#the way i have SOBBED over this song while making this edit and over these two is ridiculousbyet again

[rainbowinbeigeboots]

villaneve: i swear that i will wake up next to you

#killing eve #killing eve edit #killing eve fan edit #villaneve #villaneve edit #eve polastri #villanelle #tw flash #tw flashing #the way i have SOBBED over this song while making this edit and over these two is ridiculousbyet again #anyways hope ya’ll like this new edit xoxo #video #emiie rambles

[mysticficti0n]

goodbye... for awhile

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warnings- swearing, fluffy, emotional, 16years old

words- 1.8k

a/n-I had this idea last night while watching something on insta so here's my go at it! just pretend thats you and Tom 🫡 and for when they preform in class for the lesson I know 'all I wanted' is a song by Paramore (love them sm) but lets say for the sake of this Y/n, Bill and Tom created it okay?

(editing B here may I say I cried while writing this... and editing this so if you ever need to cry, this has you covered)

I woke up and my mood dropped immediately, it was Friday which most people would be excited obviously- the weekend was on it's way, but the thought of today created a pit in my stomach, my last day with the Kaulitz twins, they were my best friends since we began at the school, Bill and I would meet up after lessons everyday and walk home together sometimes even staying at his for dinner, then Tom began hanging with us and 5 years later we've been all best friends and me and Tom started dating we were 14 and now we're 16 and only me, him, our parents, Bill and his other bandmates know about us- but after today....what was us going to become.

I got ready wearing some jeans, a top which tucked neatly to my sides and some shoes I got for my birthday, I decided to go simple with make up, I already was crying so I didn't need mascara dripping down my cheeks. I looked to the mirror and smiled taking a breath "honey?" my moms voice appeared around the corner and then her face with a small smile "oh sweetheart" she cooed walking in a wrapping her arms around me rubbing my back "I know you're gonna miss them, but I promise you'll see them when they're back- it's okay" I sighed to her shoulder letting my tears go down my face before we pulled away

"I'm just scared to be on my own mom and I'll miss them both so much and... I don't want them to leave but I know they have to" I breathed shakily trying to stop the cries before my mom spoke the bell rang making my heart sink instantly

"we'll talk after okay, lets go to them" I nodded grabbing my bag and walking down the stairs as she opened the door "oh boys" she sighed pulling the two for a hug "I'm so proud of you both but gosh we're going to miss you sweets, but you'll be amazing" she spoke pressing a kiss to both their cheeks, letting them out her arms and I finally looked to their faces which looked sadder and I just looked down and covered my face "talk to her boys" my mom said patting their shoulders and soon I felt hands wrap around me

"I'm gonna miss you two so much" I managed to say between my sobs "but I'm so excited for you, I just don't know what I'm gonna do without you guys" we all pulled away and I saw tears slipping from the brown eyed twins "I'm sorry" a small laughed left my lips

"making us cry Y/n" Bill grinned wiping his eyes "I just... I wish we could bring you along with us" he said while looking to Tom who was looking to me, I turned to him and saw tears streaming down his skin

"oh Tom-" I stood taking him into my arms letting his face go to the crook of my neck "its okay- you're okay"

"I-i'm gonna miss you so much" he whimpered to me his hands clinging to me "I don't wanna leave you Y/n" he whispered

"I know" I breathed pressing a kiss to his cheek "I'm going to watch all your interviews though, and anything I find of your band and I'll try come to a few shows I promise" Bill came over and hugged me along with his brother and my arms curled around the two as we all really excepted it was happening

"darlings- lets get a last photo together, for memories" my mom's smooth voice broke us apart and I stood between the two still crying with a painful hiccup every few seconds but smiling non the less "okay 1...2...3" the camera flashed a few times before she started to well up "beautiful, you... you three need to go to school no...now" her voice broke "Y/n I'll see you after and... oh boys" she sighed as the two came to her arms again "love you two so much"

"love you Y/M/N" they answered coming away and taking a breath "ready?" Tom looked to me giving his hand which I took and I said goodbye to my mom and walked out the house for the last time with them.

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1-3rd period flew by and three o'clock was near approaching, our last class together was music which is were we all first met, Tom was already sat at the table when me and Bill walked in from our last lesson and we pulled out chairs out from the desk "last hour" Bill spoke looking to his brother who nodded "I think we get to finish our pieces today- I need the paper" Bill rose and went to the teachers desk leaving me and Tom

"you okay?" I spoke shuffling my chair closer to him and he just shook his head "same, b..but we need to just enjoy this okay- I love you so much" I whispered hitting his leg with my foot

"love you too" a smile appeared to his lips as he playfully kicked me back laughing as I missed my shot "idiot" he spat seeing me huff in annoyance

"got the papers!" Bill cheered coming back and placing the sheet music in front of us, our song 'all I wanted', I was singing along with Bill who was playing the piano and Tom was doing acoustic guitar for the background "okay so we need to practise the end bit and Y/n you can do the 'you' bit okay the really long one" I nodded listening to him speak over what we both had to do, through his speech I felt Toms hand search under the table for mine so quickly when I realised I grabbed his palm and held it under the table giving him the 3 squeeze 'I...Love...you'

Time flew by and it got to our time to perform, we stood in from of our class and teacher who was smiling "before we begin, this is Tom and Bills last day with us before they leave to go on tour! congratulations boys so this people is like a free concert, along with Y/n of course" hearing another person say it was their last day hit my heart in a way I didn't know it could be hit and my eyes teared up "ready?" we all nodded and started our song , throughout the song I could feel a pair of eyes on my side, Tom who sat with a proud smile as I actually hit the note with a tear falling from my eye and then hearing gasps from the class

"all I wanted was you!" we ended and the crowd before us applauded, our teacher clapping too, we all hugged before going to our seats, me and Bill highfived as we sat down and I quickly rubbed the tears from my eyes Tom through me a wink and then the bell sounded meaning time for last lesson where I'm with neither of the boys "I'll see you outside" I turned to the two who nodded and Bill was pulled into a conversation with our teacher and Tom turned to me

"we'll be picked up by this bus thing and Georg and Gustav will be in there so if you wanna say goodbye to them too you can" he smiled wrapping his one arm over my shoulders

"great more crying" I giggled leaning to his arm "I don't want you to go Tom" my voice was calm but inside I was falling apart already

"I don't wanna either... mhh- want me and Bill to walk you to your lesson for the last time? like the old times" he spoke changing the subject before we both started to cry again

"yeah...yes please"

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"have a good weekend everyone!" my teacher announced meaning it was our time to leave, I hurriedly grabbed my things and rushed out the room and sprinted down the corridor to the outside where I could see a mass of people and camera's pointed to two people and a tall man, fuck

"move! please move!" I shouted shoving the crowd as I realised it was Tom and Bill being escorted to the bus that was taking them away "BILL! WAIT BILL PLEASE WAIT" I screamed before finally getting out of the sea of bodies seeing him turn around to me and I rushed into his arms "I'm gonna miss you Bill- fuck I don't want you to leave me here, but do us all proud okay?"

I felt another pair of hands try to pry me away "excuse me ma'am" it was their bodyguard which Bill quickly brushed away before bringing me close again

"we will call- every day, I'll miss you so much- do us proud here too! you'll be amazing okay? come to our shows to see us, scream us I'll know its you okay?" I nodded as tears fell down our cheeks "bye Y/n/n" I sobbed hearing him say it

"bye Billy" I spoke before he let go and I saw Tom rush toward me and I just jumped to his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck and crying into his skin "I love you so much Tom- I love you so so much, you'll do amazing out there, and call me okay- please call me my love and...and don't forget about me " I cried to him and I felt his chest stutter

"I will baby I promise I'll call every night, I'm so sorry we need to go, I love you so much my sweet girl, I promise I will visit when I can and I'm telling you now I wont forget you- how could I?" we pulled apart but still in each others arms "I love you so fucking much baby- so much"

"I love you Tom" we forgot about the crowd and our lips pressed together, it was a kiss I never wanted to leave because I knew leaving it meant I had to let go of him, my boy- I could taste our tears mixing on our lips as we breathed unsteadily before the horn of the car honked "you'll be so good out there... I love you Tom- I love you so much"

"fuck I love you so much Y/n"

we hugged once more before he climbed into the van, I quickly waved to Georg and Gustav who sat patting Tom's back as I watched him sob into his hands, Bill held a heart up as the engine purred awake "DO YOURSELF AND US PROUD AND I PROMISE I'LL COME SEE YOU GUYS- LOVE YOU SO MUCH" I yelled as the began to drive, Tom blew me a kiss before they began to speed up down the road and then they were gone and I just the tears slide down my face until mom showed up coming out the car and wrapping me in a hug "they're gone- they're gone mom" I welped

"I know darling- I know" she held me so tight and brushed the tears from my face "you'll see them again- all of them, and they'll make us all so happy- trust me"

#tom kaulitz imagines #tom kaulitz x reader #tom kaulitz fluff #tom kaulitz #00s #georg listing #tokio hotel #gustav schäfer #germany #bill kaulitz #kaulitz twins #tom kaulitz fanfic #bill kaulitz x reader #humanoid #2000s #2000s music #romance #young love #saying goodbye

[stormberry-12]

Heyy,I love your writing! May I request a JJ fic inspired by the ‘Work Song’ by Hozier?

time comes around ~ jj maybank x reader

notes: thank you so much for the request and I'm so sorry it took soooo long. it gave me so much to work with and it ended up being super long lol, i hope it turned out okay I kinda just went with what the lyrics reminded me of.

you also don't really have to read all of them if you don't want, their all just blurbs off JJ and Y/n's life together. ❤

pairing: jj maybank x fem!reader (jj pov)

warnings: making out, jj's dad being a dick, mentions of jj's good ol' gun, language. (not very well edited)

(i recommend listening while you read>>>>)

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Boys workin' on empty Is that the kinda way to face the burning heat? I just think about my baby I'm so full of love I could barely eat

"Jayj!" she giggled, dropping her fork on the table and staring at me.

"What?!?" I laughed in mock offense, crossing my arms and leaning back in my chair.

"You haven't even touched your food," y/n complained, her pretty eyes squinting at me in confusion.

"I-"

"You love food." she interrupted me, a smile playing on her lips, "Probably more than you love anything else in the world, now eat!"

"Not as much as I love you," I whisper, she looks down at her plate with a smile and a blush. "I don't want to eat... I just want to watch you,"

"That sounds creepy when you say it like that, stop!" she choked on her food and I fell into a fit of laughter that squeezed my lungs, making it hard to breathe. She made it hard to breathe.

There's nothing sweeter than my baby I'd never want once from the cherry tree 'Cause my baby's sweet as can be She give me toothaches just from kissin' me

I hummed into her lips, they were sweet, soft, and warm. I tapped her thighs signaling for her to jump up, she wrapped her legs around my waist, hands in my hair.

Her back hit the wall and I slid my hands up her waist. She hummed into my mouth and we broke away panting.

"Missed you too-"

"Shut up." she said and I laughed, leaning my forehead against hers. I was so glad it was finally summer, her family would stay at their beach house for the next few months and we would spend every day together. Love only growing.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

Boys, when my baby found me I was three days on a drunken sin I woke with her walls around me Nothin' in her room but an empty crib

I woke up with the sun shining through the curtain, y/n was laying on top of me, her arms and body heavy like they were sheltering me from a storm. In this case, the storm was my dad.

She shifted on top of me, rubbing her eyes from sleep.

"Morning," she whispered.

"Mornin'," I said back, shifting our position and sitting up, pulling her into my lap.

"I'm so sorry," she rubbed patterns into my bicep, "I had no idea... do- do you want to talk about it?"

I looked down at her beautiful face and shrugged my shoulders. She looked up at me and I wrapped my arms around her tighter.

"He has no right to do that-" her fingertips ghosted over the scar on my cheek that she had patched up the night before. After I had come knocking away on her window way past midnight.

I felt a pain in my chest, "I'm sorry I bothered you with this, I'm so sorry-" I buried my face in her neck so she wouldn't see me cry.

"Oh Jayj..."

A sob broke my lips and my shoulders shook, god I was being such a baby.

She turned to face me, still sitting in my lap, holding the sides of my face with her hands. Her eyes were watering as she kissed each tear that fell from my face before wiping it away.

"You could never bother me," she said, voice more stern. I silently thanked her.

God, how did I get so lucky.

And I was burnin' up a fever I didn't care much how long I lived But I swear I thought I dreamed her She never asked me once about the wrong I did

"Y/n-" I said sitting on the couch, running a hand through my hair, "I can't believe I did that, I'm so sorry-"

She just watched me from the other side of the chateau, leaning against the door frame with her arms crossed over her chest. Her expression was unreadable, eyes stone cold.

I had just pulled a gun out at the kegger, I was so stupid.

And not only did I put it up against Topper's head at some point but I fired it into the air. I let my anger get the best of me, it could cost me my freedom, my friends, or even y/n.

I hoped she wouldn't- oh god.

"Please don't dump me!" I squeaked out.

"Dump you?" she laughed shaking her head.

"I'm being serious, why are you laughing?!?!" I panicked standing up and bringing my hands to my head.

"Cuz your funny," she walked towards the back door and left the chateau. I followed her out back, she was walking to where the rest of the pogues were eating around a fire.

I sat down beside her and grabbed a hot dog and a roasting stick.

"So, we all sorted out?" Pope asked, raising his eyebrows at our sudden appearance.

"Did she give you shit?"

John B chuckled and I flipped him off, "No, actually..."

"Damn!" Kie said. "Your lucky JJ, not many people can put up with your shenanigans-"

The conversation shifted to something royal merchant related, I ate my hot dog and snuck glances at y/n. She was wiping sticky marshmallows off her finger, but it just kept spreading all over her clothes. I looked down and my plate and smiled.

Kie was right, y/n was the only one that could deal with me. But I was also the only one that could deal with her.

We couldn't live without each other.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

My baby never fret none About what my hands and my body done If the Lord don't forgive me I'd still have my baby and my babe would have me

"Hey, y/n!" Rafe called from across the boneyard, "Your not still seeing that dirty pogue are you?"

"I'm sorry?" she said taking a sip of her beer.

Ward Cameron's evil spawn got closer and eyed me up and down, "Honestly, I can't believe you guys are still hanging on, normally JJ would have moved on to a new bitch by now-"

"Ohhhh shittttt," Kelce and Topper called from behind him.

I stood up lighting fast but y/n grabbed my arm to stop me, "How dare you!" she shamed him.

y/n knew I had a past on the island, I had slept around with a lot of girls. I made a promise to her and myself that I was done with that shit, and it was working out for the best.

y/n tossed the rest of her beer on the back of Rafe's shirt as he walked away, he whirled around fuming.

"Try us, I dare you," John B said, he and Pope were now beside me, and Rafe backed off.

Y/n was still holding my hand, rubbing her thumb over my palm.

Yeah, Rafe, try us, I dare you.

When I was kissing on my baby And she put her love down soft and sweet In the low lamp light I was free Heaven and hell were words to me

The sun from the hot day was setting behind the sky and the soft glow of the street lights began to shine. The breeze was warm and the ocean was crisp.

I dusted the sand off my board, "One more go before dark?" I asked her.

She nodded slowly, pulling her hair up into a ponytail and following me toward the water. "I'm still not so good at this Jayj," she said fidgeting with her fingers.

"No, you're doing great!" I encouraged, pushing the board into her hands, "Go on, I'm right behind you."

We joined the rest of the pogues in the water, I watched as y/n got up on her board and rode a wave all the way down. Pride rushed through me as the pogues broke out in cheers.

"LET'S GO BABY!!"

She laughed and sat down on my board paddling over to me, "I'm so fucking proud of you right now!" I said pulling her off the board and into my arms. She giggled and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Nice one squirt!" John B ruffled her hair and Kie said something about celebratory french fries on her.

I kissed her sweetly and looked into her eyes, "Your fearless, you know that?"

She just grinned at me, but I only spoke the truth, she was.

Love felt so wonderful.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you y/n," I slurred drunkenly, but it was most definitely true. Drunk words, sobber thoughts.

She giggled and buried her face in my neck.

"I'm serious!" I complained.

"Same." Y/n said, sounding just as deadly serious as I was. We locked eye contact, her gaze reaching mine.

"What if you die before y/n? Like when you're a Grandpa and all your smoking comes to bite you in the ass?" John B countered jokingly.

"Well you know, like when I die, I'll probably get buried and shit-" I felt myself start to ramble, "but then Imma be all badass, and dig my way out!"

"What the fuck?" Y/n cackled, tears brimming her eyes from laughing so hard. Kie choked on her beer and Pope gave her a few good hard slaps on the back.

"Yeah, and then I'll come to find you," I said confidently. "NO GRAVE CAN HOLD ME DOWN!!!"

The pogues broke into laughter and I held Y/n's body tighter, I would never let her go. After all we had been through together, the ups and the downs, I knew at that moment it would always be her.

When my time comes around Lay me gently in the cold dark earth No grave can hold my body down I'll crawl home to her

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#jj maybank blurb #song lyrics #work song #jj maybank #obx #outer banks #jj x reader #jj maybank x reader #hoizer #jj maybank pov #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank angst

[lvstcd]

just a memory (just a bet pt 2) ⟶ jj maybank x fem!reader

REQUESTED: "is there anyway you can do a part 2 to ‘ just a bet ‘ it was so good and i need more !!! ur writings amazing sweetheart 🫶🏻" and "part 2 of ‘ just a bet ‘ ??? please please please 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻"

A/N: thank youuuuu. i have another request for making an alternative ending where the reader lives, so this one is gonna be more angsty and filled with memories before the reader passed :)

SUMMARY: the pogues sit in silence, grieving over your death, reminiscing the good and bad memories they have of you.

GENRE: angst, swearing, fluff, death

WORD COUNT: 2.0k

PLAY IN MY ROOM BY CHANCE PENA.

(fem = female reader) not edited!!

lower case intended

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Y/N l/n's death was announced shortly after her parents left the hospital. outerbanks was in shock and filled with sadness. the well known kook-turned-pogue was killed in a tragic accident. 3 days later, the town gathered together for the first time in years to go to your funeral and wake.

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JJ sits silently in the front of john b's van as it drives towards the cemetery. everyone sits in silence while the radio makes a slight hum to whatever song was playing. kie sniffles while sarah quietly sobs in the back, leaning her head on popes shoulder.

the drive up the gravel road and observe all the pogues and kooks standing around and having small talk. sarah wipes her eyes and blows her nose while john b parks. everyone sits in silence to gather themselves for a minute.

"look at this," kie whispers, "pogues and kooks in the same place, not fighting, not being passive aggressive. just here to support y/n's family and say goodbye." everyone nods and continues watching.

