#Hot Ticket 108 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arianadevareux · 1 year

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I posted 109 times in 2022

84 posts created (77%)

25 posts reblogged (23%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@lenas-oc-chronicles

@zalera8310

@ariana-maryse

@tawneybel

@arianadevareux

I tagged 108 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#anon message - 38 posts

#get to know me - 23 posts

#ask game - 23 posts

#anon ask - 11 posts

#self reblog - 10 posts

#groovy-lady - 7 posts

#anon request - 6 posts

#update - 6 posts

#willy wonka - 6 posts

#mommymilks - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 65 characters

#i need to link this blog to my writing ones but i keep forgetting

My Top Posts in 2022:

Ooh! Oooh! Oooh! You know who's sooo hot??? Jack Davenport!!!

Yess omg. His character in PotC is a big part of the fic I've got planned for it, too. I've only seen him in that series and The Talented Mr. Ripley. I should watch more of his work.

He's got that, like, teacher that you're hot for thing going on. Know what I mean?

18 notes - Posted July 3, 2022

Why wouldn't you date?

WAIT I NEVER SAW SPY KIDS so I'm going off of what I gathered from the Wiki.

(Didn't know Alan Cumming was in the movie lookin hot as hell. I'mma watch it because everything I've seen of this movie is nothing but gold.)

I wouldn't date Fegan Floop because his name is Fegan Floop. Like bro lmao. Come on.

Send me a character and I'll tell you why I wouldn't date them!

20 notes - Posted March 5, 2022

No thoughts, just Colin Firth.

Approved.

46 notes - Posted June 30, 2022

Yandere!Melina Vostokoff x Fem!Reader Headcanons

(For @mommymilks - Happy Birthday, boo!)

SFW

No surprise here, but Melina would absolutely use her tech to keep tabs on you at all times. She'd always know where you are, who you're with, and everything about anyone you know.

She'd love to call you little pet names - my love, my darling, my pet, etc. But she would always preface it with, "my."

If someone gets too close or threatens to keep you from her, Melina wouldn't be above using the mind control substance to keep them in line. If they continue, she has a lot of tools at her disposal to get rid of them.

She's also not above using it on you, if need be. She'd struggle with it for a while, but she'd rationalize her decision by reminding herself that she's doing it to keep you safe. To keep you hers.

NSFW

Melina would show her obsession with you through body worship. She'd touch and kiss every part of you, reminding you of how beautiful you are.

She'd be into edging you a lot. She'd want to prolong the experience as long as possible; the two of you alone together, you calling out her name. Absolute bliss.

Melina would also enjoy orgasm denial. Not only would it tie into edging, it'd give her a reason to praise you - calling you her good girl when she finally lets you finish. "Come for me, my darling."

She can be a mild exhibitionist - depending on where you are/where you're going. She'd love to use a remote controlled vibrator on you in public on occasion. Just knowing that she can get you off while others are around, wishing they could even touch you, would bring her great pleasure. Plus, you'd look so cute trying to hide what's happening.

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116 notes - Posted April 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Imagine...

Reuniting with your childhood sweetheart, Willy Wonka, during the factory tour.

(For @groovy-lady)

"Y/N, you simply won't believe the news!" Your friend, Mrs, Bucket, chirped excitedly as the two of you met up to run errands together. The two of you had worked together previously, and she became a good friend to you despite the infrequency of your contact.

"What is it, Hellen?"

"Charlie's found it - the last golden ticket! Isn't it exciting?" She was more animated than you'd seen her in a long time, and she continued quickly. "I was thinking - and forgive me if this is too bold, but, I was thinking... perhaps you could take him for the tour?" And then you saw it - the mischievous glint in her eye.

Hellen knew a secret that you'd told few others - you'd known Willy Wonka when the two of you were children, and had been an item for much of your youth.

"I understand if you can't, or don't want to. I just thought... Oh, I don't know. Maybe it's silly." You told her you would think about it, and she didn't mention it again as you went onto your errands.

After that, it seemed as if you somehow saw more of his name everywhere you went; advertisement and news articles. Of course it was the fervor around the contest, but nonetheless you couldn't escape the ghost of your past. It was a pleasant ghost, at least.

There was a form to send in before the tour, giving the names of the chaperones. You'd kept it visible, and quickly penned your name down before the deadline.

It all happened so fast - Hellen asked, you agreed, and in the blink of an eye you were standing at the gates with Charlie by your side. And then the moments dragged until Wonka himself finally emerged. He looked very different, of course, but yet somehow still the same. The other guardians were quick to rush up to introduce themselves and their children, but he hurried through them until he got to you.

"And Y/N. I was looking forward to seeing you most of all. You do remember me, don't you?"

The candy maker lit up when you told him that you did remember him, grinning wide and looking much like the boy you'd known long ago.

"I named one of my chocolates after you, you know. And I'll tell you a secret - it's my most favorite creation." He paused only a moment before continuing, "come, I've got such marvelous things to show you."

He held out his arm for you to take, paying no mind to the other chaperones as he lead the group inside.

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119 notes - Posted July 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #i reblogged from myself the most lmao

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angiebowiearchive · 1 year

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Angie’s Confessions at Timothy Lock’s G-Spot Transcript [Part 1] (2006)

(originally transcribed by me in 2006 and posted on an old LJ community. These are the same transcriptions from that time and I can no longer verify how accurate it may be Wayback link to the episode summary, mp3 link does not work; if anyone still has these audio files/knows how to access them, let me know.)

Timothy: On the phone with me right now from sunny Tucson, Arizona is the fabulous Angie Bowie. Angie how are you today?

Angie:I’m fine Timothy how are you? Hi everyone who’s listening.

Timothy: Do you know what, I am melting. London is in the middle of a heat wave right now.

Angie: Well I am very, very sympathetic. We’re in the middle of Monsoon Madness two thousand and six it’s 105, 108.

Timothy: Oh my God

Angie: Tucson is usually ten degrees cooler than Phoenix, so for it to be this hot you can imagine in Phoenix they’re seeing 114, 118 temperatures. Now what is the temperature in London

Timothy: It’s um, Celsius it’s about 35 today, which I think is the high eighties

Angie: Yeah well for London with all that concrete that’s high

Timothy: D’ you know what, they, they had a wonderful picture in this newspaper the other day. You know the whole quote of you ‘oh you can fry an egg on the sidewalk?’

Angie: Uh-huh

Timothy: Well they actually fried an egg on the top of a black cab

Angie: Oh yeah I saw that picture!

Timothy: Isn’t that great?

Angie: Yes and that demonstrates that it is darned hot.

Timothy: Oh definitely

Angie: Yeah. I’m listening to your accent. Tell me where you’re from.

Timothy: I’m from Toronto originally.

Angie: Ahh! And where are you living now?

Timothy: I am living in London, and I’ve lived here for the past nine years.

Angie: I thought so when I was listening! You know my mother was Canadian, and my father grew up Canada, in British Columbia. I’m sure you wouldn’t know that, but I did and so I was listening to your voice. How nice! And so you’ve lived in London what, nine or ten years now?

Timothy: Nine years now yeah

Angie: Oh, and are you enjoying it? Of course, or you wouldn’t be here.

Timothy: Angie, I love it. It’s my favorite city on the planet. I’ve lived in New York, Calgary, Toronto, Orlando and London I love, I will never move.

Angie: Good! Good for you. Well I couldn’t agree with you more. Of course it’s a little-when I went there on those last two trips, you know it was so bizarre because of the CCTV.

Timothy: Oh I know

Angie: And I, you know one of the taxi drivers was so cute, I said to him, I said ‘and I guess you can’t go down there, he said ‘no,’ he said ‘the ticket would be in two weeks in my mail box’

Timothy: [laughs]

Angie: And we both started laughing, he said ‘yeah, you can’t even get in trouble if you want to now’

Timothy: Do you know what, here in London one of the big television shows is Big Brother. I don’t know if it’s big in the States at all?

Angie: I’m not sure, but I think when I was in England I saw it advertised and I didn’t get to what it, I was-that’s when I was on call for Patrick.

Timothy: Patrick Lily sends his love by the way

Angie: Oh good! And please give him a big, big hug for me

Timothy: I definitely will. And the thing about Big Brother is I say it’s being famous for being on CCTV.

Angie: Yeah.

Timothy: And I thought you know if that’s the case, you know, then I should be famous for urinating behind every dumpster in London when I’m drunk.

Angie: [laughs]

Timothy: Now when I was thinking about talking with Angie Bowie, I thought you know, you’re someone I can’t really label under one banner. And the obvious thing would be to, you know, focus on your opinions of your ex husband David Bowie, but that’s been done to death Angie. You’ve also detailed it in your best selling autobiography Backstage Passes: Life On The Wild Side with David Bowie. I’m not going to draw you into a discussion about David Bowie because that’s unfair and you’re my guest and I want you to feel welcome.

Angie: Oh you’re very sweet Timothy, I appreciate it, and it’s not because of anything bizarre. It’s not like, you know, a publicist say, saying ‘oh and she won’t talk about that’, it’s not that. I haven’t seen him for twenty five or thirty years. So talking about him, talking about him in the context of the seventies-

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: -as my artist, the artist I was promoting and the person I was managing, no problem. But you know, they, people have recently been asking me-they, they sprung an interview in the Evening Standard on me.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: Very huge interview. And the gal was very sweet. Unfortunately when I first heard her name, I-I had to do a double take because I wanted to make sure that I addressed her correctly during the interview.

Timothy: What was her name?

Angie: Emine. And it’s a strange name, you know what I mean

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: So I was already, you know, and the next question she asked me was ‘ what do you think of David Bowie?’ And I said [stammers a bit] ‘He’s a jackass!’ What do you mean what do I think of David Bowie? You know, I haven’t seen him for twenty seven, thirty years, why would I have an opinion on him?

Timothy: Yeah, exactly.

Angie:So um, then of course that became the most quoted thing, you know, coming to the States newspapers. And that’s okay, I don’t mind a bit ‘cause it’s exactly how I feel but it’s boring! I don’t wanna promote him anymore, I’m not being paid for it. I just don’t have time for this now

Timothy:It’s like someone asking me ‘what did you feel like when you went to see Star Wars in the cinema?’ I’ll be like ‘I was seven years old, I have no idea’

Angie:Yeah really and why should I promote them now?

Timothy:Yeah exactly

Angie: They’re part of the culture, you know, ask someone who wrote it, go talk to, you know Lucas

Timothy: Yeah, ask someone who’s actually getting royalties from it

Angie: Yes, exactly. Well that’s the whole thing Timothy: And I know it’s hard to start a discussion with you at one point, but let’s start in America in the 1960’s when you were attending Connecticut College for Women.

Angie: Well I, yeah, uh. I took my A levels when I was fifteen.

Timothy: Mm-hm

Angie: And I wanted to take a year off and my father wouldn’t hear of it. So I couldn’t go to college in England, they wouldn’t let me go, they said ‘sure, come back when you’re eighteen’. But my father said ‘oh well in that case you can go to college in the United States’. So I’m, you know, filled out application forms and I was accepted at Connecticut College for Women. I hated it. It was the most horrible place. I didn’t want to be there. I didn’t understand the girls, I didn’t understand the way they taught. They had these huge classes. I’d never been in a huge class in my life, the biggest I’d ever been in was thirty-two people. I’d never taken a class in an auditorium. And I had performed at the [unintelligible], Expo in 1964 and done the play [unintelligible], for five days, I had done a lot of sophisticated things. But what I had not done was be treated like a, um, a unit to be educated.

Timothy: Right

Angie: And uh, I was appalled. So I fell in love with this girl, and um, because I had done a deal with my father that I wouldn’t get pregnant or embarrass him or sleep with men. Leaving myself the out, I kept thinking to myself ‘well that way I can always sleep with girls, I won’t get pregnant, right?’

Timothy: Well there ya go.

Angie: Well ya gotta make due with what ya got, right? So that was fine, but then I got asked to leave. She got put in the infirmary, I went to visit her there, they tried to sedate me so I leapt out the window and escaped and went and packed my stuff and said ‘ya know what, before you ask me to leave, I’m leaving.’

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: And I went back to my parents from Cyprus, the [unintelligible], who were in New Haven, and from then I got my ticket back to Cyprus.

Timothy: Now Angie, did you consider yourself a lesbian at that time?

Angie: No

Timothy: What did you consider yourself?

Angie: A bisexual

Timothy: Now your autobiography, as one reviewer puts it, and I quote, details your ‘drug-fueled and openly bisexual lifestyle’ together David Bowie and many other well known rockers. Now if you look back at the experiences you’ve had and, you know, speaking of the drugs, the substances you’ve tried, do you think drugs should be legalized?

Angie: Well unfortunately we have to back up a little. Your question is premature.

Timothy: Right, okay.

Angie: I didn’t do any drugs until I was twenty six years old, so, so no. It wasn’t ‘drug fueled’. I didn’t drink and I didn’t smoke.

Timothy: Right.

Angie: And people don’t understand if you start your public life at nineteen.

Timothy: Yes

Angie: That’s eight years of being on the ball, so all this crap about ‘drug-fueled’, you know, that’s in the minds of a wannabe wisher they had been there.

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: Drugs were a, uh, became a part of David’s life three or four years before I had anything to do with it and when I had something to with it, it’s all written in Backstage Passes, I’m not gonna bore myself or you.

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: But…do I think they should be legalized? Yes, I think marijuana should be legalized, I mean as everybody in any civilized country knows. Um, alcohol, I don’t believe in uh, prohibition, but I think every health class in the world ought to explain the effects of alcohol and how stupid it is, and how easy it is to get date raped if you’re already high on alcohol.

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: I think children in, in middle school and high school, like they taught in England-do you know in America if you talk to a kid-probably Canada’s a little better, okay, so I’m not lumping Canada in there-when my daughter was at middle school, I had to sit down, she and three of her friends, they came to me and they said, ‘Mom what is it?’ My daughter had brought these kids in, and she said ‘Mom, I told everybody that if anyone would give us sex education, you would’. And I said absolutely. And I gave them a lecture, I explained to them about all kinds of venereal diseases, every type that there were. Because in England, when we were at college, that information was available.

