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gimmethatagustd · 1 year

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hi!! it was my birthday yesterday so i decided to come to one of my fav author and request smth :p i was thinking a sub! jk smut where he’s not feeling well and sucks on reader’s tits for comfort ? 👀 idk if u’re comfortable with kinks, but a mommy kink would go sooo well w this 😭 thank you in advance!

antidote | jjk

You know exactly how to make your boyfriend feel better when he's feeling down, but he has his own plans.

» pairing: sub!jungkook x soft dom(f)!reader

» genre: BTS | 18+ | established relationship | pwp | fluffy smut

» wc/date: 2.3k | January 2023

» notes: i'm ngl i haven't ever written something like this before, so i hope i did it justice and that it was everything you wanted! happy belated birthday, friend 😌💜🎂 i'm honored to be one of your fav authors and write this for you!! it made me really happy to see this request

» masterlist | AO3 | send me ur thots 👅

» what was jai listening to? mmh - kai

“What’s wrong, baby?”

“Kinda sad,” Jungkook whispers. “Dunno why.”

The two of you are cuddled in bed, Jungkook lying in between your legs to rest his head on your stomach. You’re not sure how long you’ve been there, all tangled limbs and gentle touches.

It’s not unusual for your boyfriend to fall into moods like this. While he has always been a bit shy, sometimes feelings overwhelm him. You try to be attentive and you never force him to talk about his feelings unless he wants to. Sometimes it even makes him feel physically unwell, especially when he overworks himself.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You offer, just in case.

Jungkook shakes his head. The two of you lie on the bed in silence for a few minutes, only the sound of your breathing heard in the room. Jungkook twists his fingers in the hem of your t-shirt, his knuckles occasionally brushing against your skin.

“Need you close.”

You almost don’t hear his whisper, but he’s so close and the rumble of his chest against your body signals that he’s talking. When you peer down, he’s avoiding your gaze. You know what he’s asking for without him having to say it; his unwillingness to remove his face from hiding behind his sleeved arm is telling.

With a small laugh, you give in to his silent request.

“Come here.”

Jungkook lets out a small whimper of satisfaction as he scoots closer to you. One of his arms slips beneath you so he can press his hand against the small of your back. The placement forces you to arch your spine and you allow yourself to loosen up in his hold. It feels nice to be enveloped in the warmth of his embrace, lost in the heavy scent of his cologne that makes your nose tingle.

The thin material of your t-shirt clings to your body, doing nothing to hide the way your nipples harden under Jungkook’s touch. Except, he hasn’t even touched you yet. Not there.

He must not feel that bad because he’s wearing a cheeky little smirk as he brings his face to your chest.

“It’s cold in here,” you snap with a playful roll of your eyes, already knowing what he’s thinking. “Don’t give me that look.”

An unspoken threat you’re both all too familiar with lingers in the air.

Jungkook’s lips pucker into an innocent, albeit exaggerated, pout. From the moment you met him, you knew by his pouty lips that he’d cause you trouble. Those sparkling Bambi eyes are the final nail in the coffin.

But what’s worse than all of his innocence combined is the way Jungkook’s face easily morphs into a sly grin half obstructed by his teeth capturing his bottom lip into a bite as he practically moans, “Yes, mommy.”

You don’t want to admit that you don’t know what to say. Jungkook never teases you. He’s always so compliant and eager to the point of being whiny. You’re the one who finds pleasure in teasing him.

Stunned into silence, you watch Jungkook lean into your chest. His eyes flutter close as he presses his cheek to your tits before slowly turning his face to run his nose along each mound. His bottom lip gets caught on the fabric of your t-shirt, pulling downward as he moves his face. It’s cute how it exposes his bunny teeth.

You let out a shuddered breath when Jungkook reaches up with his tattooed hand to squeeze one of your tits— the one he isn’t currently smothering himself with.

“So soft,” he mumbles, nuzzling your chest. “You’re so warm and safe.”

Your body tenses when his nose brushes over one of your nipples and Jungkook tightens his grip around your waist.

“Can I, mommy? Please?”

Your breath gets caught in your throat when those big, sparkling, innocent eyes shine up at you. He always looks so precious begging, even when he’s being a little shit about it.

“Mmm, of course. Want my baby boy to feel better.”

