#they aint joking

[fatherfigureneeded]

bro i went on a run wit my dog this morning and this shit deadass solved all my problems

#why am i going to therapy when i coulda been doin this for free #me and my dog #i love my dog #my therapist got a competitor #watch out mf ur job gettin snatched #well it wasn't free i spent 5.98 on some strawberries and a little treat for my dog but tis a small price to pay #i feel productive as fuck #i feel like my older brother #cuz he's productive as fuck #guys if u struggle wit depression im tellin u rn those mfs who tell u that exercise and good sleep and food and water helps #they aint joking #it helps #although i am a happy man #i have wanted to jump from a great height in the past lolz #anyway #that's the main point #that's what you should get from this #if you take anything away from this post it should be that i love my dog

[sp00ky-scary]

been looking for jobs again

#the way that saw doctor is like an actual job title #its like fixing saws but i think calling that role doctor is very silly #saw movies #lawrence gordon #ignore the redacting i aint doxxing myself for a joke

[spaceistheplaceart]

found an old ekurei comic rotting in my files, decided to finish it. upon my rewatch of mp100 i kept noticing how many times dimple was referred to as a pet- but he's not ! ! ! he's a friend :)

#not too happy w the writing but whatevs #sorry matsuo likers if hes ooc i used him as plot device #ekurei #mp100 #mob psycho 100 #reigen arataka #dimple mp100 #comic #op art #ok continuing my thoughts here bc i dont want a whole essay up there #ik reigen calls him a pet as well but its more joking imo and also #this comic is after s3 when they r sort of friends #in my ekurei timeline tho they aint fusing yet. just pals #maybe have fused a few times but nothin srs yet #for those who dont follow me that will not make any sense lol #but even mob calls him a pet sometimes! or dehumanizes him. like. mob. you are the ghost seer. you should know better #now i could be misremembering that but still #everybody treats him like a mosquito or something which is funny but hes a person #he just looks different :( #long post

[snailsnaps]

♪ (I Just) Died in Your Arms by Cutting Crew playing in the background...

Did I ever mention that the love of his life is a Bedrock block?

#bud's objectum i aint even joking #the literal love of his life #original character #minecraft #enderman #minecraft oc #enderman oc #enderman minecraft #minecraft enderman #feat: Zeph #endersona #snailsnaps #minecraft fanart #objectum #os/or #osor #Red's also here iguess -

[willowser]

bakugou definitely fails no nut november btw and he gets SO mad about it

#dont get me wrong he probably makes it most of the way #but he aint making it all the way through #lmaooo #and he thinks denki snd sero and kiri are all pathetic as hell when they talk about ut #*it #and he doesn't necessarily agree to do it but he thinks to himself. what a joke how hard can it be. #skgjdiwiqiq #by week three he and everyone around him is MISERABLE #✿ shut up willow

[nyaskitten]

$50,000... okay Lloyd, you sick fuck...

#I hope everyone gets the joke and i dont have to explain it #matter of fact lemme just explain it here so im safe-ish #cartoon beatbox guy spent 50k dollars for an animation of himself being chased by that h*zbin h*tel girl. charlie or smth #if this post is too weird or uncomfortable or something lmk and ill tag it however you want 😭😭😭 #i realize my slightly weirder jokes might be uncomfortable for some ppl i aint tryna do all thatttt... #ninjago #ninjago dragons rising #ninjago spoilers #raine's shitposting

[copepods]

i wish boobies got more hype beyond “haha bird with funny name” because they are actually so gorgeous… look at these guys

sleek. streamlined. beautiful. more sula genus love NOW

#gannets also <333 but this post aint about them #text #birds #ANYONE WHO MAKES A JOKE…. PLS I KNOW ITS FUNNY BUT NOT THIS POST. I JUST WANNA TALK ABOUT BIRDS

[martlet-my-beloved]

ran out of comic ideas so *gestures* take a doodle dump instead

First - Previous - Next - Masterpost

#oh my god tagging stuff for this au is a nightmare #undertale bluebird #martlet #undertale yellow #martlet undertale yellow #martlet uty #undertale au #frisk dreemurr #toriel dreemurr #chara dreemurr #chara: *points at martlet* excuse me who the fuck is this #i wanna escalate the story a bit further but i feel like the goofy vibes are gonna be ruined for a bit after i finally post that comic :/ #so i wanna like throw out a few more goofy ones before shit gets real for a bit #cause like a lotta jokes i wanna pull can only happen AFTER i set the scene #and unfortunately setting the scene requires a bit of seriousness(TM) #anyways im very much a momlet fan but only if shes extremely confused and very much Not Ready to be a mom #like girl is a what 21 year old who wanted to be a guard so she could slack off HER ASS AINT MOM MATERIAL #but like its really fucking funny so she gets to be a mom. for my entertainment #born to be fun older cousin forced to be a mother 😔

[spoiledmilks]

