#up mom when everyones just trying to help but shes so fixated on this thing that's clearly causing her distress but shes just screaming at

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

Saw alotta dis so uhh.. Is aether an option by any chance?

The creator had:

Twin blonds

WC: 900~

I actually really like aether, I tend to characterize him as rather wholesome, at least in his traveler form.

I'm sure that traveler aether would be so much shier about his attraction that you would have to start any intimate interaction while abyss aether is more forward with his attraction.

“Thanks for the help traveler, without your help we wouldn't be able to hold the celebration” Aether is famously known across teyvat for how helpful he is, always so eager to take the load off of anyone's shoulders.

“let me give you a reward"

“Hm? Ningguang already gave me the reward” looks at you curiously, maybe there was a mistake while arranging this? After all, the commission was a last second thing.

“I know that, I meant a more personal reward, only if you wanted” finally noticing the innuendo he swallows hard, swiftly looking over at paimon to find her swallowing canapes and desserts but seemingly the time he spent thinking about it made you think it was a refusal “oh, well, nevermind, let's enjoy the party” you pass bye him towards the entrance but he stops you, a firm hand around your arm.

“I didn't mean it like I don't want, I just… Didn't expect it, I guess” seeing him so cute you can't help yourself and lean forward, your lips half open, an invitation that he soon takes.

A while later you both appear in the party, alibis pointing to each other being somewhere different.

“didnt expect you to come here so soon” as you open the door you see the prince standing in the middle of your room, an almost indistinguishable shape amongst the shadows.

“I would say the same. I would have expected you to stay in the party for a while longer, your grace”

Your hands signal a burgundy splatter on the top “drunkard's accidents. I came to clean myself” you walk the the wardrobe, pulling another tunic from there “I also saw a hydro mage in the garden from one of the second floor windows and guessed your would be here or arrive soon”

He sighs sitting down on your bed “I held some hope they would be more careful with this mission but seems I was wrong. I hoped I would be able to talk with you when you came after the party”

“almost everyone is drunk and I greeted everyone important, I can spare some minutes"

“I will make sure to use them wisely then”

“Won't you even tell me where your lover is from?” Nahida is sitting criss-cross playing stacking cubes with the blond children, a set of twins.

“I’m sorry but I won't” you see her shoulders slouch while she builds a block tower with the twins, almost disappointed.

“Could it be kaveh? They are blond like him” she pops up an idea, seeing how fixated the girl twin was with building the tallest column and how the boy was focus.

“Fine, will tell you he isn't from Sumeru” even if she seemed bummed out about it at least she sighed and stretched her legs.

“Well… technically his mom is fontanian now so maybe...”

“It's not kaveh.”

“Finee”

“Such energetic toddlers” Raiden watches from the top of the stairs, two eleven month olds trying to learn how to walk and repetitively failing and rising to try again.

“Yes, I had to get a nanny for each if them, whenever I left them in their playpen at least one would sneak out and start crawling around, I was worried they would try to go up the stairs and hurt themselves”

“Ah!” The boy yelps as he manages to stand up for a second but falls down after attempting his first step. Before he starts wailing his sister pats his back.

“ I will miss him” Nahida pouts, her eyes almost glassing over. The twins had reunited at last and left, not without giving all a hug, yours being particularly long and specially melancholic.

“You know” you say as you put your hand on her head, the archons standing alongside you “we will have something to remind us of him” she looks up at you curiously with her wet eyes.

“indeed, the changes they produced in our nations won't be easily forgotten and we will be able to remember him because of it”

“That might be true, zhongli, but I meant something else, something that will grow alongside us” nobody said a word, the meaning totally understood by all of them. Nahida hugs your leg and zhongli rests a hand on your shoulder blade.

“Prince did you manage to make the purest grace to agre with our plan and make the nations surrender?” a cryo mage speaks the next morning, rubbing his hands together.

“I didn't manage to cramp that in, when their grace wasn't present people started looking for them”

“I understand…” even if he wanted to doubt him what he did in that while he knew that wouldn't end nicely for him.

“Aetherrr”paimon whines over his shoulder, tugging the loose hairs behind his ears “we spent 20 minutes looking at toys”

“I want to give nice and thoughtful gifts to their grace's children” aether ignores her, still wondering if buying more furniture for their dollhouse or a Natlan sport ball. Both of them play doll house and football but which would be best?

“Just give them whatever, I doubt anyone would spend so much thinking about their gift. Just because they are twins and you are a twin doesn't mean you share any special link”

“yeah, you are right” it's not because of that reason that he is so focused but at least it works as a common excuse of seeing himself and his lost sister in them.

“Now will you hurry?”

“Haha, no”

#genshin impact #gi #sagau #self aware genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin aether #aether x reader #aether #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact headcanons #genshin x reader #genshin x gender neutral reader

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#ugh. the fucking struggle of a thing i will not talk about. its just an off shoot of one of my many #obessive compulsive tendencies. it just makes me think of my dad. like hes also a fucking anxious person but hes like. i have the thoughts #but then i dont let them control me so its not an issue. and he knos i get caught up on the structure and identification of problems so #hes always like. its only an issue if its like ruining ur life. and hes right and i definitely meet the standards of both of those things #bc im fucking thinking abt these things constantly. its in my head literally all the time. every second of the day #and i mean i guess this specific thing isnt ruining my life but it certainly isnt helpful and in combo with everything else my quality of #life is not what it could b. idk it just feels all empty which is y i became a fucking workaholic #bc i just get so fucking bored stuck in these stupid patterns that at least i can make myseld useful as i drive myself nuts #it also doesnt help that im still trying to unfuck my leg and not being very successful bc theres this fucking voice in my head like #keep moving. u cant sit down. walk around. dont stop. dont stop. dont stop. i can feel the muscles getting irritated again #its unbearable bc it doesn't really even hurt. i just kno im fucking it up for myself and i have all this excess energy that i cant get rid #of bc i cant run. anyway its just irritating #i probably triggered myself by watching the bear all day lol. its so good but it reminds me of working in a shitty banquet hall when my #brain was on fire. and theyve got that toxic workahoism that i so desperately cling to. and in a weird way i can relate tho their fucked #up mom when everyones just trying to help but shes so fixated on this thing that's clearly causing her distress but shes just screaming at #them. like i mean i have insight into my issues and i try not to let them affect anyone but me but its so hard when its like. i have to do #this thing. i have to do it. i kno its bad. i kno its fucked up but shut the fuck up and let me do this. u dont fucking understand #but i wouldn't say that bc i kno its irrational. ugh. i also have to go to a lab dinner tomorrow. maybe #no time has been listed so idk. its for my leaving so im technically the focus. hate that for me. whatever. itll b fine #at least the place is within walking distance and its like less than 3 weeks until i leave #unrelated

[torialefay]

Hi! Can I request prompt 23 with Felix please? Thank you<3

home will always be here too 🏠📍

felix x reader (f); emotional SMUT

• it had been an especially hard day for felix.

• he wouldn't admit it, he never did. but you could tell nonetheless.

• today was his mom's birthday, but the best he could do is settle for a short facetime call. he had a full day of schedules stacked up that he couldn't just abandon.

• of course he sent the usual- some flowers, a card, and a new item from her favorite brand.

• he got a little reassurance knowing that he could at least give her that.

• but nothing could replace the feeling of actually BEING there.

• nothing could replace being home.

• "i just feel like such a bad son," felix finally confided in you as you both lay next to each other on the bed.

• it took him all day, but there he finally admitted it was bothering him.

• "you're not a bad son, baby," you reassured him, turning over to face him. "you did what you could... you know she understands you can't always be there in person. that's just part of life now that we're growing up."

• "i know... it's just not fair to anyone," he stared up at the ceiling.

• you scooted your body closer until you were laid on top of his bare chest. the skin-on-skin contact always made you feel so safe, and so much warmer- like you were closer to him in some way. you knew he felt the same.

• it was the unspoken comfort that you gave to each other- lying in the bed in solitude, both unclothed. it presented the barest, rawest parts of yourselves to each other, and at the end of the day, that's all you really needed.

• "you're right, it's not fair," you whispered up to him. "but that doesn't mean that there isn't a lot to look forward to. think of how good it's going to feel when you finally get to see everyone and celebrate together," you tried your best to give some encouragement.

• felix didn't utter a word back, he just kept looking upward, fixated on the ceiling fan.

• "baby, it is okay. i promise."

• you nudged yourself upward now even closer, until your face was resting in the crook of his neck. with this new point, you could tell what was really going on.

• felix wasn't just zoning off or trying to block things out... he was crying. silent, tiny tears. you felt one as it rolled off of his cheek and hit your own.

• "oh baby, it's okay! no, don't cry, don't cry," you moved your hand up to cup the opposite side of his face and wipe away a few stray tears.

• he couldn't help but break out into a full sob at your actions.

• you waited patiently and rubbed your hand into his hair as he turned his whole body towards you and continued his cries.

• you knew felix. there was nothing you could do until he had cried out what he needed to.

• you tangled your bare legs around his, trying to cocoon him. you wanted him to feel safe.

• "sh sh sh, it's okay, it's okay," you whispered, rubbing your hand up and down the back of his neck and onto his back and arms.

• you gave him a quick peck on the forehead.

• "what are you feeling baby? talk to me," you said.

• he took a few moments to calm himself, tears starting to slow.

• "i just really miss home," he took a big gulp of air, trying to pacify himself. he sniffled, trying to keep another tear from spilling out.

• "i know you do," you whispered, looking up at him. "but just know that home will still be there anytime you can go back. it isn't going to go anywhere." you pulled his face into your neck.

• "and think about all the people you have here as well. so many people that love you and care about you. who just want you to be happy..." you kissed his shoulder.

• "and well... i love you more than words. i'll be right here with you. no matter where you are in the world, your home will always be here too."

• you could feel felix smile into your neck. the tears had stopped- you would have felt them if they hadn't.

• no more sniffles either.

• neither of you needed to say anything. you both just enjoyed the others' company and listened to each other breath.

• "i love you so much, you know that?" felix finally spoke out, voice dark and raspy after his crying spell.

• you let out a giggle. "yes, i know. and you know i love you too," you smiled into his hair.

• suddenly, he moved his body back up until his head was now resting above yours, pulling your face straight into his chest.

• "i think i could get used to this," he breathed out, running a few fingers now along the side of your arm.

• "what exactly is 'this'?" you laughed.

• "well, you said my home will always be here too... with you."

• felix's words were so simple, but they always took your breath away. you smiled like a fool, not being able to say anything more. you just squeeze his body tighter.

• he let out a chuckle. "i really mean that, you know," he moved his body down a bit until his face was directly in front of yours, locking your eyes into his.

• he pushed a few stray bits of hair behind your ear and held the side of your face. "you're right. you're my home too."

• he leaned in to plant a firm, but loving kiss to your lips.

• you felt your heart swell as you began to melt into it, clutching onto him as you let yourself throw in fully.

• as he began to swirl his tongue around your own, you let out a small moan. you couldn't help it. his touch was just so pure, so firm.

• he must have liked it, as he mirrored back with a smirk, and a firm grabbing of your ass, harshly pushing you further to him.

• with this new tight contact, you could feel his bare bulge pressed taut with the front of your pussy. he was so hard already.

• feeling how ready he was already took you aback and you lost your breath for a few seconds. felix picked up on this and smiled, taking the opportunity to rut his hips up and down to give you some pressure. and god it felt delicious.

• he continued to kiss you deeply, as if his life depended on it. it was so whole-heartedly consuming, you wished you would just fall into him.

• before long, felix's hips picked up the pace and you rubbed yourself against him as hard as you could. he let out a small moan in response, making quick work to move his mouth down to your neck.

• he began to kiss and lick down until he reached your collarbone, where he started to gently suck.

• the whole time, you couldn't stop bucking your hips up into him, and it was driving him absolutely insane.

• he moved his free hand down the side of your body, making sure to hold on to each curve as he went. he rested over each nipple, giving them a light circle as he went, teasingly.

• you let out a gasp of air as he did, making him pull his mouth off of you momentarily.

• "feels good baby?"

• "mmm, feels so good lixie," you cooed back. you assumed he liked that answer as he automatically went back to your neck and started to leave a new love bite, rubbing slightly quicker circles around your nipple.

• after a minute of trying to endure his torture, you couldn't help but writhe underneath him. you needed more of his touch.

• you reached for his hand and brought it down to your pussy where you had been aggressively rubbing onto him since he had started.

• he got the hint and instantly began to go for what you liked- small, light up and down motions along your clit.

• he thought he knew how wet you were from rutting against him this whole time, but he swore he'd never felt you like this before.

• as he placed his finger pads along your clit and slowly began to rub, you felt yourself tense up, almost pulling back. felix got a kick out of watching you.

• "relax sweetheart, let me take care of you for a second." he continued to rub lightly in silence, allowing you to soak in the smallest of his movements.

• "ahh just like that," you whispered out as he worked your clit up to it's most sensitive level. his pace felt amazing, just the right amount to get you where you needed to be.

• you felt your breathing quicken as the pleasure was slowly setting in. you could almost taste it.

