious. Either way, it started this thing. Started this slide, like a mudslide down the longest mountain.

You jumped in, with your eyes wide open, trusted him from the jump, and maybe you’d been wrong. Maybe you’d been wrong about a lot of things.

You were 20 when Yoongi had leaned in closer, just below your dangling earring, and planted the softest, most open kiss on your neck. Goosebumps pimpled your flesh, but you didn’t move, in fact, tilted your head to give him better access.

Seconds passed before he swept your hair from your shoulder, his fingertips brushing your skin, and you let out a breath with a little whine. He murmured something when he kissed you there again, this time sucking at your skin, almost roughly.

“Pretty,” you think it was what he said, but as important as that moment was, with all the things it started, that part was fuzzy because your head spun at the softness of his lips on your skin, the sting when he’d marked you there.

“There,” Yoongi said, still half mumbling, and you wondered how much he’d drunk.

His eyes were clear and warm when you looked at him, though, although his cheeks were dusted rose. 

“Uh, th-thank you,” you muttered, feeling small and embarrassed now after it was over.

Yoongi gave you that gummy smile again, and you felt better almost instantly. 

You didn’t know it then, but Yoongi always had that effect on you...until he didn’t. Until he wouldn’t quite meet your eyes. Until you stopped counting the hours he spent away from the bed you shared. Until it was over.

Yoongi stands next to your car, hands on your hood, tears streaming down his face and his eyes pleading with you. But you block it out, look straight ahead, start the car and rev the engine until he moves.

At first, you’re not quite sure he will, but finally he steps back, shoulders slumped, defeated. You manage not to cry, at least not until you’ve pulled over on the interstate, cars whooshing by you as you cover your face.

It isn’t as if you hadn’t tried.

You know how important Yoongi’s music is to him, you know he’s been working on getting an album produced and you’re proud of him, you really are, but...

But: you have barely seen his face in three months. But: you keep sleeping on one side of the bed because it’s cold on his side. But: you fucking miss him. 

You want to talk to him about it, but how can you? How can you when you know this is everything to him? Even when you’d been kids in college, he’d dreamed of producing an album and this opportunity hadn’t just dropped in his lap, he’d worked for it. You’re supposed to be supportive, but all you can do is wonder how long it will be before you see his gummy smile again.

But: when he is home, he’s barely there, drinking too much coffee or scotch, depending on the time of day, barely looking at you, barely talking to you, grunting at you in response, mechanically eating the dinner you’d prepare.

One night, you’d push back from the table, frustrated, and it’d hit the counter with a thud.

Yoongi had looked up from his food, blinked at you as if he was waking from a dream.

“Y/n? Are you okay?”

“No,” you’d answered. “I’m not.”

You’d stormed off to the bedroom, and he hadn’t followed you. Hours later, he’d slid into bed next to you, his lips on your neck, the same spot he’d kissed that first night. 

“I’m sorry,” he’d mumbled against your skin, words slurred around the edges just like the night you'd met.

You could smell the red wine he liked at dinner on his breath when you turned, and they’d been on the tip of your tongue, the words. 

"What's wrong?" you’d wanted to ask. "Is it me?" 

That las thought had kept you from speaking, allowed those words to die in your throat as you’d looped your arms around his neck, tasted the red wine on his tongue.

Because: what if it was something big, something you couldn’t fix? Because: what if it was you? What would you’ve done, then? 

After the night outside the club, after Yoongi's mouth on your throat, you woke up the next morning and thumbed the mark he'd left while looking in the mirror.

Thinking about it  made your face heat and it got worse when you saw him on campus, big gummy smile and looking a lot less hungover than you, his bleached bangs in his face. 

"Hey, you," he said in this low voice, and you couldn’t help smiling back.

It went on like that, you and Yoongi, for months, and then a year, and then eighteen months. He walked you to most of your classes, bought you lunch, once or twice made you laugh so hard you'd snorted banana milk out of your nose. Things became easy with him, and it was so much like a friendship that you barely noticed when you began to fall in love with him.

Falling was easy, but gradual. By the time you realized it, he was graduating and you were a junior and you had no fucking idea what to do about it. You stood at the corner of his best friend's apartment, where there was booze and balloons and about 20 people, and sipped some foul smelling punch that someone had handed you, and looked for him.

You wondered how often you'd done this, looked for him in a crowd, felt your heart swell inside your chest when you found him, when he broke into that familiar gummy smile. You wondered how long you'd been in love and not known it, when he suddenly slid up behind you, his fingers light on your hip.

"Hey, you," he murmured, and you tilted your head back to look at him.

You smiled, just a bit, and he took this comical hitched breath.

"Y/n," he said, as if scolding you. "Don't look at me like that. You wanna break my heart?"

To this day, you aren’t sure if it was that he might’ve been leaving the country or that awful hunch punch, but your heart pounded against your chest too hard, and all you could think to do was to kiss him.

Quickly, without much thought, your lips pressed against his. It had been almost chaste, really, but Yoongi made this low, surprised sound in the back of his throat, his arms going around you and cinching at your waist, tightly, in this near possessive gesture that made your stomach tighten. 

And that was it, at least for you. He’d kissed you back, and you’d been all but lost.

Yoongi didn’t leave the country, despite his plans. Later you wondered if that’d been your first mistake: not being strong enough to let him go.

It’s raining now, the sound of it thudding on the roof of your car louder than your heartbeat, and you can’t stop crying, gasping in these hitching breaths every few minutes, your stomach clenching from the force of your sobs. You know it’s dangerous here, on the side of the road and you can’t even remember if you’ve turned on your flashers but that doesn’t seem to matter, all that matters is that you can’t breathe, something viscous and rotten in your chest and stomach, something like all the mistakes you’ve made and all the regrets you have, maybe all those words, those questions you should have asked but didn’t. They’re choking you, poisoning you from the inside out and it’s flooding, but you fumble with the door handle, push the door open and swing your legs out, putting your head between your knees.

When you lift your head, finally able to breathe again, wanting to feel the rain on your face, there’s the bright glow of headlights, and then a blissful black fades over your eyes. You’re almost grateful.

Your dreams are almost all memories.

It’s disjointed, at first, but then you know where you are. Yoongi’s loft apartment back in college, and you know you’re dreaming but you can feel his hands on you nevertheless. You remember them being cold, clammy almost, and he was trembling as if he was nervous.

You laughed at him when he fumbled with your bra strap and he made this grumble in the back of his throat that made you laugh harder.

The laughter died in your throat when he pulled your breasts out of your bra impatiently, dragged his thumbs across your nipples. Your skin felt hot, like you were fevered, when he leaned forward and marked that spot below your ear again, harder, his teeth grazing against your skin.

When you were bare and arching your back beneath him, he sat up on his knees, his eyes dark and hungry looking down at you. 

