#LITERALLY could write an essay but this is like.

[homestuckreplay]

Violin Concerto in the Key of Meteor Strike: Who Is Rose Lalonde?

Character Deep Dive 2 - 6/2/2009

Homestuck’s narrator formally introduced us to John Egbert right as the comic opened, but our getting to know Rose Lalonde has been slower and more natural. From her earliest conversation with John on p.63, to her becoming a ‘playable character’ of the comic on p.139 when she and John begin playing Sburb, to our switch to following her in person actions on p.214, we already knew a lot about Rose before we had her name and list of interests. She’s just as weird as John but with a spooky gray filter applied, she’s a regular kid who will probably summon a demon, she’s an absolute control freak who’s still kind of a failure at video games, and she is our second Main Character, set up as a contrast to John as well as a friend.

Much like with John, I’ve used Rose’s list of interests to group the information we know about her, and to discuss her relationship with the other characters and with some themes of the comic so far.

Essay below the cut - about 3.6k words.

Quiz here - 13 multiple choice questions.

1. You have a passion for RATHER OBSCURE LITERATURE.

If this was the first thing we learned about Rose, I might see her very differently. I’d definitely take her more seriously. But I saw her destroy the plumbing and put the bunny back in the box, so learning this now comes off very differently.

With John’s ‘passion for REALLY TERRIBLE MOVIES’, we were given posters to illustrate his taste, and based just on critical reception, ‘really terrible’ is a huge oversimplification. So we know that the narration isn't completely objective, and we know from other clues that Rose's interests in psychoanalysis and games are fairly surface level, which makes it an easy leap to ‘Rose reads a lot of HP Lovecraft and thinks of that as way more obscure than it is because she’s 13 and gets book recommendations from forums’.

There are two posters on the left of Rose’s wall that could be book characters - they look like amateur art of regular, non-tentacled people. I wonder if they were birthday presents from one of her friends, whether it’s John or TG sending her original concept art made by the author of a book she likes, or fanart if one of her friends is a visual artist (GG, perhaps?)

John not only loves movies, but imagines himself in their stories (for example, p.223) and the things that happen to him reflect his movies in response. Without any specific titles, it’s hard to say if the same is true for Rose - but if so, it raises questions of genre. John’s story has been lighthearted action-comedy with darker themes below the surface, light fantasy and countdowns leading to an explosion that’s almost comically absurd even while it has our hearts racing. Rose’s story is already darker both in literal color and in tone. Her inventory system is still terrible but she uses it more pragmatically and she’s far more skillful about skulking around her own house. This, the design of her house, and the sudden flashes of lightning illuminating the sky red or revealing a shadowed figure give her story a survival horror feel. If that’s her taste in literature, it would make sense that she’d imagine herself in that type of story.

2. You enjoy creative writing and are SOMEWHAT SECRETIVE ABOUT IT.

Where a normal person might say ‘hey I heard you got the sburb beta’, Rose Lalonde says ‘I understand you have recently come into possession of the beta release of "The Game of the Year", as featured in respectable periodicals such as GameBro Magazine’ (p.63). It’s the first thing we hear from her, so we learn immediately that she likes the sound of her own voice. She’s the only kid in her friend group who uses perfect capitalization and grammar in her messages, and she criticizes game walkthroughs as ‘horrendously written’, suggesting a focus on the technical aspects of writing.

Her creative interest is seen in ‘I think I will write my own walkthrough’ (p.204) where she moves beyond criticism and at least believes she could make something better, and ‘It’s not especially practical. But I think they are elegant’ (p.154) which shows an interest in the style and aesthetics of things. We also get great glimpses of her prose in lines like ‘Its lurid glare has moved on to younger timezones’ (p.174) - I can imagine Rose writing fanciful mood and setting pieces that focus on description over dialog.

In her eccentric verbosity, Rose’s character voice is more similar to the narrator’s than any other character’s is. The narrative text on p.82, for example, feels more comfortable in itself than Rose’s messages do, but it’s not a million miles away. I’ll come back to Rose as a narrator figure in the section on knitting, somehow. 

Rose is not only secretive about her creative writing, she’s secretive in general. On page 164, she tells John not to investigate after she rips out his toilet. She asks him for ‘space’ to fix it and sends him away, and clearly prefers to work unobserved especially when she’s uncertain. She also shuffles her purple package into the closet (p.218) and her writing journals under her bed (p.220) when she feels the narration’s scrutiny. The narrator states ‘You would only resort to such an embarrassing activity while no one was watching’. Rose is clearly ashamed of some of her interests and personality, and hides a lot of herself from observers to make herself seem cooler and more mysterious than she is.

(I have to note that this does not work, at least not where her friends are concerned. Before we hear from Rose directly, we learn about her from TG, who says ‘maybe you can play with TT shes been pestering me all day about it. shes mackin on me so hard all the time i start to feel embarrassed for her’. Definitely not the way she’d want to be introduced to a mass audience).

