#I remember when my mother told me about this and was like 'your grandfather's neighbors had their barn burn down'

[fox-bright]

A dream.

I dreamed I was an orphan child, dressed mostly in rags, following a caravan. Horses, carts, wheelbarrows, maybe mostly a merchant caravan? There were guards, and they kept me from getting too close to beg for food.

An old man all in black and dark blue started sharing his food with me in the evenings, and his fire. It was a several-month journey, and I was sticking as near the caravan as I could creep, so that I'd be safer from bandits that preyed on travelers in the desert. I never saw the old man sleep, but once in a while he said he'd keep watch while I did so, and I grew fond of him pretty quickly.

Mostly what I remember of him from the dream was that he told stories. Not the kind I was used to, not the funny stories about who tricked whom or who got kicked by a horse when they tried to sneak into a woman's blankets, they were stories about palace intrigues and the movements of armies, complicated things that always seemed ultimately to have a moral--avoid cruelty, avoid greed, consider the effects of your actions on the people around you. I asked "Are you a monk?" and he tilted his head and smiled, and said nothing.

Bit by bit, my being seen with him brought me closer to the caravan. Eventually I was allowed to sleep within the glow of its firelight. A little while later, one of the kinder guards would slip me bits of dried meat when he thought no one else was looking, and once or twice even tangy dried fruit. Someone, or someone's mother, gave me a pair of shoes that a child had outgrown on the trip. I don't think I'd had shoes before, only sometimes wrapped rags around my feet if the air was cold. It seemed that everyone knew the man--and lots of him did, in fact, call him That Monk--and knew him to be a good judge of character. It seemed that the old man was known for good deeds, for the quiet word that interrupted an argument, for tireless effort to help in times of trouble (mending a cart wheel, caring for a sick horse or injured herd dog), for feeding hungry children like me.

With acceptance came other conversations, sidelong at first and then openly, about the weather and where we'd all come from, about where we were going and what we hoped to be when we got there. I didn't have any particular reason to think that the new city I was headed to would be kinder to me than the last, but home hadn't been safe for me anymore, and if I was very lucky I could find some sort of apprenticeship. One of the merchants hoped to become rich, another had already traveled this route a dozen times in his life, and scoffed at the idea. A grandmother was going to be with her son and his family, now that her husband was in the ground--she couldn't wait to see the sea again, after her entire adult lifetime spent so far from where she'd been born.

That Monk didn't have any goal, he said. The older merchant murmured that he'd encountered him more than once on this road, over the years, and that he'd already been known here when the merchant was young. "He doesn't settle." he said. "Maybe his sort can't."

All the same, I tried to convince him. "If I get an apprenticeship I could afford us a room. It's going to be autumn when we make it to the city, you should at least stay through the winter." I hadn't had any dreams about family in a long time, and he'd become precious to me. I harassed him for two weeks, until finally he sat me down alone after the rest of the caravan was asleep and said he was going to tell me something he hadn't told anyone else in a long, long time.

And he told me another story:

"Long ago, when I was young and fierce, I was also very wealthy, and thought that gave me virtue. I was the brightest son of a family of strong warriors, raised to know that everything I looked upon belonged to me, and I could do as I would. And oh, I did. I wreaked war on my neighbors on all sides, and added their wealth to my own. My father eventually joined our grandfathers in the afterlife, and I became the ruler. To do honor to my forebears, I conquered without mercy. I burned villages if they would not submit to my rule, I sacked cities, I ordered the deaths of as many people as there are fish in the Yangtze. And my empire flourished and shone, and I was glad.

As I grew older, of course there were rebellions. And I and my captains put them down. Once, there was an attempt at a coup within my own palace. I had the ringleaders tortured to death publicly over the course of a week, and held a feast while their families were driven into the desert. The face of the world was changed by my hand, and I reckoned it only appropriate, because after all I was strong. And bit by bit, violence by violence, I grew old.

When the fever came, I knew that I would not survive it. I had already assigned duties to my heirs, as I would not see my great empire destroyed by bickering after I was gone, and I settled riches on my wives, and I knew the rattling in my chest was an announcement of my fate.

I grew very weak. I thought about what was to happen to me next, about what gleaming company I would enter as I died, about my grandfathers and the stories we would tell about our triumphs. Half-dreaming, sick and delirious, I saw them arrayed about me in their armor and their finery, and I waited to see them smile and welcome me. But their faces were hard with grief. And I knew all at once that I had no time left, and that I was about to be consigned to one of the bitterest hells. I had committed so many acts of war, to no purpose but to add to my majesty. I had caused so many to die, and killed so many with my own hands, that the weight of their suffering would drive me down for the rest of time. I was filled with despair and self-loathing.

I had known some power beyond that of the spear, and I had read many books, and with my last breath I made a bargain. I said, let me not yet enter hell. Let me instead try to rebalance my karma, let me do good where for so long I have done violence. And my grandfathers said, You have no time. And I begged them, I do not ask to live. I only ask to find some way to atone.

And I opened my eyes for the last time, and I was alone in the room. And I closed my eyes."

I looked at him in disbelief, where he leaned back against against a bag beside the dimming fire, all his darkness limned in gold. His eyes were narrowed to slits, and I did not think he watched me. I took a long breath. "It is a story." I said. "It is." he said. "Go to sleep."

I slept.

When I woke into a bright morning, I did not ask him again to stay with me. I did not ask him for anything at all. The mother who had given me her boy's shoes watched me with concern, and rested her palm on my forehead for a minute. After some quiet discussion with her group, she said that today, I could ride on her cart and rest.

But I was a child, and children smooth things over. And after all I had been alone for so long, without an adult to trust, why would I throw this one away? Life went back to normal.

We were very near the city now. Near enough that the guards began to be on edge, because with proximity came greater danger. We hadn't seen any bandits on the road, had once seen a cloud of dust on the horizon that came from the hooves of many horses but had never been close enough to hear their riders. But there is no point to raiding a merchant caravan unless you can sell what you take from it, and cities have many people who would buy from anyone. So it was perhaps inevitable that the last night we would be camping outside, we were attacked.

I snapped awake to the sounds of screaming horses, and screaming people. My fire had died down, but I could see the rest of the caravan's fires being stoked bright, I could see women thrusting their children behind them. I heard laughter from the shadows behind me, and when I turned there were bandits, their faces very cheerful and upsetting. They were between me and the safety of the caravan, so I ran into the dark.

I was small, and not very strong. I didn't get far. There were half a dozen of them here, and they grabbed at me, and all I was was screaming and kicking and biting. One of them caught my heel, and my shoe peeled off as I hauled my leg back to kick again. And then there was all at once a sort of silence, a stillness that came over us like a blanket, like sleep. In my lungs the air felt freezing cold, the stars above were clear and untwinkling. And behind us all, That Monk cleared his throat.

"If you don't put the child down, turn and leave this camp, I will kill the lot of you." he said. His voice wasn't loud. There was no anger in it, though there was a sort of sleepy anticipation, and an absolute confidence. All the hairs on my arms went up, and I was shouting again, but this time at him, begging him not to do it. He'd been working a thousand years to balance his karma, if he killed these men--if he killed these men!

They dropped me roughly on my tailbone, drawing weapons, diving for That Monk. And for a moment I had double vision, there was his wrinkled, smiling self, all his dark rough clothing, and there was a man in his thirties, dark hair falling to his knees in a high tail, shining lacquered armor catching the light from the caravan fires. Drawn sword catching the light more sharply, blood red. He moved through the bandits like a flicker, or a swallow, some darting thing, like a child's kongzhu toy jumping from string to string. But everywhere he landed, a blade darted out, and someone fell.

It was over in moments. I'd barely had time to bring back the breath that had been knocked out of me when I was dropped. My heart was in my throat, and my eyes welled up, looking at the old-young king-monk who had saved me. "Stupid! What were you thinking! You were almost free!" I shouted at him, finding my feet and running to pummel him on the chest with useless fists. "My life is worthless! You should have let me die!"

He laughed under his breath, and fixed the tie in my loosened hair. "If I had done that, if I had let you die out of fear of soiling my karma, what would have happened to me then?" he asked me. "What weight would have been added to me, what shame? Killing them was a more moral choice than cowardice." I blinked and rubbed my eyes with dusty fingers. Behind him I saw men in armor, men with cheekbones like his, men with jewels at their throats and quiet approval on their rough or elegant faces. And behind them, someone else, someones, all bright, hair and eyes burning white as the Moon--

And then I woke up.

#foxwrites #fox writes #fox dreams #my actual life #my actual dreamlife

[lgcbk]

⸻ HOME.

He never understood the fascination with pears.

They were expensive. Bland. But they were his father's favorite, and for once that's something that mattered.

Something had come over him this year. Something that made him hop out of bed, shower, and put on clothes that not only passed the tried and true sniff test - but were freshly washed. Pressed ( Yes, everyone is shocked that he not only owns an iron but knows how to use one properly ). He even put on that tie his mother got him for his birthday one year. Sure, it was one of his father's old hand-me-downs. But it was good quality. Some brand he couldn't pronounce. Everyone at the company wears them, he was told. That counted for something.

Maybe she thought if he wore it long enough he'd finally get a job that required one. A uniform of a real profession. One that actually paid well. One they could brag about to all their friends at after work gatherings, company parties, award ceremonies... Unfortunately that was and never would be the case. But hey, if he was going to continue to be such a burden ( financial or otherwise ), the least he could do was make sure he didn't visit empty handed. So, pears.

His third attempt at entering the door's passcode has his thumb puncturing a hole through the plastic protecting the case of fruit, cursing under his breath as he fishes his phone out of the back pocket of his slacks. He imagined his father was still spending most of the holiday holed up in his home office, while his mother ignored the grumbling in the hall from the couch, glass of wine in hand.

He tries her cell first, brows furrowing when she doesn't answer on the second ring ( one ring to cover her shock at the sight of his contact name, the second to ponder whether she was willing to answer or not ). His tries his father's personal phone next, his relief outweighing the confusion at the sound of his mother's voice. 'Your father's on a conference call, what is it?'

"You didn't answer."

'My phone is charging.'

"Right... I'm outside."

'Outside?'

"Yeah. Code's not working. You changed it again?"

His mother's quiet swear mimics his own and he's certain she's pinching the bridge of her nose. 'Your grandfather. He made two visits last month. That's your father's doing.'

"He knows he's just going to guess it again, right? What's the point... Oh, did you give him my gift? The jersey? His birthday was last w - "

'That's what that was for? It's probably in your room with the rest of the boxes. We haven't had time to sort out everything just yet... But, can you come another time? We're not home right now.'

No, shi - "I know. I was just - I thought that - ...I can come back later. When will you be - ?"

'We're at the airport, Byeongkwan.'

"Airport?" he repeats, quirking a brow as he turns to lean against the doorframe. "I didn't know you went on a trip... Well, I have three days off, I can just come back tomorrow if you need a day to unp -"

'No. We just got to the airport. We're leaving in an hour. For the expansion? Don't you remember? We're going to be in Prague for two weeks.'

"What? Prague? Like... Like Europe?! Why - But it's Ch - " They don't care. He knows they don't care. He shouldn't have cared either.

'...We didn't think you'd be coming home.'

"I didn't either."

A placid silence settles between them. His mother doesn't know what else to say, but she never does. And Byeongkwan doesn't want to start a fight. He doesn't want to hear how he's so inconsiderate for forgetting such an important milestone for his father - again. How he should've called weeks ago to congratulate him on the promotion that got him his fancy trip in the first place. 'Ah, he's coming back now. I'll ask for the code and y -'

"Enjoy your trip."

He was sitting on the ground now, watching his phone slide across the hall to rest against against a neighbor's door. He could hear the family inside. If he remembered correctly there were four that resided there. Mom, dad, older brother, younger brother. The eldest wanted to be a rapper like him. Used to think he was cool. He wonders how they were spending the holiday. He wonders if their father liked pears, too.

He tears into the package, destroys the decorative wrapping, and takes a bite of one. Expensive. Bland. And a little brown on one side.

He never understood his father's fascination with pears.

He always fucking hated them.

#( solo. ) #lgc:familycon2k23 #( don't worry the silly goofy mood will be back soon ) #( inthequeue. )

[goddamnshinyrock]

an important moment in the life of any child is the day they learn about spontaneous hay combustion

#that linseed oil post made me nostalgic #I remember when my mother told me about this and was like 'your grandfather's neighbors had their barn burn down' #and it was the most mindblowing thing #fire! from nothing! #my parents' neighbors had a barn fire a few years back but iirc that was for a BORING reason #like improperly stored gas. YAWN. #la vie agricole #inane personal post

[astralflower-writes]

always have been

♡ pairing: jackson avery x female! reader

♡ genre: fluff

♡ warnings: none; vv small season 9 spoilers ahead

♡ check out the grey's anatomy masterlist here

♡ a/n: this is my first ever grey's anatomy fic made. hope all you will have fun reading!!

♡ a/n: i moved accounts so im posting it again here

you've always have been the youngest in your class. you've always been the youngest in your family. and the fact that you are an only child does not give an advantage for you.

born and raised in boston. you were neighbors with jackson avery, who put pinecones in your hair when you were little kids.

you were a helpless little baby in jackson's eyes back then. you were always his target with his pranking, as you were a tad younger than him.

it was all fun and games for him not until you've learned the beauty of taking revenge. which then change of being a team of entertaining yourselves whenever his mom or your family goes to a gala. and you've always been by his side.

"hey y/n wouldn't it be fun if we unplugged those speakers?" he asked you whilst looking for the main plug. "it could be. or not." you replied munching on the chocolate pretzels you got from the buffet table.

"oh come on. you're such a sissy." he snickered.

you knew better. growing up beside him from the beginning, it was his one of many ways of getting you on board.

"you're grandpa would flip." you said chuckling as you pointed that his grandfather looked over the two of you as if knowing that the both of you were up to no good.

days, months and years passed. you skipped a few grades and you were about to start highschool with jackson. thank the heavens that you'd have jackson with you in highschool.

but with your mother telling you that she's sending you to her home country for you to continue studying, your plans with jackson was in shambles.

jackson even tried to convince his mom for him to come along with you. but no to avail, his mother's words were. "no. you're an avery. you have duties here."

so with you going away, jackson tried to hide in the trunk of your car when it was the day of your flight.

"you promise to write." he reached out his pinky and made you promise. "aunt catherine already has my address." you smiled at him.

your mother sending you to her home country actually had a great advantage for you. because within those years, you've managed to finish medicine within six years.

yes. six. you didn't even think those programs exist.

so, now, after 10 years of being away. you're finally back.

your mother sent you to seattle to meet you there about an opening for a pediatric surgeon.

"mom? what are you doing here?" jackson said as he approached her with an embrace.

"jackson. you remember your aunt rose." catherine said and he greeted your mother with a smile.

"look at you! no wonder y/n can't stop talking about you." your mother said as jackson leaned into her embrace. "yeah... uh, how's y/n?" he asked trying to make small talk.

"oh she's fine. she's coming here actually." your mother replied.

"she's back?" jackson was taken aback about you being back after years of being away. "can you wait for her by the lobby and show her around, dear?" his mother asked.

"her mother and i have something important to discuss." she added while giving jackson a knowing look.

you were heading to grey-sloan memorial where your mother told you to meet her.

mom: sweetheart ask the nurses to page jackson when you arrive

you almost tripped on your foot when you read your mother's text.

you: jackson? jackson avery? why?

mom: he works there. your aunt catherine said he'll show you around ;)

you: when did you learn to use those?

you've finally arrived. you trudged yourself up to the main lobby and asked the nurse to page jackson.

you waited a few minutes and heard someone spoke. "someone paged me?"

you turned around and revealed jackson. "you got tall." you suddenly spoke.

"y/n!" he did not know what gotten him but he embraced you tightly.

"you... you're still short." he retorted sporting that sneaky grin he had since you were little kids.

"still mean, i see." you laughed as he lead you away from the busy lobby. "so... how are you?" he started.

"oh... that, im fine. you?"

"kind of. and not to brag, i kind of run this place." he said whispering to you. "really? you're serious?" stopping and looking at him checking if his really serious.

he just smiled. "no! you are serious!" you laughed at his antics trying to prove he is serious. "never thought that jackson, who stuck pinecones on my head will run a hospital." you spoke as the both of you walk in the corridors.

"what about you? mother mentioned you've mentioned you finished medicine in six years."

"i-i did." you spoke quietly.

"that's crazy." he said while the both of you were waiting for the elevator.

"that's why you've been busy huh." he said as the both of you were inside the elevator. "yeah... kind of."

"is this about we promised to write letters?" you spoke up.

jackson looked at you surprised that somehow you knew what he was thinking about. "well, i did write you letters." you spoke up.

getting off the elevator he led you to a conference room where both of your mothers were.

"can we talk more later, maybe? come over for dinner?" he asked you shyly.

"that would be great." you said with a smile before you went inside.

as what the both of you planned. you went over to jackson's place to catch up more.

he let you set your things by the living room, which was set up like how you hang out when you were younger.

"you've got a nice place." you said looking around.

"hey. uh--i got something for you." you said reaching over the small bag you brought. "you never stopped sending letters. and i did." you started.

giving him the bag you held, he looked inside. "i-i replied to every letter you sent. i just uh, i didn't send one back."

he looked at you with those same eyes you fell for years ago.

"god y/n i was about to get mad at you." he said jokingly as he captured you into another one of his warm embrace.

"i know. mom always bothered me to send you back letters." you chuckled in his chest.

"did you know how much i missed you? and god knows how much i love you." he said squeezing you tighter.

"yo-you love me?" you asked getting out of his embrace trying your best to hide your smile. "ye-yeah i do." he said as a hint of blush started to form in his cheeks.

"well, i always have been in love with you" you replied.

"are you staying for good?" he asked you. you smiled at him.

"yeah. only if you hire me." you spoke. "then you're hired dr. y/l/n." jackson spoke as he placed his lips on yours.

#grey's anatomy #grey's anatomy imagines #grey's anatomy x reader #greys anatomy imagines #greys anatomy x reader #jackson avery imagines #jackson avery x reader #jackson avery #astralflower-writes

[flowerwrites06]

summer drops — myg

Plot: Two old college flames reunite after ten years. 

Pairing(s): Yoongi x OC 

Rating: G | PG | M | R 18+

Type: Drabble | Oneshot | Two Parter | Series

Word Count: 2.7k 

Genre: Exes to Lovers | Angst | Smut

Tags & Warnings: bad breakup mention, heartbreak, explicit smut 

Authors Note: this was a story I wrote for an event but i ended being too late for the due date so here’s my little summer story. Hope you enjoy!!

Kiku sits at the pier, catching the last rays of sunlight before the summer night fell upon them. Ten years it had been since she was able to sit and breathe. It took a grandparents’ death and hours of convincing her managers to get to this point but she was here. Inhaling the fresh sea breeze and trying to forget about the aches.

Yoongi didn’t make any noise when he sat next to her. Simply sighed. It was ten years since they stood this close together too.

Kiku wanted to be surprised but seeing the sun bleed into the sea made her almost numb. “Where’s your wife?” she asked.

He scoffed. “Divorced a few months after marriage.”

“Wow,” she said. “And all that gushing you did about her too.”

“Go easy on me.” His voice rasped like he’d begun smoking again. “I didn’t she was fucking her neighbor.”

“I told you she had a crush on her neighbor.”

He chuckled. “I guess I’ll let you have that.” He dug his pale hands into his jacket pockets and pulled out a box of cigarettes. So he was smoking again. Lighting it up, Yoongi took his sweet time to take a puff and steam the air before speaking. “What about you? Hak says you got a little married too.”

Kiku was used to the smell of smoke from sitting around producers in windowless studios. Though her nose still twitched like muscle memory when seeing him smoke. “You mean engaged?”

“Whatever.” He spoke through his cigarette.

“Got cold feet. Wanted to see the world. When I got richer than him, he came crawling back though.” Kiku smirked.

“You’re rich now?”

“Little bit.” She shrugged. “It’s comfortable. I get to buy the fancy ramen packs anytime I want.”

Yoongi gave a crooked smirk. “Living the high life.”

She chuckled. Darkness enveloped above them as they sat in silence, watching the lights of the town return their vision of the blackened sea.

Yoongi then sighed, another waft of smoke. “Sorry about your grandfather.”

“Hundred and two is probably as good as it gets to a full life.” Kiku wanted to make a comment about Yoongis’ lifespan but she digressed. It wasn’t her job anymore.

“You wanna get some ice-cream?” He asked. “I heard Mintus is still open.”

Kiku had no intention of rekindling with Yoongi. She should’ve said no, went to her hotel, slept and flown back home without looking back at this place. Yet once again her muscle memory kicked in as it always did with him. “Sure.”

-

They went to the ice-cream shop, Mintus. It was a small walk away from the pier like everything was and the building made more sounds than the people did. Today wasn’t even a windy day but the dark wood cracked, metal squeezed and even the glass sang. Kiku felt strange at the familiarity.

Once they entered, two young girls were at the counter. Kiku remembered when the girls were toddlers outrunning their mothers the last time she was here. Their cheeks were red and glowing from the long summer day and half of the ice creams containers had only bits left over.

“Hazelnut cream, two scoops and a mocha swirl, two scoops.” Yoongi ordered.

Kiku paid and Yoongi didn’t insist. She was glad for that at least; he never wasted time. A picture of her was on the wall in Mintus. There was softness to her skin and a brightness to her eyes; even her posture was better than it was now. Kiku loved and hated that picture.

“Famous too,” Yoongi remarked.

“My mum had it put up.” She shook her head and tried not to look at it.

“So any kids?” Yoongi asked as they sat at their booth.

“Do I look like I have kids?”

Yoongi examined her. “Little exhausted and chubby, yeah.”

“Chubby?”

“Yeah…it’s cute.”

Kiku shook her head. “You don’t look like such a superstar either.”

“I did peak in college. Straight A’s, good friends, beautiful girlfriend, healthy family ties all of that. Now I’m divorced, family barely speaks to me and I’m addicted to nicotine.” Yoongi chuckled. “How’s your downfall going?”