“God,” he whispered, his voice low and gravelly. “You are gonna break my heart.”

It’s starts to rain when Yoongi watches you drive away, and he looks down at the pavement and thinks about the first time he saw you, head in your hands, sitting on the curb with your legs crossed like a child.

Something about the way your shoulders had slumped tugged at his heartstrings, drew him to you, and when you looked at him, eyes big and wet, it had been alarming how much it made his heart ache.

He always hated to see you cry.

You weren’t even crying much when he’d pinned you to the bed, hoped he could make it okay with kisses on your throat and chin, make you smile again. Not even when he begged you to stay in the elevator, in the parking lot, banging his hands uselessly on the hood of your car.

“You’re a million miles away, Yoongi,” you’d said, drying your hands after loading the dishwasher, throwing the cloth with more aggression than he’d expected.

“I’m right here,” he’d said easily, and you let out a long breath and he knew that was the wrong thing to say. Knew it was wrong because it was a lie and you fucking knew it. You knew him, better than maybe anyone else in the world.

“You act as if I don���t fucking know you, Yoongi,” you’d said, something vicious in your voice and he stayed seated at the table as you glared at him, stunned that you’d said almost exactly what he’d been thinking.

He doesn’t know why he’d been surprised. You’d always seen right through him, from the first night.

Yoongi remembers the night he’d finally confessed, after two years of watching the line of your neck, wishing he could kiss it again, leave his mark there, after two years of watching other guys flirt with you and pretending it didn’t make his skin heat up, something buzzing under his skin like a beehive. 

He remembers, suddenly and painfully, the way you’d tilted your chin up, turned your head to face him at his graduation party, remembers how full his heart had been, how joy had shot through him like lightning when he’d put his arms around you and you didn’t pull away, how just one corner of your mouth turned up.

He remembers wanting to tell you, wanting to tell you just how much he felt, how he felt full to bursting with you, like you’d burrowed under his skin. He remembers wanting to tell you how he planed every day around you, how the things he’d do almost scared him, the things he’d sacrifice, to keep seeing you smile every day.

Yoongi hadn’t known how to explain it so that you’d understand, so instead he’d done his best to press it into you with his hands and his mouth, like you’d somehow be able to feel it through osmosis, and maybe you had, because after that first night, things had caught on like wildfire.

He’d never told you, really, never actually confessed, and maybe that had been his first mistake.

Yoongi knows that you’ve been drifting apart for weeks. Months. He knows that he’s been absent, not you, knows how hard you’ve been trying but he can’t bring himself to talk to you about it.

What would he say? That he has this opportunity, that he has this once in a lifetime thing and he has to move thousands of miles away for it? That he can’t bring you with him, that they’ve made that crystal clear? 

Yoongi is still just as afraid as he was all those years ago, about what he’d sacrifice for you, because half of him wants to give it all up, tell them to fuck off, he’ll make music in a den in your little one bedroom apartment just so that he can be with you every day. Nothing has ever meant more to him than music, but you. You.

Yoongi can’t tell you that he has this choice to make, this fucking impossible choice but instead of making it, all he can do is try to push it away, ignore it, put it off another week and keep drinking too much when he’s home because he can’t bear the way your eyes plead with him to be with you, to be present and in the moment like the two of you always had been. He can’t bear to think of what it’d be like to not see your purple coffee mug on the counter in the mornings, to not be able to roll over and kiss that hallowed spot below your ear that he’d first marked all those years ago.

Yoongi hadn’t responded, looked down at the table until you’d slammed your hands down on it, angry, your eyes bright.

“Are you fucking someone else?” you’d asked, your voice eerily calm despite how angry you looked, and it was like a spear through his gut.

He’d scoffed, because that was ridiculous. I It wasn’t even worth a response but you stormed towards the door and his breath caught in his throat like a wriggling fish and he tried to stop you but you were absolutely fuming now, angry in a way he’d rarely seen you.

He braced his back against the door, thought that at least he could stop this, at least he could calm you down but he couldn’t get the words to come out.

Yoongi had ended up here, head spinning with the three glasses of wine he’d had at dinner and chest feeling , like you’d ripped his heart out when you’d gone away.

He stands there as it starts to rain, breathing hard, half dressed, and wonders where you’ll go. To your best friend’s apartment? Your mother’s? They’ve both always hated him, anyway.

Maybe all the time he’d spent away at the studio, those nights you’d come home late, maybe...maybe there was someone else. The thought makes his breath hitch in his chest, makes him stumble backwards as if someone has punched him in the stomach, before he turns to go back inside.

The thought sticks in his brain like a fishhook. You’d ask if he was fucking someone else. Is that because you were? At the very least, maybe you’d met someone. Someone who was attentive, someone who listened to you. Someone who was there.

Yoongi isn’t used to this feeling. He’s never been the possessive type, always had an amount of confidence that kept him from ever feeling too jealous. He remembers clearly the last time he’d felt this way, and of course, it was you. Wasn’t it always?

You’d never dated much, always been focused on your studies. Yoongi never even thought about  what would’ve happened when you’d start seeing someone.

He’d been your best friend for six months when you started dating a lacrosse player, a big guy (bigger than Yoongi), and even then, Yoongi shrugged off the slight irritation he felt when you canceled a dinner with him.

It wasn’t until he was sitting on a bench under a tree, studying before an exam, that he saw you with your new beau. You were laughing, piggybacking, your arms braced on his considerable shoulders. 

Yoongi’s skin prickled, like he had a chill or a fever. He felt angry, suddenly, and couldn’t put his finger on why. He sat there, fuming, unable to take his eyes off you, until your boyfriend slid you down, turned to lean down and kiss you, and then Yoongi couldn’t look anymore.

The anger roiling in his gut  turned to something else, something worse, something that dug in and festered over the next few days. He saw your laughing mouth behind his eyelids when he closed his eyes, the way you were still smiling when your boyfriend kissed you.

He wondered late at night when he couldn’t sleep, if you were being held or, even worse, being fucked. It made something vile rise in his throat, like he’d had too much to drink and needed to purge it. It was another agonizing month before he realized he was in love with you, and another month after that before you and your boyfriend broke up.

He curses himself for drinking so much, wishing he could just get in his car and come after you. He fumbles with his phone, the screen swimming in his vision, and he wipes at his eyes angrily. You don’t answer, and he isn’t surprised, leaves a voicemail in a broken voice that he’d be embarrassed about if he had any dignity left. He hates feeling like this, out of control, as if there’s nothing he can do to quiet the madness in his head and his heart.

Yoongi presses the heels of his hands to his eyes, pressing in until he sees spots dance under his eyelids, breathing in deep to try and control his emotions. His mind is racing, thinking of what happens now, all the possibilities of the coming days and weeks and months and years.

