#and said we all treat her so badly and none of us care about her which cannot be further from the truth

[whydoifeelthisquiet]

..

#slight tw for the next few tags………… #my sister emotionally and verbally abused me last night and I don’t use those terms lightly at all #basically I texted my mom ‘yikes’ yesterday after she was being rude to us and she found it and started screaming #and said we all treat her so badly and none of us care about her which cannot be further from the truth #the gaslighting was out of this world #she said we started it? #my mom and I were both crying #she called me all kinds of awful names and kept saying fuck you so I said fuck you back #I have an anxiety around swearing out loud so the car fell silent #then she kept screaming #and I was sobbing and it ruined my makeup #then I had a panic attack #she got out of the car and then we had to go in fucking margaritaville resort to have a dinner w family we don’t see #she thought she was entitled to this outburst. #and I cried silently the whole way home and my pain was so bad on top of it #and now she’s acting like nothing happened. I did not get any apology. #it was HELL #and I just need to rant #I love her but…I did not deserve this #also slightly pissed at my mom bc she told my sister something I said that was supposed to be kept private #and my sister used it against me #sorry I needed to rant ❤️‍🩹 #Abby doesnt shut up

[lains-reality]

Once a young woman came to Hafiz and said, “What is the sign of someone knowing God?” And Hafiz became very quiet and stood in silence for nearly a minute. Lovingly looking deep into the young woman's eyes, he then softly spoke: “My dear, they have dropped the knife. The person who knows God has dropped the cruel knife so often used upon their tender self and others.”[source]

please give yourself the grace of forgetting, of being sad, of failing, of fearing. you are allowed to. all is Self. you are okay now and here.

allow yourself to look at the insecurities, shame, guilt and fears.

give yourself the chance to respond, not react.

let vanessa be. vanessa is just a person like anyone else. thinks they are born and will die. every vanessa, no matter how well off they are, is scared shitless. but you treat your vanessa so badly.

you hate it. you want it gone. you see the body and mind as a cage without a key. it hurts. you curse it and nothing changes. you try to convince it and nothing changes. you curse it more.

It is not a matter of enduring, it is a matter of you being so crude to Vanessa, and expecting so much of her when she has no power. Do you feel the same way about the homeless man on the street corner? Do you constantly chastise him in your head, blame him for his circumstances? Even if you are the kind of person to judge based on appearances, you do for a moment and move on with your life. That's because you never thought he was you so how could you feel pain on his behalf? You may do the opposite and feel bad for his situation for a bit, but you still leave the matter alone as he's none of your business and you have your own things to worry about. - post source

vanessa is doing the best it can. it sings, dances, loves! it bleeds, it shudders, it hurts. all is the wide expression of Self.

and yet you hide from the pain, from the hurt, from the thoughts, the feelings. this is not the fullness of Self.

forgive yourself. let go of the shame and guilt. stop shaming vanessa for exsiting just like any other person in the street. stop carrying all responsibilities of the world. it's already taken care of.

you breathe with no help, you shit with no help, you eat with no help, you sleep with no help. and even if you do need help, the inability to do so, happens without your help. your amazon package comes through, your sibling grows 2 cm, the sun rises and falls, the seasons pass by. all by itself. what's orchestrating it all? Self. what other reason have we given ourself the world, other than out of love?

Leave poor Vanessa alone and stop assigning her the responsibility and accountability of everything that the dream shows. The entire dream is all an expression of the Infinite Being, not hers (the ego) which she is just one more creation of. And it doesn't have to be your (the Self's/I AM's) dream anymore when you stop identifying with it. - post source

its already out of vanessa's hands. vanessa can't do anything. let that be a celebration: all is taken care of. unconditonally.

"why is it all taken care of?"

"why not!"

"but why should *i* get the world?"

"why not?"

"but-"

its already all here for you. its already as it is. what is vanessa gonna do to change the infinte? why would the infinite need changing anyway?

Treat it with compassion, stop bullying it, it's not its fault you're not where you should be. You think he's in the way so you get mad, you get frustrated it's not following instructions or refuses to step aside. But the ego is not the problem, nor in the way. Your attitude toward it is the problem. Let it be, it doesn't know any better! - post source

give yourself the permission to exist as you are. give yourself permission to be as you are, right now. start asking 'did i give permission for this?' you'll find how much stuff is not even your choice. as ada said its just tolerance and endurance of the forced vanessa.

now you realise you don't have to be a forced vanessa. so you go completely the other direction and try to (forcefully) change the vanessa. you're still holding up standards, ideas & roles to yourself. the things that made you hate vanessa in the first place. just maybe, for this moment hold nothing. drop the knife.

“Stop trying to heal yourself, fix yourself, even awaken yourself. Let go of letting go. Stop trying to fast-forward the movie of your life. It gets so exhausting, doesn’t it, always trying to get there, chasing futures that never seem to arrive, living on second-hand promises. Instead, bow deeply to yourself as you actually are. Be here. Honour this present scene in the movie. Your pain, your sorrow, your doubts, your deepest longings, your fearful thoughts, are not mistakes, and they aren’t asking to be healed. They are asking to be held. Here, now, lightly, in the loving arms of present awareness…” — Jeff Foster

#lainsreality #nondualism #non dualism #LISTEN TO THE VIDEO #i swear i'm still on break #the first quotes source = video

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for defending my friend lying about his dog dying?

Cw for animal abuse and Is ableist language (using sociopath as synonym for bad person)

I was in a friend group of three. Me (24f) my best friend since age 7 (24m) and we have a mutual friend he met in college when he moved away and has known for a little over a year (23f). Callin' them Liam and Rory for ease. Liam had an Esa (not a service dog, an esa). His whole life has revolved around this dog since we were 16 and he moved away. He keeps a very strict schedule with this dog. We are all aware of it because he will leave group chats mid conversation to make sure "Buddy" gets walked or fed or whatever time it is. He takes really good care of this dog and hand-makes its meals and takes it to the vet every 2 months.

Few weeks ago he was acting weird but trying to cover it up. I had been meaning to ask what was going on more privately but I kinda dropped the ball because my aunt died suddenly.

Flash to a week ago Rory sent a huge wall of text to our group chat calling Liam a barrage of names like "sociopath". It turns out that his dog died but he'd been acting like everything was the same which is why he seemed off. She found out when she came onto his property to check on him and he had to "confess."

Shes upset at him for lying but I knew there was more going on. So I talked to him about it privately over the phone and he just shattered. He had no idea what to do or say because he thinks his dad killed Buddy but he doesn't have direct proof. I had never heard him cry before this, because he was raised to really keep that stuff close to his chest. He's tried to open up to me over the years but it's visibly difficult for him especially with how his father still treats him. I believe him because if he truly wanted to manipulate me I still do not think he would have let me see that. He kept apologizing and sounding really lost and ashamed so I really don't think it was an act, you can't fake that kind of helpless abused kid feeling.

I forgave him for keeping it from me because it was obvious he was going to tell us once he processed the situation because that's a lot to say the least. I explained what happened to Rory and said sure maybe it wasn't 100% in the right but he was obviously expiercing trauma and him acting like everything was fine wasn't about hurting us, and we knew something was wrong but didn't ask, she thinks he's trolling for sympathy and that if I forgive him it tells her everything she needs to know about what kind of person I am. And says if he really thinks he dad killed his dog he would have called the police.

There are several reasons he shouldn't call the police one being that his dad has always treated Laim really badly but we never thought he would kill a dog and my friend has to live with him because he's a broke college student. She said he should have figured that out on his own but instead he manipulated us and is now trying to make us feel bad that he got caught.

I also feel like he was in danger from his dad and if he told us Buddy was gone he'd have to say why and then he'd be lying to us anyway until he figured out what the hell happened or if it was safe to tell us. We don't have enough information so I just don't think it's fair to totally write him off as a bad person over what is obviously and extremely traumatic situation? Without even talking to him? She found out Buddy was dead, left and refused to speak to him before announcing her departure from the group and blocked him on everything and basically made me choose between her or him.

I told her that was a really heartless take and that she's over reacting and she told me if I wanted to be best friends with a sociopath that was none of her buisness but she wanted nothing to do with either us because I'm just as bad as him if I don't agree with her so she doesnt loose anything by cutting me off.

She really made me feel like I was helping Liam hide a body. So I'm wondering if she's right. I don't think I'll change my mind, I won't abandon him but I am willing to admit I was wrong if I am.

Am I the assshole for sticking by him?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

[mayasaura]

do you think the reason the second 69 reunion didn't go so well bc the sixth wanted her blood? like, we as readers know way more about the whole blood of Eden situation than kiriona did, and painted through the nona lense her hostility seems to come out of nowhere, but like...

she's been pushed around like a doll for like a half a year. and now here comes someone else trying to mess with her body without her permission again. this time, she can say no, and feel (dubiously) good about it.

couple this with the probablity that she only fully leaned into this cohort thing because she felt completely and utterly abandoned, and palamades clearly having usurped and fucked around with her new bestie - a tower Prince nonetheless, and was just talking about allying with rebel forces...

I think it was a mix of the aforementioned distate of having her body used without permission thus being used to compound her allegiance to her Father and Ianthe purely because they're the only people who will care about her now, one way or the other

I think it was a confluence of things that made that reunion go so badly, but it was the blood most of all.

Kiriona has already not had a good day. She thought for a moment that she was seeing Harrow again. Maybe she thought Harrow had come back for her, and was finally going to accept her offer. She wanted so badly for Harrow to want her. Then Nona kissed her, and told her she looked like she wanted it, and Pyrrha talked about her mother, none of which we have time to unpack right now.

So she's already been having pretty much the worst time when Palamedes calls her "it" and tries to take her blood, and she realises that's the only reason they came for her at all. It's Kiriona Gaia they're after, not Gideon the Ninth, so Kiriona Gaia is what they get.

I think it's even worse because of her history with Palamedes, and the conversation she overhears before he goes for her with the needle. He references Harrow opening the Tomb.

In Gideon the Ninth, when Gideon was at her lowest point, Palamedes was there for her. She told him a secret she'd been keeping for seven horrible years. It was like she'd opened up her chest and let him take a look inside her, and at the time he'd acted like he might even care. Like maybe that meant something.

And then he goes and references the secret she told him to a room full of people like it's something they all already know, before trying to harvest her body like a public resource. Look at it like that, and no wonder she's pissed with him.

I noticed that when she takes survey of who's in the room after she sits up, the only one she has a kind word for is Corona. And yeah yeah, very gay very in character: Corona is hot so she can stay, but everyone else should leave.

But Corona is also the only one who said words of mourning over Gideon's body, and treated her like a dead friend instead of a fetch quest item.

#the locked tomb #ntn spoilers #nona the ninth #kiriona gaia #palamedes sextus #tlt meta

[winchester-books]

Midsummers

based on- obx

characters- jj x reader

warnings- lang

w/c- 600

summary- jj would never be invited to midsummers and your parents would lose their minds if they knew you were dating a pogue, but he he’s never really cared much about what other people think

“We’ll, Y/N is quite the scholar, She’s top of her class at Kildare County High! She’s also on the varsity volleyball team and her brother is…”

You tuned your father out, smiling and nodding politely as he boasted about you and your younger brother.

You hated the kook lifestyle. Sure, you were grateful for what you had in life, but the attitudes of rich people made you sick.

Everything was a joke to them- even Midsummers. It was quite ironic that Midsummer’s was an event to raise money for charity; but between the outfits attendees put together, and the money it cost to actually put on the event, it had to be at least triple what they were raising for charity.

