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spacebarbarianweird · 7 months

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Astarion x f!reader. We Shall Meet Again

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Astarion and Tav are talking about life and death and end up talking about children tags: fluff, comfort, conversation about death and mortality Astarion mentions he wants to step into the sunlight once Tav dies so consider it a trigger warning Read on AO3

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"Please, Astarion, I can walk on my own!" You try to free yourself, but the vampire drags you on his shoulders like a lifeless sack.

"No, you can't," he replies.

You let out a sigh of frustration. If only Astarion could see your expression, he would witness your disappointment.

The task seemed simple enough. The villagers promised a reward for getting rid of a troublesome troll. It should have been a routine quest for a pair of seasoned adventurers like you. And it had been until the troll hurled you against a tree. Astarion swiftly dealt with the monster, then hoisted you onto his shoulders, and now the two of you were making your way back to the village to get the reward.

"Please, just put me down," you implore.

"Your leg is broken," Astarion insists.

"No, it's not!" You let out a cry of pain as he touches the injured limb. "Fine, you win!"

Astarion chuckles softly as you continue to observe the grass and flowers below. Eventually, the fatigue overtakes you, causing you to black out. When you open your eyes again, you find yourself back in the village.

"We've agreed on five golden coins! Take your reward and go!"

"Yes, but my wife broke her leg, and now I must pay the healer," Astarion argues with a rogue smile. "Eight golden coins."

"Six! We haven't paid the tithe yet!"

"Seven. And your village healer cures her for free."

"Fine! But I don't want to see either of you ever again!"

"It can be arranged!"

The village chief throws a sack of gold to Astarion, and the vampire performs a theatrical bow as if on a stage. Then, he approaches you and gently kisses your forehead, his lips curving into a grin, though a hint of concern lingers in his crimson eyes.

"Don't worry, I'm too young to die just yet," you say as you caress his left cheek, and he closes his eyes, savoring the touch like a content cat.

"I know, but when that thing threw you at the tree, I thought for a second," he stumbles, his voice tinged with worry. "I thought you wouldn't get up."

You remember the wave of pain, the buzz in your ears, and Astarion kneeling beside you, carefully letting you drink a healing potion. He held you gently, his worry palpable as he waited for the potion to mend at least some damage.

He worries sick every time you get hurt. So do you - Astarion doesn't take physical damage easily.

The healer finally arrives, visibly annoyed that he was woken up in the middle of the night. He casts a spell on your leg, and you hear a gruesome sound as the bones fuse back together.

"You could at least be grateful for slaying that troll," you mutter.

The healer lets out a string of curses and leaves.

"Well, I think it's best if we find a spot to make camp before the sunrise," Astarion says.

"I don't think it would be safe to stay in the village anyway. They might start suspecting you're a vampire," you reply as the houses fade into the distance.

"Ungrateful lot," he chuckles.

You take his hand, and you together go into the night. It's been five years since you met at the shipwreck, five years since your unlikely union evolved into something deeper. You haven't grown tired of each other; if anything, you've grown closer, and you can't imagine spending a single night without Astarion by your side.

You are not even sure if you can fall asleep without him cuddling you.

You affectionately refer to each other as "wife" and "husband," even though there was no formal ceremony. One day, Astarion slipped a ring he'd found in a dungeon onto your finger, and you did the same after obtaining a similar one. It was as simple as that.

… The two of you stop and set up a tent as the skies lighten. The tent is crafted from thick, black material and reinforced with a darkness spell - a perfect daylight shelter for a vampire.

You've grown accustomed to the routine. At sunrise, you both go to sleep. When you wake up well past noon, Astarion stays inside, engrossed in the books you've collected on your adventures, while you head out to hunt. But sometimes, you keep the vampire company as he reads aloud.

And once the sun sets, you hit the road again. Both of you share the desire to see the world, and you want to see it together.

Exhausted from a long day of walking and the battle with the troll, you immediately fall asleep. When you wake up, you see Astarion sitting beside you, reading one of his books. The rain is pounding the tent and you feel the cold.

"Good morning," you whisper, and he runs his gentle fingers through your hair. His crimson eyes are brimming with love, but you detect an underlying unease in him.

You've always respected his privacy, but you can't help but notice his recent unease.

"Is everything all right? Do you want to talk?" You sit up, peering at the small entrance tent, shivering.

"It seems I can't keep any secrets from you," he sighs in relief. "I just… got scared yesterday. When that thing threw you. When you fell. Damn, you looked like a ragdoll! Then the troll tried to pick you up to smash you again. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to save you. That you would die."

You say nothing, resting your head on his shoulder and listening to his steady breathing.

"That's stupid. You're here. Everything is great," he says.

You sense that he doesn't honestly believe it. Mortality. Your mortality is what's troubling him. He's undead, immortal. He can only die if someone kills him or if he steps into the sun. But you will grow old and eventually pass away if you're not killed earlier.

A sudden urge to leave the tent and return at sunset washes over you, but you suppress it. You both need to address this, no matter how uncomfortable it is.

"What do you think you will do when I die?" you ask him gently.

He stares at you in horror and disbelief, as if he can't believe you've broached this topic.

"I - I don't want to have this conversation," he mutters.

"Astarion, please. We have to talk about this. My love, I know it makes you uncomfortable, but we must discuss it."

He clenches his teeth. "You can't even comprehend how much."

"I actually can because you don't seem to care about your safety, and there's a very high chance I could end up a vampire widow."

You sit before him, taking his hands and gently tracing the knuckles.

He remains silent, and the only sound is that of raindrops outside. The comfort of the warm tent makes you decide not to venture into the rain.

"I will step into the sun once you die. It's not up for discussion," he says resolutely. "I'll bid you farewell, go outside, and see the sunshine one last time. Don't worry. I'll be with you till the end."

A knot forms in your stomach as you suddenly envision Astarion cradling your lifeless body, waiting for the sun to rise.

"Don't," you abruptly say. "Don't do this."

"Well, it won't be up to you to decide," he says, his voice sending shivers down your spine. Astarion turns his head away, a signal that he wants to be alone with his thoughts.

"Okay, I'll go for a walk," you suggest, wanting some fresh air, but he grabs your hand.

"Don't be ridiculous. I don't want you to catch a cold," he insists, pulling you closer. You rest your head against his chest and you sit together in silence, lost in your thoughts.

"Astarion," you whisper. "Let me tell you something."

"If it's about death again, I'm not interested."

You hug him tightly. "No, it's about… the opposite, actually."

You carefully choose your words. "My people… My people believe in rebirth. We believe that we don't stay dead forever."

You pause, studying Astarion's face, but his pale features remain unreadable.

"When I was little, I was told that our souls come back. In a century, in a millennium. Memories return, and an old personality reawakens. It only happens to some; some are forgotten and never return. That's why we tell stories about our deceased ancestors – to help them find their way back home. Their souls must feel loved to get back."

You hug him even tighter, fearing his reaction.

"Astarion, my love, please, don't step into the sun when I die. Live. I want you to live, see the lands we won't see together, and experience things we won't experience together."

He sobs, and you look up to see his eyes closed, silent tears streaming down his beautiful face. You gently stroke his white curls.

"I want you to talk about me, to tell people stories about my adventures, about who I was. You love me deeply, and if my people are right about souls and resurrection, your memories will be the most powerful beacon in the darkest sea of death."

You release Astarion, who still avoids looking at you directly, seemingly embarrassed about his tears.

"And when that time comes, I will find you. I will embark on a quest to seek my vampire husband, and we shall meet again. You will tell me everything about the places you've visited and your adventures. People you've met, quests you've completed. Everything."

You cup Astarion's face, making him meet your gaze.

"Promise me that, my love. Promise me you will keep living." You kiss his forehead, and your heart swells when you see his smile.

"I promise," he says. "I promise I will keep going."

He lets his tears go and you are proud of him for not concealing the emotions. Then he cocks his heads and grins.

"I'll take your word for that because if I'm reincarnated and never find you, I'll be truly upset," you playfully remark.

"So will I if I keep my promise and you never return," he chuckles.

You plant kisses on his cheeks and share a lighthearted laugh.

"Are you going outside?" he asks. "It seems like it's not raining anymore."

He returns to the book he was reading.

"Go, I don't want you to stay locked in here," he insists.

"Nah, it's too cold. I'd better stay inside with you. What are you even reading there?" You try to snatch the book from his hands, but he closes it and attempts to put it away. "Since when are you embarrassed about your reading preferences?"

You try to grab the heavy black volume, but Astarion catches you and playfully puts you on your back, causing uncontrollable giggles. Now, you can't get up but still manage to stretch your hand toward the book.

"What is this?" You open it. "Dhampirs share many qualities with vampires. They walk the line between living and dead, gain heightened abilities, and have a life-draining bite. Children of vampires and mortals, they are few in number…"

You stumble. Children of vampires and mortals…

Astarion blushes. "I found this book in the troll lair. I never knew that vampires could have children. Like, real children, not cursed spawns."

You open another page with pictures depicting a young human woman with vampire fangs.

"It's written that dhampirs aren't hurt by the sun" he continues. "And they don't need blood to survive. They can easily blend with mortals, but at the same time, they are strong as the undead," he pauses. "It's like being a vampire without downsides."

Half-vampires. Dhampirs. You vaguely remember hearing about them many years ago. Is it possible for you and Astarion to have a child? And would it be right to bring a dhampir into this world?

"Now you're thinking about it too," Astarion observes.

"Guilty," you admit, still lying beneath him. You touch his back, feeling the scars through his shirt. He smiles, enjoying the sensation.

"Speaking of mortality and my promise," he continues, "I think I'll find it easier not to step into the sunlight if I have someone to care for. It would be cruel," he kisses you. "To leave a child without both parents."

You giggle.

"Am I getting this correct? You want me to give birth to a silver-curled dhampir so you won't be lonely?" you tease, pressing Astarion tighter. He doesn't answer, too occupied with undressing you.

A child. Your mind pictures a little girl who resembles both you and Astarion. A progeny. Someone to carry a piece of you both into the future.

"I don't mind," you finally say. "I actually really want this."

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 astarion #bg3 #bg3 fic #bg3 fanfiction #astarion x reader #astarion x female reader #astarion fic #astarion fanfic #astarion romance #spacebarbarian fics

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javierpena-inatacvest · 2 months

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Chapter 20 pt. 1- I Do

Summary: It's finally here, the day you've been waiting for since the day Javi came into your life and changed it for the better- It's your wedding day, and things couldn't be more perfect. Except for the fact that you and Javi can barley contain your excitement as you wait to see each other.

Word Count: 11.4K (If this wasn't 2 parts, this would be 30k long and wouldn't be finished until May)

Warnings: SMUT (18+) oral (f receiving), vaginal fingering, praise kink, marriage kink (?), kind of semi-public sex (they're gettin' busy in the bathroom), Kind of getting caught (Steve needs to mind his own business), wedding things!!, family dynamics, mentions of death/grief, lots of emotions, Javi being an anxious, blubbering, hot mess, Javi being so in love and is so excited to spend the rest of his life with you that it physically hurts me (this chapter is lots of fluff and feelings and not as much smut, sorry!! Don't worry, there's PLENTY more to come next chapter 🤪)

A/N: Hi friends!!! Well, she's finally here, the moment we've all been waiting for- our two favorite idiots are finally getting married 😭💕 While I would have loved to make this one chapter, it literally would have been SO long, and Lord knows when I actually would have finished with it. So this chapter is the morning leading up to the ceremony, and part 2 will be the ceremony and reception!! I'm not even gonna lie, I bawled several times writing this chapter. These two mean so much to me, and I'm so honored that you care enough about them to be invested in my silly little story, too 🥺 HAPPY WEDDING DAY!!!

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For the better part of his life, Javier Peña was convinced there was nothing more soul-crushingly painful and miserable than a wedding. On a day that was supposed to be filled with happiness and joy, Javi had spent more years than he’d like to admit doing anything to avoid the occasion all together. Because for him, weddings had meant none of those things. Weddings had only served as yet another reminder of the failure he had chalked himself up to be.

Leaving Lorraine at the altar and running away to Colombia.

Watching the successes of everyone else’s blissful domestic lives play out in front of him, while he’d never felt so alone.

Convincing himself that he would never be worthy of love because of the terrible person that he’d become.

Weddings had been something that Javier Peña hated more than most things in life.

But that was until he met you.

Because today, on the morning of his own wedding, Javi was quite literally bursting at the seams with excitement, goofy grin stretched from ear to ear knowing that in a few short hours, he got to marry the most amazing, beautiful, perfect woman he had ever met. And even though the reality had set in that today was finally the day the two of you started your forever together, he was positive that he’d never get over the reality that you would always be his.

As he pulled his truck up the driveway to your new home where he should have been sleeping for the better half of last night, there was a part of him that couldn’t have been more thankful he had been able to sneak in just a few more hours with you before sunrise, knowing the anxious anticipation of waiting to see you all day, let alone see you in your wedding dress at the other end of the aisle, was enough to already have his heart beating a million miles a minute at the ripe hours of the morning.

While he should have known better his Dad would already be well awake by the time he snuck back home, Chucho’s welcoming grin from the front porch was already laced with enough forgiveness for Javi to hope he’d be spared at least some shit from his father.

“”Morning, mijo.” Chucho chuckled, watching Javi’s sheepish stride up the driveway towards the house, slowly sipping on his cup of coffee with a boyish grin on his face, knowing damn well where his son had been without having to say a word.

“I already know what you’re gonna say, Pops.” Javi sighed, shaking his head in embarrassment as he approached his dad, letting out a soft grunt as he took a seat next to his father on the top step of the front porch.

“I haven’t said anything, Javier. Do you have something you want to say?” Chucho couldn’t help but snicker, raising his eyebrows at his son, as he watched his cheeks turn a petrified pink.

“Nope, I am- oh, fuck me- nope I am, uh, all good.” Javi stammered, burying his hands in his face before running them through the sleepy curls of his hair and over the nape of his neck, his eyes still peeled to the ground, avoiding Chucho’s smug grin.

“Then all I have to say is,” Cucho paused, taking another swig of coffee, “I hope you never stop loving her the way that you do now.” Javi looked up at his dad in confusion, wondering how his sneaking out wasn’t shaping up to be some sort of teenage scolding from his father. “I already know that you know you are a very, very lucky man Javier, but I also hope that you know you are going to make a wonderful husband. Eres un buen hombre. Estoy muy feliz por ti, mijo. Tu madre también lo estaría. Muy feliz.” (You are a good man. I am so happy for you, son. Your mom would be, too. So happy.)

