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mcclainwilla · 7 months

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Writing Fight Scenes Part 7 - Basic Ground-fighting Terminology

So a lot of what you see in movies is (bedazzled, unrealistic) stand-up fighting/sparring that involves things like punches and kicks. But the reality is, most fights don't remain 'on their feet.' In this post, I'm going to talk about why most realistic fights go to the ground, the goals of ground-fighting, and some basic terminology

Before that, I should mention that I am going to be speaking from a grappling perspective. Grappling and Brazilian Jiu Jitsu are very similar martial arts, the main difference being the fact that bjj is usually performed while wearing a gi. I've always found this impractical, as many of the submissions (I'll explain this term in a minute) that rely on clothing are difficult to execute if a character's opponent is wearing civilian clothing

Importance of grappling

Above all else, a character who is good at fighting will know how to grapple because it is far easier to fall than it is to stand back up. A character loses their footing? Gets tackled/tripped? Catches a fist to the face? They're going to the ground. On the other hand, once a character is on the ground, their opponent might not be so kind as to allow them back to their feet. So, what do they do?

Goals of grappling

Returning to standing position

Like I just said, it's quite hard for a character to come back to their feet after they've hit the ground, but it can be done. A character would want to 1. Create space from their opponent, 2. Move quickly (to avoid giving their opponent the chance to stop them) and 3. Protect their head, especially if their opponent is still on their feet

Pummeling/TKO/Knockout

TKO, by the way, stands for 'technical knockout,' and describes an instance where an opponent is deemed unable to fight back even while conscious, usually due to an incessant beating. If two characters are grappling, one can maneuver into a favorable position (like sitting on the chest) and just beat the shit out of the other. This is great if you have a more brutish character because the most technical part is getting into a good position

Submission

These are a little trickier to describe, because there's a lot of them. The goal of a submission is to either force an opponent to submit (no shit, right?) or to forcibly stop a fight by knocking them unconscious/breaking something. The two main categories are chokes and breaks

Chokes:

Blood chokes - these aren't as scary as they sound. They target the veins/arteries on either side of the throat to stop the flow of blood to the brain. They take hold pretty quickly but typically don't hurt at all, unless you pass out I guess

Air chokes - these are illegal in the ufc, because you can easily do damage to the throat structures. As you might guess, your character is just squeezing the hell out of the actual column of an opponent's throat. Also, they take longer to set in. Only let your character perform an air choke if they're a massive cunt/out for blood

Breaks:

This is actually another umbrella term. In reality, there are actual breaks, and then dislocations, hyperextensions, cranks/bars, and some that fall into multiple categories

Breaks - you guessed it, your character breaks bone. The most common ones are wrist, arm, elbow and knee (these two also fall into the hyperextension category), leg and ankle breaks. I've broken too many of my own bones to enjoy writing OR reading these, so

Dislocations - again, pretty self-explanatory. Shoulder and knee dislocations take precedence. Gross

Hyperextensions - mostly elbows and knees. Disgusting

Cranks/bars - this is the one I think I need to explain the most. Cranks aim to fuck up muscles, tendons and ligaments by wrenching joints beyond their normal mobilities. I see the most shoulder and knee cranks. Whump writers, you'll love these because you can go slow, drag it out. That being said, if you make me read that, I will show up in your backyard

Basic Terminology

So I already got some terms out of the way, but grappling is a whole different world than stand-up fighting. Have y'all ever heard 'jiu jitsu is gay' jokes? They're right actually

Rolling - the actual act of grappling with someone, usually for practice. It is NOT out of the ordinary for a character who does martial arts to say to their buddy, 'hey, you wanna roll?'

Clinch - 'the clinch' is kind of an intermediary stage between stand-up fighting and grappling wherein a character and their opponent are still on their feet, but they're holding onto each other. It kinda looks like a dynamic hug tbh, but really, they're fighting for a more advantageous position, so that a given character can knock their opponent to the ground

Mount - one character is flat on their back while the other straddles their chest. Ideally, the character on top (dominant position) would either sit high on their opponent's chest/collarbones, or they would sit directly on the diaphragm and squeeze with their knees

Guard - one character is flat on their back with their legs crossed around the other character's torso, who has their knees slightly spread for balance. The character on the bottom has the advantage if they can trap and pull their opponent's face to their chest, and cross their ankles high on their opponent's back. Conversely, the character on top has the advantage if they can sit up as straight as possible

Half-guard - think scissoring, almost. One character on their back/side and one sitting/kneeling upright, each with one of the other's legs crossed between their own. Same rules for advantage as guard. I don't really like this position because I don't like having my legs tangled up, it's too easy for my opponent to try a knee bar

Side control - one character flat on their back (preferably with their knees bent upwards) and the other laying on them perpendicularly, face-down. The idea here is to be as heavy as possible, to stop the character on the bottom from moving. Female characters want to press using the weight of their hips, male characters want to press using the weight of their chest; to trap a female character, lay closer to the hips, and to trap a male character, lay on the chest.

Rear mount - actually not as terrible as it sounds! Both characters on their asses, one behind the other with their arms wrapped around the torso/the ankles hooked behind the knees. DO NOT let your character cross their ankles when they are the one behind, holding their opponent. It is an EXCELLENT way to end up with broken legs (don't worry abt why)

North-south - ...69. I hate this one too, it's way too easy to get my knee fucked with

I hope this was helpful, and if not helpful, at least amusing. I guess the idea of this post was to give you some key words to google, in case you want to do more in-depth research (i.e you want your character to perform a cool submission but have no idea where to start looking)

Unimportant but funny aside, my old instructors accidentally came up with a blood choke where you literally use your face to choke someone tf out. They call it The Hickey

#writing #writing advice #fight scene #wip #wip stuff #martial arts #writing tips and tricks #writing help #writing fight scenes #willa mcclain

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alto-angel · 4 years

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in this post, i would like to present my thesis on why the song metaphor by the crane wives belongs to goro akechi.

"i've gotten good at leaning on metaphors": goro's speech as the detective prince is very flowery, exaggerated, and calculated, in order to please the crowds of people with their eyes trained on him at all times. public appearances, television shows, and interviews are all very important for his image, and as such he's forced to adapt his speech and choose his wording carefully to appease those watching. robbie daymond especially does a very good job of vocally pushing the line of politeness into a tone that sounds just a bit too sugary to be genuine, but not something u would notice unless u were listening closely.

"i've gotten good at living on someone else's page": much like the first line, this one can also refer to goro's public image. because he's put an immense amount of work into his life as the detective prince, he aims to please. or at least, he needs to act as though he does. in order to keep up appearances, he needs to be able to get a read of those around him and keep himself on the same wavelength as them. this also applies to shido—not only does goro need to please his fans, but shido as well, in order to stay one step ahead of him. goro is purposefully putting himself on eggshells every day of his life, and in order to keep that up as well as keep himself safe, this is what he has to practice.

"i cut my teeth on secondhand sentiments": goro is often forced to follow a script, or at least an embellished, public-friendly version of his own thoughts. the things that he says when acting as the detective prince are rarely ever his own thoughts as they would be presented in normal conversation. goro has to hide his true opinion of the phantom thieves behind crowd pleasing buzzwords, keep up appearances by catering his opinions, and even quotes philosophers and other literature ("to paraphrase hegel"). the things that he says as detective prince goro akechi are rarely ever entirely his own, and he's gotten very good at tailoring his speech.

"you can't trust a single thing i say": this one, i think, is fairly self-explanatory. the "you" doesn't just apply to the phantom thieves, but to those goro works with as well. what is it he says to sae; "to trick your enemies, you must first trick your allies"? he uses deception to get what he wants, but his primary motivation for it is to move his plan forward, and to protect himself. obviously, if he were honest with shido, he would've been killed on the spot. goro's proficiency with lies isn't just a tool he uses, but a defense mechanism as well. bc of his fear of and difficulty grasping the concept of opening up to someone, through that skill, he is able to keep himself closed off and in control (that is, until he meets akira).

"i keep my closet free of skeletons": this one strikes me as irony, personally. goro's closet is so full of skeletons that it's practically bursting at the seams. but as the detective prince, something like that just isn't allowed. he needs to play the part, otherwise he pays the price. as himself, as goro akechi, he's got so many skeletons in his closet that he probably can't open the door anymore. but as the detective prince, he has to uphold an air of perfection that seems unattainable to others. goro as the detective prince is the epitome of the culture behind the idolization of celebrities, and the way others place and expect them on pedestals of something near godhood, far above the rest of the world.