"how are we supposed to go on like this?" pope asks from the back seat, "how are we supposed to move on after how we treated her? we broke her heart and her trust and within a matter of minutes, she was killed."

everyone continues to sit in silence, not responding to pope. they knew he was right. they were asking themselves the same thing from the moment they found out. they climb out of the van and start heading towards y/n's parents, greeting them with hugs and small talk.

"can everyone take a seat please?" the man yells from behind the casket, insinuating it was starting. the pogues sit down behind y/n's family, the girls in the front including kie and sarah, and the guys in the back with the rest of the pogues.

jj stares at your pale face. he observes the peaceful expression, almost like you're sleeping. he stares at you and zones out;

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"I can tell you're staring at me." y/n mumbles, keeping her eyes closed while jj lays beside her, resting his head on his hand.

"and? you're beautiful. i can't help by stare." jj smiles at his girlfriend before pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

"you're so cheesy," she giggles, "but it's okay. i love it." she smiles brightly at him, pecking his lips before sitting up and stretching.

"what are we doing today? any plans?" she asks as she lets out a yawn and rubs her eyes. jj shrugs, running a hand through his hair.

"from what i know, everyone's working or has plans. i think john b and sarah are going on date night and kie and pope are working since they've been out the last 3 days." she nods, flopping back down on the bed and cuddling into jj's chest.

"then i say we have a movie day," she pokes his cheek, "what do you think, love?"

jj nods and smiles, "sounds like a plan to me, sunshine." jj turns on the tv and hands the remote to y/n, "pick any movie you want." y/n smiles and scrolls through different movies, deciding to play a sad romance.

"have you ever seen the last song?" jj shakes his head no, "ain't no way! it has miley cyrus and luke hemsworth in it! this is the starting point of their relationship. they got together while filming this movie!" jj laughs at y/n before running his fingers through her hair, playing with it.

"play it then, sunshine. we'll watch it." she smiles and pecks jj's nose before pressing play, cuddling into his chest.

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JJ breaks from his trance, his memory of you, and lets the tears silently fall down his cheeks, not caring to wipe them. john b and pope pats his back, while he silently sobs, listening to the man in front continue on about your beautiful life.

kie sits in the front, her hand intertwined with sarah's and y/n's mother, as she stares at the ground as tears seep down her cheeks and into her black dress. she stares at the anklet on her right ankle;

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"KIE! look at this!" y/n yells from the jewelry rack. kie giggles and walks over to y/n. y/n does jazz hands at all the beach themed jewelry laid out in front fo them.

"aren't they all so beautiful?! have i ever told you how much i ADORE anklets? they're so simple yet so cute," she squeals, her smile beaming, "oh my goodness, kie. we have to get some! i have an idea! you pick one out for me, i pick one out for you! deal?"

kie laughs and nudges y/n, "deal."

"make sure you really take your time in picking mine out!" y/n ushers to the other side, observing all the anklets they had in stock. kie stared at every single one before landing on one that perfectly described you. it was a pale yellow with a sun in the middle. sunshine. that was jj's nickname to you and it was 100% true. you were the sunshine in everyone's life. so bright, so happy. they loved it about you.

"are you ready, kie?" y/n asks from the other side. kie lets out a small ready and they step aside, showcasing the anklets. y/n and kie gasp at the same time. y/n had picked the perfect anklet that matched kie and her style.

y/n and kie check out and walk out of the store. they stop at the bench right outside of the store and sit down, putting on their new anklets. "kie, this is beautiful. i love it."

"the one you picked is adorable! it's literally me in an anklet."

"i hope you know," y/n starts, smiling at kie, "i am never taking this off. it is staying on my ankle forever. even at my funeral. even when im 6 feet under. it will be with me forever."

kie smiles, "mine will be with me forever, too. no matter where we are in the world, i'll look at this anklet and think of you and how much i love you." y/n smiles, tears in her eyes.

"i love you, kk. forever and always." y/n smiles, holding her pinky with kies.

"and i love you, y/n/n. forever and always."

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KIE moves her gaze to y/ns legs, catching the faded yellow anklet on her right ankle. kie chews on her bottom lip, trying so hard to not let the loud sobs out. what would she do with the anklet if she was still here? would she burn it? would she throw it at kie in anger? would kie be y/n's "little kk" anymore? would she ever forgive her? or would she keep the anklet on her because it was apart of her now? kie squeezes her eyes shut and lets out a quiet sob, her fingers gripping harder on sarah and mrs. l/n's hands.

sarah squeezes kie's hand back. as she squeezes harder, she stares down at the faded beaded bracelet on her left wrist. memories flashing in;

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

"SARAH!" y/n smiles brightly, opening her arms wide to give sarah a hug. "how are you, my little green bean?" she asks, slinging her arm around sarah's shoulder as the walk to the fire at the kegger.

"i'm good, sweet pea." sarah smiles, leaning her head against y/n's.

"you ready to get fucked up?" y/n giggles as she grabs two beers from the keg stand and hands one to sarah.

"always." sarah winks at y/n clutching her hand and swinging it as the walk towards the rest of the pogues. they sit at the fire and converse with everyone around them. a couple hour later, the pogues decide to head out. everyone heads back the chateau, drunk and giggling.

"green beannnnn!" y/n yells from jj's room, stumbling out with two beaded bracelets in her hands.

"yes sweet pea??" sarah smiles from john b's bed, her hair a mess.

"look what i made you!!" y/n squeals, handing sarah the beaded bracelet, reading 'green bean', "and i made one for me! it say's "sweet pea!!" sarah laughs and pulls y/n into a bear hug.

"i love you, green bean." y/n mumbles into her neck.

"i love you, more, sweet pea."

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

SARAH rests her head on kies shoulder, the tears on her cheeks sliding down onto kies dress. she misses you so much. you were her best friend. the number one person she would die for.

john b reaches in front, squeezing sarah's shoulder. he stares at your face, your pale skin, and the scar on the outer corner of your right eye;

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

"JOHNNY." y/n greets john b as she climbs on the boat. "how are you today, sugar plum?" she jokes, poking his cheek. john b laughs and starts up the engine again, "same as every day, y/n/n."

"john b, toss me a beer!" jj yells from beside y/n, holding his hand out to reach it. john b tosses a can to jj, hitting y/n in the face on the way.

"oh shit! y/n, are you okay?"

"jesus fuck, johnny. did u aim for my right eye?" she laughs, holding the wound. the blood seeps down her fingers.

"fuck, jj, get a towel. it cut her."

"it's okay! im good." she insists, wiping the blood that repeatedly keeps running down her cheek and hand.

jj moves y/n's hand and presses the towel to the cut while john b stops the boat and grabs another towel to wipe the blood from her hands.

"i'm so sorry, y/n/n. i didn't mean to." y/n laughs, wiping some of the blood left on her palm on john b's cheek.

"paybacks a bitch, johnny." she snorts, laughing her ass off. john b chuckles, grabbing an couple ice cubes and wrapping a towel around it before handing it to her.

"a makeshift ice pack for you, miss l/n." he jokes, jj moves the towel from the cut and lets y/n put the ice back to the bruise/cut.

"you wait, johnny. one day i'm going to show up in your bedroom in the dead of night with a beer can and throw it at you, too." she laughs, causing john b to laugh, too.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

JOHN b frowns, looking down at the ground while pope cries and shakes his head, staring off into space;

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

"HIYA, pope!" y/n smiles at the boy, sitting beside him at the fire. he smiles, sipping his beer.

"hiya, y/n." he chuckles, gripping the beer can so it doesn't slip out of his hand.

"i just realized i don't have a nickname for you." she points, furrowing her eyesbrows together.

"i really don't need one-"

"kpope. like kpop but kpope. sodapope. tempope." she kept going on, causing pope to laugh loudly.

"y/n, i-"

"oh my gosh! i got it! electropope! actually, i will just call you all the ones i listed because i'm creative and funny." she beams, sipping her beer.

the rest of the night, pope and y/n spent the night making weird nicknames for eachother regarding their names.

"you know pope," y/n slurred, "you're like my brother. the brother i never had. no matter what you did, i would always be there for you and forgive you. theres no one in this world like you. and i will always support you. forever."

"i love you, y/n/n. thank you."

"i love you too, kpope. now. no more sappy stuff. i need another beer!"

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

THE pogues stand at your casket, hands full of dirt. as the drop the dirt int your grave, they say their goodbyes and apologies. their i love you's.

at the end of the day, they never knew if you would've forgave them. it took sometime, but they eventually only thought of the good moments with you. and they liked to believe that no matter how bad the situation was, they would always love you. and you loved them, too. because they were your family.

✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆

TAGLIST: @pappydaddy @slytherinambitious @instabull

#jj outer banks #jj x y/n #jj x reader #jj fanfiction #jj angst #jj mayback x reader #jj maybank smut #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank #john b routledge #john b angst #john b obx #john b x reader #john b #kiara carrera #kie carrera #pope heyward #outerbanks pope #obx2 #outerbanks #obx #obx jj #outer banks x reader #rudy pankow outer banks #outer banks fanfiction #sarah cameron #topper thornton #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron

[parsnippety]

Brainstorming-

Mkay I have several ideas for alien/human posts so I'm putting them here before I forget. If this gets popular maybe I'll actually write some lol

Songs/singing : sounds being very powerful w/ other species; the most severe (?) sounds you'll find are soft clicks/rumbling and most languages developed through touch / what we'd call sign language. So these species are mesmerized by human singing cause they either can't do it / don't have enough control over the pitch of their voice or they "hear" by feeling vibrations and process tones differently.

This has endless possibilities- a human singing softly while working and causing some extreme reaction in the mechanics of the ship or their crewmates, humans taking over ships by accessing the intercom system, humans knowing the first thing to do if they're kidnapped is to yell at a really low pitch then a really high one cause chances are one of them will do something, videos of humans harmonizing becoming really popular (and being banned in several galaxies), two humans realizing they both know a song with a harmony and proceeding to sing it (causing everyone on the ship to stop what they're doing and just listen in awe), sign language becoming the main form of communication and ships having soundproof rooms so humans can talk to each other / themselves...

Species variation : most species didn't figure out efficient space travel for millions of years. Pair that with gene editing (to get rid of "imperfections"- usually this portion of the species' history is their "dark age"), and each individual looks pretty much identical. Most species have some sort of fetishized/slur word for individuals with any kind of abnormality, cause they're really really rare at this point. Think crocodiles; maybe some color variations but they've stayed more or less the same for millions of years. But humans? No two look the same- except maybe identical twins, but they could have different haircuts (don't even get me started on body modifications- other species do it, sure, but humans are already so different that it makes them a nightmare to teach about.) And in space the beauty standards are all over the place so if you want tattooed stripes you can get them- but wait, aren't there already some humans with stripes? And pointed ears? Dyed hair?

There's also the constant battle between human willpower and circumstance. When other species carefully figure out how to turn and move around an obstacle, humans are literally slingshotting themselves off of it. But for every death-defying feat, there are God knows how many feat-defying deaths. One human got an adrenaline rush and lifted an entire gnarflax. Another fainted 'cause they stood up too fast. Most species have clearly defined limits, so there's no pressure to push past them.

And mimicry : As if humans' vocal range isn't enough (what's that clicking? Sounds like a xhrhghfnl from my home planet- nope, it's John. Machinery malfunctioning? Alarms? Nope. F***ing John.), they can also make disguises and act. See, most species can manipulate the holograms or whatever but there's no way they'd be able to do convincing impressions in real time. Just going for it? Completely irrational.

One time, a human even convinced an entire rhusngi fleet that she was a rhusngi inspector "in disguise". (Honestly that line should've given it away but it walked and moved with the same mannerisms- the same- I don't even know. We were completely- what's that human expression?- shook.)

Not knowing what someone's going/been through unless they tell you is a completely novel concept. Imagine a human acting all violent when you take over their ship so you put 'em in the brig somehow, only to pull up the camera feed later and see them sobbing or completely frozen in a fetal position, or even worse- hurting themselves somehow. But the second you go down there, they're spitting curses at you and showing zero signs of weakness.

If anyone wants to write about these pls go right ahead. Sorry if they've already been done/overused (if they have, please lmk so I can go read them).

#humans are space orcs #humans are weird #humans are space australians #humans and aliens #random ideas #brainstorm

[rinbowaman]

HHP - Chapter 10 part 1 (18+MDNI)

Part 1! Enjoy.

Warnings: Forceful intimidation, threats, mentions or hints of murder or torture, and of course smut. Hardly proofread as I just wanted to quickly get this edited and out to yall since you've been really digging the last few chapters. I love all the mssages and anon asks, they're so fun to read.

I love the smut scene in this one, you're about to find out why ;)

The following day after your heartfelt conversation with Heeseung, while involving that intense and orgasmic filled session that transpired in the middle of it, you felt the rigid soreness in between your legs that reminded you of the number of times you and Heeseung felt the release of pleasure.

The overstimulation hinting at you, causing you to tell him that you would need a break for a few days. He merely scoffed as he gave you a smirk and nodded as he pulled you in for a kiss.

He already knew, judging by the way you had sobbed into his neck during, Heeseung could tell that he did a number on you. He loved it.

A few days forward, you both had plans to meet up with the rest of the group later for dinner and karaoke at a local bar. You were excited for the event, eating a plethora of food with friends as you take turns singing sounded wonderful, and you were eager to sing a duet song with Heeseung.

As he dropped you off, opened your door and pulled you in for a hug, wishing you a good day at class, you gave him a kiss as he softly sang a tune as his lips remained attached to yours…

“Cause I’m off my face, in love with you. I’m out my head, so into you, and I don’t know how you do it, by I’m forever ruined by you…ooh ooh ooh.”

You were taken aback by the softness in his voice as he sang the tune against your lips while gazing into your eyes.

‘Whoa…’

“Heeseung…you sing?”  you inquired as he carried out his tune in perfect harmony with the flow of the lyrics, all in perfect melody.

“Mmm just a little. I was born with a rare ability and can identify musical notes, so I guess you can say I can carry a tune here and there.”

Modest as ever, he barely speaks of his unique ability and briefly denotes his hobby of singing for fun, as you stood, remaining in shock at how lovely his serenading tone was.

“I didn’t know that. That’s so cool.” You remarked. Once you spoke out, he raises a brow as he smirked down at you, giving you a feeling that he was thinking of something as he started to scoff, giving you a devious look in his eye.

“What?”

“Mmm….” He softly mumbles as he leans in closer to you, reaching around your neck with his hand, he collects your hair away from your ear, pushing your locks around your back as he gracefully groups the strands to swing over your opposite shoulder, leaving your ear exposed for him to whisper into it, his breath slightly tickling you.

“You really want to know?”

You felt a chill ride up your spine. What was he thinking about? The soreness in between your legs didn’t seem so painful anymore now that he was whispering into your ear, touching your neck, having a gentle hold of your hair as he ran his fingers through the collected strands. You started to feel aroused, though you refrained from making it so obvious as to maintain the break that you knew your body physically needed. Responding softly, you issued out a whispered “Yes…” right back.

Feeling his lips chuckle and smiling against your ear, the tickle made you tilt your head inward, trying to peel his lips away, yet his hold on you and the feel of his mouth remained on your ear as he breathed against it. Whispering, ever so delicately yet harshly emphasizing his words, he informs you…

“When I’m fucking you, I mentally denote every single pitch in your voice when you scream, and let me tell you baby….the tone in your voice is the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”

You nearly collapsed at his words. Not only did this man have a gift of identifying pitches in musical instruments and songs…but in people’s voices? And…he’s been denoting the tones you moan out every intimate moment you shared with him…this whole time?

Speechless with a pungent sensation that grew in your chest, you couldn’t tell if you were overwhelmed, shy, or just in love all over again as he chuckles against your ear once more.

“Want me to show you?”

You knew you should have said ‘no’ and went on your way to class, and had you been with anyone else, you would have. But Heeseung always influenced you as he would lure you in with his words, his voice, and the way his damn hands felt so good by touching you, roaming every inch of your body.

Nodding your head, he pulls you in by the waist as his head leans back away from your ear. He faces you, giving you a gaze under heavy lids as he bites his bottom lip down, raising a brow in a notion that told you you were in for a surprise. Your heart nearly stopped beating at that look he was giving you, along with the slight bit of his teeth showing as he bit down on his flesh.

Not breaking his devilish gaze on you, he takes a step back, pulling you in with him as he opens the car door to the back seat, pulling you in with him as he closes the door shut. Thank God he decided to park in an actual parking space in the back next to the tree line and not by the front curb as per usual. The privacy of the trees partially hiding the car as well as the lack of students roaming on the lot, you both remained secluded in the parked car as he rested you to sit on his lap, with your back facing him.

His hands rested gently on your waist, you felt him pull you to where your back rested against his chest, with his chin resting on your shoulder. The weather was still pleasant as the fall season began to hit, you took the remaining bit of the decent weather to your advantage and wore a semi-flared mini skirt of satin material, while your shirt was a quarter sleeve, v-neck tee that was made of stretchable fabric.

Pulling the collar of your blouse off to the side to expand the v-neck opening while exposing your shoulder, he softly kisses you, moving upwards to your neck, and then up against your ear.

Reaching down with both hands, he starts to pull down your panties. Reaching down as far as he could without disrupting your posture, he slides them down towards your knees, encouraging you to remove them completely as you lifted your legs slightly and slid them off, removing them over your feet after discarding your low-heeled shoes.

With his mouth open, he exhales, while issuing out a faint tone in his voice as he ushered out the combination of his breathing and voice into your ear. Your body trembles.

His hands began their movement on your breasts, caressing them and slightly squeezing them, he starts to move his body against yours as he presses your weight down by the hold he had on your fleshy mounds. He was steady, slow, and hard, but it felt so good and relaxing, the pain of the soreness felt as if it disappeared as the only thing you could feel was the arousal of the moisture your glands were producing, secreting from the crevice of your delicate entry.

Gently rocking your body with his, he moves his hands down, the bill of his cap pressed against your hair caused it to fall back from his head, revealing all of his facial features. Turning your face to the side as you continued to gaze at his hands, he took advantage of your features becoming paralleled with his, as he engaged in a soft and tender kiss.

You felt a hand come up, caressing your neck as his thumb strokes your throat, massaging it, coaxing the muscles to relax, which felt soothing considering you woke up this morning with your voice a bit raspy from all the screaming and crying you succumbed to last night from his rough discretion. Yet this time, he was so gentle, he was so hard and firm but smooth and tranquil with the way his body was rolling against yours, it felt so erotically pleasing that you began to moan into his kiss.