• "mm let me add a little bit to it now," he said quietly, lowering his body just a bit so that he could angle himself correctly and slowly insert himself beside you.

• you felt your eyes roll back at the new filling sensation mixed with the light pressure he was still giving your clit.

• "you feel too fucking good baby," he groaned out, giving you slow but quickening strokes.

• he began to let out a low growl with each stroke. he was meticulously placing each one.

• you felt your toes start to tingle from the feeling of felix on your clit, growing more and more sensitive with each thrust adding more pressure.

• you used your arms to cling on to him as tightly as you could, throwing your hips into the same motion as him.

• he took that as his cue to push his head into yours and join your lips together like before. this was his favorite thing to do- to kiss you while you gave in to him.

• his mouth moved aggressively across yours, making sure to take in every inch of your lips. he bit and licked and tugged even harder as he picked up the pace, both in his thrusts and how quickly he was going on your clit.

• that's when it hit you. you weren't going to be able to last much longer

• "lixie, lixie!" you moaned, pulling your lips out of his clutch. "i'm gonna cum baby, i'm gonna cum."

• be looked at you full of love and lust in his eyes, half hooded. "go ahead sweetheart. focus on cumming for me. it's only me and you. only me and you," he whispered, making sure to press on you with everything he had. he didn't dare change how good he was making you feel.

• he felt his tip start to get extremely sensitive as well, as he let out a thick moan and threw his head back.

• "fuck baby, i fucking love you," he growled, bouncing you off of him hard. "you're so perfect. you're all i need, i swear. all i'll ever need."

• with just the right hit, it sent you into overdrive. it felt like a jolt, tingles starting at the bottom of your foot, running all the way up your leg, and the sensitivity now exploding out of your core through the rest of your body.

• you could do nothing but gasp and arch your back, brain going fuzzy while trying to focus on felix in front of you.

• "ahh fuck," he yelled, feeling you convulse around him. "i'm gonna cum, ah fuck.. fuck..." he panted hastily.

• as if he couldn't get there soon enough, he latched himself back onto your lips one final time, needing to feel them on him while he reached his climax. one hard pound after another and he was finally going over the edge, feeling the vibrations of your moans finishing him. he mimicked he moans right back as you felt his whole body twitch inside of you.

• he couldn't say anything, couldn't do anything, just kept his lips attached to yours as you had both finished riding out your highs.

• as he finished, he slowed his thrusts until they were at a dead stop. that didn't stop him from keeping his tongue off of yours though.

• after a good minute or two of stillness, just reveling in the deep, slow kisses, he pulled off for a moment.

• "i was serious about what i said, y/n. you're all i'll ever need. you're my home now."

• "you've always been my home," you smiled.

• with that, he let himself go right back to his comfort spot. with his cock still resting inside of you, he connected his lips to yours, not even moving, just letting them rest where they felt right. where they felt at home.

#felix smut #lee felix #felix #skz smut #stray kids smut #skz felix #felix x reader #stray kids felix #felix fanfic #felix scenarios #felix imagines #felix oneshot #skz imagines #skz oneshots #skz x reader #stray kids imagines

[buckybarnesss]

I was literally thinking about all the fics where Stiles is like "and then Derek pushed me around 🥺" like... Derek did the steering wheel thing because Stiles made him STRIP FOR A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD BOY.

I started to read an article that opened up by criticizing the "physically abusive sterek ship" and backed out immediately, like you people need to remember that the show exists and that is not based in reality.

Pack mom Stiles.... gah. Stiles would never help Isaac with his homework. Derek would!! But Stiles? Hell no.

Stiles is literally a fucking creep. He walks around telling everyone that he loves Lydia. He has no boundaries. I love him that way. He's a snarky little asshole who would definitely just show up in Derek's apartment one day and Derek would be like "how did you get in here?" And then Stiles reveals that he pretended to be a doordash driver with a delivery and then picked the lock on Derek's front door.

fun fact my url before this one was creeperderek. i am fond of that url. he of loitering at tree lines and creepily disappearing into shadows in the boy's locker room for no fucking reason.

stiles does have a lack of boundaries and really intense anxiety about the people he cares about.

he listens to the police scanner regularly and monitors his father's diet due to his intense, almost uncontrollable anxiety about his father. he's terrified his dad will die and has an intense fear it will because of him.

all of that of course stems from his mother's death when he was so, so young and how claudia in her cognitive decline blamed stiles and accused him of trying to kill her.

this anxiety also extends to scott and melissa to various degrees due to their significance to the stability of his life for so long and why he's irrationally scared to tell his father the truth despite knowing if the sheriff understood what was really happening it would help more than hinder.

than there's other things like how he has a copy to the key to the mccall house that melissa isn't aware of and it's made pretty clear that stiles took the imitative. scott didn't give it to him.

scott doesn't seem all that bothered by this but scott is one of the few people who knows and mostly understand stiles. they live in each other's pockets. scott would be oddly touched but also be like bro what in the fuck? because really, stiles what the fuck?

people find that fucking weird and creepy.

it truly wouldn't surprise me at all if stiles had a copy of the loft key and derek knew he did and said nothing about it because these two are weird little freaks that probably have frequently creeped on each other.

we do get indications they speak outside of what we're shown. two little maladjusted bastards sharing one brain cell to creep on each other.

if stiles showed up in derek's loft derek probably wouldn't even be surprised. in fact he'd tell stiles he took longer than expected, peter did it better and he sucked.

it's so funny that fandom developed the idea that derek sneaks into stiles's bedroom all the time via the window and we literally never see this. it never canonically happens. though it's not said how derek got inside in wolf's bane so maybe a window but frankly i find it more plausible derek just, you know, broke in the house via a door.

putting a read more on this because i had a lot to say lol

stiles and lydia. ooh boy.

sentiment within fandom swayed a lot on these two and i've seen the common argument that sterek fans don't like stydia as a paring because it's not gay, or something to which i say lol no. i, personally, don't ship them romantically because for like 2 seasons stiles didn't see her as person and she mostly ignored his entire existence.

he fixated on lydia in the 3rd grade which would've been around the time claudia declined and than passed away. he held onto that crush tightly, put lydia on a pedestal making her more into an ideal than a person.

there's moments where we see them genuinely connect but there's so many scenes between the two of them until like season 3 that are cringe and uncomfortable. my main issue is that lydia never really says much about it either.

it's like until she becomes a real girl to stiles her position doesn't matter even when we see her be uncomfortable or weirded out around stiles.

we actually do see stiles and derek develop boundaries with each other. stiles uses derek to literally queerbait danny in wolf's bane. both derek and danny seem to realize this as it occurs and derek pointedly, purposefully retaliates with violence which isn't great but it makes it clear that derek is not okay with what stiles did and a line had been crossed. s2 has derek also indicate to stiles it's not okay to touch without permission.

remember the finger tippy taps stiles's gives derek when boyd dies? that's stiles having learned derek's physical boundaries over 3 seasons so that he is able to offer him comfort in a awful, terrible moment.

in conclusion derek and stiles aren't abusive and it's odd people latched onto that idea. they're abrasive assholes to each other and lack boundaries in the beginning because their maladjusted people for various reasons while also just being two little freaks about each other.

#my blog #thoughts on teen wolf #sterek #otp: you need me to survive

[ladyloveandjustice]

I liveblog the Odyssey (The Liveblogyssey)

'I've been listening to and reading The Odyssey (Emily Wilson's translation) and I've been rambling a lot to my partner, so I thought I would also liveblog my first impressions! I read parts of The Odyssey in high school and college but never the whole thing start to finish.

Athena spoils half the plot right off, I mean obviously I knew it already, but still. We start near the end of the story with Odysseus trapped on Calypso's island, Telemachus really upset that the suitors are EATING ALL THEIR SHEEP, and the beginning follows Telemachus around as he travels around to try to learn about his dad and if he's alive. Which... we know he is so that takes a little of the tension out of it.

(Seriously, Telemachus is very fixated on the sheep thing. I get that it's a big source of food but maybe you should be a little more concerned about your mom fending off 108 suitors bud).

Athena in disguise goes to meet and accompany him, appearing as an older man, and this translation is very simple and accessible (though there are definitely moments of beautiful prose) but this sometimes leads to really awkward lines like Telemachus telling Athena in disguise "I will give you a precious, pretty treasure as a keepsake to mark our special friendship" which like. are you hitting on him Telemachus you just said you think he's fatherly.

Telemachus is going thru it though. so you can't help but feel bad for him. "My mother says I am his son, but I can't be sure [...} I wish I were the son of someone lucky, who can grow old at home, instead the most unlucky man alive is said to be my father." Like that one of the times you feel the connection going back thousand of years so fiercely, the idea of having no connection to your father because you've never met him and he doesn't even feel like your dad, just a story, and too bad you can't be the son of someone who's around.

Meanwhile, a super unintentionally funny lin from young Mac is "The poets are not to blame for how things are, Blame Zeus." which yeah, that sums up most of Greek myth doesn't it! (also very funny of Homer to be like "be nice to poets, they're cool".) He also tells his own Mom to go back to the kitchen so he can assert to the suitors he's in charge and there's a man in this house, but we are reading a story from 8th century BC so.

Anyway he goes around with Athena travelling and learning about his dad, and honestly, the Odyssey is so funny. Love the part where Nestor is like "oh if only Athena favored you as she did her father" and Telemachus is like “Yeah Athena’s not on my side” :/ and she's just. sitting there with him and says”hmm are you sure I think she maybe is probably"

(and then she's like "btw to gods don't control who lives and who dies TELEMACHUS we can't even protect our mortal loved ones (but please ignore all the times we've actively killed people) and also! also! I think your dad should be grateful to go on a cool quest and be alive when he could have just died the second he left Troy, think about THAT!!!)

then she just randomly turns into a bird and leaves after ensuring Telemachus has good sleeping arrangements. Telemachus never reacts to this, everyone else is just like "omg Athena!!" he says nothing I assume he was just standing there in slackjawed shock for the next couple of hours and going over all the embarrassing things he said.

Also we get to see Helen! And I knew from earlier Greek studies that people today acting like she was dumb just because men found her attractive was misogynist nonsense. But now I get to be extra mad because the woman isn't just not dumb, she's really intelligent and observant!

Not only does she immediately figure out who Telemachus is because she saw him when he was a newborn (how??) and relays that during the Trojan war she was the only one able to recognize odysseus when he came to her place in disguise and gave him intel, but most importantly she talks about "the day the Greeks marched off to troy, their minds fixated on war and violence. They made my face the cause that hounded them". Just subtly calling the whole army out. She knows they didn't actually go to war for her. She knows she was just an excuse, and a weak one at that. She knows they wanted this war, they wanted this violence.

So yeah, Helen is smart as hell! Screw that "Everyone wanted Helen of Sparta I wanted someone a little smarter" shit from Epic, sexist nonsense, I'm glad that song was cut.

She also mentions that "Aphrodite made her go crazy" when she agreed to run off, which could be literally true (Aphrodite did tend to do that) or a clever way to protect her reputation after leaving her husband.

Helen also has drugs, which I imagine is a big reason everyone liked her. The total package. But uh, she also does drugs everyone's drinks without apparently telling them. With what sounds like superpowered magic weed or something, to make them mellow and calm and erase anxiety and depression. It says "Whoever drinks this mixture for the bowl will shed no tears that day not even if her mother or father should die" which uh actually seems kind of dangerous! But Telemachus is goin' thru it, so maybe he could use it. but apparently it doesn't work (or takes a long time to kick in} because Telemachus gets upset anyway and says things like "This makes it worse! Courage could not save my father's life!" and wants to go to bed. (PS she got the weed from Egypt, and it's nice that the story is very complementary about Egyptians, calling them the "healer's people").

And then we've finished Telemachus's depression session and get back to Penelope. THE SAGA CONTINUES IN PART 2.

#the liveblogyssey #nev reads the odyssey #the oddysey #telemachus #athena #epic the musical

[visenyaism]

Share with us your Shiera headcanons please 🙏

since shiera is such a nothing character who just happens to have a really cool premise i do have a lot because you can just make stuff up (apart from my goofy shiera hightower theory). so here’s a big ol list under the cut:

-raised primarily by her half brother daeron since her mother died having her and her father died when she was an infant and seeing as how her mom had dubious origins (maybe from lys but no family, maybe a witch) she had literally nowhere else to go. Also because as a GIRL bastard she was just less of a threat. Because she’s just there on the goodwill of her brother the king, internalized from a young age that the only way to get what she wanted was to be extremely self-interested and perform her part very well.

-spent most of her childhood in the library reading political theory and trying to Learn Real Magic to get closer to her mother. fixation on appearance and performance led to her picking glamour magicks as her primary field of study, which is also what she heard they’re into in Lys.

-Spent a lot of time with Aerys I as a result because they had similar special interests and his general disinterest in women meant he was one of the few people who was not Weird to her as a teenager so they just stayed research buddies.

-Everyone at court’s preoccupation with her physical appearance from a weirdly young age (thank u george rr martin very normal and cool) led to teenage shiera just deciding she can say or do pretty much whatever she wants within the confines of the social role she’s been assigned. None of it matters unless she wants it to so the worst thing she can be is bored.

