#I FELT SO PERSONALLY ATTACKED

[delzinrowe]

Cinema Therapy reacting to TWILIGHT: BREAKING DAWN

#Cinema Therapy #this has now become my favourite thing in the entire universe #BECAUSE MY NAME IS STEFANIE #WHO CARES IF ITS WRITTEN DIFFERENTLY #I FELT SO PERSONALLY ATTACKED #I JUST HAD TO GIF IT #ITS TOO FUNNY NOT TO #Also yall feel free to use the WHAT THE F@CK gif as reaction #ipost #twilight #twilight reaction #Twilight breaking dawn #HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS CHANNEL ON YOUTUBE #I just found them recently #Breaking Dawn #Stephenie meyer #also: relatable

[vikingpoteto]

ever think about the fact that Kenshi started as a member of Sonya's special forces and in the current timeline he basically steals her husband.

#poteto plays mk #johnshi #mortal kombat #i can't get over johnny introducing kenshi as handsome face #and the way he wrapped his eyes after kenshi was blinded felt personal #like a personal attack to me #god i love mk so much #why is it so bad and so good at the same time #btw this is not hate to sonya okay #we love sonya blade in this household #but i like her and johnny as exes i think

[maybeinanotherworld]

things that i have heard at the physics conference I've been at for the past three days:

*at a lgbtq+ event*

person 1: you can't leave, this is the queer room!

person 2: yes, but I'm a queer who wants room

*q&a after a history of physics keynote*

student: people say string theory is untestable, why is that?

speaker (and my former professor): (mumbled) well they're lazy-

*at a different keynote*

nobel laureate Donna Strickland: I thought sweden hung up on me, turns out I hung up on them

*research presentation*

speaker: this x-ray binary is called SWIFT-(ransom string of numbers and letters) but that's a mouthful so I'm gonna call her taylor

#i love physics events they're all so unhinged #shoutout to the person who absolute read me to filth and said #'someone with your speech patterns is either neurodivergent gay or a debate kid' #i have never felt so attacked by something that is completely true #physics #physblr #conference #idk why im tagging this #astrophysics

[happi-tree]

you are enough just as you are. it's gonna be o.k. it's gonna be o.k.

#anyone who felt personally attacked by ep31 raise your hand. or say aye this is a podcast #i. was not planning on doing one of these. but it got away from me and now here we are!!! #these kids. they're so!!!! wails for 1 billion years they're so much #found family group hugging in a burning house... the poetry of it all #dndads #dndads s2 spoilers #uh should i tag people? hm. mayhaps #normal oak-swallows-garcia #taylor swift #(not that one. but the other swifties should look at him too i think) #scary marlowe #lincoln li-wilson #happi doodles

[morsartis]

Listen. Listen I get the hype and thirst for Miguel O'Hara okay? I get it. BUT THE WAY I WOULD FOLD FOR HOBIE BROWN I SWEAR TO GOD. I would make lawn chairs jealous. Wet paper towels would have nothing on me. Origami would wish it could do what I would do. The unholy things I want that man to do to me would get me banned from church. I apologize in advance for the person I will become once ATSV gets released on demand. Hobie and Miguel had no reason to be that fine but if I don't see more people simping for Spiderpunk I will be DISAPPOINTED he was TOO GODDAMN PRETTY for you guys not to jump on that.

#miguel ohara #hobie brown #across the spiderverse #ONE VERY GOOD MOVIE #10/10 #I enjoyed the hell out of it #But my god the way I nearly lost it when Hobie pulled off his mask #LISTEN #HIS SPIDERVERSE LOOK IS AN UPGRADE THE BOY HAS ALWAYS BEEN FINE #BUT SPIDERVERSE FELT LIKE A PERSONAL ATTACK #please he is just #so pretty and important to me #He was so real for the entire movie the absolute BEST #If anyone needs me I will be CRYING over how good it was #THAT FUCKING PLOT TWIST THOUGH #I NEVER THOUGHT THEYD DO IT #BUT THEY DID AND I AM LIVING FOR IT

[yellowocaballero]

man, reading ch3 was a ride, it's like all fun and jokes and then all of sudden, Nope! It's time to be sad now! but it's so good with it? like, I really enjoyed how seriously you took it, and that moment in the classroom was really like 'oh shit this is legit' in a way that had my heart just sinking in my chest and with the tone whiplash from the rest of the fic so far, it was just literally so good to read. also, seeing byleth and the rest of the class just kinda grapple with wth to do with dimitri while he's deep in this episode is just very interesting, especially when they all have their own hangups and issues with everything. 👍

YESSSSS. I'm always so excited to post the moment the story actually kicks into gear, and this chapter was it for Weekenders. A lot of fun.