You move out, he supposes. Come and get your things, take away all the pieces of you that have accumulated in the apartment over the years. He wonders if you’ll leave something behind, a piece of clothing, maybe that purple mug you like so much. Something he can keep, look at later and remember you.

What happens to all the pictures of you, online? Would you delete them? Block him on everything so that he can’t see your face even on a screen? Panic rises in his throat when he realizes you were always the one taking the pictures, posting them on social media, and he isn’t sure he has many saved.

Yoongi feels like he’ll surely go crazy if he doesn’t have some part of this relationship, something he can look back on that isn’t just memories, because it’ll feel like he made it up, like it was always one sided, from the moment he’d sat next to you on that curb.

Without something, how does he convince himself it was real, that you’d loved him?

On the other hand, what if you didn’t get your things? What if you left everything behind, kept being active on social media, moved on? Started living your life without him, moving on with a new apartment, a new partner?

Yoongi chokes back a sob, alone in the apartment but still holding back, still hiding, and he hates himself for it. When you don’t answer the second, third, fourth time he calls, he curls up on the couch, hoping that he’ll pass out, stop thinking, because it’s like his brain is vibrating in his skull with all the racing thoughts he has, a headache forming between his eyebrows. 

After some time and a few deep breaths, he fights the urge to upturn the second bottle of wine in the cabinet and thinks that there’s a possibility, however slim, that you might be back when he wakes up, tear streaked and soaked from the rain but still his, and the thought comforts him enough that he’s able to fall asleep.

He has these dreams, vivid and disjointed, where he’s reaching out to you and he keeps getting further and further away. Another, where you won’t even look at him, no matter what he says, no matter how much he begs.

When he wakes, it’s cold in the apartment. You are, were, always the one who’d turn on the heat, and he knows you’re still not home the second he opens his eyes.

Yoongi feels antsy all day, full of nervous energy, and he can’t stop himself from calling you every couple of hours, leaving text messages and begging you just to answer once, to let him hear your voice.

The second day is when he starts to panic in earnest, and he’s about to bite the bullet and call your mother when his phone rings.

The oxygen filters out of the air as he listens, and his heart starts pounding in his ears as soon as he hangs up the phone. He’s out the door wearing nothing but a pair of sweats and a tshirt, cursing and returning for his jacket when he realizes it’s still raining.

The hospital hadn’t said much, just that you were there, that he was your emergency contact, and he breaks all manner of traffic laws to get to you, trying not to think of what might have happened, of how it might be his fault.

When he arrives, it’s both better and worse than he’d thought - you’d been found on the highway, unconscious, and god knows how long you’d lain there in the mud before a passerby had stopped and taken you to the hospital.

Pneumonia, they say, telling him that you’ve been in and out of consciousness throughout the night. Yoongi had been your emergency contact. You hadn’t been taking care of yourself, and a night in the rain and in the elements hadn’t helped. Of course he hadn’t noticed. Of course he hadn’t seen how pale you were, how gaunt your cheeks were.

Yoongi stands there, wondering if the doctor can tell that all the blood has drained from his face, his heart thudding hard and useless against his chest plate.

He nods where he’s supposed to and when the doctor leaves the room, Yoongi sits down hard on a nearby chair in the waiting area. He can go in now, they’d said, but how could he? How could he go in there, see you hooked up to IV antibiotics, know that it’s his fault? People die from pneumonia, don’t they? His throat closes up with panic and he has to draw in a long breath through his nostrils to calm himself.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there, his forearms resting on his thighs, hands clasped together. There’s this series of memories rushing through his mind, like snapshots.

Your mouth pressed against his, soft and almost chaste, his arms locked around your waist. He wanted to twirl you around to face him, kiss you hard and dirty in front of all his friends, mark that spot just under your ear again. Not to show them that he possesses you, not to show them that he can kiss such a beautiful woman, but to show everyone how much he loved you, how his every thought was tinged with you.

Instead, he kissed you back just as chastely, stuck to you like glue all night despite it being his party with many trying to come and congratulate them. He had his hands on you all night, at your lower back, sometimes just lightly on your hip, sometimes intertwining his fingers with yours.

And when he walked you back to your dorm, he shuffled his feet at the door, puffed out his cheeks and blown out a breath and looked up at you.

“Yoongi,” you said, and God, he loved how his name sounded on your lips, this lilt like you were always teasing him. “You wanna come in for a drink?”

His cheeks were already flushed from alcohol and he probably shouldn’t have, but you took his hand and he would’ve followed you anywhere, to hell if you’d asked him.

Yoongi had so many plans on how to confess to you before he’d leave the country to go back home, to try and work on music like he’d always planned, most of them some grand romantic gestures, but instead, he stood with his hands shoved in his pockets just inside your door, and called your name.

You turned, standing in the kitchen, and his eyes followed the line of your throat, the curve of your cheek.

“I’m gonna stay,” he blurted out, and he already had a very expensive plane ticket in his wallet but he couldn't bring himself to care.

Yoongi stands up, heads toward your hospital room but he stops at the doorway, hears the beep of the machines and it makes his heart stutter.

He stands outside the door, unable to look inside. More snapshots float through his mind as he leans back against the wall, breathing hard.

“Yoongi,” you breathed, right into the shell of his ear and it made him shiver. He was standing so close to you, one hand on your hip, the other braced on the counter as if he’d fall against you, fall into you.

“Mmm,” he managed, leaning forward, as if you’d beckoned him, and every inch of his skin that touched yours felt heated.

“What’s happening right now?” you asked, and he wanted to laugh but he couldn’t, looking into your wide eyes. You’d been best friends for two years, seen each other at your worst. Now all he could do was think about how much he loved every part of you, good and bad, inside and out.

“I don’t know,” he said honestly, and leaned down to kiss you, his hand moving to your lower back seemingly of its own volition, pulling you closer so that your breasts pressed against his chest.

His tongue slid against yours and his heart seemed like it might thud out of his chest.

When he pulled away from you, breathless, you let out a whine from the back of your throat, just like that first night when he’d marked you, and he couldn't stand it, the way it felt, how much he felt.

He wanted to run but something was pulling him toward you instead of away and instead, he kissed you again.

You pulled away this time, trembling in his arms.

“Yoongi,” you said again. “Are we doing this? Are you-”

“Am I in love with you?” he asked, chest heaving, it was as if he couldn’t catch his breath no matter how hard he tried.

You nodded, slowly, your cheeks flushed.

Instead of speaking, Yoongi nodded back, slowly, and a small smile spread across your lips.

“Yoongi,” you repeated, his name from your lips his favorite sound. “Kiss me again.”

That memory forces Yoongi to enter the room, sit by your bed. You look sick and gray and he wants to take your hand but something stops him.

