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ianthe-is-a-bitch-and-i-love-her · 3 years

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Flesh, Part 1

Excerpt from Memoirs of a Flesh Eater, never published

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And now we come to what you’ve all been waiting for, the meat of this book {Editing Note: Boooo}. The gory details, such as they are, of how we acquire our flesh. It’s a topic that’s captured the public imagination for a long time - we’ve all heard plenty of lurid stories and speculation all our lives. I frankly wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve skipped straight to this chapter to finally hear it straight from the monster’s mouth. I’ll do my best to satisfy your curiosity. Understand, though - this topic is deadly serious, and more than almost any other subject I’ve covered, I’m aware of the danger inherent in revealing this. If the information I lay out here compromises these avenues of flesh, people will die for it. I will tell you as much as I can without risking that outcome.

{Editing Note: Everything after this needs strict review, and not just from me. Get as many eyes as possible on this before publishing.}

Nearly every ghoul has or will participate in the direct acquisition of flesh at some point. Finding food is an involved process, and not a particularly scaleable one. There are no factory farms for humans, nor should there be. Truly steady supplies of flesh are rare. Most of our methods involve gathering a small group of ghouls periodically, rather than just one or two of us working continuously. This, unfortunately, causes inconsistencies in supply more often than is comfortable. As such, we’ve had ample opportunity to figure out exactly how much flesh we need to survive.

For the average mature ghoul, 5 pounds of flesh per day is the ideal consumption rate. Very roughly, we should be eating one adult human body per month for peak health. Put that starkly, it’s a grim picture. Extrapolate from that, and that means each of us is eating 12 humans a year. Obviously, we don’t eat that much from the moment of birth. I remember starting to get hungry more often around age 15, and I can count on one hand the number of ghouls I’ve met over 50, so let’s call the 35 years between those two ages our lifespan. Over the course of our lives, we will each eat over 400 humans. When you look at it from that angle, one life against 400, it’s no wonder that you have, as a whole, decided that we need to die.

But that angle misses some important subtleties. For one, we can handle some remarkably flexible feeding patterns. We can subsist on much less than an ideal diet for a very long time without serious ill effects. For example, I follow a fairly common feeding pattern and only eat half-meals three weeks out of every four. The only ill effects I notice are increased exhaustion and soreness, usually beginning towards the end of the second week and gradually escalating until the fourth. We can also go for multiple days without eating before noticing any ill effects. Many ghouls have only one or two very large meals each week. I personally prefer to have smaller meals more consistently - it makes me feel more human - but it’s a pattern I’ve followed plenty of times when flesh is scarce.

The other main subtlety that the math I presented above misses is that, often, we do not have to kill for flesh. People die all the time from causes that have nothing to do with us, and rarely in ways that make their flesh inedible. We have hardy constitutions and strong stomachs - most diseases and toxic chemicals can be processed and rendered inert in our digestive tracts. There are nearly three million deaths every year in the U.S. alone, the vast majority of which have nothing to do with us. If we could utilize all of that flesh, we could comfortably feed 250,000 ghouls without harming a single person. Obviously that’s never going to happen, but I also doubt there are that many ghouls in the country, so… Suffice to say that there is, theoretically, more than enough ethically-sourced flesh to go around.

Utilizing that flesh, however, is a significant logistical challenge. People aren’t in the habit of donating their bodies for our dining pleasure, and people tend to take the security of their loved ones’ remains pretty seriously. Taking flesh by force, even when we’re not trying to part it from a living body, is difficult, dangerous, messy work, so we prefer to sidestep that wherever possible. This brings us nicely to the first of our three main strategies: farming.

Farming is, unfortunately, our least productive method, but it’s the one that I hope we’ll be able to rely on entirely, some nebulous day in the future. Farming is the practice of discreetly smuggling dead flesh, produced by natural causes, out of the facilities where it is held. This is the only method we use that is sustainable, in the sense that it requires one or two ghouls working constantly and delivering a steady supply, rather than the periodic group efforts I described earlier. This method is also unusual in that it depends on us being integrated in human society, integrated enough to have unsupervised access to dead flesh.

There are two primary sources that we farm. First, there are hospitals. Countless surgical procedures result in the separation of flesh from living humans. Sometimes this flesh is passed along for scientific analysis, but most of it ends up classified as medical waste sooner rather than later. As I’ve said, though, we can safely handle most of the factors that cause limbs to be amputated or organs to be removed. Once these have been marked for disposal, ghouls working at the hospital can usually hide away the flesh for later retrieval without anyone noticing its absence. Unfortunately, caution requires our farmers to take less than is truly salvageable, given how damning it is to be caught stealing flesh. They also avoid taking whole cadavers, which are much more closely observed while in the hospital, and are typically handed over to other people rather than fully disposed of. We also, as a general rule, are careful to avoid eating anything cancerous. Tumors are something of a taboo, only to be eaten in times of extreme famine. We are as vulnerable to cancer as humans are, and there is a strong fear that eating tumors may cause you to absorb some of the cancerous cells into your own body, where they will be free to grow again. I can’t speak to the truth of that, but it’s not a fate I’m interested in tempting.

Our other main farming source is funeral homes. Contrary to popular perception, and to government defence policies, we actually have very little interest in robbing graveyards. By the time bodies go in the ground, they’ve usually been rendered inedible by embalming practices. Given how robust our digestive tracts are, it’s my theory that embalming practices were, at some point in history, specifically designed to protect human bodies from us. Obviously not all bodies are properly embalmed, but there’s no way to tell that without digging one up, and digging up a grave is hard. It is far more beneficial for us to intercept the bodies before they get to that stage. Therefore, we find it very valuable to train as morticians. This allows us to take cuts of flesh before a body is embalmed. Over the years, we’ve figured out exactly how much flesh can be taken and from where without showing at an open casket funeral. For closed caskets, or for cremations, we can take nearly the entire body without detection.

{Editing Note: That’s going to be upsetting for anyone who’s ever buried a family member. I’m not sure how to address that gently. I don’t know how receptive most people would be to “it’s okay that we ate your grandma because it means we got to live long enough to eat other people’s grandmas”.}

Unfortunately, there are a limited number of jobs with access to farmable bodies, and as the number of ghouls in those positions increase, so does the chance of one of them being discovered. Some of you, I’m sure, have seen how paranoid everyone gets when one of us is outed among you. We can’t even come close to fully utilizing these outlets without risking a lot of us dying. My household is fortunate - three of our members are farmers, and we may be gaining a fourth, depending on what degree Scarlet actually settles on. But that supply of farmed flesh is not always enough to feed all of us, and it certainly isn’t enough for Yaga’s charity projects. So about once a month, we send out a group to engage in our second method - gathering.

As I said, there are a lot of deaths that have nothing to do with us. Gathering is our attempt to get ahold of some of those dead before other factors take care of them. Death is, unfortunately, unpredictable, so the best we can do is send people out at irregular intervals to scoop up what we can. A gathering party typically consists of at least half a dozen ghouls; the exact size depends on the amount of ground we want to cover, how many bodies we expect to be transporting, and how worried we are about getting into a violent confrontation. Ideally, no one gets hurt by our gathering parties, but no one is going to look too kindly on body snatching, and sometimes we just attract the wrong kind of attention. If we need an especially large group, or if we intend to cover a particularly large area, we might even reach out to other households for extra help in exchange for a share of our find.

A gathering run typically begins at night, in the poorer parts of the city. I’m sure gathering happens in rural areas, but I can’t speak to their methods. In the city, though, it’s the poor and the homeless and the addicts, the abandoned of human society that are most likely to die somewhere we can get to them. So we put on anonymizing clothing and start looking. Our most reliable leads come from homeless communities and drug sites. Sometimes it’s enough to just show up, make small talk, and look around for the dead or imminently dying. If it’s the latter, sometimes we just wait - keep them company while they wait for the end. Unfortunately for us, people don’t generally die all at once at predictable intervals; it’s not uncommon for us to find no bodies at all. Fortunately, there are some people who are desperate enough to sell us leads. Buying leads is a dangerous game - any person who knows us to be ghouls, even if we take pains to conceal our identities from them, is one more person who could bring the exterminators down on us - and the more effective the method of gathering leads is, the more dangerous it is. The safest thing is to find a stranger and offer them money for a lead, one time deal, and never contact them again. Regular contacts have more opportunities to expose us, whether for exterminator money, moral duty, or just by being careless, but if they know to expect us, they can amass leads, or sometimes even hold bodies for us to buy off them directly. I’ve heard that some households even have arrangements with organized crime to act as free, efficient body disposal.

Once we’ve thoroughly checked these areas, the next step is to check accident sites. Typically we’ll separate to stake out common suicide and accident sites. These aren’t particularly reliable either, but they turn up bodies often enough to be worth staking out once we’ve exhausted our more proactive options. Sometimes, on particularly slow gathering parties, we’ll break out a police scanner and listen for any incident reports likely to produce a body and see if we can get there before the cops. It’s a dangerous game, and often no more lucrative than our other approaches, but there is nothing more depressing or upsetting than coming back from gathering empty handed. Coming home empty handed means we need to take more drastic measures.

I’ve been on around a dozen gathering parties so far. Most of them went well enough, with minimal incident and moderate success. I’ve been on two where we had to chase police scanners. And I’ve been on one that came back empty-handed. That isn’t the only one my household has ever run that came back empty-handed, but it’s the one that stuck out most in my mind because it’s the one time I felt personally responsible for what happened next. When our regular gathering still doesn’t produce enough flesh, we have three options, none of them pleasant. We could all tighten our belts, ration our flesh carefully, and try to endure until we can make up our shortfall. There are a lot of factors that can make this approach unsafe, though. Starving isn’t any more pleasant for us than it is for humans, and it can make us less careful than is safe. Or sometimes someone is injured or sick and wouldn’t be able to handle stricter rationing. Our next option is to organize a gathering raid. There are plenty of hospitals and funeral homes that we can’t farm, for one reason or another, but sometimes we can steal from them. This is a high-risk endeavor, obviously. Anywhere that handles human remains is on the lookout for this kind of thing, and even if we get away clean, the raid will almost certainly make the news and bring exterminators sniffing around. That’s not even touching the fact that, just because we aren’t farming somewhere, that doesn’t mean someone else isn’t. The kind of scrutiny a raid draws can be a death sentence for any ghouls working at the raid target. So, most of the time, Yaga chooses to take our third option. She calls for a Hunt.

{Editing Note: I need to talk to Spatha before I write the rest of this. I need to convince her that I’ll just listen this time, and then I need to actually do that. I don’t know if I can do it. I don’t want to reopen this wound between us. I don’t want to risk our friendship. Is this project really worth that? Do I seriously think it will make a difference?}

#my writing #memoirs of a flesh eater #original fiction #not tlt

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barschter000 · 3 years

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OWOWOW MY FANGAN

THANK YOU SO MUCH AT EVERYONE WHO IS INTERESTED IN THIS SERIOUSLY YOU CAN'T BELIEVE HOW HAPPY THAT MAKES ME MY HANDS ARE SHAKING (that's also why it took so long to post this akhdjwjs)

Baiko Omori – Ultimate Lucky Student

"My name is Baiko Omori, I am here as the Ultimate Lucky Student. The pleasure of meeting you is mine, my dear friends! There are actually quite many things that I'm talented at and hopefully, this academy helps me find my 'true Ultimate.'"

Birthday: March 11th (Pisces)

Blood Type: A+

Height: 165cm / 5'4”

Weight: 67kg / 148lbs

Likes: vintage 50s music, street food, grocery shopping

Dislikes: cockroaches, the smell of gasoline, betrayal

Baiko never means harm as he values life over everything else. He is friendly and considerate, always smiling. He offers help where he can, sometimes coming off as intrusive but never does something that would put him at a disadvantage. He has the habit of calling everyone his “dear friend” and is in general, quirky and a little detached from normality. When you're around him, you can't help but feel like there's something off but Baiko is too nice for you to bring that up.

Ei Hagakure – Ultimate Ghost Whisperer

"Name's Ei Hagakure, Ghost Whisperer. Sup? My gramps went to this school back in his days. Sadly didn't inherit his spiritual powers, so guess I'll substitute with a bit of science."

Birthday: April 29th (Taurus)

Blood Type: B+

Height: 177cm / 5'8”

Weight: 57kg / 126lbs

Likes: bad television shows, abandoned buildings, the pizza they have on Wednesday at her university's cafeteria

Dislikes: family fights, doctor's appointments, olives

Ei is a laid-back young scientist that leaves the world of academics in wonder at her more or less successful inventions. Her greatest goal is to prove the existence of ghosts based on scientific findings. Despite Ei's grand ambitions, she is relaxed and calm and just weird enough to get along with almost everybody.

Hideaki Yukiyama – Ultimate Mathematician

"Yukiyama Hideaki, Hideaki Yukiyama, Mathematician and the Ultimate at that! This class looks pretty alright so far. You shitwits seem like the type a smart boy like me can have fun with, hehe."

Birthday: May 2nd (Taurus)

Blood Type: 0+

Height: 156cm / 5'1”

Weight: 62kg / 137lbs

Likes: the feeling of chalk, messy notes, his own laugh

Dislikes: boredom, sitting straight, school uniforms

Contrary to what his talent might lead you to believe, Hideaki is actually a brat. Constantly in the search for mischief and entertainment, he likes to ridicule and annoy others. His genius lies hidden in his complicated speech and spectacular knowledge that he uses to confuse the people around him. All negativity and criticism towards his character simply bounces off him. It is not easy to befriend him as he believes that friends hinder him but deep down, he wishes for someone to get through his irritating personality to know him better.

Ichini – Ultimate Robotics Engineer

"My model's name is 1.2, that's Ichini for you. Ultimate Robotics Engineer. Be prepared to have that weirded-out look wiped off your faces, meatbags! Someday I'll drown this world in chaos and rule humanity with my machines!"

Birthday: August 13th (Leo)

Blood Type: 0-

Height: 210cm / 6'8”

Weight: 132kg / 291lbs

Likes: the smell of electricity, children's' shows, energy drinks

Dislikes: being photographed, asparagus, humanity

Ichini is a mean cyborg that has rejected humanity and all its aspects. Xe thinks xemself superior to everyone around xem because they are still human and will not survive the overthrow of the machines that xe is planning. Despite xir large, armed metal body though, Ichini is all bark, no bite and wishes to be more courageous and confident in xir choices.

Jun Nagao – Ultimate Escapologist

"My name is Jun Nagao, I'm the Ultimate Escapologist. There's nothing much about me, really. Sorry."

Birthday: September 25th (Libra)

Blood Type: AB-

Height: 171cm / 5'6”

Weight: 63kg / 139lbs

Likes: flower bouquets, art from the Romantic era, freshly laundered clothes

Dislikes: skin tight clothing, reading out loud, overcrowded subways

After his face was paralysed in a kidnapping incident, Jun has adopted the perception of him being emotionless and cold. As he usually dismisses others and their feelings, Jun is a loner. Because his talent stems from his continued abductions, he finds it distressing to be enrolled at Hope's Peak Academy but accepts his fate to ensure his own safety.

Kaida Tsutsumi – Ultimate Stock Broker

”Kaida Tsutsumi... Ultimate Stock Broker... That is all.”

Birthday: January 9th (Capricorn)

Blood Type: AB-

Chest: 82cm / 32”

Height: 153cm / 5'0”

Weight: 58kg / 128bs

Likes: coffee, Paganini, listening to the rain while falling asleep

Dislikes: the cold, bitter coffee, wool sweaters

Kaida is a small and timid girl, so shy that it is hard to imagine that she works at the stock market. Kaida is great with numbers and probabilities and rather spends time with diagrams and prices than with people. She only speaks as much as necessary and gives her answers clear and direct. Because of her reluctance to talk about herself, she is mostly seen alone but will get extremely attached to you the moment you show that you acknowledge her. It feels like she holds a secret that she can't reveal.