“Well unlike you, I didn’t get straight A’s, I had one good friend who had to move and parents were off on business trips. And my beloved boyfriend only dated me to make the love of his life jealous.”

“Did I actually say love of my life?” Yoongi winced.

“Mhm. Very passionately too, I might add. I think you may have forgotten who you were talking to.” She chuckled under her breath.

“You’re not still upset about it, are you?”

“Yes, I’m secretly here to kill you for breaking my wittle college girl heart.”

Yoongi laughed as he stabbed his ice-cream more than eat it.

“I did hate you for a long time though,” Kiku admitted. There was no point in hiding old feelings of youth now. The girl in that stupid picture would’ve cried at the memory resurface but not her.

“Can I confess something?”

Kiku hummed.

“After my divorce with Gunmi, I may…or may not have come to contact you.” Yoongi took a generous bite of the ice-cream.

Kiku froze. “What?”

“Yeah, I wanted to see if you’d give me another chance.” He shrugged.

“Only a few months after.” Kiku clicked her teeth. “I’d have kicked you in the nuts.”

Yoongi smirked. “I probably would’ve deserved it.”

“Probably?”

“Definitely.” He chuckled.

-

Night arrived. Hail kept slamming on the windows. Kiku should’ve gone back to her hotel but instead she was in Yoongis’ old flat. Apparently he never got the chance to sell it so they took shelter here until the hail calmed. Her hair and clothes drenched from the previous rain so she took a shower and wore some spare clothes from her bag.

Yoongi only took his shirt off, dabbed the rain off his skin and proceeded to light cigarette as he sat on the floor. His back rested on the couch and his head was thrown back.

Kiku sat next to him and watched the violent hail crashed through the glass, threatening to break it but always failing. “What would you have said if you did manage to contact me then?”

Yoongi blew the plume of steam up to the air. His skin glistening and glowing from the humid created in the old flat. “I’ve no clue. I mean apologize for one thing. I guess I would’ve just asked you to give me another chance.” He turned his head. “Would you have?”

“It was a bad break-up, Yoongi.” Kiku smiled. “A couple of months wasn’t going to heal that.”

“I would’ve waited.”

“Until I wanted you back or until Gunmi got to her senses.”

“You know what I mean.” Yoongis’ eyelids grew heavy. He shifted close until he could feel heat radiating from her mixed with the scent of pear. He pressed his lips against hers. Not quite a kiss but just a gentle touch. Then he moved, kissing her bottom lip then her upper.

Kiku assumed it was an impulse. Fire seared through her belly and heart, reigniting feelings that she had long suppressed to move forward. She wanted to keep going. They could’ve kept going. No one was going to stop them. But her sense began to swell.

Immediately Kiku pulled away.

“What’s wrong?” He whispered.

“We can’t do this again.” Kiku stood up, folding her arms over her chest. Somehow doing it helped her believe that he wouldn’t be let in again.

“Why not?”

“I spent two years trying to get over you.” She looked over her shoulder. “I’m not going down that hole again.”

Yoongi placed the cigarette onto his ashtray. “It’s not gonna be the same like last time.”

“How can you be sure? You said last time that you were over her.” Her heart clenched.

“That was college, I was an idiot.” Yoongi let out a breathy laugh in the midst of tension. “If I knew what she was like, I’d never have chosen her over you.”

“So if she came back now and promised she wants to work things out, you’d choose her over me.”

“No, she cheated on me.” He stammered before letting out a defeated sigh. “Just…forget the damn kiss.” His back stumped against the couch. In a twist of detaching himself, Yoongi brought the cigarette back to his lips. The same non-chalant behaviour he liked to have to avoid arguments. “I thought we were reconnecting.”

Tears burned in her eyes, old hurts and wound reopening until they oozed through the blood in the her veins. “You know you never said sorry. Not once.” Her voice cracked. “You had every reason in the book to do all that to me and in none of that time—the whole thing just meant so little to you.” Kiku saw Yoongi turned to meet her gaze. “So forgive me if I’m not jumping in your arms like a lovesick princess.”

Yoongis’ eyes softened. She was right. He never gave her any reason. Those dark eyes were glimmering with love and hope for someone else as he slowly ripped every fabric of Kikus’ heart. Only for him to try and rip at the healed seams again.

Not if she could help it. Putting a stone back in her heart, she stomped to the bedroom. She put on the rest of her clothes and walked out of the apartment. There wasn’t a single glance shared before the door slammed close.

-

The next day, Kiku packed up to go back to the city. She made her distant farewells with her family, kissed her grandfathers’ grave and now it was back in those windowless studios for the rest of the year. For the first time in a decade, Kiku missed it. Better than the old tension swirling here.

A knock rapped on the door. “Hey, it’s me.” Yoongis’ voice chimed.

“What do you want?” Words cut through the wood.

“A…peace offering. I heard you were flying back. Let me give you a lift.”

“I’m fine.”

“Kiku, you know the transport service here is shit. Please?”

Kiku sighed. She wanted to keep her guard high up that Yoongi wouldn’t be able to reach. Then there was also that morbid memory of sitting in the twenty year old bus, rattling and filled with unknown hitchhikers or travelers who wanted to disappear. This town was in the middle of nowhere. “Whatever.”

When she opened the door, Kiku simply walked past him. The waft of cigarettes was thick in his aura. “That doesn’t mean I’m talking to you.”

Kiku and Yoongi drove in silence for the most part. Yoongi lit up a new cigarette during a red light, rolled the window down and let his hand hang loose. A thin trail of smoke followed alongside the car.

“Do you have to smoke all the time?” Kiku asked.

“I thought you weren’t talking to me,” Yoongi said.

Defiant, Kiku pressed her lips together and looked out the window. Past their small town, there was really nothing but nature and the distant sea until they reached the air strip. The sun was gold against the deep blue of the water, the grass and leaves were glistening green. Sweat gathered on Kikus’ skin as she waved her hand-held fan to give her cool air.

During one of the bends, Yoongi drove to the side of the road and came to an abrupt halt.

“What’s wrong?” Kikus’ brows furrowed.

Yoongis’ grip on the steering wheel was vice-like, whitening his knuckles and making his wrist tremble.

She tilted her head. “Yoongi?”

“Three days. For the first three days, yeah…I did only want to make Gunmi jealous.” Yoongi spoke through gritted teeth. It was taking every ounce of his courage and willpower to bring that confession. “But the rest of it? Those two years, they meant a lot to me. I just—I lost my willpower when she came up to me and I didn’t want to cheat on you so I thought—breaking it off was the best option.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me that then? Why’d you have to—” Kiku tried not to grimace. “—gush about her like that?”

“I don’t know. I guess I was breaking off a serious relationship, I wanted to—lay out my case or something.” Yoongi shook his head, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he yanked his seatbelt off. “When Gunmi cheated on me, all I could think about was you. The entire time she was desperately trying to explain, I thought to myself—I could’ve just been secretly watching you write some lyrics while I pretended to nap. Instead of dealing with this shit that I was trying to avoid with you.”

Yoongi stammered and fell around his crowd of words before sighing in defeat. “I’m sorry. I know, it’s coming way too late but I am sorry. Breaking it off with you was—” he flicked his hand. “—it was one of the worst mistakes I made. And I’ve made some award winning ones.” He scoffed.

Kiku felt her cheeks grow hotter from his words than the beaming sun could accomplish. “It’s not that late.” She attempted a smile.

“You’re gonna leave soon,” he scoffed. “How can we promise that we’ll see each other?”

“I guess we can’t.” Kiku shook her head, her hair stuck to the slick of her shoulders.

Even with this statement, Yoongi didn’t start the car and drive away. Instead he reached his hand out and cupped her cheek.

Kiku leaned against his warm palm, the faint scent of his cologne wafted from his wrist. Perhaps there was no need to confirm nor deny their relationship. Maybe it was the familiar sea air of their old home that brought back old feelings and if they went back to their lives, it would all fade away. Whatever the reason was, she felt herself drowning in those old feelings.

She shifted forward and kissed him. The fresh remnants of tobacco was thick on his lips but they synced with her movements with a genteel. His palm gripped at the back of her hair, desperate to prolong the kiss that was previously interrupted that hail swollen night.

Kiku climbed onto the drivers’ seat, straddling Yoongi as he threw the cigarette out of the window. In the flurry of their summer heat and the salty air flowing through the open windows of the car, their hands frantically ripped at each cloth sticking to their sweaty skin.

Metallic snap of his buttons, Kiku wrapped her hands at the base of his member. Yoongi pulled at her panties until the seams ripped, warm and dripping nectar onto the fabric of his pants. She lifted herself, his lips latched onto the length of his throat as she sunk herself into his length.

Sweat slick on their skin, drenched clothes barely clung onto their body. She bounced on his lap, Yoongis’ nails dug into her bottom. Wetness stuck her hair on her temples, moaning in the delirious heat, her puffy walls hugged him with glee. He watched her in awe, missing the familiar touch. He lovingly kissed her cheek and chin, growing mad with desire from the sound of her squelching with every thrust.

He turned them around, the windows fogged and the leather glistened. He raised her legs up, slid two fingers into her core. Lips suckled on her clit as she gripped on his wet hair. Speeding up his pace, he drilled until she felt her orgasm reach the edge. A small cry of pleasure squeaked out of her throat.

“Please,” she whispered desperately as the knot in her belly threatened to tear.

“Please, what?” Yoongis’ voice was drunk and drowning in ecstasy. “You want more?”

“Fuck me.” Kiku tugged at his shoulder, almost like a demand in the midst of her clouded mind and leaking want.

Yoongi smirked and hovered back over her, stuffing himself inside her and leaving no time before his pace became merciless. Years of only reminiscing and imagining what could have been swelled into those desires coming to life finally. His kisses were heavy, lifting one of her legs over his shoulder so he could be closer and sink deeper.

The swelling burst like thick sweetness inside of her. His fingers prolonged her pleasure, pressing and rubbing until the knot finally ripped at the seams, joining and melting with him as their chests fluttered together.

After cleaning themselves, Kiku and Yoongi sat close on the drivers’ seat as he blasted the air-conditioner and caught their breathing.

“My flight is in twenty minutes,” said Kiku as she looked at the car clock.

“We can take a little nap first,” said Yoongi.

“A nap?”

“Yeah…maybe twenty minutes?”

Kiku chuckled, lightly smacking his bare chest as Yoongi brushed his fingers down her arm. “Fine. A twenty minute nap.”

❁

#yoongi #thebtswritersclub #yoongi fanfic #bts fanfic #yoongi imagines #bts imagines #bts fanfiction #yoongi fanfiction #exes to lovers au #yoongi au #aged up yoongi #yoongi x oc

[rosemary-writes]

I can’t, I’m so sorry

(David x Female!Reader)

AN: this story is basically me just ranting about my experience over the past two weeks. It’s very hard going through the grief process and I wanted to share my experience through my writing. This story is kind of a self insert but I still like it

Warnings: swearing, mentions of death, losing a loved one, grief, mourning, crying, unhealthy habits, recollection of memories, soft!David, maybe out of character David, general sadness, mentions of a cemetery, vampire powers.

Word count: 3.8k

DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE TO ANY OF THE ABOVE WARNINGS

“I like to pretend that you ran away, that you’re living on an island and have a garden and a dog and that your brothers drop by to bring you groceries and books and that you are very happy and free.” - S.C. Pacheco

It happened so quickly. No one saw it coming, but then again, does anyone ever really see death coming?

You were preparing for finals. It was the last two weeks of your first year at college and you had been studying non stop. You were going to end this year with a bang and have a great extended summer without worry in your head.

Then, the phone call happened. It was so unexpected. Dad called and asked if you were alone. Thankfully, your psychology class was on a five minute break and you were out in the hallway. Dad immediately said that he didn’t know how to break it to you gently so he was just going to say it. Following his statement, he told you how your great grandmother had a stroke and she had about a day to a month to live. The hallway stood still and the chatter of classrooms ceased into nothing.

Tears had welled up in your eyes and began to flow down your face. Nothing stopped them as your dad kept telling you about everything that happened. Your grandparents, uncles, aunts, and even your mom went to the hospital to see her. It was a two hour drive. Your dad had said that your mother was going to bring you home when all of your classes were done, for the day, so you could be in an area of comfort. The only reason he said that was because the history of your mental health wasn't the best at all. The previous two weeks were spent being in bed because the stress of school began to weigh heavily in your chest.

The weight in your chest had lessened over the past few days but the news of your great grandmother brought it back. Your face was red as the tears kept flowing from your eyes. Dad said he loved you before letting you hang up. Your whimpers and scattered breathing echoed in the hallway. Hot tears dripped from your chin and onto your sweater as you ran into the bathroom. Thankfully it was empty and you were able to let out your cries. The yellow lights flickered as you fell to your knees. She was your only great grandmother and she loved you greatly. Everyone told you that you were special because you were her eldest great granddaughter. The passing quote in your head practically made you scream out in confusion and upset.

Many minutes passed before your psychology teacher burst into the bathroom. She found you on the floor, face wet with tears. Immediately she came to your side and began shushing you while wrapping her arms around you. The only words you could cry out were “She’s dying and I’m not there.” After that, the day fuzzed into nothing. Your close friend had to come and get you for your other classes. She told your teachers how you were leaving early in the week because your great grandmother was dying. Thankfully, your teachers understood and gave you extensions on every assignment that was late.

Later in the evening, your mother came to get you. The car ride was very quiet and so was the weekend. It was spent with you occasionally crying while listening to your family plan her funeral. It was also spent with you remembering your childhood in her house.

The smells and sounds lingered in your mind constantly. Sometimes you’d hear the ghost of her grandfather clock when you couldn’t sleep.

Sadly, you couldn’t sleep most days. A week came and went and you were in the start of your finals week. It was three days filled with exams. Tuesday was the first day of exams. Thankfully, there was only one exam. When class was over, your teacher asked to speak with you. She gave you an enormous hug and told you that you passed her class. With tears forming in your eyes she told you that your great grandmother would be very proud. After that, she wished you the best in life and you went back to your dorm with your close friend.

As if on cue, your phone rang. When you picked it up you immediately could tell it was your dad. He told you that your great grandmother passed in her sleep early that morning. You knew this news was coming but no amount of preparation could prepare you to hear that. Tears fell from your eyes as he told you to get through the next few days before moving out and coming home. You both said, “I love you.” before hanging up.

Later that night, you cried until the sun gently arose over the tall evergreen trees. The next few days were spent in a daze. Your friends comforted you and told you that they’d always be there for you as you cried and wanted to go home. You took your exams and packed up your room and left the college. You were so happy to leave with your mother and go home for the summer. However, the shadow of grief clung to your skirt the entire time, even as the evening turned into night and then stretched into morning.

With sad eyes, you had looked into the mirror as you applied your makeup and got dressed for her funeral. The dress you wore was long sleeved and it just about touched the ground. You sighed. It was going to be a long drive through the flat farmland to get to the town of your childhood. When your family got to the old cemetery, your father told you that it was a beautiful day for her to be laid to rest.

And it was. It really was. The sun was shining, there were no clouds, and the gentle breeze turned your warm tears cold. Birds and butterflies fluttered around the graves and danced with each other. Even as the priest recited the carefully picked words, you thought of how it was a beautiful day. When he was done speaking, your mother held you as you cried. She let go when she began to cry uncontrollably. Your younger cousins came to your side and wept with you as you walked amongst your sleeping ancestors and extended family.

At the end of the funeral, you tearfully kissed her headstone goodbye and whispered to your great grandfather that you know they're happy now, laying side by side. When you got into the car to go back to Santa Carla, you cried until you dozed off under the warm afternoon sun.

Before you had left for the whole ordeal, you called David and told him about everything that had happened. He knew that your great grandmother had a stroke and that your whole family was stricken with grief. He also knew that you had never experienced grief or the process of mourning. So, he made a promise that when you came back he would stay by your side. You gave a huff into the payphone as he told you that he would do anything to ease the process. Before hanging up, you asked if it would be okay if you could stay at the cave for a couple of days. He told you yes and that he loved you before hanging up.

When your family finally got back to the house, you immediately fled to your room. Your parents didn’t want to bother you so they left you alone. They didn’t know that you were going to spend a few days at the cave. Infact, they didn’t know you were dating David. Your parents just thought he was a college friend.

Grabbing a bag, you began shoving clothes into it. You grabbed a few necessities and put those in there as well. When you figured you had everything, you heard David's bike outside. However, before you left, you noticed your great grandmother's ring on your dresser. It was given to you on your sixteenth birthday. It was an heirloom that was passed down from your great grandmother. When she first saw you wearing it, she had complimented how you reminded her of her younger self. While looking at the ring, your hand flew to the pearl choker that was resting around your neck. They were hers as well.

You grabbed the ring and slipped it on your ring finger before leaving. Your parents must’ve gone to bed because the house was dark and their bedroom door was shut. In the kitchen, you pulled out a notepad and wrote down that you were going to be with friends for a few days.

You left your house and noticed David was at the end of your driveway. He had a cigarette in his mouth and he was looking at your neighbors house.

“David.” you called gently. His head whipped towards you and a smirk appeared on his lips. His fingers came up and took the cigarette from his lips. When you walked to him, he gently pulled you close and gave you a quick kiss. When you pulled away, his hand came up to your cheek. You looked up at him in the moonlight and could see that his face was laced with concern as his eyes studied your face.

“Hop on kitten, let’s go to the cave.” he said, as his hand fell from your face. You got on behind him and when you wrapped your arms around him he began to drive through the night. Usually, you would be happy and laughing with David as he drove erratically to get you excited. He loved hearing you shout as he would go over hills but tonight was quiet. Of course he knew why. You were grieving and he wasn’t expecting you to do any of that. When you asked to stay at the cave, he was honestly surprised.

However, part of you felt like you needed to shout and laugh. You had mentally prepared for her death for a week and now it was hours after the funeral. Part of you begged to be left alone with your ever changing mind and the other part wanted to be with David in his arms as you two laughed and talked trash about the people of Santa Carla.

Instead, your face was resting against his back as he drove to the cave. The night was clear and the moon was bright. In the serenity of the night you closed your eyes. Your eyes were irritated at how much you had been crying and you hoped that tonight David wouldn’t see you cry. He had never seen you cry and you wanted to keep it that way. You always stayed happy and energetic around him. Sometimes you could hear David whisper that he loved your spark when he thought you were asleep. He didn’t know that your great grandmother repeated the same thing many years ago.

You sighed as you felt David’s bike slow to a stop. Opening your eyes, you saw that the both of you were at one of the entrances to the cave. He parked his bike next to the three others and turned it off. Carefully, you unwrapped your arms from him as he got off. As you got off, David offered his hand and you took it. When you stood next to him, hand in hand, he kissed your forehead. You smiled at the affection and he led you down into the cave.

“I know you won’t mind but, me and the guys are going to go feed when you get inside. I’ll change my clothes before coming back” David said, as he led you through the tunnel. You hummed and looked ahead at the gentle glowing light ahead. In the main area of the cave you could hear the noises of the other boys. David’s grip on your hand tightened as you came to the steep slope that led to the main area. The first time he brought you here, you slipped going down. You smiled at the cherished memory as you carefully walked down. Thankfully, this time you made it to the bottom.

“Hey David, hey Scoob” Marko said, looking up as you and David walked into the main area of the cave. You scoffed as David let go of your hand.

“How many times do I have to tell you to not call me that?” you asked, as David walked over towards the others. Marko gave you a teasing smile as Paul came from god knows where. Dwayne followed after him and the two joined the others.

“Anyways, I think you guys should get a move on. I can tell you’re antsy.” you said. David was breathing a bit more heavily than usual and you knew that was his body telling him to eat. Without word, the boys turned and walked away to one of the many exits. As the others ascended into the night, David turned to look at you. It was his way of saying goodbye but you also knew he was asking a question.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.” you said, grabbing your bag. Without speaking, he too turned away and followed the others.

You sighed as you watched him leave. It wasn’t your first time alone in the cave. Sometimes, they would go out and feed while you slept and you’d wake up in an empty nest. But, right now, you needed to be alone to just breathe. So, you went down one of the hallways to your little sanctuary. Months ago, you found a little safe haven in the depths of the cave. It was your little room and it was filled with things you found and liked. As you walked down the dim path, you could see the curtains in the doorway. Carefully, when you stood in front of them, you pushed them aside and stepped into the little safe haven. It was dark, but thankfully you had candles in different places around the room. Setting your stuff down on the bed, you grabbed your lighter from your dress pocket. You carefully lit the candles and adjusted them to keep from scorching other objects.

When you were finished you plopped down onto the mattress that was covered in blankets and pillows. You didn’t know how long it had been since you last slept. The nights were spent with you crying until you couldn’t but by morning, you were ready to repeat the whole cycle.

It sucked. Grief wasn’t supposed to be like this. Many people told you that after a few days, everything would go back to normal. Well, you wanted the feeling to go away immediately. You hated this neverending feeling of sadness. It was like a child clinging to their mother’s skirt.

One of the worst parts of it all was the day going through your head. You couldn’t stop thinking about her funeral. Was this normal? To constantly think of the funeral? Was it also normal to cry so much? You just couldn’t understand the whole grief process at all.

Gently, you got up from the mattress and walked over to the old mirror that David found for you. The candles in the room gave your features a warm glow in the mirror. You looked at your face and how it changed. You looked different. The shadows under your eyes had darkened and your eyes looked irritated. Glancing down to the pearl choker, you felt your throat tighten. The words of the past week began to echo loudly in your head.

She wouldn’t want you to fuss over her.

Even the brightest stars have to dim.

She loved you. She loved you greatly.

Then the tears came. They came so fast that you were honestly scared by them. They fell down your face as a sob escaped your mouth.

It wasn’t fair. None of it was. The pain in your body felt amplified as you sank to the floor. The worst part of it all was you couldn’t stop thinking of her. The way she kissed your cheeks when she saw you and when you left. The way her hands gently ran through your hair as you slept in her lap as a child. How she would sneakily give you chocolates after Christmas dinner and not tell anyone. Her mischievous smile flashed in your mind and it only made you cry harder. Why, why, why? Why did she have to die?

