#why not make it canon in a silly fic?

[owl-with-a-pen]

Winn had been in the future for way too long, how else could he forget just how heavy Kara’s infamous game nights could be? Add Lena and Alex to the equation as the worst enablers in history and he was certain he’d have a wicked hangover come morning.

But, hey, this was a party, and he was only back in the twenty-first century for a couple of days. So, consequences be damned, he was going to make every second count.  

At least, that’s what Drunk Winn thought. Future Winn, well, he might have had some choice words to say on the matter.

Good thing he was living in the present.

Winn was in no way close to being the worst offender of the night, he could thank his very human alcohol tolerance for that. That being said, games requiring strategy - or even general dexterity - were well beyond anyone’s ability right about now. So, they’d all taken to the floor of Kara’s apartment - some in better states than others.

Lena was the only one who had kept the high ground up on the sofa, wine glass deftly balanced between three fingers as she curled snugly into her chosen corner.

Down on the ground with the common folk, the couples had predictably coupled together. Kelly was lazing across Alex’s lap, resting her head against the cushions that weren’t currently being occupied by Lena’s legs. On the other side of the coffee table, Nia and Brainy sat arm to arm, an impressive hoard of snacks littered around them.

It was in that blissfully intoxicated state that Kelly had proposed the terrible idea of playing a game far less taxing to the ol' thinker: truth or dare.

Winn had expected outrage, a cacophony of booing, at least one person begging they switch to Netflix instead of trialling more party games – especially of the high school variety.

What he hadn’t expected was to find himself lured into an impromptu circle not ten seconds later, an empty beer bottle poised at the centre like a deadly snake ready to snap. Kelly had been immensely pleased with herself.

Guess Alex was rubbing off on her, now Winn had three enablers he had to worry about.

Thirty minutes and half a solo cup of questionable liquid later and so far, so good, Winn had yet to divulge any timeline altering secrets to the party. He had a pretty airtight plan to avoid that, in actual fact. It was a simple execution: he just avoided 'truth' at all costs.

Oh, the things he’d done already for those damned dares. He still wasn’t sure where his left shoe was. Or his Legion ring.

Another Future Winn problem. For right now, none of that mattered, especially when it was his turn to spin again. Winn couldn’t say his spin had been very eloquent; the bottle travelled impressively slow, a hollow warble echoing from the empty glass until, eventually, the bottle’s neck came teetering to a halt in front of one unsuspecting Coluan.

The second the bottle stopped, Brainy peered down at it as though its very presence had personally offended him. Winn smothered a snort with his hand. He’d been lucky to avoid the bottle’s judgement so far, but even a twelfth level intellect’s luck ran out eventually.

Unable to contain his glee any longer, Winn grinned broadly. “Well, well, well, Querl Dox,” he announced, slapping his free hand against his knee, “we haven’t heard much from you tonight. So, what’ll it be, buddy? Truth or dare?” He pointed to Brainy with an overgenerous hand, slopping the contents of his cup across his wrist in the process.

“Winn!” Alex scolded.

Winn rolled his eyes. “Alright, alright!” he said, making a show of putting the cup down. He wasn’t surprised when Alex thrust him a handful of paper towels to clean up his mess.

While Winn mopped up his sleeve and a good portion of the floor, Brainy sat with rigid posture as he pensively observed his options. His eyes flittered towards the ground, then back up again. Once or twice, he caught Nia’s gaze, who smiled at him encouragingly, brushing her hand across his knee. Her superhero name had never been more deceiving – it looked like Dreamer was the brightest eyed of the bunch by miles. The only close contender was Brainy, although it wasn’t a particularly high bar overall. With the alien grade alcohol sat between them, Winn knew for a fact that neither one of them was particularly sober.

Eventually, Brainy narrowed his eyes, lifting his head. “Very well,” he said, puffing out his chest as though he’d just volunteered himself for a suicide mission. “I choose truth.”

Winn’s eyes widened in surprise. Well damn, maybe he had.

He’d sort of expected Brainy to pick dare like just about every other superhero sat around the circle. The only outlier was Lena, who had promptly bowed out of the game before it had even started, electing to act as umpire from her perch on the sofa.

Winn drummed his fingers together beneath his chin. It was rare that he was ever given the opportunity to ask Brainy something that – barring certain prohibited topics – he’d answer honestly and without hesitation. Whatever he asked still had to match the vibes of the game, of course. In which case, he knew he had to play this safe.

“What to ask the smartest person in the room,” Winn wondered aloud, mostly to buy some time. The truth was, there wasn’t much he could ask that was game-night appropriate – otherwise, he wouldn’t get a fun answer. And he really wanted a fun answer.

Which only left, well, the most generic of all high school truth or dare questions.

A devious smile spread along Winn’s face. He could make that work.

“I’ve got it,” he declared, leaning in as though he was the one about to divulge a secret. “So, Querl, tell us, who was your first kiss?”

Everyone loudly oooo’d at that. Everyone except for Nia, who grinned mischievously into her cup. “This is gonna be good,” she muttered, taking a sip.

Brainy, however, looked vaguely wounded at the question posed. Picking up on his discomfort, Nia ditched her cup and took her boyfriend’s hand instead, squeezing his fingers reassuringly.

“Is it too late to change my answer?” Brainy asked.

“Absolutely,” Alex and Kelly said together.

“No take-backs, those are the rules,” Lena reminded him with a wink.

“You’re not even playing!” Kara objected.

“C’mon,” Nia said, bumping Brainy’s shoulder. “You told me, it won’t break the timeline.”

Winn eyed her suspiciously, but Nia only shrugged, offering him a not-so innocent look that very much read wait and see.

Fortunately, they didn’t have to wait for very long. Nia’s guiding touch seemed to be the final element required to sway him, and with an awkward shuffle so that he could gain closer access to the circle, Brainy lowered his voice to them all. “So long as it does not leave this room,” he told his friends with critical seriousness. “Can I count on you to uphold that?”

“Jeez, Brainy, now you have to tell us,” Alex said. “We promise.”

A volley of promises followed Alex’s, and although Winn could confidently say that no one here was sober enough to be believably reliable, it seemed Brainy was just drunk enough to trust in their honesty anyway.

“Very well,” he said, leaning in a little further. Collectively, everyone else did the same. Alex even removed a very disgruntled Kelly from her lap just so she could get a better angle on the action.

Winn scooped up his drink, coddling it close to his chest in anticipation.

Brainy took a deep breath, keeping his eyes trained to the centre of the circle. “The first kiss I ever had was with… Kal-El.”

The reaction was instantaneous.

Kara spat her drink straight back into her glass. Winn damn-near choked on his. He coughed, only to jerk when Alex clapped him so hard on the back that he felt his teeth rattle inside his head.

Up on the sofa, Lena stared on with a coy look of approval.

“Kal-El?” Winn repeated, his voice barely a squeak. When Brainy didn’t even try to elaborate, Winn cleared his throat viciously enough to burn. “Tell me you are not talking about the Kal-El… as-as in Clark Kent, Kara’s cousin, literal Superman?”

