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drpanda99 · 1 year

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5-4-3-2-1 Fic retrospective + 2023 Things

I was tagged by @dragongirlg-fics - please go and check out her writing and translations! =D

Post the following: -top 5 works you’re most proud of that you released in 2022 (not necessarily your most popular) -your top 4 current WIPs that you’re excited to release in the new year -your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year -your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year -and your number 1 favorite line you’ve written this year!

Answers under the cut.

Top 5 works you’re most proud of that you released in 2022:

Collateral Circulation; and other protective factors: This was my WIPbang fic that I spent almost the entirety of 2022 working on. This is my longest piece of writing ever and something I'm extremely proud I wrote! One of my friends was worried because of how ambitious my plans for this fic was at first, but I managed to do exactly what I set out to do! I imagined it kind of as one of those medical shows where you follow different characters and cut back and forth between their lives. I imagined the hospital as a living, working thing filled with all these characters with their individual lives and problems; we get to follow wangxian closely, but everyone else has their own backgrounds etc going on. Maybe one day I'll write a commentary on what everyone's backgrounds and stories are!

[Podfic] I Don't Want to Debut! by Countingcr0ws: This was my first big podfic and I spent many, many hours working on it. I upgraded my setup once in the middle and had to re-record the first two chapters to match the audio! This was also my first time incorporating music throughout a podfic. I also transcribed Chuang 2021's theme song into Ableton so I could have the midi track! That was something I was very worried about, but it turned out well in the end.

Five Shades of Home: This was my piece for the Chinese Diaspora event. I had actually forgotten what I had written, but I recently went back to reread it and I was surprised by how well I was able to intertwine the themes of family, grief, and different kinds of love into the fic! I wrote it around this time last year, so i had forgotten so much about it. But yay for cooking with your family and difficult conversations about grief!

root your love a little deeper: I wrote this as a pinch-hit with like 3 days?? for a remix event. It was my first time writing sci-fi and I had to come up with a bunch of worldbuilding as I went, but I ended up really happy about the overall fic and how I kept the themes of the original while putting my own spin on things. It was one I've read back a few times and still enjoy a lot!

your heart of shadows, your eyes like stars: This was the first fic I ever posted as a WIP (because I have a terrible fear of not finishing a fic I started) and it helped me get over a lot of anxiety around expectations/my working speed/etc. I was super surprised at how many people like it! It started out as a horny short scene, but then i had to fill in the backstory to get to where I wanted to go. It developed a much bigger plot than I anticipated, but I'm proud I pulled it off in the end! I'm also glad I got to explore some of the interesting parts of omegaji and the juiciness of LWJ's character against societal expectations of gender roles, love, and duty. I haven't read back over it yet, but it was a really fun experience (and I didn't have to edit the entire fic all at once, which was nice).

Your top 4 current WIPs that you’re excited to release in the new year:

Secret bottomji big bang fic: Ooooh I'm so excited about this! I'm about 20k into it with an expected word count of around 60k. This could likely balloon because the plot got more complex, but that's ok! It's still a secret, but let's just say it incorporates some of my fave AU elements and I'm going way too hard on the structure of the fic lol.

Modern cultivation/poetry AU: This was my Nano project in November for a lack of other things to work on, but I'm hoping to release it this year! This started out as a modern with cultivation AU that would be released simultaneously with a "book" of poetry that LWJ either writes or studies from. I love the idea of making the reference material for within a fic and it isn't something I've seen that often! I don't know if I'm explaining it well, but it's me working on a fic + a poetry collection as LWJ at the same time. The cultivation part has taken over it, so I'm not quite sure how I'm gonna write myself out of this hole but oh well, I'm the author!

Wangxian incense burner CNC fic: set in a dream of the Cloud Recesses era where LWJ does WWX exactly as hard as he deserves lol. Inspired by maotuan's uncensored panels and WWX's talk about "why didn't you take me back then, you should have held me down and forced me, etc."

A non wangxian secret exchange fic: My first time (in this fandom) writing a non-wangxian main pairing! Details are still a secret, but I look forward to stretching my fingers into exploring other characters and dynamics.

Your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year:

Biggest is writing at all! I had not written prose for fun in over a decade when I rejoined fandom in late 2020, and I had barely started writing again. Fandom, writing, and podfic helped pull me out of a few months of really bad depression early in the year and it's given me comfort that I can make it through even the hardest of times. I've managed to keep writing despite other things in life going wrong and I'm super proud I've kept this up because writing was one of the first things I ever loved!

My dialogue writing has gotten way better! I struggled with it so much in late 2020 and everything felt awkward and stilted. I still struggle with it at times, but I've been able to make it sound more natural than when I started!

Using an outline: I thought I was a pantser, but I never managed to finish any longer prose works I started in the past. I started actually outlining my ideas and writing in plot details, which seemed to be the secret for solving my never-finishes-any-writing self.

Your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year:

Figure out how to make transitions less awkward/use fewer time skips. If I'm using timeskips, make them feel suitable for the tempo of the work.

Manage time a little better - plan out which events/fics I'm gonna release rather than jumping on anything that looks good! And also finishing drafts in time so I don't make my betas work so hard (deep gratitude for everyone who has beta'd my stuff lol).

Your number 1 favorite line you’ve written this year!

Ok a little cheating, but I'm putting in the entire paragraph with my fave line (aka two lines lol) highlighted. This is from chapter 14 of Collateral Circulation and is from Yu Ziyuan's letter to Wei Ying. I love Yu Ziyuan as a character; I find her so emotionally complex and compelling. She may not be someone I like, but I think she serves to highlight how multifaceted one person can be.

Yanli loves you dearly. Jiang Cheng does too. Both of my children, whom I fought for tooth and nail, love you as if you were the centre of our family. Unlike Jiang Cheng, Yanli is soft and loving, more than I could ever be. She’s been the perfect mother despite her youth. I see so little of myself in her that I wonder if she’s really mine, and then I see her stubborn love and I know that she is exactly like her mother. If I could excise the love from my heart, I would. She nurtures it instead.

And that's a wrap. Thanks for reading if you've read it this far! =D

#mdzs #fandom #writer retrospective #how much can I talk about my own work in one go

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witchhatgnat · 1 year

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Check out my work!

Since I'm new to Tumblr I thought it would be cool to throw some links to my work out there. For those who don't know, I'm a student author and game developer and I've been active online for about two years now. I don't have links to my fiction quite ready yet but I do have links to the games I've worked on! So here are those along with a little pitch.

First up is The Pieces: I worked on this one last summer and it was my first time as the lead designer for a project! It's a short narrative game about a recently divorced person taking items from their old apartment. The game focuses on some really amazing music from the sound team and encourages players to build a song reflective of the character's emotional state. I think it's a unique narrative piece with some of my strongest writing.

Next I want to talk about what is by far my most popular game, Hearts of Hallow's Eve: Do you like ghosts and ghouls? Mothmen and vampires? Well this is the game for you. It's a Halloween themed dating-sim with a little twist. You're at a party where everyone's costume is a little too convincing. You can pick from four fiendish friends to talk to, including Mothman, Chadimir the Vampire, Franky the Cultist, and Echo the Ghost. This one is just really cute. The artists did an absolutely amazing job and I'm so happy that I got to write for Mothman. It's silly, it's sweet, and it's totally worth a look.

Next up is Field Hospital: Valkyrie, which I made with the same team as The Pieces. This time around we were making a game for GMTK Jam, and so there's a lot more mechanical crunch here. You play as the commanding officer of a M*A*S*H-style hospital in a sci-fi war. You're tasked with doing triage, managing your medical staff, and making sure that enough soldiers live each day. The main game play thrust involves dice rolls to see whether or not your staff can save the soldier they've been assigned to. Everyone also has a morale meter that's affected by whether or not they saved their patient the previous day. It's an extremely difficult game (not by design lol), but thematically I think it works really well. I'm proud of the writing I did for this, including some vague world building and random-generator lists I had to come up with. There's also more amazing music and sound design in this one.

The last one I want to talk about is Getting Ahead, which is my earliest game. It's a Twine text adventure where you play as a shade waiting in line in Purgatory. Except, you're not going to actually wait in line are you? Of course not. You begin cutting in front of people and meeting some really interesting characters. But as you do, something feels... wrong. I think this one is really funny and a little spooky, but mostly funny. It has some absolutely amazing music (including a Bloodborne style opening theme). It's also the only game that I've been the "programmer" for, and getting music to work in Twine was not fun! Years later and I'm still really proud of this one.

That's all I'll link to for now. But I have worked on two other dating-sims, which you can find on my Itch page at witchhatnatalie.itch.io. Feel free to ask questions about these projects or share your thoughts! I hope people enjoy them and I can't wait to get back to making games.

#gaming #gamedev #indiegamedev #indie game #game design #game development #game developers #walking simulator #narrative #narrative game #video game music #dating sim #visual novel #mothman #vampire game #m*a*s*h #science fiction #purgatory #twine game

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wannabemobwife · 3 years

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Guns, Glamour, and Goodfellas - Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Sucker for Pain

Dad!Mob!Tom Holland x Mom!Mob!Reader

Pairings: Tom Holland x Reader, Rosie Holland x Henry Osterfield

Warnings: Guns (its in the title lol), grief, a minor mention of blood, fighting, always angst (what I consider angst)

Words: 4.1K

Author note: Totally cried while writing this. Feel free to leave comments or message me directly your feelings while reading the chapter. Always love hearing from you guys.

Chapter 5: Sucker for Pain

Words: 4.1K

Word of Charlotte’s death had spread like wildfire, especially at school. Only Rosie was attending the past fews days. Parker set to join her in two days time, after the funeral, he was scared of what lied ahead. Parker was discharged from the hospital a few days ago, under strict instructions to rest. He started to go a little stir crazy, watching the days pass.

Most of the student’s attended the funeral. Charlotte’s demise was widely publicized which made Parker’s blood boil. No one knew her like Parker did. Who Charlotte actually was the complete opposite of the persona she put on in public and at school. Charlotte was secretly funny and enjoyed really cheesy corny jokes. Her sense of humor was one of things that made Parker fall in love with her.

All the Hollands attended. You, Tom, Rosie, and Parker, and hoped to pay your respects. Parker was exhausted, he had been going through the stages of grief. How could his life get so screwed in a matter of a few weeks. A couple weeks ago, he was a kid planning his promposal for his girlfriend and now he is a protégé of the biggest mob in London who was about to bury his girlfriend.

This was the final stage, the one he was dreading the most, acceptance. He didn’t want to let her go. Charlotte changed his world for the better. She was the first person he ever loved and loved him in return.

The denial didn’t last long. It was unfathomable how she no longer existed. How the world wouldn’t be blessed with her beautiful smile anymore. Or her corny sense of humor and gracious presence. How could someone so perfect just leave the world so suddenly.

Bargaining followed next, coupled with anger. Parker was angry at the world, God, himself, and the bastards that killed her. If they had only driven home when he wanted to, she would still be here. If he hadn’t gotten grounded and not overslept and cleaned up quick enough. If he hadn’t thrown that stupid party. If his dad never gave him an ultimatum. If he never turned 16. Even if he never existed in the first place, Charlotte would still be alive.

There are 5 stages of grief as if you move on from one to the next but no, they stick with people. Especially, depression and anger. How does anyone ever really get over death. Losing someone you love is greatest pain ever felt. Someone you held and protected. Losing Charlotte, in that moment Parker wasn’t good enough. Not enough to protect her or love her.

Bringing us up to date, acceptance. He wasn’t ready to say goodbye but since when did he start getting what he wanted. Parker stood like a statue as he watched Charlotte’s casket lower in to the ground. He knew he had to be strong not just for himself, but for everyone else, especially Charlotte’s parents. At the reception, Parker tried to speak to them but, he didn’t know what to say. How could he lie to them saying it was an accident when in reality he was the reason.

“You have some real nerve showing up here,” Mr. Owens said as Tom walked up to the grieving parents. “I was so sorry to hear about Charlotte, Mrs. Owens,” Tom explained. “You daft prick, you were there. You could’ve protected her,” screamed Mrs. Owens to Parker.

“Mrs. Owens, I just came to offer my condol—“ Parker tried to say.

“Fuck your condolences!” She yelled, throwing her daiquiri straight on Parker. Coating him, from head to toe, in a very potent alcoholic drink.

“I think what my son is trying to explain is that if you need anything, money or a favor, it would be our pleasure. Our family business has some important ties.” Tom exclaimed, hoping to bring them some peace. “You and your son end lives. That’s your family business. I want no part of it. Now if you don’t mind, please get out of my fucking way.” Mrs. Owens said, pushing her way past Tom.

“You people have too many strings. I just want my baby girl back, and you can’t do that,” screamed Mrs. Owens as she left the premises.

“Sir, you want me to take care of her?” asked William, Tom’s capo. “Leave her alone, she’s grieving. Parker come on, let’s go home and get you cleaned up,” Tom explained.

“She’s right. If it weren’t for me Charlotte would still be alive.” Parker said solemnly. Tom hated seeing his son like this, it was eating him up inside. Tom couldn’t do anything to stop it, it was up to Parker to face his inner demons.

The Holland household was starting to return to normalcy, at least what they called normalcy. Parker refused to leave his room for awhile. Staff and you would bring food up to his room each meal and take the untouched one from before. He was a shell of a person after the night. All the while Parker was getting over Charlotte, Rosie was getting under someone new.

Henry had been coming over frequently for two reasons. To comfort Parker in his time of need and to be with Rosie. Their love for each other blossomed rather quickly. Rosie was not one for big romantic gestures, but made an exception from Henry.

The day had come where Parker was to return to school. How could face all of them with the judgements and accusations. Charlotte’s death shook everyone to their very core, everyone was taking the news differently. It wasn’t common for the school community to lose on of their own. Maybe a teacher but never a student.

There were a multitude of mourners that ranged from the fake asses who say they knew her but didn’t, her former conquests who only saw her as a good fuck and her actual friends who were devastated. Posters were hung up and there were candles, teddy bears and “We miss you cards,” displayed all over her locker.

You drove them to school that morning, since Parker was still grounded. Arriving at school, all voices ceased to exist as the black Rolls Royce pulled up. Out jumped Parker and Rosie and all eyes shifted to them as they walked through the halls.

“Glad to see you are back Mr. Holland. You missed a few projects, you can make them up at a later time,” Ms. Erikson, Parker’s chemistry teacher, said. Parker just nodded in response.

Walking to his seat, he perfectly heard all the rumors being spread or was he supposed to. “I heard he was the one who killed her.” “I heard they were both at a gang bang” “I heard she died in his arms”. How could people be so insensitive to make snap judgements like that.

Charlotte’s parents’ opted for the cause of her death to remain hidden. But they were teenagers, they couldn’t help but, gossip. Rumors are just rumors, Parker would tell himself. They weren’t entirely wrong. He was the reason, he was there when it happened, and he held her as she died. Being in those hollowed halls was brutal. Parker was basically the new social pariah.

The student’s weren’t oblivious to the Holland family. They knew what most people knew. That Tom Holland owned one of the largest exporting companies in Europe, Holland Exportation and Luxuries. And they knew not to mess with the Hollands.

Once class was over, now came the hard work. Tom called it “Mobster Bootcamp,” Parker was currently taking lessons with his dad to carry on the legacy. Tom had a few tricks of the trade up his sleeve desperately wanting to pass on to his son. They had met in the Tom’s office to begin.

“Lesson 1: Always wear black or white.” Tom started with as Parker took notes, like the perfect student he is.

With one, blood will alter it completely and the other remains unchanged. It was a common theme, with the Holland legacy, wearing black or white. It was sleek, dangerous and classy all at the same time.

“The one big perk is that blood doesn’t show up on black fabric.”

“Lesson 2: Wives must be treated with respect, girlfriends are fair game."

“If you’re a good man, the only describable difference between a wife and girlfriend is that one has an unnecessary symbol on her ring finger. They both mean the same and don’t you forget it,” Tom concluded.

And Tom was a good man. Never has Tom even thought about cheating on you. Porn was pointless and strip clubs bored him. Why throw away the best thing that ever happened to him, you.

“Lesson 3: Someone brings a knife, you bring a gun” “Never be without a weapon. Anything can become a weapon with the right skill set, but always be prepared.”

Tom was a big fan of improvisation. Sometimes using what he had on hand, like his tie. Strangling wasn’t his most favorite method of killing but he liked to mix it up.

“Also find finesse in your kills. Your mother is a big believer in gun to the head, execution style. Me on the other hand, I prefer to roughen up a guy a bit, but you will eventually develop an M.O. (modus operandi). Another lesson, make sure you don’t always use the same M.O. mix it up a bit, otherwise they could trace it back to you,” Tom elaborated.

“That bring me to my next lesson.”

“Lesson 4: Blackmail is your best friend.”

Tom has had a few close calls in his day. Everything about running a mob had to be sneaky. Bodies couldn’t be found by any random person, they needed to be cleaned up and dealt with. The witness’s in a meeting were sworn into secrecy, he had enough dirt on them that he could get someone to fake their death if need be. Cops were never a problem with the Hollands. They were his puppets and he was the puppet master.

“Killing someone in a public place you risk being caught by an innocent bystander. Then one things leads to another and you are cleaning up two bodies instead of one.That’s why I have the warehouse and the police Captain in my pocket. Just remember everyone’s got a price,” Tom explained.

“Lesson 5: Have as little weaknesses as possible.”

Tom hated referring to the one’s he loved as weakness but it was the truth. He couldn’t be weak if he desired to be top dog. The moment you and Tom started a family, his liabilities increased. From that day, his only goal was to protect you and the twins.

“I would never call your mother a weakness, but I would die for her. Also for you and your sister. This makes me vulnerable. In the past, people have put her in danger situations for leverage against me.” Tom said, rubbing his temples. Parker just nodded in return. A long silence ensued.

“Dad, are you okay?” Parker questioned.

“Yeah. I’m sorry son, I have more for you but, just have a lot on my mind,” Tom apologized. “It’s alright. Any luck with finding Charlotte’s killer?” Parker asked, his voice tainted with hope.

“No, but I do have a meeting at the warehouse with a contact would you like to tag along?”

“How could I say no,” Parker said, kind of excitedly. They made their way out of the mansion and drove to the warehouse. Parker had never been here before. It was dark and cold looking. The walls were pure metal sheets and the floor had stains of blood scattered everywhere. “Good to see you, Jazz,” Tom said walking up to the mysterious woman tied to a chair. Jasmine Ramsey, a contract killer Tom was friends with. A little more than friends at one time, predating you.

“Fuck you, Tom. What’d I do to be graced with your presence,” questioned Jazz. “Nothing to piss me off, yet,” Tom chuckled. “Then why the fuck am I here,” she said a little peeved.

“My son, here, needs to ask you a few questions,” Tom said, pointing towards Parker who stood in the corner. “Aww a baby Holland. Following in your daddy’s footsteps, huh?” “Shut it, slag,” Parker yelled as he melded his fist with her jaw.

“Jesus. What the fuck was that for?” Jazz screeched. “Woah. Sorry Jazz, should’ve told him you were an old friend,” Tom says, holding his hands up in defense. “Oh, I’m so sorry miss. Could I get you some ice or something?” Parker exclaimed, surprised that he just punched an assassin.

“Its fine didn’t hurt that bad. Gotta work on your punch,” she said adjusting her jaw. “Really. Hurt like a bitch to me” Parker whispered, holding his aching hand. Blood began to seep out of the broken skin, staining his knuckles red. “Tommy you gotta tell your son to grow tougher skin” Jazz exclaimed. “What the fuck were you thinking Parker?” Tom said, grabbing Parker by the collar of his polo. “Sorry I just assumed with her being tied up and all” Parker exclaimed. “That’s how we do business boy. You’ll soon learn”Jazz explained with a shit-eating grin across her face.

“Anyway, I need info on a murder at The Luxe on the 11th. A young girl was involved.” Tom turned to Jazz.

“Oh I heard about that, poor girl, she was pretty too. What’s it to you, Holland?”

“That’s not important,” Tom hissed. “She was my girlfriend,” Parker interrupted.

“Sorry lover boy my hands are tied, literally,” Jazz said, rolling her eyes. “If I untie you will you talk?” Tom replied.

“Yes, you know me. I don’t appreciate being threatened.” “Alright Jazz, just spit it out.” Tom said as Parker untied her restraints. “I was downtown at pub, called Harmon’s. Heard of it?” Jazz expressed. “Yeah, a big hotspot for Shaw’s men,” Tom said, nodding his head as he followed along. “Well, I was searching for my target and overheard some men saying “It’s going down tonight, word from the Merchant is that he should be there, with his little whore.”” “Fuck. The Merchant. Where have I heard that?” Tom said, puzzled. “Short for Merchant of Death. Surely, you’ve heard the old mob tales.” Jazz elaborated.

