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denimbex1986 · 2 months

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'The cryptic ending moments of All of Us Strangers, starring Andrew Scott and Paul Mescal, might need a little explaining for some audiences to grasp what the movie intended to convey.

What Happened at the End of All of Us Strangers?

All of Us Strangers follows Andrew Scott's Adam, a gay screenwriter who is working on a screenplay, one which sets him down a path of reconciling with the trauma of losing his parents at a young age.

As he goes through all that, Adam also meets Paul Mescal's Harry, another tenant in his nearly empty London apartment building.

Most of the film juggles those two storylines as it dives deep into an exploration of Adam's multi-faceted character—from the trauma of never coming out to his family or knowing them as an adult to fighting his intense loneliness and feelings of isolation.

Everything seems to be going well for Adam, as he has cathartic and emotional conversations with his parents and grows closer to Harry. But everything takes a turn for the worse after a bad drug trip while clubbing.

After Adam attempts to take Harry to his childhood home to meet his dead parents (which is historically not a great move), Adam seemingly scares off his new lover. At the same time, the spirits of his parents conclude that their son needs to let them go so he can move on.

Following an emotional scene at one of his favorite places to eat as a child, Adam can do just that as he heartbreakingly says goodbye to his mom and dad.

Sadly, audiences are greeted with a sad twist in the movie's ending: Adam goes to Harry's flat only to find his dead body, which has been decomposing for quite some time.

Much like how he saw his late parents, Adam runs into Harry's spirit (or a mental delusion, if that's how one wants to read it).

While Harry has trouble reconciling with this revelation, the two ultimately connect over their love for one another.

The final shot of the film sees the couple in bed as the camera zooms out from them, the image slowly growing into an endless constellation of stars in an expansive universe—signifying Harry's ability to move on and be at peace as his soul joins the cosmos.

Was Harry a Ghost the Whole Time?

For viewers wondering when Paul Mescal's Harry died during the movie, the answer isn't that he was a ghost the whole time.

All evidence points to his being alive the first time he appears on Adam's doorstep. However, once he's softly denied from keeping his company, he retreats to his room.

It's here where he likely lost his life, either intentionally or unintentionally, and probably due to excessive alcohol and drug consumption.

There are a few pieces of evidence that definitively point to this.

For one, Mescal's character is wearing the same pink sweatshirt in death he wore when Adam first met him. He's also holding the same bottle of whiskey.

Another telling sign is how, in the end, he notes how he "was so scared that night" and that he "just needed to not be alone."

Then, assuming Adam's parents are truly a manifestation of some version of the afterlife, there's no other explanation for why he would have seen them through the door of Adam's childhood home.

That's also probably when Harry realized his circumstances, so he freaked out.

To drive the point home, director Andrew Haigh confirmed that the night Harry first arrives at Adam's doorstep, "he is alive at that point" but that is also "the night that he dies."

Was Adam Dead the Whole Time, Too?

It wouldn't be crazy to think that maybe Andrew Scott's Adam was also dead.

It does feel like it would fit in smoothly with everything else going on. Perhaps the strangely empty apartment building is a manifestation of purgatory, and both Adam and Harry are restless souls who can't find peace. This would make the final shot of the film even more poignant, suggesting both of their souls were able to move on together after meeting and connecting.

Some fans think Adam could have died at the beginning of the film, as signified by the fire alarm that goes off (suggesting that the character died in an actual fire instead of making it out of the building).

However, this doesn't seem to have been the intent of director Andrew Haigh, who, either way, supports audiences having their own interpretations.

Another element of the story that doesn't line up with Adam being dead the whole time is how he interacts with other people in the real world, such as the waitress at the diner.

What Was the Point of All of Us Strangers?

At the end of the day, All of Us Strangers is about a handful of heavy themes, whether audiences can figure out the logistics of the metaphysical story.

A key pillar of the experience is the exploration of being gay and some of the struggles that can come with it. From feeling like an outcast within your own family to pretending to be someone else to avoid attention, and even having to worry about outdated stigmas (such as Adam's worry about ever having sex due to possibly getting AIDS)—and that's just touching the surface of how the movie handles those topics.

Then, the movie focuses on grief and how all-consuming it can be.

Adam had been unable to fully move on from the death of his parents when he was a child, even late into his adulthood. Being able to nostalgically explore his past and reconcile with his parent's souls, while undoubtedly cathartic, almost led to him willingly getting trapped in that trauma forever.

Needless to say, this is certainly one of those movies that will be further appreciated upon each rewatch.'

#All of Us Strangers #Andrew Scott #Paul Mescal #Andrew Haigh

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cassurrjoybell-30 · 3 months

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Howling Love - Chapter 7

*Warning Adult Content*

Camryn Summer.

To be fair, I mean who could resist him, he's the cutest little thing you could find, with those full lips he makes into a duck-face when he's trying to seem all important and sassy.

And with all his sassy remarks, Dean was right, from the first moment I met Amille Laurent, I was whipped, he made my otherwise lazy wolf yip and act like a puppy whining for attention, he intentionally or unintentionally made me smile, either was fine by me because he was fine.

I didn't care if he couldn't talk, used his cell-phone to do it, I'd seen him all throughout this week despite me avoiding him, I had been a creep watching him, I was actually familiar with a few phrases he mostly used when he spoke in sign language.

Yes, yes... I had watched him to that extent and now having been lectured into talking to him, I wondered how such a small little thing blew up like a bomb when he was mad, he could have the world with cuteness honestly.

Holding his hand was magic, it fit right into mine, I liked holding it, I liked how soft and tiny it was, delicate compared to mine, it somehow made my wolf even happier to have him there, he was gorgeous.

[Do you even know where you're going?] he asked as I was driving deeper into pack land, then I realized I had no idea where I was going.

[I thought so, follow the GPS] he instructed.

"Got it duck-face, you know, one of these days you're going to have to treat me with the slightest hint of trust in my intelligence," I stated and I knew that smile as he typed.

[When you start behaving like you're intelligent, I will] he retorted and I gasped slightly looking at him and that smug grin.

"So if I'm that daft, you'll be my brains right, you'll always be by my side to think for both of us," I exclaimed and he snickered.

[You're not roping me in with that, I am not going to be the belt to your pants, that's a lot of work] he protested.

"You're the smart one," I whined a little.

[I never said I was and besides, if you want me that close to you, you need more game than that] he retorted and that statement alone felt like a burn on my game.

"I've got good game," I argued loudly as he chuckled, the GPS signalled we had arrived and he smiled my way then pressed his phone.

[Not right now you don't] he inserted and my jaw dropped whilst he sassily got out of the car.

"Hey I've got good game, that was nothing, don't walk away," I argued as I grabbed some of my stuff from my car, locked it and hurriedly jogged toward him.

[You're showing a lack of basic manners too] he pointed out and I scoffed.

"I don't care, you have to admit that what you interpreted was wrong," I still argued as he opened the door with a key card.

[Nope, so let it rest boy scout] he asserted and all I could do was grumble.

"I'll show you good game," I muttered lowly as he just chuckled leading the way.

[Dad I'm home] I heard him call out well his cell-phone did but you get it.

"Kitchen honey," his dad called back as he led me to the kitchen.

"Hey sweetie and Oh... you must be Camryn, I've heard... well relatively something... about you," he addressed me warmly, it felt nice, he felt nice, like a really cool mom yet he was male.

"I hope all good things because duck... Amille can't be trusted."

Yes I almost slipped up in my response.

"All good things... don't worry and yes my son is quite the handful," he replied with a chuckle as Amille glared at me.

[Don't be like that, it's only been a week and everyone knows you're a demanding little devil, don't blame him] he signed but said the words out loud for me, I could tell.

[I don't care, he's the one who can't get away with it] Amille responded and I rolled my eyes.

"Why me short-stack," I questioned and he narrowed his eyes on me.

[Will you stop calling me that in front of my dad too] he argued pointedly.

"You call me a neanderthal all the time," I shot back and he groaned whilst his dad just laughed.

"I see you two have gotten along pretty great. I was worried he wouldn't make any friends but that's changed, I hope on Sunday you'll be here, we're having a family barbecue. I already invited Maxine her family and the boys, you were the only one left," he extended the invite and I gladly accepted with a nod.

"Great, such a good kid, right Amille," he stated and I was very proud of myself.

As Amille rolled his eyes.

[Yeah, right] he replied and we could both tell that response wasn't jovial.

"Okay, so show him around the house, make yourself comfortable Camryn, I hope you're staying for dinner," he addressed both Amille and I.

"I sure hope so, since short-stack over there seems surprised," I teased and Amille glared at me.

[Hey, leave me alone] he protested grabbing a bowl of snacks and juice.

"No can do but I'd love to stay for dinner Mr Laurent," I told him with a smile.

"Oh such a good boy. I'll make you my special ravioli and you can call me Calvin," he announced and I nodded with a grin.

"Honey be nice," he chided Amille who signed a response, I really needed to take a class for that and my wolf was actually in support, it would be easier to talk to him rather than have him on his phone a lot of the time.

[So this is the lounge, my dad designed it, of course I helped, then the dining room, obviously you saw the kitchen, come I'll show you the game room then my studio] he began his tour and I saw the vast difference between his house and mine, ours was beautiful yes, my mother liked clean and decisive colours, the home I was in was vastly different.

The walls had warm colors, different shades and petal patterns that made me chuckle as I traced my fingers on them.

[I painted those the day before yesterday] Amille suddenly stated and I was surprised, he really was good, the texture, the gradient, of course I didn't know much about art but the little I did made me know and realize that Amille was ridiculously talented, it felt machine made.

[You like that, you'll like my studio] he boasted as he led the way to the last door on the right of the hallway we were in.

[Don't mind that] he quickly stated as something about the half covered painting caught my eye.

"I wanna see," I told him and walked over to the painting.

[No, you don't] he argued.

"Duck-face move or I'll throw you over my shoulder and move with you," I warned and he made that duck face defiantly making me scoff.

I grabbed him with one arm, since he couldn't actually scream he hurled tiny fists to my back.

"Come on, my little brother can hit harder than that," I taunted as I pulled away the cloth covering the painting and I gasped, he also stopped massaging me with fists.

It was a painting of me, it felt so real, the detail was astonishing since he put it in colour, I remembered the day I had been fixing the car I was testing out, I'd brought it to school, it had an oil leak so some of it spilled on my hands but then to capture this, it left me stunned.

He had captured me actually fixing the car but then I didn't have the car on school property later that day, I just got on school premises to clean the oil off.

"How did you..." I was still shocked.

He maneuvered himself into my hold one hand on his back, whilst his arms hung on my neck, legs around my waist.

He grabbed his cell-phone and typed with one hand.

[I saw the car in the morning, then saw you with oily hands in the afternoon, wasn't hard to put two and two together and I kind of guessed you're a cars kind of guy] he explained and I was in awe.

How special can someone get.

"Wait you guessed I liked cars, seriously," I asked and he nodded with a chuckle.

[And besides you have a camshaft and a spark plug tattoo on your arm, dead give away really] he retorted and I couldn't help laugh.

"You are one of a kind duck-face," I whispered with a smile, then we both looked at each other, the urge to kiss him undeniable but then, it was way too early.

So he cleared his throat and I awkwardly put him down.

So we just stood there, I held his hand in mine.

"Thank you, it's beautiful," I told him and he nodded with a smile I knew held more emotion than anything he'd ever tell me.

"Sorry to interrupt, but dinner is ready," Calvin, Amille's dad announced as we turned abruptly, I still held his hand and for sure Amille was blushing.

[Come on, my dad's ravioli is the best] he quickly announced with his phone as he dragged me off past his dad, it felt nice how he didn't slip away his hold but kept it there, it was nice.

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rossithepixie · 11 months

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Oh oh! The posts about fucking with tourists reminded me of a thing. It wasnt so much that i fucked with a tourist as much as i was simply an autistic 12 year old sick of being inconvenienced. Theres no real point to this but it’s an amusing memory to me.

Now most of my life was spent in a smaller city that until more recent years i’d barely classify it as such. It’s known for a yearly festival it holds and we would literally attract tourists from other countries (why you’d come to us and not the country that what is essentially a heritage festival is based on is beyond me. We get a fair amount of Japanese tourists every year but i digress.)

My home town hasn’t exactly grown with the rising numbers of tourists though. So for two weeks every spring traveling there is a nightmare if you’re a local just trying to live your daily life. It’s loud and crowded and driving anywhere sucks.

So it’s the very end of it, i think it was technically over actually, so my dad took me to an icecream place down town. And over my icecream I’m complaining about all of the above and declare that i hate tourists. My dad looks at me like he’s about to tell me to keep it down when a pair of old women at a table not far from ours indignantly declare themselves to be tourists.

Now keep in mind i’m already preteen here and my give a shit meter is skewed and then you combine it with being autistic?

So i look at her with an expression that is probably the definition of unimpressed. “Yeah and? I hate tourists.” And the looks on their faces were priceless. They’re looking at my dad like they expect me to get in trouble. Now if it was my mom I probably would have been but my dad as much as he probably wanted me to be quiet also hates tourists so he does nothing. They looked like they wanted to blow a gasket.

So im conclusion i got to be initially unintentionally rude to a couple of tourists followed by being intentionally rude when they stuck their noses into my conversation making them yet another example in a long two weeks of tourists being annoying in my 12 year old mind.

#the pixie speaks #again no real point to this

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merlecfmclass · 2 years

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Wiki 10: Making Connections: Critical Reflection

Stage One: How these topics changed my thinking

Disabling Spaces, World Views and Systems of Knowledge, Representation

As I took this course, I found that a lot of ideas or lines of thinking that I had been aware of, prior, were expanded upon. Up until this point, I hadn't been asked to critically think about any of these ideas in such depth. Most of my information has been pieced together over the years or come to mind as something I didn't quite know enough about to word. I really enjoyed getting to closely examine and discuss this for the first time.

The topic Disabling Spaces really surprised me. I hadn't ever used the term disabling within the context of culturally disabling a space, nor had I heard it defined as the disabling effects of society. The mechanisms behind what makes a space disabling had also not been something I'd explicitly discussed before and I now feel more aware of that looks like in my day-to-day life, and of how my friends and family may have experienced that. It helped show me the scope of how consequential design, when being made with assumptions, can be to a person's quality of life. While I did pick up on this in high school and utilise it when making my art board, I thought about it more abstractly at the time. In addition to that, how design can exclude certain customer-bases. The social consequences outside of consumerism wasn't something I explored.