-So as a result of that she manipulates people when she gets bored but can you blame her if it’s the only way to get what she wants as a bastard and they’re probably not listening to what she has to say anyways and also making people fight is really entertaining?

-Not being taken seriously as a bastard AND a girl helps her realize that the entire game of thrones is in fact a made up game—one she enjoys her and her loved ones winning, but not something to stake her whole personhood in—and her family are not literal dragons or serious people.

-Unlike the other great bastards shiera is not wrapped up in the existential identity crisis about whether or not she is a True Targaryen because she’s never been interested in being anyone other than herself. Terminally bored whenever Bloodraven or Aegor or Daemon start doing this.

-Blackfyre rébellion happened when she was sixteen so of course she backed Daeron over her annoying other brother. Definitely made Bloodraven’s arrows that took him and his kids out.

-the blood magic thing WAS true. shiera was maybe not as practiced in it as her notable sisterniece danelle lothston but she did partake

-Eventually fell out with Bloodraven because it was really fun at first to be cooking up schemes nonstop to hold the realm down under Aerys, but then she realized that’s the only thing he wanted to do for the entire rest of his life. and the game is just going to repeat itself over and over again so she got out of there because that’s soooooo critically boring and there are other things in the world.

-accelerationist in that she does not believe things can actually get better for people under a targaryen king unless circumstances get bad enough that the people rise up and take back power, but not in the sense that she’s interested in being the one sparking that. She just has very little faith in the system at large.

-i don’t think she’s quaithe but definitely she spent the rest of her life travelling learning new magic and stuff. Not alive by the main series but no known records of death, she just sort of fell off the map eventually.

#shiera seastar #love the idea that shiera is the LEAST dramatic great bastard #AND she’s a silver jewelry girlie. taste! #they gave her main character eyeballs and then no personality except Hot. george you gotta quit doing that #she just has a lot of potential to have been bonkers as a great bastard with no other parent who also wasn’t around for aegon iv. but yknow

[high-functioning-fang1rl]

One Side Of The Knife! AU

What if instead of possessing her, Chucky, still fixated on the future he once thought he had “raising” Nica as his own, feels a paternal and possessive/protective kind of ownership of her. After killing her family, Chucky manipulates Nica’s trauma and strained relationship with her family and lies- he tells her he’s her biological father, twisting the story in an attempt to get Nica as part of his ever-growing group of lackeys- err, Family.

* * * * *

“Just fucking do it already.” Nica grit out, her voice wavering slightly.“Get it over with.” Stuck in her chair, the straight jacket dug into her sides as she leaned as far away as she could from the face of her nightmares.

The redheaded killer doll tilted his head, his plastic features amused. “If I wanted you dead, you’d be tits up by now. I was never gonna kill you, Nica. I came to make things right!”

Shuddering, her eyes unwillingly darted over the brutalized remains of Carlos and Dr. Foley, sparking with indignation as she fixed them back on Chucky.“You call this making things right?” she demanded incredulously.

“I never wanted you to take the fall for what I did. I just couldn’t help myself! I was just so angry at your Mom. She ruined everything!”

A breathless sob left Nica. “Stop.”

Mercilessly, her tormentor continued.“And I couldn’t stand to see how your sister- how everyone in that fucking house- treated you. They didn’t appreciate you, Nica.” He took a jerky step forward, and the helpless woman flinched. “I told you. We’re family!”

Her eyes closed, falling shut against the pain, the memories assaulting her all at once; the thunder, her sister, Alice-

* * * * *

Sprawled out on the floor of her home, Nica’s mind had felt as broken as her body. As the impossibly still alive Charles Lee Ray stalked towards her in doll form, she could only think of one question. “Why us?”

“Didn’t your mother ever mention me? I’m an old friend of the family.” the rough, sinister voice sounded bitter.

Nica shook her head, still trying to understand the human Charles’ presence in the old family videos she’d seen mere hours- but what felt like a lifetime- ago.

“I can’t say I’m surprised; most people want it kept secret when they…step outside of their marriage.” the doll taunted. “But when she decided to have you, well…” he shook his head. “I begged her to be a part of your life, promised her everything she could ever hope for. But she was a selfish bitch- selfish enough to keep her own child away from her father.”

As the weight of the words registered in her brain, nausea swirled in Nica’s gut, her head spinning. “No-” she choked out.

Oblivious to his victim’s distress, he shrugged. “I guess she had planned on Daniel taking my place.” His voice lowered into a growl. “But no one replaces me. So I did what I had to do.”

Tears blurred her vision, and she hastily blinked them away. “You’re lying.” she said, more for her own benefit and sanity.

“Why would I lie to you, Nica? Any father worth his salt would fight to be in his kid’s life. And she took that from me! From US!”

As if Nica’s world wasn’t shattering from underneath her, he told her how he’d killed Daniel, drowning him and staging it as an accident, holding her mother captive in an attempt to keep their “family” together. With growing horror, Nica listened as he apologized for stabbing Sarah through the stomach when she betrayed him, forgetting in his rage that he may not only hurt Sarah in his quest to make her pay.

“You did this to me.” She realized with a sinking sense of certainty.

“No, Nica. Your Mommy-“ he bit the word out sarcastically “-did this to me. To us. She betrayed me. Got me killed. Took your father! It took me twenty five years but believe me, it was worth the wait. Twenty five years. Since then, a lot of families have come and gone: The Barclays, the Tilly’s, but Nica, your family was always my favorite. And now, you’re the last one standing…So to speak.” He laughed. “And after all this time, we can finally be a family!”

* * * * *

Grounding herself back to the present, Nica weakly protested. “We’re not.”

The doll laughed. “Come on, Nica- didn’t you ever wonder why you never fit in with your family? Why you always wondered what your Dad was like, why you were treated differently? Your mother never accepted the fact that you were mine, that you were damaged. We were the ones she never accepted, she threw away.”

Nica did her best to ignore the thousands of instances that came to mind where she had been ignored, left out, or misunderstood. The numerous times Sarah refused to talk about Daniel or tell Nica about her father, or treated Barb as the favored sibling.

“But…you kill innocent people!” she burst out, looking around at the carnage around her.

Cackling, Chucky waved his arm around. “I wouldn’t call any of them ‘innocent’, kid. This asshole was asking for it- what kind of father would I be if I left him alive after everything he did to you? The guy was a sicko!”

Nica couldn’t really argue with that, wisely staying silent.

He continued. “I came to get you out- ya know, since it’s my fault you’re here and all.” Chucky surprised her, cutting through the straight jacket with ease. “You don’t hafta come with me, but if you don’t have anywhere else to go- if you want family again- your Old Man would be happy to make up for lost time.”

The doll awkwardly turned around with jerky movements, rendering her speechless as he left her alone in the office, giving her a choice.

The silence was suddenly oppressive, the sick, sinking realization that he was right churned in her gut; She had no family left. Her Mom, her sister, her brother-in-law were all gone. A few tears escaped as she added Alice…her poor, sweet baby, to her list of losses.

She was considered a criminal, a murderer. Her only option besides going with the murderous Good Guy Doll was to willingly stay here, drugged and restrained against her will, taken advantage of and abused, surrounded by people that thought she was crazy.

Examining her “choices”, she found she didn’t really have one.

At least if she went with him, she could possibly learn the truth, grim though it may be, about where she came from, who she was- if she belonged anywhere. He may not hurt anyone else if she was there with him, if she wasn’t in trouble or danger.

Still not believing what she was about to do, Nica took one last look at the bodies in front of her, offering a silent apology as she made her choice and wheeled her chair out of the office and after the killer doll…and into an uncertain, unknown future.

*****

And there it is! What do you think? Let me know if you’d be interested in me continuing this little AU! Thanks to @series-thoughts for the inspo!! 😍🥰

#chucky series #chucky syfy #chucky 2021 #chucky season three #nica pierce #fiona dourif #andy barclay #brad dourif #jennifer tilly #jake wheeler #tiffany valentine #barclaypierce #andy x nica #lexy cross #devon evans #jevon #chucky season 3 #child's play #chucky

[buckysgrace]

Thirty One

“Kim,” Her mother’s voice and the sound of her pushing her door open drew Kim and Billy apart. He took the towel from her, pretending to hold it up against his nose as he winced from the contact. They sat far apart from each other, even though they hadn’t been doing anything wrong, “Oh, Billy. Let me see your nose.” Susan frowned as her gaze landed between the two of them, fixating on his bleeding nose. Billy looked at her awkwardly, like he wasn’t quite sure what to do.

“It’s alright,” He responded, pulling away from her like he was a scared animal and she was his prey. Her fingers lingered in the air for a second before she tried again, “Really, I’ve had worse.” He tried to convince her but she stood her ground as she approached him again, tilting his head back so she could look at his nose. Kim thought it was odd that she seemed to actually be concerned that Billy was hurt.

“Y’know, I used to work at the hospital. Like actually on the floor and doing the important stuff,” Her mom mumbled as she cupped his face in her hands and inspected his nose. Billy looked like he was close to pushing her away as he glanced towards Kim, his eyes alarmed like he was being pulled into a trap. She knew his dislike of being touched and couldn’t imagine how it felt at the moment with someone who ignored him most of the time, “It’s not broken, you’re lucky. Just keep the pressure there and -”

“I know what to do,” Billy had had enough as he pulled away from her, his eyes cutting into the older woman, “It’s not the first time it’s happened. I know how to handle it myself.” His voice was harsh and Susan got the point as she took a step back away from him. Kim watched, wondering why her mom cared so much now. 

“He should be lucky?” Kim found herself saying, looking at her mom in disbelief, “Neil just punched him in the face.” Kim was astounded that her mom would even suggest that he got off easily. Susan sighed deeply, looking as if she was about to argue when Billy answered.

“Don’t talk about him. He’s my dad, you don’t know him. Just drop it.” Kim turned to him stunned, feeling her cheeks redden and her anger fade. She felt like she had a reason to be upset but she quieted herself. She thought of all the times she had defended her father during his mess ups. She was sure Billy thought that Neil was all he had. There was still blood running from his nose but not as much as previous. She turned back to her mom.

“Things got out of hand. I know, I know,” Susan looked at Kim quickly before she could speak over her, “He’s sorry though. I just talked to him. Let’s just- start over. Everything that just happened was in the past. Billy, why don’t you go get cleaned up and Kim you can put your pretty flowers in a vase. Okay? Everyone just needs to breathe, everything is fine.” Susan forced a smile as she looked between the two teenagers. Kim could sense her resolve breaking and felt a pang of guilt towards her mother. She had fallen into bad relationship after bad relationship. She couldn’t afford to care for the two girls on her own anymore and now here she was, stuck in some strange town with a man who beat his son. She was trying to hold the image of them being perfect together but it was diminishing more and more. Kim wondered how her mother got to this point. What she was like when she was Kim’s age, what her dreams were. It made her sad to think that she could end up in the very same position one day.

“Sure,” Billy exhaled like he wasn’t bothered by it. Kim was sure that he wasn’t. He was so used to being treated a certain way, how could he understand that this wasn’t fair? She didn’t want to go and sit near Neil knowing that he would never apologize. She was too bitter for that. Anytime her father ever raised his voice at them he always apologized. He never made them feel less then, “I’ll be back.” He stood without looking at Kim but she couldn’t help her wandering eyes as he left. She looked back, surprised to see her moms stern face.

“What the hell was that?” Her voice was a lot angrier than she had ever heard it before. Susan had always been the one to have to get onto them, as their father refused, but she had never sounded so brash before. Kim blinked at her.

“What?” Kim asked honestly, not understanding why her mother was getting so angry with her. She didn’t know what she had done wrong.

“Why was he in here?” Susan looked over her shoulder to make sure the door was shut as she stared down at the younger redhead. Kim felt her eyebrows furrowing and a pit of worry growing inside of her stomach and spreading into her chest. 

“He needed help with his nosebleed,” Kim started to explain as she held up the pink first aid kit. Susan rolled her eyes and pinched her temple as she sighed frustrated. Kim frowned, shaking the box as she spoke up again, “I was thanking him too. He took the blame for something he didn’t even do. He got punched because of me, the least I could do was help.” She didn’t think she was in the wrong but her mom was treating her in that way.

“He’s trouble. You don’t understand half of what he’s done. Just please,” Her mom took Kim’s hands in hers and squeezed, “Don’t fall under his bad influence. I don’t want to see you going down the wrong path.” Kim was stunned as she stared up into mirroring hazel eyes.

“What are you talking about?” She assumed she was speaking of California but she never had the privilege of finding out the gritty details. She assumed moving this far away was just Neil’s way of isolating them, “You act like I’ve done something wrong. I was just helping him.” She stared up at her mother, remembering how often she would tell them all to stick together. She was confusing her so much.

“It’s not my place to say. I know you wouldn’t do anything bad with him, you’re so much smarter than that. I just don’t want you to get mixed up with him or his crowd. Especially if his friend is interested in you. I wouldn’t have brought you out there had I known.” Her mother was trying to explain everything at once and it was just leaving Kim even more conflicted. She didn’t understand how Billy still came out to be the bad guy after everything that had just happened. She felt like screaming that she was dumb enough to fall into Billy’s snare. She had done so much with him that she was sure she would give her mother nightmares. She inhaled deeply, holding the air in her lungs as she tried to sort her thoughts.

