#I don't know how to cook

[everyday-is-brighter-with-you]

WHY AM I SO USEELESS /vent

#I'm sorry everyone sometimes I just can't #Hold it in anymore #I mean it's not like my tears ever mattered IRL #SO atleast I can scream abt it online #I fucked up a taxi ride #Had to pay double #And it just reminded me how fucking stupid I am #I don't know how to cook #Or manage finance #Or manage a house #Or do lot of work like laundry thru every individual cloth #Or even going to grocery for vegetables #I'm so stupid lol I probably couldn't even live alone #All I do is read poems and make art #I'm so stupid #I just want to kill myself #Again #I say #Txt #Negative tw #Suicidal tw #Vent #Please do NOT take this as directed at you

[dyesprout0ysphoria]

- 10 oz milk

- 2 tbsp sugar (mix of brown and regular)

- 2 tbsp cocoa powder (play around with different types!)

- 1 tsp vanilla extract

- 1 tsp instant cofee

- small pinch of salt

- (optional) dash of cinnamon and cardamom

- couple oz of chocolate (any kind mixed how you like)

Start by adding all the dry ingredients to a pot over medium temperature, pouring in a tbsp or two of water and whisk thoroughly till it forms a smooth "sauce." Add milk and heat till simmering. Add chocolate and stir till melted, use a spatula here to get in the corners. In your cup/mug/whatever add the vanilla (to keep it from being cooked off). Pour mix into cup, top with whatever, and enjoy.

My Friend, WHY

crihggfbjhf

#✧ dyesprout's randoms! ✧ #Hey it's Tvsoftboi! #gonna cry what rhghfefuck #I CAN'T EVEN MAKE THIS #I DON'T KNOW HOW TO COOK #I'LL BURN THE HOUSE DOWN

[guavajagular]

Hairy Senshi, save me

#senshi dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi #every time I draw Senshi I panic at how I don't know how to properly draw cooking techniques

[babaroqa]

pray for me people i’m preparing food i’ve never prepared before and it containes eggs and i’ll eat that for work lunch tomorrow and i hope i don’t die of food poisoning !!!

#i don't know how to cook #but it actually looks a lot like it's supposed to #like it was shown in the recipe #i'll definitely throw away the first batch #but hope the second will be edible

[medovzs]

my fav frenchman <3

#op #one piece #opla #vinsmoke sanji #sanji #fan art #pls babe make me dinner i don't fuckin' know how to cook

[mmthemayoarts]

...........Hedgehog behaviour

#sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #silver the hedgehog #sonic #this is silly but i saw so many pics of hedgehogs stucking their heads in paper tubes and had this idea #shadow probably tried that too but he won't admit it #i still don't know how to draw animal characters lmao excuse their weird faces #only Sonic's n Silver's in the tube view ares supposed to look cooked

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

There's nothing he can't do. Yet.

(Thank you to everyone who participated in the poll!)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #bonus comic #This whole poll and comic is very inspired by a convo I had with qourmet in one of their art streams. #namely that the Art Of Grilling is a powerful skill separate from cooking. #I've also been inspired by said convo to try and learn how to grill. What's the point of having a garden if I can't grill my summer squash? #Anyways. I hope this appeases the crowd that has been in arms about the prev prev poll. #I don't think teenji can cook. I think lan wangji is just very good at dedicating himself to whatever craft he needs to pick up. #give him a day and he will be a grill dad #the most powerful beast of the summer lawn biome. #Until then he will lie awake at night. Haunted by this inadequacy. He's just like me for real (chronic perfectionist). #I think this is the first domestic wangxian post i've made. God I'm so sorry wangxian fans. #wwx could not care *less* abt lwj having flaws. I think thats the beauty of this relationship. they *know* about each other's flaws FIRST. #Love each people *because* of the flaws - not despite them (thats my unsolicited advice for the day). #also if you noticed my medium gray marker slowly giving out...today it finally died on me....