Letting his eyes shift off his feet where they had been stuck, Javi looked back up at his father, tears welling in his eyes at Chucho’s reassuring smile, reaching out to wrap his arm around his son, pulling him close enough to let Javi’s head fall on his shoulder, the two sitting for a quiet moment in silence.

Javi couldn’t help but feel a twinge in his heart, thinking about the fact his mom wouldn’t be with him for the biggest day of his life. His mother had left this world when Javi was at his lowest- alone and halfway across the globe, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in. It had always haunted him that his mom had died worried that her son had become a broken man, and would never be proud of the person he’d turned out to be. When he returned home, he felt even worse thinking that his one living parent probably felt that way, too.

But what brought him solace in a time that he needed it most, was you. You had given him a reason to make his parents proud, to make himself proud. While his mom would never be able to tell him the words he so desperately longed to hear, he knew in his heart that the life he’d built because of you was all the comfort he needed to prove to himself Lucia was smiling down on him when he needed it most. And as he looked up at the sky, the pink and orange rays of the beautiful sunrise beginning to spill over the horizon, he had never been more sure that even though his mom couldn’t physically be by his side, that Lucia Peña would still be with him every step of the way.

“Fuck, I miss her, Pops. I wish she was here.”

“She is, Javier. She always will be.”

After soaking in a few more quiet moments together staring out into the shimmering sunrise, Chucho let out a content sigh, giving Javi a gentle pat on the back and rustling the dark curls of his son’s thick hair.

“But, if there is one thing I know about your Mother, it’s that I can practically hear her screeching at us wasting our time being sad about her on the happiest day of your life. Chucho, por qué piedres el tiempo estar triste? Basta de quejarte! Nuestro hijo se está casando, pendejo!” (Why are you wasting your time being sad! Stop moping! Our son is getting married, stupid.) Chucho mocked, shaking his head at the sky at the scolding he knew he’d be getting from his wife, making him and Javi burst into laughter. “And, if there’s another thing I know about your mother,” Chucho paused again, letting out a loud grunt as he pushed himself up to stand, resting his arm on Javi’s shoulder, “it’s that her and I would both agree there better be a nieto (grandchild) in our lives 9 months from now. Dios mío (oh my God), Javier, even on the night before your wedding you two can’t keep your hands to yourselves! I am truly surprised I don’t have 14 grandchildren already.”

“Jesus fucking Christ, Pops….” Javi whispered to himself over his dad’s schoolgirl snickers, watching his son’s face fall flush once again, standing up to follow behind his dad back inside as Chuhco began to waddle his way across the porch.

Although Javi could have tried to plead his case to his dad to prove his innocence, truth be told, today, he really didn’t care. Today, the only thing he cared about was that in just a few short hours, he got to meet you, his wife, at the end of the aisle and spend his forever with the woman he loved more than life itself. For the first time in his life, Javier Peña couldn’t have been more excited for a wedding.

You weren’t sure how many more times you had read the scratchy print scribbled across the bright yellow post-it Javi had left behind on his pillow before he had snuck out for the morning, but you did know that your heart beat faster and faster in anxious anticipation with every glance over his words, counting down the second until you got to see him again.

You had kept yourself in your room, convinced that your excited impatience would have you awake well before everyone else still sleeping at the ranch, but as you heard clanging and bickering starting to echo from the kitchen, you should have known better that your mom and Connie would be up to something to kick start your wedding day.

With a yawn and stretch of your arms above your head, you flopped yourself out of bed, exchanging Javi’s worn t-shirt and sleep shorts for the white pajama set your mom had insisted she buy for you to get ready in as a compromise for your adamant despise at the white silky robe that had “bride” stitched across it in big pink letters that she had begged to buy you.

Shuffling down the hallway, the commotion in the kitchen only became increasingly louder, now realizing almost everyone must be awake for whatever antics were taking place for the early hours of the morning. As you turned the corner, you were greeted by an adorable “Happy Wedding Day!” banner that had been made by the girls hanging on the wall, decorated with adorable crayon drawings of flowers, you and Javi, and all of the horses of the Peña ranch dressed in wedding apparel. As your eyes scanned across the rest of the room, the kitchen table was already full of breakfast, balloons dangled from the ceiling, and your mom and Connie were actively working on filling up what was most likely one too many glasses of mimosas.

“Happy wedding day, Auntie Bear!” A little voice cooed behind you, looking down to see a still very sleepy Olivia, hair still crazed and bed ridden as she wrapped herself around your hip, squeezing you in a tight hug.

“Ahhhhh, there’s the bride!!” Your mom shrieked, her pitch enough to make everyone in the room wince as she barreled towards you, joining Olivia to engulf you in her grasp. After everyone had recovered from your mom’s shrill greeting, everyone else had soon joined in on squeezing you in a giant group hug, the gesture in itself making you smile, but the physical restraint in the middle of a human sandwich being a little too much for you this early in the morning.

“Thanks guys. I uh, I would like to make it out alive for my wedding so maybe if we don’t squish me to death, that would be great.” You grunted, trying to wriggle out of the arms squishing your body, hoping that someone would get the hint.

“Alright, I think she’s probably had enough.” Connie laughed, finally noticing the look on your face, prompting everyone to give you at least a little breathing room.

“I’m just so excited for you! I can’t believe you’re getting married, sweetie!” Your mom, clearly not picking up on the hint, was now back to squeezing you in a bear hug again tight enough to make your eyes pop out of your head. “Okay, sorry, sorry, I’m done now, just had to get one last one out of my system… for now. Here, have a seat, honey,” Your mom gestured towards the kitchen table, pulling out a chair for you to sit in, “we have about an hour before we have to start doing hair and makeup but we have plenty of breakfast for you to choose from before we get the day started. How’d you sleep?”

“Oh, um- fine, I um, I slept fine.” You lied, now sheepishly staring down at the overflowing plate of breakfast food your mom had set in front of you, taking a hefty bite of pancake before looking back up, your eyes meeting Connie’s, a suspicious smirk gleaming on her face as she stared at you, crossing your arms over your chest as you swallowed your food with a more audible than intended gulp.

“Oh good!” Your mom replied, obvious to yours and Connie’s silent interaction as she meandered around the kitchen. “Well, eat up, I’m off to go check on some things outside, but by the time I get back in here, that plate better be cleared! Girls, come help Grandma, let your Aunt finish her breakfast!”

“Okay!” Your nieces giggled, following behind your mom into the backyard, leaving you and Connie alone in the kitchen, hearing her silently laugh to herself as she sat down next to you at the table.

“Good sleep, huh? Good sleep that definitely had nothing to do with Javi’s truck that left here at 6:00 AM this morning?” Connie snickered, giving you a little wink as your cheeks turned pink with embarrassment, letting out a defeated sigh.

“I promise it’s not what you think. I actually couldn’t sleep and I called Javi and he ended up coming over so I wouldn’t be up the whole night. I told him he didn’t have to, but I was up and stressed and having him here was the only thing that was going to help. It was just sleep, I promise.”

“It’s okay, I believe you. I couldn’t sleep the night before my wedding either. I’m pretty sure if I did what you had done, Steve would have slept right through the phone call, or still would have been too drunk to drive over.” The two of you quietly giggled to yourselves as Connie reached out for your hand, holding it in hers, “I hope you know that he loves you so much. It always broke my heart to see Javi go through what he did, and how hard on himself he was because of it. You really are the best thing that could have ever happened to him. I’m so happy for the two of you, I couldn’t be more excited for today, honey.”

Reaching across the table, Connie wrapped her arms around you, squeezing you in another hug, trying to hold back your sniffles as you felt happy tears beginning to well in your eyes.

“Thank you, Connie.”

“Of course. Now, you better pick what you want from that breakfast and throw away the rest before your mom gets back, I don’t think either one of us wants to be responsible for telling her that her food wasn’t sufficient enough for you.”

You snorted, rolling your eyes at the thought of the dismay your mom would be in thinking that you didn’t get enough to eat before your big day as you put a reasonable amount of breakfast on a new plate to eat, discarding the other heaping pile that your mom had left you.

“You are a smart woman, Connie Murphy.”

“So I’ve been told.”

The rest of the morning seemed to move by at an exponential pace- At the Pena ranch, hair and makeup was well underway for everyone, and running on time with incredible efficiency from the detailed schedule that your mom and Connie had put together. Even though your body was riddled with endless amounts of anxious anticipation and excitement as the clock ticked closer and closer to when Javi and the rest of the boys would finally get here, you were pleasantly surprised at how fun the morning had ended up being with all the girls, especially since your nieces and the Murphy girls had insisted on putting on a hilarious sing along spectacular for the majority of the time for entertainment while you got ready.

Over at your new house, however, with the only getting ready that Javi needed to do being taking a shower and putting on his suit, the boys were convinced that he was going to put a hole in the floor from his anxious pacing as he counted down the minutes to leave.

“Jav, have a beer, man, you just put this floor in, I think your wife’s gonna be pissed when she finds out she has to replace it before y’all even move in because you can’t sit still.” Steve chuckled, taking a sip out of his can before nudging your brothers sitting next to him on the couch as they watched their friend and future brother in law tread back and forth across the living room for what felt like the 117th time since they’d sat down.

“I think I have to agree with Steve on this one, Javier, you are making me anxious and I’m not even the one getting married.” Chucho chimed in from the armchair seated next to the couch.

“I’ll second what Steve said, man. Have a beer, Javi. You haven’t shut up all day about how fuckin’ excited you are, so what’s got you so worked up? You’ve seen her in a dress before dude, this one’s just white.” Your brother David snorted, his joke now soliciting some eye rolls from the rest of the boys, considering David was about single as they came, and was the only one of the group who wasn’t even remotely close to being married.

“It’s a fucking wedding dress, you dingus, there’s obviously a difference.” Your dad groaned, walking up to your brother to give him a prompt smack in the back of the head, making your other brother Charlie snicker to himself, until he also decided to greet him with an equally harsh slap for good measure.

“What the fuck was that for? I didn’t say anything!” Charlie winced, holding his hands up in defense.

“Tell your brother to stop being an ass! She’s your sister too, for Christ’s Sake, you’re not gonna stand up for her either?! Jesus you two are the biggest idiots I’ve ever met. Even Patrick would have had enough common sense to keep that one in his head. Well, maybe not, but that’s besides the point.” That one at least cracked a little smile from your brothers, wishing that Patrick would have been here to see their sister’s big day, and to distribute the slapping pain more equally between the pair.

“I just… Fuck, I just wanna see her. I can’t wait to see her. I’ve never wanted anything so bad in my whole life. The suspense is fucking killing me.” Javi signed, resting one hand on his hip before running his hand through his hair, anxiously drumming his fingers on his side, foot tapping on the well worn path he had been treading on the hardwood floor of the living room.

Chucho chuckled, resting his hands on his knees and pushing himself up to stand with a low grunt, making his way over to his son, resting his hand on his shoulder as he looked up at him. “Eres como tu madre.. Impaciente. (You are just like your mother… Impatient). Mijo, I remember when I married your mother, she was so excited that she actually asked if we could start the wedding an hour early, just so we could see each other sooner. I can almost hear her laughing at the fact that her son is no better than her. How I wish she were here to see this. Soon, Javier. I promise.”

“Do you think she’s gonna like the gift? You made sure she has it for today, right? And everything from her brothers too?” Javi asked, nervously biting at the tip of his thumb as he glanced down at his father before looking over at David and Charlie sitting on the couch, smiling back at him.

“Yes, Javier. I triple checked last night. I’m sure that she will love it. I know she will love it. All of it. Now, why don’t you go put on your suit and we can leave a little ahead of schedule, I will just make sure to drive extra slow. Even slower than normal. I think if we wait any longer you may actually combust.” He teased, pulling Javi into a tight hug before releasing him, giving him a gentle pat on the back.

“Alright boys, you heard the man, get your sorry asses moving and let’s get these monkey suits on, it’s time to get this boy married!” David cheered, holding up his beer to toast Javi before promptly chugging the rest of it down his throat and slamming it down on the table, soliciting another round of eye rolls and muffled laughter from the crowd.

Silently nodding and smiling to himself, letting out one last reassuring breath before looking at the boys standing in front of him.

“Fuck. I’m gonna get married.”

Back at the ranch, the last of getting ready was beginning to wrap up, all the girls' hair and makeup finally finished, and the youngest of the crew giddily dancing in their flower girl dresses, twirling and swirling in excitement at their pristine outfits as they gathered around you, patiently awaiting for you to get into your own wedding dress.

For as long as you’d wanted to get married, you’d always known that you wanted your wedding dress to be simple- No excessive frills, poof, glitter, or anything that made you feel like you were playing dress up for the world’s goofiest fashion show, simply because it was your wedding, and your dress needed to reflect the extravagance of the event. Your style choice came as a surprise to no one, given the fact you had practically lived in your brother’s hand-me-down’s until the 8th grade, and even when your mom had flown down a few months ago to go dress shopping with you and Connie, she had even laid down the hammer with one of the wedding dress consultants that you wouldn’t even step anywhere near a dress that was an ounce too over the top.

That’s why you were absolutely shocked that despite your firm parameters around what you wanted to wear for your big day, that you fell in love with the very first dress you tried on, and never looked back.

It was everything you wanted and never you needed in a dress- a simple a-line skirt with thin straps that ran across your shoulders and scooped down your back, along with a delicate, lacy floral pattern stitched across your top that flowed down the wispy length of your gown. There were few times that you had ever admitted it to yourself, but you had truly never felt more beautiful than when you were wearing that dress, and when you had tried it on for the first time, only to turn around to see the tears welling in your mom and Connie’s eyes as you revealed it to them, it was every confirmation that you needed that this dress was made for you.

And while you had been counting down the days in excitement, waiting to put your dress on for your big day, Javi had been counting down along with you, to the point where Connie had made the executive decision to keep the dress at her house to prevent any preemptive peeking, considering that Javi had spent every day since you had bought your dress telling you how he couldn’t wait to see how beautiful you were going to look in it, without even knowing a single clue about what you had boughten, besides your lovingly sarcastic and vague “It’s a dress, and it’s white, Jav.”