I wrote a post a while back about people's discomfort with writing severe mental illness,

and while I wouldn't say Weekenders is a spite fic, it was influenced by how difficult it was to find non-modern AU fic that wrote Dimitri specifically as somebody on the schizophrenia spectrum/bipolar.

It was so hit-me-over-the-head obvious while I was playing! His entire personality and behavior flipped on a DIME in Part 1, and it flipped 'back' in Part 2. He couldn't switch topics, he was ranting incoherently, he was having headaches, he was doing nothing but training, he obviously wasn't sleeping or grooming, he was convinced a 12yo had orchestrated an assasination - that's not depression/anxiety/PTSD, and it's not even just a psychotic episode (mania does have elements of psychosis, hence the paranoid delusions). And, obviously, the actual hallucinations, delusions, antisocialness, lack of grooming, impulsivity, etc, of Part 2 that rang very loudly of a schizophrenic/schizoaffective psychotic break.

But equally important is the fact that Dimitri's illness did not make him hateful and homicidal. Dimitri was always a hateful person. I don't think he's naturally hateful nearly to the degree that he shows while having an episode, but one of the most important lines in the BL route is when Dedue just says that Dimitri was always angry and hateful, and that he just hid it. His behavior in late Part 1/part 2 is him losing all capability to hide it. I don't think he's a pathological liar, and I don't think the Dimitri we see throughout Part 1 is 'fake' - I just think he withholds a lot. Dimitri's cruelty is just as important as his generosity. His hatred is as important as his empathy. The horrible sides of his illness are just as important as the comfortable sides. Do you see what I mean?

That is what interests me about Dimitri so much. Dimitri wants to be Marth. Dimitri tries to be Chrom. Dimitri dresses up like Roy. He is not. He is an angry, paranoid, brutal murderer. Any depiction of Dimitri that forgets that - that unironically only protrays the Dimitri that he shows the world and never the sides of him that he's ashamed of - is kinda buying what he's selling, and it both demonstrates a deep disinterest in who he is and a discomfort with the sides of his illness that aren't palatable.

Dimitri's psychosis did not make him hateful (I think his PTSD had a lot more to do with his anger problems). It made him scared. Mania and psychosis are a very, very scary experience. His mind is constantly telling him that he's in danger, that Byleth's in danger, that everybody and everything around him wants to hurt and kill him, that he is a sinner if he doesn't avenge his dead family. And Dimitri is a good child soldier, and he knows that we destroy our enemies with prejudice. He's a good leader, and he knows that the BL are never safe and that their enemies are everywhere. He's a good son, and he knows that you have to avenge them. Violence solves problems and Dimitri is scared and angry and if he doesn't solve the problem he can't protect the woman and people he loves.

This is serious to me! I'm trying not to make this THAT long but I could go ooooon lol. I understanding wanting to either make him realistically/explicitly schizophrenic OR make him violent, because violent schizophrenics are a bad and harmful stereotype. But I think both sides of him are important, because I don't want to whitewash Dimitri's illness or his experiences. It's scary for the people around you. It very frequenty is triggered from trauma and hardship and it is informed by your life. Like many characters in FE3H, Dimitri is the product of the evils of his world.

Byleth's arc in this story is about her growing into a human being. It is shown as a beautiful thing. It is wonderful to be a person. It would contradict the message of the story to show Dimitri as anything else but a human being - flaws, traumas, SMI and all. He was Marth to her. That's the point.

I went on for soooo long lol but thanks for the ask!

#my writing #my asks #you didnt directly ask about any of this but ive been itching to say it so love and peace <3 #i think its also worth mentioning that sometimes PTSD uh DOES make you hateful and angry and mean #and that it's. normal? expected? it's not inherently bad rep to show a character w/PTSD and anger issues? #like ppl will write a character w/PTSD but only if they get panic attacks and are sad :( #you know. sympathetic people. #i do think connecting violence with psychosis is bad rep but uh it's EXTREMELY hard to argue his ptsd #i felt this same way about Vash Trigun. #when people wrote Vash as GENUINELY #UNIRONICALLY #the person he pretended to be #it misses the point. to me it demonstrates a lack of interest in the character #you can project onto the self-esteem and depression so that's all the character is #and that doesn't leave room for the parts that are uncomfortable so those parts just don't exist #LIKE NOT A CRIME BUT. #JUST BORING? #BAD WRITING? #ok and to me. on the internet. being boring is the greatest crime of all. #fe3h #fire emblem three houses #dimitri alexandre blaiddyd