These gatherings where just an excuse for kooks to get drunk and gloat about their wealth.

Your eyes scanned the crowds of people, wishing nothing more to be spending time with JJ and the other pogues than this bullshit party. You gave your father and the people he was speaking to a small smile, taking your chance to slip away before they started asking you questions.

You winced, tugging at your dress that was becoming more and more uncomfortable. God I hate this.

You nearly let out a yelp when your body collided with someone else, “Oh my- I’m so sor-” you stopped mid sentence looking up to see none other than JJ with a shit eating grin plastered across his face.

“JJ what the hell are you doing here?” You whispered through your teeth, glancing around in fear of your parents seeing.

He nodded in the direction of Sarah Cameron who was walking out of the party, clearly on some form of mission. “Had to deliver a message to John B’s new lover,” he joked with a shrug. He placed his hands on your shoulders, his smile getting impossibly bigger as he admired you, “Plus… I had to come see my Kook Princess on the big night-”

You frowned at the nickname, “Don’t call me that.”

JJ smirked, reaching forward and tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, “You’re not like the rest of these assholes, i just like messing with you,” he assured, “You look gorgeous,” his eyes trailed down your dress as he spoke.

Your face heated up with his words and you looked away for a second. You and JJ had been together for almost a year, but his words always made you blush.

“Let’s dance,” his hand slid down your arm and he laced his fingered in yours. He tilted his head, confused when you pulled him back and didn’t let him drag you onto the dance floor.

“We can’t,” you sighed, “My parents- hell, everyone here would lose it if they knew we were together-”

“I don’t care,” JJ squeezed your hand softly, “I only care about you, Y/N. Screw all these rich pricks, let’s piss them off,”

“J, my parents. I don’t want them to treat you badly.”

“Who cares? I don’t care what they think of me. We’ve been together for 6 months- 6 months and 16 days to be exact. They’re bound to find out about us eventually… I mean it’s Midsummers- this is where kook couples do that freaking weird “coming out” as a couple thing, right?” he flashed you a smile that you really couldn’t argue with.

You stiffled a laugh, shaking your head at JJ’s ridiculousness and letting him pull you out onto the dance floor. You could feel the eyes of everyone around you and could hear the whispers as people watched. But you didn’t care, you had JJ, and you didn’t like any of these people anyways.

JJ spun you around, dipping you and making you laugh, “You can dance?”

JJ shrugged, effortlessly keeping up with your waltz, “What can I say, I’m a Jack of All Trades,” he grinned, spinning you around one more time and placing a kiss to your cheek.

“Maybank?”

Rafe was far away, but his voice rang out clearly across the party.

“Shit,” you and JJ said at the same time.

You could see JJ contemplating whether a fight was worth it or not, then your eyes flicked over to Rafe pushing his was through people towards JJ.

“You better go,” you whispered, squeezing his hand, “I think we gave them enough to talk about tonight- save the fight for another night,” you joked, smiling up at him.

JJ hummed in agreement, looking down at you with his fat grin still splayed across his face, “It was a pleasure,” he dramatically bowed in front of you, placing a kiss on the top of your hand before hurrying out of the party, Rafe still yelling after him.

#outer banks #outer banks imagine #obx #jj maybank x reader #outer banks x reader #jj maybank #jj imagine #jj maybank fluff #jj maybank imagine #jj x reader

[karizard-ao3]

Hi Karizard! Just finished reading Clueless Teens in like … two sittings - it’s legit the best school caste au fic I’ve come across, i love it so much. I know Eremika is the main focus but holy shit ur Aruani is! So sweet! 😭 Would you ever consider writing more Aruani stuff in the future?

Aw, thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it! I tend to include Aruani as a side ship in my longer fics. They feature in Anamnesis but I didn't tag them as a ship because they do not have a happy ending together and it's pretty much just solid angst between them throughout lol.

I'm still working on finishing my single parents au wip, but Aruani are the other couple in it. They, of course, don't show up as much as Eremika, but they are in it and they deal with changes to their relationship due to becoming new parents.

I'm going to share a little snippet, as a treat (also, I'm chomping at the bit to get this finished and posted, so I want very badly to share scenes and whatnot).

Here, Armin and Annie bring their baby on his first outing, meeting up with Eren, Mikasa, and their kids at the playground.

BEGIN SCENE!

Annie made sure Alexander was secure in his sling while Armin grabbed the diaper bag and slung it over his shoulder. 

"Is he okay in there?" he fretted. "You're sure he won't fall out or smother?"

"Maybe the sling wasn't a good idea…" said Annie, looking up at the other families occupying the playground near Eren and Mikasa’s houses. "Maybe bringing him out at all wasn't a good idea…" 

She bit her lip and glanced over towards where Eren and Mikasa were watching their kids play. Mason was running back and forth across the play structure’s bridge, doing spin kicks at each landing, while Adriana squealed and hollered because Eren was wiping her nose when she wanted to play. She had been a snotty, coughing mess all morning, he’d warned them, adding, “But don’t worry. The doctor said she’s not contagious, just gross.”

So maybe Adri wasn't an infection risk, but what about all these other kids? Annie held Alexander protectively against her body. He made a grunting sound, bobbing his fists and looking up at her. She glanced down at him just in time to see his face screw up and relax as he farted. Her heart swelled. "We're going to bring you home so none of these rowdy little shits can get you sick," she cooed. 

Alexander grunted again, not comprehending but pleased to be part of the conversation.

"Armin, we're going," said Annie.

"Sounds good!" said Armin, opening the car door he had just closed and stowing the diaper bag back inside.

Across the park lawn, Mikasa smacked Eren's arm and pointed at them.

"Ope!" he said, setting Adri free and jogging across the grass to the Arlerts. "Don't even think about it!" he said, stopping next to them. "You told us you were going crazy stuck at home. Now that the baby has his shots and it’s warming up, it's time for you two to get out of the house. He’ll be fine. You don’t need to keep him in a bubble."

"Look," said Armin. "I know it probably seems like we're being excessive to you, but you don't know what it's like having a child with medical issues."

Eren gaped at him. “Seriously?”

"What?" said Armin. "You don't."

"My kid literally can't breathe without daily steroids and gets bronchitis multiple times a year," said Eren, his eyebrows dropping into a dangerous line across his face. "What is Alexander's chronic illness?"

Armin averted his eyes. 

"Sorry. I didn't hear you. What was it again?" said Eren. He was in a far worse mood than usual.

"Nothing," grumbled Armin. "The doctor gave him a clean bill of health.”

“Oh!” said Eren. “How interesting!” 

“But his immune system is still immature so we have to be careful with him,” Armin persisted.

Eren held up his hands. "Fine. But if you keep sheltering him from everything like this, Alexander is going to turn out like you," he warned.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Armin demanded. "My parents did a great job!"

Annie reached past him to open the car door and get the diaper bag back out. “I guess a little fresh air and sunshine wouldn’t hurt.”

Armin turned to look at her, the betrayal evident all over his face. 

"I love you so much, baby," she said. "Just the way you are."

"That's not really what it seems like right now!" said Armin.

"No, really!" said Annie. "You're so intelligent and handsome and talented!"

"But?" said Armin, folding his arms.

"No buts," said Annie, heading towards Mikasa. "It's just that my dad didn't coddle me at all and I'm much less…"

"Much less what?" said Armin, scowling and chasing after her.

"Um... Prissy," said Annie. 

“We are talking more about this at home,” said Armin.

“Yes, dear,” said Annie.

“Tan I see the baby?” Adri squealed as soon as she noticed the Arlerts had finally joined them, chugging down the play structure steps as fast as her little legs could carry her and wiping her snot on her pudgy wrist.

Annie closed her eyes, took a deep, stabilizing breath and kneeled down so Adri could see Alexander. 

“Hello little Aleskander!” Adri said, then sneezed in his face, spraying him in spit.

Alexander gasped, his eyes popping open wide and his arms flinging out to his sides. “Oh, god…” groaned Annie.

Armin glared at Eren.

“Sorry little guy! I promise she’s not contagious,” said Eren, snatching his backpack from the ground and pulling out a pack of wipes. Alexander’s fists were bopping a mile a minute. His run-in with Adri had been very exciting. Eren held out the pack of wipes for Annie and she extracted one, using it to clean her son’s face while he aired his grievances in a thin wail. He was no longer enjoying his grand adventure now that it included being subjected to torture. 

“He’s crying,” Mason observed, skipping toward them to see the new baby. “Maybe he’s hungry. Mom, can I have a snack?”

“Tan I have one, too?” said Adri.

“I might have something,” said Mikasa. She hadn’t packed anything besides her and Mason’s lunches because they were going to be eating so soon but she might have a bag of chips or a protein bar in her purse that the kids could split.

“I’ll give Aleskander his bottle,” Adri said, putting her hands on her hips and inspecting the baby with an officious nod. “I’s going to take very good care of him.”

Mason grabbed his hair. “You know what? I can’t take it anymore, Adriana!” he shouted. “It’s I’m! Not I’s! You are saying it wrong! You say everything wrong! How can you be so dumb?”

"Mason!" said Mikasa.

Adriana’s face twisted with rage and she punched him.

“Ow!” Mason yelped. “She hit me!”

“Adriana May Jaeger!” Eren barked.

“I think she gave me internal bleeding,” Mason moaned, doubling over and clutching his stomach.

“He said I’s dumb!” Adriana howled.

“I’m,” Mason screeched. “You’re supposed to say I’m! Did you learn to talk at upside-down school?”

“I’s! Too! Little! For! Stool!” Adriana shrieked, punching him again.

“My organs!” Mason wailed.

“Kids with busted organs don’t get to play at the playground,” said Mikasa, sifting through her giant bag with greater urgency. Maybe if their mouths were occupied with chewing, the kids would stop screaming at each other. “Kids with busted organs have to go to the hospital.”

Mason eyed her, then straightened with theatrical uncertainty, patting his abdomen. “Hey! It doesn’t hurt anymore! ” he said as if he were as shocked by the news as any of them. “I’m okay!”

“A miracle,” said Mikasa.

END SCENE!

#ask me things #my asks #answered asks #armin arlert #annie leonhart #aruani #eren jaeger #mikasa ackerman #eremika #single parents au #writing wip #fic wip #fic writing #sneak peek #wip scene #rough draft #current wip

[violetrainbow412-blog]

Eddie the Banished

Eddie Munson x Byers!fem reader

Word count: 6k

Summary: Eddie helps you have a great time with your little brothe

Part 2 Part 3

A/N: this idea had been in my mind for a long time, because I love Will and I hate how his friends treat him, lol

There's no Vecna incident here at all, it's just the Byers going on vacation back to Hawkins.

You were still looking toward the entrance with slight nervousness, waiting for the night bus to arrive at Hawkins. Everything had been very difficult since the Starcourt mall fire and it had taken you a long time to find a decent rhythm of life again. Your mother, brothers, and your now new sister had gone to live in California, but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't leave your life in Indiana. Jonathan had no problem with changing schools, but for you it was very difficult; You were in charge of the literature club. And I mean, to a lot of people it might seem silly, but you'd been fighting hard for that position since you entered high school and you weren't about to give up. Besides, that same passion for writing had gotten you a job at the Hawkins Post (now without those awful men who mistreated Nancy so badly) and you couldn't deny that the pay was decent.

You don't even know how you convinced your mom, Joyce Byers herself, to let you stay in town for the rest of your year of high school.