“Told you this was gonna be good,” Nia said.

Winn turned to her incredulously. “And you knew about this?”

Nia smirked. “No secrets, remember?” She tapped her cup with Brainy’s whose green skin was quickly beginning to darken into an awkward blush.

Winn shook his head, paused, then drained the last of his drink in one solid gulp. The fire in his lungs at least cleared some of the static in his brain. Or made it worse. At this point, it was hard to tell. “Woo boy,” he gasped out, “first off, I am jea-lous. Second, I have questions.”

“Truth or dare only permits one question per round,” Brainy cautioned, his voice tight.

“Screw that, I want the juicy details!”

“Seconded,” Lena said swiftly.

“Thirded.” Alex tipped her glass towards Brainy.

“Traitor!” Kara cried, shoving her sister playfully on the shoulder.

Alex scoffed, “What? He’s not my cousin!”

“Let’s call this part 1b of a multi-layered question, ‘kay?” Winn said, scootching forward. He’d practically thrown himself into the centre of the circle by now. “How was it? Was it more than once? Oh my god, when did this even happen?”

“A long time ago,” Brainy said, somewhat gravely. “We were both teenagers at the time, Kal—Clark, visited the future on several occasions when he was still learning to utilise his powers. He trained with us, for a time. And… we grew close.”

“So wait, you guys were actually an item? How has no one in the Legion ever mentioned this to me?”

“It didn’t last long,” Brainy said quickly. He lowered his gaze, raising his shoulder in a half shrug. “It couldn’t. Clark belonged in the twenty-first century to ensure the present day of the thirty-first.”

Nia bit her lip. When it was clear Brainy was done explaining, she cleared her throat. “Also… for our present to exist, a lot of Clark’s time in the future had to be erased from his memory.”

Kara’s face fell suddenly. “Oh, Brainy…”

Unperturbed, Winn raised an eyebrow. “So how far did it go? Are we talking just kissing or did you find out how hard the Man of Steel really is?”

“Oh Rao,” Kara groaned, throwing herself onto her feet. “That’s it, I’m going out to get more snacks.”

“It’s nearly two in the morning,” Alex said, frowning down at her watch as though this was news to her, too.

“Not in Paris it isn’t,” Kara announced with forced cheer. “At least from there, I won’t be able to hear any more of this conversation.”

“Can I get a croissant?” Winn asked, batting his eyelashes.

“Croissants aren’t for traitors,” Kara said, ruffling his hair. She patted Brainy’s shoulder as she crossed to the door, offering him a gentle smile before she sped out of the room.

In the awkward silence that followed, Kelly cleared her throat, looking over to Nia with a wince. “Sorry, is this whole thing weird for you, too?”

Nia laughed abruptly, shaking her head. “What? No way, I literally asked the exact same questions when he first told me. Believe me, you’re gonna have to try a lot harder before I start hearing anything new.”

“Well in that case,” Winn said, turning his grin back on Brainy. “What was Supes like in the sheets?”

Brainy only offered a strained smile in response, leaning helplessly towards Nia. “It appears we have opened a can of worms,” he muttered.

Nia wound her arm around his back sympathetically. “Only answer what you want,” she said, resting her head against his shoulder. “I’ll put them all to sleep if they get too nosy.”

“Uh, you know we can hear you, right?” Winn said.

Nia raised her free hand in warning, vibrant springs of dream energy already coiling around her fingers. “You know that was a threat, right?”

Winn lifted his hands in surrender. “Okay, okay, well received. But seriously, Brainy, what was it like dating Superman?”

Brainy rolled his eyes, reaching for the nearest bottle and taking a lengthy swig from it.

Winn’s grin widened. It looked like things really were about to get juicy.

Thank God they had the rest of the night. Something told him this was going to be a long story.

And it would require an even longer recovery.

#supergirl #brainysupes #brainia #brainiac 5 #nia nal #kara zor el #winn schott jr #alex danvers #lena luthor #kelly olsen #clark kent #my writing #you have no idea how long this dialogue has been in my drafts for. i actually lost it and then had to rewrite it. #it's silly. it's fun. it's silly fun. i was just in a brainysupes sorta mood #why not make it canon in a silly fic? #you can't stop me #and yes i just added some angst factor with the memory wipe what do you take me for #ya'll know the drill by now

[rogersstevie]

i'm fine with fic having steve be unenthusiastic about double dates but i kinda hate them always having his dates be flat out rude and uninterested in even talking to him like just because we saw one date in catfa we're just gonna have every woman he interacts with not even be polite to him?

#i mean i still think it's silly to be like ah he's short and skinny no one looks at him like that except perhaps bucky #depending on the fic and whether feelings exist pre war or not #but like to straight up be like ya every woman is an asshole to him it's just kinda like....... #okay so fic writers will make up women to treat steve badly #but it's not allowed to acknowledge ways in which peggy canonically treated him badly like OKAY #why does she get to be the Perfect Woman who saw him and loved him for him (which isn't true she might've liked him #but she interacted with pre-serum steve like three times?) and every other woman is evil and shallow #also as if bucky would just continuously subject him to anyone who couldn't see how great he is like come on

[that-was-anticlimactic]

how about... and hear me out... we stop reducing cole ninjago’s personality to food?

#literally so sick of it like it isn't even funny anymore #and this is at the fandom more than the show right now #like first of all - cole Clearly had an eating disorder and while that probably wasn't intentional on the writers' parts... #i mean. cole Literally started binge eating after watching his friend explode. come on. he was Never like that before s4. #and like he is Clearly at least a little insecure about it but no let's make jokes about how cole eats all the time hahaha #like the amount of times i have clicked out of fics or refused to reblog art solely because all the ninja are doing their thing and then oh #look there's cole eating cake hahaha so silly not like he's a ninja or anything :D #do better #it just infuriates me Especially since it is CANON that cole stress eats (because making fun of stress eating is so funny... show / fandom) #and he's my favorite character and it sucks to see him constantly portrayed as this food obsessed ninja who has no depth aside #from the 'there's not gonna be cake?' throwaway joke from s2 that Clearly only became a reoccuring thing because the fandom flipped out and #became obsessed with it like Yes it was funny but my God y'all have taken it to an entirely different level and the show bounced off of that #not to say that no one should ever draw or write or mention cole with food but if all you draw him with is food or if he's doing something #with food every time you write for him then you should Prolly take a step back and ask yourself why you're doing that and how you're #portraying cole as a character because he CERTAINLY has more depth than 'i love cake and also junk food tehehe protecc' #this has been in my drafts for a month and i just saw something along these lines on insta so i’m angry and posting it lol #ninjago #cole brookstone #cole ninjago

[caguaydreams]

JOTAHAN FANWORKS IS A03???

I DONT KNOW HOW TO USE THE WEBSITE SO LIKEE-

CAN U LINK SOME OF THEM

A fellow Jotahan enjoyer is DESPERATE for the crumbs. The time has come, I shall unveil my true nature in order to lend you a hand. We'll survive this together, Anon!