Kyo Kido – Ultimate Horror Author

"My name's Kyo. Uh, Kyo Kido, that's probably how you know me. I'm the Ultimate Horror Author? I'd offer to give out some autographs but my hands are kinda shaking right now cuz– Wow– Hope's Peak, y'know! So it's gonna look kinda ugly, ahah."

Birthday: November 21st (Scorpio)

Blood Type: 0+

Height: 180cm / 5’9”

Weight: 79kg / 174lbs

Likes: romance novels, romantic comedies, the clacking sound of typewriters

Dislikes: ink stains on his hand, sharp pencils, soup

Kyo is really just a normal teenager with a knack for writing; at least, that's what he believes. Like every other teenager, he is a little awkward and shy and, in contrast to his talent, not at all scary. However, Kyo's books manage to evoke such terror in his readership that it's dubbed and loved as 'Kido's curse'. Kyo is flattered but honestly can't handle the fame.

Maxis von Läuterbach – Ultimate Knight

"My name is Maxis von Läuterbach, wielding the title of the Ultimate Knight. It is not often that you see someone as wondrous as me, so my lieges, I am ever at your service."

Birthday: June 21st (Gemini)

Blood Type: AB-

Height: 182cm / 5'9"

Weight: 75kg / 165lbs

Likes: stained glass windows, historic castles, Belgian pralines

Dislikes: blisters, ignorance, ill-behaved children

Growing up surrounded by ruins of glorious pasts and with the wish to set themself off from their peers, Maxis chose to walk the path backwards and do everything in their power to become a historically accurate knight. Unfortunately, Maxis had miscalculated and noticed that a knight lives to serve, not to be served but there is no turning back now.

Shiori Ishimaru-Owada – Ultimate Team Captain

"I'm Shiori Ishimaru-Owada, proudly bearing the title of the Ultimate Team Captain! I'm excited to get along with y'all! Honestly, I don't really know why I'm at this academy, but as long as I make my Dads proud, I'm probably doing the right thing!"

Birthday: December 14th (Sagittarius)

Blood Type: AB+

Height: 185cm / 6'0”

Weight: 79kg / 174lbs:

Likes: racing games, exercise, cooking

Dislikes: reading, hospital stays, basements

Shiori is an intense and upbeat girl. She is a capable leader with strong beliefs that she defends well and at times, imposes on others without noticing. While not being truly talented at a singular sport, she has tried out many things and has always effortlessly attracted a group of allies around her, no matter where she went. She is kind and motivational and, strange for a teenage girl, very attached to her parents.

Tamae Shiroma – Ultimate Whistleblower

"I'm Tamae Shiroma, Ultimate Whistleblower. Pleasure. Before I get any complaints later: Know who you're talking to, alright?"

Birthday: May 21st (Gemini)

Blood Type: B+

Height: 159cm / 5'2”

Weight: 73kg / 161lbs

Likes: hot baths, spicy food, her sister

Dislikes: reality TV, sugary food, caterpillars

Famous for her small but well-placed leaks, Tamae is the tiny thorn in the side of many politicians. In the shithole that she considers the world, Tamae tries to find the truth as painful as it may be to some. She is wary and never fully trusts anyone, knowing that how dirty people play for their achievements. While talking to her, it always seems like she knows more than you've told her. That is probably true. At the cost of her anonymity, she is attending Hope's Peak where she is promised security. Her talent is her duty, whether she is happy with it or not.

Etsuya Iwata – Ultimate Opera Singer

"My name is but fleeting. A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, a song of any other melody would sound as fine. For now, call me Etsuya Iwata, forever I am the Ultimate Opera Singer. Allow me to bring pleasure to your ears, my darlings!"

Birthday: July 9th (Cancer)

Blood Type: B-

Height: 174cm / 5'7”

Weight: 65kg / 143lbs

Likes: being on stage, tea, sightseeing

Dislikes: having to keep secrets, incompetence, boring drama

Etsuya is a charming lad that likes to bathe in the spotlight. He comes from renowned music schools and stages and he is aware the extend of his talent such as his vocal range, performance abilities, musical expertise or the languages he is fluent in. However, Etsuya is not arrogant, he rather aims to make people happy with his performances. It's easy to fall for his appeal and compliments but it's just as easy to notice that he is moody and picky and overall dramatic, and terrible at lying.

Rokuro Nakatani - Ultimate Fraud

"Rokuro Nakatani, sixth son of my generation. This school calls me the Ultimate Fraud yet there's no actual evidence for this claim. I fear they might have given me that title based on my sisters who were arrested for theft and forgery. Well, these are only two of my eight siblings, black sheeps aren't uncommon, right?"

Birthday: April 14th (Aries)

Height: 167cm / 5'6"

Weight: 66kg / 146lbs

Likes: lucky charms, rabbits, looking stylish

Dislikes: noisy places, manual labor, seaweed

Rokuro comes from a family of forgers and grew up in criminal ranks with limited contact to a normal life. He is used to being assessed and given a value and, just like everyone else in his clan, is a perfectionist through and through. His talent, artistic skills and his eye for detail all came naturally to him without much effort. Rokuro is the poster child of his family, earning him prestige and confidence but also pressure and envy from his parents and siblings. Towards others, he is condescending and belittling. Despite his standing in the Nakatani family and with his crafting abilities at hand, Rokuro often wonders if there is a way for him to create something original.

Miyoko Iwata – Ultimate DJ

"Miyoko Iwata, Ultimate DJ! The lil' hodgepodge I'm wearin' on my face isn't actually a laser or sumthin', it just helps me see. So no worries, I don't bite! Or at least, not that often."

Birthday: July 9th (Cancer)

Blood Type: B+

Height: 172cm / 5'6"

Weight: 68kg / 152lbs

Likes: bass, crowds, playing violin

Dislikes: the quiet, being lonely, salty instant meals

Miyoko is a young music producer that is known for her remixes and features and grew her large international fanbase through social media. With how many experiences she has made in so little time, she has matured quickly and developed a sort of maternal protection over those she holds dear. However, that protection often slips into violence. Miyoko lashes out and threatens people, sometimes pulling the knife she carries on her. There seems to be something hidden underneath her visor and neon clothes that Miyoko doesn't wish to talk about. She says that she is looking for something.

#fanganronpa #fangan #fangan oc

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sourwormsaresour · 3 years

Note

what are your thoughts on La Squadra's sexualities?

First off, Happy Pride Month! Please have a safe one. Before I start, I just want to let you guys know that I’m a straight cisgender woman so I’m not 100% knowledgeable on sexualities so these are based on my current knowledge of the community. I’m open to all head-canons about La Squadra’s sexualities besides my own :)

Sorbet and Gelato are gay, both using he/him pronouns, and are the most out compared to everyone in the team. Even though La Squadra knew about their relationships, the two themselves aren’t open about it outside of the team and their families. This is especially because relationships can be used against you in the crime world but also because their families rely on them to have a “good reputation” to live comfortably. I head-canon that they are both breadwinners of their families: Gelato has siblings that go to very conservative, academic institutions and rely on scholarships that look into family history for recommendations, and Sorbet’s mother requires medical attention from reputable doctors that also have homophobic biases that can be used against her. They’ve secretly used some of their money to help a street kid or two that they learned was disowned after being outed or assassinated a few people for hurting kids for being part of the LGBTQ+ community or even preying on them. The two men probably both went through phases where they thought they only liked women, tried to be in heterosexual relationships, and their enemies-to-lovers type of relationship had probably stemmed from their inability to properly process their attraction to each other at the time.

Formaggio is bisexual and prefers using he/him pronouns; he has a stronger attraction to women but is unaware that he’s attracted to men as well. A big part of why he’s so unaware or in denial of it came from his conservative upbringing in a working-class family and lack of representation growing up. Formaggio knew that men can be attracted to other men, but other aspects of the LGBTQ+ community is either unknown to him or seen in a negative perception; he’s learning more about the community and how to be a better ally, especially after meeting Sorbet and Gelato, but he’s still struggling to reverse the anti-LGBTQ+ sentiments he grew up believing. As a result of his past, Formaggio assumed that one can only be attracted to one gender and never crossed his mind that people can be attracted to more than one. He often tries to hide his attraction to men via “straight guy who’s unaware he’s gay occasionally spits homophobic jokes and says ‘no homo’ every time he says "I love you" to his friends but he means full homo” approach.

Illuso is pansexual and gender fluid, preferring he/him/they/them pronouns most of the time but also likes using neo-pronouns and occasionally prefers to use she/her pronouns. As a former intern for a fashion designer before he joined La Squadra, he’s relatively more exposed to meeting different people in the LGBTQ+ community through fashion; those who were higher in status and power would be more out about it than those in lower ranking and the community was a huge source for avant-garde, counter-culture influences. Despite getting more inspiration for his designs from his interactions and developing his identity in the LGBTQ+ space, that also led to him witnessing discrimination, abuse, and powerplay caused by the higher-ups; some became victims simply because of rumors that they may be part of the LGBTQ+ community or being forcibly outed, some are forced into relationships in exchange for opportunities and privileges, etc. He remains closeted and part of his arrogance stems from him hiding his sexuality due to the trauma of enduring the abuse and witnessing it as well. La Squadra doesn’t know his sexuality or know that he’s genderfluid, but they’re fine with adapting to his pronouns whenever they change.

Pesci is unaware that they’re gay and are non-binary that prefers they/them pronouns. Although they try to stick to he/him pronouns to avoid being out, they like using they/them more and get secretly happy when someone refers to them as such. I head-canon that they’re actually younger than Giorno when they encountered Team Bucciarati, which would explain why he never killed anyone up until this point (they’re a literal kid that’s slowly getting involved in the team when Sorbet and Gelato were killed, albeit they’re on the buffer side despite their age), and with their sheltered childhood and Prosciutto’s strict mentorship, they never got to sit down and think about their sexual and gender identity. They often try to pretend they’re a macho straight man alongside Formaggio but they end up feeling bad about it after trying to say a bad comment or joke to fit in. Pesci themselves feel like they’re alone in terms of the emotions of not being able to put your sexuality into words. It doesn’t help that they’re rather isolated compared to everyone except Risotto; they only knew La Squadra as their family ever since they joined the team and they never talk to anyone outside of the group.

Prosciutto is bisexual and genderfluid, preferring to identify with he/him pronouns, but he’s also the most closeted and probably has the most internalized homophobia as well. Growing up in the entertainment industry, especially in acting, means adhering to heteronormative standards; controversies of any kind would make or break a career and he constantly heard homophobic statements “disguised” as critiques around him from all levels of the entertainment industry. The fact that he was overworked up until his “career retirement” also didn’t give him the time to sit down and realize both his sexuality and how fucked up the film industry is in terms of its treatment towards the LGBTQ+ community. With his upbringing of being presentable and hiding his sexuality, he tries to present himself in the most Italian metrosexual straight machismo man he could and uses his “gentleman charms” towards women to avoid people from questioning further about his sexuality. But at the end of the day, he knows he’s lying to himself about his sexuality. And unfortunately, his anger at being unable to express that is often misdirected.

Melone is demi-sexual, though he presents himself as asexual and panromantic, and prefers using any pronouns. Like his teammates, he prefers using he/him for his safety. As a former scientist, he learned and got to know about the LGBTQ+ community through a more scientific perspective, but also knew there are hidden homophobic biases in the science community as well. Still, he does his best to be an ally for his peers before realizing he is demisexual and panromantic. His sexuality allows him to view the incubation and child-rearing aspect of his Stand without emotions or feelings involved and further explains how he views fornication and training his Juniors in a very scientific and analytical way without guilt taking over. Despite presenting himself as ace/straight (mostly for safety and because it’s easier to explain that he has no attraction to people than being a demisexual), I also see someone who yearns to have a strong emotional connection to someone and would give his all to the person he loves most. His overtly sexual nature is more of an act (I've heard that some aces tend to act overtly sexual, either to avoid being outed or as a result of growing up thinking that need to feel an attraction is necessary) and Melone secretly desires being attracted to someone he learns to trust, admire, and love over time. I have a backstory that plays into that but I might disclose it another time. ;)

Ghiaccio is on the same boat with Prosciutto in terms of having internalized homophobia due to his childhood career as a child athlete. At the time he was training to be an Olympic hopeful as a solo figure skater, Ghiaccio was born female and had to remain in the closet due to the conservative nature of the ice skating world and his step-father being notorious for his opinions favoring homophobia and sexism. Once he joined La Squadra, Ghiaccio began experimenting with himself and ultimately came out as transgender, presenting himself with he/him pronouns, and had been using testosterone ever since. Most members that joined after him only knew Ghiaccio as male while the other members are either indifferent about his gender or are involved in helping Ghiaccio transition to be male. Transitioning also helped him realized he was aromantic and gay, which provided him closure from the years of struggle he had trying to fit into the heteronormative expectations he thought he had to conform to when he was female. The effect of testosterone also explains his brash and short-tempered nature, although that stems more from him finally being able to express himself after years of repressing his emotions as a child.

Risotto is also aromantic and asexual, preferring he/him/they/them pronouns, although he doesn’t know that he is aro/ace, to begin with. Growing up, he never really cared when he heard his older relatives or adults making comments about how “he’d make a good husband” or “have the girls chase him”, because all he cared about was his family and friends. He just assumes that once he becomes a “big boy”, then he’ll have thoughts of wanting to get married like the fairytales say. Just let his future spouse have children with him in any way and he'll play the role of husband regardless. Since his cousin’s death, he gave up the idea of having any sexual or romantic interest in anyone. Why to go out of your way to find any relationship when they’ll be dead soon enough- that was Risotto’s logic. He’s not aware that he can define himself as aro/ace, he just assumes that the trauma he went through with his cousin’s death stops him from feeling any attraction and doesn’t make an effort to figure out why.

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thelovelyghostwriter · 3 years

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KuraNeon and Cognitive Dissonance Theory

Someone: “Eww you like KuraNeon? But doesn’t he not like her because she’s a flesh collector?”

Me:

Okay, first off, Kurapika doesn’t necessarily hate Neon. I honestly can’t recall anywhere in hunter x hunter where he criticizes Neon’s attitude or her hobby in thoughts or voicing it out. Yes, he did display a strong prejudice on flesh collectors and vows to arrest them; Melody also rephrased it and said that he’d kill Neon if he has to. However, there was literally no indication of Kurapika being annoyed with Neon even. In fact, he was so surprised to see the flesh collector, his boss, being a young girl (as I am too). I’d say it completely destroys his initial expectation/imagery of what a flesh collector should be.

Secondly, let’s just say... it’s hella saucy if Kurapika starts liking Neon.

Imagine the MENTAL STRAIN Kurapika has if he ever finds himself liking a flesh collector aka Neon. Can you imagine the cognitive dissonance he has? HUGE bruh.

Source: https://elearningindustry.com/apply-cognitive-dissonance-theory-elearning

Okay, just a layman explanation of Cognitive Dissonance Theory: It’s when a person’s beliefs has been inconsistent with his/her actions. They feel cognitive dissonance because there has been a discrepancy between what they know and what they are doing.

There are three ways a person can resolve cognitive dissonance:

1) Change Belief

2) Change Action

3) Change Action Perception

Now, let’s apply it to Kurapika liking/lusting after Neon. He can either:

1) Change belief - which is about his prejudice on flesh collectors. This will likely not happen because flesh collectors are indirectly the cause of his clan’s demise.

2) Change action - stop liking/lusting for Neon. This is possible but when you’re around someone and you have to guard them for 24/7; it’s going to be very difficult.