“I’ll be out for dinner in a minute.” She said finally as she pulled her hands away from her mother’s. Susan gave her a pitiful look and Kim really did feel guilty about how unfair her situation was. It wasn’t an excuse, however, her mom should’ve never married Neil. As soon as she knew who he was she should’ve been running in the opposite direction. Susan turned softly, giving her one last sad look over her shoulder before she was leaving her room. Kim felt herself collapse on her pillows, pulling the stuffed cow to her chest as she held it tightly and thought of Billy. She wondered how long he had begged for another adult to come into his life and pull him away from Neil. Everyone had failed him.

She lingered in the mirror as she tried to compose herself. She messed with her hair softly, before she wiped at her cheeks. She didn’t want Neil to have the satisfaction that he had upset her. She thought of Billy suddenly, thinking of how defensive he had grown over his father. She didn’t understand it. She walked out of her room quietly, heading back towards the kitchen. 

Billy was setting the table. He had changed his shirt into a blue button up and even though his nose was red and swollen, he was acting like everything was fine. He glanced up at her, but quickly looked away as he continued to make the table. Kim wished he would look at her for a little bit longer.

“There you are,” Susan smiled and placed a gentle kiss on her daughter’s cheek. Kim looked at her unsure, “Can you just pass out some water? I think water will be better than soda tonight.” Kim nodded and began to pull out cups to fill with ice and water. It felt weird, trying to pretend like everything was normal.

It was quiet as they prepared for dinner. She was actually surprised that the food actually smelled nice. She couldn’t tell if it was her doing or if her mom had followed the directions that closely. She began to put the cups down on the table, glancing up as Billy worked. He was trying hard not to look at her and she was wondering if she had overstepped his boundaries. 

“It looks good.” Neil’s gruff voice sent shivers up her back. She paused her movements, meeting his sharp eyes as she looked up. He was staring at her intensely, like he was waiting for her to do the wrong thing. She gulped hard as she looked back at the table and wished he would stop staring at her.

“Susan did really well this time,” It was weird having Billy be the one to keep the peace, “I mean she always does well. It just looks really good this time.” He added quickly. Kim watched as his eyes kept darting away from his father. It seemed like Neil was the only one he struggled to keep eye contact with. 

“She did,” Neil’s eyes kept lingering on Kim, even as she walked away and went to help her mom bring the salad and pasta over. She could feel her hands trembling, unsure of what she did wrong  as he continued to stare harshly at her, “It’s a shame Kim was too busy to help her.” Kim gulped hard when she was brought back into the conversation. She wasn’t sure what she should say or do. She looked to her mom for help.

“Oh, she helps enough,” Susan’s smile was stiff as she placed the hot pan of pasta down, “Okay, let’s get settled in.” She was doing her best to keep any meltdowns from happening as everyone slowly sat down. Kim was surprised that Billy sat next to her, expecting him to give her the cold shoulder. Maybe he was worried about Neil finding out.

“It’s really good, mom.” Max was the first one to speak after everyone quietly made their plates. Kim held onto her fork and stared at the small serving in front of her. She felt like she had a rock sitting in her stomach that was preventing her from taking a bite. She fiddled with her food, too worried that she would throw it up if she ate. She looked up, suddenly aware of the hot eyes on the side of her face.

Neil was glaring at her, his jaw clenched tightly as he watched her. She felt her hand trembling as she slowly placed a small bite in her mouth and chewed it slowly. It tasted like nothing to her. She wasn’t sure why the idea of her having a guy interested in her bothered him so much. He knew she would be eighteen soon. It wasn’t like he actually ever meant any of his complaints towards Billy and all of the girls he brought home. 

It was like someone had hit a light switch. One second Neil was fine and the next he was on his feet in a storm of rage as he gripped the table and flipped it completely over. Billy’s arm crossed in front of her waist, pushing her back far enough so the leg of the table didn’t smack her in the face. She was still stunned, turning to the older man as he began to scream in such a rage that his face was turning red. Remnants of glass and food scattered at their feet as Billy moved his hand away from her and she could feel him sensing the blow that was to come. 

The slap that Neil delivered echoed hard and loud in the room and bounced off of the bare walls. There was stunned silence for a moment as Susan turned her head, holding her red cheek in her hand as she looked up at her husband with tears in her eyes. All hell broke loose after that. Max must’ve been to her breaking point because she was up to her feet in a flash, her small fists banging into Neil’s chest. Kim didn’t even think as she took a hold of the small girl, pulling her back so quickly that they both fell onto the mess of ceramic and food. Kim winced at the stabbing feeling in her hand but ignored it as the smaller girl wiggled in her arms, screaming profanities at the older man.

“Calm down,” Billy reasoned to his father as he held Neil’s fist in his hand and his forearm pressed against his fathers chest to keep him from charging forward, “You don’t want this. “ He urged, trying to calm the older man. His tone was firm and stern. Kim could feel the panic growing inside of her as she rocked the younger girl and planned on the best way to whisk her away if Neil barreled past Bily. 

Kim could feel the ice in her veins as she watched Neil’s angry form turn to Billy. She thought about how he had threatened him earlier if Billy were to touch him again. He took both of his strong hands and wrapped them around his son's shoulders before shoving him back. There were no words and he didn’t look back as he stormed away, knocking over items and colliding his fists with whatever objects lay in his wake.

Max sniffled in Kim’s arms, shuffling her way out slowly as she crawled towards Susan, “Mom,” Her voice was broken and shaky as she spoke, “Mommy are you okay?” Susan nodded, taking in a shaky breath as the tears tumbled down her cheeks. Kim was forced to sit and watch, unable to move as she stared at the large red mark on her cheek. She wondered if this was the first time or if it had been happening before. Billy crouched down in front of Kim, looking at her unsure as he took her hand in his gently. She glanced at him, sensing a calmness flooding over him as he turned her palm up as the blood dripped through her fingers and onto the floor. She stared at the piece of blue ceramic that poked out of her skin.

“Are you okay?” He spoke in a hushed manner, his fingers wrapping around the piece as he gently nudged it out. She winced, looking at the large gash on her palm. She nodded quickly, trying to process what had just happened.

“I’m okay,” She tried to reassure him. He stood again, heading to the kitchen as he dampened a paper towel. Kim looked towards her mom who had Max wrapped up in her arms, pulling her close to her chest. She swallowed a lump in her chest, “Mom, are you okay?” She finally found the courage to speak to her. Susan turned her sad eyes towards her oldest daughter, her good cheek resting on top of Max’s fiery red hair. 

“I’m sorry,” Her mom breathed out through tears. They all winced at the same time, hearing loud wrecking noises coming from the master bedroom. There had been bad fights before, Kim could remember. Neil would punch walls and throw around objects. He would take his anger out on Billy, but she had never seen him ever hit or show any amount of hatred towards her mother before, “Oh my, it’s such a mess.” Kim wasn’t sure if she was talking about the literal mess or the scramble that was their family at the moment. 

Billy came back to her, gently dabbing the blood up around the gash on her palm. Kim looked away from it, trying not to feel sick as the stinging shot up her arm. She was still bleeding a lot and didn’t want to focus on that. Her mom left Max, bending on the floor as she began to swoop up the mess of ceramic and food.

“Susan,” Billy’s voice was so gentle and soft that it made the older woman freeze, “I’ll get it. Max, can you get some ice for her face? It’ll help keep any bruising or any swelling down.” Susan’s mouth opened and then closed again as she stared at the boy. Billy completely ignored looking at her, instead he focused on cleaning Kim’s hand. Max crossed the mess gently and Kim could see her cheeks were red from crying.

“It’s okay,” Kim watched him, thinking about how only an hour ago she was dabbing the blood from his nose, “That’s a lot of blood.” She said suddenly, feeling a bit sick as she stared at her hand. Billy looked up at her, his blue eyes locking in on her panicked expression. There was a reason she never considered working in the medical field. 

“It’s going to be fine, you won’t need any stitches,” Billy smiled up at her, relaxing her nerves as Max crossed back through the kitchen and handed her mother a baggy full of ice, “It should stop bleeding soon.” He mumbled as he turned her hand over, inspecting the other side as he held the towel towards her gash. She felt a million different thoughts racing in her brain as she was fairly convinced it was too late and she would be losing her hand entirely. Billy seemed to notice as he ran his fingernails over her skin softly to relax her. She wondered if he wanted to hold her hand as badly as she wanted to hold his. 

“I think we should go to a motel tonight,” Susan spoke up. Kim turned to face her mother, watching as she held the ice against her cheek and rocked Max at the same time. She was surprised she was suggesting to get away from Neil at all. She wondered if this was finally the turning point for her mom, “Just until he cools down.” Max was sniffling against her chest and Kim nodded, not sure what else she could say to the conversation. 

Billy didn’t look up as he spoke, “I can get your clothes from Neil’s room,” He continued to clean Kim’s hand gently and she was sure she had never felt him touch her so soft before, “I’ll give him a few minutes to cool down.” Billy placed a bandaid over her hand before beginning to wrap it in gauge. She wondered if he had ever considered being a doctor with the way he handled blood so easily. She was sure, like earlier, this was nothing new to him.

“Thank you,” Her moms voice was ragged as she spoke up again, watching the two teens intensely. Kim was too occupied with Billy’s hand movements to notice, “Girls, you should go pack a bag. Just for the night, we’ll come back in the morning.”

“Come with me,” Max pleaded as she held onto her mom’s shirt. Kim felt a pang of guilt as she watched the two interact. She didn’t think it was fair for Max to have experienced so much and to be so young, “Please.” Susan turned to Kim, watching her with a peculiar look for a moment before she nodded and went with Max. 

“Will I lose my hand, doctor?” Kim felt herself trying to lighten the mood as Billy finished wrapping her hand. It was secured nicely but it still throbbed and she did partially wonder if she was still going to die from an infection. He snorted, then glanced over his shoulder before helping her stand.

“Are you okay?” He asked, looking at her worried. She nodded her head quickly, trying not to linger in his concerned eyes. She didn’t want him to worry about her. He seemed to accept her nod as an answer, “Go get your back real quick while I pack one for your mom.” Kim hesitated as she watched him.

“What if he hurts you?” She sounded like a scared child as she watched him. She knew Neil was able to do far worse than a bloody nose. Billy looked away from her.

“He won’t, not this time. Just please, go pack your bag.” He didn’t let her argue anymore as he stepped away from her. She felt a stinging in her heart that she tried to ignore as she walked towards her room. She didn’t know what she would do if Billy got hurt again. She didn’t want to see him all bruised and bloody anymore.

She grabbed a duffel bag from her closet and tossed her pajamas inside and an extra pair of clothes. She threw in a bottle of lotion, her makeup remover and some deodorant. She raced back to the bathroom and grabbed her toothbrush and toothpaste then grabbed a box of pads to be safe. She lingered by the bathroom door, hoping to see Billy but he hadn’t come out from Neil’s room yet. It was too quiet. 

She tried not to think about it as she finished packing her bag. Her fingers lingered for a minute when she looked at the stuffed cow laying neatly on her pillows. She bit her lip hard before shoving it deep in her bag. Just in case.

“Are you almost ready?” Her mom peeked inside her room just as Kim finished zipping the bag up. She nodded, placing it over her shoulder and wincing as she gripped the strap too hard. She followed the other girls towards the door and waited for Billy to appear again. He must’ve given her mom her bag when she was busy.

“Can we go?” Max sounded a bit scared as her eyes lingered on the master bedroom door. Kim shifted on her feet, feeling a bit better when Billy appeared from his room unscathed. She searched his face, making sure there were no marks or bruises that she missed. Susan nodded.

“Let’s go,” She guided Max towards the door, opening it and letting the younger girl go first, “Kim, come on.” Her mother urged as she glanced away from her. Kim nodded, looking at Billy’s empty hands. 

“Where’s your bag?” Kim asked as her mother and Max headed out the door. Billy shuffled on his feet, his hands dried with blood as he peered up at her with electric eyes. He waited until the other two girls were out of earshot before he spoke up. 

“I don’t think I was invited.” He said slowly, pretending to check the bandage on her hand. She looked at him surprised. Regardless if her mom had meant for him to come or not, he was coming.

“You were, this is me inviting you right now. Go get your bag,” She told him, more forceful than she had ever spoken towards him before. He exhaled softly as he looked at her, she could feel the burning rising in her chest, “Billy, go get your bag.” She told him harshly, feeling her voice burning from the tears that were forming. He took another step forward.

“He’s my dad. I can’t just leave him like you guys can.” He was speaking softly, like he was trying to reason with her. She stared up at him, horrified by what he was saying.

“Yes you can, he punched you. You can come with us. With me,” She searched his expression for any change of his features, any hint that he had reconsidered, “Please.” She felt as if her throat was on fire from how badly she wanted to cry. It wasn’t fair that he felt like he had to stay here with Neil and pick up the mess his father had made. It wasn’t fair that his mom had made him feel unwelcome. Nothing about this was fair.