"cause i'm much better at digging graves": well, goro akechi is certainly no stranger to the art of killing someone without a trace. we have no idea how many shutdowns or breakdowns he induced over the course of his professional relationship with shido. but i also think this lyric in tandem with the one right before it could relate to goro's tendencies towards repression; the idea that he cannot and should not have any "demons" or "skeletons"—such as past traumas, meaningful relationships, or feelings that he's jammed down and shut the closet doors on, if u will—bc since vengeance is his only objective, then digging graves is his primary task, or the only thing he's good for, in his mind. the word skeletons doesn't have to represent mistakes specifically, but could also refer to how goro views his own heart and how he deals with his emotions. something like, he feels he shouldn't deal with all that turbulence, bc he's far better at warping it into anger—something that he's used to dealing with, and can easily rationalize. the more complicated emotions, not so much.

"but i always dig up bones in your sympathy": this is where i start connecting things to goro and akira specifically. another definition of sympathy entails two people who share an understanding of each other. doesn't that sound like goro and akira to u? so, if u take these lyrics to be from goro to akira, it feels to me like this one could represent his regrets/desire to leave his situation. according to rank seven of his confidant in royal, we know that goro is practically screaming for help before the events of sae's palace. unfortunately, as the player, we are not able to save him. but i think this lyric could represent his desire to connect with akira despite his better judgement—"dig up bones," as in; i'll still arrive at the decision to bury them in the first place, but bc we have an understanding, i'll show u as well as i can that i do not want to be doing this. and that's exactly how rank seven with goro plays out, through the metaphor of a billiards game.

"i can't trust a single thing you say": this could refer to the fact that both goro and akira are withholding truths from each other throughout their relationship, and since they are of equal standing, the same deception that applies to goro would apply to akira as well, albiet in a far different way. however, i can also see it as an unwillingness on goro's part; he feels as though he cannot trust akira not bc akira is truly lying to him, but bc there's no other way for him to rationalize the fact that akira cares for him and wants to spend time with him. as goro akechi, not the detective prince. goro can't trust the kindness akira extends to him not only bc he's used to conditional love (shido, foster parents, etc.), but also bc he doesn't feel as though he deserves it. goro does not have a very high image of himself, as we see later on, and it's easy to see throughout his confidant that he cannot quite understand why someone would want to spend time with him, and not the perfectly crafted version of him that he presents to everyone else.

"don't look too hard, cause you won't like the scars he left in me": the "he" here refers to shido. shido is the sole reason for all of goro's trauma and hardships. he has scarred goro more than anyone else in his life. and goro's sharing of these traumas is very limited: he opens up seemingly out of nowhere, before immediately retreating under the guise of things like "oh, that isn't like me," or "oh, am i bothering u?" such as the scenes that take place in leblanc and the bathhouse. goro cannot fathom the fact that someone (akira) would wish to get to know him, as he is, so he assumes that a normal interaction between friends is somehow too much transparency, and keeps himself at a distance. he mistakes his feelings for akira as hatred, right? obviously, that's entirely the wrong word to describe them. but if goro himself believes that he hates akira, he would likely believe akira to hate him as well; as evidenced by the fact that the dialogue options which give u the most points are the ones where u mention ur "rivalry"—bc again, goro cannot rationalize his emotions as anything other than negative; anger, hatred, etc. it's far easier for goro to blurt out the words "i hate u" rather than "i love u," or "i care for u," isn't it? and this is how he keeps himself at enough of a distance, although simultaneously feels himself drawing closer. emotional closeness is not something goro is well versed in, and bc goro has built his image on being talented and skilled, he refuses to reveal his shortcomings.

"i've gotten good at making up metaphors": the words here are only slightly different than the ones at the beginning, which i think works for goro's further descent into his deal with shido, and subsequent difficulty. instead of "leaning" on metaphors, he's completely making them up. it's more drastic, which could represent a sort of desperation. almost as if he's losing his touch—which we do see after the events of sae's palace, during the tv interview where he monologues internally about his backstory, and we start to really see how damaged he is. goro is frazzled and distraught, enough for it to visibly show, something he prided himself on being able to avoid.

"i've gotten good at stretching the truth out of shape": again, the same situation as before. similar to the beginning, with slightly harsher wording. the lies that goro is immersing himself in are getting more intense, and almost impossible to separate from. his "murder" of akira is a turning point, in a way; akira is the first and only character we see goro kill in what he believes to be outside of the metaverse. he's not only stretching the truth out of shape, but he himself is bent out of shape as well—this stuck out to me on my ng+ run; his sprites in the scene just after akira is reported to be dead from him to shido are very unsettling and absent, as if he's almost completely zoning out. it's a very jarring scene to watch, and i think at least part of that has to be due to the severity of his actions.

"and all these words are sweet and meaningless": this feels to me, if we're going by the timeline i've been suggesting throughout all this, like it's directed at shido. now that akira is dead and the phantom thieves are no longer a threat to goro's plan for revenge, he can focus his energy back on his original objective. goro lays it on incredibly thick in his scenes with shido, so much so that it sometime surprises me that he didn't realize shido was onto him. again with the more intense wording here, which fits with the events i'm corresponding it with.

"you can't trust a single thing i say": now this wording is exactly the same as the first time, but given the progression of everything i've talked about, i take this as a sort of last word to both shido and akira. goro intends to follow through with his vengeance no matter the cost, and this could read as a final nail in that coffin. the song repeats this lyric four times, as well. if i wanted to keep it up all the way up to the engine room scene, and go completely off the rails in the process, i could say that the first iteration of this line is an affirmation to both shido and akira that his revenge takes precedence, therefore it would be stupid to trust him. the second is an affirmation to himself that he is in fact doing the right thing, and everything will pay off in the end, that this is just the way things are supposed to be, as always. the third is a kind of plea, born from confusion, after he's defeated by the theives and they offer to bring him with them to take down shido, an offer he cannot fathom the reason for extending. a sort of "why would u trust me" in the form of "u shouldn't trust me." and the fourth would refer directly to goro speaking to his cognitive self; as he decieves the deciever, making it seem as though he is running back to shido only to close the bulkhead door and resign himself to his "noble" sacrifice.

i hope at least some of this makes any semblance of sense. put this song on ur goro playlists, goroboys.

#persona #persona 5 #persona 5 royal #p5 #p5r #goro akechi #character analysis

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guigz1-coldwar · 3 years

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'Troubles at the Pines' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

"Troubles at the Pines"

Chapter Summary : Yirina, along with Park & Adler, is going to face Stitch at Mall of the Pines.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +4300

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Seeing Hudson face after all these times and seeing him acting like Adler did in my first days back in the safehouse, I can say that everything was starting all over again....with me, trying to make sure that I'm no longer seen as an terrorist, as an Perseus agent. Of course, with that coming back, my anger was with it too, letting myself a little bit overreacting when Adler taunted me about sarcasm and to be honest, I really think that sarcasm was something helping me to not let my rage get in control of me......and that's happening a lot of time with Adler & Hudson.

We needed a bigger plan than just 'broke in and kill Stitch for good' like Adler explained to us but even if he finally agreed to planify our moves inside the mall.....it wasn't still a bigger plan we had : we just added 'separate in teams' to the original plan and Adler been Adler, he refused to lose time and we quickly had to prepare ourselves for the mission as Stitch wanted his plans to occur, according to Adler, in the night of the same day.

Weirdly, Adler wouldn't agree to let Mason, Woods & Sims to participe in the operation and frankly, I wonder why that and even if they were trying to protest along with us, he didn't want to hear it. Instead, me & Park was obliged to go with Adler, Zeyna & Bulldozer as part of their own team and it wasn't the time to argue with that. Once we were ready, we got into a military truck and we were on our way to 'Mall at the Pines' as it was called. Part of my equipment were given to me by either Park or Adler himself.

"So....Grigoriev, right ?" Zeyna called me out while I was checking the Krig 6 I was given as we were in the truck, our seats facing each other with Park at my side and Zeyna having Jones & Adler next to her. I nodded to her, putting the gun on my lap. "Where are you from ?" She asked me.

"I'm from Ukraine." I replied as I was wondering what questions she wanted to give me, given to her curious look.

"Really ? Even if the name is Ukrainian, you're sounding very british." She muttered.....I can thanks Park for that accent I still got.....

"I've been working for the MI6 for years now and....." I started to say before looking at Park " I was very influenced by them." I added, grinning. It was just like when I told Wolf of my 'story' but this time, Adler was there to assist the conversation and when I looked at him, I could see on his face that hell will be on that truck if the truth was on the air, he needed himself to cover that.