He thinks now that it’s settled, that he’ll talk to you, that he’ll rework his contract, do anything to make things better. Maybe it won’t work, maybe you’re done, but he can try. He has to try.

Your eyes are closed, lashes fanning across your cheekbones and when Yoongi reaches out to touch your face, he sees that his hands are trembling.

When you do wake, a few moments later, Yoongi wants to crawl under the bed and hide, knows that he’s probably the last person you want to see.

“Yoongi,” you call, and your voice is hoarse and confused but tears stream down Yoongi’s face because it’s still his favorite melody.

“I’m sorry,” he chokes out, and that little smile spreads across your lips again.

“Baby,” you say, and his heart clenches in his chest as you take his hand. “You wanna break my heart?”

#min yoongi x reader #btscreatorscorner #bangtanheadquarters #noonasinnetwork #yoongi x reader #suga x reader #bts imagine

[ialwaysknewyouwerepunk]

falling - a close reading

fine line, track 6

aka to be so lonely’s sad sister

I'm in my bed

And you're not here

“you” and the bedroom: recurring theme ～ mmith, only angel, from the dining table 

And there's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hands

issue echoing through mmith, only angel ⟶ cause of what pushes them apart, or symptom?

hands are empty, reaching out for loved one

Forget what I said

It's not what I meant

And I can't take it back, I can't unpack the baggage you left

recurring theme: miscommunication, or lack of ～ sott, sweet creature, two ghosts, mmith

person needed a break, left - mmith

What am I now? What am I now?

echo of lights up: finding yourself is a struggle sometimes

What if I'm someone I don't want around?

self-hate. talking to himself: “you” has left and harry is left wondering what he’s become. blaming himself for the relationship issues

I'm falling again, I'm falling again, I'm fallin’

happened before: problems with self ～ mmith, only angel

What if I'm down? What if I'm out?

being a weight in the relationship, losing himself to the point of no return, lost his way in his career

What if I'm someone you won't talk about?

needs validation, attention

“you” can be his person, or more general: the listener

You said you cared, and you missed me too

they’re in contact, talking: still trying to work things out

cared about their relationship? about harry?

And I'm well aware I write too many songs about you

we’re aware of it too

love is very much alive in this relationship: familiarity, honesty

And the coffee's out at the Beachwood Cafe

And it kills me 'cause I know we've run out of things we can say

meet up to talk, but the talking goes slow. stubborn (～ sweet creature), hurt, (the other is) afraid to be open (～ golden)

the silence makes H uneasy, makes him despair, despite the fact that they’re there - from the dining table “comfortable silence is so overrated”

you’ve run out of things to say, but still you write all these songs? boys, talk. 

And I get the feeling that you’ll never need me again

to feel wanted and needed; harry knows he needs the other person and is scared it’s one-sided

(self-)doubt

What am I now? What am I now?

What if you're someone I just want around?

variation: i just want you around and that’s what i know. i know that with more certainty than that i want myself around

SYNTHESIS

Falling is the merging of the two main themes on the album, placed perfectly at the end of the first half. There is that same deep-rooted, familiar love, mixed with that search of self and a bunch of pain.

Harry is struggling, lost, and coping in negative ways. The alcohol made him say things to his partner that he doesn’t mean, and it’s caused a spiral into self-doubt. The themes and general atmosphere match songs like Meet Me in the Hallway and Only Angel, which also feature loneliness, the other in the relationship not talking or having left, terrible or no communication and bad coping mechanisms. In Falling, however, it’s finally made explicit that there is a deeper root to their problems, or at least from Harry’s side. Echoing Lights Up, he stops to ask himself what he’s become. There’s despair in the question, but also insecurity. ‘What if’ reigns; he doesn’t have the answers. His grief is pouring out of him, this is rock bottom. “I can’t unpack the baggage you left” could mean that the other person has left Harry with the clear message to figure his shit out and stop fucking around. Stop grabbing for the bottle, stop being dramatic, stop being petty and stubborn and look inward. So Harry crashed and is left to wonder who he is exactly. 

A couple fighting and trying to work through their shit is love. The other person hasn’t abandoned Harry in his problems, they’re still there to meet up and talk and express that they care. They both miss each other. After their heavy fight, where the other left all that baggage, the conversation is stunted, but they’re still having it. 

It’s a song written about the deepest of their struggle, a time where Harry was down deep, which strained the relationship. His cry, “and I get the feeling that you’ll never need me again,” is as much a real fear as unwarranted anxiety. It’s a feeling, fuelled by self-doubt, which can often cause a skewered view of reality, especially if it's about how someone else feels about you. And, in the midst of trying to find yourself, you’re sometimes so lost you don’t even know what’s real anymore. I think this is definitely a strong element in Falling. His feelings are very intense (“it kills me”) and Harry is just overall sad about everything. This sadness is warranted, because they’re going through very real struggles, and it’s intensified by his character, which has a flair for the dramatic and a knack for self-pitying (“i’m in my bed, and you’re not here” sounds like a sad baby to me). Harry even tells us that the other has given him confirmation that they care and miss him, and still his overthinking has thrown that aside, because oh no there are silences during their conversations. These silences could even mean that the other is being careful with their words, that they’re both being more considerate and calm.

The music video shows Harry with his drink at the piano (lying on his back on the stool at first, playing the opening notes with one hand like the dramatic baby he is), in a room full of details that probably carry a plethora of meaning unknown to us (a ship and fish painted on the piano, the shutters opening to show Paris, etc). He’s dressed in a beautiful lilac blouse, draped behind him like a cape, a skirt, or even a tail. Like in Lights Up and (almost) in Adore You, Harry is underwater, which is clearly one of his preferred ways to express sadness, escape (from himself, his reflection), and loneliness (ft. hs1’s album cover). When he’s entirely submerged, the blouse transforms and floats around him. He’s a mermaid, almost. And that, then, alludes to gender, which ties everything about this song and this album together perfectly: love and self-discovery, mainly in terms of gender. The beginning of the video is actually the end, with Harry drenched and panting. So, eventually, the water ebbs away again.

Just like the music video hints at a happy ending, the very last variation of the chorus leaves us with a feeling of hope. “What if you’re someone I just want around?” Harry doesn’t just need them, he wants them. And that’s all he knows for now.

Read my other lyric analyses here

#fine line analysis #falling #ahhhh this was so much more fun than the cherry one #we're back on track #linking all of his songs and trying to figure out the puzzle pieces of their story #the mosaic of experiences #our mermaid #lp #my posts #Lyrics

[phoebe-delia]

For the song prompt, let’s hear your track 5 lol

Lmaooo this made me laugh, thank you. I've already done my 13th track and now I get to do Track 5! (If you don't know why Track 5 is significant, it's because Taylor Swift puts her most emotional songs as the 5th song on every album).

