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wizard-on-whales · 3 months

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Modern AU! for rdr2 characters

These are my headcannons for each character and what I think they would do in modern times.

Characters included: Arthur, Micah, Dutch, John, Abigail, Mary-Beth, Karen, Tilly, Sadie, Strauss, Charles, Susan, Bill, Lenny, Hosea, Sean, Molly, Javier, Swanson

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Arthur Morgan:

He works a blue-collar job. He would most likely be a ranch hand, but for some reason, I can also imagine him being a plumber or welder. In his free time, he does art and sells prints on Etsy. He is still an old-fashioned gentleman (In a good way), and all of the ladies he meets swoon for him, but he is a himbo and doesn't realize they are practically in love with him. They will give him the most obvious hints, but he will think the women are just being nice.

Micah Bell:

He's the creepy uncle that you avoid at every family gathering. He hasn't had a job in like 15 years, and no one knows how he can still pay his bills. And he also always smells like lingering alcohol and cigarettes. He will lean too close to his nieces and say extremely concerning things everyone would choose to ignore. Im also getting the vibes that he went to prison for several years, but no one knows what for.

Dutch Van Der Linde:

He sells people scams or owns a pyramid scheme business. Similar to Scentsy products, he somehow convinces all of these people to buy his products to sell to other people, telling them they will get rich by selling these products, but, in reality, he's screwing them over and making most of the money himself.

John Marston:

If we are talking about early Red Dead 2 Marston, he still lives in his parent's basement and plays video games on his PC all day. He also watches Andrew Tate and would try to boss Abigail around and tell her he's an alpha male. (She'd slap him and tell him to get over himself) Late rdr2 and rdr1, he's grown out of that mindset and has become a working family man. Potentially also a welder, like I said for Arthur. But any high-paying physical job works.

I feel like Abigail, Mary-Beth, Karen, and Tilly would all have a mom group they host every week to discuss their child's newest achievements. Their husbands think that is all they do at the meetings, but they also have in-depth conversations about women's suffrage and how the world caters to men. They think of ways to better the world and bring more women together to discuss these topics and bring light to issues regarding women. The girls would run a pretty popular Facebook group where they let other women express their opinions on those topics. (Arthur is a part of the Facebook group and likes every post he sees and comments shit like, “You're doing great, ladies! Keep up the good work! 😁🥰👍”)

Sadie would probably occasionally attend these meetings (Although I dont see her having children, she would go for the cheap wine and to hang with her friends). Sadie would also go for the in-depth conversations and bring new thoughts to the table because she is a CEO or manager for a very successful company. She would share her experiences of what it's like to be on top of the men who work for her but still be looked down upon by them simply because of her gender. She would also probably share tips on that Facebook page on how to create a successful business without having to attend years of college and give tips for all stay-at-home moms who want to be more than just moms and wives. (She would also be the cool rich aunt)

Leopold Strauss:

He would do the same thing. He gives loans to people who he knows won't be able to pay back the money, and then when the bill comes, he'd ruin their lives and probably end up breaking up families/ relationships and send people to jail for not paying back the money in time.

Charles Smith:

I can see him being a park ranger or working in any conservation field. Potentially even a firefighter who deals with all of the forest fires that happen in places along the West Coast. He’d also be one to do something similar to what he did in the game, but he would work with the local native tribes against companies to try to win back their lands before it gets plowed over for an Amazon factory or something.

Susan Grimshaw:

I can see her being the mean substitute teacher who yells at everyone to get to work, and then when someone does something slightly wrong, she would yell at the whole class and be like, “In all of my years of teaching, I have never seen a class behave this badly.” Either that or she would work at the front desk of the business Sadie runs. Miss Grimshaw would NOT play with anyone who would try to be rude towards her.

Bill Williamson:

Ehem…a police officer. I feel like this one is self-explanatory. But he would mostly sit in his car and do nothing his entire shift. Occasionally pulling someone over for speeding. If they are a white dude, he'd would let them off with just a warning. Poor Lenny would probably get the ticket.

Lenny Summers:

I feel like he would be the one to graduate high school early and go to college as soon as possible. I dont know exactly what he would choose for his degree, but I feel like it would be something involving politics. Maybe that wouldn't be his major, but he would take a government class. Or Potentially going into journaling.