[pinkd3mon]

Star Allies Guest Star teams

#kirby #kots #kirby of the stars #kirby fanart #taranza #king dedede #meta knight #magolor #susie kirby #bandana dee #welcome to Kirbtober where I'll post one shitpost per day #what do you get when you combine someone who likes to joke a bit too much and two people with dead relatives #you get what you fucking deserve /j #you guys don't know how much star allies mean to me #the character interaction potential #nothing fucking happens in-game but in my mind everything happens ñ #don't worry hal I know what you were cooking i get you... #in scale of power it's first Taranza then Magolor then Susie #but i feel like in a scale of bullying/strong will is Susie then Magolor then Taranza #magolor comes out as gay and susie says 'in that outfit?' #susie probably treats Taranza as a poor little meow meow and Taranza finds it condescending #but it's a cute girl paying him attention what's he gonna say?? stop?? #that cute girl is also a lesbian but Taranza needs to count his victories no matter how small they are #star allies may not be perfect but it gave me the triple threat team and for that it gave me decades of content #what else can i ask from my blorbos #meta knight is up on a star block because he has a complex #he likes to feel tall

[jiiyawns]

yeah im normal. im very normal. so normal. shadow prime amirite guys

i like this one the most so close up (ironically, this is the color palette i was the most scared to deal with bc i don't usually use greens)

#sonic #shadow the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog #sth #sonic prime #he's such a bastard and for what #smug bitch. he's literally 3 feet tall. im going to push him off the ark again #i think i like. i had a whole plan on how to do the bottom rectangle/i literally drew it first. but. #i think if i lineart something seriously. i lose the ability to color it the way i was planning. or something #visualized it completely and then just like it evaporated i don't know where the fuck the thought went it's gone??? #so now i think that coloring fucking sucks ass actually but i don't want to work on it any longer bc im like shaking my brain #and ic an't find the original THOUGHTS i HAD where did it GO i was COOKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! anyways. hi #fanart #draw

[utane]

Any beast can be tamed

#tarnma #tarn #pharma #art tag #transformers #maccadam #I don't know how to draw anymore but I'm cooking for my friends

[ryllen]

together let's go to the mountain ⛰️

#twst #twisted wonderland #treyjade #trey clover #jade leech #fanart #i don't know why there are less people in english fandom that ships them together #i am going down for them so hard just by being fed by all the fanarts from the japanese fandom #i love how they can support each others on the things they like #trey like cooking jade like eating #jade like mountaining trey can absolutely go along with him & match his pace with his physical fitness #plants? terrariums? mushroom? strawberries? no problem they both like to hang around in the botanical garden #trey giving mean eyes and show his meaner side oh jade would go absolutely ballistic #i just love them both together so much 🎶 #they are my comfort ship #and how jade is the baby girl but he is taller than trey oh absolutely adorable

[hwiyoungies]

when the realization Hits

#svtgifs #svtcreations #svtsource #svtdaily #forsvt #seventeen #soonyoung #this had me on Tears it took him a while to put two and two together but when he did #hoshi beloved don't lie truly is your game LMAO #b.edits #i have a wonu set cooking and possibly another hosh one don't know yet #it depends how i feel about flopping today LMAO

[diamondsheep]

Happy Birthday to the Best Cook Ever 💛💛💛

#look i know that i talk about Zoro all the time but you guys don't know how much i love Sanji #he is actually one of the reasons why i started watching One Piece and i just LOVE drawing him #i have like 100 drawings of the curly cook <333 #anyway happy birthday to this idiot that has bringed me so much joy and has made me cry so fucking much (*looks at Sanji's Backstory*) #ily sanji thank you for being one of my favorite characters ever 💛💛💛 #hmm i'm gonna tag this as sanji week bc i used some prompts as inspiration lol #also do guys like individual posts with individual drawings ? or batches like this one are ok ??? bc i can post these individually ? #one piece #sanji #sanji week #blackleg sanji #black leg sanji #one piece sanji #sanji one piece #my drawings #sanji op #one piece fanart #i guess that otoko is here too lol #otoko #toko #diamondsheep art #my art #aww i just sentimental about this fool and bc i drew him in basically all his life stages ? 😭💛✨

[egophiliac]

IMPORTANT QUESTION

My friends and I have started calling you the irl version of Lilia and we wished to know if you can cook because we are worried for the home if you cannot

(This is a light hearted joke)

I can (more or less) follow a recipe, which gives me the advantage! >:D ...although it is true then when left to my own devices I default to "dump in a bunch of random spices and see what happens". I...I just really like cayenne and turmeric okay --

other than that (and all the other many things that are different about us) Lilia and I are, y'know, basically identical.

