#this one will be i think a true test of who is rockin with us fr and who might not be

[oraclechats]

Tune in tomorrow at 1 pm for REAL Hater Hours!

#the oracle files #band of brothers #hbo war #happy valentines day lmao #this one will be i think a true test of who is rockin with us fr and who might not be #and thats ok!

[mhdiaries]

Wave 4 Journal of Jackson Jekyll

On September 9...

So it turns out I’m a monster. Well part-time monster actually, which leaves me pretty much full-time confused. It’s not like I didn’t know that mom and dad were both monsters. The first time I saw mom’s Hyde side come out was when I was 5 and we were visiting my dad’s side of the family. Some of the little neighborhood monsters decided that they were going to play “kick the can” only they were going to use me as the can. Every time I tried to run home they blocked my way and pushed me down. I started crying and then they really started making fun of me. Then all of a sudden I heard this roar and there was my mom. Even though it didn’t look like her I knew it was and honestly all I could think was, “Why mother, what big muscles you have.” Needless to say I never had any problem with the local monsters again. Dad’s a fire elemental of course and I grew up playing with Heath so I was never afraid of monsters. I just didn’t think any monster heritage had passed on to me. When I asked mom and dad if they knew me and Holt were the same person they said, “Of course we knew you and Holt were the same person - we’re your parents; now finish your breakfast or you’ll be late for school.” Well thanks for clearing that up for me mom and dad. Cause you know it’s not like having that little bit of information would have been helpful at all. Good thing I’m past those awkward teenage years where news like this could really have a negative impact on my psyche. (Ooh - sarcasm. I like it) HH

On September 12...

I had to go to the mad scientist, I mean mad pediatrician, today. Mom says that until I’m an adult I need to continue seeing him because he has the most experience dealing with growing monsters. I feel fine but mom and dad are worried because what triggers my transformation to Holt has changed. It used to happen when the sun went down but now it seems to be loud music, I think. The waiting room was almost empty except for a mother werewolf and two young cubs. While mom filled out paperwork I sat down and tried to find something to read that wasn’t chewed, gooed or covered in monster germs. Then I heard one of the werewolf cubs say, “Mommy! Is that a normie?” “Yes honey, don’t stare.” “Is he going to eat us?” I could tell that she was embarrassed so I said, “No way - I’m totally allergic to werewolf it makes me sneeze - ACHOO!” The cubs eyes got really wide and then she started laughing, “Aw that’s not true.” Then she held up her foot and said, “I can tie my shoe!” I said, “That’s amazing, can you show me how?” The werewolf mom relaxed too and it turns out she’s related to Clawd’s family. Pretty soon a lab assistant appeared, “Jackson Jekyll?” She led us back to a room and said, “The doctor will be with you shortly.” Then, “The wait.” Which means sitting on the crinkly paper covered exam table forever and wondering what would happen if I started playing with the instruments in the exam room and the doctor walked in. Anyway just about the time I woke up enough boredom and courage to start picking up some of the cooler looking instruments laying on the counter I hear the mad pediatrician pulling my chart and the door opens. He’s wearing a lab coat with purple vampire ducks and his stethoscope cover is a fuzzy yellow dragonhead. I’m sure it calms the younger monsters but it scares the normie out of me that the volatile nature of my elemental side + my hyde heritage + being a teenager = constant change. He said that the trigger would probably change again before I reach adulthood. Then he gave me a lollypop, scheduled me for another test and said he wanted to see me again in three months. Now I’m worried about what the trigger is going to change to next. What if it’s showers? Would it be worth giving them up for the rest of high school just so I can have my own life? (Not unless you want your new nickname to be “Stinky”) HH 

On September 21... 

It seems like I spent the first part of my life wishing I was a monster and now that I am maybe now I wish I wasn’t. (Well you’re stuck with it now.) HH When I was spending all that time trying to get Draculaura to bit me so I could become a vampire I never really thought about anything except wanting to fit in with all the other monsters. Now the part of me that fits in doesn’t even get to enjoy it.(Whine much?) HH It’s like the worst of both worlds and now I don’t fit in anywhere at all. We’re all supposed to meet with Mr. D’eath, the school guidance counselor, this week. Wonder if I’ll need to make two appointments (Lame - I already know what I’m going to be... FAMOUS!) HH

On September 23...

So I had my appointment with Mr. D’eath today it started out  about as terrible as I thought it was going to be. Turns out he’d never counseled a “normie” and it seemed like he didn’t know exactly what to say. In fact, he mostly just spent a lot of time squeezing one of those stress balls made to look like a cartoon character with eyes that bugged out when you squeezed it. It was pretty distracting especially when I realized it was a cartoon “normie”. The squeezing wasn’t nearly as distracting as his “throat clearing” which kind of sounded like a hand full of marbles being run through a garbage disposal. I kept trying to figure out how he made that noise because he doesn’t really even have a throat since as far as I can tell he’s pure skeleton. He must have flipped through my permanent record ten times before he finally said: So you see Hackson... I mean Jackson, the career opportunities for normies in the monster world are somewhat er... um... (sound of marbles being run through the disposal again) limited. There’s monster hunter, monster hunter’s assistant, mad scientist, ooh hunchback! You don’t happen to have a hump do you? No? Bad luck there then. Ah hah! How about Monster/Normie Relations Expert? (Figured it’d be something where the wardrobe is even less cool than what you wear now) HH Well that was something I certainly knew a little something about. I had an old coach in the normie world that used to always say, “Play to your strengths Jackson, play to your strengths.” So Mr. D’eath loaded me down with college brochures and rushed me out of his office. I think both of us were glad it was over. 

On October 8...

Finally took that test my mad pediatrician set up for me. It turned out to be a test to determine the type and volume of music that brings out Holt. So I sat in a soundproof booth wearing headphones while a technician played music at different volumes and with different time signatures. I made it through waltzes, marches, polka and chamber music but I don’t remember what he played next. (That’s when he started playing the good stuff.) HH Anyway the results of the test isolated the trigger; music with a 4/4 time signature played in excess of 90 decibels. You know what’s good about this? Me neither.

On November 2...

It seems now that every monster knows Holt and me are the “same” person/monster I don’t get hassled as much for being a “normie”. Not that it makes any difference to Manny Taur since he pretty much wants to bully down on any creature who’s smaller than he is. When he first started picking on me I stood up to him cause once a bully knows he can push you around he’ll never stop, but Deuce finally took me aside and said, “Listen bro - you’ve won a lot of respect standing up to Manny and don’t take this the wrong way but...” Apparently Manny was waiting for the right time to mash me like a slow matador. I kept waiting for it to happen but it never did. In fact it seemed like Manny was purposely avoiding me for some reason. It was almost like some monster had said something to him. (Yeah - wonder who that could have been?) HH

On November 15... 

Headless Headmistress Bloodgood asked for “volunteers” to help with the middle school carnival fundraiser so Deuce and I volunteered for set up and take down duty. It was cool and we didn’t have to dress up like clowns or sit in the dunk tank. We set up tents, carried boxes then hung out and waited for everything to be over. We checked out some of the other booths too cause we had plenty of time to kill. Venus and Draculaura were doing face painting; Rochelle was teaching monsters how to build sand castles, some of which would have looked pretty good if they hadn’t been built next to Rochelle’s sand cathedra with working bell tower and miniature gargoyles. The best though was the stunt Robecca performed. She flew over the carnival a couple of times to get every monster’s attention then flew straight up until it sounded like her rocket boots stalled and she came streaking back toward the ground like a falling star. A huge gasp went up from the crowd as it looked like she was going to crash then she fired her rockets back up and totally buzzed the crowd less than 20 feet off the ground! It was so awesome I actually gave Holt a chance to see her second performance. (Thanks dude - it was totally rockin’ and I would have been bummed if I didn’t get to see it) HH When the carnival was over we helped take everything down and all the volunteers went to hang out at the Coffin Bean. It was dark by then and I would have missed out on that part of the fun if things were the same as they used to be. Still hoping I won’t have to give up showers someday though. (That makes both of us “Stinky”) HH

#monster high #monster high diary #monster high journal #wave 4 #jackson jekyll

[thereturnofthedirtyblog]

The DIRTY DIRTY Tea 🍵👀

I did the preface to this post as there are thousands here on the blog. Many are avid participants and then there are hundreds that are watching and reading. I am going to say this now and heed my words: If you are here because you are in love with Zak, feel he is something you idolize or just are blind to how actual humans are then stop now. This blog was not easy to create for me. Why do I keep going? The more girls that see this blog and run the other direction from Zak is worth it. There are those girls (to many to count) that want to hook up with Zak cause he is a celebrity crush. They get flown in by Zak for a weekend then are on a plane home. They move on with that memory. However, there are many girls that believe they are the one and only dating him. Its a web of manipulation and verbally abusive behavior that impedes their mental health. They get “screwed” over literally and sideways from him. As for Holly, she is almost 40 so IMO if Zak wants to screw her over till the end of time I really don’t care! Why? She has 20 years at least on Zak’s preferred flavor of girls. She has sniffed, sucked, fucked, blown, and done probably everything sexually and for money. So here we go...again...do not read if you are going to freak out. I will put my commentary in ( ). 

1. So the girl that contacted me gave me all the receipts you could want: photos, plane ticket, phone number, etc...she was on point. She did ask NOT to show them as she does want to maintain her privacy. As always this is verified and you all that have been here a long time know my credibility (<--Bad GA pun). We here at the blog did catch her in a Zak IG story and I will leave it at that. 

2. She @ him on social media and he slid right into her DM’s. He right away asked how old she was and where she was from. (I never can get out of my mind the “U in Vegas” line that he does often- TDB). Quickly it went to phone and text conversations. She is under the age of 21 and really pretty with a rockin’ body. 

3. A few weeks later she was on a plane to see Zak for the weekend. He bought her the plane ticket and Bacon picked her up from the airport in the Rolls. She knew going into the situation that it was going to be a hook up so no illusion of a relationship. She was transported to the house and she stayed in the guest room (the infamous room where the girls always stay except Rosie was in the master-TDB) She also confirmed that he does not sleep in the master bedroom and never got to see his actual room he sleeps in. (We all know it is the one room with no windows-TDB) She felt odd in the house like she wasn’t allowed to roam around but did find it weird that Zak was in the master bedroom in the morning with all the windows open just looking out to the pool. She also did mention that she had to shut the door to her room so that Gracie wouldn’t shit or pee in the room since she will do that. (We all know here that it was confirmed Zak let Gracie shit and pee all over his master bedroom bed after the Rosie debacle. He has now turned that bedroom into a gym.-TDB)

4. Right when she got to the house it was right to having sex. He put NOOOOoooo effort into it, she was on top the whole time, and he didn’t take off his clothes. So yeah his glasses were on and he laid there like a slug while she did all the work. He did “direct” her to “get on top of him” or “suck on it.” She never got to choose what to do and always on top doing the work. Did she “get off?” HELL NO. He didn’t even try. Gracie was in the room the entire time watching and whining. 

5. He did not use protection. (She did get tested when she got home and she is fine-TDB) He never asked her about her life or showed any interest in getting to know her at all. 

6. The butt of the story. Yes, Zak loves butt and wanted to do anal really bad but she said no she wouldn’t do that butttttttttttttttt he did eat out her butt. (que those spitting out their tea right now-TDB) 

7.  They went to the museum a lot but he never introduced her to anyone. She had to do that herself since it felt like she was one of many that he brought there so she introduced herself to those there. She felt like they were giving her looks like “oh here is another young girl that Zak brought to work today” Kinda like show and not tell. 

8. He talked badly about exes including Tay (the fitness girl) stating she was really into herself and he couldn’t take it anymore so he eventually ended it. (Now we know it went on a little longer than we thought so definitely Ashley/Tay were cross overs for a while. Sorry Ash if you are ready this. -TDB) He did mention about Tana and showed her IG page to the girl, but didn’t speak badly of her. (That is freakin’ odd-TDB)

9. The timing of her Zak weekend is a possible crossover with him “dating” Holly. He did proposition the girl recently while he did his last trip so yeah Zak is still out there “prowling” while “dating” Holly. (Sucks to be almost 40 and Zak is boinking those 18-22 eating their butts like a hungry wolf -TDB)

10. The weekend in her opinion was not fun and they barely hooked up more than a couple of times. Zak kept saying he “didn’t feel good” or was tired and that is why he didn’t put effort into it. (We all know Zak never makes an effort so he gives that line - TDB) However, when Zak wanted to have sex he was demanding and of course directing her on what he wanted her to do. (annoying- TDB) 

11. He did mention Detroit and how horrible his life was there and if he hadn’t moved then he would be in jail or caught up in other bad things. (We all know he did spend time briefly in jail. - TDB) He mentioned that he doesn’t drink or do drugs since he had a problem with it in the past. She did think it was weird he had a full bar though! Other than that he talked about himself, the show, and the museum. BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

12. She stated that he IS a huge GERMAPHOBIC (Yeah but eats butts who knew? - TDB) and it was super annoying. He also is a huge HYPOCHONDRIAC and he wouldn’t even walk into certain places in the museum if under construction without freaking out that he was ingesting glue fumes. (I know this is so true. He freaks out if anyone sneezes around him and will ask you a zillion times if you are sick - TDB) The feeling that she got as well is Zak is afraid to age or have an aging body. 

Overall, she had the weekend and moved on from it but she cringes thinking about the Holly crossover, his proposition while recently on the trip while dating Holly, the boring weekend, lackluster sex and that who Zak is in real life. 

EDIT: CLARIFICATION

Just to clarify something as I am getting flooded with DM’s asking me my insight about why he doesn’t use protection. Zak does use protection (condoms) but I have noticed its with the older generation of women. My theory is based on hundreds under 25 that have stated no protection and those over that age that said he did use condoms. In his warped mind they are young and haven’t been “around the block” so more likely safe from diseases. That is just my take on it all! - TDB

#zakbagans #dirtyblog #zak bagans #ghostadventures #ghost adventures #submission #thedirtyblog #dirty blog #the dirty blog #[email protected]

[movienotesbyzawmer]

October 21: Friday the 13th Part 3

(previous notes: Friday the 13th Part 2)

We're on a journey, you and I; a journey through the first eight Friday the 13th movies. And now we're at the only one that I actually saw in the theater! I was 11 when this came out, and I asked my dad to take me and a friend to see it in 3D. I remember mostly being excited about all the cool older kids that were in the crowd, plus also not being at all disappointed in the overall experience of cinematic violence.

And now I'm going to see it for the first time since then… and sure enough, I have it in 3D! I wonder if on my deathbed when I'm doing a mental inventory of my lifetime of experiences, if I will realize that I saw Friday the 13th Part 3 twice, both times in 3D. Will I wish I had the 2D experience at least once? Will I wonder if my life might have been different it… okay I'll shut up and watch it now, here goes…

Oh yeah, it does kind of suck to try taking notes while wearing the 3D glasses. Good thing this is just a Friday the 13th movie.

There is a card at the very start saying that the ladies and gentlemen of the audience must wear the glasses even though it won't be 3D right away!