3. You have a fondness for the BESTIALLY STRANGE AND FICTITIOUS, [...]

The 'bestially strange and fictitious' is what's being referenced in the tentacle of tentacleTherapist, not an innocuous interest in marine life. This is one of her shared interests with John, who apparently liked paranormal lore. It's interesting that these beasts are 'fictitious' according to the narration, but Rose's grimoire is specifically for 'summoning' the zoologically dubious, not just learning about them. This positions Rose as a more active character than John (summoning instead of learning lore) and as someone who has grand designs and fringe beliefs - kind of an Ellie Arroway in Contact figure.

I've talked about Rose and John as scientists based on their chumhandles, versus TG and GG as religious. We now know that Rose lives next door to an impressive sized lab broadcasting from an antenna. Depending on how good their security systems are, she might have explored here, or at least peered through the windows at the strange, unethical science experiments they're surely doing (aka the extremely routine lab work that she's interpreting as mad science). Growing up with scientists as her only neighbors might have inspired this interest and got her started on weird experimentation of her own. As it's unlikely she has formal training beyond middle school, it makes sense she'd be into weird tentacles in jars instead of a more academically accepted field.

I've been wondering how many of Rose's interests are from childhood and how many go further back. The cuddly Cthulhu plush and the very cartoonish monster on her shirt suggest this was a childhood interest, even if the specific monsters she likes have changed over time - some of her more unsettling posters might be recent additions. We don't know enough about her mom's parenting style to guess if she was mostly unsupervised on the internet and able to look at horror from a young age, or if she was held back from something she had an interest in until her mom felt like she was old enough, and how that might have impacted her either way.

4. [...] and sometimes dabble in PSYCHOANALYSIS.

This is the 'therapist' half of Rose's chumhandle, and the easiest interest to guess based on her early appearances. Psychoanalysis, to Rose, appears to be the idea of knowing people better than they know themselves and guessing their underlying motivations and thought processes - therapy through telling people what's going on in their head instead of talking it through with someone. From what we've seen so far, the vibe is 'she's read Freud's Wikipedia page and cares more about putting her basic knowledge into action than reading more theory'.

In Rose's first chatlog on p.63, she accuses John, 'You're wearing one of your disguises now, aren't you? You are typing to me right now while wearing something ridiculous.' She says this right after John mentions going to get the Sburb beta from his dad - 'mom' and 'dad' are activation words to someone with an amateur interest in Freud, and she's immediately putting herself in John's head and making assumptions about his life. (She's right, but probably only because they're already good friends).

On p.160 she tries to pull a similar move, saying 'Is this how your pent-up frustration with your father manifests itself?' and John shuts her down. But in her efforts to analyze other people, she tells on herself more than she wants to - her previous message was 'I am not sensing a lot of regard for the personal property of others' and considering this message comes as she throws John's personal property around his house, leaving his things on the roof and in the backyard, I'm going to call this one projection.

Rose's only direct statement about her mom is on p.174 - 'I'd rather not risk an encounter with my mother. I battled through her cloud of gin and derision once already this evening.' In this same pesterlog she compares her situation to John's, suggesting that she thinks John's situation of 'cake, jesters, unfaltering love and support' isn't really that bad. While she's not wrong, it's a very unproductive thing for a so-called therapist to say, and it shows a lack of self awareness - Rose seems like she would hate being coddled with cake and having a business clown cramping her goth style.

I really think Rose is more of a lab scientist than a therapist, but being able to perfectly understand and predict people is such a helpful skill for someone who is insecure and wants to project an image - if you can understand how someone thinks, you can influence what they think. She definitely wants to control how she's perceived, and likes to have information in general (see: immediately looking up GameFAQs when she couldn't figure out Sburb right away). Psychoanalysis is also used in literary criticism, so it's also possible that she uses this to advance her creative writing, if she's open to any kind of self reflection.

5. You also like to KNIT, [...]

Knitting stands out from Rose's more esoteric and highbrow hobbies. It's not something we've seen her mention, but her sweaters, scarves, socks and hats scattered on her floor look finished, so she has skill and commitment (but lacks a good storage space). I bet she knits while listening to audiobooks. It's a hobby that needs some perfectionism and attention to detail, which seem like traits Rose prizes even if she doesn't possess them (see p.170 where Rose reveals that she placed the Cruxtruder without rotating the room to check if she was in the way of the door).

Rose calls her shot about Sburb's punch card alchemy on p.157, and doesn't confess to reading walkthroughs until p.178. While it's possible she was reading them sooner, it's also possible that she's familiar with punch card knitting, maybe even has a knitting machine somewhere in the house. Knitting is fundamentally the same principle as (punch card) alchemy - taking an abstract image or code laid out on a 2D card, and using it to generate a physical object. The totem lathe and alchemiter could function similarly to a knitting machine, using build grist or cruxite instead of wool, but creating patterns in similar ways.

Following this logic, knitting is a generative hobby, as is creative writing. Rose makes things in a way that John really doesn't (he's clearly never finished coding anything) and has been doing so before playing Sburb. It's interesting to associate her with creation in light of her underlying god complex. Frankenstein is another 'obscure' book Rose has probably read and loved. She is a Dr Frankenstein type of scientist, she is going to knit Fluthlu and bring them to life. The Sburb server player is such a godlike role, and she slides into it so naturally, immediately taking full control and giving orders.

