poetryforventing

[poetryforventing]

I want to write happy poetry

I found love and feel good mostly

I don't look after myself well enough and that scares me

But, yeah, I feel good mostly

And I want to write happy poetry

But there's genocide on the news

And our leaders approve

And a friend says 'both sides are just as bad'

Like, hon

Shut up

It's fucking genocide

Did we learn nothing from history

From imperialism

From fucking concentration camps?

It's sickening

And I feel so powerless

Poor and unheard

A jumped up insect in the dirt

If only my white guilt could bring back all those beautiful brown bodies from the earth

If I shed a tear for every life lost will I become a white savior or a dried up husk?

I've never earned much more than minimum wage

But at least I don't expect an early grave under the rubble of my home or a hospital

At least I'm not a body in the background of a soldier's TikTok

I wish I had an answer to all of this

I wish I had the power to save all those lives

But I've spent 28 years and counting trying to save my own

And I'm one of the lucky ones, I've made it this far

So all I can do is speak my mind:

Ceasefire, now.

Then free Palestine.

[poetryforventing]

I want to write happy poetry

I found love and feel good mostly

I don't look after myself well enough and that scares me

But, yeah, I feel good mostly

And I want to write happy poetry

But there's genocide on the news

And our leaders approve

And a friend says 'both sides are just as bad'

Like, hon

Shut up

It's fucking genocide

Did we learn nothing from history

From imperialism

From fucking concentration camps?

It's sickening

And I feel so powerless

Poor and unheard

A jumped up insect in the dirt

If only my white guilt could bring back all those beautiful brown bodies from the earth

If I shed a tear for every life lost will I become a white savior or a dried up husk?

I've never earned much more than minimum wage

But at least I don't expect an early grave under the rubble of my home or a hospital

At least I'm not a body in the background of a soldier's TikTok

I wish I had an answer to all of this

I wish I had the power to save all those lives

But I've spent 28 years and counting trying to save my own

And I'm one of the lucky ones, I've made it this far

So all I can do is speak my mind:

Ceasefire, now.

Then free Palestine.

#poetry #free verse #palestine #israel #war #genocide #gaza #free palestine

[poetryforventing]

their blood is your blood

is my blood too and it spills

now from our own chest

#poetry #haiku #war #genocide #war crimes #gaza #blood

[poetryforventing]

do you see those crying kids

those lifeless infants

the phosphorous

or are you not looking at all

I guess genocide isn't cool

so just wait it out

until it's over

until everyone in Gaza is dead

and pretend

afterwards

that you fucking cared

[poetryforventing]

do you see those crying kids

those lifeless infants

the phosphorous

or are you not looking at all

I guess genocide isn't cool

so just wait it out

until it's over

until everyone in Gaza is dead

and pretend

afterwards

that you fucking cared

#poetry #free verse #palestine #israel #gaza #genocide #ethnic cleansing #war crimes

[poetryforventing]

a simple way of saying hey of saying hi of saying how are you today

i send a message every day and everywhere and every way i know how

i'm reaching out i'm reaching up i'm reaching for god in the rain

anything that gives me hope against hope that maybe you are okay

it's been a week it's been a month it's been a year since i heard

a single word from your mouth and although fucking it hurts

i hope you hate me and my guts and that it's nothing worse

cause the last time we talked your words were black as a hearse

#poetry #freeform #slam #death #depression #anxiety #suicide

[poetryforventing]

you love me but I

love you more and it’s not cute

it’s fucking tragic

#poetry #haiku #love #anxiety #unrequited #relationships

[poetryforventing]

everything unravelling over again

destabilization and entropy

my mind is a mess and my heart is the same

the only way out was the only way in

#poetry #depression #anxiety #mental health #relationships #pain #time #love #loss #fear #uncertainty

[poetryforventing]

you recoil when I get close

it’s exactly what I didn’t want

you say it’s fine but I know it’s not

either you’re lying to yourself

or you’re not who I thought

#poetry #freeform #love #relationships #heartbreak #depression #mental health #anxiety #break up

[poetryforventing]

back again

thinking about the things I’ll never have again

thinking about the ways I’ll never feel again

thinking about the ones that got away again

thinking about all that wasted time I spent

and all that wasted time I’ll spend

chasing another one of the ones that get away

in search of feeling all the same old ways

grasping for them like an answer to my pain

 until inevitably they fade away

#poetry #freeform #desire #love #loss #hope #fear #pain #depression #anxiety #mental health

[poetryforventing]

there is no refuge from this storm

and when it comes it comes at once

cut and bruised and beaten up

is not and never will be enough

#poetry #depression #trauma #mental health #loneliness #sadness #pain #fear #freeform

[poetryforventing]

a whole year of convincing myself that you felt a spark

and in an instant you tore my theory apart 

for you: a passing bad taste at the back of your throat

for me: bile black with blood as I regurgitate my heart

#poetry #love #failure #depression #relationships #desire #unrequited #delusion #mental health #freeform

[poetryforventing]

there’s a fear in me I’ve never felt before

it’s spiraling and uncontrolled

this is a world awash in violent tones

and I’m struggling to find my home

I’m treading water on and on

maybe dying, maybe not

they say ‘I hate to say I told you so’

but they love to say ‘I told you so’

so say it all you want

but I’m uneducated, poor, unmedicated, scared

your self-superior sentiments aren’t a lifeline

they’re a noose

#poetry #freeform #anxiety #depression #fear #poor #money #education #health #healthcare #mental health

[poetryforventing]

things change even when

they stay the same, love fades and

hatred burns away

#poetry #haiku #time #change #love #hatred

[poetryforventing]

‘give me a savior,’ I say

‘or give me death’

point blank refusing

to save myself

#poetry #depression #dependancy #loneliness #anxiety #mental health #suicide #freeform

[poetryforventing]

I put my fears on you when you contract by rights

moody when I don’t get what I want, I’m hurting you like it’s a sport

you deserve so much better, all you’ve ever been to me is a friend

I wish you would escape, save yourself 

-

when you contract by rights I pull away like a child

I’m hurting you like it’s a sport, your punishment for not loving me

all you’ve ever been to me is a friend, which is the problem

save yourself, I don’t know if I can change

-

I put my fears on you, I pull away like a child

moody when I don’t get what I want, your punishment for not loving me

you deserve so much better, which is the problem

I wish you would escape, I don’t know if I can change

#poetry #love #desire #problematic #relationships #loss #mental health #depression #anxiety #freeform #change #doubt #friend #hurt #fear

[poetryforventing]

REFLECTION

I was too young

when you whispered in my ear

and when I should have seen you using me

instead I choked on fear

you shaped my relationships

my education and career

friends called you controlling

but I didn't want to hear

I did all you asked of me

year on wasted year

and you threw me out eventually

when you found in me a mirror

#poetry #freeform #love #loss #abuse #abusive #lies #control #controlling #ex #mental health #anxiety #depression #relationships #gaslighting #emotional abuse