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goldenmarii · 4 years

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The darkest place... (FF)

“Everyone thinks I’m fine when in reality I’m not…”

TW: Anxiety, Depression, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide attempt, slight Anorexia

Word Count: 10.800

~~~~ proceed with caution ~~~~

~~1.

Kim Namjoon, Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook, the members of BTS are currently on tour, or rather they are performing their last concert in Seoul at the moment. Everyone is perfect at the moment, enjoying the last few minutes on stage, the adrenaline running through their veins. The last few tones are echoing trough the stadium, soon only their deep breaths are heard. The audience is cheering, it is a moment of pure bliss. Eventually, all speeches are spoken, the last bit of euphoria still in their system as they leave the stage. Back in the backstage room, the exhaustion hits them like a train. Sleep is now the only thing on their minds. They quickly go through the feedback of the tour and get dressed in their normal street clothes.

When they finally arrive at the dorm the members take their turns in the bathroom. Starting with the oldest Jin and finishing with the youngest Jungkook. Once everyone is finished they meet in the living room. There’s much to share about the tour, things they hadn’t had the chance to really talk about during their travels and busy schedule.

“So what do you think? Will this stay in Armys memories?” Namjoon starts the conversation. Everyone just thinks for a moment before answering.

“I think so, everything worked out as planned and we had a good time!” Jimin starts, everyone just nods their head.

“Yes, and we had a lot of fun so I really think that that made Army have fun, too!” is added by Jungkook. Once again everyone nods. All agree that this tour was a success. Now thinking about all the joyful moments a smile spreads over their faces.

“Have you seen how everyone cheered when we poured the water over Yoongi Hyung!” Jimin can no longer contain his laughter. Soon the members join in, all except Yoongi who sits there pouting.

“Hey, that wasn’t funny! My hair was drenched for the rest of the performance!” seeing everyone around him still smiling widely he can do nothing but laugh as well though.

“Fine, maybe it was a little bit funny…” saying that laughter can once again be heard in the dorms.

“Oh, and when Jimin Hyung tried to make jumping hearts but ended up falling and rolling over!” pipes Taehyung now in. The laughter that just died down a bit starts over again, echoing from all walls. The living room is full of laughter and seemingly happy faces.

“I thought it was much more fun when the rose Jin Hyung threw landed right in Namjoon Hyungs hair!” Jungkook adds another moment. Soon everyone can no longer stop giggling. The members share some more moments and bits and pieces of their overall tour experience. Bathing in the joy of the moment. Completely forgetting the time, their exhaustion and sleepiness. They being together now is all that counts. They are a family after all and share all their thoughts.

“Can we wrap this up now? I really wanna sleep” Yoongi yawns to underline his point. After everyone is finished giggling about his sleepy attitude they head to their rooms for real. Falling into their beds exhausted and feeling fulfilled and accomplished, nothing could take away their peace at this moment. The members already look forward to the next tour and the upcoming comeback. No matter how draining the job they had was, hey wouldn’t swap what they had for anything in this world.

~~Paralized

When did I become so cold?

When did I become ashamed?

Where's the person that I know?

They must have left

With all my faith

I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know why I’m here with these six talented people. I’m the odd one out, I always was.

Now I’m just here sitting in my empty dorm room. Yes, empty. There is nothing to show that this is, in fact, my room. Everything’s just dark and gloomy like my self. My mind slowly drowning me. I look at my hands, they’re shaking. We had a performance today, I messed up. I always do. The others are just to kind to admit. I’m lacking, I wasn’t in the beginning, I am now. Or it just didn’t show because they had no experience, but now that they do, I’m falling behind. Can I ever catch up? Will I ever be good enough?

Before my mind can go deeper, can become darker, I close my eyes. Try to sleep it all away. Even though I know this will never go away. Not as long as I’m here. A few tears run down my cheeks as my mind drifts of to a night of restless sleep.

~~2.

The next day the members awake late. Everyone’s still exhausted from the long tour and they use their week off to recharge. On their first day, they share a late breakfast and talk about what they’ll gonna do.

“So what are doing?” asks Hoseok while mixing his cornflakes. He looks into the group with a curious look in the eyes.

“Yoongi and I are planning to go fishing” beams Jin and claps in his hands, before throwing an imaginary fishing rod. Yoongi just hums and continues his breakfast without giving much attention. Even though he slept a solid ten hours he is still sleepy. Wanting nothing more than to head back to bed for an after-breakfast nap.

“I’m going to visit the new art gallery that opened last month, I heard it’s very popular.” Namjoon continues with his plans, showing his dimples and radiating happiness.

“Oh, oh, can I come?” Taehyung instantly asks, he always wanted to go with Namjoon when he went for another museum or art gallery, but couldn’t find a good opportunity until now that is.

“Sure, it’ll be fun.” another dimpled smile from Namjoon and everything is settled, they would visit the gallery together. The only ones missing for sharing their plans now would be Jimin, Jungkook and Hoseok.

“I’m going to visit my family in Busan.” Jimin missed his family, he wasn’t able to go see them since his last birthday, which is already almost a year ago.

“I’m going to Busan as well, we can travel together Hyung.” Jungkook ads to the conversation. Jimins smile drops instantly as he looks over to Jungkook.

“Hey! Stop copying me! I said I’m going to Busan first!” the other members snickering around about their small bickering. It would always be like that. Jimin doing something and if Jungkook decided to do the same the old fight would once again arise. They never really mean it seriously though. It’s like a fight between siblings.

“Anyway, what are you doing Hobi Hyung?” comes the question from Taehyung, Jimin and Jungkook still bickering in the background.

“Ehm I wanted to visit my family as well. It’s been a while since I was in Gwangju.” He hesitantly answers thinking Jimin and Jungkook would continue their bickering now with him, too. But no such thing happened. They all finished their food and started preparing their things for the activities planned. Jimin, Jungkook and Hoseok packing small suitcases for their trip, as well as Yoongi and Jin, who would travel to the yellow sea to go fishing. So the only ones left in the dorm were Taehyung and Namjoon who were already talking about the many art pieces they could see in the gallery. Everyone was stoked that they finally had some time off.

Jungkook and Jimin were the first to leave, they took Hoseok with them and brought him to the train station as he was going to go home by train. After that they took off towards Busan, finally coming to terms and travelling together. Why drive in two cars when they could just go together.

The next ones were Jin and Yoongi, even though Yoongi had to almost drag Jin out of the dorm because the older wouldn’t stop pestering Taehyung and Namjoon about not destroying everything in their home. When they finally left and Namjoon and Taehyung were alone they packed their stuff for the day and went off towards the art museum. Of course not forgetting their face masks. One can only imagine what would happen if someone recognized them.

The week went by faster than everyone wanted. But they had to go back to their work. The next comeback was only weeks away. So on their second to last day off Jungkook and Jimin made a detour to Gwangju to pick up Hoseok and then they drove back to Seoul with all three. Laughing and singing a lot during their drive home. Jin and Yoongi arrive on their last day before their normal schedule starts again. Both being positively surprised that nothing broke or burned down during their time away.

On their last evening, they once more sat together in the living room, not talking just enjoying the time together and watching movies. One by one they say their goodnights and head to bed. The next day would be fully packed with dance practice and last-minute recording, but they look forward to it nevertheless.

~~3.

They all wake up pretty early but don’t talk much, everyone still being tired. The whole drive to the dance studio they keep quiet, all members going after their own thoughts. Yoongi even falls asleep again in the car and the others have to wake him up. All in all a pretty lazy morning so far, which will change as soon as they arrive. As if someone clicked on a switch they take on their professional persona and start their dance routine. After a few hours, they take a break. Namjoon, Jin and Taehyung stay in the studio with Hoseok to go over the steps one more time as they still don’t quite get it, while Yoongi drags Jimin and Jungkook to the recording studio. They still have to record some part in a song that was changed only recently. The time flies by and before they know it’s already past six pm, they stayed the whole day in the studio without even really noticing. But before they can go back to the dorms Taehyung and Jin also have to still do some recordings, as the parts of the complete vocal line changed. While they still record the others, namely Namjoon, Hoseok, Jimin and Jungkook, already head home, so that they could prepare dinner.

An hour later Yoongi, Jin and Taehyung get home as well, they couldn’t exactly finish all recordings, but since there was still tomorrow they decided to call it a night. Exhausted from the constant repetition of the new dance steps, the voices of the two just couldn’t reach the standard they’ve set for themselves. So when they arrive at the dorm they are positively surprised to see dinner already being prepared and ready to eat. They sit down together and have some basic conversations about the day and the upcoming comeback show.

“So did you finish?” asks Hoseok the three that came later. Genuinely curious about the progress they made. But when he sees Yoongis grim face he lets it got. Better not start a fight that late in the evening when it would only mean going to bed with the knowledge of an ongoing argument. But Yoongi only sighs and answers anyway.

“We couldn’t finish, they couldn’t quite reach the notes correctly after the hard work they put into the new choreography. We’ll continue tomorrow but this time, before the dance practice.” Yoongi doesn’t seem to be too happy about it but he was definitely less upset about the still unfinished song work than usual.

The next day they continue as planned the night before. Finally finishing the last bits of the song changes. After the work in the recording studio is done they head to meet the other in the practice room. The other members are already working on the choreography, but instead of going through it from start to finish, they focused on perfecting the parts that weren’t fully right yet. Now that they were complete though they start going through the performance that would be held tomorrow at Mnet.

They repeat everything multiple times and most of the members already perfected it, but Namjoon and Jin still have difficulties. It would always be like this. The two would always be the last ones to master a new choreography, most times even in the last practise right before the performance, they would still make some mistakes. But at the performance itself, they would always get it right. It’s as if they needed the knowledge of disappointing Army if they made mistakes to really get it right. No ones bothered by it though, even if they did make mistakes, they were only human after all and making mistakes is the most human thing to do. So when they noticed it was already six pm again and they still didn’t get everything right, no one bothered to stay any longer. They needed their sleep to properly function the next day and they were never let down by their leader and the oldest anyway.

Before heading off to sleep though they all sit down on the sofas in the living room, talking about the plan for the next day. It’s just like always if there is a comeback. The maknae line is super hyped and can’t wait to finally perform, Jin and Namjoon try to calm them down so that they wouldn’t hurt themselves with their constant jumping around and Hoseok and Yoongi just sitting they observing what’s happening. One of them with a happy smile the other one with a tired expression. At this point, the current situation was just another routine they’ve gone through millions of times. So it was no surprise that everyone headed to bed only thirty minutes later, wishing each other a restful night as if there wasn’t just a whole circus-like performance laid down in front of them in the living room.

~~4.

To say the morning of the comeback show was hectic is an understatement. Everyone is running around collecting the last bits and pieces to take with them before they head out toward the Mnet studio. Upon arrival, they get ushered inside for their last practice, which would be the first one on the actual stage. Everything goes just as planned, Namjoon and Jin also manage to get the performance done without any mistakes. Just as always if they have to function, they do.

After the practice, they head backstage to get the styling done. They decided for a revamped version of their Fake Love outfits with the harnesses. This seemed to fit the new album aesthetic the best. So when everything is ready for the stage they wait. Since they aren’t the only ones performing tonight they still had some time to kill, two hours to be precise. They just chatted in the back room and made jokes about everything and anything.

“Hey, wanna hear a joke?” no matter what the other members could say now, they couldn’t stop Jin, he was already suppressing his laughter, before he even started to tell the joke. But to be fair no matter how stupid Jins jokes seemed they always enjoyed listening to them.

“Sure”

“What did the 0 say to the 8?” you could already see his grimace from keeping in his laugh, his face looked funnier than the joke would probably be, but no one cared at this point.

“What did it say?” asked Taehyung now, being one of the only ones that wasn’t already losing it because of Jins behaviour.

“Nice belt.” even before he finished he was already laughing his windshield wiper laugh and clinging to Namjoon. Everyone laughed as well or at least smiled, Jimin giggled so hard, he fell over and is now lying on the floor. They always had the most fun being backstage and just joking around, being completely themselves. So it came to no surprise that the remaining time went by faster than they expected. When it was finally time to enter the stage, they all had a huge smile plastered across their faces, ready to perform and dance and sing their hearts out. They always give everything for Army.

With the first beats of the song, they start their new choreography, everything goes well until Jimin falls over his own feet. He manages to catch himself though and dance on as if nothing happened, even though everyone seemed to be a little irritated afterwards the show is a success. No further accidents and in the end they all laugh about it behind the stage. Sure Jimin beats himself up a bit, but it’s nothing that didn’t happen before. They had way worse mistakes and bloopers on stage and this was still the first time performing that particular song.

“Why is it always me who stumbles on stage?” Jimin pouts while getting changed back into their street clothes to head to a restaurant after the show.

“Easy, because you’re our cutesy clumsy mochi!” Taehyung smiles his boxy smile, and with that Jimin just sighs and lets it go. Nothing to change about that now.

“Cheer up! I’m gonna tell another joke to raise the mood! What do you call an ice cream that parties too hard?” no one seems to acknowledge Jins joke so he continues “Eh? Eh? Wanna know?”

“Ugh just say it already” Yoongi exclaims finally, so that they could leave already.

“Out of CONEtrol” once again no one reacts until Jins starts his windshield wiper laugh.

“Ok, ok since this was no good let me explain why I do puns!” Jin tries again. The silence that follows doesn’t bother him.

“Because it’s my resPUNsibility!” this time they all lose it and start laughing uncontrollable. Still laughing they head for the car so that they could leave for the restaurant. Once they’ve arrived there they quickly enter and find their table in a secluded area. For the rest of the evening, they enjoy the food and each others company. Long forgotten is the slight bumpiness of their performance. At first, they also wanted to get some drinks, but since they have another performance the next day, where they would also answer some questions concerning the new album they decide to wait until the next day off.