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: You know, and everyone knew. You went and found out before you slept with somebody. And um, when I finished the lecture, I said ‘well don’t they teach you that? Don’t you have a health class or something?’ I didn’t know. But she was at a private, you know, middle school. Not a-a kind of a state run one, and I guess they just didn’t feel that it was appropriate, I guess they didn’t know whether the parents would, you know, approve of them teaching them that kind of health class, but I think it’s really tragic in the countries where it’s not taught. I’m not pointing fingers at anyone because I’m sure in Europe that is not the case so much but here in America, this is a parochial-ism about matters to do with sexuality that I find very frightening and worrisome.

Timothy: Which is?

Angie: That they’re not taught!

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: It’s not that they don’t know. I mean really they, get a lot, everyone here, the youngsters here, seem to get most of their information from the television, which is-that’s not a bad thing, I’m not knocking this, I’m just saying I don’t understand. I mean, wouldn’t it be better to give people the facts in a classroom environment and then let them fill it in with what you read in magazines and what you see on television and on the Internet?

Timothy: Yeah

Angie; I just-I worry about things like that. It’s like history. They don’t teach history here properly now. You talk to them about World War II, they actually, you know, my generation-my father was a World War II hero from the Philippines. He wasn’t there to fight in the-he was there as a mining engineer. When the war broke out, when Pearl Harbor started, he was caught in North Lazon. They took to the mountains, he and the men that worked for him, they joined the resistance movement. Because he was ROTC, that meant he had to be commissioned and became an officer. For three years, they fought from the mountains. World War II is a live thing to me.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: It’s a part of my father’s life. Now, if we’re not gonna have, ya know, kids who have a relative who can explain it to them, then at least let’s teach it in school so, you know, everyone knows who was on which side, what the-the reasons they went to war were, I mean something. Children don’t know that anymore and that’s not good.

Timothy: Well Angie lets go to back to the topic of sexuality. As a mother yourself, what do you think the most important thing is that parents should teach their children about sexuality?

Angie: I think the most important thing is to remind everyone that children and humans don’t mature until they’re eighteen or nineteen. So sex before eighteen or nineteen-I didn’t have sex with anyone until I was eighteen. My eighteenth birthday, chronicled in Backstage Passes, I had sex with my boyfriend, it was very exciting. Now, the reason for that is, is because a mammal does not mature, get it’s fu-and even then there’s another four or five years after eighteen up to twenty five and twenty six when people fill out and mature. Height, strength in the shoulders, spine all that. Now, if a girl gets pregnant, she has a new weight to bear. So having sex, which-and, and we’re talking historically now where you get pregnant, not, you know, protected sex, this is a new concept from the 20th century, one we learned about birth control and family planning. But you see what I’m saying here.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: The best idea would be to wait until your body was big enough to carry it. Now we’re not talking about nine year olds that run up and down the mountains and happen to get pregnant in, uh, strange out-of-the-way South American countries which are, you know, on the cover of the British newspapers all the time. Basically, I think the most important thing is that. Is if you can say ‘look, wait until you’re eighteen so that at least your body is skeletally, you know, in the right place for it’.

Timothy: Right.

Angie: Now the great thing about putting it in that kind of term is, is that it stops being a moral issue, it stops being a judgment issue. It kind of tidies it up along with health. You know, would you drink from a dirty cup in a dumpster?

Timothy: No, definitely not.

Angie: You see what I’m saying?

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: Why would you have sex with someone that you don’t really know where they’ve been?

Timothy: Mmm

Angie: And it’s like some experiment, and you just wanna like fuck around? Ick!

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: It’s a dirty cup in a dumpster! You don’t know where the hell it’s been.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: So I think by the age of eighteen, you start to think like that. At fourteen and fifteen and sixteen and seventeen, one tends to be less-but, but, it-less aware, but if you’re informed, you try for the purpose of being mature, you know, and grown up and being cool-to think about that stuff so that you don’t act like a jackass. And I’ve acted like a jackass many times in my life, so please don’t think I’m trying to make out I’m so clever, I don’t mean it like that. We learn through our mistakes. In answer to your question, I would say hold onto it just for a bit, you know what I mean.

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: The idea that people have sex so early kind of amazed me. It shocked me. I didn’t realize that people fourteen and fifteen and sixteen years old were having sex. I had no idea. I’m very naïve I suppose in a lot of ways.

Timothy: Now how did you approach the subject yourself, of discussing sexuality with your children? Angie: I, well I never did with my son because I didn’t see him after he was fourteen.

Timothy: Yes

Angie: It wasn’t an issue. With my daughter, she came to me, you know, and we were always very straight forward. I-I just, I have a European attitude about it, thank God, from growing up. God knows Cyprus was no help, but Switzerland and England were a help.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie. And so um, from that experience, I guess, you know that how I spoke to her about it and then when she came back to me with her friends and asked me to inform them, I realized that I had gotten through to her.

Timothy: Now your daughter is-is Stashia, am I pronouncing that correctly?

Angie: Yeah, Stasha.

Timothy: Stasha, sorry, um-

Angie: No, no, that’s fine. And uh it’s her birthday, it was her birthday yesterday.

Timothy: Oh, well happy birthday yesterday Stasha. How old is she?

Angie: So, uh, oh twenty six.

Timothy: Oh wonderful.

Angie: She called me yesterday and she said ‘oh Mom, thank you for having me’. I thought ‘that’s a very nice thing to say’

Timothy: Oh, I’m sure you were beaming from ear to ear.

Angie: I was! I thought-there was a big grin for quite awhile.

Timothy: Now Angie, this is one thing I-I’ve always been curious about. Um, your son, who now goes by the name Joey, uh, his birth-

Angie: No he doesn’t, his name-he uses Duncan now.

Timothy: Oh he uses Duncan, sorry. But his birth name was Zowie, Zed [sic]-o-w-I-e-

Angie: His birth name-would you like to know this or-

Timothy: Oh yeah tell the story please.

Angie: His name is Duncan Zowie Hayward Jones.

Timothy: Ah.

Angie: That is his name.

Timothy: The myth is dispelled. Now do you find that a-a-that there are a lot of stories about you that are just so wrong?

Angie: Yes! Of course there are, that’s why I don’t pay any attention. I have no interest in any of it.

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: That’s why I live here.

Timothy: Oh.

Angie: I wouldn’t live in a big city. Why?

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: Aggravated by a bunch of scumbags who don’t know me?

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: I did a-when I did the tour for Backstage Passes, I talked to redneck DJs in Texas

Timothy: Uh-huh.

Angie: They called me a whore on the air.

Timothy: Are you serious?

Angie: No, I told them, I said ‘guess what? I don’t have to do this. Fuck you’

Timothy: Yeah, of course.

Angie: Got off. Yeah, I have no interest in the bullshit and the lies, that’s-I, I’ve never been interested, I’ve never been-my area of expertise and my creativity

Timothy: Yeah.

Angie: Is writing, music, and art. I have an A level in History of Art, French, History and English. Those-that’s what I’m interested in. Also anthropology.

Timothy: And Angie, reading your writing, you-I can tell you love words.

Angie: I do

Timothy: And the way they go together, alliteration, asides that are in parentheses, it’s-it’s a joy to read.

Angie: Thank you

Timothy: Yeah

Angie: You’re so kind. I-I love it, and um, I think a lot of my being angry and behaving badly, was having that creativity interrupted by unhappiness.

Timothy: Yes.

Angie: So I-I wanted-because I had brought that up, and I didn’t wanna leave it hanging, I-I want you to know that when I say how we learn from experience.

Timothy: Mmm hmm

Angie: And I-I think you understand as a writer, I don’t really have to explain this to you, maybe I’m explaining it to your listeners. As writers, we can’t really write unless we’ve experienced. It doesn’t mean we have to go to the very depths of depravity or the very heights of ecstasy, but we have to at least have seen it or tasted it to describe it, and that experiential context for being a writer is I think what allows us to live vivid lives

[part 2 here]

#angie bowie #angela bowie #other: podcast transcript #year: 2006 #site: timothy lock's g-spot

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captainpetebradshaw · 1 year

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Movie Diary 2022

And here's my movie diary for 2022. Once again, these are the movies that I watched for the first time this year - no rewatches. And despite seeing Top Gun: Maverick a total of 17 times this year, I managed to see 113 other movies (3 more than 2021!). As always, my favorites are bolded.

1 Belle

2 Encanto

3 Don't Look Up

4 Sing 2

5 Ghostbusters: Afterlife

6 Stephen King: A Necessary Evil

7 New Gods: Nezha Reborn

8 A Hero

9 In The Heights

10 Riders of Justice

11 Shiva Baby

12 Bigbug

13 Being the Ricardos

14 Lunana: A Yak in the Classroom

15 Nightmare Alley

16 The Worst Person in the World

17 Parallel Mothers

18 The Adam Project

19 Turning Red

20 Bright Night (Nachthelle)

21 Spencer

22 Cheaper by the Dozen (2022)

23 Coda

24 The Monkey King: Reborn

25 Moonshot

26 Skyscraper

27 Dein Leben gehört mir

28 The Bubble

29 The Bad Guys

30 The Karate Kid

31 Stand by Me

32 The Karate Kid Part II

33 Uncharted

34 The Karate Kid Part III

35 The Outfit

36 The Batman

37 Everything Everywhere All at Once

38 So Close

39 Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness

40 Our Father

41 White Hot: The Rise & Fall of Ambercrombie & Fitch

42 The Tragedy of Macbeth

43 Mostly Minimalistic (Alles in bester Ordnung)

44 Official Competition

45 Licorice Pizza

46 Song Lang

47 Pariah

48 Love My Life (2006)

49 The Unbearable Wight of Massive Talent

50 Fire Island

51 Show Me Love

52 I Care a Lot

53 Top Gun

54 Benedetta

55 Top Gun: Maverick

56 Crush

57 Paris, 13th District

58 Jerry & Marge Go Large

59 Thor: Love & Thunder

60 Chip'n Dale: Rescue Rangers

61 The Bob's Burgers MOvie

62 The Sea Beast

63 The Affairs of Julia

64 Broker

65 Z-O-M-B-I-E-S 2

66 The Lost City

67 Prey

68 Decision to Leave

69 Nope

70 The Roundup

71 DC League of Super-Pets

72 Emergency Declaration

73 The Client

74 Jerry Maguire

75 Do Revenge

76 Z-O-M-B-I-E-S 3

77 Risky Business

78 Titane

79 Losin' It

80 Bodies Bodies Bodies

81 Raw

82 War Dogs

83 X

84 Black Adam

85 Valkyrie

86 Bone Tomahawk

87 Pearl

88 Ginger Snaps

89 Bros

90 The Innocents (2021)

91 See How They Run

92 Weird: The Al Yankovic Story

93 Enola Holmes 2

94 Three Thousand Years of Longing

95 Black Panther: Wakanda Forever

96 Ticket to Paradise

97 The Wonder

98 The Menu

99 Collateral

100 Cha Cha Real Smooth

101 Footloose (2011)

102 My Father's Dragon

103 Eastern Promises

104 Interview with the Vampire

105 Moon-young

106 Bullet Train

107 Oblivion

108 War of the Worlds

109 Herman Kills!

110 Troll

111 Bleed for This

112 Argentina, 1985

113 Meet the Parents

114 Meet the Fockers

115 Avatar: The Way of Water

#2022 #movie diary

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presidentabo · 1 year

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I posted 5,090 times in 2022

That's 463 more posts than 2021!

3 posts created (0%)

5,087 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@handageddon

@sergle

@grumpytrans

@curioscurio

@nnilkyway

I tagged 37 of my posts in 2022

#yall forgot that....my autism didnt let me - 2 posts

#legit tested my first name choice through pokemon and got used to he him pronouns skdnnd - 2 posts

#im now studying zoology tho - 2 posts

#and lent into a busy road to save him - 1 post

#hehe im a veggie - 1 post

#i think hes the one that fucks hannibal - 1 post

#tickets for the ark - 1 post

#book about how do we decide what to conserve - 1 post

#i do a zoology conservation degree - 1 post

#shark - 1 post

Longest Tag: 108 characters

#i will admit im lucky i have a friend to go with me and its on my uni campus and i currently get it for free

My Top Posts in 2022:

Wtf is this

0 notes - Posted November 16, 2022

Crash

0 notes - Posted April 1, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

As I near 200,000 followers here at fishingboatproceeds, I just wanted to to say Cock is one of my favorite tastes. Not only that, but balls smell amazing. It makes me go a little crazy on it to be honest. Like, I cannot get it far enough down my throat to be satisfied. I’m only satisfied when I feel those intense, powerful, salty hot pumps of cum down my throat. When I sit back on my heels, look up at you with cum all over my mouth and slobber running down my neck, hair all fucked up and wipe my mouth with the back of my arm and ask you if I did a good job and you cannot even speak because I’ve drained all of your energy out the tip of your dick..... that’s when I’m satisfied

0 notes - Posted January 31, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

0 notes

fantasy-scifi-art · 4 years

Photo

Art by Li Fengyang

#li fengyang #fengyang #Fave #Absolute Favourite #demonic green #Gallery131 #Hot Ticket 108 #Witch #Wicked Witch #green skin #throne #broomstick #Index

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princessozera · 3 years

Text

It was an accident (Asmo & Luke)

TW: MC/Reader death

GN!MC (they/them, 2nd ppov)

Word count: 1.1k

Asmo

He should have known. He should have remembered.

Asmo remembers everything about you. What your favorite scents are, which ones give you headaches. That lotion he lent you that you LOVE, but it makes your eyes water. He knew all the bands that showed up on your Hell’s Playlist when you were sad but didn’t want to talk about it, he follows your account so when he sees them pop up he gets you a cupcake and simply INSISTS that you two have a spa night and some good demonus.

He just doesn’t remember everything about humans.

Asmo BEGGED you to come to the new hot springs spa with him. You tried to talk your way out of it because of the upcoming tests, but Asmo spun it around as a treat to you for working so hard.