But after all the time you had spent imagining what it would be like to finally put your dress on for your actual wedding day, you almost couldn’t believe that you were finally here, carefully taking the straps off the hanger where it had been resting, holding the beautiful, white fabric out in front of you with a goofy grin spread across your face, eyeing down the outfit that meant you got to spend forever with your best friend.

“You ready to put it on?” Connie asked softly, her hand resting on your shoulder as she stepped behind you, excitedly gazing at your dress right alongside you.

“Yeah.” You smiled, gently nodding your head as you looked back at Connie, taking one last deep breath before passing off the dress to her before shimmying out of your clothes, letting them fall to a pile on the floor before turning to Connie, stepping into the opening of the dress and carefully pulling each strap over your shoulders while she pulled the zipper along your back, letting out a little sigh of relief as it clasped at the top. With one more long inhale, you slowly turned around to face everyone, eagerly awaiting your reveal, picking up your gown with a little floof as it gently draped around you, meeting the tears and smiles painted across everyone’s faces while they gazed at you.

“Auntie Bear, you look like a princess! Uncle Javi is gonna think that you look like the most beautifulest person he’s ever seen.” Olivia squealed, jumping up and down in excitement before running over to you, wrapping her little arms around your waist in a tight hug.

“Oh sweetheart…. You look absolutely stunning.” Your mom sniffled through her tears, holding her hands crossed over her chest, soaking in your full wedding ensemble.

“You look gorgeous. Like, seriously. I hope you know that Javi’s gonna lose his mind when he sees you in this.” Connie giggled, giving you a wink and a playful nudge, looking you up and down in astonishment.

Stepping over to see yourself in the mirror, your heart skipped a beat to see yourself, your stomach churning with anxious, excited butterflies knowing that you were only getting closer and closer to finally seeing Javi and his reaction, trying your best to not your smirk grow too wide between your warm cheeks, thinking about his reaction.

“You really think he’s gonna like it?” You asked, your eyes still fixed at your reflection in the mirror, gently swaying your lacy, floral skirt back and forth, running your hand against the delicate fabric.

“Honey, I’ve watched that man ogle over you in a hockey jersey. I told the boys they’re in charge of making sure he doesn’t faint when you walk down the aisle.” Your mom teased, Connie nodding her head in agreement.

“I’m gonna second your mom on this one, girl. Steve has a running bet with the guys on how long it takes Javi to cry after he sees you. I think the over/under is 2 seconds, but after seeing you right now, I’m convinced he’s all waterworks from the moment he lays eyes on you.”

Connie’s comment made you laugh to yourself, shaking your head at the idea of Javi instantly bursting into tears from just the sight of you, but when you thought about seeing Javi in his tux (that you had already seen before, multiple times) and what a mess you were going to be, maybe the boy’s betting line didn’t seem so unfair after all.

“Speaking of tears…” Connie smirked at your mom, nodding at her to signify some little secret they seemed to be in on, “There’s one last thing you need to see before… Well, we’ll let you open it up and find out.”

With that, your mom reached over to one of the tables where a white box with a neatly wrapped bow had been hidden, your mom passing it to Connie before then passing it over to you, making you tilt your head in confusion as you took the box in your hands, looking back and forth between your mom, Connie and the box waiting for some sort of explanation.

“What is this?” you questioned, still puzzled as you noticed the gift tag hidden under the bow, gently peeling it open, their suspicious smirks beginning to spread as you read the all too familiar scratchy handwriting inside.

To: Osita

Love: Javi

Now even more confused, you carefully began unwrapping the bow from around the packaging, letting the ribbon fall to the floor, followed by the lid of the box, revealing another longer note from Javi, resting on top of a bed of neatly folded tissue paper. You sat down in one of the chairs close by, letting the box rest on your lap as you held the note in your hands, already beginning to tremble as you felt the tears start to well in your eyes as you began to read.

Osita,

I knew from the moment I met you, that I wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with you. I can’t believe that day is finally here. I hope that this day is everything that you could ever dream it to be.

I hope you know that if I could I would give you everything. The moon, the sun, the stars- if you wanted it, I would give it to you.

But I know that no matter how hard I try, there is one thing I know can’t give to you, and that’s the presence of the people who aren’t with us anymore.

And while I can’t bring back your brother or my mom to be here today, I hope that what’s in this box will remind you that they’ll always be here for you, no matter what.

I know my mom would have wanted you to have this. There’s not a day that goes by that I wish she could have met you. She would have loved you so much. I hope she knows that you’re the best thing that could have ever happened to me.

Your family was able to find something of your brother’s for you to have on here too- I wish I could have met him. I hope he knows how much I love you, and the beautiful and resilient woman you’ve become. I hope he knows how proud I am of you.

I can’t wait to see you, amor. I can’t even imagine how beautiful you look right now. I’m the luckiest man in the world.

I love you more than words, and I promise I’ll spend every day for the rest of my life making sure you know it.

Happy Wedding Day, Osita. Soy tuyo para siempre (I’m yours forever).

-J

You could feel your heart practically exploding after reading what Javi had wrote for you, wiping away the wetness from your cheeks, you took a deep breath as you carefully set down his note next to you before ever so slowly peeling back the layers of tissue paper folded on top of one another, hiding the gift hidden beneath them. As the last layer of the delicate paper was shed, you let out a gasp, you hand covering your mouth in shock as you put together the pieces of Javi’s note and the present now sitting in your lap, looking up at everyone else in the room, nodding back at you with sympathetic smiles and tears in their eyes at your realization.

Not only had Javi had given you his mother’s wedding veil to wear, but stitched in the bottom corner was a patch of Patrick’s old hockey jerseys, a small number 2 from his arm sleeve, the number he had worn for every jersey he had ever played in.

“Oh my… Oh my god? I can’t, I- how did you- oh my god.” You whispered to yourself, your voice trembling in disbelief, tears now streaming down your face as you held the veil in your hands, your thumb gently tracing over the worn patch of Patrick’s jersey, truly too stunned to speak at what Javi had done for you, to make sure a piece of two people who were no longer with you could still be a part of the biggest day of your life.

“Can I put it on?” Your mom asked, smiling at you with tears in her eyes, walking towards you as you nodded, handing her over the veil as she gently nestled it into your hair, straightening it out behind you, even more tears streaming down her face while she watched your reaction in the mirror.

Not only was Lucia’s veil absolutely beautiful, if you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought Javi had asked someone to see what your dress looked like to pick out a veil that matched it perfectly. Like it truly was meant to be.

Still too shocked to form any sort of coherent thought, you stared at yourself in the mirror, silently smiling and crying at your reflection until a soft knock came from outside the bedroom door, making everyone in the room whip their heads around to see all of the boys who had just arrived peeking through the door frame, waiting in anticipation.

“Can we come in? We’re dyin’ to see you, Cubby. Well, the one who’s dyin to see you the most we banished to the outside so he wasn’t even tempted to come in, but the rest of us fools still wanna see you too.” Your dad’s voice chuckled from behind the door, making you break from your crying just enough to let a soft laugh escape from your chest, nodding your head as you turned around to greet the gang gathered at the door.

Growing up the youngest of 3 brothers, sentimental wasn’t a term thrown around in your household very often. Of course you loved your family, and they loved you, but you and your brothers had often joked that it’d probably be easier to projectile vomit than to actually say the words “I love you” eachother. So that’s why when your dad and brothers walked through the door with awestruck looks on their faces, you couldn’t help but start crying even more.

Well, until they actually got a chance to speak.

“Don’t cry you dingus, you’re gonna mess up all your makeup. And god knows how long it took to try and make you look like you didn’t just crawl out of a garbage can.” David quietly snickered, pulling you in for a much gentler than usual headlock before wrapping his arms around you for a legitimate hug.

“Fuck off, David. How many people had to help you put that suit on, huh? You use every last brain cell trying to do up those buttons?” You teased back, trying to wipe the tears that had been rolling down your cheeks before giving him a loving slap to the stomach, making the two of you laugh even more.

“You know his dumbass needed all the help he could get.” Charlie joked, pulling you in for another hug before stepping back to look you up and down, “Not too shabby. You clean up good, Cubby.”

“Thanks Charlie.”

The last one to step towards you was your dad, who you could tell was trying with everything in him not to absolutely burst into tears, putting one hand on your shoulder as he smiled at you. “I’ll say it once and I won’t say it again because you know as well as I do I’m not good with the sappy shit. You look beautiful, Cubby. I’m so proud of you. I know Patrick would have been too. Although that motherfucker is probably pissed at us that we cut the number off of his favorite jersey, but I think he’ll forgive us.” Wrapping you in a tight squeeze, your dad engulfed you in a bear hug, quickly followed by your brothers and your mom, trapping you in the center of their bodies, knowing you all were wishing there was one more person there in your group to fill in your hug.

“I love you guys. Thank you.” You whispered, just loud enough to make sure they could hear, but quiet enough that even though your brothers had heard it, just this once, they wouldn’t give you shit for it. And just this once, everyone seemed to silently agree that they really, truly, did love you too.

After a few more seconds of your group hug, there was another soft knock on the door, followed by another familiar voice, Chucho and Steve now peeking through the doorway to say hello.

“Is it okay if we come in, Mija?” Chuco asked, already halfway through the door in excitement.

“Yes, of course.” You sniffed, breaking free from the middle of your group hug to greet Chucho, less than shocked that his hug was almost tighter than the 4 other members of your family combined.

“Mija… Mija, you look so beautiful. Oh, goodness. I had always saved this veil one day, just in case. And even though it sat in the attic for years, I pulled it out the week that Javier first met you. I don’t think that there was ever a doubt in anyone’s mind that you weren’t the one for him. My sweet Lucia would have been so happy to know that you have given Javier everything he never thought that he deserved. Oh, how I wish with everything she could have been here today to see how happy you make him. But I hope that you know, she would have been so excited that you get to be a part of our family.” He grinned through his tears, stepping back to look at you with a soft smile on his face, gently reaching up to wipe away the wetness on your cheek before pulling you back in for another hug. “I hope you know that Javier is going to be a wreck when he sees you. Poor boy has been in shambles all day waiting to see you.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen the man this anxious. And that’s sayin’ somethin’.” Steve chimed in, laughing to himself. “You look great, sweetheart. Chucho’s right, Javi’s ‘bout to be a goddamn mess.”

As if your heart couldn’t feel any fuller from all of the love and warmth overflowing into the room, you had almost forgotten about the one person that had brought you all together in the first place- Javi.

You could feel the pace of your heart begin to race, your stomach swirling in anticipation as the reality of the situation slowly began to sink in.

Your future husband was here, and there was nothing more in the world that you wanted than to see him. Not soon, not at the end of the aisle, not waiting for you at the altar, right this very second.

“He’s here, right? Javi?” You asked, biting down on your lip to contain the stupid grin growing between your cheeks, swaying back and forth on your heels in childlike impatience. Before you could barely ask your question, all eyes in the room were on your, giving you a collective look that seemed to scream “Seriously? You can’t wait either?” without having to say a word.

As you could hear the beginning rumblings of protest, David stepped in as the most unexpected voice of reason, holding his hands up to the crowd in your defense, trying to silence everyone’s potential disagreement for what you were about to suggest.

“Listen… Y’all know as well as I do that we could hold back these two with iron restraints, and they’d still probably find a way to see each other before the ceremony. And to be quite honest, I am pretty convinced if we don’t let them, one of them is gonna fucking combust, and I am not willing to be held personally responsible for any damages done before you two idiots can even get married.”

Giving you a silent nod of approval, David stepped back to pat your back with the loving force that only a brother could, as everyone else in the room seemed to very quickly agree with his sentiment, joining with head bobs of quiet agreement.

“I’ll go let the big man know you’re comin’. Gotta find some way to redeem myself before I bust his balls in my speech later.” Steve snickered, giving you a quick wink before quickly disappearing out the door to find the man behind it, waiting half as patiently as you.

To say that Javi was disappointed when the boys booted him to the outdoors while everyone else got to go in and see you was the understatement of the year. Even though he couldn’t have been sitting on the front porch of his childhood home for more than 10 minutes, it felt like he had been waiting for hours, counting down each second until the moment he finally got to lay his eyes on you. After about 2 minutes of sitting in his dad’s rocking chair, nervously swaying as his hands shifted between his fingers drumming on his legs and balling up in anxious fists, he pushed himself up to stand, walking off the steps of the porch to pace in the front yard under the warmth of the late June sun.

He had been so preoccupied as he meandered the front of the home, picturing just how breathtaking you would look as you walked down the aisle to greet him- how gorgeous you would be in your dress, your hair, your stunning smile, everything about you that made him look at you and know that he was the luckiest man in the world. That you were his. That you were everything that made him feel like home. It wasn’t until after a few careless steps too far around the corner of the house, that Javi was catching himself from tumbling to the ground as he tripped over a larger than suspected rock underneath him, quietly cursing under his breath while he tried to steady himself, peering down at the ground to see what had almost caused his fall. And when he finally read the words etched into the round stone beneath him, he couldn’t help but laugh at the fact the thing resting below him was none other than the heading that read “Lucia’s Garden”.

“Jesus Christ, Ma, you’re not even here and you’re gonna take me out before the wedding even happens.” Javi chuckled to himself, gently tapping his foot against the rock, staring at the worn and weathered letters of her name. “You know, the very first time Pops met her, he let her work on the garden. I couldn’t believe it, because he barely lets me within 10 feet of here without worrying I’m gonna ruin something. But uh, I think that he knew. I think before he even met her, he already knew that she was the one.”

Letting out a soft sigh, Javi crouched down, squatting next to the stone, gently brushing his thumb across the grittiness, carefully tracing each letter back and forth, praying with every ounce of him that one way or another, she could hear what he had to say.

“I really wish you could be here, Mom. I really miss you. I really wish she could have gotten to meet you. I know that you’d love her.” Javi paused, his eyes beginning to well with tears, letting out a long, shaky exhale to try and compose himself. “She’s so good to me. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve her. She’s made me a better man. A man that I’m proud of. A man I hope you’d be proud of, too.” He paused again, pinching the bridge of his nose before wiping his wet cheeks with the back of his hand. “I know that uh- I know before, um you were gone, that you really worried about me. I know you’d never say it, but um, I could tell. And I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Mom.” His voice was now barely above a whisper, years of guilt and anger bubbling in his chest for the person he’d been, the life his mother had lived to see him play out while halfway across the world, fighting for a cause he wasn’t even sure he believed in anymore.

