#I’m grateful they put up with me | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

razorsrockinart · 19 days

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[[ Sky’s Can’t sleep talk]]

Honestly these last weeks I have really developed a good friendship with folks and I love them and hold them close to my heart 🩵🩵

#skysblog #just you know #All the folks I talk to #via DMs #in chats #I’m grateful they put up with me #and trust me

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stuckinapril · 8 months

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I’m happy for the little life I built for myself

#there’s a lot of ways to go #i am nowhere NEAR the dream life I really want to attain #or the dream person I want to be #but high school me #hell even freshman in college me #would GAWK at the life I have so deliberately made happen.#the solid network of friends I have #the confidence I’m slowly but surely growing into #the discipline I’m harvesting bit by bit. i do not claim perfection but I am 100% improving #I’m just happy idk! i don’t compare myself at all now bc I know I’m on the right track #especially compared to where I was like 5 years ago. such a different mind state from now #and no one can take that away from me #there’s a lot more to go. a lot more. but I thought I’d pause and be intentionally grateful for what has been accomplished #bc it actually puts things into perspective to look at the past rather than just look to the present. it creates contentment #i get so caught up being hard on myself for not accomplishing certain things yet #that I forget I pulled myself out of such a deep rut by the skin of my teeth #and that’s important to keep in mind even as you progress to your goals #anyway <333 happy content in my own lane etc etc #p

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itspileofgoodthings · 2 months

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so many people have said that as you approach your 30’s things start to fall into place but I don’t feel that at all. the closer I get the more it feels that everything is dissolving and falling apart

#it’s not all in a bad way!#I’m hoping Wendell Berry is right and it may in fact be that when we have lost our way our real journey begins #and there is something where in the dissolution of certainty God enters and directs us the way He wants us to go #and reminds us that we’re not strong and independent from Him but children in His hands #but I would be lying if I said I didn’t miss the certainty of 2018/22/younger Maria #I don’t quite know this new self #except for teaching everything is uncertain and I sort of daren’t pick up the colored pencils of life to do anything with them #I guess that’s what makes me really grateful for teaching #it’s firm and sure contact between me and the outside world #but everything else is just drifting and I am at sea!#anyways I am so sorry for putting personal self-reflection and analysis on your dash on this Easter morning #ewww ugh disgusting blegh I’m sorry #but trying to gain some clarity through words #Happy Easter! thank you for listening!! praying for you all

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goldkirk · 3 months

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I opened Pinterest for the first time in months.

That made me realize a lot about how bad I was actually doing and how much of a Waffle House Index use of Pinterest is for adult me, apparently.

I hadn’t realized it had grown that foundational to me in a healthy-brain-exercise-and-hobby-joy way. Nice to know moving forward! It’s another sign I can keep track of and use to spot correlation/indicator patterns earlier my behavior.

I love this kind of thing, it makes me so excited!

#personal data hacking is my passion #someday I’ll tell a story about the most notable times I tracked things or hacked my own mental processes from childhood to now #including the fear of spiders and bed wetting and behavior changes and posture and heart rate and cursive and putting kitchen items and #trash away as soon as I’m finished using them instead of never ever or ages and ages later #I’m so proud of that #you have to give it time and still commit. chaining thoughts and routines and behaviors really works #we are not separate brains and bodies and external environments #anyway I’m gonna go haha I used up he last of my energy burst on Discord and here and I need to go rest and lie on the floor and probly doze #love you all be back soon bye mwah!#add to journal #trauma evolution #my Waffle House index #this is going to be a fun new tag I’m so going to have fun with this and I bet it’ll be a helpful example reference for other people too #more than just for future me!#so excited so proud of myself so happy so grateful for hope about me really trusting that my ability and my behavior and my performance #are able to and going to yes keep getting better #long many-milestone path-journeys of potential #like when I was a little 6-7 year old kid-team athlete looking ahead at a concept of a future with me over time getting #stronger and cleverer and faster and slicker and calmer and even happier and more and more capable and able to accomplish!#a gift. all this time I didn’t think I’d have and have been living anyway is such a gift.#knowing that I truly have future time to grow and explore and change and improve in even though I still can’t FEEL or IMAGINE that future #time yet. also a gift.#the time I will one day realize I can imagine a future and imagine myself alive? will be a gift.#breath is a gift. experiencing life is a gift. other life is a gift. rhythm is a gift. motion is a gift. awake is a gift. color is a gift.#such a great expanse. all of it new. all of it eternal. all of it me. all of it nothing I’ve ever known before. all of it all of it #all of it. gifts.#gonna go have floor time now. this would be such a nice time to re-re-regain my ability to cry!#mwah I love you future me. take care of your hand and thank u for writing all this down 💛#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?#my poetry