"Grigoriev helped us by a lot." Adler exclaimed, lying him too, he was in his element to be honest. "She worked with me as we stopped Greenlight along with Park." He added, having a neutral face on me & Park.

"After that, she joined me to work inside the MI6." Park intervened at my side and I looked at her with an smile. On her face, I could see that it was hurting her again to lie about the long 3 years I wasn't really there.

"You didn't stay to work with us ?" Bulldozer scoffed, his voice muffled as he was now wearing his riot helmet on him. "Are there something you didn't like ?"

"Let's just say that the CIA wasn't so good with me in some ways." I joked, giving to Adler a look that could be described as an warning to him, knowing that at any moment, I can change my mind and finish the job with him.

"Oh, that's why Hudson were like pissed off when he saw you ?" Zeyna asked and I nodded again.

"Hudson isn't the type of person that will put his trust on people that aren't americans." Park said, looking at Adler too. "I can talk about this by a lot." She whispered likely to herself.

"Never like the guy anyways." Bulldozer snorted, everyone must be hating Hudson on something and all for a good reason. "Still forced to work with him however."

"We had to, Hudson authority can't be contested at all." Adler told him, having heard his statement.

"Even if he has to stay the dick I met 3 years ago ?" I questioned him.

"Yes." Everyone except me replied in unison to me.

"Anyway, I didn't asked but is anyone of you ever met Stitch before except for Adler ?" Zeyna wondered, looking at everyone before I slowly raised my hand.

"I did." I answered in a low voice, getting Adler attention on me.

"Wait, really ?" He was sounding very surprised by that even if he know of my status.

"Yeah." I breathed at him, looking sure of me. "I had a run-in with him in Ukraine back in my days in the KGB....a few days before I defected in January 1981." I added, mentioning the memory I had before I woke up in that base. "I broke his left arm."

"You....you broke Stitch left arm ?" Adler was again stunned by that, guess he isn't the only one who had history with Stitch. Everyone else was also like him, Park realizing that it was the memory I had in the car.

"Succeeded to corner him but I didn't have the chances to finish him before he was saved by one of Perseus." I continued, looking a little bit out of myself.

"So, Adler make him lose an eye and you broke his arm....kinda brutal !" Bulldozer admitted, having his look either on me or Adler. "You two have quite a grudge against that guy." We both nodded to him.

"If he's in the US, something big is gonna happen." Adler muttered. "Even if what we are going to do is without a plan, we need to take the risk." He affirmed his opinion on the mission before he looked outside the truck to see that we were near our destination. "Okay, get yourself ready, we arrived." We checked our guns for the last time before the truck stopped completely on the mall's parking.

I was the first one to have my feet back on the ground, soon followed by the others pretty quickly before Adler moved to adress the team that were going to support us from behind as Mason, Woods & Sims has their team taking the other side of the mall for them. Once Adler was finished, he gestured us to follow him at the entrance of the place who was blocked by numerous wooden planks.

"Bulldozer, use your hammer on that !" Adler ordered to him as Bulldozer took the hammer that was on his back.

"On it !" He complied as he moved to get to the entrance and then, he start to use his hammer to smash the planks covering the entrance. He wasn't going easy on his moves as the planks were falling one by one but the loud noises from him removed the element of surprise from us....guess there weren't any of it at all. "Finished." He said after the entrance was clear for us and to be surprised, we weren't greeted by bullets once it was done.

"Let's move inside, the support team will enter when I'll order it." Adler stepped inside the mall as we start to follow him. I rolled my eyes at it because we were literally going into the lion's den but can't back down as we were already there. "Support team, get your team ready on my signal !" He said to his radio and I could hear the chief of the other team agreeing to it from mine.

The first thing we started to do once we got in was to have our guns pointed in all the directions, wondering why nobody was there to attack us like that after we did a lot of noises. The first part of the mall was pretty silent and that wasn't normal if Stitch got his base planted here, he couldn't be silent like that, something in here was very off. In my head, I was thinking about what will Stitch will say when he will saw my face as I have nothing to cover it : the last time I saw him....I broke his left arm.....was it really the last time I saw him before Turkey ?

Park, on her side was trying to keep her cool as we were slowly advancing inside the mall, checking every corner, potentials cover and traps in case Stitch left any for us. Each step I was taking, each time I was thinking that we were going to walk straight into a hidden mine somewhere but nothing like that happened, it was more like walking straight into a damn trap and Adler know it well, we all know it well now. If we die, we all have someone to blame for that and of course, it would be Adler.

"Nothing here." Park whispered to me as we were advancing together, checking quickly a sports store as Zeyna & Bulldozer were covering from their side, a electronics store while Adler was taking the lead.

"We all going to get jumped on and we act like we don't know it." I exclaimed to her silently, keeping our voices down as Adler ordered to us. "If you lied to us, I will kill you myself, Adler." I affirmed to him, serious in my voice.

"I know that, Yirina." He said, focused on watching in front of him with his gun before we start to arrive in what was looking the center of the mall : a sort of fountain.....and in it, there were light blue barrels connected to each other with something marked in red on it until we all discovered what was those things. "Shit, he's started reproducing Nova-6." Adler lowered his gun for a second, looking at those barrels with his gun flashlight until.....

"Hands up !" We heard a man voice coming from behind a cover on top of some escalators with an assault rifle in his hand and then, it was more than just a guy as a lot of black-dressed soldiers come out of their cover in front of us and behind us....we walked right into a trap !....Thanks you, Adler !....We looked all around us, our guns still up and facing those guys.

"Is this all you got ?" Adler shouted to these guys, taunting them and worsening our own case until we heard the noise of a elevator going down just at a few steps from us.

"You had to ask !" Park told him, almost angry in her voice as she was behind me, I was aiming to those guys we first spotted with Zeyna as Park was with Bulldozer, aiming at where we came in. The elevator's door opened to reveal....Stitch himself in the same clothes in that memory with some modifications on them. He was holding a sort of shotgun in his left hand.

"Adler !" He started as Adler looked at him with deadly eyes. "You are very stupid to have fallen into my trap."

"It was the risk, I really wanted to make you lose your other eye." Adler replied, joking around with him as it wasn't the time for that, we are trapped !

"Is this what you think ?" Stitch almost laughed until he got his both hands on his gun, looking at these mens around us. "Kill the others, Adler.....is mine !" He was ready until I made a little eye contact with him just for one second and I could see on his face that he recognized me. "You....Yirina Grigoriev." He said my whole name and now....I was kinda mixed by having my name mentioned by him....I had....to play....'Bell'.

"Who is Yirina ?" I asked him, fainting to not knowing him at all, getting Zeyna incomprehesion in the process by saying that.

"On my signal, you run to hide." Adler started, whispering it to ourselves before we start to hear some gunshots inside the mall, meaning that the support team did came to our rescue a bit late. "Run !" Adler shouted as he throw two smokes grenade he was secretly holding in his hands around us and we immediately complied.

I think that I have never sprinted fast in my entire life as the bullets started to be heard in our area against us. Of course, we were all separated from that, away from Park, finding myself to run with Zeyna at my side to hide somewhere in the mall and we quickly find a cover in a store that was just a few meters from our original position before the fight started. Once we were both into that store, we moved away from the windows looking at the center of the mall to get behind in cover behind the counter of the store.

"Putain !" Zeyna cursed in french, realizing the situation we got ourselves too, checking the drum mag of her MP5. "Those bastards were awaiting for us."

"Of course, they were going to trap us." I exclaimed, trying to have a look above the counter before getting myself down back behind the counter, avoiding the bullets coming towards us. The mall really became a warzone now. "Adler knew the risk of it and now, look at where we are."

"Shit, where are the others ?" She asked before putting her hand on her radio. "Bulldozer, what's your status ? I'm with Grigoriev in a clothes store."

"I'm with Park in the electronics store just next to yours but Stitch's goons are going to overwhelm our position." He responded, firying at the same time with his gun.

"What about Adler ?" I questioned him.

"Don't know, he took another direction from us." He said before his radio got shut down like if someone attacked him and when that happened, we looked each other with Zeyna.

"Merde, we need to go join them before they got into bigger troubles." She exclaimed and for that, I couldn't agree more to it.

"I second that but...." I peaked my head a little to check at the store's state we were : filled with bullets holes and in bad shape. "We might need another exit for that."

"There !" She pointed to a side door that was maybe leading to a reserve. "We can join them by there." She added before she started to fire in the front entrance direction to kill a guy that tried to get to us.

"I'll go first, cover me !" I ordered before I start to run to get to that door.