“But, I um- I just- fuck, I just want you to know that I’m okay. I’m more than okay, now. This is the happiest I’ve ever been, all because of her. We’re gonna build a house, we’re gonna have kids, we’re gonna be so happy, Mom. So fucking happy. Te amo mucho, Mama. Siempre lo hare (I love you so much, Mama. I always will).”

So focused on the quiet conversation with the simple stone sitting beneath him, Javi hadn’t even heard Steve’s hurried footsteps creeping up behind him, making Javi practically jump out of his skin as Steve’s hand met his shoulder.

“Hey, buddy. You ready to-”

“Jesus, fuck Murph. You scared the fucking shit out of me.” Javi gasped, thoroughly startled as he shot to his feet, quickly trying to wipe the tears from his face as he faced his friend.

“Sorry, man, I didn’t mean to, promise!” Steve laughed, holding his hands up in defense before letting his expression shift to concern at Javi’s face. “Hey, you okay, Jav?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m- No, I’m good, sorry. Just um- Just wish my mom could have been here for this, ya know? She would have really fucking loved her.”

“Hey, it’s okay, man. My dad was gone before my wedding, too. Fuckin’ sucks.” Steve smiled sympathetically, “Truth be told Jav, that girl you’re gonna marry, I think it’s hard for anyone not to love her. Your mom would be really happy for ya.”

“Thanks, Murph.” Javi huffed, a small smile spreading across his face at Steve’s genuine sympathy, a trait he didn’t see very often.

“C’mere, buddy.” Without giving him a choice, Steve wrapped his arms around Javi, pulling him in for a hug with a few stiff pats on the back before pulling away with a nod, hands on his hips as he stared down his friend with a shit eating grin, knowing the news he was about to tell Javi would instantly turn his mood around. “Speakin’ of your future wife… You wanna see her?”

“Wait, like, now? Like, actually?” Javi’s mood instantly shifted, his entire body lighting up at the prospect, looking at Steve with relief glistening in his dark brown eyes.

“Yeah, actually. Thank God your wife is just as obsessed with you as you are with her. Jesus Christ, I think the both of ya would have fuckin’ exploded if we made you wait ‘till the ceremony.” Steve chuckled, grabbing Javi’s shoulder and giving it a playful shake. “Alright, you turn around so it’s a surprise when she gets out here, lemme go get her. And Jav?” Steve asked, turning his head back over his shoulder to look at his friend as he began to walk away back towards the house.

“Yeah, Murph?”

“You’re losin’ that bet. No way in fuckin’ hell you ain’t sobbin’ like a baby the second you lay eyes on her.”

As Steve disappeared back into the house, Javi couldn’t help but quietly laugh to himself, because as much as he wanted to dish shit back to Steve, he knew his friend was right- He was about to be a fucking mess.

“So? Are we good? Does he wanna see me?” You asked, anxiously waiting at the door, feet tapping on the floor hidden underneath your dress as you waited for Steve’s return.

“No offense, Sweetheart, but that's just about the dumbest question I've ever heard. What do you think? Of course the bastard wants to see you. I’m just gonna warn ya though, that man is a hot mess, and I really think ya just may kill him the second he sees you.” The two of you laughed to yourselves, feeling your heart beat faster and faster in your chest with every passing second, using all of your self restraint to keep from bolting out the door past Steve to see Javi. “Alright, I won’t keep ya any longer, go get ‘em, killer.”

Before you could get yourself out the door, you embraced Steve in a hug, catching him off guard for a moment before he hugged you back, smiles spread across both your faces.

“Thanks, Steve.”

“Sweetheart, you ain’t got nothin’ to thank me for. If anything, hell, I should be thankin’ you. You two lovebirds are a match made in fuckin’ heaven. I was real worried about that old bastard for a long time. Glad to know I don’t have to worry about him anymore. Well, at least too much more. Now, enough about my sorry ass, go see your husband.”

With a silent nod, you gave Steve one more quick hug before you were turning the knob to the front door, quietly stepping out to the front porch to see Javi’s back to you at the bottom of the stairs, already trying to fight the tears welling in your eyes without even seeing his face. As you closed the door behind you, Javi instantly perked up, turning his head back over his shoulder just enough to speak, but not enough to see that it was you who was walking to greet him.

“She good to come out, Murph? I’m fucking dying out here.” Javi laughed, making you giggle at the fact that he had no idea it was you who was standing behind him.

“Hate to break it to you, but unfortunately, I am not Steve. So sorry.” You snickered, practically feeling Javi’s eyes roll at your sarcastic comment, even though the both of you were thankful for a little humor to break the anxious anticipation that had been festering in your stomachs since this morning.

“God, you’re such a dork.” He laughed, his back still turned to you as you took your final steps down the stairs with your dress in hand, trying to fluff it back out as you settled yourself behind him.

“Hey, you’ve got me for the rest of your life, babe. Lucky you. I’m not gonna lie, don’t think I cleaned up half bad, ya know, if you wanna see.” You teased, giving Javi a playful poke on the back as you bit down on your bottom lip, so excited to see Javi’s reaction you truly thought your heart was going to explode out of your chest.

“Baby, you have no fucking idea. C-can I, can I see you?” Javi stammered, his voice already beginning to tremble.

“Well, I think I’m gonna implode if you don’t, so yeah.” You took one last long inhale in, holding your breath as Javi slowly began to turn to face you, feeling like everything was suddenly moving in slow motion when Javi’s eyes finally locked with yours.

Javi couldn’t even get a word out before his hands were covering his mouth, his jaw dropping open in absolute awe to see you standing behind him. The tears he swore to himself he’d try to fight back were already streaming down his face, his eyes looking you up and down over and over again, trying to soak in every ounce of you, only crying harder as he noticed each and every new detail of you standing before him.

“Osita… Oh my god. Oh my god.” Javi’s hand stayed glued over his mouth to try and keep his jaw from dropping any further than it already was, absolutely mesmerized by your beauty, barely able to get out any sort of coherent thought out of his brain. “Baby, you, oh my god, you look so beautiful. You look so fucking beautiful.”

While you figured that Javi would cry and be excited to see you, nothing could have prepared you for the reaction that you were witnessing in real time, watching your future husband become a complete, blubbering mess at the sight of you, making it damn near impossible for you to hold it together yourself, considering the fact that you were also busy trying to take in the ridiculously handsome sight of Javi in his tuxedo- his broad body filling out every inch of the black fabric perfectly, hair and mustache impeccably groomed, and sweet, teary brown eyes sparkling in the sunlight, making you melt, tears rolling down your face as your heart bursted at the seams over and over again, wondering how in the world this wasn’t all some sort of a perfect dream.

“You like it?” You managed to choke out through your happy sobs, your cheeks straining from the stupid grin that had spread across your face, the both of you radiating in the blissful glow of your excitement.

“Like it? Osita, are you fucking kidding me? Do I like it? Holy shit, baby, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. You look... Osita, you look incredible.” Javi laughed through his tears, taking another step back to grab your hand, looking you up and down again before holding your arms up to twirl you in a circle, your dress flowing around you, making you giggle as you finally finished rotating to lock eyes with Javi again. “Hermosa, I knew you were gonna look amazing, but I- I never, I never could have imagined that you were gonna look like this.”

“Coming from you? Jesus, Jav, I’m convinced you’re trying to kill me in that tux before we can even get married. You look so good. Javi?” You paused, grabbing his other hand so your fingers were intertwined, his thumb automatically tracing soft circles on your skin.

“Yeah, baby?” Javi replied, biting down on his bottom lip as he gulped, trying to hold back the lump resting in his throat from his happy tears as he stared down at you.

“Javi… We’re getting married. We’re getting fucking married.”

“Fuck. We’re getting married. Holy shit.” As if the smile on Javi’s face couldn’t get any wider, his boyish grin gleamed between his cheeks, wrapping his arms around you to engulf you in a tight hug against his chest, the two of you laughing to yourself in disbelief that you had finally made it here- that only a few short moments, the two of you got to begin the rest of your forevers together. “Can I- Can I kiss you?” He asked in a soft whisper, pulling back to tilt his head towards yours, sliding one of his hands up to gently cup your cheek, shifting your gaze up towards him.

“What kind of question is that, you dork?” You teased, bringing your mouth close enough to his to let your lips barely ghost over one anothers, butterflies swarming in a sea of excitement.

“Because I’m afraid if I start kissing you, I’m not gonna be able to stop.”

“Do your worst, Peña.”

As if time began to move in slow motion, your mouths met with an electric and tender intensity, slowly becoming a mix of tangled tongues and teeth, your hand sneaking under the opening of Javi’s suit jacket to wrap around his waist as the grip around your face began to tighten, your bodies melting together as one in a nearly magical moment- Well, as magical as it could get before being interrupted by all your friends and family that had gathered on the front porch to share in the moment with you.

“Hey! Lovebirds! Jesus Christ, save it for the ceremony!” Steve shouted, a chorus of laughter erupting behind him, startling you and Javi.

“Good Lord, Steve, give it a rest. They missed each other!” Connie sighed, shaking her head at her husband’s loud interruption.

“Yeah, that’s our sister, you pervert!” David chimed in, the familiarity of his taunting voice making you roll your eyes, putting your hands on your hips as you stared back at the crowd.

“Will you can it, you dingus? It’s their wedding day for Christ’s sake!” Your dad groaned, slapping David in the back of the head.

“Daddy, what’s a pervert?” Olivia asked, looking over at Charlie as Chucho held her against his hip, grimacing as he tried not to laugh at the exchange.

“Seriously David, really? Grow up! They’re so adorable, let your sister have this.” Your mom scolded, promptly giving him another whack to the stomach, you and Javi now laughing to each other at the scene that was unfolding in front of you on the porch.

“Well,” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge, “It seems like everyone else has been able to solve the ‘you not being able to stop kissing me’ problem.”

“Jesus Christ…” Javi sighed to himself, running his hand over his face as he stared back into the crowd watching you and him, “Can we get a few more minutes to ourselves before the ceremony? Please? I haven’t seen her all day.”

“C’mon, let’s give the two some privacy. Lindas (cuties), why don’t we go look to make sure all the flowers are ready. Maybe we can practice walking down the aisle again?” Cucho smiled at the two of you, giving Javi a subtle wink as the girls began to giggle with delight, racing off to the backyard in a fit of squeals of excitement.

“We’ll do another check of everything, too, I wanna make sure everything’s in place before the ceremony. Do you mind helping, Connie? Boys, will you go check to make sure all the food and drinks are ready for cocktail hour” Your mom asked, picking up on Chucho’s hint to give the two of you some space, now trying to rope your dad, brothers and Steve into that equation as well.

“Can I have a beer if I help?”

“Jesus Christ, David.”

Everyone's conversations began to trail as they headed their separate ways, leaving you and Javi standing in the front yard alone, once again, looking at each other with mischievous grins- Yours from knowing damn well that Javi had something up his sleeve, and Javi’s from the something stored up there.

“What’s that look for, Jav?” You smirked, crossing your arms over your chest, raising an eyebrow at Javi as you waited for him to let you in on whatever plan he had brewing in his brain.

“I think… I think that I really have to go to the bathroom.” Javi replied, boyish grin glowing between his cheeks as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest.

“And you’re really making it seem like going to the bathroom is a two person job.” You snickered, rolling your eyes at Javi, knowing exactly what he was implying. “Baby, the ceremony is gonna start in an hour, everyone’s here and I don’t think there’s gonna be enough-”

Before you could finish your thought, Javi was swallowing the rest of your sentence in a long, deep kiss, only pulling away to quietly rasp in your ear.

“Is that a challenge, Osita? I promise I’ll be fast, baby, you just look so fucking beautiful, and I don’t think I’m gonna make it if I can’t have my wife all to myself, even if it’s just for a few minutes. ”

“God, you’re such a drama queen.” You sighed with a snicker, heat creeping in your core knowing that you had just as little self control as Javi did, peeking your head to make sure that everyone had dispersed before they watched you and Javi sneak inside together. “We have to be quick, okay? I just don’t want-AH! Javi!” You squealed as Javi was scooping you off your feet mid sentence, very fittingly carrying you bridal style across the front yard and up the steps of the porch, nudging the door open with his hip, the two of you all giggles and smiles as he whisked you through the house, stopping at his childhood bedroom, promptly setting you on the ground to shut the door behind him.

With a click of the lock and a rattle of the door handle to make sure they were safe from intruders, Javi’s hands were all over you in an instant, his mouth crashing into yours as he walked you back towards the ensuite attached to his bedroom, hoisting you up onto the kitchen sink as he shut the bathroom door behind him for an extra layer of protection.

You could tell how hard Javi was trying to keep himself in check, considering the amount of time and effort that had gone into your hair and makeup, and the delicacy of your dress, but it was taking every ounce of self control he had to not rip it right off you. Softly letting his kisses trail down your body, Javi began to sink to his knees, smirking up at you with his awestruck gaze as he carefully began to lift up the layers of your dress, running his hands up and down your bare thighs.

“Do you know how fucking beautiful you are, Osita? Fuck, I can’t believe you’re gonna be my wife. My beautiful, amazing, perfect wife.” The hot breath of his words danced against your skin as Javi peppered soft kisses up the inside of your thighs, his head almost disappearing underneath your dress as he creeped closer and closer to your core, already soaked with your arousal waiting for Javi’s touch. “You’re mine forever, Hermosa. Fuck, I’m so lucky. I love you so much.”

“I-I love you too, Javi.” You whined, your breath already shaky as Javi’s fingers hooked around the waistband of your underwear, tugging them down your legs and letting them drop to the floor below you before letting his fingers glide through your folds, already glistening with your arousal.

“Fuck, you’re already so wet, baby. Can’t believe this perfect pussy is all mine forever too. God, you’re so fucking perfect. Everything about you. Mmmm, I know we don’t have a lot of time, but I have to taste you, Hermosa. Can I, baby?” Javi mewled, making you gasp as he gently slid two fingers into your aching core, curling them to bump against the spongy spot inside you that already had you fisting at the edge of the bathroom counter to try and keep your composure, and better yet, your voice down.

“Javi… Oh, shit. Fuck, Fu-ahhhhh.” You moaned, feeling the strong arch of Javi’s nose bumping against your clit, placing a soft kiss there before the flat of his tongue licked a long, broad stroke across your cunt, putting just the right amount of pressure on your sensitive bundle of nerves as his fingers worked in tandem to send the sweet tingling sensation to start building in your spine.