You both walked around, debating back and forth on which heated pool to join. Asmo thankfully avoided all of the ones tipping into the thousands, but he still had to be talked down from the ones in the 500-300* F pools. You both finally settled on one just over 108*F, and you had to admit the heat was managing to loosen up the knots in your back from looming over a desk all day.

You relaxed in the pool, happily listening to Asmo chat about how difficult it was to get tickets to this opening night, the restaurant had this great steak you two should try afterwards.... You haven’t been this chill in so long, so you could already feel Asmo’s chipper voice lulling you to sleep. You two were about to get out, but a group of Asmo’s friends and admirers arrived, and Asmo convinced you to stay, offering to prop you up so you could fall asleep without trouble in the pool.

Asmo didn’t notice how much time had passed, catching up with his friends always felt timeless to him. He did notice when your body became a bit limp, making sure to put his arm under you and keep your head on his shoulder, above water. His friends even commenting on the cute blush you had on your face.

It was over an hour later when his friends left, and you were still soundly asleep, but Asmo was starting to get wrinkly, so it was about time to get out.

He called your name, in an almost sing-song tone, nuzzling against your head. Asmo must have underestimated how stressed you’ve been with exams, because you were still out like a light. He decided to tease you, putting little kisses on your eyelids and forehead before gently shaking you, calling your name again.

Oh, okay, ugh. MC, this wasn’t cute anymore. It’s like trying to wake Belphie. He raises his voice, shaking you a bit more harshly now, but you slip out of his grip and become fully submerged, but even then you don’t wake up.

Asmo’s panicking now, taking you out of the pool and putting you on the cold stones, yelling for help, demanding someone call Lucifer. Here, out of the heat, your body temperature quickly dropped, and you refused to stir, no matter how desperately Asmo cried out your name.

You weren’t asleep, not anymore.

Luke

Luke was quickly becoming a master pastry chef under Barbato’s guidance, and just like Barbatos, he pushed himself by learning to cook with unique ingredients from all 3 realms.

It was another Saturday in Purgatory hall’s kitchen; you were watching Luke bake, talking about classes and listening to him explain the intricacies of cooking with the different ingredients, and how the Devildom’s climate affected this type of dish specifically. Simeon had gone off with Solomon in search for inspiration for supper, so it was a very calm baking session.

Luke also spent a good 10 minutes or so explaining how difficult it had been to get this specific ingredient from the Celestial Realm, Simeon had to call in a few favors to get it down here and today was the only day Luke could cook it, if he wanted to get the peak flavor of it!

You watched as he meticulously cut, measured, mixed, and poured his creation. You could have sworn he was even sweating a bit. Since this was the first recipe Luke himself had created, you can imagine there was a bit of stress to get it just right.

Luke tells you about how sweet, soft, and, almost bouncy with lightness he hopes this cake comes out, so while he’s cleaning up, you whip up a batch of lemonade, to both celebrate his undoubtedly marvelous cake, but also to have the acidity cut some of the sweetness afterwards.

After baking, you didn’t have to wait long in anticipation. The cake cooled quickly, and Luke decorated it with a simple, clean layer of whipped frosting.

He cut you both a big slice and you dig in, the flavors were nothing short of divine. Luke tells you about the Celestial star fruit, naturally silver in color, but the inside was a pastel pink shade! It was a fruit that only grew for 3 months of the year; there was only one orchid in all of the Celestial Realm, but it produced enough fruit for every home to have 4-6 pieces of fruit for their holiday season.

Luke was so excited to tell you everything about the history of this fruit, and maybe even angelic holidays, that he didn’t notice how your face began to twist in confusion. He didn’t notice your struggle to swallow, cheeks blotchy red as you down the entire glass of lemonade, trying to get your throat to open up.

He finally notices when you cough out a weak “Luke?” before you tripped off your bar chair, wheezing, and scratching at your throat. Luke is stunned, still behind the counter, shaking uncontrollably. He fumbles for his phone, wanting to comfort you, but he’s as terrified as the night Lucifer tried to kill him.

What was wrong with you? What happened? Simeon’s voice came over the phone, asking what was wrong, yelling, but it sounded far away in Luke’s mind, he didn’t even realize he’d managed to dial Simeon’s number. His voice shook, borderline hysterical as he tried to tell Simeon that something was wrong, passing out and dropping to the floor himself when your twitching stopped.

Did you know that angels don’t have any food allergies?

#obey me #obey me shall we date #omswd lucifer #omswd mammon #omswd satan #omswd asmo #omswd asmodeus #omswd luke #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me luke #om luke #om asmo #om asmodeus #I have every intention of writing for all thr brothers #time just got away from me and i realy want to put this out #also if i wrote the food allergies bit off or a bit too descriptively to not have a tag please let me know #last time i had really bad food allergies was like when i was 10 #it was not a good time

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cardest · 3 years

Text

San Francisco playlist

San Francisco - my favorite city in the world! The bands, the music, the songs are all here, in this playlist I created. I threw in a bit of Sac and went south by San Jose, Monterrey and up past Sausalito. Can we make it to 250 songs? Let me know what bands/songs I left out.

Have I left out a song or a band in this San Francisco playlist? Let me know! Cheers!

Play the songs here at this link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1-HLG9q5rZLsqs8EYh6bhu- San Francisco

001 The Dillinger Escape Plan w/Mike Patton - When Good Dogs Do Bad Things 002 Night flight Orchestra - California Morning 003 Quincy Jones - Call Me Mister Tibbs OST (Main Title) 004 James Taylor Quartet - Dirty Harry theme song 005 Faith No More - Seperation anxiety 006 Streets of San Francisco TV show theme song 007 Santana - Evil Ways 008 High on Fire - Electric Messiah 009 Metallica - Disposable Heroes 010 Hammers Of Misfortune - Dead Revolution 011 Buddy Guy - Hello San Francisco 012 Faith No More - Jungle 013 Isaac Hayes - Shaft 014 Orange Peels - Back In San Francisco 015 Idris Ackamoor and the Pyramids - Message To My People 016 Thee Oh Sees - The Dream 017 Merle Haggard - Here In Frisco 018 Audrey Horne - California 019 Journey - Lights 020 Death Angel - Hatred United / United Hate 021 Mel Tor Me - Got The Date On The Golden Gate 022 Duke Ellington - Tourist Point Of View 023 Sons of Anarchy - This Life (Sons of Anarchy Theme Song) 024 Larry Graham's Central Station - Earthquake 025 LARD - I Wanna Be A Drug Sniffing Dog 026 Machine Head - California Bleeding 027 Neurosis - The Doorway 028 KING WOMAN - Utopia 029 Lalo Schifrin - Magnum Force OST Main Title 030 Forbidden - Adapt Or Die 031 DBUK - In San Francisco Bay 032 Jack Name - Werewolf Factory 033 John Carpenter - Theme from "The Fog" 034 Khiis - Saboor 035 Richie Havens - San Francisco Bay Blues 036 Metallica - Battery 037 Autopsy - charred remains 038 ExTREMITY_-_Crepuscular_Crescendo 039 The Otherside - Streetcar 040 Quincy Jones - Ironside (TV Theme) 041 Megadeth - Back in the Day 042 Sly and the Family Stone - Stand! 043 Faith No More - From Out of Nowhere 044 Willie Hutch-Vampin (The Mack OST 045 Orchid - Mouths Of Madness 046 Lalo Schifrin - Bullitt OST - On The Way To San Mateo 047 Vince Guaraldi - Woodstock's Dream 048 Fantomas - 4-11-05 049 Violation Wound - Fearmonger + State of Alarm 050 Primus - Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweekers 051 The Flower Pot Men - Let's Go to San Francisco (Part.1-2) 052 Bosse-de-Nage - Crux 053 Rod McKuen - The Beat Generation 054 Dionne Warwick - Do You Know The Way To San Jose 055 The Watchers - Sabbath Highway 056 Possessed - the eyes of horror 057 Scott McKenzie – San Francisco (Be Sure to wear flowers) 058 Tower Of Power - Oakland Stroke 059 Big Trouble In Little China OST - Pork chop express 060 Vio-lence - Calling In The Coroner 061 Black Oak Arkansas - The Big Ones Still Coming 062 Mr. Bungle - Love Is a Fist 063 VUUR - The Fire - San Francisco 064 Testament - The Haunting 065 Electronicat - Frisco Bay 066 Y&T - Mean Streak 067 Thee Oh Sees - Toe Cutter/Thumb Buster 068 Sweet - California Nights - Promo Clip (OFFICIAL) 069 Sadus - Swallowed In Black 070 Chuck Berry - San Francisco Dues 071 Sammy Hagar - Keep on rockin' 072 Fuzz - Sleigh Ride 073 Otis Redding - Sittin' on The Dock of the Bay 074 Pleasure Leftits - The Gate 075 BL'AST - Sometimes 076 Santana - Samba de Sausalito 077 Acephalix - Upon This Altar 078 Sun Ra - Lady With The Golden Stockings 079 Chris Isaak - San Francisco Days 080 Pointer Sisters - How Long (Betcha' Got A Chick On The Side) 081 High On Fire - Carcosa 082 Will Haven - When The Walls Close In 083 The Coup - Laugh/Love/Fuck 084 King Khan - Teeth Are Shite 085 Deafheaven - Irresistible 086 Glitter Wizard - Blood of the Serpent 087 Jefferson Airplane - It's No Secret 088 Cannonball Adderley - This Here 089 The Warlocks - Can't Come Down 090 Squirmy Sax Man - I Still Believe 091 Acid King - Coming Down from Outer Space 092 George Duke - Sausalito 093 The Lost Boys - Cry Little Sister (Theme From The Lost Boys OST) 094 Betty Davis - [They Say I'm Different] He Was a Big Freak 095 Fever Tree - San Francisco Girls 096 The Dillinger Escape Plan w/ Mike Patton - Pig Latin 097 Build Them to Break - Lucky Strike 098 Montrose - Rock Candy 099 PRIMUS - THE TOYS GO WINDING DOWN 100 Joe Satriani - Big Bad Moon 101 Sleater Kinney - Jumpers 102 GRUESOME - Dimensions Of Horror 103 Sly & the Family Stone - Everday People 104 Huey Lewis and the News - Back in Time 105 Hammers Of Misfortune - 2 17th Street 106 Jerry Fielding - Prologue _ Main Title (The Enforcer OST) 107 Metal Church - The Dark 108 Deftones - Ohms 109 John Lee Hooker - Frisco Blues 110 DRI - Go Die 111 16th & Valencia Roxy Music- Devendra Banhart, What We Will Be 112 MC Hammer - Too Legit to Quit 113 Dead Kennedys-Police Truck 114 Rancid - Adina 115 San Francisco's Shiver - Up My Sleeve 116 Bernard Herrmann - Vertigo OST - The Bay 117 Faith No More - Last Cup Of Sorrow 118 Blackburn & Snow - Stranger In a Strange Land 119 The Doobie Brothers - What A Fool Believes 120 The Grateful Dead - Sugar Magnolia 121 Cab Calloway - San Francisco Fan 122 The Charlatans - codine 123 Buck Owens - Want To Live In San Francisco 124 Sleep - Dragonaut 125 Death Angel - 5 Steps Of Freedom 126 Neil Young - Heart of Gold 127 Vastum - Reveries in Autophagia 128 Dead Kennedys - Moon Over Marin 129 EchoBrain - Colder World 130 Riz Ortolani - Lombard Street 131 Waylon Jennings - San Francisco Mabel Joy 132 Con Funk Shun - Confunkshunizeya 133 Chic - Hes the Greatest Dancer 134 Peace Creep - Radio Free Alcatraz 135 ABBA - Santa Rosa 136 Brian Wilson and Van Dyke Parks - San Fransisco 137 Together Band - California Curl California Girl 138 The Hellers - It's 74 In San Francisco 139 Pat Todd - No Place Like Home 140 Nancy Wilson - I'm Always Drunk In San Francisco (And I Don't Drink At All) 141 Anathema - San Francisco 142 Blue Cheer - Fool 143 Exhumed - Gravewalker 144 Darondo - Let My People Go 145 Exodus - Blood In Blood Out 146 Lalo Schifrin Dirty Harry OST - Scorpios Theme 147 Johnny Cash - Folsom Prison Blues 148 Wild Light - California on my mid 149 Herbie Hancock - Man-child - Hang Up Your Hang Ups 150 Fantomas - Spider Baby 151 The Lord Weird Slough Feg - Headhunter 152 The Animals - San Franciscan Nights 153 Twilight - Dance with Me 154 THE POINTER SISTERS - Yes We Can Can 155 Residents - Hello Skinny 156 CCR HEADCLEANER - Eat This Riff 157 LEON WARE - Thats Why I Came To California 158 Creedence Clearwater Revival - I Put A Spell On You 159 Comorant - The First Man 160 Bosse-de-Nage - The Trench 161 Hell Fire - Free Again 162 Riz Ortolani - Golden Gate Bridge 163 Fleetwood Mac - You Make Loving Fun 164 Uther Pendragon - San Francisco Earthquake 165 Melvins - Zodiac 166 La Luz - California Finally 167 The Wyatt Act - Push 168 Santana - Soul Sacrifice 169 Cheap Trick - On the Radio 170 Electric Wizard - Venus In Furs 171 Led Zeppelin - Misty Mountain Hop 172 Tommy Castro - Callin' San Francisco 173 Viscious Rumors - Digital Dictator 174 Ghoul-Off With Their Heads 175 Diesel - Sausalito Summernight (Single Version) 176 Sheila E - A Love Bizarre 177 Starship - Nothings Gonna Stop Us Now 178 Jeffry Osboune - I Really Don't Need No Light 179 Nazareth - Alcatraz 180 Freak of Nature - Rescue Me 181 Metallica - Crash Course In Brain Surgery 182 10000 Maniacs - Hey Jack Kerouac 183 Faith No More - Get Out 184 URSA - Wizard's Path 185 Jefferson Airplane - Aerie (Gang of Eagles) 186 Tower of Power - Just Enough and Too Much 187 Fred Hughes - san francisco is a lonely town 188 Mamaleek - Eating Unblessed Meat 189 Moby Grape - Naked If I Want To 190 Exodus - Metal Command 191 Pig Destroyer - Alcatraz Metaphors 192 the Donnas - You Make Me Hot 193 Hot Tuna - True Religion 194 Heathen - Opiate of the Masses 195 Fanny - Come and Hold Me 196 Sadus - Hands Of Fate 197 Negative Trend - Meathouse 198 Forbidden - Forbidden Evil 199 Spazz - Crush Kill Destroy 200 Testament - The Preacher 201 HEXX - Morbid Reality 202 Vio-Lence - Phobophobia 203 Dead Kennedys - One Way Ticket To Pluto 204 Tom Waits - Get Behind The Mule 205 CRETIN - It 206 RAMONES - Judy Is A Punk 207 Full House - Intro 208 Willie Alexander and the Boom Boom Band - Kerouac 209 Primus - Dirty Drowning Man 210 Wooden Shjips - Motorbike 211 The Tony Williams Lifetime Ego - Clap City 212 Middle of the Road - Sacramento (A Wonderful Town) 213 Green Day - At the Library 214 Slayer - Gemini 215 Tetema - Cutlass Eye 216 Defiance - Death Machine 217 Brisco County Jr theme 218 Doug McKechnie - Crazy Ray 219 Ulthar - Furnace Hibernation 220 Mr. Bungle - ANARCHY UP YOUR ANUS 221 Dirty Ghosts - Let It Pretend 222 They Might Be Giants - San Francisco (In Situ) 223 Metallica - The Shortest Straw 224 OM - Unitive Knowledge of the Godhead 225 Laaz Rockit - City's Gonna Burn 226 Autopsy - Skullptures 227 Mordred - Spectacle of Fear 228 Sly & the Family Stone - Luv N' Haight 229 Possessed - Seven Churches 230 Machine Head - The Rage to Overcome 231 Thelonius Monk - San Francisco Holiday 232 The Units - The Mission Is Bitchin 233 Del Tha Funkee Homosapien - Mistadobalina 234 Arnocorps - Dead lift 235 The Grateful Dead - The Golden Road 236 DRI - All for nothing 237 Jim Martin - Disco dust 238 Thee Oh Sees - I come from the mountain 239 Death Angel - Discontinued 240 Starship - We Built This City 241 Captured! by Robots - Endless Circle of Bullshit 242 Pins Of Light - My revenge 243 Sun Ra - We Travel the Spaceways 244 Faith No More - caffeine 245 David Lee Roth - Just like paradise 246 San Francisco Fog Horns by Golden Gate Bridge 247 Abscess - Tormented 248 Mortuous - Bitterness 249 Dead Kennedy's - California uber alles 250 Twitch Angry - San Francisco 666 Neurosis - Water Is Not Enough