Same director as the second one. He went on to do pretty successful non-horror movies, as I recall. The writer and director of the first movie weren't involved in any of the sequels at all, right?

Oh, the reason the beginning isn't in 3D is because it's a rehash of the end of the last movie. I wonder if they'll make it so that that ending sucks less. That's what I would do.

It's not even edited down, it's just the whole entire end of the last movie…

…oh, except, no, there is a new shot of Jason skulking away! And now the credits have started and there is a rockin' new theme, and I actually remember kind of thinking the rockin' theme was cool.

OMG the 3D here is going to be a huge problem. It is 3D, but it's broken. You know how when you look at a 3D thing without the glasses and there's the double vision thing? It's like I'm seeing the 3D effect AND the double vision. Am I supposed to have 50s-style red/blue glasses? I don’t have those. This is terrible to look at and despite everything I've noted above I am not going to watch it in 3D after all. (I tested another 3D Blu-ray and it looked fine so this is clearly just a shitty Blu-ray product. Oh well.)

The first scene after the credits is playfully doing 3D effects at us which I now cannot experience. Woe. Woe is me.

Woman in curlers is watching the story of the last movie as a news story on TV while worrying about a lurker outside. She's a little worried but she also realizes it's time to take the laundry in from the clotheslines.

Not even sure what the setting is here. The news reporter called the murders from the last one "the worst crime in local history".

The exposition has taught us about this couple who lives on this property that is a rabbit farm and a grocery store where the husband just grazes on the food. We know there's also a lurker! But there's also a snake in a rabbit cage that has mutilated a rabbit, and that snake jumps at the camera in some sort of Three Dimensional Effect! Plus also, lurker. Ch ch ch ch ch ha ha ha ha.

Husband checks a room and is butcher-knifed shockingly! These are not camp counselors. What did they do wrong. The wife gets killed quickly afterward, but with a different weapon, an arrow or something! Variety!

Now we're on some new characters. Fun lovin' young adults! One of them is a silly prankster who is insecure about his appearance. Will that play into the story later? Oh I hope so.

They all just arrived at a friend's house to pick them up for something. But uh oh… the van is on fire, look at the smoke! They are alarmed! But ha ha ha, no, it turns out there are hippies in the back of the van smoking grass ha ha! It’s their friends that had been deliberately a secret from us until this moment.

A merry Cheech/Chong scene ensues where they think the police are on their tail so they all have to swallow the drugs! But the police just pass them and it was all for nothing ha ha.

Unlike the first two movies, this Blu-ray transfer is riddled with marks and flaws.

The next tale in this saga, this veritable Odyssey, involves an old man lying on the road, obstructing their van trip. What is wrong with him! It turns out he's crazy; he is the sequel to the crazy old man from the first two movies. He is holding an eyeball maybe, and he tells them that his handheld eyeball means he has to warn them about doom or whatever. It doesn’t look like an eyeball. I am watching this movie.

The place they are at is some kind of ranch, not even a summer camp I don't think, but Chris, who it seems like might be the main girl, is reacquainting herself with a house on the premises that is adorned with many paintings. Maybe I missed where they explained who they are and what this place is, but it seems like they're just a bunch of young people who are spending a weekend at this ranch place where Chris used to hang out or live.

Insecure Guy played a trick which resulted in the 48th fakeout of the movie so far, he makes it look like he's been hatcheted, but it was just some clownin' with gore makeup. The dialogue is very, very unnatural.

Um, an incident just occurred at the grocery store! A different grocery store from where the opening murders happened. Insecure Guy was there with a friend, and some TUFFS show up to make trouble! They bully our protagonists and make them feel bad! That ends with Insecure Guy running over their motorcycles in a heroic moment for him. His character has a complex arc!

The TUFFS broke the windshield of the car, and all the characters are oddly tolerant of that.

The TUFFS apparently tracked our heroes to the ranch and are there to get some revenge. They gotta even the score! They're going to do that by siphoning gas from that stoner van apparently. But the TUFF that is a girl decides to go exploring. And someone we can't see is watching her! Hey, what kind of movie is this anyway? She is unnaturally amused by the various props on display in the barn she's exploring. She is so pleased with her decision to go exploring.

But she hears a noise! In the barn she has trespassed into! She decides to vigilantly investigate! But a moment later we see that she noticed the rope that hangs from the side of the barn and she swings on it. She is delighted! "This feels good", she actually exclaims while just swinging a little bit on a rope. I'm not sure the writers of this movie have ever met a person.

One of the TUFFS goes after her and finds her pitchforked! Then he gets pitchforked! Then the last remaining TUFF goes in there to investigate, having executed the masterful chess move of stealing gas out of the van, and gets in a fight with an assailant whose face we can't see, but who appears to have clean, pressed slacks. The last TUFF gets clubbed real good.

Insecure Guy tries to tell a pretty girl that he likes her. She responds by saying "no. I’m going to go outside for a little while, and when I come back inside, we'll talk." That's really how that exchange went. Have you ever been in an exchange like that.

We're on Chris now, and she's finally spilling the tea about her past. It turns out she was attacked by a grotesque man with a knife in the woods near her house. Just some mysterious man with a bad face. It ended with her losing consciousness and waking up with just that story which was apparently unbelievable to her parents. Glad we got to the bottom of that. Do you think this is a true story.

The way they're showing the killer makes him less scary than in the other movies. You see it's a male adult that has clean clothes and a casual, confident gait. We can't see his head at all but what we can see is well lit. Sometimes it's a fakeout because it isn't really the killer. But sometimes it is. Like just now the stoners went to investigate a mysterious noise in the barn. They don't find anything, but we see the killer, from the chest down, seeing them. Ch ch ch ch! Ha ha ha ha!

I think we just saw the first appearance of the hockey mask! Insecure Guy played another devious jape upon the pretty girl he was hoping to woo - she's sitting on a dock and he grabs at her ankle from underwater! Wearing a hockey mask. For some reason. He had a mask earlier, but it was a different one. Maybe his identity is "mask guy". Because in a way are not we all Mask Guy.

Jason, I guess, just killed that girl with a spear gun while wearing the hockey mask! It was a 3D gimmick death. Shot her right in the eye. I think when they had their first meeting about making this movie they just said "okay, let's just make a list of some different murder weapons and send it over to Fred, he'll write it up as a screenplay."

One of the guys just got macheted! I think I do remember that from before because he was a handstand walker-arounder and he was walking on his hands when Jason came upon him and swung the machete down between his legs! It didn't actually show it, but you know how he got sliced and ow.

That guy's girlfriend was in the shower when that happened, and when she comes out, she is distracted when she comes upon a very enticing issue of Fangoria magazine. They're in a bubble, the makers of this movie.

But that scene ends with her seeing her dead boyfriend in pieces above her in the rafters, and they are very gory pieces, and then she gets bowie-knifed from under the hammock as she's laying in it! Many deaths. Oh, the many deaths.

We didn't see Insecure Guy get killed; we only assume he's dead because Jason has the hockey mask now.

Oh, I had just typed that when Insecure Guy arrives at the stoner girl's door with a slashed throat. She doesn't believe it's real because he is such a fooler. Plus also maybe because it's not a very good gore effect by any standards. Suddenly her boyfriend is getting killed somewhere else in a manner that has to do with an electrical box, it all happened so fast! Then she herself gets run through with a hot poker! Jason is being very diligent about killing each victim in a different way.

Pretty sure all that's left now is Chris and her boyfriend, who were off somewhere talking about her terrible experience with a grotesque man. They are returning now, and we will soon see them realize that they are in a world of murder! murder! murder!

The boyfriend has a very square jaw. One of the squarest, really.

The most Hitchcock-y shot so far - Chris is looking out the front door and calling out for Square Jaw… she can't see him but we can, around the corner, being muzzled by Jason just out of her view! Then she goes back inside and Jason just squishes his head with his hands! Eyeball pops out and it is 3D. Unless it isn't, which in this case is what it is(n't).

Chris is exploring the campus trying to get some answers, and the body of one of the TUFFS is suddenly dangled in front of her from like a tree branch or something. Then she goes inside and wonders what oh what will become of her, and Square Jaw's body is hurled through the window. Each movie has multiple instances of bodies getting inexplicably thrown through windows and suddenly dangling out of the sky at just the right time for it to be scary.

She comes upon Jason in the house and they tussle! She stabs him in the leg with a knife that she extracted from a body that was conveniently nearby! He pulls it out and throws it at her with Olympic-caliber precision, but she still gets away.

She runs to the van and has the keys and starts it up even! Drives away and everything! But it runs out of gas so she literally just runs back to the ranch. Like, "back to the drawing board" I guess.

I can't stress enough how odd and disappointing it is that Jason just walks and dresses like a normal man, other than the fact that above the neck he is disguised by the mask. He doesn't limp or lurch or hunch, and again, he has clothes that, while plain, are oddly presentable for someone who is some kind of supernatural homicidal forest hermit.

Here now is another thing I remember from seeing this in Actual Nineteen Eighty Two; Jason's hanging from this pulley thing where she thinks she has him killed or immobilized or something, and he be-s alive at her, and even lifts up the mask to show his grotesque face! It's so that she can realize that he's the same guy that attacked her in the woods in the story she told from several years earlier.

He's about to get her… but one of the TUFFS is not dead, and emerges to fight Jason. That ends badly for the TUFF, he gets de-handed and just beaten down badly, but meanwhile Chris axes Jason in the head.

And here is what happens the next morning to blow our minds at the end of this movie. She has gotten in a canoe to get a good night's sleep. All tuckered out, time to hit the canoe, right? Then in the morning she wakes up in the canoe and spots Jason with a big head wound from her axe, he's just looking at her through a window of the house. He's totally going to come get her. But instead of him getting her, a lady emerges from the lake and pulls her in! It's maybe Jason's mother? But she's all ghoulish so we don't really know. Seems like that's the same sweater though. But also, her head is attached to her body, whereas the movie began by very clearly reminding us that Mom's severed head is a cabin somewhere else. But anyway, just like in the first movie, the consequence of that surprise waterborne attack is that she is being cared for by paramedics a little later, all confused.

This is a bad movie! So bad! From this team I expected so much this exact thing.

(next: Friday the 13th - The Final Chapter)

#friday the 13th

[thegirlwhorunswithwinchesters]

Request: “#88 with Dean + ‘reader locks themselves in their room’.” by @justanotherwinchester​

Prompt: “Can you just leave?” - “I’m not going anywhere until you talk to me.”

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word count: 1.7K

Warnings: Angst, mentions of blood and ‘lady problems’, misplaced embarrassment, and fluff to save the day/night

A/N: If I’m being totally honest, the dialogue completely took over in this one. But hey, who am I to go against it when a fic decides to start writing itself? Hope you enjoy (:

Beta: @bookshido​ and @slytherkins​

JJ’s Rockin’ 100 - RULES || MASTERLIST || ASK BOX

(gif)

Despite the fact that there was a wooden barrier separating the two of you, it still felt like Dean was looking right at you from the other side. You turned your back to the chipped paint of the door and faced the unoriginal design of your motel room instead. Perhaps that would help you not to think of the man outside, trying to come in.

You had locked the door, of course. But you had hunted with the Winchesters long enough to know that, if they wanted to get into a locked room or house, they'd find a way. Some methods were more subtle than others, but they all worked in the end.

An impatient knock on your door dragged you out of your thoughts and back into the reality that was your burning red cheeks and your desperate boyfriend calling your name.

"Y/N, open up." Dean had stopped knocking but he was clearly not ready to leave yet. "You don't have to be upset. Just talk to me."

Upset wasn't quite the right word for what you were feeling in that moment. 'Mortified' would be more like it. Or perhaps 'utterly embarrassed'. From the moment you saw the stain, your heart had sunk to your stomach and it had yet to find its way back up to your chest.

It had been such a great night. You were in good spirits, driving back to the motel after having gone to a local bar to celebrate another successfully finished hunt. Sam had left early, mumbling something about how he hadn't slept in days. Which left you and Dean to entertain each other by telling crazy stories and buying more rounds.

Things were great between the two of you. At first, your friends-to-lovers cliché had been a bit of a challenge. You tested the waters, took it slow in case either of you wanted to go back to the way things used to be. Soon, however, you both realized you were meant to be together, so that's where you stayed.

Looking back at what happened in the car, you figured the alcohol in your blood was probably to blame for you not noticing what was happening sooner. It wasn't until you got out of the car and turned around to grab your bag that you saw it.

Right in the middle of the passenger seat of Dean's most beloved possession, bright red on the smooth leather, was your blood. It wasn't a small stain either.

The time it took Dean to catch up on what was going on had been enough to give you the opportunity to make a run for the motel room you shared with him. Now, you were locked inside. But unfortunately, despite the fact that that simultaneously locked Dean out, it couldn't keep the shame you felt away as well.

"Can you just leave?" Your voice was hesitant. Probably because you knew it wasn't fair for you to deny Dean access. It was his room too. Yet, you had already taken the liberty of deciding for him that he could take the couch in Sam's room until your cheeks had stopped burning and you were ready to face him.

Dean, however, seemed more than ready to face you right now. "I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me."

You let out a groan and resisted the urge to slam your head against the door. "Just leave," you pleaded again. "I'm going to take a shower and go to bed. Can we talk in the morning? Please?"

"Y/N, come on, I-"

"Goodnight, Dean," you cut him off. "I'm sorry." You grabbed your pajamas from your duffel and headed for the bathroom. With every step you took, you felt the sticky wetness in your panties and jeans. It made you want nothing more than a nice long hot shower.

Unfortunately, the motel shower was crap. There was barely any water pressure and the temperature never seemed quite right, until it just turned ice cold all together. You were still shivering when you left the bathroom, wearing your most comfortable fluffy pajamas that usually made you feel a bit better. Tonight, it did little to calm your nerves.

Because you were still drying your hair while entering the room, the towel blocked your view from the figure sitting on the bed. Dean cleared his throat, making you jump.

"A double lock, really?" he said while raising an eyebrow. "Who exactly do you think I am? Some kind of amateur?" He was right, of course. All you knew about lock picking, you had learned from this guy.

"Dean, I... I'm sorry." The words had left your lips before you even really knew what you were apologizing for.

"No, I'm sorry." Dean got up from the bed and walked over to you. His eyes stood wary, as if he expected you to bolt again at any moment. You were definitely thinking about it. Sometimes you hated how he knew you better than you knew yourself.

"Why are you apologizing?" you asked, clearly confused. You had lowered the towel and was now fumbling with it between your fingers.

Dean shook his head and he suddenly looked angry. Disappointed. "Because apparently I have said or done something that made you think you have to be embarrassed about this kind of stuff.”

That’s when you understood. You were beating yourself up about this, and Dean was doing the same to himself. Maybe he knew you this well because the two of you were so much alike.

“Dean, it’s not that you’ve…” You sighed, trying to think of the best way to explain your thoughts. “I don’t know. It’s just that we never really talk about this kind of stuff. Lady stuff. Sam, he has experience, but you-“

“Sam menstruates? I knew it!” He looked at you with a blank expression but you knew he was joking. He had to be.