Though, what really has you speechless is the way Jungkook can look at you with such innocence while his teeth graze your hardened nipple through your clothes. He maintains eye contact with you as he unwraps his arm from your waist. Using both hands, he slowly pulls your t-shirt off, tossing it to the floor.

Jungkook looks tired; now that you’re up close, you can see the bags under his eyes. They make guilt wrack your heart. You haven’t paid enough attention to your baby, somehow letting him work himself ragged.

There’s no time for feeling sorry, though. Jungkook immediately attaches himself to you. His tongue is hot and wet as he runs it across your nipple. He makes sure to flatten his tongue as he licks you. The technique means he’s able to flick the small, stainless steel ball of his tongue piercing against your nipple. You let out a breathy moan at the sensation. It’s a new one; Jungkook had only recently gotten the piercing. Now that it’s completely healed he’s been having a fun time learning all the ways he can use it beyond just looking pretty.

Tilting his head, he swirls his tongue around your nipple, puckering his lips to suck your tit into his mouth. He continues massaging the skin with his tongue, every suck of his lips making his lip piercing scrape against your sensitive skin. It doesn’t hurt, only serves as a reminder of how fucking hot your boyfriend is.

“You’re so adorable, baby boy,” you say softly. When you run your fingers through his fluffy hair he hums against your skin.

Encouraged, Jungkook snuggles closer to you, one hand gently holding your waist while the other massages the tit he isn’t suckling. You know he loves the praise without having to see how pink his cheeks are, but it’s still nice to see the effect you have on him. It isn’t the only way for you to receive validation, though. Jungkook shifts his body weight and you feel his hard cock press against the inside of your thigh.

“Mommy.” Jungkook lifts his head to watch you with bright eyes. His lips are swollen and pink. When your eyes drop to admire them, he squirms in your embrace. “Let me be inside you, please?”

“Will that make you feel better?” You question him with a raised eyebrow, not ready to give in. He squirms again. “Or are you just trying to trick me into fucking you?”

“No!” Jungkook whines.

“Are you sure?”

He nods his head hard enough to make his bangs fall into his eyes. You run your fingers through them, brushing them away from his face so you can see his eyes properly again. They’re bright and, paired with his furrowed eyebrows, make his desperation obvious.

You fight the urge to rip his clothes off right there. Instead, you lean back against the pillows and give him a small smile.

“Take my underwear off for me?”

It’s posed as a question but you both know it’s not. Jungkook scrambles to pull the clothing down your legs. His eyes flit between your parted thighs and his own crotch as if he’s trying to decide what to focus on first.

“Come on, baby boy. Mommy’s cold without you.”

That gets him moving.

Jungkook pulls off his sweatshirt and joggers, his briefs flying with them onto the floor. Sometimes you push him to spend more time begging, but today you just want to remove the frown from his beautiful face.

You try to keep in the moan that builds up in your chest when Jungkook slips a finger inside your pussy. The surprised sound he makes when he finds you already soaking wet is too delicious to not react to, but you keep it together. Even after he slides two more fingers inside of you. Luckily, he keeps a hand on your waist, pressing you into the bed to prevent you from moving if you try to buck your hips. You don’t, though. You know all he’s doing is making sure you’re relaxed enough for his cock. Still, he’s suspiciously maintaining a steady rhythm against your front wall. You’re not complaining, but you know if he keeps it up, you’re going to cum and this is supposed to be about him.

“Jungkook,” you scold. His eyes widen from getting caught.

“Sorry, mommy. You’re just so wet…” There’s that cheeky smile again, so sly and deceiving.

“Don’t make me change my mind, baby.”

He nods quickly, but you’re not convinced he’s going to behave when he leans forward to roll his hips into yours. Again, you know he’s just prepping by smearing your arousal onto his cock with every movement, but he’s pushing it. A raise of your eyebrows makes him reach between your bodies to finally line his cock with your entrance. It’s cute how his teeth dig into his bottom lip as he slowly bottoms out.

A soft moan slips out of you despite your efforts to stay quiet, but Jungkook only smirks.

“Feels good,” he says softly as he settles back on top of you. His face finds your chest again, lips wrapping around one of your nipples while his arms wrap around your waist.

“Good,” you say with a sigh. You return to playing with his hair. “You’re doing so good for mommy, hmm?”