It’s almost midnight when they arrive at their dorms, hunger stilled and tired from their long day. Without doing anything much other than the usual bathroom queue they head to bed, thoughts still filled with their first time performing their current albums song and already new hopes and expectations for the next show tomorrow.

~~Start to fall

Devils come out at night.

In the form of people that I love.

They said I’m not enough.

Well, factual this has become into something so understandable,

So understandable!

Help me out!

I did it again, I ruined everything. The constant repetition of the dance routine did nothing. I made so many mistakes. How can I call myself idol if I can’t even get the choreography right? My voice as well, it wavered a lot. I really start to believe what all the comments say about me. BTS would be better off without me. Maybe I should leave.

But knowing the others they won’t let me. They are too nice, too empathetic to accept what’s the truth. That I’m the weak link. The one dragging everyone down. I’m not even useful in any other way. All I do is weigh them down. I need to find a way out. I need to.

Despite keeping my portions small, I’m still not good enough. I let myself go. I’m out of shape. What would the agency say if they knew how much weight I gained? I was never one of the pretty ones in this group, but I could always get the points for my body. Well, that’s the past I guess. I better go on a diet, can’t let everyone down, more than I already do. Maybe I shouldn’t have eaten earlier in the restaurant.

Standing in front of the full-body mirror in the bathroom I look at my self. This isn’t pretty! I pinch my stomach. That’s not nice to look at in any way shape or form. I go back to my room. Better train off all the useless calories I consumed today, maybe that will help.

I start to fall back into the depth of my mind. I’m not good enough, never good enough. I’m not pretty enough, my dance skill is not on par with everyone else, my voice too weak, I can’t do anything right. Why am I still part of this? Why wasn’t I already kicked out?

~~5.

After they finally have everything ready, they head to the TV studio. They are late for the show since it was almost impossible to get Yoongi awake and Namjoon forgot his bag at the dorms. When they thought that they had everything and almost drove off they noticed that they forgot another essential. Taehyung was still at home and they were already two streets further. So after going back for the second time they were now twenty minutes late and probably wouldn’t get a chance to practice the choreography one last time before the show started.

Just as predicted they arrive and are instantly ushered to change their clothes and get their make up done. The show already started and they’re lucky that they wouldn’t have to enter the stage right from the beginning. With only a few minutes to spare they head towards the stage entry and wait for their signal.

After getting the ok they head up on stage and are greeted with many cheers and even some army bombs in the audience, even though this was a talk show, so not really a huge performance as on concerts or the Mnet Comeback Countdown. Nevertheless, they wave towards the audience and are grateful that they didn’t spoil anything for them by being late. Sitting down on the comfy sofa the host already starts to bombard them with questions.

“So you just showed the world one of your new songs yesterday, how do you feel about the album?” starting with an easy question Namjoon answers it without a second thought. They had talked about it many times during production.

“We wanted to create something new, while still keeping many aspects of our previous albums. So you see we have our favourite elements of all the albums released up till now.”

“We have outfits like Fake Love and Blood Sweat and Tears” Jimin beams.

“Yes, yes, I can see. Coming to the songs specific now: What is everyone’s favourite from the new album?” the host continues. They all take their turn answering. After that, there are a few more questions before it’s time for them to perform.

“So I heard your gonna perform for us today!” he cheers and waits for them to confirm and get ready to show their choreography and the new song. If possible the members are even more nervous than the day before as they couldn’t practise before the show. The stage is new to them and truth be told they managed to mess it up on a stage that they were familiar with. When the first beats can be heard all tension and worries are washed away though. They dance like they never danced before, feeling every sound and filling every syllable with all they got.

When the music stops, they stand still for a second or two, everything drowns in silence before the audience breaks out in applause. They managed to not only get everything right but also touch the listeners. They all feel accomplished and once again take a seat on the sofa.

“That was amazing boys!” the host congratulates “If every song on your album is like that I can’t wait till it arrives! Remind me, when will it launch?”

“The album sales start in two days, but the first music video is already posted on our YouTube channel” they all smile and wave goodbye after the second part of their interview.

Backstage they change and fool around, having just delivered a really good performance lifts up the spirits of everyone in the room. No pouting today, which does not mean that Jin won’t tell a few of his dad jokes. He wouldn’t be him without them.

They still have half of the day left when they exit the studio, so they decide they’ll gonna make a game afternoon at their dorms. It has been quite a while since they all sat together and played some board games, just for themselves and no cameras around. They quickly agree on the plan and also get some snacks on their way home. Every good game afternoon contains some snacks.

Choosing which games to play was harder though than just agreeing on playing board games in the first place. While the maknae line wants to play Monopoly Hoseok and Jin want to play Uno and Yoongi and Namjoon don’t really care. In the end, they decide to play a few rounds of Uno before spending the rest of the night with Monopoly, as this could take some while. Especially with the constant bickering and joke intermissions, who had to pay whom and why it wasn’t fair that Yoongi always got Mayfair and Park Lane. Let alone Taehyung being the first to shout that he gets to play with the mini Yeontan.

The evening was spent laughing and bickering, just like any family game night. Eventually, they sat all together cuddled on the sofa in the living room, snoring soundly while the TV was still showing the movie they started to watch but never finished.

~~6.

They are still lying spread out on the sofa and now also the floor when they are woken up by one of their phones ringing. Hoseok is the first to react, but he can’t get up because Taehyung clings onto him as if his dear life depends on it. So he opts for waking up the closest person lying to him, which happens to be Yoongi. Accomplishing his mission in getting someone to wake up, that someone being Yoongi, the phone is finally answered. Not all that politely but answered nonetheless. It turns out that it was their manager telling them they should get ready, they would be leaving in four hours to drive to the airport for their flight to Osaka, where they would shoot a few new episodes for Run! BTS. Being confused by the sudden flight Yoongi wakes up the rest of the member, asking them if one of them knew they would be flying today. Judging by Namjoons reaction he knew and forgot to tell them. Well, he forgot himself as well, so now they all had to pack up their stuff in less than four hours.

Never before had they to do this as far as on this day, so without any further time wasted everyone gets up and head to their different rooms to start packing.

After two hours there are still things not packed up and ready, but they decide to take a break and eat breakfast anyway, no use in running wildly around on an empty stomach. After that, they continue searching for their stuff and throwing their belongings into the suitcases.

An hour later the first few are done packing and either helping the others or just sitting around, reading or playing games. The time slowly runs out, but there is also not much left to do. Let’s just hope everyone finishes on time or that whoever is watching over them decided to tell them a wrong time so that they were definitely all finished up and ready to leave by the time the car would arrive to take them to the airport.

~~Can you hold me

Feel like it's just me, like it's just me

What it gon' take?

What it gon' be?

I don't even know, I don't even know

But I'm lonely, lonely

Feel like I don't even know me

Feels like I don't even know me

I don't even know me

The second performance of the new song was better than the first one. At least that’s what I like to think. I can’t seem to overlook the mistakes I made, even though no one judges me for them. Well, no one openly judges me for them. I never know what’s in their heads. Maybe they already plan on swapping me out. I feel so alone sitting on my bed, with most of the others still bustling around packing their last things for the upcoming flight to Osaka. I already have everything packed. But I also didn’t give much thought about it. There’s nothing that could help make me appear less ugly.

I stand up and head towards the bathroom. Once again standing in front of the full-body mirror. Once again lifting my shirt, poking my stomach. Ugly. Not enough. Where’s the old me. The one that at least had a slim and fit body. The one who didn’t hang behind.

I don’t want this me, the new me will never gonna catch up. I don’t know what changed or how I can turn it back. I know nothing. Not about my self, not about how I am supposed to keep up with the talented six males that are my members.

Before anyone finds me in the bathroom staring at my own reflection I go back to my room and throw my self on my bed. I hope they find a reason to kick me out soon, I can’t do this much longer. I just want to get this whole thing over with. They are better off without me anyway. I curl up into a small ball and as soon as I close my eyes the tears are flowing down my cheeks. Begging and praying to a god, who doesn’t exist, to change me up, or at least take the constant feeling of not being good enough away. And if the deities can’t do that, I just hope that at least my eyes won’t get all puffy and red.

~~7.

They finish up packing just in time. With the last one of the members dragging their suitcase into the living room the doorbell rings. They all get up and head to the door, checking one last time that everything is turned off and that nobody forgot anything. The car brings them directly to Incheon Airport, from where they’ll fly towards Osaka, Japan.

The flight is uneventful as most of the members sleep the whole two hours or just watch some movie. Once they arrive in Osaka they are instantly ushered in the cars to head to the hotel. They would’ve some time for sightseeing later in the day, for now, they are asked to head to there rooms. Unlike during the tour they would be sharing rooms so they had to make a plan who would room with who. They would be divided into three double bedrooms and one single bedroom. After arguing about who should be allowed to have the single bedroom they simply opt for rock paper scissors.

“Ha! Bye! I’m gonna go lay in my beautiful single bedroom and take a nap!” Yoongi is the one to get the most wanted room so the others are left to build pairs for the rooms. This time deciding against the game that caused them to lose in the fight for the desired sleeping place. Without further ado, they take some pages out of a notebook and write numbers on it, then picking each a piece of paper to see who will get the same number. Jimin will share a room with Taehyung, Jin with Jungkook and lastly Hoseok and Namjoon.

Once everyone is finished with unpacking they head out for some sightseeing. Not having this opportunity often when they travel for work, they all want to have some fun while in Japan. To not get too much attention though they decide to split up and meet again at a small café not far from the hotel in a few hours. Since they’re tired of deciding new pairs they just stay in the same groups as the rooms, with Yoongi tagging along Hoseok and Namjoon.

They do some shopping as well as visiting some of Osaka’s main sightseeing spots, as the Osaka Castle and Dotonbori. While wandering through the city they take many pictures and even get recognized a few times. Luckily they are mostly left alone so that they can enjoy their time being just ordinary tourists. In the evening they all meet up and talk about what they visited during their day. They all decided to just get some takeout and sit together in Jins and Jungkooks room to talk and make guesses about the next episode, as they were left in the dark as well.

“What do you think Jin Hyung, are we going to Universal Studios?” Jungkook asks excitingly, he really wants to head there and go on as many rollercoasters as possible.

“I don’t think so Kookie, why would we specifically fly to Osaka to go into an amusement park, when there’s plenty at home?” Hoseok pipes in before Jin can even open his mouth.

“Maybe we will visit Osaka Castle! Tae and I saw it earlier today but didn’t have the chance to go there.” Jimins bright eye smile appears instantly on his face. “They could make us answer questions to its history, or we could make another treasure hunt!” The ideas of the members get more and more confusing as they are speculating what’s about to come. From the rather possible ideas of a treasure hunt from Jimin to riding a boat on Yodo River. Yoongi even mentioned that they could just go to one of the old temples in the area or the library and would be doing something about the Japanese language.

The later it gets the obscurer are the topics of the conversations. At one point they were talking about the possibility to get kidnapped by aliens or rather what would happen if the aliens swapped one of them out without the rest of them noticing. Before the topic can be discussed any further though Jin kicks them out. Talking about how it was already past midnight and he needed his beauty sleep. It’s still up for question how much of that is really true and to what extend he just wanted to have an excuse to avoid having to listen to any more alien talk by Taehyung.

~~Save me

I want to breathe, I hate this night

I want to wake up, I hate this dream,

I’m trapped inside of myself and I’m dead

It’s the first night not sleeping in the comfort of my own bed. I already miss it. At least there I have common ground, something to keep me grounded. If the constant anxiety over my performances and the hate comments I receive can be called that. Most definitely not. Being in the spotlight 24/7 is drowning all my energy. How could I survive all this for the past years? I can’t understand. I don’t understand anything. I hate this, everything about this. This life, my body, my endless thoughts about not being good enough. If I at least had a reason for my constant worrying. But no, I entered this circle out of nowhere. I couldn’t concentrate any longer. My performance got worse and worse. My looks were never good, but without being able to concentrate on anything I got out of shape.

How much longer do I have to endure all this? When was the last time I slept a full night without nightmares? Without lying awake or crying myself to sleep? I can’t remember.

As I lie here awake in the foreign bed, in a foreign room, in a foreign country, knowing that I have to get up early in the morning, I’m trapped in this circle of thoughts. I can’t help but think about leaving not only this situation, this band, this family, but this world.

~~8.

The next morning they are woken up pretty early to get ready, they now also get to know what they will be doing for the Run! BTS episodes. Well, they are rather shown than told, when the car they’re in stops right in front of Atc Asobi Mare, a water- and indoor climbing park.

“So I was right!” is the first thing Jungkook screams when they enter the park “It is an amusement park!” Everyone just rolls their eyes about the happy attics of the youngest, but can’t deny that they enjoy seeing him be this happy.

“Yeah, you were right Kookie-ah” Namjoon adds laughing, showing off his dimples as they go further into the park. Everyone’s excited to see what was planned. Since they don’t really have to change clothes for now they head directly to the set and start filming.

The first thing they have to decide on are the teams. As usual, this is a hodgepodge so they once again end up drawing papers. The teams are Jimin, Hoseok and Namjoon for team one and Jin, Yoongi, Jungkook and Taehyung for the second one. When it came to the names of the teams it once again gets messy.

“Oh, let’s go with Team Tall!” Jimin shouts, everyone starts laughing, even the crew can’t hide their laughter about Jimins exclamation.

“But Jiminie that would mean you have to leave that team!” Jungkook laughs and almost rolling on the floor.

“Yah! Have some respect! I’m still your older!” they start their typical bantering.

“Oh, I’m sorry. You’re too small for Team Tall Shorty HYUNG” at this point no one can hold back their laughter when Jimin starts pouting even the last of the surrounding people is almost lying on the floor. To get back on track Taehyung starts talking.