I fired a few shots from my Krig 6 to help Zeyna before I opened the door and get myself inside the reserve of the store....to be greeted by an Perseus agent in front of me once I was inside. I tried to react quickly but he was more faster, putting his hand on my gun as I was trying to shoot him with it, getting myself into a struggle for my own gun. Unfortunately, he was more stronger than me and he managed to throw my gun away before he grabbed me by the collar and smashed me against the wall behind him.

My back was now hurting me a little from the impact and I could thanks my bulletproof vest to have protect me from the biggest part of the pain. I thought he was going to continue until he was suddenly grabbed by behind by Zeyna, having a big stick getting planted into his left feet, making him fall as Zeyna removed her stick to strike him right into the head, killing the guy and saving me from him.

"Wrong time, wrong place." She taunted to the dead man, getting her stick on her back before she moved to get to my gun. "Must be to you, je pense !" She took the gun and throw it at me gently.

"Merci." I said in french as I grabbed the gun in my hands, changing the empty mag of it before I could her, looking at me curiously.

"Didn't know you could speak french, Grigoriev." She told me, taking her MP5 in hand.

"Got myself some good skills, I can say." I didn't want to brag about myself, considering the situation we're in. "Let's go join Park & Bulldozer." I affirmed, getting ready again.

"They must be behind that door, Jones said that they were just next to us." She took the lead as we moved to get to the other door of the reserve that was certainly leading to the store they were.

When we arrived near the door, we could hear some gunshots in it and we couldn't stay here so we forced open the door, our guns ready to shoot in case. Park was fighting hand-to-hand with two Stitch's guys, getting one of them under her right arm who she broke his neck like that before she pull out a gun from her holstler, to kill the other guy with it. She was an damn expert in it and I saw it happen ! But then, a third guy that was already on the ground tried to shoot her and I was the one to react quickly, killing him in a second and making Park aware of our presence.

"Thank god, you're here." She exclaimed at us, relieved before we could see Bulldozer fighting with another goon before he took his hammer in hand, hitting the guy with the back of it right behind his head....before literally striking the guy in the jaw with the hammer, making some teeth and blood to fly away.

"Everything looks like a nail !" He said to the dead guy before he got quickly back to cover as bullets came into our direction, taking his M16 in the process. We mimicked him too, getting behind the counter with Park.

"You're alright ?" I asked her, worried as I could see a little bit of blood on her face.

"I'm okay, Yirina." She replied, getting her hand through her face to clean it from the blood she had. "Just the blood of these douchebags." She added, taking the gun she had in hands.

"Have you seen Adler ?" Zeyna asked.

"I saw him running right into the arcade but then, no more radio signals from him." She responded before she got out of cover to get next to Bulldozer who were covered just next to the store entrance.

"Our guys are slowly advancing to get here." Bulldozer explained, looking outside the store to see that the support team were near the center of the mall. "Perseus's boys are either shooting at us or them."

"And to say that Adler is alone in the arcade...." I whispered, finding out that the arcade was just at a few meters from us....having just to face bullets from Perseus soldiers. "I think I should go trying to save Adler's ass before something wrong happened to him." I suggested....was it a bad idea ?.....

"Maybe, we can cover you with our guns as you try to enter that area." Zeyna wasn't sure of it before she looked outside, in the arcade direction. "You could do it. Bulldozer, Park, be ready !" She ordered as she prepare herself to get ready to cover me.

"Be careful, Yiri." Park said silently at me, knowing the risk I'm taking now as she got herself next to Zeyna.

"I will." I replied discreetly too before I took a deep breath and squeezed my eyes, trying to think straight....finally ready.

"Go !" Zeyna got out of cover to fire, starting my run to get to the arcade.

The three opened fire at the same time as I was out of the store I was hiding with them. I started to run as fast as I can to get to the arcade, exchanging some bullets with the few guys that I was in my way until I arrived near the entrance, getting my gun reloaded, not wanting to make any mistakes in case it wasn't going to be Adler to greet me inside. I breathed and then I moved inside.

"You will soon experiment the hell on earth, Adler !" I could hear Stitch talk to Adler himself and when I fully arrived in the room, Adler was holded by two Perseus soldiers, each one by his arm as Stitch was facing him, looking sure of himself.

"Fuck you, Stitch." Adler said before he was knocked out by the guys behind him and I moved to react quickly to save Adler.

"Stitch !" I yelled at him to get his attention off Adler, ready to shot him dead....until I got myself grabbed by someone who was hidden, getting above the counter of the arcade with the same person.

"Let's get out of here, we're done here." I was able to hear Stitch starting to walk away as I was on the ground behind the counter as the person who attacked get on me, trying to control me and then, they got their knife out ready to stab me and I quickly reacted by putting my hand on their arms. I looked the masked person in the eyes and then.....Freya ?.....It was her, behind that mask.

"Yirina ?" She just realized that it was me she was going to kill....More than 1 week after the events of the Tempelhof Airport, I saw her again and inside of me, I couldn't believe myself....After all what happened, she was there with Stitch but again....I don't know but I was still forced to play 'Bell'....something that it's breaking me in the inside but I can't do something against it. She slowly removed her knife from me, allowing me to push here back with my feets before I managed to take my M1911 in hands.

"Stop calling me like that." I ordered her, aiming her but not bringing myself to shoot as she removed the hood she had on her head.

"Please, Yiri, come back with me." She pleaded, offering her hands towards me, still scared about been targeted by me.

"I don't know you for fuck sake." I exclaimed at her, angry and inside of me, starting to get more broken even if I wasn't shooting her like 'Bell' would have done. Then, she moved her hands slowly towards on her pocket "What's this ?" I asked before I could see....a ring....in her right hand.

"This...this was your mother ring, Yirina." She replied, making me look at the ring, keeping my gun in hand. "You proposed to me in September 1980 before you took back the ring in January 1981....I was able to take it back." She added....making me realize that this was the same ring I took from her in that memory....my mother ring....how ?

"How...." I was in a loss of words, thinking as 'Bell'....acting as Yirina. "I....I don't believe you." I started to breath more loudly, thinking that I was going to pass out from all of this and I was keeping my control up. "You're lying." I said in a low voice, nearly cracking.

"Please, we can go home." She slowly tried to move towards me.

"Stay back....don't....don't move, I'm not Yirina." I told her, having my gun still on her, still acting as 'Bell'

"Freya !" Someone entered the arcade as I could hear from behind the counter that I couldn't see because I was leaned against it, sit. "Freya, we need to get the hell out of here." That voice....it was that Sonya.

"Go...." I whispered to Freya, not wanting to harm even if I know more about her and what she has done to me, I couldn't do hurt her....I still feel that sister link inside of me.

"Yirina...." She breathed, still offering her hand.

"Go !" I repeated myself silently to her as she realized that she couldn't bring me back 'home' with her and that she was thinking that I wasn't 'Yirina Grigoriev' but 'Bell'. She slowly put the ring back in her pocket, holding back her own tears as I could see on her face.

"I will bring you home, Yiri. That's a promise !" She told me before she got up, putting back her hood on and then, she left without telling Sonya or anyone else that I was here, maybe going to say that she killed me to them.

When she was out of my sight, I was holding back my tears like her. I was close to crack down and to tell her everything about me when she showed my ring....the ring of my own mother that I can't even remember because I don't have any memories of my childhood. After a few seconds after Freya's departure on the ground, getting back in control, I moved to get up to see the arcade, realizing that Adler wasn't there anymore.....taken away by Stitch. I moved to get next to the outside entrance of the arcade, discovering an helicopter where Stitch and his men were bringing Adler inside of it before taking off.....I couldn't do a thing as they were too many for me to handle at all and it would have been too risky for me.

I was slowly shocked as I was getting back to the entrance I first take to enter the arcade before been greeted by Park herself who has came to see if everything was okay for me. Apparently, the fight inside the mall was finished a

"Oh my god, Yirina, you're okay ?" She first said, getting her hands on my arms and to be frankly, I couldn't nod after what happened, I wasn't okay at all so I shook my head, closing my eyes, trying to not cry and breaking down.....but I couldn't resist anymore and I fall in her arms, crying at my best....

"They took Adler away.....and Freya was there."

#black ops cold war #bocw #call of duty cold war #cod cw #cod black ops cold war #cod cold war #fanfic #helen park #fem!bell

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dominaecaede · 5 years

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Tomorrow Never Comes

Chapter 8 results: 64% chose to save Shouto now

〘 twitter 〙

The following story will have themes such as blood, gore, situations that may cause anxiety and major character death. If you are sensitive to any of these, please do not proceed.