3) Change action perception - think of Neon as more than just a flesh collector. This is likely what will happen. Kurapika is smart enough to realise that Neon is a girl who has had poor upbringing by her dad and had been exploited for power gain among the mafia.

HOW INTERESTING OF USING THEORIES FOR YOUR ANIME SHIPS HAHAH. I love this ship because it opens up to this possibility and potential conflict; and it’s even indicated in Cognitive Dissonance Theory.

Call me nuts, but I guess I like using psychology theories to help me build up concepts of pairings because these theories have been studied in actual human behaviours. You can say it’s “impossible” because she’s a “flesh collector”, but it really isn’t. According to Cognitive Dissonance Theory, it can happen with some mental adjustments.

Of course, I’m not stating that it’s canon or anything, all I’m saying is that it’s not 100% impossible in terms of HUMAN BEHAVIOUR and this conflict makes the concept of KuraNeon really interesting for me, rather than some boring-ass vanilla ships.

I think there are other ships that falls into this same vein (e.g. Chrollo/Kurapika, Ging/Pariston, Cheadle/Pariston) but I guess KuraNeon is more of a clear cut because of her diva attitude and Kurapika’s affiliation with the Nostrade Family.

He’s the Nostrade Family Young Boss now because he’s married to Neon.

Now, you’re all wondering, Kurapika can’t possibly like Neon because they are totally opposite or assuming that “she isn’t his type”. How are we supposed to know what type of person Kurapika likes? Just because a person is very opposite to someone, it does not necessarily mean that they aren’t his/her type (I’d try to get some scientific stuff on opposites attract later on).

Also, if you haven’t noticed, Kurapika became close friends with Melody, Leorio and Gon - people who are the complete opposite of him. Arguably, I’d say Killua is the most similar to him and yet they are not as close as he would be to Melody or Leorio. In fact, he seems to be get attached to people even if he doesn’t want to or he’s annoyed with them at first, as evident by the way he got angry at Uvogin when he heard that the Phantom Troupe killed his co-workers, when initially he did not want to get close to anyone.

People say he’s cold, but I’d argue that he does get attached, but tries to separate himself from people. He’s not avoidant-dismissive attachment style, he has avoidant-fearful attachment style. In fact, Neon is actually more of the avoidant-dismissive attachment style, meaning that she’s less likely to get attached to anyone more than him. I’d talk about Attachment Style Theory in another day.

Regardless, sometimes when it comes to shipping, you just need a bit of imagination.

I truly don’t get why people would want to diss on another’s ships and state that it’s a crack-pairing and it isn’t canon. In fact, in Hunter x Hunter, almost none of the pairings are canon! Even if they have a lot of interactions, there’s hardly any concrete indication that they are canon or they are implied ever so faintly.

I think so long as you can make a pairing work in fanfics/fanarts and have your own concept while using their canon personality, anything’s possible.

For me, KuraNeon and the concept of Cognitive Dissonance is my jam and motivations for liking this ship.

Also, in mobile games:

Not really entirely a crackpairing tbh.

#kuraneo #kuraneon

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lumberpond34 · 3 years

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Laser Teeth Whitening Review.

Content

Teeth Whitening In Beckenham, Kent

What Are The Benefits Of Whitening At The Method?

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lawofattraction112 · 4 years

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Regulation of Attraction : Cooperative Reality

the law of attraction There is an enormous amount of dialogue lately about the Legislation of Attraction, you may say that the Legal requirements of Attraction comes with gained celebrity condition as the personal progress tool of the minute, the current popular means for manifesting your aspirations. What most people don't understand is that the Laws of Attraction is not really a new idea, in truth it's not even a past idea in the sensation that there has been a point in time as soon as somebody coined that phrase and abruptly everyone began deploying it like some innovative appliance. Someone not surprisingly did invent this phrase Law with Attraction, but in the identical way that Mister Isaac Newton devised the word gravity. Regulations of Attraction enjoy gravity, just is usually, no one owns your rights to it, plus its impossible to avoid utilizing it. the law of attraction The Law of Selling point is one of many legislation by which mankind may be operating consciously and unconsciously since the start of time. Most people are blissfully unaware of precisely how these laws have an impact on their lives together with equally unaware that power of these legal guidelines can be gathered and used to terrific effect on a daily rationale.

Since the release in the movie The Secret, regulations of Attraction provides come to the attention in peoples heads as the ultimate product for changing your daily routine and that is a good thing. As i find however that a lot of people after viewing and reading information regarding the Law of Attractive force are still somewhat lost as to how the idea actually works. There is a number of talk about holding graphics in the mind, delivering thought vibrations available to the universe, having a state of requirement and gratitude, and additionally waiting for the galaxy to respond by way of the Law of Drawing card and provide that with which you have focussed ones intention, and so on. These things are very delightful and I have found these useful in my own personal learning, but non-e of these ideas available me with really satisfactory answers precisely how the Law of Destination actually works, both spiritually and scientifically.

Today if you're anything such as me, blind confidence just doesn't slice it, most people just like at least to have an decent explanation for why jointly get involved with the Law involving Attraction, otherwise people tend to reject the main idea outright, which will be a unfortunate really.

Vital Knowledge

The difficulty that I think a lot of people have is they will hear about unbelievable success stories relating to the Law of Selling point, amazing tales of folks that have gone with having an average types of existence to experiencing a life that a lot of people only dream of, and then set out with good faith to obtain similar results. Undoubtedly not everyone defines the results they had expected, why is this? Maintain a pool of Law of Attractive force failed? Are all associated with the success reviews bogus? Are people just clever ploys to get us to own books and flicks about how to use what the law states of Attraction?

There are plenty of individual claims regarding the Law of Drawing card bringing great wealth and the fulfillment from great dreams, in addition to there are also charlatans holdings and liabilities area of life, strict, secular, scientific, but it surely would be a great misstep to reject a notion of such probable because of a few people, you might as well give up all personal advancement right now.

As for the primary idea that the Law with Attraction has by some means failed to work, mine experience tells me that the is simply not possible, legal issues of Attraction is absolutely not a business approach, or a clever program that is subject to marketplaces or the moods of individuals, it is since constant and foreseeable as the sun increase, all that is required is a appropriate level of recognizing in order to leverage it's potential.

This I do believe is where a great number of confusion exists, how come do some people are generally able to apply legislation of Attraction using great affect whilst others struggle to see the littlest things manifest? The result is knowledge, you will find there's basic lack of realizing about how the Law involving Attraction works. A lot of people however seem to be capable to easily apply regulations of Attraction and find results even though they also have no more knowledge of precisely what is actually happening ın comparison to the next person, how come this? It is because a lot of people have a mental pre-disposition to accepting what the law states of Attraction, her requirements and effects without question, some others don't and involve further instruction concerning fundamentals of the regulation of attraction in advance of being able to apply independently properly.

Its a tad like being offered a kit to get a model aeroplane without worrying about the assembly instructions, most people may have a natural comprehending about how to assemble items, they may have seen their father putting together model aeroplanes in earlier times, but for others it's going to an almost impossible process, time consuming and irritating.

It is my encounter that with a fundamental increase in knowledge about the Law associated with Attraction and the fundamental principles that control it, any individual start to see real ends in every area of their lifetime almost immediately. Which means that let's now check it out at some of that will useful knowledge that will aid us in increasing a better understanding of ways to apply the Law from Attraction to excellent affect.

The Most Important Thing

The very first thing that I would like to claim is that the Regulation of Attraction is simply not the most powerful legislation in the universe, not like popular opinion, web site of underlying basics that govern that the Law of Destination works, and that is the place we shall get started.

I want to start by creating this statement; when we use a Law of Selling point, we do not get things! this is additionally contrary to popular viewpoint. There is not a racecar with your vibration on it waiting for want you to believe that it's your own property before it appears inside driveway. This may sound a ridiculous proclamation, but there are many coaches of the Law with Attraction that condition exactly that, it can be about manifesting elements, well it's not.

What the law states of Attraction can not work by you applying out a imagined vibration to the world and somehow a universe, through the process of the Law involving Attraction, responds compared to that thought by giving you the thing that suits that vibration, nevertheless unfortunately this is what is actually taught. Some people just accept this examination and get on by means of using the Law associated with Attraction to superb success, you could telephone that blind hope, and I have no issue with that at all, nevertheless it won't work for absolutely everyone, and that does issue me because it can perform for everyone.

The most important thing you certainly will ever understand for the Law of Attractive force is that that always involves some others, other minds, many other realities, not important things. I call the following underlying principle Cooperative Reality and examine it in detail across my book.

To put it differently, Cooperative Reality advises that in order to employ the Law of Drawing card you require the synergy of other people realities. Understanding that concept has been that single greatest help my own personal increase, when I came to this approach realization it altogether revolutionized my practical experience in using the Legislation of Attraction. The idea provided me along with meaningful direction with the application of all the options I was ignorantly using to apply legal issues of Attraction.

I have already been asked many times to describe my success within using the Law from Attraction, and My partner and i discover that it's not straightforward to summarise the concept of Cooperative Reality, and that is so why I decided to generate my book worthy Law of Destination - Cooperative Truth of the matter. I will however make an attempt to summarise the booklet in order to give you at the least some idea of the strength of this concept with regards to the Law of Selling point. I must state nevertheless that there will be ideas that may seem really unusual, but We assure you there does exist solid scientific signs for everything My organization is putting forward, ever again, explained in detail all over my book.

That Quantum Field

For a start we need to ask this question "what is normally reality? " along with I will begin by using a brief look at a perception within Quantum Physics called super job. Briefly stated tremendous position is mentioning sub atomic dirt appearing in a few place at the same time, the truth is the same electron, just may use this particle as an example, may well appear in as many as 3000 different or possibilities locations simultaneously, this particular phenomenon is known in Quantum Physics as a wave purpose. So the entire market being made up of abdominal muscles tiny world with sub atomic dust exists in extremely position, or several potential locations, for a universal scale Quantum Physicists call the following the Field involving Potential.

This is modern for us all, it indicates that your reality is not necessarily fixed, it is accommodating, changeable, it can be improved from one form even to another, but who does your transforming and the way in which?

The Observer

The following brings me to your second point I want to consider, also an idea used in Quantum Physics called The Onlooker, and this principle straightaway affect and changes the Field associated with Potential. So what could be the Observer? Well, you will be the Observer, and ever other sensitive individual on the planet. Together with what does a Observer do? This Observer is responsible for that collapse of the send function. What will do that mean? Basically this in essence means whenever you consciously take notice of the Quantum Field people snap your truth of the matter into a single setting in time and breathing space. Scientists conduct sophisticated experiments with debris that bare released this concept therefore certainly aligns by using my own experience.

Then when we observe the Quantum Field, the world, this universe, what standing do we fall the wave performance to? Where does indeed our reality finish off? Well that is figured out by what you believe, together with I'm not making reference to your religious allegiance, I'm talking about genital herpes virus treatments believe your truthfulness should be with just about every fibre of your increasingly being, which is taught around the Law of Attractive force, it's just not typically explained that properly. Now you are not the only real Observer collapsing your wave function setting reality by what everyone believe, everyone is a great Observer, and that is from vital importance to learn. To properly use the Law of Drawing card we need to somehow switch the way other people see reality, and we will examine that shortly.

Rewiring The Mind

Finally we should instead consider how it can be that we change some of our fundamental beliefs approximately ourselves and within the world. Fortunately for individuals, the construct in our belief systems are in existence within the mind, within the complex structure with neural pathways that define the different instances the brain. I express fortunately, because current discoveries in neuroscience have revealed that this neural structure with the brain is really flexible, not strict and fixed when scientists first idea. You are not destined to remain locked in to manners and attitudes for the past, ways of considering and patterns involving belief that have been neurologically passed down to you from your ancestors through ones own DNA, you possess the capability to reconstruct a neural pathways inside your brain and generate a brand new construct associated with reality in your mind.

This can be a vital area of know-how that most Law from Attraction publications don't go into, most of the common Law with Attraction methods which include, focussed intention, and additionally holding an image inside the mind of a brand-new reality do receive an affect on the nerve organs construct of the head, but the affect may be temporary, because i am not taught methods to solidify the new generate for use above the long term. The people mind processes estimated at 100, 000 items of information per minute, yet we are just consciously aware of available 2000 bits of which information. What we should do is begin to figure out how to permanently alter that construct of our sensory net in order to see a new reality, being aware of things that everyone had never deemed before and for good change our serious beliefs about which we are and precisely what we are doing these.

Putting it all Jointly

So what does that all mean in connection with using the Law involving Attraction more properly? Your first purpose when attempting to fill out an application the Law of Destination must be to improve your fundamental certain principles about what your own the truth is in order to begin collapsing the quantum discipline to that new truth, but as I outlined earlier, you are not this only one that packages reality through confidence, and this is the location where the Law of Selling point really comes into its very own.

As you apply most of the methods around the Legal requirements of Attraction, visual images, intentions, gratitude or anything else, you create a more powerful reality for yourself, and therefore reality connects using corresponding vibrations inside minds of those approximately you. You will alter other most people beliefs in relation to most people, and they also set out to collapse the quantum field in position with your new actuality. Basically you produce a stronger personal truth of the matter that affects people around you, it's no game associated with chance, but with the Law of Attractive force properly does come to feel a little like stacking the chances in your favour. To look at first began to truly understand and submit an application the principles already mentioned, all the small information on my life began to switch, my life went because of 80 percent within the things that happened in my opinion being a disappointment to help 80 percent from things becoming definitely positive and miraculous virtually overnight.

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truethingsiwishicouldsay · 5 years

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What is your opinion on trans people? Like, the trans people who have transitioned and such?

OK, well, here are my thoughts, which are pretty nuanced so this gets long. I have bolded the main points to help break up the textwall.

First, the surgery thing. Whether or not a trans person has had gender reassignment surgery does not change my basic perception of them as a human being. They do not “qualify into womanhood or manhood” by getting surgery. They are not more or less valid as people because they treat their dysphoria with surgery or treat it in some other way. That’s an individual choice that should between them, their doctors and their loved ones.

It may change their bodies to inspire people at large to treat them according to their gender identities, which in turn helps their dysphoria. But I honestly feel like the FIRST goal of all people who are considering surgery that drastic shouldn’t be surgery to get others to accept your womanhood or manhood so you can accept yourself. It should be radical self-acceptance. You cannot afford to define yourself by others’ perception of you. There are just too many shitty people in the world.

If you can get to the place where you can truly say, “other people’s issues with me don’t define me” and have a basic foundation of self-respect to stand on, you’re in a better headspace to contemplate things like whole-body surgery, or deal with the side effects of a lifelong hormone regimen.

Now for the rest of my thoughts.

Unless they’ve done something awful, like Yaniv, I don’t come for individual trans people. Anyone who does that is a huge asshole and an actual transphobe. If I have a problem with a trans person it is 100% with something they did or with their politics, not their transness.

I am highly critical of modern transactivism and the way it eats away at the rights and boundaries of others, tries to politicize sexual entitlement, fucks with the definition of words, seems to specifically target cis women with demands, boundary violations and antagonism, is homophobic in its demands for sexual “access” to same-sex-attracted people, and encourages behavior such as nailing dead rats to rape recovery center doors, threatening people, and in my sister’s and my case, beating them.

Yeah, I got my ribs cracked by a trans woman tree times my size on the RUMOR that my sister was a TERF. A rumor spread vindictively by a drunk because she wouldn’t cheat on THE AWESOMEST WIFE IN THE UNIVERSE with her. I fucking HATE the TERF patrol. They silence and harm women. But that doesn’t give me the right to hate trans people.

Trans people are human beings who should be able to live their lives without abuse. That includes everything from idiots marching into their journals and bullying them and their partners on up to the Hell trans POC face in places like Brazil.