My Track 5 is, fittingly, a Taylor song; not only that, it's "gold rush," which makes me happy because 1. it's a great song and 2. I actually wrote a fic based on it for the first EVER Drarry as Taylor fic--before I knew this would become a series. It's from Draco's POV, and it can be read here.

I'm so glad to take another crack at this song. This will serve as a sequel/companion piece to the original, but it can stand on its own. Enjoy.

For the first time in his life, Harry was too excited to sleep.

Unlike Dudley, he hadn't spent Christmas Eves and the hours before his birthdays anticipating presents and sweets. He'd never had anything to look forward to, nothing to keep him up at night in anxious glee.

But now, as he stared up at the ceiling, his new roommates sleeping soundly around him, he found himself able to calm his exhilarated mind enough to rest.

He knew that the red and gold curtains that hung around his bed meant that he was in Gryffindor, and he mentally thanked the magical hat for not sorting him into Slytherin with that Malfoy git.

Irritation rose in his chest at the memory of Malfoy insulting his new friend, Ron. Harry'd decided then that anyone who could look at Ron and decide to be so rude to him must be someone to avoid. He knew a bully when he saw one, and bullies, in his experience, didn't change.

Harry turned onto his side to stare out the window, marveling at the novelty of sleeping somewhere with a view other than cramped, blank walls.

He curled up into the warm blanket, finally letting the exhaustion of the day lull him to sleep.

________

Third-year Charms, Harry decided, wasn't any more interesting than it had been the first two years.

He sat next to Ron, who was watching Hermione take notes with machine-like speed and precision. While the sight of Hermione in action was entertaining for a minute or so, Harry didn't understand why Ron stared at her all the time.

Not for the first time that class, Harry regretted not sitting toward the back of the room. Malfoy was sat next to Parkinson at the table just behind them, and Harry knew it was unwise to turn one's back to one's enemy. It was much more prudent to stare at one's nemesis for as long as possible, using subtlety and stealth to make sure one's observations went undetected.

Ron stared at Hermione almost as much as Harry stared at Malfoy, but surely Ron didn't think their friend was up to something.

Well, unless you called memorizing every comma of Hogwarts: A History nefarious.

“Remember, class, your homework for tomorrow is seven inches on the history of the Summoning Charm. You are dismissed," Flitwick turned to the board, casting a cleaning charm to erase the notes.

Harry was startled out of his reverie by the sudden announcement, as well as by Ron, who nudged him and gestured to Hermione, whose head was still bent over her desk as she wrote furiously.

"How long d'you reckon she'd stay here and write if no one stopped her?" Ron muttered.

Harry let out a short laugh and opened his mouth to respond when he caught sight of Malfoy darting quickly out of the room.

Harry frowned. But before he could voice his pondering over why Malfoy'd all but sprinted from the classroom, Hermione had finally snapped out of her note-taking daze and joined Harry and Ron.

As they walked along the corridor, Ron and Hermione continued to squabble over whether or not they needed to go to the library during their free period.

"But 'Mione, it's called a free period. A period of freedom. Don't you want to be free?"

"I don't want my mind to be enslaved to ignorance, Ronald! Information is freedom."

"Merlin, fine. But I have to go get my textbook from the dorm first. Harry, you coming?"

Harry nodded. Hermione narrowed her eyes at the two of them before giving them a mollified nod. Clutching her books tightly, Hermione turned on her heel and walked briskly toward the library.

"C'mon mate," Ron said, tugging at Harry's sleeve. "Let's take the long way."

Ron prattled on about quidditch, and Harry tried to listen, he really did. But his thoughts drifted inevitably back to Malfoy. He kicked himself again for not choosing a better surveillance point in class; maybe if he'd been watching he'd have seen why Malfoy'd fled class at the end.

He and Ron ventured outside, through the courtyard and into the open area beside the lake. Harry felt a surge of victory and relief at the sight of Malfoy sitting on the bench, his head tilted back with a soft smile as if enjoying the warmth on his face. His hair glittered golden in the sun.

Without thinking, Harry started walking toward him, an animated Ron following along.

“But Harry, they haven’t got a chance! Look, the Cannons--”

Ron stopped talking as Malfoy turned to sneer at them.

“Can I help you?” Malfoy drawled, “Or do you mind taking your boisterous conversation elsewhere? I was here first.”

Ron glared. “Shut up, Malfoy. We didn’t see you, or we wouldn’t have come any closer in case being a prat is contagious.”

Malfoy smirked. “Unlike you, I wasn’t raised in a barn, so I don’t carry diseases. But we snakes do bite, so mind your place, Weaselbee.”

Ron started toward Draco, his fists clenched, but Harry grabbed his arm, despite the rage swelling in his own chest.

“Ron, he’s not worth it. C’mon.” Harry said, eyes narrowed at Malfoy in a clear warning.

Ron gave Malfoy one last glare before he let Harry steer him away from Malfoy, who widened his smirk in satisfaction. They walked away, Ron continuing his rant as they made their way to Gryffindor Tower. Harry looked over his shoulder, catching one more glimpse of Malfoy basking in the sunshine.

________

“P-Potter,” Malfoy gasped, trapped between the bathroom wall as Harry crowded him, his face inches away. “W-what—?”

Harry shook his head, smiling softly. “You heard me, Malfoy.”

“I-I’m not sure I did, actually. Might you repeat it?”

Harry chuckled. “Why don’t I show you instead?”

Harry lifted a warm hand reached up to cup Malfoy’s cheek, leaned in and—

Harry woke with a gasp, sweat beading on his forehead. A hand scrubbed over his face as he wiped the sleep from his eyes and felt his four-poster ground him to reality.

After the last six years, he was no stranger to waking up in the middle of the night from strange dreams, but his subconscious--or rather Voldemort--usually tortured him with disturbing images and nightmare scenarios.

This time, it seems Voldemort had left Harry's subconscious to its own horny, teenaged devices--and it apparently had a twisted sense of humor.

That moment of blind rage in the bathroom haunted Harry enough during the day that he wasn't surprised that it would make its way into his dreams--but his chest hurt with the knowledge that perhaps it might've gone differently. Might've ended in whispered apologies, explanations, and soft, exploring kisses.

But if Malfoy hadn't hated him before, he certainly did now, and Harry couldn't blame him.

Harry knew a bully when he saw one, and during that moment, he couldn't pretend it had been Malfoy.

He raised a hand to the scar on his forehead and wondered when he'd changed.

________

“Draco Malfoy, you are hereby sentenced to three months house arrest, followed by one year of probation,” Kingsley banged the gavel, the sound reverberating in the large room before chatter rose from the avid audience.

Harry watched with a small smile as Malfoy and his mother sat together, their cool masks wavering with emotion for just a second before shifting back into place.

He decided to give them a moment before approaching Malfoy, but if he didn't get this over with now, he'd never have the courage.