[additional warning: hinted suicide]

Chapter 9: The Young And Hopeless

Midoriya struggled internally. He stared at Bakugou's hand long and hard. He can't just stall time like this, but he knew his blonde friend wouldn't like his choice. The freckled boy gently pushed Bakugou's hand away as he forced himself to stand up. Bakugou's crimson gaze intensified towards him in both anger and confusion.

"Deku, what-"

"I'm sorry, Kacchan," Midoriya interrupted with an earnest yet sad expression. "I'm not risking it."

The greenette turned his heel to begin running towards the direction he remember the helicopter flew towards. Bakugou would throw an explosion in Deku's path if he could. Instead, he grit his teeth in anger as he watched his reckless childhood friend ran.

"Deku, you fucking idiot!!!" He screamed.

Still, the sight of Midoriya began growing smaller and smaller until he was no longer seen. Aizawa furrowed his brows in frustration and looked down. "Such a problem child...," he began. "Someone needs to go after him before he gets himself killed."

Dabi himself understood Midoriya's intentions, and deep down he knew he'd probably do the same thing. The blonde only spat and shoved his hands in his pockets before walking back towards All Might. The injured idol coughed and held his side and gave the most worried expression any father figure would.

"W-Wait...! We can't just let young Midoriya go off on his own like that...!"

"Why the hell should I care?!" Bakugou snapped. "He made his choice. If he gets hurt, it's on him." The blonde took All Might's other arm and gently hung it om his shoulders, helping him and Aizawa as they began walking.

Uraraka knew better, though. Through the explosive blonde's anger, she heard that hint of hurt and worry. The brunette knew she also couldn't go after him, knowing how badly wounded All Might and Aizawa were. She tightened her eyes and forced herself to look away from the direction that she may or may not see that mop of green hair again.

"Please... Be safe, Deku-kun...," She thought.

Midoriya continued to run until he knew they couldn't catch up and try to stop him. He stopped and put his hand on his knees, panting as he wiped the sweat from his brow. There was a sting from one of the cuts he received from fighting those men but he had to run passed it. When he caught his breath and started to run again, something else began to hurt. Something far worse than a sting. He screamed and knelt down, feeling for the source of the pain. That's when he noticed the patch of blood on his hand. He furrowed his brows and slowly lifted up his shirt to notice a bleeding bullet wound on his side.

"Ugh... I better find something to cover that so I don't bleed out...," he muttered to himself.

He hated to stall even more time, but he had to be cautious. He can't save his friend if he's dying from blood loss. He searched around and came across a trashed liquor store just around down the block. He figured it wouldn't hurt to look. Midoriya endured with the burning pain of the bullet wound and got his gun out as he walked towards that broken down door. He scanned around before entering, relieved there was no akuma or soldiers around. There was however a smell that was so diabolical it nearly made him fall backwards.

"Ugh... What is that...?"

He walked towards the source and found a door just behind the cash register. Hesitantly, he opened it and had to cover his mouth to try and refrain him from puking. Through the massive swarm of flies scattering out of the room, the sight of a female's body hanging by a noose was found and he quickly shut the door. He didn't even take a good enough look at the decomposing body to remember what the woman looked like and he didn't want to find out. He immediately found some gauze and medical tape, along with a key he had no idea where it was to. His curiosity peaked and took it as well, before rushing to get out of there.

The moment he did, he gasped for air as if he was just drowning. The breath of fresh air was such a nice welcome to his lungs. As he knelt down at a safe spot and opened the pack of gauze, sadness rushed into his heart. "That woman... She must've wanted to die as a human and not become one of those monsters...," He began thinking. "She must've been so scared. I hope... I hope she's at peace now..."

He finished covering the wound as best he could but he still winced as he tried to stand up. He began rushing towards the same direction and stumbled upon a certain item. A newspaper looked up at him as if it wanted Midoriya to pick it up. And so he did, and he found something incredibly helpful. It was an article about how Clearnox's center of operations location was to remain confidential but it was revealed to have been in Nagoya. Midoriya sighed heavily. He knew that was going to be one hell of a walk but at least he knew somewhat of the direction. He remembered traveling there with his mom once to see the Nagoya Castle. Back to when the world was peaceful. Was normal. His mom... He felt sad and decided to stop thinking about it. "She's somewhere safe," he told himself. "She's safe..."

Midoriya continued to walk until he came across a motorcycle. He began having wishful thinking. He rushed towards it and felt the leather seat and gripped the handle and only became astonished by the decent condition it's still in. Wait, he's never ridden a motorcycle or even driven one. Is he crazy? He must be, because even though his mind knew how insane this idea was, his body would not cooperate. His leg swung over the seat and he gripped the handle. He actually began grinning, before noticing there was no key in the ignition. His eyes lit up and pulled out the key he found in the liquor store, and put it in.

"A perfect fit...!" He gasped.

He turned it and the engine began turning on before stopping. He kept trying, and on the third time he twisted it, the motorcycle was running. He tested out the handles before a huge smile spread across his cheeks. Luck must've been on his side today.

"H-Holy crap, it works...? It works...!" He chuckled.

He took a deep breath and began driving it before stopping abruptly out of panic. "Oookayokayokay, deep breaths... You can do this...," He muttered to himself. He tried again and had to grip the handles tightly so he wouldn't fly off. After driving it for about a few minutes to test it, a surge of confidence flowed to through his veins. Midoriya looked ahead with determination and gripped it.

"Just hold on, Todoroki-kun. I'm coming."

He kicked off the ground and began making his way to Nagoya.

Cold. Dark.

Those were the exact words Shouto would use to describe the setting he was in right now. His mismatched eyes slowly opened and he made a pained grunt as he slowly sat up. His head turned to look at his surroundings and noticed that it wasn't actually too dark in here, much to his relief. He was in a cage, though. That's when he noticed what he was wearing, too. A hospital gown? He reached up and felt something cold and heavy on his neck, too. What the hell is this? A collar? Panic began settling in but most importantly, he needed to find a way out. He began gripping the bars and using whatever strength he had to make them loose. Of course that wouldn't work. He's not that dumb. He did need more light though.

Shouto began reaching outside of the cage and began feeling around to see if there was anything useful. He only found a small rock but that was good enough. He looked at the small source of light and carefully aimed, before throwing the small rock onto it. It knocked what was revealed to be an incredibly small light bulb onto the ground. The bulb shattered upon impact and Shouto wanted to blast a giant iceberg into these damn bars.

"Fuck!" He growled.

That's when the lights suddenly flickered on. A man came in and Shouto immediately recognized who he was. He was the guy with a scar on his face that also happened to have been with Yuna when they rescued their teachers.

"I see you're awake now. Enjoy your sleep?" The man chuckled. Shouto glared daggers at him as a response. "Oh, no need for hostility, Todoroki Shouto. You can trust me."

"And why the hell should I believe you?" The mismatched haired boy snarled.

The man sighed. "Look, if I wanted you to die, I would've killed you while you were knocked out."

Shouto grunted in irritation. He had a point, but still, trusting this guy would be stupid. When there was a small moment of silence, the man began walking towards the cage, causing the boy to jolt back. That was when the man pulled out an apple and slid it inside the bars.

"You must be hungry. Here."

Shouto looked at it and raised his eyebrows in return. Was this guy serious? That was when the man chuckled. "Relax, sonny. It's not poisoned or anything. Here, look."

He took the apple back and took a bite, then smiled. "See?" He then put it back through the bars.

Shouto looked at the now bitten apple and shakily took it, not denying that yes, he was very hungry. The growling in his stomach couldn't be contained even if he tried. How long was he out? He took a bite and tried his hardest not to make a sound of satisfaction.

The man pulled up a chair in front of the cage and say in front of Shouto, watching him as the boy chowed down on the fruit. The boy looked at him with a confused and irritated expression.

"What?" He spoke out, not caring if his mouth was full.

"That scar...," The man spoke again. "How'd you get it?"

Shouto instantly became angry. "That's none of your damn business."

"Okay okay, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to-"

"I don't." Shouto began eating the apple more, now with fire in his eyes.

The man sighed. "Look, see this scar on my face?" He asked, pointing to the scar that was made down his cheek and passed his lips. "This was when Yuna got so angry with me when I first began that she split my face open. Apparently, I made a mistake so huge that it nearly caused her to lose the company." He began laughing at the memory. "I'm not gonna lie, I hate her guts, but she does make things interesting."

Shouto listened to him, knowing that deep down his story was bullshit but a part of him wanted to believe him. No no no, he can't be afford to be stupid right now.