Pulling back just a little as he continued to kiss your lips softly, in between his words he began denoting the solfege of the moans you released into his kiss.

“La…” he whispers against your lips, re-engaging the kiss once more. Upon hearing and feeling the breath of his whisper as he denotes your vocal tone, you moaned yet again, lowly as your body quivers. In between the kiss, without pulling his head back, he humms into your mouth before speaking softly in a deep tone.

“Mm. Do-flat.”

His hands move down from your breast, reaching your waist as he pulls your slinky shirt upwards, exposing your breast that were cradled by the very thin lace bra you had on. Pulling the material aside, he exposes your bare mounds to the cool air as your shirt remains rolled up against your collar bones. Once he had your chest fully exposed, his fingers began to play with the tips of your areola’s, rubbing them in between his fingers as he gives out a gentle squeeze, causing you to wince and yelp into his mouth.

“Ti…” again, he speaks softly in a low tone against your mouth in between the passionate kiss that was now all on him to perform as you were repeatedly panting out your moans, barely able to function as you felt him coating your lips and the corners of your mouth with his saliva, the movement of your body going up and down had caused you to become unstill as he conducted the performance, causing you to shift as his tongue would coat you inside and out.

His hands moved down yet again, taking advantage of the thin satin material of the wrap skirt you had on, he unties the string that binds the skirt together. Coming undone, you felt the material slide off from around your waist and the cool air attacks the flesh of your sensitive parts.

Being mindful that you were feeling sore this morning, he takes two of his fingers and places them on the plush lips in between your thighs, gently spreading them apart to allow the air to access your slit.

With his middle finger, he avoids touching the clit as that had been the part that was stinging the most, which he somehow knew without you even telling him. Avoiding aggravating the ache of it, he instead focuses on your opening, barely inserting the tip of his pad inside to trigger your muscles in producing moisture. Once he felt the slightest bit of slickness inside, he entered the remainder of his lengthy finger, along with his index pointer to accompany the middle.

Tilting your head back as you moaned out in a whining tune, he hums against your neck as if he found your moans appetizing.

“Mmm…Sol” he softly mumbles against your skin.

Your body begins to shake uncontrollably, your core muscles tense up, and you react by holding on to his wrists as he continued, softly kissing your neck repeatedly.

“Yeah baby.” He encourages you, loving the feel of you grabbing him out of the internal panic you were succumbing to from the intense sensation. Your body still shifting up and down as his hips rolled into you, causing his lips to apply soft kisses in a range between your neck and shoulder.

Without stopping his movements, tenaciously waving into your body, you feel him reach underneath you and undo the zipper to his jeans. Pulling out his lengthy shaft, the warm and hard muscle your skin memorized as it grazes against your thigh, he gently lets the springiness of its form to remain free as it rests against your opening, it’s girth sliding up and down against you as his hips continued with the slow and steady rolls of bucking into you from underneath as you remained seated on his lap.

Leaving his shaft unattended by his hand for only a moment, he raises his hand while he gripped your waist with the other, presenting it to your face, he lays his palm open and flat as he whispers into your ear.

“Spit baby…”

Doing as he bids, you balled up a collection of saliva in your mouth, releasing it into his palm as a line of spit forms between your parted lips and his hand. Lowering it, he massages his cock, stroking it with your precious saliva for a few seconds, before he proceeded to enter.

So much for a break. You knew internally, that you weren’t going to last long anyhow, knowing the way he was with you and how you easily caved in, much less put up with the pain, because in the end, pleasure or not, you loved every moment of what he does to you.

Steadily, he enters the bulgy tip inside, stretching you out. Due to leaving your clit alone, you felt only a slight bit of a burn from the stretch, but it was followed by immense pleasure as he gently remained steady with the slow and hard tempo he had, not wanting to go as hard as he did last night, knowing that you had already dealt with a lot from his roughness. Now, he wanted you to feel the firmness of his warm and tender side.

With his body never ceasing the motions of rolling against you, his shaft thrusts into you inch by inch, causing you to moan aloud as you felt him stuff you. Dear God, it felt so good.

“Uugh…oh my God-“ you moaned out, gasping for air as his thrusts took your breath away, literally. There was a slight tinge of sharpness in your chest from the lack of oxygen you were experiencing, yet, it was so pleasurable, you wanted to experience it for a lifetime.

“Fa-Do sharp.” He continues to denote as he licks your neck.

“He-Heeseung…” You moaned out, your brows furrowed as your expression reeked of overwhelming pleasure.

“Sol, C-sharp.” He continues, not even acknowledging you calling out his name other than denoting the tone you gasped out as you called it.

“Oh! Ugh! He-Heeseung!” you yell out in a quivering moan as you felt him pick up the pace. He quickens his thrusts, yet still refrained from being rough with you, instead, he continued to be firm, but not at all ferocious as he was last night. To exaggerate how he wanted you to feel pleasure over pain this time around, he refrained from letting his Ethan side emerge. Today was all for you since you allowed him to have his moment last night, though it wasn’t necessarily by choice.

With a steady and fastened rhythm, he thrusts inside you, causing the flow of moisture inside to slowly build up, and come out as it coats his shaft, forming a sticky and thick substance that produced a shine as it glazed the smooth skin of his shaft.

Moaning and panting like a rabid dog, you felt your body bounce as the momentum of the thrusting became buoyant from you grabbing on to his wrists, which stemmed a foundational support of your frame that he needed as he bucked his hips upward, causing you to remain in the perfect position for him to fuck into you, hard, but not at all rough.

Moaning and panting out at a high tempo, the car was filled with nothing, but the sounds of your voice and the fractioning sounds of the leather seating caused by the sporadic distribution of your weight as you were raised up and brought down in repeated motion against his groin as the feeling of being stuffed repeatedly by his girth melted you.

The skin of your walls wrapped around him so tightly, continuously coating his muscle as he thrusted, making you bounce up and down in a heightened pace. You couldn't breathe from all the gasping, the moaning, the harshness of the exhales forced out of you, yet you loved every single second of it as your hair bounces off both, your body and his frame.

As you continued to moan out the intense pleasure of the act, he continued to denote the ranges of your vocal cords.

“Do-La…Mi sharp….Sol…..Ti….Rei-Fa….La-flat.”

His soothing voice as he gasps in between each time he accurately denotes the range of your pitch caused you to become overwhelmed with lustful passion, he was so damn attractive with the way he knew everything about you, to include the cords of your voice.

With a final thrust, he slams into you, causing you to scream as he remains fully inside, yet rolls your hips back and forth as you succumb to your orgasm. He does the same, releasing everything he had inside you.

“So….Mi….ah, fuck….” He softly gasps out in a pleasuring state as he finishes his release, coating your inner walls white with his essence.

Pinning your weight to remain hard against his, you felt the gentle bucking of his hips as his length remained fully stuffed inside you, until he slowly decreased the pace and you were able to finally lean back and relax against his chest. Catching your breath as your walls quivered around his member from the orgasmic high you had just experienced, you steadied yourself.

You often felt joy at the prospect of spending your life with Heeseung for many reasons, but among all, your favorite had been the thought of spending an eternity in receiving the pleasures of his love for you, which was a feeling that you’ve never felt before. The way he not only brought you to cum, but the intensity of the orgasms he gave you was just blissfully unexplainable.

Kissing you passionately as you regained composure while your soft moans begin to die out inside his mouth, you feel his tongue massaging your mouth as he commits to massaging your throat once more.

After hearing how your moans became airy and breathless towards the end, he knew that the back of your throat had become dry from the constant panting, thus he coaxed it to regain moisture by spitting into your mouth and continue his massage at the center of your neck.

His tongue reaches as far back into your mouth, rubbing up against the roof and pushing the balled-up spit to travel further down. How you loved this man and his passion for you.

After the session, he helped you get dressed. Bidding you a good day, for real this time, as he kisses you and sees you off.

Once you entered the sub building, you opted to wait in the lobby as the class was nearly coming to an end. You figured you would meet up with the teacher to inform him that you had to attend a personal matter and collect the materials and lessons from the session and go straight into the second class of the day.

As you waited inside the lobby, you realized you forgot your planner, which had contained all of your structured, scheduled assignments and deadlines. You must have left it inside his car after that session, still recovering from the high and not even realizing that you left it behind.

Texting Heeseung, you leave your books and bag on the table, considering no one was in the lobby and you intended to step out just for a second, hoping that Heeseung didn’t drive off too far for him to turn back, you drafted your message and hit send as you walk out into the narrow hall towards the main entrance of the building.

Your eyes were glued onto the screen, and the building was so quiet with everyone inside their respective classrooms, that you didn’t even realize the quiet and solid form of someone walking towards you, bumping into you rather harshly, causing you to drop your phone right as you hit ‘send.’

Looking up as you stumbled half a step back, you looked at the person before you. A man, who appeared to be around the same age as Heeseung, possibly his mid twenty’s, yet he was built rather large with a tall height. Really tall, in fact, he seemed like he was the same height or maybe even slightly taller than Heeseung. He had on so much muscle, he looked as if he lived in the gym with the number of bulging ripples throughout his exposed arms. Unlike Samuel and the effects of his steroid usage, this man had not soft or fluffy in his definition, you could tell he was hard muscle. He was built like a wrestler or perhaps even a professional football player.

Looking at you wide-eyed, you apologized for your lack of attention.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t see you-“ you began as you sincerely gave a half smile, yet he cuts you off with a firm voice.

“Wow. You’re a sight to behold, what’s your name? Haven’t seen you around here before.” Obviously attracted to your looks, you let out a nervous chuckle as you tuck your hair behind your ear, trying to be polite while also wanting to end the conversation and head out to meet up with Heeseung.

“Oh, I’m Y/n. And I’m in my first year. Again, I’m so sorry for bumping into yo-“ he cuts you off once more.

“Y/n? That’s a pretty name. Do you guy by any nicknames? I bet I could come up with a few that would be fitting. Do you do modeling work? Have you ever thought about it?” His inquiries were coming off strong as he smiled at you.

You weren’t feeling at all comfortable, yet still wanted to maintain a form of politeness as you shook your head to his questions, and tried to excuse yourself  by issuing a “sorry, I have to meet with someone.” and walk around him, but he stops you the moment your body becomes parallel to his, by closing you in against the wall.

“S-sorry?...” you uttered out as you began to feel nervous at his discretion.

“You’re super pretty. You know, me and my friends are in the entertainment business, you ever thought of doing something in that field? Pretty girl like you…” he eyes you up and down, “shouldn’t have to worry about college when you can use what you were born with.”

Your breathing becomes rigid with the slight bit of fear as the man was much larger than you, larger than Samuel and Heeseung put together. His choice of wording came off heavy as he relentlessly complimented you in an offensive manner, causing you to become silent, as your eyes slightly turned glossy, while you desperately tried to figure out a way out this.

“U-um…my boyfriend is waiting for me, I have to go-“ he cuts you off, again.

“Boyfriend huh? Is he the possessive type? Would he have any issues with you doing modeling on the side? You know there’s big money in that.” He continues his verbal offense.

You shook your head and gave the man an expression that hinted your discomfort of the situation, to which he just scoffed as he studied your face.

“You know, the more you look like that, the more of you I want to see. Never seen a face like yours, this is really a good day. You' might be the next big thing. Why don’t you come meet with me and my crew, we can show you all the cameras and hey, maybe we can even introduce you to some of the models we work with.”

You shook your head and reiterated that you were meeting with your boyfriend, to which the man grabbed you by the wrist at your statement.

“Oh don’t worry, you can text him, he can even meet us there. I insist, you would make it into the big times, you got such a nice body to go with that pretty face. I bet you look really sexy with some makeup on.” he starts to pull you away, yet you remained with your back attached to the wall, grabbing onto the rail that lined all throughout the wall in the hallway.

“Please…let go. I really need to go.” You spoke firmly. His hand held onto your wrist harshly as he squeezes.

“It will just be for a second, my van is parked right in the back.” He muses as he laughs in between his words.

Remaining with a tight grip on the rail for dear life, you felt the stretch of your arm as he pulls, with your wrist attached to his hand as he takes steps in the opposite direction.

“Be a little more trusting, I’m not going to hurt you…not at all. You might actually enjoy it, not to mention, I always pay my girls, I pay them well. How much you want per shot? I can pay you $500 for each photo.” He speaks out, causing you to shake with panic as you felt the tears overflowing in your eyes, how were you going to fight this man off?

As you stared at the ground, with the man’s words echoing in your brain, a sudden flash of a figure comes in before you, a loud smack is heard. Looking up, you see Heeseung standing in front of you, his arm harshly pulling you in as he wraps it around your waist.

The hard smack you heard, after observing your planner laying on the floor with the mysterious man’s face turned off to the side, must have been from when Heeseung took the book with it’s hard cover and smacked it against his cheek, while gripping on to his arm connected to the hand that gripped your wrist in a forceful manner. The man didn’t let go of your wrist, yet you felt a relief as Heeseung brought the man’s arm inward, causing the stretch of his pull from when he tried prying you off the rail to decrease, allowing a soothing bend to occur at your elbow as Heeseung held his arm steady, providing you some release from the strain of the pull.

“Let go of her.” He speaks out firmly. You watch as he became half and half of Heeseung and Ethan, sensing the issue you were in.

The man slowly turned his face forward, his cheek bright and flashy red from Heeseung’s throw of the planner.

“Huh…are you the boyfriend? Well shit…so she has a thing for tall lean dudes, eh?” Remarking Heeseung’s frame as he adorned semi-loose and casual attire with a light jacket on.

“Maybe you’re confused, I wasn’t asking you. I’m telling you, let go of her wrist.” Heeseung firmly issues his words through gritted teeth as he smacked his lips with his eyes widening, his Ethan side coming out more so as his wide gaze reeked of a murderous one.

As you watched him give off a death stare from beneath his cap, you hear him release a low growl, the way it vibrated with a hellish tone, it frightened even you. It wasn’t like all the other noises he made whenever he was peeved or even aroused, during sex. This was something far different.

The man lost the form of his smile as he looked at Ethan’s eyes, you could tell by his expression that he became somewhat confused and perhaps, a little uneasy as Ethan’s expression became dark and twisted.

With a low chuckle, Ethan continues.

“How about you and I go take this outside behind the parking lot, away and out of sight, huh?” Ethan gives a sinister smirk as his voice spoke deeply in a low tone.

The man merely laughs at him before turning on a serious expression.

“You know, that doesn’t sound too bad. Maybe once we have a ‘talk’ in a quiet place, that will leave me to make this pretty thing into a star without any interference from you.” The man replies.

Ethan responds.

“Ahh…you shouldn’t touch what doesn’t belong to you. Might have to break some fingers to teach you a lesson." he scoffs out, his eyes so wide, they looked as if they were about to pop out of the sockets as the color of his iris nearly took over all the white details of his eyeballs, he looked…demonic.

Just then, a high-pitched voice emerged out of nowhere from behind the burly man.

‘Tiff?’...

Part 2

#heeseung smut #heeseung x reader #heeseung scenarios #heeseung hard thoughts #heeseung hard hours #enhypen smut #enha x reader #enha heeseung

[cursed-man-prayers]

seven, heartstopper, & the love of queer childhood

Please picture me in the trees I hit my peak at seven

Seven has been one of my favorite Taylor Swift songs since it came out in 2020. Its placement on the album, the structure of its lyrics, and even the production highlight the themes of a childhood bond that stretches beyond concrete memory and, in my opinion, the experience of being a queer kid.

Month ago, Alice Oseman said in an Instagram story that seven is a Tara/Darcy song. When I watched s2.ep8 of Heartstopper and seven came on as Tara and Darcy repeated declared their (romantic, sapphic/lesbian) love for each other, I cried. As it continued over the prom "after party" scene, I sobbed.

At its core, Heartstopper is about queer youth and found family, bonds that go deeper than the average teenage friendship. There's a lightness that runs through the show, even as difficult subjects are navigated. Darcy's abusive mother, Nick's struggle to support Charlie, Charlie's suffering mental health. So much queer media gets driven to dark, hopeless places. There's a reason the Bury Your Gays trope is so infamous. Heartstopper is subversive in its joy and hopefulness. I can't think of a better Taylor song to fit that message than seven.

I've been meaning to tell you I think your house is haunted Your dad is always mad and that must be why

I think you should come live with me and we can be pirates then you won't have to cry

While these lyrics aren't included in the scene, I think the context matters (especially the next line but we'll get to that). There's this innocent perspective of living in an unsafe or abusive home, that, regardless of the actual cause, leads the narrator to ask the muse to run away with them. In an earlier episode, Nick and Charlie talk about running away to Paris together. In the comics, Darcy jokes about moving in with Tara. During the sleepover in episode 1, the squad jokes about moving in with Tao. Heartstopper is about more than just Nick and Charlie. Since season one, we've seen the group find each other or become closer. The reason the show works is that, despite the realities of homophobia, transphobia, mental illness, etc., there is joy and safety and protection in the friend group.

Or hide in the closet

When the lyrics come back after an instrumental break, the edit of the song/scene highlights this lyric. Which makes sense, considering a major theme of the season was the realities of coming out and being out. But you won't have to...hide in the closet isn't really about being out and open to the entire world or your family. It's about not having to hide around the people who truly love you for who you are.

During the fight between Darcy and her mother at the end of ep7, Darcy yells My friends love me. As in, "even if you don't love or accept me the way I am, I know the people who do." The moment over which seven plays is the moment where Darcy lets down her guard long enough to accept and give that love from/to Tara. And then we watch the rest of the group give and accept that love with each other.