He cupped her face gently, wiping away the tears that had betrayed her as his thumbs massaged her soft skin. She stared up at him hopeful, wishing he knew just how much he meant to her. She was terrified to leave him alone, terrified that something else would happen to him.

He didn’t say anything as he bent forward and caressed his lips with hers, barely touching her at all. Her cheeks were wet as she pushed up against him, her arms snaking around his shoulders as she pushed her lips on his and held onto him tightly. She inhaled him like he was the only air she would need as she pushed all of her thoughts and feelings into her kiss. For once, she didn’t care if anyone was to see them. She didn’t want to leave him behind. She wanted to stay with him. She was desperate as she pulled him towards her as he melted against her lips, holding her gently like she might break.

He pulled away, his forehead resting against hers as he stared down at her plump lips, “You need to go.” He mumbled softly, his hands pushing through her red hair. She thought about crying even more, wondering if that would convince him to go with her.

“Not without you,” She pleaded, staring up at him. He traced his thumb over her skin gently, wiping away her tears with his rough hands. She was determined that they stick together, “I’ll stay with you.” She added hastily. He sighed and shook his head.

“I need to be with my dad in the same way you need to be with your mom and sister right now. You know the number, you can call and I swear I’ll answer. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?” She felt defeated as her breath became shaky and her lips curled into a frown as the bubble of tears rushed inside of her chest, “Please don’t cry. I’ll be fine. I’ll see you first thing in the morning, okay?” He looked desperate to make her see his side but she just couldn’t understand his reasoning. After all Neil had done and Billy was still willing to stay and make things right with his dad. She nodded sadly, placing her hands on top of his as he held her face gently.

“Promise me you’ll be okay?” She asked him, not caring about what her mother thought about the moment. Susan could think that he was a bad influence as much as she wanted, only Kim knew the truth. She’d defend him for as long as he needed someone to defend him. He hesitated as he watched her before he slowly nodded.

“I’m a lot tougher than I look,” He tried to crack a smile but was unable to. She wondered if he was just as scared as she was, “Go, before your mom comes looking for you. Please.” She nodded stiffly, too afraid to answer in case she cried again. Her hand was throbbing from how tightly she was holding onto him. She didn’t want to lose him but she knew there was no point in fighting. He had already made up his mind and was forcing her to accept it. 

She pushed against him again, placing a long soft kiss against his lips as she felt her words failing her. She didn’t know why she was acting like it was the end of the world. A few months ago she would’ve felt bad, but she would’ve moved on. She wasn’t sure why she was letting this bother her so much. He pulled away first again, a small smile painted on his lips and she knew her time had run out. She nodded, picking up her duffel bag again as she looked back at him.

“I’ll see you in the  morning.” She whispered out hoarsely. He nodded, sticking his hands in his pockets as he watched her. She wondered what he thought of her right now. If he thought she was attached before she was certain he was thinking that now. She turned quickly and headed out the back door before her mom came up to fetch her. She made haste down the steps, her hand stinging as she held onto the strap of her duffel bag over her shoulder. She stepped forward, looking at how Susan was pleading with a crying Max. Kim opened the door and was surrounded by her sobs.

“We can’t leave him. We can’t!” Max bawled like she was a small toddler again. Kim quickly turned to face her, understanding why she was so upset.

“He said he can’t go anyways,” She tried to reassure her younger sister as she faced her. Max’s eyes were so red and puffy she was surprised they weren’t drying out from the cold air blowing on her face. Susan sighed from the front seat and Kim ignored her, “He said he has to stay. I tried to get him to come, okay?” Max collapsed on her lap in a mess of tears and snot as Kim gently caressed her red hair back. Susan began to drive away from their house. Kim never thought she would miss it as she did right now. She wanted to cry like Max was but she feared what her mother would say.

“Everything is going to be okay,” Susan spoke up after a few minutes of driving in tense silence, the only sound filling the car was Max’s ragged sobs, “We’ve been through worse. We have each other and that’s all that matters.” Kim wanted to add that Billy had been through a lot worse as well she had left him behind. She didn’t care what he had done in California to make her mother so fearful of him. He was still a kid, he still needed someone to look after her. 

Kim didn’t say anything as she looked out the window and played with Max’s tangly hair. They had been in a lot worse before, like when they had lost the house and Susan’s drinking problem took a turn for the worse. That was right before she had met Neil, they spent nights alternating between sleeping on the couches of her coworkers and in her car. Neil was supposed to change everything. Perhaps, he had. Kim was unsure if it was for the better, however. 

She wondered what worse things Billy had faced, other than his dads beatings. Neil was well off, there was no denying that. She only wondered if he was similar to her. That he would prefer living in unknown places rather than be forced to be near his dad. 

She thought of how they would play this off to the neighbors. Everyone liked to snoop in a small town like this. She was sure someone had seen them leaving or heard something. Her mother had always been good about dismissing drama. She could easily brush the situation under the rug, Kim was sure of it. She wanted so desperately for her mother to stay away from Neil, but at the same time she didn’t want her to. Kim was well aware that Neil would take all of his anger out on Billy. She didn’t want that to happen, she didn’t want to be separated from him.

“Okay,” Kim looked up as her mom pulled into a motel. It didn’t look as nice as the one Billy had taken her to but she figured it would be more expensive for her mom anyways. Max sat up slowly, rubbing her eyes. Kim felt so bad for her younger sister. She wished she didn’t have to experience any of this. She deserved to have an easy life, “It’ll work, won’t it?” Kim stared at the red mark on her moms face as she turned to look at them. Both of her daughters nodded stiffly. It was better than dealing with Neil all night longer.

Kim’s thoughts turned sad again as she thought about Billy and how he was stuck at the house with his dad. She thought about calling him as soon as they got inside but was worried her mom might mention something. She was afraid of creating a bigger mess as their family seemed to be falling apart around them.

“I’ll go get us a room, really quick.” Susan locked the car doors behind them as they made their way inside. Kim felt herself wincing as her hand continued to sting. She didn’t think to pack any medicine with her, she was hoping she’d be able to sleep the throbbing pain away. She glanced around the empty motel room, glancing over to watch her mom talk to the lady at the front desk. She was sure they all looked a mess. Her mother seemed to be thinking the same thing as she kept messing with her hair.

“Do you think he’ll be okay?” Max asked suddenly. Kim gulped all of her fears down as she stared at the younger girl. Max had such a hopeful look in her eyes that Kim couldn’t find it in herself to break. She knew that Billy wouldn’t want her to do that either. He was more than adamant that he would be fine.

“Yes,” She breathed her lie out hard, “He’ll take care of himself. We’ll see him again in the morning.” Kim fought everything in her to give her little sister a smile. She wished she was able to convince herself of the same lie. Max nodded slowly, seemingly believing her.

“Is your hand okay?” Kim looked down at where it was bandaged and nodded. It hurt a lot but she wasn’t going to say anything. Not even to her mother. She didn’t want any of them to be worrying about her at the moment when there was so much else going on.

“Yeah, maybe I’ll have a cool scar afterwards.” Kim grinned, trying to get the younger girl to smile but failing. Max looked like she was deep in thought as she glanced towards their mother who was busy counting out the cash for how much it would cost to stay the night.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have gotten so mad.” Max’s voice was timid and full of sorrow. Kim frowned, not liking how she was blaming herself. She couldn’t control what Neil did.

“Don’t be sorry. You were brave, there’s no shame in that. He shouldn’t have done any of that. He shouldn’t be hitting anyone.” Kim told her, almost sternly as Max looked up at her again. Their conversation went quiet as their mother finally joined them.

“Ready?” Susan looked stressed as she began to walk forward, reaching a hand out to hold onto Max’s small hand. Kim followed shortly behind, watching the wallpaper disappear into different colors until they finally reached their room. Her body felt so tired and exhausted but her mind was awake and alert. Susan unlocked the door, pushing it open.

“Well, it’ll be like a big girl slumber party,” Her mother tried to make light of the situation as they stumbled into the room. It was in worse condition than the one Billy had taken her to. The blue walls had almost faded to white and it smelt similar to the way her grandmother's house did when she would watch them when they were young. The lamp in the corner of the room kept flickering as it exposed the one King sized bed. Kim knew it would be plenty for the three of them. She tried not to think about how it would’ve fit four of them perfectly, “I’m going to wash up.” Her mom set her bag on the end of the bed before quickly walking towards the bathroom. Max looked to her older sister with a heartbroken expression.

“Are you okay?” Kim finally asked her, sitting on the edge of the bed so she could be at her sister’s height. Max’s face immediately fell into a frown and tears began to cascade down her cheeks as she cried again. Kim took Max’s hands away from her face and held them tightly, squeezing to support her younger sister, “Mom’s right. Everything is going to be fine.”

“I miss daddy.” Kim felt her heart breaking for the small girl in front of her. She took a deep breath to fight back her own tears as she nodded. Kim felt similar to how her younger sister did at the moment. What she wouldn’t do to curl up in one of her dads suffocating hugs. He hadn’t called since she had sent the money, she didn’t even know if he had got it. She wondered if he cared about them at all or if he was too lost in his own addiction to care at the moment. 

“I do too,” Kim licked her bottom lip, trying to focus on anything but the tears swelling inside of her chest again. This had been a rotten night, “But we still have each other. That’s what matters. You’re my baby sister, I’ll always take care of you.” Kim promised as she squeezed Max’s hands softly. It had been a long time since she had seen her this vulnerable.

“I wanted to run away,” Max spoke up, looking at Kim with tear stained eyes, “When we first moved here. I wanted to run away and be with him so badly. Part of me still does.” Kim blinked away her own tears as she nodded in understanding. She couldn’t blame her for wanting to leave, she had wanted the same for a long time now. 

“Maybe this will be the change we need. You have so many friends here now, we can get mom the support,” Kim tried to persuade the younger girl. She had no idea if that was what would actually happen. She could hope, but her mom was hard to read at times, “You know I’m always here if you want to talk.”

“I hate talking about my feelings,” Max grumbled, reminding Kim of Billy, “We shouldn’t have left without him.” Kim nodded hesitantly. She agreed, but she didn’t know how much of that statement her mom would agree with.. The bathroom door opened again and Susan stepped out changed, both of her cheeks reddened and tear stained. No matter how mad or upset Kim was at her for leaving, there was not a comparable feeling to seeing your mother cry. It left a hole inside of her heart. 

“I know, but he wouldn’t come with us,” Kim tried to explain to the younger girl, “I tried so hard but he wouldn’t listen. He said he needed to be there for Neil.” Kim tried not to make a face and acted as if she understood the other boy. Max’s eyebrows furrowed together.

“Steve said you wouldn’t call Billy your brother,” Max accused her, her blue eyes shooting into her, “Why? Did you actually tell him to come with us?” Kim gaped at her for a moment, unsure of how to approach the subject. 

“That’s not what I meant by it and yes I did try to make him come with us,” Kim pleaded the younger girl to listen as she squeezed her hands again. Kim tried to ignore the throbbing pain in her palm every time she flexed her hand, “He’s more like a friend to me than anything. We just don’t relate as siblings. Does that make sense?” Kim did her best to explain herself without giving anything away. She didn’t want to traumatize the younger girl. Max nodded slowly, looking like she accepted the answer as she reached forward and tumbled into her older sister’s arms. Kim hugged her back, knowing how hard Max tried to put on a tough exterior. 

“You girls should get ready for bed, I think we all need a long rest.” Susan nodded, looking at where their hands were interlocked. Max pulled away first, grabbing her pajamas from her bag as she lingered near their mother. Kim did the same, wondering if she should say anything to her mom. She didn’t think she deserved to get hit and only hoped this would keep her far away from Neil. They could survive on their own, like she said, they had faced worse. Kim’s only concern was Billy.

Max was still standing close to Susan as Kim made her way to the bathroom. She thought after everything that had happened that she would be sick. She looked in the mirror, noticing her red cheeks and puffy eyes. Apparently none of them were very good at keeping themselves together. She undressed into her nightgown but her fingertips lingered on the bruises Billy had left on her. She wasn’t sure why she was so afraid that she wouldn’t see him again. It was as if this was a dream and when she woke up he would be gone forever. Just a fragment of her memory. 

She scrubbed at her teeth, willing herself for some sort of normalcy as she tried not to think about Billy too hard. She didn’t know what she would do with herself if he was gone forever. Even now, she could feel the line that connected them. It was like he was here with her, even though he wasn’t. 

Max had already changed when she came back into the room, the lights were dim as she made her way to the side of the bed by the window. Max’s small body was curled up to her mother’s, like she was afraid to let her go. Kim understood. It was hard to look at her mom after everything that happened. For some reason, she felt as if she was partially responsible. She knew that it was irrational. She couldn’t control that Tommy had come to see her. Not that it was even Tommy’s fault, it was Neil’s anger issues that landed them in this position.

Kim clambered in next to Max as she pulled the scratchy sheets up over her body. She felt so alone at the moment, even with her mom and sister laying next to her. She thought that something was missing. She blamed it on her anxiety. She was convinced she was overthinking the situation with Billy. He had lived on his own with Neil for sixteen years. She was sure he’d be able to handle one night alone with him.