As much as having Jungkook inside of you while you cuddle is meant to make him feel comfortable and safe, you can’t deny that it’s good for you, too. You like feeling full of him, as close as you possibly can be to him. Coupled with the weight of his body against yours, there’s not much you love more than this.

The silence between the two of you is comforting, though you occasionally break it to give Jungkook more praise. He hums with satisfaction, and it’s nice to be gentle and vulnerable.

After a while, Jungkook shifts to adjust the way he’s holding you. The movement forces his hips to press into yours, driving his cock a bit deeper inside of you. The suddenness makes you gasp.

“Sorry,” he whispers against your throat where his face has migrated. “Arms were falling asleep.”

You open your mouth to accept his apology, but a moan tumbles out instead of words. Instinctually, you dig your fingers into Jungkook’s scalp to hold onto his hair.

“Jungkook,” you scold with another gasp.

He ignores you and continues subtly thrusting into you. It’s slow and deep, his hips barely lifting from yours to dive back into your pussy. He reaches deep inside you, grinding into you with the small circling of his hips.

“Sorry, sorry,” he pants, lips wet against your throat, but he doesn’t stop moving.

The slowness of his movements is driving you mad. Your clit has already been throbbing and hot pressed against Jungkook’s pelvic bone while you lay in silence. It doesn’t help that his hands start roaming your sides, squeezing your waist to hold you in place.

“Mommy, just, please, please let me fuck you.”

His panting is getting whinier and more high-pitched. Every slow thrust is companied by the neediest chanting of “ahh, ah, ahh” in time with the movement of his hips.

“Fuck, Jungkook.” You throw your head back when his hips start slapping into you harder. He pulls back, pounding into you with more fervor.

“I need you,” he practically sobs. His lips scatter kisses down your chest, eventually finding your nipples to suck again.

By this point he’s fucking into you with full force, one hand squeezing your thigh to hold your leg against his hip. His blunt nails dig into your skin, but you don’t care. You're a moaning mess beneath him. Your plan of having a peaceful moment of intimacy with your boyfriend is shattered.

“Harder,” you moan, tugging his hair.

You rip him from your tits to bring his face to yours, crashing your lips into his. It’s nowhere near a proper kiss. The two of you are moaning too much. You keep your mouths hanging open to at least brush against each other, occasionally licking into each other. Jungkook does his best to keep you from inching upwards, but with how hard he’s fucking into you it’s inevitable.

“Wanna, wanna,” Jungkook digs his teeth into your shoulder. “Wanna make you feel good.”

You’re already close, so hearing Jungkook’s sweet, whiny promises is all it takes to have you clenching around his cock. You arch into his chest as you cum, doing your best to encourage him to let go, too, in between moans of his name.

Like the good boy that he is, Jungkook holds out until you’re laid back and boneless in his arms before he cums with the cutest sob of a moan into the crook of your neck. He collapses onto you, arms once again wrapping around your waist to hold you tighter against him. Little hums against your skin tell you that he’s satisfied, but you still ask.

“Are you feeling okay, baby boy?” His bangs are sweaty, but you don’t stop running your fingers through them. He leans into the touch, so you keep it up.

“Mhmm,” he hums, pressing a kiss against your neck and raising goosebumps over your already hot skin. “Thank you, mommy.”

He promises to clean you up after he’s done getting his fill of cuddling. His cock softens inside of you; you’re happy he doesn’t pull out. You both crave closeness, and you’ve got all the time in the world to bask in it.

do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my work

#jungkook x reader #bts fanfic #bts x reader #jungkook fanfic #jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #bts fluff #bts smut #jai writes #gimmethatagustd #antidote #drabble request #jai asks #Anonymous

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birchbow · 5 months

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Hi, I'm obsessed with untoxxics senior apprentice, can we please know everything about them (also veneno continues to be hot as hell ty for sharing 😍)

Could easily have a poisoncraft posting on another ship by now if she wanted. Knows an enormous amount and mysteriously forgets it all when everybody is testing their knowledge to graduate to a full posting. How weird.

There's no official hierarchy but if there was she'd be Untoxxic's right-hand troll and therefore pretty damn authoritative.