It wasn’t until you heard yourself laugh that you realized what he was doing. Because as soon as your laugh sounded through the room, Dean was grinning from ear to ear, looking extremely proud and content while he sat back down on the bed.

“You know what I mean,” you said, walking closer to him. “He’s been in a long-term serious relationship before, but you…” You bit your lip as you searched for the right words.

Dean decided to help you out a little. “I took a little longer to find the perfect fit,” he finished for you. “And now that I have found the woman who can find it in her heart to love an idiot like me back almost as much as I love her, I’m not gonna let her push me away for wrongfully feeling embarrassed about the natural way her body works. Not even for one night.”

You were stunned by the words coming out of Dean’s mouth. This wasn’t like him at all. He always steered clear of what he called these ‘chick flick moments’.

The towel you were holding now completely dropped to the floor when you moved into his lap. You straddled him, wrapping your arms around him to pull him close. He immediately wrapped you up in his strong arms as well, taking in a deep breath of your shampoo while he buried his face in your hair.

“Do you think the stain’s gonna wash out?” you whispered carefully. You didn’t want to ruin the moment but you knew how much that car meant to Dean.

“Nope,” Dean responded immediately, popping his ‘p’. “Gonna have to get rid of the whole thing.”

You froze in his arms. If Dean hadn’t been holding you so tightly, you would have jolted upright.

“I’m kidding,” he grinned, nuzzling your cheek, his lips at your ear. “Don’t you think Baby’s had her fair share of bloodstains over the years with Sammy and I going on so many hunts? I got this. And if not, we’ll see. Those seats are replaceable. That beautiful smile of yours is not. I don’t like it being washed away by unnecessary worries.”

You inhaled a deep breath yourself and decided to take Dean’s words to heart. It wasn’t long until you felt your worries fade. That was the effect Dean’s touch and presence always seemed to have on you.

The two of you sat there in silence for a while, just listening to each other’s breathing. Until you suddenly pulled back to look at Dean with a serious look on your face.

“Not ‘almost’,” you said with a tone of voice that made it sound like the matter was life or death.

Dean frowned, looking a little worried again. “Huh?”

“You said that I love you almost as much as you love me,” you explained. “That’s not true. I love you just as much, if not more.”

Dean’s frown disappeared and instead a look of adoration popped up within a millisecond. “Of course, sweetheart. You’re right. My apologies.”

A satisfied grin rested on your lips as you nestled yourself into his arms again. “You were right about the idiot part, though,” you teasingly mumbled under your breath.

Your body shook when, beneath you, Dean’s chest rumbled with laughter. “All right, off to bed with you.” He stood up, easily holding you against him with one hand underneath you as your legs firmly wrapped around his waist.

Before he pulled the covers back, he made sure to grab your towel from the floor and place it on your side of the mattress. Once you were lying down, he made quick work of discarding his clothes and climbing into bed with you.

It didn’t take you long to start drifting off. You barely even felt the pulsing cramps in your lower abdomen. Dean held you tight as if he knew. With your head on his chest, you listened to his breathing to steady your own. You were drawn into a peaceful sleep not long after.

#JJ's fics #JJR100 #dean x reader #supernatural #spn drabble #angst #fluff #dean winchester #dean winchester drabble #spnfanficpond

[stedes-black-bonnet]

My Baby Does Me: Chapter 4

POV: John Deacon x reader

Notes: Let me know if you want on my tag list?? I’ve had a couple people ask to be added. Ongoing Queen fic and such, expect updates weekly, if not more frequently.

Warnings: Drinking, swearing, and some steamy AF cupboard action? Does all of Queen appearing (finally!) in this chapter count as warning-worthy??

Abstract: A child’s game is played, though several people win at games not everyone knew were being played.

You weren’t sure exactly what Roger Taylor was offering, and you weren’t entirely sure you wanted to turn him down; if it weren’t for the enigmatic, dancing God standing next to the blond God, you might have a hard time resisting the glamorous Roger. Your heart was already spoken for, even if you hadn’t realized it yet. Roger put an arm around Deacy’s waist. He had to admit, Deacy had delectable taste in women. The kind of women that tended to go after his friend, however, weren’t always the kind of woman Deacy was looking for. He wasn’t strictly a one woman a night kinda guy; that wasn’t to say Deacy didn’t like to have his fun or indulge his base desires, rather that he was a bit more choosy than most about the women he invited along for the ride. Roger respected this the most about his friend. And even though he’d never admit it, he admired him even more for his discerning palate and all-encompassing self-control.

They could get whatever they wanted when they wanted it, Roger thought. Perhaps the most chaotic thing about Deacy was his ability to simultaneously flaunt that fact and yet outright deny it; turning away from limitless lechery and immediacy was perhaps the ultimate form of Deacy’s rebellious chaotic energy. He could allure anyone and say no in the same breath. Roger, however, rarely said no, considered seduction his favorite hobby--besides his cars and his drums. He was maybe a cad, but he never took advantage; Roger Taylor always knew where to draw the line, and if that line was the curve of a woman’s body, even better.

He hoped you were capable of dealing with Deacy’s complexities, because from the look in his friend’s eyes, Roger could tell Deacy was falling in such a way he was probably already writing songs about you in his head. He hated the idea of seeing his friend get hurt again. Roger was all fire and every emotion was always plastered on his fine face; if you could read a book, you could interpret his face and his feelings; Deacy felt everything startlingly deeply, and even though he trusted the members of Queen above all, there were times he’d rather run away for weeks than tell them what was wrong. Could you be the exception?

“That depends,” you said, “What kind of game are you playing?” A wry smile had appeared on your face. You were feeling the alcohol a bit more, and felt braver because of it. You looked at Deacy, and had a hard time not thinking about what it would feel like to kiss him in this room full of witnesses. To claim him publicly would be the most fantastic move, you thought. Not to mention a huge turn on for you. You tried to put it in the back of your mind next to your thoughts of pressing him up against a wall and running your hands all the way down his torso.

There was a faraway look in your eyes Deacy couldn’t help but find intriguing and exquisite. That, he thought, was the perfect word to describe you: exquisite.

“I have an idea what you’re playing.” Deacy said, “You and Freddie really can’t help yourselves, and you’ve enlisted Y/N’s friend, and now you’re trying to enlist us to be party to your...foreplay adventure.”

“I would never say ‘foreplay adventure.’” Roger simpered. He licked his lips, and looked at you, “Listen: we’re simple men who play scrabble for fun for fuck’s sake. And what we’re doing now is equally childish, yet a rockin’ blast of a time.”

“Oh yes! Sardines is without qualification a ‘rockin’ blast of a time.’” Jim laughed sardonically.

“Wait--you’re playing reverse hide-and-seek?” You asked somewhat gleefully.

“What of it, love?” Roger asked, an eyebrow raised.

“Let me get this straight--”

Jim snorted into his cocktail, and the boys smiled at him fondly.

“Let me get this straight,” you repeated shaking your head a Jim, a full-on smile on your face, “You’re adult rock-stars playing sardines?”

“Come now, this is a time-old romantic tradition dating back to the Victorian Era.” Roger explained, rather scholarly, you thought.

“God save the Queens.” Deacy said automatically.

“God save the Queens,” Jim responded. You had the distinct feeling Jim was talking about one Queen in particular, and that this call and response was a typical exchange of the group you had become part of.

Deacy removed himself from Rog’s grip, and offered you his hand. You took it, allowing him to help you up. Standing next to him for the first time, you noticed how tall he was, and were instantly relieved you had the foresight to wear heels tonight. You’d still have to stand on your tiptoes to kiss him properly, you guessed.

“Look at it this way,” Deacy pulled you closer to him, staring into your eyes the entire time, “games of proximity are significantly better as adults.”

You smiled at each other knowingly, as if you had been exchanging hidden messages since childhood. It was clear to you now, maybe for the first time tonight, Deacy wanted to get you alone, to experience you by himself, a room all your own. Perhaps, this was the ultimate test for any two people, to survive the tedious one-on-one for the first time. To bypass all the pitfalls and emerge for the better and wanting to know each other better wasn’t always easy or simple. You knew, however, you wanted nothing more than to find out if you were compatible in every sense of the word.

“You’d have to find me, first.” You challenged.

“I could find you in a room full of darkness, you gleam that brightly for me.”

Dumbstruck, you felt that newly familiar sensation of time pausing again. It was such a line, you thought, but there was something about the genuine way he said it, the slight shyness, the undercurrent of embarrassment that showed you he felt flabbergasted saying it, too. Maybe it was audacity of the audience, or the fact you had known each other for hardly an hour, barely knew anything about each other, but whatever it was, it wasn’t just a line for him, because you knew the last thing he wanted was to show bad judgment. Statements, lines like that can seem like a game, something a player would say to get his way, or show the emotional hand of someone who rushes into relationships too quickly. The way he said it, the mixed emotions, however, conveyed what the words couldn’t: he was saying this against his better judgement precisely because he couldn’t help himself. Another paradox, you thought.

“Another paradox,” you whispered.

For Deacy, you had said the magic word. He knew you understood him better in these brief minutes than most had his entire life.      

Roger cleared his throat, “Mates, you’re supposed to be helping me find Lydia. Keep your baseline in your pants.”

“You’re one to talk, Rog.” Jim came around the bar, determined to help in the search. “Pretty sure you’re up for action any day, action any night.”

Roger glared at Jim.

“Right,” Deacy said. “Let’s do this.” You nodded in agreement, and let go of Deacy’s hand.

“Alright, you all know the rules? We all split up and search for Lydia, and when we find her, hide with her until the last one of us comes a long and is declared the loser. Now, keep in mind Bri and Freddie are already playing. I lost track of them, oh, I don’t know, thirty minutes ago? They could be anywhere.”

“I like a challenge.” You said, clapping your hands together.

“Did Freddie start playing before or after the chandelier?” Jim asked Roger.

“...Well, during.” Roger confessed hesitantly.

Jim closed his eyes in gentle frustration, “Thanks for the hint,” he said, and quickly zipped off among the throng of people, deciphering something in Roger’s words only one’s lover could understand.

You lost track of him rather fast, and amused yourself imagining Jim sneaking off into a secret passage like film noir detective.

Deacy wanted to just whisk you away, use this game as an opportunity to get you alone, but he was also competitive and liked to win. He was torn. Part of this game was deception and distraction and knowing your prey. He was contemplating the best tactic when he noticed you had left his side slyly and without sound or word. Surprised, he smiled at your initiative. He took it as a personal challenge, endearing him to your spirit even more than before.

“Hey, hold this for me, mate?” Rog said, handing Deacy a balloon he had fumbled down from over the bar. “Right,” Deacy said holding the string.

That’s when Roger popped the balloon, and made sweet his own ostentatious getaway.

Deacy stood at the bar, quite alone in a room full of people, still holding the string to the popped balloon, “Right.” He repeated.

You were in the room you had most wanted to enter since you arrived at the party. A glorious white grand piano rested in the center of the room. Vast, rich red curtains hung from the bay windows circling the exterior. A spiral staircase was off in the corner of the room, almost hidden, certainly meant to be ignored. What was it like to live in a place where something as inherently fancy as a spiral staircase was commonplace?

The ceiling looked like a renaissance painting, though you were certain some of the angelic figures were, indeed, of cats and not cherubs. You smiled at the adorable yet bizarre tribute to the fine feline kind. Only Freddie, you thought. Unless this was Jim’s dramatic touch? You thought better of it; only a rock-star would do this to their ceiling. You wondered what it would be like to compose rock songs at this piano, in this space, in this townhouse. Down the rabbit hole, indeed, you echoed Jim’s words from earlier. Especially in this room, they rang true. You couldn’t bring yourself to touch the piano without permission, though you longed to sit and play, perhaps to entertain, maybe to show off.

Instead, you checked behind the curtains for Lydia. She wasn’t there, though. You decided to not go back the way you came, but to use the inexplicably curving, tight staircase that led up towards the cat-painted ceiling, and off along towards an indoor balcony. You weren’t sure exactly yet where it led, but couldn’t resist the urge to find out. You ascended the staircase and followed the balcony along into another room. You found yourself on the second floor over a modest library. If a two-story library could be called modest, that is. Large ferns took advantage of the floor to ceiling windows resting between the shelves. You wondered who the gardener was who took painstakingly good care of them.

You wandered between the nooks and crannies, between large and small plants, in dark crevices, and patterned curtains made of kimonos. There was another staircase leading up (how many floors did this place have?) and a doorway leading to a widow's walk, and beyond that only darkness. Shadowy figures were outside the widow’s walk. Maybe one was Lydia and the others?

Opening the door, you ran into someone leaving.

“Oh, pardon me, will you?” He asked, lightly. He was distracted, maybe on a mission of his own?

You looked up at him, and saw a mop of curly long hair. You recognized, with and in-take of breath, Brian May.

“Oh, wow!” you whispered. “I mean, of course--excuse me, I was just looking for my friend; we’re playing a game.” You explained. You couldn’t believe you were talking to Brian May, about a stupid game, when he was in all actuality quite brilliant.

A look of recognition sprang to life on his ultimately kindly face. The smile made Brain absolutely beautiful. It had to be said, he had better hair than anyone you had ever met, including Lydia. Those luscious brown curls, you wondered, how did he keep them so tame? You must remember to ask for tips. Hair tips from Brian May, you really were losing it.

You took in his red and black Henley and silver blazer. He looked classical, relaxed, you thought. And so very tall. Taller than Deacy. You thought then of Deacy and where he was, if he had won yet, and thought of finding him in a dark corner, and what you would do to him if you did. The possibilities were endless.

“You must be Y/N!” Brian said grinning.

His words shook you from your reverie. This rock-star, who played guitar better than any living person in the world, knew your name.

“I am,” you managed to say. You put your hand out for him to shake. Brian took it happily, and he introduced himself. “I think we’re playing the same game, if I’m not mistaken?”

“We are,” he agreed a little bemusedly.

“We must part ways, then,” you said somewhat sadly; Brian seemed, well there was no other word for it, sweet. Maybe genuine was a better way to put it, you thought? You smiled at him and said, “I hope we have the opportunity to learn more about each other outside the cunning nature of sardines.”

Brain laughed at your remark. He liked a woman with a brain. Being a scientist himself, he valued the simple skills of observation and logic. Also, however, being an artist, he admired beauty. Women were like stars for him, each had their own beauty, their own signature, a little something that made them all different and appealing in a myriad of ways. Gazing at stars, for Brain, was like gazing a women: equal parts dangerous and beguiling. A woman could sear your eyes, tarnish your skin, yet envelope you entirely in light and warmth. This, is the essence of pleasure, Brain thought. And, like every other woman, you were very pleasing.

“I’m sure we will have the chance.” Brain smiled as he left back the way you had come through the library. You, however, continued past the widow’s walk to a doorway at the end of a medieval-looking hallway. You opened the door and walked inside. A guest bedroom in pinks and oranges met your gaze. Light mewing and tired sighs could be heard from the canopied bed. You tiptoed past the bed, not wanting to disturb the cats--seven in all, you counted? A second doorway led to another hallway with six different doors leading all of six different ways.