“Kimberly,” Her mom spoke up softly and she turned, seeing the younger redhead was fast asleep with her head on Susan’s chest. She looked at her mother, concerned at how red her face still was, “I need to ask you something.” She felt her eyebrows furrowing as she looked at her confused. She wasn’t sure what sort of answers she could help her mom with. She had always been treated like a little adult with her mother. She would have Kim pick up the slack that her father failed to do and would ask her advice on the guys she was seeing. Kim was certain she knew all of her mother’s secrets. 

“What is it?” Kim looked at her confused, sitting up a bit to look at the older woman better. The same hazel eyes stared back at her and Kim suspected she would begin to ask her what she thought about moving again. She figured this would be it, she was finally going to leave Neil. She started to worry about Billy again, knowing he wouldn’t come with them. 

“Is there something going on with you and Billy?” Kim felt her whole world stop. She felt similar to how she did earlier as fear raced through her and dug its nails into her skin. Her veins turned into an icy river as she exhaled, willing her heart to start again as her mother stared at her expectantly, “And please don’t lie to me. I won’t judge, I just want to know the truth.”

The truth? The truth was it was so much more complicated than anything that she could tell her mother. To Kim, it didn’t matter how much her mom told her she wouldn’t judge her. Despite everything that had just happened, she didn’t trust her. She had witnessed how hard it could be to stand up to your abuser, much less leave them. She didn’t want to say anything and then have her mom turn around and tell Neil, just for the blame and anger to fall back to Billy. She hated how cruel her thoughts were but she knew there was truth to it. She wouldn’t let Billy take the fall for this. Not this time. 

“No, God no,” Kim put on a good act as she tried to look as disgusted as she could, “He’s- you and Neil are married. It’s not like that. I just don’t have many friends and he listens surprisingly well.” She kept her hands glued to the bed, unmoving as she wouldn’t give herself away by fidgeting. She watched her mother relax a bit, nodding as she accepted the answer. Kim was thankful. She wasn’t sure what she would do if her mom still suspected something between the two of them. She knew then, that if this was to continue, that they had to be more careful. No more sex in places where people could easily walk in. Her mother was watching them and would continue to do so. She was sure of it. 

“I’m sorry, I just saw the way he was cleaning you up earlier and I guess I let my fears get the best of me,” Her mom sighed, “Love is hopeless. Trust me, you think you find someone good and this happens.” Susan motioned towards her reddened cheek. Kim faltered for a moment, as her mothers words were not something that she wanted to hear and accept. She didn’t want to live the rest of her life alone, she wanted to fall in love and have someone love her in the same way. 

“Right, it’s hopeless.” Kim repeated. She had always dreamed of having her knight in shining armor whisk her away. She guessed it was just hopeful thinking as she laid near her mom and thought of all the bad men she had been with before. Kim wondered if she had her same rotten luck. She didn’t want to end up in a similar situation. She wanted to be happy. She wanted to love someone and have someone love her in the same way. 

“What I said earlier,” Susan spoke again, appearing more exhausted as she looked towards the young girl, “Stay away from, Billy. I know what you said, but I still don’t trust him. He’d only use you for one thing.” Kim stared at her, wondering if she knew more than what she did. If her mother did, she didn’t say anything else as she closed her eyes while resting against Max’s head. Kim bit her lip so hard she thought she would draw blood. She didn’t think it was fair to say Billy wouldn’t stick around when he was the one who volunteered to stay with his abusive father. 

Kim waited until her mother fell asleep before she reached the inside of her duffel bag. She had so desperately wanted to call and hear Billy’s voice but now she was afraid to do so. She didn’t think she’d be able to sleep without knowing that he was alright. She pulled out the stuffed cow she had buried deep inside of it. She laid back against the pillows, clutching it towards her chest as she tried to convince herself that he was okay. She didn’t want to call in case Neil answered, but she wanted to make sure he was okay. If she closed her eyes hard enough she could still smell him, could still feel him lingering against her skin. She faced the window, clutching the cow in her chest and willed this to be some sick dream.

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove x oc #billy hargrove stepcest #tw stepcest #tw pseudocest #billy hargrove x original character #Cruel Summer

[xo-lesserafim]

FALLING FOR YOUR SMILE AND EYES

EPISODE 6. BYOB

author’s note: Please enjoy episode 6. Thank you guys so much for 13 followers. I appreciate every single one of you guys<3 Also this is where Falling for your Smile and Eyes doesnt follow the timeline in xo kitty. It also have some of the same stuff as “THE EVENTFUL NIGHT!”

Bold: Korean

Italics: Over the phone.

Both: Korean and over the phone.

Back to masterlist

“Gosh, Min ho. Cant you at least put a shirt on when I’m eating.” I say.

“Hey, it’s not my fault, you can’t handle this.” He says misting his face.

“You’re right, I cant handle.” I say.

“I’m right?”

As I put the mist thing down, i go to his ear and whisper “You’re to bloody hot.”

A few seconds, i jump into this lap, arms around his neck.

“Oh my gosh.” Min ho said.

I put my finger on my shut him up.

We were about to kiss, when..

“AHH.” Min ho screamed.

TIME SKIP

“Alex,Wait!” Kitty said.

I guess she told him about him being our half-brother.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

“I was worried that something bad might have happened since the text silence.”

“ No, yeah It’s all good. Just had a lot going on, you know?“ He said.

“Iguana’s run loose in the Italians’ room. and I’m afraid it’s gonna get turner into a belt if ai don’t find them soon.”

“Plus a lot of midterm prep. Hope you guys have been studying.”

“We have.” I said.

“But, we’re also been busy trying to figure out what my mom saw in Korean Snape.” Kitty said.

“Kitty, you really need to focus on studying.” He says.

“ And Professor Snape was good at the end.”

“Right.” Kitty said.

“But what if we go talk to him, right?”

“Get to know him, and figure him out.”

“Not, now” He said.

“Why? His house is literally right here. We can go together.” Kitty said.

“It’s the whole reason you came here to teach.”

“ I came here to learn about him, to get to know him, to see if I want a relationship with him. I love my dad. The dad who raised me. I don’t need to rush into this.” He said.

“ I get it.” Kitty said.

“But, I know some people that you’ll definitely wanna have a relationship with.”

“My sisters, Our sisters, I was thinking we could FaceTime them.”

“Margot might be frosty at first, but when she-.”

“Kitty, we just can’t upend everyone’s lives.” Professor Finnerty said.

“What if we’re wrong?”

“Well, what if we’re right?” Kitty said.

“Then we’ll be enhancing everyone’s lives.”

“Stop, I know you’re just trying to help, but not everyone’s on your timetable.” He said.

“I have test to organize, and you guys have tests to study for.”

TIME SKIP

“I just wanted to talk with him. and then he said that not everybody is on my timetable.” Kitty said venting.

“So now I’m wondering about professor lee and-.”

“How about instead of fixating on all this Alex drama, we concentrate on what you guys are wearing to Min ho’s madness party?” Q asked.

“I’m not going.” I said.

“I have no reason to go.”

“Same.” Kitty said.

“Why you guys? It’s the event of the year.” Q said.

“Because Dae and Yuri will probably be there.” Kitty said.

“And, I just wanna avoid Min ho.” I said.

“Ever since Chuseok happened. I think I’ve crush on him. No, it was when I met him to welcome party.”

“Andrea, ANDREA!” Q said.

“Huh? Was I zoning out?” I asked.

“Yea. anyway Yuri is will be there. She’s Djing”

“Dae never goes to these things, so you don’t have to worry.”

“I’m not worried. I don’t care to spend time with somebody how can’t even acknowledge a meaningful gesture.” Kitty said.

“Here we go.” Q and I said.

I always hated the fact that Kitty was always venting, but I never got to.

I just always hated how I was in the shadow of her.

I mean, she always had dad’s attention. And Margot, and Lara Jean’s.

I just, wished I was i the spotlight for once.

“He didn’t even say thank you for the necklace.” Kitty said.

“Not even an emoji.”

“The necklace was our mom’s. I gave it to Dae when his mom died.”

“Okay, while so I would love to sit here and talk about this again, I think I would rather shove a pair of scissors in my ears.” Q said.

“I mean this whole week, we’ve been hearing is, Dae, necklace, Yuri, Alex, necklace, Alex, Yuri, Dae, necklace. I said.

“You’re like a robot that’s malfunctioning, stuck on a loop.”

“And you came here to have new experiences and live your life.”’Q said.

“You know what Min ho’s Madness Party is?”

“A new experience.”

“Ugh, Gosh. I can’t believe I was just about to stay in on a Friday night, pouting about a boy.” Kitty said.

“Well, you can do that. I need to study.” I say.

“Come on Andrea, I’ll give you twenty bucks.” Q says showing me a 20 dollar bill.

“Deal.” I said as he gave me it.

TIME SKIP: THE PARTY.

MIN HO’s POV.

I saw this girl walk in with a black, off the shoulder, mesh dress.

I mean I to say she looked really good.

“Who are you?” I thought.

When Kitty and Q came up to talk to her and she turned around.

ANDREA?

“No!” I said.

“No, no, no. Oh, my eyes! It’s like looking directly into the sun.”

ANDREA’s POV

“Hey you look at Drea, looking good.” Q said.

“You look so good.” Kitty said.

“Thanks, I actually made it myself!” I said.

“You’re a clothes and maybe a fashion designer?” Q asked.

“Yea! It’s what I do when I’m not studying, or doing my other hobbies.” I said.

“But anyway. Let-the-party-that-already- started get started!” I say as I maintain eye contact with MIN HO?

Why was he looking me?

“I told you, everyone is gonna lose their mind.” Q said.

“Yea, but I think they were looking at Kitty.” I say.

“Yea,totally.” Kitty said.

“Whatever.”’I say.

“Dae’s here.” Kitty said.

As we got mocktails, which sadly had no alcohol. But luckily Florian’s French.

“To new experiences!” I say.

“Let’s do this!” I say.

“Oh, Ah-ri!” Eunice coming up to me.

“Ah-ri?” They said.

“Yea! It’s a nickname Min ho came up with when I was talking with him one time.”

“There’s is someone I want you to meet. Meet Geon.” Eunice said.

“Hi! I’m Ah-ri or. Andrea!”

“Hi, I’m Geon.” He said.

“Here, let’s go get something to drink.”

“All right.”

We started talking, laughing at some jokes made, but then it started to go back.

“You know, sometimes I can’t believe Kitty is your sister, I mean I think she had the bad genes from your parents.” He said.

“Excuse me?” I said.

“Why did you even say that? “Are you saying that I’m better because I’m prettier? So what? In my opinion it’s all about the inside, and the outside. Plus why would you say that to her twin sister?” I said leaving him.

I decided to walk around, dance here and there but then I saw it.

Min ho and Madison were making out.

I found Q and Florian.

“I’m so sorry I have homework I need to finish. I’ll be back when I done.” I say running out.

I’ve had enough Min ho and Kitty. I just can’t handle being or living with them.

“Hi! Is this Jenny Song?” I asked.

“Yes! Hi Andrea do you need something?”

“This is so random but, can I live with you?”

“What, i’m yea sure. What happened anyway.”

“It’s a lot to explain but I’ll send you my location.”

“Alright sounds good.”

“Thank you.”

As I packed up, I told the dorm receptionist thanks, and I left.

“Thank you for letting me live with you.” I say.

“No problem, so tell me what happened.”

I explained to her about Min ho and Kitty, how I like him and how I hate always living in her shadow

“ Anyway do you remember the offer you gave me?” I said.

“I would love to join your company”

As we made it to the house I was shocked.

“The third floor was for guest but it’s yours now. I also have a music room full of instruments, an ice skating rink, a dance room,-.”

And a lot more that I could comprehend. But most the things were on the third floor at least.”

“Thank you so much.” I say.

I checked my phone as I got a notification.

I am going to have a lot to explain next time I see Q.

PREV EPISODE MASTERLIST MIN HO’s POV

TAGLIST: @chaewon-slays @cherrriesss

Copyrights © 2023 xo-lesserafim. All rights reserved. I do not own XO, Kitty , Netflix does. do not copy, translate, or repost anything without my permission.

#min ho x reader #sang heon lee #minho x oc #minho x y/n #minho x you #netflix #x reader #xo kitty #to all the boys series #x yn #xo lesserafim #xo-lesserafim

[zootopiathingz]

I watched Zootopia like 6 months ago on a whim, and now the fixation is still hyper...ing.

Yeah

Anyways, Judy and Nick are the best and deserve everything (I genuinely couldn't remember anyone else's names the first time I saw it) aaaaand yeah it's sad that the Fandom is basically nonexistent.

Actually, it's still going strong(?) on AO3 (i've made a few one-shots (shameless self promotion I'm Not_Quite_A_Moron there)) but still, kinda sucks.