Combat gear includes a big pack of various mediculler supplies, toxins, antitoxins and the balm that helps with the neuropathy in Veneno's feet because they never bring it themself and who will help them with their pain if they can never even admit to anybody that they're in pain

Got her arm chewed on by a venomous plant on an alien planet shortly after pupation; had no idea what to do except claw it off and burn the wound shut, and by the time she got back to the ship the medicullers chopped even more off to make some kind of clean amputation out of the mess.

getting into poisons and venoms was both a grim fascination with the thing that took her arm, and also a more precision-based form of griefing that she could take up while she was down an arm, to avoid getting culled while she healed.

Frilled lizard lusus is actually still around; she's modestly-sized and incredibly elderly. Her saliva is both full of bacteria and venomous, and has produced lots of fun toxic mixtures for fleet use.

Has a drone season "arrangement" with Untoxxic that is. Of course. Just for convenience. They are both feeling very professional about it, and she has no emotions about this at all. It's simply. Very convenient.

Went from two thumbs to one thumb to three thumbs. Who needs pinkies?? Put another thumb on there instead.

#ask time!#art time!#price of forgiveness #Charoa Tidoto #''Tidoto'' is from the greek word that antidote was based on but also it sounds like 'to dote on' which I think is very fitting lol

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lotus-pear · 7 months

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i actually have not been able to stop thinking about the teaser im going completely feral . actually gonna die when i watch the new ep i think .

i've had sm on my mind lately that it drifts in and out i'm mostly excited for fyolai reunion i'm praying w literally all my heart that nothing bad happens to them on the way out of of meursault

#i think the doa is just meeting up again bc why else would they be in a helicopter?? they're probably going to join fukuchi #yea. everything is fine #but. that antidote was the only one in the world. if fyodor gets it dazai's a goner fs :(#even more so than he alr was #do i want fyodor to live just so dazai can die? no. do i want dazai to live but it will result in fyodor's death? also no.#nikolai cmon you should've made two antidotes what if there was tie😭#chuuya and dazai are unsupervised in meursault tho now.. so maybe we'll get some rly homoerotic shit next chp hopefully #lotus's asks

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asteralley · 1 year

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While I don’t disagree that Shinichi especially early on feels out of sorts in his six year old’s body again I do think he does eventually get use to it. I think it’s closer to the weirdness after an extremely different hair cut than something like gender dysphoria. More intense than a haircut of course because it comes with a lot of disadvantages (though also a few advantages as well mainly I think in having a bigger friend group as Conan than Shinichi.) but very little he can’t compensate for.

Yeah, as time passes Shinichi gets used to being treated as a child. He used to fight against and was embarrassed by headpats, holding Ran's hand, and being picked up. But nowadays he's gotten used to the treatment and freely uses his childish persona to his advantage.

I think the main source of Shinichi’s crisis is the loss of his old life. Day by day he's missing out on the time he could be spending in his original body. In chapter 457 Conan goes to Teitan for a case and Ran & Sonoko talk to their classmates at the entrance. He instinctively wants to join the conversation but can't, and he's clearly saddened by this.

Kaito’s situation is a bit better. He lives both of his lives at the same time, switching between being a high schooler and a phantom thief. Shinichi doesn't have that luxury and is forced to always live as Conan.

The idea of being forced in a life you never asked for and having to abandon your old one is pretty horrifying. Kir is the same way in this case. She thought she would only be undercover in the organization for a short time but ended up having to stay longer. Akai and Amuro differ because they willingly signed up to be NOCs.

How would he feel, every time Shinichi looks in the mirror and sees someone else completely different? It's technically his face, but it's wrong. Eventually he would start to despise it, blame the other face for taking his life away. I always come back to this scene from episode 193:

Shinichi is trying desperately to hold onto himself, to keep himself together. But when he looks in the mirror, "Conan" is waiting, counting down the seconds on the clock. Counting down until Shinichi's time is up.