Hosea Matthews:

He's the retired grandpa who used to work in a factory where he made a surprising amount of money and was able to retire early. He spends most of his days walking up at 5 in the morning to watch the sunrise and read the morning paper. And he’ll spend every opportunity he gets to take his kids or grandkids fishing. And if you stay at his house overnight or for the weekend, he gives you a bowl of ice cream every night before bed and recounts every story he could think of that happened from the last time you saw him. (Some of them are surprisingly concerning, but he is one of those badass grandpas)

Sean Macguire:

Similar to John, Sean would spend most of his time gaming on his PC and arguing with children on COD or Fortnite. But he also works at a local bar as the bartender and won't hesitate to argue with the drunk assholes and would slap a bitch if needed. But he also embarrasses himself by flirting with women who will give him dirty looks or tell him that they are gay. (I feel like Karen would also work late-night shifts at the bar with him, but shes also taking online college classes because she wants to be a social worker)

Molly O’Shea:

Instagram and TikTok influencer 100%, and lots of brands like to sponsor her and send her free stuff (Mostly because of Dutch’s business.) and she posts videos of her and Dutch, and everyone in the comments freaks out about how he is grooming her because of their age difference but she denies it all and says that they are actually in love. But then she would post a video to that one sound, “My god this reminds me of when we were young.” And Molly be like 8, and Dutch be in his mid-to-late 20s.

Javier Escuella:

He’d be a musician. He would have started out in a shitty garage band with Sean and John or something, but then he’d realize he actually wants to be a serious musician while the other guys were just messing around. So he’d leave and make solo music that blows up, and he ends up going on tour, and making a lot of money and becoming hugely successful.

Reverend Swanson:

The preacher you always see in the corner of the bar Sean works at. And if you went up to him and started talking to him, he’d tell you the most profound things. He would tell you about his life when he was younger and what happened that made him lose hope, but he would motivate you to never give up. He’d be that person you meet by chance for a few seconds that you would never forget. Hosea probably invites him to go fishing with him from time to time. But instead of fishing, Swanson stares at the water ripples in silence. Hosea would let him sit in silence and let Swanson enjoy the company and the time to think while being sober.

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#arthur morgan #red dead redemption 2 #rdr2 #dutch van der linde #van der linde gang #john marston #micah bell #hosea matthews #red dead fandom #javier escuella #lenny summers #arthur morgan rdr2

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watercolorofthemoon · 2 years

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i forced my roommate to watch both LOTR and The Hobbit with me. Here are some highlights

LOTR:

Roomie: I like this gandalf dude Me: Oh yeah me too. he's a bit questionable sometimes but we love him

30 seconds later, gandalf fighting saruman: Roomie: NO MY SKRUNKLY

Roomie: awe sam is a precious boy Me, internally: oh you dont even know the half of it

merry and pippin stealing crops: Roomie: ARE THEY THE BASTARD LITTLE BROTHERS?? me: I mean i gues- Roomie: FOUND FAMILY LETS FUCKING GO

Elrond being disappointed and having strong eyebrows: Roomie: i feel like i've let down my dad and i dont even have a dad

Roomie: i don't really like boromir that much- me, pausing the movie to explain why boromir is extremely valid: I WILL HAVE NO BOROMIR SLANDER Roomie: is this bc he's a himbo

Roomie: this thorin guy sounds pretty gay if he's given bilbo this thing thats worth more than the shire me, internally: YOU HAVE NO IDEA MOTHERFUCKER

gandalf dying: roomie: NO MY BOY

roomie: please tell me gimli and legolas are gay, because everyone else seems extremely straight me: they arguably one of the gayest duos, yes. roomie: oh good. i thought they straight-washed sam for no reason me: i mean. there are a lot of frodo and sam moments that have no heterosexual explanation viggo breaking his toes: me, practically bursting at the seams: roomie: oh god what is it me: DID YOU KNOW-

gandalf is alive: roomie: FUCK YEAH MY BOY

me, explaining the uruk-hai: roomie: fucked up of a yas character to do that tbh (referring to saruman's manicure)

theoden being stubborn at helm's deep: roomie: okay i like him BUT COME ONNN MAN

eowyn picking up merry before they ride to gondor: roomie: I KNOW I WANTED TO KISS HER FOr A REASON MWAH MWAH EOWYN me:...she gets a bf roomie: NOT ANYMORE

aragorn: for frodo roomie, bursting into tears: me: whoa whoa u good roomie: ITS HIS DAD. ITS FRODO'S DAD.

sam literally carrying frodo up a mountain: roomie:...thats a bit gay mount doom blowing up: roomie: thats unecessary and homophobic

frodo sailing to the undying lands: roomie: TAKE YOUR BOYFRIEND WITH YOU YOU COWARD

The Hobbit:

the scene with baby bilbo: roomie: NAUR I LOVE HIM

bilbo and gandalf interacting as adults: roomie: this feels like it could go very wrong thorin finally showing up: roomie: listen im gay but i'd consider it me: he's probably also gay roomie: mlm and wlw solidarity okay we're bffs now

bilbo running out of the door: roomie: again. this feels like this could go very wrong. me, internally: oh fuck how do they KNOW already

thorin throwing down his weapon bc bilbo got caught by trolls: roomie:....thats....sus. me:...if this is sus...oh boy...

thorin's obvious dislike of elves @ rivendell: roomie: okay so. explain to me why thorin doesn't like elves again- me: did you not watch the entire introduction to thorin? roomie: NO WAIT I REMEMBER THE BLOND BITCH

saruman showing up: roomie: ew.