There is a difference between biologically-based sex and socially defined gender. “Trans women are women” doesn’t mean trans women are biologically female. Otherwise they would not be trans.

You can’t deny biological reality to cater to your dysphoria without putting yourself at risk healthwise, and without ending up at odds with pretty much everyone. I will call my trans brothers “dude” and laugh at their dropped-my-packer-in-the-bathroom stories and acknowledge their gender as male, but I’m still going to feel like I should say something if they’re having PCOS symptoms or something and won’t go to a doctor because dysphoria. Your body may not fit your soul, but it doesn’t deserve neglect.

Because gender is socially defined and often toxic, it’s up for grabs. Defy it, redefine it, jump gender boxes, set up new ones, whatever--do you.

Just don’t scream at people with no experience of it who don’t quite get it at first. I have no fucking idea what gender box you’re sitting in if you give no outward signs at all, so don’t yell at my scramblebrained self for not being psychic.

I try not to misgender people because I don’t like hurting people who aren’t even part of the conversation. That does not mean I don’t believe there’s no difference between the life experiences of transgender people and (what’s most commonly called) cis people. Of course there is.

Sex criminals who reinvent themselves as trans women to try and get into female prisons are absolutely fucking suspect.

If you want to change your body to match your sense of gender, that’s your business--so long as you pay real attention to the medical implications. I hear about trans guys hurting themselves with binders and my response is 100% like “Ow, oo honey, please be careful” and 0% like “look at this crazy person blahblahblah here’s some transphobia”

Puberty blockers and transing kids horrify me, in part because I know a kid going through it and he’s already suffering massive side effects. He’s. Nine.

I get pissed off when historical female heroes get transed. Let us have our heroes. Don’t try to redefine every brave, gender-defying woman as a man.

I am wary of self-ident because of the ways it is being abused.

Dysphoria sounds like absolute Hell. Personally I’m not sure surgery and such is the answer, but it’s not something I have ever dealt with. I certainly don’t think people should be pressured into surgery and hormones as “the answer” or “the only answer”.

Cotton ceiling activists are fighting for the sexual coercion of women and are loathsome. Nobody owes anybody sex, and thinking otherwise is a sign of toxic male socialization, full stop.

Many of the problems such as bathroom bills could be more easily addressed through physical innovation rather than political arguing. What we need is better design of public lavatories to provide everyone with both truly private and accessible public space. This would include everything from protecting from predators and privacy-invaders, to making sure everyone can pee without having a damn sex/gender debate at the door.

Biological males do not belong on girls’ high school or college sports teams, or in women’s competitive sports. Growing up male gave them physical advantages whether they acknowledge it or not. Also if a man in his fifties is on a high school or college women’s sports team because he “feels like a teenage girl” and you don’t think that’s suspect...

Girlhood and sexism are experienced by cis women and non-passing trans men. Boyhood and male privilege are experienced by cis men and non-passing trans women. People treat you according to the sex they perceive you to be, not the gender you perceive yourself to be. How people perceive and treat you determines your socialization and experience of sexism and privilege, not how you identify.

Screaming transphobia because a conversation about biological female health “doesn’t include trans women” is simply irrational. If you don’t have the plumbing or deal with the issues, the conversation doesn’t apply to you. Derailing conversations about female biology to nitpick about the words used is also a silencing tactic. On the other hand, I will gladly bitch about periods with trans guys and acknowledge that when it happens they’re probably wrestling with an additional burden of heavily triggered dysphoria.

Female erasure is real. The tendency of transactivists to demand that words like “front hole” and “uterus holders” be used on us to spare their feelings COMPLETELY IGNORES WHAT BEING REFERRED TO LIKE THAT DOES TO US. Half the human population should not face dehumanizing language and treatment so that a small percentage of the population can feel a little better.

Feminists have also noticed that 99.9% of the time, it’s women who are expected to give ground, change our language, and change our behavior to accommodate. Men don’t face the same expectations. They are not confronted online, their organizations are not attacked, their buildings are not defaced. Transactivists have a huge sexism problem.

It is absolutely possible to be of the female gender and yet rampantly, blatantly and deeply discriminate against members of the female sex. Any wariness I have of trans women largely stems from negative experiences of trans female sexism and assault against trans men and cis women.

Sexism, sexual entitlement, out of control tantrum-throwing, taking pleasure in threats and use of violence, demanding to be at the center of every movement you are in (whether transgender or feminist, for example), and the demand that biologically female people cater to you are all signs of toxic male socialization. I used to rather arrogantly say that trans women should jettison these as part of their transition, but the truth is that every human being should. But it’s still causing problems.

TLDR: it really depends on the specific trans issue and how it intersects with Feminism, social pressures, self-image, and scientific fact. Transactivism has huge problems, but trans people are human beings who deserve basic consideration and respect regardless.

#transgender #Anonymous

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nondescriptperson234234123423 · 5 years

Text

Leftist (social) media and its effectiveness

Call to action: if you know of any attempts to do any of the things in this post (specific or achieving the same aims) and think it appropriate, please reply to this post and describe/link to them! More ideas are also welcome, as is active investigation of what has worked well or poorly in the past.

This is going to be a personal post of little interest or relevance to anyone else, but I wanted to get some thoughts down. I'm coming from a background of almost no organising work outside of anti-racist protests and Food not Bombs work, so this post contains almost no investigation and no trial in the crucible of actual activity. With that health warning in place, in summary: there are things that leftist content consumers (including myself - this is primarily a personal post), leftist discoursers, content creators and online leftism in general can do differently, to encourage more active participation and growth beyond Communism 101 type consciousness.

It feels like there has been an explosion of leftist ~content~ over the past few years: Breadtube (despite its obvious and infuriating flaws), podcasts (RevLeft Radio is my current favourite), and the gradual, partial normalisation of radical leftist talking points on some social media platforms. Whether this is actually true, or whether it merely reflects my own developing interest, I don't honestly know. (I think the question demands investigation, actually - perhaps even an online survey, measuring perception of growth alongside how many years the respondee has engaged with online leftism, could help begin answer this question.) This is a good thing, of course. But it feels important to examine the limitations of this form of political education and how they might be overcome.

Clearly, at the level of propaganda, any useful contribution to the ongoing battle for consciousness must be welcomed. But there is a danger that such work can only ever lead to a helpless, shallow understanding of our condition and our enemies, with neither theoretical depth nor a convincing path (or action schema) towards collective liberation. The danger is that this actually contributes to what Mark Fisher called Capitalist Realism: essentially, defeatism, impotent undirected rage and an inability to theorize a way forward. Even work aimed at more advanced content consumers, such as RevLeft, while laying out one possible way forward, can never impart the sort of deep understanding and agency necessary to turn passive listeners into effective wielders of the theory that is being discussed: such dexterity can only come from active engagement. Such active engagement, whether practical or theoretical, is essential not only in combating passivity, but in preventing book worship (Mao's term) and a failure to perform concrete analysis of concrete conditions.

The question, then, is how to bridge the chasm in the road from primitive, immediate, reactive class consciousness, to passive consumer, to active participant. This is of course dependent on the stage of development of the movement(s).

Engagement with the masses has been well-covered from Maoism's Mass Line to some genuinely insightful Anarchist works on the interdependent development of means and ends in the progression of revolutionary consciousness (well-summarized in some of YouTube's Anarchopac's videos and during her RevLeft appearance). Careful work is needed, however, to strengthen the early stages of the pipeline and overcome the disparateness and inherent isolation of online communication.

With regards to the more theoretically inclined, what is absolutely obvious is that passive consumption of theory is useless. It breeds complacency, anti-experimental/"scientific" dogmatism (Engels: Socialism Utopian and Scientific, expanded into useful philosophy and praxis by Mao) and theoretical helplessness. The medium of online leftism greatly expands our reach, but that medium demands passive engagement - it does not even facilitate active reading, just hours of listening, often without even a pause of a few seconds for thought. Demanding that listeners do background reading and join IRL orgs where possible is essential. This post is partly a call to action for less engaged leftists (including myself) to actively read and participate more. To help transform geographically isolated listeners into users of theory (and perhaps cadres for proactive online activism), however, creating communities focussed on active theoretical engagement that goes beyond sectarian mud slinging seems essential.

The Guillotine podcast, before its downfall, had begun to build such engagement, and podcasts could provide one focus for more active, constructive engagement. Some other ideas:

* An actually-existing example: the Rebel Steps podcast, which describes various ways of getting involved with the cause in real life.

* Discord-based quasi-"reading groups", with one room per book, so that there is less pressure to keep up and so that ideas and interpretations may spread beyond a single group of individuals. Room ground rules/ethos could be inspired by those of Mao's Combat Liberalism and similar works. Technologically, both Discord (the mainstream) and open-source alternatives (resilient) should be used, preferably wired together or at least linked to each other channel by channel - one technology would predominate but the other would sit in reserve, and open source capabilities and know-how would be spread.

* Promotion of the use of WiFi mesh networks where there is a sufficient density of people, and the hosting of community message boards on them.

* An app(s) containing study questions and literature. "Solutions" in the form of secondary literature, and answers to "right/wrong" type questions.

* a 4chan style message board. Could be the basis of campaigns, discussion etc.. We can never out-lie the alt right or achieve the same effectiveness in self delusion, so do not try to blindly copy /pol/ - but we have to counter the takeover of neutral subreddits by right wing trolls, for example. Must not be hosted in fascist-infested boards such as 8chan.

* ways of publicising events to which we want to attract new potential activists, at the risk of fash knowing about them. E.g. counterprotests in my area, info evenings, etc.

* self help resources, practices, tools.

* collective help groups (for addictions, loneliness etc.) with an explicitly leftist character.

* platforms or use of existing tools for collaborative content creation.

We must then deliberately connect these with mainstream spaces, in a two-way fashion: build selective channels from the mainstream to these more advanced spaces, and use the spaces to muster engagement with the mainstream.

Recreation is also important, and our down-time must be channelled effectively. Just as IRL, community gardens can provide not only relaxation, healing and a social space, but community engagement and visible power, so our online spaces and online recreation must be neither dissolved into the mainstream nor isolated from it.

A final random thought: if you're a Breadtuber and you want to make a video about a mainstream subject, think about what sort of audience you want and title your video accordingly. If you want Youtube to flag it as extremist content and only show it to committed leftists, then by all means start the title with "Capitalism and". (And maybe there's a legitimate reason why you'd only want leftists to see it.) But often I see deeply moving and highly effective videos, that often contain a fantastic, non-explicit anticapitalist message, pushed from the mainstream into the subcultural sphere by lousy titles.

Known resources:

* MutualSupport subreddit

* Rebel Steps podcast

* RevLeft discord channel (patrons only)

* BadEmpandana discord channel (patrons only)

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stedes-black-bonnet · 5 years

Text

My Baby Does Me: Chapter 24

POV: John Deacon x reader; this is a Roger chapter, FYI.

Notes: Masterlist? We have one! Tag list? Got that covered, too. Sorry it took so long for this chapter! Life, you know?

Warnings: idk philosophy?

Abstract: My new purple shoes...

----------------------------

What is color? Roger knew there was some schmaltzy science behind it. No matter how many times it was explained to him, color wasn’t anything scientific, and it never would be. Those kinds of definitions were too rigid. He was instinctively suspicious of anything or anyone lacking feeling, and clear-cut scientific definitions were at the forefront of his misgivings. It was probably why he made such a poor biologist himself; not that he wasn’t smart enough for it; no, rather, he didn’t trust anything that painted the world in such black and white terms. He didn’t trust anything that was merely black and white. Black and white.

He just didn’t trust it.

Wouldn’t trust it.

Couldn’t.

For Roger, color was art, feeling, expression. For Roger, color was life. Color was living. It was inherently alive. You couldn’t look at a rose and think it wasn’t alive, as bursting with it as it was the color red. You couldn’t think of a single color and not link it to a specific memory. For Roger, he couldn’t think of the color orange without thinking of a dress his mother wore when he had been a child, which led him to the shape of her hands, and how she always smelled of vanilla, and how she would bring him cookies while he did his homework, and would always help him prank his father. None of this had to do with the color orange; and yet, all of it had to do with his memory of the color orange. So, in a sense, when he thought of color being life, what he meant was that color made up the interior of our memories like our words make up the interior of books. Each color had a feeling, and those feelings linked to whatever memories those colors inhibited for each of us. It was life. Color was life.

Color was emotions.

Color was his emotions.

Color was memory.

Color was the physical embodiment of the metaphorical heart. Of his heart. Not the heart muscle, no; but the heart we associate with love, with falling in love, with passion, with life, with exploration.

Color was love.

Color was falling in love.

Color was falling…

Color was his lifeblood. His eyesight had always been sub-par. Despite any qualms, Roger saw with his heart. He trusted his heart above all. It was an intuitive trust built on no scientific facts, or calculated numbers. It boiled down to a faith in himself; Roger believed in himself. Trusting himself, and his excessively accurate and discerning perceptions had always been easy and right. Sight had nothing to do with seeing, but it had everything to do with feeling; sight was interpretation, interrogation, and inclination. Color and texture were merely the tools of predilection and empathy linked entirely to the sensation we call seeing. Color and texture were his gateway into seeing, which he did with his heart and his eyes, which for Roger, were one the same. Those two aspects ruled his heart, and he let them sway him in whatever direction they’d take him.

Color and texture made him the clotheshorse he had become when unlimited funds cascaded his way. Everything needed to look good and feel good; after all, when you had such a flawless canvas to accessorize, you might as well as use the best to adorn it. Texture was the physical embodiment of feeling good. What felt good made him feel good. It was as simple as that. This, however, caused most people to mistakenly assume he was a creature of the surface pursuits, of banal Epicureanism, of being dastardly shallow. This couldn’t be farther from the truth; Roger swam deeply into people, their desires, and their motivations, and because he could do this, he found himself happily succumbing to the conclusion that everyone was beautiful. Roger would try anything once; it was just the kind of man he was. Just because he surrounded himself with beautiful objects, objects of color and light, didn’t mean he did the same with people; to him, everyone was beautiful, everyone glowed with colors, memories and feelings of their own, unique to them and formed from a core of colors, sculpted in the past, all wrapped up in one scrumptious vessel, which was entirely knowable if you had the charm to whisk the colors, to whisk the words from somebody; if you could do this, you could know them in totality.

For Roger, the deeper he had to search for your beauty, the harder he had to work to acquire it, the more intrigued and interested he would be; not that he’d drop you the second he found your shining core, but that his interest was driven by one’s ability to keep him guessing, in suspense, in the chase. The chase could last forever, with the right partner. Beauty started outwardly and rarely would contain itself to those boundaries. The stronger your inner beauty was, he was convinced it would spill out of a person like an overflowing well. Un-containable, unapologetic, inconsolable.

Inner beauty made him full.

Inner beauty was color.

Inner beauty was the core of all emotions.

Inner beauty was what Roger did his best to hide from the world; that was the consecrated ground he attempted to keep for himself alone. Perhaps that was why he cherished it in others so much, and was always looking for it, hoping you’d surprise him with inescapable beauty. And, well, the inherent chase inner beauty brought to the game was an insurmountable attraction for him. Roger was always playing games. And the chase was one of his favorites.

The chase was immediacy.

The chase was color.

The chase was feelings.

The chase was his heart; it presented the secret desires of a person better than asking them, at times. People could lie; but Roger didn’t think memories could. Lies were words, facts, but perverted facts. Memories had little to do with facts and everything to do with feelings and impressions. Memories were personal, subjective, kernels of emotions painted in colors. Chasing the truth was a pointless waste of time; it was unobtainable for Roger; but chasing memories, was much more fascinating, fun, and entirely more telling than facts.