______

From the entrance of the cave, David stood still. Your sadness had reverberated through the cave like a loud radio. He couldn’t hear you but he felt the grief. Slowly, he walked to your room. He had forgotten how grief felt. It was a horrible feeling that he never wanted to experience again. However, he wanted to comfort you the best he could. As he got closer to your room, he could hear you. He heard the rapid beating of your heart as you let your emotions out. When he stood in front of the curtain, he hesitated. Would you want him in there?

David brushed the thought aside as he remembered that it was your first time with grief. He could practically smell the confusion and anger from your tears. Quickly, he opened the curtains and stepped into your room. On the farthest side of the room, you were leaning against the wall as you were trying to catch your breath. Your face was red and wet with tears. The eyeliner you wore was smudged around your eyes and David could see where it had trailed.

When you had calmed down just a little, David cleared his throat. Immediately, you turned around and met his still face. He held no emotion as he looked at your tragic form.

“Get out.” you said, quickly wiping your face. David did not move from his spot. Instead, he walked towards you.

“David, get out! I don’t want you to see me like this!” You yelled, as you turned away to shield yourself from him. He said nothing as he came behind you and wrapped his arms around you. It was so gentle that it almost didn’t seem like David. Again, you tried to say something else but it died on your lips. Instead a whimper came out as you fell to the floor and David gently fell with you. He kept your back pressed against his chest as you kept crying.

“I-I’m sorry.” you mumbled through your tears. David’s face nuzzled your neck as you wept uncontrollably.

“It’s okay. I’m right here.” he quietly said against your skin as you kept trying to steady your breathing. After a few minutes, you had calmed down enough but tears still kept falling down your face.

David listened as your heartbeat kept getting calmer by the minute. It was a soothing sound to him.

“Are you okay?” he asked, looking at your face. You scoffed, “No, but I’ll live.” you mumbled quietly. David hummed at your response.

“David, I hate this.” you stated with a sniffle. He perked up at your words and listened carefully.

“I hate everything about grief, I hate the confusion, I hate the sleepless nights, I hate the crying and I-” you cut off the sentence as you tried to not go into another crying fit. Taking in a shaky breath, you continued, “And I hate that I don’t know what to do. This whole process fucking sucks.”

David sighed and kissed your cheek. “You’re still in the early stages of grief. It’s confusing and it’s scary to go through. Especially by yourself.” he explained calmly, “One of the best things you can do is try to think of all of the good things that happened in her life. I detest seeing you this way, but I know it’s something you have to go through.” he finished.

You sighed and wiped your face, “But, why does it have to hurt so damn bad?” you asked, turning to try and look at his face. David moved back so he could look you in the eye.

“It hurts because you lost someone you loved. Your mind can’t understand how life will be different without her. Eventually, you’ll understand how to live life like before and carry on again.” he replied, calmly.

His eyes fell to the pearl choker around your neck and his hands moved to take it off. You didn’t object to the feeling of his cold hands as they fumbled with the clasp. Carefully, he took it off and moved to set it somewhere else. “Lets move to the mattress, hm?” David suggested. You nodded and the two of you got up and went to lay down together on the mattress. Instead of laying next to you, David was sitting next to you.

You closed your eyes when your back hit the soft blankets. It was comforting but you didn’t want to sleep even though your body was begging for it. You were just scared of what you would dream of.

“Would you like me to take off your ring?” David asked, holding your hand up to his face. You quirked your eyebrow at him. “Why would I need to take off her ring?” you asked sitting up. David rolled his eyes, “You don’t want it to fall off while you sleep. It might get lost.” he said, meeting your gaze.

“Uh, it won’t get lost while I sleep because I’m not going to sleep.” you replied, moving your hand away from his.

David scoffed at your words, “Kitten, this isn’t up for debate. I know you haven’t slept in days and it’s not healthy for you.” he argued, moving his hands to your face.

“David, I don’t need you to tell me what to do.” You declared. He looked down at you. His eyes were serious and you could tell that he was getting annoyed with this conversation.

“You are going to sleep and I don’t care if you refuse. I’m going to do this anyways” he said, finally. Before you could answer, you slipped into a deep sleep. Your body fell back onto the mattress and David was satisfied. He didn’t like using his vampire powers on you but, he felt like this was necessary. He looked down at your hand and carefully pulled the ring off. David got up from the mattress and set the ring down next to the pearl choker. He looked down at your sleeping form and smirked before laying down next to you. Tonight, all would be well for a while.

#marko the lost boys #dwayne the lost boys #david the lost boys #paul the lost boys #the lost boys x reader #the lost boys imagines #the lost boys 1987 #David the lost boys x reader #david lost boys #rosemary writes

[hargrove-mayfields]

Day one of the Horror on Cherry Lane Challenge! I’ll be participating this month as a writer! The prompt for today is Knife!

warnings for mentions of suicidal ideation and attempts, death, child abuse, and blood.

Billy met Steve in the psych ward.

Well, they met officially at Tina’s party, but that wasn’t the real Steve. That was the King Steve. Deeper than that though, even the Steve Harrington everyone else saw even after the breakup and the fall from grace still wasn’t the real thing.

That was fake smiles, overdone nonchalance to cover up the wound from his fallen status. Now he was stripped down to himself, all bloody bandages and tired eyes, the boy he was pretending to be finally broken down to reveal this.

Apparently, Ruthie Harrington found her son with his grandfather's switchblade- all the other objects in the house sharper than a spoon and with less sentimental value had already been tossed -bleeding all over her freshly polished linoleum floors. She dropped him off at the hospital a night ago and nobody’s been by to see him since.

Now, it’s by pure coincidence that Billy’s already in on the same day Steve’s admitted.

He’s been locked up the past three days compared to Steve’s one. These small town hicks are jumpier (ha) than he thought, and don’t think doing the walk and turn test on the edge of the quarry after downing a bottle and a half of fireball is as funny as he does. Whatever. Cid would’ve thought that was badass as hell.

So he was admitted, on suicide watch for a stupid joke that wasn’t really worth it, or even really a joke. Max came to visit once. She punched him in the chest as hard as she could and cursed him out for an hour. She’d never done that before. By the time she left they were both in tears, and maybe Billy realized a thing or too about his carelessness. Realized for the first time that someone cared.

But he’s still in here for another week and a half by law, so. He’s not going to mope about it. And while Steve Harrington showing up is about the last thing he’s expecting, he decides that’s at least something he can work with. Definitely brings a little life to the place.

He waits until Steve’s intense watch period is over to bug him, once they’re out of their cramped little rooms for a couple of hours to “socialize” (see, the more sound of mind keep an eye on the other patients while the nurses take their smoke breaks) Billy goes straight to Steve. Him and Harrington are far from friends, but that’s pretty much irrelevant when the only other choices for company are kids younger than them too scared to approach them and people too deep in their midlife crises to bother with teenage drama.

Throwing himself down in the blue plastic chair across from where Steve settled in, Billy kicks his feet up on the table,, “What’s up Harrington? Didn’t expect to see a familiar face in here.”

But Steve, poor Steve, takes one look at Billy with those haunted brown eyes, and his face just falls completely apart. There are tears on his way too pale cheeks before Billy even has a chance to breathe.

The smile drops off of Billy’s face, “Jesus Harrington, I know m’not looking my best surviving on hospital food and cigarettes without a hairbrush, but that’s a little unwarranted.”

“Shut up. Not everything’s about you, Hargrove.”

“Oh I disagree with that. But I get the point. I’ll let ya be.” Billy hums, scooting his chair back and getting up. He stops when Steve starts to speak, “Y-You outta be careful saying that kinda stuff in here.”

“What?”

“That the world revolves around you. They’ll come up with a diagnosis for that and keep you here forever. Drug you ‘til you forget your own name, let alone your status.” Steve tells him with humor, wiping the tears off his face.

Billy nods in understanding, sits back down with an interested smirk, “This ain’t your first time here, is it?”

“Is it yours?”

“Nah. I’ve done some shit on purpose, some on accident. Once it wasn’t even me. But s’never done anything to help so far.”

Steve puffs out a sigh, “Don’t I know it.. I’ve been in and outta this place since I was like, ten. Clearly nothing’s changed.”

“Why? What’s your dirty little secret, Harrington?”

“I cut myself, dumbass.” He deadpans, looking at Billy with a bluntness in his expression that reads more concerning, more like indifference to what he just said than matter-of-fact.

“No shit. But that ain’t the secret.” Billy probes further, can tell he’s getting under that mask Steve wears, “Why do you do it?”

“Legally, I can't tell you. And I don’t think I would anyways.”

“What about if I tell you all about me first? I got no reservations ‘cept the one that got me a bed here.”

“It’s not a hotel, Hargrove.”

“Eh, might as well be. Feels like the damn hotel California.”

“Is that why?”

“Huh? Oh no, I been pullin’ stunts like this long before we left Cali.”

“Like what?”

“Like downing two full bottles of my mother’s meds after she left. Not at the same time obviously, or I wouldn’t be here. Mostly ‘cause my dad didn’t even wanna take me to the hospital either time.” Billy doesn’t look at Steve while he elaborates. Not because he cares, he’s an open book, if a random old woman at the grocery store asked about his last attempt, he’d tell her.

But. He doesn’t like watching people’s faces. Seeing sympathy and concern there. It makes him feel all stupid and guilty. It’s usually not like that with other kids like him, but Steve’s different. He’s got a big heart. Even if there’s no room for himself.

And Billy hurt Steve before. He doesn’t want to see someone he caused pain caring so much about him. He already cracked when Max came to see him. This could be what splits him open, spills out all the things he’s covered up.

So he keeps going, “And like runnin’ out in front of traffic with my friends. They thought we were just playin’ chicken ‘til I stopped dead in front of a station wagon. Metal rims’d done me in for sure if one ‘a the older boys hadn’t pulled me outta the way. Damn near ripped my shirt in half how fast he grabbed me.”

“I’m guessing your parents are the reason why then?”

“Yessir.” Billy deflects, not good at getting deeper into it, “You wanna tell me yours then?”

“I started cutting because Tommy Hagan told me about it. He thought it was freaky, but when he ran his mouth about how they found the neighbor kid in his room, drained of all his blood from his wrists, I wanted to try it. I’ve tried liquor and drugs and all kinds ‘a shit I shouldn’t, but nothin’ stuck like cutting.” Steve pauses for a long time, his eyes going blank, staring right past Billy, “When my mom found out she.. she.. Forget it.”

“Hey, you seen my skeletons. Can’t I see yours?”

“No. I don’t wanna fucking talk about it anymore.” Steve answers, despite his assuredness, his tone wobbling with some unidentifiable emotion.

Talk about mood swings. Billy doesn’t get how nobody would’ve noticed something was up before Steve started carving into himself. Really, he knows someone would have seen it and just ignored it.

It only gets worse though, the reservedness turning to sadness and frustration. None of the words are coming out, but he can tell Steve’s thinking of the stories, reliving all that got him to the here and now. Billy can also tell there’s nothing he can do no to stop him from doomsdaying.

So when Steve is inevitably in the thralls of a panic attack, he tries to hug him tight, to try to get it to stop maybe, that always worked for him at least, but Steve swats him away. Judging from the way he winces, it’s not easy for him to do either, with those thick ass bandages constricting his wrists, but the tears and the pain on his face are buried behind his resolution.

He’s hiding something from Billy.

In hindsight, talking to a new patient about past attempts probably wasn’t his brightest idea anyways, so he switches the subject while Steve works on coming down from his panic attack. He brings up Max and her little nerds, trying to bridge the healthier connections between him and Steve that they’d both been ignoring since the fight. He mentions basketball too, another something they have in common other than trying to kill themselves.

It doesn’t really work, though Steve does stop shaking as bad, just curling up in his little chair and sniffling, pretending not to listen while Billy rambles on and on. But he doesn’t talk. It’s probably better for him not to anyway. Billy himself has been known to say some dumb shit when he’s in distress.

Ultimately, even once the conversation runs out, he stays with Steve until dark. He can tell from the way his gaze sticks to the floor that Steve recovered from his fit a while ago, but he’s embarrassed by having a breakdown in front of him, as if he isn’t in here for the same reason. It helps that he gets it though, and they sit in a comfortable, albeit very prolonged, silence.

Long after Steve gets xanned up and knocked out though, while Billy is still free to wander until the midnight curfew as a low risk patient, he decides to stick with him in his room. Billy’ll never admit it, but he gets nightmares, and he doesn’t want to face that just yet, so with a new friend as an excuse, he’s up half the night watching Steve sleep.

He remembers what happened earlier, how focused Steve was on keeping him away from him, despite his panic, and decides, with a glance at how deeply Steve is sleeping, his greasy hair all strewn about on stiff pillows, that he’s going to figure out what it was.

He snoops around in his bedside drawers, in the bathroom, in the locker in the corner. It’s there he notices the knitted jacket Steve was wearing before, hanging heavy to one side, like there’s something in its pocket. He touches it and feels the outline of something small, so he pulls it out.

He regrets checking though, because it’s a knife. Judging from the old looking engravings on its handle, and the coppery stains within the grooves, it’s specifically the very same one that got Steve hospitalized.

He shoves it in his own back pocket and keeps looking, with a quick glance at Steve, finding a note tucked where the knife had been. Written in perfect scrawl on bond paper that’s been folded a dozen times and stained with tears,

“Do it right next time, why don’t you? Your mother is too soft on you. I’m not paying for this again.

- J.Harrington.”

Billy doesn’t know what to do but throw the note in the trash. Not really in shock, but definitely more than a little fucked up from reading that, he sits on the end of Steve’s bed. His own dad, who'd more than once been the one putting him in the hospital, had never even said anything like that to him.

He didn’t get to talk to Steve much today, but they’ve got as long as Billy’s stuck in here together to fix that. Longer if he just pulls something in front of a nurse. And he wants to, really really wants to.

Because he knows he just met the real Steve, can recognize another broken boy when he sees one, and he knows too, that he never wants to meet a pretty boy like this again.

And if that’s his declaration to get clean, then so fucking be it.

But. He never promised not to hurt anyone. Ultimately he’d still need that outlet.

He keeps the knife. To make sure his pretty boy doesn’t get hurt again.

#CherryLaneChallenge #harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #ej writer #story by ej! #tw self harm #tw attempted suicide #tw blood #happy October! #I’m so excited! #I’m gonna try to do all of this but I’m real busy coming up! #im not sure what vibe I’m goin got in this challenge #but I think it’s mostly haunting? #not scary but like that oh moment y’know

[lovesanmotion]

Answer - Jeong Yunho

summary: in which gumiho!reader / ninetailedfox!reader gets caught stealing persimmons by prince!yunho, however, one interaction between them spiraled more than what they have thought of

wc: 3k (this is my first time writing in the fantasy department and this is something that i somewhat have been passionate about! i really enjoyed writing this one and this one has become my favorite!!)

When Yunho was a young boy, his grandfather would take him to stroll around the palace gardens accompanied by Yunho's gaksimi's (housemaids), gungnyeo's (palace women) and his grandfather's uinyeo (female physician). It was always a lovely sight to see the former king bond with the next heir to the throne, watching them feed the fishes with bread or picking flowers together. One summer day, under the basking rays of the sun, the former king and Yunho took refuge under the pavilion of Changgyeonggung, the housemaids scattered quickly back to the kitchen to bring them snacks and refreshments.

"My Lord, the heat will not be good for your condition. May I suggest that we head back?" The female physician spoke kindly, bowing her head a little, but the former king smiled back to her and waved his hand dismissively.

"It would be such a waste not to enjoy this fine day." He spoke in a low, raspy tone due to his old age. "I would, rather spend my last days, with the future king with me." The female physician's lips curled into a tight smile and bowed her head. She knew better not to displease him and his grandson.

As the housemaid's came back with the food, five year old Yunho quickly sat on his knees and ate the flower shaped rice cakes. The former king, his grandfather, softly chuckled at Yunho before picking up the white tea pot.

"What an intricate design! This one" The former king spoke, holding up the tea pot a little higher that Yunho had to crane his neck up.

"Grandpa! I can't see it!" Yunho whined with the rice cakes in his mouth. He stood up and sat beside his grandfather. The tea pot had a painting of a white fox with nine tails.

"Creatures like this one truly exists" His grandfather pointed at the painting of the nine tailed fox before leaning close to Yunho's ear. "They think I'm crazy for believing creatures like this one, but I think they're crazy not believing that they really do exist!" Yunho chuckled at his grandfather's words. If his grandfather believes in them, so will he.

"I remember seeing one when I was boy" his grandfather recalled, pouring rice wine onto his cup. "I saw a white fox too! In the forest of Goryeo. What a beauty that white fox is." Yunho looked up and watched his grandfather smile to himself and bring the cup to his lips. "They say that they live for a long period of time. And can take form of any human they please to be. Feared by many, but I believe that it is the abuse of humans that drives them away"

"What do they eat, grandfather? Do they like rice cake too?" Yunho's asked, the innocence in him made his grandfather chuckle.

"They say they eat the heart or the liver of their prey, usually men" a chill ran down Yunho's small body. "But the white fox I saw, I cautiously approached with a persimmon in my hand. The white fox ate it!"

And just like that afternoon, Yunho and the former king, his grandfather, spent their afternoon talking about his grandfather's stories about that white fox he saw years back before they were called back by the palace guards to prepare for the Yudu festival happening tonight.

Fast forward to fourteen years later, his grandfather's sudden passing broke the hearts of many, including Yunho's. He was the only family member who loves him dearly. Yunho's father, the current king, was always busy with the scribes or out hunting with a few palace guards. His mother was a different story, Yunho's mother, the empress, loves to gossip with the sanggung's (palace matron) and nain's (assistant court ladies), apart from that, she loves adorning herself with beautiful jewelry that can blind anyone under the sun and having her paintings done by the palace painter.

Yunho, on the other hand, dreaded his life more than ever. Just like what his father mentioned to him before, he is at the age wherein he has to find a suitable bride for him and take the throne next. Just like that, his father brought neighboring princesses from different kingdoms. Yunho, who only wanted to devote himself in his studies and live his life to the fullest, even if it meant, breaking a few palace rules, did his best to make the princesses hate him.

One time, Yunho was growing bored with the princess when she was talking about her talents and skills that he started picking his nose and tossing it away from his randomly. When it landed on the princess' dress, she immediately left their castle. Another time while a princess tried to get close to Yunho, too close for his liking, he leaned close to her.

"I am not circumcised" his words was enough to make the princess be disgusted with him and never returned back to their land.

Recently, a princess from a distant land visited their kingdom with the hopes that she will make their only son fall for her. Yunho sniggered when she heard her words, earning him a glare from his father. While they were out walking in the palace gardens, Yunho stepped on her skirt, causing her to tumble down the hill. When she got back up on her feet, she was covered in grass and mud. Yunho, who was at the top of the hill, only watched her "accidental" misfortune. The princess was so angry that she told the king that she will never marry his son before leaving the palace.

"This will be the fourth princess coming into our kingdom. Have you no shame?" His father's words boomed across the royal hall where a few scribes and advisers witnessed the scene.

"You and your books have no place in this palace! At your age, I was already skilled at hunting and married! And if I were you, I'd given up and throw all your books away" The king spoke with such venom in his voice before walking out of the royal hall. Yunho was left standing in the middle of the hall. He didn't want to become like him, why would he be like his father? Instead of going to meet the fourt princess coming into their palace, Yunho set out of the palace to walk amongst the people in the market.

With a cloth wrapped around his head to conceal his identity, Yunho quietly escaped the palace, he remembered how his grandfather used this secret tunnel to get out whenever he was stressed with all the royal stuff around him. Once the bustling market greeted his sight, Yunho breathed the air and have never felt so alive.

He watched the children run around and play, others holding their mother's hand while their mother's make their purchases. Wooden carts being pushed, lovers strolling and eating. This was the kind of environment that Yunho has never seen until now. He was always confined by the safety and security of the palace and its guards, but being by himself, he has never felt so free and live. For once after his grandfather's passing, he felt happy.

The fresh fruits in the market looked vibrant and pleasing in his eyes. With hands to himself, Yunho strolled around the fruit area of the market, but a woman wearing ragged and baggy clothes stealthily took a persimmon from a cart and walked away. Thinking that no one saw her, Yunho followed her closely, for some reason, why was he so intrigued with a thief?

Yunho caught her stealing another persimmon from another vendor without being caught. He was impressed by her, this is what years of stealing training pays off. But on the third vendor, the woman was caught stealing and the beafy man caught her slim wrists.

"You will pay for that!"

But you couldn't speak and tried to pry the man's hand away from her. Yunho watched as you shook her head.

"What? You have no money? My business will fail because of you! You have to pay...with your hand!" The man held your wrist tightly and took out a butcher's knife. The people around them, including Yunho, watched was happening. Yunho immediately took the cloth above his head and stepped between them.

"Good morning kind sir! What is the problem here?" Yunho spoke with a smile on his face. The people gasped at his appearance and bowed on the dusty ground before him, even the beafy man dropped his butcher's knife and curtsied to him.

"Good Lord, what brings you here to a place like this? However, this woman right here is stealing from my business!" Yunho raised a hand infront of the man's face.

"This woman you speak of is with me. Please, treat her with some respect." Pulling something out of his sleeve, Yunho took out five gold coins.

"I believe this is more than enough for one persimmon?" The beafy man's eyes widened at the sight of the gold coins before him. Smiling widely he nodded and profusedly thanked the crown prince. Yunho turned around and spotted you behind him with your head hung low. Placing an arm around you made your head shot up at him. Yunho's heart instantly beated quickly. You who he caught stealing and saved your hand just now, is a beautiful woman. Long thick eyelashes, chocolate brown orbs, porcelain white skin and pink lips. He blushed as he leaned down to your ear, whispering "Follow me". You only nodded your head and away from the market you left.

Once away from the hustle and bustle of the town, Yunho led the you to a lesser crowded place, more likely through the entrance of the forest, where it is only just the two of them.

"A thank you would be nice" Yunho suddenly spoke, but you only blushed, not moving your lips to speak.