#art #for a given definition of art anyway #twisted wonderland #it's canon that silver didn't know food could taste good until he came to nrc #if i remember right in his bloom birthday card lilia went on a long explanation about how he's been trying to cook healthy meals lately #(read: burned and yet somehow semi-raw vegetable mess that is basically already a compost heap) #and then at the end is like 'ha ha i don't eat the swill i make! that would be bad!' #'i just make everybody else eat it while i eat whatever' #sounds about right #i did once somehow manage to bake a cake for about 2 hours longer than it was supposed to bake for #and it was still underdone #it was a box mix so god only knows what happened there

[beanghostprincess]

Finding hilariously ironic how most of Sanji's perv jokes end up being extremely trans-coded to some extent only because the joke is longer than it should be.

The "guy with a woman's body" joke has been a thing for ages now, but it usually ends after the "haha I have booobs" joke. Sanji extends it to "I want to stay in this body forever. It feels right. I don't want to give it back". Which could still be read as some perverted stuff, but I don't think any man would agree with that. No matter how much of a pervert he is. Because usually being perceived as a woman is something they refuse to go through although they like being in possession sexually of a woman's body (a type of excitement Sanji actually shows, not by being that much aroused by it but being comfortable with it? Which is... A different approach to the joke).

Sanji has made the typical "going into the girl's changing room/bathroom" joke a couple of times, but in Egghead he goes all the way to be extremely frustrated about not being able to do so? And it is obviously different than wanting to keep Nami's body forever. It can still be seen as frustration for not being able to see girls naked. But. But. The fact that the length of the joke increases? The fact that it's way longer than it should be for an average "haha boobs" joke? You know what I mean.

Not to mention his whole arc during the time-skip and how a simple (both transphobic and misogynistic, by the way) joke, goes all the way to show us that Sanji is indeed comfortable in more feminine clothes and environment, until he's pretty much forced to snap out of his fantasy to go back to the crew. But he wasn't having a bad time at all. And it is intended to be a joke, but it's... Longer than it should be to be considered only a joke and to not pay attention to it.

This isn't meant to be an analysis of any kind because if it were I would've worded it differently and would've mentioned how his childhood is also extremely trans-coded, but we all already know that. I just find it extremely funny how all of these jokes that intend to be directed at straight perv men are actually too long to not be taken into consideration as something deeper than a joke. But, aha, yeah, these are just jokes and definitely not proof of Sanji's perception of gender and his issues with it.

#i KNOW these are just jokes but i'm just saying that increasing the length of a joke doesn't make it funnier it just makes it canon and real #the only one i consider to be a reach is the bathroom thing tbh but the other two??? sanji in the time-skip and punk hazard??? peak trans #also his whole backstory but we already know why that's trans coded #like-- finding extremely funny how so many cis straight dudebros keep wanting to project on him when sanji is sooo made for the queers #i am sorry but that's my bisexual genderfluid traumatized cook don't touch her #one piece #black leg sanji

[starry-bi-sky]

realizing i have. a lot of untapped trauma potential for clone^2 danny because i just Fully Processed Four Months Late the fact that his parents were capturing and torturing ghosts in the basement before he became Phantom. and the fact that he was on house rest for 2 weeks. during that time period. and he wasn't really leaving the house. he could hear their screaming through the floorboards

*points at clone danny* i can give you suuuuuuch a bad time babe ahaha. i've got two untouched years before you meet damian what fucks you up before then

#dpxdc #dp x dc #danny fenton is not the ghost king #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc crossover #dpdc #clone^2 #danny fenton is a clone #like i dont even need to traumatize you worse the pure explorative options from this aLONE is enough to feed me for a week. #like. tucks hair behind ear let me shatter you into glass pieces then glue you back together babe. i can put you back together so good. #i'm missing a few shards because some parts of you broke into such small pieces i couldn't pick them back up again so you'll be missing a #few chunks of yourself that you'll never get back but that's okay. you'll still be a resemblance of your old self :] #don't let anakin (me) listen to late night sad songs he makes angst. #hhh imagine being stuck in a house for two weeks where you can hear your parents torturing ghosts in the basement and not only that but #you're the only person who can undERSTAND the ghosts. how many times did he see his parents drag in a ghost with whatever capturing device #they made recently? iirc the thermos was like. brand new in episode one right? but gOD the trauma this alone would cause #nobody touch me im cooking rn i need to think about how this would impact danny. like obvs it would fuel into a developing obsession to #keep his parents away from ghosts and to help the dead but what *else.* i need to refine my becoming phantom ficlet i wrote back in winter #raaa #and like even after two weeks they were *still capturing ghosts* danny just wasn't in the house 24/7 at the time. #*but those two fucking weeks man* #i need to sleep on this first before i make any major moves bc i know im tired but i am having thOUGHTs