Inner beauty was worth the chase.

Sex was worth the chase.

Harmonic memories were worth the chase.

Really, anything was worth the chase for Roger.

Besides people and their hidden emotions, which would always be the sexist thing about a person for Roger, he also enjoyed chasing music and cars. Both of these were also inextricably connected to Roger’s emotional core and needs. If color—emotions—were Roger’s lifeblood, music was his livelihood. In music, Roger gave color to the world. It was through this medium he shared his heart most freely. It is easy to share your heart when you can hide it behind art. Look at this shiny trinket, it might contain my heart, but focus on the glowing parts, and ignore the truth. It was just, as it always was, another game. A game of misdirection.

Misdirection was the flip-side of denial. For you typical did one to others and one to yourself, and Roger was living in both, inflicting both upon himself simultaneously. He was in denial about his heart, and his misdirection for himself was his denial, and his denial was color.

And he tried to not think about her.

And colors didn’t exist anymore.

And he felt empty.

Roger didn’t know what time it was. Did it matter anymore? Probably not. Blimey. Time was just elongated memory, wasn’t it? Memory was her. Memory was her.

Memory was her.

But he didn’t want those memories anymore. He wasn’t completely sure what day it was, to be completely honest. To be completely candid, for he was a transparent fellow if there ever was one, he wasn’t sure he cared he didn’t know what day it was. He should care, he knew that at least. He should care about what time it was and when it was on the timeline of the week. But he just didn’t. Wouldn’t. Couldn’t.

I have obligations, he thought, mainly that horrid dinner about the disaster trash that is the album they’re all writing. He didn’t want to think about it. And he didn’t want to think about her.

Roger rolled over in bed.

At least he thought it was his bed. It smelled like his bed. It felt like his bed. The pillows all had the same weights he remembered from before? The heavy damask blankets were in the same patterns he recalled picking out. This had to be his bed. And yet...

And yet.

All of the coverings were grey.

They hadn’t been before. Had they?

No. They hadn’t been.

This isn’t right, Roger thought. He reached a shaking hand past his actual glasses (they had a thin layer on dust on them) and flicked on a sleek lamp resting on the bedside table. The light flashed on.

He turned it off again.

Then he turned it on again. The lighting change in the room was almost imperceptible. The room seemed brighter? Yes. Definitely brighter.

He turned the light off again.

It made no sense. He’d rather not see it.

Everything was greys.

Everything was blacks.

Everything was whites.

He sat up in bed. He looked at the lamp distrustfully.

He turned it on again. Roger ripped the futuristic-looking lamp from the table, unscrewed the light-bulb from it, and flung it across the bedroom. The bulb hit a seven-foot tall sculpture that could be best described as if Kandinsky had ever made a statue, this is what he would have made: all prismatic shapes, sublime chaos, and whirling colors all held together by lines and light. It used to be his prized possession; however, now, it felt like it was screaming at him from across the room. Maybe it was, he thought. Maybe it was moving towards him right now. Screaming. In black and white.

He held the lamp up, more useless now than ever, like a sword at the sculpture.

Of course, it’s not moving, he thought, laughing to himself.

Roger hurled the lamp across the room, just to be safe. What use was light when there was no color, he moaned.

He went over to his bay-window, and felt the familiar warmth of sunlight; light was streaming in, he figured, and it was day. It smelled like day. He sat at his vanity. He turned on the Tiffany lamp.

Nothing really happened. Brightness, but no color. He picked up the rare lamp, thought about tossing it out the third story window, and settled for putting it in the closet. He kept his eyes closed while doing so; he couldn’t bring himself to look at his clothes.

He sat back down at the vanity that used to be his favorite color, and began pulling open its drawers. He began taking out pair after pair of sunglasses. He had quite the prolific collection. Every color, every shape imaginable resided in his collection. All perfectly matching his prescription, even. Just so he’d never have to wear his actual glasses.

Her coat was on the chair. He could feel it. Her black fur coat. He stood up again, and put it in the closet next to the lamp, on the top shelf. He resumed his seat, he picked up the first pair of tinted sunglasses, and he put them on. Everything was darker, but not colored.

He put the pair back on the table, and he tried the next pair.

And everything was sharper, but not colored. He removed that pair, placed it upon the table.

Roger picked up the next pair, shoved it on his face, opened his eyes, and yelled. He ripped the glasses off, and slammed them on to the vanity. And everything was removed from time.

From memory.

From color.

From heart.

Breathing deeply, shakily, he picked up the next pair, and put it on.

He looked at himself in the mirror.

Everything was grey.

He picked up the next pair--

He picked up--

An arm grabbed him, suddenly, spun him around, and Brian May said, “Rog, what in bloody hell are you doing!?”

--------------------

Tag List: @phantom-fangirl-stuff @triggeredpossum @obsessedwithrogertaylor @groupiie-love@partydulce@richiethotzierz@sophierobisonartfoundationblr@psychostarkid@teathymewithben@smittyjaws@just-ladyme@botinstqueen @mydogisthebest@little-welsh-wonder@maxjesty@deakysdiscos@yourealegendroger@marvellouspengwing@molethemollie@deakysgirl@arrowswithwifi@tardisgrump

#john deacon x reader #Roger Taylor #roger taylor x reader #ben hardy #brian may #gwilym lee #bohemian rhapsody #queen #queen x reader

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ceriseskies · 5 years

Text

It’s 5am Let’s Fucking Do This

Dear Transgender Transmedicalists.

You’ve been on my mind recently. I made this very emotionally driven post to get some of my frustration out, and well, the response I got from one of you, was— well, I got roasted.

So. Feeling like I owed a debt or something, I’ve done a little research, I’ve gone through some of your blogs. I have read actual trans people’s takes on you. And I think I’m going to to bring a new weapon to the ring: empathy. It’s not one I see a lot of use of on Tumblr.

Because there’s one thing you’re absolutely right about: Most, or at least a sizable amount of “truscum” are transgender.

(For the uninitiated, that means they believe you need gender dysphoria to be trans—non-dysphorics are called “transtrenders” or “tucutes”. Usually, but not always, comes with nb-phobia.)

First of all, I want to say where I think you’re right, because it’s only fair, and I want to show I’m being sincere about this.

For starters, I know Tumblr has this “you’re perfect and valid just the way you are babey!!!! Don’t change a thing!!!! <3<3<3!!!” And I can see why someone who suffers from severe dysphoria and needs medical transition for their mental health is scared off by that. I’m not here to police your positivity. If hearing someone tell you “your hormones are coming, and your transition will be smooth, quick, and soon, and you’ll come out of it a beautiful girl/handsome man” is what keeps you alive, then surround yourself in it. I want you to be healthy and happy.

Also, I believe that no one should have to date a trans person. That’s rapey. HOWEVER, I would question what makes someone uncomfortable about it. The genitalia? Okay, that’s valid. But a lot of other excuses are pretty thinly veiled transphobia, because no matter what kind of man/woman you like, a there’s a transgender person who fits those requirements. And don’t date someone transitioning away from the gender you’re attracted to. That’s sleazy.

And honestly, I think a lot of the “non-dysphoric” trans kids do experience some dysphoria, judging by their accounts. Just not an overwhelming, crippling level like I see most transmeds experience. There’s a lot of misinformation about it, and can see why they might not recognize it. And there’s a lot of dysphoric people would don’t even realize they have it until they become acquainted with their real gender. I would estimate that 90% of trans/nb people will experience some degree of it at some point in their life.

But even if 100% were dysphoric, I’d still be opposed to it being the defining characteristic. Why? Well, it makes being transgender sound like a medical disorder. And the idea of an LGBT (and continued, but that’s for another day, kids) identity being considered a disorder gives me major ick vibes—think conversion therapy, religious exorcisms, homosexuality being in the DSM…

Let’s start by breaking down the philosophy, because I can’t start telling you what you believe is wrong until I assess what you believe.

The belief of your average “truscum” is that gender dysphoria is the core of ThE TRanS eXpErIeNcE, whereas “trenders” believe gender to be a less tangible and more fluid concept.

It’s essentially dysphoria cure-seekers versus the gender truth-seekers, which, are the terms I’m gonna use now, because as a non-trans individual all these words feel dirty in my mouth.

Dysphoria sucks. And a lot of the cure-seekers are very much displeased with their trans identity. To them, being cis is good—they want to be cis. They encourage those comfortable with their assigned gender to be happy about it! Therefore, they’re completely at odds with the gender-is-a-social-construct, down-with-cis ideology of the gender “truth-seekers” who are encouraging kids to create new genders and just find what feels right. They can’t imagine having fun being trans—it hasn’t been for them.

And because of that, well, I can never be too mad at them.

There’s also an element of deep insecurity. Pretty much every dysphoria cure-seeker has latched on hard to the idea of brain sex, despite the science being shaky at best. It gives you the explanation you need for your dysphoria. You want a solid scientific ground, not just cheesy platitudes about it being ~how you feel inside~.

Just like every other trans person on Tumblr dot com, you’re seeking validation. That’s normal. Even you worry about being fakes sometimes.

But let’s not get too ahead ourselves here, it’s still mostly about people who aren’t “trans enough”.

The problem here is that in seeking your own validity, you’re stomping on other trans people.

I’ll let Casey, a lovely, 100% bona-fide trans woman, take it from here.

Now, usually when I hear the word “transtrender”, I find it’s not usually used at someone who has professed a lack of dysphoria. It’s usually someone who is being trans “incorrectly”.

For example, Riley J Dennis gets called a trender a lot, despite her talking about her own dysphoria on several occasions.

See, there’s a real fear that all these new gender experimenters are going to make the trans community look like a joke.

There’s a belief that these cool-new-gender-flexible-trans-kids are reinforcing trans about trans being a trend, and thus, blocking “real trans” from getting the help they need.

And you’ll notice that neither of these complaints has anything to with dysphoria. This is whining about people being annoying.

This is… very optics-focused. And hey, I think Tumblr downplays the importance of looking good to the average public. However, actual people matter more than outside impressions.

And also, who is the audience for this? Transphobes?

This tangential comment thread on Innuendo Studios’s “White Fascism” video gets it.

A lot of you simply want to assimilate into society as your real gender. You want to pass, be given the right pronouns, and get the hormones and surgery you deserve. And you want cis people to acknowledge you the correct way.

And so you try your best to be the “ideal trans person” for the cisgendered. You experience dysphoria, you want to pass, you’re actively seeking transition.

Sometimes you even join in the bullying.

There’s a lot of sucking up here. All lot of trying to to prove yourself to someone who wants you to suck them off.

And I refuse to suck the cishets’ metaphorical dicks. However, their real dicks might still be on the table if they treat me right,

Look, there’s quite a few transphobes out there who are unwilling to admit they’re transphobes, are looking for a cop-out. And this rhetoric enables their transphobia, using this guise which even comes with free trans supporters!!!

But eventually, they’ll turn on you. When you start challenging their perceptions, when you start stepping on their toes, when you become too inconvenient to be a shield against accusations of transphobia, they’ll toss you right in the garbage with all the “trenders” and “tucutes” you’ve been stomping on, and something tells me you’re not getting a warm welcome in that “garbage can”.

And they’re going to treat you like shit. And you’re going to be surprised when they teach you like shit. You’re going to have to learn the hard way that a conditional ally is not a real ally, and your beliefs are all about being conditionally accepting.

Transphobes don’t care about you or your struggles. If they did, they wouldn’t be transphobes.

What’s all of this going to get you?

What’s the endgame? Like when you kick out all the transtrenders, what will you have earned?

Will you have taken back your “trans spaces”? Will you have gotten rid of those annoying kids at the expense of actual people who need those places?

Will you have more of the non-finite trans resources?

What will that earn you?

You do realize that if you achieved your goal, you’d probably just start attacking each other, right?

And then we’d be back at square one. Because if there’s one thing all humans, cis, trans, or nonbinary, it’s someone to feel better than, no matter how stupid or toxic the reason is. Look. I don’t know what’s going on in each of your individual heads, and I don’t know any of you personally. I can’t tell you what has personally driven you to transmedicalism, but I hope you leave it behind one day.

All I can say is that I know a lot of you have had your own struggles, and as a (maybe?) good cis ally and fellow LGBT person, I sympathize with you. I’ve done my best to try and dismantle your worldview.

And I want you to know: it gets better. I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I know someone does, especially someone who’s ideology portrays their very being as inherently suffering.

Look, my PMs are open if you want to talk to me about this (or anything else). Please be polite, don’t come at me with callous accusatory questions you don’t actually want me to answer.

With love,

Cerise

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insanityembraced · 5 years

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Abnormal, Different, and Sometimes Extraordinary But Not Defective or Degenerate

I suffer from borderline personality disorder. It drastically influences my thoughts, actions, and understanding of the world around me. My perception, is and will always be altered by my, some say warped, I say realistic and unnaturally insightful, evaluation of emotional energy.

My personality disorder, label, or peculiarity, to me is a gift and makes me exceptional, not broken or in some way dangerous to leave unsupervised amongst non-afflicted personalities that perceive the world in a bland, underwhelming, and arguably are disordered, because they have lost or failed to attain enough focus or mental dexterity. In fact, the more we allow rigidity to limit man kinds ability to feel, sense, and accurately understand the emotional forces that bond us to each other and create the vivid colors of passion, creativity, and intensity only strong emotional tethers can sustain.

Sometimes my intensity and extrasensory ability is overwhelming and manifests in ways society labels as disordered, but in reality it is extraordinary and has mostly served to save rather than hinder my ability to navigate life. However, not every cloud is bright and humanity will always struggle with self control when faced with uncertainty and inesacapable animalistic urges that test our ability to get perspective in a world that never stops changing and evolving.

The following are some things that give insight into the extraordinary or even completely debilitating effects of my borderline personal perception of a world others see differently than I am capable of understanding:

I am insanely fickle. I can change my mind over and over and often times drastically reimagine my understanding of people and how we have shaped this globe or domed furmament into a prison with imaginary boundries created by hate and fear continuously infused into every fiber of human understanding.

As humanity becomes more and more oblivious to pure unadulterated empathy our sense of self blurs and society begins to eliminate diversity by allowing humanity to be silenced by fear built atop a drift of sand in the desert. However, even after the mirage has been unveiled as an invasive and aggressive sickness that has spread over the world consuming the rage and ignorance created by destroying pure empathy and viciously ripping humanity apart.

The more I explore the reaches of human understanding the less I believe we are even capable of understanding anything with certainty. Those who have attained great knowledge should have also gained an openness to the existence of many different kinds of intellectual perception that transcends traditional understanding of fact, fiction, or hypothetical scientific "certainty". Now I am convinced that the only thing I know with absolute certainty is that knowledge is currently to vast to contain within the limitations of our perception.

One thing that plagues those allegedly inflicted with a sickness so pervasive it has apparently permanently corrupted our souls and left us with scarred and impossibly broken personalities that now defines us entirely. Civilized, brainwashed, and fluoridated masses, given an instinctual fear of people labeled as mentally I'll. This instinct is based on a indistinct and uneducated manipulation of the different types of intellectual dexterity that can bless, awaken, and be a source of harmonious unification; instead the talents that I possess give me a different perspective on nearly everything. Different does not mean wrong. Failure of other humans to understand me or grasp the fiber of what makes me decipher the world in a different fashion that transcends even our sense of culture or language to create a group of individuals who consistently perceive stimuli from feeling, emotion, electrical charge of ions affected by forces not understood by those who close their mind to bothering with the difficult task of trying to think with other parts of your brain, even if it is unnatural or difficult.