Suddenly, Malfoy rose on shaking legs and walked over to Harry, who quickly stood to meet him in the middle. Harry regarded him with a tight-lipped smile.

Malfoy tipped his head slightly. “Thank you, Potter.”

Harry nodded. “Sure, Malfoy.”

Malfoy nodded before turning away, stopping when Harry, acting on impulse, reached out and grabbed his arm.

“Wait, Malfoy. I have something for you.”

Malfoy looked at him in confusion as Harry reached into his pocket and handed him his wand, stifling a chuckle when Malfoy’s eye widened.

“Thanks for letting me borrow it,” Harry said, his voice quiet.

Malfoy nodded again. He took the wand from Harry’s hand, closing his eyes. Harry let in a sharp breath at the sight of a soft smile on Malfoy's lips as he reunited with his wand. The image was more compelling than Harry imagined, as evidenced by the butterflies that filled his stomach.

Harry cleared his throat. “Well, er, I’ll see you around, Malfoy,” he said, nodding one final time before turning to leave.

He smiled as he heard Malfoy's quiet, "Goodbye, Potter," as he walked away.

________

Harry pressed his lips together in a grimaced smile as a few younger students gathered near him at the table in the Great Hall. Ron and Hermione shot him sympathetic looks, and he gave them an apologetic shrug before turning to sign another autograph for a wide-eyed first year.

If this would be an indication of what his eighth year would be, Harry wasn't sure how much longer he'd last.

After promises to fulfill the fans' requests later, the giggling group left the table to let him eat in relative peace--it was rather hard to enjoy one's dinner while half the school was staring at you.

His eyes flickered to the Slytherin table, where the students ate mechanically, their faces blank. Malfoy, who'd sent surprisingly genuine apology letters over the summer, looked thoughtful; not calculating or analyzing, but pensive.

Lying in bed that evening, Harry remembered the image of Malfoy at the Black Lake with his head tipped back in the sunlight. He thought of the rare smile Malfoy'd had when he held his wand for the first time after his trial, and the feeling that had bubbled up in his own chest at the sight.

Harry looked out the window at the night sky and wondered if happiness would be a constant thrum under his skin, or if it could be found in stolen moments tucked into his heart. The stars glittered in silent answer, shining with anticipation.

#drarry #drarry fanfic #draco and harry #draco malfoy #harry potter #phoebedelia #harry potter x taylor swift #songfic #taylor swift #drarry squad #drarry fanfiction #draco x harry

[comradekatara]

gaang + weyes blood

gonna respond for this one similarly to how i assigned the gaang songs from temple, since titanic rising is by far the album of hers i’ve listened to most.

a lot’s gonna change can apply to all them in various ways, but feels most obviously related to aang, seeing as his world undergoes the most massive change, losing nearly everything and everyone he knows. throughout the song, the narrator tells “you” (who is both a second person and the narrator herself) that “born in a century lost to memories” (quite literally in aang’s case) you must “learn to get by” and “try to leave it all behind,” which aang attempts through his escapist coping methods, but ultimately, just as aang must confront the past to end the war, the narrator amends her thesis: “let me change my words / show me where it hurts,” recognizing that one must acknowledge their grief regarding their past, now forever lost to destruction and to time.

andromeda feels extremely mai to me. throughout the show, she feels bored, aimless, depressed, and frustrated by her own inertia. she leaps at the opportunity to get out of occupied omashu and do violence with azula, but almost immediately decides that she’s bored of chasing the avatar around the world. (“lift the heart from the depths it's fallen to / we all want something new / but can't seem to follow through.”) then she returns to the fire nation with zuko, presumably assuming that her relationship with him will finally make her happy. but he doesn’t remotely give her what she needs, and she’s just as bored and frustrated as ever. (“something's better than nothing / or so that I thought / now I know it's just one dream / all these others gonna tear me apart.”) the first time she really feels any true passion is the indignation and hurt she feels upon his leaving with only a letter to show for it. but his commitment to his own ideals, rather than the mold of the perfect prince he was trying to squeeze himself into when in the fire nation with her, inspires her to actually take a stand and break out of her apathetic haze. and it is this moment that inspires ty lee to put her own cards on the table. (“love is calling / it's time to give to you / something you can hold onto / I dare you to try.”) mai’s first real action is rewarded, finally, with something real in return, which is all she’s ever wanted.

everyday reminds me most of katara. i know i’m of the minority opinion in this, but i still don’t think that even if katara and aang did get together in the final moments of the show that they would stay together forever. i could maybe see them getting back together at some point, but i don’t think they would or should stay in a committed & monogamous relationship throughout the entirety of their teens, and even their twenties. they’re both young, romantic, adventurous, attractive kids with their whole lives ahead of them! they deserve to have flings & short-term relationships, especially katara, who crushes on every attractive boy she sees (in true 14 year straight girl who has never known another teenage boy apart from her brother fashion). even if she does like aang, that doesn’t mean that she should be denied the formative teen experience of dating around and figuring out what she likes (as does aang in return). so i think this song represents a period where she’s gotten quite cynical about dating (another formative experience she deserves to have!) and feels a bit aimless when it comes to love. but imo that’s a healthy experience to have, and way more realistic than the idea that katara & aang were together since middle school with no hiccups in their relationship & got m*rried & had 3 babies. bleh. so yeah. messy straight girl rights!

something to believe is def a song for katara and also zuko. before the show’s events, they are both pinning all their hopes on this idea of the avatar, who will be their salvation. they’re both depressed and grieving, and their coping mechanism and response to the trauma they’ve experienced is a fervent drive and dedication to what is for all intents and purposes an impossible idea. they are both searching for the avatar (zuko more actively than katara, but it’s also no coincidence that her belief in his power and catalyst for change also makes her the one to raise him from his stasis), and once they find him, they believe in him even harder – the avatar, aang, becomes their drive and their will, he is the motivation they need to change the world. “something bigger and louder than these voices in me / something to believe.”

movies is also a very katara song. she is someone who relies on narratives to make sense of the world, and makes sense of her role in the world as being the hero in her own story. unlike aang, katara in many ways does fit the mold of an archetypal western hero, the daring, swashbuckling adventurer with a pure heart. she idealizes and romanticizes the world around her (“i know the meaning / i know the story / i know the glory / i love movies”), but that doesn’t necessarily mean she lives in a delusional fantasy. from a metatextual perspective, she is the narrator, she is the hero, she is quite literally the star of her own movie.

mirror forever reminds me of the relationship between mai and zuko. their relationship is ultimately disconnected by an artificial barrier, wherein they cannot communicate openly and honestly because neither of them wants to confront the truths about themselves that would change the nature of their relationship. they love the idea of their relationship more than they actually feel those feelings of romance or devotion for each other (“yes we love our love most of all”). they can’t be honest with each other if they both refuse to admit to themselves what they actually want. “oh baby, take a look in the mirror.”