"Did you hear me? I said a thank you would be nice" Yunho spoke a little louder, peering close to your face. But your cheeks blushed a deeper shade of red. Once your eyes meet, Yunho took note of your cool grey orbs. They were brown back there-

You shook your head.

Yunho took him a minute to realize that you could not speak. Hence why you were communicating with him through your short responses with your head.

"That's sad" Yunho spoke, he took one persimmon out from your hand and started peeling it for you. As he gave it to you, he watched you delightedly take it from his hand and eat it happily. He wondered if you were born from the lower class, a slave to be exact. He then wondered what would have happened if he didn't come into your rescue. Would you still have your hand? Or would they meet the first time without your hand?

Once he snapped out of his thoughts, you were no longer beside him. He turned his head left and right, wondering where you could have gone without telling him anything. And not from afar, Yunho caught sight of your ragged clothing, hiding behind the tree, he watched as you walk and slowly bend down on the ground.

On the ground, you started to walk in all fours and with a beam of silver light, transformed into a white fox. Your tail splitting into two, then splitting into nine. Yunho's eyes widened and immediately ran back to the tunnel and back to the castle.

Later that night, Yunho's father was once again displeased with him.

"Why must you embarrass me in front of the Silla family?" His voice boomed in the royal hall room once more that the court ladies of his mother jumped out of fear. Yunho, stone faced, said nothing to his father.

"The princess came here and was waiting for you. But you weren't around" His father stood close to him, chest to chest and his face turning into bright red in color.

"Instead, I heard that from the maids that you were in the market! With a woman!" there was a pause "Is that rue?"

"Yes" Yunho spoke immediately but confidently. He watched as his father's furrowed eyebrows and expression softened before turning his back on him.

"Why do you continue to be like this? Do you not want to take the throne? Or do you want to live a life with that wench?"

"She is no wench!"

"Are you taking her side now?"

Yunho kept quiet to this.

"You speak when I'm talking to you!"

"I am not taking anyone's side"

"Show some respect to me! Your father!"

Yunho's blood began to boil, his jaw tensing. "When were you ever a father to me?" He spoke lowly, enough for only the people around the hall room to hear before leaving the place.

While on his way to his chamber, he passed by a window that overlooks the palace gardens. He swore in the corner of his eye that he saw a white fox sitting on top of rock, watching him.

From that moment on, Yunho would continue to become the palace's headache more than being a crowned prince, secretly meeting and letting you enter inside the palace and into his room. He would secretly bring you inside his room and ask one of the guards to bring him a basket persimmons because "he was hungry when he woke up from his sleep".

Yunho found out that you were a gumiho, a nine tailed fox who lived for about six hundred years, explaining why you could transform as a human. Instead of devouring human heart and liver, you preferred to eat persiommons because of its sweet taste. He asked if you wanted to become a cheonho, but you shook your head and ate more of the fruit.

When the sun would start to rise, he would let you out through the tunnel he knew. Watching you secretly escape and not wake the royal guards around. The little rendezvous made Yunho's heart bear faster, he could perfectly say that no royal daughter would ever capture his heart like how you could.

When the monks from the north came to bless the palace, all eight monks sensed a strange but weak yin energy as they stepped foot inside. Yunho's father tried to entertainment them away but as they walked towards Yunho's royal chamber, it was found that his room is the source of where the yin energy was coming from. And now Yunho was forced to put ofuda's (or talisman papers) to bring in more luck.

While the monks, his mother and father walked away from his room, Yunho stayed back and quickly tore them down. Knowing that once you step foot into his room, you would feel an unpleasant feeling. And Yunho didn't want to become the reason of your death.

Unbeknownst to Yunho, a certain monk stayed behind the castle. That night, the monk did not bat an eyelid down and waited if anything or anyone would show up. It was already getting late when he caught sight of a woman or who he thought was a slave secretly met up with the crown prince. Even though they were a few feet away from him, the monk could feel the dark energy around the woman. And closely did he follow them. But his efforts of following them and finding out what they were doing were fruitless and Yunho shut the doors of the castle behind him.

It has been two months and a half since Yunho kept bringing you inside the castle. He was already formulating a plan; a plan wherein he would buy a handful of silk feminine hanboks, shoes and accessories, create an unheard kingdom and present you as the unheard kingdom's daughter. But he never told you about this, he wanted it to be a surprise on the third month of meeting you. Because the third month signifies as the one hundred day he fell for you.

Yunho stared at your brown eyes. He didn't know which one he preferred, your human brown eyes or your grey fox eyes. But still, you were you. Slowly did Yunho's face come close to you and your lips met. It was the first time Yunho kisses a girl, but there was no awkwardness between you two. It felt right.

He enjoyed your soft and moisturized lips on his, leaning away to gaze at your face before taking your lips again. Slowly his tongue darted in and out of your mouth, his hands moving up and down from your back to your waist, your arms wrapped around his neck. And for a moment, Yunho felt a ball slip into his mouth.

It was the yeowoo guseul or a deep kiss, as his grandfather told him. As Yunho swallowed the marble, he could feel his energy being transmitted to you. But he didn't cared. At least if he swallowed the marble, he would forever remember you and not miss one memory with you.

As the sun starts to rise, Yunho led you out of the castle. But what he didn't expect to see were eight monks and a group of palace soldiers ready to strike you.

"Grandfather look! I caught a persimmon from falling off the tree!"

Yunho, now in his eighties, smiled at his grandson for showing him the ripe fruit that he caught in his hand.

"Will the fox gods be pleased with my offer?" Yunho's five year old grandson asked in a a small voice, Yunho smiled and nodded his head before watching his grandson run back to gather more persimmon's.

When the sun was setting, Yunho couldn't attend the festival, he stayed back in the palace and took a night stroll around the garden. Dismissing the court ladies and the palace guards when they tried to follow him. Saying it would be a hassle and he only wanted to be accompanied by his thoughts.

Yunho walked around, trying to recall his memories because his old age was one by one slowly disregarding it for him. He could remember a few things, but they were blurry. Underneath the persimmon tree, was you.

Yunho lets out a faint chuckle. "I remember you" he spoke in a low, raspy tone due to his old age. He watches as you smile and walked up to him. You who never age and still stayed beautiful after all these years.

"I remember you" you spoke for the first time.

(gif is not mine! credits to the rightful owner!)

#ateez angst #ateez fluff #ateez au #ateez scenarios #ateez fanfic #ateez yunho #ateez x reader #ateez imagines #jeong yunho #jung yunho #ateez oneshot #ateez fantasy au #ateez yunho x reader #ateez mingi #ateez san #ateez wooyoung #ateez seonghwa #ateez jongho #ateez hongjoong #ateez yeosang

[annab-nana]

ANNA I SAW U REBLOG THIS POST AND I’M BEGGING U TO PLEASE WRITE THIS FOR RAFE 😩😩

oh you got it love!! this sounds adorable :))

you wished so desperately for the neighbor on your right to close his kitchen window because you didn't know how much longer you would be able to resist such an aroma. being pregnant was hard. without much of a support system, it was even harder. one of the main reasons you moved to the outer banks was because it was where your grandpa lived. all your other relatives had passed on, didn't speak to you, or possibly didn't even know you existed, but your grandpa was there through it all. when you were on the phone with him one day, he was telling you about how the quaint little house next door was up for sale and mentioned you moving in there if you didn't want to move in with him, knowing you liked to have your space. so that's where you were now and you felt a lot more secure with your grandfather right there to help you when your little boy arrived in six short weeks. but right now, that little boy clearly wanted whatever your neighbor was cooking and you were too tired to put up a fight.

you felt like an idiot for what you were doing but grabbed a plate regardless. this would certainly be a first impression to remember. you chuckled at yourself before leaving your house and waddling over to his. you tried to let any embarrassment flush out of your body as you knocked on the innocent man's door.

"you're y/n, right?" the tall—and very gorgeous now that you were seeing him up close—man asked with a smile.

"um, yeah. you know my grandpa?" you returned to make conversation and to figure out how he knew you before having to make your random request.

"he knew my mom and tells me stories about her all the time." the man grinned, one that didn't quite reach his eyes which told you something unfortunate had happened to his mother. you nodded and prepared yourself for this very nice man to write you off as a weirdo and send you on your way.

"okay, i know this is odd, but i smelled what you were cooking and it smells fantastic so i was wondering if i could have some?" it was then when he noticed you had brought a plate with you, the action making you look even more adorable in his eyes. how was he to turn down the very cute lady? he simply couldn't.

"yeah, sure. come on in, but you're going to need a bowl," he told you while leading you inside. he grabbed you a bowl and used the ladle to scoop up some of the soup he had prepared. he placed the bowl on the plate you brought and put some cornbread he had also made on the side. "i think that should be enough for now. if you want some more, you are welcome to come back."

"i'm sorry about this by the way. i know it's kinda weird," you spoke shyly, looking down at the food you had just been given and feeling guilty about it.

"it's okay. you gotta feed the baby and we can't help that they know what good cooking smells like." his comment made you feel better about the situation as well as eliciting a giggle from you. "you are welcome to sniff out my food anytime."

"well thank you..." you trailed off, realizing you hadn't gotten the stranger's name.

"rafe," he filled in the blank for you and you sent him a grin.

"thank you, rafe. i'll have to cook you something in return," you told him while you both maneuvered closer to the door.

"don't stress it, but you could come over and have dinner with me if you'd like," he offered, leaning against the door frame when you stepped out of the house and onto the porch.

"maybe another day? i've got laundry to do, but i'd love to see what else you can make."

"i'd like that," he spoke before you thanked him again and bid him goodbye. he watched you waddle back over to your house with the proudest smile on your face and wave at him when you turned to see him still at his door. he swore he had never seen anyone as cute as you.

send in some blurbs

#pogueslandia #blurbs #rafe cameron #rafe cameron blurbs

[tefilovesreading]

Long overdue. Charlie Gillespie x OC

A/N: I’m really happy to finally share this one, it took me a while to finish it but I’m proud with the final result. I hope you love it as much as I do. 

Summary: Charlie and Olivia used to be best friends, until he left their hometown to pursue his acting career without saying goodbye to his best friend, ruining their friendship. They meet again four years later.

Word count: +6k

Warning: some swearing, mention of a panic attack, angst???? 

Special thanks to my lovely @theamazingtomholland​ for helping me out and your sweet words! Also thanks to @thelawiswiththerose​ !!

MASTERLIST 

When Olivia was just a kid, her grandfather used to joke about how she would grow up to become a historian because her memory was amazing,and she believed him. Until she realized that she had an excellent memory only when it came to things that matter to her or that made her the young woman she was now. She remembered meeting her current best friend on April 7th,four years ago. She knew her heart got broken for the first time on March 31st when she was only fifteen, it was a Monday, and she didn’t cry because she needed to get through her classes. Or how she lost a piece of herself when her grandpa died when she was just five years old on May 31st.

She unlocked her phone and felt her heart get a little bit heavier when she saw the date on the screen:

August 26.

Four years ago, when they both were eighteen, things were easier for sure, at least for Charlie. Olivia wasn’t doing bad either but seeing her childhood best friend kiss another girl in front of her wasn’t something she enjoyed. How could someone watch the person they’ve loved for years kiss someone else and not feel like they were getting their heart crushed little by little?

They spent the day with their friends, celebrating Charlie’s last birthday near the river before he moved to Toronto to pursue his acting career a week later. Olivia could still remember how happy he looked sitting next to the bonfire; his arms wrapped around his then- girlfriend laughing about something his friend had said. Sat just across from them, giving the couple and herself some space, she knew her heart was going to break again that night. And it did because he ditched her at the end of the night when he was supposed to make sure she got home safely just like he promised her parents he would.

She remembered how scared she felt walking back home in the dark by herself even when she knew their neighbourhood was safe and she wasn’t far from her house. But she was terrified of darkness and Charlie was the only one in their group of friends that knew it. Olivia cursed his name over and over again for putting her in that position, for leaving her alone, and thinking about the reason made her feel sick. Of course, she knew why he left without telling her but admitting it out loud wasn’t something she was willing to do.

Her phone vibrated in her hand and she rubbed her eyes, making her put that memory away. It was her mother letting her know that their flight had just landed, and they were ready for their two weeks in the Caribbean.

“Seems like it’s gonna be just us, Peanut,” she whispered to the black dog curled up next to her on the couch. Scratching the dog’s belly, she turned her attention back to the TV where Meryl Streep was singing Money, Money, Money.

Her stomach growled, remembering that she barely had eaten something and it was already dinner time.

Noises outside her house caught her attention, they sounded a lot like laughs, instead of making her way to the kitchen, she went to the closest window and peeked outside just enough for her heart to drop.

He was there laughing without a care in the world, his hair falling back in messy waves that her fingers suddenly needed to touch.

Closing the curtains before her neighbors could see her, she wiped furiously the lonely tear that managed to escape from her eyes before it could leave a trail down her cheek.

What was he doing here? He was supposed to be in Los Angeles, not here. She made sure not to be in town whenever she thought he could come back, spending numerous mother’s days somewhere else, or making sure she wasn’t home for his mother’s birthday. Christmas was easier because her entire family gathered up in her grandma’s house every single year. But he never came back to their hometown for his birthday, until this year.

The anger she felt after his birthday four years ago came back like an earthquake, making her body tremble with the feeling she kept bottled up for so long.

It wasn’t just the fact that Charlie left her on her own when he promised to take her back home. He didn’t apologize the day after for leaving her alone or the day after that one. Hell, he didn’t try to talk to her that entire week and when the week came to its end, he just left, not even saying goodbye to her.

Charlie moved out and never looked back. As if he completely forgot about the girl that was his best friend since they both were eight years old. The same girl that stood up for him whenever the mean guys at their school made fun of him for not getting the part after his first couple auditions. The same girl he spent so many summers playing with, countless winters playing in the snow with her until they felt like their fingers were beyond frozen.

That was what she was hurt and mad about. He forgot about her existence and all the memories they ever made together. And Olivia couldn’t do the same because even if she hated to admit it, she still loved him, maybe not like she used to, but she still had love to give to the boy standing outside the house she used to spend so much of her free time when she was younger.

And because the universe was against her, the dog ran towards the front door, barking at it and letting her know that she wanted to go out for a walk.

“We can’t go now, baby,” she shushed Peanut, but the small dog didn’t try to pay attention to her words and kept barking and spinning in excitement. She wanted to go out now and not even a treat would make her change her mind, “you are so stubborn, Pea.”

Peanut was a small dog, but her barks were resonating all over the house, breaking the silence and she knew it was about time someone came and ringed the doorbell to make sure everything was alright. A fast exit, that was what she needed, she could put her earbuds on and pretend she was going for a run, give them a small nod if they still were outside and get out of there as fast as she could.

She put her sneakers on, put on some music, opened the door, and tugged lightly on the dog leash to make her dog walk. Not looking at the people standing in the driveway was a difficult task, because she never stopped greeting the rest of the Gillespie family. How could she? It wasn’t their fault that her friendship with Charlie went to shit.

“Hey!” Meghan called her and turning her head slowly she nodded at them and pointed to her earbuds as if she were on the phone.

Charlie looked at her and realized she was avoiding his eyes, not even acknowledging his presence. Looking at the way her features had changed, turning her into a beautiful young woman, the childish features were long gone, which let him know how long it has been since the last time he saw her in person.  Her long light brown hair was now up to her shoulders and a few shades lighter. Watching her walk away made his heart ache in a way he didn’t feel since he moved out.

“I didn’t know the Gibson still lived here.” The words came out loud enough for his sister to listen to what he said, and she punched him in the arm.

“She made sure to be out of town every time you came home, dumbass,” making a grimace he nodded, not wanting to talk about the subject, “I still don’t understand what happened between you guys, you were really good friends, and I was sure you liked her as more than a friend.”

He rolled his eyes, knowing damn well Meghan wasn’t going to just drop it, “it’s none of your business.”

“My guess is you told her you liked her, and she rejected you,” Patrick said with a knowing look on his face. Charlie snorted and shook his head.

“Again,” he warned, “drop it, guys.” His brother held his hand up and went inside, leaving him alone with his younger sister.

“All I’m gonna say is you should try to not mess with her, Charlie,” Meghan held him by his arm, making sure he was paying attention to her word, “it was awful to see how sad and broken she was when you left and I know you said it’s none of my business, but I was her friend too and she pushed me away for whatever the fuck happened between you two.”

“I won’t, Meg,” he promised, guiding her inside so Olivia didn’t have to see him once she came back. But if he was being honest, he didn��t want to see the pain in her face she failed to hide when she saw him standing next to Meghan.

Sprinting back to her house, Olivia let out a sigh of relief when she saw that Charlie wasn’t outside anymore. She didn’t really know how to feel, sure she felt as angry as she did four years ago but seeing Charlie in person after so long brought a feeling she didn’t know how to describe. And of course, she wasn’t blind and knew that he looked even better than he did before he left, so that didn’t really help her situation.

Looking back to his house one last time, she caught him in the window, and he gave her a small smile she didn’t return. Instead, she unlocked the front door and slammed it shut. If Charlie thought that she would act as if nothing happened, he was wrong. Not even his smile could erase how betrayed she felt. 

After a long early walk with Peanut the next day, she hoped she wouldn’t have to go out and run into Charlie again. The feeling that he was going to try and approach her the next time they ran into each other gave her goosebumps. Olivia knew that talking things out would make her feel a lot better, but she wasn’t ready to do it. He would want to know why she was so angry and hurt and that meant she would have to tell him she used to be in love with him and how betrayed she felt when he left without apologizing, leaving behind their friendship as if it meant absolutely nothing to him.

With an iced tea in one hand and a book in the other, she made herself comfortable in the hammock her father hanged every summer. Peanut was trying to catch her tail and the only noise Olivia could hear were the birds above her.

She lost track of time and Peanut’s barks brought her back to reality. Crouched in her garden was Charlie, trying to get the black dog to stay put so he could pet her, but she was too excited to see someone and was running around him and barking.

“What are you doing here?” her voice came out hoarse, her body too tense with Charlie just a few feet away.

“I wanted to say hi,” he responded without looking at her and still trying to pet Peanut.

“Peanut come here,” Olivia commanded, and the little dog ran up to her owner, “you need to leave.”

“C’mon, Liv,” Charlie stood up and looked at her with puppy eyes, “I just wanna talk.”

“Olivia,” she corrected him and picked up her dog, “you need to leave now.”

“Why?” he demanded to know once he saw her walking towards the door. She turned around stunned by his audacity.

“You have no right to be here, Charlie,” he raised his eyebrows, taken back at her harsh answer, “you don’t get to call me Liv or come into my house so I’m telling you again. Leave. Now.”

“Just listen to me, please,” Olivia shook her head and went inside, slamming the door behind her.

She was able to take a couple of steps away from the door when she had to kneel, feeling like she was about to pass out, her heart pounding fast in her chest and her lungs barely being able to hold air inside them. Peanut licked her face trying to calm her down, but the tears kept falling down her cheeks.

“Liv, please.” Charlie’s voice sounded worried on the other side of the door. “Let me in.” A whimpering sound came out of her mouth and the next thing she heard was the door being open.

She wished Charlie’s embrace could comfort her and calm her down, but she kept crying into her hands. Her heart too fragile now that Charlie was everywhere, his smell, his touch, and his voice were too much for her.

Charlie picked her up and took her to her bedroom. A strong feeling of nostalgia took over him when he saw the room hadn’t changed much, probably because she also moved out and moved on with her life after he left.

“I’ll get you a glass of water and then I’m gonna leave, I promise.” A scoff was all he received.

“As if you knew how to keep one,” she muttered with bitterness when she heard him leave her room.

He placed a glass of water on her nightstand, “do you want me to call my sister to keep you company?” she shook her head and closed her eyes too tired to keep fighting against him.

“Are you feeling better?” Charlie asked again and wiped a tear from Olivia’s cheek with his thumb. With a small nod, she turned her back to him. “Liv, I really wanna talk.”

“Stop calling me Liv, please.” The mattress shifted when Charlie sat beside her, not wanting to leave yet.

“I’ve never called you Olivia.”

“Charlie.” Her voice sounded raspy and incredibly tired and he couldn’t help but feel guilty for making her feel like that. “I really need you to leave me alone and let me get my shit together. Please.”

“Right,” Charlie stood up quickly and looked around not really knowing what else to say, “I’m sorry, Olivia. I never meant to make you feel like I cornered you or something.”

She didn’t respond, and when she heard the front door closing, she covered her head with a pillow and let out a scream. She hated to feel so powerless, so confused and so hurt. It felt like he just decided to reopen a wound that took too long to close and now it was painfully bleeding again.

It was heartbreaking to see her sobbing on the floor and not being able to calm her, to tell her that he never meant to leave like that.

“Where were you?” his sister questioned when she saw him with guilt all over his face, “Charlie, I told you not to mess with Olivia. What did you do now?”

“I don’t know.” He did though. He knew what did just a few minutes ago and what he did four years ago.

“Is she alright?” the hazel-eyed boy nodded and then shrugged, rubbing his palms over his face, feeling the frustration take over his body.

“I needed to talk to her, but she shot me down the moment she saw me, and then I think she was about to have a panic attack or something. She was better when I left.”

Charlie didn’t remember seeing her like that when they still were friends, Olivia was so determined and optimistic, not as impulsive as he was but always open for a new adventure or a trip with him and his siblings. But then, he started to have feelings for his best friend and decided that it wasn’t worth it to ruin their friendship and buried those feelings by getting a girlfriend just to act as if he wasn’t in love with Olivia. He knew it was mutual but what was the point of dating if he was going to move to Toronto and she was going to stay in New Brunswick.

Leaving her after his birthday four years ago was one of the things he regretted the most. He knew damn well she was afraid of the dark and yet he broke his promise. Charlie tried to put some distance between them so it wouldn’t hurt as much once he moved out, but he ended up messing everything.

“She didn’t even let me call her Liv, Meg.” His sister sat next to him and hugged him.

“We stopped calling her like that after you left,” she explained feeling sorry for him, “I guess it reminded her of you too much since you were the one that gave her the nickname.”