“Of course.”

“Well if it is him, I’d stop looking you don’t want to find him,” she warned. “Please, everyone knows I’m fucking top dog,” Tom asserted. “Don’t get your panties in a bunch, Tommy. You are now, but he used to be and if he is returning, watch your back. All he craves is power. If that’s it I’ll be on my way.” Jazz explained, asking for permission to leave. “Yes of course, Jazz. Thanks.” Tom muttered. “Give my love to your wife,” she said, pressing a cheek to his kiss as she strutted out. “Seriously dad?” Parker asked with a side glare. “Parker stop it. I love your mother and I would never cheat on her. Jazz and I are just friends.” Tom explained creating a “I’m watching you” look on Parker’s face.

“Jesus, one punch ripped open your knuckles. You're the one telling mom. Now come on or we’ll be late for dinner,” Tom said, inspecting Parker’s hand. Being the new mob boss was in Parker’s blood, but you were always against it. You loved the mob and being part of it but you wanted your kids to have a choice, unlike you and Tom.

Meanwhile at the manor, you and Rosie were making dinner. You appreciated all the staff to clean and cook but, enjoyed the satisfaction when doing it yourself. Secretly loving your independence. While you were dating Tom, you would try to ditch your security much to Tom’s dismay. You were a junkie for thrills.

Rosie and your relationship is what ever mother desired. You treated Rosie like a daughter first and a best friend second. As long as Rosie’s life was never put in danger you would keep her secrets. The major one being Henry.

“Hey honey. Since it’s just us here, how are things going with Henry?” You asked curiously. “Wait, where’s dad and Parker?” Rosie questioned cause nobody else knew. “Taking care of some business. Now spill, I want all the details.” “Well things are going really great. We kissed.” “Really? When? Where?” You have always wanted to have this conversation with her daughter. “At the hospital when Parker was hurt. I had a panic attack and Henry comforted me. He is really great, mom. I don’t know I’ve just never felt this way before,” she explained. Rosie had boyfriends in the past, never long enough for anything serious to perspire.

“Roo if you’re ready to take that step, I’m here for you. You can tell me anything.”

“I’m okay, right now, considering”

“Considering what? Did something happen? Has Henry been pressuring you?” You grew concerned of your daughter. “No. God no, nothing like that. On the night of the party, I got drunk and remember that boy Connor?”

“Yes, go on.” “Well he… he tried to rape me.” Rosie murmured, trying not to cry. “What? Roo why didn’t you tell me,” you whispered, your heart breaking on behalf of Rosie. “Henry was there to stop it and I just want to forget about.” “Roo, I’m so sorry you had to deal with this. I’m always here for you ok? I love you so much baby.” “Love you too, mom” Rosie replied. Their conversation soon quickly ended as Tom and Parker came barging through the front door and Rosie excused her self to the restroom.

“Ooo, something smells good. What is my beautiful wife cooking?” Tom asked, coming up behind you and kissing your neck.

“The only thing she knows how to cook, spaghetti and meatballs,” you replied, jokingly.

“How was your guy’s day?” You asked. “Great, Parker really showed them,” Tom said, kissing your forehead and pulling you into a warm embrace.

“Jesus Parker, does it hurt?” you questioned as he showed her his battle scars.

“What the fuck happened to your hand?” Rosie said, walking back into the kitchen. “Oh nothing,” Parker said, trying to change the subject. Rosie just gave him a puzzling glare as she dropped the subject.

“Dinner’s ready,” you announced as they all made their way to the dining room. There they sat at the long table, Tom at the head of course and you to the right of him. You all talked about your day, of course, avoiding any mob talk.

“So what really happened to your hand” Rosie asserted breaking the silence. “Drop it. Will you?” Parker barked annoyed at her persistence. “Fine,” she said staring at her plate until her phone buzzed. That noise put a smile across her face because it was always the same person, Henry. “Roo, you know the rules. No phones at dinner,” you remarked. “I know mom, just give me one second,” replied Rosie, holding up a finger. “Rosie, your mother asked you to put it down. Who’s got you so giddy anyway.” Tom said, defending you.

“Oh nothing” Rosie muttered, putting her phone down. “Ten bucks it’s a boy” Tom said directed towards you. “Deal” you responded, shaking his hand. He brought her hand to his lips and pressed a chaste kiss, theirs loving way of shaking hands.

“I’m done. Dinner was great, thanks mom. May I be excused?” Parker asked and Tom nodded in response. Rosie cornered him on his way upstairs. It had been a while since they had talked. Sibling to sibling. Twin to twin. They tried not to keep secrets from each other. He hadn’t of told her about the mob and she hadn’t told him of her and Henry.

“Now tell me what the fuck you did to your hand,” Rosie barked, cornering him.

“Why the fuck do you want to know so bad?” Parker responded. “Umm, I’m your sister.”

“Rosie I don’t have time for your bullshit,” Parker yelled. “What the fuck happened? There’s something you aren’t telling me,” Rosie accused.

“Dad wants me to be the next him.” Parker explained. “I’m not following. What like run the company?” Rosie asked, confused by his statement.

“No. Dad is a mobster. He runs a mob and he wants me to succeed him.” “What the fuck? When did this happen? Why the fuck haven’t you told me?” Rosie exclaimed.

“Our birthday. This is what I was trying to tell you at the party!” Parker yelling causing Rosie to yell back. “Sorry, I was a little preoccupied and so were you!” Rosie hinting at Charlotte. “Don’t turn this on me. What the fuck are you doing with Henry, by the way? You think I don’t see the two of you sneaking around.” Parker quipped, in reality he had never seen their antics. “Nothing, it’s none of your business,” Rosie said, shying away from him. “Of course, it’s my business he’s my best friend.” “Well he is mine too and the world doesn’t revolve around you. If you weren’t so busy breaking curfew and sneaking out, you would see that Henry is really good to me, ever since that night.” Rosie explained stopping herself before she said something she wasn’t ready to acknowledge herself.

“Rosie, what happened?” Parker asked noticing her quick change in demeanor.

“You won’t care,” Rosie quipped.

“Try me,” Parker said softly.

“That night… someone slipped something in my drink and tried to take advantage of me, but Henry stopped it.” Rosie explained, trying to avoid the brute of Parker’s rage.

“Who? Tell me who right fucking now!”

“Connor.”

“I’m gonna kill him” “No, Henry already took care of it. You already have enough blood on your hands,” Rosie chuckled, surprised Parker cared that much. “Thanks,” he said with sarcasm.

“Roo, I’m so sorry. I should’ve known.” “It’s ok. I’m just trying to put it behind me”

“So what you are a mobster now?” “One in training. I need you to know I’m doing this for one reason only, to avenge Charlotte, okay. Not looking to kill for sport like mom and dad.”

Rosie’s suspicions grew over the years that her parents did enjoy living above the law. It didn’t bother her, she actually hoped the mantle would be passed on to her. She had a more fiery spirit than Parker, he was just a big softie on the inside much like his father. Appearances can be deceiving.

Tom was currently in his office, finishing up work for the night. Buzz, buzz, buzz. The last person he thought would call him, his dad.

“So are you going to say thanks?” asked Dom.

“For what? I don’t time for your antics, dad. A hit was hired on Parker and I have to figure out who did it.” Tom sighed. He was frustrated he was getting no where, who was the Merchant of Death. “Umm, hello. Like I said you’re welcome,” Dom quipped.

“You fucking mean that was you.”

“Duh, told you he needed a push in the right direction. I wasn’t the one to pull the trigger but I knew where he was.” “I have a crushed kid over here wanting revenge on the bastards who killed his girlfriend.” “Problem solved, glad he is joining the family business.” Dom said and hung up. How the fuck was Tom going to explain to Parker that his grandpa arranged the hit?

“FUCK!!” Tom screamed smashing everything in sight.

Meanwhile, Parker made his way to the kitchen for a glass of water when he saw you sitting on the couch, consumed in your book.

“Hey mom?” Parker asked, needing to get something off his chest. “Yeah, honey,” you responded, drawing your eyes away from your book. “I need to tell you something.”

“I’m listening… wait what the fuck was that. Hold that thought.” You hesitated when you heard a large crash come from Tom’s office.

“Let me go check on your father,” you said, getting up from the couch. Parker couldn’t help but be curious. He followed her before she closed the door and listened in, pressing his ear against the door.

“Tommy, what happened?” You queried. “It was him,” Tom spoke with an unchanging expression. “Who, Carson?” “No, Dom. He arranged the hit,” Tom said.

Parker’s heart sunk to his stomach. His girlfriend was dead because of his family. He really did kill her.

Maybe he wasn’t the one who pulled the trigger but she was seen with him. As far as he is concerned it painted a huge red target on her back. What kind of life was he born into? He never wanted any of this and now all he is, is this.

Guns, Glamour, and Goodfellas Masterlist

Taglist: @thenoddingbunny-blog @adriannauni @dummiesshort

#tom holland #tom holland imagines #tom holland series #tom holland fanfic #tom holland mob au #tom holland au #tom holland x reader #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland blurb #mob!tom #mob tom #mob!tom holland #dad!mob!tom holland #mob!tom x mob!reader #mob!tom x reader #mob!tom holland x reader #dad!mob!tom

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darker-soft-starker · 4 years

Photo

Starker High School AU, Pt. 2 (Pt. 1, Pt. 3, Pt. 4, Pt. 5)

-----

Peter will admit that during he took an extended moment during his journey home to grieve the loss of his free afternoon, and indeed the impending headaches.

And the rest of his future, if he was honest.

Not that Peter was prone to melancholy by any means, but with this assignment his fate was officially sealed, there was no misunderstanding. He was going to fail this assignment. He was going to, for the first time in his academic career, be forced to submit garbage of a caliber worthy of Tony Stark. It will forever be a black mark on his academic record.

No respectable college is going to accept him after this. In fact, he might as well drop out of school now and hit up Mr Delmar for a job. All of his prep for his MIT application is as good as useless after this. Extracurriculars? Goodbye.

Because it’s confirmed.

He’s doomed.

Swaying with the motions of the train, Peter types a text to Ned, the only person who might provide him with some much needed sympathy.

> I’m doomed > paired w/stark for an assignment lollllllllll. > help

Maybe Peter could trade with Ned. Maybe he could plead with their teacher, for honest fear of his life and scholastic integrity. He wasn’t even exaggerating. In no known iteration of this universe could Peter amicably work with Tony Stark. It would be like Harry Potter sitting down for tea with Voldemort, or Frodo and Sauron chilling with a pint and a pipe in Bag End.

It was unthinkable. Implausible. Laughable.

And Peter would laugh, were it anyone but him in this situation.

The feeling is unusual. Never had he found reason in his life to truly dislike anybody before, everyone could be redeemed or given the opportunity for penance. Natasha has said more than once that Peter would offer the devil himself a sandwich if he appeared.

Tony Stark on the other hand? No sandwich for him.

Well, maybe a slice of bread. A stale one.

While he waits for Ned to responds he catches sight of his injured reflection in the train window, which is admittedly pretty gnarly. Even with his hood drawn up, there was a noticeable berth allocated to him in the busy carriage between himself and the other passengers.

< sux. can I have ur lego hogwarts if u die?

> dude :( pity me.

< lol. so, can i?

Peter sighs.

> sure. Look after May for me, bro. delete my internet history.

< deal. godspeed

Pocketing his phone, Peter wonders if it’s too late to take up praying.

---

By the time he’s back in his apartment his mood has managed to swing back up.

Tony Stark is not going to be the arbiter of Peter’s fate. Hell no. He’s smart, he’s creative and hardworking - it isn’t up to anybody but Peter to determine his outcomes. If he has to do the assignment with Stark then he will. And he will work his hardest.

If he has to do it sharing the credit with Stark, well, Peter knows a concession when he sees one.

No matter how reluctant he is.

But he powers through it, like ripping off a bandaid. It’s fine! He’s a Parker and he’s come this far in life already against ill, Parker-like odds. What was being paired for one assignment with someone who escaped the nearest hellmouth?

It’ll be fine.

Probably.

Not letting himself linger on his fears, Peter clears out his previous plans of going on a YouTube spiral and eating sour gummies until his teeth stick, instead utilising the time to get his foot in and and begins prepping for the assignment. Cursory, preliminary research at first, before the inevitable deep dive begins.

Neanderthal, Peter scoffs, mad all over again. Who is Stark to call Peter a neanderthal? He’s second in his class. He’s a straight A student. He likes school.

And as much as he is moderately skilled in, and enjoys JV, it’s not like he received his scholarship to study at Midtown based on his physical prowess.

The graze on his cheek that stings every time he yawns is proof of that.

Stark can eat his entire ass and choke on it, he thinks darkly, as he continues his research. He doesn’t know the first thing about Peter.

The data is sobering as he delves into job listings and statistics of his projected salary in a three year margin. This is really what his teachers earn? Wow. Depressing.

The contrast of expected salary versus the forecast of steep student loans is disheartening further still.

Teaching quietly slips from second to third on his list of ideal occupations.

Turning on a playlist on his phone, Peter continues to compile notes, amassing a truly gargantuan amount of tabs on his browser. His computer, old enough to be on its’ last teeth, whirrs loudly in protest.

It’s not until his room goes dark that he thinks to check the time.

Ah, shit. It’s nearly six.

Peter pauses. Should he tidy up the apartment?

...Nah, no point in breaking a sweat for Stark.

He continues typing. Then he hesitates, fingers suspended in mid-air.

But what if Stark sees his unfolded laundry out on the dining table and publicly shames him for his old-but-comfortable Bulbasaur themed boxer shorts?

Goddamnit.

---

A quick, cursory clean ensues and leaves a relatively orderly Parker apartment. No freshly laundered underwear is in sight.

Peter wraps up just a few minutes before six. Right on time.

Taking a seat at the now clear dining table Peter drums his fingers on the surface and waits.

And waits.

---

He knows when Tony finally arrives when he hears the sound of a car pulling up outside his apartment block. The riffs of a Roxette remix can be heard playing loudly from the ground to the seventh floor of his apartment, the bass so thunderous it reverberates the windows all the way up to his floor.

Drumming his fingers on the kitchen table, Peter checks the wall clock again. It’s nearly seven.

Tony’s late.

Not that Peter is particularly affected with surprise that Tony is incapable of following basic instructions, but still. Really? Really?

By the time there is a knock on his door, Peter is already before it, his arms crossed over his chest and a scowl on his face. Every second between Tony pulling up and his ascent to Peter’s floor has him positively fuming. He can’t believe how this day played out. It started with such promise. He had such innocuous, but high hopes.

Clearly, he miscalculated.

Feeling a touch petty, he waits to answer, listening to Stark knock a second and then a third, more insistent time before he rouses enough calm to open the door.

He instantly regrets it when he does.

Tony’s expression is curious one as he breezes right passed Peter without waiting for further invitation. There’s a smudge of something dark on his brow, his otherwise white undershirt smeared in dark stains.

Peter watches incredulously as the other boy drops his backpack by the door with a thump.

“You’re late.”

He closes the door behind Tony and scowls at the other boys easy posture, hands shoved into his pockets, eyes taking in the apartment.

“I didn’t realise you lived all the way out in fucking Queens. Do you have any idea how bad traffic is at this time of day? Also, your elevator doesn’t work. I just climbed seven flights of stairs, where’s the hospitality?”

“Try earning it.”

The other boy rolls his eyes. “Like it’s worth my time.” He breezes past Peter and slides his leather jacket off his arms, tossing it atop of his backpack in the corner. “Look, I’m here now. Okay? You can unclench now. So, do I get a tour or what?”

“Or what. This wouldn’t have been an issue if we had just started straight after class like I said.”

“Oh I’m sorry,” Tony clutches his hands to his heart before gesturing to the room. “I didn’t realise I was interrupting your busy Friday night, Parker. You got a keg and the rest of the meatheads stashed away somewhere?”

Without waiting for a response, Tony wanders around the living room like a curious child in a new play room. His gaze inspects everything all at once, from peering at up close at the wall mounted photos and hovering his grubby hands over the oddments and knick-knacks speckled throughout the space.

Apprehensive, Peter can’t help but shadow him, afraid he just let loose a hurricane in a china shop.

Without asking, Tony picks up May’s old Magic 8-Ball and gives it a good shake. Peter’s fingers itch to reach over and stop him, but stops himself because then that would require actually making direct skin contact the other boy.

Not worth it.

“Cannot predict now. Huh,” Tony says to himself before placing the ball back in the wrong spot.

They both watch silently as it rolls precariously close to the edge.

“Anyways,” Tony helps himself to an armchair, lounging back and spreading his legs wide. “I know your long-term memory is probably as defective as the rest of you, so don’t strain yourself recalling that I had other priorities.”

“Like what?”

“Like literally anything that isn’t being around you,” the other boy grins. “Now, are we doing this thing, or did you invite me over so you could bitch at me?”

“I didn’t invite you,” Peter grumbles, swiping his notebook from the dining table before sitting on the sofa, as far away from Stark as possible. Shifting, he takes his phone from his pocket and opens the notes he’d taken earlier.

“So, I cross referenced some websites and current job listings,” Peter scrolls through his research, adjusting his glasses as they slip down his nose. “Assuming you have no savings, we’re looking at an average of sixty-thousand per annum based on my salary alone. The average rent in --”

“-- Uh, why are we assuming I have no savings?”

"Because... we’re being realistic?”

Tony springs to his feet and paces across the living room.

“Well,” he says, gesturing to Peter, “if we’re being realistic, does having no savings also that mean I have no debt -- or are you paying off two student loans on your salary?”

“I don’t --”

“Do we have car loans? Health insurance?”

“Wait, slow your roll, Stark. I haven’t yet --”

“-- Of course you haven’t. I mean really, Parker, do you ever think ahead? You should try it, we do have a baby on the way, you know.” Tony clicks his fingers and points at Peter. “Oh, names! I want to call it Molly.”

“As in the drug?”

“No, as in Ringwald. Anyhoo, seeing as only one of us has the intellectual capacity to construct a budget,” Tony gestures to himself, “that would be me, consider maybe that I spent my savings paying off my student loans and bought a car for me and Miss Molly, leaving you with just your own stagnant debt. Happy?”

“Thrilled,” he says through clenched teeth, feeling utterly steamrolled. “But we’re not calling the baby Molly.”

“Yes, we are. Think of all the great nicknames. Hey wait,” Tony pauses in his pacing, “are your parents going to be home soon?”

It was in that moment Peters world narrows down to one, botched cosmic joke.

Turning his gaze heavenwards, Peter prays silently for mercy. What did he do to deserve this. This is all his bad karma come at once. This is the bad place.

“Ah, no,” he replies, eyes widening. “No, my parents are not going to be home soon.”

“Cool. Lucky you.”

Oblivious to Peter’s existential turmoil, Tony resumes his patrol through the living room, picking up a frame on the mantle. It houses an old photo of Ben, May and a young, bespectacled Peter.

It is one of the more embarrassing immortalisations of his younger self, eleven-years old and grinning widely, bearing his silver braces to the camera as he holds up a science fair trophy, curls wild and untamed.

Oh god. That was exactly what Peter needed on this unholy day - Tony Stark in his living room, witnessing Peter in his prepubescent glory.

Quick, create a diversion.

“So, as I was saying,” he says loudly, “rent is reasonably affordable with a sixty-thousand budget in --”

“Who’s the babe?” Tony points to a younger Aunt May in the photo.

Peter gets to his feet and removes the frame from Tony’s grasp. He glowers as he places it back on the mantle.

“No one you would have a chance with. Can you stay focused? Like, are you physically capable of it?”

“Okay, calm down,” Tony holds his hands up in surrender. “You’ve got a lot of anger for someone so vertically challenged, you know that, shortstack?”

“Focus, dumbass.”

“I’m focused! Let’s see, we’ve established that I am excellent at managing my money. You have a shitty job and a shitty salary, and apparently my imaginary future self has terrible taste in men. So. Have I got that right? Where are we living?”

“Queens. LIC has some one bed, one baths that could be affordable.”

“Uh, rewind. Going to have to eighty-six that - I am not living in Queens.”

Peter stares at him.

Tony rubs his hands over his face and sighs. “Fine, whatever. But I want a Pontiac Firebird in this imaginary life if I have to deal with you.”

“For someone so keen on getting away you’re doing your best to prolong this experience. It’s literally painful.”

“Well, I just like to see you get all riled up, Princess,” Tony grins, leaning back against the mantle and folding his arms over his chest. “You have this vein that bulges on your forehead when you’re mad. Makes you look like a pitbull.”

Peter swallows the particularly acidic retort sitting on his tongue and tries not to let Tony’s words sting. Be the bigger man, Ben used to say. As difficult as it is to channel even a modicum of the mans’ eternal patience, Peter takes a deep breath and reminds himself to stay focused. The less he gets sidetracked by Tony’s fuckery, the sooner it’s over.