World Views and Systems of Knowledge had a lot of different material which I enjoyed all of, but for different reasons. The documentary Artefact reminded me of how little I know about New Zealand history, and how it only started to enter my radar in the last few years. I was familiar with the idea of museums and colonisers taking artifacts without permission but didn't have a grounded example of what that looked like in New Zealand - the extent of taonga that had been taken away. Seeing the part with Paikea at the end was gut-wrenching. As someone who might want to work within galleries and museums in the future, It made me more suspicious of that career path. I don't want to enable those power dynamics that I saw in the documentary. Additionally, Richard F Sennett's writing was eye-opening. I think I'm a victim of the textual intelligence over practiced skills mentality, and reading the piece was validating. I want to look more into this.

Representation

highschool (mention art board - representing organic food and bugs as normal products)

hadn't critically examined something like a globe before as I'd taken it for granted

yet again drives home what it means to be a maker - consequences!

can't finish this off have to go back to class

THREE SENTENCES

World views and systems of knowledge:

This topic explored how different values and ideas we are brought up with impact and shape our perspective surrounding how we handle and prioritise knowledge.

Disabling Spaces

This topic engaged with the idea that spaces, be they social, cultural or physical, can be built on assumptions and create exclusionary environments, intentionally or unintentionally.

Representation

This topic had us examine the roles of different representations that are present in our lives; the accuracy of the representation, its intended purpose and possible effect it has.

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ceruleanchillin · 3 years

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Honeymoon Headcanons: Mayans Edition

Characters: Angel, Coco, EZ x F!Reader

Miami (Angel)

It wasn’t difficult at all to decide where the two of you would take your honeymoon. When you weren’t gonna be naked, Angel wanted you in sundresses and bikinis. You wanted him in linen shirts, and to feel him up in a club. Couple that with you both wanting a tropical environment, and Miami it is.

Angel letting you handle the accommodations, because you seem to know more about what you wanna see/where you wanna go than he does. He only cares about a bed and shower for when he’s not taking you in the inappropriate places. He just hands over the cash, though he complains about his hurt wallet.

Angel hard as a rock when he sees your new name on your plane ticket.

The two of you nearly missing your flight because your husband needs to “show his wife he loves her”.

You babying him on the flight, because Angel has never flown anywhere before.

“Mami, it’s perfectly valid to feel like a flying toaster can’t safely get you anywhere but a casket. Which they can’t even put you in, because you’ll be everywhere!”

Cue you distracting him with kisses and dirty words in his ear, which gets you initiated into the Mile High Club

Barely making it into the cute little condo before the two of you are at it again, collapsing in the late hours to jet lag and mutual satisfaction.

Your first official day is spent dragging Angel around the humid streets. Knowing he stresses easily if you plan things too tightly, and wanting to wing it yourself. It’s surprising how well you to fit in, it almost feels like home.

Angel switching from being jealous, because your tiny cotton sundress is attracting more than just his attention, to him kissing all over your dewy skin because so much of it is visible.

You getting as jealous as Angel, because it seems like each place you drag him to has openly interested ladies. It’s the white linen shirt that he won’t fully button no matter how many times you try to make him.

Angel basking in the attention, and even playing it up to force you to be the one to initiate inappropriate public sex.

Smirking when you break after a woman pays for his (and unintentionally yours) order at a small cafe you stepped into and you snap and drag him to a hidden place.

“I only love you querida, mi alma.” he whispers in your ear when he bottoms out inside you.

You two are a beautiful couple. Photogenic as all hell. Alone, neither of you have a problem attracting interest, but together, you make people want to be seen around you. That’s why you have no problem club hopping to all the exclusive places.

Angel taking photos and videos of you dancing because he’s so enthralled. He can’t wait to show your kids one day when they ask why he fell for you, and he explains how full of life you are.

Getting enough liquor in Angel to get him dance somewhere away from the club, especially since he (lies) and says he can’t.

You and Angel competing to see who can get the most people to buy your drinks + the two of you losing track because you both get drunk.

A quickie in the coatroom is the prize, Angel fucking you to the hypnotic beat.

Spending a few hours apart the following day, only to still keep texting and FaceTiming each other until you met up, touch starved, at a small restaurant.

Deciding to spend the rest of the day at your Airbnb laid up under each other after Angel scores weed. Teasing Angel about his monetary complaints when you spend all night enjoying the small backyard pool.

Angel thanking God for getting an adventure loving woman as his soulmate when you wake him up the next afternoon to inform him you rented jet skis for the day.

You being impressed when, while jet skiing, Angel silver tongues your way into an invitation to a nearby yacht party out of the host.

FaceTiming Gilly to make him jealous that you two are doing Hookah and drinking Casamigos in a hot tub.

Angel ramping up the mockery when EZ and Coco appear on screen, attracted by Gilly’s whining. Everyone looking overworked and salty, while you and Angel are living your best non-sober lives.

Slipping away from the party to one of the rooms on the boat, because once again, you and Angel never know when to stop teasing each other before it ends up in sex.

Feeling bold enough to suggest that since Angel’s been documenting so much of the trip, that maybe he should film this too.

The aftermath being a surprisingly sweet series of kisses and confessions where the two of you express how thankful you are to have found each other. How you can’t wait to build a forever together.

Marfa + Roswell (Coco)

No one knew how you got Coco to agree to travel for your honeymoon until you finally revealed where you were going. Splitting a week between Marfa and Roswell.

You and Coco are that “weird” conspiracy, incense, and weed couple, so it makes sense.

Giving Coco an edible before you leave, because like Angel, he doesn’t fuck with air travel like that.

“They got me with that bullshit in the military, but that was out of my control. You askin’ a lot right now, you’re lucky you’re cute mujer.”

Coco getting progressively handsy during the flight as the edible hits. Eventually, you stop fake-fighting his neck kisses and forward touches.

Also like Angel in that he’s unafraid to become a member of the Mile High Club.

The ride from the El Paso airport, to the car rental place, to Marfa takes far longer than Coco would like.

He’s used to long stretches of trip on his bike, and when you notice him becoming antsy, you distract him with interesting facts about Marfa.

The entire time, Coco can’t help but think that you’re the perfect road trip co-pilot, only to realize he actually meant his life in general now.

Coco proud as hell when you fall in love with his accommodations choice like he did. The colorful airstream trailers of the El Cosmico hotel are the two of you through and through.

You both trying to be responsible adults and refresh after travel, but continuing to get lost in each other during the whole process.

Shower sex -> Making out while drying off -> Touching while searching through your bags for something to wear -> bed sex -> repeat

Looking thoroughly mauled when you finally manage to get Coco off of you and into the car in search of food the next afternoon.

Coco being happy you can’t cover up due to the heat, while you wonder what superpower he and his boys have that let them wear flannel and long sleeves in the heat.

Dragging Coco to a cute cafe you saw on instagram, and him knowing, by the hipster design of it, that his wallet is about to cry.

Stealing food from his plate, and laughing at him sucking his teeth and whining when he catches you.

“You’re stuck with me forever now Johnny sooo….get used to this.”

“Small price to pay for that I guess.”

Finding small shops to go to and being Siamese twins in every one. Coco showing he has good taste in a lot of things one might think he wouldn’t. Him opening up his wallet at everything you 'ooh' and 'aww' at. He can’t help it, he likes you happy, and your kisses and adoring looks are addicting.

For almost everything you get, Letty gets something too. Neither of you wants that tantrum when you get back.

You fighting yourself to avoid the art supply store, and Coco not having it.

“I have so many supplies already, it’s an addiction at this point.”

“So? Get some more. It’s our week, we shouldn’t stress about shit.”

Coco bragging on your talents and successes to the art shop cashier when you checkout.

“Cocoooo.” you murmur hiding your face in his shoulder, arms around his waist.

“Don’t be shy ma, you’re fucking amazing. I love your skills.”

Cue the cashier swooning at the two of you.

Finding unique liquor stores and getting tipsy on samples. It becomes twice as fun when locals, and other tourists alike, start discussing the Marfa lights with you, and you and Coco impress everyone with your ideas.

Being invited to a bonfire smoke session with the other El Cosmico guests when you get back.

Sketching Coco by the firelight, because he’s the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen in that moment, and now he’s officially yours.

The sex being on another level of intimate that night, because all day you and Coco have been engaging in your respective love languages, and it culminates in mutual need for each other.

The drive to Roswell being more tolerable for Coco, but he still misses his bike. Your excitement about AlienFest is so palpable however, he quickly forgets.

Your hotel being more conventional, but the people you meet making up for it. Finally, you and Coco aren’t the weirdest ones in the room.

Taking the time before the festival starts to check in with friends and family and accumulate odd souvenirs for them. You believe Coco is intentionally getting them stuff they’ll hate.

“Taza won’t wear that baby, he has better taste in jewelry than UFO earrings.”

“Ok, but can he bitch about us not getting him anything? Plus, you can guilt anyone into anything.”

Doing cute edible pastries at the festival.

“You know Aliens are demons right? Jack Parsons and L. Ron Hubbard were doing summoning rituals in the Mojave in 1946, and Roswell was the following year.”

“Word?…Shit. Tell me that again when we’re not rolling. I wanna read about it………you’re so smart mami.”

Coco realizing between every snack stop, every dance he shares with you, every trinket you pick up, and every little conspiracy tidbit you share, that you’re his wife now. That the peace he’s been feeling all week, that he thought he’d never have, is going to be his new normal.

New Orleans (EZ)

You and EZ both enjoy engaging with history and culture, and felt that your honeymoon should be built off of your shared interests. During your meticulous wedding planning, it was decided New Orleans would be the honeymoon destination. It didn’t hurt that you missed your southern roots too, even if you weren’t from New Orleans.

Traveling with EZ is a dream considering you’re both pretty organized, together people. He’s not afraid of flying, but you’re always a little nervous.

EZ being Best Husband™️ and soothing even the most minor of your stresses by turning your attention to the excitement of your trip and your new relationship status.

Teasing EZ in-flight won’t get you Mile High Club initiated, because he finds it much more entertaining to punish you by letting you work the both of you up, and making you stay that way for the duration of the flight. He’s got enough will power to suffer through it, because your soft whines make it worth it.

The airbnb is everything it was promised to be, and you’d appreciate that later, but all you can think of is your husband when you step through the door. That’s the other half of why EZ likes to leave you waiting. Your aggression and exclusive desire for him gets, and keeps, him hard.

It rains the following day, which is just as well, because neither of you are quite ready to stop physically expressing your love for each other. The day consists of ordering food, falling out of your clothes and onto each other, separating to read, falling back on each other, and quick naps.

Angel sending mocking texts in your Reyes group about how you’re trying to turn his brother bamma like you, only to stop when you threaten him with no souvenirs.

EZ and you taking responsibility for your own tour because let’s face it, you both know exactly what you want to see, and can plan a more satisfying tour for the both of you. You take turns deciding where to go next.

When it’s his turn, EZ picks an art museum, and can’t quit smiling about it. You think it’s because he picked a place he really wanted to go to.

“Babe, I have a surprise for you.”

“What?” your excitement always makes EZ’s heart race with his own.

He hands you the guide brochure he picked up at the door, folded to the section he wants you to look at.

“Faith Ringgold exhibit?!”

He hums and nods, grunting when you knock into him with a hug.

“Thank you for thinking of me. I love you.” you look up at him, eyes shining with unshed tears and he just kisses you, afraid he’ll cry if he says anything.

The two of you avoid the tourist trap spots for lunch and find a cute family owned cafe. You order for the both of you based on what you know about southern cuisine and both of your tastes.

You love watching EZ fall in love with the food as he keeps asking “Can you make this?” about everything he eats.

The two of you walking through the Garden District in the evening. Hands swinging between you with no plans but to admire the beautiful homes and foliage.

EZ noting how awestruck you are, and you describing what you love about the historic, towering homes.

He catches that when you describe what your dream home in the area would be, he and your future children are mentioned frequently, and it makes butterflies dance in his stomach. He can picture your family in the yards around him.

The two of you almost make it back to your Airbnb, but give into your baser urges after all the domestic conversation. EZ pulls you into an alley for a quickie, the two of you fighting to silence the other’s vocal expression.

You teasing EZ after that he’s more like his brother than he thinks. Him teasing back the two of you would’ve been caught and arrested if he was like Angel.

The following day is relaxed and less planned. The both of you getting thoughtful gifts for each member of your family, blood and otherwise. EZ scores major points for the gifts he suggests for your mom and dad, and you kind of want to jump him again.

EZ is glad you’re impressed, but it’s nothing to him. It all comes naturally because he loves you so much, and refuses to be anything other than the husband he knows you deserve.

AN:

I didn’t want to add this, cuz I wanted to end on a sweet note, but you just know Angel would accidentally send that vid to one of his boys.

Personally, I lose it for shit like this. Anything domestic in writings is my jam, so I decided to make these headcanons.

- Fun fact: Jet Ski is kind of like Bandaid in that it’s become the generic term for “personal water vehicles”, but it’s actually a specific brand’s name for their PWVs. I learned this while writing this enjoy💀.

#mayans mc #mayans imagine #angel reyes #angel reyes x reader #coco cruz #coco cruz x reader #ez reyes #ez reyes x reader #reader insert #angel reyes imagine #coco cruz imagine #ez reyes imagine

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emblemxeno · 3 years

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Fire Emblem Fates: Dragon Degeneration, Anankos’ Story and the Fallen Corrins

(Spoilers for Fates below. Warning: This post is long)

One thing that makes me think that a good portion of people who say things like “Blarghh Fates bad so many missed opportunities and wasted potential” are people who just haven’t played the game in years or just choose to ignore anything or everything the game may have done right is the “Corrin’s transformation/dragon heritage is never brought up in the plot and they never deal with those issues after chapter 5″.

And while, yeah, I would’ve liked for the characters to comment more on it or for some kind of acknowledgement (especially from the characters who weren’t there to see them transform), but the entire plot thread wasn’t thrown out. Not only that but FEH isn’t making up for what Fates didn’t do. It was there the whole time.

The dragon degeneration aspect in Fates is dealt with Anankos. He loved humanity, but his natural instincts started to well up inside until he lost control and burnt down a forest; a disaster he caused whether intentionally or not. Humans blamed him for it, which planted the seed in his brain that mankind only saw him as a mindless monster, even after all that he had done for them. He isolated himself in a cave, where his mind deteriorated more and more. The few people who still believed in him (Cadros and his crew) tried their best to make things right, but Anankos was too far gone; in his rage he killed them. Before losing himself completely he tore part of his soul away, creating the good half of himself who went on to become Corrin’s father.

This talk of Fates’ “wasted potential” in regards to Corrin’s dragon heritage came back with both Fallen Corrins releasing in FEH, where they deal with their blood going crazy and making their animalistic urges grow; in essence, it’s almost like they’re starting to degenerate themselves.