“So when your Team Tall, we will be Team Daechwita!” happy with his decision he claps in his hands.

“Why though Taehyung? I mean Yoongi Hyung, Jin Hyung and Kookie-ah were all kinda part of it..” “KINDA?!” Yoongi interrupts Namjoon. “Yeah ok, they WERE part of it, but anyway.. what makes this a fitting name for you, too?” Namjoon corrects and finishes his sentence.

“Well, I’m the biggest fan, so it’s only natural!” Once again people start to giggle a bit, but not as much as earlier.

With the names decided they finish up the first filming and would now have some time to go through the park on their own. Getting familiar with all the different attractions before filming the actual games.

Jungkook dragged Hoseok and the rest of maknae line to go climbing on one of the many wall climbing attractions. While the youngest enjoyed climbing up and then letting themselves slowly fall down with the support belts Hoseok just stands at the bottom overthinking his decision to stand next to the hyperactive bunny when the producer announced they had some free time in the amusement park. Lesson learned, never ever stand next to Jungkook while being in an amusement park. It can and will get you to be dragged with him.

The rest of the hyung line just walks through the park looking at all the attractions and trying to figure out what they would be doing later. Their guesses are that they will have to do some games on the attractions as they notice some cameras already set up at a few of them. None of the members entered the water part of the park though so they weren’t sure if they would go there as well.

When the time is up they once again gather up in their teams and then head to the first attraction as a group.

~~9.

First, they walk to a huge swing set, you could already see the fear in Hoseoks eyes as the producer explains the rules.

“So one member of each team will be put on the swing, the others will push them to the air while you’ll have to answer questions about the other band members. There will be three rounds, so for Team Daechwita you have to decide on three of you to go on the swing, Team Tall you all have to go at least once” after finishing explaining everything the first members get ready to be swung around.

“Can I please switch teams?” Hoseok tries again while being put into the safety gear of the swing set, being in the team where everyone has to go at least once is definitely not his favourite choice.

The finish up quickly and after the first round, it seems that Team Daechwita is in the lead.

Both Hoseok and Jimin didn’t manage to answer more than two questions and as Team Daechwita has the adrenaline bunny on their side this game for sure was theirs to win. No matter how many questions Namjoon got right he couldn’t catch up to the other team.

Nevertheless, they got enough video material for the entire first episode just from this first game, so they change to making three parts instead of the planned two. For the second part, they need to get changed, so everyone files into the changing rooms to get dressed in their swimwear.

As soon as they enter the water area of the park they already see what’s about to come. In one of the huge swimming pools, there are some floaty islands. Once again the producer explains the rules.

“At the end of each parkour, there is a puzzle piece. You’ll have to get all seven puzzle pieces to be able to but the photo of the band together. The team that is done faster gets the win for the round. There will be five rounds with five photo puzzles. Each photo containing a hint, at the end the team that gets the mystery sentence correct will get three extra points. As you can see after this game there is still a chance for Team Tall to win! So get ready!” when the producer finishes his explanation they get ready at the start line. With everyone stumbling over the unstable floaty islands, there is some pretty good material for the second episode. Team Daechwita once again manages to finish most of the photos first.

“No fair! They have Kookie in their team!” Jimin whines, but in the end, they at least got the extra points for getting the mystery sentence, courtesy of Namjoons 148 IQ.

When all points are counted they still lose, even though it’s just by one point. Since they still have some time left they are allowed to stay in the park for a bit longer. Now that they have their swimwear on they decide to try all the different water slides, or rather the maknae line goes on the slides while the rest just stays in the pool relaxing. After his first mistake, Hoseok kept space between Jungkook and him so that he wouldn’t be dragged again. He already had more than enough action for one day.

As fun as the day in the amusement park is, everything good has to come to an end, so when it’s time to leave no one complains. Actually the youngest powered themselves completely out, leaving three almost fully asleep bandmembers and four that are trying to keep them at least awake until they get to the hotel. None of them is all to keen on having to carry them around. They had to do it many times in the past, but today they were too tired themselves to do so.

Back in the hotel, they all fall into their beds almost instantly. Dreaming about the next day when they would be having a barbeque at the riverside and would also exchange their manito presents the producer asked them to prepare and bring with them on this trip.

~~10.

The first one to be awake the next morning is Jimin who bounces happily on Taehyungs bed to get him to wake up. Today they would have a barbeque and exchange the presents and he really wants to see Yoongis face when he opens his present, as Jimin is his manito. As soon as Taehyung is awake as well they rush to the other rooms getting everyone to get up so that they could already start filming.

Finally at the riverside, they all take place around the fire that the crew prepared earlier, they eat delicious food and even get to drink some alcohol. The atmosphere is overall chilled and warm, perfect conditions for the end of this mini-series of episodes. After they are all stuffed with delicious food and slightly tipsy, not too much though, they prepare their presents.

“So who will start?” asks Jimin, all giddy to finally gift his present.

“We will go from oldest to youngest!” announces the producer “So whoever got Jin-ssi please give your present” Taehyung happily jumps up from the chair he was sitting on and runs over to the table where all the presents are laid out. He walks over to Jin and hands him the package. Jin slowly opens it and in it is a handheld mirror decorated with lots of little RJs.

“The both things you love most Jin Hyung” Taehyung added with a bright boxy smile on his face. Jin says his thanks and then its Jimins turn to get up and give Yoongi his present. All the way he is skipping and happily humming.

“I saw this and it reminded me a lot of you Hyung, so please appreciate my present!” he hands over a giftbag and when Yoongi pulls out a sleeping mask with the same cat on it that was on his doormat in front of the genius lab every one starts laughing.

They go one after the other and give out their presents, in the end, Hoseok got received new sneakers from Jungkook, Namjoon got a full bag of RJ merch from Jin, Hoseok gifted Jimin with a few jewellery pieces, Taehyung got a second set of bear figurines from Namjoon and last but not least Jungkook got a bunny plush dressed up in one of their stage outfits from Yoongi.

“Not fair Yoongi Hyung! You always gift your own merch but as soon as it comes to Kookie you actually get something nice!” Taehyung and Jimin pout at this.

“Yah, you ungrateful little..” “LANGUAGE!” Jin interrupts “ugh fine... I already told both of you I love you, what do you want more?” the conversation slowly gets back to easier topics and they have a lot of fun. Even after finishing up the filming, they stay a bit longer and just enjoy their time by the fire. When the sun starts to set they start packing up and heading back to the hotel. They had another TV show appearance the next day, and after that, they would head back home. On the one hand, they were all looking forward to getting back home but on the other hand, they wouldn’t mind staying just a tad bit longer to see more of the city. Especially Taehyung as he still hadn’t had the chance to visit Osaka Castle to take pictures. Maybe he had to come back here when they had their next vacation. Of course, taking at least one of the other members with him. If he gets the chance he would take them all. A family vacation in Osaka didn’t sound all too bad in his opinion.

Back in the hotel they quickly wash up and head to sleep, already packing most of their stuff back into the suitcases so they wouldn’t have to do so the next day.

~~11.

Starting their last day in Osaka with a huge fight wasn’t planned at all, but with so many people in one place, a fight was always right around the corner.

It all started when everyone was ready to leave for the TV studio except Yoongi, who was still fast asleep as no one dared to wake him up. The previous days, they were lucky that he always was already awake when they silently knocked on his door, but today this wasn’t the case. They discussed for long who would have to wake up the grumpy rock, with Taehyung losing the rock paper scissors, he now stands in front of his room. Knocking first, when no reaction whatsoever can be heard he takes out the spare keycard to enter the room. Just as they expected he was still curled up into his usual sleeping ball form, snoring softly. Without hesitation Taehyung accepted his death and pulled the covers from Yoongi, shaking him slightly and singing a happy song. Grumbling Yoongi slowly wakes up and the first thing he does is curse at Taehyung. After explaining the situation he is wide awake though and almost shouts at Taehyung again for not waking him up earlier, not listening to his explanation of the discussion happening earlier.

When they finally arrived at the TV studio, luckily only five minutes late, they immediately are rushed trough styling and makeup and send up on stage where they enter while already singing their newest song. The audience is booming and once again they catch some of the people there swinging army bombs. Happy with the resonance they start with introducing themselves. The host asks some questions about the comeback and also about the songs and album in general. The question don’t differ too much from the already answered ones in the Korean talk show, so they don’t have to think long before answering. Some of them are new though just as the question about who came up with the idea of revamping the older albums.

“We all did.” Namjoon starts “When we started discussing the new album and what we wanted it to look like we were all over the place at first but quickly made up our minds.”

“Yes, we had our seven years anniversary last year so there are many happy memories to look back on, we wanted to put all that into our new album, so we did” Yoongi adds onto it. They all nod and agree, reacting to the cheers from the crowd with aegyo and flying kisses. They really enjoy themselves being on the Japanese TV show.

The show goes by quickly and before they know they’re back in the hotel room just lying around in Jins and Jungkooks room, fooling around and making plans to come back for Osaka on their next vacation. Not only Taehynung wants to come back, but also Jungkook and Jimin. They have different reasons but the overall intentions are the same. While Taehyung wants to take photos of Osaka Castle, Jimin and Jungkook want to visit the Universal Studios. Once hearing about that Jin pipes in as well, wanting to see the studios, too.

After much talking, they decide to just order food and watch some movies, before packing the last bits and pieces back into their suitcases to be all ready to leave the next day. Even though they wouldn’t leave before noon, and would only be back in Korea in the evening they still want to be ready as soon as possible. The earlier they’re ready the higher is the chance that they could at least grand Taehyungs wishes to take some photos of Osaka Castle.

So when the clock shows ten pm they’re already done with packing and there is not much left to do, so they just head to bed. The next day would begin early in the morning with a trip to the castle before heading to the airport.

~~1-800-273-8255

All this other shit I'm talkin' 'bout they think they know it

I've been praying for somebody to save me, no one's heroic

And my life don't even matter, I know it, I know it

I know I'm hurting deep down but can't show it

It’s the last night in Osaka. My mind won’t stop spinning. I can’t, I just can’t. Thoughts keep drowning me. At this point, suicide seems like a valid solution. I never wanted to go this way, but my mind is the darkest place I can think of. There is no way of escaping. I just wanna end this. End it all. Finally, have my peace. The colour of my future is pure darkness anyway, why staying. I’ve got nothing left.

As so many times before, there are tears running down my face. I get up from the bed and try to be as quiet as possible as to not wake up the other person peacefully sleeping in their bed. I grab the notebook that I packed and head out of the room. My feet are carrying me towards the roof garden. There I sit on a bench, it’s cold but I’m numb to the limit where it doesn’t bother me anymore. I’m tired, just so endlessly tired of feeling numb, suffering and also living. I take the pen out of my notebook and start writing.

“I’m sorry, I never meant to leave you guys like this. I’m no longer human, death is the only way out that I can think of. I don’t want to disappoint you anymore than I do anyway. I just don’t deserve to be here, I don’t deserve to live. Suicide is not a defeat in this war I’m fighting, it’s my cure. My door to peace. The only way I can shut out these voices in my head, that are constantly drowning me. My mind became polluted by darkness, it’s the darkest place I know. I’m not gonna bother you ever again, you can live on your lives and just forget about me ever being part of you. I won’t be mad, it’s a relieve. I’m sorry again to ever even thought I could belong. Goodbye.”

As I finish writing I notice that half of the words I wrote are almost unreadable because of the stains my tears left on the paper. I can’t even write my last goodbyes without messing up. Realizing that I’m just a big mistake, a failure, I hug my knees to my chest and just listen to the cars driving at the bottom of this hotel building.

When I feel ready to go back inside the first birds already start to sing and the sky takes a brighter colour. I guess I’m not getting any sleep this night.

~~12.

As soon as the plane lands back in Korea everyone is relieved. They’ll have a day off before they start to work again on their choreographies and other content. There were still some songs to record for Taehyungs mixtape as well as a few other solo projects and Yoongi promised Taehyung to help him. Since their plane landed pretty late in the evening they won’t do anything for the rest of the day, just relax a bit after the stressful days in Osaka.

The next day they start their day off with a rather late breakfast and end up staying at home the whole day. Everyone on their own, reading, watching movies and series as well as playing games. The day ends too early for their liking but no can do. The things that have to be done tomorrow are at least a lot of fun, they are deciding on what they wanna do for their next Bon Voyage.

Just as planned Jin, Namjoon, Jungkook, Hobi, Jimin, Yoongi and Taehyung are leaving their dorms to sit down with the producers at a meeting in the Bighit building. Once everyone is seated the discussion starts.

“Let’s go somewhere cold again, New Zealand was pretty cool” Jimin takes the word.

“You got car sick multiple time on that trip, you sure you wanna reenact that?” Yoongi now pipes in. Everyone shares some looks before they continue as if nothing happened.

“So somewhere cold… how about Europe? We could go to Scandinavia!”

“But Tae we already were there remember? Our first-ever Bon Voyage was there!” Hoseok trows into the room.

“It’s even better then! I mean we already took so much inspiration from our old albums for the new one, why not do the same for Bon Voyage!” Jungkook happily shouts out, showing his famous bunny smile. Everyone agrees so they concentrate on the what to dos after that.

“So should we visit the same locations then and make a recap of the first season or should we visit different places?” Namjoon asks.

“Maybe we could do both? I really liked many of the places we saw back then and would love to see how they’ve changed, but also we could do some of the things that didn’t make it into the last one?” Jin now participates in the conversation as well.

The discussion continues and they plan many things, some old places that they wanna revisit as well as some newer ones and lots of hiking and camping. Jin and Yoongi even got their wish come true, they would go ice fishing during their time there. The time flies by and they have almost everything planned except the exact hotels and places to camp. They want to get a good mix of both, but without the camping bus as in New Zealand, since the roads are much too uneven there to force one of them to drive it again. Maybe for the Bon Voyage that comes after this one, meaning season six they can revisit that idea since many fans liked it.