He mentions the next part with unease.

“...Miss Ahn said that we need references and should do field research. Speak to realtors. Ask people who have a similar lifestyle and budget.”

The look that comes over the other boys face is one of unequivocal revulsion. Peter can relate. The thought of having to spend more time with this guy makes his stomach turn.

“Well, Parker, any bright ideas who we can ask?”

The hinges of the front door squeaks before Peter can respond.

Moments after, Aunt May walks into the living room, placing her bag down on the dining table. She looks between the two boys curiously.

“Hey, Pete,” she comes to his side to squeezes his shoulder. “Who do we have here?”

Tony rushes over with his hand outstretched, an eager grin on his face.

“Tony Stark, ma’am. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“Oh, ah, okay, well,” May laughs as he enthusiastically shakes her hand. Her eyes are soft as Tony smiles brightly at her. “Nice to meet you too, Tony. I’m May, Peter’s aunt. Are you... friends with Peter?”

Peter snorts.

“Definitely not. We just have an assignment --”

“-- Great friends, actually,” Tony talks over him, taking a seat beside Peter on the sofa. To Peter’s utter disgust, the other boy puts an arm around his shoulders, squeezing his bicep encouragingly. “Aren’t we, Pete? Hmm? Best buds. We go way back.”

Peter freezes, feeling the line of heat from Tony’s against his side, the weight of his arm on his body.

Eyes widening, he feels his skin crawl.

“That’s sweet,” May smiles, putting her hair up in a loose, messy bun. “Well, I don’t know about you boys, but I’m starving. I’m ordering pizza, Friday special. You should stay for dinner, Tony.”

Tony places his free hand on his chest.

“I would be honoured.”

May looks at Tony strangely before retreating to the kitchen to retrieve the menus.

As soon as she’s out of sight Tony takes his arm off Peter and quickly shifts away from him like he’s been burned.

“Dude,” Peter whispers, bewildered. “What the fuck?”

“Oh my god,” Tony whispers, shuddering as his face scrunches up in disgust. “I’m going to have to pour scalding hot water on all the places your skin just touched me. Ugh, I feel like I just touched toe fungus.”

Peter slaps his arm.

“What is wrong with you?”

Tony backhands Peter’s arm in retaliation and then shudders all over again.

“Your aunt is crazy hot, okay, I couldn’t help myself. It was an instinctual reaction. Is she taken? C’mon. Vindicate me.”

“I’ll eviscerate you --”

“-- I mean, clearly she married into the family, she doesn’t share your unfortunate phenotype, but I didn’t see a ring on her finger. So? Yes or no?”

“You’re unbelievable,” Peter hisses as his aunt comes back in. “She’s not available to you. Not now, not ever.”

“But she is available?”

“Don’t even, Stark. You’re like, sixteen. Don’t you have any shame?”

Tony smiles, as she nears. “Not a shred.”

“So,” May waves a menu at them. “You boys happy with pepperoni?”

Closing his eyes, Peter wishes for death.

As fate would have it, he gets pepperoni instead.

-----

If you had ever told Peter that he would be sitting down for dinner with his Aunt and a dirt-streaked Tony Stark, he would have laughed.

And if Peter were outside himself he would probably find the sharing of pizza and soda over their plastic, chequered table-cloth comical -- in that uncanny, Dogs Playing Poker kind of way. But in reality there was nothing funny about the discomfort of having Tony in his personal space or the heavy, suffocating tension that has removed the air from the room.

The entire time Tony has been hamming it up, cracking jokes with his aunt, complimenting her on the decor, asking what she does for work. Peter doesn’t know if he’s being sweet to May for the purpose of buttering her up, or, given the wealth of his family in contrast to the Parkers, if he’s being cruelly facetious.

Nonetheless, Peter has felt on edge. It’s disconcerting, is what it is. Every single movement Tony makes, every time he opens his mouth -- frequently to sweet-talk his aunt -- has Peter’s anxiety standing at attention, hyperaware of everything the other boy does.

He’s beginning to feel like a meerkat whose den has been invaded by a lion.

Through the course of a single meal Peter’s attention moves from the sky to the floor. There is no grace or higher power that is coming to save him from this profound, unusual torture.

So he focuses his hopes to the south, seeing through their tiny, cramped, dinner table, past bargaining. He’s willing to trade his soul to end it all. Surely some wayward being from hell would come to his rescue.

May has Peter’s chin between her fingers. She turns it this way and that, inspecting his injuries.

“What happened this time, bubby?” She frowns, brow furrowing. “You look like you got beat up.”

Peter, very aware of Tony’s amused gaze on them, gently pulls away from her grasp. He smiles placatingly and picks at his pizza slice. God he’s never going to live this down.

“Training accident. It’s okay, I feel fine. ‘Tis but a scratch,” he brings himself to joke.

“You sure?”

“Yep.”

She leans in to kiss his cheek, carefully avoiding the fresh scabs and injured flesh. “God, you bruise like a peach. Be careful, baby, you’re our money maker,” she laughs. “What about you Tony, do you play football?”

Tony, who is mid way through chewing on a mouthful of pizza, momentarily chokes, beating his chest with his fist to swallow down the obstruction.

“Uh, no,” Tony gulps, wiping his mouth with a napkin. “Nope. No recreational sports for me. Can’t.” He gestures to his chest and sighs heavily. “Asthma.”

Peter sips his coke and rolls his eyes, knowing full well there’s a half-empty pack of Marlboro Light’s in the pocket of Tony’s jeans. Asthma. What a schmuck.

“That’s a shame. Do you boys have classes together?”

Unfortunately, Peter thinks.

The other boy seems to have the same thought, as he glares at Peter from over the table. When he picks up his can of coke, he gives Peter the finger outside of May’s eye-line.

“That’s why Tony’s here,” Peter twists his napkin in his grip. “We have an econ assignment together on microeconomics. Teach says Tony’s destined to be on welfare.”

Tony leans in, chin rested on his hand. He addresses May but his stare, dark and odious, rests on Peter.

“Not accurate. Stay-at-home parent, actually. One might say that is the most important job of all. Wouldn’t you agree, May?”

She raises her Coke.

“Hear, hear.”

Tony grins roguishly, the same grin he gave the girls at the lockers earlier. “Petey here was just saying that we should ask you about your experience running a household on a single salary. We’d love to have you as a reference.”

“Was I saying that?” Peter narrows his eyes. “I can’t remember.”

Tony kicks him under the table. The hit lands right in his knee cap.

Wincing, Peter kicks back, satisfied when the other boy bites his lip to hold back a pained groan.

“Yeah, well, not surprising,” Tony says airily, waving his hand. “Hit your head today, didn’t you? Maybe you should get all that damage looked into.”

The napkin rips in Peter’s grasp.

“Maybe you should go f--”

“I’d be more than happy to help with your assignment, boys,” May cuts in.

Whatever snide reply he has in his mouth instantly wilts when he looks over to his Aunt. She looks...pleased. Delighted, almost. Her eyes under the dull, yellow kitchen light seem to get warmer, and her smile is small but softens around the edges.

Instantly, Peter feels like the worst person in the world. Of course May would be the best person to ask. She does so much for him, the least he can do is set his pride aside for one moment to make her feel good about how hard she works for their life.

He reaches over to squeeze her hand, smiling as gratitude swells unexpectedly in his chest.

“Thanks, May. That would be great.”

Across the table, a smug Tony looks like the cat who got the cream.

Without warning, Peter’s chest goes hot with contempt, his fingernails dig into his palm. He’s not sure he’s ever met anyone he couldn’t like, until now.

I hate you, Peter mouths while May busies herself with rounding up the pizza boxes.

Kiss my ass, Tony mouths back.

In an instant his expression flips from contemptuous to angelic when he stands and offers to help May clean up.

Peter stands too, sparing a disdainful glance to the floor. Turns out not even the devil was willing to give him a hand.

Natasha was right. It’s going to end in murder.

---

Peter walks Tony to the door after dinner to say goodbye to his ‘friend’. Following him into the hall, Peter closes the door behind them.

“What do you want, Parker?” Tony asks wearily, retrieving a cigarette from his pocket. “I’m trying to make a getaway here.”

Peter crosses his arms over his chest. “Don’t do that with my aunt. I’m not joking, asshole. It’s not cool.”

“Relax, princess,” Tony rolls his eyes, fishing for his lighter in his backpack. “I’m not actually interested. Just trying to get under your skin. Worked, see? You’re easy like that. Hey, why do you live with your aunt anyways?”

“None of your business,” he frowns as Tony holds one hand up in surrender and lights his cigarette with the other. “Dude, you can’t smoke in here.”

“Can’t, shouldn’t, gonna. By the way, you’ve got sauce on your chin, it’s very distracting.”

Peter wipes at it without thinking. When he pulls it away there is indeed a smear of red sauce on his hand.

Tony walks backwards down the hall and exhales a cloud of smoke, waving in a sardonic imitation of a farewell.

“See you Monday, bubby.”

Peter doesn’t bother with a response, too tired from the week, exhausted by this whole darn day, and it’s not like the other boy cares what he has to say anyway. He takes a moment to swallow his anger before he heads back inside, sighing.

Well, at least he has an entire weekend free of Stark to look forward to.

May looks at him curiously when he reemerges, but says nothing. He considers for a moment about heading to his bedroom and playing a video game to disassociate - but then, suddenly, remembers her smile earlier, and how alone she looks now. A surge of affection hits him right beneath his breastbone.

He checks his watch and then catches her eye. Tilting his head towards the living room, he says, “Hey. You wanna eat some ice cream and watch some Colbert before bed?”

She smiles just like she did earlier and kisses his cheek. “Sounds nice, Pete.”

Maybe the whole day wasn’t lost.

As May heads to the sofa and switches the TV on, Peter catches sight of the Magic 8-Ball from the corner of his eye. He walks over and gives it a shake.

Outlook good.

----

tagging: @bylerboyfriends @ravens-starker-stuff, @starker-rays, @ironspiderstarker, @notfor-temporaryuse, @tabbycat1220, @sugarfreecult, @rebel13lion39, @muse-of-gods

#starker #ironspider #high school au #enemies to lovers

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

Text

Survey #326

“life by life / waste to waste / i'm the harbinger: the master of decay”

When you get married what do you think you’ll put most of your focus and money into? Do you mean like, for the wedding? Probably the venue. Or possibly the photographer. Have you ever had a teacher that also taught your parents? No. What’s something you complain about frequently? My legs. Are you afraid of falling in love? Very. Are you close to any of your aunts/uncles? Not very. Do you hate it when people smoke around you? Very much so. Do you own anything that is special edition? Yeah, things like DVDs. Do you have any funky bookmarks? I have this one meerkat bookmark where the image moves when you tilt it. Did you ever watch Pokemon? Hell yeah I did. Are there more females or males in your family? Females. Does anyone in your family snore loudly? My mom does due to having gerd. Dad did too when I actually lived with him. I wouldn't know nowadays. Do you own a camera tripod? Yes. Did you ever believe in mermaids? No. Have you ever purchased alcohol? Yes. Any essential quirks/interests/other you look for in a boyfriend/girlfriend/partner? Similar interests, like being a metal fan and gamer especially, as well as a serious animal lover for sure. Any romantic gestures you really like? Okay if someone did that little bow thing while reaching out for my hand to dance, I'd melt, lol. I also appreciate love interests holding open doors, SHOWING INTEREST IN HOW I FCKN FEEL, asking permission before doing anything in sexual exploration, stuff like that. Any sexual fantasies? Are you daring enough to share one? Yep, not sharing those lmfao. Have you ever been in love? Twice. What is your favorite/least favorite word? My favorite is "serendipity/serendipitous," and my least favorite is "retarded." Have you ever been skinny dipping? No. If I actually had a body I was confident in, I probably would in privacy tho at night lmao. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? Oh yeah. What is your favorite thing to do? Probably RPing with my favorite OCs when I'm in a really creative mood and during a great scene. Did you go to your senior prom? Yeah, I did. Prom's honestly pretty damn overrated, but I did it and his senior prom anyway. It's the picking out a beautiful dress and taking pictures that I loved. What did you do after graduation? I don't remember. We probably went out to eat or something. Favorite home cooked meal growing up? Spaghetti. What item most embarrasses you to purchase? Nothing, really. Do you give cards to people for holidays or events? No. Name the coolest thing about one of your grandparents. Uhhhhh idk. Name two things you put whipped cream on? I hate the texture of whipped cream. Do you ever eat peanut butter straight from the jar? Sometimes if I want a snack but am trying to be healthy-ish, I'll eat just a scoop. What was the last pill you took for? Pain. Do you prefer your clothes loose or close fitting? Loose, 100%. Favorite thing you’ve ever painted? Meerkats grooming. I did it in high school on a large piece of burlap. Are there any songs that remind you of your mother? "Take It Like a Woman" by Alice Cooper, for one. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? Very smart, sweet, friendly, and nice. Game you were best at in PE/gym? Pf, none. Obsession from childhood? Dinosaurs and Pokemon. Best way for someone to bond with you? Let's talk about deep stuff regarding the world or about how awesome animals are. Top 5 favorite Vines? Oh boy. There are just way too many. I'll try to name a few: 1.) the "I can't find my berries" saga guy; 2.) *in drive-thru, asked what he would like to order* "I wanna FUCKIN DIE"; 2.) "i cOUldA DROPpeD my CroISSAnt"; 3.) "it's Wednesday, m'dudes"; 4.) "a d a m"; 5.) "I WON'T HESITATE, BITCH." God, I miss Vine. What is the first meme you remember seeing? Holy cow, I have no idea. Sci-fi, fantasy, or superheroes? Fantasy. Favorite tradition? Dressing up for Halloween, even though I don't do it anymore... Talent you’re proud of having? Writing. Favorite website from your childhood? Webkinz was unbeatable. I was obsessed. Any good luck charms? I don't believe in those. Favorite potato food? French fries. Tell me the color of your eyes, without using the name of a color: Uhhhh a cloudy sky right before rain? Ever been through a goth phase? Goth is my fucking AESTHETIC. I wish I could afford a truly gothic wardrobe, because you bet your sweet ass it's all I'd wear out. Can you remember your first phone? If so, what kind was it? I think so? It was a Blueberry, I believe. Who is your favourite character from Alice in Wonderland? Obviously the Cheshire cat. What is your favorite type of YouTube video to watch? Lately, it's been tarantula and snake channels/pet YouTubers. I still think my overall favorites are let's plays, but right now it's just stepping back a bit. What’s the next project you are excited to start? I have this pretty cool drawing I wanna do of a morbid meerkat doing a big toothy smile, doing a peace sign (but his fingers are syringes) with a crown blinking over his head. Inspired by the "Professional Griefers" lyric of "lab rat king." I just really wanna make it perfect and am procrastinating in fear of failing... Have you ever experienced a miracle? I don't think I believe in miracles. What are your top three names you like for a daughter? Alessandra, Justine, and Chloe, to name a few. Which did you like better: high school or college? High school, at least in most ways. What is the theme of your bedroom? It doesn't have a theme. My interests just kinda threw up everywhere, haha. Have you ever lived in a dorm? No. Were you raised religious? Yes. Do you do your own taxes, or do you hire a professional? I don't have to do taxes yet. What was the very first thing you ever saved up to buy with your own money? Venus was the first big thing, I think. Describe your favorite Christmas ornament: I don't know what that would be, honestly. We have so very many. What jobs did your parents have when you were growing up? Dad's always been a mailman, and he also had a second job as a carpenter for a while. Mom worked with special needs children at my elementary school as a teacher assistant. She also worked at the hospital at one point, doing some computer work. I don't remember her actual position. Are you taller than your mom? We're the same height. Would you marry someone if they were unable to have sex? Sure, that's not a big deal to me. Last reason you went to the ER? For myself, a suicide attempt/overdose. What was the last word document you typed? This survey, actually, so I could save progress as I combine them. What’s something you don’t think people take seriously enough? Global warming. Have you ever dated someone who had a child from a previous relationship? No. Is there any drama currently going on with your family? No. What was the last fruit or vegetable you chopped/sliced up? An apple. I wanted apple slices with peanut butter. What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack? Holy SHIT that is impossible. Maybe the devil cakes, but I really don't know. I love most of them. Do you/your family buy loaf from the bakery or bagged on the shelf? Bagged. White, wheat or other? Mom buys white bread, but my favorite is pumpernickel. What was the last non-fiction book you’ve read? (Not a school textbook!): I ain't got a clue. I don't really read non-fiction. What color are your headphones/earbuds? These are blue. Would you be embarrassed to find out you snored loudly in public? Yep. Thankfully, I don't snore. Do you feel guilty about killing bugs? Yep. How do you feel about coconut? Not a fan. ^ Ever cracked one open? Ha, I've always wanted to. Who did you last worry about and why? My mom. She's getting a CT scan ASAP due to chronic headaches and stomach pain, so I'm worried her cancer might be re-emerging. When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? I don't know; I struggle to do this. If I don't like something, my face shows it. I can't help it. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? Never. Do you have any framed black & white photos in your home? Who are they of? No. What’s the most expensive thing your car needed to get done? N/A If you had a thousand dollars to spend on a pricey brand you like but can’t really afford (until now of course), which ONE brand would you chose? I don't know. Real talk, I find most luxury brands to sell pretty ugly stuff... Do you like candy canes? Yeah. Do you still talk to any of your old teachers? Yes; one is my landlord. What color was the dress you wore to your senior prom? It was black. Ever go to another school’s prom? No. Do you like burning candles or incense? I love incense. Do you ever venture into the woods? What do you normally do in there? When I used to live in the woods, I did every now and then to take pictures. Does your significant other ever make you mix CDs? Single, but that would be so romantic. /swoons How did you dress your freshman year of high school? I was this emo/metalhead/goth creature. What is the best present you have ever received? My dog Teddy. <3 What is the best present you have ever given? I put the most effort into a scrapbook thing of well over a hundred reasons I loved my then-boyfriend Jason. Even though we're done, I honestly hope he still has it, just to remember. What is the best surprise you have ever had? Sara's parents paying for a flight up there to be with Sara for her birthday. Have you ever been robbed? No, thankfully. Ever kiss someone on the first date? No. Ever sleep with someone on the first date? Definitely a nope. Ever give someone a wrong phone number on purpose? No. What’s the strangest thing you have ever witnessed firsthand? I have no idea. It's... very morbid, but possibly dogs twitching after being euthanized. Seeing Teddy do it was such a strange, painful experience. Like there was still life in there... even though I know it was just his nerves doing their final hoorah and he was already dead. Ever seen a psychiatric ward? I've been in a mental hospital five or six times, so I'm uncomfortably familiar with them. What is the last thing you did that you didn’t want to do? Group therapy. I'm really burning out on it. Thankfully, I don't have it on the weekends. What is the last thing you convinced someone else to do? I dunno. If you could live in a different time, would you? When? Nah. Do you prefer to sleep alone or with someone else? Sleeping alone is more comfortably physically, but I usually prefer sleeping with a partner because there's this amazing feeling of safety, love, and companionship. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. Do you prefer cold air and blankets, or warm air and no blankets? Cold air and blankets by ten miles. I can't sleep if I'm even remotely hot. How often do you dust? Sigh, not as much as I need to. What is the most "extreme" activity you have ever done? I haven't done very much that fits that description... so idk. Dr. Pepper or root beer? Dr. Pepper. I hate root beer. Last room you cleaned? Mine. Last thing you did that made you feel like an adult? Checked into the doctor's office by myself, haha... Talk about sad. What’s your favorite picture of your mom? Dad? It's not my business to actually share those pictures, but I can describe them. I fucking ADORE this candid photograph I took of my mom laughing; I will forever cherish it. It's morbid to think about, but it's absolutely a picture I'll frame of her once she's passed away. I don't have many pictures of Dad, but I do really like this picture we took together at Red Lobster once. Are you subscribed to anything (Magazines, monthly boxes, streaming sites, etc.)? Mom pays an Adobe Creative Cloud photography bundle subscription for me, but that's it. Last TV show series you finished? Fullmetal Alchemist with Sara. It was a rewatch for me, but she'd never seen it. What’s something exciting that’s happened to one of your friends recently? A childhood friend got engaged a few days back. Do you have any board games? If so, where do you keep them? We have a few somewhere. What were the last things you glued together? I don’t recall. What are your friends’ pets’ names? I'll just use Sara here since she's my best friend. She has two family dogs, Buster and Beesly, a cat named Winter, four ball pythons named Martha, Crowley, Little Dot, and Jane Marie, and Doris, a bearded dragon that I personally adore most. :') What all did you do today? I played World of Warcraft early this morning, but not for very long. I've been in a phase of being very uninterested in it lately. I've mostly just done surveys... lots of surveys. I'm just in the mood to. I've also been listening to music and watching John Wolfe play Amnesia: Rebirth periodically. If you live in a house, how many floors does it have? If you live in an apartment building, how many units does it have? It's just one floor. Would you like to live in a world with mythical creatures, even if they turned out to be evil or dangerous? Honestly... I probably would, haha. Are you scared of heights? Yes. When was the last time you lost something of great sentimental value? Did you ever end up finding it again? Never, I think and hope. What food do you find to be the most filling? Is this something you eat a lot of? Eggs or oatmeal. Not really. What do you think of people who purposefully train their dogs to fight or to be aggressive? They're fucking garbage human beings. If you suffer/have suffered with acne, do you squeeze your spots or do your best to just leave them be? Ugh, I was so bad (and still am if something pops up) about picking at it. Does your father have any hobbies? What are they? Sure. He loves sports, fishing, idk if he still plays video games, fantasy football... and I can't forget playing with his grandkids. It's hard for me to know all of them when I don't live with him and see him rarely. What did the last face mask you wore look like? It was just a white cotton one. Is there a specific song that you always request at parties? What is it? I don't go to parties. Would you rather read poetry or write poetry? Write it. Have you ever had any really infected injuries? I've had infected piercings as well as a badly infected pilonidal cyst. Is there any band out there that you like every song by them? No. Are you popular on any websites? No. What was the last song you listened to? Aaaaand now I'm hooked on "NIHIL" by 3TEETH. Are you currently texting anyone right now? No. When was the last time you played jump rope? Yikes, probably not since I was a kid. I used to love it. Who was the last person you offended? I dunno. What’s the earliest you’ve ever had to wake up for work? Not early. Do you know anyone who has changed their first name? I know trans people who have, yes. Do you know anyone who has been on life support and survived? No. At least, I don't believe so. Do your parents have a strong relationship together? They're divorced, and Mom at least can't stand him. Dad doesn't really care. Do you ever feel like you’re sharing too much about yourself online? Oh, I absolutely used to. I still might, idk. I've tried to reel it back some. How many windows are in the room you’re in? Eight, but they're just small, vertical rectangles stacked together, so it's not as revealing as it sounds. What was the last necklace you wore? My spiked choker, I think, for pictures. Or maybe the one I have with a bunch of big silver skulls. Do you think there are more dimensions than what we’re able to perceive? I don't think so, no. Does anyone in your family have schizophrenia? My half-sister on Dad's side that I've never met. Have you ever been in an abandoned house? A shack, yeah. Do you like art? I positively adore it. I could NOT imagine life without it. How about theatre? I don't care for it. Have you ever made breakfast for someone? Yes, for Sara. Do you talk to your crush? If you have one. Yeah, she's my best fren. If yes, what do you usually talk about? Nowadays I ask her almost daily how she's doing in regards to her progress of recovering from both serious physical and mental stressors. I try to always be an available ear if she ever wants to vent. Would you rather read or watch a video about something? Watch a video. In what ways have you fulfilled some of the hopes and dreams you had as a teenager? I've fulfilled none of those. What’s one stressful thing you’ve been trying to deal with lately? How have you been dealing with it? Inexplicable, chronic boredom/serious anhedonia. I've just... put up with it. I get pleasure out of essentially nothing most days, and it sucks big time. I just try to distract myself and force myself to do things I usually love, though I've been bad about actually succeeding in making me do said stuff... Is there a regional chain of store/restaurant/etc. in your area that you feel very loyal to? MOTHERFUCKIN BOJANGLE'S, BITCH. You think YOU have good fries somewhere? Oh hunny, sit down. Oftentimes, people warn us against getting tattoos or body modifications or dying our hair unnatural colors because we could be judged poorly for them. But has a more “alternative” look ever worked out in your favor? Well, I like myself better with my piercings and tattoos, and that's all that really matters to me. Do you have any daily routine/habit of that you’re really proud of keeping up? No. .-. Pick one of the following activities to do in a forest (assume you would be equally good at each one of these): Foraging for mushrooms, identifying trees, searching for specific types of bugs, trying to build something out of fallen branches and logs. Searching for bugs w/ my camera!!! But that all sounds fun. What’s the hardest class you’ve ever taken? My most recent math course that I failed horribly.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''master of decay'' by 3teeth