At lunchtime, Charlie made his way to his ex-best friend’s house with a portion of his birthday cake and the Tuna Pasta Salad his mom cooked for lunch. It wasn’t like he was planning to have lunch with her, but if getting her lunch and dessert gave him another shot, he’d even consider getting her breakfast the next morning.

He opened the backdoor just like he just did when they were younger and went straight into the kitchen, hoping she wouldn’t catch him sneaking into her house.

“Fuck it,” he whispered when he didn’t hear noise upstairs. With the food now in a tray, Charlie went upstairs.

Liv was in the same place she was before he left earlier. The Scottie lifted her head when he entered the room but didn’t bark at him and curled up again next to her sleeping owner. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he put the tray down and let out his breath.

“Hey,” his voice broke the silence they were in and Olivia moved in her sleep but didn’t wake up, “I got you food, Liv,” He said again this time a little bit louder.

“What?” she questioned; her mind fuzzy with sleep to understand what was happening.

“My mom made lunch and if I’m not wrong, it was your favorite.” The answer was simple, but why would he even bother to get her lunch if she told him to leave her alone.

“What time is it?” she asked again sitting up in bed rubbing her left eye with her hand.

“Time for you to eat,” the boy pointed to the tray next to her and stood up, “I brought you cake, I thought you’d like it.”

“Thanks?” Charlie let out a soft laugh and left. “Charlie!” She called out and he came back with a hopeful look in his eyes. “I made it,” Olivia pointed at the cake and his cheek started to turn pink in embarrassment.

“You made my birthday cake.”

Olivia shrugged as if it was nothing. “Meg asked me to,” she grabbed the fork and continued, “you know it’s my job, right?”

“What do you mean?” Charlie sat again in the bed taking every chance to keep the conversation going.

“I have a bakery.” She had a fucking bakery, and he didn’t even know. How would he? He never made questions about her, but he thought his family would tell him such a big thing. “Thanks for the food.” And that was his sign for him to leave.

“Thanks for the birthday cake.”

Olivia had her own bakery and made him a birthday cake, it was her job but still, she knew it was for him and made it anyway.  That had to mean something, right?

Charlie was right, it was her favorite meal. She could have graduated from one of the most prestigious cooking schools in Canada but not even her fancy cooking school could beat Jeannette’s salad. She remembered Jeannette telling her that the magic was in her secret ingredient when she was younger and after all this time, she still wasn’t able to figure out what it was.

Her phone vibrated with a new notification and she smiled when she saw a picture of her parents with cocktails in their hands. She hated the fact that she’d have to leave a couple of days before they came back, but she needed to go and pack the few things she still had left in her old apartment back in Vancouver and move all her stuff across the country and into her new apartment.

The doorbell woke up the puppy from her nap and ran towards the door, letting Olivia know someone was outside.

“You would never think those barks belong to such a tiny animal,” Meghan chuckled when she opened the door and Peanut started to jump around her.

“Oh, I know, I get startled sometimes and she’s only eight months old,” she let the girl in not before giving the house across the street a nervous look.

“Char and my brothers went out,” Olivia nodded and thanked her quietly for the information, “I was bored so I thought you’d want to hang out.”

“Oh, sure,” she smiled at Charlie’s sister and felt guilty for all those times she said no whenever Meghan invited her over to hang out like they used to do, “I wanted to go to the farm and pick some fresh berries. I don’t know if you wanna go with me.”

“I don’t know,” Meghan scrunched her nose, and the gesture reminded the older girl of Charlie. If she didn’t grow up with them, she could’ve thought they were twins, “I’ll go only if you make me muffins.”

“That’s unfair,” Olivia said playfully, “I’m gonna change and we can head out.”

“I’m gonna stay right here so I can play with this cute baby,” Meghan cooed the dog and sat on the floor to play with her.

Running back into her room, she changed into some overalls and a top. She wanted to be comfortable on the farm and be able to move around without worrying about her skirt getting caught in the branches.

“I swear you and my brother are the only people I know that love wearing overalls,” Olivia’s cheeks blushed at her words, remembering very well how often Charlie used to come over wearing overalls and no shirt underneath.

“They’re comfy,” she said looking at her outfit with slight embarrassment.

“You look great, Liv.” Her eyes darted back at Meghan and decided not to make a big deal about the nickname.

“Your car or mine?” she questioned, picking up the keys and her bag.

“Yours, I don’t feel like driving.”

When Charlie landed his first role, he would spend a lot of time out of town filming, and eventually, both girls became closer. She could never compare her friendship with Meghan with the one she once had with Charlie because they were inseparable, they spent so much time together she was sure she had her first period when they were playing over at his house and both freaked out because they didn’t know what to do. Later that day he came over to her house with a chocolate bar and a single flower.

“My mom said you’d probably want some chocolate, so I got you your favourite.” She remembered the eleven years old Charlie said with his cheeks burning red.

She sighed at the memory, realizing how even such an important milestone in her life somehow involved the boy that was messing with her head lately.

“So…,” Meghan started once they both were on the road, “Charlie almost threw a tantrum because none told him you had a bakery.”

Olivia chuckled just imagining Charlie pouting with his arms crossed over his chest, “he never asked you guys.”

“It’s not that he didn’t ask about you,” She bit the inside of her cheek getting a little bit uncomfortable with the conversation, “I guess we all decided not to tell him about your life like he didn’t really deserve updates about you.”

“I get it,” stopping the car at a red light, she smiled at the girl sitting next to her, “I’m glad you didn’t have to deal with questions about me because if he wanted to know something, he should’ve asked me himself.”

Not like she’d have answered his calls or texts because she didn’t know if she would have. She thought she might have answered if he had reached out for her, but he never did.

Hanging out with Meghan was like breathing fresh air, both girls laughing and messing around while they picked fresh blueberries, their fingers getting tinted with the fruit’s juice. Snapping the last picture with their blueberries, they went back home.

“Can I post this one?” Meghan asked, showing her the picture where a smiling Olivia was holding a single blueberry in front of the camera while Meghan stuck her tongue out. 

“Sure, I like it. Send me the others so I can post one too,” she commented, looking at the picture quickly before turning her attention back to the road ahead.

Once they got back home, Meghan took place in one of the stools in the kitchen, while Olivia got everything she needed to bake. She was about to start the mixer when her friend got a text and cursed under her breath.

“Everything alright?” she wondered with a raised eyebrow, confused at her friend’s reaction.

“I have to teach a dance class and I completely forgot about it,” with an apology written all over her face, she stood up and gathered her stuff, “I’m sorry, Liv, but I need to go or I’m gonna have a bunch of angry moms complaining about my absence.”

“Yeah, sure. Go don’t worry,” Olivia assured her with a chuckle, “I’ll take these babies to your house once they’re ready.”

“You’re the best. Thank you!” Meghan stated before running back to her own house.

Deciding it was better to put on some music while she baked, she went to connect her phone to the Bluetooth speaker when the back door opened, and Charlie waved at her with a shy expression on his face.

“Meg said you could use some help with the muffins.”

“Uhm…” Olivia frowned her brows slightly, knowing this was Charlie trying to apologize and make things better, “just put on some music,” she handed him the speaker and started the mixer.

She wasn’t sure how she felt with him sitting on the stool his sister was on just a few minutes ago, but the burning anger she felt the first day she saw him was missing. But they were far from being friends again, she told herself.

“How was your hike?” The words left her mouth quietly as an attempt to make small conversation and feel a little less observed by him.

“It was great, we got a bunch of nice pictures,” and there it was, she smiled to herself when she heard the excitement in Charlie’s voice, “we had to come back earlier because Pat’s bike got a flat tire, but it was fun.”

“So, you guys went cycling,” she stated the obvious just to make him talk about his little trip. God, she missed the way Charlie used to tell her about his day and how excited he was about little things, the same excitement he had now as he told her about the perfect spot that he found to take pictures and how he promised to a couple that he would send the cute picture he took of them as soon as he could.

Charlie used to remind her of a puppy, filled with excitement and energy and she let out a chuckle when she realised he was just like he was when they were teenagers.

“Did I miss my own joke?” he questioned, tilting his head with amusement. 

Olivia shrugged, without bothering to look at him, too busy with her task, and said, “you’re just like a puppy, Charlie.”

“You used to tell me that a lot back then,” he pondered biting his lower lip, the energy in the room shifting at the mention of the friendship they used to have.

“I know.”

She didn’t know what else to say because she didn’t know how she felt about their interaction. Or the fact that Charlie was sitting there, just a few feet away from her just like they used to be when they were younger. Him watching and telling her stories while she busied herself with a new recipe.

“I’m glad one of us actually became a chef,” Charlie spoke again, breaking the silence. The girl didn’t respond, she poured the mix into the muffin cups not letting his words disrupt her. Once the tray was in the oven, she turned around and crossed her arms over her chest, feeling the nostalgia wash away and the resentment took its place.

“Some of us stick to what we said, Charles.” The bitterness in her voice made the boy close his eyes, knowing very well the course this conversation was about to take.

“How many times do I have to apologize, Olivia?” She scoffed and shook her head in disbelief.

“You haven't said sorry not even once, Charlie.” Sure he said sorry for getting into her backyard without permission and invading her space the past two days, but he never apologized for the shitty move he did four years ago.

“You don’t even let me talk!” He argued back.

“Oh, come on, Charlie!” Olivia rolled her eyes and pointed a finger at him, “don’t start with that bullshit because you had a whole week to apologize for leaving me on my own when you said you’d walk me home, but you chose to stay quiet and then leave the town without even saying goodbye.”

“Shit, Liv,” he whispered when he saw her eyes welling up with tears, “please don’t cry.”

“Do you even realize how bad I felt when you left without saying goodbye?” she questioned drying her cheeks with the back of her hand, “I saw you get in that car with all your belongings and I waited for you to come and say goodbye, to text me or call me but you just left and now you come here as if nothing happened.”

“Liv, I’m sorry,” he told her, standing up so he could get closer to the girl that was facing him with hurt in her eyes, fighting to hold back the tears from falling. “You need to believe when I tell you I’m fucking sorry for doing that.”

She jerked away from him when he tried to hold her. “Thanks for the apology,” Olivia inhaled deeply, the scent of Charlie’s cologne too intoxicating now that she was trying not to fall apart in front of him.

“If you want me to go, I’ll go,” he mumbled, understanding she probably needed some space.

“I’ll take the muffins to your place once they’re done.”

Charlie stood there, right in front of the girl that once was his partner in crime, but now they were practically strangers to each other and that was all his fault. He wished he could hold Olivia in his arms and tell her over and over again how deeply sorry he was for being such a coward, for leaving her without an explanation. He just wanted to take away all the pain he already caused her and somehow still manage to hurt her again. With a heavy sigh, the boy turned around and headed back to his house.

She sat in one of the stools, trying to calm her heart down and process whatever just happened. Charlie apologized but the annoying feeling that she needed more than just an apology didn’t leave her chest. An explanation would be good, maybe that way she would be able to actually forgive him and understand why he did it because right now, she didn’t really see them being friends again. Not when she was still holding a grudge against him.

Standing outside Charlie’s front door, with a tray full of freshly baked muffins in her hands, Olivia decided to go through the side door. She was met with nothing but silence while she made her way into the kitchen and saw a figure sitting with a guitar near the river through the window. Unlike her house, Charlie’s backyard was next to the river and the woods, where she remembered playing hide and seek with Charlie and Meghan when they were little.

She left the tray on the kitchen counter and headed to where Charlie was sitting. It was weird walking around his house, after all, she avoided the Gillespie family as much as she could when Charlie left and kept their interaction to a minimum, and hadn’t been inside in a long time.

“Hey,” she said softly, taking place next to him, “I brought the muffins.”

“Thanks, Liv,” he gave her a small smile before he continued playing a soft melody on his guitar. 

“I still don’t understand why you did it,” Olivia managed to say after a few minutes of sitting together in complete silence. 

“I didn’t want to, it just happened and then I fucked up things even more by not saying goodbye,” he explained and looked at her, “I thought I could just sneak out with Quinn because your house wasn’t far, I mean we were right here that day, and I wasn’t really thinking.”

“But that doesn’t explain why you didn’t talk to me that week before you left.”

He placed the guitar by his side, turning around to give Olivia his full attention, she looked at him with a mix of sadness and shyness in her brown eyes. 

“When I left with Quinn we were going to her place and hook up, I’m sure you know that, but we didn’t ‘cause I called her Liv right before we did anything,” her cheeks blushed at his confession but unable to believe his words entirely, “that’s why we broke up soon after my birthday, and I was so fucking embarrassed about my feelings…”

“You were embarrassed because you liked me, way to go, Charlie,” she interrupted him slightly offended. 

“I didn’t say that, let me finish,” He demanded getting frustrated with the conversation, “I was embarrassed because I called her your name because I was thinking of you in a moment I shouldn’t have,” he paused unsure of how Olivia was going to react at his next word, “that’s when I realised my feelings for you were a lot stronger than I thought and I got scared because I knew I was leaving.” 

“Charlie,” she told him, confusion laced in her voice “did you even like Quinn?”

“No, not really. I kinda forced myself to be with her ‘cause I didn’t want to ruin our friendship” Charlie answered and then let out a sad laugh, “I guess it didn’t work out as good as I thought.”

“You know I liked you, right?” her voice was barely a whisper and her stomach fluttered when she saw him smile at her and nodded in response, “was I that obvious really?” When Charlie nodded again she covered her face with her hands in pure embarrassment.

“I’m really sorry, Liv,” he apologized again, and she rested her head on his shoulder, “if I could take all that back I’d do it in a heartbeat.”

“I guess I understand now,” Charlie could hear the soft smile even if he wasn’t seeing her face, “don’t get me wrong, it hurt like shit to see how you moved on as if I didn’t exist, but I get that you were scared and we both ended up messing up our friendship.”

“Do you think we’ll ever be able to be friends again?” Olivia turned around, meeting his gaze and sighed. 

“Maybe?” she answered, scrunching her nose unsure of it.

They stayed like that for a while, Charlie’s gaze moving from her eyes to her lips from time to time, debating if he should just go for it or not. It was her that took the initiative and leaned in, pressing their lips together in a kiss that, just like the apology, was long overdue. 

“I’ll take that as a no,” he murmured against her lips before kissing her again, leaving the shyness behind and cupping her face between his hands pulling her closer as if that way they could make up all the time they spent apart.

They both pulled away when they heard his older brother hollering at them from the balcony and Olivia laughed when Charlie flipped him the middle finger. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead.

Of course, they still needed to talk a lot and find a way to work things out now that their feelings were out on display. But she had a good feeling about giving them a new shot, because, after all those years, they still managed to find their way back to each other.

#charlie gillespie imagine #charlie gillespie x oc #charlie gillespie fanfic #charlie gillespie one shot #jatp cast imagine #charlie gillespie x reader #charlie gillespie x y/n #luke patterson x reader #jatp imagine

[alengmae]

Rabble Drabble V: Advances

Colin fights off the advances of his wife in a drunken stupor.

A/N: Just so people know that I’m not completely heartless from the last chapter of my other fic. Here’s pure fluff. Enjoy!

Penelope glanced at the grandfather clock near the fireplace. It’s getting late and Colin was still not home. She wasn’t bothered much. It was a guy’s night out, after all. Whenever Michael, Benedict and Philip were in town, all the Bridgerton males made time to meet up and hang out. This guy’s night happened once every other month. 

She’s not worried, knowing full well that Anthony would be responsible for the rowdy boys. But tonight, Colin had been unusually late coming home. She could not help but entertain her growing unease. She did just get married to him. She would be really pissed if Colin ended up making her a widow so soon. 

She was about to call Kate when the doorbell rang. She answered the door promptly and was greeted at the sight of a disheveled Anthony keeping a drunk Colin upright. By the look of things, if she were to have taken her time from opening the door, Colin would have been sprawled on the ground, most likely pulling his brother with him. 

“Hey, Pen,” Anthony managed to say between grunts. He pulled on his brother, who was swaying dangerously on the spot. In his van behind him, Michael pressed on the car horn obnoxiously, to Anthony’s consternation. Benedict’s hoot and Philips yelp was very audible in her quiet neighborhood. Penelope would have to bake cookies again to appease her neighbors. 

“Fun night?” she asked with a laugh. She stepped up, anchoring her husband’s left arm over her shoulder. Colin, even in his drunken stupor, turned and bowed to the men in the car. He almost face-planted on the ground, if not for Anthony’s fast reflexes. 

The prominent vein on the left side of Anthony’s forehead was ticking dangerously. Penelope hid her giggle since he might go off any second. 

“Annoying gits,” Anthony mumbled as he shoved his brother into the house and into Penelope’s arms. “Always testing my patience. You got him, Pen?”

She nodded after hearing the car horn again. As much as she wanted him to help her with Colin upstairs, he needed to bring them home before her neighbors complained. She guided her husband to the stairs after saying, “Thanks Anthony. Close the door, will you?”

Her brother-in-law assented but added before rushing out, “Brunch tomorrow at mother’s, don’t forget!” 

“Got it!” she shouted as he shut the door close. “Alright, my love. Work with me,” she pleaded when she tried to get Colin up the stairs without any accidents. 

Colin shook his head, as if willing the booze away from his system, and took a good look at the stairs ahead of him. Then, he crouched down to all fours and slowly climbed up. Penelope was too flabbergasted to stop him. 

“Not what I have in mind, but I’ll take it,” she muttered as she followed him, making sure he did not make a misstep. 

He continued on until he reached the top. He stood up abruptly, with her guidance and made for their bedroom. Upon reaching the bed, Penelope stopped her husband from flopping onto the bed so she could take off his jacket, which reeked of booze. But before she could pull his sleeve off, he cut her off. 

“Excuse me, madam,” he slurred insistently, “I am a kept man. I do not care for your advances as I am very happily married.” 

Well, if that didn’t bring a bright smile on her face, she didn’t know what will. But she still needed to take off his jacket. “I just need to take off your jacket, love.” 

He acquiesced however, he refrained her from touching him with a light slap of her hand. He took it off easily then crashed head first on the bed.

Penelope was torn between annoyance and affection as she cradled the hand that he slapped away. In the end, she chose to linger on the fierce devotion he showed to her. She was successful in taking off both his shoes. When she was close to getting his socks off, he moved his feet out of reach. 

“No means no, lady,” he almost bellowed. “I’m married.”  

“So you kept saying,” she retorted as she chased his foot to pull on a sock. After a tedious minute, she was able to take it off and the other one too amidst his elaborate footwork dodges. She inhaled loudly, trying to be patient with her drunk husband. At this point, she may be okay with being a widow since she just might kill him herself.   

She sagged right next to him on the bed, her fatigue from the day catching up. She was ready to fall asleep when a scandalized, “Excuse me!”  prevented her from falling asleep. 

She scrunched her face and whispered to Colin, “You are really exhausting all my patience tonight, darling.” 

“I only sleep with my wife,” he insisted again, with a slur. “My Pen is the only one allowed to this,” he said as he gestured to his body. To his defense, it was a pretty tantalizing body. But she could not help but wonder if his brain was rendered useless with the alcohol in his tantalizing body.  

“Colin, just sleep, okay? I’m tired. You’re tired. Just go to sleep,” she appealed to him with wry fondness. She pulled on the comforter and tried to cover both their bodies with it. Unfortunately for her, he refused to cooperate. 

He fought off the comforter as if it were armed enemies, both his hands in a karate chop stance. 

“Colin! Just...oh my god,” she muttered under her breath. She’s never going to let him come back drunk ever again if he was going to be such a pain like this.

“My beautiful wife will have words with you, lady. Stop trying to molest me.” 

She wanted to strangle him but his compliment gave her pause. “Your wife must have the patience of a saint.” 

“My wife has everything,” he snootily replied. “She’s so witty and beautiful and insanely hot and funny and has the best rack,” his hands cupped the air daintily and she glowered at him, “and she’s sexy and she’s a great kisser and best of all, she’s mine.”

She wanted to wince. She honestly really hoped he didn’t talk about her breasts in public like this. But she would be lying if she denied being touched by his raining flattery. The muscles on her face tugged into a wide grin. 

“She should be lucky to have you. You’re not so bad yourself.” 

“I know I’m a catch,” her smile fell off, replaced by exasperation, “but my wife is leagues ahead of me. She’s the best. She’s absolutely, astoundingly gorgeous and that’s the least interesting thing about her. I’m awed that she chose me out of all the fools around her.” 

Well, shit. His words tugged into her heart, churning her insides into mush. Even the way he smiled dreamily as he went on and one about her sent her into a giddy rush. 

He continued, “I worship the ground she walked on. When she said she loved me, it felt like my life, only then, really started. Everything else was background noise. I’ll spend the rest of my life showing her how important she is to me. She is my dream fulfilled.”

Aww. This was better than his wedding vows. Her eyes misted as she tried to hide how touched she was at his drunken declaration. Penelope had to admit that drunk Colin was her favorite version of her husband. 

She leaned closer to him to give him a fervent kiss when his palm connected with her face. It wasn’t a slap, more of a forceful push. His outstretched hand pushed her away from his side. 

“God, lady, I just told you I’m married. I’m going to have to call the cops.”    

All of the goodwill she harbored from his flowery speech about her vanished. How could he use her face to push her entire body away from him? He’s definitely going to pay for this tomorrow. 

She left the bed at his unrelenting pushes. She grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and a bottle of aspirin. When she came back to their bedroom, he was fast asleep on his side of the bed. She placed the glass and medicine on his bed stand. 

He definitely was a handful but he was hers. 

She laid down on the bed, careful not to wake him from his slumber. It did not take her long to pass out in a dreamless sleep. 

She awoke to the glare of sunlight peeking from the drawn curtains a couple of hours later. She tried to rub her eyes but her arm was encumbered by her husband’s body. Colin, in his sleep, latched on to her side, curling his body flush to hers. She remembered his sweet words last night and grinned affectionately. However, she also remembered the way his hand connected with her face when she only wanted to give him a kiss. 

“Good morning!” she loudly exclaimed. 

Colin winced and cradled his head with a whine, “Why?”