When she's the player character but we haven't seen her yet (p.139-201), she feels like an invisible but omnipresent narrator one layer below the actual narrator, a watchful presence that John can't escape. On p.145 she tries to select John with the Sburb cursor. It doesn't work, but what the hell was she going to do if it did? Drop him outside? I keep coming back to how she seems aware she's being watched by the narrator on p.218 and p.220, in the same way that John knows he's being watched by Rose (but doesn't seem aware of the narrator, despite reacting to their commands). Is it possible, even, that she's (consciously or unconsciously) trying to emulate the narrative voice with her messages in her efforts to take on a similar role?

Her conversation with John on p.204 is fascinating. John tells her there's a meteor heading for his house, and her response is 'I see'. She stays cool and collected and completely unattached throughout the conversation, trying to solve the problem through citing GameFAQs, talking about how much smarter she is than other people, and refusing to compromise on her incessant use of inconveniently elongated words. She fits the stereotype of the Objective Intellectual scientist so well, too concerned with what's possible to care about its fallout, taking notes on John's reactions in her lab notebook while feeling no emotions about the whole thing. It sure is interesting that a video game might be able to cause a meteor strike. Sure would be an intellectual exercise to figure out how to stop that. She is so perfectly above it all.

6. [...] and your room is a BIT OF A MESS.

I never realized John was neat until we had Rose, who definitely isn't. On p.160, she says she's 'tempted' to clean up the mess in John's toilet for him, but everything she does actually makes his bathroom worse. We've actually seen John clean (p.67) and the only out of place things in his room on p.4 are things his dad left there, if we assume that Dad left the hammer and nails for John to hang the painting. All his mess comes from accidental sylladex misuse - he even makes his bed. Rose will simply leave an expensive violin balanced precariously against the wall, drop a pre-punched card on the living room floor instead of placing it on the coffee table, and fail to return John's magic chest to his room even after she's 'got a feel for the controls' (although this last one could be her being silly on purpose). I can't decide if Rose is being an asshole by leaving John's house in a complete state or if she's just Like That and doesn't even notice.

Rose has an inventory system that she knows how to use, so it's easier for someone to be clean if they want to be. Maybe she just doesn't. The rest of Rose's house is empty besides dope ass wizards - on p.230-235 we see that Rose's house is filled with long, expansive corridors, has at least three floors, and is large and modernist with strange towers and extensions and bubbles. If Rose's mom is minimalist and Rose feels like her house is missing something, of course she would expand to fill that space, with her physical possessions as well as her personality.

7. And on occasion, if just the right one strikes your fancy, you like to play VIDEO GAMES with your friends.

John has a poster of the Problem Sleuth heroes on his bedroom wall, as well as a copy of the game, and Rose has a poster of the Problem Sleuth beasts and demons. It would be cute as hell if they played it together. Rose playing a video game has been most of what we've seen of her so far, so I've kind of covered that in other points - I want to talk about the 'with your friends' part, and specifically, how she and John met.

They seem so different, and based on Rose's strong reaction to the intelligence of GameFAQs writers, if she just encountered John on a forum she would not give him the time of day. John definitely isn't stupid, but I think he can come off that way in a first interaction, and I think Rose makes quick judgements about people. John can definitely banter with Rose - my favorite early interaction of theirs is 'TT: Can a disorder also be a complex? EB: in your case, probably!' (p.160) - so all it would take is getting over the initial hurdle of starting a conversation. So I have three theories.

The first is that they did meet on a forum, and John was just so charming in his silliness that Rose eventually warmed on him. Maybe John got stuck on the loading screen of a game and couldn't figure out how to press start and Rose helped him out and John just kept liveblogging his game in the thread. Maybe John asked a question about Slimer from Ghostbusters on a cryptozoology forum and Rose gave him a weirdly anatomically detailed answer that referenced a worrying home use of concentrated sulfuric acid. Maybe Rose posted some of her writing online and John left a glowing comment.

The second is that they met through TG. He seems to have a fair bit in common with both of them - on the surface, more than they do with each other. He could have noticed one of their shared interests and put them in contact, or he could have been trying to fuck with them by setting them up to hate each other and it backfired. Either feels plausible from what we've seen of him so far.

The third is that Rose just used to be different. John has the childlike spirit of the clown and I get the sense that he's always been the same, whimsical on the outside with a malaise hovering within. But Rose is trying to put on such a sophisticated affect, which could be recent. Rose could have been bubbly, accepting and open to talking to anyone a few years ago. She's changed as a person, but stays loyal enough to her friends to brave the evil red storm for them.

Final Thoughts

I find Rose easier to analyze than John - she's not less complex, but her complexities are made more obvious in the text. We also don't get the luxury of sitting with Rose and learning about her organically like we did with John. The meteor countdown is flashing in my mind even when it isn't on screen, and the text needs to take shortcuts, telling us about Rose instead of just showing her. As such, I don't have as many questions hanging as I usually do, but there's still a few.