Passed down like folk songs, the love lasts so long

#gaylor #gaylor swift #heartstopper #taylor swift #heartstopper season 2 #tara darcy #folklore #nick and charlie

[xjustonemoremiraclex]

rwrb thoughts from someone who hasn't read the book (yet)

The good/general thoughts:

pleasantly surprised by the acting! which I know sounds mean, but listen, I saw these guys in other things and I wasn't suuuper into them, so it was a nice surprise lol

THE CHEMISTRY BETWEEN THE TWO again, pleasantly surprised by that lol they played off each other SO well

10/10 soundtrack, it definitely took inspiration from older rom-coms and I loved it <3

PS I really liked all the side characters! I wish we'd gotten to spend a little more time with some of them, but everyone was pretty great <3 also, all the women were awesome, and I am very gay and very in love <3

Ok, I really, REALLY liked how they showed the two of them texting each other, and the whole editing around it. It was pretty cute

I was living for all the latine songs at the new year's party, that was a nice touch

ok, when everyone was getting down at the party and alex and henry stayed up and stared at each other and time slowed down, I know it was supposed to be romantic, but I have to say it: it was also the funniest shit I've ever seen lol

henry at the party is giving both 'i have social anxiety and my only friend here is a social butterfly and keeps leaving to be with other people send help' and 'i thought you invited me here as a first date kind of thing but you're dancing and making out with other people and i'm feeling so betrayed rn :('

'christ you're as thick as it gets *kiss*' LMAO

Listen, I'm not usually into rom-coms (I say, like a liar), but I was pretty happy with the writing, in general. I laughed at all the funny parts, got emotional over all the dramatic ones and swooned at the romance bits. Great job, everyone

'I just can't afford for you to fall in love with me' LMAO babe, we're WAY past that. On both sides

ok, full disclosure: I don't really like sex scenes all that much (there's nothing wrong with them, I'm just very ace lol), so I usually just use my phone while they're happening, and while I did that a little bit here too, I was still paying attention, and honestly, they were pretty sweet. They did a good job. And, like, I have no idea why the film was R-rated lol you literally don't see anything

again, love the little montages that show the passing of time, while also showing they're keeping in touch and getting to know each other better and stuff. It makes the relationship between the two and the way it's developing feel a bit less rushed, which is nice

ZAHRA MY MOST BELOVED

YES PLEASE I WANT TO SEE THAT POWERPOINT PRESENTATION THANK YOU

KARAOKEEEE

alex giving an impassioned romantic speech to henry, about to confess his love: // henry:

'I didn't want to break his heart' - oh, honey, you already did :(

'to tell you that I love you, knowing that you wouldn't say it back' brb sobbing

NOT CAN'T HELP FALLING IN LOVE 😭😭😭

'because when they write the history of my life, I want it to include you and my love for you' help i'm dying 😭😭😭😭😭😭

MIGUEL DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW IT WAS YOU please die in a fire <3

alex's speech was really good by the way 🥺

LOVESICK HOMOSEXUALS LMAO ZAHRA MY BELOVED

'baby' screaming crying throwing up jgdkfk

I FORGOT THE KING WAS STEPHEN FRY why is this so funny to me

SEQUEL WHEN

The... less good?/general questions:

Kinda wish there'd been a bit more enemies in my enemies-to-lovers film

'he just grabbed my hair in a way that made me understand the difference between rugby and footbal'' - please, I beg you, someone smarter than me - what the fuck does this mean 😭 ppl are LIVING for this quote and I'm like ??????

this is probably me being stupid and ignorant lol but why would alex's relationship cost his mum the election? like, from what I've seen, her government has been very pro-queer, that's not really a secret, so her son being queer and in a relationship with a man shouldn't lose her any voters..? the people who are against 'the queers' were not going to vote for her in the first place, soooo..? me is confused

honestly, this is probably an unpopular opinion, but... the king was not that bad? like, i'm not saying he's not kind of homphobic and kind of a dick lol but i get the impression that everything stems from the whole thing about sticking to tradition and public image and bla bla. Like, again, obviously, part of that involves homophobia, but I think that on a personal level, he... doesn't really care? Even at the end, he's like 'ok, are you absolutely sure about this, cause there's no going back. Yes? Really? Well, go off I guess *long-suffering sigh*'. Like, I got way more homophobic vibes from phillip than the king idk 🤷‍♀️ (I really hope I don't have to clarify that this only applies to the film, and not like, the real life crown lol)

Sooo, as I said, I haven't read the book yet, but I've seen some posts about it, and I think after watching the film I've realized that it's biggest flaw is that it's that - a film. It's a great film, don't get me wrong! And it's pretty obvious I really liked it. But damn, I'm a firm believer that book adaptations only work as series. They don't have to be super long or anything, but there is just no way to fit everything in a book in a two hour film. And yeah, when you're adapting something you have to make some changes, but Idk, it's kind of a shame that you lose so much (and even without reading the book, I can tell there's a lot of stuff missing). In any case, I can't talk too much about it until I read the book, but yeah 🤷‍♀️ It does seem like they did a good job, though - like, it genuinely can stand on its own really well, but I guess I'll have to find out for myself

Also, tagging @silassstingy bc I promised her my thoughts on the film and she might give me some interesting insights on some of the stuff I mentioned, cause she's a queen like that <3

#rwrb #all in all I give it like a 9.5/10 #I'm docking half a point bc it made me cry multiple times which was VERY rude(?)

[kaddyssammlung]

This Place Will Become Your Tomb

(Transcript from the Revolver mag Special Edition)

I don't own any of this! TW! SH and "unaliving"

Released in September 2021, as the world was finally reopening in the wake of the pandemic, Sleep Token's second album, This Place Will Become Your Tomb, marks a significant evolutionary leap from the masked band's previous work. Lyrically and narratively, it's both darker and more nuanced. In terms of world building, it's more complex with additional layers of meaning hidden in the artwork for the record and the merch released in conjunction with it. Musically, it's more cohesive and mature. Lyrically, This Place Will BecomeYour Tomb traces a tumultuous emotional arc. The album opens with the crystalline Atlantic, a song that most fans seem to agree is about the aftermath of a suicide attempt. Vessel wakes up surrounded by unnamed people who “talk me through the damage, consequence and how it's a pain they know they don't understand”. They sob as “they turn to statues at the bedside”.

Flood me like Atlantic, bandage up the trenches. vessel croons is expressing that some have theorized is a wish for death by drowning, echoing the image. On the album's cover, a humanoid figure submerged arms outstretched in bubbling water. Whatever the preferred method, vessel's reasons for his suicide attempt remain ambiguous. Is he trying to escape Sleep to rid himself of the tremendous pain their toxic dynamic causes him? Or does death offer a path for them to be closer? Either way, he desires to leave this place at all costs, as expressed in his agonizing plea, anything to get me to sleep. Later,in the album, the song “High Water” calls back to the apparent act of self-harm when Vessel sings “You are still a perfect reminder of what all these scars on my arms are for”. Across the rest of This place will become your tomb Vessel's emotions are even more vivid, twisted and contradictory than on Sundowning. On “Hypnosis”, Vessel is as love-struck as ever “You know you hypnotize me always”. But his romantic feelings are undercut by a perverse craving for Sleep to “sink your teeth, split my skin, just make me bleed”.

It's from a place of both desire and desperation that Vessel appears to offer Sleep his body for the deity's own gain, possibly even his mind too, since hypnosis might involve some processing another's brain for their own purpose. “Like that” also blurs contrasting sentiments, blending submissive devotion, “fall into your eyes like a grave, burry me to the sound of your name” with frustration at their continual state of war, “talking with razors on your tongue just to provoke my combat”. “Fall for me has” a double meaning of its own when Vessel asks Sleep “Won't you fall for me?” He could either be referring to falling in love or a shared descend to a watery tomb. At the time, Vessel's potent emotions are more straightforward. His mind showcases the strength of his affection for Sleep while the “love you want” sees him desperately trying to keep sleep close when he appears to be straying. For a time, love seems to win out “I'm dying to melt through the heart of her molecules till the particles part like holy water” Vessel sings during the awestruck “Alkaline”,

but the high quickly drops to a low on the next “Distraction” when Vessel once again realizes he's at the point of no return “It's too late for me”. Regarding the depth of his feelings and the hurt such intense devotion can cause by descending Vessel seems to have grown weary of the lack of reciprocity and their relationship “Take it all for nothing”. Again, he sings before aiming a pointed question back at Sleep: “So what would you do for me?” Although “Telomeres” sees the tension cool and desire reclaims center stage, the disorder sets in again by “High Water” as Vessel admits defeat over what appears to be final separation from Sleep.

I will accept that I can't pretend we will ever be together. He concludes and the album finishes with him back in place of emotional devastation and physical injury.

See the title of closing track “Missing Limbs” just like he was in the beginning.

As compelling as the story is that's told on the record, there is a whole other level of the

narrative taking place outside of the song on This place will become your tomb and it's justas intriguing. A significant element of the lore woven into Sleep Token's second LP came in the form of coordinates which fans in the band's Discord and Reddit communities eagerly poured over. A string of numbers on one of the merged designs from the era proved to be coordinates for a whale fall, a seismic oceanic event where a whale carcass falls to the ocean floor and provides nourishment for an entire ecosystem that typically has little to survive on in the dark depths. Additionally, fans with physical copies of the album found a set of numbers on the back of the CD and vinyl editions that reference distance measured in nautical miles. When the nautical miles were converted to letters, they spelled out the phrase Leviatan Sun. In the Bible Leviatan is a sea monster embodying chaos and in Anton LaVey's the Satanic Bible Leviatan represents the element of water.

This place will become your tomb came with even more mysterious numbers. The album's liner notes as well as the artwork for the individual song on YouTube ascribe each track a measurement in meters each larger or deeper than the one before. For example, the measurement of opening track Atlantic is 914meters which fans later discovered was the depth of the first ever Atlantic deep dive. The depth increase and increase until closing track “Missing Limbs” whose corresponding measurements is 10924meters which happens to be the depth of the Mariana Trench, the deepest oceanic trench on earth. It's a lonely place that only five people, half the number of people who've walked on the moon have visited. Speaking of lonely places the artwork for “This Place” there's three singles Alkaline, The Love You Want and Fall For Me which were released in a slower more conventional album rollout than “Sundowning's” tracks contain three additional coordinates between them. Those turned out to be the coordinates of the most remote location on earth point Nemo the furthest spot from any inhabited land mass in any given direction around 1700miles out into the sea. A literal explanation for the inclusion of these Easter eggs would be to pinpoint a possible location where the events of “This Place” narrative play out but it's more likely these numbers and locations serve a poetic purpose. In a whale fall the Leviathan in question has lost its life but its death enables the nourishment of thousands of other life forms. This parallel spells Vessel's relationship with or even function to sleep. Vessel enables Sleep to thrive and continue existing surrendering parts of himself to make this possible.

In addition the whale fall relates to the continued motif of feeding and biting heard throughout Sleep Tokens work. Furthermore it resonates with the themes of obsession, mental illness, self-harm and death in “This Place” twisted love affair as do the two notably isolated locations. Vessel's obsession with Sleep has seemingly brought him to the point of suicidal ideation, a lonely place. Will he sacrifice himself to manipulate to the manipulative deity much like a whale that falls to feed the creatures of the deep? It's no accident that the very first line of the album invokes an image of burial at sea. “Call me when they bury bodies underwater”, the symbolism hardly ends there just as every song on “Sundowning” was given its own visual identity in the form of sigils. Each of “This Place” says songs are represented by a specific sea creature. These have appeared on sleep token merch designs and the feature of some ofthese organisms tie into the themes of the album's narrative. Many of the animals have notable feeding heavens, prominent physical structures related to feeding which echoes the band's preoccupation with biting and consumption. For example the comb jelly that represents “Mine” has five jaws. The black swallower representing “Atlantic” is known for ingesting fish larger than itself, mirroring Vessels call for Sleep to completely consume him, the deep-sea lizard fish that represents “the love you want” will eat anything it meets including members of its own species, a reflection of Sleep's own voracious lawless appetite. Meanwhile the cookie-cutter shark representing “Distraction” is known to migrate vertically coming to the surface at dusk and descending at dawn, an uncanny parallel of the times when Sleep visits vessel is laid out in Sundowning's “the night does not belong to God” - and it feeds by gawking holes out of larger animals. This brutal manner of eating echoes Vessels sense of what sleep does to him: taking without giving, leaving Vessel dislocated in the process. Finally, some of the other organisms are known to live in deeper parts of the ocean, sometimes even corresponding to the deaths indicated by the coordinates each song is labeled with. The Hadal snailfish, for instance, which represents the album's penultimate track “High Water”, is one of the main predators living in the Mariana trench, while the creature corresponding to “Missing Limbs” is the fallen whale itself.

Such heavy themes and multi-layered imagery demand dynamic music to match and This Place more than delivers. Compared to Sleep Token's previous efforts, the individual components of the band's sound are woven tightly together rather than treated as separate parts. Even so, the soft-into-heavy structure that the band favors is just present as on Sundowning, contrasts between the two musical extremes even more stark. “Atlantic” opens as a sweeping piano ballad before racing towards a crescendo as the guitar's thunder in, while Like That vacillates between eerie electronics and crunchy riffs. The guitars are considerably more prominent than on “Sundowning”, lending the album a heavier, grittier tone, yet the album doesn't sacrifice the group's singular genre-fluidity. “The love you want” and “Descending” both return to the softer airier R&B that's threaded throughout This Place's predecessor and record's most adventurous turns arrive during some of its gentlest, most vulnerable tracks. “Missing Limbs” is a sparse, fragile acoustic guitar ode, while “Fall for me” is even starker, sung almost a cappella with the use of a vocoder. All together “This Place” is a more complete and focused record with a greater feeling of cohesion, all without losing a fraction of the band's identity.

This Place dropped at a particularly opportune moment. Shortly before the album's release, in June 2021, Sleep Token played their first post-quarantine life ritual on day one of Download Pilot, a sized down 10 000 capacity version of the iconic British rock and metal festival that was organized as a test event to measure the spread of COVID-19 at live shows. The band played right before the night's hedliners Frank Carter and the Rattlesnakes, a notably high-profile slot for a group with only one album their name and a mighty step-up from where Sleep Token had been before the covid-19 shutdown. Seizing the moments they debuted “Alkaline” and set in motion their next chapter.

Five months later, Sleep Token embarked on their biggest UK tour to date, including a ritual at London's 2000 capacity O2 Shepherd's Bush Empire which was over double the size of the last headliner in the capital. The fervor in the stands particularly fizzed in the air, to the point that fans were moshing while Vessel opened to the show with the somber “Atlantic”, playing piano alone under a spotlight before his masked compatriots emerged. The most significant show of the album cycle however was a much more intimate affair. The band - or rather Vessel joined by three female backing singers - played a one-off “Room Below” ritual at London 600-capacity Lafayette in April 2022, after being delayed twice: once in January due to COVID-19 concerns and again in March due to illness. With just an acoustic guitar and piano Sleep Tokens frontman performed stripped-back takes of songs from across the band's discography including the live debut of Sundownings “Give”, plus covers of Outcasts “Hey Ya!” and Leonard Cohen's “Hallelujah”.

Being a Sleep Token gig, it was never going to be a run-of-the-mill acoustic show. Indeed, it offered an unprecedented glimpse into the mind of the man underneath the cloak and mask. To that end, Vessel did them two things that most fans never imagined he would do. Firstly, he removed his mask playing the piano with it placed to the side - but he still preserved his anonymity by performing his back to the crowd and his hood up. Secondly, he broke his usual rule over speaking between songs - sort of anyway. A speech was played to the crowd with his voice warped and altered beyond recognition, and it was here that the curtain was pulled back as far as the band would allow.

“Some time ago i was given a message,” Vessel said during the speech. “It was a message that originated from one among you. Someone possessed by a strong desire to tell me something. The message went very simply “you saved me”. “I did not save anyone. I do not believe I have the capacity to save anyone. All I have ever given anyone is a small window into the emotional waiting room of my mind. I do so while doing everything in my power to minimize my own vulnerability. In this way I am selfish I choose not to give what others can and yet I am the benefactor of this thankful praise. I experience a great deal of pain in my life. However I do not believe I have suffered as you have suffered. Perhaps that is another reason why we are all here. At the very least we have all suffered.” He continued : “I am nothing without this music. I am nothing without this mask. So, in this sense, the message I received was true but only in an inverse sense. The truth is I did not save anybody. You saved me."

#sleep token #sleep token worship #sleep token revolver #sleep token lyrics

[blueathens]

Dear Princess - Agape Series

         ACT TWO, SCENE TWO

Song: Can You Hold Me by NF Quote: Bobby wished he knew what was going on in her head, but just like everyone else, he knew he wasn't as strong as Kasey.

A/N: Not read through, or edited. A/N 2: This piece has been in my drafts for a while, so I think it was a little rushed, but it's more of a filler chapter in a way

Previous || Next

Masterlist//Main Masterlist//Agape Masterlist  

Dear Princess,

I miss you, but you scared me the last time we saw one another. You scared me. Your eyes scared me because I saw the pain I caused you. You became a ghost, you become something of my own imagination. Kasey, princess, you already were dead before I did anything to you that night, I was just helping to remove all that pain you carried.

But I also helped to just simply get rid of you because you may be too good for me, but that doesn't mean someone else can have you. You're still mine. Always will be mine.

I own you now princess.

You won't know it yet, but I'm apart of you now princess – every thought, every word, everything you do will be because of me – I've broken your little mind and I now control it.

And trust me, whatever I do, won't be pretty.

You'll never going to be able to get rid of me Kasey, I'm always going to be here, always going to be lurking in the shadows, always knowing everything you're doing. But I need you to know that everything I do, everything I've done, is out of love. Kasey I love you and I will never not love you

Love from the guy who will love you the most,

Jordan

Kasey didn't know how long she was sat in her car for, she didn't know even know how long she was staring at that letter for. But she realised she missed Christmas when a message came through her phone, making it ring and vibrate on the seat next to her.

She reaches over, seeing the time was 10am, and below the time was many notifications, but the one on the top was the one that pulled her out from her thoughts.

Owen: Just wanted to tell you that I've finished my last round of immunotherapy and that my blood work and pulmonary function tests looks good. My tumour has been reduced by 73% too. Hope you had an amazing Christmas and hope I see you again soon x

Kasey sniffles, throwing her phone back to the seat and threw her head back onto the pillow, eyes squeezing shut as her hands crumbled up the letter and threw that somewhere in her car. And with a little tired sob, her hands moved to press against her eyes as she tried to mentally prepare herself for work in half an hour.

❥๑━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━๑❥

"9-1-1, what's your emergency?"

"Sh-shark! Shark! A man's been attacked by a shark!"

"What beach are you on ma'am?"

"We're not on the beach! We're on the freeway!"

"LAFD. Make room!" Bobby yelled as him and his team walked through the makeshift path that the crowd of people have created.

"What the hell," both Buck and Kasey said, jaw's dropping at the sight of a shark gripping onto a man's arm. A few people were around the shark, trying to tug it off the man, but none of their efforts were doing anything for the man with the shark eating his arm.

"Tiger shark." A woman claimed with struggle. "We were transporting her for release into the wild. Truck jackknifed."

"Jaws!" Bobby yelled.

"Wrong type of shark, Cap." Kasey turned to look at him. "Jaws was a Great-White–" she trails off once she noticed the look of disbelief on her Captain's face. "Oh...right...right...get those Jaws...not –Jaws! Someone get this man some Jaws!" Kasey span on her heel to look at some of the 118 that stood behind her.

"I'm on it!" Eddie calls, running back to the fire truck to grab the piece of equipment the crew needed.

Kasey span around to look at the man who was in agony.

"Hey, at least you'll get a cool scar from this."