I believe all intellectual or sensory talents are of value and should be developed in different environments that foster the use and improvement of our naturally occurring talents in says that create harmony and richer depth of understanding once we have opened our minds to different sensory observations that do not prove I am insane. All your label has done is help me to understand myself in a deep and intensely critical fashion that has helped me truthfully identify things I need to work on controlling and I also have had the opportunity to evaluate my triggers, identify signs of irrational or destructive thinking. This has allowed me to develop and institute coping mechanism and other internal and external tools to keep myself from allowing myself to overload my sensory system, not because I am permanently and invasively altered by psychic dysfunction that renders me a rambling, irrational nutcase unworthy of being trusted, believed, and people labeled borderline or who are labelled as having a personality disorder are just blessed with different sensory sensitivity that does create distinct differences in observation and unless there is effort exerted to understand and effectivy communicate with individuals who have a spacial or coordinated dexterity that can traslate into movement fluidity or accuracy that I am not natuRally blessed with and need help understanding and fostering such talent since I have an actual natural tendency to manage to fall inexplicably without warning or even applicston of outside force, but simply an internal lack of balance and a long term battle with my ability to see and thus manage my four dimensional space with grace.

All of this introspective personal reflection and growth should be a part of every human being on earth. Then those who suffer from similar difficulty in adjusting to certain triggers do not need to be defined by their diagnosis. The diagnosis is just how we find people who understand why my perception is differently aligned. We do not have to be feared, send to bedlam because of fear, or an irrational fear I will suddenly and violently embody my Hollywood stereotype and fatal ataction someone because I have been labeled and my internal bomb has been officially triggered.

Of coarse that is ridiculous and even people with the same disorder or same perspective still live life with shifting social, financial, qwwd many times has lead even similar differently abled souls to different ways to use our gifts to hopefully work towards harmony and unxersdnsign. 0⁰

t at your own understanding of the things you percieve. f we could acceptinstead of trying to force humanity into a mold f different talents and maybe even extraordinary abilities understanding with our surroundings. efear fear my extra personality have particularl feared the intense s have a history of failing to comply with medications and I am not good at consistently maintaining routine of anykind. I can only maintain a routine for days, occasionally weeks, and rarely have I ever maintained a consistent routine for more than six months.

I am capable of liking or becoming interested or disinterested in anything without warning. I consume myself with a fiery intensity for things that I will let consume me until I burn out. I have completely abandoned interests, hobbies, people, or career paths in a moment. The thing that I wanted to do every minute for the last 6 months, like when I fell in love with painting, instantly and without warning become unfulfilling, tedious, and inferior to a new and exciting passion to focus my obsessions on. I feel so intensely that I cannot enjoy or contain my energy in any repetitive or monotonous activity.

I unintentionally attract emotional disfunction; I have an uncontrollable urge to save certain dysfunctional or misunderstood humans; I become particularly enraged by the self designated elite, and often intellectually inferior humans, that intentionally exploit the weak, poor, uneducated, or disenfranchised; I cannot always protect myself from the emotions of others, human emotion produced by strangers can be so powerful I have literally fallen to my knees, began crying uncontrollably, or even been unable to breath based on proximity alone; pure emotion can be released from the body like a shockwave, but only if the emotion is genuinely produced; I cannot always distinguish liars, but I can always spot people who really are devoid of any kind if emotional depth, and they are the truly dangerous, because they dont care, feel, or empathize with humanity at all; I am intensely impulsive, particularly when I am having difficulty understanding and communicating with others; I am bad at maintaining relationships because of paranoia, constant fear of abandonment, and an inability to truly understand individuals; I only understand emotions and emotional energy, but fail miserably at understanding or anticipating actions driven by selfishness or purity of evil intent; I am unpredictable, even I cannot understand or predict all my begavior; once I cross the line into a psychotic episode, I lose all control, awareness, or ability to understand reality; I will black out entirely, and have absolutely no memory for hours or even days; when I gain control of my sanity the blackout lifts slowly like a thick fog; the lingering fog of psychosis is like a mental sedative that makes even simple tasks impossible, like remembering your name, or knowing if you are awake or asleep, or being able to understand basic human conversation; overwhelmingly emotional, and I have occasional breakdowns peppered with forced hospitalizations. Mental hospitals, particularly those that restrain the liberty of people who aren't capable of faking the numbness society expects of us all; are ineffectual, uninspired, and often the patients are treated without feeling, dignity, compassion, interest, competence, respect, understanding, and often staff not only refuses to listen, observe, or address any of the specific problems facing an individual. Instead the psychiatrists often do not even pretend to do their job and blindly medicate those they do not understand until they become someone else's problem.

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micropenisunveiled-blog · 5 years

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SPH & COMING OUT OF THE SMALL PENIS CLOSET

It is safe to say that most men who have a small penis have thought about whether or not to keep it secret or spill the beans. Coming out of the Small Dick Closet is a decision that each individual must make for himself. Quite honestly it is not safe for all gay men to come out of the closet. Similarly once you disclose that you have small penis that information has a tendency to become known.

For some men, fantasizing about being outed becomes the stuff of a fetish. I find the topic of Small Penis Humiliation (SPH) quite interesting. Certainly not all men with small penises have desire to be teased or humiliated, but there is a very real portion of the small penis population that seem to enjoy it. Based on conversations I have had with such men the SPH fetish seems to begin with the onset of adulthood. I have received a number of personal emails on this subject, from some men who are really turned on by this dynamic. This is a topic worthy of serious consideration for that group of men who enjoy teasing and outing. Despite my attempts to research this topic I have found very little in the way of research into the dynamics of this particular fetish.

Why Do Men Enjoy SPH? While I have found no scientific studies about this phenomenon, my own inquiries have revealed than in every case, the men with this fetish had experienced fairly significant ridicule, humiliation, or other abuse connected to their smaller endowment during childhood or their teenage years.

I have spoken with several men who have told me that their SPH fetish began for them in their teens, during gym class. They generally had experiences with boys in gym pointing and laughing. in some cases they were ridiculed by girls who had learned of their endowment from indiscrete peers. One man told me that a peer touched him, forced him to touch the other boy’s penis, made him masturbate, and called him queer.

While this is a terrible testament to the cruelty of teenagers, the men I spoke with grew past it. However, in coping with these experiences of ridicule, they began associating small penises with humiliation, and eventually with sexual pleasure. Since many, many people enjoy humiliation or degradation play as part of BDSM, I can see how this would make sense.

Most of us who live with a small penis spent some period in our lives diligently covering it up. Some men forgo participation in high school sports, remain chaste, refuse to change in public facilities, or otherwise work to keep their little secret just that, a secret. For those of us who have been outed--by family, girlfriends, boyfriends, team mates, school friends, etc. the consequences can be debilitating.

Do Men Subject to SPH Get Their Feelings Hurt?

Of the men I have spoken with, they all told me that it had hurt their feelings at first, but over the years they eventually they grew immune to it. One said he just realized he couldn't help it, as he could his weight or his hair color, and decided not to worry about it but enjoy getting the SPH attention he craved.

My Own Outing!

When I was outed in my sophomore year at school by bullies on a sports team, by shoving me out of the locker room naked into a gym full of other students, the three bullies got suspension for three days, but I served the life sentence. Basically the beans got spilled and my secret became common knowledge. I became an instant pariah, an object of ridicule, and social outcaste. Former friends avoided me because they didn’t want to be associated with me and become ridiculed themselves. Even my brother had a tantrum telling me that he wished he weren’t my brother because people assumed he also possessed a smaller endowment. So the consequences of an actual, real life outing, can be ego shattering. I never really recovered my social standing in school as there was always some bully who used my personal characteristics to put me down to build himself up. Also i had not yet learned how to “shrug off” teasing, and by reacting to it only made matters worse for myself. That’s the way it works.

Then Why Come Out Of The Small Penis Closet?

Given the reality of the negative consequences, why is it so arousing for some small endowed guys, to imagine themselves outed. Part of my theory is that in these cases the smaller endowed man is actually exhibiting some control in the outing process, which he believes in inevitable. For others the teasing has been linked to sexual activity, a potent reinforcer, so the fetish has basically been classically conditioned into being. For others, the actuality of being outed, is actually less anxiety provoking than managing the secret.

In the gay world, men do not come out of the gay closet to enlighten the world, they do it to feel better about themselves. At some point the gay man realizes that his own self esteem is taking more damage from his closeted status than from anything the world might actually send his way.

No one has any right to know about the size of your penis except your lover, so outing yourself is truly a personal decision, not a political one. However, when the truth gets withheld because of a self perception that your penis is shameful or inadequate, then at that point you’re just damaging yourself. Hiding a truth always most damages the person hiding the truth.

Men with a small penis on some level inherently realize that hiding the truth is not in their best interest and may begin to imaging how they would out themselves. Imaging these scenarios allows the individual to exert some control in a situation which feels out of control. So, why does even the mere possibility of it happening excite so many guys? This is another one of those no “one size fits all” answer.

So, how is a guy “outed?”

Well, the possibilities are really endless. Here are a few of the more common ways:

A close girlfriend (or confidant):

This is probably the most common scenario. Your wife tells her BFF that you have a small penis and requests that she doesn’t tell anyone else. The wife then tells her small endowed hubby/partner that her BFF knows, and it’s almost like the erotic gift that keeps on giving because from that point forward every time the hubby/partner sees the BFF it provides him with an ongoing source of both excitement and/or angst.

Multiple Girlfriends:

One man I have spoken with told me that he dreamed about being outed by his girlfriend to a group of her friends. He knew it was just a dream, but it left him feeling very uncomfortable. And no wonder he woke up uncomfortable, because now, his whole social circle of female friends knows about his secret. While he might be excited about this happening, and it might provide him an ongoing source of masturbation fodder, the ramifications of such a disclosure would no doubt be far reaching.

A Stranger:

One friend tells me about his girlfriend taking the initiative at a small town drug store to buy condoms, and at the counter asked the pharmacist, ion the presence of other patrons standing nearby “Do you have any small-sized condoms for my boyfriend?” He told me that he be felt himself blush with embarrassment as everyone turned to look at him and literally gulped. In this case he was outed by his girlfriend to a stranger in hi small town, where he knew that rumor would get retold. He heard all of it with his own ears and even saw the expression (probably a smile) on the female clerk’s face.

What are the risks of being Outed?

Many guys who expressed they desire to be outed also made it very clear they would want it done in a “controlled” way. But given human nature there is nothing controlled about the process. The only way to keep a secret it to keep it to yourself. Like sending a nude photo of yourself to a friend, you lose all control over it the moment you hit “send”. You are at the mercy of that friends discretion. And for the most part, humans are not very discrete.

People like to talk about “scandalous” news. People do this for many reasons. When your male friends make fun of your small penis, they are simultaneously casting themselves as “normal” or “endowed” men into a superior caste. Bullying has always been around, and I suspect it always will.

There are some very real consequences. Social ostracism, especially if you are in high school, been “perceived” differently by friends in the know, being teased, being ridiculed, sexual discrimination, or just being treated “differently” than how you were treated before. All of that can happen.

What are the Benefits?

When gay people began to come out and become recognized as “contributing citizens” and “role models” things began to change. However things do change slowly. Most men believe that any penis under 6 inches is “small”, when in fact recent studies have concluded that 5.17 inches in length and 4.6 inches in girth are true “average”. Statistically is you are average 90% of guys will be between 1.15" shorter or 1.11" longer than you. For years many men have believed that their 5 1/2inch penis was substandard, when in fact they were well within the biological norm. As men with small dicks stand up to be counted social norms will begin to change, but again social evolution is a slow process.

So What Can You Do?

Be true to yourself. Learn to channel your strengths and minimize your focus on your weaknesses. As much as our popular culture will foist the notion that you are no better than your penis, it just isn’t true. But now you have to convince other people of that. The only way to do that is when you believe it yourself. When you become self confident everything changes. People stop teasing you and start respecting you. Confidence, more than any other quality, determines the likelihood of success. Women identify “confidence” as a key attribute in attractiveness.

So What If You Enjoy SPH?

Be true to yourself. It is normal to have a fetish. Assuming it is not harmful, indulge in your fetish. And while a fetish isn’t harmful, if gets out of hand, it can be trouble. It can drive you and your sex life. Soon, it may also drive away the people close to you. You don’t have to deal with a fetish all your life. Here are a few signs that a small penis fetish is out of control:

It’s all you ever think about.

It makes you lose your concentration, and you start performing poorly at work or school because of it.

It comes up at random moments. Even when you’re not thinking about anything arousing, it comes to your mind.

It’s ruining your relationship or preventing you from being in a relationship.

You’re starting to drive your romantic partner crazy because of it, leading to arguments, misunderstandings and awkwardness during sex.

Some steps you can take to address a fetish are:

Confide in someone

Seek professional help which may include psychoanalysis, cognitive therapy, hypnosis, or

Stop engaging in the habit (easier said that done, ask anyone in NA,OA or AA).

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distractedhistotech · 5 years

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Ghost +1

Sydney was in the back of the van. She preferred it back there since she could move around more. Plus it felt weird staring out the window since losing her eye. She guessed it was the loss of depth perception. She was still learning how to gauge distance.

“So, that was kind of lame. Why did they think that guy was a ghost anyway?” asked Sydney as she tried to contact juggle some balls they had and dropped them all over the place. “He didn’t even put a lot of effort into his costume.”

“They were really superstitious,” said Arthur. “Only a few steps from being a cult when you think about it. They decide that anything strange has to have a supernatural or spiritual cause. Don’t even think there’s a scientific explanation because why couldn’t it be something that proves they’re right.”

“Arthur, you’re starting to ramble,” interrupted Vivi.

Arthur blushed. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine. They were a bit…extreme,” admitted Vivi. “I can see why it would upset you.”

Mystery decided this was a good reason to lay his head on Arthur’s lap. Sydney then flung her arms around him. “Yeah! I thought they were creepy too!”

“Sydney! I’m driving!”

“Pretty sure they thought I was an idiot,” continued Sydney. “I mean that tone they used with me was just insulting! Just because I’m missing an eye doesn’t mean I’m an idiot! Lots of people are missing parts and are smart! I’m not a pirate!” Sydney paused. “Actually, there were some pretty intelligent pirates. I don’t know where I was going with that. I seem to come back to pirates a lot lately. I know why I do, but it’s getting kind of old. I need to find something else to obsess with when I get riled up.”

“You could go back to talking about comics,” suggested Vivi.

Sydney sighed. “Yeah, I miss that…Why do I have so much trouble bringing comics up nowadays? It used to be second nature, but now I have to focus to talk about them. Even though I still love comics. It doesn’t make sense. Is this part of growing up? Part of recovering from a traumatic event? Both? It feels like something’s wrong. But isn’t that normal now?” Sydney rested her forehead on the back of Arthur’s head, not noticing how hard he was gripping the steering wheel. “Do you ever feel like that?”

“Yes,” said Arthur. He’d felt like it since he woke up in a hospital missing an arm, missing a friend, missing memories, missing so much… “I don’t think it’s gonna go away.” Mystery let out a whine and licked one of Sydney’s hands.

Vivi looked between the two as the mood quickly started to darken. God, she just wanted her two friends to be happy like they used to be. She needed to find a way to change the subject and make them smile. “Why don’t we pick up a couple of pizzas or something and then watch a couple of hours of Star Trek or Star Wars or Captain America?”

Arthur caught on to what she was trying to do and smiled. “That would be nice. It’s been a while since we hung out.” He frowned. “That’s my fault.” He’d been busy looking for Lewis. He was trying not to ignore his remaining friends, but it was hard when he wanted to find the other one and mentioning him did…something to them.

“What the heck are you working on anyway?” asked Sydney. “You’re not usually this secretive. You’re not trying to make a mechanical eye again, are you?”

“No!...Not usually anyway,” admitted Arthur.

