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inkskinned · 9 months

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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

#almost wrote the champagne line as ''effervescent'' but legit could not write it without saying ''effervescent like a snail''#ah tumblr...#writeblr #warm up #idk . having trouble writing rn #ps i don't like to talk about it . it is my medical information. but before you ask. yes this is about being on the spectrum #i really don't like when ppl make my writing about how im [whatever ID]. i want it to ring true for the people who it rings true for #i don't want it to be like ''awwwww look at this person!!! she's the EXCEPTION!!! :)" .....#no.... not really.....#idk something gross happens whenever i admit to certain conditions and i turn into like inspiration p*rnography #like yes they actually let us use keyboards these days #furthermore i just... dont feel comfortable talking about this part of me. i had too bad of a childhood. adhd is one thing...#this one im like. still coming to terms with. which is like. my own journey.#idk. just please be kind. some things are more private than others. this one feels private to me.#i do not know how to help others w/this . and i do not know how to help myself. i will talk about it if im ever ready. idk if that will #actually ever happen #ty in advance i love u im kissing you we are kissing somewhere on the spectrum

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akantorrr · 4 months

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#wow akans is back to drawing ultrakill stuff? impossible!#ultrakill #gabriel ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #gabv1el #digital art #v1 #akans art #I actually really really really love how this one turned out #starting off 2024 with a banger (at least for me)#absolutely inspired by that other coahuilaceratops piece I did the other day- on my alt #tarot card or church stained glass; I don't know what this is but it's becoming my comfort art style #drawing/doodling like this is therapeutic for me istg xD just straight lines and circles and dots :>

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mayasaura · 1 year

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I don't wanna further hijack that poor poll, but the thing about Harrow's schizophrenia is that it's canon. The author has confirmed it, and shared that it's based on her own experience.

It's a pretty obscure bit of canon, so of course there's no shame in not already knowing, but that's why I'm so obnoxiously persistent about letting people know.

Whatever else is up with Harrow, autism or cptsd or any number of likely headcanons, she is also schizophrenic. I feel like that's too important to be handwaved away as a difference of opinion.

#like of course not everyone knows I'm not the kind of asshole who gets mad about someone not having heard about an unrecorded con panel #not knowing is one thing #erasing or ignoring that aspect of her is something completely different #like yeah she's incredibly relateable in that way #and I know how comforting it can be to project your own dx onto someone and go 'wow shes just like me fr'#but I really feel like doing that re: Harrow's schizophrenia is a huge lost opportunity for growth #and I hate that the takeaway for so many people is 'Harrow is autistic'#and not 'oh cool didn't know autism and schizophrenia had so much overlap in experience'#relate to psychotic people without flinching challenge #anyway. tl;dr:#if you didn't already know then I have the coolest new fun fact about Harrow to share with you!!#if you do already know but have elicted to ignore it then a little bit fuck you actually #but I will ALWAYS assume someone didn't know before assuming they're being a dick #the locked tomb #harrow nonagesimus #harrowhark nonagesimus #harrow the ninth

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himmelmidgard · 7 months

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Maybe someday Sora will figure out why he wants Riku to call him this bad… 👀

#I was making it so long you don’t even wanna know…#or do you??#according to procreate it took 17 HOURS!??#(including testing the font I made for this so prob it was less of actual drawing time)#still more than I thought…#but it was a good practice!#I tried to really pay attention to the comfort of reading the panels and not making them look too similar to each other #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts 3 #kh #kh3 #kh sora #kingdom hearts comic #kh comic #my art #kh soriku #soriku #kingdom hearts soriku

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comradekatara · 2 days

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a really defining moment of aang and sokka’s relationship is that sokka literally lets himself get beat up for aang’s amusement and entertainment like a day into knowing him. like he is literally letting aang drop him onto the ground from a not insignificant height over and over again just to see aang smile and laugh. he is putting his own safety and physical wellbeing at risk because it makes aang happy. and there’s a lot we could get into here about how sokka fundamentally views himself and his body as a vessel through which to provide services to others instead of a whole human being in his own right, but what matters for the purposes of this post is that it’s very immediately established that sokka will do anything to see aang enjoy himself, to the point that he will quite literally put up with physical abuse without complaint to make aang happy. so when people are like “it’s crazy how sokka is so smart and yet loses all his braincells whenever he’s around aang,” it’s like yeah, teenage boy adhd2adhd communication will do that, but also a large part of it is sokka contorting himself into an image that he thinks aang will appreciate, because he knows just how valuable preserving aang’s childhood joy and laughter is.

and what’s beautiful is that through actively becoming this person for aang’s benefit, he also actually starts to internalize the sentiment. through the process of letting himself be silly and goofy for the sake of making aang happy, he also absorbs some of that sillygoofy happiness and regains some of his own childhood joy and laughter and sense of wonder he truly thought he had lost forever. he’s not just helping aang retain his childhood, but aang is also helping sokka regain his sense of humanity. the sokka of book 3 is someone who enjoys “wacky, time wasting nonsense” and throws beach parties, a far cry from the sokka of book 1 who thought fun and joy were luxuries no one could afford. his selfless love for aang is also self-affirming, helps him to embrace aang’s point of view, to love himself slightly more than he otherwise would have. because to love aang is to necessarily let kindness into your life; it’s to learn how to be free.