Ohhh boy, where to even begin. I know the bewildering absolute lack of fanart out there and my comment about crumbs might sound discouraging, and could make it seem like a worse situation than it actually is. But do not fret! AO3 got ur back! (I must apologise in advance for rambling, but honestly many of these fics are amazing and I owe their writers my life. Feel free to scroll down to the bit where I put the links to fics, lists, and authors that sometimes carry this ship on their backs).

I'm gonna list a bunch that I've recently been bookmarking in the website, as part of my months long personal crusade to read every single Jotahan work up there, and I'm kinda halfway through now I think, so I've got the stuff. Currently, there's a total of 393 Jotahan fics on the Archive, not all of them are the best quality, naturally, but that's okay, because the good fics are— and I'm gonna stress this out— The. Shit. Some Jotahan writers are wonderful masters of their craft, to the point you'll most likely eventually forget that, canonically, Rohan and Jotaro barely even exhange a few words in the first place! There is utterly delightful, suuuch delectable material here; fics that made the ship for me and elevated it from lol funny crackship to one of my top tier favorite romances/relationships of all time, in all of media, period.

You'd think, initially, that authors have to do some crazy acrobatics to settle on how they'd go about fulfilling the task of feeding dying starving suckers like me; how they'd go about making a relationship between these characters believable and feasible. But! surprisingly, there have come to be actual tropes in Jotahan narratives, stemming from how oddly natural their dynamic flows when you just give it some thought. My brain decided to conclude one day, that this is sorta like stepping into different possibilities of how Rohan and Jotaro would hit it up, because some fics can be quite similar in their approaches, but nonetheless distinctive and remarkable all the same. These characters can work SO well together, for better or worse, that there's no questioning it anymore for me. You'll understand, or maybe not (maybe you already do) but regardless I think you'll have fun checking these out!

So without further ado, and before I go on an errand of an essay about how this ship deserves more love and attention than it gets, I'm gonna drop the links. I know AO3 can look messy or be intimidating for people who are not familiar with the interface, but the first thing that will come in handy is knowing about pairing tags: your typical character/character tag that is often the first one you see following the title of a fic. If its got the characters of your preference, click on it, and you'll be sent to all the works in the Archive that feature that tag . You can start browsing for goodies from there! here's the tag to the huge assortment of fics starring the couple of mildly disfunctional adults that we want to see together.

And here is a lil bit of my latest (on-going) effort to build up a personal list of favorites and must-reads:

Underneath Perfection by Shorktooth ; I'm gonna be biased, because this one right here is my absolute. favorite. Nothing comes close. I'm even getting a little emotional by barely thinking about it. Actually, not entirely sure, but it was the fic that first sold me on this pairing when I wanted to give it a chance. Get-together fic, fairly long but definitely worth it. Not tedious, very fun, lots of variety, lots of incredibly sweet moments, it's a good deal all around. Of course there are little details here and there that keep it from being perfect, but they're minor and insignificant when viewing the whole picture. Much respect for how the author handles these characters, the progression of events, the story's pacing, and overall how organic everything feels; how natural. There are a bunch of scenes that have been embedded in my mind for months, and bits of dialogue I even reference and feel are strongly akin to what Jotaro or Rohan would actually say, even if this is fanwork. Okay, okay, I'll stop here because I'm saving my final thoughts for when I finish reading this story; Stone Ocean's animated adaptation must reach its end first. This fic follows Rohan and Jotaro across parts 4 to 6 of JJBA, so if anyone's avoiding spoilers they might have to be wary of those, skip this fic, or put it on hold like I did. Can't wait for part 6 to be over so I can get back to this work lmao. Its ending will probably crush me and be painful as hell but I don't care

How Soon Is Now? by Morioh-Cho-Radio (crimsonherbarium) ; Listen, one cannot talk about Jotahan fanfiction without mentioning "How Soon Is Now?". Underneath Perfection is my personal favorite no questions asked, but this series??? this is a must-read. Mandatory almost. Fuck, I haven't even gotten past the first three or four works in this collection but I tell you it's amazing (forever saving the rest for when I have the time to sit down and immerse myself into it because it is that special). It's got 10 single chapter stories in total, varying in lenght. Crimsonherbarium is one of those authors that manage to rightfully appropiate these characters and what they're about; nothing feels out of place, and the writing is just *chef kiss* it is thoroughly polished and hooks me in instantly, every single time. This fanfic even has its own playlist! and the songs selection, both for it and the fic titles, I think is fitting as hell for Jotahan, what else can I say?? read this series. go go go!!! have a feast!!

oh i know (it goes on, it gets old) by theultimateburrito ; Oh man... this one is something else. Is its own thing, I believe. Single chapter, kind of a long read, but you'll be enthralled. Feels like a novel, and it's not ncesarily out there, romantically speaking. The words I'm looking for to describe it are subtlety, and patience. It's a very unique short story that features comfortable company, familiarity, introspection, Rohan being his insatiably curious self, and one intriguing mystery that sounds straight out of Araki's work. I won't spoil it, but there's a particular place that I didn't even know existed irl until I read this fic and that on itself is maddeningly funny to me.

Now, some improvised picks of mine, done in speedreading fashion, because I've read too many works by now and can't actually think of what to put in here (keeping this list relatively brief and simple was more difficult than I thought). A list consisting of short stories to pick up on the go, separated by the general feeling I get from them:

Short and sweet:

Art Kids by anarchaick ; mild parallels made between Rohan and Noriaki, as well as Jotakak mentions are quite common. How these affect the mood of the story or the nature of Rohan and Jotaro's relationship is up to the fic, but in this one that is simply heartwarming

old recipe, new need by bishounen_curious ; this one's a sickfic, and it encapsulates some aspects of their dynamic SO well. I love this ficlet. It's all in the details, and the Domesticity

Ecotone by kujo (curricle) ; please read this one. That's it just read it. It is plain, bitesized perfection

the loneliest whale by pinkdarkboy ; wholesome, cute, and works as a comfort story

Short and steamy (not necesarily explicit):

Falling In Love by Kinda sad this one's by an orphan account :') regardless, it is a great read

Short and angsty/bittersweet:

It Is What It Is by illmoure ; .... sigh. Conflicting feelings about this one, but because it is an incredible work expertly written to achieve that purpose. Also, last Jotahan fic (yet...?) by one of the BEST writers for this ship. I'll later just drop a link to them directly

Save the speeches, flowers are for funerals by Morioh-Cho-Radio (crimsonherbarium) ; Hanahaki disease, I eat that shit up. It is the perfect combination of angst and romantic yearning, and as it is to be expected from this fic's writer here, this is another banger.

