ineharnia

[ineharnia]

Does anyone know who the artist of this drawing is? It's probably cropped so reverse image searching on google doesn't help.

Thank you!

#drarry #fanart #Harry potter #draco malfoy #Why do people not credit it's infuriating #my post #drarry fanart

[ineharnia]

I am sorry. I’m bashing Apple here. And for good reason.

This is a plea to my followers.

Stop buying Apple products. I know you’ve used them for most of your life, and I know it’s inconvenient to move to a new brand because in most cases, you cannot take your contacts with you on various chat apps.

I know this is inconvenient. I truly do.

But Apple is not the company it was before. There is now no difference between an Apple computer and a Windows computer in terms of graphic design. I know this for a fact. I had to use both in college 20 years ago, and non-apple computers are now generally better for design work than Apple computers.

Most non-apple companies encourage self-repair of your own devices, while Apple refuses it. I also know this for a fact, as I watched Apple computers become slowly less reparable through the late 90s and early 2000s. Where I was once able to do the repairs on our office computers, we had to start sending out our Apple devices because they started gluing things down on their logic boards. Notably the glue they used was not heat-resistant and led to device damage should the heat sink system fail. But they did this because they wanted to dig more money out of their customers.

Apple software is also designed to fail. I cannot believe people are still buying new devices after the scandal where Apple was slowing their phones in order to force people to purchase new versions.

Apple hardware is designed to become obsolete. Motherboards and logic boards are designed to hold exactly what comes attached to them and will fail if upgrade attempts are made.

Apple refuses to work with software developers despite promises of cross-compatibility. One of the very first coding problems I discovered was to discover a gigantic hole in a software program that made a plotter (giant printer) compatible with iOS. This caused a memory leak, leading to necessary resets of the computer after every 2 feet of printing.

I know that it’s not possible for most of you to just throw your devices away and buy a new one. I wouldn’t be able to do that, either. But eventually there will come a time when you have to upgrade, and I encourage you to take the plunge and purchase a non-apple device. I don’t even have a recommendation for you because literally anything is better than Apple. A rock that you write on is better than an Apple phone.

Unfortunately I expect to be shadow-banned on Apple devices because of this, and I’ll try to report on decreased activity as much as I can.

It’s time to stop trying to beg Apple to change. They won’t. It’s time now to just stop supporting Apple.

#Apple #iphone #Why apple is a bad company #You should buy another phone

[ineharnia]

I turned off anonymous questions

#my blog #anonymous #too many gold star lesbian asks #my post

[ineharnia]

Are you a Gold Star lesbian? (Just in case you don't know what it means, a Gold Star lesbian is a lesbian that has never had the sex with a guy and would never have any intentions of ever doing so)

Fuck off

[ineharnia]

settle this for me once and for all

is “chai” a TYPE of tea??! bc in Hindi/Urdu, the word chai just means tea

#Tea #History #Linguistics #Interesting #Chai

[ineharnia]

as requested- my zine about fat and plus size body types from instagram!💖 happy drawing everyone!

#Art #Drawing tips #Human body #Stretch marks #Fat #Cellulite #Important

[ineharnia]

I’ve been a dedicated Syndisparklez shipper for the past five-six years. As you know (unless you’re new to the ship?) there have been issues with the fandom. After a few of these situations (of which some I’m partially guilty of, but hopefully you’ll forgive me, this was years ago and I’ve grown up since then) I took a step back from the fandom and left all the discord groups and youtube series.

This didn’t stop me from posting Syndisparklez posts, even when the ship almost died from lack of content and Tom having a girlfriend I kept shipping them.

However, a week ago Tom was accused of stuff I won’t say on tumblr because of the ban and despite him refuting the allegations and the inability to prove either side, this hit me really hard. In favor of sociological facts, because of how society currently works I tend to believe the women and unfortunately out of all the stuff that happened to the ship, the chance that he might hurt someone this badly is what broke the camel’s back and made me uncomfortable with shipping him with Jordan.