Dear lord, you thought. Did this place ever end? You wished Brain hadn’t left you alone. You were a stranger in a strange land. Before you could worry too much, one of the doors started opening, and you wished for a place to hide. You had five options, and couldn’t choose one. You found yourself frozen to the spot, a little too curious about who could be coming through the doorway.

Deacy opened the door and saw, much to his surprise and elation, you.

“Y/N?” He said into the darkness.

“Deacy!” You practically sprang into his arms with relief. It felt as if you had already done it a hundred times before. You felt Deacy’s body seize briefly and then instantly relax. He slowly snaked his arms around your waist and up your back. He was very cliche of warmth and you felt duly undeniably safe. He was a shield in the night.

Deacy couldn’t resist any longer. He had been fighting a silent battle all night. The one against his mind and his heart. That old battle, more a foe than a friend; for we are always our own worst enemies, are we not, he thought? And, really, when you got down to it, he was no different than anyone else. Sure, he was famous and wealthy, but some problems you couldn’t charm away, you couldn’t buy off. Some problems all men had to face.

This fight always ended one of two ways: the heart would win or the mind. He could stop himself, maybe, he thought, if he turned tail and retreated now. If he left you here in this dark hallway, he could continue to guard himself, to lock himself away. Seal away vulnerability once and for all, and give up. Or, alternatively, he could let go. He could succumb to every thought, to every wish he had silently expressed since he noticed you entering the party with Lydia.

That’s when Deacy let go.

He moved his hands down your arms to take your hands in his, and he turned to the left, knowingly, and led you into another room you had yet to see.

It was, you thought, a pantry of some kind. Close-quartered, but not too cramped. In here, in the darkness alone, you would have been afraid. But with Deacy it was an adventure, a beginning. Deacy turned around and snapped the door closed by pushing you up against it. He didn’t ask to kiss you, which you liked. You hated it when people asked to kiss you. It was, you thought, their own insecure way of not really knowing if they wanted to kiss you in the first place. If you have to ask to kiss someone, one of you doesn’t want it, and your intuition is giving you a red flag.

Deacy ran his hungry fingers up your waist, past your breasts, up your neck, pulling you into an exigent kiss. His lips pressed against yours with skill and determination. You responded immediately by wrapping your arms around his waist, one reaching up his back into his coiled hair. Softer to the touch than you had expected. Even the texture of his hair excited you; you had it bad. You smiled as the kiss lengthened, parting your lips.

His lips caressed yours, parting in equal measure and excitement. There was a rhythm to his kissing, you thought. Longer ones followed by softer and shorter ones, passion on top of passion, building to breath and repeats of long crescendos. Every peak would push a bit further than before, before de-escalating to a plateau. Each break made you desperately cling to him and him to you. You kept bringing back each kiss, each feel of the hands, each everything was new, nothing done before, each movement a furthering symphony of ecstasy.

Deacy deftly slid his tongue into your mouth, tracing your tongue. He pulls back, ever so briefly, lightly nibbling your bottom lip, and you moan in response. There is music in it notes know not.

That’s when Deacy decides he could happily make you moan forever and be perfectly, permanently in a state of joy. “Moan again, for me?” He asks, punctuating each word with a kiss or a touch, “I’ll make it worth your while…” He’s curious what other sounds you could make together; he wants to find every sound you make and catalog them into a score, a song that can mean only you, that only you can make together.

You manage a sigh, looking into his grey eyes, you pull him into your kiss. Your hands pull him by the waistband of his jeans, fingers digging into the coarse fabric; it is a dirty gesture done every so innocently. You slink your tongue into his mouth this time, moaning all the while. As you lose track of time, you lose track of which hands are yours and which are his, as if you already belonged to each other. He lassos his arms around you, into your hair, holding your face. Your tongues circle each other in a delighted syncopation. You follow and flow with each other’s lips. You feel him getting harder with each kiss, and wonder how on earth he’s containing himself in those tight jeans of his.

He pulls away, moaning. Bodies still up against each other, he knows he wants more. But he also always wants to wait, to savor these moments and delay sex as long as possible; that was, after all, part of the fun for him. But, before he stopped altogether, he had one more parting shot, one final move to impress upon you how much he desired you.

Deacy, placing a hand on your face, and another cradling one of your breasts, leaned down, and licked up from your decolletage, up your neck, all the way to the tip of your chin. He felt you shiver in his grasp.

Gasping, you felt every pore, every slice of skin his tongue touched ablaze with a keen desire. You wanted him, all of him, right there. Instantly, you knew without a doubt you needed him past this moment, past this night, past every night, maybe. It was a ridiculous notion, you had just met, but this ultimate need, this yearning was the most powerful feeling you had ever come across. And you never wanted it to end.

“I am not sure,” you said, “how you expect me to go back out there as wet as I am for you right now.”

The flashing in his eyes was a need you had never seen on another person.

He wasn’t sure if what you said was sexier than what you had done thus far, or even what he figured you would and could do for each other. He almost let go again, almost giving in to your skilled seduction.

“Y/N, if we relent now, if we give into each other now, we will regret it.”

“I could never regret that.”

He smiled lightly, “it will be all the better for waiting,” he kissed you again, flicking his wrist to your hips, and traveling down your inner thighs.

“This,” you moan, as he dexterously searched, pressing his fingers to your clitoris, “doesn’t feel like waiting to me…”

“But it is; I promise,” he said, returning your moan, as you trailed a hand across his mostly perfectly erect penis. There it was again, an intimacy that knows clothes. You’ve never been so entirely turned on while having all your clothes on. Was this the beginnings of true intimacy? Of great compatibility? You weren’t sure yet, and for the first time during all this reasoned he was right: you should bide your time.

You gently removed your hands from him, pulling him towards you still with your kiss. He followed suit, and took his hands off your body. Attached at the lips, this was still the hottest moment of your sexually experienced life. Almost as if rehearsed, you ended your kiss at the same exact time.

You saw him in a different light now. A layer of uncertainty melted away; there were different ways to know people, you figured. After this event, you saw him with more transparency, more confidence. He was a song you were learning, and couldn’t stop humming. You wanted to pour over his score until you had it committed to memory. You wanted to know him note-perfect.

You stared at each other silently. You weren’t sure how long, all notions of sardines forgotten in this cupboard.

That was until someone else joined you with a bang, and a push, new hands on your shoulders, and a closing of a door.

“Deacy, darling, is that you?” The man said; his voice was crisp and undeniably alive. You looked to your left, and saw more than felt that he still had a comforting hand on your shoulder. He was wearing a cape, a crown, white hot-pants, and not much else. You’d recognize that mustache anywhere.

“Fuck me,” you said softly to Freddie Mercury.

Freddie looked you up and down, taking in your green dress, bright eyes, and chic hair. He liked your over-large glasses. There was something sly in your eyes he savored. Freddie flicked his eyes onto Deacy, who made a halfhearted attempt to hide his erection; no fool, Freddie knew what had been going on in here even without that particular hint. He raised a thick eyebrow at Deacy. That eyebrow said everything in one fluid movement.

Deacy knew Freddie would 1) never let him live this down, 2) demand later to know everything that had happened in here while simultaneously regaling him of other sexual encounters that had occurred in this pantry, 3) pry every detail about Y/N out of him, and 4) cheer you on relentlessly. Eyebrows could communicate a lot. At least, Deacy thought, if it had to be anyone who discovered this situation, it was Freddie.

Their connection was deeper than his to the others; Freddie, like him, was shy in his private life. He was deeply secretive, and cherished the times when he could be “normal” as much as the times he was on stage performing for thousands of people. They understood each other instinctively, which made them not only good friends but good collaborators. They were able to write songs together with ease and enjoyment. On stage, Freddie was the only one who made him feel free to dance and embrace the music without an ounce of shame. At times, he even looked forward to the times Freddie would wander over and grind up against him, dancing in their own unique ways to the music they created together. That, Deacy thought, was complete freedom. Freddie, on stage, a magician, the great pretender, brought out the best in everyone, including the band. Freddie was, if nothing else, also surprisingly discreet. Deacy knew he wouldn’t even have to ask for Freddie’s discretion; he’d just have it, like he’d always have Freddie’s friendship.

“Well, to be honest, Deacy dear,” Freddie simpered, “I expected to find Roger and his belle de jour in here, not you and this delicious beauty.”

“Rog is quite fond of cupboards,” Deacy grinned mischievously.

“A queen if i ever saw one,” Freddie sighed.

“Are you referring to Roger or Y/N here?” Deacy questioned straightening his button-down.

“Myself, of course!” Freddie chuckled extending his hand to you. “Y/N L/N,” you said smiling from ear to ear, shaking his hand.

“Freddie Mercury, an absolute pleasure to finally meet you, darling. I’ve heard so much about you, if it isn’t gauche to say so?”

What was tonight, you thought? How many rock-stars knew your name? How many were vying for your attention? And, well, that’s not not mention everything that had transpired in this cupboard with one John Deacon.

“Not at all! As long as what you’ve heard has been favorable--if not, i may have to do something unspeakably devious about it.”

“My husband has a very high opinion of you, actually.”

“Oh! Jim! I just am so taken with him. We’re getting lunch tomorrow.” You excitedly exclaim.

“Indeed! I find myself jealous. How about you, Deacy. Jealous of my dear husband and your...friend?”

“Jealous,” Deacy said with a wry smile, “Doesn’t even begin to touch my feelings, Fred.”

“Freddie?” you asked, remembering the game, one of many, you thought.

“Hmm?”

“Have you seen the others?”

“Oh! Well, to be honest, I was hiding from Jim because of the chandelier incident. Though, that man is the canniest; I’d suspect he and Brain would have found Lydia by now. Technically, I think we aren’t allowed to search for her together…” He sounded like a parent now, catching two children breaking an obvious rule.

You were loath to split away from Deacy again. This, Deacy could read on your face. He took your hand, placing something in it, and said, “Y/N, we will find each other again tonight, I promise.”

He left the pantry, determined to win more than just your heart.

You opened the palm of your hand to find a long string in it.

“What’s that?” Freddie asked.

“A distraction,” you said, looking at the closed door, with an impressed smirk.      

     Tag list: @phantom-fangirl-stuff @triggeredpossum        

#john deacon x reader #john deacon #roger taylor #brian may #freddie mercury #queen x reader #roger taylor x reader #bohemian rhapsody #rami malek #joe mazzello #ben hardy #gwilym lee #Queen

[oblivioustoast]

i was going back thru my tagsofthewhathaveyou posts and damn if they didn’t still make me laugh so now it’s time fooooorrrrrrr

Tags of the Week or Something Like It -

Greatest Hits!!!!

#Checkmate atheists

#i bet spooks hassle him all day trying to possess that rockin bod

#g spoot

#make sure to play it loud enough to hear in my coffin so i'll know my cue to kick it open

#*takes next train to garbage hell*

#HAS SCIENCE gonE TOOO FAR?????

#go big or go home as i never say

#so weird it almost seems like if you do something instead of nothing at all that results can be achieved

#do it. drink fire.

#I'm IN HeELL

#this better be good or I will kill everyone who's ever betrayed me

#so I ran him through with an axe.

#I had an idea for a script once.#It's basically Jaws except when the guys in the boat are going after Jaws#they look around and there's an even bigger Jaws#so the guys have to team up with Jaws to get Bigger Jaws#I call it Big Jaws#I already got a sequel in mind. It's called Way Bigger Jaws.

#y’all are pervs

#i want to tranquilize him#with my vagina

#CHROST

#DEAD TOM’S DEAD

#i round up to lesbian

#PLEASE DON’T LOOK IN THAT GUITAR CASE IT IS FILLED WITH SECRETS MOTHER

#hide this behaviour from your family in case they add it to their list of things to frown about

#The refreshing crunch of Sonic mpreg

#I'll date who I wanna date you hot potato chicken nugget ass double dipped bastard

#it’s like assassin’s creed but worthless and annoying

#i remember being angry the day i discovered the patella wasn't literally a little bowl that cradled your knee like a tiny leg helmet

#...............how to toothpaste

#having multiple heads and terrifyingly powerful visages must be hard for all of you

#Whatever the hell fucking time or day it is on what the fuck ever planet I'm on

#i am terrified of macauly culkin tbh

#some1 call da hottie police

#*toot toot too-* *stops* fuck. *toot too toot*

#i bet you looked down here to see if there was a little extra joke in the tags

#no not that low-- THAT'S NAUGHTY

#ok but if Xena's not in it it's not true

#if you ignore my flaming vomit body

#can i liver here?

#I mean who the hell knew bananas were flammable they never mention that

#these things are too glamorous to stick in my glorious orifices.

#one day the aliens will come and use our love of hollywood pets against us

#ain't nobody fuckin' with my click click cl...why won't this fucking remote work?

#abandoned you sayyyy….

#Thomas the NSFW Engine

#thigs gap

#are you out of YOUR MIND

#then again it doesn't really matter because the sun will explode and everything

#dogs getting hired is why I can't get a job. Thanks Obama

#I could make a list of people who need to stop. This list would span the Atlantic.

#partner in crime or partner in.. *whispers*....sexual activity

#Did you know that wolves also enjoy Mimosas like people?

#nope useless let's eat them

#no wanking till winter

#everybody is so utterly fucking dead jim

#this isn’t helping my fucking raging FIERY EXPLODING DESIRE TO SHHHHHHHHHHHHH  #SHAG HIM

#the other day i found a relative in a jar in the roof and THAT’S NOT SOMETHING ANYONE SHOULD HAVE TO STUMBLE ACROSS.

#quite a goddamn pickle if you ask me

#*crawls under a rotten log in the middle of the woods to die*

#but beastiality?!?!?

#my vibrator just electrocuted me.

#is this a joke I'm going to punch you in the lips with my mouth

#this is a vagina you can't fool me

#why can dogs even snore what is the point

#If the FBI sees this I’M KIDDING jfc

#I think it would be amazing to be killed by Christopher Lee.

#my first blowjob i was really scared so my boyfriend let me put nutella on his penis and all was well 

#australia is an animal joke factory

#just click your heels three times and then eat that mothafucka

#Pooh u ok?

#feelings disgust me

#ACTUALLY I WOULD TOTALLY DOWNLOAD A BUTT

#everyone is gay on tumblr

#you know what appeals to me sexually? cake.

#i also took the 'are you a potato?' test and the result was inconclusive.

#abraham lincoln could tell you that story and you would make him apologise for lying to you.

#I NEED MY HEART TO LIVE

#not even that time when i picked up that hitchhiker who turned out to be dead

#It's like Being John Malkovich only SEXY

#this isn't a metaphor for sexuality it's a tag about how i'm really bad at baseball.