Notice the circumstances of why Corrin transformed in the first place. Corrin loves people and their world, but boy does the world immediately hate them. They were put through repeated heartache and emotional whiplash just in the first 6 chapters; first time in the outside world in many years, they lose Gunter on their first mission, suddenly they’re in Hoshido, they learn their home of many years isn’t as great as they thought, with strangers claiming to be their family with an especially kind and generous mother, then said mother dies while protecting them. (Not typical degeneration yes, but then again Corrin isn’t a typical dragon in the Fates world. Just their emotions alone triggered a partial transformation after Hans knocked Gunter off a cliff) They are unwittingly responsible for bringing destruction to Hoshido during chapter 5, and only calm down when a Vallite royal uses the pendant in combination with Lost in Thoughts to quell their urges. Then Takumi lashes out and blames them for everything (not blaming pineapple boy, just providing the parallel), and how does Corrin respond? By offering to leave; to isolate themselves from the people who loved them.

All that sound familiar? The story with Corrin’s dragon heritage and the turmoil that comes with it is note for note like their father’s.

But going further, the Fallen versions of them in Heroes mention something incredibly important: that their siblings and friends helped them quell their draconic urges. Their connections with people saved them from going down the same route as Anankos did.

But what happens when their dragon power is going out of control like in Chapter 5 of Fates? What happens when they don’t have dragonstones with them to help contain it? What happens when they unintentionally remove a huge part in why they’re able to suppress themselves by not going near people in fear of hurting them?

You get their Fallen Variants.

Their emotions are unhinged, as we see them succumb to rage, fear, melancholy and self-doubt. They deeply regret hurting Azura the way they did. They ask people multiple times to kill them if they lose themselves completely.

Female Fallen Corrin is constantly feeling physical pain, like searing flames in her body that won’t go away. She prays constantly to whatever gods are out there for peace within herself, and wonders if the summoner can suppress her power. Male Fallen Corrin hates being treated like a mindless beast instead of the Corrin everyone knows him as. He isolates himself in a forest because he fears he’ll hurt his loved ones before learning that he’s already hurting himself and everyone else by forcing himself to be away from them (with help from Smol Azura).

All of the above is reminiscent of what Anankos went through and further drives home how Corrin was able to escape the fate that Anankos suffered, all because they had the most integral part of their character-their connections with others-to pull them back from the brink. (and of course had their dragonstones with them lol)

They’ve “fallen” not only because it calls back near perfectly to how their father fell, but also because they lack what makes the Corrins who they are: support from their loved ones.

Sorry that this post is kind of a mess, I just kept writing and writing with no clear point other than “Fates did cool things and Heroes referenced those cool things, but people mistakenly think that Heroes is making up for what Fates lacked”. So it just kind of became a stream of consciousness think piece lol. And I know that you could chalk up any one of these individual things as coincidence or that IS weren’t thinking of that when they made the Fallen variants and it just happened to turn out that way, but y’know? Not only do I think too many things are similar and fit just right for it to not be intentional, I honestly don’t care if it was or not. It can be deliberate or an accidental stumble into genius, I will praise it the same regardless.

#fire emblem #fire emblem fates #corrin fire emblem #male corrin #female corrin #anankos fire emblem #fe14 #hoshido #nohr #valla #azura fire emblem

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whimsywispsblog · 3 years

Text

Abducted

Pairing: Adler x Reader

Words: 1115

"FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR 'GREATER GOOD' BULLSHIT, ADLER!" (Y/N) spat, turning away from him angrily. Adler let out a low growl, grabbing his sunglasses, walking away from his partner, and harshly shut the door behind him.

This was the 100th fight the couple had since the previous month after Adler killed Bell despite (Y/N) telling him not to. They had assisted the team with Bell's MK-Ultra. They had seen what it does to the subject and how it tears them down- losing their identity, losing their will and being forced to fit a mould that Adler wanted. Not just that, they had also helped Mason temporarily break away from the effects of MK-Ultra that he was forced to endure, and it was the most horrible thing they'd ever witnessed.

Of course, (Y/N) was definitely aware of the importance of war crimes and how working with the clandestine operatives meant they had to shed or suppress their humanity. But it could have been avoided. Bell could have been more of an asset than a liability. Their point was proven when Bell gave the correct answer- Solovetsky, which was, unfortunately, their key to the afterlife. An unfair death. Adler had always warned them on how they were never supposed to get emotionally compromised with their assets, but for (Y/N), a person who deals with a shit ton of emotions and minds of different people- broken soldiers, lost children and crestfallen prisoners of war and many more.

But today, the fight of humanity versus the necessary war crimes had gone so far that Adler had intentionally (or unintentionally) told them that they 'don't belong to the CIA'. What a horrible thing to say to someone who had lived their life on the field?!

(Y/N) sat down dejected and miserable. 'What if Adler was right? What if I am not good enough and am just pulling the group back because of my emotions?' As more questions buzzed through their mind, (Y/N)'s attention was drawn to the opening of the doorknob. Thinking that it was Adler, they looked away, quickly wiping off their tears. But it was then that they realised it wasn't Adler, but someone else: A stranger wearing a mask. And before (Y/N) could react, the man lunged at them, pinning them down. (Y/N) tried to kick and bit, but all was useless for the man was much stronger and bigger. With one smack from the butt of his gun, he knocked them out and hastily carried them away, shoving them into a van.

Adler returned home after a long drive with a tub of ice cream for (Y/N). He knew that he crossed the line this time and that maybe he should have been calmer and less arrogant when telling (Y/N) his side of the story. After all, it was understandable why they both would never meet eye-to-eye on the topic of MK-Ultra: He was an operative, and to him, MK-Ultra is just a tool to get closer to his target. For (Y/N), however, MK-Ultra was like Death's Scythe, which she had to shield and undo from several POWs that came home.

As he parked in front of his home, something was different. The door was left opened ajar. H clearly remembered closing it behind him, and if (Y/N) had to go out somewhere, they would have shut it, not left it open. Pulling his spare pistol from under his seat, Adler carefully walked into his house stealthily and quietly. No mess, except for the dining table and the chairs. And a few drops of blood.

Hasty kill. Quick, not very precise.

Adler's stomach dropped. (Y/N) wasn't there at home. They could be out there anywhere and maybe in danger! He quickly rushed to his satellite phone, dialling a number.

"Sims, they've got (Y/N). Call the rest of the team and see if you can find something and look through the CCTV footage. I'll be in Langley in 5."

"Yep, must be an amateur. A poorly executed kidnap plan." Said Sims, looking through the footage. "Ha! The asshole has parked in front. Lemme see if I can get the numbers on the plate," Sims chuckled. On any other Occasion, Adler would have smirked or shaken his head at the stupidities. Still, today, he just couldn't dwell into the humour of the situation.

"Alright, let me see if the rest of the cameras on the roads have tracked this number plate," He said, looking into another tab and dialling Hudson, reporting the findings to him.

"Sims, Adler. We've found it," Hudson said, walking into the room towards Adler after an hour. "It is an abandoned house, 2 hours away from the traffic."

"I'll get there in an hour," Adler said, taking the address from Hudson.

(Y/N) looked around groggily. The bright lights hurt their eyes, and their mouth felt dry and hot. Coughing and wheezing, they finally adjusted to their surroundings. It was dusty and dirty. And hot. They were tied up, and they could hardly move.

The man walked towards them, his mask still on. He leaned over (Y/N), his hands on either side of them.

"So this is Adler's little pet, eh?" He chuckled darkly, looking them up and down. He caressed their face roughly, but (Y/N) bit their nose hard, making the man scream in pain. His hand in their hair, he pulled them off his nose. (Y/N) bit off a chunk and spat it out, blood smeared all over their mouth. The man touched his aching nose softly, groaning a little and walked towards (Y/N), landing a harsh blow to their face.

The man kneeled next to (Y/N), his knee on top of their wrist, putting enough pressure to make them shout. He grabbed their face and was about to land another blow, but before he could, a bullet grazed through his arm, making him wince in pain.

"Fuck me," He groaned, looking at his arm.

"With pleasure," Said another voice who shot the man in the head, making his blood splatter over (Y/N) as he lay dead.

"Adler, I thought I said ', do not kill the kidnapper!' We needed to interrogate-!"

"Cry me a river," Adler said, walking towards (Y/N) and untying them. "You alright?"

"Yeah." (Y/N) said, wrapping their hands around Adler. His smoky-musky scent helped them calm down, along with the gentle rubs. Planting a soft kiss on their forehead, Adler looked at them with a gentle smile.

"Let's go home?"

"Yes, please. Can we get some ice cream on the way?" (Y/N) said as they up with Adler's help.

"I bought an entire tub. Mint chocolate."

"My favourite!" (Y/N) squealed, nuzzling their face in Adler's neck.

#russell adler x reader #russell adler #cod bo cold war #cod bo cw #call of duty cold war

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thebestsandiever · 3 years

Text

Regarding the chaos and aftermath of the Verstappen crash at the 2021 British GP

Before I begin, this is solely my own thoughts on the crash and aftermath of it, resources and intel being from various news reports, articles, interviews, social media reactions/on track fans reactions, commentators, careers etc. Also important, this post was made around 11 PM CEST, so other news after that or in the midst of this, I haven’t considered.

Comments and discussions are welcome, though remember to keep the tone guys. I rarely comment on anything on Tumblr, but looking at this chaos, I felt like sharing a bit.

Starting on the incident that happened, I don’t believe that I can clearly decide what happened and who caused, and the only comments I have is that I believe it was a racing incident that has no bad intention. We hear in conclusion from sources (there was an after analysis) (e.g. also Lewis’ Sky Sports interview) that both could have given each other space. Lewis trying to get in, and Max defending his position. People who think Lewis did it intentionally clearly have no common sense, no one wants Max to end up going to the hospital (but he is fine so no worries). Of course, nothing excuses that a crash happened, and it’s a big shame.

All the hate Lewis is getting should tone down, I think it’s fair to be critical in perspective of racing which consists of the crash and his comments regarding it, but anything that comments on something other than that with negativity, shouldn’t be.

Something that many F1 fans have brought up and Horner I believe (slightly) is Lewis 15+ years of experience in Formula one and numerous of championships. Which I think in any sport or topic isn’t a fair argument, because mistakes happen to anyone, no one is immune to that, though this is not me calling the crash a mistake, because I don’t believe that is the right word. It’s more Lewis knowing the danger of closing in and Max of course defending himself on track, and this is the end result. And if anyone was a viewer of the Euro 2020 Football Cup Finals, it’s a bit like the Southgate criticism on the penalties.

This also applies to all the fans who bring up Max’ aggressive and old nickname “crashstappen” from his early F1 career. Whether you have your impression from Netflix’ Drive to Survive or the fact that you’re new, anyone will agree that Max has matured greatly both on and off track, in my opinion one of the calmest drivers on the grid considering the amount of criticism, hate and burden that he gets/has. The fact is that there have been some people on Twitter (when I now and later comment on fans and reactions, it’s usually the very chaotic Twitter), that mentions Verstappen’s past, the infamous Baku and this season’s races where Lewis is the one who, in their words, “has backed up and gave space” (the reason I say their words is because I can’t quite remember so I won’t say that I know for sure). But again, as I mentioned, this is not valid, because it doesn’t excuse what happened today. Every track is a title fight, and previous races and tactics doesn’t apply to this. What I mean is that because Lewis gave space previous races, does it mean that Verstappen should crash? Or worded differently, because Max didn’t give space like he has previous times, that “it was coming” or that he should crash? Biggest takeaway from this is that past and future shouldn’t mean more than what happened in the present. This leading me on to a bit of the hate Max got which I think was quite undeserving, especially under his circumstances, which is f1 fans (mostly Twitter) calling it “karma” and using his young past to somehow “justify” the crash.

Also I really disliked the videos of “British fans” (we can’t actually determine that all were British, but it was home track) cheering when the crash happened, but in general I think cheering on a crash will always be awful even if you’re favourite driver gains position. Gladly though, it quickly died down on the stands as they realized it was hard impact. Very Euro 2020 vibes, though a much better English crowd- Just kidding, maybe you can see I’m not happy when any kind of fans act out of order (also I don’t hate English football fans, but sadly, the ones who make stupid actions overshadow the rest).

Now I also want to comment a bit on the drivers and teams’ comments and the PR.

So regarding Max’ social media post about the race. I honestly think it’s fair for him to be upset, no one wants to be taken out on the first lap considering that he is leading while a VERY good and competitive Lewis is trailing behind. My first reaction was that it was quite an aggressive post and the part about him unfollowing Lewis (if that is correct, I haven’t seen it myself yet) was obviously implying that he isn’t happy. Though, emotions run high as well does Lewis’ celebration reaction. I know his mind is to win on track and he has always been outspoken about that fact. Also I don’t quite believe that Max’ comments were full heartedly himself, but the PR team considering he’s just been at the hospital. I’m not happy with his post at all, but I understand both from a PR perspective and a driver’s. I believe almost any driver on the track would have said something like that in an interview if it happened to them. This just happened to be online because of health circumstances.

Regarding Marko and Horner, I must disagree with their aggressiveness or at least the way they decide to comment on it. I do understand the anger, considering the championship but also concern for Max (anyone who knows their relationship knows that they care about him.) Again, I have to say emotions run high and if anything, managers are good at, and this is not specifically only attacking Horner, but it’s stirring up tension. I would say it’s fair for him to say, and quite expected, not saying I think it’s fair for Lewis to receive though (hopefully you get what I mean).

Commenting a bit on Lewis’ Sky Sports F1 interview, we can confirm he didn’t know about Max going to the hospital before celebrating. Anyone who wins has the right to celebrate, especially at home, so props for his win, though unfortunately through a crash (this meaning Verstappen was his biggest threat on track). Though I wasn’t pleased about the commenting on Max. This leads further into the interview.

We get Lewis’ insight on the incident and where he sees Max as the aggressive one, both not giving each other space and having the crash as end result. So in conclusion, Max trying to defend his position and Lewis trying to get in, fair. Please watch the interview, because it clears up a lot of what is spoken about in the media.

My thoughts on Lewis’ response both before and after hearing about Max going to the hospital in the Sky Sports interview, is that he probably could’ve/should’ve toned down on Max being the aggressor, as they were both considering what the crash led to, and him saying that it was just about who was going to give space until it was too late. It kind of goes against what he just said. But I do agree that Lewis has the right to celebrate because he simply won. I also liked that he had championship spirit saying that considering what happened, it didn’t take the shine away from his win. It may sound disrespectful, and I do still kind of think it is, but on the other side, it’s him being competitive, and both drivers have each other’s respect on being able to fight on track. So he’s got the spirit, just maybe not the right interview to show the most competitive spirit (I think the most competitive spirit/response he’s shown this 2021 season)

A bit more on his spirit and fighting on track is seen from Lawrence Barreto who tells us that Lewis has the “game on” spirit and is ready for attacks on track but there needs to be respect on track “and if not this will happen more often I guess.” - Lewis. Just a bit more closure from another source, I like that he is more responsive, but this does make it sound like he blames Max for it. I think any driver who are up against each other have the right or it makes sense to give the majority of the blame to the other, they have their own rear mirrors (see it from their own perspective when they drive, quite literally), but it isn’t the best comment to be honest. Since he says himself, both could’ve given space.