galadriel showing up: roomie: HELLO SAILOR AWOOGA AWOOGA

bilbo and thorin nearly falling off at the mountain pass: thorin: he's been lost ever since he stepped out his front door roomie: WDYM YOU'RE ALL FUCKED UP- thorin stop being mean to your husband

the entirety of the goblin tunnels and gollum: roomie: this does not bode well. at all. the ring showing up: roomie: I WAS RIGHT

azog versus thorin scene: roomie: dumb bitch...OH NO DOES HE DIE- bilbo to the rescue: oh no its chill, just gay

the iconic carrock scene: roomie:....this is incredibly gay bestie me: i'm aware.

the entirety of the beorn's house arc: roomie: ...i like beorn. he's feral and skrunkly. so is radaghast.

legolas showing up: roomie: *surprised pikachu face*

tauriel and kili's interactions: roomie: damn i was hoping she would be gay me: i mean with the right headcanons she can totally be a lesbian roomie: UR SO RIGHT OMG

kili getting shot with arrow: roomie: NO THE GAYS-

the laketown master existing: roomie: EAT THE RICH.

bilbo and thorin on the boat together: roomie: oh they definitely fucked in laketown-

tauriel healing kili and them holding hands: roomie: oh no don't make me feel sad for straight ppl me: again. they don't have to be straight. roomie: I KNOW BUT ITS THE PRINCIPLE OF IT

bilbo waking up smaug: roomie: oh bilbo...oh you sweet summer child...you stupid bitch.

thorin threatening bilbo initially: roomie: oh fuck. it got worse. me, internally: oh honey. oh no.

thorin's gold sickness and then nearly killing bilbo at the ramparts: roomie: NO THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE GAY AND HAPPY HOW COULD YOU

*doesn't say anything almost the entire battle until the kili and fili die* roomie: noooo the skrunklies NOOOOOOO

thorin, fucking dies in bilbo's arms: roomie: *turns to look at me with the most murderous look on her face* me: *nervous laughter* so about it getting worse- roomie: IM GOING TO KILL YOU.

end for now, if we end up watching trop together ill let yall know <3

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lottieurl · 1 year

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you can literally always hate jeff in the tags of my misty posts btw im reading those tags the way one reads a morning newspaper. the fanon version of jeff seems so different to canon jeff like he’s not really the dedicated malewife people make him out to be shsjsks. he didn’t want to even try strawberry lube like c’mon now. he freaked out when she saved their asses and grabbed the gun. perhaps this is an unfair assumption for me to have of the writers but ive seen it happen in other shows and i fear they might’ve seen how the general audience liked there’s no book club!jeff and added more of him and that general vibe bc of it. but to me s1 jeff worked bc you spend most of it distrusting or disliking him and then he has a shining moment at the taylors and thennn he goes back to being Like That when you find out he’s the blackmailer. and it’s like this really sad, terrible marriage two people are stuck in for various reason so idk where the couple goals even in a fun failmarriage way comes from. he’s not even the most interesting non shauna member of the sadecki family!!! callie is right there esp if they’re focusing on her motherhood!!! ANYWAYS. jeff & walter’s downfall 2k23 im with you

okay thank you for giving me the excuse to talk about it actually cause i was thinking this since the season started. people's ENTIRE interpretation of jeff as a character hinges and is almost exclusively based on THERE WAS NO BOOK CLUB? literally everything else he does gets twisted so he can stay this fanon dream himbo wifeguy. and that's the show's fault to an extent for sure cause there is a framing there due to how much they want jeff in the comic relief role. but the show does make a point of showing that jeff is deeply disturbed by shauna, that he's been a shit husband actually and he's kind of an awful person tbh. like! thats not a character flaw per se, we are all here for awful characters. but people don't want an interesting dynamic between those two or for jeff to be more than a one dimensional goofy idiot. and they also want shaunajeff to be like. santa clarita diet marriage or whatever which. loved santa clarita diet but that's AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT THING. and an entirely different type of show and we do all get that this would strip shauna of all her amazing nuances right? right? anyways back to jeff. people will see how he reacts to shauna pulling that gun or how he's entirely against everything shauna does regarding callie and go omg wifeguy always supportive. he is not? and for good reasons lmao? people will see teen jeff cheating and be like ye shauna was awful for doing this to jackie but jeff is just a poor little idiot plus (did see a take like this which. hello) jackie wouldn't have sex with him so he's without fault. like. what. anyways he's a cheater who found out SOME of what his wife experiened in the wilderness (not everything for sure cause that man is way waaay WAY too freaked out by shauna's behaviors to know it all lets be real) and decided to profit off the victims he knew as a teen dgsbjfjdjdsb like he offered to go to jail for adam murder in part cause his own blackmailing scheme is what pushed shauna to kill adam? just cause he's kind of funny every once in a while doesn't mean he's A Loving Himbo Wifeguy. all jeff related posts are that and its why i started having an allergic reaction to jeff

#genuinely hate it like this dynamic with him and shauna makes people sort of forget abt all the nuances and complexities #of shauna's character #like i hate that i hate it sorry jeff fans i cant stand this man anymore im tired #i dont want this sitcom vibe except for when callie is there. bye #yellowjackets blogging

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fortheb0ys · 6 days

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WAIT HOLD ON IM SORRY BUT WHOS JEFF AND IF HES FROM A SHOW OR SOEM AHIT SEND ME IT CAUSE JE SEEMS SO BABY GIRLL

AHHHHH JEFF'S MY LIL SWEET PEA!!