#look don't come to me for spiritual advice i think the impending zombie uprising will sort everything out

#this scared the lousy shit out of me

#like when your house gets too dirty so you burn it down

#tagsofthewhathaveyou #sorry if this is hella long #technically it’s under a read more #but idk if mobile kept it that way

[bluesmemethings]

From The Outside starters pt 1

BREAK  MY  HEART

❝  I will not forget all the wonderful things you’ve done.  ❞

❝  I have no regrets.  ❞

❝  it’s like a test, it’s like a game, to see how much I can take.  ❞

❝  light me up and let me burn.  ❞

❝  tell me you’ve never loved me.  ❞

❝  tell me that it wasn’t real.  ❞

❝  tell me it was just a lie.  ❞

❝  I wanna feel the pain, I wanna see the light.  ❞

❝  break my heart.  ❞

❝  cut me deep enough so that the scar will stay.  ❞

❝  it’s like a drug, I can’t say no.  ❞

❝  this can only end one way.  ❞

BRAND  NEW  MOVES

❝  I’m the lock and you’re the key.  ❞

❝  you can have me anyway you like.  ❞

❝  treat me wrongly babe, it feels so right.  ❞

❝  don’t it feel like it’s been forever ?  ❞

❝  since the last time we danced I learned some brand new moves.  ❞

❝  since the last time we kissed I learned a thing or two.  ❞

GUYS  MY  AGE

❝  haven’t seen my ex since we broke up.  ❞

❝  you hold me like a woman.  ❞

❝  guys my age don’t know how to treat me.  ❞

❝  guys my age don’t know how to touch me.  ❞

❝  guys my age don’t know how to keep me.  ❞

❝  he’s the reason that I know what I’m looking for.  ❞

❝  I’m never going back.  ❞

❝  guys my age don’t know how to treat me, don’t know how to please me, don’t know how to read me.  ❞

❝  guys my age don’t know how to tease me, don’t know how to leave me, don’t know how to need me.  ❞

HOODIE

❝  you’d probably think I was psychotic if you knew what I’ve still got in my closet.  ❞

❝  sad, but true.  ❞

❝  it’s something I’ll never get over.  ❞

❝  it makes me feel a little bit closer to you.  ❞

❝  I can’t keep your love.  ❞

❝  I can’t keep your kiss.  ❞

❝  I gave you everything and all I got was this.  ❞

❝  I’m still rockin’ your hoodie and chewing on the strings.  ❞

❝  it makes me think about you so I wear it when I sleep.  ❞

❝  I’m still rockin’ your hoodie, even though it hurts.  ❞

❝  the smell of your cologne is still on it.  ❞

❝  if you want it back, I’m here waiting.  ❞

❝  come and take it back.  ❞

MY  CONSEQUENCE

❝  we don’t need anyone.  ❞

❝  come with me, don’t kill the vibe.  ❞

❝  hold me down if I get too wild.  ❞

❝  you and I can disappear, we can run away from here.  ❞

❝  it’s too late, no one can save us now.  ❞

❝  when you spill your guts, they don’t go back in.  ❞

❝  if I say too much, it’s my consequence.  ❞

❝  if I bleed too much, it’s my consequence.  ❞

❝  the world is ours --- at least, it is tonight.  ❞

O.D.D.

❝  I was raised by a mom who told me I should never listen to another voice but my own.  ❞

❝  some days I wake up, I just wanna hide under the covers.  ❞

❝  no matter what I do I’ll never be like all the others.  ❞

❝  I’m a little O.D.D., most people really don’t get me.  ❞

❝  I see the way they look at me.  ❞

❝  I can hear it when they talk that trash.  ❞

❝  my sister, bless her heart, she’s the only one that had my back when everyone else did not.  ❞

❝  looking back, it’s crazy, I almost turned into the person people told me I should be.  ❞

❝  any minutes she’s gonna crack.  ❞

❝  fuck bitches, get money, blow cash.  ❞

#ask meme #inbox meme #ask prompt #lyric prompt #lyric meme

[stevenuniversallyreviews]

Episode 56: Love Letters

“Three’s a crowd.”

So, it turns out time passes in Beach City! Its residents aren’t in a Springfield Limbo where seasons change but ages stay the same, and this opens a whole new realm of possibilities to expand the ongoing narrative of Steven growing up by having him actually grow up. We really shouldn’t take this for granted, considering how easy it is for a cartoon to freeze characters (especially child characters) in time, and honestly my biggest initial takeaway from Love Letters is that it’s the first episode that deals with how the passage of time by itself, rather than a series of events like Steven’s adventures, affects the show and its characters. This is a show where Steven, Lars, and Sadie disappeared for a week and nobody seemed to notice, so yeah, it matters.

The reason time alone is a factor is because we focus on the all-but-forgotten Jamie the Mailman. After a cameo in Mirror Gem/Ocean Gem, Jamie disappears without a trace for thirty episodes. This isn’t remarkable for a side character, especially one whose only other appearance is the first scene of the third episode. Jamie may be sweet and funny in Cheeseburger Backpack, but on a show full of sweet and funny characters he was easily lost in the background.

Well, it turns out his absence for the latter half of Season 1 has an in-universe explanation, one that allows the show to hang a quick lampshade on the common trope of vanishing characters while reintroducing him to those of us that forgot he existed: Jamie was literally gone, looking for his big break in the bright lights and busy streets of the Sunflower State, the big KS itself, home of Dorothy Gale and the Rockin’ Chalkin’ Jayhawks, that’s right, Kansas.

I’m really glad he’s back! Jamie is similar to Ronaldo in his role as a background character and occasional lead whose cluelessness is played for laughs and occasional drama. Both are passionate about self-expression (Jamie through acting, Ronaldo through blogging and the occasional documentary) and show some skill at it, but think themselves masters. However, where Ronaldo fluctuates between funny and grating at the drop of a fedora, Jamie is a consistent force for entertainment; he never reaches the comedic highs of Ronaldo’s A-game, but we never suffer any lows.

The secret, I think, is that Jamie’s core kindness evokes empathy instead of annoyance when he goes off the rails. His silliness doesn’t hurt anyone, and in an episode where he could’ve turned bitter and nasty over romantic rejection, he handles it surprisingly well considering his maturity level in other regards. This reaction may be a thematic necessity to teach Steven and Connie and the audience a generic “honesty is good” lesson, but it sets the tone for Jamie’s fascinating ability to be self-important without being a jerk.

Jamie’s overacting always benefits from Eugene Cordero’s veteran comedy chops, but is amped up even further by Lamar Abrams and Hellen Jo’s delightful brand of hypersilliness (see: Steven and Garnet’s workout in Future Vision, Amethyst’s burial service in Watermelon Steven, all of Rising Tides, Crashing Skies). Jamie’s love letter is zany enough, but actually seeing him write it does wonders to enhance what could have been a simple letter-reading sequence. Even if Jamie didn’t literally write the letter this way, it’s a nice peek into his ridiculous self-image, complete with anime twinkles.

Steven and Connie are classic theatrical meddlers in a classic farce, where love letters gone awry and easily avoidable misunderstandings create melodramatic tension. It’s a nifty twist that they aren’t playing matchmakers despite their resemblance to middlemen like Don Pedro or Dolly Levi, but just want to spare Jamie’s feelings. And I love that Steven, a hero with a weakness for schmaltz, rejects the idea of Jamie and Garnet as a couple even before Garnet does, solidifying that neither the show nor our well-meaning but misguided kids are going in that direction.

(Love Letters also don’t drag out secret of who wrote “Garnet’s” response letter, which further subverts typical farce tropes but probably has more to do with the eleven minute runtime.)

As Jamie says, Steven and Connie are super cute. It’s nice to have them as supporting characters (albeit the characters with the most screen time); we get snippets of them just hanging out in most of their episodes, but this time it doesn’t contrast with more serious drama like Connie’s replacement by a doppelganger or the possible end of their friendship. This is the first full episode of the two kids just being kids since Winter Forecast (oh look, another Jo/Abrams episode), and it’s soon to be followed by Connie’s temporary indoctrination; heavy episodes like Full Disclosure and Sworn to the Sword may be great, but a respite is appreciated.

Fortunately, a calmer (if wackier) tone doesn’t mean Love Letters lacks good character moments. Connie gets a quiet display of her growing emotional intelligence in the back-to-back scenes of Jamie’s admission of multiple rejections and the rewrite of Garnet’s letter. In the first scene, after hearing all about Jamie’s emotionally vulnerable state, she sees no issue with handing him another rejection and has to be stopped by Steven; whether or not ripping off the bandage is the right course of action, Connie’s reaction shows a distinct lack of tact. But in the second scene, she’s the head writer of the revamped letter (using the power of torrid soap opera know-how); even if she and Steven are way off-track in terms of how romance works here, she understands the problem and wants to help.

Little slip-ups and corrections like these do a great job of showing how far Connie has come from Bubble Buddies without losing the realistic awkwardness that makes her so endearing. Her disadvantage to Steven on the emotional intelligence front also continues to even out their relationship, as she schools him in book smarts throughout the series and will soon become a far more capable tactical fighter to his natural talent, a la Katara and Aang. Just because Steven isn’t an idiot and Connie isn’t emotionless doesn’t mean their differences have to go away, and Love Letters is a great example of her lower-key foil duty in action.

Garnet is mostly great as the oblivious, then apathetic subject of Jamie’s affection. Her sexualized emergence from the sea is played for laughs thanks to over-the-top visual effects and Estelle’s exaggerated sultriness. Visually, while her introduction may evoke classic Birth of Venus imagery, the more amusing sight gag can be found in the, erm, interesting positioning of Jamie’s mailsack malebag mailbag as he’s filled with sudden lust:

But back to Garnet. Her instant and insistent dismissal of Jamie may be cold, but it’s fair and faithful to her character: Garnet is locked down on the relationship front, and we’ve seen how little she cares about the feelings of human strangers from her interactions with Kofi (and her general demeanor). She benefits from having little to do with Steven and Connie’s scheming, which makes her another victim of poor communication who gets fed up with what she perceives to be a pushy admirer instead of doubling down on her bluntness to a point that might make her seem mean; it also reinforces how important is to take the feelings of both people involved in a crush into account.

Even so, my biggest/only issue with Love Letters is her final conversation with Jamie, where she dismisses his infatuation as a performance. I guess I get that she’s trying to let him down easier than before and is putting things in a way he understands, but there’s a much better way to differentiate between love and a crush than essentially saying his crush is delusional. As someone who’s had crushes and has been in love, sure, the latter is strong enough to make the former look tame in retrospect. But that doesn’t make infatuation an act, and for a show that’s all about feelings, Steven Universe could do way better at explaining Garnet’s point of view without being condescending about someone’s emotions (especially the emotions of a young audience).

That said, Jamie’s response is somewhat true: local theater, at least, is really solid advice.

Future Vision!

Beyond local theater being in the future, Love Letters gets a nice resolution in Jamie insisting that he’s moved on in I Am My Mom. And then we get to see that, uh, nope, he’s still holding the torch as of Reunited.

Our introduction to Barb is a long time coming, and the fact that she knows Greg telegraphs their low-key and largely off-screen friendship.

If every pork chop were perfect, we wouldn’t have inconsistencies…

Despite Garnet proclaiming that love at first sight doesn’t exist, The Answer more or less shows Ruby and Sapphire’s relationship to be just that. Maybe they spent more time on the surface getting to know each other than it seems, but as per its fairy tale nature, love springs up pretty much immediately. (And it’s great! But maybe don’t have that person be against the notion of instant love.)

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

I enjoy the goofiness here and the dedication to a farcical format for a theatrical character, and as I said, the acknowledgment that time is an actual factor for this show earns some points. But beyond not sticking the landing, and it’s honestly just a little too broad to be a favorite.

Top Fifteen

Steven and the Stevens

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

The Return

Jailbreak

Rose’s Scabbard

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Winter Forecast

On the Run

Warp Tour

Maximum Capacity

The Test

Ocean Gem

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Future Vision

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

No Thanks!

     4. Horror Club      3. Fusion Cuisine      2. House Guest      1. Island Adventure

#love letters #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

[mhdiaries]

Journal of Jackson Jekyll

Yes, I do mind if you read my journal.

On September 9...

So it turns out I’m a monster. Well part-time monster actually, which leaves me pretty much full-time confused. It’s not like I didn’t know that mom and dad were both monsters. The first time I saw mom’s Hyde side come out was when I was 5 and we were visiting my dad’s side of the family. Some of the little neighborhood monsters decided that they were going to play “kick the can” only they were going to use me as the can. Every time I tried to run home they blocked my way and pushed me down. I started crying and then they really started making fun of me. Then all of a sudden I heard this roar and there was my mom. Even though it didn’t look like her I knew it was and honestly all I could think was, “Why mother, what big muscles you have.” Needless to say I never had any problem with the local monsters again. Dad’s a fire elemental of course and I grew up playing with Heath so I was never afraid of monsters. I just didn’t think any monster heritage had passed on to me. When I asked mom and dad if they knew me and Holt were the same person they said, “Of course we knew you and Holt were the same person - we’re your parents; now finish your breakfast or you’ll be late for school.” Well thanks for clearing that up for me mom and dad. Cause you know it’s not like having that little bit of information would have been helpful at all. Good thing I’m past those awkward teenage years where news like this could really have a negative impact on my psyche. (Ooh - sarcasm. I like it) HH

On September 12...

I had to go to the mad scientist, I mean mad pediatrician, today. Mom says that until I’m an adult I need to continue seeing him because he has the most experience dealing with growing monsters. I feel fine but mom and dad are worried because what triggers my transformation to Holt has changed. It used to happen when the sun went down but now it seems to be loud music, I think. The waiting room was almost empty except for a mother werewolf and two young cubs. While mom filled out paperwork I sat down and tried to find something to read that wasn’t chewed, gooed or covered in monster germs. Then I heard one of the werewolf cubs say, “Mommy! Is that a normie?” “Yes honey, don’t stare.” “Is he going to eat us?” I could tell that she was embarrassed so I said, “No way - I’m totally allergic to werewolf it makes me sneeze - ACHOO!” The cubs eyes got really wide and then she started laughing, “Aw that’s not true.” Then she held up her foot and said, “I can tie my shoe!” I said, “That’s amazing, can you show me how?” The werewolf mom relaxed too and it turns out she’s related to Clawd’s family. Pretty soon a lab assistant appeared, “Jackson Jekyll?” She led us back to a room and said, “The doctor will be with you shortly.” Then, “The wait.” Which means sitting on the crinkly paper covered exam table forever and wondering what would happen if I started playing with the instruments in the exam room and the doctor walked in. Anyway just about the time I woke up enough boredom and courage to start picking up some of the cooler looking instruments laying on the counter I hear the mad pediatrician pulling my chart and the door opens. He’s wearing a lab coat with purple vampire ducks and his stethoscope cover is a fuzzy yellow dragonhead. I’m sure it calms the younger monsters but it scares the normie out of me that the volatile nature of my elemental side + my hyde heritage + being a teenager = constant change. He said that the trigger would probably change again before I reach adulthood. Then he gave me a lollypop, scheduled me for another test and said he wanted to see me again in three months. Now I’m worried about what the trigger is going to change to next. What if it’s showers? Would it be worth giving them up for the rest of high school just so I can have my own life? (Not unless you want your new nickname to be “Stinky”) HH 

On September 21... 