While Javi would have loved to take every second of his sweet time to savor in watching you fall apart on his tongue, he knew just as well as you that he was working on a limited schedule, and wanted, no, needed to make sure he could get you off at least once before his luck ran out.

Javi began to work his tongue against your clit, circling and flicking in fast and firm motions as his fingers curled deeper into your heat, his free hand hooking around your thigh and draping it over his shoulder, digging his fingertips into the meat of your flesh, like he was trying to ground himself more than you.

You could already feel the coil in your stomach beginning to tighten from the way Javi was working so relentlessly to make you come undone, drinking every ounce of you up as, his lips now latching around your sensitive bundle of nerves, making your back arch and mind go blank while that all too familiar tingle began to creep through your core, cunt beginning to clench tighter and tighter around Javi’s fingers with every movement of his mouth against you.

“That’s it, mi amor.” Javi cooed, peeking his head out from under you just enough so that his sweet, brown eyes were locked with yours, the hot words of his breath dancing against your pussy as his fingers continued to rock in and out of you. “I’ve got you, Osita. Forever. I’ve always got you. Promento (I promise).”

Before you could respond, your jaw dropped open and face scrunched in pleasure as Javi dove back in, burying his face in your cunt as each press of his tongue became more firm and precise than the last, feeling your pussy begin to flutter as you clutched tighter around the edge of the counter, trying to keep from screaming out in pleasure and raise any suspicion. But as your legs began to tremble and heart race, teetering on the brink of collapse, it was taking every ounce of willpower you had left to make that happen

“Fuck, Javi. Oh shit- Baby, I’m so close, I’m so close, I’m so cl-ooohhhhh.” You whimpered, feeling your orgasm crash through you, pleasure radiating in your veins as you fell apart, losing all inhibitions to keep yourself quiet as you threw your head back in all consuming bliss. With his fingers still buried in your cunt, gently working you through your high, Javi shot back up, his mouth engulfing yours in an electric kiss to try and capture your ragged moans that had been coating the walls of the bathroom, the tangy taste of you still lingering on his lips.

Your heartbeat finally began to slow, your chest heaving in long, heavy breaths as you slumped into Javi, your head resting on his shoulder, shuttering at the loss of Javi’s fingers inside you. He carefully pulled them out, bringing them to his mouth and sucking them clean with a devilish smirk of satisfaction on his face.

“Tastes so fucking sweet. My wife tastes so fucking sweet. Fuck, I don’t think I’ll ever get over that.” Javi chuckled with a boyish grin, gently cupping his hand under your chin as the other wrapped around your waist.

“Get over what? Calling me your wife or eating me out?” You giggled, still trying to catch your breath as you came down from your high, biting down on your lip as your arms draped over Javi’s shoulders, your fingers tracing soft circles at the nape of his neck.

“Both. Fuck, I love you so much.”

“I love you so much too, you menace.” You smiled, tilting your head back to kiss Javi again, so blissfully lost in the moment, that the two of you both about jumped out of your skin when you heard a loud knock coming from the bedroom door.

“Jav? You in here, buddy?”

“Goddamnit, Murph…”

The familiar twang of Steve’s voice made you freeze in fear, Javi quickly helping you down off the counter as he cursed to himself before the two of you were trying your best to fix yourselves up in the mirror to try and hide any signs of the horny whirlwind that had blown through the bathroom.

“Javi?” Steve called out again, continuing to knock on the door.

“Yeah, I’m here, just uh- Just give me a second, Murph.” Javi sighed, the two of you trying to keep from laughing at your current predicament, wondering how the hell Javi was going to talk you both out of this one.

“What’s the plan, Peña?” You giggled, giving Javi a playful nudge as he carefully turned the knob to the bathroom door.

“To tell Murph to fuck off if he tries to give me shit.” The two of you quietly snorted, feeling a little less guilty than you would have if it wasn’t your wedding day. “You stay here, okay? I’ll take care of him.” He smiled, pressing a soft kiss on your cheek as he opened the door.

“God, I love you.”

“I love you too, Osita.”

Closing the bathroom door behind him, Javi took a few deep breaths as he ran his hands through his hair, turning the knob to open up his bedroom door to be greeted by an unamused Steve leaning in the door frame.

“What’s up, Murph? We were just, uh-” Javi asked, trying his best to stay casual.

“I fuckin’ knew it. Don’t ‘what’s up’ me, you horny bastard.” Steve groaned, rolling his eyes at his friend. “Y’all haven’t even made it to the ceremony yet! Jesus Fuckin’ Christ. Everyone’s been lookin’ for y’all. I had a fuckin’ feeling this is what you two were up two, and as your Best Man, I’ll cover for your ass now, but I sure as shit ain’t doin’ this all night for you two rabbits. Now c’mon, Casanova, go get your wife from in there and come outside. Remember that thing y’all gotta do where you actually go get married?” Steve teased, slapping Javi in the chest before shaking his head at his friend, his cheeks pink in embarrassment as his eyes darted to the floor.

“Yeah, yeah, we’ll be out in a second.” Javi grumbled sheepishly, quietly accepting defeat.

“An actual second, ya hear? Not a horny Javier Peña second, or I swear to God.” Steve groaned, raising an eyebrow at Javi.

“Promise.”

“Alright then. Chop, chop, Mr. Peña. Let’s go get your ass married.” Steve laughed, grabbing Javi by the shoulder before giving him a little shake and disappearing back down the hallway.

Hearing Steve’s voice and footsteps fade, you slowly peeked your head out of the bathroom door to see Javi standing by himself, head buried in his hands, pinching the bridge of his nose before turning back to see your face, equally embarrassed as his.

“... He knew, didn’t he?” You grimaced, now fully opening the door and walking through to meet Javi on the other side.

“Yup.” Javi sighed, adding an extra emphasis to the “p” with a pop.

“Well… Either Steve has the world’s most unlucky timing, or he just needs to do a better job of minding his business.” The two of you snickered, crossing your arms over your chest as you stared up at Javi. “Or maybe someone needs to stop being such a bad influence.” You teased, poking Javi in the chest.

“Me? I’m the bad influence? Okay.” Javi chuckled, teasing you right back. “Sorry I’m getting married to the hottest woman alive and I can’t help myself. My gorgeous wife is one not making it any easier on me.”

“Still not technically your wife yet, you dork.”

“Close enough.”

Grabbing you by your waist, Javi pulled you flush against chest, tilting his head in for a long, tender kiss- the kind that made heat creep through your cheeks and butterflies churn in your stomach, the kind that made your heart beat a million miles a minute, the kind that seemed to make everything else in the world stand still, even if just for a moment. The kind of kiss that made you know without a single doubt that you had never been more in love than you were at this very moment.

“I love you, Javi.”

“I love you too, Osita.”

“You wanna go get married?”

“Mrs. Peña,” Javi grinned, grabbing your hand to interlock it with his, “There’s nothing I’ve ever wanted more in my fucking life.”

@cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @beware-my-thorns @missladym1981 @messinadress @milly-louise @jay-zzle @the-one-with-the-grey-color @persephone-girl @bitchesuntitled @pedropascallvr @millennial-teenybopper @nastiasnow @vee-bees-blog @hopplessilse @mxtokko @its-nebuleuse @mandoisapunk @msmorningstaarr @amyispxnk @honeyedmiller @mountainsandmayhem @picketniffler @burningnerdchild @copperhalfcent @pedr0swh0r3 @chaotic-iguana

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fishfingersandscarves · 7 months

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hello all! after 10 years of remission my dad was diagnosed with hodgekin's lymphoma for the second time in his life this august. since his diagnosis my family has been hit by every fucking roadblock and bad luck thing imaginable.

our insurance has decided to make everything we do incredibly difficult and my mom has been fighting for his proper care non-stop. our disability was denied because his work had accidentally been paying him full pay while on leave and now the state wants us to pay back 10k even though it was his company's mistake - or else no disability (we're going to petition this)

he's been suffering from symptoms from his chemotherapy such as intense body pain and deep neuropathy and a hernia (which needs to be removed by surgery but cannot while he's on chemo) alongside a slew of other problems. no amount of pain medication has been really helping and it's been really really awful.

we've been trying really hard to keep things all together but my mom is the only one working who makes enough to pay bills and it's just. really tough.

all this to say. i'd really really appreciate it if the link to this meal train was shared. and if possible someone were to donate.

thank you so so much

#talkies #link #donation #charity #cancer #my dad is in the hospital again today because he has a fever.#and thank GD he recinded his DNR...for now #its so. i have been crying so much and it sucks it sucks it sucks #anyway please share and or donate please

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a-jynx · 6 months

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buried promise (Astarion x reader)

bg3 has had me in a chokehold, specifically a certain vampiric rogue.. and i felt angsty, so i hope you enjoy !

maybe this will get me into writing after years lmao - this may be out of character, but i just needed this for my lil heart okay ;-;

angst warning tbh <3

You swore you'd find a cure. You swore to fight for him.

Yet, you forced him to promise to live if you died- he laughed when you said it, not truly believing such words from you... Why would he? You were cursed. Easily fixable... Right?

He sent for anyone - everyone - that could and would help you, but no luck came your way. The curse was progressing faster by day, he could see it. Draining the color from your skin, sucking up your warmth like a fire being snuffed out. Even, your eyes changed colors. Becoming something dull. Lifeless.

You saved the city. You helped even the most miserable low lives when you wouldn't benefit from it. And you... You helped him. Saved him. He swore to save you just like you did for him. Nights became longer as he sat rereading the books Gale had scavenged up for you. Rubbing sleep from his eyes while glancing at your sleeping figure curled up in one of your armchairs; snuggled into a cocoon of blankets to help you keep warm. You looked peaceful. No pain, just peace. Rolling his shoulders, he grabbed another book before practically stabbing his nose into the musky pages. He was going to save you.

"You promised to try, my love," he murmured into your hair, brushing it from your eyes as you curled further into your shared sheets. Cold nipped at your fingertips, biting at your blood supply as if it were your lover. "I tried, my star, but I just want to rest-"

"You've rested enough," he bit, crawling into bed behind you, wrapping his arms tightly around you. His grip shaking. "It's time for you try and get up. Move. You're letting this curse take hold and.." His voice trailed, feeling his chest ache. A tight bubble strangled his voice, quieting it. "Please." His voice was barely a whisper. "Please, try." You glanced over your shoulder to see him. His ruby eyes brimmed with tears. Turning in his hold, you pressed yourself into his chest, gripping his shirt tightly. Your shared ring catching on the fabric as you felt your own tears well up. "Aeterna Amantes," your lips pressed a careful kiss to his exposed skin. Dotting your way up his throat as you felt tears drip past your lips. "Lovers Forever."

He remembered teaching you that. That was his promise to you the day you slipped a ring on each other's finger. Now it's become your promise to. Even if you lay on Death's doorstep, your last breath would be a promise of love to him. A promise for his peace.

"Aeterna Amantes," his voice shook before he buried his head into your hair, lips fangs catching his already chewed lip. Pressing quick kisses against your crown as you allowed your own tears to caress your cheek, he bit back a bitter laugh. "I'll find something." He whispered, hiccupping back a sob. "I'll save you." Wrapped in your sheets and each other, somehow you felt more... Alive than you have in these last days. "I know you will."

Time had not been kind.

He failed. And he kept failing, and failing, and failing - everything seemed to work against him in this rush against time. This curse had sucked your very life from your bones and left you bedridden, hells, you couldn't even make it to the other side of your bed.

"There's not more we could do?" He could beg..

"I'm sorry, my friend, but we've exhausted all of our options." He could slaughter. He could give away the ring that keeps him from bursting into ashes at dawn. He should've protected them. He could've- "The best you could do now is, just be with them. Fill these last moments with peace." He was tired of peace. He wanted life.

"Right. Well, I trust you can find the door," he turned away from his friend, the one person he thought could save his lover - his darling - Had failed him. "I need to keep searching."

"Astarion, these might be their final moments and they're withering away-"

"Do you believe I haven't realized that, Gale?! I'm watching them become a husk of their former self!" He couldn't fight back the laugh, yet tears dripped down his cheeks. "I am the one who watches as they wither away in our very bed. The bed that should've been warmed by them for years to come have it not been for the wench we met! I busy myself with every book and scroll that the lands and seas could offer me! I sit beside them waiting," his lips trembled. "I sit beside my lover waiting for their breathing to stop. For their heart to quit. To take them away from me,"

"I meant no harm,"

"And yet, you suggest I sit idly by and allow my love to perish." Astarion moved upstairs, listening to the front door slam shut behind his friend. He felt his legs give from beneath him, his knees slamming into the stairs. Kneeling there, he pressed himself against the wall, gripping his white curls with shaking fingers. Tugging at the ends, he jumped at the loud thump that came from the top of the stairs. Moving quickly, he nearly fell at the sight.

You sat up from your kneeling, holding your knee as he rushed over, grabbing the blanket that rested around your shoulders as you leaned into his chest. Sweat dripped down your brow while you wheezed, trying to catch your breath. "What happened," he searched over your body for any marks. His fingertips grazed over your old battle scars and even his old love bites, the ridges seemed to chase his touch. "Why're you out of bed, my love? You should've called for me-"

"I heard you and Gale," you murmured into his shirt. His grip seemed to tighten around your waist as you curled further into him. "I know our time is coming to an end." Your breath seemed to be so hushed that even his ears could pick it up. Or, more so he didn't want to hear it.

"Godsdamnit.. Gale is a fool." He snipped, carefully maneuvering your body to fit against his own as he lifted you. You shivered against him, wincing at the movement and bitterness in his voice. "We'll find you something," he paused, pushing open your bedroom door and quickly setting you back into your silk sheet prison. You felt your heart shatter at his state. His skin seemed more transparent, his eyes a duller yet still brilliant red, and dark circles curled around his eyes as they seemed to be sunken in.

"What if there is nothing for me, my love," you sighed, caressing his cheek as he tsked, grabbing your hand and pressing gentle kisses to your tattered knuckles. "What if you're... Wasting our time?"

"Any time I have that is searching for something to help you," he paused, pressing a kiss to your wrist. "Is." Anther kiss to your shoulder. "Never." Another pressed to your neck, you shivered. "Wasted." He pressed his lips firmly against your own. Both of your lips chapped and scratchy, but he moved further into your bubble, pressing his body against your own. His hands slithered up your body, tugging you into his lap while his lips ventured down your throat. His fangs ghosted your flesh, barely leaving a mark in their wake.