"Or no arm." Buck muttered as he made his way round to stand by Kasey's side, who gave him a quick glare.

"Or an arm with a cool scar."

"Are you sure you two are professionals?" The woman asked them through gritted teeth and the two younger firefighter looked down at the ground, lips pursed as they awaited their next instructions.

"How'd his arm get in there?" Chimney questioned, chewing on his gum as he hovered over the shark.

The man grunts and yells in pain. Kasey looks up from the ground and back at the incident at hand. "A really, really cool scar," she mumbles to herself.

"Diego was trying to get what water was left in our pump system. She can't breathe without it!" The man with the 'California Marine Life Centre' jacket told him, directing his eyesight to Diego – the man who had a shark attached to his arm – and Chimney who was just simply watching the sight.

"How much time does she have left?" Hen asked in concern.

"Minutes." The woman told her.

"Uh, do we wait that long or, just, you know..." Buck asked, raising the mechanic jaws up before being pushed back slightly by Bobby.

"No, no, don't kill her! She's come so far!" Diego grunted.

"All right, guys, we're gonna do this really carefully." Bobby told the crew. "All right, come on. Let's get in there."

"Can't we just put her to sleep for a little bit, then gently guide her grip off from Diego?" Kasey questioned Hen who began to shake her head.

"It's too risky." Was all Hen said, and Kasey took a step back to give the rest of her team room to use the Jaws. She felt helpless right now, but there wasn't much else she could do. If she even tried to stand nearer the group that kneeled by the shark, then she would just be in the way and could risk the whole plan.

So, she just stood a few steps back, her thumb and finger were pinching the bottom of her lip as she listened to Diego cries of agony gets mixed in with the sound of the Jaws. And ever so slowly, she watched the bloody arm that belonged to Diego get pulled out. It was covered in numerous bite marks, but Kasey knew that Diego would be happy that the shark and his arm would all be okay eventually.

And within a second of Bobby's next instruction, Kasey watched Chimney and a few others helped to lie Diego down on the stretcher. Kasey stared at the arm with wide eyes, and her fingers began to pinch her bottom lip more, and she wouldn't have cared or even noticed if it began to bleed, because the sight in front of her made her sick to the stomach – she heard incidents of stories of sharks, but she never knew she would see one of those stories right in front of her due to how rare they were – but here she was, watching a man who would rather live with one arm than let a shark die.

"Don't let her die," Diego begs. "Please."

Kasey turns around to face the fire truck, eyes narrowing at the sight where the hose was, and with a shake of her head she rushed off to grab the hose and dragged it all the way to where Bobby stood by the shark.

She wasn't going to let this shark die – Diego didn't want that – he didn't risk his entire arm for nothing.

And on a much softer setting that was similar to the pouring of a bucket, she sprayed the shark, keeping it hydrated with water whilst Bobby watched her. He watched her keep the shark alive, and he knew he had to help the shark in some other way too.

So with another order, a firefighter climbed in front of the steering wheel of the truck, whilst the other members of the team very gently bust speedily placed a harshness round the shark, and at the all clear, Kasey stopped her spraying and was replaced with the blue jacket man with his bucket. She hurriedly put the rope back before jumping into the truck, followed by Buck.

They drove off with the shark harnessed in front of them, and the crowd of people cheering them on the side.

And they drove towards the body of water they needed to be at, lowering the shark down quick into it, and everyone watched as the shark swam out of it harness and out to sea.

❥๑━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━๑❥

"Kasey?" Bobby calls as he notices the youngest firefighter sitting on the bed she would sleep in if she ever did a full day shift. Her knees were pulled towards her chest, chin resting on top of it as she just sat in the dark. "Kasey? You're not on a full shift tonight."

"It's better than sleeping in my car again," Kasey mutters, not making one look at Bobby.

"You've been living in your car?" Bobby questioned, slowly making his way towards the girl. "Were you kicked out of your old place? Because if it's a place you needed, you know you're always welcomed–"

"No." Kasey utters, clearing her throat as she shakes her head. Her fingers moved to play with the end of her trousers. "I just can't go back there. I tried to, but every time I do, I end up in the shower, trying to wash off the blood that's not even there. Trying to wash off the feeling of him. I can't remember when I last slept either, cause that night still haunts me, no matter how many times I try to push it out of my mind; the thoughts, the sound, him, Bear...the pain....the smell...the blood... it all so haunts me."

Kasey brings her knees in closer for Bobby to sit down.

"Where is Bear now?"

"With Buck...He thinks I just wants a deeper clean of my house...which I do, but no matter how much I clean it, it still feels like it did on that night."

"Kasey," Bobby reaches forward to rub her knee.

"I'm just so terrified, Bobby. I'm always terrified. I act like I'm fine, but...but I'm scared. He knows everything, a-and that is so fucking scary." She rubs her palm over her eye as she begins to sob, and Bobby reached forwards to bring her into his arms, as if it he was creating a shield to protect her from everything. "Could you just take this pain away? It hurts, so much...help me." Her voice was so weak, so vulnerable.

Bobby was terrified too as he doesn't recall a time he has ever seen Kasey like this – she has always seemed as tough as a wall of bricks, that nothing could hurt her, but here she was, remembering that she was human and began to broke down in a man who she saw as a father.

Kasey was clutching Bobby's shoulder so hard, nails gripping in, palms steadily pushing against the clavicle, and Bobby began to wonder if it was possible for a human to break bones with their bare hands, if it was humanly possible that if they pushed hard enough his bones would snap.

Bobby didn't care though, he didn't care how many bones she may break of his, he didn't mind at all as she was the girl that he thought of as a daughter and she was crying, more like sobbing. She wouldn't stop.

Bobby believed that if she was sat in a hole in the ground then she be overflowing it by now. Her crying was deadly to hear, one of those cries that rips a heart out of one's chest, she cried as if she was in pain, and she was. She's always been in pain, suffering in the silence and this is one of the times where the bottle of emotions spilled within her, unleashing all these emotions she's been hiding from everyone.

It scared Bobby, it scared him as he has never seen Kasey like this, and he had no clue how to help her. But it was the silence that followed that scared him the most, just them two sitting in that room for three hours straight in pure silence. Bobby wished he knew what was going on in her head, but just like everyone else, he knew he wasn't as strong as Kasey.

#Eddie Diaz #eddie diaz x reader #eddie diaz imagine #eddie diaz imagines #eddie diaz fanfics #eddie diaz fanfiction #eddie diaz fics #eddie diaz one shot #eddie diaz x y/n #eddie diaz x kasey strand #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley imagines #evan buckley #evan buckley imagine #911 #9-1-1 #9-1-1 show #9-1-1 lone star #9-1-1 imagine #911 imagine #911 imagines #9-1-1 imagines #ryan guzman #oliver stark #blueathensfics

[amongthesharks]

Five times he heard a lullaby, and one time he sang it

AO3 Link

Words:7,368

Summary:

"Zephyr collapsed in front of the grave, and it looked as if the weight of everyone’s hopes and sorrows laid across her as well. Was it possible for her to look smaller and more frail? Her hands touched the dirt mound of the grave and a choked out sob was pulled from the tieflings core. It took Astarion aback, watching someone mourn over a grave. Had anyone mourned over his? He listened to the feral sounds of grief and he finally realized, once again, he was watching something he shouldn’t. {...} She had laid down now, alongside the grave, her arm flopped over it as if she was cuddling with it, holding it, bringing the dead six feet under some comfort. Now his own conflict flitted in his chest, some anger with the need to confront her, some concern but mostly the need to leave. Why did no one, in his 200 years of death, mourn for him like this. Did they? He wouldn’t know, and neither would this boy. It was a waste of energy and emotion. “...I'll stay here through the darkest night All the way, I will fight…” "

Notes:

I’ve not done Astarion’s origin run, this is just me writing to write from his perspective. I wrote this just today. I have no beta-reader, I just hope I have good proof reading. I've got a small list of songs that If I were any good with video editing I'd make into little videos, but instead I'm gonna make song fics. This is based of Rider's Lullaby. I've put them into a spotify playlist for those curious: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2bx33NULJdAzisQ1PSabkM?si=d7988b8c48344621

There was a ringing in his ears, and disaster all around him. Flames and smoke choked out the sun. The SUN. How long had it been since he had felt the sun, seen the world in its waking hour. How was he not dead? Astarion stared up into the sky afraid to move, incase he’d burst into ashes, or he’d wake up from what clearly had to be a dream of sorts. How could it not be? He’s seen daylight, truly, in over 200 years, unless it was being used as punishment. But he wasn’t in that castle. He wasn’t in the cold, damp cells that Cazador kept. He was out, he was free. It was terrifying. Slowly he made the motion to stand, he felt fine, sore, but fine. He stared at his hands a long while to make sure he really wasn’t going to burst into fire himself, then he ran. Ran as far from the wreckage of the Nautiloid as he could, he didn’t want to be near that ship and its tentacled occupants any longer than necessary. 

He reached a cliff's edge and sucked in a breath, the ship’s parts had been strewn far from the main wreckage, and the bodies… The smell of blood normally would be enticing but his panic and confusion was overriding that, along with the smell of burning flesh and hair. He dropped to his knees and looked out onto the water just past the shore below him. That’s when he heard it the first time. A song drifting up from the shore below. A blueish waif of a tiefling woman sat beside a crumpled body of a young boy, she stroked his hair and was singing a wordless lullaby. They both looked worse for wear, he noted, in fact he was certain the boy was dying and the girl, she may be crying. She dipped down her head, the curl of her ram like horns were careful around the boy’s face. He could hear words now.

“You’re okay,

You’re alright

I'll never, ever leave your side…”

The tune was slow, if it weren’t for the faint melody to her voice, he’d think she was just speaking them, like a prayer or a poem. Her hand cupped the boy’s cheek. He was young, but not a child, his skin similar to hers, but looking more ashen, horns not fully grown in, and he noticed now how much blood was pooling beneath them. Astarion watched the girl for a moment longer before pulling himself away. He wasn’t normally the caring sort, but he was currently out of sorts. So the vampire spawn moved on, to the side of a road, or what was left of one, to make a plan. It was only once he started thinking that he realized there was something familiar about the tiefling… it was that he had seen her, running through the ship, past his pod with the boy in tow. They hadn’t even casted him a passing glance, he probably wouldn’t have either if the positions were flipped. 

Later he’d have her under dagger point, followed by two others. She looked just as soft now as she did then. When the tadpoles connected their minds he saw the moments before the girl and her brother were taken into the Nautiloid, and how she managed to break out and stop the tadpole process on the boy. Not knowing that no matter if she had saved him or not, the boy was slated to die.

Once Astarion disentangled himself from her, a long stare was shared between, one of sudden knowing of something each shouldn’t have seen. Her name was Zephyr, or that’s the name she gave, and despite it all, she welcomed the elf into the ragtag band of survivors; the boy not among them. Did the others know that she had just lost family…. Did the others know that she was grieving…

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The days moved fast, their party was growing by leaps and bounds and was, in his opinion, an unbearable group to travel with. One ornery Gith, a retriever energy devil, a know it all wizard, white knight warlock of all things, a religious zealot, the man with the best hair in camp and her. A sorceress, but by no means the look of one. She’s kept almost all information about herself to herself, even when around other tieflings, she seemed guarded. In fact, she seemed tired. People saw her and immediately saw a mark. Someone who would help them, no matter what it was. Zephyr seemed easy to manipulate in that way. Even at camp, she’s kept busy, she’s checked in with everyone, had extensive conversations with Gale and Laezel about what could be done about the tadpoles and the direction they should go in and has spent the nights mostly sleepless. 

Well so had he, but that was normal for him and why he noticed the way she sat tending to the flames, ushering others to take extra rest, she’d keep extra watch. She was writing, always writing, always planning.  Astarion knew there’d be a time she’d break, and maybe that would be his time to do what he did best, use what he knew and had, for his own type of protection.

It wasn’t long, the next night or so when it all caught up to her. Astarion had walked out of his tent and saw Zephyr was wandering out of camp, in the dark. Her skin and hair, the blue and purple of night, she almost blended in with the surrounding camp. Karlach was on watch, how did she not see her leave? The rogue did what rogues do, he snuck out himself, and carefully, quietly, followed the tiefling out from camp. Had she done this before and did he not notice? Her steps were confident, and knowingly placed as she wandered back through roads they’d traveled before, and into the woods again before finding a clearing on a cliff side. Oddly familiar was the view, though the spot chosen was different. Where the wreckage of the ship was scorched and blackened, this spot was full of life. And in the middle of it all was a grave maker.

Zephyr collapsed in front of it, and it looked as if the weight of everyone’s hopes and sorrows laid across her as well. Was it possible for her to look smaller and more frail? Her hands touched the dirt mound of the grave and a choked out sob was pulled from the tieflings core. It took Astarion aback, watching someone mourn over a grave. Had anyone mourned over his? He listened to the feral sounds of grief and he finally realized, once again, he was watching something he shouldn’t. He began to step away as her cries subsided, but something made him stop. She was singing again. Zephyr was no bard, her voice would win her no awards or win her any contests. But the sound of it was like that of a mother’s. One that, even if a note was pitchy, or the tune not right, it would bring comfort to most. It was the same one he had heard on their first day. This one was choppier, accented with grief and sobs, but he stayed to listen. He looked over his shoulder to bear witness. She had laid down now, alongside the grave, her arm flopped over it as if she was cuddling with it, holding it, bringing the dead six feet under some comfort. 

Now his own conflict flitted in his chest, some anger with the need to confront her, some concern but mostly the need to leave. Why did no one, in his 200 years of death, mourn for him like this. Did they? He wouldn’t know, and neither would this boy. It was a waste of energy and emotion. 

“...I'll stay here through the darkest night

All the way, I will fight…”

Through the darkest night. He shook the thoughts from his head and left, having no care about how loud he was in the process. Maybe he wanted her to hear, to know she was known, to know someone was there… or just to startle her from her own misery. 

Back at camp, he leaned against his tent post reading, his turn for watch. He watched as the tiefling snuck back into camp, dirty and tear stained. For a moment their eyes met. His red ones with her red rimmed ones, there was hesitation, an excuse on her lips, something she felt she needed to say but before she could Astarion cut her off.

“You need to sleep. You’re no good to any if you can’t even cast a spell from exhaustion.” He made his voice snippy, uncaring, as he looked back to the fire. “Karlach made tea, you should take some so it doesn’t go to waste…. It’ll help…” His voice began to soften, and when it did he stopped and looked out to the woods. Karlach never made tea, leaf water wasn’t something in her repertoire of things. But maybe Zephyr didn’t know that. Either way, like a wounded animal, she slowly took some tea and then scurried away. Once she was out of view he cursed and pushed his hand through his hair. He then snapped his book closed and tossed it onto the table and sat himself right down on the rugs in front of his tent and brooded. The damn girl hadn’t had a moment to grieve, but it made him unquestionably angry. Not for her but at her, at her feelings, at her actions and at the actions imposed on her. Maybe once they do these heroics the group suddenly was about, he could convince them to fast track the real problem, and get out of here. He didn’t need to be going soft himself.

—-----------------------------------------------------

Zephyr was utterly a conundrum. When he found himself starving, she didn’t deny him, she didn’t even bat an eye at helping him. But when he propositioned her later, to seal the deal on gaining her as an asset, she said no. She. Said. No. He had worked all his charms and wiles, tried to frame it as a gift, a favor, and she said no. In fact, she had turned down just about everyone. And it wasn’t the coy, playing hard to get, come chase me type of turn down, just a general thank you, but no thank you, in her gentle tones. Yet, it wasn’t as though she didn’t still care about the group she inherited. Her exact words to him were “Astarion… I… no.” Which of course sounded rude and then her face broke into what could only be confusion. “Sorry, it’s not you, I just… don’t… we hardly know each other… and it’s hardly the time.”

She didn’t imbibe at the party, and it took a lot of coaxing to get her to at least frolic. People were looking to her to spread hope and the sorceress just seemed disconnected. Now, were she not the hero of this little adventure, Astarion would have just written it off as nerves for the upcoming travel but she had to know how to put on a mask. To give the people what was needed. He’d SEEN her do it before. He noted what finally got her to get up and try to enjoy the party were the damn kids. Mol, Mattis, and the whole crew had seemed to lift her spirits enough to get her to do something, anything, and for the first time since he’s met her, she smiled. He’d take a stab that it was even genuine. 

It would make any heart skip a beat, alive or undead. 

Finally, people had made it to their own tent or found a place to curl up at the end of the party. Few were left awake. Astarion watched Zephyr talk to Zevlor at the dimming campfire, with one of the tiefling children asleep in her lap. Their heads bent as they discussed what the tieflings were going to do next in their steps to Baldur’s Gate. Snippets of conversation made it his way.

“...the mountain pass may be hard for the whole group…”

“Do you risk the underdark instead?”

“...none compare to the dangers near Moonrise…”

“...the children’s safety…”

“...I’ll protect them, on my honor.”

Their voices petered out and Astarion watched, spurned from night time company, as Zephyr sat, with Mol sleeping in her lap and watched the fire. Blue fingers moving through black hair that had been loosened from its ties. There was an odd moment of jealousy, that he let sit in his chest as he turned into his tent.

Now, he watched Zephyr slither and sneak and fight in a way she never had as they infiltrated the prisons. The moment she noticed one of the children were missing she was on a hellbent mission to bring them back. Nothing could dissuade her to wait, to plan, there was both fire and fear in her gaze as she told them she was going, and either they could join her or not. It was Astarion who came to her side first, then the ever protective Karlach, but there was hesitance in the others. Zephyr didn’t wait for them to decide further and left, finally with Shadowheart jogging to catch up. 

When she fought with all her being, the sorceress was a sight to behold. A fount of power overflowing with rage and purpose. Astarion had convinced her to go in quiet but the moment the mantle fell and suspicion arose, the tiefling unleashed herself upon the unsuspecting jailors. No one was able to raise the alarm. Between the four of them, they were too quick and deadly. Finally, the dust had settled, and bodies laid around them. It took a few beats for her to surface from her battle induced stupor. She ran to the cells, calling one name; Mol. Unlocking cells magically without a second thought, freeing anyone residing inside, but her eyes only searched for one. Finally, in the last cell, carefully hidden, she saw them, curled in on themselves and smaller than any of them had seen the small spunky tiefling before. Zephyr ran to them, scooping up the child and pressing them into the safety of her embrace. 