So, hop on a cable car, grab ice cream at Swenson’s or bark back at the seals down by Pier 39. Catch a Bear’s game at Berkeley and do some squirmy sax moves in the Haight after you down some beers at the Toronado and play my San Fran playlist! Here are the songs in the link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-iHPcxymC1-HLG9q5rZLsqs8EYh6bhu-

#san francisco #san francisco playlist #Bay Area Thrash #haightashbury #high on fire #jello biafra #sun ra #metallica #mike patton #exodus #captured! by robots #om #jack kerouac #oakland #neurosis

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nostalgiaispeace · 3 years

Text

2232.

1. What is your favorite shade of blue? dark 2. When’s the last time you bought something just because? lol never 3. What Ozzy lyric describes you best? - 4. When was the last time you went for a walk without a specific destination in mind? idk 5. Do you daydream? always

6. What was your last daydream about? well i’m not telling thei nternet 7. Ever won the lottery? lol no 8. How much did you get for your high school graduation? i don’t remember 9. What was the most important decision you made that screwed up your life the most? idk 10. Do you know what your Chinese horoscope is? hmmm i might 11. What is love really about? nothing i can describe right now while i’m exhausted 12. What’s the most you ever made in a year? lol 13. Do you have an online diary? no 14. What’s the biggest pot you’ve won in poker? I’ve never played poker. 15. What’s your most prized possession? my frog 16. What Metallica lyric most describes your life? - 17. Ever been to Ozzfest? no 18. How many concerts have you been to? a lot 19. Which one was your favorite? lana del rey 20. What shade of purple most describes your feelings right now? none 21. Pick a shade of a color. Now describe it to me and name it. light 22. Sun tea or brewed tea? brewed 23. What’s the most illegal thing you’ve done? drugs 24. Ever get busted by the cops? What for? No. 25. What’s under your bed? my cat 26. Vacuum or dustbuster? Vacuum. 27. How many people are on your buddy list? lol 28. How many pairs of rollerblades do/did you own? none 29. Ever wear out a CD? What was it? yeah. britney spears 30. What’s your favorite card game? solitare 31. Who was the most annoying person you’ve talked to on the phone? idk 32. What’s your favorite fast food meal? chick fil a nuggets and mac and cheese 33. Where is the best restaurant you’ve ever eaten in at? idk 34. Lamb chops or pork chops? Neither. 35. How many roses have you received/given? idk 36. When’s the last time you mowed the lawn? years ago 37. Washed your car? years ago 38. Ever have a tornado in your town? not since i’ve lived here — 40. What state is your wardrobe in? fine 41. What’s the last article of clothing you bought? sweats 42. How many trash cans can you see right now? One. 43. If you HAD to pick ONE song to listen to for the rest of your life, and that would be the only song you ever heard, what would it be? I don’t know. 44. Ever heard of Shinedown? Yeah. 45. They rock, don’t they? sure 46. What size is your bed? queen 47. When’s the last time you had pigs in a blanket? not that long ago actually 48. Have you ever painted the ceilings in your home? no 49. What does your lawn furniture consist of? lawn chairs 50. Ever live off of canned soup and ramen noodles for weeks at a time? no 51. What flavor of jelly are you? strawberry 52. Ever take any of those online personality quizzes? yeah 53. What musical group/artist do you love, but hide from other people? none 54. What’s on the floor in your bedroom? Nothing. 55. What is the first meal you remember eating? idk 56. Ever been to a drive in? no 57. What was the first movie you ever saw? i don’t remember 56. What’s in your keepsake box/scrapbook? so many things 57. Describe your first date. idk 58. Would you recognize most of your classmates 5 years after graduation? sure 59. What percentile of your class were you in? I have no idea. 60. When was the last time it rained while the sun was shining? I don’t recall. 61. What did you score on your SATs? i don’t remember 62. When was the last time you saw a rainbow? it’s been a bit 63. Name your favorite artist/song from before 1990. zeppelin 64. Do you think there should be new genres of music to encompass some of the newer rock performers out now? no 65. What colors is your lava lamp? - 66. What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever hung on the wall? I haven’t hung up anything strange. 67. When’s the last time you did laundry? todayy 68. How many hammers do you own? one 69. Can you name every place you’ve ever had sex? yes 70. How many speakers are in your bedroom? none 71. DVD or VHS? dvd 72. What’s the most important thing you ever lost and never found again? idk 73. What forms of birth control have you used? pill and implant 74. How many webpages have you created, and can you still find them all? no 75. You have .30 in two coins. One of them is not a nickel. What are they? uh 76. What’s your pet peeve when cleaning the house? um all of it 77. Do you use sponges or dishcloths when doing the dishes? sponges 78. How many people are in your family portrait? three 79. How many times have you moved? too many times 80. Handcuffs or rope :D? Neither. 81. What season best describes your temperament? winter 82. What’s the last thing you had to drink? diet coke 83. Ever been so drunk you blacked out? no 84. What’s your favorite song on the top twenty right now? idk. 85. What do your light fixtures look like? uh normal 86. How many jobs have you held for more than a month? 4 87. Ever punched a wall? yes 88. When’s the last time you really lost your temper? It’s been a long time. 89. How do you cope? i cry 90. What’s your antidrug? idk 91. Ever grown any plants before? What were they? Nope. 92. Ever own a director chair? No. 93. When was the last time you camped out? when i was a kid 94. Went swimming? years ago 95. Went fishing? lol 96. Oust or Glade and why? Glade. 97. Ever thought you (or a girlfriend) were pregnant, but it was a false alarm? yes 98. If 97 is yes, were you glad or sad? well i was pregnant so i was happy 99. Do you have a red-eye mouse or one with a ball? none 100. What do your doorstops look like? - 101. What was the last conversation you had with someone before they died? i don’t remember 102. What do your drinking glasses look like? they’re just solid colors 103. How many bottles/containers are in your medicine cabinet? a lot 104. How many funerals have you been to? a lot 105. How many states have you been to? a lot

106. What was the last bug you killed and what did you use? a wasp 107. What does your country need right now? sanity 108. Are you creative? not really 109. How so? – 110. How many computers in your household? Two. 111. Ever help to solve a crime? No. 112. Who is in the picture frame on your bedside table? - 113. How many CDs does your player hold? - 114. What is one thing you’d like to do before you die? go to england 115. Do the good die young or do they die before they have a chance to be bad? um both suck 116. What’s your favorite totally cliche’ saying? everything happens for a reason 117. Ever go out of your way to exact revenge on someone? no 118. Was it worth it? - 119. Ever get pulled over by the cops and get away without a ticket? no 120. What’s the weather like right now? HOT 121. What was your first legal alcoholic drink? vodka 122. Do you have a door/doorknob to your room? Yes. 123. Name one thing you regret? lol so many 124. Ever get published by one of those poetry groups? no 125. What’s the furthest distance you’ve moved? states away 126. How many friends from high school/college do you still talk to? a few

127. Where is your home/heart right now? here 128. What’s the most expensive things your parents ever bought you? idk 129. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve bought? my car 130. How many hangers are in your closet? a lot 131. If you died right now, would you feel cheated or happy? happy 132. How many times did you intentionally start to commit suicide? a few 133. Ever spent the night in the “loony bin?” yes 134. What’s wrong with society? lol so much 135. How many crazy ice cream trucks are in your area? none really 136. What is your favorite cover song? i have a lot 137. Does the weather ever seem to reflect your mood eerily? no 138. Are you more psychic than most people? lol no 139. What’s your inspiration? my daughter 140. What’s the longest relationship you’ve been in? the one i’m in now for 8 years 141. Did you ever drop out of school? college 142. Ever raise a child that wasn’t your own for more than 3 months? No. 143. What is your favorite piece of jewelry? wedding band 144. Ever help someone cheat on someone else? ew no 145. Are you a cheater too? No. 146. What was the last dessert type food you’ve eaten? candy 147. Fill in the blank: I’m a ________aholic. Coffeeholic. 148. When’s the last time you went to a hairdresser/salon? february 149. Strangest medical procedure ever performed on you? nothing strange 150. Do you own any appliances? yes 151. Do you have an “egg crate” on your bed? no 153. Last time you went to the laundromat? idk 154. How many hinges are on your front door? I’m not sure. 155. Can I be done yet? yes

#me #survey

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filmnoirfoundation · 4 years

Photo

¡Viva México! #NoirCity18 dedicates today to Mexican noir. Both our matinée and evening screenings will be double bills of Mexican films: ANOTHER DAWN (1:30) & TWILIGHT(3:40) and NIGHT FALLS (LA NOCHE AVANZA), 7:30 PM & SALÓN MÉXICO, 9:15 PM.

Films introduced by FNF prez and NOIR ALLEY presenter Eddie Muller.

Festival line-up and tickets available at www.NoirCity.com

All films screen at San Francisco’s historic Castro Theatre.

Saturday, February 1, 2020

Matinée

Mexico

1:30 PM

ANOTHER DAWN DISTINTO AMANECER

A chance encounter plunges former lovers into the steamy underworld of Mexico City. Featuring visual magic courtesy of DP Gabriel Figueroa.

35mm print

Spanish with English subtitles

1943, Mexico. 108 min. Dir. Julio Bracho

3:40 PM

TWILIGHT

CREPÚSCULO

A surgeon's life spirals into romantic obsession when he is enraptured by a gorgeous artist's model. Hallucinatory, hot-blooded melodrama!

35mm print Spanish with English subtitles

1945, Mexico. 108 min. Dir. Julio Bracho

Saturday, February 1, 2020

Evening

Mexico

7:30 PM

NIGHT FALLS

LA NOCHE AVANZA

A champion athlete is a world-class cad; which of his many lovers and rivals will finally do him in? Classic noir by the great Roberto Gavaldón.

Digital presentation

Spanish with English subtitles

9:15 PM

SALÓN MÉXICO

A dancer at a notorious Mexico City club must stand up to her pimp to save her younger sister. Perhaps the ultimate example of cabaretera noir.

Digital presentation Spanish with English subtitles

1949, Mexico. 95 min. Dir. Emilio Fernández

#NoirCity18 #noir city #mexican noir #mexican cinema #eddie muller #tcm #noir alley #salon mexico #la noche avanza #CREPÚSCULO #distinto amanecer #castro theatre

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way-down-meme-town · 4 years

Text

Hadestown Act I Sentence Meme

Under the cut you will find 212 lyrics from the first act of the musical Hadestown to use for your enjoyment!

Road To Hell 1. “Once upon a time there was a railroad line.”

2. “Don’t ask where, brother, don’t ask when.”

3. “It was the road to Hell. It was hard times.”

4. “It was a world of gods and men.”

5. “It’s an old song. It’s an old tale from way back when.”

6. “It’s an old song and we’re gonna sing it again.”

7. “We got some gods in the house tonight!”

8. “See, on the road to Hell there was a railroad line.”

9. “They was always singin’ in the back of your mind.”

10. “Everybody, meet the Fates.”

11. “If you ride that train to the end of the line where the sun don’t shine and it’s always shady, it’s there you’ll find the king of the mine.”

12. “Someone’s got to tell the tale whether or not it turns out well.”

13. “Not everyone gets to be a god.”

14. “Don’t forget that times are hard.”

15. “This boy was a muse’s son.”

16. “You might say the boy was touched, ‘cause he was touched by the gods themselves.”

17. “There was one more soul on this road.”

18. “Girl, come on in from the cold.”

19. “Thus begins the tale of Orpheus and Eurdyice.”

20. “It’s a tale of love from long ago.”