My biggest disagreement that I must mention is the penalty Lewis got, which was the 10 second penalty. Assessing the severity of the crash with high speed, 51G impact, first lap etc. I think the penalty didn’t really serve much of a penalty, but this is also me being critical of the penalty system. These 10 second penalties don’t really make you lose that much of position (depends on car), also this is not a blow at Lewis but just the system. Afterwards, he was also given 2 penalty points. I think compared to someone like Yuki who also got 2 penalty points for crossing the white line twice while entering the pits and George yesterday at the Sprint Race (1 penalty point + 3 place grid penalty) are quite different but looking at the number, there isn’t a big difference in what’s given. But all of this penalty talk is on the stewards and system, so nothing against Lewis and he did take his penalty that was given.

I did not comment much on the actual incident as I have a hard time really deciding (I can admit I see Lewis unintentionally drift a bit in + this being a very fast turn, I believe just a misjudgment but so many fans think it was intentional), so therefore do read and watch the current and coming interviews and articles to get some racing perspective. It keeps updating and even drivers like Riccardo, Leclerc, Alonso etc. have given their comments, and who better to listen to than professionals themselves. So I encourage you to get perspective there, because I know not all of us are the most technical fans, and we tend to comment by being led through a bias and crowd.

But if we’re feeling a bit tired from today, so far the drivers are leaning towards a racing incident. They speak of it as quite unclear to determine, basically saying that both drivers could’ve done and were doing something --> could’ve given space.

We all have to remember this situation is a big deal since it’s the only two to be fair at the moment, who are competing for the championship. Both mad talented and on each other every track. Media blows it out more than them and before we know it, they’re back to what they do best, which is drive.

Heart goes out to Max, it was quite an impact and if not his worst crash so far in his career. His team radio was quite scary to listen to, I’ve never heard him so shook, but he is doing quite fine at the moment, and he will hopefully recover well enough for the next race.

As well for Lewis, emotions are running high and people are quick to assume and accuse without using common sense that Lewis wouldn’t endanger Max or himself. He has every right to celebrate a win and props for him winning.

In conclusion to those who has taken the time to read, don’t let my thoughts be any decider, but more so a way to understand and be a bit more open minded. We are all subjective in the end and I try to see from both perspectives and to be critical as well, not being led by others’ opinions. I’ve stated my sources, and this is only my overall thoughts at the very moment, so remember, as drivers evolve and move on, we do too.

I again encourage you to watch and research with an open mind so not being led on bias, especially if you’re willing to spread anything on the topic. It serves a greater outcome than sprouting from emotions and lack of information, as we have well seen from this sport. Because media does influence and we as an audience is a part of it. So I must remind again, that this is simply my thoughts.

#f1 #max verstappen #lewis hamilton #british gp 2021 #formula 1 #red bull racing #mercedes #verstappen #hamilton #be open minded

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thealogie · 3 years

Note

Asking in good faith unrelated to Trapper vs. B.J. discourse; what about the MASH text as is suggests that B.J. would show up in Maine and not spend a lot of time catching up on what he missed with Erin? Regardless of Peg and headcanons about their marriage, B.J. seems to consistently care about missing the milestones in her life, and would he not want to make up those moment?

if you want to construct a full satisfying meal out of what the mash text half intentionally (on a friend/meaningful relationship level) and half unintentionally (on the romance level) provides for you, your thought process is just like if someone was giving you certain restraints/criteria and then asking you to write the most logical ending given those restraints/criteria (and this is not just me, multiple of us have connected the dots the same way...including in fics I later found published years before I’d seen the show):

>you watch this whole show and Hawkeye and BJ are the most meaningful people in each other’s lives...every truly touching conversation and story arc is about them, the most satisfying reading of the text is that it’s about two people with Issues TM finding someone who complements them perfectly in the middle of an event they’d give anything to erase from history (war);

>the most satisfying ending is therefore for them to end up together (I mean I can explain why the angsty option ending to this particular story is unappealing but let’s just say we agree on this point for now);

>if you’ve been reading the show gay this whole time, hawkeye has proven over and over that he will NOT disturb BJ’s perfect nuclear family life, he will not show up in California uninvited or ask BJ to go be with him because he’s like “peg and Erin are the world to him, I’d be a monster to take that from the person I love.” Hawkeye will actually push and challenge BJ on everything except the problems in his marriage...the marriage is treated as sacred;

>there are hints of this before but the finale really drives home that Hawkeye thinks this is goodbye and BJ is still holding back (“there’s something we might want to say” but he doesn’t say it; “maybe one year we’ll come out...”; the script explicitly saying he doesn’t WANT to say goodbye to Hawkeye) so all Hawkeye is getting is “the most you’re getting from BJ is a proper goodbye.”

>as an act of love (and an apology for not leaving a note), BJ (who doesn’t want to say goodbye) leaves it as a note for Hawkeye but he promises to see him back in the states

>it looks like (and the script confirms) that Hawkeye doesn’t hear BJ’s promise and just sees the goodbye confirmation

>ok, now I have a goal (bj and Hawkeye ending up together) and character restraints (everything leading up to this point pushes Hawkeye to believe (a) BJ would be happy without him and he should leave BJ alone and (b) BJ has said goodbye to him, which is the most he could have hoped for anyway)

>so Hawkeye doesn’t respond to BJ’s letters, doesn’t seek him out, doesn’t think of a relationship with BJ as something possible

>meanwhile BJ has his own realization that he no longer fits into the life he left behind (the war changed him/he’s gay...those two things are synonymous if you’re reading the show on a metaphorical level)

>it’s narratively satisfying for BJ (after being the more closed off one and Hawkeye pushing for them to Talk About It and at least say goodbye!) to be the one doing the chasing this time

>like you said, BJ’s devotion to Peg and Erin isn’t in question either, he’d absolutely spend time with them first/he can’t stay away from them (especially from Erin) for long

>he shows up in Maine for a single weekend (idk that this constitutes missing any milestones in Erin’s life gdjfkfm) to shoot his shot with Hawkeye and then either beg him to come back to California or do long-distance

>Hawkeye and BJ go back to California and raise Erin together with peg and her wife in a really fun sitcom-y untraditional family

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seungmoroll · 3 years

Text

It’s Just a Number | Hui

Word count: 1.9k

Genre: angst, happy ending, hui x younger!reader

Requested: yes

A/n: thank you lovely anon for my first pentagon request! I hope you enjoy it!

To say you were nervous about tonight would be an understatement. Tonight will be the first time your father is meeting your boyfriend, Hui. A friend of yours had been insisting on setting you up on a blind date with their friend, and eventually you got tired of their persistence, and agreed, thinking that if you said yes, they’d finally leave you alone. Honestly, you weren’t expecting much from the date, but now you could say that you were glad that you told them yes because six months later you were now with the very same man that you had been set up with.

While at a stoplight, you take a peek at Hui in the driver seat. He’s anxiously shaking his leg; you can tell that he’s nervous as well. As a way to make him relax, you gently take his hand and give it a firm squeeze. Hui physically relaxes as soon his he feels your touch. He brings your hand to his lips and lays a soft kiss on the back of your hand.

“Nervous?”

“Something like that.”

“Don’t be. I’m sure that they’ll love you.” The look he gives you before he begins to drive off lets you know that he doesn’t quite believe your words.

When the two of you arrive at your house, it takes a moment for the two of you to actually leave the car. You patiently wait as Hui collects himself. Taking a deep breathe, he eventually says, “Okay, let’s go.”

As the two of you wait for your parents to open the door, Hui begins to fiddle with the bouquet of flowers that he’s brought for your mother. When the door opens, you are happily greeted by your mom.

“Y/n! It’s been too long! Have you been eating?” Your mom takes a hold of your face to inspect you. “Mom,” you groan out, “Please let go of my face.” Letting go of you, she finally turns to Hui, “Oh my, I didn’t expect you to bring such a handsome man home. Please come on in!” Stepping into your house, Hui presents the flowers to your mom, “These are for you.” Your mom happily takes the flowers from him, exclaiming that he was such a gentleman.

“Is that Y/n I hear?” The sound of your father’s voice comes from the kitchen. Emerging into the living room, your father quickly goes in for a hug, giving you a tight squeeze. When he let’s go of you, he turns to Hui, and his expression immediately changes into a serious one. Reaching out for a handshake, your father warily takes Hui’s hand. You can tell that your dad was being a bit too firm with the way Hui’s hand trembles.

“It’s nice to meet you sir.”

“Uh-huh.” Glaring at your dad, you elbow him in the side. The room has now gone silent, with only the sounds of your mom in the kitchen being the only noise in the house. You try to think of something to say, but fortunately your mom has good timing because she yells out, “Dinners ready!”

When the four of you are situated at the dinner table, you all begin to dig in. For the most of it, your mother does all the talking, all while your dad glares at Hui. Underneath the table, you rest a hand on Hui’s lap as a way to make him relax, which only helps a bit because you can still feel the way that he’s tense.

“So Hui, Y/n tells us that you’re a producer, how’d you get into that?” Your mom’s question manages to get Hui relaxed. When it came to producing, Hui could easily talk about it for hours, so thankfully your mother brought it up.

“As a child I was always interested in music, so it was an easy choice for me to decide to go into a music career. As for being a producer, I’ve just always like creating my own music, even if I’m not the one performing them.”

“That’s wonderful that you chose to do something you love.” Before anyone else could get another word in, your father speaks up, “I don’t know if this was mentioned, but how old are you Hui?” You knew you were forgetting to tell Hui something, and your father’s question just reminded you of it. You haven’t actually told your parents that Hui was four years older than you. It’s not like it was a big deal or anything, which is why you didn’t mention it, but you knew that your dad didn’t like the idea of you dating older guys because the last time you dated an older guy, he completely broke your heart.

“I’m 27 sir.” The sound of silverware clattering follows Hui’s response.

“27?” Your father is now looking at you, and you do your best to avoid his gaze. Unintentionally, you tightly squeeze Hui’s thigh, causing for him to look at you as well. The sound of a chair scraping against the floor catches your attention, and you see your father getting up from his seat, “I’m sorry Hui, but I think you need to leave.”

“Dad.”

“No, Y/n. I cannot have you dating a 27-year-old.”

“Dad,” you plead.

“Sir-“

“Sweetie-“

“No,” your dad says, cutting off everyone, “I will not accept you dating a guy with a four-year age gap.”

“But dad-“

“I said I won’t allow it, Y/n.” You found it ridiculous how your father wouldn’t let anyone get a word in. While off to the side Hui was completely speechless.

“Dad, you’re being completely unreasonable right now.”

“No, I’m not Y/n. Last time you were with an older guy, he broke your heart and me and your mother had to pick up the pieces. I refuse to see my child go through something like that again.” At this point, you were beginning to grow frustrated with your father. Hui was a completely different guy from your ex, and your father would know that if he only got to know him.

Finally speaking up, Hui speaks to your father, “Sir, I know that Y/n’s last relationship put them in a rough spot, but I promise you, I would never intentionally hurt Y/n like that. I truly love Y/n and hurting them is the last thing I want to do.”

“It’s the last thing I want you to do, which is why I cannot allow for you to date Y/n. I’m sorry, but I’d like for you to leave now.” With that being said, you dad takes his leave, leaving the rest of you stunned. Getting up from his seat, Hui apologizes to your mother, “I’m sorry, I seemed to have ruined dinner.”

“Oh no sweetie, it’s not your fault at all. He’s- He’s just very protective of Y/n, that’s all. I think he just needs some time to digest everything.”

“I should take my leave now I guess.” Hui begins to make his way to the door. Getting up from your chair, you stop him in his tracks, “Hui, wait-“

“No, Y/n, I should just go.”

“Please don’t.” Slowly approaching you, Hui plants a gently kiss on your forehead, “I’ll talk to you later, okay?” He then parts from you, bidding you and your mother a goodbye.

Angry and frustrated, you make your way to your dad. Storming into your father’s office, you ask him, “What was that about?” You could not believe that your father had the audacity to do that to you and Hui.

“I did what I had to do Y/n. I did what was best for you.”

“Best for me? Hui is the best thing that’s happened to me, and now because of you, I might’ve lost him for good.”

“There’s other fish in the sea.” You could do nothing but gawk at your father, “I don’t want just any fish in the sea, I only want Hui.” As the minutes pass, your anger towards your father began to build up. “If you can’t accept the fact that there’s a age gap between me and Hui then I don’t think I should come back home.” Your statement causes for your father to finally turn around and look at you.

“You don’t mean that. Y/n, he’s just another guy.” That’s where your father was wrong. To you, Hui wasn’t just any other guy. You saw Hui in your future, and you weren’t going to let something stupid like an age gap ruin that for you.

“I’m sorry dad, if you can’t accept our relationship, then I can’t come back here.” With that being said, you leave your dad’s office, giving your mother an apologetic look as you leave, to which she sends you an understanding look.

That very night, you call Hui and let him know that you chose to be with him, not caring what your father thought of your relationship. At first Hui had made sure to ask you if you were making the right decision, not wanting to be the reason for there to be a rift between you and your father. You had reassured him that you were 100% with your decision.

It had taken you two weeks for you to talk to your father again. Your mother kept you updated on him, telling you that she was doing her best to change his mind, but unfortunately, she had no luck. Which is why it came as a shock to you when your father had unexpectedly showed up at your door. Silently, you let your father in. When you had shut the door, the first things to come out of your father’s mouth was, “I’m sorry.” Unable to do anything but look at him, you wait for him to say more.

“I know that what happened two weeks ago was out of character for me, but you have to understand, you’re my child and all I want to do is protect you from all the evils in the world.” You knew your father had the best intentions for you, but it didn’t excuse the fact that he was rude to both you and Hui.

“Dad, I understand that, but I’m not a child anymore, I’m a grown adult. I can take care of myself now.”

“I know, but I’m your father. I’m always going to want to protect you.”

“And that’s fine, but you can’t control the people that I date. I love Hui, the difference in our ages doesn’t matter to me. He likes me for me, and I like him for him.”

“I understand that now. Your mother told me the things you told her, and I want to make it up to you and Hui and really get to know him.” Suddenly the door to your apartment swings open, Hui busting through with a bag of food in his hands, “I got take ou-“ He stops mid-sentence as he looks back and forth between you and your father. You can tell by the way his eyes shake that he was contemplating backing out of the room. Quickly, taking his side, you grab a hold of his arm, “Hui, I think there’s something that my father has to say to you.”