Anyways, random headcanon time:

Nick has two moms (he doesn't have specific names for both of them, he just yells "MOM!" anytime he needs help)

Judy actually really likes eating meat, Nick just has to convince her to try it

Nick became really closed off and touch starved after the Junior Ranger Scouts incident, so now, he's a chronic cuddler (especially with Judy (which she loves))

Judy's on the autistic spectrum (she often stims by tapping her foot, and she likes to display affection via playful punches to the arm)

Judy was born on the same day that Nick got muzzled, as if the universe itself felt bad and said "here, have a rabbit" (definitely didn't steal this one from Tumblr nope certainly not)

Nick doesn't really like Gazelle's music, he's more of a rock kind of guy, but he'll stomach any song for Judy’s sake

Judy's asexual (Take one look at the nudist club scene and tell me she isn't at least demi)

Bestie I’d just like to say AAAAAAAAAA

Sorry, but I just got SO excited when I saw someone submitting headcanons! It’s been way too long since I’ve been able to have a good ol’ Zootopia discussion. Oh and I’ll certainly check out your fics! My user is Pixarpnflover so be on the look out for some kudos!✨

Anyway, I love the idea of Nick being raised by two moms! There was supposed to be a plotline about his dad—John Wilde, I believe was his name—but got scrapped along with a lot of other content. So until it’s actually mentioned in canon I’m choosing to believe his mom in the flashback was in fact a raging lesbian lmao🤷‍♀️ also would that make him a double mama’s boy?🤔

Ooo an herbivore converting to a meat diet? How intriguing! I like to think now that she lives in the city that Judy would be open to trying new foods, which would include poultry and fish. I can see her favoring sushi or even turkey.

Nick being openly affectionate after meeting Judy, and reserving most of that said affection for her? Hell yeah. He’s very unapologetic about it too. He’s waited far too long to share that amount of vulnerability and comfort with someone. No way he’s ever going to hold back🫂

Autistic Judy my beloved🙌🏻 You cannot convince me she’s even a little bit neurotypical, I will not believe you lol. I love that her natural rabbit behavior could actually be interpreted as stimming!

Dude, I have believed this headcanon for so long!! The second I found out their age difference, I just knew there had to be some kind of coincidence going on there. I mean, Nick could’ve just said “when I was a kid” when beginning the story, but instead he specified his age (or an estimate, at least) and I think that a choice on the writers’ part. Anyway, I’m a big believer in fate/soulmates, so even just the idea of Judy being born, destined to cross paths with Nick someday to heal his childhood trauma and make his life better, just melts my heart❤️😭

Haha yeah, you can tell the concert at the credits that Nick was only there for Judy😆 Not to say he wasn’t enjoying himself, he just wasn’t nearly as enthusiastic as everyone else. But ya know, the things ya do for your girlfriend!😋 I can also imagine Judy listening to music she doesn’t necessarily enjoy either. A certain loud rock song starts playing on the radio and before she can even think about changing the station, Nick goes “oh I like this one!” And so she smiles and suffers through it. She may even end up liking it anyway!😌

As for this last one, I kinda have to disagree. Not to say she isn’t ace or demi, and no hate to anyone who shares this opinion! But idk, to me I don’t think someone not wanting to see a bunch of people walking around ass-naked makes them ace or a prude (which I’ve seen some fanfics try to claim her to be?) I mean, I’m horny asf and I’d be just as uncomfortable walking around a nudist club😆😅

…I never thought I’d type a sentence like that lol

Anyway, thanks for sharing these! I sure hope the fandom comes back someday, but in the meantime I’ll be here waiting and open to exchanging more headcanons! :3

#zootopia #judy hopps #nick wilde #wildehopps #judy x nick #headcanons #zootopia headcanons #disney headcanons #long post #asks #lady luxo asks

[pyropsychiccollector]

Natsu Harem: Fairy GET! 2/14

Now that we've covered someone on the younger side... Let's now look to... "maturity". (人◕ω◕) Yes, let's roll with that.

The spitfire Miss Cana Alberona. (人◕ω◕)

When did they meet?

She's been in Fairy Tail as long as Natsu, if not a teensy bit longer (she was there with Gray before Natsu and Erza got brought in). Cana's main goal ever since she came to Fairy Tail was to talk to Gildarts and tell him that they're family, that her mom died and left her in his care. But she was intimidated by him, overwhelmed when come face to face with him... It certainly didn't help that Gildarts left the guild so often on tough jobs.

But in terms of Natsu... They've been childhood friends, the both of them along with Erza, Gray, Mira, Elfman, and Lisanna (Laxus to a lesser extent). Not particularly close, but to be fair they've always kind of done their own thing. Natsu was always so noisy, rolling more with Erza and Lisanna. And Cana largely kept her head down, trying to build up that courage for Gildarts. Eventually, she devoted her efforts to becoming an S-Class mage in order to do just that... Unfortunately, Erza and Mira passed her by and got to that rank first. Cana failed the trial four times...

When did they grow closer?

Natsu and Cana might not have done much together, but they were used to each other's presence in the guild. "Affectionate" in their own ways, occasional barbs at each other, but all in good fun... Natsu never had a clue Cana was his idol's kid. If he had, the Pyro likely would have bugged her more often, if not bugged her to just tell Gildarts already...

And that's probably why Cana never told anyone. This was between Gildarts and her, no one else. Even though it always weighed on her over the years, Cana still lounged around and tried doing something with her life. She was always there when Team Natsu came back from jobs. She was there when the guild went to war with Phantom Lord. She was there when they all went to Edolas...

Eventually, Cana's time came. The next S-Class Trials, and she planned to make this her last attempt regardless. Failing so many times and being unable to talk to Gildarts... It really ate away at Cana. She and Natsu were rivals for these trials, and while they were friends she intended to give this everything she had. If she failed, she'd quit Fairy Tail... Cana was that depressed. Even when Grimoire Heart invaded, Cana was still fixated on the trials, finding Mavis's grave... Only when she found it before everyone else did Cana come to realize she abandoned Lucy and everyone, and she intended to atone for that. She helped take Grimoire Heart down, and after everything settled Cana just confessed everything to Gildarts, even if at first he seemed to not know who her mom was and she was pissed about that... It was a nice moment with her dad, though he became a royal pain after that, all gushy and lovey-dovey...

Acnologia attacked. They were frozen in time for seven years. Cana returned with the rest of the Tenrou team, and they had a lot of catching up to do with their friends they left behind... Cana and Natsu still didn't do much together directly. They just went through various adventures together as a guild - Key of the Starry Sky arc, Grand Magic Games, the Eclipse Spirits, Tartaros, Alvarez... Cana was done moping and dedicated herself to helping her friends. She was more chagrined with her dad more than anything; often so embarrassed by him.... But she did show concern when he went up against August. Beyond that, the guild was her family. And one could say Natsu was a part of that family.

When does friendship turn to something more?

Cana has... a unique flexibility to her that most girls in the harem do not. See, with most girls you can pinpoint an exact time when Natsu started bonding more with them and when love began to grow. With Cana, however... they always are just kinda around each other. Albeit with everyone else around, too.

The way I like to look at it... When Natsu hears about Cana being Gildarts's kid like everyone else does, he starts being nicer to her. Not because he's star-struck by her dad or considers her royalty or something like that... But Cana does have an awesome dad like Gildarts. He doesn't want Cana to waste what time she has with him... Even though GIldarts still runs off on his own so often. Natsu empathizes with her on that front, considering Igneel is still missing... And perhaps that's Cana's "way in", so to speak. How she grows closer to Natsu herself. Naturally, she's exasperated by Gildarts, and considers Natsu's attempts at coaxing her to talk to him more to be annoying... But when Natsu loses Igneel? That may hit Cana close to home. She may try checking in on him more often, even while he's off training on his own. She's got that card magic, after all.

After Alvarez blows over, and all the revelations that come with that, Cana may spend more time with Natsu. He doesn't seem as affected with Zeref's death, or Igneel's, but Cana knows he's hurting deep down... He's just choosing too focus on the bonds he has in the here and now, and Cana can respect that. It's what she did. And... as annoying as he is, Cana doesn't want to imagine losing Gildarts. Cana feels a kindred spirit in Natsu~... Even if he's a scrappy blockhead. Adventures aren't so bad... So long as there's downtime afterward~ And Cana will be there whenever Natsu gets back~...

On Natsu's part.... Cana's been a longtime friend, and he's never been too bothered by Cana's drinking habits. He knows Cana's strong in her own right, and not just because of the blood flowing in her veins. When Cana starts sharing drinks with him more often, even some of her top shelf stuff... Natsu can tell things are getting more serious between them.

Eventually Cana drunkenly asks him what kind of girls he likes... But she gets more direct than that, asking what he thinks of her. Why he's never admired her as much as Erza or Mira. Natsu knows it's mostly drunk ramblings, but there's something about how pouty and broody she is that he can't help assuring Cana he finds her attractive, and accepts her subsequent demand to "prove it" with a date when she's sober. ... Needless to say, Cana's in thfor the shock of her life when Natsu makes good on that promise and she doesn't remember that conversation at all .. Cana doesn't mind giving Natsu a shot, but she isn't expecting much. ... Well, a few dates later and Cana finds she doesn't mind going out with the dense Pyro. Sure, he still edges towards fights, especially when sleazeballs leer at her chest... But there's a charm to having one of the strongest guys in the guild as her boyfriend... (人◕ω◕)

... Now, how Natsu plans to break this to Gildarts..... This is something Cana wants to see. (人◕ω◕)(人◕ω◕)(人◕ω◕)

#Fairy Tail #Cana Alberona #Natsu Dragneel #Natsu x Cana #NaCana

[leovoid]

Hello. I was wondering if you read Naoki Urasawa's "Another Monster". If so, I had a question and I thought an analyst like you could give me your opinion about this.

So very little is stated about Kenzo's family in Another Monster. Let alone the mother.

Tenma's old friend said that it appeared as if Tenma was trying to isolate himself from his father and brothers, but what about his mom? It was said that she was harsh on him and favored her step-sons instead of her own flesh and blood, Kenzo, for no apparent reason. I don't get it. As a stepmother usually one would think they'd favor the child they gave birth to, so why would she so harsh on him and adamant to get rid of him? I know there's no definitive answer for this, but I would like to know people's theories about this. A theory I heard from someone else is that Kenzo might've been "too clingy to mommy", and another one said Kenzo reminded the mother about her ex-husband, but that kinda doesn't make sense because wouldn't the other siblings remind her of the father as well?

Let me know your thoughts, pleaseee

Thank you for the ask and I hope you're having a good day so far ^^ While I did read Another Monster, Its unfortunate to say that I can't really give you a satisfactory answer to the question due to the extremely limited information we have in regards to this. Kenzos mother preferring the stepsons over him for no apparent reason is all the details given to us, but I suppose I could theory craft here and try to rationalize the reasons... At the risk of sounding as if I advocate her behaviors, I believe it was due to how distant Tenma was towards not just his peers but his own family as well "Throughout his life in Japan he made very few friends and didn't forge strong bonds even with his own family, which is one of the reasons given by Dr. Takahashi to explain why Tenma came to Germany and never went back." - Monster Wikia As a child Tenma always stood out for being extremely bright and this caused his father to take deep pride in him, dedicating his hospital to soon be inherited by Tenma once he grows of age. I can only assume that due to this, a lot of attention from Tenmas father was soley on him and not the rest of his offsprings. Due to this I can only imagine that Tenmas mother had very little time to bond with Tenma due to the fathers infatuation of his talent. As such, this lead Tenmas brothers to be shunned and ignored, leaving the mother to be the only one relied on by her step sons while she could have felt Tenma had no need for her since her husband is so hyper-fixated on him. Because of this, I would believe there was a wedge between Tenma and his mother because of how little she has had an influence on his growth and their relationship as mother and son. Adding on to this, it doesn't help that Tenma is so disconnected from everyone purely by choice. Whatever his reasonings are, are factors that were not shown to us but thats another rabbit hole to go through It could just be his mother was a jealous bitch or something idk? LOL It could also be because Tenma for his entire life felt the expectations placed on his shoulders to be unfair and overbearing to what he actually strives to do in his life. It was mentioned that Tenma stood up against a teacher to defend a punishment taken too far by a fellow student, so I can only imagine that Tenma has an opinion of his own as to what injustices are. In an act of rebellion he went to Germany ON A WHIM, and worked in Eisler Memorial hospital where he wished to conduct his research on Alzheimers dementia. Now if we take a look at Monster the series, its clear that this research he dedicated his life to was thrown away from a motivation and purpose he set for himself when he saved Johan. To save all the lives he could, no matter who they are. I believe Tenma up to that point was operating in a rebellious phase towards the expectations put towards him by his father, where the first thing he heard was an opportunity of neuro surgery and decided to drop everything to pursue a goal given to him purely off inspiration whom he thought was written by Dr.Heinamann. Until he met Johan, Tenmas true purpose was given a stable foundation.