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thepunkmuppet · 6 days

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I think I’m actually gonna write that long post-tfatws sambucky falling in love fic lads. they’re the only part of the mcu I give a shit about anymore and seems like we’re getting fuck all from the upcoming movies and bucky might DIE so I’ve got to take matters into my own hands

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blueberryspyder · 3 months

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I know my blog doesn’t have like, any followers, but I wanna make it clear that transmisogynists are not welcome here. I also know for a fact I have some people I need to unfollow for being transmisogynists. The last few months I’ve been very, very confused by wtf “transandrophobia” was, and I had only ever seen the “good” side of it, and never the side of it being used to actively hurt trans women. I’ll admit I’m still confused on certain things, but I’m not above admitting that I might be wrong and I’m willing to learn, so thank you for your patience.

To any trans women/trans fems who follow me: I support you, and I want you to feel safe here.

Edit: I’m retracting the bit about transandrophobia, since some of y’all have been really kind (genuinely) and helped explain the theory to me (as well as the antisemitism behind the “truther” term, which I apologize for).

To any fellow trans men/trans mascs that follow me: I want you to ALSO feel safe here. Even if my original message came from a good place, it was still worded poorly and painted us in a bad light. I won’t delete this post cause I don’t want to hide from my misconceptions and help others like me who are confused, and because I want to stand behind the message that transphobia of any kind is NOT welcome here. Thank you 😊

#captain's log #wanted to make it clear #since I’ve been very in the dark about what transandrophobia stood for #I never fully believed in it but I did agree with some of their comments #I saw there was… antagonistic energy towards the group to say the least #and the way they would respond put me off #so I sat outside of it and looked at it through a critical lens before diving in #and then I saw that one anon message and went ‘ah okay’#remember: you are not immune to propaganda/cult like mentality #I’m grateful I’ve learned to be critical about what others tell me #and to look into things before I take a stance #and I can’t beat myself up for that because I thought it was just a blog dedicated to trans men! and I’m trans masc!#but after learning about it I started looking at what they were really saying and I didn’t. like a lot of what I saw #but I still saw things that I agreed with #so I was confused #it feels hard to ask about it yknow? especially since I was only seeing the ‘hate’ from people who didn’t believe it existed #so I’m really glad I found that long post from earlier it really shed some light for me

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the-flame-is-gone · 6 months

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Compilation of me being a normal and well-adjusted individual about The Flame (Is Gone) by The Dear Hunter

#sorry for being cringe. it will happen again #the dear hunter #the acts #the pimp and the priest #mr. usher #ms. leading #hunter #my post #i’m so grateful my friends put up with me because just look at this #and these are my more normal ramblings about the song too

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myfriendtheghost · 1 year

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goodnight goober

#i had an amazing evening 😭😭😭🩷🩷🩷#I rolled up to this q&a expecting a full house but it was only FIFTEEN PEOPLE and they put the stools right in front of us instead of on #stage #and we got a backstage tour !!!! we got #to hear the official recording of a new song before their label lol!!!#and they showed us a music video they have coming out next week on Ed’s laptop lol but it wasn’t finished yet #“don’t worry Jesus won’t be green” 😭#and I got my hug from franni 🥹 she saw me and my mom and hugged us and ugh I just love her sm #this is the only band I love more than Greta if that tells u just how huge this was like it was so cool #I love them so much I’m so grateful I get to know them