Although she would never admit it out loud, Joyce took pride in you. From a very young age you had been independent, hardworking, and great support for her, so when you asked her to let you stay in the house, she couldn't say no. After all you were 18 years old and the sooner you got used to adult life the better it would be for you.

It was difficult, more than ever, because not only did you have to study, work and take care of the home, but also because now you were alone every day. It used to be comforting to come home and get a hug from your mom, fight a little with Jonathan, or watch movies with Will.

But hey, everyone had to grow up at some point and you were no exception.

“Y/N!” you heard in the distance You saw four people waving at you in the distance and almost fell on your face as you ran to meet them, completely excited.

"Will!" you laughed, looking at your little (not so little anymore) brother. He hugged you tightly as soon as he saw you and you reciprocated.

“I missed you so much” he confessed. You felt like you might cry at that, happy at the thought that, at least for a few days, you'd have your adventure partner back.

"I missed you more"

"Hello! Do you remember that you also have another brother?” Jonathan sneered from his place, annoyed that all your attention had gone to the minor. He wasn't going to admit it, but he had missed you too. You laughed and broke away from Will to punch your older brother in the shoulder, followed by a hug. Your mother saw the three of you with a smile and it didn't take long for you to surround her in a hug as well, now feeling a couple of tears slip down your cheeks.

"I'm so happy you're here" you exclaimed. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw a shy girl and noticed that it was none other than Eleven, who, like Will, had grown and changed too much. You also pulled her in for a hug and asked her if she minded being called her sister, to which she said no. She was happy to have a feminine figure like you in her life.

"Mike didn't come?" she dared to ask, with that tone that still sounded a little different.

"He promised to come to the house tomorrow to see us, today it's too late" you explained "And Nancy too" you added. Your two brothers smiled at that, after all he was supposed to be his best friend and his girlfriend who you were talking about "But well, we have to put the luggage in the car and go home"

“Do you have a car?” Will asked, quietly, a little surprised. You winked at him.

"It's my dear Steve's car, but don't tell Johnny I borrowed it from him" you laughed and he did the same. You walked next to your mother while carrying some bags and you smiled again when you realized that your family was indeed with you.

Finally your house would feel like a home again.

Frankly, Joyce was shocked when she got to the house. The house wasn’t remodeled, but there was no apparent damage either. It was still clean and tidy, with just a couple of your belongings. It didn't look like the place someone your age and on your salary would live, but in some extraordinary way you had made it work.

You agreed to let Eleven stay with you in the room, claiming that you could start getting along like sisters at last, and there was hardly any time to chat the night they arrived, as they were so tired that they went straight to sleep.

The next morning you found that your mother had gone down to the kitchen to prepare breakfast and you couldn't have been more grateful to her.

"So you have two jobs?" Jonathan asked once you sat down to eat breakfast at the table.

"That's right. Hawkins post in the afternoon and I'm a waitress at night. During the holidays I will also work in the mornings”

"And isn't it dangerous to work at night?" Joyce asked, to whom you had never told about this second job. Well, technically you had three jobs, but you were going to save yourself any illegal details for now.

"Not yet, the owners are good people and pay well, so I can't complain," you said, while you shrugged your shoulders.

"And do you study at school too?" she asked, now Eleven, dumbfounded by your occupations. You kindly nodded and she gave a soft 'wow' at that. At some point the conversation turned to them, as expected, and you found out about everything they had been doing both at school and work. You knew a thing or two from your weekly calls to Lenora Hills, but there was nothing like discussing it in person.

The doorbell rang as you were finishing your second course and then all chaos broke loose. It was, of course, the Wheelers, along with Dustin, Lucas, and Max. Everyone was there to greet your guests and you took advantage of some point in the confusion to go up to your room and change into the uniform of the bar where you were going to work.

"Are you leaving so soon?"

"Duty calls, mother" you joked, approaching her and kissing her "I'll be here by meal, I promise"

“Take care of yourself,” she asked you, worried, like any good mother, that someone in that bar was disrespectful to you. But hey, after facing a monstrous threat of death a couple of drunks seemed like a simple thing.

You quickly said goodbye to everyone and walked out the front door, ready to go about your daily routine.

“Welcome to The Hideout, how can I help you?” you hummed as you did with all the customers lately. It wasn't until you looked up that you realized who it was. Pretty smile, curly hair, and sparkling eyes "Oh our beloved rising rock star" you exclaimed, watching Eddie Munson sit across from you "What brings you here?"

"I wanted to have a beer and say hi too," he replied, his flirtatious grin never leaving him for a second.

It was funny how you met Eddie. You were in the literature club and previously had your own room for meetings, but due to cost cuts, you had to share space with the drama club. So it was that, at the beginning of the year, you found out that another club was operating in the prop warehouse, one called the “Hellfire Club”. You had heard of that before, but you thought it was just a prank to annoy the teachers, but it turned out that it was something formal and that it was a club where they met to play Dungeons and Dragons. You almost screamed when you found out and you were extremely sorry that due to time and availability issues you could no longer join that club. Still, you didn't avoid running into the guy a couple of times in the classroom, and soon after you got the job at The Hideout and found out he had a band that played there every Tuesday. How small the world was.

Thus you established a solid friendship with the boy, and as you got to know him you liked him better. One day you found out that he was selling drugs and Eddie was so worried that you might say something that he offered you to go into the business. You were surprised that he considered this the best decision, but that had been a difficult time and it suddenly seemed like a good idea. It was then that he went from being a complete unknown to being your co-worker and business associate.

You didn't even want to think about what your mother would say if she found out that you were keeping drugs in your house for the city freak.

"Dark beer, right?"

"You know me well," he exclaimed, with a goofy grin. You and Eddie had kissed a couple of times (nothing formal) when you found out it was a great stress reliever and he just because he was fascinated by you. Those encounters hadn't disturbed your friendship in the least, but sometimes you couldn't run away from those heart-eyed looks Eddie gave you. "I heard your family is here."

"Where did you hear that?" you asked amused. It was obvious that your family wasn’t famous and Eddie was only justifying his excessive attention to everything you said to him since you had only commented on it last Tuesday.

"A little bird over there" he exclaimed, brushing it off. You put the beer in front of him and leaned against the counter to finally see him properly.

"Well, it's true, they're here" you replied happily "And I'd still like to collect that favor you owe me"

“You just say the day and time, doll. I am available to you whenever you want,” he said politely. You smiled widely when you heard it and nodded, hoping that your day off would finally come.

You were just hoping the surprise would be nice for your little brother.

"What do you say we have fish for dinner later? I have some in the refrigerator and we brought vegetables"

"We just ate" he complained "Besides I don't like fish, you better order a pizza"

"Willam Byers, if we keep eating pizza like this, we're going to end up dead from diabetes or some shit" you laughed, as you maneuvered to open the door with shopping bags in hand.

"Diabetes is because of sugar, silly" he replied between laughs. There was nobody at home; Joyce had gone to whoever knows where, Jonathan was with Nancy, and El, obviously, with Mike.

Perhaps it was very childish behavior on your part, but you could tell without hesitation that you had contempt for Mike Wheeler. You weren't the best of friends from the start, but your feud was cemented a year ago, when he turned out to be a complete jerk to your little brother. You knew that maybe it was just adolescence and hormones that forced him to leave Will aside to dedicate his attention to Eleven, but it didn't justify the hostility with which he had treated him either.

That's how you built up that resentment and it ended up to the point where you practically couldn't stand to see it.

"Did you leave the light on?" he asked, looking around the room in confusion. You kept your composure and imitated the boy's face.

"I don't remember" you lied. Suddenly there was a crash and Will jumped in his place, almost dropping the bags that he had in his hand. You took them off and placed them on the kitchen counter, moving with mock wariness to check the living room, followed by Will.

You almost let out a genuine scream as you see a cloaked figure standing right in the middle.

"I finally found you two!" the person yelled, pointing a finger at you. His voice sounded slightly desperate "I've been looking for you for so long"

"Who are you?" you asked, looking him up and down; completely black clothing and his cape were bright red. You had always thought that red-suited him wonderfully and today you were checking it out.

“My name is Eddie the Banished and I am a poor exiled warrior who comes in the hope that you will help me save a home that disowns me” he explained to you. Will, who you hadn't seen until then, looked surprised rather than confused "Y/N the Lost" he called to you, approaching and gently taking your hand while looking at you with pleading eyes. Not for nothing was he at the drama club. "And of course, Will the Wise," he continued, now turning to your brother.

“No way,” he exclaimed, his gaze alternating between you and Eddie. For a second, you both grinned at him and it was only then that he thought to look further, only to notice a table neatly laid out with D&D items.

"What's the matter, Eddie the Banished?" you asked, stepping into character and grabbing the boy's cheeks as if you were genuinely concerned and he was devastated. Will was looking at you with a mixture of curiosity, amusement, and surprise.

"A disciple of Nuitari has been consumed by dark magic and wants to kill as many as he can to strengthen his powers and offer their souls as a sacrifice to his God," he said. You were amazed at the creativity that Eddie had to create the most wonderful plots and you fought not to smile. You were supposed to be in character, it was a time to worry "You have to contain him before it's too late and he manages to gather more of his people"

“But even I who am a good warrior cannot fight against dark magic.”

"I can," Will interjected, looking at both of you. You felt like you would scream with excitement.

“It will be dangerous”

"We have to do this, sister, we can't leave these poor people unprotected," he argued. He was in the story, as you had seen him so many times when you were little "Eddie the Banished, guide us to your village"

"Praise all the Gods, I knew that a couple of heroes like you wouldn’t deny a call for help" he thanked. You were about to say something else when he spoke again "But you can't go dressed like that" without giving explanations he went to the table and picked up a basket in which you used to put dirty clothes but now it contained something else: your old green cape and a robe full of stars, as well as a hat with the same print. Will's eyes glazed over a little at the fact that you had so carefully guarded that costume your mother had made for him so long ago, thinking that as he got older those games would become a thing of the past and he would have to 'mature' as everyone told him to do.

And then there was you and that crazy stranger you had acquired, both of you offering him one last adventure that would remind him of the happiness he lived when he was just a child.

“You don't have to do this if you don't want to,” you said, suddenly feeling fearful. Perhaps you had misunderstood everything and Will had changed his tastes and hobbies.

But he simply took both pieces of cloth and held yours out to you, making you see dark green velvet and purple satin with silver stars shimmering in the artificial light.

“This man has come looking for our help and that is what we are going to do; help him”

Eddie saw the most beautiful and brilliant smile of all on your face while you looked at the boy and he did not hesitate to hold your hand and Will's to pull you to the chairs.

You started listening to the backstory carefully, watching Eddie make all sorts of signs and lost yourself in his voice after a few minutes. It wasn't supposed to be such a complex adventure, but still, the world was down to the three of you in that room for the next few hours.

You had to admit that even though you knew his campaigns were good, you didn't think they would be that good. He was creative, taking it upon himself to give you challenges that only made you care more, but always keeping just the right amount of fun to continue an entertaining game.

“Garzag has Y/N!” Eddie said to Will after you tried to attack your opponent and failed monumentally; a fucking 1 in D20 got you there. The atmosphere had already heated up and by that point you were yelling, flailing, and making all sorts of complaints “He's lifting her off the ground without even touching her, putting all his effort into casting enough magic to squeeze her body to death. She whimpers, gasping for air to breathe, blood dripping from her wounded forehead, as she looks up at you” There was a dramatic pause and you could see real concern in the boy's eyes. "You're tired and hurt; you can just walk away and leave her to die. Or you can continue fighting and risk dying too… What do you want to do, Will the Wise?”