Happy with the amount of planning they finished they head off to the studios. Yoongi who keeps his promise and helps Taehyung with his mixtape and Namjoon and Jin who follow Hoseok to the dance studio to get some more dance practice done. With everyone being busy Jimin and Jungkook decide to just leave for the gym and maybe have a Vlive there while training. It seems like a fun idea.

Slowly the day reaches an end and everyone is back at the dorm where they sit down together to talk about their individual successes of the day while enjoying their meal.

“So Suga Hyung helped me with my mixtape today” Taehyung beams while stuffing some ramen into his mouth.

“He was really cool while working, and we even finished recording a whole song!” He goes on about it and even lets the other members listen to it.

“Wow, that sounds awesome Taetae!” exclaims Jimin, loving the new song. “When will you be done with all of them? I wanna hear more!” He adds on and snatches some meat from Jins chopsticks.

“Yah! Get your own!” Jin is scolding Jimin but can’t be mad for long as Jimin gives him his infamous puppy eyes. They all laugh about the casual banter. Hoseok telling everyone how proud he is about Namjoons and Jins improvement. They managed to get all the steps down and now it’s all about perfecting them, but that shouldn’t take too long and can be done by themselves.

Now it’s Jungkooks and Jimins turn to talk about their time in the gym, they decided against the Vlive since there were too many other people around and they didn’t want to bother any strangers. All in all, everyone had fun that they decide to make a Vlive the following day, all together in their dorm. They think about doing it right that moment for a bit, but decide against it since it’s already quite late. So all they do for now is wishing everyone a good night on Twitter and Weverse, then head to bed themselves.

~~Already gone

Remember all the things we wanted

Now all our memories, they're haunted

We were always meant to say goodbye

Standing in front of my bathroom mirror, I look at myself. I look absolutely ugly, there are bags under my eyes, my eyes don’t laugh when I try to put on a smile. I can’t I just can’t do this any longer. They won’t need me for anything now anyway. I’ve done everything that was needed. My hand moves on its own, opening the cabinet and taking out the pills I’ve collected. Taking them all. It’s the middle of the night and I quietly leave the dorm. Nobody noticed, they are asleep and will wake up tomorrow, having one burden less. I wander around through the night until I reach the huge bridge going over the Han river. Wanting nothing more than to climb the edge of it and letting everything go. Just falling down into the deep river drowning myself like I’m drowning in my mind. I left the letter I wrote on my bed. Before I can reach the middle of the bridge and climb to my death, fate decides differently. Everything goes black, I guess the pills started to kick in. The last thing I can take in before everything is gone is a panicked shout. Yoongi. Did he follow me? What is he doing here? My thoughts once again spiral around themselves before every last bit of my consciousness is drowned out.

~~NEWS

Today we received word from BigHit Entertainment stating that all further concerts and shows of BTS are cancelled, due to Jung Hoseok, aka J-Hope, currently being in the hospital. They gave no further explanation, but fans all over the world are flooding Twitter and other social media with # WeLoveYouHobi. Speculations are that the Idol tried to kill himself but luckily got rescued by bandmember Min Yoongi, aka Suga. Hoseok is currently in hospital, more information is not provided. Get well soon!

~~Suicide

Suicide, baby, it's the worst

Think about the people that you'll hurt

They won't even care about the things I'll choose to do

Because all I am is all that I've been through

The next thing I can remember is a steady beeping sound. I slowly open my eyes and everything around me is white. I try to sit up but there’s a weight on me. I raise my head and see Jungkook sitting on a chair beneath the white bed I’m on, lying half on top of me asleep. I look further around me and see all the other members sitting on chairs or the ground in the room. The only one awake is Yoongi. He must’ve called an ambulance because the room I’m in is certainly not in the dorm but the hospital. He looks up as well and as he sees I’m awake a mixture of many emotions washes over his face. Anger, sadness, confusion and lastly relive. He gets up from the sofa he was sitting on and comes over. Slowly as if not to frighten me. Once he’s directly beneath the bed he falls to the ground, clinging to the bedsheets.

“Never ever do this again!” he sobs, “you scared the heck out of me, out of all of us!” I’m shocked, I never imagined that me leaving would have such an impact on them, I never saw Yoongi this upset, ever. I open my mouth to speak but before I can say anything he hugs me tight.

“Promise me, promise you’ll never do it again. I’m not letting go of you until you promise me, Hobi!” he’s still crying and it breaks my heart seeing him like that. I never wanted this. I never wanted to hurt them!

“I… I promise..” I’m choking on my words, “I’m so sorry Yoongi, so sorry.. please forgive me..” now I’m the one sobbing. By now the others woke up as well and one by one they all join the group hug.

“I.. I just thought I wasn’t... good enough... “ my sobs are getting harder.

“How can you think that? Your existence itself is a gift to us!”

“We all love, we’re not a family without you Hyung!”

“Yes, thank you, thank you for being in this world, don’t leave us!”

I guess I’m loved and needed after all.

“I’m thankful for you guys! So much, I won’t try to leave ever again… I promise..”

Butterflies can’t see their own wings, the rest of the world can.

#bts #bts ff #sad #angst #happyending #sadff #TW suicide attempt #self love #bts idol verse ff #bts idol #fanfiction #fictional

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thecostumeplot · 3 years

Text

Episode 9: Emma (1996) & Emma (2020)

Both

Welcome to The Costume Plot.

Jojo

I'm Jojo Siu.

Sarah

And I’m Sarah Timm. We're professional designers with a passion for costume design and the performing arts. Our podcast does contain spoilers. Accompanying slideshows for each movie are linked in the episode description.

Jojo

We hope you'll join us every other week as we delve into the wonderful world of costume design in The Costume Plot. [music]

Jojo

Okay.

Sarah

All right. Hello!

Jojo

Hello!

Both

Welcome back...

Jojo

...to The Costume Plot. I'm Jojo.

Sarah

I'm Sarah. It's good to have you here.

Jojo

We're so excited.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

Today we're going to do something a little different. We're going to actually compare two movies. There's a lot of remakes, actually, recently. In the movie world, there's a lot of old movies that are getting revamped and redone. So we decided to take one of these movies and take two different takes on it and kind of break down how they do costumes and how we feel they were successful. Or maybe not so successful.

Sarah

Yeah, and this is... so, we're both doing "Emma." I'm doing the 1996 Gwyneth Paltrow one. And Jojo is doing the recent one. And yeah... I love Jane Austen a lot. And I love watching any-- pretty much any version of Jane Austen adaptations, I'm on board. It's It's always a good time. And it's always gonna be pretty to look at.

Jojo

Mmhmm. I do love the Regency era... period.

Sarah

Me too.

Jojo

I think it's a really lovely period. And it's a really nice silhouette on guys and girls.

Sarah

Yeah, I agree. I agree. Okay, so I'll jump in. I'm going first. So yes, like I said, this movie is from 1996. It was directed by Douglas McGrath. And the costumes are by Ruth Meyers, who works a lot. She did "The Golden Compass" and "Ella Enchanted" and "The Addams Family." And she's been nominated for two Oscars, and one of them was for this. And then the other one was "Addams Family." She hasn't won any Oscars, but she's been nominated, which is always a big deal.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

I didn't realize that this movie had been nominated for Oscars, but like, it kind of makes sense. Like, a period drama is always gonna attract that attention, especially for the costume design Oscar.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

So our setting is, of course, England in the early 1800s. The novel was published in 1815. So that's about where people usually put it in time. And I couldn't find any interviews with Ruth Meyers about this movie, I think because it's old. So if there were any it'd probably be in a magazine and not online.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

But I did find one site that was like-- it was-- it's a blog, like a costuming blog. And they were comparing a bunch of different versions of "Emma." And I'm not going to say the name of the blog, 'cause it doesn't really matter. But they said that for this movie, the costume designer "abandoned historical accuracy..."

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

...which I thought was a hilarious thing to say. And also, I disagree. Because what she meant--what this person, the blogger, meant--was that like, a lot of the fashions are more like five years away from where they're supposed to be. And I'm like, "that's not exactly 'abandoning' accuracy." It's just kind of... fudging it a little.

Jojo

Because realistically, they wouldn't have worn whatever is right at the-- the climax of that era anyways?

Sarah

Right. She was picking out specific little things being like, "Well, this was from 1812, specifically, so it wouldn't..." and I'm like, "but that's still within 10 years!" Like, that's pretty darn good. It's not like they're all in mini dresses with their hair down. [both laugh] So that was... it was just like, that was kind of an extreme thing to say, I think. Because "abandoning historical accuracy" and picking something that's about five years away from where you set something; those are two different things.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

It's just very funny and nitpicky.

Jojo

Very different.

Sarah

So this is the Regency era of fashion, which is one of our favorites. We love it. It's very inspired by like, classical Greek styles. So the silhouette is very relaxed. It's like a column. We've really gone away from the big, crazy silhouettes of the late 1700s. So like, Marie Antoinette style: lots of surface decoration, and crazy colors, and huge wigs, and giant skirts; those things are of the past now, and we're in a more... I don't know, simpler, much simpler silhouette. And part of that is because of the French Revolution. And those big crazy fashions were associated with like, the French aristocracy and royalty. And no one wanted to be associated with that anymore. So it was like they had to swing in the completely opposite direction to get away from that period.

Jojo

I love the little history lesson we're getting.

Sarah

[laughs] Well, you know, it's for people who might, you know, hear "Regency" and be like, "What's that again?" You know.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

It's Austen times. That's a-- that's an easy way to remember.

Jojo

It's typically around the years of, I would say, 1810-18, maybe latest 1820. But probably be even a little bit before that.

Sarah

Yeah. Yeah. I think people say, like, 1805-ish.

Jojo

It's like 1816 or something like that.

Sarah

Yeah. Once again, we're not experts. [both laugh]

Jojo

And really, I mean, if you think about history of costume, everything kind of did overlap. Nothing ever just stopped right at a certain year.

Sarah

Right, exactly. So yeah, I don't think that this movie is inaccurate, in a glaring way. I think whatever liberties that Ruth has taken serve the story and help evoke the emotions. And the blogger called it an "impressionistic" view. And I think that that's kind of accurate. It's-- you know, you want to evoke the feeling instead of making it a carbon copy. And so this first picture I have is a good example of it. This is Miss Bates. And she's like, the spinster. That's what they call her. You know, she's an old maid.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

She's unmarried, ergo... she is dressed a lot older than our leads are. She's wearing a much darker color than all the other young ladies wear. And everything is a lot fussier-looking. And she has another look. Let's see... yes, this one is from much later in the movie, but she's wearing a mob camp, which I read is usually associated with married women. But I think probably if you're like-- if you've decided you're an "old maid..."

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

...you can probably wear a mob cap because you're like, signaling to everybody that you've given up? I don't know. [both laugh]

Jojo

It does look kind of Amelia Bedelia in the image that you've given us.

Sarah

Oh, poor Miss Bates. Yeah. And this color is like... it's just an oatmeal, kind of sad taupe and...

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

But I will say that this is this particular one, this beige one, is a good example of looking for historical accuracy in the character that the audience is supposed to see as mumsy or old.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Because she has a long sleeve on, and a lot of Regency dresses should have a long sleeve, and there are not a lot of long sleeves in this movie.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

And she has a higher neck, and a lot of Regency styles have a low neck, but I think for everyday, most women would probably choose a higher neck than we're seeing in this movie.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

I mean, it's communicating what it's supposed to communicate. Also, I felt really bad for her. I feel so bad for Miss Bates.

Jojo

[laughs] I do too. They definitely made her look like a super nerd in this movie.

Sarah

This actress is really good, though. I don't know her name. But like, there's that scene where they're all at the picnic and Emma makes fun of her. And she was so good in that scene. I feel like I should look up her name and shout her out. Hold on one sec. Just 'cause like she...

Jojo

Do a little IMDb on her. Yeah, it's funny because I did not look back at the old "Emma" when I watched the new one to prepare for this. But it is interesting seeing even just the comparison as you're going through. I'm like, "Oh yeah, that's what she looked like in the original movie."

Sarah

Okay, so this actress's name is Sophie Thompson. Great job Sophie.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Yeah, actually I wanted to watch yours too. But then I like... procrastinated and put it off, and I didn't feel like watching two "Emmas" yesterday. So...

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

I was like, "I'll just watch it later."

Jojo

I know, I was gonna say, I was like, "that would be a lot, to compare the two." But it's cool to be able to see the before and after, or the... the first and the latter? [both laugh] Whatever you wanna call it.

Sarah

The nineties and the now.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Alright, so let's move on to Emma herself, played by Gwyneth Paltrow, of course. I picked this pink look, for when she's doing archery, because I liked... it looks really billowy and tent-y in this shot, but it's just because it was windy, I think. She has this little... thingy holding up her skirt for archery?

Jojo

Oh, interesting.

Sarah

Which... I thought that was interesting and kind of fun. And you can see her shoes which is... also fun. [both laugh] She's wearing a little buttoned-up boot. And the color I think is... I don't know, like, a little bright. Here's another picture of it. I mean, it looks pretty washed out in this picture. It's like a pastel pink. I like the stripe on it a lot.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

She wears pretty much all pastels and whites in this movie, and it really gives her that youthful air. She also doesn't have a lot of surface decoration, trims, like... not a lot of sparkly stuff, not a lot of jewelry. And that gives her sort of the... she kind of doesn't have a care in the world, you know? She just kind of throws something on and goes about her day, because she's kind of frivolous and spoiled. But in a youthful, naive kind of way.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

So I think that the clothes fit. Also shout out to the hair in this movie. I think the hair is excellent. I have a couple pictures where it goes kind of 90s.