Any Way The Wind Blows 21. “She was no stranger to the world, no stranger to the wind.”

22. “The weather ain’t the way it was before. Ain’t no spring or fall anymore.”

23. “There ain’t a thing that you can do when the weather takes a turn on you, ‘cept for hurry up and hit the road.”

24. “People turn on you just like the wind.”

25. “Everybody is a fair weather friend. In the end, you’re better off alone.”

26. “When you’re hungry and there ain’t enough to go around, ain’t no length to which a girl won’t go.”

27. “Sometimes you think you would do anything to fill your belly full of food.”

28. “You know how those muses are, sometimes they abandon you.”

29. “This poor boy, he wore his heart out on his sleeve.”

30. “You might say he was naive to the ways of the world.”

31. “I liked to hear him sing and his way of seeing things, so I took him underneath my wing.”

Come Home With Me 32. “You wanna talk to her?”

33. “Don’t come on too strong.”

34. “Come home with me.”

35. “Is he always like this?”

36. “Your name is like a melody.”

37. “A singer? Is that what you are?”

38. “Oh, a liar and a player too? I’ve met too many men like you.”

39. “He’s not like any man you’ve met.”

40. “I’m working on a song, a song. It isn’t finished yet, but when it’s done and when I sing it, spring will come again.”

41. “Spring will come.”

42. “I haven’t seen a spring or fall since…I can’t recall.”

43. “That’s what I’m working on, a song to fix what’s wrong. Take what’s broken, make it whole.”

44. “Oh, he’s crazy. Why would I become his wife?”

45. “He’ll make you feel alive.”

Wedding Song 46. “Lover, tell me if you can, who’s gonna buy the wedding bands?”

47. “Times being what they are, hard and getting harder all the time.”

48. “Lover, when I sing my song, all the rivers’ll sing along.”

49. “The rivers gonna give us the wedding bands.”

50. “Lover, tell me if you can, who’s gonna lay the wedding table?”

51. “Times being what they are, dark and getting darker all the time.”

52. “Lover, when I sing my song all the trees gonna sing along.”

53. “The trees gonna lay the wedding table.”

54. “So when you sing your song, the one you’re working on, spring will come again?”

55. “You wanna take me home? Sing the song.”

56. “Lover, tell me when we’re wed, who’s gonna make the wedding bed?”

57. “Lover, when I sing my song, all the birds gonna sing along.”

Epic I 58. “Where’d you get that melody?”

59. “It came to me as if I’d known it all along.”

60. “It’s an old song, a song of love from long ago. Long time since I heard it though.”

61. “You’ve heard that melody before?”

62. “Remember the tale I told you once about the gods?”

63. “Remember how it used to be? Their love made the world go round.”

64. “Hades was king of the underworld, but he fell in love with a beautiful lady who walked up above in her mothers green field.”

65. “He took her home to become his queen where the sun never shone on anyone.”

66. “The Gods sang his song of love and the world sang it with them.”

67. “That was long ago, before we were on this road.”

Livin It Up On Top 68. “On the road to hell there was a lot of waiting.”

69. “These days she never stays for long, but good things come to those who wait.”

70. “Well it’s like he said, I’m an outdoor girl.”

71. “She forgot a little thing called spring.”

72. “Are you wondering where I’ve been?”

73. “Been to hell and back again.”

74. “Like my mama always said: when you’re down, you’re down and when you’re up, you’re up.”

75. “If you ain’t six feet underground, you’re living it up on top.”

76. “Let’s not talk about hard times. Pour the wine, it’s summertime!”

77. “Who makes the summer sun shine bright?”

78. “Who makes the fruit of the vine get ripe?”

79. “Who makes the flowers bloom again, in spite of a man?”

80. “Let me tell you something that my mama said to me: you take what you can get and you make the most of it.”

81. “It was summertime on the road to hell.”

82. “You might say it was in spite of herself.”

83. “For a moment there, the world came back to life.”

84. “Let the poet bless this round.”

85. “To the patroness of all of this, Persephone, who has finally returned to us with wine enough to share.”

86. “If no one takes too much, there will always be enough.”

87. “She will always fill our cups and we will always raise them up to the world we dream about, and the one we live in now.”

88. “Livin’ it up and we ain’t gonna stop.”

All I’ve Ever Known (Intro) 89. “He had a gift to give. He could make you see how the world could be in spite of the way that it is.”

90. “She’d seen how the world was. When she fell, she fell in spite of herself.”

All I’ve Ever Known 91. “I was alone so long I didn’t even know that I was lonely.”

92. “Out in the cold so long I didn’t even know that I was cold.”

93. “All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own.”

94. “All I’ve ever known is how to hold my own, but now I wanna hold you too.”

95. “You take me in your arms and suddenly there’s sunlight all around me.”

96. “I don’t wanna go back to the lonely life.”

97. “I don’t know how or why or who I am that I should get to hold you.”

98. “When I saw you all alone against the sky, it’s like I’d known you all along.”

99. “I know you before we met and I don’t even know you yet, all I know is you’re someone I have always known.”

100. “Now I wanna hold you close. I don’t wanna ever have to let you go.”

101. “Say that you’ll hold me forever. Say that the wind won’t change on us.”

102. “Say that we’ll stay with each other and it will always be like this.”

103. “The wind will never change on us as long as we stay with each other.”

Way Down Hadestown 104. “That was not six months!”

105. “Better go and get your suitcase packed. Guess it’s time to go.”

106. “She’s gonna ride that train til the end of the line.”

107. “Did you ever wonder what it’s like on the underside?”

108. “You either get to hell or to Hadestown, ain’t no difference anymore.”

109. “Everybody tryin’ to get a ticket to go, but those who go they don’t come back.”

110. “Down there it’s a bunch of stiffs. Brother, I’ll be board to death.”

111. “Takes a lot of medicine to make it through the winter time.”

112. “All them shiny little heads and tails, where do you think they come from?”

113. “Everybody shines by the sweat of his brow.”

114. “The wage is nothing and the work is hard.”

115. “It’s a graveyard in Hadestown.”

116. “Mr. Hades is a mean old boss!”

117. “An eye for an eye! A lie for a lie!”

118. “You better forget about your wishing well.”

119. “I missed ya.”

120. “Mr. Hades is a mighty king.”

121. “Must be making some might big deals. Seems like he owns everything.”

122. “Kind of makes you wonder how it feels.”

A Gathering Storm 123. “He came too soon. He came for her too soon. It’s not supposed to be like this.”

124. “Well, til someone brings the world back into tune this is how it is.”

125. “Touched by the gods is what he is.”

126. “Finish it quick. The wind is changing. There’s a storm coming on.”

Epic II 127. “Hades is king of oil and coal and the riches that flow where the rivers are found.”

128. “His loneliness moves in him crude and black.”

129. “He thinks of his wife in the arms of the sun.”

130. “Jealousy fuels him and finds him and fills him.”

Chant 131. “Low. Keep your head low.”

132. “You gotta keep your heard low if you wanna keep your head.”

133. “In the coldest time of year, why is it so hot down here?”

134. “Lover, you were gone so long. Lover, I was lonesome.”

135. “When you feel that fire, think of it as my desire.”

136. “I am keeping one eye on the sky and tryin’ to trust that the song he’s working on is gonna shelter us from the wind.”

137. “In the darkest time of year, why is it so bright down here?”

138. “When you see that glare, think of it as my despair.”

139. “His black gold flows in the world down below and her dark clouds roll in the one above.”

140. “That’s why times are so hard. It’s because of the gods.”

141. “The gods have forgotten the song of their love.”

142. “I’m trying to believe that the song he’s working on is gonna harbor me from the wind.”

143. “Did you think I’d be impressed with this neon necropolis?”

144. “Everything I do, I do it for the love of you.”

145. “If you don’t even want my love, I’ll give it so someone who does. Someone grateful for her fate, someone who appreciates the comforts of a gilded cage.”

146. “Think of them as my embrace of you.”

Hey Little Songbird 147. “Hey little songbird, give me a song.”

148. “I’m a busy man and I can’t stay long. I got clients to call. I got orders to fill.”

149. “I got walls to build. I got riots to quell.”

150. “They’re giving me hell back in Hades.”

151. “Hey, little songbird, cat got your tongue?”

152. “Always a pity for one so pretty and young when poverty comes to clip your wings and knock the wind right out of your lungs.”

153. “Nobody sings on empty.”

154. “Strange is the call of this strange man.”

155. “You’d shine like a diamond dark in the mine.”

156. “The choice is yours if you’re willing to choose, seeing as you’ve got nothing to lose.”

157. “Wasn’t it gonna be the two of us? Weren’t we birds of a feather?”

158. “Let me guess. He’s some kind of poet and he’s penniless.”

159. “Give him your hand, he’ll give you his hand-to-mouth.”

160. “He’ll write you a poem when the power is out.”

161. “See how the vipers and vultures surround you. They’ll take you down, they’ll pick you clean.”

162. “People get mean when the chips are down.”

When The Chips Are Down 163. “Life ain’t easy. Life ain’t fair. A girls gotta fight for he rightful share.”

164. “What you gonna do when the chips are down?”

165. “Help yourself, to hell with the rest. Even the one who loves you best.”

166. “Take it if you can, give if you must. Ain’t nobody but yourself to trust.”

167. “Aim for the heart, shoot to kill. If you don’t do it then the other one will.”

168. “The first shall be first and the last shall be last.”

169. “Cast your eyes to heaven, you get a knife in the back.”

170. “Nobody’s innocent now that the chips are down.”

Gone, I’m Gone 171. “My heart is yours, always was and will be. It’s my gut I can’t ignore.”

172. “My heart it aches to stay, but the flesh will have its way.”

173. “The way is dark and long. I’m already gone.”

174. “Go ahead and lay the blame. Talk of virtue, talk of sin.”

175. “Wouldn’t you have done the same in her shoes, in her skin?”

176. “You can have your principles when you’ve got a belly full, but hunger has a way with you.”

177. “There’s no telling what you’re gonna do when the chips are down.”

Wait For Me (Intro) 178. “Hey, the big artiste! Ain’t you working on your masterpiece?”

179. “What do you care? You’ll find another muse somewhere.”

180. “Wherever she is is where I’ll go.”

181. “What if I said she’s down below?”

182. “She called your name before she went, but I guess you weren’t listening.”

183. “Just how far would you go for her?”

184. “Course there is another way, but nah, I ain’t supposed to say.”

185. “It ain’t for the sensitive of soul. So do you really wanna go?”

186. “With all your heart? Well, that’s a start.”

Wait For Me 187. “You have to take the long way down, through the underground under cover of night.”

188. “Ain’t no compass, ain’t no map. Just a telephone wire and a railroad track.”

189. “Wait for me, I’m comin’.”

190. “If all you got is your own two legs, just be glad you got ‘em.”

191. “Who are you to think that you can walk a road that no one ever walked before?”

192. “You’re on the lam, you’re on the run. Don’t give your name, you don’t have one.”

193. “Don’t look no one in the eye.”

194. “That town’ll try to suck you dry.”

195. “They’ll pluck the heart right out your chest.”

196. “I hear the walls repeating the falling of my feet and it sounds like drumming.”

197. “I hear the rocks and stone echoing my song.”

Why We Build The Wall 198. “Why do we build the wall my children, my children?”

199. “We build the wall to keep us free.”

200. “That’s why we build the wall, we build the wall to keep us free.”

201. “How does the wall keep us free my children, my children?”

202. “How does the wall keep us free?”

203. “How does the wall keep us free? The wall keeps out the enemy.”

204. “Who do we call the enemy my children, my children?”

205. “Who do we call the enemy?”

206. “Who do we call the enemy? The enemy is poverty and the wall keeps out the enemy.”

207. “We have and they have not my children, my children. They want what we have got.”

208. “What do we have that they should want my children, my children?”

209. “What do we have that they should want? We have a wall to work upon.”

210. “Our work is never done my children, my children.”

Why We Build The Wall (Outro) 211. “There are papers to be signed. Step into my office.”

212. “A lot can happen behind closed doors. That’s for sure, that’s a fact.”

#ask meme #rp meme #sentence meme #musical meme #hadestown #hadestown act 1

14 notes · View notes

anti-pasto · 4 years

Note

for the 200 ask thingy, i actually dare you to do all of them. :D

delgaskarthalexhere we go, anon:

200: My crush’s name is: I don’t have one right now, I don’t get them often (if I ever had a crush at all)

199: I was born in: 2003

198: I am really: A 2005 emo kid x a 2008 scene kid x a 2014 tumblr fangirl x Kyle himself

197: My cellphone company is: Apple

194: My ring size is: Honestly? No idea. Propose to me with a sword.

193: My height is: Somewhere between 5′7″ and 5′8″

192: I am allergic to: Nothing I’m aware of

191: My 1st car was: 94 Station Wagon, by request

190: My 1st job was: being this funny is a full-time gig

189: Last book you read: Bone Gap by Laura Ruby

188: My bed is: “made”

187: My pet: I have a cat, I love her very much and I will show her to you if you dm me a cursed image

186: My best friend: We don’t use “best friend” for personal reasons, but they’ve been with me since I was 5 so, my one and only Bro

185: My favorite shampoo is: anything with “silky smooth” or “strawberries” on the bottle. i’m not that picky anymore.

184: Xbox or ps3: xbox or ps4 xbox

183: Piggy banks are: really useful

182: In my pockets: wallet, keys, phone, earbuds, black pen/pencil, earplugs, mini flashlight

181: On my calendar: i’m meeting a friend for smoothies tomorrow

180: Marriage is: something we shouldn’t push so much onto people. it’s a declaration of love, not an end-all fix-all to your life. i can’t ever see myself getting married but who knows!

179: Spongebob can: continue to be a relevant meme

178: My mom: i mean. we function. i can’t really complain about my family at large but i am defiantly looking forward to living literally as far away from them as i can.

177: The last three songs I bought were? psh, you think i pay for music? (folie a deux, lake effect kid, believers never die volume two) (those are albums but its okay)

176: Last YouTube video watched: I watched Markiplier play Uno

175: How many cousins do you have? 11? 12? I lost count

174: Do you have any siblings? I have a brother

173: Are your parents divorced? Nope!