His obvious pain was enough to balm the annoyance from last night. She ruffled his hair. “There’s water and aspirin there for you.” 

He mumbled his thanks and burrowed even deeper into the crook of her neck. She giggled when he peppered tiny kisses on her neck. 

“We have to be at your mom’s in a few hours. Think you’re up to it?”

He grunted a response, tightening his embrace on her. She reminded him of his mother’s special waffles and he seemed to be more amenable after. 

“I love you,” she told him, after a beat of silence, as she caressed his head.  

He peered at her. “I love you too. If I am to be greeted with this every morning after I get drunk, I’m drinking more often,” he answered with a joke. 

“Please don’t,” she asked with a glare.   

His face scrunched in confusion and all Penelope did was give her befuddled husband a sound kiss. 

#bridgerton #polin #penelope x colin #colin x penelope

[geo-winchester]

WAIT FOR IT

1. You had an assigned seat next to them at a wedding for a mutual friend.

NA: I know no body ask for it but when I saw that promp I have to do it and I also inspired a little on one episode of this is us, anyway I hope you like it and feed backs are very welcome.

Masterlist

—————

If someone asked Poe how much time does he been in his office, he wouldn’t know the answer, he was looking at some information about his work, but he gave up when he read the first word for the fifth time, it’s been almost a week since you and him decide to gave each other some time. He look at the pictures in front of him and smile, he thought that they were taken a long time ago, and now he was jealous of that man, from that man who look happy and the girl who was beside him love him unconditionally. He also start to remember how you end up together, after Poe’s services comes to an end he didn’t know what to do, he tried to get his own money by offers his services as a mechanic to his neighbors to earn a little more money, that’s how he end up fixing Mrs. Peabody’s car, the old lady pay him for take care of her late husband’s old car. Even if he need the money Poe didn’t have the courage of accepting her money, this time he spend most of his time under the car, his shirt end up with a big stain of oil, something he didn’t bother, he get out of the car when he heard Mrs. Peabody coming to him, the old lady smile at him and offer him a lemonade, he took it and place it on the table before he start to clean his hands.

-Is this old machine giving you a hard time?- the woman ask, he shook his head.

-Nothing I can’t deal with- he said with a smile -I just need to change the oil, and this beauty is ready to go- she giggle.

-You sound like my husband- she said -I swear to god, if he could he would end up married to this instead of me.

-I don’t thinks so Mrs. P, I bet that Mr. P was amaze by your beauty- he said making her blush.

-I keep wonder how you don’t have a girlfriend- he shrugged, she smile -Poe Can you do me a favor?

-Sorry Mrs. P but I ain’t going to accept any blind date- she rolled her eyes.

-Actually I was going to ask you to go with me to a party, is for a good cause, I bought two tickets and well I like you to come with me- the old lady smile.

-Mrs. P, You know I’m not good in that environment…

-Oh come on, your father always say how good of a dancer you are and maybe you doubt of it, but this old bones can dance- she said making him laugh, after a few minutes he sighed.

-At what time do I have to be there?

Poe remembered how he show up to the reception using one of his father’s suits, the ones he have were too small, he expect to meet Mrs. P sitting on the places they told him but instead he saw someone else, it was a young woman, around his age, you were talking to one of the other persons in the table, he had to admitted that in that moment he felt like everything around him stop and something inside him knew you were the one. When he stand next to you, you look at him confuse, but then something hit you.

-Oh god! I’m going to kill her- you said -Please tell me that my grandmother didn’t send you- he gave her a weak smile.

-She invited me, she said she need someone to dance- he said making you chuckle.

-And you believed her?- he shrugged -if you want to go, it’s ok, I’ll tell her that you were a nice guy but we weren’t meant to be- you expect him to leave but instead he sat next to you and smiled, you were amaze of how easy was to talk to him, he was a very good listener but there were a moment when you realize that you were talking a lot, you giggle -Sorry, sometimes I get excited and forgot that the other person want to talk too, sometimes my mother said that I get too excited about music that I forgot to listen.

-I think it’s wonderful, not many people found something that gave them passion- he said making you smiled.

-And what about you? Tell me something about you.

-Well… my name is Poe, I don’t know if you knew it but I fix your grandfather’s car- she nod -I don’t know there’s not much to tell about me, I came back from my service a few months ago, I move to a little apartment and I’m trying to figure it out whats my next step- you nod.

-Is there something you like?

-I was a pilot on my unit, I always love to be on the sky but lately I… don’t know- he look at the other side of the room -Do you want to go somewhere else?- You look at him with surprise.

-I’m not one of those girls- you saw how the colors of his face changed making you laugh -what do you have in mind?

Poe remember that night as if he was yesterday, it was the worst first date he had, in that time he didn’t have a lot of money so he thought that maybe it would be fun to go to the carnaval, but he didn’t expect that it was more expensive as he remember, after he buy the tickets and some snacks for them he just left with enough money for a few games or rides but everything screw up when the rain started, he hasn’t enough money for an umbrella so you had to stay under a roof for an hour, he thought that his story was over in that moment, he remember how awful he feel when you got back home but for some miracle you talk a little more and you end up singing on his car. He came back from his memories when his father came in, he act like if he was searching for something, but Poe knew he didn’t came just for a few papers.

-So… are you going to spend another week with me or are you going to fix things with your wife?- his father asked him.

-I don’t know if she want that?

-Why don’t you asked her?- Poe didn’t answer, he just look at the window.

-She didn’t have to say it, she was the one who told me to gave her space…- he stand up and walk to the window -She said that she thought that I didn’t love her anymore- his father step close to him, they saw how you came to his business with your kids, and the moment he saw your smile, he thought that the time get back to the first time he saw you.

-I remember those eyes- his father said, he look at him confused -that’s the same look you had the night you meet her, you came back home and told me “I just met the girl I want to spend the rest of my life

-She’s still that girl- he said.

-Then do something about it- he get out of his office and greet his grandchildren, Poe sighed before he sit back in back from his desk, a few minutes later someone nock on his door, when you open it, he look at you in surprise, she giggles.

-Your father told me that you want to talk to me, but by the look of your face I think you didn’t send him- you said -God what is it with the people around us making plans for us?- both of you laugh.

-I think they just try to help- she nod with a smile, both of them stay silence for a moment just looking at each other- are…- both of them smile as they try to speak at the same time -You first.

-I just want to asked you how you been.

-Oh, I been fine- he said with a weak smile.

-So… now is your turn to say what you were to say- he thought for a moment but he didn’t say anything, you nod and chuckle -Why am I bother to come here?

-What do you mean?

-I mean that you always do this- you chuckle - you know what when your dad told me you want to talk to me I say to myself “Hey maybe he want to knows whats going on and try to fix it” but I was wrong, i gave your father the backpack with the kids clothes for tonight, try at least to put attention to them- she walk to the door.

After you walk away from his office he couldn’t stop thinking about you and all the time you spend together, as he look at your kids he could see the perfect combination between the two of them, he remember all the laughs, all the jokes and the touches, and then he start to realize that you were right, he start to focus on his work a lot, start to be absent in your kids life and getting away from you, and that kill him. After he put the kids on his old bed he couldn’t help it anymore, he need to fix his life no matter what, and for his lucky the rain start to fall and it become harder and harder. He was completely soak when he start to knock on your door.

-Poe.. what…

-I’m sorry, you were right, I lost my path, and i screw it up- he said, she look at him for a minute.

-Come in, you’ll catch a cold if you keep that cloth- You gave him one of his pijama, you didn’t know why you were sitting on the hall, he was looking at your kid’s room.

-Do you remember when we bought this house?- he said -the look on your face when you saw it for the first time- he start to laugh, something you miss.

-Well you brought me here when it wasn’t fished- she smiled -But then you start to talk about how it going to look and how our kids can play, I imagined it all.

-Our life were as good as you imagined?

-Yes, even better- he nodded.

-What happened to us?

-I don’t know, I think we get used to each other and… I start to think that you didn’t love me anymore- she look away, he took her chin making her look at him.

-Hey never think that, I’m an asshole for let you think that, but I love you, I love the way you treat our kids and the way you change your hair…

-I thought you didn’t notice- you said.

-of course I did, I notice every change in you, I memorize everything but for me you still that girl her grandmother set us up- he said making you laugh.

-And you still that boy who gave me the worst date of my life…

-It was pretty awful- he said laughing -I thought you never going to talk to me again.

-I thought about it, but the way you look at me that night…

-I knew if you were the girl for me- she smile before she kiss him -I have to thank your grandmother again -He said making you laugh -I love you Mrs. Dameron.

-I love you Mr. Dameron- you rest your head on his shoulder as he start to hum the same song you sing to him all those years ago.

#poe dameron x reader #poe dameron imagine #poe x reader #poe dameron #oscar isaac imagine #oscar isaac

[heathenarmyimagines]

Title: Find Us

Summary: (Y/N)’s sleep study goes horribly wrong.

Pairing: Ivar x Reader

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six, Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine

Taglist: @ubbesgirl, @shewolf2000, @tis-itheapplepie, @atequila, @demoncrypt1066, @greennightspider, @badbitsh13, @fireismysaftey, @minarawr, @laketaj24, @hvitserksgirl, @blahblahcookiesdoma, @fabulous-peasent, @sforsammmmmi, @minmiin1d, @courtrae89, @letsloveimagines, @tomarisela, @titty-teetee, @beyond-the-ashes@elenawrit, @mblaqgi, @whenimaunicorn, @chuflisworld, @mystruggledlife, @moose-squirrel-asstiel, @syreni-dea, @trashqueenbitch, @alykatv, @mbaku-babygirl, @perfectus-in-morte, @beyond-the-ashes, @neeadinghugs, @readsalot73, @triumphantreturnofpies, @anarchy-is-coming, @tephi101, @alicedopey, @ivarslittlebadgirl, @jtrstp, @nejijjeoroo, @charlylama, @ivartheblessed, @captstefanbrandt, @fabulouschrissi, @ivarsrideordie, @3x5gurl, @the-writer-appreciation-blog, @lolabee9, @captainfoxy22, @young-ugly-god, @im5ftbutmythroat66, @bribyyy, @irishhiggins, @cadetomlinson, @keclleon101, @slutforragnarssons, @ltkeke, @meeeeeeeeeps, @lille-kanin, @opalscarab, @ssraven7, @ivarandersen, @concretewaywardangel, @funmadnessandbadassvikings, @sharon-is-tired, @cadetomlinson, @mystruggledlife, @chuflisworld, @justmarissa97, @lol-haha-joke, @weirdly-randomly-awesome, @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanim, @idonthavehusbandsihavelovers, @alexa040004, @buckythetinman , @burntmythroatskullingmytea,@jorunnravenslayer, @two-unbeatable-beaters, @buffy-the-vampire-blogger, @arses21434, @ltkeke, @captainfoxy22, @chinduda @letsshamelessqueen-m @my-soul-is-the-moon @we-are-transcendent

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six,Part Seven, Part Eight, Part Nine

Sitting at the table you had continued the research you had begun the day before, you had been knee deep in articles since you had sent your sibling off to school that morning and it was almost time for them to get out.

Not that they would be coming back home after school; your mother had to stay on location for a few days and for tonight you couldn’t hold down the fort because you had your own appointment.

Dr. Finehair said he had a specialist come in to conduct a sleep study to see if maybe it was a brainwave disturbance causing your sleeping problems and he wanted you to try and sleep as long as you could.

Without meaning to you had let your mind wander back to your phone call with Ivar yesterday.

After you hung up you spared a moment to think about how abruptly Ivar decided to end the call, it seemed like something was wrong with him.

You figured he would tell you when he felt the need to talk about it, so you went back to your research on Ivar the Boneless.

History was one of your favorite subjects because it’s like a story that really happened once upon a dark and twisted time.

The more you read the more you wanted to put it all aside and never look at it again, which was odd for you. Normally you loved the dark part of history, you believed that no country can ever grow without looking back at its history.

American history was your usual topic but this was a completely new ballpark, and Ivar the Boneless didn’t really feel like light reading. Especially when you couldn’t help but picture your best friend performing a Blood Eagle in order to avenge his father.

His father was another matter that needed researching, you had to look into as much as you could. Any small piece of information could be vital to figuring out this whole thing.

Whatever this thing was.

Your stomach growled and snapped you out of your own head, you sat aside your laptop and stretched before you stood up from your kitchen table.

The kitchen window gave your neighbor a good enough view that she could just walk by and see that you weren’t sleeping.

It didn’t surprise you that your mother didn’t trust you to stay awake on your own accord, because you also didn’t trust yourself to not take a nap.

God you needed a nap.

With a sigh you went and made yourself a quick bowl of ramen to ease your hunger without overfilling yourself.

It was about an hour before Ivar would be released.

He was going to drive you to the hospital and wait for you, meaning he would sleep in an uncomfortable waiting room or even worse his truck. It felt odd that he would do that for you, and even though you had asked him to, you thought he’d decline.

Suddenly your phone chimed with a message.

I’m leaving early be there in ten - Ivar

Cool, we can just chill until it’s time to go - (Y/N)

You looked at the phone and couldn’t help but second guess if that message was good enough, or if you should have added any emojis.

Ugh, this was not good, how could you have suddenly developed feelings for him; Ivar of all people. The guy you were trying to get to remember his past life.

A life in which he was married to you while being old enough to be your grandfather.

You groaned in mild annoyance and complete confusion as you went upstairs to change out of the pajamas you had been lounging in.

The minutes passed like seconds and soon Ivar was at your door.

Fighting the urge to double check yourself in the mirror you went downstairs to let him in.

‘Hey, I got your schoolwork.’ he said handing you a folder.

‘Boo.’ you whined as you looked at the assignments.

‘You’re welcome, not like I went out of my way to get them for you or anything.’ Ivar sassed.

‘Thank you, think you can help me with this...I hate math.’

‘I know, sure I’ll help.’

You led him to the kitchen and subtly motioned to the open window and waved at your neighbor who waved back.

The older woman looked at Ivar in confusion and Ivar waved politely before he sat at your table.

‘So are we starting with math first?’

‘Hell no, tell me about the man with no eyes.’ you said bluntly.

‘I don’t know much, man doesn’t like being in the public eye. Got rich through genius investments but he seems to come from old money despite the fact that no information on his family is available. My father said he was one of his first clients.

‘So it's not like he just time traveled to get here, he’s well established. Covered in mystery but still real, does that mean he’s been alive this whole time?’ you asked.

‘I would guess so but that doesn’t seem humanly possible.’ Ivar said back.

‘Maybe he isn’t human then, at this point we can’t afford to think too logically anymore, the new motto is if we can explain it then we can accept it.’

‘Inspirational.’ he hummed.

‘Thank you, I’m truly a poetic soul.’ you joked.

‘Yeah... there is more though, he knew too much.’

That got your attention, not because of what Ivar had said but the way he said it, like he wasn’t talking about something he’d experienced. It was as if he was talking about someone else he didn’t know.

‘What do you mean?’

‘He knew about my family, but it didn’t feel like he looked us up. He just...knew too much.’ Ivar tried to clarify.

‘What did he know?’

‘Dad was introducing us and he said this wasn’t all us...he knew two of us weren’t there and he was right. Bjorn wasn’t there and he knew about Gida...almost no one knows about Gida, Dad never talks about her except on her birthday.’

‘Who is Gida?’ you asked.

‘My sister, well half sister if you want to be politically correct. My dad’s first wife had two kids Bjorn and Gida, when his first company was just becoming successful he had to leave town a lot and on one trip he was told Gida had died of influenza.’

‘Oh my God, I’m sorry.’ you said sympathetically.

‘It’s ok, she died way before I was born, I’ve only seen a few pictures but I don’t know anything about her, but that guy did. He knew that none of us ever saw her and he knew she was sick, and I could tell that dad was surprised by him knowing.’

Now Ivar was looking off into the distance as if he himself wasn’t even here sitting at your table right now. It was as if he was mentally somewhere else, probably trying to come up with a scenario where his father would have talked about this girl named Gida.

‘Hey, calm down. We can put a pin in it for right now if you want to, I actually do need to get some of my homework done.’ you tried to comfort.

Ivar nodded and took in a deep breath and let it all out.

You actually managed to put most of your focus on stupid equations that no one would ever need in real life, but you couldn’t help but think about how hard this was all becoming now.

Ivar was in complete denial of who he must have been in his past life, anytime you brought it up he shuts down or starts bleeding. How much more proof did he need and what will he do when he can’t deny it any more?

By some miracle you finished all your assignments with mild confidence that it was at least a B+, Ivar was apparently putting all his focus on helping you.

Pretty soon it was time for the two of you to head out if you wanted to get to the hospital in time for your appointment.

The ride was uneventful, just casual talk about school and plans for next weekend; pretty much you talked about anything but the elephant in the room.

While you rode you were very proud of yourself for keeping things casual. It was as if you had pushed aside that mild panic you felt about the possibility of you having a crush on the guy next to you.

At the hospital you filled out some papers while Ivar was chatting with the lady at the desk, it was the same one from your first visit.

Her name was Helga, she was a blond woman who looked no older than twenty seven tops, but she spoke to Ivar as if she were an forty year old aunt.

‘Are you her ride home? She could be here for a while, your mother will worry.’ Helga asked.

‘Mother always does, I let her know I’d be home late if it makes you feel better.’ he assured.

‘It doesn’t.’

You felt kinda awkward interrupting to let her know you were done with the papers.

She took them and led you into an examination room where a male nurse took your vitals and gave you a gown to wear.

After a minute Dr. Finehair came in with another doctor who you had to assume was the specialist who would be conducting the study.

‘Hello Ms. (Y/N), I’m Dr. Finehair.’

You made a confused face and sent a looked between the two men.

‘My little brother, if it helps you can call him Halfdan.’ your doctor explained.

‘Don’t worry the smarter one is in charge.’ Halfdan smiled politely.

It was strange how easily his charm seemed to relax you, but you guessed as a doctor he had to have amazing bedside manners.

‘I’ve looked over all of your test results and it seems to be nothing physically with your body, other than what could be expected from an exhausted teenager.’ he said as he began placing little stickers on your temples, scalp face, chest and legs.

Both doctors were very nice and the small talk did help to pass the time while Halfdan was placing sensors on your body.

‘The main purpose of the study is to see what your brainwaves are up to when you go to sleep. If there is anything unusual then we can know what to focus on and see what tests need to be run on you. OK?’ he explained.

‘I understand, how long do I need to sleep?’

‘As long as you can, did you need any sleeping aids, I see it’s been prescribed to you.’

‘Not necessary, I’m ready to crash whenever you give me the go ahead Doc.’ you smiled.

‘Oh well don’t let me stop you, we are going to leave the room, the sensors are connected to a machine, we will monitor the room as well record video.’

‘What if I have to use the restroom? I guess I should have asked before you started.’

‘It is fine, we can disconnect you, all you have to do is let us know.’

‘Alright you are all set to go, we will leave you to it ma’am.’

The two men left and it only took you about thirty seconds to go to sleep.

******************************************************************* Ivar’s POV

The hospital was unusually quiet today, not empty by any means, but it seemed nothing horribly urgent had happened since he’d gotten here.

Every person that came in was calm and in good enough shape to explain why they were here and what they were feeling.

Of course that would be expected because this hospital was a bit out of the way, too far from the busy highways where most car accidents tend to happen.

There was also the fact that this was a very expensive hospital, with amazing security, top of the line technology and the best doctors you can get.

All of his surgeries had been done here, because on top of all those other great qualities this hospital assured each patient complete privacy. No matter who the patient was or how much money their secrets were worth.

Ivar was sitting there, in one of the uncommonly comfortable waiting room chairs, scrolling through social media on his phone when a sudden wave of lightheadedness hit him.

His vision blurred to the point where he had to sit his phone aside and shake his head in an effort to clear his head.

‘I see you Boneless.’

Ivar flinched at the sudden voice, but more than that he flinched at the name.

He looked up and what he saw was impossible, so very impossible that even the thought of it made him think that he was going mad.

There is no other explanation for what was sitting in the chair across from him.

It was himself.

His own face, slightly hidden behind a thick and graying beard, but all the same it was obviously his face. His eyes, nose and teeth...his face.

‘No.’ he breathed.

‘But yes, you wouldn’t believe what all had to be sacrificed for us to chat, and I’m sad to say that my being here is not good news.’

‘You aren’t here.’ Ivar whispered.

‘No, not really; neither are you, not completely. Neither of us can ever truly be anywhere until we are together. Until you accept that you are me, I did my part; I died...and I waited.’

‘Waited for what? For two teenagers to meet to clean up a mess you made thousands of years ago?’ he snapped angrily, barely managing to keep his voice down.

‘I didn’t want to do this, I saw no point in it. I was fully prepared to accept the punishment the Gods felt I deserved, but it wasn’t just me...and it isn’t just you. Everyone you love and care about, they are all being punished for my deeds, our deeds.’

‘Your deeds.’ Ivar spat.

‘Our...deeds.’

‘Ivar.’

This time Ivar jumped clean out of his chair, partially due to being so suddenly startled but mostly to look away from this thing with his face.

Herald was there and just the look on his face told him something was wrong; horribly wrong.

‘What happened?’

‘Helga is calling her mother now, Ivar I need you to be calm. I can see how much you care for her and I know you will worry, but losing your composure won’t help anything do you understand?’ Herald said seriously.

‘Tell me what happened.’ Ivar repeated quietly, almost certain he didn’t want the answer but he needed it all the same.

‘(Y/N) is brain dead.’

‘What? She was just here for a sleep study. What the hell happened?!’ Ivar hissed.

The hairs on the back of his neck was standing up and he couldn’t think of a time where he had been this scared.

‘We don’t know. I wouldn’t even be saying any of this to you if her mother hadn’t listed you as one of (Y/N)’s emergency contacts.’

‘Tell me!’ Ivar snapped.

Herald sighed in mild annoyance but his look remained professional.

‘Her vitals were excellent, no sleep aids were administered. Neither me or Halfdan can explain what happened, I was monitoring her on camera and he was watching her brainwaves. Out of nowhere the waves flat-line and she is seizing up.’

‘She had a seizure?’