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

But like, this one, it's pretty dang good. She's got her center part. She's got her little curls coming down.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Pretty good! Lots of times, the place where you see the era that the movie was made is in the hair.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Which is always so fascinating to me. This is a cloak she wears. I liked this a lot. It's like, the party where she goes, and then Elton--Mr. Elton--like, assaults her in the carriage. [both laugh] Side note, as I was watching this movie I remembered I have already covered "Clueless," which IS "Emma."

Jojo

Yep. Yep.

Sarah

[laughs] It's so funny how "Clueless," it hits the exact same story beats. It's amazing.

Jojo

Mmhmm. Yep.

Sarah

I love that movie. Anyway. [laughs]

Jojo

Also isn't... I'm trying to... yeah, it is Alan Cumming for Mr. Elton in this movie! [laughs]

Sarah

Yeah, it's Alan Cumming. I love him. He's--

Jojo

I do too.

Sarah

Listen, anytime he's on screen, I'm like, "he's welcome."

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

I love to see him.

Jojo

I forgot he was Mr. Elton. I do love him as as Mr. Elton in this movie.

Sarah

Mmhmm. So this is one of the examples of the hair getting a little bit 90s. It looks kind of like a 90s prom updo.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

I think it's because there's no part and it's pulled a little tight.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

I think that Regency styles were a bit more relaxed than this.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

But I also pulled this because I like the cloak. But I'm also unsure of what this fabric is. Like, is it supposed to be fur or is it supposed to be high pile velvet?

Yeah, I was thinking about that-- or like, a velveteen or something?

Jojo

Yeah.

I don't-- it is a little strange. It's hard to tell.

Sarah

Yeah, it looks like a really plush blanket. Like, my mom is really into blankets like this right now.

Jojo

[laughs] Love it.

Sarah

So it looks exactly like those. [laughs]

Jojo

She just needed to be warm!

Sarah

Yeah, I mean, it's in the snow. So it makes sense. I like the big hood.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

That's fun. I liked it, you know, I didn't dislike it. It was just an interesting fabrication choice.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

And then here-- so, she wears so many clothes in this movie that I had to just kind of grab a handful and then just let the rest go. And I don't have a lot of specific stuff to say about...

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

...any of the individual looks after this. It's just kind of like, "Look at this! Look at that! Look at that!"

Jojo

[laughs] "It's pretty!"

Sarah

So this is one of her first looks, it's a nice white. She wears a lot of white. And then we have Harriet over here, who's very youthful, and even more naive than Emma.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

And then this is another one. Like a green-y brown-y plaid with a red wrap. Very pretty. This is a party look. I like this one a lot. It's like a sheer with... it's like a chiffon with a satiny stripe in it.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

And we're seeing once again, she's wearing jewelry but it's very simple jewelry. She's got her sort of 90s updo again. Don't have much to say. [both laugh] Then, I like this one. This is them in the carriage, and she has this little, like...

Jojo

Capelet?

Sarah

Capelet! Yes, that's the word. [both laugh]

Jojo

I was like, "is that what that is?"

Sarah

I was making a little motion, like...

Jojo

[laughs] I did love that.

Sarah

I like the fringe on this a lot, it's very pretty. I don't know.

Jojo

Oh, I thought that was just an eyelet lace. That's cool.

Sarah

It's like a lace with fringe hanging down, like a little...

Jojo

Oh yeah, that's super nice.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

For those of you looking at this on Instagram, please zoom in.

Sarah

Yeah, zoom in, zoom in. Also these are screenshots, and like, this is as HD as this movie gets. Which is not very.

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

Do I have anything else to say about her? No. And then this is one that she wears to go to tea with Mr. and Mrs. Elton. I like the color of this. And the sort of, like, taffeta of it.

Jojo

Ooh.

Sarah

Also I like whatever...

Jojo

That's a lovely green.

Sarah

...whatever trim is happening on the neckline and on the sleeves. What is it? ...Unclear. It's pretty. It just looks like a little dashed line. But it's like...

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

...it's like a cord or something, maybe? Piping? Really skinny piping?

Jojo

Maybe. I wonder if they did an actual basting stitch, or you know, a running stitch but with... with some kind of cord?

Sarah

What's that called... couching? Couching is like when...

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

...when you sew around a piece of cord.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Yeah, it looks kind of like that.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Okay. My thing for this one is gonna be kind of short, because it's just kind of like, "Pretty! Great. Love."

Jojo

[laughs] That's okay. That's kinda how I feel.

Sarah

Yeah. [laughs] Here's some Harriet. She didn't wear a lot of things that I was super, like, "gotta talk about it." I do like this plaid number. It's got these really pretty frogs on the closures.

Jojo

Oh yeah.

Sarah

Which, if you don't know, frogs are closures that are made of cord and they're little knots that hook-- that loop into each other. I've made them before, it's very hard.

Jojo

They're used on a lot of Asian garments as well, as closures.

Sarah

Yes, yes. This is where she was in the rain.

Jojo

Or, I should say, Chinese garments.

Sarah

Yeah. Yeah, specifically. Yeah, I had to make them for... I had to make frogs for "M. Butterfly," I think. It was really difficult.

Jojo

Oh, you MADE them?

Sarah

Yeah! [laughs]

Jojo

Interesting.

Sarah

We made the-- we covered the cord, and then you have to wrap it and stitch it in place. It was... I don't... I didn't like it.

Jojo

That's intense.

Sarah

I don't want to do it again.

Jojo

[laughs] "I didn't like it!" [both laugh] I will say, the plaid on this does remind me a lot of the kind of color palette that they used in "Clueless."

Sarah

Oooh, yeah!

Jojo

For that character.

Sarah

I also like how it's on the bias. The lines are going at a diagonal. It always makes it more interesting.

Jojo

Great job, construction team, for lining up those lines!

Sarah

Yep, it's perfect.

Jojo

It's beautiful.

Sarah

We love a good pattern match. Here's a shot of it standing up. So it doesn't go all the way down. Like, it's just the... oh, is it a jacket?

Jojo

It might be a Spencer jacket.

Sarah

It might be a little Spencer. Yeah.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Little cropped jacket. Oh, and I was gonna talk about bonnets. So, most of this movie, Gwyneth Paltrow is not wearing a bonnet when she's outside. And as we said in our last episode, in most periods, if you went outside, you had a hat on.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

And...

Jojo

And gloves.

Sarah

Yes. Oh, I think that blog I was reading said that bonnet-less women were-- that was a look that was reserved for prostitutes? And I was like, "Really?" [laughs]

Jojo

Well, I think it was kind of like a point of shame. I mean, it's the same as like, military men wearing their hats out of respect, right? You know, when they're uncovered by a roof, they're supposed to have some sort of a military hat on. So I think it's the same thing with women at this time? There was this idea of needing to wear one to show your piety or your status, I guess.

Sarah

Yeah, yeah. It's so funny. That's such a foreign idea now.

Jojo

Right, right. 'Cause hats are just so not a thing. [laughs]

Sarah

Yeah. But like, even as recently as the mid 1900s, you know, 1950s-1960s, people were still... if they were dressed up, if they were leaving the house, they were wearing a hat and gloves.

Jojo

Mmhmm. Yeah.

Sarah

And it's so funny how quickly that that kind of just like left our public...

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

...you know, rules. Or our consciousness.

Jojo

It's interesting to think about how that transition must have happened, too. Because the first people to not wear hats probably looked like they were being disrespectful. Or, you know... or a prostitute. [laughs]

Sarah

Well, yeah, and that would probably be like... yeah, counterculture of the 50s and 60s. I feel like those were some of the first people to really do that. And like, they were definitely seen as disrespectful. As like, hooligans, you know.

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

Hippies, or like, beatniks, or whatever.

Jojo

Anyway.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

Side note.

Sarah

I also think that the bonnets are a little bit small in this movie. Most of the time when I've seen this period, they're a little bit larger. But I'm also not sure if that's wrong or not. It's just like, what I've seen.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Usually. What do I have next? Oh, this is Ewan McGregor. Forgot he was in this movie.

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

He plays Frank Churchill.

Jojo

I forgot about that, too.

Sarah

And I haven't talked about any men yet. But I will say he is a big contrast to the other men in the movie. He is a lot flashier, a lot more of a dandy. And it's like, his long, wavy hair, his fancy top hat. He just-- he looks like he's always really caring about what he looks like. Sort of like a fop. Is that what we call it? I don't know.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

This is a good example of this. It's what he wears to the party, one of the many parties in this movie. [laughs] I feel like they're always going to the party. It's like a burgundy velvet coat with a lovely patterned waistcoat underneath.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

I think it's beautiful. And then I want to talk about Mrs. Elton, who is very silly.

Jojo

Oh, Mrs. Elton.

Sarah

She is a great contrast to all the other women in the movie, because she is kind of... she's rude. And she's kind of like-- I saw her described on the Wikipedia article for "Emma" as "nouveau riche," which means that she's recently wealthy, so she's kind of like, tacky about it.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

So she wears much darker colors than everybody else, which is an automatic way to contrast her.

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

And then her hair is also like-- I don't know, it's exaggerated in a way that makes her look comical.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

And these, like-- this style with the curls on the side, it's totally period. But it looks-- compared to the other women, it looks much more exaggerated.

Jojo

It's almost heading a little into crinoline era.

Sarah

Yeah. I think that when the curls move over the ear is when that's... a thing. I don't know, though. Somebody tell me if I'm wrong.

Jojo

Regency era still had some of the curls over the ear. But it was starting to move kind of around the back of the head and the side.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

I think, in the crinoline era. It was kind of more ringlets all the way down.

Sarah

Yeah. Like, yeah, that's definitely a hairstyle I associate with "Christmas Carol."

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

Oh, and she has this really weird bonnet. Get ready for this bonnet. [both laugh]

Jojo

Oh yeah! I did forget about that one.

Sarah

Look at that!

Jojo

It looks like she's surrounded by a clamshell. Like it's about to eat her head. [both laugh] And she's the pearl coming out of it.

Sarah

Also, this actress is doing a great job doing crazy eyes in this movie. [both laugh]

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

She's really selling it. This is a picture of the whole outfit. So like, compared to everybody else, she looks very silly.

Jojo

Yeah, it literally looks like an oyster shell on her head.

Sarah

Yeah, I've never seen a bonnet like this, if I'm honest.

Jojo

[laughs] That's a pretty unusual one.

Sarah

Yeah. I like her dark green outfit, though. It's pretty. She wears a lot of jewelry too. So that's another way that she contrasts with Emma and with the other women. She's like, very tacky and exaggerated. But that's... that's fun. That's fun to look at.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

All right. And then I'm just gonna finish up by talking about Mr. Knightley. And I don't have a lot to say. He just looks really good. [laughs]

Jojo

Yeah, this I do love this rendition of Mr. Knightley.

Sarah

He's good. He's really-- he's handsome, but kind of like in an understated way.

Jojo

Yeah, I think that's one of the things I loved about him. I randomly saw... I can't remember what I was watching. I was watching something else completely unrelated. And this was like, years after this movie came out. But I recognized him because he was playing a completely different character. And I was like, "why does this guy look so familiar?" And then I realized this was the last movie that I'd seen him in, and I was like, "oh, duh!" [both laugh] But yeah, it's so weird to see them out of the element that you're used to seeing them in.

Sarah

I feel that way about the guy who plays Mr. Darcy in the Keira Knightley "Pride and Prejudice."

Jojo

Yes!

Sarah

He's in "Succession," which could not be...

Jojo

I have not seen that.

Sarah

...a more different character. He plays an American guy who's like a total... I don't wanna say "twat." [both laugh] But he's kind of... kind of a putz.

Jojo

I saw him in-- I don't know if you've ever seen "Death at a Funeral."

Sarah

Yeah! That's an older one. Yeah.

Jojo

Yeah. He's in that one. And that's the other thing that I remembered him from. So I was like, "This is so weird."

Sarah

He's so dashing and so handsome in "Pride and Prejudice," and then it's like, you take him out of the Regency outfit and you're like, "oh, okay." He's just a guy.

Jojo

"Oh, you're not as cool."

Sarah

I mean, no offense, he's still handsome. But he's extra handsome in "Pride and Prejudice."

Jojo

That's kind of how I felt about this Mr. Bingley. Or... not Bingley. This Mr. Knightley, as well. I'm mixing all of my Austens now.

Sarah

They all end in Y! Bingley, Darcy, Knightley.

Jojo

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Sarah

Yeah, so he's in cool tones for most of the movie, which is, you know, nice. Like it. This picture is from when they're dancing. And I love how every Jane Austen movie has to have a dance scene where they're like, you know, touching hands and making eye contact as they kind of... step around each other.

Jojo

[laughs] Yeah. It's all about what's unsaid.

Sarah

Exactly.

Jojo

And the almost-but-not-quite-touching.

Sarah

Yep. Flirting in an 1815 kind of way.

Jojo

[laughs] Yes.

Sarah

And you can kind of see Mrs. Elton behind Emma over here. And she's wearing this very like... her dress kind of has a cape?