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catcr4ft · 24 days

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Making wof ocs for a solo campaign and inserting Vincent into places again

#Vincent gets picked up by a super grateful dragon researcher and decides that I Will Manipulate This Beast Into Keeping Me Safe #but then!! she slowly starts to care for her!!#dumps korean over my oc scavenger kingdom because this is MY kingdom and I do whatever the hell I want #anyway I’m considering when I want to put the campaign #the three ~ four other mc’s backstories will shift significantly based on that I haven’t ironed out the details yet #wof scavenger oc #t3xt #oc: Vincent #what about the character named- COUGHS WHAT #동명이인 구굿

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ilikecheeseandchocolatee · 1 month

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Well not exactly a vent but it’s just stuff pertaining to my personal life that only a few mutuals know about sooooooo yeah read the tags first for content warnings

Just talked to a friend from school after a long long time because i wanted to make sure he’s doing okay (he’s Palestinian) and yeah i just talked about how I hope i see him whole and healthy when I come back to school next month, and he said that he hopes I’m better too

And I was like wait what

So yeah idk if you guys know but memory issues are probably my main main problem right now in that they’re actually horrifically bad and I should really see a professional about this as soon as I am financially able to. So I was like okay what if there was something wrong with me last time I was in school

So I asked him what I was like last October and he said that I seemed really stressed/paranoid and that I seemed really on edge (those are his words) and like damn. In that regard yeah I’m doing so so much better now than back then. Which is understandable because England always fucks up my mental health I just didn’t expect it to be that bad in October. What in the world was a stressed about? I had nothing to be stressed about except my medications doing their job. NOW I have about a billion things to be stressed about. And honestly what was I being paranoid about. I have pretty much no memories of last year now which is obviously not ideal because I have exams for fucks sake.

Past me I am sorry for always throwing shade at you, I’m trying to remember that I don’t remember the past and I can’t possibly judge you for things if I don’t remember what you were going through. But I keep forgetting about my memory issues. I’m very sorry and please know I still love you and I know you’ve been doing your best since you turned 15. I’m sorry that I keep doubting you and hating you. I’ll try to remind myself that I have issues.

Future me here is a promise. I promise that I’ll try to be kind to myself, ALL versions of myself. I’ll try to be kind to myself when I feel lazy and hopeless, and I’ll try to be kind to myself when my thoughts are getting the better of me. I’ll try to be kind to myself as I work on myself and I’ll try to see the progress I’ve made in the past few years. I’ll try to be kind when im struggling and I’ll try to be kind when I’m doing better. I’ll try to remember to not throw shade at any past version of me, because I’ll try to remind myself that I don’t remember most things anymore. I know I keep feeling like I DO remember but I need to accept that I don’t, not just the times when I get proof that I don’t. I need to remember that I do not remember things and to not judge past me anymore. Im sorry past me. And I promise future me. See you both

#okay yeah it’s a vent sorta #vent #rant #tw vent #tw rant #it’s not that long tho #cw paranoia #cw England mention #cw mental health #cw memory issues #cw current events #meep meeeeeeeeeeeep #as a side note I know that a lot of the time I’m grateful for my memory issues because then I can also forget bad things #and stressful problems and whatnot. but there seem to be a lot of downsides too.#i forget important things. i still haven’t sorted out my voter id which I was supposed to do in the past couple of months #i forget to drink water? but I think everyone has that #idk I can’t remember what I forget right now #yeah one of the worst things about the memory issues is the paradox of not knowing what I forget because I’ve obviously forgotten it #and a lot of the time I get the feeling that I’m forgetting something but the problem with that now is #maybe I have that feeling almost constantly these days because I’ve started just ignoring it #before this recent downgrade of my memory those feelings that im forgetting something were my greatest superpower #I’d be like okay. my brain is telling me im forgetting something. and then I’d sit and think for a while until I remembered.#but now I just straight up ignore the feeling because I have it all the damn time.#which is not good? i think?#like yeah the issues keep me stressfree most of the time but it’s still so horribly inconvenient #what if im travelling on a plane and I forget where I put my passport and boarding pass #that would be disastrous #it’s scary sometimes #the knowledge that I have memory issues but no knowledge of what I can do about it to make sure I stay safe #it’s a weird and paradoxical existence with having memory issues if im honest