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miximax-hell · 4 years

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...This should have been published the 10th of January. I queued it ages ago (back when my last post was published), but Tumblr farted and decided not to post it. Which is just fantastic. It’s not the first time it decides to screw up the queue, but it’s the first time it happens to me on this blog. So annoying. This means it’s coming a few days late, but I hope you all still had a fantastic EnYaga Day!

As I prepared for True EnYaga Day back in October, I found again this old doodle of mine--the base for what would later become the final design of EnYaga. I thought it might be fun to share it and use it as an excuse to talk about this subject AGAIN, and... that was good enough for me, really.

You guys know me and there’s probably very little reason to do so, but I have never really talked about the reasons behind this miximax, have I? Well, if there is a day to indulge in that, it’s EnYaga Day, so let’s get to it!

As usual, more under the cut.

Despite Tumblr’s betrayal, this does have a perk: I get to revise this post before it’s published, which is great, because I’m happy to report that things are better now than when I first wrote it. In the original version, I mentioned that my life at the time was a little... paused, so there wasn’t really a lot to say. Among the only news worth sharing, I sent an oil painting to a friend a couple of months ago and it arrived very fast and completely safe, so that was great! It was a Professor Layton-themed painting, but now that I don’t have it at home anymore, I’m tempted to make another one... (If I do, chances are more FudoLay content will arrive here swiftly after lol) Other than that, I’d just started my classes again, but I was still desperately looking for a job. At least, classes made me feel like I wasn’t completely wasting every single day, so I was more cheerful than I was during summer. (Funny, because my group of friends at uni used to say that they could only smile during summer, but I was pretty miserable during those months. ww;)

Thankfully, though, I can say I now have a job! And it’s great!! ...The conditions aren’t so great, but at least I’m back to work as a game designer. I’m learning so much and I feel very motivated to work, even if it’s technically a collaboration and I will only get money once the game is published--in other words, when the game starts bringing money our way. This is far from ideal, but I honestly had no other options and I’m having a blast working on this, so I hope something cool will come out of it! For now, I would ask you to keep your eyes on Eskema Games and maybe check out the company’s latest game, Delta Squad? I had absolutely NOTHING to do with that game because it was released way before I joined, but supporting it supports the company I work for, which always comes in handy! It also underperformed, so it could use all the love you guys can give it.

Also, let me quickly point something out: about a year ago, an anon asked me if i was going to include Danganronpa characters in this project. The question is here, in case anyone needs a reminder: https://miximax-hell.tumblr.com/post/181991994534/hey-there-since-youre-doing-miximaxs-with-game Well, I FINALLY got my hands on the DR Trilogy for PS4, so I’ll be looking into that and seeing what I can find! If that anon is still around, I hope I can make them happy.

But let’s cut to the chase already!

As I always make sure to clarify, yes, I do massively ship Endou and Yagami. But there’s thankfully much more to EnYaga (the miximax--if I need to talk about the ship again, I’ll just call it Endou x Yagami) than just “yeah, I ship them.” In order to understand the reasons behind this combination, though, we must venture into two very different subjects: what reasons there are to choose Yagami to begin with, and the life story of yours truly. I swear both are important to get the full picture, but I’ll keep the latter as brief and free of unnecessary information as possible, even if it’s definitely the longest and most complex part. So, without any further ado, let’s see what makes this miximax valid within the logic of this project.

A big chunk of what makes EnYaga work was explained exactly three years ago, here: https://miximax-hell.tumblr.com/post/131215636268/when-the-king-enters-the-room-the-world-stops-and

The tl;dr would be that Endou plays as a goalkeeper, but also as a libero! Being such radically different positions, it’s to be expected that he would need two different miximaxes, because it would be rather difficult to find an aura that improves his field skills (shooting power, speed, etc.) and his goalkeeping abilities at the same time. Thankfully, Yagami gives him the exact abilities a good libero needs to be able to excel--especially when that libero has the pressure of being part of most of the strong hissatsus the team can pull off. So, for more info on EnYaga’s powers, please check the link above. (And note that, of course, this miximax only marginally improves Endou’s goalkeeping capabilities.)

I have also talked in length about the relationship between Endou and Yagami, but here’s a very brief summary. During the in-game events of IE2, Endou gave Yagami hope when all she wanted was to die to atone for her sins, thus saving her life in the process. In return, she wanted to give him the strength to fight when he needed it most as a way to repay his kindness towards her.

Yagami’s innate abilities and the bond they share are the more logical reasons behind this miximax. There is, however, one extra reason to include this miximax in the project.

There have always been three main rules here when it comes to choosing auras:

1. Only characters that come from universes predominantly inhabited by humans (or very human-like creatures, like Zelda’s Hylians).

2. Only one character from every franchise, unless they are Level-5 franchises. In that case, I may use up to two per franchise. Examples of this are Danball Senki/Little Battlers eXperience (with Toramaru and Megane) and Professor Layton (with Fudou and Shishido).

3. One aura coming from every single (and proper) Inazuma Eleven game on the market. Those being Inazuma Eleven, IE2: Fire, IE2: Blizzard, IE3: Spark, IE3: Bomber, IE3: Ogre, IEGO: Light, IEGO: Dark, IEGO Chrono Stone: Raimei, IEGO Chrono Stone: Neppu, IEGO Galaxy: Supernova, IEGo Galaxy: Big Bang, Inazuma Eleven Strikers, IE Strikers 2012 XTreme, and IEGO Strikers 2013. I’m not counting Everyday, SD nor unreleased titles. So far, I have 7 out of 15.

From the beginning, I have wanted Endou to have nothing but Inazuma Eleven-only miximaxes. I mean, he’s the main character and all!

Needless to say, Yagami is part of the Inazuma Eleven miximaxes--in fact, she takes the IE2 Blizzard spot, if anyone is curious about that very specific detail. She is obviously a very predominant character in that game, having a relevant impact during the final match against The Genesis and even (spoiler alert for a 10 years old game) by injuring Kazemaru earlier, because he didn’t just leave like he did in the anime--Yagami sent him to the hospital when he started matching The Genesis’s power. Since she’s a main character in that game, and considering that many of the other important characters introduced in it become part of the teams that make up this project (such as Hiroto, Midorikawa and maaaybe Saginuma), Yagami was the perfect candidate. She was also arguably the strongest among the remaining main characters of IE2, and the only midfielder. Not to mention the bond she shares with Endou, which only rounds it all up even more.

So, as a brief summary, Yagami is an Inazuma Eleven character (which is exactly what I wanted for Endou) and a very strong player, she provides Endou with everything he would need to be a good libero (incredible speed, great shooting strength, being a midfielder and the stamina that inherently comes with it, powerful hissatsus, and so on), she shares a canonical bond with Endou, the contrast between their personalities is super interesting to explore, and there are reasons why even she would want him to take her power. He can hardly have it better! It makes a lot of sense, and it’s all heavily based on canon, so I don’t need to explain much in that regard. That’s always convenient.

But there is another side to all of this. My side.

I first started working on miximaxes with the idea of only making 4 or 5. I simply meant to give extra love to some of my favourite characters to make myself and a few friends happy. This never became a full-fledged project until my good friend Heather, who used to be on Tumblr under the username @ishidoshuuji, said she wanted to be able to reblog the Seitei x Yuuichi miximax I had drawn for her. In other words, this: https://miximax-hell.tumblr.com/post/129863262149/well-it-was-about-time-i-started-using-this-blog

Before that, miximax-hell used to be a private blog: one of those you can only check out if you have the password. I never thought ANY stranger would be interested in it, so why expose myself like that? It would only make me feel bad. I could have never imagined over a hundred people would follow me here, and even less so considering that only about 10 of my friends follow this blog. So I have to thank Heather because, even if 100 isn’t a big number at all here on Tumblr, I still appreciate each and every person who stops by and it’s helped me meet some incredibly lovely people.

Back to the subject, though. This story is directly linked to MamoDai’s. The important part of it was that EnYaga’s design isn’t mine, and so isn’t MamoDai: the former is completely not mine (even if, as the sketch above suggests, the concept was first doodled by me), while the latter was only partially mine. The thing, though, is that the same person made EnYaga and “collaborated” on the creation of MamoDai, which meant I let them into this very personal solo project twice. If you want to check out the full story, though, you can read it here: https://miximax-hell.tumblr.com/post/142160652319/you-should-have-seen-this-one-coming-come-on

As I was saying, miximax-hell is a solo project. It’s something for me to enjoy, for me to think about, for me to develop, for me to improve at designing character, and for me to decide on. I set the rules and I come up with suitable matches--or what I think are suitable matches, that is. ww I’m definitely open to suggestions if anyone is willing to share their thoughts with me, and fanart is always, always, ALWAYS welcome, of course, but I don’t borrow other people’s ideas nor designs. Not because those designs and ideas aren’t fantastic, nor because I’m not allowed to, but because the point of this blog is to have fun and improve my skills. If I don’t do it myself, it’s kind of pointless, so I prefer a bad design made by me over a great design by someone else. Also, if people were to check all of these things out, I wanted it to be because of my work, not because someone super well-known was part of it and people were desperate to get more content from them.

When I first came up with this project, though, someone very close to me wanted to be part of it. Not because they found it interesting per se, but simply because it was mine. I had previously declined an offer to join one of their projects because I lacked the necessary skill, so they wanted to join mine instead. And don’t get me wrong--I appreciate the interest even now! But, again, it beat the point and I had to refuse. Looking back, I’m very glad I didn’t give in, but I felt awful back then and this person must have felt really bad too.

That’s why I made that exception and suggested, “Hey, why don’t we create a miximax together?” That’s how MamoDai was born. But while the interest in working on MamoDai seemed... scarce, this person came up with and gave me something out of their own accord: the EnYaga miximax design I still use to this day.

Now, here’s the thing: EnYaga was a proper gift that person made for me, and I always honour gifts. If it had been a random doodle, like I have received others in the past, it would have ended there. But when someone puts true effort and time into making something especifically FOR ME, regardless of what happens between us later, I still treasure it forever. And this gift came from a person who, apparently, really wanted to be part of this project when I first came up with it, which, honestly, put me in a tight spot. The least I could do was accept this design, which I loved almost as much as I loved them, and incorporate it to my lineup.

EnYaga was going to happen regardless, because I was working on it myself, but this person beat me to it (with such incredible quality, too, which I would never be able to hold a candle to) and, after what I made them go through with my continuous rejections, I had to honour them somehow. It was my way of saying, “I can’t let you do this for me, but I deeply appreciate the thought.”

This person is now out of my life, though. This means that, honestly, I could just get rid of the design. They would never know, and I would be happier with something of my own even if it sucked in comparison. They would never feel offended either--not like they would even if they knew, because it’s obvious they don’t care about me anymore. It would be easy and 100% painless for all parties involved.

But EnYaga is a token of the bond we once shared and I treasure that, even though I don’t want anything to do with that person anymore. It portrays the fun and happy times, not the sad and bitter ending. Happiness is always something worth remembering, isn’t it? And maybe, just maybe, thanks to the wonderful people I’m close to and my eternal love towards Endou x Yagami, I might one day be able to completely forgive the bad and focus on the good, so I can smile when I look at EnYaga and think of this person. I look forward to a day when there isn’t an ounce of bitterness left in my heart (although I am one revengeful and spiteful piece of poo, so it might never happen). And for that possibility alone, it might be worth it to keep making this one exception and let this miximax be someone else’s. Especially now that I have DoYaga to call my own.

So that’s it, folks: not only do Endou and Yagami make for a sick combination in theory, but it’s also a miximax with deep sentimental value for me in so many different ways. So even if it had been someone else’s idea and the two characters were a terrible match in all senses, chances are I would have still kept it. Thank goodness it wasn’t the case. ww

And all because I didn’t finish the design fast enough on my own. May that be the lesson to learn from this: hurry the heck up, self.

#Inazuma Eleven #Endou Mamoru #miximax #mixi max #Original Raimon #Aliea Raimon #Inazuma Japan #reasons behind the miximax #sketch #info #inazuma eleven ares #inazuma eleven ares no tenbin #inazuma eleven orion #inazuma eleven orion no kokuin

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quirkydeaky · 5 years

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Life is Real {Chapter One}

ROGER TAYLOR

how will Roger cope when he finds that his new best friend, whom he's falling in love with, is slowly dying?

HI! So I’m back and hoping this series will not flop, lol. A few people have been interested in seeing this, so here I am with what people want! If you want, drop a comment or send me an ask and I’ll add you to my tag list. Mwah!

Also... This story is a multi-part fan-fiction with heavy, mature themes. The Original (and Main) Female Character has a type of Cancer. The type will not be mentioned, but there may be some scenes with heavy implements of medication, treatment or heavily implied scenes at a hospital.

I DO understand that this topic hits close to home for a lot of people, and if this angst-based series is not something for you, please ignore. Thank you.

[also, send me asks because I need mutuals and also need entertainment!]

W/C: 2k+

Warnings: Angst. Mentions of personal struggle.

Main Characters: 80s!Roger Taylor, MammaMia2!Lily James (Lillian)

[the start will be a bit slow, but please hang in there! this will begin to swing into place in chapter two, fully being immersed in the plot once we hit chapter three! amazing! love you guys. show love, and enjoy.]