Clearing his throat, your father says to Hui, “I think we got off on the wrong foot, and if you let me, I’d like to get to know you better.” It takes a moment for Hui to respond, but when he does, a smile breaks through his face, “I would like nothing more than that sir.”

A/n: yay! my first pentagon request! my requests are open, so if you want to, send something in! these are the groups I write for: x

masterlist

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m0e-ru · 3 years

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eight months in somebody actually asked me abt visualive instead of me immediately annoying ppl about it without former notice. I might actually write properly for once 😳😳😳

OK OK!!!!! In this essay I will.... I will.... Visualive Adachi.... Visu/BURSTS INTO TEARS/

OKAY OKAY for real I just care Visualive so much (as someone who can’t fully understand Japanese AHAHA)

First I’ll add some foundation about what Visualive really is, then I talk abt Adachi in the latter parts of it because this is technically the first time I’m properly talking about this hehe 🐿

T....table of contents???

Visualive

Visualive the Evolution

Masami Itou

Visualive Adachi

Visualive the Evolution Adachi

Terms and Legend

VL - Visualive

VLE - Visualive the Evolution

stage - shortened for “stageplay”

面白い - omoshiroi (it’s just that specific)

Yuuya - VL Hero name

Hayato - VLE Hero name

Baba - Hero

Masami - Adachi

Taniguchi - Dojima

Saotome - Daisuke

Mamiya - Izanami

I add honorifics but sometimes I forget the hyphen intentionally or unintentionally I’m sorry if it makes it hard to read lol

all links have automatic timestamps for easy viewing. i mean. i hope the timestamps work

VISUALIVE “Persona 4.” A stage adaptation of SMT: Persona 4 by Atlus. It adapts the first part of the story, from the hero’s arrival to after recovering Mitsuo Kubo from the TV world. It also ends on a cliff hanger, showing a teaser of Shadow Naoto being projected on the screen.

It takes up a speedy recapitulation of the hero’s spring life, before slowing down and showing in depth his school life in summer. A day before Morooka-sensei’s death, there is a little skit with Kou, Daisuke and Adachi. The hero walks into the conversation before the two other boys leaving, and Morooka-sensei walking in on the student and detective. The next day follow’s the teacher’s death and the Investigation Team (IT) begin investigating their new lead.

From the words “visual” and “alive,” the niche of this stage was meant to be the fusion of live acting and visual digital projections. All seen from the stageplay with the colorful cast of actors and CG animations being projected on the screen. This offers an opportunity for characters to summon their personas, perform cool visual effects, change the backdrop, or even confront their own Shadows.

Performed in Sunshine Theater from the 15th to the 20th of March 2012. The screenplay was written and directed by Shintaro Asanuma from the theatrical group “bpm.” The video production produced by Shutaro Oku, a film director and visual planner. He later takes over as director for VISUALIVE THE EVOLUTION, the sequel stage. The stage music was produced by Shunsuke Wada, with a special show exclusive vocal track sung by Shihoko Hirata.

On this note, I haven’t seen any sort of original soundtrack released for any of the stages and I’m SO SAD. The last song in Mitsuo’s boss fight was such a BANGER and literally EVERYTHING ELSE Marvelous, Wadasan please take my MONEY

Regarding the cast, there were some special accommodations for Teddie, Rise, and Nanako, all of which did not have live actors at the time. During the casting, actors for the three characters could not be found or simply left the directors unsatisfied they couldn’t cast anybody. An exception for Rise, who was able to have a live actor in the sequel stage. It has been stated that there weren’t any “pretty boy” actors that fit the “Teddie Criteria.” While there weren’t any child actors that were believed to portray Nanako well.

Teddie was only ever seen in his bear costume while Rise was busy talking through a call, all voiced by their video game cast. Nanako has never appeared on stage, only being scarcely mentioned in the script. Again, this is different in the sequel stage where her role was extremely important and was shown as a screen projection.

VISUALIVE “Persona 4” THE EVOLUTION. A sequel stage. Beginning abruptly in the middle of Shadow Naoto’s boss fight, the story continues from there until the “true end” of the game’s original story. *Certain characters are introduced while others have been reintroduced. And on a personal note, when it’s all comedic in the beginning, it’s all for what’s coming right after.

I don’t know if I’m salty or just find it really funny AHAHA I might go talk abt it some other day with more context ehehe

Performed in The Galaxy Theater from the 3rd to the 9th of October 2012, only a few months after the PSVITA Persona 4 Golden release, which is July 2012. The screenplay was now written by Jun Kumagi while directed by Shutaro Oku. And music production finally taken over by Shoji Meguro himself.

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HAHAHA this is starting to look like a wiki page. moving on. I might start rambling rn

(warning LONG !!!! aaa,,)

My thoughts on the stage adaptations. For the first Visualive (VL) I believe it’s pretty close to canon! I enjoy the characterization and how much love and care was present when handling the entire production.

Actors were busy playing the game itself, wherein a PS2 was present in the practice room. Along with magazines and game guides explaining the game’s story and the characters itself. Actors performing together and even improv acting together to get a grasp of their characters. All of them knowing well of Persona 4 as a well loved game, delicately handling their characters and hopefully performing them right while making the audience happy.

The staff taking care of each other while the director and video producer, Asanuma-san and Oku-san, working together well to make their vision into a reality.

The same thing happened with VL the Evolution (VLE) and literally every other good stage. Except... I feel the script kinda got out of hand with too much liberty where it feels a bit more disconnected from canon. But! It makes up for it in its content, whether comedic or (INCREDIBLY) dramatic! It’s great as its own story at that point. So in this case, I like to take the first VL and get to connect it canon, while I don’t know what the hell happened in VLE to the point I’ll just enjoy it as its own content.

These opinions deserve its own essay, post whatever bc I have SO much to say abt this. ANYWAY. VL ADACHI

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Tohru Adachi is portrayed by Masami Itou (伊藤マサミ), a screenplay writer, director and an stage actor himself. He does have a single character voice role along with a fellow troupe member in the same franchise, but mostly works as the former three. He is part of Asanuma-san’s entertainment group “bpm.” On a similar note, Masashi Taniguchi, Dojima’s actor, was also part of their group from 2011 to 2016, which may explain their good synergy as the boss and the bumbling fool dynamic. I mean, somebody’s gotta get hit in the head every few skits.

With Masami-san being an important part of the cast, he doesn’t appear as often as Taniguchi-san in backstage content like the VL bonus disk or the official blog. Mentioned in his own personal blog, he had been busy with his roles as assistant director (I am assuming also for VL).

Also fun to note, because his role is mainly comic relief, he has been using his liberty to change up the material almost everyday making each performance exciting. This also leaves some other actors jealous of his freedom in his role, such as Saotome-san, Daisuke’s actor.

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VL Adachi really has a... how do I say this? an adorable speech pattern (THE SAME SPEECH PATTERN THAT DROVE ME MAD TRYING TO DECIPHER I THOUGHT YOU WERE A CITY BOY OSSU OSSU MY ASS /shakes you violently/). Overall, he really fits the loose lipped bumbling fool, and his accent really makes him seem more casual and invested. What I’m saying is... VL Adachi either actually has genuine empathy or he actually has more energy to fake it (compared to some other edgelord. i mean you saw my p4ga analysis. I’m sick of him lol ahaha).

One of my favorite ways to explain this (OTHER THAN CHAIR CAR ADVENTURE MY BELOVED WE’LL GET TO THAT LATER) is the rice field scene with him and Dojima. It’s overanalyzation time 🎉

youtube

(43:04)

While investigating, Adachi whines about being tired while Dojima smacks him in the head. In this case, it’s established that Adachi doesn’t want to be there, yes? It’s the country, it’s hot and it smells like green.

"Ah... Dojima-san..! Why don't we take a break? (...) There really is nothing out here... Is the criminal still even here at all? (...) I wonder if I've passed being a rookie yet. Haha, but this city doesn't even have convenient transportation. I can't go to leisure lands (recreation, amusement parks, arcades, ect.) and head home at all."

Adachi then tries to tell Dojima a story. “when I got to this city after being newly assigned, I met an interesting guy (...) Yeah, I remember that the cherry blossoms haven't bloomed yet. So, I was driving my car and got near the station and--” Dojima gets a phone call.

Adachi politely puts his hands down waiting for his boss to finish so he can finish the story. Again and again, Adachi attempts to talk to Dojima about a story he’s so persistent trying to tell someone about. It was so 面白い that he would find someone to talk to about it. Even being polite and patient enough to wait for a chance to speak. He even gets fed up with it and blows up in front of his boss, clearly irritated he’s not given a chance to talk.

Sure, it could be Adachi feeling fed up like a normal person where someone agreed he to listen to him, before being constantly ignored. Or Adachi trying to be a more annoying whiny brat, depending on where you look at it.

If the story wasn’t too “interesting” to Adachi, he would’ve just brushed it off and stopped talking to Dojima entirely, or start up new small talk, or even complain some more. But no, he had a story he wanted to voice out so bad that he got irritated that the one person in the vicinity couldn’t listen to him.

Only after Dojima told him to continue their investigation elsewhere did Adachi finally stop and focus on something else. Maybe that story was for another day, or maybe it was never meant to be told.

What if it was just original (game) Adachi? He’d find a way to squirrel out of the investigation as usual, or push Dojima to “investigate” elsewhere. “Hey boss, don’t you think it’s hot? Why don’t we go elsewhere? We’ve seen this place too many times to count and I doubt anything new’ll turn up. How about we take a break at Junes, y’know? Where it’s cool? C’mon boss,” something like that.

og Adachi is just really annoying and silly to me. Some grown man thinking he can freeload because he never gets anything out of putting in more energy and effort? I don’t care how tall he is, I will smack him in the head.

Yeah VL Adachi whines, too, but at least it doesn’t look like he’s going to escape and waste his time somewhere else. He just sucks it up stops trying to leave the situation.

Or maybe I’m getting this all wrong and VL is exactly the same and my rage just gets dampened because of Masamisan’s execution of character hmm...

SO. What was his story about anyway? The one he really wanted to share to Dojima?

I mean... it’s obvious enough

youtube

First day in town? Spring? Actually mentioned driving a car when literally out of every single persona 4 media at the time was there not a SINGLE mention of Adachi having a car OTHER THAN the same stageplay it’s being mentioned in?

A story, from somewhere around uhh four? five months ago? was something that he remembered so dearly and was willing to share despite it obviously embarrassing him even if he puts the blame on a certain somebody in the same story?

Or maybe it’s because he really had nothing to talk about ever since he realized all his stories from the city weren’t actually that funny or interesting in the first place.

BUT then that would mean out of all the things he could talk about—more whining, complaining, complimenting, small talk—he insisted about talking about this story in particular.

Okay, look. I’m just. Just. As someone who talks too much, of course I have things I actually want people to hear out of all the bullshit that comes out of my mouth. And if the thing I actually want people to listen to doesn’t even get heard, I’d go mad.

Sure, Adachi’d be fine when his complaints or intentionally unfunny jokes get brushed off. But a story of a guy that he thought was so funny, interesting, 面白い gets ignored, he really blew up, even just for a split second, maybe.

And ALL the things that happened in that story—on his first day in Inaba! His car got dented, he had to deal with a weirdo dumbass employee that knew zero personal space, yelled in his ear, who didn’t know how to do their job, got his station reputation messed up on the first day, got his ass grabbed, got (unintentionally?) mocked for his lame stories, and got his car dented for the SECOND time. Probably MORE

And he STILL wanted to talk about it /punches through concrete wall/

yes I’m overthinking about this of course i am

This little tidbit of VL Adachi kinda makes me go insane sometimes—his entire characterization in VL in particular. It was really refreshing to see and how they included both of his characters in it, his facade and how irritated he is of a lot of things underneath. And how flexible his character is immediately working with other characters when there’s sudden improv to balance the situation. Like him and Dojima, Morooka, the attendant, or even Yuuya (hero) himself.

I’ll take Taniguchi-san’s messing around in the VL bonus backstage disc in place of Masami-san being so busy he couldn’t appear in it as often as other characters.

For stagetime that lasted for fifteen minutes or less, my appreciation for VL Adachi, even if he was just comic relief, really rocketed. I say VL, bc Adachi the edgelord he’s supposed to be in literally every other media is something I analyze separately.

I haven’t even gotten to VLE oh my GODDDDD

Like I said, I don’t really regard VLE close to canon but as something to be appreciated for what it is by itself. But the way Adachi was characterized there, in or out of character, still struck me.

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Yes, there was his strange fan-agreed-canon which is,,, now canon obsession with cabbages (not that that’s a bad thing lmao). There was also him being a lot more jumpy and intimate in a clowny way, patting people on the shoulder or even downright hugging them just to mess around. Even FORGETTING who the same goddam loser who grabbed his ass almost a year ago is. But like, can’t blame him they literally changed their actor (and screenplay writer) AHAHAHA

ha... no more comedy, only dorky sword fights now

(speaking of sword fights I think it’s a fun thought how Mamiya-san [Izanami, also one of the youngest in the cast] admitted it was his first time doing sword fight choreography and even thanked Masami-san and other staff members for guiding him)

One thing unintentionally in character was Adachi accidentally nabbing the sushi overdosed in wasabi. Masami-san didn’t actually account for a joke sushi and didn’t immediately eat it—until Taniguchi-san (who also made Dojima go off his shits compared to VL) jokingly yelled at him and even riled up the audience for him to eat it. He even went off stage to get water just for him to eat the goddam sushi.

And Masami-san did! (kinda choked, but he’s fine).

Continuing from the same scene, while being overly giddy about sushi dinner (and I mean overly--he was singing about it while hopping to the Dojima residence), he tried to remind the two, Dojima and Hayato (hero), that Nanako was sleeping. Probably where she was sick if the scene was translated from the game.

youtube

(30:07)

And... the dramatic parts of VLE

Adachi was the one who reported to the IT that Dojima was chasing Namatame in the rain. While Naoto was discussing Namatame’s journal entries, Adachi, as giddy as he is, took it from Naoto’s hands and reveled in the discovery of evidence so childishly(?). He even ran to Dojima when he began regaining consciousness and immediately called the nurses to help him wheel Dojima to the ER.

Then, The Hospital Scene™️, right after Nanako flatlines.

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(1:02:02)

Adachi, who recently walked into the scene, immediately worries about Dojima and IT who were ALL crying. He looks down, devastated—before yelling how Dojima’s heading to Namatame’s room.

He yells in terror and the same grief at his injured boss, all while running past and even jumping over children, who fell to the ground sobbing, to get to him. He continues yelling in a pained fashion while immediately reprimanding Dojima to stop. He gets carried by the collar before being tossed to the ground at Hayato’s feet, all while being pat by the same boy.