He's from a show called Yellowjackets!! I RECOMMEND IT! The show's amazing and Jeff is just the icing on the cake🙏 Look up clips and you're gonna fall in love, I bet ya.

He's very much a himbo husband. Maximum baby girl energy. The silliest lil guy.

I JUST LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM😭😭

#HE'S VERY MUCH A BABY GIRL #TOP TIER LEVEL #☆*cj's inbox 📥

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huevokinder24 · 1 year

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Alchemy of Souls: Light and Shadow

Episode 1

General thoughts:

THEY CHOSE VIOLENCE THIS SEASON AND IM GLAD

The characters:

- Jang uk: THE GLOW UP. THE POWER UP. Yes, he is a little gloomier, who wouldn't be after all he's been through, but I'm so glad he didn't lose his spark despite everything. My baby boy. I'm glad he didn't go full dark (yet) and that he can still tease and be a little bitch with the prince lmao.

He's grown serious, but he's still himself. And GOD, he still loves Naksu so much. This is terrible for my heart. That whole scene in the forest with him drinking in front of the piled rocks in rememberance if her. Him burning the talisman because "if I have this, I won't be able to see you even if you come". DEMOLISHING.

Also, him casually mentioning he no longer wants to live while Love Letter plays in the background??? ABSOLUTELY CRUSHING.

The way he has war flashbacks whenever Naksu mentions marriage? DEVASTATING.

- Naksu: I said it before and I'll say it again: I don't mind the change of actress at all. Naksu and Jang Uk still have great chemistry. I wouldn't stop giggling during their first encounter. Gotta love these chaotic gremlins, that hasn't changed at all.

I know this shouldn't be important but she's so unbelievably pretty?????? Step aside, Jang Uk, if you don't take her as your wife, I will.

I adore this new playful and almost naive side of her. Much like Jang Uk, she's changed, but she's still her. He went darker, she became brighter.

The last scene was both SO CRUEL YET BEAUTIFUL with her being swept away on his wedding day by "her groom" *screams*. SHE, NAKSU, CHO YEONG stepping out of the boat in wedding attire with Jang Uk waiting for her by the shore. Him offering her his hand. Her saying "my dear husband" AND THEN JUMPING AND EMBRACING HIM AND HIM CATCHING HER *uncontrollable sobbing*

HIS REACTION TO THE WHOLE THING. IT HURTS. Probably not as much as a sword through the chest but IT HURTS.

I want more of this, please and thank you.

- Seo Yul: IS HE GOING TO BE THE FIRST ONE TO RECOGNIZE NAKSU??

- Park Dang-gu: my heart feels so heavy for him. Among all the characters, he's the one who's changed the most. His himbo and puppy energy is gone, and not just because he's growing into his new role as head of Songrim, but because... Well. You know. 🫠 I want him to be happy but, at the same time I can't bring myself to like Jin Cho-yeon for now. Hopefully she'll grow a spine, get to know her self worth and stand up to her horrible mother.

- Jin Ho-kyung: absolute bitch.

- Kim Doju: this woman deserves the world. If anything happens to her, I'm suing.

#alchemy of souls #alchemy of souls light and shadow #jang uk #naksu

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mrstsung · 2 years

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What your Kombat Man Crush/boo thang says about you.

(I will only do certain characters. As there is a lot. Plus i don't wanna be super bias. So here ya go.)

Cw: may or may not be nsfw. Some angst too.

🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉

Kung lao: awwww,you love this dimple cutie pie?! Well for one,you instantly are new friends with me. And two,you understand my love for this hat man! He deserves so much better. So so so much better. It's so tragic he doesn't get the respect he deserves. But im sure you will show him that. 💖⛩

Liu kang: you like the classics. You also like the main heroes of almost every story. You may have to kompete with kitana. But hey. Maybe liu can have two cuties? 💖🐉🔥

Raiden: you are either a sweetheart or an absolute badass. Plus he's a cutie. He's so wise,gentle,and amazing. Good taste. 💙⚡

Fujin: you love the sweetest wind himbo ever! You are friend shaped. You dont take shit. But you don't like to start fights. Plus....you love long white/colored haired characters. 🌬💙