So I am currently putting any and all of my contributions to the fandom on hold. I won’t delete anything but unless something changes I will not make any more Syndisparklez posts nor make that video I thought I might make at some point this year.

I apologize to the fandom. 

#syndisparklez #captainsparklez #jordan maron #thesyndicateproject #tom cassell #fandom stuff #my post

[ineharnia]

One of my first ships! Omg, its an oldie but goodie.

Adommy!

Wanna rp? Message me.

#adommy #adam lambert #tommy joe ratliff #makeup #glitter #beautiful

[ineharnia]

Boy did I join this fandom late. I've been obsessed with these two for the last year and can't believe I missed it. Seeing how lonely Adam is and watching Tommy's live streams where he's all alone really cement it in my head that these two were meant to be. You can't fake all that, it was real. I don't know why they broke it off or tried to cover it up, but you could tell that they were together from the start of the band. No one has the chemistry these two do and they totally change my opinion of the gay community. I love these two with my whole heart and am so sad I could never see a show with them playing together. Even if nothing happened, the musical chemistry between them is beyond perfect.

#adommy #adam lambert #tommy joe ratliff #oh how i miss this ship #beautiful #glitter

[ineharnia]

Demisexual “So you mean a normal person?” Don’t hate on things you don’t understand.

Person: What’s demisexuality?

Demisexual: It means you don’t get attracted to people unless there’s an emotional bond.

Person: Oh, so like, a normal person?

Demisexual: Actually, no, although I can see how you’d think that. Most people don’t have sex with people unless they have an emotional bond with them but that’s not really to do with sexuality, that’s just staying safe and having common sense.

’Normal’ people, although not intending to sleep with someone right away, still know, usually, whether they would be interested in doing that within a short amount of time, sometimes immediately. People come up to me and say “You’re attractive, can I have your number?” after just seeing me from across a bar. They’ve never spoken to me, don’t know who I am but still found me attractive and are thus interested in getting to know me more to see if they’d like to start a relationship.

Demisexuals don’t experience that. We don’t see underwear adverts and find the actors desirable. We don’t look at someone from across a room and think “they’re hot, I wonder if they’re single”. ‘Sex sells’ goes over our heads. Dating apps where you swipe pictures across the screen are useless. We literally don’t get attracted to people that quickly.

Person: Oh, I see. So it’s not just being picky or abstaining from sex, it’s literal lack of attraction?

Demisexual: Yes, you’ve got it.

Person: That must make dating difficult.

Demisexual: It does. Many of us are interested in dating but are limited to people we know emotionally. If someone asks for my number I then have to say to them ‘can we be friends for roughly two to three years, by then I should know whether I find you physically attractive and if I do we can start dating’. It’s sad because I don’t want to get people’s hopes up or seem like I’m leading them on. But I literally do have to know them for a while before I can get attracted to them if I do at all. It also meant growing up was a strange experience because everyone would be pointing out attractive people on TV, in magazines and when walking down the street and I just didn’t understand.

Person: Well thank you for taking the time to explain that to me. I understand now that there is a difference between abstaining from sex and actually lacking attraction.

Demisexual: No problem. It’s nice to be accepted and understood.

Demisexuals, you are real and valid. Just because people don’t understand what you go through that doesn’t mean what you go through is fake. Pride is about respecting and celebrating all sexualities and their nuances. 

You should also note that demisexuality is common among those on the autism spectrum. To deny demisexuality is not only illogical but it’s also ableism. You’re erasing people’s symptoms because its convenient for you and because you don’t understand them. 

Demisexuals just want to chill and exist. They don’t want fame and to be mollycoddled. They just want awareness and acceptance. 

Let’s not hate on people just because we don’t understand. 

#demisexual #demisexuality #asexuality #for future reference

[ineharnia]

(could you tell me how those lack critical thinking please? not trying to argue, just actually confused)

Sorry for the late reply! The notes on the post itself do a good job of explaining things, but here’s my take.