“I can see where he’s coming from,” said Vivi. “I don’t think we can buy another eye if something else goes wrong. We need an alternative method.”

Sydney shuddered. “Okay, point taken. Being blind sucked. I don’t know how someone can live with that for a lifetime. Especially if you’re born like that! Can you imagine never knowing colors? And I bet light doesn’t make a lot of sense either. And you can’t play videogames!”

“Can’t work on cars or fabricate parts,” continued Arthur.

“Probably can’t paint either,” mused Vivi. “Unless the various colors smelled different from one another.”

Sydney wrinkled her nose. “Is-Is that a thing? And I don’t mean synesthesia! Can blind people have synesthesia? Or deaf people? Or anyone missing one sense?”

“What if sounds are linked to smell instead?” suggested Arthur.

“Can that happen?”

“Dunno. Maybe.”

“Pigments are just a type of chemical compound, so it would make sense for them to have a scent,” said Vivi, keeping the conversation from veering off in a completely different direction for once.

“Depends on the chemical. Some don’t have a scent, or at least the scent is too faint for humans to pick up on,” explained Arthur.

“I dunno, I swear I was smelling more right before you fixed my eye,” argued Sydney.

“It’s not quite the same thing. When you lose a sense you pay more attention to the ones that are left, like reassigning roles. We get the most information from sight, so when someone loses their sense of sight they pay a lot more attention to little things that they didn’t even realize they were ignoring. Also, I think there’s some neuroplasticity involved. Your brain isn’t using the part that used to be for putting together what your eyes saw, so it starts using it for other things over time.” Arthur was silent for a moment. “Um. But you, uh, would know better than me, given, you know. Sorry, I got a little too into the science papers I’ve been reading.”

Sydney smiled and shrugged. “It’s fine. I think it’s pretty interesting, even if I don’t understand all of it.” She tapped her eyepatch. “Does losing an eye affect how much of my brain it uses?”

“Just one? I’m not sure. You are seeing less…”

“Can you still smell and hear more than you’re used to?” asked Vivi.

Sydney shrugged. “Dunno. I don’t think so. Was kind of distracted at the time. Plus, everything looked different when I could see again.”

Vivi huffed. “It is just so unfair. How is it that my abilities still haven’t manifested but my half of the eye lets you see spirits?”

“It is really strange,” agreed Sydney.

“Maybe it’s because your abilities are already active,” suggested Arthur. “And you do have some control over ‘em.”

Vivi hummed in thought. “That might be it. There are still so many unknowns…”

“Hey, I don’t care how as long as no one else has to go blind,” said Sydney. “Besides, I’m sure something will wake you up eventually.”

“Yeah, but what if I’m like 40 when it finally happens?” complained Vivi. “Heck, if I have kids by then, they might have gotten their power before me…”

Arthur winced. “Do you want kids?”

Vivi nodded. “Of course! One, maybe two. I just have to find the right guy,” she said, giving Arthur a significant glance.

Arthur missed said glance entirely as he was distracted by thoughts of what could have been. Sydney was blind on that side. The only one to notice was Mystery, who huffed. Why did life have to be so difficult for these kids? The last time he’d had charges this prone to trouble…

It hadn’t ended well. Mystery would rather not dwell on the depressing memories.

Vivi realized her hint had gone over their heads yet again and decided to just move on. “Do you guys want kids?”

“I want one! So there can be a Sydney Scoville III!” proclaimed Sydney. “But just one. Don’t think I could handle more than that.”

Arthur was silent. Lewis wanted kids. He’d be an amazing father with how well he handled his sisters. “I dunno if I want children. I don’t want to pass on any of my issues.”

Vivi and Sydney both frowned at Arthur’s reasoning. “Most of your issues are due to your early upbringing,” pointed out Vivi. “You wouldn’t make those same choices and mistakes. That would prevent most of those issues from happening.”

“They could still pick up the behavior from me,” argued Arthur. “There’s only so much that I can change.”

“I don’t think you need to change,” said Sydney. “I mean, yeah, you’ve got anxiety issues, but lots of people do. You’re also smart and nice and help people and have cool hair and stro-”

“What if I attract something dangerous?” interrupted Arthur.

“Then I’ll just keep living nearby,” reasoned Sydney. She’d live with him if he asked. “I mean, I don’t see why I would leave Tempo.”

“Me either. Tempo is our home,” agreed Vivi. She placed a hand on Arthur’s flesh and blood hand. “We’re stuck with each other. For life.”

Arthur felt himself cheer up a bit at that. He gave Vivi a smile and tried to give Sydney one as best he could. Maybe he was being selfish, but he wanted to stay close to his friends.

And then the dashboard started to spark. Arthur’s eyes widened. “What?! No, no, no…” He stomped on the gas several times but failed to pick up speed.

Vivi frowned. “Is something wrong with the van?”

“There shouldn’t be! I just performed maintenance on it!”

Sydney raised an eyebrow. “Am I the only one who thinks the purple sparks were weird?”

Arthur blinked. “Purple?”

Sydney nodded. “Yeah, I was staring right at the dashboard.” The high beam light looked like a jellyfish. “Definitely purple.”

“That is not a thing that should happen!” shouted Arthur.

Vivi nodded. “Electricity’s supposed to just be white, which suggests this isn’t normal.” The van came to a stop right in front of…Vivi blinked several times. “A dancing mansion?”

Okay, it wasn’t actually dancing. However, it was sort of pulsing/bopping to a beat that one could fell in their bones. It was noticeably run down and purple and had eerie lights in the windows.

“There’s no way that’s not haunted,” deadpanned Sydney.

“Erm…” Arthur tried turning over the car again. “We don’t, have to investigate, do we?”

Vivi thought of what happened last time they’d jumped into an investigation without any preparation.

Blood. Hospitals. Loss. Guilt.

“If you can get the van started, we’re leaving,” said Vivi. “Sydney, you’re not wearing your suppressor?”

Sydney shook her head. “Still practicing controlling it on my own.”

“Good. Don’t reign it in.”

Mystery just stared at the mansion. He recognized its aura. He could barely believe it.

When did Lewis come back and what did he have planned?

Lewis was planning to exact his revenge. The plan had been simple: Create a mansion on a road that they often traveled along near Tempo (He couldn’t get into Tempo, but that could be because of some of the wards Vivi had tried setting up.), lure the Mystery Skulls (especially Arthur) into the mansion, separate them, bring Arthur to his location, kill Arthur, and reunite with the girls and Mystery, with possible minor changes as were needed. He was also open to making Arthur confess what happened to the girls (They must not have seen what happened to just go along with him.) before killing him.

The plan started to unravel as soon as the van came to a stop in front of his mansion. Part of that was because instead of rushing into the mansion on the heels of Vivi like he was expecting, they stayed in the van. And stayed. A lot longer than he recalled them ever doing so when he was alive.

Part of it was indirectly Sydney’s fault. He’d known that her aura was potent against malevolent spirits and the like, but he hadn’t really appreciated it until he felt it pressing down on him. From all the way outside. He found himself rubbing his temples. Ow. No wonder the nastier spirits went out of their way to avoid her. He was actually leaking some energy. He could last for some time as long as he was careful, but theoretically, they could just stay in the van until he was too drained to keep them here. If they tried that, he’d have to go out and confront them. Not something he wanted to do, but if it became necessary…

Lewis wondered why he was being affected in the first place. He wasn’t evil…Well, okay, he did want to kill Arthur. That was justified, but maybe it was gray enough for Sydney’s ability to categorize him as malevolent. If that was the case, then it would probably stop after he killed Arthur and no longer had any desire to hurt someone.

Lewis was dragged from his musings as several figures started exiting the van. Finally! Lewis quickly started setting up the finishing touches of his plan.

It was time to end this.

Arthur had to admit defeat. “I’ll need to look under the hood, and I don’t want to do that in front of a haunted mansion.” He sighed. “I don’t wanna go inside either.”

Sydney had been staring at the mansion the whole time. She could see the music. And anger. This eye was so weird. “I think you’d be okay. Pretty sure my aura will reach that far.”

Mystery could confirm that her aura did extend that far and would retain enough potency to be effective. Not that he could tell them, but it was certainly a weight off his shoulders.

Vivi started handing out various items for protection and fighting. “It’s a tough choice. Stay out here alone but relatively safe or go inside with us to stay close to Sydney and me.”

Arthur groaned. If he was less worried about the girls’ safety he would stay outside, but he couldn’t help but worry that if he let them go inside that he would never see them again. It had happened before. Even if he couldn’t do anything to protect them, he could draw fire away from them.

“I think I’ll go with you guys,” Arthur decided.

Sydney and Vivi studied him for a moment before Sydney suddenly bit her thumb and smeared some blood in the center of his forehead. “Just in case.”

Arthur instinctively looked up with crossed eyes for a moment. “Uh. Okay. I guess that’ll work.”

“It should. There is power in blood,” said Vivi as she gave him some holy water and slipped a beaded necklace over his head and under his shirt. “We can try practicing making protective symbols with it too.”

Sydney chuckled. “Like an anime.” She nodded. “Anything that you think will help.”

Arthur fought down the urge to wipe at the blood on his forehead. “Can I just say that I don’t like having other people’s blood on me?” It brought back bad memories.

Sydney winced. “Oh. Sorry. Should’ve asked first, shouldn’t I?”

Arthur took a deep breath. “I’m fine. I’ll be fine. You said it might help so it’s something to try.” The blood itched on his forehead. “But I am totally scrubbing it off when we get out of here.”

Vivi nodded. “Sounds like a decent enough compromise.” She handed an ofuda to Sydney. Sydney smeared some more blood on the back of it. “I don’t want either of you getting hurt again. You’re just starting to get back to where you were before.”

That made both of them wince. The last few months of learning to live with new handicaps had been difficult and frustrating in several ways. They didn’t want a repeat with themselves or Vivi or Mystery.

All four of them silently vowed to protect the others.

The walk up to the mansion’s front door took just a few seconds. Vivi knocked on the doors (She was concerned that the inhabitants would be excited by Arthur knocking and see Sydney knocking as a declaration of war.), which creaked open ominously. The inched in, the doors slamming shut behind them.

The darkness didn’t last long enough for them to pull out flashlights. Several purple wisps of fire floated by and lit candles lined along the walls and set on a chandelier.

Vivi absently noted that the layout kind of reminded her of the Spencer mansion, except a lot more purple.

“Sydney, stop humming.”

“Oops. Didn’t notice-”

Several purple ghosts suddenly popped up. “Who-o-o-o-oa!”

Most of the group immediately tensed up. Vivi didn’t immediately though. “Cute!”

They really were adorable…until more popped up behind them. “This time I might just disa-Who-o-o-o-who-o-o-oa!” They suddenly got pointy toothed with claws. “Oh yeah!”

Nope. They took off running down the hallway through break in the ghosts.

“This time I might just disappear!”

A suit of armor suddenly lunged towards them and swung an ax. Sydney and Vivi dove under the ax. Arthur vaulted over it. Mystery barely dodged it, having to use his kitsune magic to retract his head into his body.

“Gah!”

“Mystery!”

“)%$*&$^#$(%^)*%(&%*&$&!”

Mystery popped his head back out before any uncomfortable questions could be asked.

“Who-o-o-o-who-o-o-oa…”

They abruptly realized that the paintings lining the hall were moving. They suddenly leapt out. “Oh yeah!”

The Mystery Skulls leapt into each other’s arms. Thankfully, the portrait spirits pulled back into the paintings. “Who-o-o-o-oa…” And then the lady painting reached out and pulled a rope next to her painting.

A trapdoor opened under them. They fell down screaming, and things became bizarre, even by their standards. They weren’t falling as quickly as they should be. It was more like they were floating. Not to mention there were several random items in the space with them. A few hours later, they would comment on how it was oddly reminiscent of Alice in Wonderland.

They floated past several mirrors. Vivi was a bit confused by the fact that her reflection had completely purple eyes. From what Mystery could see in his cracked mirror they could see past glamours. Arthur was facing away from the mirrors so he didn’t see that they failed to reflect his prosthetic. Sydney did faintly notice this but was a bit distracted by how her reflection showed her right after her injury with her remaining eye leaking various colors from it.

Then Arthur’s fall suddenly sped up. Vivi and Sydney made to grab him, but just missed him. Then they noticed Sydney was falling even slower and tried to grab each other, but it was too late again.

Sydney let out an ‘oof’ and shot to her feet as she landed. “I’m armed!” she shouted, brandishing the ofuda. She turned around. There were a bunch of boxes, a dusty bed with no covers, and… a mannequin in a wedding dress and holding an ax? Sydney thought she was in the basement until she noticed some windows that she ran over to. She felt her brain short circuit. “How the *&^*) do you fall down into the attic?!”

Vivi and Mystery had landed in a kitchen where a pair of dagwood sandwiches were laid out on the center counter. The two stared at them for several moments but managed to pull themselves away. “Right. Separated…We should look for Arthur first. Sydney can take care of herself in this sort of situation.” Her stomach growled. Mystery’s growled even louder. “…I wonder if it would be safe to grab a few pieces.”

Arthur landed on his ass in what was probably the basement. He absentmindedly glanced upward in confusion (How did that work? Ghost logic was so weird.) before zeroing in on a large coffin with a skull and thorny vine design on the top of the lid. It was beating like the rest of the house.

Not good.

The coffin slowly opened, revealing a jawless skull floating above a large body in a nice suit.

Lewis narrowed his eye sockets as he floated out and slammed his feet in front of Arthur. He glared at his murderer, full of hate and anger.

Arthur stared in fear, unable to recognize his dead friend. All he saw was a scary, probably powerful, likely dangerous ghost that had separated him from his friends.

Lewis broke the silence by pointing a finger at Arthur. “Fuck, it’s you I hate the most.”

Arthur gulped and pointed at himself. “Buh-buh-Why?”

It was a reasonable question from Arthur’s point of view. Lewis…it did occur to him that he wasn’t as recognizable without his face. He lit the braziers and let his hair form. “Does this answer your question?!”

No, it didn’t, but Arthur decided he wasn’t going to explain that this was a case of mistaken identity to a ghost that probably wasn’t going to listen. He threw the vial of holy water, turned on his heel, and ran.

Lewis did recoil a bit at the holy water. He was a fire ghost. Water stung even if it wasn’t holy. Then he threw it off, decided this was proof of Arthur’s guilt, and gave chase.

Arthur was in good shape (He didn’t understand how he was still so healthy when he’d been hospitalized and locked in his workroom so much for the last few months.) and used to running from scary things. He glanced behind him and saw the ghost practically flying towards him. No more glancing back. He put on a burst of speed.

Oh, hey, Vivi and Mystery. “Angry ghost! Run!”

Vivi and Mystery looked away from the sandwiches they were still debating eating. They looked in the direction Arthur came from, threw the sandwiches at the angry ghost, and ran after Arthur. Lewis didn’t bother trying to avoid the sandwich contents and flew right through them.

“We need to find Sydney!” shouted Vivi.

“Where is she?!” shouted Arthur.

“I don’t know!”

Mystery could feel that Sydney had ended up in the attic and was managing to work her way down. He pulled ahead and ran up some stairs, Arthur and Vivi close behind him. They ran through a bunch of doors and rooms.

Sydney heard the racket and threw open the door of the room she’d wandered into. “Angry Elvis ghost!”

That threw Lewis for a loop. “Elvis? Are you kid-” He saw the eyepatch. “What happened to your-”

Sydney threw an ofuda at him. Lewis yelped and pulled it off. That hurt!

“You stay away from Arthur!” demanded Sydney.

That hurt almost as much as the ofuda. “You don’t get it. He-”

Vivi darted back and grabbed Sydney. “What’re you waiting for?!” She then dragged Sydney off.