#anime #naoki urasawa's monster #monster #anime analysis #kenzou tenma #monster anime #anime discussion

[baltears]

starting to realize that one reason not everyone reads you the same way and some people think it's a dramatically dumber show than it is is bc not everyone is aware of how precise the writers were in creating joe's pathology and the amount of verisimilitude in the writing around his extreme trauma and the resultant extreme behaviors.

joe acts the way that he does because part of him (the inner child) sincerely, very deeply craves love and connection, but bc he grew up in an extremely high stakes survival situation – & never really experienced a life away from his multiple sources of simultaneous extreme threat* and longed-for crumbs of affection & validation & emotional comfort before reaching adulthood – he quite literally cannot help recreating that same completely insane level of high stakes in his own life because that is still how his nervous system is wired. he is too internally fragile to feel like he can withstand true inner scrutiny, the type required for deep recovery from trauma. this part is also hard to explain to people who dont have this type of trauma, there's this very pervasive terror that certain things will just somehow annihilate you and swallow you up, such as looking too closely at your feelings, or someone else seeing who you are deep down and rejecting you.

so when joe fixates on someone he has fantasized will save him,** he feels the need to stalk and gather information in order to craft this perfect, completely fabricated self that he knows will not be rejected the way he thinks his real self automatically would be, bc deep level rejection also = annihilation. and because his mom (and i'm not trying to be harsh here, she is also a victim and a survivor, just being real) failed in her handling of the situation with his dad and further failed in her handling of joe killing him, child joe forms this impression in his brain and nervous system that "situations that i am involved in can unpredictably escalate to extreme violence", and "extreme threat to my feelings/emotional self also goes along with extreme threat to my physical body and life". this impression never changes. he never unlearned this. so what he ends up doing is unconsciously creating circumstances where this will happen because it is familiar &he never really learned how to function in situations where the threat level is "normal". when he gets rejected or the threat of abandonment comes up or anything else goes wrong, he immediately internally escalates to maximum threat response and is prepared to resort to extreme violence in order to 'protect' himself and/or a woman or a child. i just feel it's worth noting that the vast majority of human interactions do not and would not escalate unpredictably to extreme violence, and the reason it keeps happening around joe is because he (again, unconsciously- this is a nervous system level response) either creates it himself or seeks out environments where this level of dysfunction is the norm. btw the patriarchal obsession with protecting women comes from a combination of misogyny + a deep mostly unconscious need to justify killing his dad to protect his mom because his entire self worth hinges on whether that would make him a bad person who deserves to die.***

he manipulates others as a survival tactic by mirroring them and saying what he can usually tell they want to hear, but actually does it so constantly and compulsively that it becomes maladaptive and frequently hurts the social impression he gives (how many times did other characters call him out for being a weird phony?). he compulsively narrativizes himself and his life in bizarre, binaristic, fictional trope-based ways because he coped so hard with books when he was locked in a cage as a kid & had to tell himself stories about what was going on around him and what it meant in order to feel like his existence could withstand his circumstances. i could go on. my point is that i think joe is in a lot of ways actually a very accurate intelligently written and sensitive portrayal of a cptsd victim. like frankly i personally just don't want to have the conversation anymore about whether we're allowed to relate to joe because he does the memey relatable narrator thing and is a white man, those things are not why i find him relatable. yes the "commentary on protagonist status being automatically applied to white men", "commentary on patriarchal norms and how women are de-voiced / objectified and treated as disposable", the genre deconstruction stuff, the topical stuff, the memey stuff, are all vital parts of the show as well and deliver some extremely cogent points and an entertaining viewing experience but what im getting at is this cake has layers. love is also an amazingly written character for very similar reasons and i love all the pov stuff with her in season 3. ok signing off now

*in the case of neglect and abandonment from his mom, which has life or death level stakes for a child, and physical abuse and extreme psychological terrorism from mooney

**i want to briefly draw attention here to the fact that healing fantasies are a vital survival tactic for kids in traumatizing situations, although they can become maladaptive into adulthood – there is a misogynistic flavor to joe's because he is a misogynist deep down, but my point is that the healing fantasy is used to avoid total despair/annihilation in the midst of the extreme pain of trauma. most of the other traumatized characters in the show also display signs of coping with a healing fantasy, and the reason joe is so good at manipulating fellow traumatized people is because he recognizes on an unconscious level how to create the image of a healing fantasy that they will be vulnerable to.

***so, again, life or death level emotional need to uphold this belief system, as we saw in s4 when he hit a point of no longer being able to justify any of his behaviors and very rapidly reached a decision to attempt suicide.

#fyi this is a living document because it is frankensteined together out of the various pieces i remember writing last night #before tumblr threw my painstakingly word-vomited first draft of this post off a cliff. so you may notice me making more edits #you #you series #joe goldberg

[missjanjie]

Need some advice from someone not invested in the situation,so don't mind the vent:

My mother is hell-bent on my returning to complete a degree programme that I was in when I was a teenager (17 or so). Here's the thing though. I was so unhappy doing this programme that I couldn't even go to class without getting anxious or wanting to throw up. Grades-wise, I was fine, I suppose(the pass mark for this particular degree was a B, so 60%). But I grew to hate the programme itself because my anxiety was through the roof.

So, my Registrar saw the state I was in and suggested that I take a break and do an unassociated(heh) Associate Degree till I got myself together mentally. As of currently, I'm the top student in that particular Associate Degree and having a great time(and my anxiety's practically non-existent).

Here's the issues though. My mother hates that I've "downgraded" myself by doing an Associate Degree and continues to insist that I was "tricked" into doing it by the Registrar(who was genuinely trying to help). So,to fix my supposed "mistake", I should immediately return to the original Bachelor's Degree I was doing and complete it (despite the visceral trauma it caused me) because "everyone else in your age group has Master's Degrees and PHDs and you have nothing to show" (I'm 22).

But the thing is, why not get a Bachelor's Degree in a different subject area? I'm not opposed to higher education at all,but she's so fixated on the original Bachelor's Degree (in STEM) that I was doing that she can't let it go. She brings it up every chance she gets. I could be drinking a glass of water and she'll find a way to bring it up. Going so far as to say that it's what God wants me to do(I'm sure God wouldn't want me actively having panic attacks while doing what He supposedly wants me to do, but I digress).

So,yeah. What do I do? Where do I even go from here? If I make suggestions about an alternate path,she'll either ignore me, talk over me or segway into talking about my original Bachelor's Degree programme and how I should be graduating right now.

(Sorry for the long rant. Kinda don't have anyone to get my feelings out to IRL.)

unless you live in a weird mensa cult I don’t think people your age have masters/phd’s. people my age don’t have phd’s and only those in specific fields (usually teaching or social work) have masters and im 28.

also i have a little anecdote that while may not provide answers, can offer some perspective. when i was in college i took a feminist studies course and in that class was a 72 year old woman. i initially assumed she was just auditing the class (ie taking it for fun) but she explained to me that she was finishing her degree. i asked her what made her decide then and she told me “sure, i couldve gone back ten years ago or even twenty years ago. but that wasn’t where my journey was taking me.” point being, your journey is yours alone

there isn’t really anything you can do about your mom if you still live with her or are otherwise financially dependent on her except stay the course until you’re able to get out on your own or something like that. im assuming you’re not american based on some spelling, so i don’t really know the university system there so i could be off base

#gen asks #long post

[hannathecartoonlover]

Alright I’m gonna say something you can agree with or not but

I despise 2012 April’s character design for one

I don’t like her outfit it’s kinda bland and I just don’t like it

For two I am good with her having red hair but I wish they put a little more depth into it safe to say I decided to redesign and change 2012 April o Neil

So drumroll please

.

.

.

Introducing!

April O Neil!!!

Okay so I had some ideas for this April

1. She is a 16 year old like in 2012 version

2:

SHE IS NOT A PHYSIC or moves things with her mind

Or half krang she is a regular human girl

She has dreams to become a journalist she is apart of her high school journalism club and also in a turtle club (that she made)

I like the idea that she has a hyper fixation with turtles so when she meets the turtles like Donnie and everyone else she is not scared no she is like fangirling asking them questions on diet what type of turtles they are

Unlike 2012 April my April treats Donnie with a lot more respect instead of like leading him on she’s kinda brain dead that he even likes her

She doesn’t fight alongside them but she is crafty making little trinkets to confuse enemies she is the inside gal getting the info instead of doing the fighting

She is very energetic and hyperactive she is a high functioning autistic she is though a huge extrovert

Her mother isn’t part krang she is a regular woman she is a biologist but did have a part in studying the krang they were furious of being taken and tested on so they kidnapped Aprils mom her dad is protective but helps her and the turtles

Now the relationships she has with the turtles well start with Donnie

Donnie: April and Donnie out of all the turtles are the closest she is always asking questions about his inventions Donnie (obviously) has a crush on her because of this she is so well…energetic sometimes it’s hard for him to handle her but he cares about her

(Though they don’t end up together)

Leo : honestly Leo and April are honestly like a father trying his daughter not to get killed and always tries to make sure she doesn’t well die he is impressed by her ability to learn quickly and also her ability to be able to get some interesting information from her love of studying she is able to look into the latest news info because of her dad being a reporter

Raph:

Honestly when raph first met April he was scared not because she was human but how energetic she is she is always asking him questions about everything and raph gets a little annoyed but he does have to admit he respects her fighting spirit..

And the youngest

Mikey honestly these two are peas in a pod they both had chaotic younger sibling energy April likes to teach Mikey different things since he enjoys being around her she also loves ice cream kitty and honestly gets along

I hope you all like this interpretation of April I wanted to give her more personality I guess

And do my boi Donnie justice…

Because I just hate how April lead him on I prefer well 2018 April which I kinda based her off

Some aprils from the past and smoosh them together

#tmnt rise #rottmnt april #april o'neil #2012 april sucks #Tmnt #tmnt redesign #2012 tmnt #tmnt headcanons #April o Neil 2012 redesign

[dwarfsized]

10 characters/10 fandoms/10 tags

the always amazing @aevallare tagged me <3 sooooo:

Astarion Ancunin (Baldur's Gate 3) - getting the obvious one out of the way early. you put a character in front of me who gets mad at you for being good and kind because no one has ever been that to him, who is a bitch and that's a feature not a bug, and im not supposed to become deeply obsessed with that? he is everything. to me.

Gideon Nav (The Locked Tomb) - tamsyn muir WHEN will my wife come back from the war? Devotion even when you hate it. Being a weapon in more ways than even you are aware of. Love when you don't know what love is, really, getting it wrong and right at the same time. Gideon @ Harrow is just "its rotten work. especially to me especially if its you. i'll fucking do it but christ alive."

Murderbot (The Murderbot Diaries) - i think i am one of the only people who thinks that Murderbot is on the fem-presenting side of androgynous but i do think that and i'm right. I haven't read the latest book yet. Being forced to interrogate an in-between space, Murderbot's "dont look at me" in combination with vulnerability, the desire to cut and run and figure yourself out and then, like. not actually figuring yourself out much. did the running help? did escaping do anything? or should you have stayed?

Stede Bonnet (Our Flag Means Death) - Cringefail fuck-up pirate my beloved, i hate watching him do things it's like looking in a mirror. Theater kid playing dress up, steeped in self-doubt and trying to get everyone to talk about their feelings. In season one he looks at his own life and says "is anyone going to ruin this?" and doesn't wait for an answer. I want to kiss him in the moonlight. Every time I think about him I want to throw up. <3

Keyleth (Critical Role) - The weight of the world on her shoulders because she's been raised to lead her people, and all that simmering rage she tries to keep under wraps, and then she only gets a tiny bit of time with the person she loves before she has to live for years and years and years and watch everyone she cares about leave her. Archdruids with timeless body are an existential nightmare.

Alex Louis Armstrong (Fullmetal Alchemist) - okay listen. when i rewatched fmab in college, I was fully ready to fall in love with Riza. I was very surprised when I realized that it was not the badass with the gun I was fixated on, but the. big muscle-y guy who cries a lot and gets used for comic relief 60% of the time. but. im here. i love him. the ishval flashbacks got to me.

Blue (This is How You Lose the Time War) - Loving someone enough you're willing to let them close enough to kill you. The inherent rot beneath blooming things. Taking the slow path. Not leaving well enough alone. Love, but with teeth. I'm so normal about her (lying)

Cora Sabino (Noumena Series) - I wish I could tell everyone to read Axiom's End because I loved it, but I cant because the sequel fucked me up so bad. Its good! but god the atmosphere is so oppressive and Cora's struggle with depression is extremely real for an alternate history story that asks the question "what if we found out aliens were real during the bush administration?" I was legitimately unwell.

Obi-Wan Kenobi (Star Wars) - I just think he's the funniest guy with a laser sword. so repressed. had one of the most grey-jedi masters to ever do the damn thing. bitchy. the chosen one is his padawan. honestly he had to know anakin was sneaking out to canoodle with padme and just decided it wasn't his problem. calls himself fucking ben on the hell sand planet. why was he like that.

Spock (Star Trek) - this is the most "i just think he's neat" of all of them. i inherited this blorbo. this blorbo was handed down to me from my mom. he was hers first, im just picking up the torch. "guy who acts like he has no emotions but every seven years enters a fuck or die frenzy" im sorry but that's. that's too good. i have no choice but to rotate him in my mind.

I cannot tag 10 people but i will tag @asterordinary and @werewolfnobody and if anyone else wants to do it go for it! tag me so i can read your response!

#this was so difficult but it was fun! #tag game