"Interesting," the boy responded, clearly sarcastic as he set the now finished apple outside the cage.

The man sighed. "Hey, boy... I know you're not exactly comfortable where you are right now but if you try your best and behave, I can guarantee you'll be okay. I'll make sure that bitch doesn't touch you. You have to trust me, okay?"

Shouto wanted to roast him alive... But even if he still had his quirk, there's no way he could try anything without getting shot to death.

What should he do?

• Refuse his help?

• Or trust him for now?

#answer in the comments!#boku no hero academia #my hero academia #tomorrow never comes #bnha apocalypse au #midoriya izuku #bakugou katsuki #uraraka ochako #all might #aizawa shouta #dabi bnha #todoroki shouto #bnha #mha #tnc #my au

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writingonesdreams · 5 years

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Novel Prep tag Game 3 - New wip: Flickers in the dust

So a new wip, another Novel prep tag game. These questions are just perfect for testing and developing ideas so here we go.

Rules: Answer the questions and then tag as many writers as there are questions answered (or as many as you can) to spread the positivity! Even if these questions are not explicitly brought up in the novel, they are still good to keep in mind when writing.

1. Describe your novel in 1-2 sentences (elevator pitch)

The question: How can a bunch of people with "useless" skills survive an post-apocalyptic world?

Impassive procastrinator Alysa travels with her self-destructive childhood friend Kyle, and the energetic 8 yeal old neighbour Iris, with the delinquent but vigorous boxer Roman and his werewolf friend Wes through the desolated world left after the apocalypse, trying to reach a better life in a bigger city.

2. How long do you plan for your novel to be? (Is it a novella, single book, book series, etc.)

A novel for now.

3. What is your novel’s aesthetic?

Dusty wastelands. Long field road. Vacant ghost towns and abandoned cars. Dust storms. Constant dark cloudy sky.

4. What other stories inspire your novel?

Megalo Box, Wolf’s rain, The promised Neverland, Ergo Proxy

5. Share 3+ images that give a feel for your novel

6. Who is your protagonist?

Alysa is a talented, thoughtful girl and former child prodigy, but she had trouble deciding what she wanted from life and started to fail her university exams. Her lack of self-discipline, motivation or healthy socilaization led her to believe she is quite unfit for the adult life or the world in general. After the apocalypse happenes she is forced to drastically change her priorities and negative thinking for the sake of survival.

7. Who is their closest ally?

Kyle is emotionally abused, burned-out genius with a self-destructive streak and fondness for dark humor. His will to live and emotional stability has steadily decreased over the years. Staying alive has been enough of a challange, so activelly fighting to survive seems like a pretty impossible feat to him.

8. Who is their enemy?

The desolated world after the apocalypse and it’s survival challanges, including insane mutated humans, ruthless gangs, isolated research centers, way too intelligent wolf packs and their struggle not to give up on their will to live.

9. What do they want more than anything?

The main characters want to be capable enough to survive and in addition to that live in a somehow meaningful way. To find out what's really important and what's the main difference between survival and living.

10. Why can’t they have it?

Alysa was pretty much a failing existence when it came to finding her place in the adult society and now she is supposed to survive in a world that's 100 times worse after the apocalypse. How can she do that when she had trouble surviving in the normal one?

Kyle struggled to find reasons to stay alive after his emotional abuse and depression. He has been saved by his friends and family from this, but now it's not just his survival at stake. Will a boy that had to be constantly saved from himself, be able to save someone else?

Roman was a boxer and convict before the apocalypse happened. His violent past marked him as unfit to decent people, but ironically made him exceptionally suitable for this destroyed world- he pretty much has better chances for a good life now then before. Does this make him a bad person? Does he deserve to win against the world or will he change to match it's cruel conditions?

11. What do they wrongly believe about themselves?

Alysa believes she is worthless and incapable as a person.

Kyle feels like he is living on borrowed time anyway and doesn't see any perspectives for himself.

Roman isn’t sure if his abilities to survive that are based on his violent past don’t make him a bad person.

12. Draw your protagonist! (Or share a description)

Alysa is tall and slender girl, has middle long wavy blond hair, light blue eyes and ivory skin. She has very delicate features and is rather pale.

Roman is muscular and tall with tanned olive skin, black curly hair and amber eyes. He is covered in scars, most notably on his chest, arms and neck.

Kyle is tall, lanky and not visibly muscular even though he is trained in martial arts. He has a bit longer black hair, with bangs falling in his eyes, very pale skin and grey eyes.

Wes in his human form has dirty blond curly hair and eyes that change from green-blue to black according to his mood. He has dusty grey fur in his wolf form.

Iris has short red hair and vibrant green eyes.

Plot Points

13. What is the internal conflict?

The characters struggle with their will to live in a destroyed world and with their feelings of worthlessness and inaptitude to fend for themselves or build happy lives.

14. What is the external conflict?

Surviving in the destroyed world, maturing and growing stronger, adapting to change and fighting for themsleves in a world that is aiming to make it as hard as possible for them.

15. What is the worst thing that could happen to your protagonist?

To die because they gave up on life instead of the world actually killing them. Losing to the harsh conditions of the world would be better then losing to themselves (albeit not much).

16. What secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story?

How do you not give up when everything seems hopeless? Who is the worse enemy in this destroyed world - the mutated monsters or the humans left? Where does the will to carry on come from? Is it possible to hold on to humanity in a world of ruin? And what is it that makes us human?

17. Do you know how it ends?

Nope. I’m happy I don’t, since it makes it seem like a very exciting story to work on!

18. What is the theme?

Self-worth, aptitude for life, will to live, not giving up, true companions, bonds, drive, meaning

19. What is a reoccurring symbol?

Dust, wind, dark sky, endless road, storms

20. Where is the story set? (Share a description!)

A destroyed post-apocalyptic Earth, where the majority of the population died and the rest flocks together in desperation into cities for protection from the zombie-like humans affected by the radiation and mutated over-intelligent wolves.

21. Do you have any images or scenes in your mind already?

Many scenes, dialogues, themes, flashes of setting and atmosphere.

22. What excited you about this story?

Something about the destroyed post-apocalyptic world fascinates me. It’s a plot around survival and hard conditions forcing the protagonists to face their inner demons and self-doubts if they want to survive and have the will and drive to fight, witch often makes the difference between life and death. Also the necessity for the characters to trust and rely on each other and their group dynamics development is very exciting.

23. Tell us about your usual writing method!

I always start with characters that I stick in different scenarios or in my favourite movies and series or books and let them interact. From those I mostly get inspiring scenes that I try to connect through a plot. Afterwards I work on characterisation, world-building, research details and outline stuff a bit. I also write little snippets that sometimes turn long and can be used as chapters.

I'm tagging a few peeps I haven't seen doing this game if you are interested: @piratequeenofpixies @imaghostwriter @tenacious-scripturient @writingwhithotchocolate @cabaretofwords @nemowritesstuff @emmathenovelist @bos-ingit @my-desk-is-full-of-used-pens @purpleshadows1989 @whiteblack-raindrops @surroundedbypearls & anyone who wants to!

Wip tag list: @tenacious-scripturient @hyba @urbanteeth (tell me if you want to get on/off)

#writeblr #tag game #novel prep tag game #creative writing #my writing #wip #my wip #wip: flickers in the dust #tag games

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lizzybeth1986 · 7 years

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Note: This is really a Drake-centric diamond scene. So I’m not sure I can peacefully club this under Liam’s diamond scenes per se, but since Liam and Hana’s dialogue dominates the flashback I felt it was important to add. I will list be listing this as a Drake scene in the masterlist. Since this is a Liam-centric set of essays, I'm afraid I will only be focussing on the flashback itself.

The flashback in Drake’s marshmallow-toasting diamond scene basically charts out the same plan that Liam gives the MC in the balcony, but in greater detail. We now know that:

1. The three LIs actually met and operated together rather than working in individual capacities based on their own plans.

2. Liam worked out that Olivia had left under duress too (his reaction when she talked to him already seemed to indicate this, plus he knows her personally, and knows that she would have never accepted defeat without a good reason). The question that now remains is whether anyone has contacted her, or aims to contact her, any time soon. I doubt it, considering that Liam aims to lie low for now. If Olivia is to make an appearance now, it would have to be (like the MC) on her own initiative.

3. All three of them refrained from contact for similar reasons. Liam and Drake did it to keep her safe and make sure they didn’t raise suspicions, and Hana herself was not allowed access to the outside world until Madeleine contacted her parents.