#my friends said im going to hell for this #(we have a running joke of us having a saved spot in hell #my friends aint bullying me its gud) #my art #fnaf #william afton #five nights at freddy's #digital art #purple guy #spoiledmilks art

[witchspeka]

I love my girl Miwa but as soon as I read that this image immediately popped up in my head:

#HAVE SOME STANDARDS GIRL DAMN #i want this relationship to work out too but this aint it #how do we relationship #cine te a intrebat #uhmmm theres SPOILERS past this tag in case u care to read this yourself just a quick warning #i kid i joke but this scene fucks me up i like how this manga handles queerness. it shows how messy and painful it can be #like we already got a bit of that with sae and her relationship with sex but this mmmmmm this one i didnt see coming #imagine u work up the courage to confess to ur high school crush and she says she cant date you #not cause she doesnt like you. quite literally /because/ she likes you and wants to take ur relationship seriously and respect you #but she cant do that. because shes afraid of people finding out. of having to hide all the time. of being ostracised. she's tired. #she cant find the strength to do that. #the frustration of being loved but society denying you the possibility of being together... ill clown on Miwa (its very easy) but i feel bad #for her #gaud i need to sleep hai pa

[roxiusagi]

Sangcheng week Day 1 - Occasions

🪷 While a cultivation conference was being held in Yunmeng Jiang, the Jiang-zongzhu and Nie-zongzhu rested together. In the morning, Jiang-zhonghzu would cut off the sleeve of his robes, so as not to rouse his resting lover, not knowing that said man would flaunt the piece later for all to see. 🪷

lol this was supposed to a proper two-parter to tie in the point together more clearly and all but...... i just didn't feel like finishing this part ngl so all you get is a sketch hjdsh

also dont think too hard about why would JC go to the conference in the ruined robes or why didn't he take them off in the first place when going to sleep or how did NHS manage to get it together so quickly just. don't worry about that ok. plot convenience jfhkd

close-ups of the girlies. yes lines only cuz im lines lover and colours hater (more like failure lol dfhkjh)

OH YEA BTW for those who dont know ye this is obvs a reference to the emperor Ai of Han and the whole cutsleeve thing lol

#my art #sangcheng #sangcheng week 23 #sangcheng week 2023 #nie huaisang #jiang cheng #btw this is meant to be when theyre not rly being public and the others at the conference arent rly catching on #except for jin ling lmao hes like hold on a minute aint that yours- hfdjk #so its meant as more like. an inside joke between them more than public spectacle #but you can interpret it however you like :)

[stressghoul]

you have gOT TO BE KIDDING ME

#jesus christ take me now #aint a joke no more #the band ghost #ghost #copia #ghost bc #papa iv #cardinal copia #copia is my husband #tobias forge #papa emeritus iv #copia my beloved

[shower-phantom-ideas]

Jazz becoming the next big Gothem villain is such a solid concept. Theres so much to explore.

She targets corrupt mental institutions. Corrupt companies who destroy their workers state of mind so they wont quit. She attacks landlords who make it impossible for people to live comfortably.

She is the staple anti-hero of anyone struggling to get back on their feet. People should have to work three jobs just to afford a crappy one bedroom, no utilities, half bath, in crime alley apartment, with a roommate.

Shelters should be aiming to gain a profit instead of using the donations to support others.

She is tired of these big name heros leaving children to clean up messes. She has watcher her own brother wither away to a shell of his former self trying to make a change and she is sick of it. Hell she herself is a child but if this is what it takes, then this is what it takes.

Enter from the left The Manipulator™️

Feared by all corrupt. People think she has mind control or something. When she targets someone they make almost a full 180 in their ways. “She will do anything to get her way or to make people into what she thinks they should be. And she mist be stopped” cries big business.

In reality she is the worlds best damn psychiatrist ever to be known. She doesn’t force anyone to change but gives them the choice to be better. To see how much more they can be. And it terrifies them. Helps them find themselves again and to move past their troubling pasts. No force and no mind control. No manipulating. No one but those who she has helped know the truth but when they tell the truth it only fuels the fire of her being controlling.

Theres one thing also fuelling the flames of mind control. Thats the fact that every single major hero to go after her can’t. Any who approach her find themselves no long near her. Superman just wants to talk, well she doesn’t, and he is then back in his city?!? Batman is stalking her to figure out how to deal with her but once he gets too close he suddenly finds himself in the batcave?