Short and funny:

useless questions by bishounen_curious ; weed shenanigans. It's pretty humorous, but that isn't mutually exclusive with tenderness, or physical intimacy. Therefore, I was torn between putting this one under the Short And Steamy category, but the first half is fairly hilarious on its own right so, yeah.

the death of kishibe rohan (1999, colorized) by oredatte ; Rohan being ridiculous, give it a read if you're looking for pure absurdity. Just satire here, and a bit of second-hand embarrasment

Short AU ficlets that are really nice:

A Sort of Homecoming by Morioh-Cho-Radio (crimsonherbarium) ; Japanese folklore inspired, in which Rohan is a yokai inhabiting a long abandoned place that belongs to Jotaro's family. I JUST noticed the fic was temporarily removed, but I read it long ago and still remember how beautiful it was. Actually, anything written by Morioh-Cho-Radio is absolute gold. ... pssst, you can still find this story via the Wayback Machine, but you didn't hear it from me—

Beyond the Sea by illmoure ; Mermay fic :) Marine Biologist Kujo Jotaro has a fascinating encounter. This one's just straight up lovely and refreshing

tears of heliades by pinkdarkboy ; inspired by the tale of Pygmalion and Galatea from Greek mythology

I was planning on listing authors who deserve way more than a honorable mention, but the post was getting too long, and I simply find it hard to rush a selection like that. Maybe some other time? Although, definitely do check out some of the writers whose work has already been featured above!

Oof.... Being honest, there are many more titles I wish I could just gather in one place but I haven't had the time yet. This pairing has provided me with an endless amount of comfort, besides being mostly a what-if scenario, but it quickly turned just as important to me as the source material it came from. Fanfiction can feel just as valid and impactful as media published by conventional means, and I'll think about these stories from here on out, long after I found them. I'll think of these characters, and the silly little made up reality in my head where they're genuinely happy, finding comfort and a safe space with each other, growing and developing with time, and it'll make me smile like a total fool. I really don't mind that in the slightest 🎶

#jotahan #lmao why can't I be normal about anything ever #should put up an additional warning that makes it known what one faces against when they ask me anything remotely related to my interests #Welcome to rarepair hell my dudes #should also be technical about the matter at hand and say that Jotahan is more of a crackship than a rarepair #although honestly at this point I consider them canon.... Listen— #—there's nothing in there that contradicts this pairing so I'm choosing to die on this silly hill of my own concoction #sigh... there were a couple of truly amazing fics I couldn't find nor their creators so I'm assuming they're lost media now. Ah well #at least I got to enjoy them at some point <3 #shutupcaguay #I feel the need to make actual fanart for this ship but something is holding me back. That something being my own anxious self dammit #must figure out how to manage my time better #longpost #just in case

[plushiehamuko]

i think the tragedy of p3 is what makes it such a good frickin game (possibly the best game that i've ever played) but that does not stop me from actively ignoring it when it's not convenient. like ummmm everyone is perfectly fine post-canon, we have experienced 0 irreversible losses or tragedies (except jin and takaya they spontaneously exploded, yeah sorry, unpreventable accident.)

#squishy talks too much #squishy plays p3p #LIKE YES THE TRAGEDY IS WHY THE STORY IS GOOD #BUT I AM GONNA MAKE SITUATIONS THAT REQUIRE IT TO BE IGNORED #you guys can have your angst post-canon dealing with the emotional consequences fics #and i see the value and quality of storytelling in all of these i REALLY do #but i'm just a silly guy i can't stomach alla that #i like my yippeeeee yippeeeeee!!!! everyone is perfectly ok and closer than ever silliness

[honorary-fool]

I think that analysis post I rbed Really put things into perspective for how some kin memories of mine fit together. 'Cus Holy Fucking Shit dude.

it's funny 'cus my canon's Arlecchino fuckin sucked. But I do like her as a character (and I have that cat plush of her too which makes it all the funnier).

But through the lenses of That 4.1 scene being intentionally planned as like a test of the dynamics Father and myself/my siblings had... Ough yeah.

I think that grudge against Wriothesley for the whole thing finally vanished, realizing this now..

anyways Wriothesley & Neuvillette are cool as shit, and Neuvillette's a cooler dad than 'Father' ever was, *suck it Arlecchino-* /lh

#og posts #fictionkin #also if you see a kinfession abt this later & elsewhere no you didnt /j #also side note / rhetorical thing why the shart have i had so many lyney shifts recently Gods Fucking Damn /silly /nm #like it feels like every day / every other day i add a lil something to the notion page w/ things that remind me of my canon oh my gosh #...i also Really should finish reading the fic series where my canon likely comes from / where I got the memory of the Iudex adopting us #1/3 read and two more to go- the next one's me-centric too which is fun #...that being said im still scared for 4.6 bc i've heard arly's kit is really good but i also want me. L #...i should make another sideblog justto put this shit shouldnt i

[savrenim]

gods nov 5th is the gift that keeps giving

#I recently have been dragged into I guess sort of the boku no hero academia fandom in the funniest of ways #which is to say I read a crossover fic went 'huh that's good' and decided to read more fic while also deciding to never watch the show #which I've only done for one fandom before and tbh it might legit be a more fun fanfiction reading experience than the normal one #it is WILD trying to reverse-engineer what is simply well-accepted fan theory and what is actual canon #I've definitely gotten a few guesses wrong but the osmosis process is really fun #(esp bc if you want to be a good detective you have to check dates; even people writing very carefully close to canon #might have written a fic before canon came out) #BUT ANYWAYS I guess I read BNHA fic now it's actually pretty good #probably bc there are multiple characters that fit my standard..... not even 'blorbo' preferences #my 'you have a backstory and/or situation that means fanfic written about you is most likely going to hit the spot' preferences #1 defs being Eraserhead bc let's be real 'I am a very tired gruff teacher working two jobs at once who does not get any sleep and has #against my own will adopted all of you why is this happening to me I'm so tired' is The Most Relatable #Hawks bc Crafted Into A Weapon From Childhood is The Weapons Feels^TM #and then Dabi bc that was the crossover that I read that was fun ok it was a silly jjk crossover of 'what if Gojo is reincarnated as Dabi' #that just transferred all my 'HELLO FAVORITE CHARACTER' emotions onto Dabi who then I go and look up and has also the sort of backstory #that makes him fave character material #SO here I am sitting here just generally happy with all of this watching my annual Nov 5th meme compilation #and LO AND BEHOLD there is strong arm 'trending during the us election: destiel/ BNHA' meme #and I'm going 'what the fuuuuuuuck my new favorite fandom aLSO TRENDED IN THE NOV 5TH CHAOS????' #so obviously I had to look up why #WELL THE WHY WAS DABI BACKSTORY REVEAL #anyways my housemate had to check on me as to why I was screaming and it turns out that indeed nov 5th #is the gift that keeps on giving #if you have read this far down in my tags I feel like you now know uncomfortably personal things about me #esp if you know enough about BNHA to understand all of that #so if you have any fic recs About My Favs I'm taking them I esp enjoy canon retellings bc it's REALLY fun to try to figure out #which bits of those are actually canon

[ultfreakme]

You must be in a tumblr bubble because how have you never seen posts with thousands notes claiming most classical literature is actually fanfiction of bible and the rest is of mythology. Like, this isn’t a hot take on tumblr, unfortunately.

Probably because I have a life outside of tumblr and curate my experience, but yes, I have seen posts about how Paradise Lost is just Bible fanfic and Dante's Inferno is self-insert fanfiction, but mostly from people who watch OSPD videos and say it as a joke. It's a major simplification of about a dozen concepts but okay, if you look at it from the point of definitions, yeah, Paradise Lost & the Divine Comedy are technically fanfiction; they are based on pre-existing work, with Dante there's irl people in scenarios they've never been in, etc etc.