What's up with both John and Rose being really talented at music, but this not being listed in their interests or directly acknowledged by the narrator? Does the narrator fucking hate music? The narrator of a webcomic which has so far included five original music tracks??

Is Rose consciously aware of the narration? Is it something that just began for her when we saw her, or has that been part of her life before? Is this why her personality is so cultivated, because she feels like she's always being watched?

What exactly is Rose's relationship with her mom? Is her mom a mean alcoholic who mocks Rose's grief over her cat, or is this a story Rose is telling herself about her very average mom?

Is Rose a weird kid who actually has a pretty normal life, like John, or is her life weird for real? Does she live in a massive haunted house or are we getting her exaggerated perspective?

More broadly, what sources of information in Homestuck are reliable? The narration and chatlogs are both biased perspectives, but what about the images? Are we seeing the characters' worlds as they actually are, or are we seeing things as the point of view character perceives them?

I love Rose. She and John have both been really easy to connect to, are extremely likeable, and feel like real people I could run into on the internet. I love how average they seem and how they really have more flaws than strengths - it adds to the realism, and sets them up with a lot of cool options for story arcs. A Rose who's a loser and kind of sucks is so much better to me than a Rose who's actually good at the things she claims to be, and my only hope is that we solve the imminent crisis and see more of her being truly silly.

#AFFECTIONATE. if i dunk on her here its because i love her and i think shes a good character #tho i did struggle not to refer to her as the sheldon cooper of her generation #homestuck #analysis #rose lalonde

[iceformer]

It's 1:40 am but let me cook real quick

Ally Beardsley, the Person, Fundimentally Changed the Fantasy High Universe (an essay)

Fantasty High Freshman Year was supposed to be "dnd meets 80s high school" with the cliques and general vibe. The Interepid Heros grew up in the 80s but now live in the 20th century, so some anachronism were expected.

In later seasons we see the charecters using more crystal tech and making more modern references , the biggest ones I can think of being social media and Sandra Lynn having Life 360 for the Mordred girls

It would be like if they were playing a normal game of High Fantasy DnD where "we haven't invented plumbing yet so there's no toilets" but instead it's payphones and phonebooks

Again, the Intrepid Heores are all at least 90s kids so they would have grown up while technology was still in dial up and computer rooms, but they're also actors/comedians. The brief was "imagine you are all in Magic Breakfast Club Land" and we see them all playing up their tropes (or stereotypes) in Freshman Year (edgy Fig, loner Gorgug, snooty Fabian)

My point this morning is that the concept was Magic Breakfast Club but it evolved into modern Fantasy. Not saying that's a bad thing, I was just thinking about how has the vibe changed so much from the original idea?

And then I remember that in episode 3 of the first season, Ally Beardsley invented PrayerChain. Which could have been some instant messaging system but Emily and Brennan immediately follow it up with making GIFs Canon in this universe.

As a table full of comedians making a show, they cannot help following a bit. That's why the funniest moments of the show come from Ally's anachronistic references.

But I think the big one that changed the concept from 80s movie to modern Fantasy is during "Family in Flames" when everyone's separated, their homes and loved ones in danger, Adaine and Kristen stay behind for one last break in the case,

And Kristen straight up calls and Uber.

That moment was what sent me on this train because in what 80s world are the high school kids calling an Uber or taxi? It's always "the one with the car" or "everyone has a bike" to travel around town. I think from here and with all the anachronistic references that Ally made all season really cemented Solace as Modern Fantasy and not 80s Nostalgia.

I saw some posts on here about how Riz was the Main Charecter of the show because every Villain of the season had some Personal Beef with him.

I think Ally Beardsley, the person, not Kristen Applebees or K2, is the main charecter of the Fantasy High Universe

What's even better about this is that THEY WERENT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE THERE. I can't look it up right now cos I'm locked in, but everyone jokes about how Ally had never played DND before the show, I think they were a last minute edition to the cast.

And literally from that one change the show is completely different from what it would have been. Well, it would have been different if any of the Intrepid Heroes were switched out, but I think with Ally in the cast the world of Spyre was turned on its head.

If the Intrepid Heros had pokemon types, Ally was the more Comedian/Actor type at College Humor while everyone else and Brennan were Comedian/Writer/Geek type. Most of Ally's content outside of D20 was Total Forgiveness and that show where they smoked weed (loved it, can't look it up rn)

Compare that to Brennan, who started as an Um Actually writer, Lou and Siobahn, who are Geeks/have been playing DND for a long time, Zac, who i cannot find much Geek content for, and Emily and Murph, who need no introduction (i dunno if NADDPOD started before D20)

The addition of Ally Beardsley to the cast not only drove the show so far away from the concept that most people forget what it was supposed to be, but it did so in a way that made the show so much better than they had even planned for.