I have a personal hc that Shinichi is afraid of Conan. Afraid of how much he's taking over his life. He created Conan as a fake identity to hide his situation from others, but slowly the line is being blurred. Conan has formed genuine relationships and it would be difficult to just return to his original body without resolving things as Conan. OVA 9 The Stranger from 10 Years Later touches on this idea of Shinichi being completely removed in place of Conan:

(I also want to add this pained expression he has when reminiscing on a memory with Ran)

#WOW that ended up being kinda long huh #I also think it's interesting that whenever the antidote is wearing off Shinichi says ''I can't turn back into Conan''#instead of ''I can't get shrunken again''#he mentally separates the two identities and refuses to accept Conan as part of himself #(I actually use this idea for a p4 x detco AU where Shinichi has to confront his shadow that looks like Conan hehe)#dcmk #asks

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cxpperhead · 7 months

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Off topic but I'm strongly considering retconning Copperhead's type of venom? In Suicide: Path to Hell, it was shown to be acidic but it wasn't natural venom, rather being a part of Sameer's body modification. In the comics, Copperhead's venom was a powerful neurotoxin capable of paralyzing victims and causing death within 30 minutes of envenomation but again, it wasn't natural because the venom was part of the suit so I'm thinking that as his venom is natural, it shouldn't be acidic but WILL fuck you up and very quickly if left untreated?

#🐍 || musings #Thinking today is the day I finish off Copperhead's about since now I've got a day or two off finally #And it's been begging to be completed #Not going to be in the right headspace to tackle drafts or asks much because I didn't sleep much after getting home past 5am #Slept at 7 woke up at 11 #So I'm tiredddd #Thinking about Copperhead's venom got me wondering though #It should be hella dangerous even if he's just spitting at you but getting bitten is certainly very bad news #And getting an antidote is HARD because there's no other metahuman like Copperhead #His venom is unique #Batman could create an antidote and quickly bc he's Batman but #Sorry I'm just in funky headspaces today

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whotookmysenbon · 1 month

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so… do you always take care of kakashi when he’s feeling a bit.. not well? I want some examples of what you do for him since you’re such a mother hen

Sweet Sage! I’ve told you little cretins before: mother henning doesn’t just apply to Hatake. I do it to everyone. Hatake just tends to be the one who needs it the most at any given time.

#I try to though #usually he’s not super receptive to visitors so he ignores me #or has me come in and just sit next to him as I work on paperwork or tip my senbon #sometimes he just wants to he held by another human who *understands* on some level what he’s struggling with #(although usually the dogs ask me for him in that case since he would never admit that aloud)#but that’s not something specific to Kakashi #none of that is #I do the same for Anko and Hayate and Raidou and Ram and Rat and Ebisu and Gai and Iruka and Asuma #any of my friends who just need someone else there in that moment #or I’m making extra food and dropping it off #leaving antidotes in mission packs #watering their plants and restocking their fridges when they’re on a mission #making sure they’re not coming home to a dusty and dead apartment #genma shiranui #shiranui genma #kakashi hatake #hatake kakashi #mother hen genma shiranui #anbu shenanigans #tokubetsu jonins shenanigans #anbu genma shiranui

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hellcifrogs · 9 months

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Is Kankuro a doctor in the Narufox au? Because if he isn't then I don't understand how he's gonna help Yashamaru with the healing. I adore the idea of ambassador/diplomat and probably now even doctor? Kankuro. I just got curious, because I always thought that he had good enough Chakra to be a healer, and he just looks like the kind of person who would be good at patching people up. Like, of the 3 sand sibs, Kanks the only one who seems like he'd make a good doctor. Perhaps not on Sakura's level ofc, but maybe on Ino's or Shizune's perhaps? Thanks anyways for all your work, you're awesome!

Yes and No ; A;)

He's a poison specialist guys!! I'm sorry it didn't cross my mind to actually make him a medic nin, but I have to agree he'd make a great one~

#nrfx ask #im a little mad at myself for that lol #he can help with poisons!!#antidotes*

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baltharino · 1 year

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Femslash February Day 3: ‘Plausible Deniability’ Kiss

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antidotenurse · 11 months

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Can you do request arts?

#antidote asks

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jomiddlemarch · 1 year

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Except you enthrall me, never shall be free

III. By the end of the first week, Alina began to ask questions.

Aleksander answered the simplest and brought her a collection of books chosen by the Little Palace librarian, an austere personage rarely seen and evenly more rarely stymied in the search for texts. He arranged for a daily tea-service with a novel selection of fruits and pastries, and scheduled her time away from Master Botkin’s training rooms. He was delighted and proud, smiling enough that Ivan scowled and inquired if General Kirigan had received some particularly important intelligence from Ketterdam.