Although I have never seen anyone saying any particular fanfic is a literary masterpiece that must simply be taught in academic settings, which is what that OP's post was actually implying.

And here's the thing; I think fanfic has the potential to be considered a classic. Because, what makes let's say, the Divine Comedy so important? It's not because it's old, but because it struck a nerve among the masses, it did things against the societal structure no one dared to do before, it transformed the Italian language as we know it, it's this carefully, excruciatingly crafted work in terms of sentence structure and is primarily a theological exploration. Now this stands out also because the og canon content, the Bible, is MASSIVE in influence. That thing STILL shapes social norms, conventions and expectations.

No current fanfiction now will ever come to be seen as a true classic unless the canon thing the fic is based on reaches Bible levels of influence on society, which is going to take centuries. Same can be applied to Greek Myths in general(also in both these cases the canon thing is also tied to social structure and religion which large portions of the world follow). We don't want to equate the term 'fanfiction' to that stuff because it feels like it's beyond that but technically, yeah. It's fanfiction.

But the term fanfiction itself is extremely recent, it was said first in 1939 and therefore carries temporal contexts and definitions. It's why it feels juvenile and uncomfortable assigning such a new, and initially frowned-upon term to classics. Being angry about what is and what isn't fanfiction depends entirely upon how you view the term 'fanfiction'.

For me, it is value-neutral and doesn't immediately denote lowered quality these days because at the most fundamental level, fanfiction is literary work based on pre-existing media. But if you add the current cultural context in which fanfiction is primarily written, ie., posted online by anyone and everyone with a desire to write, mostly to fulfill shipping fantasies or certain character scenarios canon didn't provide, then I can see why people would consider giving the label of fanfiction to the classics an insult or "shooting too high".

Maybe 'fanfiction' isn't fitting because of all the social stigma around it, maybe it doesn't apply because it feels like trying to apply modern story beats and terms to ancient mythology. What specifically, is making someone uncomfortable about the term 'fanfiction' on the classics? What the hell even is "fanfiction" in the first place because you could argue that The Song of Achilles is canon-compliant POV change fanfiction but its advertised as a retelling. Pride & Prejudice & Zombies also counts for fic. I think there's a good discussion to be had on what makes "fanfiction" as we know it now what it is because even I think assigning the term to Divine Comedy or Paradise Lost feels wrong. Maybe it's about intent? The classics are written with the need for social change or to make people see things different; art for life's sake. But most fic these days are purely art for art's sake- it is peak self-indulgence and self-expression.

I'm looking it up and people keep narrowing the definition of "fanfiction" as like

Amateur writing

Based on copyrighted characters

Without permission from og creator

Now that whole "copyright" concept complicates things because Romeo & Juliet? Not originally by Shakespeare. Dude borrowed characters from a different play, pretty sure he changed Juliette's name, and he wrote it when the og was only recently made. The concept of "copyright" and "author permission" is also VERY recent. What even counts as actually "amateur" because Van Gogh is considered a pro now but when he was alive he only sold one painting apparently so back then he could've been classified as "amateur"?

I have fully derailed. I forgot what I wanted to say-- Okay yeah I'm aware people say the classics are fanfiction, and in a way, yeah, it is, depending on how the individual defines "fanfiction".

#fanfiction #food for thought i guess #i'm sleep-deprived and in the middle of exams but this made think about what makes a classic and what's the definition of fanfiction #maybe there will be a fic someday that changes the world #but the problem is; fic is confined to fandom culture and thus people outside of it won't take it seriously #even if the thing is precise in ripping apart current governmental structure in whichever place they're from #because 'ah it's just some silly fandom thing' #fanfiction isn't taken seriously because the media its based on isn't often taken seriously #people got mad about paradise lost because up until then NO ONE DID WHAT MILTION DID BEFORE- if i'm remembering right- writing in modern- #english where the story wasn't a hero's quest was just not a thing and stuff written that way wasn't taken seriously #it rankled people because ppl held the Bible as something divine and paradise lost flipped the script on everything society largely believe #why would anyone take a fic based on Supernatural seriously when SPN itself is not respected? #same goes for even good media like LOTR Song of Ice and Fire etc #yeah they're huge but not in the way the Bible or Greek mythology are #unless there comes a canon work with anywhere close to social influence as the Bible- no fic will be held up as a classic #hello anon did you expect whatever this fucking mess is when you asked?

[stickers-on-a-laptop]

curious to see what y'all consider your funniest or best ao3 custom tags

#in the tags #reblog game #ao3 #ao3 tags #mine are: #I am aware I am mean and evil for this #if you came in here for sexy sexy times this isn't the fic for you #clueless hexagon is clueless #unbetaed we use our half a brain cell like rokkaku #the man needs some flaws dammit #we take what we like from canon and don't worry about the rest here #character study via dumb decisions and sex #<< that one's my all time fave #ramblings of a confused gay character #when silly ideas become a full fic #princess carries because princess carries superior #we are making connections that aren't there because why not #two well meaning but clueless people having a conversation #kissing as in please shut up #whatever you call 'i don't like him i just like messing with him WAIT WHEN DID I FALL IN LOVE' #discovering feelings and being like noooooooooooooooo about it #i'd say i'm not mad just disappointed but that would be a lie so here we go girls because we deserve it #sorry for being annoying it's my birthday #had this thought and was like 'yeah okay that's fic worthy' #the power of friendship and gayness combine #Violence Besties Being Violent

[devotedlystrangewizard]

me: haha im downloading destiny 2 again for lightfall

the destiny 2 fic thats still at like. february 2022. in terms of story progression. that i havent updated because i dont know enough about the story of the past few seasons to properly write them in:

#I HAD A PLOTLINE PLANNED #WHERE THE SCORN WOULD GET MORE AFFECTED BY THE DARKNESS & ALL #BUT I HAVENT BEEN PAYING ATTENTION #i think i might just watch the cutscenes of the past few seasons on youtube #bc i dont think?? i have the season passes?? for the past few seasons???? #& then wait out lightfall before planning out that storyline #i havent seen any story trailers or whatever so im completely in the dark lmao #hopefully lightfall will motivate me enough to work on tsbesg again i miss patch #i never meant for tsbesg to be completely canon compliant but i do want to follow the main story. just with the scorn present #they are my sillies #ill figure it out #i still have to write a chapter of them joining on the uh. the missions. back in the season that launched with witch queen #(was it risen i cant remember) #i have to write at LEAST one chapter of them just dicking around fighting lightbearer hive i think they would like that #why would patch have to kill ghosts when they have several friends who do it for fun. hm. #its kinda funny bc when i started the fic i ran out of material #i had to bullshit so much just for the seasons to catch up #ESPECIALLY during hunt #if i ever end up rewriting the earlier chapters one key thing is that i have to fix the timeline with the whole osiris thing #actually make everything line up more yk? #but yeah in the period between when i started (december... 2020? 2021?) and witch queen i started getting a little off track #my investment in destiny kinda dwindled once id finished witch queen #i was still really into the characters (yes i saw the cutscene of orisis waking up yes i cried) but the game itself just #and maybe it was my depression. honestly #like i started meds nearly 3 months AFTER wq #who knows. who the fuck knows. i NEED the fuckigngnfu leviathan scenes. i NEED patch to get to the leviathan i need crow to #reconcile with the scorn through his arc in that season (plot spoilers? eh. plot ideas) #im gonna go reread the most recent few chapters i need the refresher on where i stopped #ALSO. ALSO. worst case scenario i skip some less plot relevant more self indulgent scenes (like with the hive ghosts) #and put those in separate oneshots. 'takes place between chapter so & so'