wild time makes me think of zuko and aang’s arcs (and also katara, in a similar way). they shoulder these immense Destinies that are imposed on them by their ancestors and their place in history and they can feel the burden of that responsibility weighing down on them (“don’t cry, it’s a wild time to be alive”). enduring the pain and the grief of their childhoods (“burning much more than ever before”) and accepting that unjust pain and coming out stronger because of it (“let these changes make you more holy and true”), and changing the world so that no one will ever have to suffer in the way that they did again (“burning down the door”).

picture me better feels extremely sokka/yue to me. I know what the song is actually about, but it feels like it can apply so specifically to their relationship (the lines “don’t need no money when you’re around / and you’re making me act funny / can’t help to smile with those eyes that shine on me” is even such an apt description for the nature of their relationship in the nwt). not to mention the cosmic/celestial, ethereal/liminal imagery of “the stars and moon” and “the call from beyond.” the entire song feels like a conversation between them reflecting on having known each other (and potentially meeting again). an ode to their tragic, cosmic love story. </3

#the gaang and #synthesis #beemilys #asks #posts u spend multiple days on even tho one maybe two people will read it bc ur insane :) #atlamusic

[chitto]

I Analyzed All Of the Songs on Ranboo’s Lore Playlist and Here’s What I Learned.

We can pick a few themes out from the songs: 

Time

Fighting something inside of you 

Alluding to a villain arc 

Transition of a person 

My biggest theory from all this is that c!Ranboo is a time traveler from the future (probably before Mizu but after the Haunted Mansion). He traveled to the past, November 27th specifically, to stop c!Tommy’s exile. We can assume that in c!Ranboo’s future, c!Tommy burned down c!George’s house by himself but when c!Ranboo went back, he got caught up in it, thus creating a time paradox. (Evidence from the songs Merry-Go-Round of Life, all songs of Hawaii - Part Two by Miracle Musical, and The Ruler of Everything). Now knowing he is the cause of c!Tommy’s exile, c!Ranboo feels immense amounts of guilt for his actions, the regret keeping him up at night (Ain’t No Rest for The Wicked). This mental stress is something that has resulted in the beginnings of insanity for c!Ranboo (The Mind Electric). 

A villain arc is very plausible for c!Ranboo in the near future, most likely brought up by harm coming to c!Tubbo or Michael (Killer Queen, Mr. Bad Guy, I Can’t Decide, Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked, and Live and Let Die) 

Full Analysis on Each Song Under the Cut: 

(All Song Lyric Analysis Credits go to the wonderful people on genius, I merely fit them into the context of the DreamSmp and c!Ranboo) 

Prologue (StarKid) - A simple ticking clock. ARG trailer tie in as well as even more references of time. 

Introduction to the Snow (Miracle Musical) - Comes off an album that (storywise) has the listener loop over and over the songs in the album, as a time paradox. 

Dream Sweet in Sea Major (Miracle Musical) - Final song in the album (loops). Occurs in three movements. Tells the story of a sailor that gives himself up to the mermaids. Lyrics don’t give much in terms of hints at anything. 

Turn the Lights Off (Tally Hall) - About a journey through puberty and adolescence (??) perhaps could be changed to fit. However main name of the song is meant to convey accepting differences and confronting fears, something c!Ranboo doesn’t really do. First line also says ‘Don’t go in there, you’ll become one, Freaky creatures, monster party’ perhaps relating to the enderwalk/possession c!Ranboo goes through. 

The Mind Electric (Miracle Musical) - The song starts off in reverse, the singer speaking backwards. Once the song straightens out, we’re shown that the protagonist of the song is a mentally unstable man trying to figure out what triggers a specific fear. The second verse then goes into a young child who’s been held trial for insanity. The child and the judge then have an open dialogue throughout the rest of the verse until the child is sent to an asylum. The song concludes with insane yet peaceful thoughts from the child. Obviously I’m not a psychiatrist but doing some light research into insanity (NOT psychosis, as insanity is more of an umbrella term for unstable mental state while psychosis is a specified disorder) you can see a few signs of insanity that could be applied to c!Ranboo. ‘Denial of obvious problems’ Many times c! Ranboo has dismissed or downplayed his issues and problems, most notably when he’s found in a panicked state by c!Sam who asks him if he’s okay, to which c!Ranboo replies that he’s fine. ‘Delusions or Hallucinations’ this is a big one as throughout the Doomsday arc, c!Ranboo spoke to c!Dream in his panic room, only to realize he was talking to no one. ‘Dramatic changes in sleeping habits’ This is more of a reach as we have no actually confirmation but it could be assumed that c!Ranboo’s enderwalking could be disrupting his sleep patterns. 

Live and Let Die (Paul McCartney) - a song about a once young person who used to say ‘Live and Let Live’ but has now changed their maxim to ‘Live and Let Die’. Could be said that as people grow older they grow more cynical. Granted the phrases mean the same thing but one seems much more pessimistic. 

The Ruler of Everything (Tally Hall) - Once again a song about time, the entire song meant to symbolize how time controls our lives (once again feeding into a time paradox theory). The song has a verse that is a man and Time itself singing. The song then starts to speed up, representing how short periods of our lives can be in the grand scheme of things. ‘Do you understand that mechanical hands are the ruler of everything’ This lyric of the song is meant to mean that time (the mechanical hands of the clock) are at the root of everything, once again drawing us back to a time motif with Ranboo’s character. This specific line could lead us to believe that c!Ranboo is being ‘controlled’ by time, aka perhaps caught in a time travelers loop. 

Merry-Go-Round Of Life (Howl’s Moving Castle OST) - While the song itself is an instrumental without words, one could do some digging into the story of Howl’s Moving Castle, spoilers for the film in this analysis. In Howl’s Moving Castle, there is a sequence in which Sophie goes back in time to find Howl, seeing him as a young boy. She calls out to him, telling him to find her in the future, before getting taken back to her time. It seems pretty insignificant until you remember that in the beginning of the film, during Howl and Sophie’s first interaction he says to her, “There you are, sweetheart, sorry I’m late. I was looking everywhere.” thus representing that Howl has been looking for Sophie his entire life after she called out to him in the past. So what does this mean for c!Ranboo? Well its just more time motif and even more time paradox themes. But what even is a time paradox? A time paradox is when somebody who has traveled back in time, becomes a part of the past and causes the events they set out to stop in the first place. Perhaps this means c!Ranboo traveled back in time to stop c!Tommy’s exile, as it was a catalyst event that resulted in many problems on the server (L’manberg’s second destruction to name one) before getting sucked into the events that caused it himself. 