Don't you know... I'm still standing; better than I ever did." Lillian quietly sang, her mind foggy, hazy... cloudy with confusion at the thoughts cramming her brain. "Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid." Why were these thoughts circling in her mind? She was fine, that's what everyone thought. It's what it looked like... looking like she had the normal life, maybe some even classified her as privileged after coming out of Oxford University with a post-graduate degree in English and Creative Writing. One with creatives wonders and endless ideas, she was. Her apartment was a bare representation of her mind that was constantly running at the speed of light, a new idea popping up maybe every five minutes, but, the only real action taken in her apartment was the jingle of her keys as she placed them down on the bench of her kitchen, her shoes she chose to wear that day - their clunk hitting the wall as she slipped them off and walked the rest of her way towards her room where she would immediately strip herself of the day's clothes and swap for an oversized hooded jumper. The twenty-seven-year-old always had the audacity to write about her dream life, always adding to the one project she would constantly come back to, like she always has. It had been her side piece throughout university, her majors and lectures always taking priority, a negative fact of her life, as she always wanted to work on this specific piece. The one about her life, not her life in this reality, but the next. Almost a replication of her life if it could be done over again. Her life would be a buzz in this reality. She'd have a better childhood, not one where her father left at the age of eight after providing a solid year and a half of social and financial abuse, leaving herself and her mother with nothing. They grew from that, though. Her mother found better, and even though Lillian hated the guy at first, they grew to become mutual towards each other. Nothing more. She'd have a sibling or two in this life. She'd always wanted one, always wondered why all of her friends had one and she didn't, an only child. But with life moving quickly and a fast independence building for herself, those friends soon faded from her life when she finally found her dream career she was going to work hard to get anywhere near the end goal. A form of desperation, giving her one of the few things she wanted in this life, which would be the only reward she'd receive in this life, too. But the next, she'd be twenty seven, hopefully engaged. Maybe even be a little risky, perhaps, and have her own child be a part of her bridal party. Her son, a page boy? Her daughter, a flower girl? But this life, her real life, held something different. She was twenty seven, at home in her bare, white coloured walls of an apartment writing this supposed dream she wanted to live; this supposed... fantasy, she wanted to fill. But instead of filling this void with her next dream and fantasy, she was filling it by achieving her goal of becoming educated enough to write a book. So that's what she did. Working one, singular shift a week at the local grocer, this is what she lived off. The basics. That's all she needed. She'd had her own form of independence for a while, ever since she finished school, her mother now an obnoxious brat who had her new man, completely forgetting about her daughter that was still under her care at age seventeen, as that's when she completed that form of education before shipping herself straight off to university. Don't get her wrong, she was glad she got this early offer for Oxford, her grades and teacher's recommendations actually getting her somewhere. Yes, don't take her as an ungrateful woman, glad that she was given somewhere to go after being shipped off to Oxford, her mother providing substantial money to find and buy an apartment. Yes, that's right, buy. Her mother even covered costs of attending university, and she was eternally grateful, but also disappointed she couldn't fulfil her duties of being independent as she wanted to, but she wasn't selfish, either. Ten years later and she could count on one hand how many times she's had a call from her, yet, after promising on those calls that both herself (her mother) and her 'father', would come visit. She couldn't even begin to count on one hand how many times they've come to see her. Zero. And, besides the point, she never had the heart to tell her mum that she was going through some tough things in life, fearing she would be met with words similar to 'stop being silly, you're just uneducated', or even better, 'you just don't know how to go about life', - all before she got to the actual reason she called. But that wasn't it at all, because she was perfectly fine in the aspect of having resources. She had an excellent education, a roof over her head and skills to get her somewhere in life, whether she had much of it left, that is. That's why she didn't have the heart, nor the confidence to tell her mother that she was dying, over the phone. She also feared that her mother wouldn't care. Wouldn't believe her. So here she was, strolling the streets in, the dizziness the succumbs her in the morning, the feeling of nausea that doesn't drift until around lunchtime a lot of the time. She tries to prevent wearing black in pure daylight, it attracts sun and heat, which could make her pale and fragile skin burn, making it turn red and peel at a much faster rate than what the rest of the human race would know. Refraining from wearing black also means the people who walk behind her oddly skinny figure don't have to see the constant fall of her blonde hairs that shed from her head, sticking to the material of her clothes. She doesn't want to freak anyone out. But today, Lillian wore black. She typically wears a long sleeve on the top half and long pants on the bottom half, prevents from scaring people, and more importantly herself away, from her constantly bruising skin, the weakness of her own skin bruising at the slightest touch with a little extra force, for example, hitting her elbow on the kitchen bench. Bruise, almost a few hours later, black and blue skin in a circular shape. With a negative mindset almost half the time, her mental health isn't always they greatest, as she sees how her body is affected from treatment, how strong it's getting as her body somehow, after some rounds, grows weaker. Independence was important to Lillian, as mentioned before. She had one, a real friend who stuck close by for a while, but dropped out of the degree they were in together half way through to move to Scotland. Sophie was her name, but after tears and shouted goodbyes at the airport, a promised call every week soon turned into calls once a month, and then once every birthday, maybe on Christmas day if she were lucky. Lillian doesn't even know if Sophie remembers her. So she didn't tell her. No one knows. It's hard that no one knows about that battles Lillian has with herself every day, fighting through the pain, the surprises and the side effects. She doesn't have an outlet, anyone to go to. Her confidence is drained to the point of no return, so she wouldn't even consider going to visit someone like a counsellor. It's been three years and seven months as of the beginning of July 1980. Today. January 1977, not the nicest way to start off the year when you're diagnosed with cancer and given, at that point in time, a message, one saying to 'live the next five years of your life to the fullest', because the doctor's didn't even know if Lillian would be here for her thirtieth birthday. This really isn't how she imagined her life to go. She knew since she was fifteen that she wanted to be an author. Yes, she was eternally grateful that she had an excellent education, the beginning of her life set up for her. But she also wanted to become an author, whether that meant she published a book and it made two people's bookshelves at home or if it meant she became the most known author in the world for the next ten years. She didn't know, she didn't care, she just wanted to get a book published. Lillian is twenty-seven years old. Her birthday is in April. In all honesty, she has a maximum of two years to get this book out, and if she does, she will die a happy woman, as long as she gets one of her works published. She didn't care if she didn't have a boyfriend, a husband for that matter. Yes, she may have been a little upset at the fact that the chance of her having children was becoming closer to impossible than highly unlikely, but what could she do? She was a woman walking around, her 'cancer tag' of sorts, invisible to the rest of the world, to the naked eye of the people that walk past her on a day-to-day basis. She'll sometimes get bruises on her shoulders when people unnecessarily barge into her. But what she felt right now was a sense of loss of direction. Her recent chemotherapy session was a little stronger than the last, and one of the side effects was a lack of remembering things. Forgetting things all of a sudden. Surroundings, thoughts, all those types of things. This thought overwhelmed her, as she tried to escape her routine of staying home in isolation for most of the week and escape to the different parts of England, wanting to explore. If she didn't have long left, she needed to do it. Lillian really didn't know where she was; picking up the pace as she sees street signs not far ahead through her blurry vision, both from tears and as a side effect. Speed walking was a common thing Lillian did, sometimes to escape the world when it all got too much. Running was something she refrained from doing, the speed her legs were to travel at making her muscles stiff after a while. Another side effect. She knew the city she was in. Norfolk. She was still in England, but she doesn't remember what specific part she's in. This is the difficult part, trying to remember. Slowing down as she enters a street with townhouses, mostly single or double storey, nothing extravagant. A quieter part of the town. Friendly looking. Lillian calms down a little, walking slow with an effort to make her heart rate drop back to average resting rate, so she wouldn't visibly stress once more. But her heart rate only sped up as she realises she's reached the end of the street. A no through road, no way to get to any other part of own unless she turns around, but that was the opposite of what she wanted to do. Her breathing increases, the effort to summon her energy to turn around and walk back to where she originally came from disappears, so she turns back and walks forward towards the door in which she was standing not too far away from. Knocking. A thing that makes her nervous. The chance of having to communicate with someone. She wasn't introverted, god no. She was as extroverted as could be... or, more or so used to be. She believed she still was, but, that was for both her and whoever answered the door to find out. Her breathing may be rapid, and her mouth may be dry, desperate for water. She was dehydrated- but her breathing only increases once more, her mouth becoming impossibly dryer than she's met with a confused face of a man, blonde. He's beautiful, and she knows who he is. She seems to forget everything she's supposed to know as she makes eye contact with this man's piercing blue eyes. She knows who he is. It's Roger Taylor. Drummer. Famous. Queen. "Uhm... Hello?" He asks, clicking his finger in front of the startstruck girls face. "Can I help you?"

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purplesurveys · 5 years

Text

354

[Hiiiii. Trigger Warning: Suicide in a few questions]

What do you want to name your first child? Olivia if it’s a girl, Luis if it’s a boy. Either way Gab and I were planning on naming kid/s after her parents.

Would you ever name a child after yourself? No, coming up with nothing other than Robyn seems incredibly lazy.

Is there a guy or girl you wish things had worked out with? No.

What makes you nauseous? Certain car smells and my uncle’s driving.

What are your favorite spicy foods? Anything Indian, Korean, or Thai. I like spicy when it’s a part of the food. But when something is just peppered in artificial spicy powder, the spiciness doesn’t feel as... ~meaningful, if that makes any sense. When it’s spicy only for the sake of being spicy, I don’t like it.

Which do you like better: being an adult or being a kid? I like being an adult because my experience as a kid was terrible and certainly not something I want to go back to.

Were you excited to be a teenager on your thirteenth birthday? Yeah I was. I was even ecstatic that my mom made an entire Facebook album of me for my thirteenth birthday with photos from when I was a baby up until I was 12, since I was so excited to see my own evolution growing up lmao. Naivety and conceitedness at its finest.

Did you feel insecure in high school? Not really, I mostly didn’t give a shit in high school lol.

Do you think there are different types of depression? I don’t just think them, there are different kinds.

Would you ever be friends with someone who was suicidal? I’m the suicidal friend hahaha. I would but I’m gonna have to tread the friendship carefully since I get triggered fairly quickly. Who was the biggest bully in high school? There wasn’t a bully in high school. People got over that by like 4th grade, at least in the school I grew up in. High school’s just more of a race for popularity at that point.

What was your favorite class in high school? History.

Would you rather have a daughter or a son? Daughter.

Are you woman, man, boy, or girl? Girl/woman(???)

Have you ever written to an advice columnist? Nah. I haven’t seen those since like 2005.

What color is your Christmas tree? The tree is green and it has gold and red accents to it.

Do you celebrate Christmas? My family does but I prefer to lock myself up in my room. My seasonal depression hits during Christmas and it’s become something I absolutely dread more and more each year.

Do you celebrate Halloween? I definitely take it way more seriously than Christmas.

Do you believe all Christians are evil and hypocritical, or only some? Most of them are. Thank god I dodged that bullet earlier on.

Do you think it’s bullying to tell someone they’re naive? No, it’s just telling them how it is.

Did you get bullied more as a child, a teenager, or an adult? Child. People teased me mercilessly for my name which to them sounded really boyish. I ended up hating my name for a time, and myself forever.

Have you ever broken out in hives? No...I’m not sure what this means.

Have you ever had a doctor not believe what you told him? Yeah the doctors in my university are fucking losers. I went there to get my physical exam before I was able to enroll, they were super mean, and I haven’t gone back since.

If you’re female, would you feel uncomfortable having a male gynecologist? Uh not sure about the culture of that place but I don’t think I’d feel awkward haha. They’re there for the job.

Do you like Lisa Frank? As a kid.

What gives you nightmares? Getting shots, talking on the phone, depression.

Do you dream in black and white or color? I don’t think I’ve ever dreamed in black and white.

Have you ever been in a car accident? Only really mild ones.

Were you ever hospitalized as a child? Just once. I was a month old and if I remember correctly, I had a severe case of diarrhea/lactose intolerance. I would poop out instantly the milk I would drink, and my stomach got so deflated that if you pressed on it, it wouldn’t go back to its normal shape.

Do you believe that drug addicts and alcoholics should count as people? ????????? Yes ?????????

Will you vote in the next presidential election? HAHAHAHAHA you bet your ass I would. I never picked this garbage murderer of a president my country has now. What’s your favorite zoo animal? I hate zoos.

Are you allergic to your favorite animal? Nope.

What is the best thing to eat with soup? I don’t really...eat anything with soup. Soup is always just a side dish whenever I go out for Jap or Chinese.

Do you eat ice cream with a fork or a spoon? Spoon. I eat slowly and ice cream always melts under my watch, so fork is definitely a no-no.

What’s your favorite country besides the USA? Ugh, I hate the US. Favorite country is Canada or Australia.

Are you an adventurous eater? YESSSSSSSSSSS GIVE ME ALL THE NEW FOOD

Do you take risks? Erm, sometimes. Sometimes I’m too scared as well. There’s no telling.

Who was the last friend who turned on you? In all my group of friends, I’m always the neutral one/the mom/the referee so people are usually scared to turn on me cos I never do anything to provoke them. The first and last one who turned on me was that bitch Marielle from fifth grade but that was nearly ten years ago.

How old were you when you get your first cell phone? I was 6, but it was meant to be given to me in advance for my 7th birthday.

How old were you when you got your first personal laptop? 11.

Did you get senior pictures taken? Yeah dude, like three years ago.

What will you do to save money at your wedding? Bust my ass. I’m already good at saving so I’ll have no problem doing that. I want the perfect wedding so best believvvvvve I’ll do anything to make that happen.

What was the last thing you bought online? I knew I was gonna get super depressed this time around so I went on a shopping spree and bought two huge adult coloring books (city-themed!!!) and a set of coloring books. I’m really happy I took this step forward and chose to take care of myself, because otherwise I’d normally try to kill myself as soon as I find myself in a slump.

Do you shop online? No, I still prefer doing it physically.

What color is your bicycle? I can’t even ride a bike, what makes you think I’d own one?

Do you consider yourself unique? Not really.

What’s your favorite coffee shop in your town? Coffee Project. Really nice atmosphere for working, has 3-hour wifi for each receipt/order (so if you run out of wifi, you can always just go back and get another pastry and get another round for 3 hours), staff is nice and understands college students, and has the best cheese pizza. For 150 pesos!!!!!!!!!!!!

Did you attend a youth group? Never.

#survey #surveys

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isrustandstardust · 3 years

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Are you young at heart, or an old soul?

A very old soul.

What makes someone a best friend?

Complicity.

What Christmas present do you remember the most?

A huge crocodile plush.

Tell me about a movie/song/tv show/play/book that has changed your life.

Slaughterhouse n.5 - Kurt Vonnegut. I have it tattooed on me.

Name one physical feature that you like about yourself, and one you dislike.

I like my hands, skinny and long and my lips, are full and well shaped.

I don’t like my stomach because of my fucking protruding ribs.

Would you like to reconnect with any friends you’ve lost contact with?

I’d love to have a reunion with my uni classmates.

What’s more important in a relationship: physical attraction or emotional connection?

Both.

Name a movie that you knew would be terrible just from reading the title.

I don’t judge a movie by the title but I know for a fact that every Baz Luhrmann’s movie will suck.

What holiday do you most look forward to?

Christmas!

How is the relationship between you and your parents?

I don’t speak with my mother since the summer of 2018. I see my dad every two/three months.

You’ve got the TV on, but you’re not really watching. What channel is the TV on?

Top crime.

Name a song that never fails to make you happy.

Do you realize - The Flaming Lips.

You know at least one person named Michael. Tell me about him.

He was a childish fuck. Tried to hookup with me right in front of his gf.

If you could pick anywhere to live the rest of your life, where would it be?

Iceland.

Can money buy happiness?

It cannot make it worse.

Do you drink? Smoke? Do drugs? Why, or why not?

I almost don’t drink anymore because I don’t feel like it, I smoke because Ilike it, I don’t do drugs because it’s stupid.

Is there anyone close to you that you know you can’t trust? You don’t have to give names.

Sure is.

Where was your favorite place to go when you were a little kid?

My bedroom. XD

Have you ever spent a night in the hospital?

More than I’d like to remember.

Do you enjoy being with only one or two friends, or with a large group of people?

I hate large groups of people. Too tiring.

Do you like the type of music your parents listen to? Do your parents like the type of music you listen to?

No, not at all.

Have you ever been bullied? Have you ever bullied anyone else?

I’ve been bullied, a lot. Never bullied anyone tho.

If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Idk, I’m not that into food. Red meat maybe?

If your partner wanted to wait until marriage before having sex, would you stay in that relationship?

Hell no. Sexual intimacy is important in a relationship.

Do you believe in a god?

Lol no, I’m not stupid.

Of all the social networks in the world, why use Tumblr?

I’m a nostalgic person, what can I say.

What’s your favorite Tumblr tag to track?

Goth aesthetic.

Would you call yourself/your family “middle class?”

No, we were utterly broke XD

Name a TV series you didn’t enjoy until after it ended.

All of them, I watch them after all the hype is gone.

Have you ever bought a product from an infomercial?

Nope.

If you could give up your car and never have to drive again, would you?

No way.

If you go back to one point in time to give advice to yourself, when would you go and what would you say?

Run like hell.

What’s your “quirkiest” habit?

I only have quirk habits.

What is “normal?” Are you normal?

Normal is boring, I’m not normal luckily, never been.

Someone close to you is dying. You have the choice to let this person live for 10 more years, but if you do, you cause the death of 10 strangers. You don’t have to see them die. Do you take the offer?

In a skip second. Sorry guys.

What is one thing you could never forgive?

Lies.

Would you rather be in a relationship after the honeymoon period ends, or be single?

Real relationships start after the honeymoon period.

Is it possible for guys and girls to be just friends?

Of course.

Where do you and your friends go to hang out?

Each others homes, rock clubs.

Write the first paragraph of your obituary.

See you down there bitches.

What is the best TV theme song ever?

Hannibal’s.

When you were young, what would you dream you would be when you grew up?

A pathologist. I was morbid even as a child.

When you’re alone in your own home, do you walk around naked?

No, I have way too many windows.

What gets you out of bed in the morning?

My projects, my husband.

Do you want to have more friends than you have right now?

No, I’m actually ok.

What part of the past year sticks out in your mind?

The ‘one illustration a day’ I did during the lockdown.

You win a scratch-off lottery game that gives you $2000 a week (after taxes) for the rest of your life. Do you keep your job?

Yes, I love to make art. Illustrations, videos, photos and music alike.

Could you be in a long-distance relationship? If you’re in one, what makes yours work?

I’m not into LDR, I like to have my man with me and share the daily things.

What’s the best route to your heart?

My mind and my fantasy, it’s a twisted route.

Have you ever met someone through the internet, then met them in real life?

Yup, and dated them for 4 years.

What is your favorite sport?

Cycling.

What has been troubling you lately?

My body not reacting well the few times that I feed him.

What do you use more often: your intuition or logical reasoning?

Intuition first, logic after. Usually my intuitions are right.

Do you know what makes you happy?

A few, precise things. Art, love, freedom.

Tell me about the last book you read.

I read a criminology book. So fascinating!

What is the nicest compliment you’ve ever been given?

‘Nothing last in your hands’.

Who was your first crush?

A kid from my class back in kindergarten I think.

Do you believe that there is life on other planets?

Yes, I’d love to find Turians somewhere!

Predict what your life will look like a year from now.

Home renovated, my main and secret project on the run, a Rottweiler, a Sphynx and a bike!

Often, people will ask how your last relationship ended. I want to know how it began.

We just looked at each other and BAM. Thunderbolt.

Where is your favorite place to go out and eat?

The sushi place we own.

What is something you want to change about your current situation?

We are waiting for a decent sum of money to arrive.

Early bird or night owl?

Night snake :3

Are there any childhood possessions you still hold on to?

No, not a single one.

Give me an unpopular opinion you have.

Harry Potter is overrated and actually poorly written.

What was the last song that was stuck in your head?

A song from an old Baraofetida’s album a friend made me listen.

Where do you live? Be as general or specific as you want.

Somewhere between Pisa and Lucca, Tuscany.

Do you believe in giving kids medals and trophies for participation?

No, you raise a lot of unique special goddamn snowflakes that way. Yuck.

What was the longest car ride you’ve ever taken?

9 hrs straight.

Have you ever taken part in a protest?

No, not that I recall.

Would you ever use an online dating service?

Nope, lame!

What is your ethnic heritage?

I’m an Italian girl who doesn’t looks Italian at all.

Describe a person that inspires you.

An amazing woman, photographer, videomaker and musician.

Love her work.

If you earn minimum wage doing what you love, would you?

Sure.

Do you believe in luck?

Kinda, I believe in karma more.

Describe the last time you were very angry at someone.

It’s been a while, maybe it was last year when I was really mad at a colleague of mine.

Do you want to live until you’re 100?

Oh god, no.

Do people change? If so, how do you keep a relationship together when both of you start to change?

Will power and hard work.

Have you ever risked a friendship by telling someone you liked them?

I’ve never liked a friend.

Would you rather be alone doing something you enjoy, or doing something you don’t like with your best friends?

I’d rather be alone. In general XD

Do you practice what you preach?

I do my best.

What do you value more in a significant other: Attractiveness or intelligence?

Intelligence, I have no use for a pretty empty box.

Are you hard-headed?

A lot.

Have you ever laughed uncontrollably when it was socially inappropriate?

A couple of times, yeah.

When have you felt most alive?

When I almost died.

Would you prefer to live? A city? The suburbs? The countryside? The mountains?

By the lake.

Do you often skip breakfast?

I always skip breakfast.

How do you know what true love is?

You just know, it strucks you and leaves you almost dead.

Would you want to know the exact date and time you were going to die?

Yes, I don’t like surprises.

Where is “home” for you?

Nowhere, I don’t know what home feels like.

Do you want to be perfect?

I’d love to.

What have you never tried, but would really like to someday? What’s holding you back?

Doing underwater photography and money, of course.

How do you express your creativity?

I draw, I carve wood and bones, I decorate hats, do sculptures, I create and edit videos and do music.

Describe your neighborhood.

A little Tuscan town.

Name something you only liked because it was popular.

Never liked popular things.

Give me the story of your life in six words.

Then she knew she fucked up.

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anti-yandere-dev · 7 years

Text

hey so i 'redid' the yansim characters but not all of them i wrote 2 much so

[I put the submission under the cut since it was pretty lengthy]

hey whats up guys i had 2 put this in a submission as well as literally typed this in a note bc im on data & i dont wanna use a lot of it

basically my au takes place in a college instead. seems more fitting bc theyre actual adults & just feels Right.

theres more characters than there is in the original but thats mainly because i took the ‘genderbent versions’ & made them useful (i pretty much made them in2 siblings 4 some characters lol) anyways!! lets break down the characters

also lads, lassies, non-gender specific term for those bc i dont know the term, im givin yall a warning 4 self harm, suicide, nsfw implications/rape, possible drug abuse, and the rest of the Basic Criteria

Akihiko (Previously known as Senpai): He’s gay & trans. His name means 'bright prince’ which really has no significance, I just thought it was pretty……………and everyone views him as a prince bc he’s rly nice and kind and forgiving and actually has a personality other than being a cardboard box. Eventually gets into a commited relationship w/ 'Yandere-kun’ who I really need to give a name. Akihiko has a twin brother, I took that idea from the possibility of a younger sister, and admittingly(admittedly???) enough, Koumi’s 'genderbent’ Hanako. I’ll get into detail on his twin later, but they have a pretty good relationship. Akihiko (it was at this point i actually looked up a name 4 him & went back 2 edit stuff bc i h8 senpai lol) is still childhood friends w/ 'Osana’, who I renamed Ami(i4got her last name i had 4 her). However, neither of them have romantic feelings for one another, considering Akihiko is only attracted to males, and Ami is only attracted to females(theyre gay.). Akihiko actually meets Ayano when she is about to commit suicide, when he saves her. Ami is there with him, so they both save her. Aside from slight backstory related stuff, Akihiko is actually rather popular. People like him for an actual personality this time!! He’s very kind and puts others needs before his, which is rather dangerous. Ami has lectured him on this many times. Akihiko’s also known for having really good grades and being very helpful when it comes to tutoring others. He meets Ichirou (yandere-kun i literally just looked up anothr name his name means first son bc hes the first son btw lolol) eventually when Ayano invites him over. (sry this is everywhere btw i should have put this in2 a specific order) ngl i feel like this is enough on akihiko like if u wanna kno more abt him hmu on my main christopherpierre-official

Ami (Previously known as Osana): god shes so fucking gay like as soon as she met ayano she fuckign DIED bc she loves her so much???she thinks ayano is like. the prettiest fuckgin girl ever. holy fuckshit shes GAY AND WILL DEFEND AYANO WOTH HER LIFE!!!! Anyways. Ami comes from a dangerously abusive household, and as a result, took a lot of self defense classes when she ran away at age 13. (what year is tht in japan pls help) She still retains some of her 'tsundere’ personality, but she’s more thoughtful of others feelings. She met Ayano as she was about to throw herself into highly active traffic, but she and Akihiko were able to stop her before she could hurt herself. As soon as Ami and Akihiko were able to calm Ayano down, they called an ambulance/contacted the hospital, considering she had a lot of bruises and cuts. They would later find out Ayano’s father was extremely abusive, and the mother was unable to do anything because she was away on a trip for work. A lot of people know Ami for how assertive she can be, misinterpreting her mostly good intentions as aggressive. Ami is mostly known for her knowledge on medical related things, but she still has a slightly bad reputation because of how rude she comes off as. again thts enougb on ami if u wanna kno more just ask me!!