"Garzag's hurt too and he doesn't have many points left," Will mused. He shared a brief look with you, the kind that tells you that he won't leave you alone "So I'm going to send him back to hell where he belongs and save my sister"

"I'm warning you; you need the highest score to land a powerful enough blow," Eddie exclaimed, looking at him and then back at you. "If not... then it's all over for you two”

“Didn't you hear me? I'm going to kill that son of a bitch!" Will half-shouted, ecstatic on the adrenaline of the moment, making Eddie laugh out loud. He took the D20 without thinking twice and shook it for a few seconds in his hands, before throwing it on the table. You would swear that time stopped for an instant, as did your heart, and then the dice finally rolled out the score.

Twenty.

"That's it!"

"Will managed to cast a spell on Garzag!" Eddie announced, totally shocked “He doubles over his abdomen at the feel of it and carelessly drops Y/N to the floor. He is feeling how all the magic escapes from his body…” the boy began to imitate the movements that Garzag was supposed to be doing, holding his stomach in desperation “This is impossible! he yells, incredulous that anyone could have beaten him. He falls to the floor on his knees…” Eddie did it “and he begins to feel how little by little all the vitality of his body leaves him. The spell would leave only the pure parts of his soul and with nothing left he begins to turn to smoke, screaming in pain and writhing from the sensation” again, Eddie exemplified what he was saying “Curse the people and curse the heroes who have managed to defeat him, promising to return in another life and collect their revenge. Everything becomes a mess of screaming and the smell of putrefaction as he disappears, leaving only a black stain on the floor in front of the two of you. The irrefutable proof that you have managed to eliminate the evil and that now the village is safe”

When he finishes, you can't help but clap your hands. And by consequence, Will does too. You really do feel like a couple of heroes who have just fought one of their worst battles and it's all thanks to the brilliant and imaginative mind of the person you're acknowledging.

"That was amazing!" he says happily. Eddie gives a mocking reverence that causes his hood to fall off, exposing his pretty, crazy hair.

“You did all the work”

"Yeah, we kicked that asshole really good," you complimented, giving Will a high-five.

"Why didn't you tell me you had all this planned?" he said, now towards you. You just shrugged with a smile.

“Well, I thought it would be nice to surprise you. That's why I took you out shopping and let Eddie do all his magic."

"No offense, but how did he convince you Y/N to do this?" he insisted. There had been no time for introductions before playing and he was extremely intrigued to meet who had just put together the shortest and best campaign he had ever played.

"I'm the biggest nerd when it comes to D&D, so she barely had to say a few words to drag me here" replied Eddie, smiling at him "She wasn't lying when she said you have spirit, I've never had a couple of players that enthusiastic"

"The part where Garzag started attacking us with those flying demons was crazy, I never expected it" you confessed, getting back into the conversation.

“But did you see how we took them down? Just for one point…” Suddenly you found yourself involved in a heated discussion of the tensest moments, as well as occasional re-enactments of said events.

You were screaming and laughing so hard you didn't even notice when the front door opened.

"Okay, but hear me out: the way Will escaped Garzag’s finger of death was a miracle, I thought he would die and we would finally be done!"

"It takes more than a simple spell to kill a Byers!" you laughed out loud, watching Will do the same.

"Eddie?" someone behind you asked. From the corridor your mother, Eleven, Jonathan, and (the most surprised of all) Mike were looking at you "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, hello! I came to play a bit with Y/N ​​and Will” he answered as if he was the most obvious thing in the world.

"It's good that you're back," you said nervously, towards your mother and brother who were looking at you confused. You got up from your chair and yanked Eddie out of his, practically pushing him to face Joyce. "Mom, this is Eddie, my…" What was the correct term? Friend? Partner in the sale of drugs? Buddy I make out with occasionally when we're both stressed? “Co-worker” you ended up saying, but the downtime while searching for the term did not go unnoticed.

“It's nice to meet you, Mrs. Byers. Y/N has told me a lot about you” He smiled. You and Mike looked at Eddie in amazement, for he had never displayed such manners before.

"Hello! Nice to meet you too. I see they were playing a bit while we were gone”

"You should have been here, mom, it was a super crazy and cool thing," said Will, excited. It had been a long time since he had smiled that way and Jonathan smiled the same way when he saw him "Eddie is the best dungeon master and he has an official edition of the game, with figures and everything"

"I'm so happy to hear that, my love" Joyce replied, just as happy as her eldest son for the joy that suddenly invaded the environment "You also dusted off your robe and your hat"

"Y/N kept them all this time, can you believe it?"

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to play?" a different voice asked. It was Mike and he seemed really offended, but you couldn't feel any empathy. You knew that he wasn't interested in being with your brother but with Eddie, for whom he seemed to feel an exaggerated kind of admiration "He could have come"

"Oh, come on. When I still lived here you were never in the mood to play, we were spared the pain of you saying no” replied Will, his voice firm and even a little venomous. Everyone remained silent and you held back from laughing widely amid the awkward moment, happy that your brother had finally given the black-haired boy what he deserved.

"Besides, you're not that good, Wheeler," you added, with a smirk. You didn't want to get into a fight with a teenager, so you spoke again before he could, "Mom, sorry, but I lost track of time and I haven't made any dinner yet..."

"We'll order pizza," Jonathan informed you, causing you and Will to share a look before bursting out laughing. “What?”

“Nothing, Johnny. Pizza sounds great”

“I… I think it's time to go,” reported Eddie, who had been watching the scene in silence as he fiddled with his rings. You had learned that he did that when he was nervous and personally you found him most tender.

"Don't you want to stay for dinner?" your mother chimed in, kind as only she was.

"I wouldn't want to be a bother"

"Nothing of that! We'd like to meet you, Y/N doesn't introduce us to many friends."

“That's because she doesn't have any friends,” Jonathan scoffed and you took a couple of steps to punch him in the arm, hearing him groan. Most of those present laughed at the exchange.

"Huh, well..." Eddie hesitated. You had never seen him so shy and the reason why he was like that intrigued you "if it's no problem, I guess I can stay"

“Wonderful,” Joyce smiled, looking at you and then back at him. “Y/N, clear the living room table so we can have dinner there, please,” she said and you nodded. You grabbed Eddie's wrist and you could almost swear you saw him blush.

"Come on, we have to save your pieces"

"I help!" Will muttered and for a second you heard again that happy 12-year-old boy you thought was gone forever.

He didn't even care about Mike's angry look and you were too busy to notice the knowing smiles your mom and older brother shared.

"Are you sure it's okay for me to stay?"

"Of course, Ed" you answered, taking the figure of a warrior to put it in the box “Jonathan's right, I don't have many friends” you joked, hearing Will laugh at your side.

The three of you continued to chat for a while and when the rest joined in you sat down on a couch. You noticed that you were still wearing your costumes and blushed, offering to leave them in the laundry basket they had been in earlier.

"So you work with Y/N?" your mother asked, in the boy's direction. She wasn't a prejudiced woman, but you understood her reasons for doing some research on the metalhead you had brought into the house and with whom you seemed to have a bond.

“Something like that. My band plays at the bar where she works and we met there”

“He ordered a beer and I told him I liked his music and that's why we started talking”

"And what instrument do you play?"

“The guitar” he replied, again with that shyness that wasn’t natural to him “Y/N told me you guys live in California now, right? How is it over there?" he asked politely. You knew Eddie well enough to realize that he was looking to make a good impression and it made you smile.

The four of them began to tell a few things about Lenora Hills, which Eddie listened to carefully, feeling comfortable after a while. When the pizzas arrived and dinner went on nicely, with the two of you (and occasionally Mike, who seemed to be in a terrible mood) telling each other the latest about Hawkins and the rest talking about a town you didn't know.

"And Will still has no one to exchange saliva with?" you asked at some point, hearing a scolding from your mother for the term used to refer to a couple.

"I ask the same, oldie,” he said with a mocking tone, while he crossed his arms "You'd better get a couple of cats”

"Shut up!" you laughed, hitting him gently.

“Don't you want to take her, Eddie? She doesn't eat much and doesn't snore at night, we can give her to you” said Jonathan. Contrary to what you expected, he laughed out loud and looked at you while he licked his lips, as if he was really considering it.

“What a pair of brothers I have” you complained, pretending to be hurt “El, you are the only one who will receive a gift from me this Christmas”

"Now, don't fight" warned your mother, with a smile, but knowing that things could get violent from one moment to another. It was better to intervene when you were still joking in a good way "Better clear the dishes so you can go to sleep, it's late"

"I can help you before I go," Eddie informed him, taking the plate from your mother's hand and taking the rest into a pile. He took care of that and Will followed him to put the cups and pizza boxes in the kitchen trash.

“Your boyfriend is a real gentleman”

"He is not my boyfriend!" you hissed in Jonathan's direction. It wasn't because you didn't like the idea, but because you didn't want him to have a reason to bother you.

“And you don't want him to be? He seems to be a good boy."

"Mom!" you complained now, smiling out of sheer nervousness. You liked Eddie, a lot, but it was different kissing him a couple of times than now your mom and brother were trying to match you.

“And think about it, if you become his girlfriend, he will also be Will's friend. You kill two birds with one stone” argued Jonathan. You didn't have time to answer him, because Eddie and your little brother were already in front of you again. They seemed to have had their own conversation and proof of this was the blush that appeared on the curly-haired boy's cheeks.

"I say goodbye, I was very pleased to meet you and I thank you for dinner"

“You can come anytime, we were glad to meet you too,” Joyce said kindly, hugging him to say goodbye. My God, your mom was doing her best to embarrass you or maybe she just wanted to secure her new son-in-law.

“See you, Will the Wise,” she said, now towards the aforementioned, while extending her fist to bump him “Goodbye, Jane. And my condolences”

"Why?"

"Because a girl like you has a boyfriend like this," he answered, hearing Mike blurt out a swear word and hearing you laugh. Even Eleven laughed at the joke "Hope I don't see you soon, Wheeler."

"I'll walk you to your van" you exclaimed with a smile. The two of you walked to the exit and then to where the van was parked, where Eddie turned to look at you.

“Here we say goodbye”

"Thank you very much for coming"

“Are you kidding? I had a great time. The pizza was delicious and your family is very nice” he said happily. The truth was that he had enjoyed everything, but what caused him the most happiness was having spent an entire afternoon with you. 

"Everyone liked you very much, especially Will," you confessed. Eddie giggled that didn't seem to be because of what you just said and it made you curious.

He wasn't going to tell you, but when Will walked him into the kitchen, he joked that he wouldn't like to become his brother-in-law and that hadn't left Eddie's mind ever since. I hadn't been in a serious relationship in a long time, and the warm reception from your family (even without knowing him) only confirmed that you were a pretty good fit.

"I guess I'll see you around"

"On Tuesday, don't forget" you smiled "I'll even treat you to whatever you want to drink, as a thank you"

“First of all, remember that this was to pay you a favor and I think I ended up owing you. And secondly, better reconsider that because I can drink like I'm a bottomless barrel when I put my mind to it” he warned you, making you laugh “What do you say we better have dinner together that day? French fries are okay,” he suggested. All your brain heard was 'date'.

"I'd love to"

"Cool," he smiled, trying not to look more excited than he should.