[bittersweetresilience]

i've been thinking about beyond ascension again, since i've been rereading. like most of the other things i posted more than a year ago, thinking about it is incredibly embarrassing. but objectively i know i'm happy with it. posting things just has a way of making them seem cringe. anyway i still find it funny that i watched this terrible show, became irremediably gripped by these terrible villains, wrote this entire thing, and completely totally forgot temutai existed. sorry. that guy can just stay unredeemed.

#tong fo being a bartender is also #a set in stone headcanon of mine #the kind with no canon reference but that you simply know by divine vision to be true #and it was really important to me that at the end of the story he leave the valley of peace and not return #because that is not po's responsibility #and po deserves a space to heal and not have to be reminded anymore of these things #i have a lot of thoughts about this fic it's one of the longest things i've ever written in one go #which isn't much compared to other authors but for me it was a big thing #and i think it's cute how similar some of it ended up being to the fourth movie #which is probably a reason why i liked it so much i was like #yes yes yes yes this is it for me #OH making this post just reminded me of ANOTHER extremely dark fic i wrote about a cartoon panda #this one unpublished but one of my favorite things i'd ever written #braces episode from we bare bears you will forever be famous and hysterically inspiring to me #the thought of other people seeing this makes me cringe horribly but i'm trying to build immunity #fun fact for the fun fact lovers my whole ao3 account was me trying to build immunity #that's why the first few fics were once a year evenly i was doing my best to rid myself of shame and it NEVER worked i was literally #equally as embarrassed and terrified for months afterward every single time #but we stay silly and continue gently pushing our boundaries for self growth opportunities #now i think i just write certain things with posting in mind which makes it easier than feeling like i'm exposing things #that weren't supposed to be seen #that's all thank you for listening to random thoughts from sunny at four in the morning #🌃 #i would give this the fandom tag but i don't want random people to witness me

[jinjeriffic]

DPxDC and OOC

I've had a couple of posts cross my dash recently where people lament that a lot of the dpxdc fandom writes characters very OOC and how we're proliferating these characterizations among each other. I figured I'd add my own two cents.

I think the fundamental discrepancy comes from trying to reconcile two canons with vastly different tones.

Danny Phantom is a comedy superhero show operating on cartoon logic. Why do ghost experts Jack and Maddie never realize their own kid is a ghost? Why is the status quo restored at the end of every episode? Why does Danny shoot an ectoblast out of his butt that one time? Because it's funny. It's cartoony action fun where the plot is resolved in 22 minutes, there's never any lasting consequences and it's aimed at kids.

DC meanwhile wants to be taken Seriously. Heroes get beaten within an inch of their life, traumatized, killed and even the good guys do messed up things (often to each other). Yes there's action and puns, but also horrific violence, actions have consequences and it's (mostly) aimed at adults. When a main character dies the comics show their family and friends mourning and things are very dramatic. Even though at this point we, the audience can pretty much expect every death to be undone within 2-5 years of publishing, but I digress.

So how do we, the fanfic/fanart creators reconcile these differences when we make our crossovers? We either make DP more serious and somber, or we make DC more comedic.

Suddenly we have a DP verse where the Fentons' bumbling obliviousness is elevated to serious neglect or outright abuse. The GiW are no longer a minor annoyance, they are a serious threat with genocidal plans and a desire to vivisect the protagonist. When actions have consequences, we imagine Danny as dealing with serious PTSD from having to be a solo superhero and witnessing his family's death that one time (and maybe also getting vivisected). Danny is not just a teen superhero, he's now the Ghost King with serious responsibility on his shoulders.

On the flipside, if we make DC more comedic we tend to exaggerate character traits for comedic effect, focus more on the interpersonal dynamics (especially the Batfam) and have the characters act more casual and silly. Suddenly the Batfam goes from a group of seriously messed up individuals who have trouble communicating with each other and fight all the time to Batdad "Kids if you don't stop killing criminals you won't get dessert ffs" Bruce. Violence is played for laughs instead of taken seriously. Yeah they fight, but they still Love Each Other.

And THIS IS PERFECTLY FINE. It's transformative work! And trying to reconcile these disparate fandoms is hard! Fandom is a labor of love. We do it for free. We do it for our own entertainment. And no one is forcing you to read fics you don't like. DLDR and all that.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #meta #danny phantom #dc comics

[voidcoretxt]

chiscara likers think about something canon compliant challenge

#at this point just make ocs. watch a slice of life anime. go to university .idk #theyre sooo silly in canon u can do so much funny shit w them . so why is all the fancontent friends to lovers university aus #!!! and like my fave fic 4 them is one of those its Good . but why dont we think about something interesting now #SORRY FOR BEING SUCH A HATER . my blog my rules but this is mean af nd im srry 4 that #ultimately it really doesnt matter what other people do this is fandom its for . Let People Have Fun #but also. oughhh imso mad #voidcore.txt

[sacredfire44]

Kinda wanna read/write a post-canon Bingqiu fic set years later, where during some routine, silly wife plot, Binghe somehow finds out that the soul attached to his husband’s body is not, in fact, the original soul.

Like any person, his first assumption isn’t that his husband had replaced the original SQQ. It’s that an imposter has replaced his husband.

A skilled imposter. One who knows all of his husband’s little quirks, who slipped under even Binghe’s watchful eye.

Binghe takes care to not indicate that he’s noticed. His blood parasites confirm this is still his husband’s body, and he refuses to scare them into running before he can get the imposter out.

Binghe spends weeks researching and practicing, until he’s finally certain he can tear the imposter’s soul apart without hurting his husband. Praying, desperately, that it’s a powerful possession instead of a replacement. Praying his husband is still alive in there.

Finally, he slips into the imposter’s dreamscape, clinging to threads and forcing his way as close to the soul as possible, for the surface-level dreams show him in SQQ’s body. Inside, he finds a small man, with big eyes and stick-thin arms, features far too similar to his Shizun. A cheap, pathetic mockery of Shen Qingqiu, he makes sure to tell them.

They are weak outside of Shen qingqiu’s powerful body. It is all too easy to restrain them, to rage and revile them for their crimes, to question what they’ve done, to tear them apart, limb from limb-

“How long?,”He’d snarled, furious, claws digging into the pathetic parasite’s left arm, yanking it just far enough for the strain to burn.