This Pride month, I salute Ally Beardsley

🫡

(It took me an hour to write this, good night ya'lll)

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #d20 #ally beardsley

[ghirganatik]

out of all the team bucci members, narancia and fugo have the most potential imo

like

idk how to explain it but given how their backstories are set up, their personalities etc, I just feel like you could put these two as a protagonist in one series and it'd work. Because idk man, out of everyone else, narancia and fugo's characters felt like they weren't done.

im not saying those two are horribly written characters ofc, dude i literally wrote a 9 page essay on narancia's character dynamics and submitted it to a writing organization last year. but kind of in a sense like, you can envision their character growth, you see POTENTIAL in their characters.

Fugo's whole anger problem + his characterization in PHF (FUGO ENTHUSIASTS IM SO SORRY IF I CANT EXPOUND ON THIS FURTHER ANYMORE BUT U GET WHAT I MEAN RIGHT) can be expounded on further, id watch a series around him tbh

oh and Narancia. sweet, sweet NARANCIA. His whole scene of him swimming to the boat, making a decision for himself after following orders for such a long time felt like a CHARACTER SETUP. You see, Narancia has 'youth' as one of his character themes, from his appearance, demeanor, backstory, EVEN HIS GODDAMN STAND. So watching him in VA, it kind of just gave me a sense that I wanted to see Narancia develop further, I wanted to see him grow, both in a moral and physical sense.

in one of the weiss schwarz cards, one of narancia's cards is labelled along the lines of "pioneering his own path", now I want to see him and his journey along that path.

#to solve for this i acc wrote a trilogy based on narancia alone but im speaking from a general sense here #marsposting #golden wind #jojo part 5 #pannacotta fugo #narancia ghirga #SORRY FOR THE NARANCIA YAPPING #narancia

[desertsfic]

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) wanna share those onions?

(in reference to me saying i have a lot of "onions" which are like opinions, but better, and often times, have layers (y'know, an ogre, perhaps) about alpha dave and his opinions on bro)

Yes, PC, I will share my onions with you. ONCE!!!!!!!!

Okay to start I want to apologize because I'm going to talk about their personalities again. A lot probably. And also apologize to you because we are buddies so I'm going to try to sound less ???? idk i never actually sound academic just slightly unhinged but because we're friends I am going to sound slightly MORE unhinged than usual because i feel weird talking about this lol (WARNING: i'm talking about abuse again who is surprised but also apologies.)

ANYWAY.

TO START: We can refresh and go over the Dave vs Dave vs Bro debate if you want but there is also the Director's Cut on Ch 45 which i feel like covers a lot of the way that the Guardians tend towards thinking of their counterparts as themselves and therefore (at the beginning) have a tendency to treat them as Less-Than-People lol.

NOW.

I mean I think it is pretty clear at first that Dave (we're just going to call him Dave here sorry but assume i mean A!Dave unless i say otherwise) really truly just points right at him and goes "This is Dirk."

He doesn't super know what that means yet like he's got that funky instinct there's a jam in the radio signal in his brain but he knows, the way a guardian is supposed to, that This is Dirk.

but he also perceives him as a threat. I think that is my second favorite thing about their relationship. There is a mutual "oh this dude would fucking eviscerate me huh" between them.

Fortunate for us, then, that Dave is slightly deranged, high on life, and more than a little determined to make Bro his new friend.

I think that there is probably a point where Dave gave up his Hollywood glamor, his persona, his facade, because he did not need it anymore, or he only put it on for special occasions, but I think it's an easy routine for him to slip into, and I think that seeing Bro here, this fucked up concept of Bro-Dude-Irony-And-The-Sincerity-Beneath-It he is so perplexed and somehow jealous he's just like

oh my god he's ridiculous

oh my god i HAVE to know more i think this man might be insane

We're not getting into Dave's Oedipal complex. The jokes write themselves, I am merely the pen through which they flow.

I do think that finding out that Bro died is something like a gut-punch to him. Like there is always going to be a part of him that screams "Failure" at the aspect of his kid (no matter how big, shitty, and disconnected from him) dying, and the fact that Bro is three years younger than he should be in 2012 will always be a reminder of that.

Moving on.

For the sake of this becoming googly doc length, Fairly quickly he finds out that this dude is not just A Dirk but is in fact kind of fucked up. Like, varying levels of fucked up depending on the day but still fucked up. But he doesn't want to admit that he's off because that would mean admitting that Rose is right and he IS in over his head, and it makes it more frustrating and honestly a little heartbreaking the more he gets to know Bro, and when he finds out about the way beta session Dave was raised, in Ch 43.

So okay.

Here is where I sound like a dick.

Here is where I think I might get in trouble with people but like.

I think a lot of people expect Dave to go off on Bro about this, or like, beat him up or some shit idk. I've seen all sorts of things get said but you know the thing is,

The thing is we don't really know much about how Bro and Alpha Dave grew up? and at least in this case, and it's kind of hard to explain because i'm not excusing it but i'm not sure we can rule out the concept that the relationship between Dirk and a!Dave would have been, if Dave had raised Dirk, complicated after all. Would Dave have trained Dirk to use a sword? he didn't have Cal so surely even if he had it wouldn't have been that bad but at the same time what makes teaching someone to use their Strife Specibus "okay" vs "not okay"? Whatever Mom and Rose had going on was a fucking nightmare, and beyond John and Dad fighting with shaving cream and cake, everything else looks??? super fucking bad lol

Anyway so I guess I do wonder to a point, what he would think, in that scenario

but we are not in that scenario

the scenario we are in is that a survivor of a hostile alien takeover (though can we call him a survivor if he died?) is confronted with the fact that the alternate version of someone he considers to be his kid, abused a kid version of him, was cruel and unkind and unforgiving in all aspects of their relationship.