"Have a good trip, Eddie the Banished" you said gently, as you put a hand on his cheek "May the gods protect your path and arrive safely wherever you go"

"Does this mean a goodbye?"

"A see you later" you answered, while both of you laughed at the slip towards the interpretation of your characters. Then you noticed the short distance between you and the evident tension that had been installed, especially because you were holding his face and he had accommodated a hand on your waist.

You saw him lick his lips, another habit that you had begun to know about him, and you also felt his gaze diverting for just a second to your mouth. But that was enough for you to understand what was going through his mind.

“Can I?” he asked, knowing that you already knew what he meant. You didn't think the day would end like this, but you let him lean into you a little and brought your lips together in a gentle kiss. It was different from what you were used to, because the times you had kissed had been between smoke, sweat, and the influence of beer. But although it was different, you could get used to it.

One of your hands managed to get tangled in his hair and bring him closer to deepen the kiss just a few seconds before letting go.

“Come on, go home,” you said, not because you didn't want to kiss him but because you knew that you wouldn't be able to stop if he was still there. Eddie smiled and stole another kiss, shorter and louder, before pulling away and climbing into the driver's seat.

"We'll meet again, Y/N the beautiful," he murmured goodbye, starting the car and heading down the road in the dark.

When you returned to the house, with a huge smile and the most obvious blush of all, you noticed that Jonathan was taking five dollars out of his wallet to hand it to Will reluctantly.

"Why is that?" you asked confused. Eleven and Joyce shared an amused look that made you uneasy.

"We bet five dollars that you and Eddie would kiss"

"And I lost," Jonathan groaned. Your face only turned redder than it had already been upon arrival.

“You guys were spying!"

“I didn't see anything," your mother defended herself, but your three siblings roared with laughter and even Mike cracked a smile.

“We have to take care of our sister” Jonathan justified himself.

"Ugh, I can't wait for all of you to go to California again," you complained, flopping back against the couch and crossing your arms in a fake tantrum.

But honestly, you loved having your family in Hawkins.

TAG LIST: @sweetdayme4427

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #stranger things 4 #joseph quinn #will!sister #byers!reader

[dustandshadows8]

Why I think Wednesday is demiromantic or greyromantic 

(None of this fan art is mine I found it on Pinterest so credits to the og artists your talent is incredible.)

First, of all for all you beautiful people who have forgotten or didn't know these two definitions, let's take a look:

A grey romantic person:

is a person with a romantic orientation that is somewhere between aromantic and romantic.

For example, a gray-romantic may:  -Experience romantic attraction but not very often.  -Experience romantic attraction, but not desire romantic relationships.  -Desire relationships which are not quite platonic and not quite romantic.

A demiromantic person:

is a person who cannot feel a romantic attraction to someone until a strong emotional connection is established. The emotional connection can be any number of things from a prolonged talking stage to a sexual relationship turning to more. It depends on the case and all people are different on how they feel emotional connections with others.

At the beginning of the show Wednesday says that she does not have any interest in being like her Mother and falling in love and getting married. (Just like to say the proud aroacespec positivity I got form hearing those words...)

First of all this indicates that Wednesday does not consider herself a allo person, she has romantic feelings and has decided to never act on them or she has never experienced romantic attraction before (demiromantic/greyromatic?).

However as the show progresses we can see her form what can be interpreted as romantic bonds with two people.

(And will be by a wider straight/cis/allo audience who might not understand the aroacespec coding in the show.)

But, more importantly, she also forms a possibly stronger platonic bond with Enid.

Wednesday's relationship with Enid progresses in a healthy way. They get to know each other. At the beginning of their relationship they have a tape across the floor which nether of them cross, even at the end when Enid thinks he's saying goodbye for ever she does not hug Wednesday because she knows she doesn't like it. They respect each others boundaries.

Across the show we see their friendship deepen and Wednesday begin to more openly return Enid's affections.

One of the most important things to take from this is the speed of, said, progression.

It takes the whole show for Wednesday to be comfortable enough to hug Enid, which shows he level of trust she has gained for her new friend. She doesn't even accept affection from her family.

And, just as importantly, there is still room for a lot of growth in their relationship.

How does this tie into the grey/demiromantic theory?

Well, as Enid and Eugene are the only two people who Wednesday willingly calls her friends (correct me if I'm wrong my memory is shit) and Enid is the (potential?) romantic interest in the situation, she has obviously formed an emotional connection with her and only after she has formed an emotional connection will she allow Enid to hug her.

It ties pretty perfectly into the Demi category.

Now we have to address something else.

The boys.

First of all, especially as an ace (maybe grey or Demiromatic?) person myself, the relationships with both of them seem very rushed and forced.

It seems to me, that she only uses them to find information about the case. The whole show, everything, even the kiss all looked like a ploy for information.

After she suspects Xaviour she turns on him pretty quick. Would she do that if she really cares about him? And she has no problems with being against Tyler in the final.

All through the show her interactions with them are abrupt and harsh, she often forgets about them to continue her investigations, she frequently appears to have no regard to their feelings.

Why would she treat them so badly if she cared about them?

And why would her reserved personality allow her to progress two relationships so fast?

So how does the grey/demiromanticism link into these situations?

It's her extreme awkward and unusual reactions and treatment of both guys that leads me to think that a) she doesn't romantically like ether of them and b) she truly doesn't know how to interact with someone she has a crush on.

Sometime, when your feelings have deepened from some previous emotional connection, it is a lot easier to ignore them.

And Wednesday has never formed such a connection before Enid.

How would she know how to act and show romantic affection?

The stuff you see on T.V looks stupid. People meet each other, go on cute dates, have an mis-communication, get back together, kiss in the rain.

Where is the realism in that? Where is the emotional bonding the inability to understand emotions? The questioning of feelings?

Is this just how allo relationships are portrayed in the media or do people really just know if they like someone, that easily?

I genuinely don't know if some people just know if they like someone without months of questioning.

And Wednesday probably wouldn't ether.

Which is why she tries to make her relationship so like that, quick and easy, even though the emotions (that I'm assuming allos manage to feel after like two weeks or something) aren't there. Instead it's just the words and actions without any feelings.

So, it's the build up of her and Enid's relationship, her reactions to the boys advances especially in the cliche development of their relationships that feels so forced that and doesn't suit her personality at all that leads me to think that Wednesday is ether grey or demiromantic.

As for the ace part in both.

Maybe I'm just self projecting. But does that girl really appear allo to you?

Really?

#wednesday show #wednesday netflix #wednesday addams #aroace wednesday #wenclair #wednesday and enid #wednesday x enid #xavier thorpe #tyler galpin #wednesday thoughts #asexual #demiromantic #greyromatic #the allos are at it again #are the allos ok #straight people do not get this show #one of my friends legit told me she shipped Wednesday with Tyler #how????

[kerubimcrepin]

Episode 20 - My Friend Bashi (Part 1)

We had reached the milestone of 20 episodes, and I want to sincerely thank the readers for sticking with me so far. :)

I also have a small announcement: after finishing liveblogging this episode, I will take a very small break from the show to do some reading of articles and comics instead.

It's starting to feel awkward - constantly referencing some canon materials without reviewing them on this blog proper, y'know? I originally planned to do this all at once, before the movie, but I think it'll be more fun to do it in multiple reading breaks, during the show.

So many kids in this city, and Joris is friends with none of them. Except for Tatak.

All analysis and plot leaves my body as I think about how much Kerubim cares about Joris.

He's really not perfect, but no matter how much I joke about his failures, he really does care and try his best.

He's too nice for me to actually make fun of in any serious manner.

It's very nice to see the more down-low, bittersweet moments of parenting and childhood portrayed. It's also nice that it's just between the two of them, without Simone.

I love her, but it's very cute to see just Joris and Kerubim, and how they act when they're alone together.

I think that it's interesting, that even at 7yo, Joris is already at the... "this one social interaction was a disaster, and it's over, just irredeemably over"-level overthinking about relationships.

Perhaps it's knowing that for Kerubim it, often times, was like that. Kerubim did inspire very many people to either hate him with passion, or leave him.

Perhaps it's the fact that, besides Kerubim, Kerubim's friends, and Simone, he doesn't have a family; and besides Tatak, he doesn't seem to have any friends: and that makes him struggle with the idea of losing relationships.

Keke I will be real, I think Tatak is his only friend in general.

...Man. I am making myself sad by writing these things.

I don't think Joris ever had good social skills in his life. Just issues after issues.

As I've said in the previous posts, both Keke and Joris have an issue with needing to be liked always all the time, and the way it makes them do things to seem Cool and Awesome. Even if Joris has this issue in a very introverted way.

It might just be normal kids stuff, but it does add a certain flair to the things we see him do as an adult, if one accepts the idea he's always been like this.

Kerubim's way of connecting to others is to draw from his own experiences, and compare them. It's a more... mature way of cheering up people, than just saying "it gets easier!" like he used to.

For all his faults, Kerubim has grown emotionally from his youth. But it can be a thin line between making everything about yourself, and trying to say that it gets better from experience.

Even so, Joris cares a lot about his experiences and life (cough cough. the Lore), so it works for them, both as a way to distract him and to cheer him up. Kerubim knows this, it's his go-to technique.

Anyway.

I think Kerubim either vastly overestimates the depth of what happened here (I highly doubt Ecaflip is giving him tasks because he's "the best"), or he is lying to Joris, because "I spent my whole childhood afraid that my father, who is a living god, would eat me Zeus-style, because of shit like cleaning the toilets badly or not delivering the fish on time." isn't a nice story.

This is exactly what I'm talking about.

A small aside: according to The Wheel Of Destiny #8 Kerubim Crepin (which will be one of the things I liveblog during the Reading Break), Bashi and Kerubim became friends before the events of episode 3, Strich Hunt.

It makes a lot of sense, because before the events of that episode, Ecaflip had... a very rough way of treating and speaking to Kerubim. Even if he had a soft spot for him, enough to save him (and then manipulate him) during said Wheel of Destiny article, I think Kerubim only truly cemented himself as Ecaflip's most favourite in the Strich Hunt episode.

Also, considering the fact that in Wheel of Destiny, little Bashi reports to knowing and strongly disliking Atcham, it's safe to say that in this episode we have a confirmed instance of Atcham being canonically present and simply not mentioned.

...keke sure is the guy who says "im the last living crepin. laugh" while having a brother. insane.

I yet again want to gush about the portrayal of relationships in this show.

I think all of us can relate to meeting someone, and not thinking much, — not yet knowing that they will turn out to be one of the coolest people you've ever met.

Anyway, tangent incoming.

One thing that's interesting to me, is that Kerubim is never depicted as having friends in the temple. From what we see, he spends most of the time alone, or with Ecaflip.

The reasons may be:

He is Ecaflip's favorite. He had important tasks from the moment he joined the temple. It alienated people.

He was Atcham's brother. Kids are judgemental, and Atcham is a perfect bullying target. Chances are, they didn't like him due to the association.

He came in very mentally ill and unsociable, due to, y'know, being orphaned, and never managed to make friends because the impression that he's "the sad mentally ill kid" stayed.

No wonder that he got anxious around three people, and then immediately trusted them when they were nice to him.

He probably hadn't had anyone be nice to him in ages. Or, like, acknowledge him too much, at the very least.

I won't elaborate on how I think Atcham was treated in the temple lest I fucking scare you, (Something-something, literally catboy Rule of Rose,) but I will say that, just like Atcham is still violently mentally ill due to whatever happened to him, Kerubim's experiences with loneliness and alienation as a child most likely fueled his dishonesty and attention-seeking behaviours as an adult.