Astarion would have thought that the future leader of an underground operation would have been quick to bounce back, but in that moment he was reminded that she was a little girl. Mol seemed to sag into the other tiefling’s touch and cried. Just a child. Astarion’s face twisted, hadn’t he lured his own number of children to their doom, to be spawn for Cazador or worse. Was he no better? Ruckus started up again as the gnomes and tieflings began to break through the wall and make their escape. His own past came up to haunt him in the din of the clatter, a darkness trying to shadow his mind. But above it all a voice rose, only in his own ears. She was singing again. Surely comforting the child, not comforting him. But he couldn’t help but look.

Zephyr had Mol tucked into her fiercely, Mol's face was pressed into her shoulder. The words he’s already memorized slip through her lips. He says them with her under his breath. “You’re okay. You’re alright. I'll never, ever leave your side…” He shakes his head and clears it a moment before involuntarily moving towards them. The vampire spawn crouched by them and caught Zeyphr’s gaze. He could see now, how her eyes had the same icey blue, but one was rimmed in a dark circle, how oddly beautiful. He caught himself and nodded toward the hole in the wall. “Let’s go. Before more trouble befalls us.” He stood back up and offered his hand. She, surprising him, took it, hauling herself up with Mol still clinging on. 

“Yes… yes of course.” She said, softly, the fight and fury that had wholly consumed her not but minutes before seemed to have left her suddenly. She adjusted Mol onto her hip, she’s done this before, worked with children…. Of course she has, you saw her bury her own brother. Astarion ushered her to the hole in the wall, where the rest of them waited. They followed the rescued prisoners to a boat where they all made their escape. Zephyr never let Mol go the whole trip, but she hummed, while the girl finally fell asleep in her arms, that same lullaby. Astarion found himself murmuring the words to himself as they drifted into the cursed lands again to seek shelter at the Little Light. It made him feel sick, or maybe it wasn’t sickness, but a weird warmth. He and the sorceress had had their discussion, he mostly did a lot of the talking, about his past, and Cazador. She seemed to take it all in stride, and surprisingly had called him a friend. He didn’t have friends, oiror so he had thought. She hadn’t given any information about her past outside of what he had seen and discovered on his own.

He looked up to find her watching him. He looked behind himself a moment, making sure her gaze hadn’t settled on someone else, but it was true. She was watching him. Her humming had stopped and she seemed to have that furrowed brow of confusion. The dark markings on her forehead moved with her concentration. She seemed to mouth something to him, and it caught him off guard. 

Are you okay?

Astarion blinked and gave just a short curt nod before he looked away, swallowing hard. Concern, she showed concern… to him. For all intents and purposes, he should look fine. Nothing here had rattled him or not lastingly, he hadn't dropped his guard… or had he. His sanguine gaze slid back in her direction where she still watched him. 

Once everyone had settled at the inn, and Mol reunited with her friends, acting with all the bluster that she had before, Zephyr found her way to Astarion. The spawn has occupied an empty balcony with a bottle of the best wine he could find. He was already half way deep in it staring out into the darkness when she stepped over the threshold. Astarion didn’t move, maybe he’d be invisible, and she’d leave. He was a bit drunk, or more, to say the least. Maybe his darker thoughts were catching up to him after all. The brush of her side against his sleeve is what he noticed first, he could feel the warmth coming off her that made the headiness of the alcohol even heavier. Then came the touch, a hand placed on his wrist gently. It jolted him, and in that moment of confusion, he looked at her. Her hand gave a small squeeze.

“Thank you… for everything today. I know it could have been a suicidal mission….” She trailed off her hand beginning to slide from him. Astarion found himself reaching out and stopping her, his hand on hers a moment. She hesitated before continuing. “I know children are not your strong suit… nor is playing knight in shining armor…” Zephyr looked away. “Not my strong suit either but… I couldn’t…” Silence grew between them with the unfinished sentence. Maybe it didn’t need to be finished. He wondered if she would continue… Is this when he should be saying anything? Instead she just pressed her forehead to his shoulder a moment and sighed. “Just… thank you…”   He cleared his throat a moment and nodded, not sure if he should trust his voice. His lips twitched in the smallest of smiles before it faded.

“Of course… anything for a bit of carnage.” He said, though it lacked his usual bite. Why was she being so gentle… Why was she getting close, no, he was leaning down, hovering just over her own, but she was face first in his sleeve, could she see him, was she aware.

“You don’t mean that.” Zephyr looked up, and seemed to stiffen a small moment when she noticed how close his face was to hers. He began to move away, as he turned his head, she leaned up into him and placed a whisper of a kiss to his cheek. Before he could react, she was gone, the warmth of her fading away with his absence. 

Astarion was dumbfounded. He dropped into a balcony chair and let his hand touch where her fingers had been before, in a sudden flare of anger and gritted his teeth and chucked the wine bottle out into the darkness, for the shadows to claim.

—--------------------------------------------------------------------

Baldur’s Gate. His city. His city. He hadn't seen it in daylight in centuries, he would have been happier to be home and showing off the place, if it hadn’t become the fallout of disaster. Refugee camps littered the area just outside the gates, and word was things weren’t much better inside. The problems pulled Zephyr’s attention in every which way, and what was worse was the infiltration of a shapeshifter. For a man with trust issues, it didn’t bode well for Astarion.

“Let’s just get into the lower city. You promised to help me kill…” He didn’t say the man’s name but his jaw clenched anyway. Zephyr looked at him, overwhelmed herself, she sighed and looked at the group.

“There’s so much to do… I know… I think we need a place to settle, a room in the city, not a camp on the outskirts.” The tiefling said as she looked at the Steel Watch guarding the gates. “But we’ll need an alternate route.” It took most of the day, some sleuthing, some parkour and persuading but they finally made it to Elfsong and got the top floor to themselves. Each their own space, and more. Not quite private rooms, but private enough. Safe enough they hoped too. But they were wrong. 

They were easily found by Astarion’s kin, and it made his blood boil, but he fell into his easy canter. They talked of the ascension, about freedom, about the lies of Cazador and his plans to take that from him. But it did no good, they had been willed to fight them and bring him in. That cinched a measure of panic inside of his heart. Had he made it all this way just to fail? Just to be reclaimed and killed? 

It was Zephyr, of all people, who made the first strike when it seemed that talks were going sour. She had stepped in front of him. He couldn’t believe it himself, he seemed struck by the action of it. The tiefling made herself a small and fearsome foe, before unleashing her spells onto the vampire spawn that invaded their space uninvited. This was different from the fury at moonrise. That was caused by fear. This was anger, and on his behalf.

They spawn fled, of course they did. The few who didn’t were ashes on the ground. Blood, rancid and dark, laid far and wide over the room, but most of it wasn’t theirs. However, it did make it no longer a spot to rest for the night. Atleast, this night until the clean up was done. Zephyr was the one to go talk to the innkeeper, to apologize and use money from the collective to pay for cleaning and maintenance. Astarion was still standing in the middle of the blood bath when she returned. 

“They’ll be giving us temporary space in a nearby inn, we’ll actually have our own rooms, kinda. It’ll be for one night, but we might be bunking up.” She announced with a weary smile. “Nothing new honestly, right? Let's just grab…hmm… some random necessities and hop down the road some.” She was trying to sound perky, but she seemed a bit deflated. No one liked having to pick up their things right after setting them down.

It wasn’t a long walk. They even took the chance for a quick wash at the bath house, but the whole trip was hazey for Astarion. Upon arrival to their temporary quarters, people paired or trioed off in their own natural way. Halsin with Jaheria, Karlach, Shadowhart and Laezel, Gale with Wyll. That left Astarion and Zephyr, whether or not it was intentional wasn’t certain, but it was a problem for another night. The tiefling didn’t seem to mind, opening the door to their two twin-bed room. 

“I can find other accommodations.” Astarion started, but the completely over it look she gave him had him slowly crossing the threshold to her. The door closed behind them. He felt nervous, was that right? Had they not all shared the same space out under the sky at camp. Something about this felt different, but if it wasn’t phasing his roommate for the night, he’d try to let it go. “So, you got to meet my family...” He started, trying to make light of the situation as he settled onto the edge of one of the beds.

“They’re not family.” She said, not a question, but a reminder. Zephyr was facing her bed, her back to him. There was a bite to the statement. “Or… well.. Sorry it’s not my place. They are under the whims of another…” He could see the line of tension settle into her shoulders, her hair was longer than when they started, he noted. It hung past her waist now, one long swath of dark navy with hints of lighter blues. She pulled back the covers of her bed and slid into it. “Please rest, Astarion. To the best of your ability.” Her back was to him, and she suddenly seemed so far from him, mentally, emotionally, physically. Where was the sorceress who stood between him and those who wanted to take him away. Where was the fury of anger and magic in the small petite package that was Zephyr?

“Good night.” He said quietly as he laid down on top of his sheets and stared up at the ceiling. In the quiet, his mind began to jog, the trot, and race. What kind of dangers were they all in if Cazador knew where he was, and what he was here to do. He had gloated about his plan like an over confident villain. Zephyr and Astarion had talked about his plan. He wanted to take over the ascension and she both in words and actions was showing him that stopping it might be the better option. But did they just jeopardize that? He didn’t know when he finally fell into his trance, but a familiar face waited for him on the other side.

It was a scene he’s had before. A dark forest, cold and uninviting. He was alone, but he knew he wouldn’t be soon. Cazador’s voice slid under his skin. First, thou shalt not drink of the blood of thinking creatures. He tried to run, but the man appeared before him stopping his escape. Second, thou shalt obey me in all things. The man gripped his spawn’s arms in a vice-like fist, Astarion tried to escape, but his tormentor grew in size, or maybe he was shrinking. Third, thou shalt not leave my side unless directed.

“No… let me go. I’m free.” He said, his voice small and far and scared. “Leave me alone…” Fourth, thou shalt know that thou art mine. “No…” You are mine forever… Astarion tried to fight it, but it landed him nothing but blow, after blow after blow. He cried out, but there was no help to be found in the forest of his mind. His skin split, his bone broke and he found himself smaller and smaller, colder than ever before. Blood ran from a gash in his head and down over an eye, coloring his world red.

Then something in the nightmare changed. He knew every inch of this dream, every touch, every sound, and no matter how he fought it always ended the same. Except this. There was a hand, holding his hand. He could feel it. There was a touch brushing his forehead, it was a balm to the pain. Then he heard his name, soothing and quiet and his eyes shot open. He was gasping for air, like a drowning man, as he stared wildly at the plaster ceiling above him, throat felt hot and tight and his eyes burned as he tried to fight battles that followed him from his trance. Then suddenly there were arms around him. It caused him more panic until he felt how slight they were. He could finally hear her voice.

“Astarion… Astarion....” It lulled him, trying to bring him back down, his panicked eyes looked toward its source and what he found were the ice blue pools of her worried gaze, her blue skinned arms around him in an act of protection and comfort. “I’m right here.” He nodded a few times before a keening sound escaped his chest. He curled into her and his arms found their way around her waist and suddenly he was holding onto her for dear life. She was suddenly his anchor to the current moment. He pressed his face into her neck and choked back a sob.

Her fingers rubbed along his back, one hand moving up to rub at the base of his neck. “You’re okay.” She said and closed her eyes, his lips moved against her skin, he was saying something but her neck caught all the sound. “Hmm?”

“Song.” He managed, embarrassed, tired, drained. “Please…” he rasped. Zephyr’s fingers stilled for a moment. Astarion felt wretched, who was he to ask for a child’s song. A scrap more of comfort, more than he deserved for putting them all in danger. His mind began to spiral again. Pathetic. Useless. Insignificant. Alon- Fingers moved through his hair, a gentle combing, his eyes fluttered and his breath hitched. Her voice was small, almost nervous sounding, but soothing still. He felt her voice vibrate through her body, even as quiet as it was.

“You're okay

You're alright

I'll never, ever leave your side

I will stay and I will fight

With you”

Her lips found his temple, he just about cried. Every movement was gentle, every movement about nothing but comfort. He tried to imagine, just for a moment, being small, but in the way a child was, in the arms of someone more encompassing. He imagined blue fingers in white hair, curls catching on her pinky as if lifted and went back in for another comb through.

“You're okay

You're alright

I'll stay here through the darkest night

All the way, I will fight

With you”

She hummed for a while longer, their bodies melting into a lying position, he curled into her, clinging to her, even as exhaustion took him back over. Zephyr lay back, brushing over his hair and closing her eyes. She repeated the song one more time as he settled into a semblance of calm. 

“Thank you” He whispered as he nuzzled her, trying to soak in all the softness she had for him. Zephyr sighed softly and let her hand settle between his shoulders, her thumb making small circles on his back.

“Astarion… I mean it.” She said to him, as she closed her eyes. “I'll stay here through the darkest night…All the way, I will fight…” The words began to peter out as exhaustion finally claimed her. In the quiet of the room he listened to hear heart beat slow and finished the song.

“With you…”

—-----------------------------

“Help me….please.” Astarion looked at her, and the group, begging for their help. The power he needed to be truly free was right in his grasp. He just needed their help. Her help. He looked at her, wild eyed, holding a dagger over the weakened body of his former master. “Zephyr-”

“No.”  It was a complete sentence. No…His face crumpled. “No, I can’t. Astarion, what about the children… the innocents. They’ll be consumed.” She moves toward him, no one else does. No one dares to. 

“What about me?” He said brokenly. “What about my freedom?” Cazador was chuckling and Astarion was glowering at him before looking at her one more time. “Zephyr….please.” It was one last desperate try and she shook her head. 

“You’re better than that, better than him, better than taking seven thousand lives, Astarion.” He stared at her a long while, white knuckling the dagger in his hand before cursing. He turned to Cazador, and for once he might have seen a glint of fear in the man’s eyes. The first stab surprised him, mostly because he wasn’t sure it would happen, then it happened again and again and again. Frenzy took over his motions as the dagger pierce through the vampire over and over, becoming slick with blood. It began to slip from his hand, but he caught it, shoving Cazador over and continuing. He needed to make sure this man was dead. That he wouldn’t come back. That he could sleep safely, live safely, take revenge for the life stolen from him and that Astarion was forced to steal from others, and for the power he was leaving on the table. 

He screamed and slammed the dagger down one last time, the sound crunchy and wet. The smell was abysmal. Then he fell onto his knees. It was over. That was it. No power for anyone. Everyone for themselves. Something dislodged in him, broke him and he sat back on his heels and tiled his face toward the sky and cried. It sounded torn from him and swallowed in the cavern. In this moment, he felt more alone than ever.

Then, she was in front of him, kneeling, pulling his limp crying body into her as she held him fiercely. He wanted to fight it, fight the comfort, fight the touch, fight the tenderness in the movement of her being, until he noticed his cries were no longer alone. She was crying with him. She was saying something, and he had to strain to hear it. She felt her lips in his blood stained hair, the thrum of her voice in her chest, and the same comforting tune, just for him, without request. Karlach and Gale were dealing with the spawn, Gale had taken control of the staff for the moment, releasing the captives, and giving them instruction into the Under Dark.

There was nothing more he needed to do, he felt her sway slightly, back and forth and then his arms that had remained limp at his side finally crashed around her. Pulling himself as tight as he could into her form, sobbing into her clothes. 

“I'll stay here through the darkest night

All the way, I will fight

With you”

He felt his world darkening. The fight, emotionally and physically taking their toll. He felt the flutter of gentle kisses against his face, to his forehead, over his eyes, to his cheek. She pressed her forehead to his. He knew now that this was a moment of endearment. Then, he blacked out in her arms.

Astarion floated in darkness, not senses touched him. Utterly detached.

When he opened his eyes next, he was in a clean room, he was clean, he could smell no trace of blood, or rot, or damp. The world above him was wood slats of ceiling, and next to him kneeling on the floor, head resting on the side of the bed, with his hand in hers, was Zephyr. She was sleeping. He realized it hurt to move, just the general pain that comes from the fallout of so many things. But he wiggled his fingers in hers and freed his thumb. Tentatively it swiped along her jaw, missing the cheek he was aiming for. 

“Zeph-” His voice choked off her name. It was searing and raw. He tried again. “Zephyr…” He managed. He watched her eyes flutter and open slowly. They looked up at him, the barest moment of confusion before she smiled. His heart would stop again if it could. She winced as she got up from the ground. ‘Ah… wait.” He tried to stop her but he lightly tapped his hand away. The tiefling climbed over him and laid on his other side, her back against the wall and leaned up over him some.

Her eyes took in his features. He had to wonder what she saw there now. Before he could delve too far into that vicious cycle she cupped his cheek and turned his face toward hers.

“I’m proud of you…” The words sunk into him. They were unfamiliar, or seemed that way. When was the last time someone had said that to him. Confusion must have been plastered on his face because she turned his attention back to her. “Astarion… I’m proud of you.”

“Why?” It was all he had to offer. 

“For not going through with it…” He moved to sit up, a little too quickly, and she had to sit back to avoid knocking heads with him.

“But I tried… I begged. That wasn’t me that stopped it, it was you…” His voice scraped at him as he tried to get out the words. “I was weak. I…. I was almost like him, like-'' There was a break in his voice and a quiver to his body. This time she sat right on his legs, he had nowhere to look but at her. Astarion shut up, and watched her, dizzy and confused.

“You made that choice, and kept it. I helped remind you of it.” Her fingers tucked one of his curls behind his ear. She swallowed thickly. “The spawn are in the Under Dark now, the children too. I was thinking of checking on them after this is all done… Gale talked to the Gur, Karlach brought you here. The others are leaving us for the night. They wanted to give you space… I didn’t want you to be alone.”

The words hung between them. In the spaces between them lay other words unsaid. Stay with me…. I’m not leaving you. His hands settled on her waist and he leaned toward her, just barely, a question in the movement. She had turned down any sort of advance before, but this felt different. She lightly closed the distance, placing a gentle kiss to his lips. Soft. Gentle. Warm. Different from times before, where things were mechanical, survival, manipulation. 

“Please stay.” He mumbled as he tucked his head into her shoulder. “Please…” They both eased down, into the bed and into each other's embrace. He didn’t let her go until morning.

—--------------------------------------------------

The battle for Baldur’s Gate had ended and with it Astarion’s days in the sun. He wished it could have lasted moments longer. Had time to enjoy it without the threat of transformation and death. However, he was now no longer alone. Zephyr and Astarion started their new journey heading back to Moonrise. The shadow lands no more, the land had begun to reclaim what the darkness destroyed.  They spent the day in the inn, which had gotten its walls and ceilings fixed. People had passed through it again, and life in general was returning. Next was to travel to the Underdark. The spawn looked to them for some guidance, anything at all really. They were lost without command, or lost without a purpose. Zephyr pulled some string with the weird mushroom people to help them out where they could. They brought letters from the Gur to their children, whatever relationship they forged from that, would be a tenuous one. Zephyr had even brought their book collection, to the dismay of Gale, down for all of them to read. Astarion could care less about helping any of them still, but he saw the joy it brought Zephyr and that was all that mattered to him now.