#sometimes i remember that aang is fictional and i cannot actually be friends with him and i feel genuinely distraught #but i am comforted by the knowledge that we WOULD be friends were he real and that’s what matters #aang #sokka #aang&sokka #analysis #there are a bunch of rly fucked up directions i could take this post #but i think I’ve talked abt the fucked up aspects of their relationship plenty lately #and there’s also smth just so beautiful & poignant & sweet about how sokka doing his whole ‘denying the self to serve another’ shtick #kind of just backfires with aang because he inadvertently learns how to have fun #i do also think suki is really the person who increases his general happiness levels the most tbh #but like. aang laid the groundwork for sure #holds them….

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turbo-tsundere · 1 year

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Kokichisake-onna

*Happy anime narrator voice*: “And thus, Kokichi has once again successfully evaded the dread of emotional openness!”

Also here’s a random selection of derpy concept doodles for this comic :)

Thank you byeeeeee

#gonta gokuhara #gokuhara gonta #kokichi ouma #ouma kokichi #kokichi oma #featuring shuichi xD #ougoku #awwgoku #my art #I wanted to post it on ougoku day but work and migraines piled up on me and I really wanted to give this one the time it needs!#If you know the legend you know why Shuichi is panicking XDD #Look into Kokichi's eyeballs in panel 3 and see the sad hope against hope and yet! he still actively sabotages any comfort coming his way!#Is Gonta just kind or is his compassion a warped mix of compulsive fawning and misplaced empathy that keeps inviting menace into his life?#there's a secret sadness to this silly comic lmao and it's those poor sods' autopilots #I say laughing but by god do they need help #anyway enjoy! I might try posting more of Gonta ships I like - like this one; or with Shuichi; and some others 8D #btw I LOVE Gonta's scariest sprite - fantastic detail bc it does look like a snarl and ofc a wild child would imitate animal expressions!#and 2 out of 3 times he uses it he's actually NOT angry but hyped or frustrated - both cases also smth I appreciate for certain reasons #his actual 'serious angry' sprite is far more toned down in comparison

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frogs-in3-hills · 6 months

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[ID: A digital sketch of Leo and Raph from Ninja Turtles 2003. They sit on a couch together, with Raph leaning his head on Leo’s shoulder and gesticulating with his hands, an annoyed expression on his face. There’s an arrow pointing to him labelled “just having a nice time complaining about some shit”. Leo is sitting ramrod straight with a severe expression, but he’s visibly crying. There’s an arrow pointing to him labelled “Realizing he’s having a once-in-a-lifetime experience like when a cat who hates you sits on your lap”. End ID.]

#03 raph is actually really physically affectionate but it’s only when he feels like he needs to comfort one of his brothers #(canonically)#so i feel like it’d be very rare for him to lean on anyone/be the metaphorical little spoon of a given gesture #tmnt #tmnt 03 #leo&raph #leonardo splinterson #raphael splinterson #described #silly sully art

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puppyeared · 5 months

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doodles of my fav sillies

anton belongs to @poicyss

#my brain is a barbie dreamhouse and theyre all just living in it #im especially fond of the second one because my mom used to hold me like that all the time <3 #im drawing them a lot lately because im being crushed by the horrors and have to compensate for it somehow #homemade comfort blorbos......#watch me draw anton inconsistently bc i can never decide if i wanna draw him close to how he actually looks #or yassify him and give him soft fluffy hair and kind eyes and defined features. head in my hands #i dont really have a lot of drawing ideas for them bc they dont have like. a canon storyline or anything methinks #its just stuff me and bow toss around and giggle abt thru messages lol. maybe ill draw infant vincent one of these days #i just come up with stuff and draw them doing it. it makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside #cuz like anton works for lobocorp as an abnormality BUT hes super duper chill and cute and does his funny little tasks so its fine #AND hes unkillable. auggie is an oc ive had since like 6th grade and i smushed them together. and vincent was for fun but i got attached #i dont have much of a read on anton either bc i think hes meant to be more of an insert character??? if im using that right #on one hand i dont think too hard abt anything being ooc since im not taking it seriously. on the other hand i just hold them in my hands #and stare into space until i can come up with something to draw since i dont have much to go off of. but its fun to build on small tidbits!#i think bow called it an au so i guess??? its an au????? im not really sure. bow if youre reading this im just willy nilly #the only thing i know for sure is that they boink like rabbits. im talking gomez and morticia levels of boinking #maybe ill go back and look at my old doodles for them and redraw em lol #myart #my art #my oc #oc #friend oc #augusta #anton #vincent #sillies family #doodles