“Years,”The imposter says, eyes wide and wet. Crying.

Years. Years with his husband that this imposter has taken, has stolen from them. Nights spent entangled, lazy mornings spent curled into each other’s embrace, soft evenings spent watching the sunset.

Binghe yanks the arm the rest of the way out, relishing in the way the parasite screams. It will know pain for what it’s taken from him, for what it’s taken from his Shizun.

XXXX

At first, Shen Qingqiu, formerly Shen Yuan, didn’t know what was happening. He’d thought of himself as Shen Qingqiu for years now, so waking up in his original body had been confusing and disorienting.

When Binghe appeared as well, he knew immediately it was a nightmare. It couldn’t be anything but that. Binghe, his Binghe as he was now, would never look at him like this, like he was the dirt on the bottom of his shoe, the scum of the earth.

It was rare to have nightmares nowadays. Binghe was always watching his dreams too closely to let something like that slip by. But the last few weeks, he’d been absorbed in his newest little pet project, exhausted and stressed by whatever it was he refused to talk about. Shen Qingqiu didn’t blame him for having one night of sleep without constant vigilance.

“So the imposter shows himself,”Dream-Binghe said, and ah, what an odd thing to dream up! Shen Qingqiu was just as good as the original goods, and he knew it! There was no way at all he had such insecurities, and certainly not any strong enough to appear as dreams! If he’d had such dreams before, that was simply a coincidence, a trick of the mind repeating the scenario it’d already created to avoid making a new one.

But Binghe doesn’t rant and rave at him for lying, doesn’t call out his betrayal. Instead, his eyes hard and cold, his claws tight where they dig into his wrists, he questions him.

Why?

I don’t know, Shen Qingqiu has to answer. I woke up in this body.

Where is he?

I don’t know, he answers again.

How long?

Here, Shen Qingqiu bites down a cry of pain as his left arm his yanked painfully out, a loud pop as it tugs out of his socket. The pain is real, he realizes deliriously. It’s real the way the Punishment Protocol had been. The thought makes ice pool in his chest.

What had he done to deserve a punishment from the System?

The hand tightens, the bones in his wrist creaking ominously at the strength of the hold.

The look in Binghe’s eyes hurts far more, though. Shen Qingqiu doesn’t even notice the tears in his eyes until they’re spilling over, until his voice comes out as a broken warble.

“Years,”He whispers at last, aware he’s hammering the final nail into his coffin.

It’s only as his arm is yanked away, as muscle and sinew tears with a sickening squelch, that it occurs to him. The punishment protocol had worked by sharing his dreamscape with the original Bingge. It hadn’t summoned nightmares out of no where.

This wasn’t Bingge. He’d known it on sight. Had recognized it in the curlier hair, the taller build.

This wasn’t Bingge. This was his husband.

And this wasn’t a dream.

XXX

Binghe watches as the pathetic worm scrambles away from him, gasping and hiccuping through his tears. His remaining arm shakes against the jagged edge of his stump, trying to stem the flow of blood. It won’t do a damn thing. This is a dream world, and that form is just a representation of his soul.

“I’m sorry,”It begs, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Binghe forgive me- “

“Do not call me that,” He hisses. This parasite had squirmed its way in, had settled in and gotten comfortable in its place as his husband, but that spot would only ever belong to his Shizun, his rightful Shizun. Everything else… everything else had been a lie!

“No!,”The imposter gasped. Had Binghe spoken out loud? “No, it wasn’t! I really- I really tried to be honest, I- I-“

It gulped, face pale and wan, tears spilling over its cheeks. Its voice dropped to a whimper.

“I loved you. I thought you loved me too.”

Luo Binghe let out a harsh laugh. So that was the plan? Replace his husband and try and make him grow attached? Try to squirm into his heart, when it was already spoken for?

“I could never love a pathetic fake!,”He snarled. “I’ve been planning your death from the moment I learned!”

The imposter sucked in a sharp breath. They stopped scrambling away, simply sitting before him, shaking and curled into themselves.

It didn’t try to run again as he stepped forward. Not even as he grabbed its leg and tore it from its body. It screamed, and thrashed, but made no effort to pull itself away again.

Instead, the insolent wretch began muttering under his breath, a plea and a prayer in one. Begging for forgiveness, for the dream to end, for Binghe to wake him up. Pathetic. Had the imposter really fallen in love with him over the course of its tenure?

He dug his claws into the stump at its shoulder to stop it. The muttering broke into muffled cries, biting their lip as they struggled to hold them back. A habit he recognized from his husband. Disgusting, he thought, holding to the illusion for pity until the very last second.

“You’re just a cowardly weakling, leeching off of Shen Qingqiu. You fell in love with me? Then know this in your heart.”

Binghe dug his fingers in harder, harder, until his claws scrapped against the shattered bone of the socket and dug in. The parasite’s eyes nearly rolled back into its head as it jerked. Binghe lifted it off the ground by the bone, then held still until the worm caught its breath.

“I could never love the man before me. I would never have even looked at you twice had I known.”

Binghe expands his awareness to the dream world around him. From a greater distance, the soul of the imposter is more like a small flickering flame, a little glow between his hands, than a man.

It takes almost no effort at all, to close his fist around it and smother the flame.

XXX

Binghe wakes up in the morning, ecstatic to finally be done with this journey and desperate for love from his husband who he’s apparently not seen in years.

Shen Qingqiu doesn’t wake up with him.

Shen Qingqiu doesn’t wake up at all.

XXX

Anyway now that I’ve officially written a short version of it I want y’all to know that Shang Qinghua would be the one to tell him, after rushing over when he gets an alert that the account of User 002 was deactivated.

Binghe gets to metaphorically self-destruct, realizing everything he said and did was to his own husband and not an assumed imposter. The world shapes itself to Binghe’s wishes, and he still has access to the holy mausoleum, so he manages to bring back Shen Qingqiu. I debated having him bring back Shen Jiu instead but I love the protagonist of any book I read, and that includes Shen Yuan, so instead he brings back his husband whose heartbroken and runs off, with a new level of instinctive terror to go along with it. Binghe really does try to give him room, but that does neither of them good because Binghe drowns in his guilt and the confirmation of his husband’s fear, and Shen Yuan drowns in his heartbreak and confirmation of his husband’s rejection.

The happy ending comes after a slowburn of binghe groveling and breaking himself down(a la Lost and Found in Limitless Clarity) with a side of both being left with new insecurities to add to the existing ones post-canon.

(And if Binghe now dreams of the delicate flicker of a soul between his hands, now jolts awake to the reminder of how small it was, how easy to smother, well-

-it’s the least he deserves, isn’t it?)

#I really did mean to only type a synopsis #but it got away from me lol #at least it’s out now #considering cleaning it up and posting to AO3 #svsss #scum villain self saving system #scum villain #bingyuan #Bingqiu #luo binghe #Shen yuan #Shen Qingqiu #mxtx #writing #edit: #Tw torture #can’t believe I forgot that lol

[cyberrose2001]

Hi hi! Your op drawings are so good?? My bby aaa drawing him (bots in gen) is so tough, I get too caught up in the details TT

Anyway, since I miss him lol I was wondering if I could request some... uh, gosh I hate this word but idk anything synonymous. Could I request pussydrunk tfp op?