Ayano: still keeps the name bc I Like It?? its pretty fuck u. Ayano has none of her yandere personality. She’s fuckign AFRAID of everything bc of her SHIT ASS ABUSIVE DAD!! Her mom’s still kinda yandere tho, but she didnt kidnal the dad or anything. Their marriage is founded off of Pure And Honest Love…….until the mom kills the dad 4 being a homphobic shit bitch lol. Ayano actually has a lot of self harm scars. She barely gets to see her older brother, Ichirou, who is two years older than her, because he’s away or some shit idk he gets abused p badly too tho. Ayano is rly reserved & quiet & im debating on giving her bpd but its Iffy idk. she has ptsd & kinda sorta got raped by some Fucker in middle school (ichirou took care of the fucker (: hes dead.) so she has a lot of trauma going on here!! I kinda sorta projected some emotional trauma of mine onto Ayano;;; Obviously when Ami found out she was fuxking enraged. Ayano can’t afford to move out of her house just yet, and her brother can’t necessarily take her in, nor does he have her contact info. He kinda sorta left thr country for a bit?? Not sure what country I want this to take place in yet. However, Ichirou is fairly powerless against his father as well, so he took a lot of the beatings, (even tho this boy is fucking Strong as Hell like GOD FUCKIN DAMN!!! he can lift his own mom w/o an issue!! but he kinda left like right away as soon as he could & couldnt take ayano i mean she was still in high school & he Obviously has guilt over not taking her w/ him) but not as many as Ayano, seeing as to how she was the fathers least favourite. Her mother never married the father, and she didn’t want the children to inherit his last name either. …..anyways this is enough i thimk

Ichirou (Previously Yandere-kun): Gay. Loves Akihiko. Retains the yandere personality, but it’s not as bad??? He left the [insert surname household here fuck aishi its not even a Real japanese surname] household as soon as possible, and had immediate regrets. Loves his darling little sister with all of his heart, but it’s literally not incestuous. It’s just good sibling love………also he likes 2 embarass ayano a lot lol. As soon as he met Akihiko, who I never mentioned to have pastel pink hair, he fell in love like, right away? Even though I personally don’t believe in love at first sight (that’s a lie I fell in love w/ most of my anime bf’s @ first sight i can shut the Fuck Off) Ichirou was just??immediately enchanted by this beautiful prince…….he’s just that gay. He’s 2 whole singular years older than Ayano. actually not 2 whole years but w/e hes a scorpio tho. Ichirou has definitely been in relationships w/ other men b4 but they didn’t work out too well. Some rando called him 'daddy’ once and wanted to fucking Die he has shit experiences with his dad & hates the daddy kink so much. He also has ptsd. Doesn’t know how to deal with his emotions at all so he just bottles them up and lets them out all at once and it’s a mess. Also has self harm scars, and some scars from his father trying to Literally Kill Him. This boy……strong as fuck. Can lift his own mom. Has held Ami, Ayano, and Akihiko all at once. Somehow. He’s just a really good older brother? But he’s also really sneaky. While he is jealous of the time Ami & Ayano spend with Akihiko (the A squad lol i just realized their names all start w/ the letter a) he does respect that they’re really close friends, and nothing more. He’s also aware of the unsaid feelings between Ayano and Ami (vry perceptive) so he doesn’t care lol. However, he has little to no tolerance of anyone else being around him. He has a slight distaste for Akihiko’s twin, Kazuhiko (the name means harmonious prince i got a Theme goin on here) but he disregards the feelings. wow talk abt an Info Dump okay next 1

Kazuhiko (Previously the 'genderbent’ little sister/brother, made him into Akihiko’s twin brother): He’s actually a yandere too?? But not 4 Akihiko. He’s vry supportive of Akihiko tho. When he & his twin were in middle school, he gave his uniform to his brother bc he still got the sailor uniform, so he took it. There were some troubles but hey I don’t know how this shit is dealt w/ so please. Just accept this brother supporting his gay trans twin……pls….. He enjoys Ayano’s company. She reminds him of his gf/d8m8, the 'genderbent’ version of “”“"senpai”“”“ (theyre cousins but nobody knows yet so thats why) so he introduces them and they hit it off pretty well! Kazuhiko get Jealous™ and nearly exposes his yandere personality but his Lovely Beautiful Nonbinary Girlfriend reassures him tht they only love him. He loves Yuuka (their full name is yuuka minako) so much?? He would kill 4 them. Literally. He almost has. & b4 i accidentally make a cishet character bc i Refuse 2 4 some???odd reason idk, kazuhiko is a Bisexual Demiboy who fell in love w/ a nonbinary who is okay w/ feminine aligned things. Back on track, Kazuhiko is fairly popular w/ a lot of people for many reasons, and oh wow what a Fucking Cliche ppl r strongly sexually attracted to him!!coolio. he looks nothing like koumis fuckass potato lookin little brother btw. But a lot of people hate the fact that he’s in a Very Committed Relationship w/ Yuuka bc shes not that pretty damn!! But she is. She’s so fucking pretty. To him, at least. He basically fucking worships Yuuka. this is A Lot next character lol

Yuuka (Previously 'Senpai-chan’ or w/e lol): Nonbinary who’s fine w/ she/her pronouns, but also uses they/them. Very shy, Ayano & Ichirou’s cousin. Has a younger sister, and two older siblings who are twins. The younger sister is the old concept for the original little sister, and the older siblings are nemesis-chan & 'nemesis-kun’. While Yuuka and their siblings have lived a fairly abusive life, they haven’t sustained as much 'damage’ as Ayano’s family. Yuuka & Ayano are related by their mothers. They are sisters, only a year and an undetermined amount of months apart. This means after Ryoba, Ayano’s mother, or Sakurako, Yuuka’s mother, moved away, they lost contact with one another, never bothering to talk again. Yuuka and Ayano get along exceptionally well, and Hanako (u remember the little sister well her name stays the same bc its meaning is just flower child. also her design changes.) often refers to Ayano as an elder sister. Yuuka’s relationship with her little sister is somewhat strained due to the three year age gap, but they still get along regardless. Their relationship is strained because Yuuka promises to spend more time with their younger sister, but there’s not much time due to an overwhelming amount of schoolwork, as well as their job taking up a lot of time, too. Regardless, Yuuka doesn’t forget to call their darling little sister as often as she can, checking up on her and how well she’s doing in school. next 1!!!! also i4got 2 talk abt their relationship w/ kazuhiko here bc i was rly focused on mentioning family stuff…..oops (also 4got 2 mention mental health stuff??but like. yuuka has adhd, depression, anxiety, u can just ask me if u wanna know more tbh)

Hanako: i kept the name bc it just literally means flower child & honestly shes such a flowery child??anyways. Hanako retains little to none of her annoying rip-off-nico personality. Instead, she has set up a calm, shy exterior as a defense mechanism due to the many years of neglect she received from her father. (me @ myself y r all the dad characters fuxking Dicks in this like??okay damn.) On top of that, growing up, her mother was never around, due to the fact that she was in the hospital to a terminal illness. Instead, she had to rely on Yuuka for attention, since the twins, Tomoko (sister) and Kiyoshi (brother) left before she graduated her first year in middle school. Hanako also has difficulties with her schoolwork because she, much like her sister, has ADHD. Due to this, she struggles to keep up with the class, and has a hard time paying attention to almost anything that doesn’t interest her enough. However, she has many supports, helping her as much as possible in many ways, which does make her feel better about herself. After her mother had made a full recovery and left the hospital in her current year, she has felt much better about herself, and her grades have definitely improved. Although her father did leave her a while back when she found out he was having an affair on her mom, she still managed fairly well on her own. i mean cmon its not like she liked her dad tht much lol he was a Big Fucking Asswipe hanako isnt as fleshed out as i wished her 2 b but shes not That signigicant to the main story??idk. like shes still in highschool & shes only 17 & this takes place in college so??i dunno. i mean if u got suggestions or smth..sure

Tomoko (Previously Nemesis-chan, made her one of the older siblings bc idk y not lol: There’s not much to say about her. She’s 28, which is only 11 years apart from Hanako. She was entirely capable of filling in the missing mother role for her and Yuuka, but she herself didn’t know what to do. On top of that, she was more focused on getting the best grades out of the entire class, and was much better at academics than her brother. Tomoko has a very cold exterior. She is hard to connect with, and pays little to no attention to anyone elses feelings than her own. This mainly stems from the fact that her father, who she doesn’t even consider a blood related relative, was too busy messing around with other women. buddy i dont know what else 2 write 4 tomoko like she just has severe apathy issues & just doesnt know how 2 connect w/ others. next character

Kiyoshi (Previously Koumi’s shit ass 'genderbend’ Nemesis-chan): Unlike Tomoko, he was able to fill in the father-like role for Yuuka and Hanako. Due to having to take on the role of the father, it put a large strain on his academics and work outside of school. He, at one point, almost had to drop out to take care of his younger siblings, but decided against it. He eventually decided to teach Yuuka how to do her own laundry and how to cook when she was only 9. Due to this, Yuuka was able to take care of herself and Hanako while Kiyoshi could work and pay their bills. Kiyoshi was only 23 when he left the household so he could go to college and get a degree, leaving Yuuka at age 15, and Hanako at age 12. he could b more fleshed out but im??i dunno. im Panicking okay do u think i can work on a character tht doesnt rly show up in the story a lot.

anyways im just putting all of These Guys in 1 this 4 now bc this is A Lot as it is. ill do more later also give me criticism on these pls

I really like what you’ve done with the characters (especially now that they have personalities and stories behind them, instead of just nothing). Also, the names you gave them were cute.

-Mod Sega

#submission #yansim au

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surveyjunkie · 7 years

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1. First of all, what do you prefer to be called? Tasha. 2. What is your favorite form of creative expression? For me, it’s either blogging or painting. If I had any musical talent, it would be that. 3. How do you like your coffee OR if you don’t like it, why?: I take it with loads of flavored cream. 4. What is the least desirable thing, in your opinion, to put on a pizza that you have heard of people actually eating?: I guess anchovies...fish and pizza just don’t sound appetizing together. I’m also not big on putting chicken on pizza unless it’s chicken bacon ranch. 5. Would you rather witness the beginning or the end of the universe?: The beginning.

6. Describe your favourite pair of socks: They have the sailor moon bow on them.

7. What is the current or last song you are listening/listened to, and does it have any special significance to you?: I don’t even remember what it was. I can’t find my headphones :( 8. Do you prefer rainbows or stars?: Stars 9. Describe the best day of your life NOT in terms of events, but in terms of your feelings: Elation. 10. Would you rather go to a planetarium or an aquarium?: Aquarium. 11. Do you know the reason that 11:11 is considered to be auspicious?: No idea. 12. What decorations are hanging on your walls?: At home? There’s a couple of paintings I made, a framed Margarita recipe, and my Bachelor’s degree. 13. What is your favourite planet in our solar system?: Earth 14. How do you express love?: More through actions than words because I suck at talking about emotions. << 15. Do you consider yourself to be more spiritual or scientific?: Spiritual I guess. 16. If you had a lava lamp, what color would you want it to be?: Teal 17. Would you rather be able to revisit your past to simply re-experience a positive moment or revisit your past in order to change things and risk the consequences?: Maybe just re-experience a positive moment. I’m weird about the idea of changing things that have happened in the past, even though I have strong regrets. I feel like things wouldn’t be how they are now if I hadn’t had the unique experiences of the past. Idk. 18. Have you ever had a past-life regression or memory?: I remember when I first got braces, I told my mom that the feeling of having them felt familiar, even though I’d never had them before in my life. That’s the only indication I’ve had so far that I may have led a past life. 19. What is your favourite holiday and why?: Christmas. Family and food. << And eggnog/booze 20. Are you better with remembering dates or names?: Dates. I’m terrible with names. 21. What was your favourite book that you had to read for a class?: 1984. 22. What is your favourite number and why is it significant to you?: 7. It signifies my 7th year of life and the 7th grade, which were both great times for me.

23. Would you rather explore space or the ocean?: Space. 24. What prompted you to call the last person you called?: I missed her call so was calling her back. 25. Star Trek or Star Wars?: Wars. 26. Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter?: LOTR. 27. What is your favourite band and why?: I have lots of favourites, because I can’t choose just one. << 28. What colour best resonates with your best friend(s)?: Navy blue or white. 29. Where do you work and why do you work there?: I work in the research office at the local hospital because they offered me a position that is relevant to my bachelor’s degree and will look extremely good on grad school applications.

30. Have you ever gone to a public karaoke facility, and what did you sing?: I’ve been to one, but I didn’t sing 31. What animal do you feel most connected with?: My dog. 32. Have you ever had “special brownies” or any other kind of “special” treat?: Yep, I didn’t care for them. I just prefer to smoke it. 33. What book are you reading at the moment?: None. 34. What is the funniest thing that you have done at a fast food restaurant? Probably when I fell asleep on my food when I was drunk. 35. Do you enjoy listening to music that is sung in another language?:

Yes, especially Spanish 36. Quote the last movie you watched: “Tale as old as time, song as old as rhyme, Beauty and the Beast” 37. Do you know more than just your sun sign (like your ascending sign or moon sign etc.)?: I’m not sure what that is 38. Do you have any jewelery on you that holds significance, and if so, what is it and why is it significant?: I have a couple of rings my mom bought for me on my birthday. One is a ruby ring which is my birthstone and the other has two small diamonds in it. 39. What is your favorite kind of cheesecake?: Peanut butter fudge 40. Why did you last feel warm and fuzzy inside?: Just cuddling with Josh.

41. What band that no longer performs together do you wish would have a reunion tour?: Pink Floyd.<< Yes. They came to my city back when I was in college and I was hoping my dad would take me, but he never did. I’m still salty as hell about it. 42. What band that IS still together do you wish would perform in your area?: Alt-J 43. Have you ever been in a band, and what role did you play in it?: Nope 44. What has been the single most frightening experience of your life?: I haven’t had anything too terrible. Most of them just involve minor car accidents, my car breaking down in the middle of the highway, or locking myself out of my apartment. They’re stressful scary things but I haven’t had anything that has caused trauma, which I’m thankful for. 45. Who is/was your favourite Spice Girl?: Baby Spice. 46. Do you prefer free verse or poetry set in a form?: It doesn’t matter to me 47. In a hotel, would you choose to go in the hot tub, the sauna, the workout room, or the pool?: The hot tub. 48. Imagine that you are exploring space. Who would you want with you and what would you want to explore, assuming you are not limited in any way?: I would want a bunch of trained astronauts with me. The idea of space freaks me out. << 49. Have you ever astral projected?: Say what? 50. What is your favourite song by the group t.A.T.u?: Probably “All The Things She Said” because that’s the only other one I know besides “They’re Not Gonna Get Us”.

51. Describe what you envision as “paradise”: Being on a boat in the middle of a lake with beer, a fishing pole, and good music. I think I may have been a redneck in another life, but I’m okay with that. 52. What element do you feel most connected to?: Water. 53. What is a cause that you feel very strongly about and why?: Keeping Planned Parenthood around. I just think low income women should have the same access to gynecological exams and life-saving procedures that rich women do. Defunding them is not going to stop abortion. 54. What was your favourite class from the last year that you were in school?: I really enjoyed Diversity and Health. I learned a lot about other cultures and how difficult access to healthcare is in other countries. I really think everybody should take that class. 55. What is a topic that you study independently for your own interest?: Politics or psychology, when I’m in the mood. 56. Describe what you would want to wear if you were getting married, handfasted, or having some kind of “love celebration” or “commitment” ceremony between yourself and another? A long white dress, probably lace with belled sleeves. 57. What song do you want played at your funeral?: "Tubthumping” by Chumbawumba. 58. Would you rather alphabetize or put things in order according to numbers?: Alphabetize 59. What medication do you dislike the most?: Antibiotics, they ruin my stomach. 60. Would you rather write a story or a poem?: Story. 61. Do you believe in non-physical entities, and if so have you ever communicated with one?: I don’t know if I do. I mean, I used to pray to God, but I’m not sure if that’s what you’re referring to. 62. What invention or discovery do you think that the scientific community should focus on?: I think they’re already focus on a lot of important priorities, like medical care, disease cure and treatment, etc. << Yeah. I work in medical research and I can tell you that we are extremely well funded.

63. If you could go anywhere, where would you go and why?: Anywhere? I’d go explore the west coast because I’ve never been there in my 24 years as a U.S. citizen. 64. What skill do people often compliment you on?: I don’t know. I don’t have any skills.<< 65. What are three facets of your personality or thinking patterns that you want to improve?: Social anxiety, self-doubt, hastiness 66. What is your favourite symbol?: $$$ 67. Name an unusual shortcut or file that’s on your desktop: There’s nothing unusual on my desktop, unless you think my Doge background is unusual, which if you do, FUCK YOU! Lol, just kidding. I don’t know. 68. What do you smell like right now?: Burberry Weekend 69. You get to have a theme party of your choice, just for fun. What theme do you choose?: 80′s! Even though it’s been done fifty billion times. I don’t care. 70. Have you ever been in the depths of a cave?: No 71. How do you deal with the dark side of yourself?: I listen to depressing music or watch fucked up movies. 72. Name something that you can’t help but save: Receipts. 73. What is your addiction?: Fries, pizza, online shopping 74. If you could wish something for three people, but not for yourself, who would the wishes be for and what would they be?: Health, happiness and money for everyone I love. << 75. Would you rather send a message in a bottle or on a balloon?: Balloon. 76. What did you dream last night?: I had a nightmare I was stabbed in the ghetto and ran to a guy in his car for help. I asked him to drive me to the hospital because I was bleeding a lot but he ended up taking me to the grocery store instead and made me wait for him to spend 10 minutes picking out fruit before he finally took me to the hospital. 77. What is one of your most frequent daydreams?: Quitting my job 78. What is your favourite stuffed animal?: My squirtle. 79. If you could have a conversation with any well-known figure of the past or present, who would it be and what would you want to talk about?: I really don’t know. 80. If you could bring anyone back to life, who would it be?: My uncle 81. Are you affectionate?: Yes 82. Name one thing that each of your best friends is really good at: Smoking pot. 83. What are you a perfectionist with?: Certain things at work. 84. Could you see yourself being able to carry on a long distance relationship?: I did it for 6 months. Granted, we were within driving distance, but it was still hard. 85. If you could be anything but human, including anything mythical, what would you be?: A unicorn. 86. Have you ever meditated? If so, what is your method, and if not, what do you do to relax?: I’ve done it a couple of times, it doesn’t really help. Usually breathing exercises and hot tea help. 87. What is something about yourself that you feel no one else understands?: I’m over analytical

#survey

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aparoxysm · 7 years

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all super detailed questions about Sally ✿♥‿♥✿

( @requicms , @sammrps --- koda, may and brandon are mentioned in this and you dont have to read because its HELLA LONG, but yeah. )

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?

Every once and a while I’ll stumble across a name and be like “WOW why don’t people use this name more??? i love it??” and at the time, Sally was one of them. I knew most people always associated it with Nightmare Before Christmas/Blink 182 and I wanted to defy that with a character. I chose Redmayne because I’m a piece of shit and she’s got red hair so sue me hahahahaha. I wish I’d chosen something else now tbh.

But Sally does mean “a sudden charge out of a besieged place against the enemy; a sortie.” which I think is unexpectedly more than accurate.

2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them?