Nightwolf: underrated babe af! You love nightwolf,you get respect points from me. May the great spirit protect you both! Many blessings. 🐺💖

Johnny cage: you love the funny himbos,johnny despite the nrs shitty writing. Is actually a great character. He covers up insecurities and fears with humor. Always trying to make you smile. Very protective. A good father. Fuck what anyone says. He is a good husband material. I support you and johnny! Tho i don't like mr.cage in the spotlight all the time. He doesn't deserve any less respect. He has it from me. So as long as he watches himself. 😎😊

Jax: same as johnny good husband,great father. Honestly Jacqui (and even cassie) deserves good mom figures. So another good choice. 😎

Hanzo hasashi/scorpion: omfg tragic af! But you giving him a second chance at life?! Another clan?! Another family. Omfg my heart can't take the cuteness,the angst,unf my heart 🥺💖😭😭😭😭. Just take him,take him plz! Treat him gently.

Kuai liang/sub-zero: same as scorp. Like plz treat him well. He's been thru so much. Im sure the loss of his bro hits hit hard too. Like damn why are the ninjas so damn tragic?! Boon! how dare?! 😭💙

Shang Tsung: another tsimp after my own heart! 😏😎🔥💖 welcome to the cult er i mean club,club. Yessss. *strokes chin evily* ok but fr,you have taste. You know whats up. You like em stronk,powerful,and bad bois. Like how can you not like shang at least a little bit?! His voice,honeyed words. That little serpentine temptation. That gentle hiss. Those eyes. That devilish smile and laugh. Like i know,just know his king cobra some big somethin somethin! Those abs,them arms,that bod 👀💖....ehemm. sorry😅. Got carried away. But yeah,um. You have good taste. 🐍💚

🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉💖🐉

I know it's not a lot. And there is so many more characters. But some i just can't really do. I don't really have anything i can think to write properly about them. So forgive me. 🙏🏻💖. Also may do a kombat ladies version soon.

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mrssabinecallas · 2 years

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Treasure Trove

Callsign: Angel; before becoming a pilot, Angel worked as a field medic for the navy. Many of her patients called her their guardian angel.

BOTH Y/N AND ANGEL ARE USED IN THIS FIC

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw/ Wife!Reader

Pt. 2 to my last drabble, We’ll Always Have Each Other

In which the newly wed Bradshaws move in and unpack together. Mr. Bradshaw finds something interesting about his wife that he never knew of.

WARNINGS! A lot of fluff, Rooster being a himbo husband, a really weird shift from 3rd person to 1st person

Rooster was off in the living room, trying to figure out the new TV he got for your shared home. He unpacked it, mounted it on the wall, and got the power running all by himself, but apparently he picked a super difficult TV to operate.

Angel was upstairs, unpacking the master suite and master bathroom. She had successfully hung leveled shelves, unpacked their clothes, and gotten the bed built all on her own, but now she had to tackle the bathroom.

Bradley walked upstairs to find you and see if you have any luck with technology, because god knows he doesn’t. The landing at the top of the staircase had yet to be unpacked, as it was late in the day and you both needed some place to sleep, so you moved to the bedroom first. Upon walking into the room, Rooster couldn’t immediately find you.

“Y/n?”

There was no response, so he ventured deeper.

“Angel..?”

Again, you didn’t respond, but he heard your humming and his anxiety was relieved. He tends to think the worst in some situations.

He peeked his head into the bathroom to find you sitting on the tile floor, surrounded by colorful jewelry and boxes. Bradley released a breathy chuckle, and leaned against the door frame, smiling to himself.

And there you sat, music playing through your headphones, sorting through all sorts of jewelry and trinkets that you forgot you had. Pulling some funky pink earrings from the pile, you stood towards the mirror and put them in. In the mirror’s reflection revealing your husband standing in the doorway, adorning a look of love. You turned and flashed him the most innocent and adorable smile, he thought he was gonna melt.

Apparently, instead of unpacking the bathroom, you had been huddled on the floor sorting through all sorts of things.

“Hi baby! Look, I found all this stuff, I didn’t even know I had it!” You bounced slightly in place, and Rooster thought he was gonna melt again.

“Looks like someone’s ADHD kicked in,” He chuckled, and you pouted at him. “I can’t help it.”

You tried to defend yourself, but Bradley just shook his head with a smile, and stepped towards you. You pulled the pink earrings you’d found out of your ears, and placed them on the counter.

Next thing you know, Rooster had you thrown over his shoulder, trying to squirm away.

“Wha- Bradley! Put me down!”

“No can do, Mrs. Bradshaw.” He said as he walked back into the bedroom. You stopped flailing, and you turned beet red. You hadn’t forgotten you were married, per say, just didn’t realize Bradley would be so quick to address you by your new last name. You had even made mistakes. Like last week, when you’d gone to the bank as part of your errands, and accidentally said Y/n Y/L/n, and had to correct yourself to Y/n Bradshaw. The bank teller just giggled at your flushed face.