Killer Queen (Queen) - Really can’t say too much for this song as the song is meant to convey how “that classy people can be whores as well” (Freddie Mercury). Freddie also said that anyone else could call their own interpretations of the song as well. I can’t really think of too much about the song that could be molded to c!Ranboo. 

Mr. Bad Guy (Freddie Mercury) - This one is more interesting as the bridge of this song details how Freddie is ‘Mr. Bad Guy’ and that he can ruin people’s lives and many people are afraid of him. This could sound like something c!Ranboo would say in relation to someone trying to threaten the people he cares about. c!Ranboo going to any length for those he cares about (most notably his family) is something that recently cc!Ranboo has tried to drive home, making it a tweet under his character’s lore thread on twitter. 

Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked (Cage the Elephant) - The main line of this song is a bible verse that means that those who are sin-free can sleep well at night knowing they haven’t done anything wrong but those are commit sins need to keep one eye open at all times. Perhaps c!Ranboo believes that he has done something wrong that keeps him up at night. It could be tied back to the time paradox theory by saying that c!Ranboo is kept up at night by the fact that he couldn’t stop the bad events from happening, even becoming a part of them. 

The Bidding (Tally Hall) - While the song itself is about an auction in which men are trying to “sell” themselves to a woman, I would like to call attention to one specific verse. ‘I’ve been training like a Pavlov dog,  Let my independence out to take a hike, All you gotta do is activate my bell, and I’ll fetch you anything you like’. The first lyric calls reference to Ivan Pavlov, who ran a conditioning experiment on dogs, training them to associate the sound of a bell with food, whether they actually got food or not. The last two lyrics I find particularly interesting as we have seen somebody “activate” c!Ranboo. c!Sapnap. After c!Sapnap visited c!Dream in prison, c!Dream asked c!Sapnap to deliver a message to c!Ranboo. The message being ‘:)’. When c!Sapnap repeated the message to c!Ranboo, c!Ranboo immediately switched and began to speak in enderman language before wandering off. He then spoke to c!Sapnap in chat saying, in ender, “Doomed are those who try to run, for it always catches up eventually :)’. This is one of many incidents of c!Ranboo being switched into his enderwalk state, in which he does stuff for c!Dream such as burning down the community house. 

I Can’t Decide (Scissor Sisters) - This song is a upbeat song about a psychotic killer trying to decide on whether or not he should kill his victim. This song could relate back to c!Ranboo’s relationship with c!Dream. c!Ranboo has been very cagey on whether or not he would like c!Dream, most recently being very eager to break into prison and murder him. This song could also hint towards a possible villain arc for c!Ranboo. 

Stardust Crusaders (JoJo’s Bizarre Adventures OST) - Unfortunately, this song is another instrumental. And even more unfortunately, I don’t watch JJBA so I can’t comment on what the song could be alluding to. Stardust Crusaders is the name of an arc of the show but reading through the plot summary on Wikipedia doesn’t turn back anything that could be tied to c!Ranboo. 

A Mask of My Own Face (Lemon Demon) - While the song itself is relatively simple, a man singing about how he wants to wear a mask of his own face to confuse people, a few lines have sparked certain people to examine the song deeper coming to the conclusion that the singer wants to cause chaos and controversy. The mask of his own face would allow him to mask his identity, as no one would wear a mask of their own face, while still allowing him to be associated with the chaos. For c!Ranboo I can’t really see this pointing to anything but the Syndicate. c!Ranboo really does believe in their core value of dismantling the things on the server that are bad but also he knows many people he’s close to who are at odds with members of the Syndicate, most notable c!Tubbo. However this could be rather lose as cc!Ranboo is a big fan of Lemon Demon and who hasn’t put a song from their favorite artist on a playlist even though the vibe doesn’t necessarily fit. 

Stranded Lullaby (Miracle Musical) - Another song of the Miracle Musical album Hawaii - Part Two, which loops itself over within the story. This particular song is about a sailor sailing through a cerebral ocean, which may or may not represent time itself; the sailor being a time traveler who had a mistake in his time traveling. This once again brings us back to the theory of c!Ranboo as a time traveler. There is also a line I would like to call upon, ‘Aimless thoughts and papers blown around, A million moments meant remembered rest in deep dark sound’. These lyrics are meant to relate to memories and how truly fleeting some may be, just papers floating in our brains eventually lost to time. This obviously can relate back to c!Ranboo’s memory problems, which are a known side effect of time travel, as told to us through the story of c!Karl, the only other time traveler on the server (excluding c!Connor who is only theorized as a time traveler for right now). 

Hidden In The Sand (Tally Hall) - This is slightly complicated as the song has two meanings. On the surface, the song is about a man who falls in love with a woman who leaves him, however the man is still in love with her. But in the music video, a new meaning can be found. The music video shows a cruise full of people, all very nice and kind until the ship begins to sink and the real, selfish, sides of the people is revealed. ‘Hidden in the Sand’ is meant to symbolize that a persons true nature is covered up by their outward acts and personality. This could apply to c!Ranboo, as he is outwardly very polite and gentle, growing attached to every animal he finds and refusing to kill any Enderman but he could have a whole other personality to him that we don’t know about. If songs such as ‘I Can’t Decide’ and ‘Mr. Bad Guy’ are any hints, we could theorize that c!Ranboo has a secret dark side to him that could be exposed in the events of his family being threatened. 

Now I’m Here (Queen) -  No statements or theories about what the song means or any of the lyrics. 

& (Tally Hall) - This song, as with others off this particular album, deal with opposites. The whole chorus of this song is about certain opposites such as dark and light or cold and hot. Relating back to c!Ranboo, perhaps this song is meant to tell us that c!Ranboo is a foil of a certain character. Possibilities could be c!Dream and c!Ranboo, as c!Dream is very against attachments towards things and is a very outwardly violent person while c!Ranboo is attached to almost every animal and enderman (not to mention c!Tubbo and Michael) and is a very peaceful person, or perhaps c!Ranboo and c!Karl, the two time (theorized) travelers on the server. c!Karl has a stronger control over his abilities and seems to retain most of his memory fairly well so far while c!Ranboo perhaps can’t control his power and has short term memory loss and can’t remember where he came from. 

I’m Gonna Win (Rob Cantor) - This song is a description of a fight between the singer and his inner demons, the fight resulting in very physical injuries for the singer. This can relate back to c!Ranboo, as he could be fighting the demons of his enderwalking state. This song has a very cheerful outlook on the fight however, as the singer is very confident in his abilities and knows he will win. c!Ranboo isn’t always the most positive, sometimes believing more in the pessimistic outcome but this could be a new leaf for c!Ranboo or a goal of his to be more positive. 

#please rb #this took a very long time #dsmp #dream smp #dreamsmp #ranboo #ranboo dsmp #dsmp ranboo #ranboo lore #c!ranboo #dsmp theory #dsmp analysis #dsmp meta