4. Liam knew that the MC would make her way back to the court. Not because he had any contact with the Beaumonts, but because he knew the Beaumonts and the MC well enough to consider her return a certainty. He knew Maxwell and Bertrand well enough to understand that they would trust her and train her, and he knew the MC well enough to know that she wouldn’t talk such an attack against her reputation lying down.

5. Most importantly, he knows this goes beyond just someone who wants to get rid of the MC.

I feel he uses treachery, a pretty loaded word, to describe a bigger picture. As mentioned in the Balcony essay, Liam has an intimate knowledge of how deep the rot within the royal court runs, but up until now has had difficulty getting to the bottom of it. He doesn’t know who he can trust - besides Drake, Hana and the Beaumonts - or who is involved. Or how much of the court is involved (I will elaborate on this later on in the essay).

My breakdown of the post-Coronation focusses on three aspects:

Initial Reactions to the MC’s Plight

In a fascinating role-reversal, the more mild-mannered love interests (Liam and Hana) vent out in anger, while the normally brusque Drake remains calm, and urges his friends to do the same. To understand their reactions, I think we need to take a look at the time gap between the MC’s ouster from the ballroom and Liam and Hana’s entry into her room. This might also help us understand why the LIs collectively chose her room particularly to regroup and discuss their next move.

As we all know, the MC was already dressed before she arrived at the palace, and possibly dropped her luggage in her room before greeting the King and Queen at the ballroom entrance. I doubt she would have unpacked much, given she didn’t seem to have much downtime before the ball began, so forcing her to repack and leave couldn’t have taken very long. Between walking to her room, hurriedly collecting her remaining things, changing into her normal clothing, checking for anything left behind, and being dragged to the car, I’d give it possibly 15 minutes maximum.

Drake tells us before he begins his narrative that he ran after the car that was taking the MC away and missed it by minutes, following which he found Liam and Hana already in her room. Which means, obviously, that any action that the three could afford to take happened after the MC was already gone, and not immediately. Remember that this court, right now, is still in a state of chaos.

If we assume it took the MC fifteen minutes to leave, then we’ll also need to assume that within those fifteen minutes Drake and Hana were being held back by the guards, and Liam forced himself to ensure that there was calm in the court first, complete whatever formalities were left and possibly accept congratulatory words from the guests at the ball. I would assume that the guards might have let go of Hana early, if she didn’t put up too much of a fight. Since the ball was coming to a close with the coronation/bride-announcement anyway, I would assume Liam left soon after. Given that they knew the MC’s things were in her room, there is a possibility both were trying to see if they could find her there (remember, Liam was insisting on talking to her to Regina). Drake took longer, since he was fighting with the guards to get to her, and then chased the car till it disappeared.

Hana

(My Coronation pics for all three have been downloaded from YouTube, sorry)

Hana appears distressed when the MC is dragged out, and is angry by the time Drake finds them. The book cites her as fighting alongside Drake to reach the MC, but since she couldn’t put up too much of a fight (evidenced by the fact that the guards let go of her earlier than they did Drake), I wouldn’t be surprised if she was as furious about her own state of helplessness as with the people involved in the scheme.

Hana’s background reveals a woman who has had to repress her emotions repeatedly for the sake of her family, has had to make their interests her own just to advance her position. We have plenty of evidence from her diamond scenes that she is someone who has been taught to muffle her feelings, her likes, her personality, in the hopes of finding a suitable match. She “doesn’t mind” the pain of a broken arm because it’s the one time her parents show affection. She would rather purposely fail at a piano performance - an activity she loves - than directly confront them about using her as a trophy. When Peter, her former fiance, confronts her about her feelings (or lack thereof), she maintains that she would have gone through with this loveless match anyway, because she felt she had no other option. Same, with her alliance with Prince Liam: it doesn't matter to her parents whether she loves him or not as long as he chooses her, and had she not fallen for the MC she would have gone along with this plan. In fact, until the MC came along, Hana tells us she never really felt alive.

The only other time we see Hana losing her temper is when the MC encourages her to fight back at Applewood. Given how repressed she is emotionally, and how helpless she feels, I wouldn’t be surprised that she chose this moment - with friends she trusts - to break into an outburst.

Drake

In contrast to Liam and Hana, Drake seems calmer and more interested in figuring out their next move. I would argue that this is a result of having expanded enough emotional energy, in fighting the guards and in the subsequent chase, to now mind his every move and remind his friends of what is at stake. During the finale, Drake seems to be the only one who seems to react to the MC’s plight with anger, rather than shock, or helplessness (remember, at that point, we’re not sure why Liam is angry when he announces Madeleine’s name). However this sequence shows us that all three were equally furious at how things went down - only that Drake was able to express his anger as it happened. Having had his space to vent emotionally during the chase, he is able to move forward and think with a clearer head.

Drake, as a commoner, is considered an outsider to the court and does not feel the need fit in. His emotional growth with regards to the MC has more to do with opening up to warmer, happier experiences. Anger and frustration are easier emotions for him to deal with, so I would imagine he doesn’t repress that as much as Liam and Hana do.

Drake’s state of calm in front of Liam and Hana is possible only because he has already spent his emotional energy on trying to reach the MC before her car drove away. However, in the light of the situation, his calm, practical approach is exactly what Liam and Hana need.

Liam

Of the three, Liam’s reaction seems the most confusing during the Finale, and the most extreme in this scene. His immediate reaction to the scandal (or rather, to the impending threat on the MC’s life) ranges from sadness, to shock, to frustration, but he never gives an indication as to what drives him to this decision. He is angry, yes, but his anger is controlled and simmering beneath the surface, evident only by his fisted hands when Madeleine kisses him.

His outburst in the MC’s room couldn’t be more different. He protests against it, he curses, he slams his hand against a table, not caring that he has possibly injured himself in the process. It takes Drake’s reminder that he is being watched - and the implication that his present behaviour could blow his cover - to get Liam to calm down.

Like Hana, Liam has been taught to repress his emotions. However, this is something he cannot shake off as Hana possibly can in the future, but a very important component to how he operates as a monarch. He has been trained from childhood to never show his emotions in public, to never make other people aware of how he is feeling. This quote from Regina (in RoE Book 2) gives us a good idea of the kind of upbringing that’s made Liam this way.

Think of this. This is only his first night as King of Cordonia, and already the court has been plunged into chaos, his intended bride dragged away right in front of him, and Cordonian law hanging over his head. The country is practically looking to him to prove himself a fit ruler for their country, the memory of his brother’s abdication still fresh in their minds. He has mere minutes to make a decision. He not only has to grapple with choosing another woman so soon after admitting his love to the MC, but also is aware that his every move is being watched and one step in the wrong direction could give his motives away and harm her. Not only does he feel anger at the injustice of it all, and anger at himself for contributing to her humiliation, he also has to instantly show outward calm and appear as though the MC doesn’t matter to him. Unlike Drake and Hana, Liam doesn't even get the opportunity to process this overload of information properly.

By the time he reaches the MC's room, Liam's stoicism and sense of restraint are in shreds.

Liam the Person vs. Liam the King

So far, the MC has only seen the personal aspects of Liam’s life - his family, his childhood, the stories he grew up hearing. Most of their scenes together show us a man who is eager to please his beloved, ready to move out of his comfort zone to make her happy. In his personal life Liam is a man who frequently asks consent for everything (eg. he asks Hana if she wants to return to court, and hopes he isn’t “being presumptuous” by considering her his friend), does not like to assume anything on behalf of other people, does not like to impose his needs even on those he considers his friends. Even the moments where he exerts authority are behind-the-scenes and hardly viewed by the MC (eg. the decision to make Drake an informal bodyguard). Most of his normal speech is in the form of questions, leading statements made so that the MC can choose her response, suggestions and polite requests.

In contrast, as soon as he has recovered from his outburst, he explains the risks to Hana, and answers her doubts regarding his actions at the Coronation.

Following this, his language is direct, practical, marked with instructions - only retreating to his normal-person speech to get her consent on returning to court and establishing their friendship. With Drake, his best friend since childhood, he doesn’t even need to do this, since he knows both of them are on the same page and have already established a comfort level in their roles as King and Right-Hand Man. As a politician he exudes confidence (in getting Hana back to court, in in the fact that the Beaumonts will ensure the MC’s safety, in the roles he has enlisted Hana and Drake to play), reveals a calm demeanor, establishes his authority, gives directions and literally spearheads this mission to unearth the truth.