So I understand why, even though Bashi kinda sucks, Kerubim is so broken up about losing him. There's a lot more tragedy to this than one can first see.

It was a very important moment for Kerubim to finally have a person in his life that wasn't his father (who constantly threatened to fucking eat him), one of the kids who either disliked him or were too intimidated to talk to him, one of the random monks, or his severely mentally ill brother (who fucking hated him.)

He was his first friend.

#ep20 #wakfu #dofus #krosmoz #ro liveblogs dofus #atcham crepin #kerubim crepin #joris jurgen

[lordystrange]

What I really find concerning is that many people romanticise Milkvan as a co-dependnt relationship (with takes like if one of them were to d*e the other one would immediately unalive themself - somebody literally said this on Reddit and of course received tons of upvotes). Now there are certainly people who find co-dependency very romantic but actually it is highly unhealthy since it makes growth and individual development impossible. And therefore to romanticise co-dependency is anti-growth.

Many Milkvans whine "Oh these evil Bylers just want El to be forever miserable under the accuse that a break-up with Mike is apparently female independence and growth. But true female independence is that she chooses to be with Mike." But so far Milkvan's relationship only seems to promote co-dependency: Mike feels indebted to El because she saved his life numerous times. El feels indebted to Mike because he was the first person to treat her with kindness and showed her that he genuinely cared about her as a person.

And I feel like due to this indebtedness both characters refuse to contemplate whether their feelings for each other may only be platonic or romantic. Nobody ever really tells El and Mike their relationship is wrong: Even the instance with Hopper is played off as a dad who refuses to see his daughter date at all. So nothing about El "choosing" Mike is romantic at the moment because ever since she met him she never really knew there was a choice at all. And she only starts learning it at the end of Season 4 so we have barely scraped the beginning of the storyline where El (and later also Mike) get to choose

Anon, you nailed this!

I think I saw that comment in Reddit. I think I even replied to it (and got downvoted so badly).

I guess this mindset is because we’ve been taught that Romeo and Juliet is as good as romance gets. And relationships have forever been really toxic because of gender inequality. Now, in same-sex relationships there is none of that imbalance, and it has shown us what it looks like to be in a relationship purely based on love, not looks and expectations.

”I can’t live without you” is not romantic. It’s obsessive, unhealthy, and not true.

”I don’t want to live without you” is romantic. It shows that the person chooses to live with the other person because they love them. Not for any other reason than that.

Thank you for writing this, my English wouldn’t have been good enough to explain this thing but you did it perfectly!

#byler #anti mileven #anti milkvan

[sokkastyles]

Update on terrible takes by Azula stans. "Azula shows the same capacity for empathy as Zuko and is shown to be kind and caring in the series, and she also shows remorse for her actions, so to say that he is somehow more innately compassionate than her or is a better person than her is just wrong. They are the same, except Zuko got a chance to leave and Azula never did." I'm paraphrasing, but that's the jist of it. This isn't as bad as some others, but idk it just seems like it's downplaying all the work Zuko put in to change and also that he is a kind person at his core. Azula is not the same. It's not to say that she could never be better, but it just seems like they want her to be Zuko 2.0 while also putting Zuko down in the same breath. They're just pointing out things that are never there to make her seem better and that's annoying lmao.

I don't think anyone is "innately" compassionate or lacking in compassion, and I agree that Azula has the same capacity for kindness in theory as Zuko does. She just hasn't demonstrated any, and Zuko has. That's the difference. And it absolutely is downplaying Zuko's character and the work Zuko put in to change to say that he "had a chance to change" and Azula didn't. What Ozai did was not meant to give him a chance, it was meant to crush any compassion and kindness he had in him, and for a while, it worked. If Zuko had been someone else, it might have worked entirely.

Every time people try and point to Azula showing caring for others or remorse for her actions, it's always the same places which...don't actually show that at all. When does Azula show remorse for her actions? When she tells Ty Lee to "calm down" after she made her cry and then grudgingly admits that she's jealous before going immediately back to acting like she's better than her as soon as Ty Lee resumes her fawning over her? Because that's the only time when Azula is canonically even remotely sorry for anything, and even then it's mostly about her and what Ty Lee needs to do for her. She's not remorseful for any of the ways she mistreated others or furthered an imperialist regime, just remorseful that she didn't get to win in the end. She's upset that all of her friends left her but refuses to understand that they left because she treated them badly.

The other instances of Azula's "caring" that people usually point to are...her forcing Zuko to maintain a lie for her to their abusive father who has no qualms about maiming him, her taking Zuko back to said abusive violent father, her keeping Zuko away from the one adult who does care about him and want his safety, her telling Zuko to ignore those pesky morals and memories of being loved in the past. None of that is kindness or compassion. And if these people really think that this is it, that this is the best Azula can do, then they're the ones who believe she has no capacity for kindness. Azula certainly can be kind, she just hasn't been. And that won't change if her stans continue to insist that her cruelty is actually kindness.

As far as Zuko and Azula being the same in showing compassion, we have several direct parallels in the series that show us the difference between Zuko and Azula on that front. One is Zuko showing compassion for his men in "The Storm" and apologizing for trying to push them too hard and Azula threatening her men for questioning irrational and dangerous orders. Another is Azula saying Iroh and Azulon should die so that Ozai can become firelord and Zuko telling her that they wouldn't like it if Lu Ten wished that their father would die, so she shouldn't say it about others. Another is Azula forcing her palanquin riders to carry her double-time and Zuko feeling uncomfortable with being carried a short distance. Another is Azula playing a mean trick on Mai and Zuko while Zuko humiliates himself to save her. Another is Azula striking lightning at Katara while Zuko jumps in front of it to protect her. Another is Azula laughing while her brother is dying on the ground while Zuko looks on stoically and grimly while Azula is defeated and chained. I've seen so many people try to attack him for his expression there and claim he was enjoying watching Azula suffer and it's honestly bonkers because Azula was the one enjoying watching her brother suffer moments before, and yet Zuko doesn't take the same joy in seeing his sister hurt, because he's not a person who enjoys cruelty.

#zuko #azula #the discourse

[poetic-crimelord]

What if Lou Ellen had not always been with CHB? What if she left during the First War?

This is about the day she left and how her best friend reacted to it.

Can be read [here] or down below

Lou Ellen had enough. She knows who her godly parent is. She knows how badly the Olympians treat both their children and all the rest of immortals and demigods, none of them care enough about them. So naturally when Chris Rodriguez, older half brother of her best friend Cecil, had talked to her about Kronos ideology in the whole Titan War, and her mother, Hecate, had also been giving her some dream visits asking her to join Kronos' side, she had made a decision.

She had decided to join Kronos and was even more sure about it after what happened in the Battle of The Labyrinth where she had enough. Lee Fletcher, the Head Counselor of Cabin 7 had died trying to fight against Luke Castellan or well Kronos' vassel. Lee died because for some reason Annabeth thought that all Cabin 7 should stick to only using bows since they were so good at it anyway. Lee wasn't really good with bows which basically left him defenseless. Lou hates the whole thing more because of that fact one her best friends, Will Solace, had not only lost one but three of his siblings in the battle.

So just the night after the whole thing she decided to leave.

She asked Selina beforehand, who her mom had explained was a spy from Luke, for help on how to get to Kronos' side and on how to leave and be able to fight against the gods. Selina, who wasn't all that happy to be asked about the whole subject, directed her to where Kronos' base was and how she could get in without getting killed in an instant.

Which finally brings Lou Ellen to today, the day she leaves.

She had packed everything while everyone was sleeping, and had told Chiron she was gonna take an hour working in the infirmary so no one questioned why she wasn't at the campfire. Everything was planned from start to end so no one would try to stop her, but when planning she hadn't counted on the fact her best friend, Cecil Markowitz would have realized she was up to something.

When she hears the door of the cabin opening she panics, she tries to think of any spell or way to hide until whoever is entering leaves, but when she realizes who is in the door she freezes for a couple of seconds. Cecil, who couldn't look as well as her in the dark, was entering the cabin.

“Lou… Weren't you on infirmary duty?” Cecili asked when he had finally turned on the light. Lou, who has a ride to take in less than twenty minutes and knows that if she stays any more she would feel guilty, only scoffs and takes her backpack walking towards the door, where Cecil is standing.

She takes a breath before looking at who she considers even a brother and right now has to fully cut off of her life.

“I'm leaving, my mom has asked for me to be her representative.” Lou said.

She was telling the truth on a sense, when she had taken the decision to leave camp, her mother had appeared to her in a dream telling her that she was glad she was taking Kronos' side since she hated to see her children thinking she didn't care about them since they weren't claim even if it actually was the Olympians fault since they didn't let other cabins to be made, so Hecate had also expressed she would be appearing more to her so she could represent all the Hecate children while on reunions with the Kronos army.

“On what?” Asked Cecil with a frown slightly forming in his face.

“On Luke's army, Hecate is with him, so am I, meaning I'm leaving, right now.”

Slowly Cecil's expression changed from surprise to horror in seconds, it was as if she had just told him his grandma had won the lottery and then died.

“Lou, you can't! Luke is the bad guy! He wants to destroy Olympus! Is it his fault that we are even at War!” Shouted Cecil desperately.

For a second, Lou thought of arguing against it, she knew who the actual bad guys were, the gods were not in the right, but she decided against fighting never less, she had to leave now or the whole cabin would be back before she could even leave, and even explaining would not resolve anything. So she pushed Cecil aside, who shouted at her and tried to fight to make her stay, but she didn't listen or flatter, she just ran. Ran away from the bad life she was supposed to have.

And even if Cecil was fast because of his heritage, Lou was faster somehow, maybe she had curse Cecil or make herself faster with magic, she didn't know or cared, her only goal right now was to get to Thalia's tree, where Ethan Nakamura was supposedly waiting for her to take her to the base of Kronos and formally introduce her.

But, just when the tree came into a vision alongside a shadow figure next to it, someone (Cecil) took her arm and turned her around.

“Lou, don't, please,” said Cecil between pants. “don't leave.”

“Cecil, no, I'm not happy here and I can't even be claim, I don't belong here!” Lou shouted looking back at Cecil. Her only regrets of leaving would be leaving behind her friends who were claim demigods, and would never understand how awful being unclaim was.

“And joining him is better?”

“Yes, so much and I would be as important as any of you… When we destroy the gods we can be together Cecil, until then I'm leaving.” Say Lou, firmly, she hated seeing her friend being hurt by her decision but it was what she wanted.

Cecil started crying and in what most probably was an impulse, took off his David Star, the symbol of his beliefs and extended his hand, offering it to Lou.

“What are you doing?” She asked, looking between Cecil's face and his hand. “I-I don't- I'm not Jewish or anything, I'm an atheist, why…”

Cecil just shook his head, but didn't move his hand away, still expecting her to take it.

“Lou, take it, promise you would come back, promise you won't die” Cecil says between sobs.

Lou Ellen was surprised, she hadn't realized how much he cared about her. She took the pendant hesitantly and took out her camp beds and gave it in exchange to Cecil who didn't even hold them, letting them fall.

She didn't say or let Cecil say anything else, she ran towards Ethan who took her arm immediately and made a sign with his hand making a person with a helmet and a motorcycle appear. They got on the motorcycle, and the last thing she saw while leaving was Cecil standing at the border of camp just looking in the direction they were going.