But that's a hard fucking thing to grasp. That's a hard concept to tackle because at this point, we have a dude who has watched people die, who has killed people, who hasn't even SEEN a kid due to the condesce and all her weird shit I guess idk i don't remember canon, whatever, in YEARS, probably, so what does it mean to him that a kid who he doesn't even know beyond his own point of reference, himself, suffered at the hands of a Dirk?

Like, how do you grapple with that? Does he have the right to be mad? IS he mad? does it make him angry? or does it make him pity them both, to a point. Is he angry, but frustrated, beyond that, because it's so fucking obvious that both of them are miserable, and later, when he pushes Bro over it, and Bro basically says he doesn't WANT to do it again but that he would do whatever was necessary for the timeline, does THAT make him mad not because Bro is excusing his behavior but because he won't even fucking admit that he actively chose a decision that hurt himself the most??

I don't even know if he'd be protective over Dave or DS for it. Tbh I don't really think so. Neither of them particularly like him, and it's clear at this point, to Dave, that they are both hanging their little hopes on the Get Bro Better program lol. I don't even think A!Dave WOULD do anything unless possibly DIRK asked him to. because. waves hand at complicated Dave vs Dave bullshit. Like, Dave's happiness fully hinges on Dirk's happiness. If Dirk wanted him to do something, he would. but he doesn't. So he never will.

Shittily, to quote myself, "Bro Strider is not a good man, or wasn’t a good man, but for whatever fucked up reason, your kid cannot rest until he learns to redeem himself. However long that takes."

Idk. it's complicated. I think a part of him really resents Bro for it, because he DID have the an opportunity to grow up with Dave, something he never had, he never even got the CHOICE, and he fucked it up so irreparably that none of them will be able to take it back, not ever ever ever. He had the opportunity to love his kid and be loved by his kid and he fucked it up. It's not FAIR. None of what Sburb handed them was FAIR but Bro made the worst choice and it impacted them both so fucking bad that it rippled through the timeline, and now Dave has to deal with Dirk feeling responsible for something he didn't even DO. it's just. a lot.

What would beating up Bro accomplish? Killing him? Nothing, because he thinks he deserves it, because it's what he wants, because it's the easier way out.

I don't feel like I need to outright spell out that Lil Cal is basically an allegory for substance abuse in this scenario but. I also won't let us excuse Bro's actions as "Not Him" because of something as flimsy as "mind control" lol.

The whole point is that Bro is a Dirk, and he is a Dirk in the most extreme way (this is all part 2 stuff but like. C'mon. it's relevant, i know you know that). He is a version of Dirk who was bent cruel and believed so much more in fulfilling his own vision that he didn't stop think about the consequences. Or maybe he did, maybe he didn't care. We don't know. It's a lot. It's a whole lot all the time.

So where does that leave us? Where does that leave them?

Basically, I don't think David in this scenario has any right at all to properly judge Bro like some kind of fucking, court room drama. I just don't see that in the cards, man.

I do think that from Dave's perspective there is a level of "we have both done bad things for a purpose we assumed was greater" which is not necessarily healthy, but unfortunately rings true, a certain amount. He sees the similarities between them. That is part of the reason they get along so well, I think. There is a level of understanding that they are not who they used to be, or are trying to be different now, and more than that Dave, fucked up as it is, believes in him. and I think Bro needs this weird, semi-uncomplicated relationship with a Dave who he has not hurt before, who knows he's fucked up, but wants to be around him anyway, but without all the baggage.

It's not perfect, of course, and they still run into a lot of infuriating walls of horseshit, but I do think that Dave genuinely likes him, and believes he can be better, too, if he just puts in some serious fucking effort for once, jesus christ.

So that is just like. The bare minimum of my onions on their relationship. yes.

#LITERALLY could write an essay but this is like. #the basic shit #i'm posting this late enough i hope no one sees it i'm sorry #cw child abuse discussions and such #bro strider makes my life very complicated all the time haha #the run and go fic #yeeeeppp haha nervous laugh

[allthecastlesonclouds]

hi something something bad kids all magic users now something something everyone learning how to save each other something something they've all got friendship bracelets and they're gonna make it through this year if it KILLS them

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #riz gukgak #fhjy #kristen applebees #fig faeth #the bad kids #I HAVE WANTED 6/6 MAGIC BAD KIDS SO LONG. ALMOST SCREAMED. #and i'm talking i guess #but like. riz switching to arcane trickster to be better in combat. #fig learning revivify and other non-bard-centric spells because she's afraid of what will happen if kristen goes down. #kristen better studying her own magic to figure out how she could've saved everyone before and deciding never again. #the first thing gorgug does with artificer magicTM is healing the hangman and 3 of his 4 spells are literally to save something/someone #adaine expanding her magical pallette. fabian reaching out to each of his friends. i could write an essay i LOVE them