Hope you're having a nice day/night btw <3

- 🍄

TFP pussydrunk!Optimus x reader

Hi hello!!I am very proud of this and it's probably up there with my list of my favourite fics I have ever written. Thank you so much for requesting and liking my silly sketches of the blorbo. I've written this as gender neutral <3

(lowkey ive been writing heaps of OP eating pussy,,, its a canon event for me i cannot intervene..... anyway its 11AM and i havent slept yet but i needed to finish hggggh *dies of horny*)

Warnings: Oral sex (reader receiving), edging, reader has a vagina.

Word count: 657

18+ ONLY! MINORS DNI

Spending time alone with you has learned to be one of Optimus' most treasured past times. But as much as it pains him, relaxing with you is a rare treat. The usual business of the base either keeps him up all night, or he genuinely has no time. However, he tries his best to make the most of it, whether he's relaxing with you, cuddling you, or with his head glued between your inner thighs. 

Like right now. It was nearing two AM. Optimus has you sprawled out on your shared berth, his face pressed against your aching heat, finally finding sweet relief from his built-up arousal. It's been too fragging long since his face was buried in you. He misses it, and if Optimus had a choice, he would sacrifice everything he's worked for to keep you bare before him.

Two hours. Optimus had been lazily lapping at you for two hours now. At one point, his helm had lulled to the side to rest against your right inner thigh to not strain his neck. His glossa grows tired, and his energon roars through his hot frame.

His stamina is almost depleted compared to when he initially delved into your drenched pussy. Despite this, Optimus still has the capacity to tightly grip your hips, gently massaging them as you lie still for him. He is weary, yet he perseveres, ignoring his aching joints and pulsing spike painfully pressed against the berth because tonight is about you. He will make up for all those lonely nights you've spent in berth alone in one lengthy oral session.

It's very often that when Optimus gives you oral, his mind feels like he's been transported to a higher plane of existence, one where he has no responsibilities or obligations to lead a team, just the mind-numbing taste of you. It makes him dizzy and light-headed, similar to the buzz he gets when he has a high grade or two, but Optimus prefers revelling in you instead to get his high. 

As ever patient as you are with your star-crossed lover, your hips still gently roll and shudder involuntarily against his glossa, and Optimus fucking loves it. He loves your soft cries when he sucks on your clit, and he loves when you clamp your legs around his helm when your orgasm is merely within reach. But he won't let you finish just yet, not when he's yet to relish and thoroughly drown himself in your sticky sweet.  

His warm optics remain lazily trained on your face, only fluttering close when you squeeze his helm. The pressure from your thighs only heightens his hunger, a carnal desire to swallow every drop of your aphrodisiac juices. 

"Mmmmm," You mewl, sweaty palms digging into the berth, "Fuck, I missed this… why don't we do this - aah - more often, baby…."

Optimus doesn't respond, and he can't because his processor is so intoxicated and aroused that he can't even form a single coherent sentence. It's quite ironic, he thinks. A mech of his nature that is so poised and articulate in his vocable is conned by his own desperate need to surrender his intake to his humans' essence.

"Mmmffh," He purrs into your heat, parting your sensitive lips with his glossa, lazily swirling around your bud before pressing a gentle kiss against it. He can't help but grind his spike into the berth below at your whimpers, servos kneading into your soft flesh, "More… Primus, I need more…."

You titter breathlessly, snaking a hand to the top of his helm to lightly press his face further into your pulsing heat, and Optimus delightfully grunts. You shiver, biting back a moan at the vibrations, "Go ahead, hun, you've got me for the rest of the night."

Optimus may need to blow a hole into the sun to prevent it from rising, since one night will never be enough to satisfy his thirst for you.

#transformers #transformers prime #transformers x reader #tfp optimus #tfp x reader #tfp optimus x reader #tfp optimus prime x reader #tfp x reader smut #valveplug #smut #cyberrosewrites

[markster666]

Alastor Reacting To Stereotypical Activist Gen Zer (No NSFW really ig)

Me and @rainyvandragon were discussing this last night and we thought it was the funniest thing ever, so I wanted to write a short fic for you guys. Enjoy.

This might be offensive to some audiences but I tried to portray a stereotypical feminist Gen Zer in the eyes of somebody closed minded (somebody like Alastor kinda) so LOL.

The new generation, Gen Z, (1997-2012), started making their appearances in Hell. Alastor, being a gentleman from the 1930s, wasn't used to being around the influx of activists, feminists, vegans, etc. It wasn't until one showed up at the hotel seeking redemption that he truly met his match.

"WHATS UP GIRLY POPS?!!" The Gen Zer kicked open the doors, strutting into the lobby. They turned to Charlie, "Omg, you look SO slay!!"

Alastor looked at them in disgust. What the fuck were they even saying?

The Gen Zer turned to Alastor and gasped in delight, "Omg! Look at youUU-UH."

They walked over to Alastor and sat on the chair next to him.

"What are your pronouns?"

Alastor looked dumbfounded. "My... My what?"

"Pronouns silly! Are you a girl, boy, trans, non-binary, gender-fluid-"

They went on for a couple minutes before Alastor interrupted.

"I'm a boy, my Dear."

"Are you a CIS male?"

Alastor literally was getting so fucking annoyed because he literally has no fucking idea what this mf was talking about.

"...Yes."

"Great! So He/Him. What's your sexuality?"

Alastor didn't know what the fuck that meant.

"...I don't like having sex."

"Omg so you're ASEXUAL? QUEEN!!! LOVE THAT FOR YEWWW-UH!!"

Alastor wanted to die (again).

The Gen Zer got back up and started talking to Charlie. Charlie also looked a little offput but she was a LOT more accepting.

"So... how did you die?"

"Oh, my, GAWD, I literally was at a protest and some stupid fucking cops decided to pump me full of lead! Whatever, at least I went down for fighting in what I believe in."

Angel Dust perked up, "And what do you believe in?"

"WOMENS RIGHTS AND UNRESTRICTED RIGHTS TO ABORTION-UH!"

Alastor was banging his head against the table in the lobby.

"Oh and I also got arrested a few times for vandalizing government property but hey! Worth it!"

Angel Dust was CRACKING up at Alastor's reaction and Charlie was trying to listen attentively.

"We definitely need to completely remove gender roles from our modern society. Oh, I also really miss my husband... I proposed to him recently and he's SUCH a good stay at home dad!"

"WILL YOU JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY!"

Alastor yelled, his voiced filled with radio static.

Angel Dust was on the floor, hollering with laughter.

"Oh my gosh sorry, I should've asked for your beliefs before I started spouting off about them! You know...my mum was kind off...a total fuckin cunt, which is why I cut of all contact with her. She was a Republican, smh."

Alastor threw a table at them.

"OH MY GAWD STOP IT!!!!"

Im sorry guys I'm fucking laughing so hard this is the best head canon ever.

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