[fanatics4l]

that entire scene of billy being taken can literally be interpreted as a metaphorical rape scene. he's dragged downstairs by his ankles to an abandoned basement in the middle of nowhere while he's thrashing and screaming for help. the mindflayer holds him down and enters his mouth while he continues to struggle. when he's free, he runs away to his car and drives off to the nearest phone booth because he's terrified that it's following him.

he doesn't know what to tell the 911 operator, would they believe him? it all seemed very unrealistic. he has flashbacks and starts dissociating, replaying the scene in his mind, specifically the scene when it enters his mouth. and then he's faced with himself. the other billy represents the side of him that feeds his degrading emotions.

this is literally a metaphorical rape scene i don't know what to tell y'all. the way will's kidnapping can also be interpreted as a child predator holding a child hostage and violating him. joyce's initial thoughts must've been that her son was kidnapped by a sick person. and the fact that they found will unconscious with something forced in his mouth?? metaphorical assault scene.

and billy's shower scene? the black veins represent the phantom touches and pain left behind by his rapist. he's showering because he wants it off him but it's not going away. he's starting to dissociate and the memories are hitting him full force again.

do the duffers realize this connection? the show would be outstanding if they acknowledged the general theme of vecna/the MF representing an abuser/rapist who specifically targets troubled children because they're easier to manipulate.

#this scene actually makes me sick #why does the MF or vecna have to specifically target these children's mouths #its so gross #and then the whole snapping of their bodies and ruthlessly killing them? #that's a whole other thing #if the duffers noticed half the stuff the fans did maybe they could tackle more serious issues #also? the way brenner touches and stares and talks to el is so fucking creepy #i don't know if they intentionally made it creepy but it makes me gag #all of vecnas victims represent abuse or rape victims #but suffers are too scared to acknowledge that surely #billy made me so sad in that scene like oh my god give that boy a hug and a blanket and some space #he must've felt so violated #he probably didn't even initially know what was attacking him and genuinely thought a person was gonna rape him #billy hargrove #dacre montgomery #will byers

[donewiththisshitplsstop]

I've been having a hard time adjusting

I didn't know if you'd care if I came back

Could have followed my fears all the way down

But I'm here in your doorway

#f1 #charles leclerc #lewis hamilton #daniel ricciardo #nico rosberg #valtteri bottas #web weaving #first attempt at web weaving so forgive me if its shit #also was gonna do the whole i didnt know if youd care if i came back thing about maxiel but like i felt personally attacked by that notion #so just made it into a solely daniel thing #still weeping about the fact that the shakespearean tragedy that is brocedes acc played out irl #like wht #valtteri pascal (wehrlein) esteban lance and daniil break my whole heart #lance deserves the biggest apology #este deserves the comfiest hug #and yh everything about these drivers is just so heart clenchingly tragic #brocedes #alsoo lowkey pierre has gone THRU it #yuki apprently being the only driver on the grid whose aggressive enough to warrant a whole therapist only bcs he swears *le gasp* #stop infantilising him #its giving delusional #let the man swear without sticking a psychologist on him #obvs if he WANTS one give him one but dont give him therapy bcs swear words #also dont publicise it let him do all of that #wait i just digressed and rambled so hard #its like 12 am #sry :(

[july-19th-club]

horrible stupidass day. my aunt died. step-aunt technically; she was my uncle's second wife and she was amazing. they were putting up christmas decorations and she didnt feel well so she went to sit down and . that was it . feel weird bc its the middle of the week and im so wiped out from regular work crap that it isnt even hitting really i just found out and im . like sitting here thinking about dinner. but also she's the kind of person who wouldn't care; she'd think that was funny

#personal #dont reblog #i guess just bc its weird to me when ppl reblog specific personal events from peoples lives #but i also want to talk about her. we didnt see them that often bc they lived a couple states away so the last time was at grandmas funeral #but every time we got together she wanted to talk to me about blue october bc one time she found out we were both fans <3 #she was the most patient encouraging woman; her support never felt pushy or like an expectation it was like she just quietly knew you #could do it - whatever 'it' was #compassionate. down to earth. in a family of big personalities terri was just a solid regular open-minded loving person #its fucked up and stupid that she has to be gone and there are so many assholes who dont die of a heart attack while holiday decorating

[technicalthinker]

ok so I was already going through it after the preview but the ep doubled down and continued to explore buck's feelings in a way that was so surreal how messy and relatable and real it was. the way it portrayed his first gay dating experience as a bi adult: the nervousness and the overthinking and self-criticism and identity crisis and just mess that can come with it.