Abuse is NEVER black and white. It might seem like it is, and for some people thinking about it that way helps, but with all forms of trauma assuming there is one way everyone should process and represent what happened to them is misguided and harmful. 

Like yes at first it does seem reasonable to say that all abusers are evil and that they should never be redeemed and that narratives that frame them as being worthy of forgiveness are harmful, but that in itself is showing a remarkable lack of understanding of what actual abuse survivors go through.

I don’t really know how other to explain it than through anecdotes so this might get a little heavy, I apologize, I’ll add a TL;DR at the end encase you would rather not read about abuse.

That said, the paragraphs below discus childhood sexual assault and emotional abuse.

So I was sexually assaulted when I was ten. For the longest time I hated my abuser, tbh I sort of still do. But he used to be someone I trusted and loved, so it’s hard for me to say things like “he deserves to rot in hell” or “I hope he dies” because…I don’t really feel comfortable saying those things about anyone, even someone as bad as him. Plus, I have reason to believe that he might have hurt me just because he himself was hurt, and while that doesn’t excuse what he did, it makes things a little bit more complicated.

It was only recently that I discovered what became of him. After what happened my family never talked about him, and I never saw him again either. I didn’t go to his trial and no one ever told me what the verdict was. I can’t even find any news articles about it no matter how hard I look. For all I know he didn’t even get punished. And tbh I was fine with that. I didn’t want to think about it. I honestly felt a little embarrassed by it and felt like my family never really believed me. So I was ok with not knowing.

But a couple of years ago he apparently reached out to my mother and started talking to her. I don’t really know WHY, but she felt comfortable talking about whatever he wanted to talk about and some members of my family have welcomed him back into their lives. And when I found that out I felt SO betrayed. I felt violated all over again, and when I went onto his facebook page to block him I saw that he was in a relationship with someone. And part of me really, REALLY wanted to find out who he was dating and tell her what he did. Ruin his life all over again. Because he ruined part of mine, why should he get to be happy? 

But after I calmed down I thought about it….and while I NEVER want to see him again(just the thought of it makes me break out in panic sweats and feel like I’m gonna throw up and cry), who am I to say that he isn’t allowed to try to be a better person? I don’t believe in the death penalty, and he’s only in his 30s. If he can see the error of his ways and grow and change and find a better life….well, I’d rather that than he go back to offending or rot in jail. If he can be forgiven by someone, that’s ok. It doesn’t have to be me, but I am willing to accept that he has a life now, and for better or for worse that’s not something I can control. 

So you see, I cannot condemn him. Part of me still hates him, and I would rather die than ever see him again, and I don’t think I will ever be able to forgive him, but I don’t want him to die. I don’t want to ruin his life. I don’t want to stop him from being a better person. If there is a hell I don’t want him to go there. 

And to say that if I don’t feel like he should be killed I somehow am being a bad survivor or that stories like mine are harmful is….bad. Stories like mine are actually VERY common. Most abuse survivors feel really conflicted about their abusers, some even still love them. Some forgive them. And reflecting that in our fiction is GOOD. 

As another example, my dad has always treated me like crap. He loves me, I know he does, and I know it was mostly because he was sick, but he wasn’t a good dad. He used me as a pawn against my mom, he made me take care of myself way too young, he blamed me for things that weren’t my fault, he yelled at me, he neglected me, all in all he was a really bad father. And I still love him.

I can still remember the good times we had. I remember talking about sci-fi and science, seeing movies, and going out for good food. He bought me nice things when he could and taught me how to cook. He never made fun of my interests, he tried to teach me to drive, he even took me to conventions and helped me make my cosplays. He let me get dogs, and I am still so grateful for those dogs, who I still have and love to this day. He’s also the reason I moved to Arizona and because of that I made new friends and got a job I loved and met my boyfriend(and our 2 year anniversary is tomorrow!).