At first they think it’s teleportation but time is passing? Theres video feed and tracking of no they just went back themselves. No response from them the whole trip. As if possessed. (Lmao it’s just good brother danny pranking his sis a little by making her seem all powerful but also protecting her anyway he can. Or could be Dan instead)

#danny phantom #dp x dc #dpxdc #jazz fenton #manipulator? I hardly know her hehehehehehe these jokes are peak for me atm #jazz snaps and does some changing of the world #vlad is funding her because hes scared of her #no good tags today boiz I gotta call my mom and the hot water is gonw #yes yes I know I know I said I hate my mother but I am a good boi and will bring her lunch today so she eats #plus my sistet never leaves the house so im offering to take her too so maybe she can get some sun light #oh I got a promotion at work too btw #not the one I wanted but meh it’s something right? #gonna be working mon-fri 10hour shifts so ill be a bit busy sorry #got a catboi danny post in the drafts for you later though so u wont starve I guess #who am I kidding plenty of dpxdc posters for yall I aint gotta be worried #oof that makes me sad kinda so im a dip

[kalashnikovlobotomy]

stupid american let's hear you safeword now

#hetalia #aph russia #aph america #rusame #amerus #hetalia world stars #this is based on that one cold war joke where ame says he thought perestroika was the safeword #🏳️‍🌈 #also relax bro aint no one takin it from you release him

[self-indulgentmanic]

If Mashita aint dying from ghosts or lung cancer, itd probably be from a cold

#just something ive observed from brainrotting too hard #also this wouldve been perfect to post on mashita's ACTUAL birthday #but I aint waiting for like 6 months for a joke #death mark #spirit hunter death mark #kazuo yashiki #yashita #spirit hunter #satoru mashita #mashita x rain #spirit hunter: death mark #self indulgentmanic art

[sparta369]

Hey yall! In the spirit of having a safe and stress-free April Fools day, today I've curated a list of 18 different relatively harmless pranks that you can pull on your friends today! I thought of all of these myself, so please enjoy! :o)

1: You can send them a message saying something like "Hey! I bet you thought this notification was gonna be an april fools joke, but in reality, I just wanted to let you know that I love and appreciate you, and that I hope you have a nice day!"

2: Obtain a small, but noticeably out-of-place object (rubber duck, kazoo, etc.) and leave it somewhere you know your friend will see it, just to confuse them a little bit. Optionally, you could attach a little message to the object, letting them know it was you :)

3: Understandably, hiding your friend's belongings can be very distressing for them. Instead, hide one of your own belongings and ask them to help you look! Let them find the object. For bonus points, leave a kind message attached to the object for them to find.

4: Just simply hand them a random object. Don't hide whatever is in your hands, make it clear what you're handing them. Just ask them "hey, can you hold this for a sec?" and when they take it, just walk away.

5: Underneath everything they post on social media that day, leave a reply saying something along the lines of "I love and appreciate you" or some other nice thing. Do not stop. Be relentless.

6: Stop them when you're walking near/past each other. pretend to pull a hair/fuzzy/etc out of their hair, off their shirt, etc. Do this slightly more frequently that it normally happens. Don't make a huge deal out of it. Admit it if pressed or at the end of the day.

7: To expand on the previous one, you could instead pretend to pull a fuzzy/hair/etc off of them... and then pretend to eat it.

8: Leave out pieces of their favorite candy or other small, packaged snack in any place you believe they'll run into it throughout the day.

9: Order a pizza with them. Make the pizza half something they like, half something you like. When it gets here, pretend to get huffy about the toppings being on the wrong sides. (X should be on the left, Y should be on the right, etc.)

10: Spontaneously pretend that you have lost something. When your friend asks what you lost & if they can help you search, point at them, sigh in relief, and say something along the lines of "oh good, you're right there, I thought I'd lost my whole world."

11: Tell them that you're going to the store to get something mundane and uninteresting. Instead, go out and purchase your friend a surprise gift. This can be an object, food, anything. Pray they don't ask you to pick something up for them.

12: Take a photo of yourself and print it out. tape up behind a door that you know they will close, such as their bedroom door or a bathroom door. For bonus points, leave a nice message with it.

13: Hang a worm on a string or other silly item from the blades of their ceiling fan. Don't tie them on too well, make sure they're easy to remove.

14: Every time they sneeze, cough, or anything like that, pretend to be disproportionately worried about them. Use this as an excuse to do nice things for them throughout the day.

15: Gearing up to go out somewhere with them? ask if you can borrow one of their shoes. That's right, only one.

16: Ask them if they can leave you alone in the kitchen for a while. Make it clear that you are preparing an April Fools prank for them. The prank is, instead of making anything weird, you just made completely normal food for them. Comply with their requests for proof.

17: Make a paper sign that says something incredibly nice, like "I appreciate you." Keep it with you. Whenever your friend looks away from you, try to quietly extract the sign and show it off in their general direction. Try not to get caught until the end of the night.

18: Ending our list, you could show this list to your friend, and then make them put together the first letter of each prank that I've just listed for you.

I hope you all have a nice, safe, and stress-free April Fools Day!

;o)

#april fools 2024 #april fool's day #prank #pranks #jokes #I'm going to be crucified for this one #memes #Im doing this same joke on twitter in the form of the thread #if you see it in any form that isnt a thread #or it isnt somebody called sparta #that aint me #off with their heads