He is on-guard and ultra-aware. He is analyzing not just his surroundings but himself. He lies and hates it. He avoids telling Maddie, makes an effort of not saying it's a guy he dated, but when confronted he tries to downplay it: "Could be very much the point" VS "It shouldn't be though right". Because Buck knows that liking a guy isn't a big deal and should be normal etc but he feels and acts like a mess?? So he feels like a fraud. There are too many thoughts about expectations that clouds his thoughts. "I dont think you're a fraud, i just think that maybe you're not sure of your own feelings yet" Maddie says and it helps. The moment when Eddie makes that comment about him being single and he gets that distant look in his eyes and realizes this is the moment of no return as he embraces the words that he has been afraid to say out loud. The way the tension starts to loosen once it has been said, the way he can breathe. Buck deciding at the end to just allow himself to be and let himself crush on Tommy and see where that takes them, because he knows he likes Tommy, and that's enough.

#911 spoilers #911 abc #911 blogging #911 #this was literally brutal like i have never felt so personally attacked by an arc holy shit #im a half-closeted bisexual and like #sure ive known ive been bi for a while but actually getting close to dating a girl for the first time as a 26 year old and it #it has put me through it #there are a handful of bi reps that hits unlike anything else and in a bizarre turn of events this might be one of them. #like the SPECIFICITY of these moments and the direction has me reeling #was a while since i felt like a character went through it #*points* HE'S ME #like moments where ive been assumed straight and ive had that fucking same look as buck did #and more often than not ive said nothing and i just #felt it in my soul #so when he DID say it was a date i like??? fuck #but also just. the fact that there is no CLEAR direction of bucks fears and acting here #it isnt a conversation of 'im afraid people will be homophobic' #there is an INTERNAL struggle and it isnt even like. internalized homophobia. #it is just messy and real and just. 'who am i' #the way he wants to avoid the topic bc it is this new side of him thats been unexplored and #yeah. they designed this to be specific towards me for sure

[micahthemoon]

May 27 2023 Okay, you know what: I am low key angry about all the buzz that Käärijä is getting for having a normal body. People call him ‘fat’ and having to ‘lose weight’ but to me, he looks muscular and healthy. And it is not just online since I first encountered it irl with two girls calling him ‘Winnie the Pooh’. Do you know how much I’d give to have his body? To have his confidence? He is out there proudly showing his surgical scars and his tummy, and all people can see is that he is not model thin.

#this turned out to be more about jere/käärijä than my own gender identity so I'll elaborate a bit here #when people go after käärijä like this it hurts me and probably other like me since I do really wish I looked like jere #my gender envy tells me that this is the ideal to go for #I have actually never really felt drawn to the hollywood thin men and scrawny boys makes me anxious that I'll break them by touching them #and I know I'll never be thin #so people going after jere feels like an attack because if he is not good enough for you guys I'd never be good enough either #I have a strongly feminine coded body and I hate it even if people compliments it #so if let's say I actually ended up looking like jere then how would people even see me? these people's action tells me that they'd scorn me #scorn me for looking like my ideal self #for looking freaking normal #think about all the people looking like jere right - you are putting them down as well #by commenting negatively on one person's body you do not only hurt the person themselves but everybody with the same body type #or idiots like me having this bodytype as their ideal #micah out #käärijä #jere pöyhönen #esc #esc2023 #transgender #nonbinary #transmasc #gender envy #late entry #entry #findingmicah #also sorry for the rant

[crabussy]