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deadunderorbit · 9 months

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I’m relearning how to draw (I don’t remember when was the last time I touched my pen)

Here’s some ghostsoap sketches :]

ref

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inkskinned · 7 months

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as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen

the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"

#my food crime is that i regularly make a “pasta and tuna” situation that has somehow gotten even more evil and degenerate over time.#it is a ''white wine reduction'' (it's just white wine and garlic powder & seasoning)#and tuna from a can.#and plain pasta.#if i have the spoons i will actually chop garlic for it but this tends to be my comfort food for a REALLY bad day #bc its super easy to make:#boil pasta. drain. put into bowl for later. into same pot u used for pasta.#put tuna (with oil/water from can). let fry a little for like 2-3 min. put in whatever amount of wine. season to taste.#the tuna will get a little crisp on it which is nice. important side note:#this began as a Bolognese sauce.#and one day i had to sub for tuna. i know. not ideal. i cried about it too.#somehow over time it is now its own little evil thing. i would never make someone else eat it. it is beautiful.#but yeah i don't even stir the pasta in afterwards i just slap pasta into serving bowl #slap this ''''''sauce'''''''' on top #molto bene #(i really can cook fairly well btw. this is a food crime. not a suggestion of skill or ability)#(i LOVE baking but when i cook for myself. the autism is obvious. bc i just don't understand the point of most of the steps)#(.... i can just eat the deli meat out of the bag. it is protein. i don't even have to like it. i just have to eat enough calories.)#(also i used to cook MUCH more before this apartment which is so small that i can stretch my arms out and overreach the counter length.)#(.... i'm 5.2. so.)

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comfort-character-central · 1 month

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I want to hold my f/o, I want to hug my f/o, I want to scream into the void about how much I adore my f/o, and I want to show my f/o how much they mean to me, I want to protect my f/o at all costs, I want to giggle because of my f/o, and I want to show my f/o the love they deserve.

#FUN FACT I AM YEARNING EVERYONE DONT MIND ME #I really need to make more posts about this kind of thing where I show who I am #I need to left the internal urge to go silly about my f/o free from my soul cage #anywho I love this blog I love my followers I love my f/os and I love it here right now and always actually #f/o community #f/o positivity #f/o x s/i #self ship #fictional other #comfort character

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operationcaked · 8 months

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twitter really liked this, so i’ll post it here too :))

#*ahem* sorry i meant x really liked this #bob’s burgers #wharf arts center (art tag)#actually here are some notes about my designs for them yay —>#gene’s shorts are frayed because they’re bob’s pants that he cut into shorts #(like he mentioned in either wharf horse or the wharfening)#his pockets are paw-shaped and linda sewed them on for him (they’re paw-kets!)#tina has compression socks on under her regular socks because i headcannon that she has rls and knee pains #< inspired by her thrashing in her sleep but also because i have rls and knee pain and i’m projecting #they each have friendship bracelets that tina made in tina tailor soldier spy (pretend she made one for gene too)#i’ve posted louise in my design before but i’ll explain hers too #added a brown undershirt and purple striped socks because i love how the colors go with her color scheme #also gave her socks because i hate the feeling of wearing mary janes without socks and she deserves comfort #the other bracelet louise has is one that millie made for her louise and rudy #that's all really any other changes were made just cause i think they look nice ^^#gene belcher #tina belcher #louise belcher

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turtleblogatlast · 7 days

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[ cw: violence mention / death mention / ]

Will never stop thinking about how Leo, all alone in an endless void and being beaten again and again and again by the only other living thing around, still finds comfort in that space. The situation he was in was completely hopeless, and in any other circumstances he would not have escaped, at least not fast enough to save him from permanent (or even fatal) damage, be it physical or mental.

And yet, despite the bleakness of his situation, despite the agony and helplessness, all he needs is one glance at a crumbled photograph, one glance to remember his family, and that’s enough of a reason for him to smile.

Maybe that’s why his powers center around manipulating space - because no matter how much space is between them, no matter how dire his own situation may be, just the thought of his family, alive and okay, is enough to give Leo hope.