Dojima makes his speech about how unfair it is for the ‘killer’ to be alive when his daughter isn’t. When he finally falls to his knees, Adachi rises from the ground, humbly saying he’ll do his best to take care of Dojima (or something like that I’m in tears I literally can’t do VLE’s hospital scene i h8 this). He finally starts crying along with everyone else, being pushed away again but still tries again, trying to usher his boss away from the door.

With the help of the guard in front of the door, they all disappear off stage

please... I know this scene doesn’t need that much translation because of how important this scene is in the entire story. and I know my narratives aren’t enough so just,,,, just watch it please it’s so much more than this. everyone’s acting was just spectacular

youtube

(1:08:47)

So, after the IT (YOSUKE. JUST YOSUKE. good job Mae-chan) stop themselves from k wording Namatame, it was ADACHI who reported Nanako’s miracle recovery. He ran to the same corridor where they all cried in, even panting and falling to the ground in relief trying to report the good news. Then he pats Hayato on the shoulder and says he’s going to Dojima.

With this... /slaps roof of half of VLE/ ALL of this....adachi.... adachisan.... he Cares™️..... holy shit.....

now. comparing to the game. do you even remember what og Adachi did? did he.. even do anything?????

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(56:39)

NO!!! he just stood there!!!! being a bumbling fool but.... inappropriately!!! man. he didn’t act concerned enough.

adachi: /walks into a bunch of kids crying outside a hospital room/ “lmao why tf are y’all crying? did uhhh what’s her face uhhh nanako. did she d word or something? rip, I guess lol” LIKE????? CAN YOU IMPLY FASTER

and then he’s like “wgat hmm Where’s Dojima-san Heading Because That’s Not The Way To His Room 🤔” and only when he’s asked he actually mentions he’s heading to Namatame’s room and still needs to get choked by a first year for the room number like..... zero consideration

and his boss??? where his daughter he loves so much just??? di*s???? and he’s so devastated he’s doing what he can that very moment while he’s so numbed of thinking of the consequences???? And adachi goes “uhh boss that’s illegal” LIKE. BITCH. /punches through a concrete wall but harder/

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And??? His confrontation scene??? Like, I know they mashed it up w his tv confession scene to save stagetime for other scenes BUT IT WAS SO MMBMBMBMMGN /gestures in a good way/

youtube

(1:15:56)

UM?? guy behind everything??? in a vulnerable area where he could easily get physically assaulted bc hes not in the tv world w his persona?? Trash talks women like he absolute misogynist he is??? getting yelled at by a bunch of kids and YELLING BACK IN THE SAME AGITATED MANNER even TAUNTING THEM then and there to GET HIS ASS?????

og Adachi was such a pussy he got caught and just scurried off into the TV world where he ended up having powers like...ok....scared of getting beat down by a bunch of highschoolers unless you have powers...ok....

he only taunted them to get him when he was in the tv world too.....he rlly couldn’t say shit in the real world huh... lol

(yeah yeah this shows how VLE Adachi knew abt his TV world powers which would make you think if he ever went into the tv world and came back out alive. Or he’s really just a badass who doesnt give a shit abt anyone’s opinions and CAN beat anyone’s ass. i have a separate thing abt this but bc i like to laught at vle rather than overthink its own lore i might. not. idk lol)

and ??? VLE Adachi can??? He can swordfight??? he doesn’t even NEED a gun—he even reflects bullets w his blade (but apparently he can still get slapped by a flying fan more often than any other attack). His fight choreo was just...so poggers. He’s like short villains done good—like??? he’s short compared to everyone else!!! but he makes up for it for stuffing all the energy inside him while is bursts out making him him the over energetic gremlin he is!!! go VL adachi!!!!

(am I low key making fun of Madono-san in the TUUSH stageplay I’ve seen four minutes of? maybe)

OK!!! Yes I was gushing abt Masami-san again back to Adachi.

It’s portrayed that while not being afraid to admit his crimes, he also goes out of his way to be a bastard and have the gall to get a bunch of kids to fight him, one on eight. He can use a katana, probably a narrative dark reflection of the hero, Hayato which I thought was nice—and he can fight!!! It also shows his persona, yes, but...it doesn’t make it clear if he’s overwhelmed by his Shadow like in the game, where his eyes were yellow and he was emitting a dark aura.

But it gets interesting how he sees he’s getting overwhelmed and starting to lose his edge towards a bunch of kids. He falls to the ground even banging the floor like a whiny brat while literally the IT tries to tell him to turn himself in. Again, like a brat he tells everyone to shut up—before getting incapacitated. While some of the IT rejoice, he bolts up unaccepting of his defeat—before getting hit in the stomach.

youtube

(1:23:54)

And his words from when he drops his katana, “Why..?” He grabs the foldable chair against his stomach, and with a remorseful look in his eyes, he says “I’m sorry..!”

THEN HE BACKFLIPS—then Hayato slashes him.

In a tone of disbelief, he goes “no way...” and collapses to the ground, being possessed by Ame-no-Sagiri.

Blah blah blah then Teddie rockets himself into the eyeball spy cam and then they both explode aaaaa

Teddie survives but I really don’t know where Adachi went. Not even a mention by Dojima if he turned himself in or was ever found—or I need to review VLE for the 48274827482nd time hehe

WHOO then the whole cast appears for the dance number at the end of show YAHOO

#long post #persona 4 #persona 4 visualive #persona 4 visualive the evolution #tohru adachi #sulululat #pagsususuri #p4 #p4v #p4ve #//HAPPY 4K WORDS VL ANON #// if theres anything u want to ask... im right here /collapses/#// i almost went ham over actor relationships like. talking abt bpm was ENOUGHHH we're talking about the character not the assistant direct #// aaa this took so long... i literally mashed up so many other idea documents into one.. man.

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axemetaphor · 3 years

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im definitely not ripping off my friend by making a list of au ideas i have no siree //gonna slap this under a readmore cause i. well i say a lot. all of the time. i tried so hard to format this Good but tumblr fucked me up i am so sorry

so first-off i know i already have one WIP AU (Auckland) on ao3 so i wont talk about That one cause like. spoilers. i actualyl have it like 80% created so its likely gonna truly get finished for once and i dont wanna ruin shit

the other one ive posted about is something me and ben (catgirlrepublic) have worked on together its not at all close to done or anything but it's. a fun little crossover. Between jdate and my fuckinuhm. Original characters story “Untitled Villains Project”. the sketches of the comic version ive started is actually my pinned post 👉👈 its like the first chunk of the story, i think half of part 1? yea.

Tldr john fucking Somehow is able t oget into contact with a certain curious scientist from another reality who’d just love to study the Soy Sauce, most certainly not for her own nefarious purposes

John and Dave meet up with the scientist, her name is Boss, and her lab assistant, Toxic, and after a bit of a preliminary Vibe Check where john determines her trustworthy (which Dave doesnt agree with,) the two agree to be taken to the world UVP is set in. from there they stay in Boss’s lab (big old fucking abandoned military lab). John and Toxic are fast friends due to mutual love-of-chaos. John n Dave get to fuckin, camp out on an air mattress.

The day after they arrive, the two get split up, not exactly intentionally; big plot points of UVP are liek. Fueled by Boss sending Toxic to go fetch her “research materials,” which are usually important artifacts

Fuckin side note i guess i have to explain my dumb bullshit: Boss’s, uh, field of expertise so to speak is actually fckin, basically the scientific study of magic and superpowers n shit like that. This shit’s all real in that world. Toxic’s got fuckin superpowers, so do 4 other main characters, whatever. It’s got a bit to do with spirituality, iss Boss’s hypothesis. So she has Toxic fetch important artifacts that might have “energies” to them. The thing is actually way more fuckin complictated than that, this is just Boss’s initial hypothesis.

Motherfucking anyways. So Boss gives Toxic a job to do, and John get excited about how Cool that sounds, and ends up going with Toxic, leaving Boss and Dave alone. Neither is thrilled about this. But Dave and Boss get to have a bit of conversation (while Toxic and John are off bonding and having a good time) and come to a… mutual grudging understanding of some kind. They still dont like each other though lmao

Theres gonna be deeper shit going on but we havent sorted it out yet/tbh havent like Written For It in a while but i still like thinking about it a lot lol

Also pretty sure our endgame is john and dave steal toxic and bring them back with em lmao boss is kind of not nice and toxic would most certainly be better off in Undisclosed. Actually theyd fucking love it. Theyd become a local cryptid im sure. Undisclosed’s mothman is a teleporting spike baby.

I have. Another crossover AU that i might. Post something about for halloween? Maybe? If i have it finished?

Crosses over into, you guessed it, another one of my original-character projects. God, am i vain or something?

I promise this is just because i think blue and dave should get to team up to beat up some monsters

Quick briefing on my fuckinuh. Original character story, this one doesnt have a name (yet? Idk lol my work never actually goes anywhere sso who gives a shit). It centers around two grim reapers, Red (26, bi woman) and Blue (22, aroace agender asshole). In this reality or whatever, grim reapers function kind of like low-level office workers. They get told who’s going to die + when by some middle-management types, and upper management only involve themselves when punishment needs to be doled out. These Higher-Ups can be seen as analogous to Korrok; they’re decidedly not human, never were, and fucking terrifyingly powerful. Additionally, grim reapers are sort of .. designed to be “background noise” people. In reality theyre supernatural beings and, uh, look Real Fuckin Weird (the whole deal has a neon aesthetic im terrible at drawing uwu) but most humans just perceive them like extras in a movie. A body’s there but the camera’s not focused on it.

To the narrative: the shit starts when Red n Blue get relocated to Undisclosed. Relocation is something that just happens every now and then to reapers; they usually work in teams, but they get split up into different cities to avoid any strong bonds forming (a counter-union strategy from the Higher-Ups).

Red, Blue, John and Dave end up running into each other for the first time in a McDonalds where John n Dave are getting some 4am “hey, we just survived another horrific monster fight” celebration burgers. John and Dave are the only two people who can see how… strange Red and Blue are. Nobody else notices.

John unintentionally pisses Blue off, leading to Blue whacking him upside the head with a dildo bat. They all four get kicked out of McDonald’s. Dave and Red both are less than thrilled

Blue and John end up resolving their differences, somehow. Red and Dave briefly bond over their dumbass best friends being, well, dumbasses. They all part ways amicably.

somehow-or-other (idk yet) they end up running into each other a few more times, and eventually john invites them over to his place, and the four (plus Amy now!) get to know each other a little better

while there, Blue gets a text about some guy who's gonna die and John offers to drive them to where that's gonna go down. they take him up on the offer and get to have a bit of one-on-one conversation

after that ordeal though Blue has had Enough of people and bails, leaving John to head home alone

theres a sort of mirror-development going on with the five of em. Red, John, and Amy would all like everyone to get along, though theyre a bit tentative about it (John moreso than the other two, actually, jsut cause. well Red n Blue could still be Sauce Monsters). Dave and Blue on the other hand do Not like people enough for this shit, and Dave's not unconvinced theyre Sauce Monsters. he will not trust them until proven he should

the story's kinda nebulous but i got an idea for some Shit going down that involves both Sauce Monsters and also the Higher-Ups to have some fuckin absolute chaos go down.

Oops! All Trans

Everybody is transgender. Everyone

Ive actually workshopped this one both with ben (catgirlrepublic) and ghost (ghost-wannabe) lmao its a fun lil concept ive had from the get-go cause i mean. What’s an internet tran gonna do other than hit all their favourite media with the Everyone’s Trans beam

Dave transitioned post-high school and faked his death for it. People go missing in Undisclosed all the damned time, after all. He moved to the next city over, transitioned fully, then came back as a completely new man. Yes i know this doesnt exactly fit with the “everyone knows David from high school” thing alright, hush.

Anytime anyone brings up John’s old best friend (pre-transition Dave) John throws an entire fit like an overdramatic grieving widow. Full-on sobbing “why would you bring her up?! I miss her so much—” to the point that people just stop bringing up because Jesus Christ That Sure Is Uncomfortable KJHGFDS.

This is a scheme he and Dave came up with prior to Dave leaving, though Dave hadnt exactly anticipated John putting on this much of a performance about it— but it’s stopped Dave from ever having tto hear his deadname again, so hey.

Amy transitioned sometime in middle school/early high school. Her family was super supportive and loved her a ton and most people just know her as Amy. she was super shy her whole life really so. Yeah. people just dont think to bring it up lmao also i Feel Like big jim would absolutely wallop anyone who gave her trouble of any kind

John’s nonbinary (genderfluid specifically) and not exactly Interested in transitioning ? like hes fine with how he is. mostly.

he came out to Dave in high school but hes not out to anyone else exactly. Maybe his bandmates. Probably any other trans person in Undisclosed knows, too, cause theyre safe to tell lmao. Johns mostly a “he/him out of convenience” kinda nb who’s cool with any pronouns but does prefer they/them most. Dave and Amy use they/them when the trio are alone

Also this is a totally self-indulgent caveat that i think would be great, Dave’s actually agender but because he's transmasc and transitioned when he thought there were really only two options, and being Boy at least felt less weird than being Girl, he just kind of assumed he was a dude. It’s only through a lot of (like fucking years and years hes probably in his 30s/40s when he puts 2 and 2 together on this one) talks about gender with John that he realizes he actually feels like No Gender. Masc aesthetic with none gender.

I Just Think It’d Be Neat Is All Okay

Also Amy came out to Dave about being trans early on in them seeing each other and his response was to get very nervous before blurting out “me too” and then just being too embarrassed to talk about it for the rest of the day. Hes got a lot of hangups on talking about it actually it takes years for him to get comfortable in that

by contrast when Amy comes out to John about it his response is to yell “EYYY ME TOO” and give her a big ol hug lmao

I think itd be neatt if Amy ran a like. Transfem help/advice blog on tumblr. Kind of helped-with by John who can give her transfem nb insight for certain asks. I also just think that would be neat.

Cowboy AU - i put this one last cause its got drawings to it actually. Theyll be at the bottom

Basically just. Hey you ever watched a western. I think they look neat

This is another one me n ben have come up with lol

The soy sauce and all that shit still exist, im not sure where korrok fits in yet but ill figure it out

Theres no real like solid narrative yet ? but heres the barebones of everybody’s arcs.

John

Johns an absolute troublemaker, Of Course. Hes wanted in several towns for absolutely stupid shit. Hes a loner who shows up, causes chaos, gets drunk, does some drugs, runs away if people get too mad at him

He definitely had the same kind of deal with the soy sauce as in canon— he was at some kind of party, somebody offered it, he took it cause why the fuck wouldnt he, now he can see monsters and shit

Hes kind of a mooch also. Like. dont let him stay in your barn man he’ll never fucking leave and drink all your booze.