By the end of the second week, Alina’s questions continued unabated and Aleksander had begun to take a deep breath before he opened the door to her room. Her curiosity was admirable but, though it grieved him to admit it to himself, exhausting, wide-ranging and unchecked, her initial wary hesitance having been praised and coaxed away by him; he read in Fedyor’s eyes and Genya’s that he had only himself to hold responsible for Alina’s questions, though Fedyor was kind enough to tell him the younglings would likely be much the same, except that Dame Baghra birched them so soundly they’d learned a discretion that was entirely foreign to Alina.

By the end of the month, Aleksander was beside himself. The expression was apt; he sometimes felt Alina was some alternate version of himself, the way he had been as Eryk and Anton, inquisitive and irrepressible, eager and buoyed by his own eagerness. And he sometimes felt he might tear out his hair if she asked another question he couldn’t answer or didn’t answer to her satisfaction. He had hoped for her, wished for her for such a long, long time, but the euphoria of her discovery and his relief at her survival were tempered now by the person she was, the reality of a peer more discomfiting than he had anticipated.

“For Saints’ sake, Alina—”

“Do you mean it, when you call on them?” she interrupted. “I wouldn’t have thought so—aren’t they, weren’t at least some of them your contemporaries? It would be like me calling on…Zoya, I guess, if she hadn’t tried to pummel me—”

“She tried to pummel you?”

Alina waved her hand in a universally recognizable it-was-nothing gesture and he felt the shift of light and dark echoing within him, saw her wrist encircled with the old betrothal tattoos of the eastern fells, gold against gold, and it was enough to keep him from permanently exiling Nazyalensky.

“Please don’t distract me,” she said. “You never answered my first question—”

“It wasn’t your first question,” he muttered under his breath and she smiled, undeterred. He’d given her that, that confidence to persist in asking instead of offering to be quiet, and it mitigated his irritation somewhat.

“Why do we need the actual Fold anymore? Hasn’t its power, your power, been adequately demonstrated by this point and wouldn’t removing it be even more terrifying to other nation-states and factions?” Alina asked. Aleksander had been tried in several courts over his lifetime and suddenly was put in mind of that advocate in Ulensk in his tall fur hat and cloak, his interrogation subtle, effective as a finely woven net. “Aren’t we losing more than we gain from it, given the percentage of travelers who don’t survive the crossing?”

“You just asked me four questions,” he pointed out.

“You’re stalling,” she replied. It was true, so he made no attempt at a rebuttal.

“You propose I simply remove the Fold,” he said. “As if those words could make any actual sense.”

“I haven’t figured out the logistics, I suppose something with merzost, not the bad kind, would work, or maybe that Fabrikator David would have some ideas. He’s very bright, you know,” she said. Aleksander was tempted to lower his head to the vicinity of his knees.

“Alina, it wouldn’t be easy for me,” he said. Could he come back from wherever he would need to go to accomplish such a feat? Would he be himself when he returned? What consequences would he fail to account for, what new disaster might he bring down upon them all?

“It wouldn’t be for you to do alone, Sashenka,” she said, using the familiar form of his name no one had dared or bothered with for years. It was as dear as a kiss, a reminder that she was his equal. “We could do it together, it would look so sudden and swift no one would be able to make any sense of it. That exercise of power, it would make it clear to the world that we may act beyond any diplomacy or negotiation if we believe we must. I don’t know about the volcra though, do you think they’d be able to become human again? Or are they their own creatures now and how could we find a way to co-exist with them? I can see it going either way and the chief Healer might have some ideas we could work with, if we consider them injured. Or we could see what the diplomatic corps has to offer—do you think the volcra would want sovereignty over the region that was the Unsea?”

“This is impossible,” he said.

“It was impossible. Now it’s possible if improbable,” she said. She leaned forward and touched her hand very lightly to his cheek and then his shoulder. Even without his being an amplifier, it would have felt like an embrace. She wrinkled her forehead in thought and he braced himself against the next onslaught and her absolute loveliness. Shadows collected in the corners of the room and began to encircle them, drawing them closer. He looked at his own hands, loosely folded in his lap, and saw the shimmer of light across his palms. She lifted her chin and held his gaze with her own. “Have you ever considered you’ve got merzost all wrong, Sasha?”

“And they called me the Black Heretic,” he said.

“I thought that was you, but I wasn’t sure,” she said. “It’s just, everyone who’s used merzost so far, I think, haven’t they all been on their own?”

He nodded.