You lurched away, your chest squeezed, and your lungs felt as if they were burning from the inside out. You turned away, attempting to cover your cough as Astarion laid you back against your pillow. Blood trickled past your cracked lips as he stared at you with wide eyes, reddened lips agape. "I'm, I'm sorry," you quivered over each shake, covering your mouth as more blood smeared across your chin and palm. He moved closer, ripping a piece of his shirt and pressed it against your lips, wiping away whatever blood spilled.

"Hush, just let it out, darling," His voice trailed as your coughing fit continued. More blood came and more clothes were ripped from his very back. Time had run out..

He left you to sleep, wandering outside into the crisp night air, feeling his lungs burn as he inhaled as deeply as he could. His chest tightened as his mind flickered back to your blood smeared across your lips. The gags and cries as you tried to stop, tried to swallow water to make the copper taste leave, but you said it reminded you of him. The smell and taste. Balling his fists, he moved through the forest behind your home. No clear direction in mind, just movement. Clear air. Dampened colors of the world. He stumbled as he came to a cliff. With a hiss, he stood at the edge, feeling the heightened breeze push past him as if trying to make him stumble and fall.

Fall.

Oh, he fell. He fell for you.

You were a rare gem in his eyes. Someone who could roll with the punches of life and still come out with a smile. Perhaps someone's blood smeared across your cheek, but he would happily wipe it away before pressing his lips to yours. You were his reason for freedom. Hells, you found him something to help keep his freedom amongst the world after 200 centuries of torture and forgetting who he was. But you gave him someone new. You showed him there was a way to a good life... A precious life. But now his reason is being ripped away from him. And he can't fight or kill this beast.

Astarion watched the horizon, his gaze twitching down to the two rings that cladded his fingers. His other hand moved towards it, trembling as he traced the golden bands. One glittered with rubies, a slight glow to the band itself. The other could be seen as just an ordinary ring, yet it held the most value to him. It was his promise to you. The shared rings between you. His gaze settled on the trees to his left. Moving towards it, he smiled softly as his fingers grazed the bark. Your initials carved jaggedly into it with his last name attached. Memories flooded his mind as tears washed over him once more, yet he couldn't fight back the smile gracing him. Turning around he noticed a rather large pair of rocks near the cliff, swallowing thickly he moved closer and grabbing them, plucking his dagger from its sleeve and began to carve.

Hours had passed. He found himself back in front of his - your - home. More memories danced around his mind as he walked inside, his hand grazed every surface it could reach as he moved up the stairs. His chest felt tight, yet he pressed on.

Opening the bedroom door, his gaze softened as it fell to you. Your chest barely pushed up the blankets as sweat matted your hair to your forehead. Your lips were a chapped pink, torn from your nervous chewing - possibly his fangs work as well. Your eyes fluttered as he settled onto the bed next to you, caressing your cheek as you blinked awake. "Finally coming to bed?" You tried to smile as he mirrored it, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to your temple.

"I thought we could go somewhere first.. Remember our cliff?" His voice hushed as you sighed, gently nodding. "How could I forget the most magical place of my life?" He smiled again, brushing hair from your eyes. "I would say this was the most magical," he grinned as you scoffed, quickly turning away as you coughed shaking gently.

"I'll help you, my love," he rose from your shared bed. Carefully moving his arm underneath your knees and caressing your back, your body cradled against him. The movements felt like that of a mother rocking her newborn child as he descended down your stairs, still holding you close as you sighed into his ripped and stained shirt. "You... You should wash this, my star," you murmured, feeling the scratch of your old blood stain as he tsked.

"I'll be alright, darling, you just rest..." His voice seemed softer than usual. Lucid even. You heard a door open and shut as the world around you chirped and sang with birds and insects songs. The breeze chilled your skin as you gently shook against Astarion's chest, goosebumps lining your flesh. "We're almost there, my sweet, just a bit longer, please." You nodded against his chest, sighing softly.

All movement stopped as your body met the dirt and grass, Astarion following as you leaned into the curve of his body. You smiled, moving your head to where you could see your vampiric lover. He seemed... At peace. Whole. You caressed his cheek with your trembling hand, your thumb dragging across his skin. His lips caught your thumb, pressing a soft kiss to it.

"Thank you for bringing me here." You whispered, afraid to disturb the gentleness surrounding you.

"Thank you for being with me." He whispered back, catching your lips in an almost blistering kiss. You inhaled, feeling your chest tighten and your eyes began to flutter, yet your lips still danced along with his own. Seemingly chasing his, begging for more time..

He felt his lips quiver as you slumped into his arms. Your mouth falling away from his own while your head rolled into the juncture of his shoulder and neck. Tears stained his cheeks as he held you close, shaking with gasping sobs.

You were gone. Just... Gone.

Licking his lips, he gently stood, taking your limp figure with him before moving towards the hole he had made before.. He knew your time was over when he saw the blood. The thing he once thrived to take from you, now all he could wish for was for it to return to you. Carefully placing your body into the earth, sinking to his knees as he pushed and shoved dirt over your body; more tears blurred his vision as he pushed forward, wanting to dive in after you. Once his hands were dusted in the dirt that now held your body, he glanced to the stone he had carved earlier, Y/N Ancunín. Reaching over, he plucked one of the few wildflowers and laid it on top, releasing a shaking breath.

Astarion blinked once, twice before swallowing thickly. Early sunlight peaked over the horizon now, awakening the world around him and yet... All he wanted was to rest. To sleep. Carefully standing, he moved around your grave, and pressed a kiss to your gravestone. Standing to his full height, he turned towards the cliff and watched as the sun rose over head. Feeling the warmth that caressed his cold skin, he huffed out a sigh as he walked backwards, settling into the spot next to your grave. Licking his lips, he glanced towards your sight once again as he smiled softly, closing his eyes and seeing your smiling face greeting him.

"Aeterna Amantes, my darling.. Lovers Forever. I will find you again," he paused, swallowing around his tongue as he reached towards his left hand, gently tugging off your wedding band and pushing it into the earth underneath him.

"After this life, and the next... I love you, my sweet love."

His voice fell into a sigh as he tugged off the last ring. The sunlight bit and bullied through his flesh, burning and peeling at it as he began to sparkle and crumble. His final thought of hugging you tight while pressing a firm yet loving kiss to your lips. Tugging you into his chest, while you laugh and smile into the kiss.

The sunlight ring glittering in front of your shared burial site. Your headstones he carved with a gentle caress, love, and kindness. You were lovers. Soulmates even. Beings that were crafted to fit one another and Astarion knew that... If he lost you, he would lose himself all over again. Besides... He promised you.

#bg3 x reader #astarion x reader #astarion x you #astarion #reader insert #bg3 astarion #baulders gate astarion #baulders gate 3 x reader #baulders gate 3 #astarion angst #astarion ancunin #astarion x tav #astarion romance

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toothfund · 2 months

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Peyton has been my best friend for seven years now, and for as long we’ve known each other they’ve had to deal with a multitude of dental issues. They were able to get two teeth extracted recently, but due to the cost the remaining issues have gone untreated.

Thanks to everyone's generosity we've managed to raise enough to cover the costs of the two teeth in the most urgent need of treatment! However, their other teeth are still in bad shape and cause them a lot of pain daily.

As of March 3rd we're very close to funding treatment for the second set. Being able to fund this work ASAP means we can have more work done faster, which would give them the best chance of saving all of their teeth.

Peyton has been dealing with most of these since they were still in high school. I don't want them to have to live with this burden anymore or have to give up teeth that can very much be saved! Any amount donated will put us that much closer to bringing them some relief. If you can’t donate, please consider sharing. Thank you for reading!

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ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused · 6 months

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DAY SEVENTEEN: Clothed Sex w/ Daryl Dixon

a/n: Writing this actually made me giggle because the Dad + Husband!Daryl combo in me just jumped out, so you guys get a little sprinkle of that. Also, this is Commonwealth Daryl because he's so sexy and dilfy and fatherly and I don't write about him enough.

masterlist | kinktober masterlist | AO3

TAGLIST: @alina02 @louderfortheback @minervadashwood @fandomsarelifee @theendofthe70s @nomajdetective @mgg-theprettiestboy @phoenixblack89 @murdadixon @hallecarey1 @bunnybabe-babydoll @alixwriter @dixonzzgirl @violettavirus

When it came to the apocalypse, there was little to no time to be intimate. From going scavenging to protecting your people, the free time that you'd usually have was cut short. You found it funny that it was the end of the world with no dead lines or due dates, but you still had to see if you could fit sex into your schedule.

Now with Judith and RJ in you and Daryl's care, you were almost never alone. So, when opportunities to have grown up time presented itself, you all but jump at it.

"Hurry, D. We've only got twenty minutes before we have to get the kids from school." You said breathlessly, both palms balanced on the counter top of your Commonwealth apartment.

Daryl was behind you, tugging your pants and panties down your full hips hurriedly. You balanced yourself on your forearms, your back arched and presented for your husband. Daryl wasn't in any better shape really, his thick fingers working frantically at the zipper of his black jeans.

"I can pick 'em up — fuck." He swore as he entered you. "Can you please just focus on fucking me?" You all but growled. "Yeah, yeah. Sorry, sunshine." He apologized.

He held onto your hips, his hands keeping a firm grip on you as he pulled out, almost fully slipping out of you before slamming back in harshly. His thrust sent you forward with a loud moan, your breasts almost falling out of your v-neck top at the impact.

"Deeper." You whimpered in bliss. It had been so long since Daryl had fucked you, though the stretch was a bit painful due to the lack of foreplay, you welcomed the sensation that wasn't emptiness with open arms.

"Trying'ta feel me in yer stomach?" Despite asking you, he slammed into you harder, his tip prodding at your g-spot. A loud smack resounded throughout the open floor plan. "Ah!" You yelped, your hips shooting back on their own accord and your gummy walls clenched down on him.

"God— ya feel so good, beautiful." He groaned, his already raspy voice even deeper. "You sound so sexy, D." You whined. "Ya look even sexier." Leave it up to Daryl to turn the compliment back around on you.

He leaned over your body, kissing the free space between your shoulder blades. His scruff scratched and tickled your skin, but the sensation sent shivers down your spine.

"I — fuck… I think 'm gonna cum." You breathed, rotating your head back to be able to lean into his kisses. "'M gonna make you cum real good, sweetheart, alrigh'?" He promised, his warm breath hitting the shell of your year.

"Yes." Was all you can say through excitement at his promise.

He leaned up again so he could pound into you faster and harder, pulling you closer and closer to your end. The coil in your gut threatened to snap, but it wasn't enough. It was as if Daryl could read your mind, because he stopped for a moment to lift your left leg, bending it over the counter.

You all but shouted at the position change, fully spread open on his cock so that he could reach deeper inside of you.

"Fuck, D!" You cried out, nails clawing at the hard marble. "You gonna cum, sunshine?" He asked through gritted teeth. You could feel him pulsing inside of you, his grip on your hip and the back of your knee tight enough to leave bruises.

"Cum with me." You demanded through another cry. "I will, I will."

As he delivered a few more thrusts, your walls fluttered around him, sucking him into you to hold him there selfishly as you creamed all over his dick.

You felt him pull out of you quickly as you rode out your orgasm, the man ejaculating all over the back of your shirt.

"Now—" You said through your burning lungs, "I only have five minutes to change my shirt."

#kinktober #kinktober 2023 #kinktober day seventeen #plus size reader #x plus size reader #plus size!reader #x chubby reader #chubby reader #daryl fanfiction #daryl dixon fanfiction #daryl dixon kinktober #daryl x reader #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon x plus size reader #daryl dixon smut #smut #fanfiction #nsfmeau

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jpmarvel90 · 7 months

Text

Always the Bridesmaid

Masterlist Scarlett Masterlist

Word Count: 7236

Relationship: Scarlett x ReaderPugh

Summary: Y/n and Scarlett have become close friends since they met whilst Y/n was working as her little sister's manager. Y/n has feelings for Scarlett but has firmly been friendzoned and has to watch on as Scarlett makes her way through endless men and women.

Y/n's POV:

I've known Scarlett for the last 4 years. I meet her through my little sister Florence, and we've been great friends since. After doing my business degree, I became Florence's manager. We didn't know if it would work, but Flo wanted someone that she could trust, and she knew that I would always do what was best for her.

It's ended up working out really well and we've got a great working relationship that doesn't affect our personal one. It was through Black Widow that I first met Scarlett and we hit it off really quickly and became best friends. Flo would always laugh, saying that if she couldn't find me on set, she would just need to look for Scarlett and we'd be together.

Spending so much time with Scar led to inevitable feelings to develop. She's naturally flirty and I forget that sometimes. Unfortunately, that just made the feelings grow quicker. Flo worked it out pretty early on and always tried to convince me to tell her. But just as I would work up the courage, she would be with someone else.

Scarlett is openly bi, so there was never a worry about her not liking women, but it seemed that it just meant there were more people for her to end up with. It never got in the press, but Scar liked to sleep around. If she wasn't in a relationship, she was having one night stands with people on nights out or after movie premieres. Something I had a front row seat too which made my heart ache.

The closer friends we became, the more times I was invited to be her plus one. Though I was never the person that was lucky enough to go home with her. 9 times out of ten, I would be making my own way home as Scarlett would have her driver take her and that night's conquest to her place.

Thankfully, Flo and I are in LA for a few weeks, meaning that I get a break from seeing Scarlett. Which actually is a double edged sword. I love spending time with her. Our friendship is one of the most important ones that I have. But it also is becoming quite painful to be around her. She's recently out of a relationship, which means her one night stands are increasing in number. So this time with my sister on a rare break has been nice.

"What are you thinking about?" Flo asks me from her sun lounger. We're currently sat by her pool. When we're in LA, I live with Flo. I have my own place in New York, but not being on the same money as Flo, means owning multiple properties isn't an option. But Flo is a great sister and instantly offered for me to live with her when we were both in LA. There's only two years between us and we get on really well. We're not just sisters, we're best friends.