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

It kind of has a Grecian-like red drape that goes around the side, which I thought was fun.

Jojo

Oh, yeah, yeah, I can see that.

Sarah

I didn't pull any pictures of it. I think it's because I had too many pictures. And I counted all my pictures to make sure I could fit them in an Instagram post. And I deleted some.

Jojo

That's good.

Sarah

Yep, I learned my lesson.

Jojo

I was trying to do that with mine too. I was like, "Alright, how many can I fit in one square?" [both laugh]

Sarah

Exactly. And then-- yeah, so this is just from the final scene and he looks great, and I liked it. The end.

Jojo

The end! [both laugh] Yay, Emma 1990s!

Sarah

That's your 90s "Emma." I hope you enjoyed my really not-thorough analysis of it. [both laugh] Truly I was watching it and I was just like, "I don't know what to say except these are pretty."

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

And I like 'em.

Jojo

Yeah, definitely. I feel like, you know, this movie in particular is very much about like, "how do we make these characters look pretty?"

Sarah

Yeah, and I mean, Emma's world is-- like, the book opens by describing her as selfish and sheltered. So it is kind of like you're making a fantasy world. And I can see that in the sort of pastels and the dreamy landscapes and stuff.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

That was definitely successful in this version.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

All right, so...

Jojo

Yay!

Sarah

Your turn.

Jojo

Do you mind if we take a quick break?

Sarah

Yeah! [short musical sting]

Jojo

So of course, we are still covering "Emma," I'm going to be covering the 2020 version of this movie. And this actually, this movie was actually a directorial debut for Autumn de Wilde. So she is typically a photographer and video artist. She's done a lot of music videos. She's also taken a lot of really famous celebrity photos. So that's kind of what she was known for before. And she also does a lot of movie posters. So actually, all the movie posters for this new version of Emma were photographed by her as well.

Sarah

Oh, cool.

Jojo

And that's actually-- it's a pretty clear visual that you see throughout this movie, like you can definitely tell it's from like a photographer's eye. And the visuals are very much about like, "how can we make this the most picturesque scene ever?" It's very apparent throughout this movie. The costume designer for this was Alexandra Byrne, who we have met before, she again did "Murder on the Orient Express," which we covered before. But she's also done "Mary Queen of Scots," "Doctor Strange" a lot of the Avengers movies, "Guardians of the Galaxy," "Elizabeth: the Golden Age." And so in terms of her variety and her scale of stuff that she's done, she's pretty used to this large scale, grand scale of things.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So I would probably say this is probably a smaller project for her, if anything. So one of the things I wanted to talk about... we've already talked about the setting, this is still England, we're probably between 1815-1820 or so. One of the blogs that I was looking at was called Willow and Thatch. So these are a couple of the things they were talking about with her costumes. They said, "Alexandra Byrne's thoughtful choice of various Regency era garments and textiles give us a better grasp of each character's role in the story," which was very accurate. And then "throughout the period drama we are treated to visually pleasing dresses. Their production's overall palette is pastel, as if the mood board started with a box of macarons," which you absolutely see with this. It's definitely a delectable delight of treats. The iconic white muslins of the Regency are everywhere, as are small scale printed cottons. The first image that I have here is, of course, my favorite. It's the first Spencer jacket that we see her in. And not only is the cut and the silhouette of this Spencer jacket accurate, but you can kind of see here, I've placed it side by side with an actual museum piece. Which is... basically it was essentially copied from this museum piece that was an 1817 garment at the Chertsey Museum collection. So this is kind of like the perfect example of how a costume designer sort of simplifies an already existing garment, or kind of changes up small details. So that we're not directly copying an actual garment that exists, but that we're putting our own spin on it without completely just scratching a new idea or... you know, because none of this is like original ideas. It's talking about real garments that exist in a real time. And I love that the costume designer really tried to honor the accuracy of the time period by doing that. So that she kind of still took her own take on these details and then was still able to make it this beautiful garment. So not only is the piping pretty, you know, it's pretty similar to the original. Obviously she simplified the collar of this coat. And you can see it's a lot more busy up top.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

And that's one of the things I think that you'll realize with this newer version of "Emma," which I found really interesting, because she doesn't keep her in all pinks. She does have quite a variety of different colors that she kind of wears throughout this movie. But there is a sense of... she's always going to be done up very fancy. I think the costume designer talked a little bit about how basically she has, I think... sorry, I totally didn't write this down, which was me being unprepared. But Willow and Thatch also mentioned that there's, I believe, five or six total like Spencer jackets, and another six, what they called "pelisse." Which is another... it's spelled p-e-l-i-s-s-e. And it's also a formal type of outerwear that was worn during the Regency era. Which is basically kind of fitted on top, and it sort of still meets at the empire waist. So right under the bust, but then it actually flows all the way to the floor. So the Spencer jacket is sort of a shortened version of that without the tail-- the long, you know, floor length coat, part of it. And then the pelisse is sort of a longer version of that, with that same idea of the fitted top.

Sarah

I didn't know that word. Today I learned.

Jojo

Yes. So one of the interesting things about all of those outerwear things was that the blog actually talked a lot about how the costume designer really took the time to understand what this woman's real closet would have looked like. She's someone who is wealthier, she's someone who comes from an upper class, she would have had the money--you know, the spending money--for shopping, that would have been common at this time for ladies of her age to be going out and buying all of these things. And one of the other things that I do love about the way Autumn has directed this movie is that she shows a lot of that "behind the scenes" of how people get ready.

Sarah

Mmm.

Jojo

And how people actually dress. So like, there's a scene where we see Emma actually getting a pelisse tailored to fit her. So she has, you know, they show the unfinished pelisse coat. It sounds like I'm saying "police coat."

Sarah

PO-lice, yeah. [laughs]

Jojo

But... it's like a pel... pelisse.

Sarah

Pelisse.

Jojo

I don't know how to say it properly. I'm probably saying it wrong. But the pelisse coat basically is left there with all the tailoring...

Sarah

The tacks.

Jojo

...stitching.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

That's in there. And then it also shows the pleating and all the different details that are on there as if she's getting it finished. And in the next scene, they show the finished coat after she's gotten it completed. So like, it really shows you that process of not just Emma's clothes, but also the world around how these clothes are made. There's a scene where they even show Mr. Knightley, how he gets out of his clothes and then puts on his next outfit.

Sarah

Ooh.

Jojo

So yeah, there's just a lot of like fine details. I think Autumn, as a photographer, is always paying attention to these things, I'm sure. And so you can see that detail is applied in the rest of the movie as well. So I've wanted to start with this because I do love the Spencer jacket. I think it's just so attractive. And it's so beautiful. And the fact that this much detail went into this. And even then, she's "simplified" this from the original. It just goes to show how much detail went into those garments at that time, because those were things you were wearing on a more regular basis. And the Spencer jacket was not meant to keep you warm, it was a typically a lighter fabric, or it was a lighter garment. So the fact that this is something that would have been worn probably out in public much more often than, say, a winter coat, it means it's getting a lot of screen time, for lack of a better word.

Sarah

Right.

Jojo

So onto the next one. This is just another outfit because, again, we talked about bonnets with the old "Emma" as well. And bonnets were a very big feature in this movie, she's pretty much always seen with a bonnet anytime she goes outside.

Sarah

Wow!

Jojo

So again, really, really accurate to the time. Really paid attention to the world and how they lived and what they would have been wearing. This is also just another really quick zoom in of this beautiful sleeve.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

Like, look at the way they've layered that, it's pretty incredible.

Sarah

That's amazing.

Jojo

And then the other thing I wanted to focus on, too, was just that attention to detail with the inside of the bonnet being covered in lace. Because most of the other ones... I mean, all the bonnets have a certain layer of lace on the interior of the brim. Which you'll see in a couple of the other photos I'm gonna pull up. But the fact that her entire interior is just lace on top of that pink is pretty incredible.

Sarah

Pretty luxurious.

Jojo

As are a lot of her other bonnets. It's just kind of... I think that's where she kind of over accessorizes, is on her hats.

Sarah

And lace is expensive in this time.

Jojo

Yes, very much so.

Sarah

I feel like bonnets are usually like the first thing to go in these kind of movies.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Where people are like, "We want them to look beautiful to a young, modern audience."

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

"So the bonnets looks so stuffy and weird. So we're just gonna take away the bonnets." So, it's so interesting that this is a movie full of bonnets! [laughs]

Jojo

Yeah, definitely. So this was the next image I wanted to focus on. And again, this is a better example of a pelisse. So you can kind of see, it still has that sort of fitted top that we saw with the Spencer, but it continues down onto the sides here. Some of the pelisses actually closed in the front, this one just happens to close over the sides a little bit. But I do love this color. So this one, actually, was really important. Because one of the things that the costume designer did was she contrasted Emma's character to show her wealth by putting her in that fitted pelisse. And then for the Harriet Smith character, they actually put her in a red cape. So the red cloak was actually considered and called a "riding hood."

Sarah

Hmmm.

Jojo

Basically, that's what it is. But that was actually a typical standard for country outerwear. And so they actually showed a picture of a watercolor that was... I can't remember who it was written to be by on the website. But basically, it depicted life in the Regency era. So it was a whole book of things that people would wear, you know, the habits of that day. So the accuracy of just taking those garments, that not only put Harriet Smith at a very different class level from our main character, but also took accurate clothing from that time period. I just... again, kudos to this costume designer, she really did her research for this. And I love that she did kind of marry the idea of being as historically accurate as possible, while still taking her vision as a costume designer to a different level.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

The other thing that you'll see here, and you don't really see it in this image, and I didn't choose to focus on it specifically, is that they're in pretty much the similar color palette. But you can see that underneath, Harriet is actually wearing kind of... it's like a Spencer jacket shape. But it's actually a knit maroon cardigan.

Sarah

Really!

Jojo

So I just found that really interesting. Again, kind of just making... and we've talked about this in the past, how kind of knitwear--or sweaters--tend to make you a little bit more casual. Or it kind of brings down the classiness of a garment? I don't want to say that, because that's not necessarily always true. But there's a softness about knitwear that is not going to give you the same effect as something that's a little more structured, like this pelisse.

Sarah

It makes you a little more homespun, a little more country.

Jojo

Yes. And that is very much what Harriet Smith is. I mean, even in the way that her bonnet is decorated. It's so simple next to this ginormous, you know, velvet thing that Emma has on.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

This is probably one of her more simplified hats, which I just thought was kind of funny. But you know, again, it's such a striking and very saturate image that we see her in here. And I think that's one of the things that really characterizes this movie, in comparison to the old "Emma," is that it kind of feels like they've like pumped up all the colors, and it's much more saturate than the Gwenyth Paltrow version.

Sarah

And do we think that that's like a... 1990s versus a 2020s thing? Like, the ideal of...

Jojo

It could be. I do feel like, I don't know, I can't remember. I'm trying to remember if it was like, we just didn't have a lot of saturated colors. Like it just wasn't a thing to be super vibrant in the 90s?

Sarah

I just-- I think that that one, you can definitely see... the 90s--a lot of 90s fashion--is really streamlined, you know, like Cher's white dress in "Clueless" that's literally just a tank top.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

So, that kind of thing, I could see the 90s in the 90s "Emma."

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

So I wonder... I'm looking for the 2020s. I'm like, "What are the hallmarks of the 2020s in this movie?"

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

I feel like we won't know until 10 years from now, you know?

Jojo

That's true.

Sarah

But it's interesting to think about.

Jojo

And I will say, you know, as we've been looking at a lot of the recent things that have been coming out, the other thing I was thinking about when you said that was "Bridgerton," right?

Sarah

Yes!

Jojo

It's a lot of that same... it is pastel, but it is that kind of "macaron color" world, where it's a lot of candy colored pastels, you know?

Sarah

That one's making a big splash because of how bright the colors are.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

And then this... that made me think of that Hulu series about Catherine the Great. Is it just called "Catherine"?

Jojo

Oh, yes, "Catherine." Uh-huh.

Sarah

Where she wears that hot pink gown. So like...

Jojo

Or, is it called "The Great"?

Sarah

"The Great." That's what it is. Thank you. [laughs]

Jojo

Yes. Yeah, I know what you're talking about. But yeah, I think that's definitely coming back in, especially with period stuff. Like, we're seeing a lot of that period, but we're amping up the color so much more.

Sarah

That's how we're making it look modern now, is by like putting a colorful twist on it.

Jojo

Yeah. Which is so fascinating!

Sarah

Yeah!

Jojo

You color forecast, I guess.

Sarah

But I love it. I love it because I love color. So I'm all for it.

Jojo

Me too. So again, I think... you know, same thing. We apply the same kind of color saturation to the menswear as well. And this is our Mr. Knightley, who... I think they made him a little bit more rugged than the previous Mr. Knightley, which I love. Johnny Flynn plays our Mr. Knightley in this version.

Sarah

I love him.

Jojo

And again, I didn't show these pictures because it's a whole scene that happens where he gets into this outfit. And it's like, he comes from walking because he walks everywhere.

Sarah

Aww.

Jojo

So there's this whole thing about how he doesn't take carraiges because he just likes to walk outside instead. And so he comes into his house. And then he gets... like, the first scene, we see him and he starts off naked, and then he's putting on all of his clothes. So you literally see him put on, you know, his shirt first. And then his servant actually helps him put on his ascot. And then you see him put on the vest, and then you see him tuck the shirt into the pants, and then button up the front fly pants. So it's like you see that whole process, and then you see his servant, help him get his final coat on. And I love that the director has honored that process, because that is a part of what they were doing every day to get dressed. And that was a part of who they were, and a part of their society. And all of that made that culture. And why, that whole idea of flirting and dancing, all of that was part of that world. Like, they didn't have TVs to just sit around and watch like we do. So...