Weak But Skilled, City Mouse, Control Freak, Daddy’s Girl, The Fashionista, The Fighting Narcissist, Ice Queen, Idle Rich, Insufferable Genius, Iron Lady,Lonely Rich Kid, The Prima Donna, Rich Bitch, Schemer, Socialite, Spoiled Brat.

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory?

In the grand scheme of things, Sally’s childhood was perfect. She grew up getting whatever it is she wanted, especially out of fear that since she’s adopted, if she didn’t, she would use her power to resent them for not being her biological parents. If there is anything that runs in their family, it is shallowness and insecurity. Good memories involve visiting holiday homes, travelling, going to broadway and fashion shows. Bad memories involve the first time she learned she was allergic to cats, swelling up to the size of twenty balloons and being hospitalized for a week, and her dad’s having to take time off.

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents?

On the over all, Sally has good relationships with both her adoptive parents. Jacob is a primadonna, a total diva, a socielite and a fashionista. She’s learned all of her high class, spoiled brat, fashion queen, superior antics from him. He likes to think he’s taught her everything there is to know about being a powerful woman among stupid men. She idolizes him

Peter, on the other hand, is far more reclusive and down to earth. He’s taught her the improtance of fairness, honesty and goodness. He was the one who always comforted her about her lonliness, the one who encouraged her to let herself be open to the idea of friendship with Kitty, he’s the one who’s always been there for a real piece of sound advice from the heart, rather than the head.

As for her birth parents, she’s met her mother, and they are nothing alike. She hasn’t yet gone to look for her father, but I hope to explore that soon.

5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults?

I think that she does and she doesn’t know it yet. I have in mind a half brother, from her father’s side. A Dane Dehaan, a real Jerk With A Heart Of Gold type character. Someone who is comfortably wealthy but doesn’t see eye-to-eye with his father’s success. And I think that they would connect on a level of being kept out in the cold. I’d love to explore the idea more, but for now, it’s just that.

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

She was ever studious and typically the person everyone hated because she reminded the teacher that there was assigned homework. She graduated with flying colours, then went on to Uni and got accepted into an amazingly prestigeous program that allowed her to study in France and finish her degree. I forget what it was called, but I reasearched the school and their degrees. It was a combination of Fashion and Science and how the two enterlocked, very Sally. Fibre science I think or something. She loved all of her subjects, she’s such a nerd. She especially liked writing essays though, anything with writing and she was getting 100%. I think she only hated the practical side of things, like she is okay at sewing but I don’t see her being amazing at it. I think she likes the theory of textiles and likes telling people how to make them.

7. Did they have lots of friends as a child? Did they keep any of their childhood friends into adulthood?

NOpe! Nic was headcanoned as her childhood friend since preschool, since her and his parents crossed over a lot with the town’s reputation. Jacob and Blanca were best of friends for many years so they pushed Sally and Nic to be the same, which they did, so there was that.

Otherwise in high school her only friend was Kitty. And after school, Koda. That was it basically. 3 Friends LOL. Now after all of that, she’s adding Brandon into the mix. She’s so picky with the people she shares herself with, I’m amazed she even has a handful.

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals?

Yes, her sweet little handbag dog, Amé. She was a birthday present a couple of years ago. She doesn’t really like animals no, they make her squeamish, but Amé is very quiet and gentlenatured, the perfect companion for Sally. She often is sleeping on Sally’s bed, her own doggy bed, or the couch. She’s kind of a quiet company for Sally, whom she sometimes talks to when she needs to vent her feelings. The only time Amé acts up is around people she doesn’t know, she gets way too excited and Sally hates it. She only likes when Amé is calm.

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals?

HAHA nope. Sally with a big dog would be her Worst Nightmare™.

10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?

She does and she doesn’t like children. Like with her dog, when they’re quiet and they behave, she loves them. The moment they throw a tantrum or are loud or messy, she has to tell herself to chill out or else she’ll have a melt down. I feel like children hate her, even when she tries to like them and goes out of her characteristic way to be nice. Theyre just like “NO” and shes like “ok listen here u little twit if you dont appreciate what i am doing for you ---”

So I think as a parent she would be very controlling. Too controlling and her partner would have to encourage her to ease up sometimes, that her children arent projects to be completely controlled, that making mistakes is part of learning and growing up. And that would be so hard for Sally to let happen. She was such a good behaved child and she let her parents condition every aspect of her (well, mostly Jacob), so not doing the same would just make no sense to her.

She would be the most spoiling and scary-when-mad godparent/babysitter/etc.

11. Do they have any special diet requirements? Are they a vegetarian? Vegan? Have any allergies?

For the longest time she was vegetarian and didn’t drink alcohol AT all. Now, with character development, she’s gone vegan but allowed herself to drink on special occasions. She does, however, have an immense allergy to cat hair and some medications.

12. What is their favourite food?

Sushi!!! (And her biggest guilty pleasure; macaroons. Dont let her near them she will eat them all uncontrollably. And feel ashamed every time.)

13. What is their least favourite food?

Meat.

14. Do they have any specific memories of food/a restaurant/meal?

Luis’ restauraunt ha ha ha. No but her and Nic used to always go for seafood, and she would break her vegetarian rules for him and eat shrimp. Now, I think she just enjoys going for green juices with May, and sushi train with Kitty. Also, take away will always remind her of Koda. And coffee dates, of Brandon. I feel like she has a scheduled day of the week for each other these hahaha.

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?

HAHAHAHA. Sally can’t cook, and she’d never really been interested in learning. Having a live-in housemaid kind of stopped her from learning to do anything domestic. She can’t cook, doesn’t know how to do laundry, and never got her driver’s lisence. She is a failure of a human in those aspects.

16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it?

Sally used to love doing crafts, and she would make cards every year for birthdays and holidays. So I imagine she still collects craft things for that, but never does it anymore because she’s too busy. They just kind of lay on her desk or in their craft box, never getting used.

Of course, she also collects shoes and clothes. Duh.

17. Do they like to take photos? What do they like to take photos of? Selfies? What do they do with their photos?

Not really, she’s never had an eye for photography, and she hasn’t really had the chance to understand how a proper DSLR works. Mostly I think because she doesn’t really like being in photos. I imagine Kitty would always be like “!!!” when she’s photographed at a social event, showing off the print and Sally is just lowkey trying not to snatch it and burn it (but also look at it a lot in secret first to notice all her shallow imperfections). If anything, I think she would take photos of her parents on vacations, or of Kitty because she’d be constantly thrown her phone like “TAKE A PHOTO OF ME WITH THESE DOLPHINS!! HERE, TAKE A PHOTO OF ME LOOKING HOT BY THE POOL!!! OH MY GOD, LET ME GO STAND OVER THERE, YOU CAN TAKE A PHOTO!!” but also she would force Sally to be in some as well.

18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else

Books: factual.Music: quiet, indie.Tv Shows: soap opera, dramatic not comical.Films: black and white, foreign with subtitles, romance, dark and philosophical themes.Video games; none.

19. What’s their least favourite genres?

Books: teen, sci-fi.Music: loud, obnoxious, rap, nsfw content.Tv Shows: comedic, ones that dont really follow a story line.Films: action.Video games; all.

20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes?

Okay she loves classic musicals. Like she is a big Les Misérables fan which is annoying because I hate it. I think she also LOVED the Lion King broadway show, Hairspray, Pracilla and like. Wicked obviously.

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?

Oh she has a temper alright. But at the same time, sometimes, she can have incredible patiences. Like if she knows it’s worth waiting for (Kitty’s soberity, Koda’s health regeneration, Brandon’s ability to let her in) she’ll be a as patient as a saint. But she does lose her temper a lot, and she just goes full on control freak mode. She becomes impossible to deal with, so you kind of just need to let her ride it out.

22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?

You’re impossible. / You’re insufferable. / I hate you. / Excuse me? / etc.

She will insult people for just about any reason she sees fit.

23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces?

Annoyingly good memory. She’ll remember something you said on Tuesday the 14th of April, 1982.

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?

She’s that impossible creature that sleeps on a bed of 100 pillows, with her hands neatly folded over her sternum, hair laid out like sleeping beauty. She sleeps on pastel silk sheets, the hardest matress you’ll probably ever feel, and she goes to bed at exactly 9.30 pm every night and wakes at 6am every day without fail.

25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves?

When people think they’re better or smarter than her. She’s got a shit sense of humour though, she isn’t used to being the one making the jokes. She’s not really that funny tbh. Nor does she usually find other people’s sense of humour worth her time. So if she laughs at things you say, you’ve made it.

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions?

She cannot sing to save her life, so I think she talks to herself a lot. But the upbeat, chipper kind of way, that you’d notice because you can’t ignore it. I think she also does random acts of kindness, and that is super uncharacteristic, so you would definitely notice that too.

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad?

The fact she’s lonely, the fact that her birth mother doesn’t want anything to do with her, the fact that she can’t have everything she wants at the drop of a hat, the fact that she doesn’t know how to make friends or feel normal like everyone else. And yeah, she’s got a lot of pent up emotion and doesn’t really know how to deal with being sad or disappointed. So I think mostly, she’ll go into her closet, shut the door and cry. She wont cry in front of someone else if she can help it. She’s too private about herself, she’d never let someone see she’s fallen from her perch.

28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?

That she’ll always feel how lonely she feels right now. Or that she’ll never have what everyone else has; friendship, family and a partner.

29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective?

I think it shocks her because to find out a persons fear, you need to be let in close to look at them, and she’s never expecting to be liked enough to be given that privilage. So she mostly falls silent, and just quietly thinks about it for a long time. Then, yeah, she gets protective and starts culling ways to help people achieve their goals rather than bring them down. Once she cares, she’s feircely supportive.

30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?

She goes for a 6.30 am run every day aside from Sundays and Mondays. Then she does yoga and pilates some other days, and has a very strict diet to keep the weight off. She was a bit chunkier in high school and the memory still horrifies her, even though it was just baby fat.

31. Do they drink? What are they like drunk? What are they like hungover? How do they act when other people are drunk or hungover? Kind or teasing?

Only on special occasions, like public events and holidays. I don’t think she’s ever been drunk before to be honest, but if she were to get drunk, just think of the scene where Kat Stratford drinks and starts dancing like a looney on the table, making a fool of herself. Yeah. Probably Sally lbh. Also, she’d get into political wars with everything, including a tree or chair.

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?

She wears a lot of Chanel the most, Prada shoes and handbags, and Gucci accessories. She wears lots of pasels, whites, creams, nudes, pinks, rosegolds, gold and browns. All the material is wears is high quality, and to sleep, she wears a pink silk nighty. She wears mineral cruelty free make up, and it’s all soft golds, browns, coppers and rose golds as well. She usually wears her hair up for work, down at home, and in a braid when she’s by herself or around someone she feels comfortable with. It’s her “chilled out” hair style, believe it or not.

33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties?

Pinks and whites, probably lacey tbh, and probably very expensive. She’s very much into haute couture so I can’t imagine her settling for non descript bonds or something. She probably has the most beautiful underwear sets that never go to any sexual use LOL.

34. What is their body type? How tall are they? Do they like their body?

She is short af. Hence why she likes to wear heels so often, even though she wears flats a lot, there’s no in between. While she’s skinny, I imagine she has lean thighs, like the kind people who run a lot get, and she hates it. She loves to run, and hates that it gives her “man calves and thighs”. It makes her hips look a little too big for her liking. She hates her body.

35. What’s their guilty pleasure? What is their totally unguilty pleasure?

Guilty: Macaroons. They go against her no-sugar diet, but she loves them too much to say no. Unguilty: acting superior towards everyone.

36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?

She is good at debating and organizing. She likes to plan events and organize everything from the guest list, to the menu, to the decorations. She also likes craft, and planning outfits. She can’t sing. AT all.

37. Do they like to read? Are they a fast or slow reader? Do they like poetry? Fictional or non fiction?

She loves reading, she always has. She likes to read books to learn, not for fictional pleasure. She’s a really, really fast reader. She can finish books in one sitting (which makes me so jealous). She does like poetry, but often the really ambiguous kind from authors not a lot of people are familiar with. Non fiction, 100%.

38. What do they admire in others? What talents do they wish they had?

She wishes she could relax and dance silly like Kitty, just to make people smile and to feel true freedom. She wishes she could speak more languages (even though she can speak 5 and write 3). She wishes she could be normal, and she admires people for their adaptability and empathy.

39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging?

Oh the romantic in her loves them, but the old fashioned prude in her loves them too. She sends lots of letters, but also uses emails for work a lot. She likes all of them.

40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?

Energy drinks? No. Coffee? Yes. Sugary foods? No. She is hyped up on her own sense of crazy so she doesn’t really need any of these.

41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?

Heterosexual.

Things she finds attractive; good wit, chivalry, sense and reason, sensible people, smart people, business savvy people, a good suit, cleanshaven and expensive cologne, wealth and passion.

What she wants in a relationship; romance, support, devotion.

What she needs in a relationship; respect of privacy, trust, honesty.

42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?

Her goals lay in the fashion industry, she wants to work in a BIG and well known company, where she can boss people around and choose looks for approaching seasons. She likes to buy for companies, rather than design. She likes being the one who chooses what’s hot and what’s not.

She would sacrifice her dream of having a family if it meant getting the career of her dreams.

Personal goals include getting married and having children.

Her secret ambition is to finally be okay with who she is as a person, and stop trying to live to her expectation of what everyone else thinks is right and just.

43. Are they religious? What do they think of religion? What do they think of religious people? What do they think of non religious people?

Yes, she’s a Christian. She goes through phases of practicing, she used to a lot more when she was younger, but now she likes to practice quietly and in privacy. She thinks non religious people are missing out.

44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most?

Spring, because florals! But also autumn, because autumn colours are so her colours. She likes the filler seasons because she doesn’t like extreme heat or cold. Her perfect weather is no wind, but a slight chill in the air. She doesn’t do well with ice and snow OR heat and sunburn. She complains about the cold the most I think.

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?

They usually see her as stuck up, bossy, annoying, spoiled, narcassistic, and controlling. And tbh it’s not much different to how she sees herself, becuse she does acknowledge all of those traits in herself. But it kind of makes her sad too, because rather than trying to prove people wrong, she puts up a guard. If that’s what they think? Then good for them, they’re missing out, they’ll never get to see how much love she actually has to give, or how supportive, loyal and caring she can be.

46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?

HA, no way. People hate her on sight generally. Usually she introduces herself with a look of really not wanting to be there. She’s very snobby, so you’ll be able to tell instantly if she likes you or not. Other than that, when she knows it’s in her best interest not to be rude, she’s fake. She’s so shiny plastic fake, that it’s usually easy to see through as well.

47. How do they act in a formal occasion? What do they think of black tie wear? Do they enjoy fancy parties and love to chit chat or loathe the whole event?

Shiny plastic fake, as put just before. She adores formal occasions and events, she loves black tie events, but she loves white tie more. Being invited to prestigious events makes Sally believe she’s worth something, even though she knows that without all the wealth and notoriety, these people are basically nothing. She likes the entrepreneurial air of fancy parties, the networking, the gossip. She likes feeling included in something that really couldn’t care less if she turned up or not. :/

48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend?

Yes, the big, fancy, corperate types. You won’t catch her at a bar, club or house party though to save her life. Not unless Kitty literally bound and dragged her there. She likes to organize any formal event she can, if she can get her name on the commitee list, she will put 110% towards making sure it’s a big success.

If she’s being dragged to a party, Sally normally sits uncomfortably and turns down every drink/food offered to her. She complains the whole time, looks upset and unsettled, and asks when she can go home all night. Probably leaving of her own accord once Kitty gets too drunk. (with or without her).

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

Her day planner, it has her life inside it, and she relies so heavily upon it I’m not sure what she’d do without it. It goes everywhere with her yes, along with her phone because of her calendar. She’s always got something on in the next five minutes, whether it’s actually something important or “bathroom break”.

She’s very sentimental though. She remembers her first pair of shoes she bought herself, the first Chanel dress her father gave her, the necklace she got for her birthday, the complimentary pack she got from her first fashion show as a somebody, the shrivelled balloon from the first birthday party Kitty ever threw for her, etc. Those things stay with her forever, and she keeps them very dear to her cold, stony heart.

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials?

Her day planner. Facial and body clenses. A hair brush/comb. Her phone. A smart pair of flats. Her passport and another form of ID. Hand cream. A travel sized perfume. Hand sanitizer and a packet of sanitizer wipes. An echo bottle of water. A good quality sweater in case she gets cold. Asprin and an epipen.

#ch: sally #fuck me this is long #holy christ i love (and hate) you hahahaha #cathasmuse

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jaclynnicole-blog · 6 years

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CALI TRIP 2018

So after the craziness of living in a rental all Summer 2017 into beginning of Fall, then staying with my sister and her husband in Orlando until October when our new house was ready to move into. For those of you that actually read my blog, you would know most of my California trips take place around September, but this was all postponed. By the time we moved in and got settled it was the Holiday season and I knew I wouldn’t be able to visit then...But I had an idea of when a good time to go was right after the Holidays...I booked my trip (In October) for my annual week trip to California for end of January 2018! Perfect to start off the New Year!

Now my plans for my trip was the usual Photoshoots for my online magazine with my friend and photographer Ken...BUT I had to also work my trip around attending my favorite Talk Show “The Real”! The one thing I knew for sure was I was planning to attend the show at least two days in a row. Everything else time wise was planned kind of last minute with talents and availability.

DAY 1: MONDAY, JANUARY 22ND 2018

As my trip started getting closer I got more and more prepared and everything started coming together! I was so excited to get back out there with kind of skipping a year I was so ready! Getting up at 4:30am was so worth it all! My dad and I headed to the airport around 5:30am. We got there just in time to grab a quick bite (Yay for Chick-Fil-A!). Went through security and made it onto my flight (One of the last ones! LOL!). My flight and times always seem to be the same exact flights so flight left Tampa airport around 7:20am. As soon as we took off started by keeping busy with music and reading the beginning of my book (The Hunger Games, yes I am little behind!). A few hours in I decided to start watching a movie, “Gifted”. Was a great movie I had wanted to see for awhile (Thanks Delta!). Tried to rest my eyes but definitely couldn’t fall asleep knowing the week full of plans! 5 hours later we landed at LAX! Walking off the plane I felt super excited for everything to come! I picked up my luggage at baggage claim and made myself comfortable in one of the chairs in the airport for a bit. It was around 10am so I had a bit of time to kill before my friend was going to pick me up from the airport. Around 10:30am I headed to the restroom to change into my Rising Talent Magazine Shirt and refresh before heading out as I had something super amazing and a special opportunity that literally had come up the night before my trip! As I got myself together, I reflected back to my 2016 trip to Cali and other trips each has been so different and this one was going to be just as unique and fun! So around 11:30am I got picked up and we headed to our first destination on location for a very special meeting with an young and upcoming Actress Mackenzie Hancsicsak,who many would recognize as “Young Kate” on the NBC Hit Series “This Is Us”! Yes, we were headed to their on location set! We got to our location a little after Noon...We ended up heading to eat lunch in the local mall before meeting. Mackenzie and her mom were willing to meet us in between during lunch hour so we although we didn’t have much time we fit in as much as we could in a short amount of time. Walking up into the trailer meeting Mackenzie and her mom was a special moment. I started out interviewing Mackenzie right in her trailer coming up with questions in my head. We then headed outside to snap a few photos of Mackenize for the cover. Many trailers around set we used it as a Behind the Scenes look and went with it. Walking around us were some of the other young talented actors from set, Lonnie Chavis and Parker Bates. We said hello and introduced ourselves in between our photoshoot. After we finished, we ended up talking with Mackenzie’s mom for a bit before leaving after 2pm. We headed to my friend’s house for the night to get ready for the long days ahead and went from there. Just relaxing for the night, I got prepared and confirmed everything and plans for the next day.

DAY 2: TUESDAY, JANUARY 23RD 2018

Well, part of this day and the next deserve its own blog post so I won’t go into too much detail here... Although I didn’t have to be in LA until 10:30am. We still left pretty early to be prepared for traffic etc. Couldn’t be late to what I had most anticipated 2016 trip, this trip and probably for every trip for now on. I was able to get tickets to my favorite talk show The Real. More details in my next blog post about the show itself and my experience at the show a 3rd and 4th time. After the show I had a planned Photoshoot with two young talents and at an outside location Grififth Park and the Travel Town Museum. Wasn’t too far from The Warner Brothers Lot that I was at for the talk show, so it worked out perfect. After 3pm we had set to meet. I was meeting Actress Shae Smolik who has been part of many movies among other projects and Singer Kacey FiField. We started out by taking photos and behind the scenes footage at The Travel Town Museum which had many trains and scenery that was perfect and different for my magazine. We then headed not far off to Griffifth Park for a few more photos and to film the interviess. Was super fun and loved meeting a few of the talents that I had been corresponding with for awhile online. Shae had recently taken over my Instagram to go behind the scenes of a movie she was filming on her last day with the movie. So when we finished it up was around 5pm and we headed back to my photographer and friend’s house and headed out to dinner with his wife and family. Was a long day but we made it work and I was super excited for another very jam packed day the next day, Wednesday.