"Not much, just what I need to get sorted for Dune. When we're back in New York, I need to finalise the contracts with the team." I respond, earning an eye roll from Flo. "You're always in work mood. Relax a little." She huffs, adjusting in her lounger to turn and look at me. "Besides, I was sure you were thinking of Scarlett, you always have the same look when you do." She teases me, poking at my cheek. I hit her hand away. "I do not!" I glare at her.

"You do! It's a mix between complete adoration and pain. You're like a brooding teen from a teen drama." She insists. "I do not brood." I bite back. "I still think you should tell her." She shares, turning to lie on her back, closing her eyes. "We've talked about this. She seems quite happy with the lifestyle she has at the moment." I respond and she nods in agreement. "She has taken this latest breakup harder than usual." She observes.

"I think what I actually need is to find someone for myself. Maybe you could help?" I admit, causing Flo to shoot up in her seat. "Really?" She asks, lifting her sunglasses onto her head. "Yeah, desperate times and all that." I joke. "Oh, I actually have the perfect person. I should set you up with Hailee." She thinks excitedly. I roll my eyes as she starts excitedly rambling. I might end up regretting this. "She's in Europe for a month but when she's back I'll talk to her." Flo eventually comes to a decision, and I agree, knowing that it'll be easier.

Flo and I have a nice few weeks off in LA, It was good to get some sun and relax, although she's right. I do struggle in switching off from work, so I did spend some time making sure everything was in order for her.

Our time in LA was ending with us attending the Antman and Wasp premiere. Flo was attending with Charlie whilst I had the pleasure of attending with Scarlett. She had asked me not long after her break up as she was meant to go with Colin. She didn't want to go alone and basically begged me to go with her. And me being a sucker for her puppy dog sad eyes, I agreed.

As she was just attending the premiere there was a lot less faff than there can be when it's a movie she's in. When I attended the Marriage Story premiere with her, we were getting ready hours before and being briefed so much by her team. I much prefer it like this. She'll pick me up and I can just hang back whilst she gets her picture taken and does a couple of interviews. The rest of the time we'll be together and get to enjoy the movie.

"Wow. Y/n, you're looking beautiful." Scarlett greets me as I make sure the house is locked up. I spin around and see her resting against the side of the car in the most incredible black suit. Her cleavage is on show, and it hugs her in all the right places. I gulp seeing her looking incredible. "I think you need to look in a mirror. You look sensational Scar." I tell her as I approach the car. "Thanks babe." She smiles at me, wrapping her arms around me. There goes my fluttering heart.

"Let's get going, shall we?" She asks, holding the door open for me. "Thank you, Johansson." I smirk at her, giving her a wink and letting my hand run along her bare arm. I'm sure I see her shudder under my touch. She's frozen a little, before she shakes her head and gets in the car the other side. "I missed you." She says, turning to pout at me. "I was only gone for three weeks." I laugh at her childlike face. "Three weeks too long without my bestie." She sighs. That causes a pang in my heart when I remember that's all she sees me as. Her friend.

"Seems like you had plenty of company to distract you." I point out, causing her to drop her gaze. "Yeah, I took the breakup a little harder than I thought and let myself go a little too far. I'm ready to focus on me for a bit." She says a little embarrassed. Feeling guilty for pointing it out, I reach over and take her hand. "It's ok to be hurt. You just need to find a healthy way to vent." I reassure her, giving her a warm smile when she finally looks up to me.

"What would I do without you Y/n?" She asks, a sadness in her eyes. "Suffer endlessly no doubt." I tease, making her laugh. "You're right there. You better not leave me." She lightly threatens. "Unfortunately, I think you're stuck with me." I chuckle. She lifts my hand to her lips and presses a kiss to my knuckles. "Good." She smiles.

The premiere goes well, and I really enjoy the movie. I'm a huge Marvel geek so I understand how lucky I am to get to see the movie at the world premiere. I watched on as Scarlett did everything she needed to. People were used to seeing me with her. Our friendship was well documented, but they knew it was a friendship and nothing more, so we didn't get inundated with rumours.

We make our way to the after party and we have a great time dancing and drinking. Flo and Charlie are in a world of their own and I smile seeing my sister so happy. Scarlett is quick to drag me to the dance floor and her hands find my hips, swaying us to the music. Her touches are extremely flirty as she dances close to me, her body pressed into mine.

After some time dancing, I feel a tap on my shoulder. "We're heading home" Flo tells me, as Charlie has his arms wrapped around her, placing kisses to her neck. "Stop." She laughs, playfully pushing him away. "Have fun. I'll see if I can crash at Scarlett's" I tell her, knowing it's the first time she's seen Charlie in a few weeks. "Thanks. I love you Y/n/n. Stay safe." She tells me, pulling me into a tight hug. "You too. Safe sex is good sex!" I shout after them, earning a middle finger from Flo.

I hear Scarlett laughing next to me. "You two have a great relationship." She observes and I nod. "Yeah, I'm pretty lucky she's my little sister." I smile. "I'm going to run to the loo and grab some more drinks. Do you want one?" I ask and she nods. "Please, I'll have whatever you're having." She responds. I nod and leave her to continue dancing whilst I make my way to the loo.

There's quite the queue at both the bathroom and the bar. But I eventually manage to grab us both a cosmo and turn around to rejoin Scarlett. I look around the dance floor and my heart drops when I see her lip locked with a red headed woman. I don't know why I'm surprised. This happens more often than not.

When she pulls away for air, she notices me, and I plaster on a fake smile. "Y/n/n! You're back. This is..." She greets me with a big smile, turning to the woman. "Kacey." The redhead introduces herself to me. "Oh, thanks for these. You're ok getting another right?" She asks, taking the drinks from my hand and passing one to Kacey. "Uh yeah. No worries." I respond, turning back to the bar knowing I've lost any attention from her for the rest of the night.

I go to the bar and order a shot of vodka, that I down pretty quickly, and then grab a beer. I don't know why I let this get to me so much. I know this is what she's like. I need to just move one. Hopefully when Hailee is back in the US something might go right for me.

"Y/n!" I hear my name being shouted. I turn around and see Scarlett with her lipstick smudged and a big smile on her face. Her hand tightly grasped around Kacey's. "We're heading home. You ok to getting back on your own?" She asks me with a drunk glaze to her eyes. "Yeah sure." I respond, downing the rest of my beer and leaving before anything else can be said. I'm done with this.

I head outside and order an uber before finding a hotel nearby that has a vacancy. Luckily there is one not too far away, though my bank balance isn't going to thank me! Whilst I'm waiting for my cab, I see Scarlett drag Kacey into the back of her car, laughing the whole time.

That night in the hotel, I started to re-evaluate my life. I need to either move on from this stupid crush or remove myself from the situation. It's a hard decision as I love my friendship with Scarlett, and I don't think that I want to lose that. But in my current state, I don't think I can keep seeing her like this. I come to the decision that I'm going to take a bit of time away from her. I can use work as an excuse and hopefully get the chance to meet Hailee and see where things go.

I have a difficult night and only manage to get a couple of hours sleep. But I don't rush home, wanting Flo to be able to have the most time with Charlie. I don't have to check out until 11, so I spend it chilling in the room. Not having a phone charger, my phone died during the night, and I sigh. I only have the dress I was wearing last night. I call down to reception and ask if they can book me a cab to take me home. I just want to wash the night off me.

Reception calls when the cab is here, and I make my way down as quickly as possible to avoid the stares I'm bound to get when I walk out with smudged makeup and a crinkled dress. I slip into the back of the cab and rest my head back against the headrest as the car rocks along the road.

When I pull up at Flo's I thank the driver and head to the front door. But before I can open it, it swings open, and a body collides with mine. "Y/n/n. Where the hell have you been?" I teary Flo asks me. "I thought you knew I wasn't coming home last night so you and Charlie could have the place to yourself." I reply, unsure why she's so upset. "Yeah, you said you'd crash at Scarlett's. I tried calling you to see if you wanted to join us for breakfast, but it went straight to voicemail. Then when I called Scarlett, she said that you didn't go home with her." She starts to panic again so I pull her into me. "Sorry. I stayed in a hotel last night and my phone died." I explain. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you." I tell her, guilt filling me. I should have messaged her last night to let her know.

"That's ok. I was just so worried when I couldn't get a hold of you. I thought something might have happened to you." She says a bit more calmly this time. She hugs me tightly again and we turn to head inside, but the harsh breaking of a car catches our attention. "Y/n! Thank God you're ok!" Scarlett says as she rushes out of the car, launching herself at me.

"When Flo called and said you hadn't come home and weren't answering your phone, I was so worried about you." She rambles out and I find it hard not to scoff. She had no concern about me getting home safely last night. "I'm fine." I respond a little too harshly and I see Flo raise an eyebrow at me. "Are you ok? Where were you?" She asks, taking my hands. The touch is making me uncomfortable, so I gently pull them away. "I stayed in a hotel. I had already agreed that Flo could have the house with Charlie as they hadn't seen each other in ages." I inform her. "Why didn't you tell me? You could have stayed with me." She says but I once again fight to hide the scoff.

"I was going to, but you were a bit distracted." I point out. "Oh." Scarlett says when the realisation hits. "Look, I'd really like to shower and get some sleep. I'm heading in now." I say, not wanting to be in this situation any longer. "Of course, Y/n/n. I'll make you some breakfast, you must be hungry." Flo smiles, sensing the tension. "I'll see you later Y/n/n." Scarlett calls after. I turn and give her a tight lipped smile as I continue to walk backwards. I see hurt flash across her face. But I brush it off, heading upstairs.

Once I'm showered and in some comfy clothes. I climb into bed, hoping to hide away for the day, but I don't get my wish as Flo appears at my door with a tray in her hands. She walks in and places the plate of fried goods in front of me. "You looked like you could do with something greasy!" She smiles, taking her seat next to me. "Thank Flossy." I smile, tucking in straight away.

"She did it again. Didn't she?" Flo asks giving me a sympathetic look. "Yeah, but it's not like it's a surprise." I reply, trying to play it down. "Seems odd after how she was talking about focusing on herself and taking a break from all that." She shares aloud. I just hum in response. "It's her life. She can do as she pleases Flo." I remind her. "But that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt you." She comforts me. "You're right. But today is the last time I'm going to let it affect me. I'm ready to move on from this. In fact, I was thinking that maybe I could stay here whilst you go back to New York. I can still work from here but it just gives me a bit of time to sort my head out." I suggest, hoping she agrees.

I watch her face to see what she's thinking. But I can't quite get a read on it. "Sure. Hailee will be back by then anyway so some time for you to get to know each other." She smiles, making me let out a sigh of relief.

We spend the rest of the day hanging out together with Charlie. They'll be flying out tomorrow to New York, so it's nice to have some time together before we're apart for a few weeks. Scarlett texts me a couple of times and I respond to be nice.

Scarly: So when do you get to New York? We should head for dinner to celebrate being reunited.

Y/n/n: I'm actually not flying back with Flo. I'm staying for some last minute work in LA for a few more weeks.

Scarly: Wait what? You didn't mention anything last night. We were meant to be reunited to take New York by storm.

Y/n: You were a little distracted last night. I'm sure you'll be fine until I get there next month.

My response is a little short and I feel bad. But I don't think I can keep up with the charade anymore. She's not too happy that I didn't tell her, but eventually stops complaining about it. She makes me promise to have a bestie weekend when I get home and I reluctantly agree. Hopefully by then, I'll be in a better place and can be a good friend to her without being hung up on her.

__________

The first few days in LA on my own were weird. I had always been around Flo and having this time working with her but from the other side of the country, is strange. But I soon get into a routine and start to focus on myself a bit more. I start going to the gym and eating better. I'm really starting to feel good about myself and the more days that pass the less I'm thinking of Scarlett.

Flo contacted me after being away for a week to inform me that Hailee is back in LA and would like to meet up. She shares my number with her, and I end up getting a text from her 5 minutes after hanging up from Flo. She works fast!

Over the next few weeks, I spend a lot of time with Hailee. She is so sweet and hilariously funny. I really enjoy spending time with her, and we've gone on some interesting dates. Flo is super excited as she gets the gossip from both sides and is even more excited when I tell her that Hailee will be coming to New York for a few weeks for work, so we arrange to all go out together.

Whilst Hailee and I are having lunch together at a local Italian, she looks up to me a little nervously. "Everything ok?" I ask her and she nods. "Yeah. I um. Just have a question for you." She stutters a little. I nod encouragingly, smiling to show her I'm listening. "Kevin Feige is setting up this charity gala in New York. There are loads of the cast from different Marvel movies attending. I was wondering if you would like to be my date?" She asks me through a wave of confidence.

"I would love to." I respond a little too quickly, but Hailee doesn't seem to care as her eyes go wide. "Really?!" She asks and I nod. "Yeah. I'd be stupid to say no to getting to turn up with a beautiful lady on my arm." I flirt, making her blush. "Amazing, I'll get my team to sort it all out." She says excitedly, reaching out to take my hand.

After extending my stay in LA for another week, I finally return to New York. I've kept in contact with Scarlett whilst I've been away, but she's been busy, helping me in creating the needed distance. I definitely feel like I'm in a better position to see her again. Although Hailee and I are only friends at the moment, she's brought a new happiness to my life and even if she's just a new friend, she's helped me more than she knows.

I'm only home for about 4 hours when there's a knock at my door. I know it's not Flo as she's out of town for a couple of days. But I'm also not surprised when I see Scarlett smiling excitedly, a bottle of wine in her hand. She instantly pulls me into a tight hug. "Thank God your home. You're never allowed to be gone for so long again." She tells me firmly, letting herself into my apartment, making her way into the kitchen and grabbing two glasses.

We spend the evening catching up and I can see how far I've come. Looking at Scarlett, I know there are some feelings still under the surface, but I know I'm on my way to getting over her. I actually enjoy myself, seeing that our friendship is intact and I hope that it continues that way.

"So, Y/n/n I was hoping you'd be my plus one for a charity Gala next week. I wanted to ask you earlier, but I also wanted to ask you face to face." She tells me with a smile, but it drops when she sees my frown. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm actually already going with someone else." I tell her. "Oh, is Charlie not able to go with Flo?" She asks but I shake my head. "I'm actually going with Hailee." I tell her and I'm sure I see pain flash across her face.

"Steinfeld?" She asks and I nod. "Yeah, we've been getting to know each other in LA." I tell her. She gulps a little and forces a smile on her face. "Are you dating?" She questions. "Not really. Well, maybe kind of. We've just been spending time together. Flo introduced us." I explain. "Hmm. I'll be talking with her." She mumbles. I don't think she realises that she says that out loud, but I let it slide. "Well, at least I'll get to see you there." She says, forcing that fake smile again.