Lastly was heading back towards the Grove, or at least nearby. He followed her, off the path, and through the woods to the clearing with the grave marker. Grass covered the mound now, night flowers blooming as she sat down next to the grave. She waved him over and he followed and carefully sat next to her.

“His name was Andrus.” Astarion stilled. Even through all they’ve been through, the tiefling still hadn’t talked much about her past. “He was ten and he was my brother. We went out early in the morning…” Her hand brushed over the flowers. “We wanted to pick flowers to bring back to our matron. I helped her look after all the little ones. It was her birthday.” She pulled her hand back and let them rest on her lap, in a balled fist. “The nautiloid ship came overhead, we never had a chance. I thought I could protect him, but it took both of us.” Her voice became quiet, almost a whisper. “They took me first, putting the damn thing in my eye. I heard him screaming from his pod, trying to stop them….”

Her body leaned against his, Astarion wrapped an arm around her shoulders and rested his head on hers. “They tried him next…” He said against her hair, she stiffened. “Our first connection… I saw it… You broke out of that pod, which was… incredible. You saved him. I remember seeing you both run past me…” She tilted her head up, and he looked down at her, a sad smile on his face. “It’s alright.” Zephyr’s face broke into dismay. “Oh… oh no, it’s okay.” He moved his free hand to cup her cheek. “You did all you could…” Astarion was trying to hold back the flood that was coming, he could see it in her features but was the tears began to run down her face, he tucked her into him. “Zeyph… It’s okay. You’re okay.” There was the barest moment where she had stilled before trembling in his arms. He swallowed thickly and cleared his throat softly, giving the grave an apologetic look, Astarion was not a singer, usually.

“You’re okay…. You’re alright.” He started in a soft whisper, and he sighed and gathered her tighter against him. “I'll never, ever leave your side.” He felt the gaze of the grave on him, as if the spirit of a young boy was goading him on. You can do better than that….

“I will stay and I will fight

With you”

The tune began to form, he’s said the words before, maybe hummed the tune to himself. It wasn’t hard to pick it up, it wasn’t long, and it repeated. But he was never the comforter, and this was her song… She didn’t stop him though, in fact, she had slowed her breathing in his arms. She was listening. It was all the encouragement he needed to keep going.

“You're okay

You're alright

I'll stay here through the darkest night

All the way, I will fight

With you”

His voice petered off at the end and he looked to the grave with a quirked eyebrow, Good enough? Of course there was no response, at least not of a ghostly variety. 

“You… you remembered?”

“Of course I did. You practically sang in constantly. I don’t know how the whole world doesn’t know about it.” It was some of his old banter, something playful, distracting. It worked. She gave a wet laugh and swiped at her eyes.

“I did not… Did I?”

“Mmm, I may have exaggerated a little…” He admitted and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Thank you… for telling me.” He added and looked at the grave. “Andrus.” Astarion bowed his head. “Your sister is a hero, and the sun in my sky. I’ll keep her safe.” He said as he stood up and offered Zeyphr his hand. She leaned forward to kiss the grave marker before accepting his help, she used the momentum to  lift up on her toes to give Astarion a kiss as well. As they left, fingers entwined, a small breeze blew through the tiny glade, stirring the flowers and moving out over the ocean.

A new journey was starting, two new leases on life, neither alone any more.

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #astarion/tav #baldur's gate fanfiction #baldurs gate 3

[ethereal-bumble-bee]

Fanfiction Songs Part 1- Letter To Santa Fe

So, I love taking melodies/words/phrases from songs in musicals and making my own versions of them, so I’ve decided that I’ll take a few of my favorite ones (published on my Quotev account, etherealbumblebee) and post them here! Without further ado, here’s one of my favorites, Letter To Santa Fe, a short bit that comes after Santa Fe/Letter From the Refuge (with some small edits because I wrote this so long ago)!

(CRUTCHIE sits on his bunk in The Refuge, staring at the letter he’d crafted for JACK.)

CRUTCHIE (Spoken)

Aw, who am I kidding? He’s probably already gone now, hit the road to Santa Fe while I ain’t lookin’.

(CRUTCHIE begins to tear up, and stares out the window, wishing he could escape like he’d hoped. He’d never have admitted it to Jack, but he was tired.)

CRUTCHIE (To the tune of LFTR):

Where are you?

Far away?

Ran, when they took me here yesterday?

Left me here, and right here’s where I’ll rot

Help a buddy out, or it’s here I will stay

Though these guards

They’ve been rude

And I can’t stay, if I stay, I’m screwed!

But hey Jack, I’m still keepin’ hope

Though I can’t breathe, and I’m bout to choke

(CRUTCHIE coughs pitifully, and then chuckles sadly as he remembers LES doing the same thing to sell papers, at what seemed like an eternity ago. The laughs turn to sobs, and then CRUTCHIE begins to cry over the letter.)

CRUTCHIE (Through tears, to the tune of Santa Fe: Prologue)

Close your eyes

And imagine

I’m standing in those plains with you now 

And nothin’ can ever tear us apart again

Why, the minute that you see me

You’ll say, “Crutchie, my old friend!”

And maybe then we’ll be back to normal, no bitter end

But I’m scared

Can’t hold on

Santa Fe’s never been farther

And I don’t know if I’ll keep the train on track

But once them wheels make their way forward, no!

We ain’t never lookin’ back!

Don’t care how

We’ll leave now

(CRUTCHIE gets swept up in his dreams once again, not wanting to face the reality of where he actually was.)

CRUTCHIE:

Just you and me, Jack…

Where it’s clean, and green, and pretty

With no one to push us away

And we don’t hafta worry ‘bout finding a place to stay

And the bastards here, that beat us

Will be shipped off, locked away

Ain’t that neat?

Finally free

In Santa Fe

(CRUTCHIE, despite his attempts at being positive, finds his hope starts to dwindle as he remembers where he is)

CRUTCHIE:

Just… come home, is all I’m askin’

I’ve still got hope that you will show

Cause I’m dead if I can’t count on you today

But until then, I’ll hold on

To Santa…

(CRUTCHIE pauses for a split second, his voice breaking as he utters the next word.)

CRUTCHIE:

…Fe…

(CRUTCHIE collapses in sobs, for once completely alone.)

#songwriting #crutchie morris #newsies #broadway #crutchie newsies #song #fanfiction #musical theater #musicals

[kipperlillyforpresident]

Really feeling this blog's vibe on a spiritual level. Last night at midnight I heard a song for the first time that made me nearly cry because of how KLCK it was and immediately spent hours making an edit to post on here about it, and it might be the very best I've made. Why am I suddenly neck deep in love and feral protectiveness over a fictional hobbit teenager. Who knows. We have been infected by a fever.

omg it's an honor. you're one of the leadest scholars on kipperlilly copperkettle studies i'm glad i passed the vibe check.

but no literally. i think because so much of the fandom is like, insanely vitriolic to her, us few stans have had to like. become more rabid.

and of course, like. it's fine if people don't like her. she's a fictional character. and sometimes it's really fun to hate on a character - we love to see them be evil. so it's not like i begrudge people who have different opinions on her then i do.

but the way people talk about her... it's just really dire. they will really be posting sentences like "LittleBitch CuntFace needs to fall off a mountain and die painfully while Mary Ann watches and laughs" and wonder why klck stans are so protective...??? please stop pretending misogyny is cute when it lets you make epic owns on a fictional 16 year old :sob:

#asks #again i dont want to claim all klck haters are misogynists bc like. objectively false ad hominem etc #and i've seen that used as a defense on kristen a lot and i've found it annoying so i am a hypocrite i suppose #its just. hm. if she was a teenage boy i guess im saying the reaction would be a lot different

[tillidontneedfantasy]

A Track-by-Track Breakdown of Taylor Swift’s 10th Studio Album: ‘Midnights’

You would expect by the time a pop star has spent over 15 years in the spotlight that they would run out of steam. But on her 10th studio album, Midnights, Taylor Swift is as energized as ever. Even more impressive, the debut numbers are the biggest of her career yet, landing on a whopping 1.578 million, 1.1 million of those in pure album sales alone. These first week numbers are even larger than that of 1989, which is a huge feat.

Many pieces factor into success like what we’re seeing in this case. One is Swift’s exceptional marketing skills. Her dedicated fans will come out in droves to purchase her art, and the mysterious buzz that centered around the album intrigued the public to tune in. The star’s highly acclaimed releases of folklore (2021’s album of the year) and evermore (a 2022 album of the year nominee) during the pandemic certainly brought in a ton of new fans who perhaps overlooked her sharp lyricism before. But Taylor wants you to know that despite her magical stay in the forest and woodlands, she is in fact still bejeweled, and ready to remind everyone how much her shine still shimmers as a pop titan.

Presented as a loose concept album, Midnights centers on 13 sleepless nights throughout Taylor’s life (plus 7 songs on the “3am edition” that also fit the theme). Surely as she has been re-recording her albums as Taylor’s Versions, old feelings and memories have come to the surface that she is revisiting from a new perspective. Midnights still showcases Swift’s unmatched lyrical ability while taking us on a Jack Antonoff led synth journey.

1. Lavender Haze “All they keep asking me is if I’m gonna be your bride,” Swift laments on the opening track “Lavender Haze.” Which is funny because she spent 2019’s Lover with a bridge of wedding vows and a song about marrying her boyfriend of 6 years now, actor Joe Alwyn, with paper rings. But it is also an astute observation on how the world sees women, as she rejects “the 1950s shit they want from me.” She doesn’t want to follow anyone else’s wishes or timelines, or answer anyone’s questions, she just wants to stay staring at the ceiling with her partner, immersed in the lavender haze (a saying she caught from an episode of Mad Men). She knows that’s where she’s safest, because she’s “damned if I do give a damn what people say.” As an opening track, it delivers sonically and melodically, even in its smaller moments (the little “yeah oh yeah”s in the pre chorus are addictive), it’s a grand number.  Best lyric: “I’m damned if I do give a damn what people say.”

2. Maroon The title track of Swift’s project Red is placed at track two. So it’s no surprise that Swift placed a song with red shade as its title in the same spot. “Maroon” details all the little scarlet moments throughout the ups and downs of a relationship, some examples including wine, hickeys, the sky, and rust. The first verse shows the relationship at its peak, “laughing with my feet in your lap, like you were my closest friend,” and the second verse juxtaposes it with its breakdown, “sobbing with your head in your hands, ain’t that the way shit always ends?” The final chorus on the track holds some of Taylor’s most interesting (and sensual) vocal delivery to date, her lower register extremely impressive and underrated. Best lyric: “The rust that grew between telephones.”

3. Anti-Hero Do you remember in 2012 when everyone and their father would make jokes that Taylor Swift should write a song called “Maybe I’m The Problem” as a response to her breakup songs? Well, ten years later, she gave them something very close to what they asked. “It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem, it’s me,” she sings in the chorus of the lead single “Anti-Hero” (though not released prior to the album), which Swift claims to be one of her favorite songs she’s ever written. On folklore and evermore, Taylor sang about mental health struggles without explicitly saying that she was the subject of those songs. However, here, it is clearly autobiographical without question. As a fan, to hear her so blatantly say “my depression” in a song was both jarring and relatable. The track lays out her intrusive thoughts about herself, her maladaptive behaviors, ignoring people or pushing loved ones away instead of letting them in. While she sings “I’ll stare directly at the sun, but never in the mirror,” the song shows how much her music is safe haven for her to sneak a glance at her reflection.  Best lyric: “Did you hear my covert narcissism I disguise as altruism, like some kind of congressman?”

4. Snow On The Beach (ft. Lana Del Rey) The dreamy “Snow On The Beach” is a romantic love ballad in which Swift is mesmerized by the fact that the person she wants actually wants her back. She can’t quite believe their love, and she’s afraid if she speaks of it, she’ll find out it was an illusion all along. Throughout Swift’s music, and especially in this song, she uses light to describe her partner, singing “I’ve never seen someone lit from within, blurring out my periphery.” While Lana Del Rey, someone Swift hails as one of her musical idols, mostly singing background vocals might seem like an odd choice, just like seeing snow on the beach, it’s “weird, but fucking beautiful.” Best lyric: “Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful.”

5. You’re On Your Own, Kid “You’re On Your Own, Kid” is a journey through Swift’s life and career thus far. The song starts by detailing an unrequited love, which leads her to writing songs in her room and playing them in the parking lot, eventually running away and pursuing her dream of becoming a star. And although her dreams aren’t rare, her success surely is. But even at the height of her success, no longer sitting by herself at the lunch table at junior high, she still found herself alone. “I hosted parties and starved my body, like I’d be saved by a perfect kiss / The jokes weren’t funny, I took the money, my friends from home don’t know what to say.” She was degraded by the public and degraded herself. And just as things got better, her life’s work that she put her blood, sweat, and tears into was sold out from under her. But the Taylor’s Versions have been able to give her some solace, “Everything you lose is a step you take.” She ends the song on a hopeful note, reminding herself that she doesn’t have to be afraid; she’s always been on her own and she’s always made it through, and she always will. And the listener can resonate too. We’re all truly on our own at the end of the day, but we’ve gotten this far; we can keep going. Best lyric: “I hosted parties and starved my body, like I’d be saved by a perfect kiss.”

6. Midnight Rain On “Midnight Rain,” Taylor highlights the differences between the life she could’ve had and the life she pursued. “He wanted it comfortable, I wanted that pain / he wanted a bride, I was making my own name,” she (and a distorted voice) sings in the chorus. That life of a small-town girl is far away now, and not one she ever truly wanted, but one she sometimes sneaks a peak at through postcards and time portals and wonders what it might be like. Similar to “Lavender Haze,” this track establishes Swift’s aversion to societal standards, and her embracement of constantly changing and evolving, as evident through her music and career to date. It’s a real catchy ear worm, and after a few listens you really learn to love that voice distortion. Best lyric: “He wanted it comfortable, I wanted that pain.”

7. Question…? While Taylor leaves many hints as to what or who some of her songs might be about, “Question…?” Has one of her most obvious clues to date, as the song starts with a sampling of her song “Out of the Woods” from 1989, a song famously known to be about her relationship with Harry Styles. Not only is there the sample, but also lyrical parallels. “The rest of the world was black and white / but we were in screaming color,” she sings on “Out of the Woods.” On “Question…?” She says, “I don’t remember who I was before you painted all my nights a color I’ve searched for since.” One could assume while going back and rerecording 1989, she may have reflected on the relationship, with questions popping up. While it seems as if Swift knows the answers to these questions already, she still wants to ask them and get the confirmation and closure she’s searching for, a very relatable feeling. Just like in life, though, she doesn’t get any explicit answers in the song, but maybe she doesn’t need them anymore, anyway. Best lyric: “Does it feel like everything’s just like second best after that meteor strike?”

8. Vigilante Shit When listing the things that kept Taylor up at night, serving as inspiration for this album, one thing she cites is plotting revenge. In the revenge fantasy “Vigilante Shit,” Swift tips off the FBI about her enemy (presumably Sc**ter Br**n) and his “white collar crimes,” and assists his ex-wife in winning their divorce. “I don’t start shit, but I can tell you how it ends,” she croons. Which, historically, is true. Swift has rarely been the instigator of a feud or fight, but when she’s targeted, she comes back on top every time. After all, karma is her boyfriend. Best lyric: “Ladies always rise above, ladies know what people want / someone sweet, and kind, and fun / the lady simply had enough.”

9. Bejeweled “Bejeweled” is an exciting and fun pop song about letting go of the people and things that drag you down and allowing yourself to shimmer again. We can surmise that “Bejeweled” represents a night during a dead-end relationship where she finally prioritized herself again and learned she can still shine on her own right. In a radio interview, Swift said that “Bejeweled” mirrored her re-entrance into the pop landscape after her folk escapades, and that she had to pump herself back up into believing that she could still do it. The track itself proves that Swift stills rules without competition. Best lyric: “And when I meet the band, they ask, ‘Do you have a man?’ I could still say, ‘I don’t remember.’”

10. Labyrinth One of the few ballads on the standard edition, “Labyrinth” tracks Taylor’s thought process as she realizes she’s falling in love again, despite all of her fears after being burned in the past. She laments her pain and acknowledges her worries. The progression from “uh oh,” to “oh no,” to “oh,” before the line “I’m falling in love,” shows her trepidation turned to acceptance, due to the length’s this person would go to just to make her smile. While there are some synth sounds that seem slightly out of place, overall it is a song anyone who is learning to open up their hearts after being hurt can relate to. Best lyric: “Break up, break free, break through, break down.”

11. Karma “Ask me why so many fade, but I’m still here,” she sings on “Karma.” The answer? One could be her incredible talent and hard work ethic. But an additional answer is because her and karma vibe like that. In this catchy pop hit, Taylor reaps the rewards of staying true to who she is while karma takes down her enemies who never keep their side of the street clean. She knows karma is on her side, and she can relax trusting that it’ll do its thing. And so far, it has served her well. In the most Taylor Swift™ fashion of all time, she compares karma to a cat purring in her lap because it loves her. And it is! It does! Best lyric: “Karma’s a relaxing thought / aren’t you envious that for you it’s not?”

12. Sweet Nothing Co-penned by William Bowery aka Joe Alwyn, “Sweet Nothing” is a love song from Swift to Alwyn. She discusses all the negative things going on around her and the way people push and shove to get a piece of her, while her partner is just in the kitchen humming, asking nothing of her, just loving her as she is. We get a brief peak into their dynamic in the truly sweet lyric, “On the way home, I wrote a poem / you say, ‘what a mind,’ this happens all the time.” To be loved for your mind rather than your status is a gift for someone like Swift. I’m sure the poems are lovely. Best lyric: “Outside, they’re push and shoving, you’re in the kitchen humming / all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing.”

13. Mastermind A word that has been weaponized against Taylor over the years is “calculated.” On “Mastermind,” the standard edition’s closing track, she owns the claim, singing, “I’m only cryptic and Machiavellian cuz I care.” “Mastermind” is Taylor’s confession to her partner that she masterminded their entire relationship from the first night he saw her. She confides in him in one of her most personal lyrics yet, singing, “No one wanted to play with me as a little kid / so I've been scheming like a criminal ever since / to make them love me and make it seem effortless.” She thought no one could love her unless she tricked them into it. But upon her confession, his smile proves her wrong, because he knew the entire time that she thought she was masterminding their relationship, but in reality he went along with it because he wanted her too, schemes and all. She finally found her effortless love. Best lyric: “No one wanted to play with me as a little kid / so I've been scheming like a criminal ever since / to make them love me and make it seem effortless.”

