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soullessjack · 8 months

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when you don’t know who you are and you think you’re human and normal until you find out you’re not human, not normal, you’re something else entirely and whatever idea you had about yourself was fucking wrong and you can do weird unnatural things that scare you and aren’t fully controllable yet. and you just want to understand yourself and control yourself so you don’t hurt anyone and can still be the person you think you are instead whatever the truth holds for you.

and you try and use this weird new truth about yourself to try and do good and help the world you were born in and come to love so much and you’re like a hero you wanna be a hero. but the world doesn’t love you back or see you as a hero, it hates you. it doesn’t believe you’re a hero. it doesn’t know what you are , it doesn’t know why you’re here , it demands that you answer the same questions you’ve had your whole life

and instead of finding the answer you find something else . You find a way to do good and be loved and accepted and feel normal despite yourself and you think you’ve found a foothold you think you’ve found understanding at long last . You think you belong snd you think This Is Who You Are until it’s ripped the fuck away from you when finally you learn the truth you’ve been fearing yet searching so hard for. you finally have answers to the lifelong questions of who are you what are you really where do you come from and boom. You’re not a hero . You’re the very threat and danger that the world kept saying you were, kept hurting you because they thought you were.

Every single weird thing you can do has a purpose to destroy and kill and you are born to be a weapon and you can never love anything. Or be loved in return because what you are is a weapon a monster a freak a thing that should not be a thing that will never belong and is fundamentally unlovable . And you’re sorry that’s what you are. You’re so sorry that’s what you are and you hate that it’s the truth and you wish you could go back to not knowing anything at all and you wish you could stop being this fucking Thing but you can’t because it’s in your fucking blood and your DNA and your double helixes and your flesh and nerves and everything.

Your entire body and being and existence and core is made for something horrible and evil and you hate it but you can’t do anything about it except say you’re sorry and offer yourself to the gun or the altar because you still. At the point where you’ve relegated yourself to only being this thing, you still don’t want to, . The last good thing you can do at this point is let yourself die and spare the world from your own inescapable inherent biological ruinousness.

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strongsassysexysloane · 1 year

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NCISLA: New Beginnings, 14x20

Spoilers ahead...

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Ok but why did the Challenger have to pay the price?! Seriously.

I really enjoyed the opening. Everyone getting their family moment.

The Deeks Touche moment was just 🥰 their little family unit is so cute and I wished we got to see a whole lot more of it. Them camping? Yes, please. The banter, Deeks talking to himself. They really went all in for this moment.

Poor Anna. This whole wedding thing is doing my head in, can't imagine how she feels. And Arkady had that coming. Don't sneak up behind Anna, silly old man.

Poor Sam. I want him to have a good ending with his father.

Did anyone else get emotional over the opening credits?? It took me half a second to pay attention and notice what they'd done.

#ncisla #ncis los angeles #densi #ncisla 14x20 #ncis la spoilers

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ineffableuser · 2 years

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Chuck used to be so nice…

#i’m done with season 14 #gosh #this finale was #unexpected #athough i knew about chuck ending up as a villain #still i liked him #oh well #supernatural #spn #spn spoilers #supernatural spoilers #spn 14x20 #spn chuck

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monsters-demons-and-ai-oh-my · 5 years

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Sam shooting “God” in of itself: Badass

Sam reacting instinctively and shooting “God” on the verge of tears out of anger and desperation risking his life because the kid he still loves despite everything that’s happened is writhing in pain crying out and dying on the ground:

#SPN #Supernatural #Sam Winchester #Jack Kline #14x20 spoiler #I'm not okay I'm dying #It's okay I didn't need my heart today anyway

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faramaiofnerdwoodforest · 5 years

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14x20 “Moriah”

#spnedit #spn edit #spn spoiler #spn spoilers #14x20 spoiler #spn 14x20 #jack kline #jackedit #jack edit #deanedit #dean edit #casedit #cas edit #gif #gif set #my gifs

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verobatto · 5 years

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Destiel break up

We are still waiting for the talk... In an episode where true can kill

Supernatural 14x20 meta "Moriah"

Hello my friends! Are you excited? I can't believe we just need to wait till September or October to next season... But well.

I will start the lasts metas about 14x20 with the Destiel one, huge amount of it...

And as Dabb said, writers lie and he lied to us bc the guys didn't find out about the deal with the Empty. 🤷

Let's start here...