“But we wouldn’t be. Maybe it wouldn’t have worked, even for us, if you hadn’t done what you did to save me, if we weren’t already, how can I put this? In covenant with each other? That seems right, it feels right when I say it aloud—it’s not only about balance but about sharing. Trust. You and I now, we Summon what we need, at least, you do and I’m learning. It isn’t a corruption or an abomination if we are giving and want to give, the way you were with me when I was dying. I don’t think Ilya Morozova understood mending very well—how much care it takes to do well, how something repaired isn’t flawed but enhanced. He probably thought it was woman’s work and ignored it. He didn’t leave much room for anyone else to offer an alternate explication. There were other Grisha who had to be thinking about the same issues, but to find anything they’ve written is harder than pulling a snowflake from the sea. I think, honestly, Ilya must have been a terrible bully. And probably pretty dull conversationally speaking.”

Aleksander took in the pretty, prim purse of her lips, her head tilted to one side, the hope and trepidation in her tone. Her slight figure in her black kefta, the bit of blue silk that peeped out from one of her cuffs, the curve of her cheek and the squaring of her narrow shoulders. He’d wanted her for so long and now she was here and more than he’d prepared for, overwhelming. Intoxicating.

“Alina, you are annihilating,” he said.

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” she answered, closing the distance between them. He felt the most tremendous surge of tenderness for her and no small flare of sexual attraction, the former the greater surprise. “Like it’s final, that we don’t live in a world of seasons and mushrooms.”

“Mushrooms?”

“They grow over dying things. Life finding a way,” she said.

“Sometimes they kill you,” he said.

“And sometimes they give you visions,” she countered. “They let you see in the darkness. Into the darkness.”

“I think the Duke of Keramzin allowed his orphans to do far too much foraging,” Aleksander said.

“Only in books,” Alina said. “Do you think I’m right?”

“I don’t know,” he said. “I think we’ll have to figure that out together.”

“I was hoping you’d just agree with me,” she admitted and he laughed.

“I may have created a monster,” he said. “You were a humble mapmaker a month ago.”

“I was a mediocre mapmaker. Not humble. And the time for monsters is over,” she said.

“Tell that to Fjerda and Shu-Han,” he replied, unable to keep the bitterness from his voice. She didn’t pat his arm or smile encouragingly, but instead let her face reflect his own urge for destruction. She did have her own scores to settle, debts that could never be completely cleared.

“That’s for after we deal with the Fold and the volcra. The Apparat too, he gives me a bad feeling. And Dame Baghra—”

“Baghra is not going to take kindly to any of this. What you want us to undertake,” Aleksander said, in perhaps the greatest understatement of the past five centuries.

“She doesn’t take kindly to anything or anyone,” Alina replied. “But if we can make her see what’s possible…”

Aleksander thought of his mother and her long stare, her unbound hair like a storm around her, the last time she had presented herself as a Summoner in full command of her small science. Night had seemed as day in contrast to the darkness she conjured forth. She could be a staunch ally, a daunting foe. If Alina asked him a thousand questions about her, he wouldn’t be able to answer even one.

“Why don’t we start with David Kostyk,” Aleksander suggested. “I’ve found him to have a remarkable ability to find unexpected solutions to the most tangled problems. And he’s the least likely to be shocked by your ideas.”

“We should go to his studio,” Alina said. “He might think he was in trouble if you send for him to come to your rooms and Genya is in mine so often, we won’t get a word out of him.”

“You’ve noticed, then, his…preference for Miss Safin?” Aleksander said.

“I wouldn’t have needed to Summon to see what’s right there,” Alina replied. “Anyone in love could recognize his expression, how he’s afraid she’d reject him and how that keeps him quiet.”

“You think he needn’t be?” Aleksander asked. The inquiry should not have felt as great a risk as the ritual he’d done to save her life and anneal their power, and yet, looking at her face and wanting her welcome, he understood it to be the truth. They were beyond desiring possession.

“She would’ve let him know if his feelings weren’t returned in equal measure,” Alina said, her eyes brighter than any Summoned sfera. “It’s less a leap of faith than he imagines to speak—more like a hop.”

“Are you sure?” he said.

“I can’t lie to you, Aleksander,” she said. “I can’t help wondering—”

“You don’t have to,” he said, moving so his lips grazed her forehead, her temple, her cheek. “Keep wondering,” he murmured, as it grew dim around them. For the first time, he was not afraid of the dark.