He runs into Dave when they happen to just, cross paths in the same town. the bullshit John stirs up ends up involving Dave in a way that makes it seem like it's his fault too, and they both get run out of town

after that he just tags along after Dave. hes decided this guy's Cool he wants to stick around. Dave is pissed at first, but not enough to shoot him or anything, and eventually, John grows on him

Dave

Dave also is a loner but unlike John hes simply so fucking awkward and bad with people. He doesnt feel like he belongs anywhere so he just travels

He’s the stereotypical Lone Ranger tbh. He wanders from town to town, solving their problems, though hed deny its out of any moral obligation (it kinda is, a little bit, tbh. He does like feeling useful). He shows up, fixes things, leaves. He's kind of a legend but most people think he's hiding something dark. other people jsut know him as that guy who farted real loud in the middle of the saloon and promptly skipped town out of sheer embarrassment. you know how it goes with Dave

He ends up involved with the Soy Sauce when a snake (not Actually a snake,) bites him. The snake’s more like the wig-monsters, really. Anyway, it injects him with the soy sauce, he fucking trips balls in the middle of the desert, he can see monsters now

He runs into John and shit goes tits-up, as said, but they become traveling buddies after that. he'd never say so, but he's glad for the company, actually. it's nice. hes not used to companionship but he feels a strange kind of easiness hanging out with John....

not sure how the Monster Dave concept will like fit in to this reality but like. trust me i want it in here. I'll Figure It Out.

Amy

Amy’s been living in a town John and Dave end up passing through and she is very curious about these two new Handsome Strangers who claim to fight monsters and just kinda. Persistently tags along til they let her join for real

Her family’s all dead, unfortunately, just like in canon, and she’s been living alone for a few years before meeting John n Dave. she had nothing left in that town to stay for, she'd been fantasizing about escaping on wild adventures for a long time and this felt a little like a dream come true. (Dave still gives her a spiel about how Difficult it is, but really, her fantasies were pretty grounded-in-reality already. i jsut think thats how she is, yknow?)

Shes the first person to react to the whole “we see monsters” shit with a kind of “oh, okay. neat” kind of response lmao

John and Dave fix whatever the fuck is up with her town (maybe that’s where the Korrok shit can fit, who knows) and Amy ends up being integral to that. After, she insists they take her with them because “they need her now” and Dave just cant really say no. John too is very much "the more the merrier!" and hes actually glad to have another person along he loves people lmao

At the start she has long hair but after she joins them she chops it short with a knife for convenience

also she still is an amputee. justt. idk. it was a wagon/stagecoach accident rather than a car accident lmao. just to clarify since i hadnt mentioned it, i wouldnt rob her of her ghost hand or yknow. all of the significance to her character that Missing A Hand has. although also now im going to have to research what was used as painkillers way-back-when, but im betting shes still got, like, her pain pills, they probably had those, maybe i wouldnt have to try too hard there. old timey medicine could be WACK though,

Shitload

Yeah hes in tthis shit mostly cause i liked designing his cowboy self lmao

Hes a kid (like 16, 17, technically i think in those days that was more Young Man than Kid but whatever. Hes Young i mean.) who got possessed by the Worms out in the desert and, by his family’s perception, just went missing!

Hes also a wanderer, but he ended up at the same town john and dave met in, at that same time, and starts following them after, already aware of who/what they are.

He keeps his face covered 24/7. actually he covers a Majority of his self for reasons. kinda want him to be a slightly more horrifying Worm Entity rather than human idk,

I kinda dont have much for this boy yet sorry Shitload

images !

with some editing notes for me cause im doing a very specific aesthetic with this lmao. i might change some lil details/colours though ...... idk

im also kinda 🤔 about shitload's colour palette. i want things assoicated w the sauce to be black'n'red predominantly but i think his palette might mirror dave's too closely. also im working on a korrok design i jsut am too busy to draw it now

#jdate #john dies at the end #aus #erh. tthe hell do i tag this as #rambles.txt #long post #well let me know if youd wanna hear more or. or something #send an ask. or whatever #yaknow #:jazz hands:

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ryqoshay · 3 years

Text

OTP Ask Meme (Impatient Edition) NicoMaki

Yeah, I know the point of these things is to wait for followers to Ask questions from the list, but reading though this one got me thinking too much. And, as the title implies, I got impatient and wanted to answer them all. Right away.

Anyway, credit to @lonelypond for this version coming across my dash. Reblog that version if you want to do this thing correctly.

Also, just because I’ve already answered these here, I’ve expanded on some for various reasons and left others short if I believe the reasons are obvious. So if you still want to do the whole interactive thing, you can still ask for clarification or whatever.

And finally, there will be spoilers ahead for How to Handle a Nico, both scenes I’ve written and posted, as well as some that remain in my Notes and WIP Warehouse. I’ll try to remember to link to the chapters mentioned.

1. Who wakes up first?

Nico, so she can make breakfast for her Maki.

2. Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Maki. Usually because she studies or works later and/or longer hours. She is also not above pulling Nico back into bed when she comes to wake her.

3. Who takes longer getting ready?

Usually Nico.

4. When they can’t sleep, what do they do?

Maki’s libido can pretty much always be counted on to at least exhaust Nico, if not both of them.

5. Who falls asleep while watching a movie?

Depends on who had a rough day or week at work/school, though Maki may get bored and either watch Nico or fall asleep during overly sappy romance movies.

6. Who falls asleep last, watching the other with a small affectionate smile?

Either, depending on the stresses of the prior day.

7. Who comes up with the cheesy pick-up lines?

Nico intentionally. Maki unintentionally.

8. Who gets extremely competitive playing Mario Kart?

They both are, though in different ways. This is depicted in Consolation Prize.

9. Who accidentally pushes a door instead of pulling?

Maki, especially if she is in an unfamiliar place.

10. Who sets the other’s ringtone to something loud and obnoxious behind their back?

Both, though Maki only in retaliation for whatever teasing Nico may have done.

11. Who rearranges the bookshelf/DVD shelf in alphabetical order?

Nico likes a proper presentation of her idol merch. Maki is too busy with other stuff to care about special organization.

12. Who does the hands-over-the-eyes “Guess Who” thing?

Nico.

13. Who points out a dog when they see one?

Either.

14. Who’s prone to road rage?

Maki, especially when she is trying to get to the hospital when called in at some odd hour, or trying to get home after a stressful day.

15. Who’s prone to wearing socks indoor (or to sleep)?

Nico gets cold easier. Warm socks help.

16. Who reminds the other to put on sunscreen before going to the beach (or pool)?

Nico, partly out of habit from doing it with her siblings and partly as an excuse to offer to help Maki put it on. Depicted in Sunscreen.

17. Who carries all the important documents while traveling?

Nico.

18. Who gets the window seat?

Nico. Maki traveled enough with her parents and is happy to let her girlfriend see the sights instead.

19. Who puts their cold hands/feet on the other?

Nico intentionally. Maki unintentionally, usually.

20. What do they argue about the most?

I don’t believe anyone has been brave enough to track the data for this.

21. Who’s clumsier?

Maki, especially in the kitchen. Nico has her moments though.

22. Who texts more often?

Nico. With heavy emoji use. (I need to depict this more in HtHaN somehow)

23. Who is better with kids?

Nico. She was the primary caregiver for her siblings for many years after all.

24. Who’s the better cook?

Nico. See above.

25. Who mistakes salt for sugar?

Maki. Even after Nico labeled the containers.

26. Who puts the fork in the microwave?

Maki.

27. Who cooks at 2 in the morning?

Nico. Maki isn’t allowed to cook without Nico’s supervision. However, this would be a rare occasion as Nico typically will prepare something ahead of when Maki is arriving home this late and leave it for her to reheat.

28. Who lets the microwave play the loud beeping sound at 1 a.m.?

Maki, when she’s reheating whatever Nico made for her after arriving home late.

29. Who licks the spoon when they’re baking brownies?

Both.

30. Who likes doing the dishes?

Nico, though it would be more appropriate to say she doesn’t dislike it.

31. Who has bigger cravings? What are they?

Nico loves her sweets. Maki loves her Nico.

32. Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

Nico is highly attentive to Maki’s preferences in food. Knowing what Maki likes in restaurants lets her know what she can make at home. And food is definitely one of the best ways to Maki’s heart.

33. How do they eat ice cream? What’s their favorite flavors?

Nico likes sundaes with lots of sugary toppings. She also likes trying new flavors and will often get multiple scoops of different flavors. Maki is fine with a single scoop cone.

34. Do they go on dates? What are they like?

As often as their schedules allow. Maki likes quite dates like walks in a park or museum or sitting up on a hillside for stargazing. Nico likes shopping for outfits and idol merch, going to movies and bustling amusement parks. But both love watching the other enjoy their hobbies so they’re willing to go along with the other’s interests as well.

35. What do they smell when they smell Amortentia?

Nico smells her father’s aftershave, strawberries, and stewing tomatoes. Maki smells Nico’s special tomato curry, Nico’s shampoo, and the cinnamon sugar of the snickerdoodle cookies the Nishikino baker made for her to leave out for Santa.

Yes, two of Maki’s are directly related to Nico. What can I say? She’s addicted.

36. Which one is the secret snuggler?

Maki. The more tired or drunk she is, the clingier she gets.

37. Which one offers their jacket to the other when they complain they feel cold?

Maki. Nico gets cold easier, so Maki is usually the one to offer her jacket.

38. Who reaches for the other one’s hand while driving?

Yes.

39. Who leaves little notes in the other one’s lunch?

Nico, because she is the only one who makes lunch for them both; Maki isn’t the type to do such a thing even if she were allowed to cook more. (Bonus: What does it say?) Usually the messages are simple affirmations of love, but she is not above getting snarky if the two had an argument recently.

40. Who is the most affectionate?

Nico in public. Maki in private.

41. Who is the big spoon/little spoon?

Usually, Maki is the big spoon as she is quite fond of hugging her Nico like a teddy bear, though Nico will sometimes jetpack.

42. What is their favorite feature of their partner?

Maki loves Nico’s smile, particularly her genuine, unforced, non-idol persona smile. Nico loves Maki’s voice, specifically her singing voice.

43. What is the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Nico starts teasing Maki more, no longer to “put the spoiled rich girl in her place” but rather to see more of the adorable reactions. Maki actively tries to deny her feelings, even to, or perhaps especially to herself, falling back on established habits of insisting that she doesn’t have time to date, all the while quietly continuing to seek more time with Nico.

44. What are their nicknames for each other?

Both exclusively use -chan with the other.

45. Who worries the most? Over what?

Early on, both are worried about losing the other for different reasons. Nico is afraid that should a scandal occur that ruins her idol career, Maki may blame herself and leave. Maki fears that a busy schedule of studying in medical school followed by long hours at the hospital may turn away someone like Nico, whose attention seeking seems infinite. Later, as they settle into their relationship, their concerns turn to more stereotypical adult fears; traffic or transit accidents, sever illnesses, etc.

46. Who initiates kisses?

Nico in public. Maki in private.

47. Who says I love you first? How did it happen?

Nico, by accident, as depicted in Spoken.

48. Who tells their friends/family about their relationship first?

Technically Maki in both cases, though with their friends, Nico was active in the chatroom, and with their mothers, Maki only beat Nico by maybe half an hour or so. These instances are depicted in Reconstructed Reunion and Telling Mama.

49. What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Both have busy schedules, even as early as the years immediately following high school, so spending time away from each other is quite commonplace. This still did not stop Maki from going through a bout of depression during Nico’s first tour as a professional idol, as depicted in Homesick and Homecoming. From then on, Maki starts a tradition of visiting Nico during longer tours so as to break up their time away a bit.

50. Who gets overwhelmed by small acts of kindness?

Nico, as the more romantic of the two. This isn’t to say Maki doesn’t value sentiment, she just has other ways of expressing it than being overwhelmed.

#NicoMaki #How to Handle a Nico

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thewayshedreamed · 4 years

Text

This Time— Part 6

A Nessian Fan Fic

Fic Masterlist

This chapter offers some additional insight into Nesta’s thought process and sheds a little light on the ongoing process her emotional development has become. I hope it comes through!

This is somewhat of a “building” chapter so that we can get Nessian to the crest, so to speak. Part 7 is already written and only needs some editing, so it’s possible that I’ll be doing a double update today ☺️ They certainly have a lot to discuss, and once I started writing, I couldn’t stop. 😂 Anyway, enough of me. Enjoy!

Links to the previous parts:

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 ||

Warnings for grief related to the loss of a parent and some strong language.

——————————————————————————

Around 11:00 PM, Nesta decided she couldn’t be alone with her thoughts anymore. She was ruminating on similar memories and effectively raking herself over the coals. Although she knew any one of her friends would be there for her no matter the time of day, she picked up her phone to call the one she knew would most likely be awake at this hour.

“Hello?” Azriel’s raspy voice came through the phone.

“Were you asleep?! Since when do you go to bed early?” Her surprise was obvious by her tone. What the hell? He’s never in bed before midnight.

“Nes. Always a pleasure.” Azriel breathed a chuckle into the phone. “I usually wouldn’t be. I’m.. umm.. at a friend’s house tonight.”

Nesta gasped and dropped her voice. “Oh my gods. Az, were you on a date?! Am I interrupting?” She clapped her free hand over her forehead. “I’m the worst. I’m sorry.”

Another chuckle from Azriel. “You don’t have to whisper, you know. She can’t hear you. You’re not interrupting anything. I was asleep when you called, but I’m out on the couch now. What’s up?”

”If you were asleep, then that counts as interrupting! Are you sure?”

”Yes. Just, maybe the short version?” His tone was tentative, almost as if he felt guilty asking her to keep it concise at 11 PM. No one truly deserved Azriel as their friend.

“I can do that. So, here it is. I’ll save you the long, tedious trip through my brain.” She paused for half a second to take a breath. “I’m in love with Cassian.” She let out a quiet groan for effect.

”Mhmm...” The lilting of his voice implied that he was waiting for something like the punchline of a joke; the unknown part of her statement.

Her breath caught. “I kind of expected more of a reaction.”

”Did you? I thought there was more to it.” He seemed entirely neutral in that grating way of his.

”How did you know?!” She asked, incredulously.

”You told me.”

“Mm.. I don’t think so. When?” Now she was actually confused. Did she make some kind of drunken confession at Rita’s? She would remember having this revelation before now.

“At brunch. When we were driving home.”

”What are you talking about?!” Her voice was definitely higher pitched than it had been previously. She was anxious to hear his response, thinking he had surely dreamed this.