Sarah

They spent a lot of time getting dressed. Getting dressed was like a big part of your day.

Jojo

Yes.

Sarah

So I like that.

Jojo

And it also goes to show his wealth, because he has a servant who helps him do all that. And he does live in this huge Abbey. And one of the biggest things that happens at the end of this movie is that he says he's willing to give all of that up so that he can stay with Emma. Because he knows she'll never leave her father's house, and her father will never leave his house. So it's this huge sacrifice, because you've seen all of the things that he's giving up, and you see the wealth and the prosperity that he lives in. And all of that goes to show, like when he puts on this final layer of his coat. It's this... I mean, I can't do it justice in this photo. But it's this beautiful, buttery, almost orange-yellow?

Sarah

Caramel.

Jojo

That is... yeah, it's a very beautiful caramel color. So when he first puts it on, he is wearing this dark navy blue underneath. And then he's got this complimentary yellow on top. Again, it just goes to show the level of wealth, the level of prosperity that he comes from, and he's a very educated man. So everything is very clean, and everything is very put together. Even when he walks to Emma's house in the first scene after he's gotten dressed, he talks about how basically he's walked through an entire field, and his boots have been left un-muddy, you know. So it's just this whole idea of his persona, like there's this very clean... he's very put together, he takes very good care of his appearance. And that's something I think a lot of this film focuses on, is the idea of each person and how they interact with everyone else. We talked about Emma being this, you know, kind of naive and sort of spoiled personality. And I feel like with Gwyneth Paltrow's version, it's a little bit more pithy? Whereas I feel like this version, Emma is very... I don't want to say "sociopathic," but it's almost like she just doesn't know how to empathize. Like...

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

...she just constantly gets annoyed at everything. And she's very like, "Well, you're not meeting my standard." And she just doesn't know how to interact. Like, she knows how to help people, because that's what she likes doing. But it's always for a specific reason, or there's always some kind of motive behind it. So I think-- I talked to a few friends who saw this movie after having seen the other "Emma," and a lot of the criticisms were that she just wasn't likeable. And I was like, "But that is kind of who her character is," to a certain extent, until we get to the end.

Well, she shows a lot of growth over the course of the story. So...

Yes.

Sarah

...it's okay for her not to be likable in the beginning, because we need to see her learn her lessons, you know, and grow.

Jojo

Yeah. And I think the other reason, maybe, that I like this movie a little bit more was because I also felt like I could relate a lot with this version of Emma. [laughs] Which sounds really bad. But like, I think I tend to have that mentality. Sometimes I'm kind of like, "Well, why can't you just do this?"

Sarah

Oh, yeah, same. [laughs]

Jojo

And I think that's very much how she's portrayed in this movie. It's that kind of like, "Well, you can't be right, because I'm right." [laughs]

Sarah

Right, right. Yeah.

Jojo

I think, you know, when she does finally get to that point where she's able to change, you see more of that redeeming factor, I think, at the very end. And even at the end, when they have their whole final talk, there's this cathartic moment between the two of them where they're both kind of like, "I know that you can never accept me because I'm this way. And I do all these things, I've lectured you, and I've been so blunt and blah, blah, blah," and then they still come together and say, "But I still love you, in spite of all that."

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So, again, I just felt like it was a really good portrayal of that relationship. Okay, so moving on. So this was the image that I meant to talk about earlier, where it's that watercolor scene of what they wore that time. And it was those white muslin dresses that were so iconic of the Regency era, and then those red capes that they talked about. So it was typically worn by students, which, in Harriet Smith's case--particularly in this movie--they basically have her because she hasn't... basically, they don't know who her parents are. And she doesn't find out until the very end who her father actually is, because she isn't of age yet. So she's very young, she's kind of student age. And so there's a couple scenes where they actually show Harriet Smith walking into a... it's like, it's not really an orphanage, but it's basically like a boarding house, I guess. Or a board house. And all of the students, anytime they walk outside with the teacher, are always in these red capes. So it's this line of basically like the Madeline girls, you know.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

Where they line up in two lines, and they all wear the red capes and walk around.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So I wanted to put that in there, just because I think it does... [zooms in too far] Ooh, didn't mean to do that. [both laugh] Because it does show just the accuracy of the research that this costume designer took from. And there's a couple different looks, too, that are kind of like that. So then the other costume that I really wanted to focus on... one thing that I haven't mentioned with this movie is that there's... I think this has been kind of the case with a lot of recent movies. "The Favourite" is another movie that kind of does the same thing, where it takes a period and then makes it very comical-- kind of a parody, almost, of that period. While trying to be...

Sarah

I would love to talk about "The Favourite" in the future.

Jojo

Huh?

Sarah

I would love to talk about "The Favourite".

Jojo

Oh, yes. Yes. Absolutely.

Sarah

The costume design in that movie is so interesting. And like, the story behind it is so... anyway. So cool.

Jojo

Side note! [laughs] Next movie. But I do love that in this particular version of "Emma," Bill Nye... he is basically the comic relief. Like, there's nothing at all serious about him. And I kind of just feel like the director was just like, "Just be yourself and just do whatever you want!" Like, that's kind of how I felt with this movie. Because half the time he's, like, jumping down the stairs, and he sort of just makes this very comical idea of, like... doing his Bill Nighy thing. Where he sort of just says something, and then it kind of just disarms you a little bit. And then he kind of just moves on, as if he didn't say it. [laughs]

Sarah

God, I love him.

Jojo

One of my favorite looks for him is this. It's like loungewear. And you can't-- there's a couple other pictures, I'll show in a second, where it shows the full length. Because this only shows you the top. But I love that the costume designer just made him blend into his background to become his wallpaper, or his chair.

Sarah

Yeah!

Jojo

And it really goes to show that he really is attached to this house, like he has become a part of this house, he will never leave this house. He was born and will die in this house. And he will become part of the house eventually, you know? So it's this idea that he's already starting to kind of blend in. And there's a couple moments where he kind of... he asks his servants to place fire separators... or like, they're room separators. But he has two different levels of room separators. So he's got the regular ones. And then he's got a kind of knee-height one. So there's a couple scenes where he's just like, surrounded by room separators. [both laugh] But he's created his own little room, and he's sitting in this chair and everything is sort of this over-patterned brocade. So he's just kind of blending into his own house. [laughs]

Sarah

That's wonderful.

Jojo

But the other thing that I wanted to say about this magical garment is that it's not just the vest that matches, but it looks almost like a long smoking jacket.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

Obviously it kind of is double-breasted, kind of buttons over itself, but it actually reaches the floor. So then the moments where he basically comes into a room--there's a couple scenes where he either runs into the room very quickly, or he jumps down the stairs--he's in this look. So you kind of just see him sort of create a little Superman cape with it. [both laugh] 'Cuz it's just this long garment. It's so Bill Nighy, and I feel like it works really well for his character.

Sarah

It's interesting because it's almost like it's a robe or a dressing gown. But I've never seen a robe or dressing gown with this style of collar. This very Regency menswear collar. So interesting.

Jojo

Definitely not. Yeah, if anything, I feel like this might have been one of the looks that might have been more of a design... created look? As opposed to some of the other ones. Because I'm not sure how much historical accuracy was taken from this particular look.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

So some of the other things that I wanted to focus on--and most of these I'm going to go through pretty quickly--but this was that kind of jacket I was telling you about, where they really show the tailoring. And you can see, a couple of her coats... there's a few of them that have this same kind of tuck-pleating that's in the back in a radial fashion. I dunno... how do you describe that? It's like small pinched tucks in the back of the clothing that you can top stitch over?

Sarah

They're like a little... a little pinch, and then you sew it.

Jojo

Yeah.

Sarah

Like a tiny little seam. If you need to know more just Google it. [both laugh]

Jojo

But again, you also have the Instagram photos.

Sarah

Yeah, you can see it.

Jojo

That kind of gives you an idea of what I'm talking about. But she actually has this on two of her coats, on the yellow one that's in the cover photo for this movie, as well as this blue one. But she features that a lot, because a lot of the fullness that was happening from the 17th century--rather than being pushed out and kept full, like it was at the end of the 1700s--because we're going more column-like, all of that fullness was actually nicely pleated into the back. And so that's where all of that fullness ended up. So it kind of gave you almost a little train in the back.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So you see that with a lot of her pelisse coats.

Sarah

That's also a way to add visual interest without putting a bunch of trim on something. It's just using the fabric and manipulating it.

Jojo

Mmhmm.

Sarah

It's a way to make it look designed, but it's not fussy or complicated. I mean, it was probably was complicated to put together. But it doesn't look complicated. You know what I mean?

Jojo

Right. It looks simple.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

So another zoom in for one of her other Spencer jackets, this gray one, which I love. It's just... I think the sheer amount of detail on this is just beautiful. And even just the small pleated... epaulets?

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

They're not really quite epaulets. But it's like a sleeve puff that she's added on her sleeves. And she also has that same ruffling around her collar as well. So you can see it on her neck. Very, very delicate.

Sarah

Like a cupcake liner, almost.

Jojo

Yeah, exactly. So this is when she first meets Trank... Wow, can't talk. [both laugh] This is when she first meets Frank Churchill, or at least sees him. She hasn't officially met him yet. But I wanted to focus on just the detail of this coat, and just it showing the wealth and the prosperity that she comes from. As well as the-- again, the lace interior of her bonnet. Just... everything is so put together in this look.

Sarah

Beautiful.

Jojo

Then for this look, I wanted to show the comparison between Harriet and Emma. So Harriet, at this point has started to dress a little bit nicer. One of the things I was reading about on the same blog--that was kind of going through and sort of analyzing all of these historical accuracies--they talked a lot about how during this time, women actually would have worn a colored slip underneath.

Sarah

Oh!

Jojo

Because the white was actually the iconic dress of that time.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So rather than wearing a colored, you know, white frock, they would actually have the color underneath for the slip. And then the frock would always be white on top. So it would allow for that color to show through. And it would be a much more subtle version of that colored version... frock, I guess.

Sarah

That's so interesting.

Jojo

So I love that they kind of showed this comparison between the two of them. We're still keeping Emma in her pinks. And likewise, they both have their outerwear, their gloves, as well as their bonnets that they're wearing everywhere. Harriet is obviously much more simplified in the... like, just the level of over-the-top that she's wearing. Specifically in their bonnets, I wanted to focus on how much more accoutrements Emma has on her bonnet in comparison to Harriet. And also just the fact that where Harriet has placed this bow makes her look even younger than she already is, in comparison to Emma. Whereas Emma's kind of more gathered look is much more classical, and it looks a little bit more mature, which... we kind of see that relationship between the two of them. What else did I write on here? Nope. That's all I had to say about that one. [both laugh]

Sarah

Great!

Jojo

Okay. Moving on to the next one. One thing they did mention in that, which I guess I should have mentioned... they were talking about how, you know, it's possible that Harriet didn't necessarily get all those for herself. Maybe they were things that either she got as a hand-me-down from Emma, and then she figured out trims and things that Emma maybe would have suggested when they go shopping.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

Which is very common, I think, in this time, because clothing was so much more precious. It wasn't just fast, quick fashion, like we have today. Where, you know, once it's done being used, you just toss it.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

Most of these dresses, you would either hand repair it yourself in order to fix it, or you change something up, add some new fabric, to try and make it more updated. As opposed to completely throwing out the whole dress and just saying, "Alright, well, time to buy a new dress."

Sarah

Yup.

Jojo

Because no one really has the money to do that.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

So I do love that that could have been like a little backstory for Harriet, where she got some of these dresses. Because some of her dresses do look like they could be older versions of what Emma wore earlier in the movie as well.

Sarah

That makes sense. I mean, clothing being disposable is a very new idea. Right?

Jojo

Yes, very much so. Okay, so then for this one I really just wanted to pull this scene because... again, it goes back to that whole candy striper... you know, like pastel that we were talking about. Each of these girls is, you know... these are the girls--are the students in the boarding house that Harriet is staying with. But I love that amongst all these girls, she's the one wearing the most atrocious looking outfit.

Sarah

[laughs]

Jojo

I mean, it's just so mismatched. Like, she's got this very multicolored cardigan sweater.

Sarah

Yeah, thats...

Jojo

This isn't the best image of it, because it was literally... like, I took a photo of the screen. So it's a little more kind of warmly washed out.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

But I love that you can see just how different she looks in comparison to even the girls around her. Which, you know, she's not that much lower class than maybe some of these girls are, but because she has no parentage, and because she doesn't know where she came from... the idea is that Harriet Smith's status is just so far below everyone else in that town. Because she has no way of knowing where she came from.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So yes, I just love that this is such a huge contrast to everyone around her. So that's why I pulled that image.

Sarah

That's fun. It's very different looking.

Jojo

Let's see. Okay, so the other thing that I wanted to focus on, too, was not just how this... you know, because this is probably one of the more muted palettes throughout this entire movie, in comparison to everything else. And this is when they're actually visiting Miss Bates's house, and they're first seeing... I just forgot her name. But... Jane! Jane Fairfax. [laughs]

Sarah

I got SO confused. I had to have the Wikipedia up the whole time, because there's so many characters.

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

And this happened to me when I read the book, too. I listened to it as an audiobook and I was like, "...WHO?! I forgot who all these people are!" [both laugh]

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

There's a lot of characters in this story.