DAY 3: WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 24TH 2018

So this day was pretty similar to my Tuesday although it was kind of flipped, LOL! We started with Photoshoots at around 9am so we getting up at 6am was a must to make it out to LA at the right time. We were headed to the LA Skyline area for a few photos with a different a feel to them than we usually take. I again had set up two young talents at the same time. One was a talented Dancer Bella who I had come to know through Instagram. I had promised her next time I had come out to California I would meet up with her for some photos. The other young talent was Actress Scarlett Fernandez who is well known from ABC’s Soap Opera “:General Hospital”. I was super excited to meet Scarlette being I have watched GH since I was a teen and love Scarlett’s character. My photographer and I had grabbed a hot coffee before our long morning and met up with the young talents starting out with the interviews. Bella was first then came Scarlett. We then headed over to the LA Bride and Skyline to start taking photos for the feature. I had to finish before Noon to make it over to the Warner Brothers Lot for me to attend Day 2 of my favorite talk show, The Real. I would have gone everyday if I could but couldn’t make it happen. We said our goodbyes and I headed to Burbank to the studio . I was super excited to attend the talk show again I don’t even think I ate much LOL! Again, I will elaborate more about my second day attending The Real in its own blog post I promise as soon as I finish this one! Once I got out of the show it was pretty late and we headed back to my friend’s house. We two headed out for a quick bite and took in everything that had happened the past 3 days. I couldn’t believe it was Wednesday. Half way through the week already. Time definitely flies when you are keeping busy and having fun. When we got back to the house, I was actually relieved the next two days was just more relaxing for me and to prepare for the busy weekend planned before I left the next Monday.

DAY 4: THURSDAY, JANUARY 25TH 2018

So I definitely tried to sleep in knowing I had no plans but I couldn’t help to think my trip was half done with already. I actually took the time to go through the photos from the Photoshoots we had done so far during the week by organizing and editing some on my own. Took half a day to organize it all but I felt much better afterwards. I then did some catching up on some of my daily shows like yes, the talk show I attended, The Real. But first I had to watch a full day of my Soap Opera, General Hospital. I knew I would feel much better knowing when I got home I wouldn’t have to sit and watch a week’s worth of two different shows from being away.

DAY 5: FRIDAY, JANUARY 26TH 2018

So again Rest Day 2 was definitely more relaxing. I set aside the whole day to catch up on my talk show, The Real. I even made it to that present day episode which happened to be one of the ones they filmed that I attended earlier in the week (More about that in my next blog post). I couldn’t help but to look back to earlier in the week when I attended that episode and smile. I deifnitely appreciated my two days of relaxation as my 2014 trip I ended up catching a bad cold and wasn’t up for much. I felt this was much needed and a way to clear my head from the rush of everything all week. I prepared for the next day knowing we had a ton of shoots planned a a new studio Saturday.

DAY 6: SATURDAY, JANUARY 27TH 2018

Our plans for the day consisted of four Photoshoots at a local studio. The talents weren’t set to show up until around Noon. We headed to the studio to get there around 11am to start setting up as we had each shoot planned with a theme. My friend and Photographer was super excited to use his Bentley for a few shoots and was the first thing we got in place (Of course we drove it there!). As he was setting up around 11:30am my first talent showed up, Kirsten Denina, a young Dancer who had won a contest I held through Instagram over a year ago. It was so great to FINALLY meet her! She came all the way from Vegas and was so patient in waiting for me to come out to California so I can meet her. She brought her winning item which was a Diva Dolly Light Up Makeup Case from an awesome company I have been collaborating with for a few years now. When Kirsten got there we started right away with her interview and she had even worn her Rising Talent Magazine Shirt she purchased last year from me. Once interview was finished, and we had set up for some basic shots in front of a white background, Kirsten was ready. Around 12:30pm the next talent showed up, Actress Ava Cantrell who I had been corresponding with her and her mom for a few years now. She showed up early to prepare for the shoot. Kirsten started her photos around 1pm and we would switch in and out with Kirsten and Ava. I slipped in an interview with Ava before she headed for some more photos. Around 1:30pm, Dancer Tiana Heaton had shown up for her 2pm slot. I had been talk with Tiana and her mom through Instagram for over a year through a project I had her do for my magazine, so it was super great to finally meet her in person as well! She too had a Rising Talent Shirt so she slipped it on to start with. I filmed her interview in the shirt, and then we headed over the background to do a few photos with the RTM Shirt and Tiana. In between we were working with Kirsten and Ava as well. In between all of this, last minute I was able to get Scarlett Fernandez and her mom to stop by for a few quick studio shots, since most were done in the sun and outside the first day. I am so glad Scarlett was able to make it to the studio (the studio photos came out gorgeous!) Soon after, a very talented Singer and our last talent set to come showed up Ruby Jay. Now Ruby and her mom had made plans to meet during my 2016 trip to California but it hadn’t worked out, so here we were making it work this trip! We got right into photos with Ruby and once finished we topped it off with an interview and a little bit of singing from Ruby. Did I mention each talent had at least two outfits they took photos in? Since Ava and Ruby were introduced to each other had become friends and Ava happened to still be there we all decided to head to a late dinner. We all decide don Lazy Dog a place I had gone to my last trip following another shoot. We all chatted and hung out for hours probably from 5pm to after 8pm. After making our way outside, we talked for a bit longer and ended up not heading home until after 8:30/9pm. By the time we got home, I think I would say the longest days of my trip we were beat. Many photoshoots in such a short amount of time. Realizing I only had one more full day left of my trip to California I was trying to stay positive and keep my mind off heading home.

DAY 7: SUNDAY, JANUARY 28TH 2018

So this Sunday was something that came up last minute as well but I was super determined to meet two talented kids that I had been following on Instagram for a few years now. Kelei who had worked on a dance project for my magazine had recently moved out to Californiai, so I was super excited to work something out with her! Dancer Kylee Paige another young adorably talented dancer who I had also promised I would get together with for some photos the next time I came out. Before our scheduled time to meet both of them, around 1pm...My photographer and I met up with a talent and Actress Casey Burke well known from ABC’s “The Middle” for a little Mexican Lunch at a place I had been to my last visit. Super fun to get to know Casey who had done a few studio photos with my photographer but I definitely wanted to meet up to feature her on the cover, so we made it work after over a year of waiting LOL! So three more photoshoots to end my last day in California. At 1pm, we met up at my photographer’s work place for some awesome photos on some train tracks with all three of them. I started with Casey doing an interview right in the conference room. Then came the two girls and we took a few fun photos for memories and then headed out to start the photoshoots. I think it was around 3 or 4pm we finished with the shoot and I went back in to finish up the interviews with the two young talents. Once we said our goodbyes, it was time to head back home. Once we got back to the house, I immediately started to organize the rest of the photos from the last few days onto my flash drive and edit what I could. around 7pm we headed back out to pick up what I just had to have before leaving California, can you guess it? In N Out! YES! Couldn’t leave without it! Came back to the house, only to still work on the photos. I love looking through what went on throughout the week and all the amazing work my photographer and friend does to help me out. We always have so much fun and take in every opportunity we can. I think it was already around 10 or 11pm when I finally finished with what I felt I needed to do before leaving the next day.

DAY 8: MONDAY, JANUARY 29TH 2018

Although my flight wasn’t until 10:30am, I again had to leave pretty early around 7:30am. I arrived at the airport a little before 9am. I printed out my boarding pass, turned in my luggage, went through security and then looked to grab some food. I am not really a breakfast person, so I grabbed a sandwich and headed to the seating area where they board. I was all set to go home, but truly did not want to leave. How fast my trip went by was probably the craziest part. Getting on the plan to get my mind off heading home, I quickly turned on a movie, “Home Again”. I think little by little I started tearing up because I knew this trip was over. Reflecting back each of my trips out to California have been super different but each one also has been really special in their own way. Every time I got to book my flight for my next trip out to California, I always feel unprepared, but as I get closer to the date everything always seems to work itself out. Trying to make plans with talent ahead of time isn’t always the easiest schedule wise but again things always seem to work out in the end. I even have a few talents set up for my next trip (Cross your fingers it all works out!)! Landing and meeting my dad at the Tampa airport I was super quiet, tired, overwhelmed. When I got home, I immediately unpacked and tried to catch up on a few shows before heading to bed.

*BE SURE TO READ MY NEXT BLOG POST ABOUT MY EXPERIENCE BEING BACK AT MY FAVORITE TALK SHOW THE REAL!*

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helmes-deep · 7 years

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If you could write a twenty-year flash forward for each of the Heck family members, what would it be? Write out each character's situation (including jobs, marriage, and number of kids) individually.

Hey, anon!! 👀 (Is this the same person who sent me The Middle asks from yesterday?? Is it okay if I call you “Heck-anon??” haha :3)

Kk so the kids are like already 20 now, so if we flash-forward 20 years wouldn’t Sue be like… 40??? haha and Frankie and Mike would probably be dead… >..> But I get what you mean~ lololol. I’m just gonna put down what I think will happen to everyone in the future:

Frankie and Mike: Kk so I’m going to put these two together since they’re inseparable :33 After all of their kids got married and moved out, Frankie and Mike are now both retired (although Mike still came to work everyday at the quarry until about a year ago). They miss each of their kids immensely, but when the holidays or family get-togethers roll around – or when they’re asked to babysit any of the grandchildren – they remember why they kicked everyone out in the first place :33 They, especially Frankie, love it when either Axl or Sue calls them up to visit the big city where both of the two older kids are living now. As in-laws, they also both spend wayyyyyyyyyy too much time at the Donahues now, mooching off of Nancy’s extremely delicious food. Frankie puts up a fight about where the kids should spend Christmas or Thanksgiving (either at hers or the Donahues’) every year, but always ends up not cooking anything and “allowing” Nancy to do it. Maybe they always stay/eat at the Hecks’ though?? haha. I’d also like to see maybe a storyline where the Donahues end up spending a lot of time at the Hecks’ and end up becoming a little bit like them lol.

Axl Heck: I think Axl is still trying to search for his calling. I think he’ll go through a bunch of phases working with different types of people of various occupational backgrounds and go through a ton of different business ventures before he more permanently settles down into the business world. And it won’t be business-business exactly: Axl goes into marketing. Because while he’s not very good at coming up with ideas or executing them (we’ve kind of seen that with his many lame ideas throughout the show lol), Axl has a knack for talking someone’s ear off and convincing them that something is good for them. So I think he’ll end up doing that (maybe working with Kenny??) for a good part of his life. After that he and Lexie, with all of their money, might put it to good use and start help funding projects for upcoming entrepreneurs that they think are good and profitable and/or donate to a lot of charities. Somewhere along the way Axl might come up with one good idea that ends up being a stable side-hustle. He and Lexie are married and have three kids: one boy, one girl, and another son (just like Frankie and Mike lol :’33). He can’t stand his eldest, is super-protective of his daughter, and tries harder to not forget about his third lol (during family get-togethers, he’s proud to tell Brick and brags to Mike that at least he remembers his third kid’s birthday and wasn’t watching football when he was born lol). After he and Lexie got married, they moved to the city with Sean and Sue, live fairly close to each other (or maybe right next door??), and go on double dates. Honestly though, I would also love to see a storyline where, maybe after searching for his calling and going through a bunch of odd jobs/business ventures, Axl ends up doing something that nobody would expect – like a teacher or school counselor lol.

Sue Heck Donahue: Sue’s now married to Sean Donahue and loves being called Mrs. Sue Sue Donahue~~!! After Sean finished med school, proposed to Sue, and they got married (in a beautiful outdoor wedding), the two of them moved out into the city, where Sean is an accomplished and very respected doctor at one of the main/biggest hospitals there. After graduating with a degree in hotel management, Sue has worked her way up to the manager position of a four-and-a-half-star hotel after having done some odd management stints at a few other businesses (smaller hotels, resorts, golf clubs, one of Axl’s horrendous business ventures). She later found a strong passion for DIY, however, and ends up starting her own small DIY/crafts-making/homegoods on something like Etsy. Her always too cute, carefully made, affordable, and sometimes sparkly-themed products are really popular with mothers and girls ages 8-16 lol. Her tagline would probably be something like “Always made with care ❤” haha. She finds that this new line of work fits perfectly into her schedule as a full-time mom. She and Sean have three kids: a boy, two girls (twins), and maybe another boy a bit later. She is always finding ways to be a wonderful next door neighbor (maybe to Lexie and Axl?? xD) by bringing them freshly homemade goods. She and Sean always come home for the holidays, no matter what. In their spare time, they go on dates to the latest musicals leoool~

Brick Heck: I don’t think Brick will have any kids. Maybe sometime way, wayyy, later in life, but I don’t see him having any anytime soon (but all his nieces and nephews love hearing him tell and read them stories, as well as all the children at the library lol). Instead, he lives with his two dogs Bettie and Peete (these could totally be different names, I just randomly made some up lol), and his wife Cynthia (idk if this person will be the same as Cindy – guess we’ll just have to see when the show ends!!). He’s an author now – published, and distinguished. He’s known for his critically acclaimed sci-fi/fantasy book series (people say it’s the century’s next Planet Nowhere), but lately he’s really been into translating and calligraphy/typography and reads and researches on those two subjects all the time. He’s also the president of some officially-instated font association. He goes on book tours across America, going on book signings and readings of his popular book series (really the only social events he enjoys), is really involved with Cynthia in advocating for children’s literacy (and therefore visits libraries, too), and still loves going to the library to peruse the shelves for a good new read, even though libraries are practically obsolete by now. He’s also been to Europe (either for a book tour or not). In his spare time, he likes to take long walks with Cynthia and their two dogs. He lives the closest to Frankie and Mike, never having moved far from them. Sometimes Frankie and Mike join them (and feel really left out of their intellectual literary conversations lol).

Honestly my musings could most definitely change as the series progresses, but these are kind of my half-baked thoughts on how I wan’t/don’t want the series to end :33 Hope you enjoyed reading it!!

#I wrote like a whole essay lol #yikes!!#asked #anonymous

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surveyjunkie · 7 years

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1. Do you like zombie movies? Yes. Even though they’re all pretty similar, they’re always entertaining and keep me on the edge of my seat.

2. What’s the grossest/worst thing you’ve ever seen in a public restroom? Poop smeared all over the walls. It was an experience. <<

3. What’s the most wasteful thing you regularly do? Eat out when I have food at home

4. What’s the most difficult apology you’ve ever had to give? I can’t remember.

5. What’s the worst relationship advice you’ve ever seen? I’m sure I’ve read some pretty bad ones from magazines, but I can’t remember what they were

6. Have you ever volunteered in a hospital? If not, would you ever want to? Yes, I used to volunteer at the hospital that I work at now.

7. What was your worst Halloween costume? I don’t know? I wouldn’t say any of them were bad...some were basic, but not bad.

8. Who has/had the worst reputation in your graduating class? The people with the worst reputations didn’t graduate.

9. When was the first time you can remember feeling mature? I don’t really ever feel mature.

10. Have you ever had a disappointing Christmas, or any disappointing holiday if you don’t celebrate Christmas? I’ve had many disappointing Christmases in the past. Lately they haven’t been so bad.

11. Do you have any character band-aids in your house right now, or just plain ones? Just plain ones.

12. Have you ever had to give a pet away? No, thankfully.

13. What’s the junkiest junk food you’ve ever eaten? White Castle

14. Did you play pretend a lot as a child? Were there any recurring plots or themes? LOL yeah, when I was about 7/8 my friend Jess and I would pretend we were Native Americans in her basement....we always acted like we were from different tribes and didn’t get along with each other...it was like some weird drama we made up.

15. How do you feel about runny egg yolks? I mean, I don’t feel a certain way about them. I’d rather eat scrambled or boiled eggs though

16. Has a teacher ever tried to teach you something that was undeniably wrong? I’m sure I have

17. If for some reason you had to give up one of your hobbies, which would you choose? Working out

18. Have you ever hidden a relationship from your family? For a short period of time

19. How much do you know about first aid? Not very much.

20. Which of your relatives do you know the least about? Second cousins on my mom’s side. I know all of my cousins on my dad’s and am relatively close to them, but for whatever reason I know nothing about the cousins on my mom’s side, aside from her brother’s children.

21. Have you ever meditated? If so, did it do anything for you? Once, it helped me relax

22. Have you ever given advice to someone who was much older than you? I’ve given advice to my mom and my boss before.

23. Have you ever used a view-master? Yes! I used to love them.

24. Do you ever listen to talk radio or podcasts? If you do, what are some of your favorite shows? No

25. When was the last time you got ice cream from a truck? Ugh it’s been forever

26. Are any of your favorite bands broken up or on hiatus right now? Smashing Pumpkins hasn’t released anything new in a good while now. Sublime is not the same band anymore without Bradley. Alt-J hasn’t come out with anything since 2014.

27. Do you know any sex workers? If so, how do they feel about their job? My Human Sexuality professor from college used to be a phone sex operator. That was her big secret that she revealed to the class at the end of the semester. She said the job itself got boring and repetitive after a while, but she never felt ashamed about what she did.

28. What’s the biggest art project you’ve ever attempted? How did it go? Ummm, there was one back in high school where we had to create a series of 10 paintings for one project. I don’t think mine went too well. I don’t like being forced to paint stuff, it just comes naturally for me.

29. What kind of wild animals do you see most frequently where you live? Deer or squirrels

30. Have you ever cooked anything other than s’mores over a fire? Hot dogs and peppers

31. Are there any items in your house that you use for something other than its intended purpose? We’re currently using tupperware bins as TV stands in the apartment and covering them with tapestries.

32. What do you hope the afterlife is like? Hopefully it will take place on another planet, where our species is way more evolved, advanced, and civilized than the human race.

33. What’s the worst behavior you’ve ever seen from a child? My brother was pretty bad when he was growing up, and that’s not me exaggerating or being biased.

34. Have you ever planned an act of revenge? Yes. Fell through though.

35. Do you and your parents share any of the same hobbies? The only thing we all have in common is that we like to drink.

36. Do you think it’s more exciting or scary to get older? Scary. I like being 24 and I wish I could just stay this age.

37. How was the reception of the last wedding you attended? AWESOME.

38. Do you have any physical photo albums? I have one from when we took a family vacation to Disney World in 2002

39. Would you feel comfortable working at a sex shop? Yeah.

40. Who was the worst friend you ever had? Oh man I’ve had a lot of shitty friends, but one of them definetely takes the price. We had that kind of friendship where you joke around constantly, and it was all fun. Until after a few months where I could sense a change in the over all atmosphere of our frienship. The jokes became tougher and more and more ruthless. In the last few months he was basically bullying me, giving me shit for everything I did. He made fun of my music taste, my style, my hair, my face, my personality, everything. He basically broke my confidence to a point where I tried changing the way I was for him to not pick on me. I became super depressed and I was close to taking my own life several times. People around me started noticing that he was bullying me, and when they asked me about it, I just told them it was nothing and that I was just being sensitive if I felt offended about what he told me. I remember one morning where he was picking at me, and I told him I was feeling like shit and that my mental health was doing really bad, and I actually apologized for it. I told him I was sorry for being quiet, when my mind was just spinning around the thought of not wanting to live. He told me that it wasn’t strange, that I was just being boring as usual. At that point, I understood that he didn’t give a shit about me, and I started avoiding him. Nowadays, he’s still mad at me. According to him, I betrayed him by starting to avoid him. He’s a dick, to say the least.<< DUDE. I had a friend just like this in high school. She was a girl but was the exact same way. Always making rude jokes about my appearance in public, specifically my small breasts, and making fun of literally everything I did, and then would tell me I was being dramatic whenever I got mad at her for it. Like, I understand friends joking around with each other about things like that every and now and then, but this was literally ALL. THE. TIME. She’d tell me to stop being so sensitive and take a joke. She also would tell me I had no right to feel depressed or sad because I had a good life instead of understanding and comforting me like a decent fucking person, and recognizing that mental health issues affect everyone. So when I finally stopped hanging out with her, she got pissed and removed me as a friend from Facebook. Good riddance.

41. What’s the biggest sacrifice you’ve ever made? Probably choosing to be in a long distance relationship for 6 months, but it turned out to be worth it

42. Have you ever campaigned for a political candidate, or otherwise played an active roll in an election? I mean, I voted in the last two elections.

43. What’s the coolest hand-me-down you’ve ever gotten? What about the best one you’ve ever given? I’m not sure

44. Do your parents and grandparents get along with each other? Yes

#survey

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