”Nesta. We were in my car, backing out of the parking lot. You asked me, ‘Why couldn’t we be the ones to fall in love?’ Or something along those lines. I thought that you were using some cryptic way of telling me because it implied two parties. Why do you think I hit the brakes so hard?” He seemed impatient, as if he was telling her the most obvious thing in the world.

“I thought maybe the question weirded you out! I didn’t even realize what I said, to be honest. How the actual fuck do you notice tiny things like that?” She didn’t wait on his response. He would know it was rhetorical. “Now my problem is this: I think he’s dating someone, so I’ve lost my chance.” She briefly told him what she had overheard the night of Elain’s birthday, her voice starting to crack toward the end.

”Hm. He hasn’t said anything to me about that, but I could see why he would wait being that you and I are close. But honestly, I don’t know that you could ever lose your chance with Cassian, Nes.”

She didn’t have anything to say to that. She simply sat there, playing with the corner of her throw blanket and hoping he would continue. He seemed to sense her discomfort and started talking again.

“I think you’ll regret it if you don’t talk to him. But, if I can offer my opinion, maybe wait a little while so that you know you’re absolutely sure this is what you want. I don’t know how he would handle it if you decided it’s not what you want.”

She felt herself prickle with defensiveness. “I wouldn’t do that to him, Az. Of course I’m sure. It only took me an eternity to figure this shit out.”

Azriel responded in a soothing tone he so often used with her. “I know. But remember, you’re not the one he talks to about you. I’m just looking out for my brother. Maybe let it marinate, yeah?”

She knew his intentions were pure, and she couldn’t really blame him for being protective. Before she could respond, she heard a feminine voice in the background ask: “Az, everything okay?”

She heard him pull the phone away from his face to answer. “Oh, yeah. All good. It’s Nesta.”

Delayed by her scattered brain and the copious amount of wine, the identity of the voice finally hit her full force.

”IS THAT ELAIN?!” She sat up straighter as if it would allow her to hear them more readily.

She heard Azriel laugh, followed by a shuffling on the other end.

“Hello? Nesta? Everything okay?” Nesta could hear the genuine concern in her voice.

“Hey, El. Everything’s fine! Sorry to crash your date. It seems we have quite a bit to talk about. Very soon.”

It took Elain a couple of seconds to respond, and Nesta could hear the smile in her voice. “Yeah. I think we do. Someone told me I should just talk to him. Turns out that they were right.” She paused, waiting for an “I told you so” from Nesta. She didn’t have the energy. “You know you can talk to me about Cassian, too, right?”

Nesta shut her eyes tightly and shook her head. “Of course. I’m sorry. I’ve been leaning on Az since our fight, and I honestly haven’t had the energy to bring it up beyond that. But I do want to talk to you. And Feyre. It’s just been...hard.”

“I can imagine. It’s hard to remember a time before you and Cass. It’s like the end of an era or something. Just know that we’re here.” Her voice was soft, laced with worry and a desire to help her older sister.

”Maybe for now,” Nesta teased, “but you may not have much time to chat these days.”

She knew she was blatantly deflecting, but El’s words had caused tears to prick her eyes yet again. It’s hard to remember a time before you and Cass. She realized how true it was, and what upset her the most was that she knew she didn’t want to know a time without Cassian.

The call wrapped up with more gentle teasing between the sisters, and eventually, embarrassing Azriel a bit over speakerphone. She told them she loved them and promised to keep them updated on how she was feeling. Her heart felt lighter once she finally ended the call, thanks to the laughter they managed to pull from her.

——————————————————————————

Christine Archeron’s death anniversary fell on a Tuesday that year, and Nesta awoke with a similar irritation as last year— death anniversaries should never fall on weekdays. She went through the familiar motions as any other morning, headed to work, and concentrated on her various tasks she was expected to juggle at any given time. As appearances went, it looked like any other ordinary day to those around her, so the extra heaviness remained hers alone to carry.

On her lunch break, she got a chance to pull her phone to check her messages and mindlessly scroll through social media. She had been focused on scrolling for so long that her phone took her by surprise when it vibrated in her hand. She tapped the notification by reflex and found herself studying the sender’s name as if it was some sort of mistake.

Cassian: Thinking about you today. I know it’s a rough one. Keep your head up. Christine would have it no other way ❤️

Nesta read the text several times in a row; just to make sure it was real. It had been so long since he’d contacted her intentionally, and it made her happy that he still thought to reach out today. It simultaneously made her a little sad; however, because it was yet another reminder of what she’d lost in him. That was an issue to deal with later.

Nesta: Of course you are, because you’re the perfect human, and I don’t deserve you. Thanks, Cass 💕 Means the world to me to hear from you. Mom really loved you, and I know she would appreciate you looking out for us.

She hesitated over the send button for several seconds before deciding to go through with it. It felt so weird to intentionally script any type of message to him being that they had spent most of their relationship entirely uncensored. Everything about it felt wrong— she couldn’t act natural with him because it wasn’t appropriate anymore, yet she didn’t feel right having to draft and redraft their communication. It was all so fucked, and she was tired of this odd limbo they stayed in.

She reflected on her conversation with Azriel and Elain on the night she had unintentionally crashed their date. She knew that they both held strong points about her situation and wouldn’t advise her to try to repair things if they knew it was a lost cause. She acknowledged that Azriel, specifically, knew more than he was at liberty to tell her. That being the case, she decided that was evidence in favor of hashing things out with Cassian. It wasn’t long before she was lost in her own thoughts, her food entirely forgotten.

I’ve spent my entire life trying to ensure I didn’t need anyone. I never wanted to depend heavily on another person in a way that I couldn’t manage on my own. But that’s not really the case anyway, right? I’ve managed fine these few weeks, but that’s the thing. I’ve managed. Why do I try to insist that’s enough for me?

But what if the door is closed? What if this was Cassian’s final push, and he’s gone? I don’t know Alis, and she could be wonderful. She probably appreciates the shit out of him and saw immediately that he’s not the average person. She probably knows how special he is. She probably beams anytime he enters a room and tries to take care of his heart in any way she can. She’s probably fucking delightful.

But does that really compete with history? I guess if that history is filled with turmoil, it could. She’ll never know the Cassian that was a freshman in high school— braces and curly hair, still a head taller than most of the other boys in class. She won’t remember how he hit his second growth spurt the summer after sophomore year, where he started to fill out and caught the attention of any girl with a pulse. She doesn’t know what it’s like when he’s truly angry with his dad and the world. She doesn’t know the full range of his eclectic music tastes or the guilty pleasures he sings depending on his mood. She didn’t do the leg work to reconcile the tough, intimidating exterior when he gets upset with the gentle soul beneath. There’s no way she knows when his humor and his laughter are distractions from his pain rather than when they’re genuine. She can’t love him like I do. Im-fucking-possible.

She was pulled abruptly out of her head, and incredible jealousy, by her alarm. It was time to go back to work and finish out the day, and she hoped it passed as quickly as possible. She silently chastised herself for piling this emotional time bomb on today of all days as she threw away her lunch and walked out of the break room.

So much for leaving this issue for later.

She resolved to put all of these thoughts back into their little box until she had the emotional energy to open the lid once again. Whenever the hell that would be.

——————————————————————————

The rest of the day zoomed by at a blissful pace, thank the gods. In fact, when Nesta glanced at the clock, she realized it was several minutes after 5:00 PM. She clocked out, grabbed her things, and climbed into her car. She took a deep breath, mentally preparing herself to make the drive out to the cemetery. She wasn’t sure what time Elain had been able to go by, but Nesta had agreed to meet Feyre at 5:30 to pay their respects. It was becoming a standing tradition, where they would make their short visit whenever they could during the day and follow with dinner together as a family.

She made it with a few minutes to spare, so she took that time to sit with her mom one-on-one. She gave her a brief update on her life, told her how much she loved and missed her, and gently brushed any leaves or grass clippings off of her headstone. There were fresh flowers in her vase, something she noted each year on her death anniversary. Any other time of year, they kept seasonally appropriate faux flowers to make sure her site was properly decorated. She made a mental note to offer to contribute to the fresh arrangement in the years following when she saw her family at dinner. They were always taken care of before she made it out to the cemetery, and she didn’t want to risk forgetting for the next year. She leaned into the arrangement, taking in the various floral scents emanating from the blooms in the bouquet. There was a myriad of vivid colors, wildflowers throughout, and Nesta loved how true to her mother’s spirit they were.

She turned when she heard car doors and saw Feyre approaching with Rhysand. She stood, extending an arm out to her baby sister, who accepted it readily and rested her head on her shoulder. They wrapped their arms around each other, and Rhysand stood nearby, resting his hand on Feyre’s opposite shoulder. They stood together for several minutes until Nesta excused herself to allow Feyre some time alone with their mom as well.

She drove to her father’s house where she found Elain already setting the table for dinner. They worked together quietly, making sure they had plenty of place settings for everyone. Azriel offered his help to carry various dishes of food to the dining table and took his seat next to Elain once it was all settled. Almost as if on cue, Feyre and Rhysand walked into the house and took their seats as well. The dinner started off quiet considering the somber mood, but Feyre was the first to break the tension when she started to tell stories from their childhood. In a matter of moments, their home was filled with animated story telling and loud bouts of laughter, and Nesta couldn’t think of a better way to honor her mom’s love of life.

As everyone finished up, she suddenly remembered her mental note from earlier. She waited for a natural lull in conversation, then commented softly, “Mom’s flowers were beautiful, you guys. You did an amazing job.”

”They were really perfect. They couldn’t have been more ‘Christine’ if you tried,” Feyre remarked.

“Elain, Dad. I’m not sure which of you took care of them this year, but would you let me take care of next time? I haven’t contributed since she passed, and I’d really like to.”

Mr. Archeron softly shook his head back and forth, communicating to Nesta that it hadn’t been him. Nesta adjusted her gaze to Elain who looked just as confused.

“Oh. Nes, I assumed it was one of you. I didn’t... I didn’t order them. I wished I had.” She looked down at her hands, and Azriel placed a supportive arm across the back of her chair.

“Okay... so who did?” She glanced around the table from person to person, but no one took any credit. It was Rhys who spoke up first, clearing his throat to master his voice.

“You don’t know?”

”Obviously.” She looked to Feyre for support. What the hell is that supposed to mean? Feyre said nothing, watching Rhysand talk with rapt attention.

When he spoke again, it was cautious, as if his words may startle her. “Nesta. The flowers are from Cassian. He’s done them every year since Mrs. Christine died.”

She was suddenly short of breath. Everyone’s attention snapped to Rhys, including her father’s. Her sisters and Azriel were looking at Rhysand with stunned expressions, their eyes flicking to her face occasionally.

“What? How could you know— why would you know, when we don’t? What the fuck is going on?” She was falling over her own words, struggling to form any cohesive thought.

”I’m so sorry,” Rhysand glanced around the room for the first time, realizing he had everyone’s attention. “The only reason I knew was because he asked me to make sure they made it from the flower shop to her gravesite the year he had knee surgery. He asked me to keep it to myself then, but I figured by now he would have said something to at least one other person.” He looked down into his plate, various emotions playing over his handsome face. Feyre leaned over to comfort him, knowing he was likely embarrassed to be the reason the air had changed so dramatically.

Nesta’s head was swimming, emotions roiling from a million different directions. She knew anger was cheap and unfair, but she pulled on that tether as hard as she could to make sure she could navigate everything she was processing. She was on her feet suddenly, pushing her chair away from the table and walking toward her keys.

“I have to go.” She couldn’t be in here anymore. The room was too small, the walls were too close. Too many people. She picked up the pace, flinging the door open and shutting it hard behind her. She was down the porch steps when she heard the door open again. Azriel’s voice followed her.

”Nesta. Where are you going? Nesta, stop!” He had jogged lightly to catch up with her, and he tugged her gently by the wrist to stop her. She spun on him quickly, eyes flaring and brimming with tears.

“Anywhere but here! What the fuck was that, Az?”

He said nothing; looked down at his own feet as he shook his head.

“Cassian has some fucking nerve, you know that? Why is he insisting upon himself?” Her voice was lowered and had taken on an almost eerie quality; the calm before the proverbial storm.

“Nes, I don’t think he meant to upset you. It sounds like it’s something he’s made somewhat of a tradition. Maybe he just wanted to be sure and see it through.”

”He doesn’t get to do that anymore, Azriel. He doesn’t get to butt-dial me while he makes date plans with some girl, then turn around and send flowers to my dead mother. What am I supposed to think about that? And how would that make his girlfriend feel?” Azriel pulled her into a hug at that, resting his chin on top of her head. He didn’t answer her. There was nothing to say.

She pulled away from him, gripping her keys, and walked toward her car. “I’m out. Tell them I love them, and I’ll call tomorrow.” She nodded her chin toward the house, climbed into her car, and backed out of the driveway.

——————————————————————————

She wasn’t sure how long she’d driven before she found herself in his driveway. She knew it hadn’t been very long considering the sun was still clinging to the end of the day. She honestly didn’t remember making the conscious decision to come here, likely fueled by anger and muscle memory more than anything else. She was still so frustrated at her situation, her emotions spilling over and refusing to be put into that stupid fucking box anymore. The worst part was that, as mad as she was with him, she so badly wanted to see him. She wished the circumstances were less complicated so that she could knock, ask for a hug and some tea, and lay on his couch. They were a hell of a long way from those people now.

She loosed a breath, puffing her cheeks with air and exhaling slowly. Just before she peeled her head from the headrest to get out, his front door opened. He opened it most of the way, then leaned against the door jamb on his shoulder. He had his hands in the pockets of his sweats and one of his ankles crossed casually over the other. For a moment, she only looked at him, unable to move or offer any type of acknowledgement. She took in the charcoal henley he was wearing, unbuttoned save for the very last one. The small flap of the opening leaned to the side, revealing the base of his neck and the beginning of his tattoos. He looked so very Cassian, casual and laid-back, that she struggled to keep her emotions level at the mere sight of him. His hair was down, looking like he had just run his fingers through it with its deep part and how it fell haphazardly around his face. He was wearing his reading glasses, she noticed, the thick frames highlighting the sharp angle of his cheekbones and the wide set of his jaw. He gave her a soft smile, and cocked his head to the side and back in invitation. She could almost hear him gently telling her to “get in here”.

Too late to turn back now.

——————————————————————————

A/N: Alrighty, hope y’all enjoyed this chapter, even with minimal Nessian. The next chapter(s) will more than make up for it, though! I’m hoping to have max Nessian to y’all ASAP. A million thanks to all of you who continue to follow this au. Your comments/ feedback have meant the world to me!

If you’d like to be tagged, feel free to comment, reblog, or send a message! I’d be happy to add you to the list. If I’ve accidentally left you off or there are issues with your tag, let me know, and I’ll look into it! Comments and constructive criticism are welcome (even encouraged)!

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