I want to take a bite out of someone's arm but I'm too shy

#it's ok to reblog this post and ignore the rant in the tags I don't mind at all /gen #hi guys #got another load of trauma from school #and I am not dealing with it well at all my legs have been shaking so badly for 4 hours now #had a panic attack so bad that my face went numb and the edges of my vision went black and my legs gave way #I hate my teacher she's horrible god I can't even go into it here there's so much #I'm tired of getting abused at school I've been to half a dozen schools and have not gotten traumatised at ONLY ONE OF THEM #I have no adults I can go to about this #whenever I try to talk with her and the head teacher about the situation and why I'm fucking terrified of her she acts so patient and kind #whenever I'm alone with her she will yell at me about everything I'm doing wrong and continue yelling even when I'm in tears #she will berate me and put me down and insult me directly #when she gives feedback she always puts effort into making it hurt #the language she uses for negative feedback is never what a teacher should say it's always personal and uses your weaknesses to hurt you #I get really bad intrusive thoughts about her hurting me physically because of how terrified I am of her #the worst part is she acts nice and sweet whenever she's not picking apart my weaknesses and being cruel about my disabilities #I felt so sick after that I haven't eaten since #vent tw #trauma tw #listen to my gibberish boy #ggod I hate this school

[babacontainsmultitudes]

Accidentally coming across this devastating Glenn line is what made me feel compelled to make that Nick poll, fyi. Just in case you needed the opposite of a pick-me-up.

#dungeons and daddies #dndads #glenn close #nick foster #nick close #The dad fact that establishes this is relatively early in the show #and I remembered that right like I knew that #I did *not* remember this line #(maybe I repressed a lot of the sad late-season Glenn stuff idk it's really the most this show has ever fucked me up) #and I felt personally attacked by how sad this is #also clawing at the walls trying to scream at these fictional characters like #HE'S TRYING TO GRIEVE #HE'S TRYING TO GRIEVE BUT HE NEVER LEARNED HOW YOU CAN'T BRUSH HIM OFF NOOOOOO #HE'S TRYING SO HARD TO TALK ABOUT IT #HE WANTS TO TALK ABOUT NICK YOU NEED TO TALK WITH HIM ABOUT NICK #so now you know my answer to that poll! #Glenn and Nick are really something #they're really something cause on the one hand #there are a lot of important tells that Glenn actually understands his son *very* well #BUT ALSO #minions. and everything it says about their relationship #most especially Nick not being honest about his wants and his likes and his needs because he wants his dad to be proud of him #LIKE GLENN NOT BEING HONEST ABOUT HIS CAREER CAUSE HE WANTS HIS SON TO BE PROUD OF HIM #but they're so silly both of them #cause none of that stuff actually matters. As Glenn himself comes to understand at the end of the arc #Nick just wants his dad #AND GLENN JUST WANTS HIS SON NNGH

[whumpshaped]

its probably just me or whatever but genuinely one of the tropes that upset me the absolute most in media was like. when the villain kidnapped others and made them a comfortable home or smth, and was nice, and still the kidnapped ppl just kept going on and on about "can i go home now" "i want to go home" "when do i get to go home"

i know its absolutely irrational but i always felt incredibly bad for the villain and totally related to the anger when they eventually snapped. they did so much!!!!!! they were nice!!!!!! it was a nice place!!!!!!!

#actually please let me know if im not alone #or let me know what this says abt me lmao #im fairly sure its rooted in the fact that i never wanted to be home and if i was kidnapped and subjected to the cruel fate of #having to stay at a comfortably furnished place with a person who was nice to me completely free of charge and responsibilities #i wouldve never looked back #so on one hand i was jealous #on the other i feel like i also felt personally attacked when i saw someone's efforts not being acknowledged? #i understand. it was kidnapping and THEN niceness. i get it. i understand. #BUT VILLAIN WAS *NICE* WHY ISNT IT BEING ACKNOWLEDGED AND RECIPROCATED #so many feelings #like even just writing this out i feel that horrible urge to cry and also break things #it makes me feel so much #i need to write shit like this #its a little grace core tbh #somewhat. she has no illusions. she knows shes not trying to be particularly kind #but she does throw irrational fits like that

[androcola]

in case anyone wanted to see my 80's party outfit. that stupid sweater never made it in time (still not here!!!!!) so I had to wear this one

#personal #rl pics #selfie #staying on the floor was the only way i could keep from not having a fucking panic attack #like within 10 minutes of beibg there o felt so sick anf wanted to leavr #but i made it thru the night and had lots of fun skating 😁😁😁

[ainawgsd]

Nurse: *checks blood pressure. Checks BP again* I'm going to go get someone to double check me *leaves room*

Me: well that can't be good

#text post #personal #and it was not #they sent me by ambulance to the nearest emergency room #i felt fine #but all the healthcare workers kept looking at me like i was about to drop #convinced i was having a heart attack or maybe a stroke #all the tests came back normal #but my bp was persistently high #like stupid high #so now im on hypertension medicine #5.5 hours in the er and they still never addressed my primary complaint #which is pelvic issues