172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes, I have been for a while

171: Do you play an instrument? dude HECK yeah! i vibe on piano, guitar, ukulele, clarinet, and im a drum major

170: What did you do yesterday? I went on a drive by myself.

[ I Believe In ]

169: Love at first sight: Nope.

168: Luck: Yes, but luck is something that can be engineered

167: Fate: To an extent

166: Yourself: I’d say overall, yeah. I still have doubts tho

165: Aliens: Mmmmmm yeah

164: Heaven: Yes

163: Hell: Yes

162: God: Yeup

161: Horoscopes: without an ounce of truth, they would have died a long time ago

160: Soul mates: the greeks had seven words for love. i think we have multiple soul mates to fit each of those categories. there are definitely people we’re just meant to vibe with

159: Ghosts: i want to say yes but i really dont know

158: Gay Marriage: yes. its 2020. grow up.

157: War: in theory? no. war is kinda messed up. in reality? not everyone is going to be down to nice diplomatic conflict resolution, and not everyone is just gonna leave people *countries* they don’t like alone, so...

156: Orbs: ??? energies are real

155: Magic: vibes are real

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses: hugs

153: Drunk or High: i am a child of jesus

152: Phone or Online: online

151: Red heads or Black haired: irdc but black hair bc i am Emo

150: Blondes or Brunettes: blonde?? ig?? easier to dye

149: Hot or cold: hot weather + cold rooms

148: Summer or winter: summer

147: Autumn or Spring: autum (screw spring)

146: Chocolate or vanilla: vanilla

145: Night or Day: night

144: Oranges or Apples: oranges (better to share with homies)

143: Curly or Straight hair: i dont care but curly

142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonald give iced coffee

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: dark chocolate

140: Mac or PC: pc for vidgya gaemes

139: Flip flops or high heals: ...converse. please. i cant walk properly in either of those

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: sweet and poor

137: Coke or Pepsi: pepsi

136: Hillary or Obama: this is kinda outdated but obama

135: Burried or cremated: cremated i aint watch spn for nothin

134: Singing or Dancing: singing. at least that gets better with practice

133: Coach or Chanel: chanel (thank u mr frank ocean and also the neighborhood)

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: whomst

131: Small town or Big city: big city and if you say small town you’ve never lived in a small town

130: Wal-Mart or Target: target

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: who tf is this

128: Manicure or Pedicure: idk dude probably pedicure i don’t like people touching my hands and i use them for too much to get my nails done

127: East Coast or West Coast: hnngggggggg west coast has more to do but east coast has better beaches and

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday

125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate bc then i can give u some

124: Disney or Six Flags: ive only been to disney so disney (though i AM a HARDCORE rollercoaster stan so it wouldnt take much for me to say six flags)

123: Yankees or Red Sox: what

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War: unfortunately sometimes necessary but not as a first resort i went over this already

121: George Bush: is that the shoe guy?

120: Gay Marriage: be gay. do crime. kiss wife. or husband. or partner. basically, hell yeah

119: The presidential election: america need 2 b single and focus on herself

118: Abortion: pro-choice and that choice should be made by the one carrying the baby

117: MySpace: tumblr’s dad

116: Reality TV: don’t talk to about abt this

115: Parents: disgusting. go to therapy.

114: Back stabbers: if you’re gonna stab me in the back, pull my lungs through my ribcage bc that’s what my ancestor’s ghosts are gonna do to you (thanks great (x a few times) grandma viking ily thanks for the hair:) )

113: Ebay: good for merch and selling books

112: Facebook: zuck my dick, data-theif

111: Work: i like doing work? like- i enjoy completing tasks and seeing my hard work pay off? it’s not that bad?

110: My Neighbors: old. boring. want me to babysit for free.

109: Gas Prices: i cant really complain rn they’re kinda low and im a little broke so

108: Designer Clothes: i vibe to them, honestly

107: College: not for everyone but definitely for me

106: Sports: marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport marching band is a sport but only technically speaking though you can make fair comparisons to sports such as cheer, and gymnastics where the idea is to put on a show and receive a score in the form of competition.

105: My family: disgusting

104: The future: the future doesn’t exist

[ Last time I ]

103: Hugged someone: god, don’t ask me this

102: Last time you ate: uhhh like 9 hours ago? it was dinner and i had pizza

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: three or four weeks ago by best bro came to visit and we vibed

100: Cried in front of someone: i finished twist and shout at school at the end of a very bad week. it was only a few tears but that’s as close as i get to crying

99: Went to a movie theater: whenever the last star wars movie came out

98: Took a vacation: last year i went to dc over summer break to see the Smithsonian, it was a lot of fun. i was supposed to go to altanta and florida this year but that didn’t happen for reasons

97: Swam in a pool: last week

96: Changed a diaper: never

95: Got my nails done: never

94: Went to a wedding: its been at least 6 years dude

93: Broke a bone: never, somehow

92: Got a peircing: nope

91: Broke the law: technically, yesterday. 55 is too slow

90: Texted: just now

[ MISC ]

89: Who makes you laugh the most: the person in my snap named “junior”

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my cat

87: The last movie I saw: probably into the spiderverse

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: things going back to normal. or somewhat normal. i need school to have a schedule bc i absolutely cannot force myself to function without outside influence

85: The thing im not looking forward to: ironically, school in the fall. the way we’re going back is going to wreck me more than lockdown already has

84: People call me: i only ft one of my bros and they know who tf they are if you ask to ft you’re getting fuckin blocked mate i dont do that shit video calls are for WORK and SCHOOL thats IT. but ppl call me by my nickname irl, i go by screech on here.

83: The most difficult thing to do is: listen to my parent’s political opinions? live in a small town? force myself to be productive without a physical influence and reminder? put up with that one dude?

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: nope

81: My zodiac sign is: scoprio/leo/gemini

80: The first person i talked to today was: the potential bassist for our potential band?

79: First time you had a crush: uhh im still not sure if it was a crush but i wanted them to myself and they wanted (and got) someone better. we were just friends so it doesn’t really matter

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: the person on snap named “the great oracle”

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: yesterday, it was my brother

76: Right now I am talking to: in order of snap names, “vibin ~[^.^]~”, “russian umbrella”, and “mom” (not really)

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully, a job that makes me happy

74: I have/will get a job: as soon as i know what’s going on with school. but like as an adult? wherever will hire me and pay my fairly. being a barista would be fun, but at a local place (not in my current town)

73: Tomorrow: ???? time for bad poetry: tomorrow i will see my friend/ admist this lasting chaos/ we will be each other’s solitude/ while sharing fruity drinks/ and when we both come home/ a smile we will bring

72: Today: idk what this means so more poetry: today i will be sleep deprived as always/ i will think of them and weep/ but no tears will fall from my eyes/ for i know there is a reason/ we went our own way

71: Next Summer: i fr dont know whats goin on so: next summer i will be/ as happy as can be/ because i will be in pain no longer/ the earth is sure to heal/ and i will heal with her/ so i can enjoy/ the heatwave of next summer

70: Next Weekend: next weekend i will spend/ my days wasting away/ maybe ill finish hannibal/ again/ not that serial killers make the dopamine stay/ i will not see my friends/ or talk to my family/ i will seldom eat/ and live off coffee/ this has been my life/ all quarintine/ god someone please help me

69: I have these pets: i have four cats, three chickens, and a dog

68: The worst sound in the world: my dad and grandpa talking

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Them

66: People that make you happy: snap name time: the great oracle, junior, vibin ~[^.^]~, russian umbrella, mom, hero, booby-king 48, go to bed, son, pooper trooper, mac&cheese, plain egg biscuit, apple pie

65: Last time I cried: i dont cry bitch (last week over officals that cant make up they gottdamned mindes)

64: My friends are: my family and i would die for each and all of them

63: My computer is: an old hp but it play gaemes real good so it okie

62: My School: is trash but the band pops off

61: My Car: old, fast, clean

60: I lose all respect for people who: are my dad

59: The movie I cried at was: i cried over big hero six

58: Your hair color is: blonde

57: TV shows you watch: supernatural, good omens, hannibal, parks and rec

56: Favorite web site: this hellsite or youtube

55: Your dream vacation: out of the country with beautiful beaches, amazing food, and my best friend

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: the time i split the back of my head open, the time i split my chin open, and the time my then best friend said they didn’t want to talk to me anymore. i’ll let you guess which one hurt the most and which one i think about every fucking day

53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium or medium well.

52: My room is: clean and a reflection of myself, or so i’ve been told

51: My favorite celebrity is: i do not engage in celebrity worship. ill follow them and reblog gifs/interviews but i dont really have a favorite. the less i know abt them the better.

50: Where would you like to be: my own apartment in nyc

49: Do you want children: FUCK THEM KIDS BRO

48: Ever been in love: i dont know if it was love. i dont know if it was a crush. what i do know id that i was attached and they didn’t feel the same, and why would they?

47: Who’s your best friend: we dont really use best friend bc but “the great oracle” “junior” and “vibin ~[^.^]~”

46: More guy friends or girl friends: its 50/50

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: goin fast, the beach, playin video games

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: them

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: go to college, earn degree

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: commit arson

41: Have you pre-named your children: FUCK. THEM. KIDS. BRO.

40: Last person I got mad at: they do not understand that they do not know everything about something they’re not even involved in yet

39: I would like to move to: new zealand

38: I wish I was a professional: artist? musican? youtuber? who knows

[ My Favorites ]

37: Candy: nerds

36: Vehicle: 1970 mustang gt

35: President: jfk only bc his assassination is the only good thing abt american history the rest of it is fucked up and shouldn’t have happened. also jfk’s song in assassians the musical goes hard

34: State visited: california

33: Cellphone provider: verizon? apple? idfk

32: Athlete: what is sport

31: Actor: i don't watch shows or movies

30: Actress: i do not consume media

29: Singer: alex gaskarth or alexander deleon

28: Band: fall out boy

27: Clothing store: hot topic (i will not apologize)

26: Grocery store: okay harris teeter fucks but lidil’s has aloe vera juice and target at 9 pm energy so idk man

25: TV show: supernatural...

24: Movie: big hero 6

23: Website: tumblr or youtube

22: Animal: snow leopard

21: Theme park: busch gardens bc roller coaster go fast

20: Holiday: christmas

19: Sport to watch: snowboarding bc its like skateboarding but on snow

18: Sport to play: anything with havy footwork (marching band is a sport)

17: Magazine: i do not condume media

16: Book: the ranger’s apprentice series as a whole makes up my all-time one favorite book

15: Day of the week: friday bc its game day baybey

14: Beach: cocoa beach in florida but also i have so much left to experience

13: Concert attended: i havent been to any notable gigs but i was supposed to go to hella mega

12: Thing to cook: pancakes

11: Food: pizza or shushi

10: Restaurant: chiplote

9: Radio station: i like my local rock station and my local edm/top 40 station

8: Yankee candle scent: anything smoky or vanilla idc

7: Perfume: chanel no. 5 if i even wear it

6: Flower: Hydrangea

5: Color: orange

4: Talk show host: cecil palmer

3: Comedian: john maulaney

2: Dog breed: yes

1: Did you answer all these truthfully? ;)

That was a trip. But it was fun, please do things like this more often. Also, I don’t consume media by choice. I’m not sheltered I just can’t be bothered, and I have enough going on. That being said I will now be sleeping. Thanks again, Anon, I hope you have fun reading this :D

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vfdbaudelairefile13 · 4 years

Text

Chapter Thirty-One:

The One With the Cryptic Couplet

“Follow me,” Hector directed the children as he walked over to his barn. After unlocking eight different types of locks, he glanced around, making sure one last time that the only people around were himself, Violet, and Klaus. He smiled at the two siblings as he lifted a piece of the board up and used his retinal scan. The scanner beeped, flashing from red to green, allowing Hector to open the barn.

Violet and Klaus looked around the small barn with eyes full of wonder, especially Violet. They saw what was shaped to resemble a pirate ship but instead of looking exactly like a pirate ship, it was made of several baskets with green hot air balloons, most of which were only half-inflated. Violet gazed around the barn pulling out her ribbon as she walked.

“What do you think?” Hector asked. “Isn’t she beautiful?”

“What is it?” Klaus asked in amazement as he and Violet continued to stare at the invention.

“It’s our ticket out of this town,”

“But what is it?” he asked in the same tone.

Hector walked closer to his invention, eventually climbing on board. “It’s a self-sustaining hot air mobile home,”

“A...self-sustaining hot air mobile home,” Violet repeated looking at it in awe.

“A self-sustaining hot air mobile home,” Klaus repeated. “Like a hot air balloon?”

“It’s the same idea, only each basket is its own room. It’s like an entire flying house. Or it will be, once I run more tests on the engine.”

Violet’s smile was hurting her cheeks. She gazed all around the invention. She looked at Hector. “Did you invent it yourself?”

He nodded. “You see, Rule number 67 states no citizen is allowed to use or build mechanical devices,” he explained as Violet’s face drained of happiness.

“Wait, what?” Violet asked. “Does that mean I can’t build or use any mechanical devices? Am I considered a citizen of VFD now that the town is my guardian?”

Hector shared a small frown with Violet. “Unfortunately, yes you are. You have to follow rule #67 along with all the other rules,”

“But Violet is an inventor!” Klaus argued. “She’s a mechanical genius!”

Violet smiled. “I mean...I wouldn’t say genius...my father would...but I’m too modest for that,”

Klaus rolled his eyes. “Yeah, modest,”

Violet playfully punched his arm. “Shut up, bro,”

Hector sighed. “Well you see, the Council of Elders instructed me to destroy our inventing materials, but I brought them here. I’ve been working on this device ever since. If Violet doesn’t mind maybe she can help me out with it?”

Violet glanced around the small barn. “I’ve always wanted to have an inventing studio,” she pulled her hair tighter into her ribbon. “What have you invented so far, Hector?”