[courtrecord]

honestly i hate how that “maybe the curtains are just blue” post has become shorthand for anti-intellectualism and shit bc as someone who has an utter passion for media analysis now, I WAS THAT PERSON IN HIGH SCHOOL ENGLISH CLASS.

english class never taught me how to analyze stories, it taught me how to remember what things the teacher said were “symbolism” and how to take quizzes where we had to match a quote to the character who said it. i didn’t give a shit about any of it, bc literally why should i. it was bullshit.

there’s this idea online that people are forgetting or rejecting what they learned in english class when they’re bad at media analysis, and maybe that’s a little bit true, but i think the much bigger problem is they never learned it in the first place. cinemasins & “maybe the curtains are just blue” aren’t convincing people to abandon an intellectualism they already had, they’re filling a void.

when all you learn in high school is to write on the test “blue = depression”, why is it surprising that so many people don’t give a shit about the curtains.

#media analysis #i literally didn’t care about criticism until i started watching video essays in 2017 #and they taught me that u could actually do interesting things with analysis #and i cannot fucking stand this shit that pretends people should all know better #also it’s not new; people who act like media literacy is getting worse are so fucking funny like #have u met an adult. have u spoken to say. an adult family member #ever in ur life #ur just on the internet now. ur seeing a million bad takes that used to be reserved for in-person conversations #or maybe writing into a paper or magazine #get real #get fucking real #1k

[lover-of-mine]

Buddie Countdown to Season 7:

17 days.

#911 #buddie #911edit #buddieedit #911 on fox #911 fox #911 abc #evanbuckleyedit #eddiediazedit #my edit #buddies7 #911hiatus2023 #otp: you don't need to pretend with me #usercam #oh i could write essays about this scene alone #every aspect of it is so intentional it makes me want to scream #the framing the wording the back and forth where we are getting their reactions to what the other is saying #the way its a literal representation of the conflict between them #like legit even the way they are shown in the frame in specific points says so so so so so much #ugh #let them fight again please #a make up scene between them now would be SO GOOD #911verse #evan buckley #eddie diaz

[wildfloweronwheels]

Just sitting here thinking about how the surprise song section is the new version of the arm lyrics and what a flex it is that she now has enough music to give us real time insight into her emotional state using only her own words and not other people’s.

#taylor swift #eras tour #seeing them typed out as a list is like getting a guided tour through her brain #heartbreak processed in real time #this is what happens when you learn to feel your feelings as they come up #could literally write an essay on how they all pair together #hannah post™️

[doverstar]

when I explain to you that Ten is the equivalent of Enamored Smurf in the Doctor lineup

#his entire regeneration is built for passion #he was born out of love for one specific human girl and as a result he is constantly - no pun intended - at a ten emotions-wise #he is like. that one care bear whose entire purpose is love? but without the girl he regenerated for it kinda goes haywire #he's the doctor who kisses ALL of his companions think about that. he flirts with every female with a pulse. all that romantic energy. #just. zooming around everywhere with nothing to land on after Rose gets ripped away #it's hilarious and very sad. and annoying #when he's angry he's FURIOUS. when he's sad he's MISERABLE. when he's happy he's INFECTIOUS. and when he's in love? #WHEN HE'S IN LOVE DO NOT GET CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIRE #the man literally wants to die when the human girl he was born out of love for is unreachable. he welcomes death. #he goes BANANAS when they are not together. slowly but surely he's Time Lord Victorious because he literally can't cope without his love #it's ridiculous. I could go on #I might write an essay about this #if provoked* #tenth doctor #opinion piece #10th doctor #10rose #tenrose #tentoo #doctor who #dw #bbc #timepetals #ten x rose #rose tyler #rose x ten #rose x doctor #david tennant #billie piper #ten

[clownery-and-fuckery]

I dont think I'll ever get over Tech's face during his and Omega's talk.

The way he was so open and genuinely showed Omega he was hurt by her words, and thought hard to articulate what he really wanted to say. He didn't understand at first, at first it didn't make sense why she was so angry. But once he did, once he realised it why she had a hard time, he tried.

He didn't know exactly how to say it, because he's used to his brothers knowing- but you can hear him use less neutral "We'll move past this" language to "It's hard. I dont always like how i do it, but I care."

He reaffirms that he understands he doesn't have a conventional way of showing his love, but he still loves infinitely, like she does.

It makes his line "there are many like us" line mean so much more. Because this is him saying I love you. This is him showing her he looks up to his brothers- he sees them, he always looks to them and he adores them. They've always been the most important thing to him, and with Omega he learns to show that. It's beautiful, it makes me sob.

I could write so much more on him.... on this scene, on all his scenes. I am him and he is me, it's so- I can't describe how nice it is to really see yourself and know that it's okay. That people understand and even enjoy those qualities. Getting mushy but he really does hold a special place in my heart.