She didn't regret her decision, but seeing Cecil cry definitely was making her feel guilty. Good thing she wouldn't have time to think about it while she was accommodating into Kronos army, after all fun or free time was not in when the end of the war was so close.

-

Cecil looks down the road, where Lou and who he thinks is Ethan, another unclaim kid who had left a while ago, drives away with another mysterious person. He looks to his hand where Lou Ellen's camp beads are, he can't believe his best friend just left, worst it she left to be with Kronos.

He stays there for what feels like an hour until Travis finds him.

“Oh Cecil! Gods we were so scared, where were you?” Was the first thing Travis said when he found him, his older half-brother had kneel down and was trying to see if he had any injuries.

Cecil just hugged him. He couldn't tell Travis what Lou had said, right? Or should he? After all, they weren't on the same side anymore.

“Cecil, what happened? Do you know where Lou Ellen is?”

At that he broke, instantly starting to sob in his brother's embrace. Thankfully Travis seems to realize he doesn't want to talk about it since he instantly gets both of them up, even while he still holds Cecil in his arms, and starts walking to what he hopes is their cabin. But it is not.

After a couple of minutes they're in the infirmary, instantly being attacked by question not only by Chiron, but also by Will Solace, Michael Yew and Connor who all had somehow known that Lou hadn't been in the campfire or infirmary.

It takes a bit to first calm Cecil down and second to even get him to talk, but he explains the situation. Lou's mom, who seems to be Hecate, had asked her to join Kronos' army and so she had to leave.

Chiron was surprised at the revelation but didn't say much, Lou wasn't the first or last to leave camp. On the other hand both of Cecil's brothers were looking at the floor with blank faces, Cecil wasn't sure if it was because of Luke or because of how many campers in cabin eleven had left in the last months. He didn't really care if he was honest, his best friend just ran away.

The only person who seem to be in the same page as Cecil was Will who looks as sad as the son of Hermes, even thought Will had already lost three siblings at the battle and two who had join Kronos side, he knew the pain of someone love leaving better than anyone, or well at least in Cecil opinion he does.

#lou ellen blackstone #cecil markowitz #pjo fanfic #Lou Ellen fanfic #Lou ellen & Cecil Markowitz are friends and children in this lol #Also I love Lou <3 #skull.txt #writing #ao3 fanfic

[martinsorbit]

Finders Keepers: Draft #2 (first bit) / About Earlier

My grammar mistake checker isnt working so. We die like men until I get to my computer later. This is just a bit from draft 2, I'll prob finish it later, i just HAD to show this part i wrote hehe

Also, this is mostly a test for writing character dialogs and conversations!! sorey if it looks a bit scuffed :]

Scene Context: You and Sun come back to your house after a rather stressful morning out in town. Some things happened, and you are pretty pissed about it, so you go into your backyard to try and get it all out. Sun comes up to you to ask if you're ok and two talk about what happened some hours ago.

"Well, It's just that—" Sun interrupts himself as if he's rethinking on what he should say to you. There is a small pause before he continues

"I don't think this is a healthy way to cope with what happened, friend! ...Let alone safe." He says the last part a bit more quietly than the whole sentence.

The worst part is not that you are being lectured about how you should properly channel your anger; The worst part, really, was that he was right– and you knew it.

"I mean, I never really said it was— I- I know It's not really a good way to get it all out, but hey what can I do." you let out a forced chuckle in a failed attempt to make the conversation more light, but it doesn't work, In fact, Sun seems a bit more worried about your well-being now.

“Are you sure you’re feeling okay?” They come closer to try and get your attention, tilting their head only slightly. There are a few seconds of silence as you look away, thinking of a way to maybe change the conversation's subject.

You don't feel like talking about happened earlier, but given how Sun is just as stubborn as you in some regards, there probably isn't an escape from this interaction.

"I'm fine, it's just that..." you start, trying to find the right words to properly convey your thoughts.

"Remember the lady we saw this morning? The one met when leaving hardware store?"

Of course he remembers. Hell, even if he wanted to, they probably wouldn't be able to forget it. Neither of you would.

"Well, she's certainly a hard figure to forget– for a bit at least– She did says some rather... mean things." Sun's ray's shrink a bit while they start fidgeting with what's left of their wrist ribbons.

" Sun, she treated you like shit! for no reason at all!". You raise your voice, but as soon as you notice, you try talking a bit more lower to try and calm yourself down: "It makes me so pissed off, she just didn't care."

"Maybe she was having a bad day! People have those sometimes"

"It certainly didn't look like it, and even if she was, it doesn't just give her the right to lash out at you!" You turn to Sun with a bit of concern in your eyes. "Aren't you upset about it too?"

There is a short silence while you wait for their response. You dont know if the delay for his answer is because he's trying to figure out what to answer, or if hes considering to even answer the question at all.

The only thing breaking the silence is the almost unnoticeable clicks coming from their machinery

"To say that we aren't would be a lie, we are pretty upset! It's just that... we got a bit used to this by now!"

Sun saying that, with the unchanging smile of his faceplate makes you feel sad on the inside. He pokes the top of your head, slowly changing back to his cheerful tone. "You don't need to get your silly head all worried for us! We are fine"

"But I WANT to worry! This isn't okay, Sun! You shouldn't just be getting thrown around and treated badly just because people can! None of you." You protest, denying their request. "You have feelings and a life just like any other, they should know that."

"Why do you care so much? This doesn't affect you, it doesn't hurt you! Why do you care so much about us?!" They say, back with a less jokey tone and more of a serious one.

While Sun's question comes off a bit more harsh than they intend, you feel like there is also some kind of confussion behind it. His question is serious, because he genuinely doesn't get why you would care about their well-being at all.

"Because you are my friend!" You say, in the same tone—if not louder.

He doesn't answer, though the clicking sound seems to appear again.

"I care about you guys, and I WANT to care! You are deserving of love and kindness, even if you don't feel like you do sometimes."

#text #finders keepers y/n #finders Keepers au #martinsayssfuff #sun #dca #y/n #sun x y/n #kinda???

[actress4him]

Querencia 12.5 - First Healing

You guys voted, and amazingly enough, I have delivered! This chapter was already floating around in my head, though it’s not technically the “next” chapter of the series like the poll said. This falls right after Shopping Trip and before Just a Cold and the Mind Control trilogy, and is a moment I realized was missing from the story.

Taglist: @darthsutrich , @inky-whump , @painful-pooch , @pigeonwhumps , @bookworm2107

Previous | Next | Masterlist

Contains: lady whump, dude whump, broken ribs, self-deprecating thoughts, references to past homelessness, hidden injuries

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Liliana is alone in the warehouse, and it’s…a bit creepy, if she were to be honest. The place is huge, and her footsteps echo everywhere she walks. She’s tempted to hide in her room until the team returns. Then again, something about being shut in a room with no idea what’s going on in the rest of the building is even more disconcerting than being out here in the emptiness.

She should be ready for when they get back, anyway. This is the first time they’ve gotten called out on superhero duties since she’s been staying here, which means that they could very well get hurt and need her to heal them when they get back. Nari has assured her that it doesn’t happen very often. Still, that’s the only reason she’s here, right? If one of them does come back hurt, she should be ready to help right away, not locked away in her room.

So she makes her way to the infirmary, instead. It’s a small room, mainly comprised of a cot in the center, a counter with cabinets above it on one wall, and some shelves on another. They keep it stocked with first aid items, some a bit beyond what’s typical like crutches and slings and forceps.

They don’t really like to go to the hospital, Jamil had explained. None of them have ever had personal encounters with people who hate Nons…Supers…but they’ve heard the tales. They can’t risk being at the mercy of doctors and nurses whose political leanings they don’t know.

Liliana understands that perfectly.

They won’t need all the paraphernalia anymore, though, not with her around. She’s happy that she can take that burden off of them, take away the worry of what if someday we get hurt too badly to treat here. They’ve done so much for the city, after all, and now for her. They deserve to be taken care of.

At the same time, the longer she sits there, kicking her feet and staring at the blank walls, the more nervous she gets. She hasn’t healed that many people. There were a few accidental healings when she was young, but other than the arthritis those were all scrapes and bruises and one common cold. Then came the years at the facility, when she wasn’t allowed to even think about using her power.

While she was on the streets, she’d healed twice - both times with an enormous amount of fear that someone was going to leap out into the open and drag her back to the facility for doing so. The first time was the worst thing she’d ever healed. A lady had gotten mugged in an alleyway, and Liliana had healed where the mugger had hit her over the head with the butt of his gun. The only reason she’d stepped in and shoved her fear aside then was because she was afraid the woman might die otherwise. The headache she’d gotten from that was horrendous and lasted for a few days straight. Not something that she was looking to repeat anytime soon.

The second time she did with slightly less trepidation, since there hadn’t been consequences for the first. That was the man with the broken glass, the time when she’d met Nari and Quinn. The pain from that wasn’t all that bad, just a few stinging cuts. She still has the little white scars on her stomach.

And the only other time she’s healed was Jamil’s broken nose, which had been nerve-racking, too, but she was the one who’d broken it so she had to offer to heal it. That had hurt for days, too, and she kept feeling like she couldn’t breathe.

Today could be her first official healing, though. Her first time really performing her new job.

When she’d agreed to join their team, it had been a spur of the moment decision. A decision she’s second guessed many times, for reasons ranging from I shouldn’t have moved in with a bunch of strangers to they need someone better than me, someone with less problems than me.

Now, in this moment, she’s second guessing her ability to handle the kinds of injuries a team of superheroes might come in with. They could have broken bones. They could get shot, stabbed, burned, impaled, electrocuted…the villains they fight against have all varieties of powers that can do a ton of damage. Can she really heal any and all of that? More importantly, can she do it without letting on that it hurts, for however long it may take for those things to heal?

She doesn’t have a choice. They let her in so that she could heal them. If she can’t do it, then she’ll get kicked out, and she’s not sure she can handle going back to the streets, losing all of this comfort and care that she’s finally starting to get used to. And she can’t let them know that it hurts her, they’ll think she’s too weak and the result would be exactly the same.

It isn’t that they’re mean. They’re the nicest people she’s ever met. But they need someone who can do this job. She has to make sure that’s her, so she won’t lose even more people and yet another place to live.

The wait is excruciating, but eventually she hears the beeping and opening of the front door from just down the hall. Jumping to her feet, she moves to the doorway, wringing her gloved hands as she peers out. One, two, three, four…they’re all on their feet. It doesn’t mean no one is injured at all, but it’s certainly not as bad as it could be.

Quinn’s face brightens when he sees her. “Liliana, hey.” His eyes dart toward the room behind her. “Everything alright?”

She nods, still glancing up and down at what she can see of all of them. “I’m just, just waiting. For, um…for you guys to get back. Just in case.”

“Oh, that’s perfect. We’re mostly in one piece, but Alex did break a rib or two.” He gestures back toward the redhead, who she can see now is pressing one hand to his side.

“Ehh, I think they’re just cracked.” He waves his free hand casually. “Nothing new for me, honestly. I get beat up a lot.” He laughs at his own joke, then winces in clear regret.

Liliana’s eyes widen. Cracked ribs. She can handle that, right? She’s never had injured ribs before, but if Alex can treat it so nonchalantly then maybe she can, too. She definitely doesn’t want him to keep being in pain, it makes her stomach churn watching him react.

“I can, I can help. That’s what, um, what I’m here for, r-right?”