“Oh, just a few little things,” Hector replied. “But the self-sustaining hot air mobile is my enormous project. As Klaus said, it’s sort of like a hot air balloon,” he explained as he walked across his invention. “My invention is nothing more than a hot air balloon, except it’s much larger. Instead of one large basket, I have thirteen baskets, all tied together below several hot air balloons. Each basket serves as a different room. It’s completely self-sustaining...once you get up in it, you never have to go back down. In fact, if I ever get my new engine to work properly, it will be impossible to get back down. The engine should last for more than one hundred years, and there’s a huge basket that I’m willing with food, beverages, clothing, and books.” He sighed. “Once it’s complete, I’ll be able to fly away from VFD and the Council of Elders and everything that makes me skittish, and live forever in the air.”

“It sounds like a marvelous invention,” Violet replied. “But I must ask, how in the world have you been able to get the engine to be self-sustaining too?”

“That’s giving me something of a problem,” Hector admitted, “But maybe if you two took a look at it, we could fix the engine together.”

Klaus shuddered at the thought of inventing or even crafting anything ever again, after what happened the last time he tried that. He chuckled nervously. “I’m sure Violet could be of help,” Klaus explained. “I am not much of an inventor. I’m more interested in reading and research. Does VFD have a good library.”

Hector frowned and sighed. Walking to a specific basket in his invention. “Unfortunately, no. Rule 108 states that the VFD library and its citizens cannot own any books that break any of the other rules. If someone in a book uses a mechanical device, for instance, that book is not allowed.”

Klaus’ face fell instantly. He couldn’t imagine any book passing this town’s strict criteria. “But...there are so many rules. What kind of books could possibly be allowed?”

“Not very many, sadly,” Hector replied gesturing for Klaus to walk to him. “And nearly all of them are dull. There’s one called The Littlest Elf that’s probably the most boring book ever written. It’s about this irritating little man who has all sorts of tedious adventures. And then, of course, there’s the book of VFD rules.”

“That’s too bad,” Klaus said glumly. “I was hoping that I could do a little research into VFD, the secret, that is, not the village, in my spare time.”

Hector smiled at Klaus. “Well, if you noticed I have loaded the baskets with all the necessities,” he said pointing at the large basket in front of him. Klaus glanced at what the basket contained. His face lighting up slightly.

“Is this a library?” he asked.

Hector nodded. “You see, the books that didn’t fit the strict criteria were given to me to burn. But I hid them so I have something to read,”

Klaus’ eyes glazed over in happiness as he touched one of the books on the top. “Wow, I’ve seen public libraries, private libraries, school libraries, legal libraries, reptile libraries, and grammatical libraries, but never a secret library. This is exciting.”

Violet rolled her eyes. “You’re such a nerd,” she joked.

Klaus rolled his eyes. “I am not,”

“Yes, you are,”

Hector sighed. “It might be exciting, but it also makes me very skittish. The Council of Elders gets very, very angry when people break the rules. I hate to think what they’d do to me if they found out I was secretly using mechanical devices and reading secret books.”

Violet and Klaus looked at one another. “Don’t worry, Hector, your secret is safe with us,” Violet said as Klaus nodded.

“You mentioned you have a sister?” Hector said after a while. “We can’t forget about her. What does she like to do best?”

“She bites,” Klaus answers. “And she’s getting into cooking,”

Hector smiled. “Well, sadly for her, but Rule #4,561 clearly states that citizens are not allowed to use their mouths for recreation. If the Council of Elders knew that she liked to bite things for her own enjoyment, I can’t imagine what they’d do. But I’m sure I can find some things she can bite, but she’ll have to do it in secret.” He smiled kindly at the two siblings. “As for the cooking part, I’ve packed plenty of food. Most of them are crunchy foods, too. So maybe she’ll like that.”

“Thank you,” Klaus replied. Hector ushered for the two children to follow him out of the barn. He led the two siblings around another corner and the children got their first glimpse of where they would be living. The street that they had walked on simply ended at the turn of the corner, leading them to a place as wide and as flat as the countryside. With three shapes standing out on the flat ground. The first was the barn they had just exited. The second was the large, sturdy-looking house, with a pointed roof and a front porch big enough to contain a picnic table and four wooden chairs. But it was the third shape that had the two siblings staring in awe.

The third shape was the Nevermore Tree, but to simply say it was a tree would be like saying the Pacific Ocean was a body of water or that Count Olaf was a grumpy person or that the love story of Beatrice Baudelaire and Lemony Snicket was just a little bit sad. Nevermore Tree was gargantuan. Its trunk was so wide that the two siblings could have stood behind it, along with an elephant, three horses, and an opera singer, and not have been seen from the other side. It’s branches spread out in every direction, like a fan that was taller than the house and wider than the barn, and the tree was made to look taller and wider by what was sitting in it. Every VFD crow was roosting in its branches, adding a thick layer of muttering black shapes to the immense silhouette of the tree. Because the crows had gotten to Hector’s house as the crow flies, instead of walking, the birds had arrived long before Violet and Klaus, and the air was filled with quiet rustling sounds of the birds settling in for the evening. A few birds had already fallen asleep, and the children could hear a few crow snores as they approached their new home’s front door.

“It’s marvelous,” Violet muttered.

“It’s superlative,” Klaus agreed.

They stayed staring at the tree as Hector walked passed them to open the front door.

“You’re very brave to defy the Council of Elders,” Violet commented.

“Only behind closed doors, of course,” Hector explained. “When I’m in front of them, all I do is faint, which is why I have to leave this place. It’s too scary. Plus the fainting is hard on my lower back.” He glanced at the two children. “Maybe you could come with me…” he offered. “It’s big enough for us three...or even six. Think about it...no more rules, no more VFD. We could live up in the air forever.”

“Forever?” Violet asked frowning.

“Don’t you wanna escape your long, sad story?” Hector asked.

Klaus and Violet snuck a quick glance at each other. They both wanted that more than anything else in the world.

“Maybe...when we get our baby sister and friends out of danger,” Violet explained finally.

“And when Olaf is behind bars,” Klaus added.

“Who knows when that’ll be,” Violet explained sadly.

“Well, for tonight, I hope you two can ignore the noises the crows make. I know it might sound strange at first but you’ll get used to it before long. I always leave the windows open when I go to bed. The sounds of crows reminds me of the ocean and I find it very peaceful to listen to them as I drift off to sleep. Speaking of bed, I’m sure you must be very tired. I’ve prepared two rooms for you upstairs, but if you don’t like them you can choose other ones. There’s plenty of room in the house. There’s even room for your sister and the Quagmires to live here when we find them. It sounds like the five of you would be happy living together, even if you had to do the chores of an entire town.”

“That sounds delightful,” Violet said smiling at Hector. It made both siblings happy just to think of Sunny and their two triplet friends being safe and sound, instead of being in Olaf’s vicious clutches.

“Duncan’s a journalist, so maybe he could start a newspaper then VFD wouldn’t have to read all of the bullshit mistakes made by The Daily Punctilio, ” Klaus said smiling.

“Isadora is a poet,” Violet added. “She could write a whole book of poetry for the library...as long as her poems don’t break any of the rules.”

Hector started to open the door to his house, but then paused and gave the children a strange look. “A poet?” he repeated. “What kind of poetry does she write?”

“Couplets,” Violet answered smiling.

Hector gave Violet an even stranger look. He put down the children’s suitcases and reached into his pocket. “Couplets, you say?”

“Yes,” Klaus replied suspiciously. “She likes to write rhyming poems that are two lines long.”

Hector gave the youngsters a look that was one of the strangest that they had ever seen and he took his hand out of his pocket to show them a scrap of paper rolled into a tiny scroll. “Like this?” he asked and unrolled the paper. The orphans had to squint to read it in the dying light of the sunset, and when they read it once, they had to read it again, to make sure that the light wasn’t playing tricks on them and that they had read what was really there on the scrap of paper. Violet grabbed the paper from Hector’s fingers hurriedly. She looked to Klaus, who looked back at her. Both children felt as though their entire world had shattered. Violet glanced down at the shaky but familiar handwriting.

For our inheritance we are held in here,

Only you can end our fear.

__________________________________________________________________

Olaf sat in fetal position within the dirty, desolate cell of the Village of Fowl Devotees’ uptown jail. “ Trapped!” He cried. “ Caught like a trap in a rat! I can’t sleep....these dark, dank walls are closing in! I call to you, spirits of the jail cell, save me! Save me! How long has it been? The days turn to months!”

Jacques leaned up against the bars of the cell, arms crossed across his chest. He rolled his eyes. “It’s been eight minutes,” he countered. “You’re such a drama queen.”

Olaf glared at him. “Fuck off, Snicket,”

“Would you like some tea?”

“No, thank you,” Olaf replied rolling his eyes. “You Snickets always make it too bitter.”

“It’s like Lemony always said, ‘tea should be as bitter as wormwood and as sharp as a double-edged sword,” Jacques replied smiling.

“Don’t care,” Olaf said dismissively. He looked around. “I thought this stupid jail had a deluxe cell.”

“This is the deluxe cell,” Jacques explained, eyes pointedly staring at the noose the casually hung from the ceiling.

Olaf glared at the noose. “That’s bad news,” he muttered.

“Want some more bad news?” Jacques asked. “You’ll crack eventually.”

“For being offered tea? You’ve tried that on me for years. It hardly ever worked,”

“You’re going to tell us where the Quagmires and Sunny Baudelaire are. We expect the chief of police to be back any minute,”

Olaf did his best to hide his wicked smile from his enemy. “Do you now?” he asked sarcastically.

“I do now,” Jacques replied not noticing how Olaf’s demeanor slightly changed. “He or she will put you in the hands of the authorities and you’ll spend a long time in a cell of this quality or perhaps worse,”

Olaf chuckled at that. “Good luck,”

“And do you want to know why?”

Olaf sighed, rolling his eyes. “Is this where you give the big speech about morality and bla bla bla. More bullshit that VFD fed to you?”

“It’s because we represent the true human tradition,” Jacques began.

“That is a yes,” Olaf replied not even paying attention to the man.

“The best chance of extinguishing chaos and cruelty. We may be defeated, at least for a time. But we will never disappear. Not so long as there are noble, well-read people to take up the cause.”

Olaf frowned. His glare towards Jacques softened as he stared silently at his old friend. “ You still believe that? “ the man asked in an incredulous tone.

“Yes, I do.”

“ Why?!” Olaf asked.

Jacques ignored the man’s question. He glared at Olaf. “Now, where are the children?”

Olaf opened his mouth, Jacques foolishly believed the man was going to answer his question. Instead, Olaf began to scat. Jacques growled and walked away after flipping Olaf off.

He reached the office that Olivia was sitting in, preparing tea for the two of them.

“Did he talk?” she asked.

“Mostly about himself,” Jacques replied. “Which I am not surprised,”

“He won’t tell us where the kids are?” Olivia asked saddened. Jacques shook his head, frowning. “I want to find them,” Olivia hissed.

“I do, too. We know they’re nearby and alive. Olaf needs them for their inheritance. Once we hand him to the chief of police, we’ll search the town.”

“They must be scared,” Olivia explained. “Klaus Baudelaire and Violet, too.”

He sighed at Olivia’s words. He knew his associate made a valid point but he didn’t know how else to respond. “We all learn bravery the hard way, Olivia. I was scared when I joined the VFD. I was told memorizing a certain poem might help. When my siblings and I reached the VFD headquarters, we learned how to hit an olive with a bow and arrow. WE learned how to dance the waltz and the watusi, and how to determine if poison had been introduced into a cheese fondue without tasting it. But we were there voluntarily.” Jacques explained. “We are volunteers,”

Olaf, who could still hear the two volunteers, scoffed. “You’re an idiot if you still believe that Snicket. Where was VFD when Lemony went on the run? Where was VFD when he was dying? Where is VFD now, that his daughter and these other brats are in grave danger.?’ he asked.

“We’re right here,”

“Ready to indict them,” Olaf replied. “You’re no better than me. These kids don’t need your fucking cult. They need love and safety and whatever else helps orphans grow into adults. But they aren’t going to get that from either side of the schism, are they?”

“VFD isn’t a cult,” Jacques argued with Olaf.

“Believe what you want,” Olaf argued. “It’s your funeral,”

Jacques growled. “It’s not my funeral. Didn’t you ever hear the quote, ‘before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves?’”

Olaf shuddered. He closed his eyes. Took a deep breath. “Two graves is the exact reason I’m embarking on a journey of revenge in the first place. Don’t you remember, Snicket?”

Jacques rolled his eyes. “...these kids didn’t do shit to you,”

Olaf smirked. He didn’t care if Jacques and Olivia could only hear him. He knew that Jacques could hear the smirk that was plastered on his face. “Didn’t you ever hear the quote about how children will pay for the sins of their parents?”

“Oh fuck off. Stop trying to justify your behavior,”

“I’m not trying to justify my behavior,” Olaf argued. “I’m allowing you in on my thought process. Maybe if you understood me, you can imagine the despicable things I plan to do to all five of these brats..., especially Violet. “

Jacques stood up and was nearly about to rush towards Olaf but Olivia grabbed him holding him back. “He’s only trying to push your buttons,” Olivia tried to explain.

“It’s a good thing Violet looks like Beatrice…” Olaf commented knowing his words were getting under Jacques’ skin. “If she looked like Lemony...she wouldn’t be as pretty.”

“You sick fuck,” Jacques hissed.

“Well...maybe if she looked like Kit, ” Olaf noted. He winced at his mere mentioning of the woman who broke his heart.

“ That’s it you sick fuck!” Jacques yelled running towards Olaf’s cell. He reached in trying to grab the vile man. “ Do not compare my fourteen-year-old niece to my sister that you had an intimate relationship with!”

“ Had...have,” Olaf muttered. “Tomato, tomahtoe,”

“What did you say?” Jacques asked confused.

“Nothing, nothing,” Olaf said smirking. “How does it feel to never have the chance to meet your niece?”

“I’m going to meet her,”

Olaf smirked. “You can’t meet her if you’re dead.”

“Do you think you scare me?” Jacques asked. “You’re the one behind bars, not me.”

“For now,”

Olivia sighed walking over to Jacques. “Ignore him,” she said pulling Jacques away from Olaf’s cell as the villain continued to blab about whatever he thought would get a reaction from Jacques. “You said there was a poem that you recited...that helped you. What was the poem? The one you memorized on your way to VFD headquarters?” she asked as she pushed Jacques back into the small office where she had made tea.