Contrast his speech with the MC (“would it be presumptuous of me to guess that you’ve had similar thoughts?”, “were the roses okay [for the date]?”, “you’re full of surprises, aren’t you? ”) to his demeanor here (“I am the King of Cordonia”, “So it’s settled”, “Drake, I know I can count on you to help the MC”). Once he enters into his role as king, he adjusts his demeanor and personality to do what kings do best - lead.

Applewood

There is no direct connection between this sequence and the Applewood scene with the maid at the end, but the fact that the book leads us to Applewood so early on in the story leads me to believe this is a red herring. The Beaumonts go there to find a lead on the investigation, and seem to have found it successfully in the maid who, no matter how your MC treat her, reveals to her that she was involved. Chapter 2 ends on this cliffhanger for a reason.

As readers of both TRR and RoE, we are aware of the dangers of the court and how deep their intrigues go. The MC isn’t, not entirely. So it makes sense to have her believe that she will finally discover who the culprit is…only for it to be revealed that things won’t be that easy. There are more chances that the lead the maid will give will be weak at best, forcing the Beaumonts to return to court armed with new hints, and an understanding that the conspiracy goes deeper, much deeper. The MC is one victim among many to the manipulations of the royal court, and to the traitors who make it so hard to maintain peace.

Liam hints at this when he uses the word “treachery” to describe what could be going on in the court, and in doing so reveals that the attack on the MC and her reputation could be part of a bigger, murkier picture.

–

#the royal romance #trr book 2 #diamond scenes #technically a drake scene #flashback to coronation #liam: diamond scenes #miscellaneous #essay #trr hana #trr liam #king liam #king liam the sexy #trr drake #trr beaumont brothers #liam x mc

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psi-psina · 7 years

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Hi. :) You don't know be but I've been following you for a little while now and since I saw your posts talking about Graves Disease I wanted to ask you about it. I'm a 19 yr old girl, and I was diagnosed with it a few months ago and started on PTU. I wanted to ask, what was your experience with doctors and medication like? You had to have your thyroid removed? I feel worried about how this is supposed to be managed long-term because my doctors can be quite dismissive. If you don't mind. :)

OH MY GOD

DEAR ANON PLEASE HEED THE FOLLOWING LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES

So this is my experience and for the LOVE OF GOD don’t let this happen to you.

I was diagnosed with graves disease at the age of 14, showing symptoms of fatigue, tremors in my hands, exophthalmos and a slight goitre. I was tested for sleep apnea before i was diagnosed. Once diagnosed, my mother took me to a naturopath rather than an endocrinologist (i was a child, i had no control over the situation PLEASE DON’T DO ANYTHING THIS STUPID) 😩. It didn’t go well. I was given a tincture of iodine and various herbs (including licorice :/), which i had to take for about 3 months. it did nothing for me and my symptoms steadily got worse until my mother had to take me back to the doctor. My blood work showed a significant worsening of my condition; my T3 & T4 were both far higher than they had been before.

I was put on Neo-Mercazole which I remained on periodically over the next 9 years. You cannot remain on thyroid suppressants indefinitely due to their nature and bastard side effects (expelling giant blood clots through your nose? horrific), which got gradually worse the longer I had to take them. I don’t know how your doctors are managing your PTU but be vigilant. You NEED to aim at getting in remission. I was monitored closely while taking NM over that first course, and then as my hormone levels returned to normal I was weened off it. I was okay for 2 years, and then relapsed when I was 17. I was put back on NM and monitored until my levels returned to “normal”, then I relapsed again when I was 20.

after this I remained on NM pretty much for the following 3 years, but it’s effectiveness started to wane and many of the diffuse symptoms (especially anxiety, palpitations, insomnia, tremors, goitre, exophthalmos etc) simply weren’t going away even when my blood work showed I was within a supposedly normal hormonal range, and I just slowly went downhill over those 3 years.

this is huge problem with regulating thyroid disorders like this, your hormones are measured only in your blood work but T3 and T4 are heavily protein-bound hormones, meaning it’s presence in your blood IS NOT always consistent with it’s presence in your other tissues, where it is able to accumulate (not indefinitely without detection, but enough to give you symptoms). Suppressants just didn’t work for me long-term. They couldn’t help my thyroid regulate my metabolism over an extended period of time, the thyroxine in my body just kept accumulating. Basically, the moment I relapsed when I was 17, I was fucked. I was not aware of this at the time, obviously. At the time I had absolutely no idea what was going on.

the events at the end of my Final Relapse that led up to my surgery were serendipitous and bizarre. I was travelling to Japan in the October (2013) for a few weeks (which i flat out should not have been doing lmao) and got an appointment with my doc because i needed to fill another script for NM before I left, because i was about to run out. So i went and got the script and then when I went to fill it at the pharmacy, I couldn’t get the NM. There was an international shortage of Neo-Mercazole and I was flying out of the country the literal next day and I couldn’t get any ANYWHERE. PTU was still available but I couldn’t get that with a script for NM either. So I had no medication for most of those three weeks.

When I got home I booked another appointment as soon as I could get one and went back to work. Got another blood test to see what was going on and finally got some PTU. A couple of days later I came down with a cold. My immune system was shot and I was struggling to do things like get out of bed and walk up stairs at this point so I called in sick to work on the monday because felt so ill, and made another doc appt for that afternoon because i needed a medical certificate.

I went in to the doctor expecting to walk out with a med certificate, and asked her about my bloodwork. She opened the bloodwork and looked at it, looked at me, then took my temperature and pulse and immediately called my endocrinologist. My T3 and T4 levels were so high they were not measurable, i was feverish and hazy and my resting heart rate was 160-170 bpm. She told me I needed to go straight to emergency because I was at risk of thyroid storm (at which point I just burst into tears lol) and she called ahead to the hospital to have me admitted immediately, and that was that. I was taken to the hospital and was monitored there for 4 days and given several medications to try to flush some of the excess thyroxine from my body to make it safe enough for them to cut my thyroid out, which happened four weeks later.

So aside from the more diffuse symptoms of anxiety, depression, insomnia, full body tremors, exhaustion, goitre and exophthalmos, I was admitted in emergency with acute symptoms like fever, tachycardia, chest pain, hypertension, muscle weakness, bloody diarrhea, peripheral edema and fuck knows what else. :/ None of these things really abated over the weeks leading up to the surgery, and I honestly can’t describe what it was like to wake up from it almost asymptomatic after dealing with these things for months and years. It was like waking up in a completely different body.

If you’re wondering how I could have let things get that bad, how i didn’t realise just how serious it was, you need to understand. You need to understand how gradually all of this happens, it built up over a period of years, and when you live with a chronic illness for that long you literally just get used to feeling like shit, so if something else shitty starts happening you’re already so tired it hardly even registers. It doesn’t strike you as particularly abnormal because it all becomes normal. That’s the most dangerous thing about it. Not to mention, the sicker you get with Graves, the less capable you are of assessing your own situation; the anxiety and exhaustion and insomnia and horrible hazy brain fog you’re in every single day make it completely impossible to think clearly.

SO THE MORAL OF THIS IS, for the love of God, be careful, and take it seriously. It is extremely serious. I did not take it seriously enough for years because I was young, active and otherwise healthy which gave me a threshold for tolerating it that was far too high. Don’t dismiss your symptoms, don’t let your doctors dismiss your symptoms, ESPECIALLY the mental symptoms. Be aware of all possible and potential symptoms so you can actually recognise them for what they are, along with all the potential side effects of PTU.

Get blood work done EVERY THREE MONTHS. THREE MONTHS, not six, not twelve, every three months. Other thyroid disorders, you might be able to be a bit more chill about, graves you fucking cannot. You cannot.

Read and get as much information about this as you can. Heed how your diet is going to effect this, because like any endocrine disorder, it will.

Elaine Moore is useful. (Read the forums) This is useful. Reading patient forums about people’s experience with it and how they manage it is invaluable, it’s far better than reading blogs that are usually dogmatic and trying to sell you stuff. patient.info is also a good resource for information.

Make sure you have a good GP and ESPECIALLY a good endocrinologist who works WITH you. Most endo’s DO NOT specialise in thyroid disorders, most of them specialise in diabetes and only have a middling knowledge of thyroid issues. It’s absolutely crucial to find an endo who specialises in thyroid disorders. Find one, if you can. Otherwise just crowd source the information yourself, print it and take it to your doctors yourself. Because honestly, the cost of not doing that is just....not worth it.

This isn’t supposed to scare you or anything, it’s a god damn burden but there are plenty of people with Graves who achieve remission or find ways to manage it over long periods of time, it’s a highly individual disease. So I really hope you are able to do that. :) TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

#Anonymous

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