He grins at her and enters the infirmary as she steps back to make room. “I’d really appreciate it, if you think you’re up for it.” Gingerly, he settles on the cot facing her. “I’m used to having to deal with these things for weeks. If you can really make it disappear in an instant…”

“Mhm.” She nods again, still toying with her fingers. She’s just standing there, and he’s sitting, watching her…waiting on her, she realizes. Everyone is waiting on her. The other three are crowded into the room behind her, ready to watch her perform her task.

Right. She can do this. Gloves have to come off…well, maybe just one. One glove off, then she has to…oh, shoot, she has to ask him to…

“Um. I, um…I n-need…” Her face is growing hot. “I-I have to, to…to touch…like, um…s-skin…”

His eyebrows go up in realization. “Oh! Yeah, no problem.” He lifts the bottom hem of his shirt, revealing a cluster of bruises on his right side. “And don’t worry about hurting me, I’m tough.”

Her cheeks are still burning. “It, um, it shouldn’t hurt.”

“It doesn’t!” Jamil pipes in from the doorway. “At least it didn’t for me. Barely felt a thing.”

“Oh right! I forgot you’ve done this before.” Alex leans over slightly to see him. “Is it cool?”

“Definitely. Though I didn’t get to actually, you know…see it. I’m looking forward to it this time.”

The others are agreeing, and Liliana wants to curl up in a hole somewhere and disappear. They’re all acting like this is some huge special thing that she can do, and it’s just…her power. The power that got her kicked out of her family and locked up for three years. Yes, if she has to have a power she’s glad that it’s one that helps people, but it’s not special. It’s not that big of a deal.

“Okay, I’m, I’m gonna…” She motions toward his ribs and steps forward, sliding the glove from her fingers. Her hand is shaking a little.

Ever so gently, she places her fingertips against the bruised skin. Blue light immediately spreads across the area, soaking up the black and purple, seeping down until it reaches the cracked bones and beginning to mend them.

Don’t make a face, don’t make a face, don’t make a face.

The pain of her ribs “cracking” is sharp and immediately invades every breath. Liliana bites down on the inside of her lip to keep from gasping or making any noise.

Cállate, cállate, no hagas ruido, no pueden averiguar.

She glances up at Alex’s face, but his head is tilted down to watch the healing. Good. If she did slip and make any kind of expression, no one would have seen.

The light fades away as the last of the pain transfers, and she lets her hand drop, quickly moving to put her glove back on. “How’s, um…how’s it feel?”

His gaze comes up, and his eyes are wide with amazement. “Wow.” He stretches his arms over his head, bends his torso back and forth. She knows for a fact that those movements would have been very painful a minute ago.

“It feels great! It’s…totally gone, like, not even a trace left.” Looking down and pulling his shirt up again, he runs his fingers over the now unblemished skin. “That’s crazy.”

The others crowd around, Jamil poking at Alex and Nari making teasing comments about how he just can’t keep himself from getting hurt, and Liliana shrinks backwards, out of the way. Sharp pain shoots through her ribs with any little twist of her body. She’s going to have to learn how she can and can’t move, but try her best not to look stiff in the meantime.

A few weeks, he said, right? She can do this. It’ll be fine.

Alex stands and pushes his way past the others, not a difficult feat considering how much space his height and muscles take up. “Seriously, Lil, you’re fantastic.” He chuckles to himself. “Get it? Lil? ‘Cause you’re so…lil? I’m calling you Lil from now on. Anyway, I’d hug you, but you probably don’t want me to and that’s fine, so…fist bump? Can we fist bump it?”

She definitely does not want a hug right now, not with cracked ribs, but…she can handle a fist bump, she thinks. Tentatively, she raises her fist, and Alex gently knocks his knuckles into hers.

“Welcome officially to the team, kid. It’s great to have you here.”

Everyone spills out of the room exclaiming similar messages, making a huge deal out of what she just did and her presence with them. Liliana follows along silently, cheeks flushed again, trying not to let the praise get to her.

She still wishes they wouldn’t make such a big deal out of it. But if her power can make them this happy, then she’s very glad she can share it with them. Even if it ends up hurting much worse in the future.

#querencia #liliana the healer #alex the hero #quinn the leader #jamil the hero #nari the hero #lady whump #lady whumpee #dude whump #broken ribs #self deprecating thoughts #hidden injury #found family #team as family #whump writing #whump series #superheroes #hero whumpee

[invisibleraven]

things you said at the kitchen table for Rulie, please

Dinners were never a quiet affair in the Molina household. Ray used it as a time to catch up with his kids, ask about their days, tell them about his. Yes there was still an empty space at the table for Rose, and it hurt every time to look across and not see her smiling at him, but it didn't ache quite so badly as time went on.

Then Julie starting bring the guys from her band home for dinner. None of them had great home lives, so Ray was more than happy to provide them with a decent meal, even if it was just his spaghetti, and a caring adult. They didn't come every night, but they were there often enough Ray was forced to increase his grocery budget and the number of recipes he knew.

But the guys, and more importantly, Julie, appreciated it, and that was more than enough for him.

However, it did not escape Ray's notice that Reggie stayed over more than Luke or Alex did. Nor did he fail to see the lovesick expression on the boy's face whenever he looked at Julie when she wasn't looking. Or the mirror of it on hers.

Ray remembered those first days fondly. The do they like me like that agony and the getting together that made the pining all the sweeter. He and Rose had danced around each other for a bit before he finally asked her out, and she had given him a fond 'finally' before kissing him in agreement.

Reggie was a good guy, and he would treat Julie well, of that he had no doubt. But Ray also was getting tired of them not making a move after months of hearing Julie's lovesick playlists and snippets of Reggie's pining country songs.

So he decided to give them a little nudge.

"So how's school?" he asked one night when it was just them and Carlos sitting down to eat.

Julie launched into a tale of her awful math teacher, and how much she hated calculus, with Reggie interjecting about how he could help her, since he was doing a more advanced math course this year.

"Thanks Reg, I'd really appreciate that," Julie replied, a soft blush painting her cheeks.

"Of course Julie, anything for you."

Ray bit the inside of his cheek, because come on, how obvious could you get? "Any gigs coming up?"

"We have a few next month," Reggie enthused. "Plus Principal Lessa asked us to play at Prom."

"Well that's exciting," Ray commented. He had been hearing about prom for weeks now, had taken Julie and Flynn dress shopping not too long ago, and he knew the guys had gone on their own suit shopping adventure as well.

"Luke isn't too jazzed, but we had a band vote and it was three to one," Julie said.

"Pity that means you won't get to dance at your own prom though," Ray replied.

"Oh no, Flynn is gonna DJ between our sets, so we all get a chance to dance," Reggie said. "And I think Dirty Candi are gonna play some songs too, so it'll be really cool."

"So who are you going with Reggie?" Ray asked, totally not looking at Julie who was giving him a wide eyed look of panic.

"Oh um... I haven't asked anyone yet. Might just go stag," Reggie said with a shrug. He was also avoiding looking at Julie, and Ray could see the tips of his ears turning pink.

"Any news on your date mija?" Ray asked.

"I might just third wheel Flynn and Carrie. No one has asked me," Julie replied, her eyes firmly on Reggie, but it seemed the boy wasn't getting the hint.

"Your mother and I didn't meet until college, but there was a dance for some society or another one night. Almost like a prom, and she asked me," Ray recalled. "We had a lovely time."

With that, he got up from the table, leaving the two of them there, blushing and finally catching each other's eyes. As tempted as he was, Ray didn't eavesdrop, instead busying himself in his office with work.

He saw Reggie leave, staggering down the walkway towards his bike, a iridescent smile on his face. And Julie in the doorway, her lipgloss a little smeared, and an equally blissful look on her face.

"Reggie's taking me to prom," she said with a sigh.

"As a friend?" Ray asked with a knowing smirk.

"Nope," she replied, popping the p.

"Well it's about time," he said. "I'm happy for you mija."

"Thanks papi," she said. "Good night!"

Ray wished her the same, and smiled to himself when he heard music drift down the stairs-and it was decidedly more happy than her last playlist, so he'd count that as a win.

And on prom night he got a shot of them sitting to the kitchen table, in all their finery, rubbing noses over a stage plate of spaghetti, looking happier than Ray had ever seen them.

And figured he had better just start setting a place for Reggie at the table from then on.

#filled prompts #ficlet #rulie #julie and the phantoms

[mermaidsirennikita]

Charithra is foul for following JD after the verdict (and then unfollowing when called out) but the giddy reaction to finally having a valid reason to hate her from the Bridgerton fandom was sooo telling.

I mean, Luke Newton apparently liked a Depp-supporting post too but that's not making the rounds.

Here's how I feel about this shit.

I hesitate to say that it's disappointing when famous people do shitty things, because the reality is that we don't know any of these people and they work in an industry that actively encourages you to abandon all morals, so. Not surprising. We should never give people cookies for doing one good thing when for all we know they're doing five shitty things we don't know about.

Everyone who is liking posts supporting Depp, following Depp, whatever, is on my shit list. Does that mean I will never watch anything they ever are in ever again? No, because a) because even the people who don't support Depp? Likely support something else that I think is awful b) I will leave some room for nuance here. I know decent people who have been misled by the misinformation, and I am not unaware that some celebrities are likely genuinely misinformed. I have followed people, then realized they were shitty, and unfollowed.

However. If you are in an industry that functions on misinformation--if you have been the victim of misinformation campaigns, as many celebrities have been, if not on as wide a scale as Amber has been, you know how this works. These people weren't born yesterday. The younger ones grew up with social media and understand how easily it can be used to lie; and the older ones grew up with Johnny Depp and the stories of his hideous behavior well before Amber was on the scene.

Basically, I think that the vast majority of them just want to get brownie points for backing the new face of male DV survivors, while not actually caring about DV survivors, and that's gross as fuck. I anticipate their apologies after the inevitable Framing Amber documentary in a decade or so, but it's hollow and this really just proves how unintellectual and shallow many of these individuals tend to be. Which? Again, not surprising. These are entertainers. Some of them are super smart, and some of them are dumb as shit, but none of them are required to engage intellectually in order to do their jobs correctly.

That being said, fair is fair. A lot of people I liked have been liking those posts. I love The Great and Our Flag Means Death--Elle Fanning and Taika Waititi liked pro-Depp posts. I can't promise you that I'll suddenly drop those shows, because there are definitely ways around supporting them financially, and I think there was already a level of supporting the art without supporting the artist going on there. I don't know where I'm going to end up with all of that, and I don't judge anyone for doing what they will with it either way. But do I think Elle and Taika and Charithra and Luke are being moronic assholes? Yeah, I do. They all are. Charithra being an asshole over this doesn't mean that she hasn't been treated badly, however, and it doesn't mean that she hasn't made good points about other issues in the past.

This just in: people are, as a general rule, a mixed bag. I think Elizabeth Warren is one of the best politicians the U.S. has to offer... and I think her claim of Native American heritage was fucked up and stupid. Both things can be true. I can think that any of the above people may or may not have acting ability and make points about other things--and I can think they're absolutely fucked for supporting Depp. The reality is that everyone's line in the sand about where they withdraw support is individual. But if someone I disliked because I think they're a shitty actor supported Depp, I wouldn't suddenly act as if I had a moral righteousness in disliking that person. If I already disliked you, I don't win because you're supporting an abuser. Nobody wins when someone supports an abuser.

#like to be clear i think the vast majority of people supporting depp are doing like #very callow favor currying with his fanbase #they don't give a fuck about him or the issues he supposedly represents... at all