‘Yes. A non epileptic seizure, but a seizure nonetheless; we had to risk sedating her before she hurt herself. I wish I could tell you something, anything to explain what went wrong, but I don’t know. I checked her for every physical condition I can think of as a medical doctor and there is nothing to see.’

Ivar was speechless, he didn’t know what to say, even if he did he wouldn’t trust his voice to say it without breaking.

‘When her mother arrives I will explain it to her and what happens next will be her decision.’

‘Can I see her?’ he asked softly.

‘Yes, but do not move her. We are not sure what is causing the problem and we won’t know until we can get her in a CAT scan.’

‘CAT scans, do you think it’s cancer?’ Ivar asked, his eyes wide and his heart filled with dread.

‘I can not say, even suggesting it with no test done I could lose my license. For right now I need you to keep calm while we try to figure out what exactly is happening.’

Ivar nodded in understanding, he listened to the room number and made his way there; all the while thinking about everything.

He thought about the imaginary creature that spoke to him in the waiting room.

“My being here is not good news” that’s what he said and he was right.

He remembered when he had first met her in the hallway; he couldn’t stop thinking about her in class, when he saw her at the table with his brothers he was happy to see her. Even happier that he liked her and saw her as a great friend.

A friend was something he’d never had before and he had thought this was why he wanted to keep her so close, but it wasn’t.

Ivar knew that now, he wouldn’t be this worried and concerned for a friend.

He loved (Y/N), he loved her and right now she was brain dead because of the actions of a dead man.

Because of his actions.

#ivar the boneless #ivar x reader #ivar lothbrok #ivar ragnarson #ivar imagine #modern!vikings #vinkings #vikings imagine #Find us Series #find us

[spideyanakin]

Dead Poets Society (Chapter 2)

Tom Holland x Reader

Synopsis - 1959, your grandfather being the headmaster of Welton Academy - an all boys Boarding School, wanted you close to him after your parents death. Forcing you to join beyond any rules to be a student there. Despite strict rules you still fell in love with one. But Tom seems to be loosing the will to live when his strict family forces their wishes on him. Can one amazing teacher change your lives forever?

Series Masterlist 🍓

Normal Masterlist 🧚🏼‍♀️

Chapter 2 - Carpe Diem

September 15

The year wasn’t so boring after all.

“What do you mean you went to see her at her school?” You stopped Sam as he darted from Tom’s room to his.

“An angel.” He grinned as he planted himself in front of you with a dreamy look in his eyes. “Love of my life.” He mumbled making you smile.

“Well, what did she say?” You bounced on your heels in anticipation.

“I don’t know.” He looked away and then back to you. “I didn’t talk to her.”

“What do you mean you didn’t talk to her!?” you punched his chest with the back of your hand, hating the ending of his story. “Why!?”

“Her boyfriend...” He slumped his shoulder and walked back to his dorm, lightly slamming the door behind him. As if on cue your own boyfriend arrived in a fury running in the hallway like a mad man.

“I found what I truly want to do!” He looked into your eyes before shoving a piece of paper into your hands.

“A Midsummer night's dream?” You raised an eyebrow as you watched him jump up and down on his bed. You shared a concerning look with Harrison. “What does it have to do with you?” You fought back a smile.

“They’re putting it on a Kingston Hall.” He replied/scream earning raised eyebrows. “Open Tryouts! OPEN TRYOUTS!” He shouted turning to you and moving his hands towards you like he wanted to just grab your face and kiss you but couldn’t. He huffed in frustration and made a full circle.

“I’m going to act!” He smiled with a dreamy look in his eyes. “YES! YES! I’m gonna be an actor!” You watched your boyfriend as his eyes filled with sparks. “I wanted to try this forever but my father wouldn’t let me!”

“Yeah, I remember when you wanted to try for the summer play last year.” You smiled in admiration, leaning on his doorway.

He looked at you like the world couldn’t get any better “For the first time in my whole life, I know what I wanna do. AND IM GOING TO DO IT! CAARRPEE DIEEEEEAM!” He screamed with a chuckle.

“Tom, hold on. What if your father finds out?” Harrison broke in.

“To hell with him!” You giggled, happy to see Tom happy.

“Yes.” He turned to you and huffed a laugh. “He won’t. First I need to get the part and then I can worry about him finding out.” He looked at you and smiled again. “If I don’t ask him, at least I won’t be disobeying him.”

“I’m happy for you.” you reached for him and squeezed his shoulder, the contact being short but sending shivers down both your bodies.

“No touching!” Harrison joked imitating your grandfather’s voice. You scrunched up your nose.

“Ew. Don’t do that again, Haz.”

September 28

“When are you getting the audition results?” You asked Tom as Sam took Harry's place in the middle of the circle.

“Next week.” He whispered back.

“My actor.” You ruffled his hair before pressing a kiss to his lips.

Sam cleared his throat when the kiss wouldn't stop. You both blushed with a light chuckle, resting your head on his shoulder to look at Sam who was ready to say his poem.

“Now" He stretched his arms and cracked his knuckles. "In honor of my love for Chris.”

"Who I still haven't met by the way?" You raised an eyebrow. "I need to check if she's worthy of you."

"You'll meet her soon enough." He chuckled. "Anyways, I have prepared a poem.”

“Like the one you wrote for class?” Harry grinned.

“No.” Sam deadpanned before clearing his throat again, straightening himself, and opening the book of verse. “This one is from Romeo and Juliet.” He gave Harry a death glare.

“Well, c’mon do your poem.” You grinned, Tom wrapping his hand a little tighter around your waist.

“But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Chris is the sun.” Everyone laughed at the name change, the vibration of Tom’s laughter making your heart skip a beat. “Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, Who is already sick and pale with grief, That thou her maid art far more fair than she:”

You thought for a second as you heard Sam’s words. You lifted your stare to look at Tom. You couldn’t help but stare at him as the words of love escaped your friend's mouth. You loved Tom more than anything in the whole wide world, and nothing could alter that.

Right here, at that moment, you knew he was the one you were meant to spend the rest of your life with. The one you wanted to spend the rest of your life with.

“Wait a minute.” Harry broke Sam’s speech as he watched you look at Tom with a love-struck expression. “Didn’t Romeo and Juliet get married like the second they met?” His lips broke into a grin.

“Yeah. They fell in love and got married right away. Why?” you replied.

“You two should get married.”

“What?” Both you and Tom turned your full attention to Harry who couldn’t stop smiling at the idea.

“It would be just the poets. There’s a village far enough they won’t know who we are, but close enough we can go by bike right now and come back before curfew. It's Saturday who cares if we leave campus? They have this beautiful little chapel. You guys should do it! Carpe Diem right?”

You blinked as his words soaked it.

“Make this Romeo and Juliet but without the death! Write your own story! Seize the goddamn day! Carpe Diem for Christ sakes” He continued. “The two of you love each other so much you would get married someday anyway!” You cheeks flushed at that comment. “Why not do it now!?” He aggressively banged his hands together to make his point.

You turned to look at Tom, he met your eyes for a slight second before turning towards Sam. “Give me the book.” He waved his hand and Sam handed it to him.

“What’s your favorite poem again? Some with the sea?” You didn’t understand what he was doing but you replied anyway.

“Yeah, Out of the rolling ocean the crow by Whitman. Why?” You looked at him while he flipped through the pages. “I think it’s page 289.”

Tom took your word and went to page 289 - indeed seeing the poem.

“Does anyone have a quill?” Everyone’s stare was glued to Tom who looked in a hurry. Harrison handed him his and Tom scribbled something on the neighboring page before ripping out the one with your poem on it.

“Tom, what the heck?” Instead of answering you, he stood up and walked to the other corner of the cave turning his back to everyone.

“Sam, will you help me with this?” Sam awkwardly nodded before trotting towards Tom.

Harry took the book from the floor and read what was scribbled. ‘Sorry if this page is missing, I needed something to propose the love of my life with.’ Harry shook his head and smiled.

“You son of a bitch” He chuckled and you looked at Harry in confusion. Before you could even grab the book and read it for yourself Tom turned around and stared down at you.

“Stand up.” He asked and you followed orders, dusting some dirt off your pants when you did. You looked at him up and down and noticed he was hiding the paper behind his back. “Y/n?” His soft tone echoed through the cave. All the boys stayed silent as they carefully listened.

“Yeah?” He took one of your hands in his free one, still locking eyes with you. He slowly got down on one knee and that’s when you realized what he was doing. The page was folded into a ring. 

He looked up to you with hope-filled eyes and started speaking again.

“To the one who took my heart,

I have loved you ever since I saw you,

as my love for you is as boundless as is It true.

Heaven is where you and I kiss each other,

So will you marry me?

And if you do agree,

I will be yours forever,

Dead Poet’s Honor.”

He squeezed your hand as he waited for your answer.

You took a second to really look at him. Taking in the sight of the love of your life. He looked gorgeous in the light of the moon. His messy hair and brown eyes sparkling. You thought about how literally 2 minutes ago you thought about the answer to that question and a huge smile painted your lips. You nodded as happy tears started coming to your eyes.

“Yes.” You blurt out jumping into his arms. “Yes, yes, yes, yes.” You cried as you attacked him with kisses. He wrapped his arms around your waist as you did, taking in every second of happiness that this moment was bringing him.

“I love you so much.” He smiled before you crashed your lips to his again, smiling into the kiss.

He suddenly pulled away and grabbed your left hand, placing the poem ring on your finger. The whole cave echoed in claps and cheers worst than the time you had told Tom you loved him back, and the whole group started patting your backs.

Harry looked at his watch. "C'mon guys let's go!" He yawped with joy.

Tom locked your lips with his before picking you up bridal style. The cave still rang with chants and claps, and they didn't die out as you made your way back towards the campus.

He dropped you once you were back, and you all sprinted towards your bikes.

You all took random ones, Paddy almost tripping on one as the hurry got to him. You all started heading towards the road until an idea popped into your mind.

"Wait." you were almost out of the school's territory before you dropped your bike and sprinted towards the headmaster's house that was just near the perimeter.

They all watched you as you disappeared in between the trees, getting a glimpse of you when you climbed your window and stepped into your room.

You caught your breath before walking towards your closet, grabbing a chair on the way. You couldn’t remove the smile off your lips as you climbed on it and pushed out of the top shelf the huge Louis Vuitton Malle where all your mother's best belongings had been stored.

You opened it, taking in your mother's scent. It brought a sudden wave of nostalgia towards you as you sat on the floor and removed old photos that rested on top. You laid them on the floor of your room as you searched for the piece of clothing you wanted. You smiled when you saw the picture of your parents’ wedding that sat on a beautiful soft silk fabric.

You removed the picture, smiling when you saw it. The smile on your mother’s and father's face brought a feeling of pure happiness inside you. A sudden thought passed through you - you were going to get to live that happiness right now, with Tom.

That’s when you realized. Pictures. You at least needed someone to take pictures.

You jumped up and walked back towards your closet, fumbling with a few things before finally getting your hands on a camera. You dusted the lens and tried a picture, smiling when it got out in perfect condition. You got all your recharges and put them in your duffle bag along with the camera itself.

You walked back to the suitcase. Removed a few pouches, opening them to reveal the most beautiful pieces of jewelry. You’d just have to pick your favorite.

Finally, your hand landed on what you wanted.

The silky dress that was under the wedding picture. Your mother’s wedding dress. It was a simple dress but it was still the most beautiful one you had seen. You unfolded it and admired the hand-sewn details.

You didn't care if it fitted, but you packed it. You played around with all your jewelry collection until you made the perfect match. A necklace, pearl earrings, a beautiful shiny bracelet, and pretty hair clips. You even grabbed a bracelet that use to be your father’s for Tom.

You placed everything back in the Malle, and that’s when you realized there was something glued to the back of the wedding picture.

A transparent bag with two wedding rings. You didn’t think twice before taking them.

Your heart pounded with anticipation, a shiver of excitement passing through you when you jumped with the duffle bag on your shoulder, landing on the soft grass and running back towards the waiting boys.

“What's that future Mrs. Holland?” Tom wondered when he saw the bag over your shoulder, stealing you a kiss before you mounted your bike again.  

"Something - A surprise." He liked the sparkle in your eyes when you said it.

"And where's Harry?"

"He left too - said he needed to grab something."

“I can’t believe the two of you are getting married” Harrison grinned. "What would his parents and your grandpa said if they knew?” He let out a chuckle of disbelief.

“They won't” You bit your lip fighting back a smile. “We’ll make sure of that.” You nodded and looked left to see Tom staring back.

"I'm here!" Harry screamed sprinting towards you with his bag going up and down.

"What's this?" Paddy raised an eyebrow.

"You'll see."

An hour later and you all parked your bikes behind a beautiful little white stone Chapelle. You smiled, gripping the handle of your bag a little tighter.

“Wait, before we go in!” You zipped your bag open and fished out your camera. Waving it towards the boys.

“You’re a genius.” Harry’s face lit up.

“I brought enough recharges to make at least 60 photos.” You grinned as you showed them some picture paper packets.

Harry took the camera from you. “C’mon guys.” He waved for you to come into a group, Tom didn’t hesitate to wrap his arm around your waist as you did. Harry clicked a few selfie-like pictures, one with you and Tom kissing as they all made disgusted faces, another one where you all did funny faces, and a more serious one with a few smiles.

You took a second to look at the Chapelle. It was a beautiful place. It was very small like it could host a max of 20 people and the outside walls were full of flowers and leaves that had climbed all the way up the roof.

“Shall we?” You wondered, sharing a smile with Tom that made your cheeks warm up. You walked inside, and the calmness of the place brought a certain feeling of peace inside, easing all your nerves at once.

A priest was standing at the other end, fumbling with something.

“How can I help you?” He wondered when he lifted his head to see a group of 6 teens staring at him.

“Yes.” You took a step forward. “We’d like to have a wedding. Right now if it’s possible.”

“A wedding?” He looked at you for a second, his stare shifting to yours and Tom's intertwined hands “I assume it’s the two of you?” You nodded. 

“Aren’t you a little too young?” He wondered at loud and quickly realized with the look in everyone's eyes that there was no arguing. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes.” You squeezed Tom’s hand.

“Alright.” He shrugged and turned to his altar. “Do you guys at least have better clothes? Or will you get married in those school uniforms?” He wondered with a chuckle.

"I do." You unshoulder your bag.

"And I got this for you." Harry gave his bag to Tom. "I couldn't let you get married in these ugly, lives threatening clothes now could I?"

~

“Harry?” You opened the back door of the chappel only to reveal your head.

Tom was changing behind a screen and the priest was starting some preparations around the altar.

There was no one but trees for kilometers away, so you weren't scared to get changed outside.

“Yeah?” He wondered as he met your eyes

“Could you come here for a second?” you asked and Harry looked around, confusion written all over his eyes. When you didn’t get a response you continued. “I promise I’m decent.” You chuckled. “I just need to ask you something.”

Harry shuffled with his Welton tie as he trotted towards you. You opened the door, staying behind it until you closed it. He moved his head up to see you - freezing when he took in your appearance.

You had untied and brushed your hair, it fell perfectly around your face, making you look like a goddess. You were personally surprised the dress fitted so well. It hugged every part of your body perfectly. The skirt was loose but the top part hugged your stomach and chest. The short sleeves fitted perfectly and the way it looked on you made you smile. It was meant to be.

Harry continued scanning your beautiful figure as the jewels perfectly reflected on your skin. He had never seen you like this - he felt his jaw drop.

“First, will you help with the buttons?” You wondered as you turned around taking your hair in your hands, making sure it wouldn’t get in the way. Harry nodded, feeling every word stuck in the back of his throat. You chuckled at his silence.

“You- you look beautiful.” He mumbled when you turned around.

“Thank you. Now I have something to ask you.” You looked into his eyes, a pause falling as he waited for your question. “Will you give me away?”

“Oh wow." His eyes lit up when he realized what you were asking. "I would love to!”

“Thank you.” You brought him into a tight hug. “This means a lot.” You let out a wobbly sigh into his arms.

“Don’t worry it’s normal.” He smiled awkwardly patting your shoulder. “You’re my best friend Y/n/n - I’m not going to let you walk down the aisle alone.” He scoffed like it would be an insult to let you do that.

“Also.” You pulled away from the hug and got something from your bag. “I found this in my mother's things. If you could give it to the priest.” Harry’s face lit up when he saw the rings.

“I knew we were missing something” He clicked his tongue with a smirk. “This is going to be amazing.” He shook his head.

“Tell me about it.”

~

“Nervous?” Harry wondered as you blew an agitated breath, holding on tight to a small bouquet of wildflowers.

“A little.” You smiled. “Excited nervous.” You looked at the Chapelle doors.

You were all ready and Tom was on the other end of the aisle, waiting for you - with all the boys sitting on the edge of their seats in the front row.

Sam had the camera lens locked on Tom’s face eagerly waiting to capture his face when you entered.

“Alright.” You smiled and Harry folded his arm so you could hold it. “Let’s do this.”

The air got sucked out of your lungs right there. You looked down the aisle to meet Tom’s eyes. He did indeed clean himself up as Harry asked.

He looked beautiful, in a suit you had probably never seen him wear before. His hair might have still been ruffled from the bike ride but that didn’t make him look any less godly. Candles reflected in his eyes making them look like pretty pools of honey.

You could just stare at him all day - and it took everything in you to remember how to walk.

Tom could say the same thing. All the sudden he forgot how to breathe. He had never seen you in a dress before and you looked like the way people say Aphrodite look like.

All the boys were starstruck by you - envying Tom but without an ounce of jealousy in them. 

Harry gave you a quick kiss on the cheek as you let go of his arm. You stepped up and met Tom’s eyes from close. You could bet he was on the edge of tearing up - and so were you.

You reached for Tom’s hand you felt sparks fly when they met. As if it was the very first time you had ever held him. His skin felt warm on yours and you never wanted to let go.

The priests said a bunch of random words but you were too focused on looking at Tom to hear them - so was Tom. He couldn’t stop staring and you and both of you blushed under each other's glances.

“Does anybody oppose?” Sam stood up and you and Tom’s heart went at lightning speed. All the boys looked at him like he was a mad man.

He cleared his throat. “I don’t actually oppose.” He gave a sheepish smile when he saw the weird look everyone was giving him. Everyone blew a thankful breath.

“I just- I wanted to say that I’ve never seen any two people who love each other the way these two do, Dead Poets Honor.” He put a hand over his heart “Even my parents don’t have the same look in their eyes. I love you both of you so much and I'm so happy you found each other. And I hope that someday Chris will look at me the way you look at Tom.” You puffed out a teary chuckle.

You wiped your eyes at his words and so did Harry and Paddy who nodded along - emotions catching up with everyone. You mumbled a thank you before bringing your stare back to your fiance.

“Well, thank you for that gentlemen. Now,” He turned his stare back to you and your husband to be. “Tom Holland, do you take-”

“Yes.” Everyone chuckled.

“Sorry.” He grinned when the priest looked at him with playful anger.

“I’ll repeat.” He cleared his throat. “Tom Holland, do you take Y/n-”

“Yes.” Everyone giggled at Tom.

“Will you please let me finish?” This time he seemed almost angry and Tom looked at him with a cheeky smile. “Alright, I know we all know the answer to this but formalities." He shrugged. "Tom Holland, do you take Y/n L/n to be your wife?”

“Yes.” Tom took a step closer to you as he placed the ring that was once your mother's on your finger. "Dead poets honor." He smile.

“Y/n L/n” He turned to you. “Do you take Tom Holland to be your husband?”

“Yes.” You nodded fighting back a tear when you placed your father’s wedding ring on Tom’s finger. "Dead poets honor"

“Congratulations. You are now husband and wife... You may kiss the bride.” The priest smiled when he saw the way you and Tom and looked up from your hands to each other’s eyes.

Tom took a second to step closer to you, placing his hand on your cheek to wipe a falling tear. He took your appearance in and you did the same.

For a second you felt like the only two people in the world and nothing else mattered. You brought your hand to his chest as he suddenly leaned in kissing you like it was the last time your lips would ever touch.

He held your waist as the kiss deepened, and you smiled when you were brought back to earth with the numerous cheers and claps that echoed in the small Chappell. The boys cheered and sang like this place wasn’t sacred, or was suppose to stay quiet. It was the best moment of your life.

In this moment, you knew life was never going to be boring again. 

~

Taglist - @justifymyfeelings @slytherinambitious​​​ @ourfavoritesergeantbarnes​​ @criminaly-supernatural​​ @trustfundparker​​​ @tomhollandreads​​ @prettysbliss​​​ @ksmy-99​​​ @sarcasticallywitty15 @bi-lmg​​ @nerdy-collector-festival​​ @lovely-blackinnon​​ @hunnybunimdun​​ @playnineteenfifties​

#Tom Holland x reader #Tom Holland x you #Tom Holland x y/n #Tom Holland #Tom Holland imagine #Peter Parker x reader #Peter Parker x you #Peter Parker x y/n #Peter Parker imagine #Peter Parker #spider man x reader #dead poets society #dead poets society au #dps

[crycotard]

During my birth, there was a minor complication, or so my father told me. Just as in the ultrasounds, my tiny hand was on my head. "Twisting your hair, since before you were born." He said.

My grandfather, smugly thought he knew me, saying he could tell I was tired, because I was twisting a lock of hair around a finger.

I tried to snap out of the habit, then. Not wanting someone to think they knew anything about me by it. Not when I twisted my hair when I was tired, when I was bored, when I was anxious, when my hands for any second weren't occupied.

I cannot imagine someone lovingly, gently brushing my hair. My hair, since I was a child, was dark brown, and thick. It would tangle horribly. My first memory of my hair, is my mother jerking a brush through it, not pausing at the snarls. My head would pop back, and my mother would sternly tell me to keep still. To stop being dramatic.

My hair was never cut more than the trimming of dead ends, and the upkeep of my bangs that always got in my eyes, except for Sunday mornings. My mother would take my sister and I into the bathroom, curling iron burning our scalps, pulling at our hair. Hair spray stinging our eyes.

As soon as I got old enough, I was tasked with brushing my own hair, my mother sick of my squirming. I would let mats burr up at the nape of my neck, before finally spending the better part of an evening ripping them out with a hairbrush.