Rooster dropped you on the bed and plopped down next to you.

“Y/n, I love you so much, you know that?” You turned to face him.

“I love you too, Bradley. To the moon and back.”

He gave you a gentle kiss, which you happily returned, and soon fell asleep. Your little treasure trove long forgotten on the bathroom floor. Neither of you were bothered, until early the next morning you woke up to a yelp.

Bradley had gone to use the bathroom, and stepped on a stray earring. He wasn’t so happy about leaving the treasure trove then. hi hi!! thanks so much for reading, and all the support on my last post! im trying to do daily uploads, so hopefully i can keep this up :)

have a great day/night and make sure to stay hydrated! <3

#rooster x reader #rooster fanfic #rooster top gun #rooster fluff #rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #top gun maverick #top gun #missbayside

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buddhamethods · 6 days

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911 pilot thoughts:

buck is hot

this is exactly like station 19

buck is very hot and very stupid and clearly a bisexual,i see the vision,FINALLY A GOOD FUCKING HIMBO

ANGELA BASSETT IS PLAYING A COP HOLD ON ONE MFUCKING SECOND

oh?gay husband and they're not having a divorse yet? the way i know that they will overcome everything and be friends because years of marriage and two kids don't just dissipate within seconds that it takes for husband to admit that he is gay AND ALSO-*gets put down*

nooo buck just chopped up a beautiful boa constrictor (i think) that was in fact constricting someone (the neck) (couldn't breathe) so i get it it's an emergency but GOD did you really have to chop it's head off (with an axe) (head-gone)

wow mister ex addict fire chief man just fired buck for having his hog out all the time...the way they discriminate against my stupid self diagnosed sex addict bestie is crazy! he does need a serious reality check tho

hen you're beautiful and i love you...just so you know ☺

angela bassett's character name is ATHENA?? COULD THE WOMAN GET ANY COOLER im about to faint this is so serious for me

aw buck just hosed down the criminal! he IS the fireHOSE 😌

i whiplash i get from seeing yet another fire station on my screen but no maya in sight is horrendous.

anyway this is fun and i will continue watching what shenanigans these slutty fire department employees will find themselves in

#911 #911 fox #mimi watches 911

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jils-things · 1 month

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JILLLL‼️ TACKLES YOU TO THE GROUND HELLOO... ask game 3, 7, 9, 10, 16 for Mrs. Jaide Stone please 🫶🩷 I know u already ramble a lot abt her and I probably already know almost everything, but I WANNA HEAR U RAMBLE STILL

GOODNESS GRACIOUS THAT IS A LOT. A LOOOOT. you trying to study her like a lil specimen for real and you know what. ill take that because she is nothing short of SMALL DETAILS she is so special to ME THANK U

3. how do the other characters generally feel about your self insert?

let's go with gold first, of course, hehe. gold has witnessed her change a lot, she used to be very playful with gold - rollerskating and skateboarding together in the park. she was not as refined as she is today and she's certainly rough around the edges when she was younger! he loves her for being able to find time to play with him even as an older sister (who can be busy). he's aware that she's changed so much but it doenst change the fact he still knows her deep down and loves her regardless. he's usually very relaxed with her, but he also knows when not to step on the "you are fucked" territory but he still does anyway lol because she will. probably be a little irritated by him HDFJKSAHJSFAHHAA just because theyre close doesnt mean she doesnt drag him out of danger and reprimand all the time 😭😭😭its tough love and big sister energy this is normal.

sapphire ADORES her. she looks up to her, sees her as her guardian and she sometimes goes to her for comfort when it comes to emotions because she's pretty bad at controlling them, especially romantic feelings. jaide sees a lot of herself in sapphire and does her best to counsel her and push her to the right path :3 sapphire picks up wild berries for her!

i wanna mention wallace here because hes so funny to me for being closely connected to steven and ruby ok listen. jaide is like. hoooly shit. you are the flashiest man alive. what the fuck. (<- in her mind). ruby is such a big wallace fan. ruby would go to his mom and go mommmm mom i really look up to wallace i wanna be just like him and his ability to make pkm.n ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS. ruby would show her how he looks like and shes like. oh..... ruby youre not gonna dress like that are you (SLASH LH IM REFERRING TO HIS ORAS OUTFIT ITS JUST SO FUNNY TO ME, LOOK IT UP) AND WALLACE IS CLOSE FRIENDS WITH STEVEN SO IMAGINE STEVEN GOING LIKE "honey i have a good friend of mine who has helped me a lot in the past. it would mean a lot to me if you met him too!" AND ITS WALLACE ASDJFAHFKSAGHSDDKJSDGJAS SORRY THIS HAS BEEN A RUNNING JOKE FOR ME I HAD TO MENTION IT. I PROMISE YOU I LIKE WALLACE AND EVEN MORE IN POKEMAS HES SO SWEET ASFSHDFSDJKHSDKJA

7. would any other characters (besides your f/o) have a crush on your self insert?