#darklina #canon au #romance #alina asking the big questions #merzost #what having a true equal could look like #david kostyk #baghra #david/genya #more antidote-fic for Season 2 #the fold #shadow and bone #sab #alina/aleksander #aleksander morozova #alina starkov

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highaver · 9 months

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@nursc asked: ❛ what if i hurt you? ❜

ㅤ“ You won't. ”

ㅤThere are no guarantees, of course. Christine probably will, in fact, hurt him in the course of this wild and stupid plan they've come up with to get themselves out of this shitty situation. But that's the job, isn't it? He'd rather get hurt and see her live than avoid any pain at all and be the reason they both die here.

ㅤBalfour covers her hand with his own, shivering from the cold, and looks her in the eye. It's a slow smile that spreads across his face, and one not entirely convinced of itself. But she's Christine. He trusts her implicitly, with everything he's got, his whole damn heart and his whole damn mind.

ㅤ“ Even if you do, it's nothing I don't have coming, eh? Come on. You know I'm a shit patient. Just inject the damn thing before I change my mind. ”

#nursc #ans.#ask.#ve. trek.#i gesture to this reply as if it's a canonical episode of s2 focusing on bal and christine's friendship #and they are in trouble bc ofc they are.#anyway idk some scrabbled together antidote thing. i'm working off vibes here before anything else lmfao

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xjustakay · 4 months

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Hiiiiiiiii Kay :)

I have a question that has been PLAGUING me since I read this:

“You can’t tell me you don’t have something that you know an abnormal amount of information about,” James says.

“There’s plenty of things I know an abnormal amount of information about, I have no life, but I don’t make that anybody else’s problem,” Regulus teases.

PLEASE can you tell me what those topics are?! I NEED TO KNOW!! (esp because there are PLENTY?!)

Love you and your magnificent brain <3 mwah!

pom i literally love when you ask these questions hahahaha. gonna give you another answer that’s much longer than you actually asked for:

but so, regulus has read a lot. growing up he spent a lot of time at home quiet and wanting to be alone away from it all with a book, and even as he became an adult he just kept reading. not just for pleasure, either, not just fiction stuff, he’s like a little packrat with knowledge, he’s very curious and likes to know things and see different inputs on things and all that (which is also another reason he enjoys james dorkily rattling off fire facts even though he teases him about it). sometimes it’s things that like genuinely pique his interest, and other times it’s just things he wants to be able to be fucking right about lmao. so that’s where that “plenty” comes from. like, there’s a high possibility if you took you got the antidote regulus to a trivia night, he knows way more answers than anybody else on the team expects and everyone’s looking at him like ???? you’re twenty-two years old why do you casually know that ??? lmao

this one doesn’t come as too much of a shock since we’ve seen him and his photography hobby before, but baby boy knows way more than he needs to know about what different cameras do, how to achieve different light leaks, best times and weathers for certain lighting and coloration on photos, different methods of photo development and what looks best for what sort of photos, etc etc. just way more knowledge than the casual “i like taking pictures sometimes” type hobby lol.

also hasn’t been touched on quite yet, but he really likes reptiles. lizards, snakes, turtles, the whole deal. he has this reptarium he likes to visit sometimes (coming up in a later chapter lol) bc he likes to look at all the cool critters he can’t afford/doesn’t have the space for. but bc he wants to have a whole little reptile collective in a dream world someday, he knows copious amounts about them in like “preparation” almost; different snake breeds and morphs and what their care is like, same with a slew of different lizards. headcanon that pandora mentioned precisely one time that she’d love to get a leopard gecko and regulus was buzzing, like ‘oh yeah? what sort of morph are you looking for? do you have other lizards? do you have the space for a tank big enough for one? you know you have to be careful with temperature regulation with them, right?’ so on and so forth and pandora was like 🧍🏻‍♀️ it’s like 8 in the morning my dude i’ve never seen you talk this much

tldr; don’t let reg fool you when he calls james a loser. he’s also a fucking loser in his own way (affectionate. sooo affectionate lol)

#i love sharing the weird little deep cuts i have for my fics lmao #bc they’re so not important in the grand scheme #but i know them and love them #thank youuuu again for asking pom<33 #sorry i rambled lmao #pom tag<3 #fic: you got the antidote #answered

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