It seems like I spent the first part of my life wishing I was a monster and now that I am maybe now I wish I wasn’t. (Well you’re stuck with it now.) HH When I was spending all that time trying to get Draculaura to bit me so I could become a vampire I never really thought about anything except wanting to fit in with all the other monsters. Now the part of me that fits in doesn’t even get to enjoy it.(Whine much?) HH It’s like the worst of both worlds and now I don’t fit in anywhere at all. We’re all supposed to meet with Mr. D’eath, the school guidance counselor, this week. Wonder if I’ll need to make two appointments (Lame - I already know what I’m going to be... FAMOUS!) HH

On September 23...

So I had my appointment with Mr. D’eath today it started out  about as terrible as I thought it was going to be. Turns out he’d never counseled a “normie” and it seemed like he didn’t know exactly what to say. In fact, he mostly just spent a lot of time squeezing one of those stress balls made to look like a cartoon character with eyes that bugged out when you squeezed it. It was pretty distracting especially when I realized it was a cartoon “normie”. The squeezing wasn’t nearly as distracting as his “throat clearing” which kind of sounded like a hand full of marbles being run through a garbage disposal. I kept trying to figure out how he made that noise because he doesn’t really even have a throat since as far as I can tell he’s pure skeleton. He must have flipped through my permanent record ten times before he finally said: So you see Hackson... I mean Jackson, the career opportunities for normies in the monster world are somewhat er... um... (sound of marbles being run through the disposal again) limited. There’s monster hunter, monster hunter’s assistant, mad scientist, ooh hunchback! You don’t happen to have a hump do you? No? Bad luck there then. Ah hah! How about Monster/Normie Relations Expert? (Figured it’d be something where the wardrobe is even less cool than what you wear now) HH Well that was something I certainly knew a little something about. I had an old coach in the normie world that used to always say, “Play to your strengths Jackson, play to your strengths.” So Mr. D’eath loaded me down with college brochures and rushed me out of his office. I think both of us were glad it was over. 

On October 8...

Finally took that test my mad pediatrician set up for me. It turned out to be a test to determine the type and volume of music that brings out Holt. So I sat in a soundproof booth wearing headphones while a technician played music at different volumes and with different time signatures. I made it through waltzes, marches, polka and chamber music but I don’t remember what he played next. (That’s when he started playing the good stuff.) HH Anyway the results of the test isolated the trigger; music with a 4/4 time signature played in excess of 90 decibels. You know what’s good about this? Me neither.

On November 2...

It seems now that every monster knows Holt and me are the “same” person/monster I don’t get hassled as much for being a “normie”. Not that it makes any difference to Manny Taur since he pretty much wants to bully down on any creature who’s smaller than he is. When he first started picking on me I stood up to him cause once a bully knows he can push you around he’ll never stop, but Deuce finally took me aside and said, “Listen bro - you’ve won a lot of respect standing up to Manny and don’t take this the wrong way but...” Apparently Manny was waiting for the right time to mash me like a slow matador. I kept waiting for it to happen but it never did. In fact it seemed like Manny was purposely avoiding me for some reason. It was almost like some monster had said something to him. (Yeah - wonder who that could have been?) HH

On November 15... 

Headless Headmistress Bloodgood asked for “volunteers” to help with the middle school carnival fundraiser so Deuce and I volunteered for set up and take down duty. It was cool and we didn’t have to dress up like clowns or sit in the dunk tank. We set up tents, carried boxes then hung out and waited for everything to be over. We checked out some of the other booths too cause we had plenty of time to kill. Venus and Draculaura were doing face painting; Rochelle was teaching monsters how to build sand castles, some of which would have looked pretty good if they hadn’t been built next to Rochelle’s sand cathedra with working bell tower and miniature gargoyles. The best though was the stunt Robecca performed. She flew over the carnival a couple of times to get every monster’s attention then flew straight up until it sounded like her rocket boots stalled and she came streaking back toward the ground like a falling star. A huge gasp went up from the crowd as it looked like she was going to crash then she fired her rockets back up and totally buzzed the crowd less than 20 feet off the ground! It was so awesome I actually gave Holt a chance to see her second performance. (Thanks dude - it was totally rockin’ and I would have been bummed if I didn’t get to see it) HH When the carnival was over we helped take everything down and all the volunteers went to hang out at the Coffin Bean. It was dark by then and I would have missed out on that part of the fun if things were the same as they used to be. Still hoping I won’t have to give up showers someday though. (That makes both of us “Stinky”) HH

#monster high #monster high diary #monster high journal #jackson jekyll #text post #wave 4

[intergalactic-strut]

Don Airey Comprehensive Discography (WIP)

An attempt. Ongoing. (cit. I note that the discography on his site is not up to date and appears to derive from discogs.com) I will organise it differently and have separate posts for live appearances, and for a chronology. This tracks appearances ‘on record’ (performances in some capacity, not including arrangements/conducting - I will put the footage portions into a separate post once I get the information more organised) This excludes compilations/singles(which overlap with albums) I KNOW I missed stuff/Some dates could be a bit wonky. Hence WIP. Live only stints (i.e. ELO...) are not included.

1974

Cozy Powell’s Hammer - NaNaNa                                        “Lost Reel Masters” recording sessions

1976 Colosseum II – Strange New Flesh Babe Ruth – Kid’s Stuff

1977

Colosseum II – Electric Savage Colosseum II – War Dance

1978

Andrew Lloyd Webber – Variations (With Colosseum II) Gary Moore – Back On The Streets Black Sabbath – Never Say Die! Strife (UK band) – Back To Thunder Jim Rafferty - Don’t Talk Back

1979

Bernie Marsden ‎– And About Time Too Cozy Powell – Over The Top Rainbow – Down To Earth

*Thin Lizzy(Gorham, Lynott, Moore, Powell, Airey) - Old Grey Whistle Test appearance. Recorded Sarah with Lizzy with string synths - Huey Lewis’ harmonica version was used on the album.

1980

Blizzard of Ozz – Blizzard Of Ozz The Michael Schenker Group – The Michael Schenker Group

1981

Cozy Powell – Tilt Rainbow – Difficult To Cure Rainbow – Jealous Lover ‎ (EP) Bogdan - Who Do You Think You Are (Single)

1982

Gary Moore - Corridors of Power

John Mizarolli – Message From The 5th Stone

1983

Gary Moore - Dirty Fingers Ozzy Osbourne – Bark At The Moon Gary Moore – Rockin’ Every Night – Live In Japan Chris Thompson – Out of the night The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra & Friends – Arrested (The Music Of The Police) Gary Moore – Live At The Marquee ‎(Recorded 1980)  Cozy Powell - Octopuss

1984

Plum And Youth –   Got You Babe Ozzy Osbourne - Bark at the Moon (VHS)

1985

Phenomena – Phenomena Gary Moore – Run For Cover Alaska – The Pack Rainbow – Finyl Vinyl

1986

Sinner - Comin' Out Fighting Zeno - Zeno

1987

Divlje Jagode – Wild Strawberries Glasgow – Zero Four One Whitesnake – Whitesnake Helix  – Wild In The Streets Fastway - Bad Bad Girls

1988

Gary Moore – After The War *Jethro Tull – 1987-88 on tour, appears on the 20 Years of Jethro Tull compilation Eddie Kidd - Lover for Life

Don Airey – K2 (Tales Of Triumph & Tragedy)

1989

Fastway - On Target Mona Liza Overdrive – Vive La Ka Bum Whitesnake – Slip Of The Tongue Crossbones – Crossbones

1990

Gary Moore – Still Got The Blues Tigertailz – Bezerk Perfect Crime - Blond On Blonde Gary Moore & Midnight Blues Band – An Evening Of The Blues ‎(VHS)                                                             Live At Montreux (1990)

Forcefield IV – Let The Wild Run Free Jagged Edge - You Don’t Love Me Bruce Dickinson - Tattoo’d Millionaire Judas Priest - Painkiller (on A Touch of Evil, but allegedly, other tracks exist)

1991

Various – All Stars (N.W.O.B.H.M.)

1992

Eddie Hardin – Wind In The Willows Brian May – Back To The Light UFO - High Stakes & Dangerous Men Cozy Powell – The Drums Are Back… Forcefield – Instrumentals Anthem - Domestic Booty Kaizoku - Kaizoku Bernie Marsden - The Friday Rock Show Sessions

1993

Katrina And The Waves – Edge Of The Land English Steel - Start ‘Em Young

1994

True Brits – She Won’t Rock True Brits – Vol. II – She’s In Danger True Brits – Vol. II – One Good Reason Leo Lyon’s Kick - Tough Trip Through Paradise Graham Bonnet - Here Comes The Night

1995

Paul Di’Anno Dennis Stratton - The Original Iron Men Katrina And The Waves - Turn Around

1996

Various - Twang! A Tribute to Hank Marvin & the Shadows Aciarium - The Heavy Metal Super Stars 

1997

Katrina And The Waves – Walk On Water *With whom Don won Eurovision ‘97, conducting, arranging, and playing on                   Love Shines A Light

Glenn Tipton – Baptizm Of Fire Quatermass II – Long Road

1998

The Snakes/Bernie Marsden & Micky Moody  Live In Europe The Snakes – Once Bitten… ‎ Martin Darvill and Friends - The Greatest Show on Earth Colin Blunstone - The Light Inside Olaf Lenk - Sunset Cruise

1999

Dario Mollo / Tony Martin – The Cage Millennium - Millenium

2000

Millenium – Hourglass Ten – Babylon Snakebites - A Tribute to Whitesnake Micky Moody - I Eat Them For Breakfast Olaf Lenk’s F.O.O.D - Fun Stuff

2001

Empire - Hypnotica The Company of Snakes – Here They Go Again Silver  – Silver ‎ Glitter - On Mario Fasciano - E-Thnic

2002

Empire – Trading Souls Tribute to Boston - Tribute to Boston The Company of Snakes - Burst the Bubble Metalium -- Hero Nation - Chapter 3

2003

Deep Purple – Bananas Uli Jon Roth – Metamorphosis of Vivaldi’s Four Seasons Bernie Marsden – Big Boy Blue Silver - Intruder

2004

Living Loud – Living Loud Living Loud - Debut Live Concert 2004 Iommi With Glenn Hughes – The 1996 Dep Sessions (aka “Eighth Star”) Silver - Addiction Animals and Friends - Instinct

2005

Deep Purple – Rapture Of The Deep Anthem - No Smoke Without Fire Kimberley Rew - Essex Hideaway

2006

Gary Moore – Old New Ballads Blues Ian Gillan – Gillan’s Inn Tipton, Entwhistle, and Powell - Edge of the World Gwyn Ashton - Prohibition Glenn Tipton – Give Blood And Paint It Black Strawbs – A Taste Of Strawbs ‎(*Also toured with the Strawbs in 1993)

2007

Jorn  – The Gathering Deep Purple – Live At Montreux 2006:They All Came Down To Montreux Jorn – Unlocking The Past Mario Fasciano - Porta San Gennaro Napoli

2008

Don Airey - A Light In The Sky

MSG / Schenker-Barden – In The Midst Of Beauty ‎ Mick Moody & Friends - Live and Rocking! Judas Priest - Nostradamus Deep Purple – Around The World Live ‎ (DVD)

2009

Ozzy Osbourne – 1982 Speak Of The Devil Straight Up Taz Taylor Band – Straight Up Carl Sentance - Mind Doctor Various – Top Musicians Play Whitesnake

2010

Gary John Barden – Rock ‘N Roll My Soul

2011

Don Airey - All Out

Deep Purple (With Orchestra) – Live At Montreux 2011 Roger Glover And The Guilty Party – If Life Was Easy Saxon – Call To Arms Begger’s Bride - On a Trip to L.A. Michael Schenker - Temple of Rock Wishbone Ash - Elegant Stealth Persian Risk - Once A King Various - Help! For Japan

2013

Deep Purple – Now What?! ‎

Schubert -  In Rock Wolfpakk - Cry Wolf Forever Deep - Forever Deep

2014

Don Airey - Keyed Up

Hollywood Monsters - Big Trouble  Deep Purple - Live in Verona (DVD) Bernie Marsden - Shine Celebrating Jon Lord: The Rock Legend Persian Risk - Who Am I AraPacis - A Disturbing Awakening

2015

Rainbow - 1979 Long Island Rainbow - 1979 Denver Deep Purple - From the Setting Sun....(In Wacken) Deep Purple - To the Rising Sun... (In Tokyo)

2016

Rainbow - Live At the Monsters of Rock (Donington 1980)

2017

Deep Purple - Infinite Don Airey - Coming Home

2018

Don Airey - One of A Kind (May 25)

Michael Schenker Fest - Resurrection (March 2nd)

#don airey #info!post #text!post #discography

[cabinboy100]

BABY DRIVER: Take a Ride w/Edgar Wright's Rockin' Wheelman

Thanks to the Brattle Theatre and the Independent Film Festival of Boston, I got to watch BABY DRIVER at an advance screening last week!

It is a gorgeous musical roller coaster ride of a film. Writer and director Edgar Wright supercharges another beloved cinematic icon-slash-genre—the Wheelman or Driver—with his remarkable style, vision, wit, and rhythm. While not *a* musical, per se, BABY DRIVER is very musical, delivering snappy dialogue, sharp looks, slick moves, death-defying driving, and brutal gunplay, all choreographed to a soundtrack beautifully interwoven with the film…

There's not a lot more to say, really, beyond additional superlatives upon superlatives, and I don't want to go into scenes or characters too deeply and give up any of the fun. I think I'll just let one of the trailers do the talking…

Bottom line—GO SEE THIS MOVIE! And see it IN THE THEATER!

[rant] And for Space Pope's sake, do NOT take your phone out for any reason while the movie is running. You just paid $10 to $20 for this amazing experience! We live in an age of wonder that allows you to ignore a movie for free at home. Save the spacebooking, twitting, and txting for later. Or if you're gonna do that, or even look at a message on your annoyingly-bright-in-a-darkened-theater phone, get out of your seat, walk to an exit, behind a barrier, or *maybe* the back wall, out of anyone's view, and then have a look, respond if you must, and get back to the show. If you're waiting on your wife to finish delivering, or the funeral parlor's supposed to call about Pop's arrangements, or you're expecting a call from the doctor with those test results—WTF are you doing at the movies? If your phone lights up and you can see it, believe me, everyone next to and behind you can see it. Keep it in your pocket. If you see someone next to or near you futzing w/a screen, do everyone a favor, be your own (and my) hero, and ask them to put it away or take it outside. [/rant]

Beware, beyond this point, I'm gonna start lobbing spoilers into my rambling. So, exit pursued by a bear now if you haven't seen BABY DRIVER already!

CRITS (oh-so-minor, probably more like backhanded compliments).

I don't feel the heart in this that I do in the Cornetto films. Those films—SHAUN OF THE DEAD, HOT FUZZ, THE WORLD'S END—had relationships at their centers. But I have to say that my not feeling that with BABY DRIVER is very fair and true to the driver genre. You don't get the warm fuzzies thinking about BULLITT, THE BLUES BROTHERS, or THE FRENCH CONNECTION, right? Well, okay, maybe THE BLUES BROTHERS. =)

The characters tend to be flat and archetypal, taking a back seat *sorry-not-sorry* to the action and style. Wright does get me rooting for some of the baddies along the way, because of their professionalism, circumstance, charisma, and, well, moral relativism. And while they may be flat, they own their two dimensions and are memorable, essential, love- and hate-able in their own ways.