GOOD GRIEF LITTLE KNOWN FACT ABT ME AHSFDKGFDSGHSA I ALMOST FELL FOR PO.KESPE!BILL (YES THE ONE NERO IS KISSING) HAFSDJGHGDS BUT I RESTRAINED MYSELF LMAOOO so i guess i will associate him with that????? (THEY NEVER EVEN MET. CRACKSHIP TERRITORY LETS GO) i do wonder who would look cute next to madam stone however i would love to hear it sahsfdsajhf (no dont say riley im saving him AEHM) maybe himbos would cute next to her idkkk wiwiw guys help me find a cute crackship HEAUHAHAHAHHAA

9. who are your self insert’s closest friends?

AAIAUAUAUUU PROFESSOR SY.CAMORE!!!!!!!!!! WIWIWIWIWI (MY DAD IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE SHHH) steven has interacted with him in the anime and i loved it smmm huhu and they both have the common interest in mega stones and i think steven would take her with him to ka.los to meet sy.camore and they would get along very well!!! i think s.ycamore would be such a tease abt jaide being steven's wife ahuhuhu and he'd say stuff to make steven embarrassed. "dear jaide, did you know your - heh, husband steven tends to go on a daze when i mention your name? he's so fond of you that he had to bring you all the way here, huh?" and then he chuckles. STEVEN IS GONNA HAVE A WORD WITH HIM LATER 💥💥💥💥💥JAIDE ONLY LEARNED THIS TODAY AND WILL PROBABLY THINK OF THIS FOR THE REST OF THE DAY

can i say maroon hallo 🤓🤓🤓 NO BUT LIKE WWUWWAAA they are definitely best friends in my eyes, theyre both mothers and their son/brother are close with each other!!! how can i ignore that?!?!? maroon would always give her nice pastries for jaide and her family to eat - lots of well wishes from each other and i imagine jaide would occasionally visit ka.nto (since she also goes to jo.hto to say hi to her ma and brother) and they would just find a lot of solidarity with each other <333 heck i can even imagine if gold decided to visit silver and kris at maroon's place and jaide would call her and ask to watch over him wiwiiw JUST. MOMS BEING FRIENDS WWWWWW

10. how do the other characters feel about your self insert and f/o’s relationship?

AFJMSAKLGFSJGHSAFJSDFKSALGAS NUMBER ONE CONTENDER GOLD AGAIN GOTRDAMNIT GOLD WOULD NOT LIKE STEVEN AT FIRST because he thought he was a part of team rocket (he has the money, he wears an all black suit, something all team rock.et members wear, and gold's dumb brain thinking this makes sense to him) HES SO OVERPROTECTIVE TRUST ME ESP IN THE DATING PHASE DUDE WILLGET SO MAD IF JAIDE SAYS SHES GOING TO HO.ENN "no you are not talking to that blue haired kid" (aha reference) but is his complaining gonna stop? no <3 and then they get married and ruby is gold's nephew and now hes crying. whos winning huh? and whos the clown? gold. thank you.

eventually gold does warm up to steven and finds him to be a very fun battling rival,,, also would probably ask for cash because brother in law privilege i guess. LMFAO. yk steven doesnt mind that actually. jaide has told steven about her family so he knows when to be serious with him or not. he's a good man :3

overall i think many would not actually know about steven's love life because he's private about it. only certain people know about it (the dex.holders, jaide's/steven's family and friends, and zinnia unfortunately) steven is protecting her identity and he wants it that way because he's famous in ho.enn for many reasons. especially for the fact that he has a family, he's very protective of ruby because of the past events that occured and he hopes it wont happen again and it wont be exploited. the only tip of the iceberg knowledge that the public would know is that hes married, he has a child, thats all. heck, i bet people think it would be easy to spot steven's child for his classic blue hair BUT PLOT TWIST RUBY INHERITED 90% OF JAIDES DNA

16. freebie! name a fact about your self insert you want everyone to know.

jaide stone almost adopted blake (b.w2) before i settled with ilynne being connected to blake. cant believe nero called him blake stone once 💥💥💥💥 WAHUSAHUHFHSHFHSA

#THANK UUU SMM #lara tag #~ loreposting #sycamore.fam #jaide (mangaverse).insert #steven stone.rom #gold.fam #ruby.fam #stone family tag #jaide stone is popular among the crowd im so happyiyieiee wiwiwiww #THIS IS SO LONG.... AAGHHHGF #MANNN THANKS A LOT

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doofus-and-dragons · 10 months

Text

OK SO IM ON S2 OF TMA AND I NEED TO GET MY THOUGHTS INTO THE WORLD SO I DONT FORGET

Jon- the love of my life, my current fictional husband, and the man living rent free in my head for the past 2 days- I know you've been through something awful and I understand feeling weary about the coworkers who worked with Gertrude, but am I wrong in believing the Sasha, Tim, and Martin have never worked with her?