So yeah, my dad was both a force of good, and a force to harm in my life. He hurt me a lot, and I am still trying to overcome the trauma he caused to this day. I have a lot of negative feelings towards him, and it is hard for me to talk to him, and I do have to remind myself that I don’t have to take care of him, but he’s my dad and I forgive him. I know he loves me. I want him to get better and be a good person. I don’t want him to not have a chance at redemption. I cannot condemn him. 

And these people who think that narratives like mine, where I forgive and move on and the abusers go on to have lives and even be a part of mine, are somehow evil or harmful or invalid are fucking wrong. I don’t feel bad saying that. They are WRONG. Because most people who did have abusive parents will feel the way I feel. Conflicted. A sense of both love and resentment. A reluctance to cast them aside. A desire to care for them when they need you. And a lot of us don’t even feel like we need to forgive them…we just do. Sometimes it’s easier to forgive. And sometimes we just want to have another chance at having a parent that loves us. There’s nothing wrong with that. 

And as other survivors have said, seeing stories where abusive parents and people do see the error of their ways and go on to make an effort and change and try to be a better person and be worthy of redemption is cathartic as hell. It might be unlikely, and it might be an escapist fantasy, but it makes us feel better, and helps us process and cope with our trauma. Like fucking forgive me but sometimes I want to read a story in a world where people who do wrong ARE redeemed and DO make amends and become good people. 

And this post is long enough so I won’t get into it too much but stories where bad people are redeemed are actually GOOD. Everyone fucks up at some point in their lives. Everyone does something awful, something that feels unforgivable. And when we do we see stories like ATLA and Star Wars and Steven Universe and see people who have fucked up and done awful things and who still are given a second chance. The struggle forward isn’t easy, people won’t always forgive you, they shouldn’t be expected to. But these stories tell us that no matter how far we have fallen, we can ALWAYS get back up. We can always be better. We are never beyond saving. We shouldn’t give up. That’s really fucking important for EVERYONE to see. 

And I mean you don’t have to look far to see a world where one fuck up means you are evil. That’s how Tumblr is! A system of morality where one strike and you’re out. Where you can never be redeemed. Where all apologies are performative and anyone who tries to be better is just trying to get people to forgive them so they can be bad again. No one can learn from their mistakes. And that FUCKING SUCKS. I really do not want the world to start being like that too. 

But anyway TL;DR

Most abuse survivors feel really conflicted about their abusers and do not follow a narrative that tumblr believes is “correct”. Acting like there is only one way to process and come to terms with abuse and that depicting anything else in fiction is somehow harmful and evil is in itself harmful and evil. The people making those posts don’t actually seem to care about that and tend to talk over abuse survivors who usually enjoy these narratives because stories where abusers do change and are forgiven are super cathartic and can help us heal more than stories where the opposite happens. In fact a lot of these stories are written by people who have been abused, and once again, acting like these narratives are somehow wrong is harmful as hell and invalidates a lot of people in the name of morality.

Tumblr once again shows a lack of any and all critical thinking and in doing so harms the very people they claim to be protecting because nuance is evil and everything is black and white.

Sorry that this got so long, if you have any other questions feel free to ask.

#abuse #child abuse #sexual assault #redemption #forgiveness #people can change #important

[ineharnia]

Hey guys! 👋 

Hope everyone is well and safe and not climbing the walls just yet 🙂 I just wanted to share something I made with you. 

I’ve spent the last 3 days trying to make this as canonically correct as possible. Some of the shop placements and road placements are up for interpretation. However, every single shop is on there and everything on there features somewhere in canon lit, I also made sure that anything that specifically states where it is and what it’s next to/near is as correct and as accurate as I can get it.

I wanted/needed it for my fic, but I wanted to share it with you guys to help with whatever you’re working on, as I believe it’s a lot more accurate than anything else I was able to find online x

#diagon alley #map #this is awesome #drawing #harry potter #fanfiction

[ineharnia]

To those who are watching Mianite season 3, are there any Syndisparklez moments so far?