Jacques sighed. “When you drive away in secret, you’ll be a volunteer. So don’t scream when we take you, the world is quiet here.” he recited, closing his eyes. For some reason, reciting this now just felt wrong.

“Poetry?” He asked. “You’ll stop at nothing to make me tell you where the brats are hidden.” He smiled a wicked smile when he realized where that stanza came from. “Oh, that’s rich. Can I be around when you teach your niece that one.”

“Fuck off,” Jacques called out annoyed.

“Maybe we can change the words so it’s about her instead of who it’s actually about,”

“Ignore him,” Olivia repeated.

Both volunteers could hear a strange sound coming from near where Olaf’s cell was. Jacques got up, ready to investigate. Olivia grabbed his arm. “I’ll go check on him. He could be making unnecessary noise to get your attention,”

Jacques nodded as Olivia walked away. He waited for a few moments.

“Who are you?” He could hear Olivia asked.

“The new chief of police,” the woman answered in her disguised voice. She had her visor down over her eyes, so all Olivia could see was she was a very nice-looking blonde woman who wore blood-red lipstick. But there was something about that voice that seemed familiar to Jacques, he couldn’t put his finger on it though.

“Ah, good,” Olivia said as she showed the VFD chief of police to Olaf’s cell. She turned away from the woman to lead the woman to the occupied jail cell. “We’re so glad you’re here. This man…” she began before she felt something sharp and pointy poking at her back. She froze in place. Unsure of what to do. She slowly turned around to watch the woman push up her visor, unmasking the hidden half of her face. Olivia glanced nervously at the woman’s cold, cruel eyes.

“Is my boyfriend,” Esme Squalor finished for Olivia, poking her back again with the harpoon gun that Olaf had gifted her. Olivia gulped and screamed a bit, unsure of whether or not Esme was going to pull the trigger and end her where she stood. Esme grabbed the woman’s arm, pinning it behind her back, keeping the harpoon gun pointed at her. She pushed Olivia towards where Jacques was sipping and enjoying his tea.

When Esme and Olivia reached the doorway, Jacques’ eyes went wide.

“Why hello Snicket,” Esme hissed. “Fancy seeing you here,”

“Esme,” Jacques said standing up. “Unhand her now! ”

Esme smirked towards Jacques, keeping the harpoon gun in its place. “Come with me or the unstylish woman gets it,” she ordered.

Jacques wanted so much to rush towards Esme and kick her ass. But he took one glance towards the terrified Olivia and decided against it. “Unhand her. You want me,”

Esme grabbed onto Olivia’s hair tightly as she pointed the harpoon gun at Jacques. “Let’s go,” Esme demanded gesturing for Jacques to walk in front of her. Jacques followed her orders. Still worried more so about Olivia then himself. Esme gestured for Jacques to walk over to Olaf’s cell. “Well, let him out,” she demanded.

Jacques took the key out of his pocket. He sighed angrily. “I fucking hate you both,” he muttered as he unlocked Olaf’s cell. Olaf walked out of the cell, a smirk plastered on his face. He took the key from Jacques’ hands before punching Jacques in the face. With the impact of the punch keeping Jacques distracted. Olaf kicked the man into the cell and slammed the door shut, using the key he had taken and locked it shut. Jacques rushed to the front of the cell, reaching out in hopes of grabbing Olaf or Esme.

“You won’t get away with this!” he yelled.

Olaf laughed as Esme walked Olivia over to a different cell and pushed her in, causing her to fall on her ass. Esme slammed and locked the door.

Olaf looked to Esme. “Took you long enough,”

“Hey, you’d still be jail if it weren’t for me,”

Olaf rolled his eyes but stared at Jacques, who glared at him from behind bars. “What I’ve always wanted to see a Snicket behind bars…” his eyes lit up with an idea. His Grinch-like smile slowly crawling on his face. “A Snicket behind bars…” he repeated again.

“What?” Esme asked confused.

“I think Jacques here has helped me figure out how to get his niece in my clutches,” Olaf explained. “A Snicket behind bars…”

“I don’t follow,” Esme admitted.

Olaf smirked. “Oh, you’ll see,” he said. Jacques merely glared at him.

“Whatever your planning...it won’t work!”

“Well, we won’t know until we try,” Olaf argued. “I can see the headlines now…”

“What headlines?” Jacques asked worriedly.

“What are you planning, you fuck?” Olivia asked worriedly.

“Count Olaf...arrested,” Olaf stated staring strangely at Jacques. “No...that’s not good enough. How about… Count Olaf has been murdered. Yes...that one has great potential.”

“You’re getting murdered? Good. Finally. By who?” Jacques asked.

Olaf smirked at his old friend. “Oh, I’m not the one that’s going to be murdered. You are.”

Jacques’ face fell as Olaf revealed the main part of his plan. “You won’t get away with this,”

“And to answer your question...of who murdered me...well isn’t it obvious?” Olaf asked. Esme smiled as she finally caught on to this part of Olaf’s overcomplicated plan. “Violet Snicket and Klaus Baudelaire, of course. Who else would want me dead?”

“Everyone,” Jacques replied bitterly. But no one heard his reply over the maniacal laughter of Esme Squalor and Count Olaf.

“It’s brilliant, brilliant, brilliant!” Esme cheered.

“It certainly is… soon little Violet Snicket will see herself where her father should have ended up...behind bars,” Olaf said as he continued to laugh.

The laughter that filled the uptown jail made Jacques and Olivia feel sick with anxiety. Both adults feared for not only the lives of the five children they were trying to save...but they also feared for their own lives.

8 notes · View notes

thewritingstar · 4 years

Note

Ah well were all at home better ask all 200 questions g, don't really know much about u

200 QUESTIONS???? ALRIGHT HERE YA GO.

hope you enjoy me spending an hour answering all of these :)

200: My crush’s name is: N/A 199: I was born in: 2000 198: I am really: nice 197: My cellphone company is: idk 196: My eye color is: Hazel, can turn dark brown or light green sometimes 195: My shoe size is: 8 194: My ring size is: 7 I think 193: My height is: 5′3 192: I am allergic to: penicillin 191: My 1st car was: Toyota 190: My 1st job was: Baskin Robbins 189: Last book you read: Suicide Notes (highly recommend) 188: My bed is: galaxy bedding and is currently on the floor in my bed fram cause my friends broke it... 187: My pet: Black cockapoo and a white cockapoo named Abby and Molly 186: My best friend: is a hoe 185: My favorite shampoo is: herbal essence color me happy 184: Xbox or ps3: I perfer Wii, Wii U or Nintendo switch 183: Piggy banks are: cute, Mine is a ducktales cup 182: In my pockets: nothing rn 181: On my calendar: nothing rn 180: Marriage is: a good thing but not a necessity for a happy life 179: Spongebob can: get it 178: My mom: is a queen 177: The last three songs I bought were? i only buy cds for my car so: Lover, Hozier, Blink 182 176: Last YouTube video watched: The Office deleted scenes 175: How many cousins do you have? 8 but I only see four of them and two of them are adults with kids so i consider them more of aunt and uncle figures 174: Do you have any siblings? One older sister 173: Are your parents divorced? Nope 172: Are you taller than your mom? Nope 171: Do you play an instrument? Nope 170: What did you do yesterday? Sat on ass and watched youtube

[ I Believe In ] 169: Love at first sight: ye why not 168: Luck: yes 167: Fate: yes 166: Yourself: kinda 165: Aliens: yes 164: Heaven: mmmm yes i guess 163: Hell: yes 162: God: uhhhhh yes and no, kinda indifferent 161: Horoscopes: yep 160: Soul mates: yesss 159: Ghosts: ye 158: Gay Marriage: WHO THE FUCK DOESNT BELIEVE IN THISS?? ITS REAL 157: War: think it does more harm than good 156: Orbs: ye 155: Magic: ye i wanna be a wizard

[ This or That ] 154: Hugs or Kisses: hugs 153: Drunk or High: drunk, i dont do drugs and i dont drink yet but ill prob get drunk 152: Phone or Online: oo i use both but Online i guess 151: Red heads or Black haired: Black hair 150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes 149: Hot or cold: HOT 148: Summer or winter: Summer 147: Autumn or Spring: Both 146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla 145: Night or Day: Day 144: Oranges or Apples: Oranges 143: Curly or Straight hair: I have straight hair but curly hair is also beautiful 142: McDonalds or Burger King: BURGER KING..I HATE MCDONALDS 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: MILK 140: Mac or PC: Pc 139: Flip flops or high heals:...High heels prob 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: SWEET AND POOR, IM ALREADY UGLY 137: Coke or Pepsi: NEITHER 136: Hillary or Obama: obama 135: Burried or cremated: cremated 134: Singing or Dancing: love both but maybe dancing rn 133: Coach or Chanel: Coach 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: idk who they are 131: Small town or Big city: Big city, i grew up in a small town 130: Wal-Mart or Target: TARGET 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Adam 128: Manicure or Pedicure: Mani 127: East Coast or West Coast: West Coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas 125: Chocolate or Flowers: Chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: DISNEY 123: Yankees or Red Sox: eww sports

[ Here’s What I Think About ] 122: War:....does more harm than good 121: George Bush:....dont know enough to say but im pretty sure he was an awful human 120: Gay Marriage: It should just be called marriage, just because you’re gay doesnt make it any less or any more, its equal to other marriages 119: The presidential election: 118: Abortion: Pro Choice, no one has the right to tell someone what to do with their body 117: MySpace: i never used it cause i was too young but i bet it was lit 116: Reality TV: its funny af 115: Parents: are nice if they care about their child but if they are abusive or horrible then they dont deserve respect 114: Back stabbers: should be stabbed 113: Ebay: its nice 112: Facebook: full of idiots and boomers 111: Work: a scam 110: My Neighbors: they fine 109: Gas Prices: A SCAM 108: Designer Clothes: a nice but really $200 for socks, no mama 107: College: SHOULD BE FREE 106: Sports: fun but no one needs to make that much money for throwing a ball 105: My family: i like them 104: The future: is wild and idk at this point

[ Last time I ] 103: Hugged someone: my mom like a few days ago 102: Last time you ate: at 11 today! 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: 100: Cried in front of someone: my mom after i yelled at her 99: Went to a movie theater: i saw Onward when we were allowed outside 98: Took a vacation: went to disneyland last October 97: Swam in a pool: like almost two years sadly 96: Changed a diaper: when i was like 8 95: Got my nails done: never got them done because my mom wouldnt take me cause i was a ‘tom boy’ 94: Went to a wedding: never 93: Broke a bone: when i was three, my big toe 92: Got a piercing: my nose in January 91: Broke the law: i guess i sped the other day 90: Texted: literally as im doing this

[ MISC ] 89: Who makes you laugh the most: my friend 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: the silence of being alone 87: The last movie I saw: Princess and the Frog 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Moving for college 85: The thing im not looking forward to: 84: People call me: Deanna (real name), Dean, Star (what yall call me) ton of others 83: The most difficult thing to do is: idk 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: Aries 80: The first person i talked to today was: 79: First time you had a crush: Ive had 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my best friends 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: my friends over ft 76: Right now I am talking to: no one 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: hopefully being an animator 74: I have/will get a job: at disney 73: Tomorrow: doing nothing 72: Today: doing nothing 71: Next Summer: hopefully not on quarantine 70: Next Weekend: nothing special 69: I have these pets: 2 doggos 68: The worst sound in the world: ICE SCRAPING OR MOUTH BREATHING 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: 66: People that make you happy: my friends 65: Last time I cried: few days ago 64: My friends are: my world 63: My computer is: a Dell 62: My School: is a community college 61: My Car: it goes 60: I lose all respect for people who: are bigots, dehumanize people, republicans 59: The movie I cried at was: Onward had me sobbing 58: Your hair color is: Brown rn 57: TV shows you watch: theres too many 56: Favorite web site: tumblr or youtube 55: Your dream vacation: every disney park 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: i think when i cut my finger or when i went to the hospital for my chest 53: How do you like your steak cooked: Medium rare 52: My room is: disney themed and my safe zone 51: My favorite celebrity is: Tara Strong 50: Where would you like to be: Disneyland 49: Do you want children: ehh maybe 48: Ever been in love: nope 47: Who’s your best friend: my neighbor that ive known since i was 4 46: More guy friends or girl friends: more girl 45: One thing that makes you feel great is: making cake 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: my cousin 43: Do you have a 5 year plan: not really 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: ye 41: Have you pre-named your children: kinda 40: Last person I got mad at: my mom 39: I would like to move to: La 38: I wish I was a professional: animator

[ My Favorites ] 37: Candy: Kitkat 36: Vehicle: Cars 35: President: 34: State visited: California, Nevada, Texas, Hawaii, 33: Cellphone provider: 32: Athlete: n/a 31: Actor: Colin O'Donoghue 30: Actress: Lana Parrilla 29: Singer: Joe Jonas, Taylor Swift 28: Band: Big Time Rush 27: Clothing store: Hot topic, Ross, 26: Grocery store: Safeway 25: TV show: Once Upon A Time or PPG 24: Movie: Princess and the Frog and Ratatouille 23: Website: tumblr 22: Animal: elephant 21: Theme park: disneyland 20: Holiday: Halloween 19: Sport to watch: hockey 18: Sport to play:..i do not play 17: Magazine: i dont read mags 16: Book: Kingdom Keepers 15: Day of the week: Friday 14: Beach: one i went to in Hawaii 13: Concert attended: Jonas Brothers 12: Thing to cook: chowmein and strawberry shortcake 11: Food: Chowmein 10: Restaurant: my fav Chinese restaurant 9: Radio station: I don’t listen to the radio 8: Yankee candle scent: Vanilla 7: Perfume: Vanilla 6: Flower: Rose or Larkspur 5: Color: Black or blue 4: Talk show host: umm i dont watch many but i guess Jimmy Fallon 3: Comedian: Jaboukie Young-White or John Mulaney 2: Dog breed: Pomeranian 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? ye

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