I mean, please correct me if I'm wrong, but I was under the impression these three never even knew her.

How could they have killed her?

Jon, maybe Martin's secret is that he's gay.

Wait is Martin gay for Jon?

WAIT WHAT IF THATS THE SECRET

WHAT IF THE "LYING" HE'S BEEN DOING TO THEM IS LYING ABOUT THE FACT HE LIKES THAT GIRL WHO I THINK WAS MENTIONED ONCE

AND THE POEMS THAT JON THOUGHT WERE ABOUT HER WERE ACTUALLY ABOUT HIM

IVE CONNECTED THEM

Anyway, Tim is too much of a himbo to be able to pull anything this complex off (affectionate)

And Sasha worked in the relics room before the archives so

I don't think she's a suspect

So episode 47 huh

I didn't make the connect to micheal UNTIL MICHEAL STARTED TALKING

I THOUGHT JON WAS TALKING ABOUT A DIFFERENT MICHEAL. MIKE? FROM EPISODE 46 AND ALSO THAT ONE WHERE ELIAS RUDELY INTERUPTED LIKE THE BITCH HE IS

It's funny when Sasha, Tim, and Martin do it, but how dare he

Yes, I am aware this is a double standard. But Elias is an annoying prick and I don't like him

Anyway, Micheal sounds like a feral version of Glam from Heavy metal family and honestly? I love glam so I'm here for it.

MICHEAL DONT HURT JON'S HE'S BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH

Micheal is agender confirmed. Why? Because They/It litterally said they didn't exist

MICHEAL DID YOU STAB JON?!

DUDE I LIKE YOU BUT DONT WHY

WHAT DO YOU MEAN PREMATURELY?!

SIR?!MADAM?! PRESENCE?! CREATURE BEYOND MORTAL COMPREHENSION?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN?! WHY DID YOU STAB JOHN?!

I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS

#the magnus archives #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #sasha james #micheal distortion

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diorsbrando · 2 years

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ship your moots pls <33

also happy birthday!!! <333

AHHH OKAY ITS MY TURNNNN?!? and thank you nonnie for the bday wish ily❤️ @shoutaswhore also asked me this so ima just answer two in one go

@dejwrites hmmmmmm aki or shunsui are top two but idk if i can decide which one . maybe aki 🫣 bc i have this personal hc about him that he knows how to ride motorcycles and he takes you on late night rides on his bike all the time bc it’s so soothing and he’ll never admit it but he loves when you cling to him like that. and as for shunsui well, basically what i said in the fic i wrote for him: he just wants to take care of you😭

@hellavile eren. ren. mr. yeager. no further explanation needed bc i know , and y’all look so good together based off all the moodboards and avatars ive seen you make w him in mind <3

@yourlovermori UMMMM izuku. and yes i say this bc ive read your fics and drabbles about him they’re so good and get me going 😩 i see u in those scenarios

@shirohyorin TOSHIRO HITSUGAYA. THE ICEY MAN, THE DRIPPEST LEGEND HIMSELF, THEE CAPTAIN OF THE TENTH DIVISION. again no explanation is required ! ur url and our lovely chats in your server are proof in itself

@divilyn dottore 😩 another that doesn’t need to be explained 🫣 you’ve made me simp for him in unhealthy ways that shouldn’t be discussed in public but i just loveeee the way you write him !! i can only see u with him

@eiflawriting i just…i get classy high end vibes from you so i MUST pair you w nanamin 🤞🏾i can see him taking you out for dinner to all these diff places and tryin new foods and experiencing life w him and then coming back to a bubble bath in dimly lit bathroom, w good movie and some bomb nasty ass sex and marry even a marriage proposal right after ;) he’d have it all planned out

@obitohno UM OBITO DUH! or maybe kakashi or naruto but IM LEANING TOWARDS BITO for obvious reasons ;)) he’d be so sweet to you Omg the best himbo husband / boyfriend everrrr always showerin you with love <3

@blueparadis wakasa. THEE imaushi wakasa. no i won’t elaborate except ill say that the way you write for him??? no im obsessed.

( edit ) @shoutaswhore im conflicted between aizawa or katsuki 🤔 hmmmm i think both would be good fits for you! katsuki would resonate with your chaotic evil disposition and like match your wavelength almost but in the opposite way ? idk if that makes sense but he would act like he’d be annoyed by you but really there’s nowhere he’d rather be than by your side <3 aizawa is the same , except he’d like satisfy some part of your inner child and really take care of you, im talking cooking for you, protecting you from harm and malicious people all of it ; he’ll make you feel so safe :)))

#—sosa’s thoughts💭#moots :)#🍫—asks!#tag games !#a small fraction of the many many many beautiful amazing moots out there

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