Mirror land

Jack getting out the Mal'ak box, yelling YOU LIED TO ME. Then rejecting his dad's, then walking down the street surrended by people "lying" to each other... The magical thing here was each couple was a Destiel mirror, and those couples were breaking up. Dressed in Destiel colored code... Saying cliche quotes as "It wasn't you, it was me" or talking with their kid About being separated but still loving him.

So Jack was sick of lies... And this episode was a parallel to episode 14x09 from mid season, if you want to read my met LIAR LIAR, WHAT ARE YOU HIDDEN FROM ME? Is here.

In that episode LIES was a centric topic, everybody was lying. But Jack tried to fix that... And then no one could lie.

But let's come back to the scene in which Jack left the bunker and his three dad's began to discuss what to do with him, again the tension, and again the fight between Dean and Cas, and CAS passing by Dean, in his way, he brushed brusquely his shoulder against the hunter's. Yes... He never do that, not now... I thought he was just about to punch him in the face, but he didn't. He just looked at him with his bitch face and left. Without a word... No before a good eye fucking... Obviously Sammy was there too, feeling awkward. PrayxSammy...

After this "lovers separation" Dean and Sam entered to that shop of Mirrors... Because we love to be redundant here when is about Destiel.. and well... We had a lot of mess aaaaand... The next thing...

Dean panic to a love confession

When Dean and Sam were inside an office to be separated from the mess and scandal that was outside the place, there was a TV with a news program on it. The woman in red (Dean mirror) was talking about the president being TOO MUCH HONEST ABOUT HIS TAXES. And the word SCANDAL was writing in the flag. When she ended talking her partner (dressed with a blue suit, Castiel mirror) made a brutal and honest love confession of his secret and hidden love for her. She just stayed there without saying a word, but happy... So... Remember this?

Gif set credit @girellah

So yes... He remained mute... But I'm sure that after this... Dean was recalling the confession with butterflies inside his stomach... 😏💕

So... What did Dean do??? He just shut the TV as if he was watching a ghost is something on it... With panic in his eyes!!!! So... Dean bean, are you afraid to confess your feelings for your friend???? As I wrote in my first fic... "Love is scary" DEAN IS AFRAID OF WHAT HE FEELS FOR CAS. He knows he has to, maybe, have that talk with him (the talk this season 14 was foreshadowing...) But he is still afraid of it... Of the truth.

We are still waiting for THE TALK

And there was an Easter egg in Jack's grandparents house... The address number was:

8715. So I could say...8x07? And season 15???

I will be very wild with this Destiel spec, but hey, is just a game here, and if we never get that talk...as I always say, I will write a lot of fics for you...

Ok... 8x07... Castiel coming back from Purgatory and this scene...

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

They had one talk back then, in which Dean altered his own thoughts and memories bc he couldn't handle the truth... But Castiel made him see the truth.

Gif credit @inacatastrophicmind

We can say, they had an honest talk here... A good one... It was interrupted twice, and Dean looked so hurt after the truth. But they were honest with each other.

So in this episode we had a recall to that one. And is a good thing to keep the hopes for one honest talk next season.

The second fight

The second fight between Dean and Castiel occurred when Chuck asked them to sacrifice Jack. "I know you don't like this. And I don't care." That quote from Dean to Cas was a big one too. Cas remained quiet again, putting his bitch face again and left. Second separation in the same episode.

When Dean found Jack and Castiel I'm the cemetery, Castiel put himself as a shield. And this made me recall that song again from 14x06: YOU LOVE ME BUT IN YOUR HEART THERE'S SOMETHING BEFORE ME." That something is Jack.

The good thing is Castiel saw Dean desisting from killing Jack... And we saw them again together as TFW against that huge amount of monsters.

To conclude

I think maybe the lovers separation is accurate to this episode.

This episode was linked to 14x06 OPTIMISM and 14x09 the Spear, the first one talked about accepting your true love and separation and the second one talked about lies and manipulation.

I think we had to wait to next season for the talk we deserve with honesty between Dean and Castiel.

Thanks for reading this! I'll see you in the next meta!

Tagging @metafest @gneisscastiel @mrsaquaman187 @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @agusvedder @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @castiellover20 @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @cheerstofandomfamily @drsilverfish @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @hippyatheart80 @anarchiana

Buenos Aires April 25th 2019 11:53 PM

#supernatural meta #destiel meta #14x20 meta #14x20 spoiler #moriah

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ain-t-bovvered · 5 years

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