#not to be negative but THATS WHAT HUNTER NEEDED #anyways tech supremacy #tbb tech #sw the bad batch #the bad batch #tbb omega #i dont think this made much sense im sleepy #but i could write ESSAYS on Tech #especially this moment #ALONG WITH THE “There are many like us” #LITERALLY THE SWEETEST SHIT IVE EVER HEARD ?!!?!??!?! #ive hsutaveisbw after being shame for this for so long #knowing that those traits can be loveable really makes me cry

[sadquickchristmassnowman]

do you guys ever think about how, when troy started messing with abed in 1x05, and they have that interaction like

“because I’m barack obama’s nephew”

“why are you telling me all this now?”

“I didn’t know if I could trust you. but now it’s time to tell you everything”

abed probably finally felt like he was really connecting with troy? like he was finally making a real friend? I mean troy was trusting him with his deepest secrets. to then find out that troy was just messing with him, and that those moments of percieved true friendship were just lies for entertainmemt… ouch.

and then him trying to adapt to troy’s view of friendship throughout the episode and him just being painfully wrong and going too over the top.

plus, troy’s position that “friends mess with each other” must originate from his high school experience. I’m sure he himself got messed with a lot as a kid/teenager. so, he learned to tell when people are lying for fun to him, and he learned how to do it to others. there’s a lot more to be said about that but again. Ouch!!!

I mean, of course it all ends well, with troy realizing that friendships don’t have to be built on surface-level pranks, and abed realizing that troy had been a real friend all along… and just them both realizing that they do genuinely care about each other, and that they’re each different from any other friend or acquaintance they’d ever had before. but yeah.

and this is all literally episode FIVE. stop it

#plus this is literally their first storyline together. shdhdjdjd #they’re just constantly teaching each other that having friends doesn’t have to always be like it once was!!! #that there’s so much more to life than what they each experienced in high school! #plus I could write a whole essay about how troy’s experiences are kind of overlooked. like I know he was a popular jock but #high school him definitely has a lot more depth than that and idc if it’s not technically canon. put me in the writers’ room #(after the strike is over obviously hashtag pay the writers) #anyway. I love gay people!!! #community #nbc community #community nbc #abed nadir #troy barnes #trobed #troy and abed

[daz4i]

wait so chuuya has angel imagery about him in stormbringer. and dazai is referred to as a demon on more than one occasion. and. hold on. wait. I'm going insane. hold on.

#don't try to figure out the grammar of this post I'm too lazy and having too many thoughts for that rn. #ANYWAY are they literally an angel/demon ship. in a way. bc if so. the dan rights are insane #I've been thinking abt this for awhile idk why it took me so long to post abt it #I'm ngl demon dazai as a concept is already enough to give me rights personally he truly is just like me fr #and . you know how insane i am abt angels. tbh chuuya would make a really good angel he's loyal and has humanity issues doesn't he. #also he is a Fucked Up Creature :) love that about him. but yeah that's another part of it #i wish there was like. more of that. more than just that one time symbolism. i need more. so i can write an essay abt angel chuuya #(if there is and i just missed it PLEASE send it my way. i am asking nicely 🔫) #(ig you could argue he's like an angel saving the ada in this arc but... eh that's not direct enough for me)

[ltcommandershepard]

hate it when in the year of our lord 2023 people who claim to be "fans" of fenris still characterize him as a "broody aggressive a**hole" who mindlessly hates all mages and communicates by snarling and grunting at the other companions... buddy boy we don't have time to unpack all that but it sure is funny that people choose to take a well spoken abuse victim and act like he's a wild animal

#dragon age #fenris #fandom critical #“how dare anders call fenris a wild dog” #*proceeds to describe fenris snarling and growling in every fic and post* #can't really complain about anders calling him names when you literally describe him acting Like That #i could write an essay on this #lmao

[junipum]

i love gay people i wish they were real

#house md #gregory house #james wilson #hilson #they're my monthly ship hyperfixation and for good reason #there's so much to unpack with these two #like literally #i could write an essay

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

miles + looking at alex during photoshoots

#i could write entire essays about the way miles looks at him 🥺 #there are just so many layers #so much love and deep affection and reverent fascination #so much joy #it’s like #you can literally just see the sheer delight and elation miles is feeling at being there with him #at knowing him #at the existence of their friendship #that wonderment and almost disbelief at the profundity of their connection #aghhhhh #i’m making myself emotional i’m going to stop now #milex #miles kane #alex turner #tlsp #the last shadow puppets #lulu posts

[autistic-bashir]

queerness in modern trek is too sanitized and palatable for straight audiences. old trek had two separate instances where a guy rolls around on the floor with his guy buddy having been driven into an insurmountable rage by a temporary medical condition that’s not his fault… now that’s a homosexual agenda bring that back

#one of those posts where im running on four hours of sleep #could literally write an essay on this like #this is a joke obviously but ahahaha yeah um #anyways lower decks your chance is now #star trek