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stuckinapril · 3 months

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my gma told me that my mom used to wake up, eat breakfast, then study for 12 hours straight. every fuckin day. and my gpa would bring her food and tell her to take breaks bc of how immersed she was. she’s literally my role model forever

#I want to be on that level of sheer focus/passion w everything I do #this is what I remind myself of whenever I’m lazy or I don’t feel like putting in the hours. like my mon did THAT every day #I rly am intrinsically motivated bc of her and she also showed me that you truly can love science even in a broken education system #ofc being raised in her image did predispose me to science but I’m also so grateful it’s an organic love #and that I’m not doing it for something as dumb as prestige or money. like I genuinely adore it #and I was never raised in a gIrL MaTh household like my mom made it clear math was very fun to me since I was like 2 #and I think that influenced my confidence in pursuing stem/medicine bc I grew up watching my mom solve differential equations for fun #I also love how suffused she was in her studies. that must’ve felt so rewarding. I strive to be that way too #she also taught me it’s possible to be smart AND pretty and that has been the motto my whole life #I luv my mom post no. 8272662 I just had to say it #p

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ciucalata · 2 months

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the fact that i have no one to talk to about my obsession with the quarry is slowly driving me insane and i can’t take it anymore

#ellie vb #someone put me out of my misery pls #i’ve been kinda talking with a friend about it a little and about my fic #and i’m really grateful she’s putting up with my annoying ass #but she doesn’t know anything about it so I can’t full on rant about it like i want to #lxie if u’re reading this i love and appreciate u u’re amazing #it’s not u it’s me i need someone who is obsessed with the quarry too

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dramat-ique · 1 year

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Me every day when I get on Discord to post in my designated info-dumping channel about Bart Allen to my friends who have never read a comic he’s in but who love him deeply anyway.

#I’m very grateful they put up with me #dc #Bart Allen

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fispy · 3 months

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At some point I think I should block all the popular Tumblr users and see how weird my dash gets.

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buck-yyyy · 1 year

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hi mom, love you mom, thank you for still being proud of me mom

#shoutout to her for putting up with me #we’ll be in the car and i’m just happy as a clam talking for ages about garfield and will’s body and beetlejuice’s closing and the #significance of mirrors in the goldfinch and she’s just sitting there driving occasionally nodding or saying ‘oh yeah i remember that’#and for that i am eternally grateful #okay enough being sappy because i’m telling myself i’m not allowed to be sad tonight #even though i am sad #whatever #fuck it #no sad!!!!

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incendiorum-arch · 11 months

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woke up feeling salty

#ooc tbd.#I just don’t think we can have the female oc convo without also including nb muses getting put in the back burner for cis male muses too #bc I have had that unfortunate experience for fucking #six years now?#I have fought so hard for every bit of traction I’ve gained and it has barely added up #I’m so grateful to the people who’ve given me a chance and have stuck around #but it’s not the amount of people that would have if io wasn’t so explicitly NOT a man #the times that I DID have more attention interest was when I tried to be more lax about pronouns and shit #and that was miserable #how can you look at me exclusively using they then pronouns every day all day for every response #and still willfully misgender my muse #and every time I’ve made a point of going out of my way #to point at io with a neon sign that says NOT A FUCKING MAN followers would drop like flies #so I think I have every right to be salty about this #negative tw #misgendering tw #I’ve made a lot of mistakes with them in the past and was a pushover #and I’m happy where I’m at now #bc their gender is respected #but god I still think about my experiences here a lot #and I try not to be salty I really do but.#and I’ve written female ocs too I’m not trying to belittle that conversation I just think that nonbinary and trans muses need included #in that convo too #or should be talked about the same way

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