3am Tracks

14. The Great War On the first 3am track, Taylor teams back up with her other folklore & evermore collaborator, Aaron Dessner of The National. “The Great War” seems to be about a fight in a relationship, and Swift’s difficulty bouncing back from it. She lays out her lack of trust from past relationships and how that has interfered with reconciliation efforts, as she sings, “And maybe it’s the past that’s talking, screaming from a crypt / telling me to punish you for things you never did.” But despite some of these maladaptive behaviors, her partner still reached for her hand, trying to make things right. And they did it, they survived, and that survival brought back her faith.  Best lyric: “You drew up some good faith treaties / I drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone.”

15. Bigger Than The Whole Sky “Bigger Than The Whole Sky” is a song about loss. Although the loss of exactly what is unclear, the grief is palpable. She searches for what might have caused such a tragedy, wondering if she was at fault. There are so many questions in grief to which we never receive answers. This song has resonated with many fans online, relating it to their own personal experiences of miscarriages, deaths, and pet losses.  Best lyric: “Every single thing I touch becomes sick with sadness.”

16. Paris In this fun pop song, Taylor compares the view of her partner to that of the city of Paris. She’s so in love that she might stop breathing, that she doesn't care about her friends’ gossip or what’s on the news. She’s transported into a world of romance where nothing else matters, where alleyways appear and cheap wine tastes like champagne. It’s the excitement of completely falling into someone as the rest of the world fades away. Best lyric: “I wanna brainwash you into loving me forever.”

17. High Infidelity “High Infidelity” is an intriguing track, produced by Aaron Dessner, about the end of an unhappy relationship. We can presume that she is referring to her ex, the DJ known as Calvin Harris, her previous long-term boyfriend before meeting her current partner, with lyrics like “put on your records and regret me” and “put on your headphones and burn my city.” In the song, Swift is implying that there was some type of infidelity, whether physical or emotional only is not quite clear, but either way she admits, “I bent the truth too far tonight,” and asks, “do I really have to tell you how he brought me back to life?” But she didn’t think it would matter much to him, and is surprised by his sense of betrayal and hurt, but not particularly remorseful. Best lyric: “You know there’s many different ways that you can kill the one you love / the slowest way is never loving them enough.”

18. Glitch Another Antonoff produced track written alongside Sam Dew and Mark Anthony Spears, “Glitch,” is one of the sexier tracks on the album. The concept is that Taylor can’t quite fathom how this love of hers has worked out for 2,190 days (that’s 6 years, if you didn’t know) and counting when all she’s been used to is situation-ships and dudes who give nothing. So if it’s lasted this long, it’s gotta be a glitch in the system, right? Best lyric: “And I’m not even sorry / nights are so starry, blood moonlit.”

19. Would’ve Could’ve Should’ve While “Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve” is arguably one of the best tracks on all of Midnights, everything Swift does is for a reason. When you listen to the song, it becomes quite evident why she put it at track 19. “And I damn sure never would’ve danced with the devil at 19,” she sings. As an avid fan, you immediately hear the echoing of the best song on her third album Speak Now, “Dear John,” which has the lyric, “don’t you think 19’s too young to be played by your dark twisted games when I loved you so?” And it becomes clear what she’s discussing: the power dynamic in her relationship when she was 19 with John Mayer, who was 32 at the time (Swift’s current age). One could assume rerecording Speak Now (which Swift has highly hinted at being the next rerelease) brought up some old feelings. “Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve,” is a powerful track filled with intense regret. She describes him as a “promising grown man,” putting a spin on the monicker often given in defense of younger men who abuse women. She likens the relationship to religion: “you’re a crisis of my faith,” “all I used to do was pray,” “gone along with the righteous.” This was a man that she idolized, and the fall from his pedestal crushed her in irreparable ways. “Give me back my girlhood, it was mine first,” she pleads with a heart wrenching ache in her voice. It’s hard to listen to this song without feeling pain for her, especially as she ups the octave for the outro, making the regret feel more urgent, more palpable. Best lyric: “God rest my soul, I miss who I used to be / the tomb won’t close, stained-glass windows in my mind / I regret you all the time.”

20. Dear Reader The 3am edition closing track is “Dear Reader,” a letter to her listeners. She gives advice about avoiding traps, starting over, keeping secrets, and aiming for the devil. But she also gives the caveat, “Never take advice from someone who’s falling apart,” supposedly referring to herself. But the best advice comes from those who have fallen, who have experience, who feel a range of emotions quite like Swift does. That’s why she is so popular; because people can relate to her words and they keep them close to their hearts. “You should find another guiding light,” she suggests. But this sign can’t stop me because I can’t read! Best lyric: “You don’t have to answer just cuz they asked you.”

Target Deluxe Edition

Hits Different The Target Deluxe Edition exclusive song “Hits Different” marks the return of Swift, Dessner, and Antonoff all together. The song feels very vintage Swift, almost like it could’ve been a recent “From The Vault” track. “Hits Different” is about a breakup that is much harder to get over than any other she’s experienced. She hears their song everywhere, she stops receiving invitations because she can’t stop slurring his name when she’s out with friends, she cries over a hat. She’s so far gone in this breakup that she thinks people are coming to take her away. Anyone who has experienced a tough breakup could probably find a lyric in this song to which they can relate. But even without being able to relate, it’s a fun, funny, enjoyable track served as a nice treat for loyal fans who actually go out and buy CDs these days. Best lyric: “I pictured you with other girls, in love / then threw up on the street.”

---

In conclusion, 16 years into her career, you best believe Taylor Swift is definitely still bejeweled, and on Midnights she shimmers more than she ever has, even when touching on long-gone relationships and peering into old wounds, being more vulnerable than she has on projects past. Each album and era seems like her peak, yet she continues to outdo herself in multiple ways. With more Taylor’s Versions on the horizon, hopefully Swift will continue to gain inspiration in various ways as a result of revisiting her old work. But if she doesn’t, we know she’s always got some tricks up her sleeve.

DISCLAIMER - REVIEWER’S BIAS: Taylor Swift is the mother I never had, she is the sister everybody would want, she is the friend that everybody deserves. I don’t know a better person.

#midnights #album review #taylor swift #lavender haze #maroon #anti-hero #snow on the beach #lana del rey #you're on your own kid #yoyok #midnight rain #question...? #question #vigilante shit #bejeweled #labyrinth #karma #sweet nothing #mastermind #the great war #bigger than the whole sky #paris #high infidelity #glitch #would've could've should've #wouldve couldve shouldve #dear reader #hits different

[blxckdragonfly]

Home Is A Fire (Darkness Finds You Universe #2)

(Song: “Home Is A Fire” by Death Cab For Cutie. 

Warnings: Mention of suicide, survivor guilt, and slight panic attack. 

Pairing: Chris Motionless and Lycia “Lai-shuh” Winters (played by Ana De Armas)

Synopsis: When Motionless are on set of their new music video for their song, Masterpiece-- the slightest sight of fire brings back a horrific and tragic memory for Lycia. 

Word Count: 1,701

Spotify Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5VqrFsU2bBiAX9D08UhTQ1?si=a30cdca97e654479

A/N: And we’re back with another story in this universe. This time I wanted to write something for the music video for Masterpiece, which is one of my favorite Motionless songs to date. I loved the video so much. So here it is, through Lycia’s eyes. Co-written with @blackrose-92​)

“Masterpiece” Music Video Set– March 13th, 2022. 

Chris and I have been seeing each other for the better part of a year now. He��s also happy knowing that the public eye doesn’t know about us, we’ve been keeping our relationship exclusive– the only ones who know about him and I are his bandmates, Ricky, Justin, Vinny and Ryan. But even when we’re in the public eye, we keep our affection to a minimum so that any paparazzi who are following us won’t catch on. Jeremy and I have also helped Motionless with the shooting for their new album, Scoring The End of The World as well as having them be in a new edition of Outburn Magazine. 

Today, I’d come with him as moral support while he and the band shoot their music video for Masterpiece, the second single off the album. The set they chose was this old house that reminded me of the house that inspired The Conjuring. I watched from behind the scenes and through the cameras as they filmed Chris’s scenes as he moved through the house, trying to find a way out but the doors are locked, him writing the lyrics to Masterpiece and him with the band performing the song. 

He tears the portraits off the walls, throwing them into a pile onto the ground before searching the cabinets to light them up on fire, he pulls down his hood and the flames come up and start to brush up against him. I feel my heart start to accelerate and my breathing quickens. 

I was driving home from the studio after shooting with Jeremy, I had parked my car in the driveway and I looked over onto the porch as I saw my boyfriend at the time, Marcus, when I noticed that something was off. I watched as he started pouring something all over himself. I narrowed my eyes until I noticed that he pulled out a lighter out of his pocket and a cascade of flame swept over him. 

I screamed. I screamed until my lungs were sore as my boyfriend slowly burned to death and collapsed to the ground. It wasn’t real. It didn’t feel real. I was frozen, I couldn’t move. 

I stand up from where I was sitting behind the cameras and I move upstairs into another part of the house, sliding down onto the floor as tears fill my eyes. I started crying hysterically as I buried my face into my knees, wrapping my arms around myself. 

“Please don’t take him away from me,” I sob into the empty space. “I’m begging you. Anything but that. Please.” 

I hear footsteps outside of the door and I pause, thinking it’s probably Ryan, Vinny or Ricky. I glance up at the ceiling. 

Plates, they will shift

Houses will shake

Fences will droop

We will awake

Only to find

Nothing's the same

Nothing's the same

“You can do whatever the fuck you want to me,” I say. “But please, don’t make me lose the love of my life.” 

Tears streaming down my cheeks as I hear the door open and I look up– I let out a soft gasp as I see Chris walk in. I sniffled and tried my best to wipe away the tears as best I could but he could tell that I’d been crying because he saw my mascara stained face. 

“Lycia?” Chris says as he slowly walks over to where I am, his eyes meeting mine with a look of concern. “What’s wrong?” 

“Whatever you’re planning on doing with fire, please don’t burn yourself alive. I can’t take it,” I told him. 

I watch as his face shifts into a look of confusion as I start crying again, sobs shaking my body. 

“What?” Chris’s voice is soft as he crosses the room that I’m in, kneeling down in front of me. His hand moves to cup my cheek, wiping away my tears. He moved to sit beside me, pulling me into his arms as I cried into his shoulder. “It’s alright, Lycia. I’m here. I’ve got you.” 

I cling onto him like I’m afraid that he’s suddenly going to disappear into thin air and I’ll never see him again. He moves his hand through my hair as I hear him softly shush me and cradle me in his arms as he places a gentle kiss onto my temple. Being in his arms calms the racing beat of my heart and I relax into his embrace but my body is still shaking. 

“Lycia?” I stay silent now that I’ve let that slip from my mouth. “Lycia, baby.” 

I can sense his brown eyes on me and I can’t look into them so I look away and down at my feet. I feel his thumb trace my jawline and lift my chin up so our eyes lock again. “What did you mean by saying not to burn myself alive?” 

I gulp softly as I try to ponder my words and how to tell him about this as best as I could. 

“Being around any type of fire or flame scares me,” I say. “It makes me feel like something bad’s about to happen to me.” 

“Why?” Chris’s fingers brush back a strand of my hair, I feel my breath accelerate. I stay silent, trying to regain my composure while his voice is gentle and honeyed. “Sh. Take a deep breath. It’s alright.” 

I feel my breathing slowing down at his words as I finally let out a deep breath and sigh. I close my eyes for a second, letting his embrace comfort me and let me think and relax before I can tell him the story that’s plaguing me. 

Home, home is a fire

Burning reminder

Of where we belong, love

With walls built up around us

The bricks make me nervous

They're only so strong, love

They're only so strong, love

“Because,” I explained. “The last time that I was in a relationship with someone, he burned himself alive. Jeremy knows about this too because he was the first one I called and sat with me as I spoke to the authorities. It was two years ago, before you and I had met. I was coming home from the studio and I saw my boyfriend at the time pouring gasoline all over himself. Before I could even get out of the car, he did it. He took a match and he…” 

Tears start falling down my cheeks and I see Chris’s face soften, his heart breaking. 

“I couldn’t save him. I’ve been living every single day with that pain. With the guilt of knowing that I should have done something. That I could have stopped it and I didn’t. I don’t want that to happen to you, Chris. I can’t bear going through that kind of pain again.” 

He looks stunned from what I’ve told him but after a few minutes of letting what I told him sink in, he puts both of his hands on my face, his thumbs wiping away my tears. 

“Oh, Lycia. Look at me,” Chris murmurs as I meet his calm and strong brown gaze. “It wasn’t your fault that this happened. What happened, as tragic as it was and it still is, it was completely out of your control. You didn’t know, so don’t blame yourself. But I will tell you this– I will never, ever leave you alone in this world. Okay? I promise you, you will never lose me like that. I cannot even imagine the amount of pain you’ve had to bear. But I’m here now and I will always be here for you.” 

I nod and he leans in, meeting my lips in a loving kiss– I wrap my arms around his neck and sink my fingers into his blonde hair, I deepen the kiss. We break away after a few moments, he rests his forehead against mine and my hands rest on the center of his chest, he moves to place gentle kisses on the side of my neck, his teeth softly grazing my skin, making me smile. 

“I’m sorry for leaving the set so abruptly,” I whisper as he shakes his head, silencing me with another gentle kiss. 

“Babe, it’s not your fault that you walked away. I should have known better about bringing fire into the music video if I knew it was going to affect you like this. I should be the one who’s sorry for not telling you sooner.” His voice takes on a tone of calm. I lean in and place a soft kiss on his cheek. 

“It’s okay,” I say. “You didn’t know. You wouldn’t have brought me here if you had.” 

He looks at me as his fingers brush the side of my face, my own fingers taking his and intertwining them. He brings our hands up to his lips, he brushes a kiss on the back of my hand, his thumb tracing my knuckles. 

“Do you feel better now?” Chris asks and I nod at him. 

“I always am whenever I’m with you, baby,” I whisper as he kisses me again, sweetly. He breaks away to kiss every inch of my face, I start to giggle and he relishes in the sound of them. 

“I love you,” He whispers as he kisses both of my cheeks. “I love you more than anything in this world.” 

I smile as I hug him closer to me. “I love you too. Always.” 

He kisses me deeply and passionately-- for me it felt like I was feeling his entire kiss for the first time but I also felt relief knowing that I could breathe without holding on to this guilt anymore, his fingers curling through my hair and brushing back strands from my eyes. 

“Hey you two! Stop fucking! We have a video to finish.” Chris and I break apart as we hear Ricky and Justin from downstairs. The way their voices sounded so annoyed made me start laughing, and Chris chuckled. 

“Come on, darling. Let’s not keep them waiting,” Chris offers me his hand and I take it, we both stand up together and head back into the room with the crew and his band and I go back to watch as they continue shooting with a huge weight off my shoulders.

Plates, they will shift

Houses will shake

Fences will droop

We will awake

Only to find

Nothing's the same

Nothing's the same

Nothing's the same

Nothing's the same

As yesterday....

#darkness finds you #darkness finds you universe #chris motionless #motionless in white #chris motionless x lycia winters

[cerriddwenluna]

Week 6 of the @gleedrabbleblog!

This weeks prompt: Hero

I have so many feels about this prompt, we'll see if I manage to write some of them down this week 🤞🏻

Warning: this is a sad one and I made myself cry while writing it 🙈 Extensive headcanons and full song lyrics will be under the break for those interested ♡

1.

"What's that?" Blaine asked while cleaning out old storage boxes. 

"I'm not sure," Kurt says, holding up a VHS tape. "It only has a date on it from just weeks before mom died." 

"We'll watch it together then."

The video opens on Burt pulling an exhausted looking Elizabeth to her feet as music plays softly in the background. He gently cradles her in his arms and they slowly dance across the living room. 

"Did you ever know that you're my hero?" She sings out in a shaky, but beautiful voice. "I can fly higher than an eagle, for you are the wind beneath my wings."

"Blaine, I–" Kurt chokes out with a sob. 

"I know love, c'mere," he says, holding his husband tight. 

Now technically, this is 123 words, but 23 of them are song lyrics, so I'm counting it as 100. It would have killed the story to edit away even more ;) ♡

While I firmly believe Kurt's mum was called Elizabeth, I am a bit more ambivalent about how she actually died. In this case its from an unspecified disease that means they knew her earthly end was coming.

Kurt was too young to fully grasp the enormity of it all, so they gave him a videocamera for his birthday so he could capture as many memories as possible, knowing he'd appreciate it later on.

Anything Kurt does, he wants to do well, and tiny lil' Kurt the videographer wasn't any different. Imagine him walking around with his camera glued to his hand 24/7 and you get the picture.

I imagine adult Klaine being somewhere in their late 20's. They are wildly successful and just moved to their first real family home in preparation for the arrival of little Feta. Cue cleaning out storage and bringing over some stuff from Lima now they have the space for it.

This makes it about 20ish years since he made that video, so no wonder Kurt doesn't remember it. He's been fairly emotional for a while, and very focused on (found) family ties and legacy. Any parents reading this might recognise these pregnancy symptoms ;)

There is a lot more that I could tell about this, so maybe one day I'll write it all out in a short fic 😊

Also, I never knew it till I went to write this drabble, but I now firmly believe that this is secretly what Kurt associates with his 'It's got Bette Midler' tattoo ♥️

Song lyrics for reference:

Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

It must have been cold there in my shadow

To never have sunlight on your face

You were content to let me shine, that's your way

You always walked a step behind

So I was the one with all the glory

While you were the one with all the strength

A beautiful face without a name for so long

A beautiful smile to hide the pain

Did you ever know that you're my hero

And everything I would like to be?

I can fly higher than an eagle

For you are the wind beneath my wings

It might have appeared to go unnoticed

But I've got it all here in my heart

I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it

I would be nothing without you

Did you ever know that you're my hero?

You're everything I wish I could be

I could fly higher than an eagle

For you are the wind beneath my wings

Did I ever tell you you're my hero?

You're everything, everything I wish I could be

Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle

For you are the wind beneath my wings

'Cause you are the wind beneath my wings

Oh, the wind beneath my wings

You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings

Fly, fly, fly away, you let me fly so high

Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings

Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings

Fly, fly, fly high against the sky

So high I almost touch the sky

Thank you, thank you

Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings

#gleedrabbleblog #klaine #klaine fanfiction #kurt hummel #blaine anderson #burt hummel #elizabeth hummel #week 6 #hero #grief is not a linear proces #so many feels #this might turn into a short story one day #gwen writes #a drabble is 100 words exactly #unless you include song lyrics #because I said so #tw: grief #tw: reference to terminal disease