The rest of the night feels a little awkward. Is she unhappy that I'm unable to go with her. I mean, I'm only ever there for her until she finds the person that she wants to head home with. At least this time, I'll be with someone that wants me there with them entirely.

___________

The night of the gala comes around quickly. Hailee and I get ready together at my apartment as she doesn't have a property in New York. It's quite relaxed, even though there are about 10 strangers in my home, getting us, all made up for the night.

We meet with Flo and Charlie to go into the gala together. Hailee holds her arm out to me and I link with her. "Shall we." She smiles, scrunching up her nose at me. "After you Miss Steinfeld." I return. We take our time taking photos along the red carpet. It's strange being in the photos like this. Normally, I stand back as Scarlett has her photos taken. But Hailee has her arm tightly around me, only letting me go when her manager insists she needs solo photos.

As we reach the end of the carpet, I hear Scarlett's name being called and turn to see her walking down the red carpet on her own. She's killing it and the crowd are eating it up to see her going solo. I smile, seeing her doing so well, but turn back to Hailee, giving her my full attention.

When we get into the hall, we find our table and I see that Scarlett is sat next to me. Also on our table are Flo, Lizzie and Seb. As I'm pulling out Hailee's chair for her, I hear the familiar raspy voice from beside me. "Always the gentlewoman is Y/n." She smiles.

I turn and give her a hug in greeting. "You look lovely Scarlett." I tell her and she returns the compliment. "Have you met Hailee before?" I ask. "Very briefly, but it's lovely to see you again." She says, leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

Dinner is actually really fun. There is live music through the night, an auction and a couple of speeches to talk about the cause they're supporting. We're having a good time on our table and the drinks are flowing. I notice that Scarlett is looking fiercely at Hailee and I. But each time I make eye contact, she smiles and lets the façade drop.

The last musical act of the night is Niall Horan. He's great but I see that Hailee becomes more uncomfortable. Then I remember that they broke up not too long ago. I lean into her and place my arm around her shoulder. "Are you ok?" I ask quietly and she nods. "Yeah. Just haven't seen him in a while." She admits. "Do you want a drink?" I ask and she nods. "Yeah, let's go." She smiles, taking my hand and leading me off to the bar. I can feel Scarlett's eyes on me as we walk away but I ignore it. Focusing on Hailee in this moment.

Whilst we're at the bar, I hear an Irish accent and Hailee freezes. She looks at me and I smile, taking an exaggerated breath which she copies. She then turns around and greets Niall. "This is Y/n." She introduces me after they have a short hug. "Pleasure to meet you." He smiles, holding his hand out to me. I take it and smile in return. "You too."

There is an awkward silence and I suddenly feel like I'm the odd one out. "Could we uh. Maybe talk?" Niall asks and Hailee stutters at the request, turning to look at me. "Go on, I'll take our drinks to the table." I tell her and she smiles gratefully. "Thanks Y/n." She replies, placing a kiss to my cheek and following Niall.

I return to the table and Flo looks at me with a confused look. "Where's Hailee?" She asks. "Uh. Niall wanted to talk to her." I inform her and she looks shocked. "Oh." Is all she says. "Yeah. Oh." I say back. There are clearly feelings still between them and I'm expecting the inevitable to happen.

"Where are the others?" I ask, not lingering on the subject of Hailee. "On the dance floor." She replies, pointing in their direction. Lizzie and Seb are dancing like idiots whilst Scarlett is dancing with a man I don't recognise. Probably her conquest for the night.

"Shall we join them?" She asks and I nod, downing my drink, wanting to dance with my sister. We join the others and Scarlett's eyes flick to me and then around us. I'm not sure what she's looking for, but whatever it is, makes her leave the arms of the mystery man to join us in a group dance.

I let myself go, not dwelling on the disaster that is my love life. In this moment, I'm having a great time dancing with everyone. It's nice actually having this time with Scarlett too. She's giving far more attention than she normally does. I wonder if Flo has told her the whole Hailee thing and she's feeling sorry for me.

My happiness doesn't last for long though when I feel a tap on my shoulder. I see Hailee with a guilty look on her face. She nods her head to the side of the dance floor, and I follow her. Feeling Flo and Scarlett's gaze on us. "I'm really sorry." Hailee rushes out but I stop her. "It's ok. You still have feelings for him." I answer for her. "H-how did you know?" She asks shocked. "I could see it. It's quite obvious." I chuckle. "Oh. I didn't mean for this to happen. I really do like you." She says but I can tell it's conflicted.

"It's really ok. We aren't together. It was nice being able to spend time with you." I reassure her, but it doesn't stop tears falling down her cheeks. "Why are you being so kind?" She asks. "There's nothing to be angry about. As long as you're happy, that's what matters." I respond, and she pulls me into a tight hug. "I'd love to still be friends with you. You've really brought some light to my life." She says, almost with a pleading look. "Friends it is." I smile, holding my hand out jokingly. She takes it and shakes it laughing. "Now go find your man." I instruct her.

She looks at me once more, almost like she's checking that I'm ok. When she sees what she's looking for, she turns around and I watch as she makes her way to Niall. Not feeling like staying around anymore, I head to find Flo, who's with Charlie on the dance floor.

When I reach her, she looks at me with a sympathetic look. "Well?" She asks, although I'm sure she already knows. "It seems like I'm never destined to be more than friends." I chuckle coldly. "Oh Y/n/n. You deserve so much more." She wraps her arms around me and holds me tight. "Maybe one day. But right now. I think I want to head home." I say and she nods. "Of course. We can come take you." She offers but I shake my head.

"No. Stay you're having fun. I can just grab a cab. I'll text you when I'm home" I reassure her. "Ok. If, you're sure. Please be careful." She says, placing a kiss to my cheek. I say goodbye to Charlie and Lizzie and ask Flo to tell Scarlett that I've headed home. Assuming that she's off with that guy from earlier.

Scarlett's POV:

Seeing Y/n hand in hand with Hailee was a pain I did not enjoy feeling. The jealousy built up within me, but I forced a fake smile on my face. When she told me she was going to be her plus one, it broke my heart. I love going to events like this with Y/n. She's so much fun and I feel like I can be completely myself around her.

I had developed feelings for her about a year ago, but I knew she was off limits being Flo's sister. Though seeing her tonight, I think I need a conversation with Flo. I don't think I can see Y/n date someone else. It would break me.

When she and Flo joined us on the dance floor, I looked around to see where Hailee was, but I couldn't see her which was odd. What I did notice was the change in demeanour from Y/n. I know her like the back of my hand, and I can tell when her feelings change. Has Hailee hurt her? If she has, I'm going to be having words.

When Hailee returns, I glare at her and watch intently as Y/n follows her off the dance floor. "Easy there you might kill her with that glare." Flo laughs at me. "You know, if you like her, you should just tell her. Stop fucking around with randoms and get your act together for her." She calls me out and I look at her shocked. "Come on, your feelings for her are pretty obvious. No matter how many people you sleep with, it won't change that. But you should know, you're going to lose her if you don't sort it out." Flo warns me.

"I uh. That's not what's going on. Besides, she's your sister." I try to defend weekly, and she just laughs loudly. "That doesn't bother me. As long as you're both happy that's all that matters. But I'm telling you now, if you decide to go there, you better not hurt her anymore. I won't take seeing her sad." She threatens lightly. "Wait, what do you mean anymore?" I question, which makes Flo's eyes go wide.

"Flo?" I question lowly but she just looks around her for an escape, which comes in the guise of Charlie, who she quickly pulls into her for a heated kiss. "Ok, wow. No need to eat his face. I don't need to see this." I say with a scrunched up face. I turn and make my way to the bathroom.

I splash some water on my face and try to psych myself up. "Come on Johansson. Just bite the bullet and tell her how you feel." I give myself a pep talk, looking at myself in the mirror. I need to do this before it's too late and her and Hailee are together.

With a wave of confidence, I make my way out of the bathroom on the hunt for Y/n. I catch the back of her and see her leaving. I run towards Flo in a panic. "Where's she going?" I ask her, worried I'm about to miss my opportunity. "She's heading home" Flo replies, a sad look on her face as she watches after her sister. "What about Hailee?" I ask but she simply points towards the bar where she's in the arms of Niall.

It makes my blood boil to know she's hurt her. It takes all of me to not head over there and give her a piece of my mind for hurting my best friend. "If you're quick, you might be able to catch her." Flo smirks at me. I don't think, instead, I rush off in pursuit of Y/n.

When I get outside, I see her propped against the wall, clearly waiting for a taxi. I take a deep breath and slowly walk over to her, resting on the wall next to her. "I'm sorry." I say, not really sure how to approach the situation. "It's ok. I'm used to leaving these sorts of things on my own." She chuckles dryly. "What's that supposed to mean?" I ask her. She's normally at these things with me.

"Oh, come on Scar. I'm normally getting a taxi after you've headed back home with whoever you've decided you want to sleep with that night." She responds with a bite to her tone. "Come on, that's not fair." I defend but she rolls her eyes. "When was the last time we left something like this together?" She asks me. My mouth just opens and closes as I try to find the answer, but it doesn't come to me.

"There's my cab, I better go." She says whilst I'm still lost in my head. But before she can walk away, I grab her arm and pull her into me. I don't even think, and I press my lips against hers. It takes her by shock and takes a moment before she starts to kiss me back. Her lips are soft, and I feel fireworks ignite in my stomach. But as she starts to sink into the kiss, she suddenly pulls away.

"NO!" She shouts as she pushes me away. "What?" I ask her shocked at her response. Oh God, have I totally misread this situation? I was sure she had feelings in return. "I will not be another notch on your bed post." She yells at me, her hands rising to her hair. "God, every time we come to these, I have to see you leave with some random person who you inevitably kick out and never see again. I force myself to come with you under the hope that maybe one day you might see that I'm here, right in front of you, and can give you what you've been looking for. But instead, I torture myself each time." She rants, angry at both me and herself.

She starts to pace, and I step in front of her to stop her. "Please stop pacing and listen to me." I try to get her attention. But she tries to walk around me towards the taxi. I manage to stop her and wave the taxi off, much to Y/n's annoyance. "Scarlett, that was my ride home." She exhales whilst glaring at me.

"Just stop and let me talk and I'll make sure you get home. Please." I practically beg her. She looks at me and sighs, nodding, indicating for me to go ahead. "You're right. I've been an ass, bringing you along and ditching you when I find someone to leave with. But you have to understand I only did that because I am madly in love with you and thought that you were out of reach." I admit.

She looks at me in complete shock. "No. This is some sort of joke." She tries to deny it, but I grip her arms a little tighter. "I didn't think that Flo would allow me to date you. So, I pushed my feelings down and tried to forget about you. But I never could." I share, embarrassed to admit that I chose to cope in this way.

"When I broke up with Colin, it hit me hard, not because I wasn't with him anymore. But because it became more obvious that I wasn't going to be able to avoid my feelings for you. So, I did what I do best and slept around so I could at least numb that feeling for a while." Tears start to build in my eyes as I admit my deepest feelings for Y/n.

I know that this is my only chance with her. I may miss any chance of being with her and may even ruin our friendship. I look at her, hoping to see any response or get an understanding for how she's feeling. But for the first time in a long time, I can't. Everything I've learnt about her, is wasted in this moment. "I was selfish. I didn't want to lose our friendship. Instead of being truthful, I dragged you along, pretending that I didn't know the pain it was causing you." I confess, ashamed of it.

"Please, just know that I do truly love you. I would do anything to have a chance to prove that to you. I don't think I can live this life without you in it. Please just tell me I have a chance." I plead, taking her hand in mine. She doesn't pull it away which gives me some comfort. "Scarlett, I don't know. I've tried so hard to move on from you." She says, pain lacing her voice. "That's why you stayed in LA?" I finally realise and she nods.

"It hurt when you would flirt with me and treat me like I was the only person in the room, to just ditch me at the first sign of someone else." She shares her feelings, and I can see how much damage I've caused. "I am so sorry that I made you feel like that. I wish I had just had the confidence to admit my feelings in the first place. I could have saved us both a lot of pain." I sigh.

"Y/n, please let me try to make this up to you. Even if it's just as friends. As much as that will hurt." I plead, hoping she'll give me a chance. She looks at me, her eyes darting between my own. She lets out a long sigh and shakes her head. "I'm going to regret this." She mumbles to herself, before lifting her head to look at me. "Ok, but we need to go slow. I want to know that you're 100% in this." She responds, making my heart sore.

"Of course, Y/n. I will do everything in my power to show you my true intention. We'll go at your pace, and I will make sure that I have clear communication with you. Thank you for giving me a chance. I won't waste it." I thank her, taking her other hand in mine, my smile growing with happy tears falling. "Can I start by taking you on a date?" I ask her nervously. "I'd like that." She responds shyly, which makes my heart flutter. She's so cute.

"Perfect, I'll pick you up at 7 tomorrow. Wear something comfy. I'm going to pamper you." I tell her through a big smile. "Someone's eager." She chuckles. "I've wasted too much time. I'm not wasting anymore." I tell her, our gaze locking on each other. I want nothing more than to kiss her, but I know I need to take this slow and do this right. Hopefully if the date tomorrow goes well, I'll get to kiss her then.

"Come on, I'll take you home." I tell her, directing her towards my driver. I hold the door open for her and she slides in. When I get in next to her, I take her hand in mine. The ride to her apartment is silent, but it's not awkward.

When we pull up outside her building, I get out to walk her to her door. "Thank you for giving me another chance Y/n. I promise I'll make this up to you." I thank her, feeling a relief that hopefully we're on the right track now. "Don't mess this up Johansson." She smiles at me, opening her door. "Oh, trust me. I don't plan to." I smirk, waving to her as she goes to shut the door. "See you tomorrow." She smiles, lingering for a moment. "See you tomorrow, Pugh." I grin, walking back towards the elevator.

As soon as the door shuts, my whole body relaxes. I can't believe she agreed. The smile is plastered on my face, with no plans on leaving anytime soon. As I make my way home, I think of how I can give her the perfect date. I want it to be everything that she deserves. Because I know that Y/n is it for me. There is no one else in this world that I want to spend the rest of my life with. I just need to prove that to her and this date will be the first step to doing that.

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