Can you please tell me the episodes and minutes?

Thank you

#syndisparklez #captainsparklez #jordan maron #thesyndicateproject #tom cassell #Mianite #Season 3 #my post

[ineharnia]

There’s always a lingering question that I ask myself, which is why do I, a cis bisexual woman, enjoy romance between two men so much?  

There are easy answers, like that it’s just fetishizing.  And like, I find men attractive, yes.  But I also find women attractive.  I don’t have a problem with enjoying het romance, assuming I can find good ones.  I enjoy stories with female characters I can relate to.

But there’s something much deeper at play, IMO.  A friend of mine who is a gender studies professor was the first person to point this out to me, but a lot of women enjoy m/m romance and gay porn because of the lack of women.  It removes a source of pressure and sexism.  Without any women present, you don’t have to constantly evaluate the sexism of their portrayal, or be reminded of negative experiences in your own life.  It allows women to experience romance and especially sexuality without all the baggage that comes with it in our patriarchal society.

This was recently illustrated to me rather dramatically.  I read a recommendation for a het romance.  And it sounded cute, and came highly recommended.  The tropes at play were fun.  Until I read a snippet and realized this was a romance between a woman and her boss.  I had a visceral negative reaction.  

Instantly I’m thinking of sexual harassment stories I’ve read and heard from other women. I’m thinking of how uncomfortable it would be to have your boss develop feelings for you.  How icky the power dynamics would be, etc.  

And then I realized…this wouldn’t bother me if it were two men.  Now, there’s no logical reason for that.  Sexual harassment is just as wrong when its object is a man.  But I know I’ve read fics with a similar premise and never thought about it.  Because when it’s two men I can accept this is just a light romance, a fantasy, meant to be fun and sexy and not to represent the real world.

But I can’t when it’s a het relationship.  There’s too much baggage there.  Too much societal history of abuse.  I can’t relax enough with the premise to enjoy that story.  

Now some people can.  And that’s fine.  And some people are never going to be okay with power imbalances like that regardless of gender.  That’s also fine.  I don’t think having either reaction makes one morally superior.  It’s okay to just enjoy light entertainment for what it is without going into deep analysis.

But it’s much more difficult for me, and I think for many women, to relax and enjoy romantic and sexual stories when they involve female characters.  We’ve been burned too many times by shitty depictions, by shallow role models, by abuse portrayed as romantic.  We have developed a stress response, a trauma response to heterosexual romance.  We are hyper-reactive to a wide variety of triggers in regards to it.   But removing women from the equation makes stories safer for us.  And maybe it shouldn’t?  In an ideal world?  But for many of us, that’s the truth.

#fanfiction #lgbt #sexuality #misogyny #slash #literature #important

[ineharnia]

I completely forgot about making the video!

I can do it though

Can you please remind me of Syndisparklez moments in minecraft videos? I have the vlogs down (unless there are new vlogs)

Thank you!

Syndisparklez is not cancelled

Just because Tom has a girlfriend doesn’t mean a fictional ship has to die. No correlation.

Obviously if you feel uncomfortable shipping them for any reason you don’t have to.

But I don’t think we have to let the shipping fandom die.

I started working on a Syndisparklez video before Tom started showing Linda in his videos and I intend to make it and publish it, unless either Tom or Jordan specifically say in no uncertain terms that they don’t support the ship anymore.

I don’t know, this fandom is fairly fun to be in most of the time. I don’t want it to die. Isn’t Mianite dying bad enough? (rhetorical question)

#syndisparklez #captainsparklez #jordan maron #thesyndicateproject #tom cassell #my post

[ineharnia]

#Lgbt history #Homophobia #Anita bryant #Florida orange juice #Florida citrus #Boycott #Save our children #Thom higgins #Important

[ineharnia]

:/

#halloween #a nightmare before christmas #comics #depression #webtoon #Seth in space #art #important