Okay, Vivi and Sydney didn’t know about his murder. Somehow. Maybe it was post traumatic amnesia or something. Clearly, this needed to be remedied. Also, why was Sydney wearing an eyepatch? She wasn’t wearing an eyepatch for the heck of it. There’d been scars peeking out. He gave chase, now equally intent on telling Vivi and Sydney what happened along with killing Arthur.

He threw fire to keep Arthur from moving down a hallway. Arthur turned and stared at him fearfully. Lewis felt his desire for vengeance clawing up his heart.

And then Vivi and Sydney put themselves between them, Vivi with her arms outstretched as if to shield Arthur as much as possible, Sydney with her hands up as if she was prepared to fight him.

This was wrong. Vivi and Sydney were supposed to be on his side. He wasn’t the enemy! He just needed…Maybe…Yes. That would work. He willed his anchor towards them.

They just needed to see the proof of who he was, that they knew him.

The flames died down. Arthur was certain he knew the way to the front door from this spot. He grabbed Vivi and Sydney and booked it.

Vivi and Sydney glanced back once.

Mystery made sure to take up the rear.

Lewis stared in disbelief and heartbreak as his murderer and the love(s?) of his life and (more than) best friend.

And his anchor fell and broke.

And Lewis switched to frustration and anger and despair and why did this happen to him?! Why why why?!

He screamed, pouring his everything into it as his fire erupted around him.

The living Mystery Skulls barely made it through the doors in time to avoid being burned alive. Mystery might have had something to do with it. They rushed to the van. “Go go go!”

Arthur revved the van. It started. “I’m going!”

They peeled out of there.

None of them saw the figure watching them from one of the high windows. Lewis watched as the van drove away. He pressed down on his cracked anchor and looked at the picture inside.

It was from shortly after he and Vivi started dating. He had an arm around Vivi, who was hugging him. Sydney had an arm thrown over his shoulder while he used his free arm to support her. No Arthur. The three of them were smiling and happy and whole and alive.

They could never go back to that.

Lewis barely noticed the tear running down his face as he finally passed out and returned to his anchor, the house fading around him.

#MSA + 1 #msa+1 #Mystery #Vivi #Arthur #Lewis #Ghost #mystery skulls #extra member #au #grrlpowercomic au #What am I getting into?

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yogaadvise · 6 years

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How Embracing Struggle Can Help You Find Success

It's easy to check out people we consider effective as well as visualize a neatly packaged tale regarding their lives. Even after reviewing their intense difficulties, we could imagine that as soon as first barriers disappear, they browse easily on an endless wave of pleasure as well as objective fulfillment. Cinderella tales have been informed and also retold for centuries, all the while with a fairy godmother eliminating hardship with a simple flick of her stick, and also constantly finishing with a 'gladly ever after.' If charted on a chart, we 'd see the smooth 'happily ever after' line relocate up toward the skies without the least dip. That kind of regular direct progression has yet to be mathematically discovered in anything, let alone in individual achievement of a goal. Once we have actually established just what success implies for ourselves, how can we craft and find charm within the ups and downs of the journey?

When we take a look at ourselves, it's usually simple to locate fault with our instant condition. In regards to goal gratification, the unique you set out to compose may have quit moving 3 months earlier just except page 20. The workout routine you prepared to do each early morning is currently more difficult to awaken for in the chilly cold weather. The ingredients for the juice bar you ultimately committed to opening up expense a lot a lot more compared to anticipated. The line graph of your life may appear like a collection of dips, plateaus, as well as spikes-far various from that of the even-keeled, grinning, surfing Cinderella. The tiny as well as huge challenges existing in our own trajectories can lead us to think, occasionally unconsciously, that something is 'incorrect.' Even worse yet, this sort of thinking could keep us from proceeded effort toward an objective. Embracing struggle as component of the path rather of an unplanned blockage to the course is key.

Believing that some individuals have the excellent skills or situations for success and also that other individuals do not is referred to as 'fixed state of mind'- a term created by Carolyn Dweck, Ph.D., a researcher and also professor of psychology at Stanford College. Proof of a repaired attitude is found in expressions we all could connect to: 'I'm simply bad at writing,' or 'I've never ever had much of a company feeling.' In the last decade, Dweck has actually shed light on the absence of scientific basis for repaired, pre-determined learning capability. An expanding movement in the education and learning sphere is educating kids to welcome a research-based 'development mindset' from a very early age-that in everything we start, there is a finding out curve as well as efficient battle for all, no matter starting factor. Our intelligence is malleable, and with duplicated dedication to a task or dream, the form of our minds actually shifts in terms of structure and in feature in order to help boost efficiency as well as effectiveness-what is understood as neural plasticity or neuroplasticity.

We see examples of neuroplasticity in yoga exercise. The very first time you move right into a Warrior II pose you may locate you're even more reliant on teacher signs as well as see that your mind and body are hesitant to conform. With also simply a few instances of method, your back toes may find themselves directing internal and your shoulders blades attracting down your back in the pose on their own. That beginning unfamiliarity and learned crispness of any ability, principle, or behavior per se exhibits the plastic, ever-changing nature of the brain.

These unscientific encounters are usual, yet exactly how does neuroplasticity in fact job and also why does it matter? With repeated exposure or practice of a principle of an ability, your brain mold and mildews itself in either or both physical structure as well as function. Examined with magnetic vibration imaging (MRI), architectural modifications are all-natural alterations to your brain composition. Useful magnetic vibration imaging (fMRI) is a popular technique of examining brain networks by determining oxygenated blood circulation patterns in the mind as a subject participates in a certain task. A study released in 2000 by Eleanor Maguire, Ph.D., a neuroscientist at the University London, shows that certified London cab driver had proportionately bigger posterior hippocampi, the mind area heavily involved in spatial depiction or environmental mapping, as compared to a control team that did not have phenomenal experience navigating via roadways. What's indicated is that the mind structurally adjusts itself based on method that we purposely (or even automatically) choose to commit to. It's a message that encourages us to bear in mind that even without a fairy godmother, we have much more control over our knowing and goal attainment compared to we may think.

Once we determine exactly what personal success looks like, how do we work to efficiently fulfill a goal? Here are few actions:

1. Offer yourself reflective area to determine your purpose. 'Success' is about the individual. Offering on your own pockets of time to reflect aids you launch a relationship with yourself and guarantee your objective is really yours and also no one else's. Learn more regarding exactly how to harness the power of reflection to reach your complete potential.

2. Expect and embrace the bumps. Once you've crafted your objective, take comfort in knowing that as difficult as they could be, ups and also downs are regular throughout the process and could even offer us with helpful insight. In 1979, Suzanne Kobasa, Ph.D., spearheaded the principle of 'strength' as a means to stop detrimental results of tension, among the significant elements being perception of challenges as anticipated learning opportunities as opposed to inhibitions. If perfectionism is holding you back from trying, take into consideration fabulous basketball gamer Michael Jordan's representation on why 'gladly ever before after' is a myth: 'I have actually missed greater than 9,000 shots in my job. I've shed almost 300 games. 26 times, I've been depended take the game winning shot and missed out on. I have actually failed over and over and also over once again in my life. And that is why I succeed.'

3. Make positivity a practice. We understand that the mind materializes based on our habits, for much better or for worse. So as much as we should prepare for the dips, we should likewise enter into the routine of positively recognizing our little yet considerable victories along the road: You reopened your writing documents and also began to reread your unique introduction. You shifted your chilly early morning exercises to the night after you're already outdoors. You called alternating produce companies to assist take care of prices in your juice bar business. While these activities might look like small droplets, without each of these iterative motions, the oceanic vision would certainly never become. Keep in mind to offer yourself props for your initiatives and also for being where you are right below as well as now.

#kundalini yoga #yoga

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peonyoak81 · 3 years

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Physical Fitness For Your Way Of Living.

Way Of Life Health And Wellness & Physical Fitness Collection.

Content

Group Exercise.

Essential Educating Variables.

Pilates Vs Yoga: The Differences And What'S Right For You.

Just How Do I Produce My Own Workout Plan?

Slope Strolling Vs Running.

Noom.

Team Workout.

Nonetheless, the adverse impacts of adding harmful active ingredients like artificial lotion as well as sugar surpass these favorable results. However, commercially made pizzas also occur to be really undesirable.

Crucial Educating Variables.

They're located in some margarines and also spreads as well as likewise frequently contributed to packaged foods, but many food producers have actually stopped utilizing them. Though losing 20 extra pounds can feel like a major difficulty, it can be done rapidly and safely by making a couple of straightforward adjustments to your diet plan and way of life. Strolling, running, leaping rope, rowing and also boxing are some simple and satisfying cardio workouts that can amp up weight-loss. Cardio, also called cardiovascular exercise, is a type of physical activity that enhances your heart price and helps enhance your heart and lungs. Staying responsible to your weight loss objectives is key to long-lasting success.

If you implement a handful of these pointers, you'll be well on your method to your weight reduction goals. Whey protein is readily available at the majority of health stores and also online. If you experience subduing cravings and also can not appear to curb your eating despite exactly how tough you try, you may suffer from dependency. Studies reveal that inadequate rest is one of the best risk variables for obesity, as it's connected to an 89% enhanced risk of obesity in children as well as 55% in adults.

Obtaining sufficient exercise is additionally an important consider keeping your digestive tract habits regular. You might see that you poop more frequently when you start an exercise routine.

Pilates Vs Yoga: The Distinctions And Also What'S Right For You.

If a customer purchases a little training bundle of 4 or 6 sessions, you will get paid much more per hr, yet you will certainly need to work tougher after just a couple weeks to encourage them to get once again.

Think about providing workout and also meal plans that have been customized to your clients' one-of-a-kind needs and also fitness goals.

Fitness centers have a tendency to offer members a reduced rate per session if they buy a huge package, know that this might impact your hourly rate by a few bucks.

Big bundles of 24 or 36 sessions are fantastic, due to the fact that you understand you have that customer hooked for a number of weeks.

You have actually confirmed yourself enough that your credibility and also organization are based on recommendations.

When you have actually brought in clients, your per hour income will be established by the sort of plan they purchase from you.

Think about signing up with personal trainer online forums or LinkedIn health and fitness groups, so you can discover what methods have helped others.

In addition, the diet regimen includes a brew called "wonder soup," which is an appetizing, low-calorie veggie soup having cabbage, tomatoes, celery, pepper, and carrots. Individuals can consume marvel soup as a treat to suppress hunger pains till their following dish. Unsaturated fats, such as those in salmon, avocados, and walnuts, aid improve cholesterol as well as likewise supply various other health advantages. Efficiently adopting some or every one of the techniques and way of living goals gone over in this write-up will absolutely aid you shed the extra pounds around your midsection. You can find 5 free apps/websites to track nutrient as well as calorie consumption on this web page.

How Do I Develop My Own Workout Plan?

Consuming water with dishes can likewise maintain you really feeling full, decreasing your appetite and consumption. According to one research in 14 adults, consuming alcohol 16.9 fluid ounces of water boosted metabolism by 30% after 30-- 40 mins.

Incline Walking Vs Running.

Fortunately, making use of a mix of proven strategies can streamline and also accelerate fat burning. Fiber can also be a lifesaver when you're diet programs and trying to resist yearnings. Fiber is a plant-based nutrient that the body can not absorb.

This indicates that a glass of orange juice won't have the very same results on fullness as an orange, making it very easy to take in large amounts in a short amount of time. Also, fruit juice generally has no fiber and doesn't need chewing. If you are yearning a treat, eat a piece of fruit or a handful of nuts instead.

Like coffee, green tea also has several advantages, one of them being weight reduction. Any type of resource of high quality healthy protein for morning meal must do the trick.

A simple weight lifting regimen will be adequate, also if it doesn't press you to the restriction and leave you out of breath. It's well worth following this up with a casein shake; as pointed out previously this will guarantee regular muscle mass recovery throughout the evening while you rest. Eat bananas either whole or in a smoothie mix with milk as well as ice. No other fruits or veggies are enabled, yet individuals can likewise consume wonder soup.

Exercises like high-knee operating, butt kicks, and also mountain climbers call for limited room. If you're at home and don't have health club tools, you can still do high-calorie-burning workouts. If your physician hasn't suggested a 500-calorie diet regimen, you should not attempt this diet regimen. A diet regimen similar to this has risks and safety measures associated with it. This diet regimen can be hazardous and needs medical supervision.

https://rangegreece51.werite.net/post/2020/12/11/Fitness-Trainer-Or-Instructor-Profession-Account. -boosting impacts of fiber might create huge benefits in regards to weight control. Resistance training is a type of workout that involves antagonizing a force to increase muscle mass stamina as well as endurance. To begin, merely switch out refined grains in pastas, white breads, cereals and also pre-packaged products for healthy, whole-grain options such as couscous, quinoa, wild rice or barley. What's even more, they typically have a high glycemic index, which suggests that they are digested and also taken in rapidly. Fast food digestion causes spikes and accidents in blood sugar levels, followed by raised hunger.

If you're mosting likely to consume carbs, ensure to eat them with their natural fiber. Research studies show that sugar (and also high-fructose corn syrup) consumption is highly related to an increased risk of weight problems, along with conditions including kind 2 diabetes as well as heart disease. In addition, it might lower the loss of muscle mass commonly connected with low-calorie diet plans. Nevertheless, higher-quality studies are needed before any stronger insurance claims can be made. Though eco-friendly tea contains percentages of caffeine, it is loaded with powerful antioxidants called catechins, which are believed to work synergistically with high levels of caffeine to boost weight loss.

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Note that this does not mean that you must include this fat to your diet plan, however simply change several of your other fat sources with coconut oil. Utilizing smaller sized plates lowers how much food you eat, while providing you the perception of having actually eaten much more. Periodic fasting is an eating pattern that cycles between periods of fasting and eating.

Studies show that individuals who eat vegetables and fruits often tend to consider much less. The best method to prevent this is to do some sort of resistance workout such as lifting weights. Studies show that weight lifting can assist maintain your metabolism high and also avoid you from losing precious muscle mass.

Continue reading to find out more regarding the risks as well as goals of the 500-calorie diet. " You recognize, you have actually reached in fact use up that or cut down on your consumption. As well as it takes longer than overnight to do that," he said. Apovian, that is also the director of scientific research study at the Weight problems Research Center of Boston Medical Facility, claimed workout is not required for individuals of this strategy.

As an example, if you have kind 1 diabetes, you'll need to monitor your blood sugar levels during as well as after workout. Jumping jacks are a standard cardio workout that elevates your heart rate. You do not require much space to do jumping jacks, so it's easy to do in your home. The HIIT bodyweight exercises listed above can be done in the house.

They may likewise have artificial trans fats, which are extremely harmful and also connected to several illness. Pastries, cookies and cakes are loaded with harmful components like added sugar and also fine-tuned flour.

Noom.

Here are 26 weight-loss ideas that are actually evidence-based. Therefore, if you clean or use mouthwash after eating, you might be be much less attracted to grab an unneeded snack. Research studies have revealed that sleep-deprived people depend on 55% more likely to end up being overweight, contrasted to those who obtain sufficient sleep. Of all the probiotic microorganisms, Lactobacillus gasseri reveals the most promising results on weight loss. Fitness Training UK have revealed that overweight and obese individuals have a tendency to have various digestive tract germs than normal-weight individuals, which might influence weight.

The main nutritional resources of polished carbohydrates are white flour, white bread, white rice, soft drinks, pastries, snacks, desserts, pasta, morning meal grains, and sugarcoated. Glucomannan is just one of numerous weight management pills that has actually been shown to work. There are likewise several healthy as well as natural treats that are easy to prepare as well as take with you on the move. There is a great deal of poor fat burning details on the internet.

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