Jojo

So Jane Fairfax, in this movie, is the one that basically ends up marrying Frank Churchill. And so there's this whole hidden marriage that they have. But Miss Bates, I believe, is Jane Fairfax's cousin, or aunt, or somehow related to her. And so Jane Fairfax basically comes to the house, and Miss Bates as the town gossip... and interestingly enough, in this movie, she is not quite as plain as the one in the 90s version. But the way that they've made her kind of dull and not quite so interesting, I guess, is to put her in these like really tiny... I want to say "prairie flowers." I don't know if you know what I'm talking about. It's a very prairie-look pattern.

Sarah

Like a.... what's it called? Is it called a "ditzy" floral print? It's like when it's teeny tiny?

Jojo

Oh, I don't know if that's the official term.

Sarah

I'm gonna look it up. Google it.

Jojo

Maybe someone out there can tell us as well. [both laugh]

Sarah

Is that her on the left?

Jojo

Yes.

Sarah

Oh, okay.

Jojo

So Miss Bates is the one that's to the very left. So Harriet Smith is in the middle, and she looks quite miserable here. Emma, interestingly enough, you know, this is the first time we really see her in this kind of plaid gingham. But I love that even here, she's kind of the most... the most nicely decorated, I guess, out of the three. Like, this jacket actually gets recycled quite a few times on Harriet, because it's probably the one coat that she owns. And then Miss Bates, a couple of her other scenes, she's always in something pretty dull and pretty muted or understated. Until Emma's wedding, where she's in a slightly more turquoise color. But most of her other looks are very similar to this, they all have that kind of really tiny floral print.

Sarah

So I googled it, and "ditzy" refers to a very small scale print. And it's most commonly used for florals. So I don't know if that was a term at this time, but it is now.

Jojo

Right. Okay, cool.

Sarah

So now we know.

Jojo

I'm learning new things too! [both laugh] So I do love that one of the things they feature on Miss Bates quite often, they do put her in this. And it's not quite a mob cap, but it definitely looks a little bit more like the mob cap that they had in the 90s movie as well.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

Which, again, you can see a lot of the same translations, in terms of costumes, are copied over from the 90s version of "Emma," but they kind of updated it, they changed a few things. And I think she also tried to honor the historical accuracy a little bit more. But one of the other things that I find really great on Miss Bates is that they always have her in this kind of... it almost looks like an Elizabethan collar.

Sarah

I was gonna say that.

Jojo

But she always has this kind of like crazy frou-frou thing around her neck.

Sarah

It's like a ruff.

Jojo

Yes. But it's like... it's not a uniform ruff like you would see in the Elizabethan era. It's very organic and kind of just flies all over the place every time she talks, which is very much like her personality.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

In this movie, she talks so so much and the whole idea is that she's constantly annoying Emma, and she's, you know, she's kind of... I don't want to even say she's the town gossip, because it's not like anything she says is malicious. She just likes to share information about herself.

Sarah

She talks in the book way too much. I would space out. Like, it would be five minutes. A whole monologue.

Jojo

[laughs]

Sarah

I was like, "is this really in the book? I can't believe it."

Jojo

I imagine that that's how these conversations must have felt, with whoever this real person was that Jane Austen was maybe inspired by.

Sarah

[laughs]

Jojo

But yeah, anyways, I just wanted to show this comparison of the three characters, because it really does go to show how much costume can, you know, identify character. And very quickly give us that first five second impression.

Sarah

I mean, yeah.

Jojo

Just from looking at this image.

Sarah

She looks so different from the other two women.

Jojo

Yeah, yeah. And in terms of class, you can already see the distinction between the three ladies as well. So I did want to point that out in this particular image. So I'm not going to spend a ton of time on this one, because I actually wasn't super hugely a fan of this dress. I didn't think it was ugly or anything, but I did... this is the dress that she basically goes to the first ball with. And it's... I believe it's Frank... no, not Frank Churchill's ball. It's another ball. There's so many balls in this movie.

Sarah

[laughs] Like I said, they're constantly at a party.

Jojo

Again, she doesn't wear this for very long. But I wanted to show this. So this is actually the museum version, I believe. And then they kind of essentially recreated it in the version that was used for the movie. So you can see very clear, like, she's definitely copied this dress. Almost exactly. But the other thing I wanted to mention here... nope, didn't write notes about this one. [both laugh] Sometimes that happens! But I think one of the things I wanted to say was that during this time, they mentioned that knitting was also created. Because the bobbinet machine... oh, I did write it down! So in 1809...

Sarah

Oh!

Jojo

This is the fun fact I wrote down, the mass production of line netting was available, because John Heathcoat created, or invented, the bobbinet machine.

Sarah

Oooh.

Jojo

So it allowed for this kind of colored net that was used on the top layer of a lot of these dresses for this time. So not only was he able to get it in color, because it was be able to be mass manufactured much more quickly. But he was also able to create netting much more quickly. So again, just the idea of just having the accuracy of the time period, having history really imbue itself in this costume design and in the process of research. So I did love that.

Sarah

I love the museum one, it looks almost like it's glowing.

Jojo

Yeah. Yeah

Sarah

I love that effect. It's so pretty.

Jojo

Yeah, and you don't quite get the same effect on her dress...

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

...but I can see where she kind of tried to get that same idea. And obviously, having the layer underneath, it could have just been the fabric that she chose for this particular image. This is also just an Instagram image. It wasn't actually from the movie.

Sarah

Right.

Jojo

So lighting doesn't always do us any favors, unfortunately.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

All right. The next one I wanted to focus on was her ball gown dress, and this was for Frank Churchill's ball. So she's got this beautiful... again, going back to that cream-colored, the iconic white dress. In this case, it's actually not a muslin, it looks like it's almost a chiffon or maybe... not really sure, maybe an organza on top?

Sarah

Mmm.

Jojo

It doesn't look like it kind of drapes as well, but I love that on this one, there's such a three dimensional effect with the leaves that she's got on here. And the flowers, the three dimensional flowers also continue on the hem of this dress.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So it kind of encircles the hem. But I love, love this image, not just because it also showcases the traditional tuxedo on the men, but also just the kind of ethereal quality of the white on her. And even though this isn't the climactic dress that she wears, for any reason, the fact that this is the ball that she's trying to dress up for Frank Churchill--because she still thinks he's in love with her and doesn't know about Jane Fairfax yet. But yeah, so, I just love this image. And it's just so beautiful. And again, hair, I think we're pretty accurate in this time period as well. Or, the hair designer.

Sarah

Looks lovely.

Jojo

And again, just those small ringlets in the front, and even just the ringlets in the back.

Sarah

There's... it's such a tight little curl. Really pretty.

Jojo

Yeah, and she definitely uses that a lot in this movie for all the characters. So then, again, this is not in order. This is kind of just by whatever is on my Google Drive. [both laugh] So I love this idea for Frank Churchill because, again, it's almost like this watermelon idea. We talked a lot about green and that pink.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

When they're combined, it does give us that watermelon effect. And so this is when she first gets introduced to Frank Churchill and they're finally talking. So she's back in her kind of pink Spencer jacket, and then he's in kind of a complimentary, almost sage-colored green, as opposed to a brighter green. But I love that he's got this little pink popping out and then his vest is actually pretty elaborately embroidered.

Sarah

Mmm.

Jojo

And I love that the colors have been combined in this way. Because it definitely... it's their way of showing him as the dandy, without being crazy over-the-top, because most of his other coats are just... I would say just as colorful as even, say, Mr. Knightley is. Because Mr. Knightley has some pretty rich colors on him.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

But I think they tried to kind of give him that dandy effect by adding other things, like embroidery and topical surface treatments and textures. So one of the last dresses... this is actually the one that basically she gets proposed to in, by Mr. Knightley. And I love that we've returned to this kind of green, and the embroidered delicate, very detailed idea on her dress. We still have that white. But now instead of having the color underneath and showing through like we did in some of the other scenes, we have this new embroidered idea on both her puff sleeves, as well as on the actual skirt itself. We're also bringing in some, I think, more contemporary color palettes because we've got this kind of ombre dyed belt, which probably was not common during that time.

Sarah

It's beautiful, though. I love that little touch.

Jojo

I do. And it's interesting because, you know, we talked about her being more mature and having a more classical silhouette. But this is actually one of the times where she actually has a bow, but it's kind of off the side. It's not right in the dead center, like we saw with Harriet. So, a couple other photos of the dress. So this is the last scene of her talking with Harriet. So yeah, it's interesting because, again, this is also the period--or the point in the story--where Emma has finally kind of realized that she's made all these, you know, kerfuffles, with all of the matchmaking that she has been trying to do. She's messed everything up. And she's finally realized that, you know, she was standing in the way of her friend this whole time. And so now she's trying to be sacrificially out of the way.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

While also trying to come to terms with her own love for the same person.

Sarah

Yep.

Jojo

So again, that whole delicacy of the green and the flowers in particular, that motif--even though it does kind of hit a little bit more... the nail on the head--but this idea of growth, that she's trying to become this new person, that she's trying to understand from a different perspective and not just look at her own selfishness.

Sarah

Also green versus pink. It's like green is more earthier, it's more natural, so going away from girly, frilly into more natural--of nature--colors. I mean, pink occurs in nature, obviously. But you know what I mean.

Jojo

Right.

Sarah

Like, it's almost like she's more grounded.

Jojo

Yes, yes. Literally. [both laugh]

Sarah

Literally. Like a tree.

Jojo

Okay, and then, of course...

Sarah

Oh my gosh.

Jojo

...some of the final images, I just wanted to focus on her wedding dress. But yes, her governess at the beginning, Miss Taylor, we see her wedding in the beginning. And it's much more like... she's dressed much more down to earth. It's a very country wedding. Like, you can just see the level of sophistication that Emma has in this image, as opposed to Miss Taylor. And then I love that they've put Johnny Flynn in this beautiful rich blue.

Sarah

Gorgeous.

Jojo

It's like a blue velvet, for his tail coat, which actually he does wear quite a lot of that color--his vest underneath that caramel, buttery-yellow coat that he had on earlier is also in this kind of same color palette. So I love that the costume designer has put him in these really yummy colors that really contrast, and kind of compliment, his hair as well.

Sarah

Mmhmm.

Jojo

So I think she did a great job with that, so... good on you. [laughs]

Sarah

He also has beautiful blue eyes. So I think that...

Jojo

Yes.

Sarah

...putting him in a blue that kind of echoes his eyes, that's very nice.

Jojo

Yeah, absolutely. So just really briefly, I just wanted to touch base on who becomes Mrs. Elton. And so in this case, obviously they've still made fun of Mrs. Elton. She's this, you know... like we mentioned, very she's recently come into all this money... with this crazy hair. Like, they've literally created a bow and slicked it back in her hair.

Sarah

It looks like... like a "hair show" hairstyle. You know?

Jojo

Yeah, absolutely.

Sarah

You've seen hair shows, right? Yeah, it looks like that.

Jojo

Yeah, like I almost thought this was an actual fake bow that they put on top of her hair. And then I realized it was literally like they had slicked and like...

Sarah

Shellacked.

Jojo

...it almost looks like they glued hair? Around the shape? And then just left it there.

Sarah

[laughs] Yeah. Wow.

Jojo

So yes, they've obviously used a little bit of the curls on the side to indicate the time period, but like, the bow up there is just... it's just so out there.

Sarah

It's so wacky-looking. [laughs] I love it.

Jojo

And the fact that she, again, has these crazy eyes. And it kind of just looks like she's this weird goldfish with all these orange colors she's got underneath. [both laugh] So yes, I just wanted to focus on her because, you know... Mr. Elton, in this case, is already hilarious enough, but then he's got this even crazier, kookier wife now that has to rein him in. But yes, casting wise, I think this movie did phenomenal. Costume wise, it's so beautiful to look at. So if you haven't seen this movie, I highly recommend it. And it's also pretty historically accurate. So yes, that's my take on the 2020 "Emma"! Woohoo!

Sarah

Yay! Great job. I'm excited to watch. I've been like meaning... like I said, I'm a procrastinator, and I never get around to watching movies. I've wanted to see it since it came out.

Jojo

Oh, you and me both. [laughs]

Sarah

Yeah, so I should watch it this week.

Jojo

This is why we're friends, Sarah. [both laugh]

Sarah

I just like... probably a lot of people can relate to this. But I'll be like, "I don't have te mental capacity for a movie right now." So I'll instead watch, like, six hours of TV. And it's like, how is that different? It's not. [both laugh]

Jojo

I feel like I'm the same way. It's like I have to be in the right mood for a specific movie. [laughs] It's harder when it's a show, where it's like, "I have to find out what happens next!"

Sarah

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, shows just... they keep you hooked.

Jojo

Yep, yep.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

All right. So that's our episode for "Emma." Hopefully, you enjoyed the side by side comparison.

Sarah

Yeah!

Jojo

And if you have seen both movies, you can let us know whether you feel like we were accurate or not accurate, or just tell us more about some of the things we had questions about.

Sarah

Yeah.

Jojo

All right. Well, that's all we have for today's episode. I'm Jojo.

Sarah

I'm Sarah. Thank you so much for listening.

Jojo

Yep. Bye!

Sarah

Catch you the next one. Bye!

[OUTRO]

Jojo

Thank you for listening to The Costume Plot! You can follow us on Twitter and Instagram at @thecostumeplot. If you have a question, comment, or movie suggestion you can email us at [email protected].

Sarah

Our theme music is by Jesse Timm, and our artwork is by Jojo Siu. Please rate and review us wherever you listen to your podcasts.

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