I left my hair long, unchanged, clear up until my first year of high school. I grew my bangs out, and hid behind them. My hair reached most of the way down my back. It hid how my shoulders and back began to warp. The first thing I did to my hair, was dye the ends black, nearly a foot, only one third of my hair. My mother did this for me when I asked.

I grew to hate people commenting on it. So successful a shield, nobody ever said anything about me unless it was about my hair.

My final year of junior high, on some unrelated doctor appointment, they finally saw the one shoulder kicked up, how my spine curled forward and sideways.

For the first time in ages, I asked someone to touch my hair. Asked a neighbor to please braid it in tight little rows, so no one had to touch it while I was in the hospital having my back hammered straight, while I was healing. While my mother was the one who would have had to care for it.

My first year of high school, while walking down the overcrowded hallway, my tangled hair latched onto a student's water bottle attached by caribeaner to their backpack. The wide eyed panic, the embarrassment, me, sick to my stomach trying to set the thing out of the way, where it could be found again. I vaguely remember frantically asking a friend, 'help. get it off.'

A few weeks later, in front of my whole family who had watched me fight haircuts for years, I put my hair in a ponytail, and hacked it off. Two feet of it.

After that, I couldn't stop. Late at night, chopping off bits and pieces. Smearing dye over what was left. My hair grew shorter and sorter, until it was close cropped to my skull. My family rarely knew what I would look like in the morning.

Neither did I.

It never grew past a mangled undercut. I rarely let anyone else lay a hand on it.

My high school had a strict policy on unnatural hair colors. Naturally, for graduation, as they paraded us in front of the college board, I wore my combat boots, and dyed it a vivid jade.

After that, it shimmered between black, blue, teal, and one memorable, angry summer, red. It never got long enough for it to need to be brushed.

#yknow just word vomit about childhood memories #as you do #crycotardsjournal #pls dn't rb without asking if you would

[hold-my-hand-kuroo]

the soulmate au i thought i wouldn’t write

aka the soulmate au where everyone is born with a book quote on their chest, and soulmates are people who share the starting and ending lines from the same book, and kuroo’s just unlucky

so basically,,,i took that devastating headcanon that kuroo’s parents are divorced and combined that with a faulty soulmate system and a quick little something on it while still promoting my neighbors to lovers bullshit-

pairing: kuroo tetsurou x reader

i.

It’s one night after Kuroo’s visit home that he lies restless in bed. Soulmates. He hates the very essence of the word, especially since his own possibilities are so unclear and vague. He thinks he’s cursed, just like his mother, for having such an unbelievably common line etched on his chest.

“It was love at first sight” was found in countless novels, novels that were never Kuroo’s cup of tea, but he read them, read as many as he could find out of curiosity. It wasn’t because he liked the idea of running into a special-someone after single meeting; in fact, he despises the very idea, as he finds it a little shallow and unsubstantial to a developed relationship after a culmination of encounters, but that was just him. Rather, it’s his frustration working against him, making him count every different quote, every different fragmented line that could’ve matched with the one forever stuck to him.

It’s far too much, and frankly, Kuroo hates feeling uncertain.

“You’ll love him,” his grandmother had told him upon welcoming him at her door. He almost froze in her warm embrace. “He matches exactly with you. It’ll be great!”

It wasn’t great as it turns out, but Kuroo had predicted that way before his supposed soulmate entered the door with his grandfather, and over a lackluster, silent meal, Kuroo left convinced that this man was absolutely not his soulmate. He even goes through the trouble of looking up the book that his lines came from, and he’d much rather not be associated with its contents after reading the quick summary. Out of courtesy and respect for his grandparents though, he does take the man’s number with the promise of speaking to him once again.

“Maybe it’ll take some time,” his grandmother reasoned, patting his shoulder gently. “It’s different for everyone.”

He wonders if she’s right but can’t imagine how much time it’d take. He likes his relationships, whether it be romantic or not, to start naturally, to grow with interaction and conversation until they flourished. There’s something manufactured to him about an arranged meeting with the intent of spending the rest of his life together with a stranger that he knows nothing about. A stranger that he simply isn’t interested in getting to know, not that it was the man’s fault. It’s Kuroo and his fear of ending up like his parents that keeps him alert and unwilling to pursue anything beyond just acquaintances before getting to know someone well.

“So? Are you planning on calling him back?” you sigh through the phone. It’s almost 5 AM, and you knew that when your phone buzzed at your bed side two hours ago, your best friend needed help. “

“Kitten, I lost that number the moment I walked out of the house,” Kuroo lies, stifling his yawn. He knows he should’ve been asleep, and he knows even better to let you sleep, but time passes far to quickly when he’s being serenaded by your speaking. “I just wish she’d stop setting me up with people. I swear it’s a new person every week.”

“It is,” you correct matter-of-factly. He can practically hear your eye-roll through your voice. “Have you talked to her about it? I’m sure she’d understand if you mentioned something.”

Kuroo groans. “I can’t do that to her. She’s been trying so hard, and to be honest, I’d feel a little bit bad since she’s been with me from even before I started playing volleyball.”

“Prior to conception?” you ask, raising a brow.

“Are you saying that I played volleyball in the womb, Y/N?” he asks, laughing. Finally.

“I’m just saying that you were a brat since birth.” He continues laughing softly much to your pleasure. “Now that you’re finally feeling better, can I go to sleep now?”

“It’s almost sunrise, though. Why not come take a run with me instead?” Kuroo offers. He knows you won’t, but he finds pleasure in teasing you over your lack of will to move. “I’ll even walk while you’re jogging to match your pace and give you a running start.”

“Very funny, Tetsu.” You swear that you’d hang up on him one day. A day that was better than whatever slump Kuroo found himself currently in. “You know I can’t run for my life.”

“It’s never to late to start practicing a healthy lifestyle,” Kuroo tsks. You retort back with something about sleeping properly, but he ignores it. “I’ll be out at 6. Would love to see you waiting for me.”

Kuroo knows that you won’t show up, and he doesn’t blame you. Not everyone could bring themselves to run right at dawn, especially people who slept very little thanks to him. He means it as a way to get back at you, to sound fine and normal again so that you won’t have to waste time worrying about him, and he believes that it works when you bid him a ‘good early night’ and go back to bed.

That is, until he sees your very grumpy and very disheveled appearance waiting for him outside on his sidewalk, tapping your foot impatiently on the pavement. He thinks he’s dreaming, taking no time to rub his eyes multiple times before he realizes that yes, you are indeed outside waiting to go on his morning run with him.

“After this, you owe me,” is all you say before getting your promised head-start. Kuroo walks steadily behind, making sure to take extra slow strides so that he won’t pass you.

The sun, just peeking through from the horizon outlines the back of your figure, shining on your hair and skin. Kuroo watches, gaze intent, and finds himself spacing out. He wonders how it’d feel to do this every morning, to wake up and spend more than just a run with you, but hugs in bed and breakfast too. Even if he hates cooking for himself, he thinks it’d be fun to do it with you. Would you be a morning person? He’s always kept you up at ridiculous hours on the phone, so when was morning for you? And how did you prefer your eggs to be cooked? Kuroo’s not a chef, but he prides himself in his healthy, balanced meals. If you ate with him everyday, he’s sure that he could-

Kuroo knows. He knows that he’s falling, been falling since forever, but he’s too scared to say anything to you. In a world with hundreds, maybe even thousands of books that started or ended with the same cliche line, “It was love at first sight,” he fears the idea of risking your happiness for his own sake. It seemed far too convenient for the two of you to be soulmates, and the thought of pursuing a relationship with you with the high risk of failure and keeping you away from finding your true fated one is a strong reminder for him to control himself.

He watches your fleeting figure in the distance and walks even slower.

ii.

“The knife came down, missing him by inches, and he took off.”

From the start, you had the sinking suspicion that Kuroo’s quote matched yours. Even without realizing that his was the exact first line to your last line, there was something that just felt so incredibly natural about Kuroo. The fact that he was always there to listen to you and vice versa ever since your middle school days is a strong affirmation that Kuroo is indeed much more than just a friend to you.

You think back to the late night talks via phone cup, the two of you still in your adolescence, as Kuroo would vent to you about the fights his parents were having. The two of you were too young to know back then that the fights were just the start of something far bigger. The conversations would grow longer into the night, each day seemingly to grow worse and worse. Sometimes, you’d find yourself falling asleep right at your desk in the classroom of your elementary school.

“Hey, Y/N,” Kuroo had whispered to you on one fateful night. You raised an eyebrow at him, waiting for him to finish properly. “Uh, over.”

“What? Over,” you responded, trying to be as quiet as possible.

“Today I learned how to make things quiet….over,” Kuroo answered, grinning from his window. You remember your confusion and raised brow as you watched him run away from the cup and back, suddenly with two pillows. “Check this out.”

You watched curiously as he stuffed the two pillows on the sides of his head, almost as if they were to serve as ear plugs. That was the beginning of the mess that was his hair, you suppose, as ever since that night, you’ve never seen him look put together again. Not even during important ceremonies like graduation did he bother fixing his bedhead. Rather, it was impossible to do so, and you knew from first hand experience, trying to tame the mess almost every day during high school. Secretly, you enjoyed raking your fingers through his hair and enjoyed the physical contact.

“Hey, are you even paying attention?” Kuroo whines, snapping you out of your thoughts. From beside you, he turns his head to look at you, raising an eyebrow. “It’s getting to the good part.”

You roll your eyes. “Tetsu, this is the fourth time you’re making me watch this crime documentary, but for what?”

“But the DNA-“

“Nerd.” If you think hard about it, you can pinpoint the exact moment when Kuroo changed drastically. He wasn’t always as charismatic and as hardworking in his childhood, but you know for sure that it’s because of volleyball that he flourishes. He’s not an idiot, he never was, and you recall one fateful day in middle school when you visit him in his house to find him actually studying instead of playing games.

“I have to keep my grades up or else I’ll get kicked from the club,” he had said simply, but when you caught him tutoring his other teammates during his lunch break, you understood that it was a completely different story. Before you knew it something had triggered Kuroo into maturing quickly, working tirelessly at becoming all-rounded in his studies and sports. Whether that something was volleyball or the little bit of hope that Kenma gave him every time he showed up to practice, you weren’t sure, but you knew in your heart that Kuroo’s sudden improvement and change in attitude was what made him the captain of Nekoma later on in high school.

High school was a little lonely, you have to admit. Between exams and nationals, you felt that day by day, Kuroo slipped away from you. You watched his games whenever you had time, visited him at practices, and even studied with him whenever he offered, but he felt so distant. You didn’t blame him, though. You’re more than pleased to find him so involved in something, and whenever you heard his hyena-cackle from the gym, you thought about the quiet boy who once hid inside his room all day to avoid his parents. It was for the best.

You were always worried if he got tired of practicing until sunset and studying until sunrise while also keeping his team from falling apart, but even when you sat in his room during the weekends, waiting for him to wake up, he seemed content. Exhausted, yes, but upset that he could finally bring the people around him to stay together and rise? Never.

“If I knew you were going to be this bored, I would’ve picked something else,” Kuroo mumbles, breaking you out of your train of thought again.

“Kuroo, I was bored the second time you made me watch this.” He chuckles a little bit. “Crime documentaries are only interesting the first time.”

“I don’t agree with that, but I’ll put something new on, okay?” Scrolling lazily through the options on Netflix, you sit back and sigh. It doesn’t go unnoticed. “Something wrong?”

“Just thinking about how cool you’ve gotten,” you reply, trying to sound as sarcastic as possible. But it’s true. He started as a childhood crush that you merely dismissed as something part of growing up together and talking every day, but it had spiraled out of control before you could control it.

“Falling for me?” he teases with a wry grin.

“I’ve been falling, Tetsu.” It comes out of your mouth almost instinctively. Perhaps you were getting frustrated with the weird limbo that the two of you found yourself in, stuck in the area of something more than friends but not quite lovers. You bite the inside of you cheek to stop yourself from saying anything else.

He’s silent. You wish he weren’t. It’s foolish, but the smallest part of you hopes he’ll say that he feels the same, but you also know about his circumstances, his parents, and his worst fears. It’s selfish of you, and you take his silence as an affirmation of that.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur, getting up from the couch. “I’ll get going.”

As you walk quietly outside of his house, you feel a pang of hurt. He doesn’t try to stop you, and you don’t blame him after crossing the unspoken boundary that he’s worked so hard to establish and maintain. But still, you miss him by your side walking you home, lending you a jacket if it was too cold. It’s your first time walking home alone in years, you realize, and you suddenly understand how quiet the night can be without the occasional rambling about chemical compounds or impressive volleyball matches.

When you get home, you almost forget about why you’re feeling so upset in the first place and try to call him before realizing that shouldn’t. You promptly hang up.

iii.

Kuroo dislikes conflict, especially when it has time to grow into something bigger. That’s why, the moment you walk out of his house, he considers his options. He could walk right out of his house to chase you, but what would he even say? He doesn’t like his throat feeling dry, and he definitely does not enjoy not having the proper words. It’s not something he can take lightly, because they’re your feelings, and he can’t step on them any longer.

He supposes that option two would be to wait for things to cool down so that he can apologize for being scared, for loving you so much that he’s afraid to waste your time, get you hopeful, and then let you down. He wonders if you for exactly how long he’s wanted to tell you his feelings and thinks back to his lonely childhood when you were the only one who offered to listen to him, the only one he could rely on, his savior. He didn’t dare to say anything then, and neither did he in high school, but he secretly hoped that teenage impulse would’ve taken the reigns then. It never did.

Instead, he’d just spend his every waking moment thinking about you and his every free weekend by your side while slowly, steadily creating boundaries to prevent himself from acting dumb. It’s a paradox of struggling to stay close to you but keeping you away just enough so that Kuroo won’t give in to instinct. Whether or not the two of you could go back to normal now wasn’t clear to him, and that’s exactly what he despises. Kuroo appreciates clarity and supported answers akin to a well-written research paper or the sound of a volleyball after a cleanly killed spike. He likes to know things, to be sure.

But most importantly, he values settling arguments in a quick and timely manner. He wills to learn from his parents’ mistakes, but the pit of fear he feels as he’s running toward your house close to midnight is a sign to him that he’s just the same as the people he doesn’t want to be like. Perhaps had he cared for you less, he wouldn’t have bothered to make amends. And perhaps you would’ve moved on and found a soulmate that you knew for sure was fated for your love and affection.

He throws pebbles at your bedroom window, hoping that you’re still up. He’s never seen you sleep before 1 AM, but he’s still nervous. When you don’t answer, he tries calling instead. Multiple times.

“What is it?” you mumble quietly, and he finds himself feeling oddly relieved. You open your bedroom window and squint, faintly making out Kuroo’s figure on your yard.

“I wanted to talk,” he replies slowly and takes a deep breath. You don’t say anything, so he takes it as a cue to continued. “I, uh, well first off, thanks. I appreciate it.”

“For someone who breaks into the weirdest motivational speeches I’ve ever heard in my life, you’re sure making this awkward, Tetsu.” Well at least you still had the humor in him to tease him. That’s a good sign.

“There’s not an easy way for me to tell you how much I don’t want to hurt you,” Kuroo answers. Even though it’s dark outside, the dim streetlight lets you see that he has his head hung down low. “Y/N, I like you. And I’m sorry.”

You feel your head spinning. You’re not even sure what he’s trying to say, so instead, you grip your phone tightly. “You better not be talking about liking me as a friend, Tetsu.”

“Yikes, do you really take me for someone like that,” he winces. “I mean it romantically Y/N.”

“Then why are you apologizing?” Your question comes out in shock, and you’re sure that he can hear your heart beat from outside of the window. He looks up at you, smiling.

“Because I don’t know if I should’ve told you,” Kuroo admits. “I don’t know…if we’re meant to be together, and I don’t want to fight with you every day.”

“Tetsu, we’ve known each other for years now, and whenever we fight, we always talk it out,” you say softly into the phone. There’s a brief pause, giving time for Kuroo to deliberate. You bite the bottom of your lip, feeling uncomfortable when he doesn’t say anything back. “I know you’re scared, and I understand why. I’m not gonna force you into something you don’t want to do. We can stay as friends, you know?”

“But I do want something more,” he argues back almost instantly. You hear him tsk under his breath through the line. “Do you…do you know how long I’ve wanted to hold your hand? Y/N, everything I look at reminds me of you, even the little cracks on the sidewalk. But what if we end up hating each other? We can’t even go back to being friends if that happens, and I-“

“Or we fall madly in love with each other.” Kuroo thinks your answer through carefully. Sure, that sounded more likely than his worst-case scenario, but he’s sure that’s what his parents thought too when they started dating and got married. He can’t say for sure though since the only time he’s seen them together was when any sort of affection they used to hold for one another was already gone.  

“Tetsu, we’ll be fine. I know it.”

And just like that, he feels his restraints break apart, years of love and adoration for you spilling out. “I’ll do my best—no. I promise I’ll never hurt you.” He silently makes a mental list of vows, swearing himself to never leave you crying alone, to never drag on arguments for weeks, to never throw anything at you.

“Yeah?” you murmur and take his words to heart. Kuroo’s a man of his word, loyal to a fault. It’s why you fell for him in the first place. “Now, care to come in and tell me exactly what about the sidewalk cracks reminds you of me? I’d like to know.”

iv.

“Babe, last chip,” Kuroo offers, handing you the nearly empty aluminum bag of Lays. You turn away from the movie the two of you are watching to look at him skeptically.

“What happed to my chip-hog, Kuroo Tetsurou?” you ask, feigning shock. He rolls his eyes so hard that you think they’re going to get stuck at the back of his head and starts to take the bag away from you. “Kidding, kidding. Thank you for the last chip. Your generosity is very much appreciated.”

“I’ll have you know that I usually eat healthy, unlike someone I know.” You can’t argue that and instead try to reach for the chip, feeling around the oily inside. You notice Kuroo’s keen gaze on you, unusually keen.

“If you wanted the last bite that badly, you can have it,” you laugh, but he shakes his head, offering a weak smile. You’re about to ask why he’s so strangely before your finger tips feel something solid against the bag. After a little bit of further investigation, you realize that it’s round and metallic and not the last chip. “Tetsu…”

“Sorry, I already had the last chip to be honest,” he confesses rather awkwardly. “There is a leftover though.”

You pull out the item and hold it against the light. The ring itself is just a little bit oily after spending some time in the bag, but it glimmers brightly. Kuroo holds his breath, waiting for a more vocal reaction from you, hands balled up into fists so tightly that his knuckles turn white. Your eyes dart back and forth between the silver band and his face contorted with anxiety as if he was expecting rejection.

You can’t believe it.

“Tetsu, I love it,” you murmur, awestruck. You take one of his fists, open it up, and place the ring into his palm. “Put it on for me, please.”

Kuroo’s hands are shaking as he gently grabs your fingers, sliding the ring on with ease. He let’s out a sigh of relief upon seeing that the fit is correct, but that isn’t enough to stop his excitement. He hears his heart beating in his ears and feels his eyes become dangerously wet as he looks at you. You smile and then laugh.

“Why are you crying, Tetsu?” you ask. He’s heard your voice thousands of times now, but there’s something about it now, it’s honey-like quality, that makes him melt even more and falls in love all over again. Pulling you into his chest, he buries his face into the crook of your neck so that you can’t see him crying, but you sure can feel the dampness from his tears and his shaking body. “Hm?”

“I didn’t think you’d say yes.” His voice is just above a whisper, tickling your ear. You feel him press a slow kiss onto your neck before continuing. “I dunno…I thought you wouldn’t want to do the whole marriage thing with me.”

“Why not?” You’re devastated that he’d even think that and wonder what you haven’t been doing to give him that boost of confidence. Kuroo notices your sudden change in tone, nuzzling further into his neck while making a sound of disagreement.

“It’s not your fault,” he mumbles. “It’s just…why would you marry someone that isn’t even your soulmate for sure?”

“We’re soulmates even if our quotes don’t match.” You say it with so much confidence that Kuroo’s heart almost stops. He knows that neither of you can be sure, not with so many people with the same engraving in his chest, but he feels as if he can believe you. “What about you? If anything, I thought that you didn’t want to do the whole marriage thing.”

Kuroo doesn’t reply. Instead he thinks back to the first major fight you two had. It started as something small and trivial but grew faster than he had anticipated into something much more serious. He remembers the yelling, the words exchanged that neither of you truly meant, and the door slamming and the lonely night he spent sleeping on the couch that followed. He had thought that it was over, that the two of you weren’t meant to be together, and it crushed him. Without noticing, he had become greedy and wanted to desperately keep you in his arms at night instead of letting you slip away to another possible soulmate, so when you finally left your room the following morning and broke into a conversation, compromising and talking over the events from the previous night, it was a weight off his shoulders.

But more importantly, it convinced him that the two of you were already far better than his parents who had left their problems unsolved. He could do this, and so could you, he reasons, and that was exactly what he thought when he bought the ring.

“I just love you a lot and wanted to try something new, you know? Maybe it could work out, like you said,” he finally answers, leaving his thoughts behind. He leaves his spot at your neck to face you, eyes fond with a grin. “And to be honest? I don’t think I’d be able to let you go that easily. Soulmate or not, you have me wrapped around your finger.”

You laugh and trail your fingers across his cheat. “I’m glad you think that way, because I’d hate not being forced to watch these boring movies every weekend.”

“You seemed pretty invested a little while ago though,” he teases back, pecking you on the cheek.

“No way.” You return the action by kissing the tip of his nose and raking your fingers through his hair. You swear he purrs but choose not the ruin the moment. “I was just thinking about something.”

“About me?” he says with his goofy smirk.

“Yeah,” is all you say, but before you can respond with something witty, Kuroo presses his lips to yours. He feels your eyes flutter shut and hums in content, smiling a little at your reaction. The two of you would be much more than just okay, he thinks, finding your hand once again to run his fingers over your ring. And then, feeling a little bit courageous, he find himself imagining a petal-adorned aisle and ringing bells, all with you standing by with him.

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