Of course, we know who we're rooting for—our Baby on board.

Maybe this isn't fair to BABY DRIVER, but I'd *just* seen Walter Hill's THE DRIVER, right before it, and was so frickin' impressed with its style and tension and story-slash-chase-telling cinematography. I found myself wanting more from the final car-v-car showdown in BABY. I feel like both Wright's BABY DRIVER and Refn's DRIVE put their tightest and tautest chase set piece at the start of their films. They are a-ma-zing intros to each film experience, but greedy me, I want even higher peaks in the middle and the end.

Oh, don't get me wrong—there ARE more peaks, gorgeously choreographed, executed, shot, and edited peaks, throughout. It's been a week now and I still feel my thoughts are vibrating from the experience.

I'm gonna see it again, so maybe I'll revisit this notion of the "starting with dessert" problem, if that's what it is. Maybe it was having THE DRIVER on my palate affecting my perspective…

LOVES.

I love the reason that Baby is always listening to his music. I don't know which movie or story first used music as a way to time and count off the steps to a heist—at the moment I can only think of HUDSON HAWK =) —but I was almost surprised that that seemed to be what was happening with Baby's character in the film's opening chase scene (w/Buddy, Darling, and Griff). It almost seemed too, well, easy…y'know, for Edgar Wright. But it *is* Edgar Wright, so we know he's gonna do something brilliant with it.

Yeah, I know. Sometimes I wish I could watch a movie with my 9-yo brain, and not think so much.

Then we see Baby on his apparently regular walk to Octane coffee, and in a beautiful "Harlem Shuffle" music video starring Baby against the graffiti of Atlanta streets, we learn that music permeates every moment of Baby's life. Man, when Debora walks by outside the shop in front of the rainbow heart—so simply perfect. =)

And I'm pretty sure that when he retraces his steps, "Shake Shake" has been added to a column or wall that had "Right" on the way in.

Later we learn that there's more method to Baby's madness for music. Doc explains that he suffers from tinnitus, and music helps keep the ringing in his ears at bay. Later still, we learn that he has a habit of recording much of what he hears, using the audio as samples in musical creations of his own. I really wish we'd been able to see him create some more of those, and/or hear more from his extensive library.

WRIGHTS.

Some little bits of fun that I feel are somehow Wright-ian, whether intended by the director or not. =)

J.D., of Bats's crew, is given a simple assignment—pick up three HALLOWEEN Michael Myers masks for use in the robbery. What does he show up with? Three Mike Myers (as Austin Powers) Halloween masks. When questioned about his cluelessness, one of the gang tries to clarify—The Bad Guy from HALLOWEEN, the movie! To which he replies—Oh! You mean Jason! And hey—What's Buddy's real name? Jason! As in Jason from FRIDAY THE 13th? As in the guy who keeps getting killed by never dies?

(This exchange inspired me to goof a BABY DRIVER: Halloween the 13th meta-mashup poster = )

And what's Baby's real name? M I L E S of course!

Hrm…Good thing Wright didn't make this movie on the continent somewhere or in Canada or his name would've been Kilometers! *groan*

Bananas! Doc reveals that's the phone call confirmation code word he receives from his contacts after a successful interaction. Darling reacts to the playing of one of Baby's tapes—"Is he slow?"—with B-A-N-A-N-A-S. When the Butcher's Atlanta PD colleagues show up for revenge on Doc, they give him the code word—"Bananas!"—along with some hot lead.

The invisible camera returns! In WORLD'S END, Wright shoots a scene between Simon Pegg and Rosamund Pike in the restroom of a pub with the camera pointed squarely at the mirror on the wall. Sure, it could be digital magic, but I can't help but wonder if Wright has pulled off some practical magic. Just the right lighting combined with a glass plate at the correct complementary angle or something? Well, whatever he did then, he does again in…I want to say at least two shots—maybe three, with reflections in a car exterior?—in BABY DRIVER. My lame brain is now only recalling one, tho, in a pan across the washing machines of a laundromat, a sweet bit of Courtship, American Style.

Yeah, probably some "simple" digital trickery…But maybe only for the last 10% that some Houdini-like stage magic couldn't quite cover? I want to know but don't want to. =)

And speaking of courtship—I kind of adore how Baby sharing his earbuds with Debora physically connects them while they're moving around the laundromat and talking. It turns their conversation into a sweet dance number. A bit of Wright magic.

Becky & Ella? In the elevator down to P1, P2, and P3 after the first job, Buddy promises to take Darling to Bacchanalia, for the best wining and dining around, or something to that effect. When Debora presses Baby for an idea on where they'll go out, he tells her what sounds like "Becky and Ella" for the best wining and dining around. NB: Found out Bacchanalia *is* an actual ATL restaurant, but I don't believe we ever see its name or signage on screen.

I WONDER…

About the "Spirit of 85" or whatever it was called. Doc mentions it to help establish Baby's cred. Apparently Baby tied the Atlanta PD in knots on what sounded like a crazy prolonged chase involving a cloverleaf interchange of highways. I think the word "spaghetti" was used? No doubt native Atlantans will appreciate the description of the feat. Baby's Kessel Run? =)

Oh, man! Who is responsible for Baby's wardrobe? For half if not most of the film, he is strategically yet uncannily decked out in duds that scream "Han Solo" to me. I'm talking A NEW HOPE—black vest over white shirt with dark pants.

(Baby’s taste in clothes—as well as his backstory and talents—inspired this BABY DRIVER: Nerf Herder mashup… =)

After the film, I was told that our Baby, Ansel Elgort, had been on the short list for the young Han Solo film. I honestly had no idea as I did and do my best to block that sort of "news" as much as possible when it comes to films I'm looking forward to.

Was this Wright, Elgort, or another member or members of the crew expressing their support for HANsel? I have no idea how the timelines of young Solo casting and BABY DRIVER shooting line up. But if the decision was made before shooting, maybe Ansel’s turn as Baby becomes a kind of what-could-have-been/what-you-missed strutting? =)

When I heard about the LEGO MOVIE directors being dismissed from the project, I thought that maybe they'd seen BABY DRIVER and realized that Edgar Wright had already made the movie—what's the point now? =)

And in the Hollywood minute before Ron Howard was announced, I wondered if maybe BABY DRIVER might possibly be the perfect proof of capabilities for Wright as the new director. Alas—*sigh*—not to be.

I wonder just what the heck happened with Disney/Marvel/ANT-MAN and Wright.

CINEMA SERENDIPITY…

I love it when my experience of films and shows connect in little unexpected ways…

Last week, I got to see Edgar Wright's amazing action jukebox, BABY DRIVER. The next night, I caught Kumail Nanjani and Emily Gordon's hilarious, heart-warming and -punching rom-coma-com, THE BIG SICK. And tonight, a week later, experienced Bong Joon Ho's OKJA on the big screen before it streams on Netflix.

Yeah, none of that connects on paper, but in my head it's a different story… =)

In THE BIG SICK, Kumail and Emily's non-dating dates reveal his obsession with cricket and appreciation of zombies, which of course would logically add up to a SHAUN OF THE DEAD poster on his bedroom wall. That's some solid math, and reminded me that I've followed some twitter exchanges between them about movies (about ROGUE ONE, Riz Ahmed, representation, and a buddy heist film).

The content of OKJA does not directly connect to anything Wrightian (as far as I could tell on a first viewing), but Bong Joon Ho's previous film, the must-see sci-fi fable SNOWPIERCER, features Jamie Bell as a character named Edgar, apparently named for Wright. That note, plus the fact that Edgar was best buddy of Chris Evans's Curtis, inspired a couple of mashup posters, one of them a meta-mashup starring SCOTT PILGRIM's Lucas Lee.

Yeah, like I said…it's all in my head.

Why do I have a feeling like this will be read back to me in court at a later date?

BABY DRIVER AT AN ADVANCE SCREENING…?

Oh—how did I get to see all these films in the theater? And before their wide release dates? The Brattle Theatre and the Independent Film Festival of Boston are my enablers-slash-suppliers. If you're Boston-local and love moviegoing, I *highly* recommend you check their schedules and membership privileges, join/donate/support either or both, and see some amazing movies!

Allright, enough a-ramblin'. If you made it this far, I'm sorry and thanks much. Now, get thee to the theater and BABY DRIVER up!

Keep on keepin’ on~

#BABY DRIVER #Edgar Wright #movie #ramble #review #THE BIG SICK #OKJA #Brattle Theatre #Independent Film Festival of Boston #Ansel Elgort #Han Solo #Mike Myers #Michael Myers #HALLOWEEN #FRIDAY THE 13TH #Edgar eggs #easter eggs

[successe-s]

who wants @successe-s tips on how to study like an absolute pro? i'm sure you do! as a high school senior, i'd like to say i've developed some pretty good study habits over the years; i hope these help you get through those rough patches and obtain the grades you deserve!

figure out what kind of learner you are

don’t write out copious amounts of notes if they don’t help! take a look at this infographic here to work out how you can make your studying suit your preferred learning style.

turn your phone off (or at least put it away)

phone's are our best friend, until they become our worst enemy... they are one of the biggest distractions so use an app like forest to obliterate any desire to chat to your friends before an important exam of test.

find a rockin’ study playlist

if you’re like me, you can’t have a good study sesh without some background noise. my favourite playlist at the moment is the spotify playlist ’study vibes’. find what works for you: whether that be classical music, chilled-out electronic etc.

have a clean, useful space

make sure you don’t have a desk with piles of dirty laundry, or rubbish lying around. everything on your desk should be there to help you get in the mood for studying: nice smelling candles, lamps, stationery, textbooks.

just get to it!

hugh laurie said ‘it’s a terrible thing, i think in life to wait until you’re ready… there is almost no such thing as ready. there is only now’

and it’s true! don’t wait around to get the grades you deserve. pick yourself up, do the work, and make yourself proud!!!

#school masterpost #study masterpost #masterpost #mine #look jinae #my masterpost #school #lawblr #studyblr #study inspiration #studyspo #study tips

[bkushnir]

Asteroid Desert Songs, mid 1990s at Milk in Tokyo.  I just heard that Muromatsu Takahiro, aka Magic Alex, the man on the mic pictured here, has passed this week and I wanted to recognize his greatness.  This was a band of rebels, pushing buttons, stretching what was considered the domain of a band to become a sect of knob twiddlers and artistic musical scientists, testing the boundaries of what could legitimately be called music.  And still, they rocked.  The cover of their first CD is below, on the MOOD label - “Pre Main E.P.”  

From the liner notes:  “Introducing - Asteroid Desert Songs - Three talented, mysterious young-adult men coming into prominence with their first great pre-main e.p.    To introduce them individually we have....

Koichi Matsunaga: His zodiac sign is Aquarius.  6 feet talls with dandy beard.  Brown eyes and haircolor’s gold. Writing all Lyrics on this record and singing on BASS part.  Convinces that a great new poetic talent has been discovered.

Takahiro Muramatsu: Virgo.  He is known as MAGIC ALEX.  The percussionist who contributes the high falsetto voice called “Rockin’ Robin style” which can be identified in so many of the arrangements.  Loving wife and C. Schulz’s famous comic strip “Peanuts.”

Koki Takai: Sagittarius. Considered to be one of the finest guitarists around, also fills in many of the vocal background parts.  He is youngest in the group and having a appeal of great importance to you.  “Hi girls I’m just single!!”   ... Uhh... he’s so fresh.”     MOODMAN <M.O.O.D.>

And here is what Magic Alex himself wrote as Liner Notes for this E.P., which I personally consider to be some of the best liner notes ever.  With these written words alone the reader gets a complete sense of the aesthetic of the artists, without listening to a single note of the music.  

“At that time, however other members might be, I was absorbed in miami bass and the likes of that.  My first 7″ single was released and I was on top of the world. And almost always my haircut was poor-looking.  Ahh! Folly Jet (as far as I remember, Koki had already taken this stage name) was earnestly saving money to get a Nagura, this supreme open-reel tape deck was his heart’s desire, to replace his Nakamichi’s Dragon, though the dream has yet to come true.  And Kochi, alias Oscillotron, was putting whimsical catchwords onto the charge of new age music section on the fifth floor of a big CD shop in Shibuya, and was pleased with himself.  And Akira made windbreakers with the logo of ADS ATHLETIC OF SOUND and we four would wear them when we hung out, stupidly you could say.  That’s the way we lived in 1995.  

“It was in the winter of 1994 when Asteroid Desert Songs began.  This single CD was released in the middle of 1996, so we made our debut after about one and a half year activity as a group.  I remember well that we visited the house of Moodman, who was the label runner of “Mood,” about discussing details for releasing our first CD.  We clubbed together and we bought a box of imported chocolates and a bottle of cheap wine for him.  I think I wore Kenzo’s suit, my favorite at that time.  Moodman didn’t come at the appointed time so we got anxious, while his wife treated us to cakes of Pertie, a patisserie at Paris.  It was as like yesterday that we chatted and selected the photograph for the sleeve of the CD together with the designer Ukawa.  

“As you can understand when you listen to the CD, re-released after an interval of ten years, we ADS played an enthusiastic kind of electro hip hop but to my regret in retrospect I can’t find any merit in that, i.e. that we did electro hip hop ten years ago.  Smart listeners would not even give a glance to such a thing then.  Even in 1995 and 1996, there were record shops which sold disks such as “Smurph Across the Surf” by Micronawts at a premium prices of 8,000 yen and I had the impression that several small independent labels including Clear in London tried to revive electros.  Some journals with sharp ears and who were novelty hunters even spoke of an “Electro Revival” and things like that.  But actually it has taken about ten years since then for electros to achieve its certain breakthrough (I think you can say that).  If anything appears ten years earlier than expected nobody notices nor cares.  Koki would often sigh and say, “Electro can’t make me a hero.”  Of course ADS had no reputation for being ahead of the times. 

“Toward the end of 1995, we played at a live-house in Shinjuku (we acted as a kind of opener for Cornelius, a very popular band at that time, and D.M.B.Q. also appeared on the stage that day) but got a very bad response even booing from the audience.   Boys in the seats near the stage deliberately skipped the needle on the turntable and threw cans of beer at us and we were finally pulled down from the stage by a guard.  Such being the case, as you fans of ADS who will listen to this CD can guess, ten years ago maybe we were wrong and the times were wrong, too.  

“The numbers of initial copies of this CD were only 300. Sometimes old acquaintances have asked us, “Do you still keep the master tape of that single?” as though they had just remembered it existed but generally it was a tacit understanding that it’s better to forget about it.  So I am really pleased that we are able to be re-release it.  Possibly, with this opportunity, this single CD (the glorious debut-disk of ADS) may be reevaluated and favorably accepted.  I’d like to sincerely say thank you to all of our dear friends who gave us so much help with this release.  

I hope this CD will become one of the most favorite disks in your CD library.”

Magic Alex note

R.I.P. Magic Alex

[cispicious]

JUNE 2, 2011

Hey there. I doubt (people will read this) that journals are supposed to be used for advertising, or propoganda about oneself. I'm guessing it's what normal journals are used for: to document the day to day trials of human life. Yea, but I'm not human. So I guess my definition of a journal shall be, "Trials of a Nephal" If you don't know what a Nephal is, ask God. Oh, and in case you're far too lazy - or just don't care about my looks - to go check my pictures, I can give you a short description right here: * I'm the same height as Taylor Momsen, my favorite celebrity. <3 * [redacted because holy shit this was bad] * I'm Jamacain and Scottish, and my hair is a sort of red-brown-blonde color. * [redacted because holy shit this was bad] So, are you looking for a biography of my life? I'm not sure I want to type that much. I guess I'll summarize it and make it even less of a biography by telling you things about myself:

I was born on January 2nd, 1996 in New York. I moved down to Florida with my family when I was 12, and have been here fro three years. (Can you calculate my age?) I'm bisexual, but I lean more towards girls. I may [redacted because holy shit this was bad]. My life revolves around music and sarcasm. My English 2 Honors teacher wrote in my yearbook to never forget the essence of my spark. Lol, no. My teacher's not Taylor Swift. She actually told me to never lose my sarcasm, and who am I to defy a teacher? .... I like to think that I'm humorous enough to start a YouTube webshow, but even though I have an HD Camcorder, I can never find the willpower to do such things. Maybe because I'm really sensitive and insecure, and I doubt I can take the hate comments....right. Anyway. People think I'm a player because of the rather extensive list of people I've been with. Honestly, I used to be a player. I've only been turned down once in my life, and only God knows why. Because it can't be my dashing good looks or humble personality, right? Oh my, looks like I've hit the irony button again. I'm actually in love right now, and I can't tell you who, just in case you jealous bitches go on a rampage.

Anyway, shall I post about my day? I'm in 7th period - Speech and Debate - right now. My friend Barbara and I are the only girls on this side of the room. It's not like we ever do anything in here. We're too effing smart, so we just keep quiet while the bumbling idiots around us try to keep up with the teacher, and stumble over words like oppression. I just showed her that. She laughed. x) Oh, um, the rest of the class is either playing games or watching The Great Debaters. I saw it in 8th grade. I don't need to see it again. The boy, Junior, isn't exactly eye candy. Finals begin tomorrow. Me and my science project parter don't have to take a Biology final, because we won the science project competition. (We - I - made an action movie about the project, pretending to be spies who had to solve the Problem, or else the White House would blow up.) Let's call her Erica. I'm scared to be alone with her, if we have to go to a different room, because she has a crush on me. And she doesn't even know I'm bisexual. She makes people move so she can sit next to me, touches me innapropriately, and told me that she knows that we're supposed to be soulmates. Save me. So here's my question of the day - supposing I write everyday and that any of you care - : What do you do when you want to make someone stop loving you, but you don't want to stop being their friend or hurt their feelings?

JUNE 3RD 2011

I'm only making this 'cause someone's making me. Let's have a recap of my day, shall we? 6:33 - woke up over an hour late. I didn't shower and merely tussled my hair, and I ate breakfast in the car. Got to school on time, despite what my dad thought. Realized I didn't have my Biology textbook which was due today. Panicked for a second, then decided not to give a shutzpah. In Latin 2, I spent like, ten minutes on my final. I had my AE do it for me, then I went to sleep in the chair on the other side of the room. It smelled funkeh. In Biology, I didn't have to take a final so I went to the Media Center with Jackie, and not Erica. Fank chu, Lawd for making her not come. So I sat down in the back, and Jackie - constant bully that she is - made me sit on the floor so that she could read comfortably on the place where I was lounging. It was cold in there. Um, nothing exciting really happened. My sister is annoying the hellzpah out me and I'm gonna kill her. Question of the day: Why isn't it possible to go back in time yet?

JUNE 6TH 2011

Hello, ladies and gents. So, today is the second day of finals and the beginning of the end. That's right. IT'S THE LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL!!!11!!111!! I took my English 2 Honors and Algebra 2 exams earlier today (actually I just finished my Algebra) and I have to say I was dissapointed by the lack of imagination by my teachers. I mean, these tests were a bit too easy- not that anything's wrong with that. But you ever get that feeling that once you believe something to be incredibly easy, turns out you got every damn thing wrong? Yeah. That's how I feel. Anywho, this guy I think is adorkable (and he's a skater, swoon!) opened the door for me and made a cute joke. Now before you say "oh dear Lord is this just another hopeless romantic?" let me tell you that he only does it for me. When anyone else is at the door, he just stares at it like it's the door to Armagaddeon or something. I have a question: Do any of you believe in alter ego's? Do you believe it's possible to seperate your body from yours? (Google!) I have one. My friend named her Cali, don't ask. But if any of you have had encounters with your AE's, PM me. We need to discuss something. But that wasn't my question of the day. The real question is: Is it possible for your Alter Ego to become their own person?

JUNE 7TH 2011

But I set fire to the rain Watched it pour as I touched your face Well, it burned while I cried 'Cause I heard it screaming out your name, your name When laying with you I could stay there Close my eyes, feel you here forever You and me together, nothing is better 'Cause there's a side to you that I never knew, never knew All the things you'd say, they were never true, never true And the games you's play, you would always win, always win I'm in love with this song. I cried hearing this girl sing it. I think I'm in love with her now. WHY CAN'T i HAVE A VOICE LIKE HERS, GOD??????? I'm gonna cry. This song makes me cry. Her voice. So damn angelic. Anyway, about my day: IT SUCKED. The only fun part was during homeroom when we were playing Scrabble, [redacted because holy shit this was bad]. Oh, and I talked to my friend Ella for the first time in months. I swear, I'm just going to keep promoting this girl. I wonder if I can get her number....sigh. If only she had red hair. LAWL. I'm just joking guys. My heart belongs to Caraquel. Yanno, when she wants it. Anywhom Question of the Day: What makes you laugh?

JUNE 8TH 2011

Tomorrow's the last day of school. I finished my Speech and Debate class early, so I'm coming here. I'm about to pour out my feelings here. I'm about to get deep. Like, 6 feet underground deep, brah. So, I think I'm in love. With the fucking world. I have this problem where I love too much. I suppose there's a gap in my heart from not getting enough love when I was a kid, or maybe my brain is just fucked up. I've fallen two feet, I've been dropped, I've had a glass cup of coffee fall on my head all before I finished kindergarten. Maybe that's why my brain is fucked up. There's a lump in my head, and I'm not sure if that's normal. I think it messed up my mouth-brain connection, where I don't say what I think. Like, if I think "Mr. John's class is nice." I'll end up saying. "Mr. John has a nice ass." or something, when the guy is like 1,000 years old and looks like Santa Claus. And the sad thing is- I can never remember saying it. Sometimes I think it's Cali saying these things, and other times I think I'm just special. I love my girlfriend, my ex, and my two best friends. (But I love Cara the most.) I get jealous beyond belief when they so much as mention another person. The thing is, I should only love my girlfriend. 'Cause she's the only one that (I think) even wants to marry me. And that's the only reason I'd ever be interested in a person- because I think they're worth it for the long haul. I really should get over all the others, because they're taken and they don't want me for the long run. They want me for the here and now, I guess. Or maybe they want me for the here and now so they can see what they'd be getting in the long run. I'm so confused and I'm hurting, but I just can't stop loving. My girlfriend's favorites on Twitter are chock full of gay boys telling her they love her. And I get jelly because I'm the first - and only - girl she's ever liked ('cause I'm just that rockin') but she could probably change their sexualities. My best friend, Cara, I just...I just love her. I'm crying right now IN EFFING PUBLIC because of how much it would kill me to not have her in my life, to not have her love. And if you are reading this Caraquel, I love you. I love you. I know Cali said she was helping me get over you, but I don't think it's possible. Every time I think about you...it's not possible to live without you. But yeah. I need to get my cranium checked. This just ain't realistic. I mean, whenever my friends come to me about their relationship problems, I think "Oi, if only it were possible for me to love you all." but mostly because I hate it when they cry over some chick who doesn't give two flying shits about anyone but herself. So, my questions of the day are: Is it possible to have fucked up the love gland in your brain? Is it possible to love more than one person? Is it possible to die from heartbreak?

[paulodebargelove]

The Sugarhill Gang - Rapper's Delight (Official Video) I said a hip hop Hippie to the hippie The hip, hip a hop, and you don't stop, a rock it out Bubba to the bang bang boogie, boobie to the boogie To the rhythm of the boogie the beatNow, what you hear is not a test I'm rappin' to the beat And me, the groove, and my friends are gonna try to move your feet See, I am Wonder Mike, and I'd like to say hello To the black, to the white, the red and the brown The purple and yellow, but first, I gottaBang bang, the boogie to the boogie Say up jump the boogie to the bang bang boogie Let's rock, you don't stop Rock the rhythm that'll make your body rock Well so far you've heard my voice but I brought two friends along And the next on the mic is my man Hank C'mon, Hank, sing that song, check it outWell, I'm Imp the Dimp, the ladies' pimp The women fight for my delight But I'm the grandmaster with the three MCs That shock the house for the young ladies And when you come inside, into the front You do the Freak, Spank, and do the Bump And when the sucker MC's try to prove a point We're Treacherous Trio, we're the serious jointA from sun to sun and day to day I sit down and write a brand new rhyme Because they say that miracles never cease I've created a devastating masterpiece I'm gonna rock the mic 'til you can't resist Everybody, I say it goes like this Well, I was coming home late one dark afternoon A reporter stopped me for an interview She said she's heard stories and she's heard fables That I'm vicious on the mic and the turntable This young reporter I did adore So I rocked some vicious rhymes like I never did before She said, "damn, fly guy, I'm in love with you The Casanova legend must have been true" I said, "by the way, baby, what's your name?" Said, "I go by name of Lois Lane""And you could be my boyfriend, you surely can Just let me quit my boyfriend called Superman" I said, "he's a fairy, I do suppose Flyin' through the air in pantyhose He may be very sexy, or even cute But he looks like a sucker in a blue and red suit" I said, "you need a man man who's got finesse And his whole name across his chest He may be able to fly all through the night But can he rock a party 'til the early light? He can't satisfy you with his little worm But I can bust you out with my super sperm!" I go do it, I go do it, I go do it, do it, do it An' I'm here an' I'm there, I'm Big Ban Hank, I'm everywhereJust throw your hands up in the air And party hardy like you just don't care Let's do it, don't stop, y'all, a tick tock, y'all, you don't stop! Go ho-tel, mo-tel, whatcha gonna do today? (say what?) I'm gonna get a fly girl, gonna get some spank, drive off in a def OJEverybody go, "ho-tel, mo-tel, Holiday Inn" You say if your girl starts actin' up, then you take her friend I say skip, dive, what can I say? I can't fit 'em all inside my OJ So I just take half, and bust 'em out I give the rest to Master Gee so he can shock the houseI said M-A-S, T-E-R, a G with a double E I said I go by the unforgettable name Of the man they call the Master Gee Well, my name is known all over the world By all the foxy ladies and the pretty girls I'm goin' down in history As the baddest rapper there ever could be Now I'm feelin' the highs and you're feelin' the lows The beat starts gettin' into your toes You start poppin' your fingers and stompin' your feet And movin' your body while while you're sitting in your seatAnd then damn! Ya start doin' the freak, I said Damn! Right outta your seat Then you throw your hands high in the air Ya rockin' to the rhythm, shake your derriere Ya rockin' to the beat without a care With the sureshot MCs for the affair Now, I'm not as tall as the rest of the gang But I rap to the beat just the sameI got a little face, and a pair of brown eyes All I'm here to do, ladies, is hypnotize Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on on'n'on The beat don't stop until the break of dawn Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on on'n'on Like a hot buttered pop da pop da pop dibbie dibbie Pop da pop pop, don't you dare stop Come alive y'all, gimme whatcha gotI guess by now you can take a hunch And find that I am the baby of the bunch But that's okay, I still keep in stride 'Cause all I'm here to do is just wiggle your behind Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on on'n'on The beat don't stop until the break of dawn Singin' on'n'n'on'n'on on'n'on Rock rock, y'all, throw it on the floorI'm gonna freak you here, I'm gona freak you there I'm gonna move you outta this atmosphere 'Cause I'm one of a kind and I'll shock your mind I'll put TNT in your behind. I said One, two, three, four, come on, girls, get on the floor A-come alive, y'all, a-gimme whatcha got 'Cause I'm guaranteed to make you rock I said one, two, three, four, tell me, Wonder Mike What are you waiting for?I said a hip hop The hippie to the hippie The hip hip a hop, and you don't stop, a rock it To the bang bang boogie, say up jump the boogie To the rhythm of the boogie, the beat A skiddleebebop, we rock, scooby doo And guess what, America, we love you'Cause you rocked and a rolled with so much soul You could rock 'til a hundred and one years old I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast But we like hot butter on our breakfast toast Rock it up, Baby Bubba! Baby Bubba to the boogie da bang bang da boogie To the beat, beat, it's unique Come on everybody and dance to the beat!Have you ever went over a friends house to eat And the food just ain't no good? I mean the macaroni's soggy, the peas are mushed And the chicken tastes like wood So you try to play it off like you think you can By saying that you're full And then your friend says, "mama, he's just being polite He ain't finished, uh-uh, that's bull!"So your heart starts pumpin' and you think of a lie And you say that you already ate And your friend says "man, there's plenty of food" So you pile some more on your plate While the stinky food's steamin', your mind starts to dreamin' Of the moment that it's time to leave And then you look at your plate and your chicken's slowly rottin' Into something that looks like cheeseOh so you say "that's it, I gotta leave this place I don't care what these people think I'm just sittin' here makin' myself nauseous With this ugly food that stinks" So you bust out the door while it's still closed Still sick from the food you ate And then you run to the store for quick relief From a bottle of Kaopectate And then you call your friend two weeks later To see how he has been And he says, "I understand about the food Baby Bubba, but we're still friends" With a hip hop the hippie to the hippie The hip hip a hop, a you don't stop the rockin' To the bang bang boogie Say up jump the boogie to the rhythm of the boogie the beatFonte: LyricFindCompositores: Nile Rodgers / Bernard Edwards

November 10, 1979 - 40 Years Ago Today: Sugarhill Gang debuted at No. 84 on the Billboard Hot 100 Chart with their single, "Rapper's Delight." This was the first rap single to chart on the Hot 100 and it was written by Bernard Edwards and Nile Rodgers of Chic fame. The self-titled album from which it came was produced by Sylvia Robinson, who owned Sugar Hill Records and had her own hit singles including "Love Is Strange" as one-half of Mickey & Sylvia and the 1973 smash hit, "Pillow Talk" which was considered controversial for its time. "Rapper's Delight" used the rhythm track from Chic's "Good Times" which had hit No. 1 three months prior to this debut. "Rapper's Delight" peaked at No. 36 on the Hot 100 on January 12, 1980, No. 4 on the Billboard R&B Chart and No. 14 on the Billboard Disco Top 100