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karous9001 · 6 years

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You need patience in order to find true happiness.

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espytalks · 5 years

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heck ya knew years eve boii! time to scramble about cleanin the house so i don’t have to do it on new years due to a superstition that if you spend new years doing a thing, that's all you’ll be doin the whole year!

#espy talks #it's more or less been on point anyways so i'm not gonna stop believein it #basically i just wanna like. actually spend new years in a clean house #cause i feel like my problem is thinking'i'll get to it tomorrow' instead of 'i'm glad i finished it'

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ndx94 · 3 years

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Indecency / Skywriting / Saebyeok gwa yanghon / John MacArthur / Chopin in Babylon / Houellebecqiana Tristessesque ~ 'Before Father Abraham's Sarah-Lily and Jaehee''Something sometihng in Korean from 9 to 5, 5 to 9'- f(x)They hold to their lives.'Go home, be happy' - Milwaukee dreams. - ideal / ideation / daydream of a hagwon dubbed or christened New Eternity; and another titled Everprep. I used to make up fictive hostess-bars;cis(?)-/para-fictive hostesses'I will sing of His mercies; every day, every hourHe gives me power... He never failed me yet.My soul's been anchored; God almighty my' -tenor section, bass sectionde profundulacuclamavi.TEFL, TOEIC, TOEFL,TOEFL JR.'The Mormons and the Marines - where is the general and his whore? - these generals and geniuses -& Xiang Yu cried three lines of tears,slaughtered a bunch of villagersand went down in the New York TimesBusiness Sectionfor motivation.I used to be crazy and confused;now feel consciously, reflectively schzophrenic.I have no right to look back.A Black boy runs out to the middle of the street and crouches like a sprinter in the starting-block;I am put in mind of a poem of Yehuda Amichai about the crouch of the Israeli people.'Forgetfulness is a white bird - I can remember much forgetfulness' - something about stunning the Sybil into prophecyonly I don't believe that all poets are homosexual suicides to say too little and far least;I wanted to forget everything about my biological family / cover 31 years in most obliterating, righteous-annihilatorywhite garments of righteousnessand keep.'Do this in remembrance of Me' -blue and chalk skies.I dreamof a test I can passabiding on the rooftop -I want a helicopter.'Go home, be happy' -The world isn't going to change much -That guy forced his girlfriend's abortionand people tomorrow will be like that still - Satan hasn't yet fallen asleep in this world.'Go home, be happy' - Let's listen to Grace to You this evening / tonight, O wife of my youth, girlfriend ideal, so 'jeongdokhan' for me.My apologia pro sein the remains of my days, remains of DJ(J)(J);I don't believein family as God,money, Science, waror the power of self-belief;in America they oft abandon the weak.Boa Kwon danced atop a skyscraper in [Busan?]; there might have been a helipad with or without a helicopter.Where is God? Where is Jesus today?I don't see or seem to see him very oft in the US of A.728K died from Covid-19 here - more than WW2, Vietnamand Korea put together -less than 3 in the ROK;a terrible judgment is it not?Yanghon-gwa saebyeok.'These Arabs are just along for the ride,' Says the Black man with the gut at the mental hospital.At the filling station the man from the Middle East asks me, 'Is that Kamala?'Sharon left Helo on Caprica, blastsed the guy off of the Raptor lifting off; President Roslin tried an extract for her breastcancer from a Piscean(?) plant alled Kamala.Grand Admiral Prime Minister Esteemed Valorous Duke Navl Commander of the Three Provinces Lee Soon Shin was born in Jung-guand I don't know what to do'Go home, be happy' - something about Fresca - maybe I'll drive again to Good Will historic North Side of Babylon MOther of Prostitutesand wait to listen to Grace to YouAn audiobook epilogue / envoi ~'sijo'White Dove Desiderata et Tristesse (pace Chopin 10-3) - It's more than a feeling - I know I've felt like this before and now I'm feeling it even moreTour the garden the Principal and his secretary lunchtime amid 'Junggu' Songwoo rose and pine about the gold-fenced school grounds, as if Korean women and girls, supposed never to be alone, borne their fruits in sheer light / lamp-being;white doves of forgetfulness that / who serve put us in forgetfulness of all and anyone save God alone, the Three One.Writing poems is too easy - fish in pool, by water tree, winterspring frankincense, mrryh, whatever gold is / means, pearl, diamondalso white gold and rose gold - the Lord is my salvation Three in One; lightning thunder almost / ingh together in Pocheon skies. Green soldier transports. Come quickly. Surely I come. End of Revelation; end of the Holy Bible.Faith and solicitude of Saint Monicamother of Aurelius

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lairofsentinel · 6 years

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Rules: answer these 85 questions and tag 20 people

tagged by @bluegrumps

(I’m not tagging people)

— what was your last…

1. drink: mate (counts? it’s a south American beverage. I'm an alcohol-free peson)

2. phone call: My doctor, to make an appointment

3. text message: One of my friends (he is like a brother to me)

4. song you listened to: Dubstep _ Instrumental Core - The Angels Among Demons

5. time you cried: a year and a half more or less. When my father died.

__ have you ever…

6. dated someone twice: No.

7. kissed someone and regretted it: I regretted the relationship, because she used me, but no. I liked kissing my partner in all my relationships. (Or you mean outside a relationship? Never did that)

8. been cheated on: Oh... god. Twice. My first relationship, and my second and most meaningful one. The feeling of not being enough is horrible when this keeps happening like a habit. I have this certainty that my relationships will end in that way, always.

9. lost someone special: Who didn't?.

10. been depressed: Since teenage. Ups and downs.

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: Never

— fave colours

12. Black

13. Dark red

14. Brown

— in the last year have you…

15. made new friends: I guess I did. I think.

16. fallen out of love: No.

17. laughed until you cried: A couple of months ago. One of my friends is hilarious... he makes me laugh and cry at the same time.

18. found out someone was talking about you: No.

19. met someone who changed you: No. I changed because I had to pass an exam, and I acquired really good habits that I keep them.

20. found out who your friends are: No. I know long time ago.

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list: What? no. How specific this one is

— general

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl: 70%. The rest are online friends. I hope I can meet them personally. Eventually.

23. do you have any pets: My dog. She is called Maia.

24. do you want to change your name: Please, yes. I wish so much to change it... but Law is so binary, that never considered that option for us.

25. what did you do for your last birthday: Nothing. I try to make everyone forget my birthday.

26. what time did you wake up today: 3.45 am. Ughhh.

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: Trying to sleep.

28. what is something you can’t wait for: Shadowhunters new episodes. And More Magnus Bane.

30. what are you listening to right now: The sound of the Void. Aka, silence.

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Never.

32. something that’s getting on your nerves: People full stopping in middle of the street just to watch their phones, while I'm walking super fast behind them, and bump them, and then they are upset. Like, Fucker!. You are the one in middle of the street watching if your useless social life means something to someone while you are burning my almost non existent free time that I have to waste in commuting! And YOU are the upset one!? FUCKER! (yeah, I get really an ass for that... because I'm all the fucking time bumping people doing this, and I spend more than 5 hours per day commuting and walking fast, trying not to waste MORE time than necessary. So, yeah, I become pretty a Golden asshole ever. But these assholes never use their brains to walk aside, stand in a corner, close to the wall, and THEN watch their phones.... Noooo, that's too much to ask)

33. most visited website: tumblr, facebook, email accounts.

34. hair colour: Dark brown. I want half of my kind-of-mohawk in red or blue... but never got the time to do ALL that work.... nou.

35. long or short hair: kind-of-Mohawk. More like Banehawk :D

36. do you have a crush on someone: No. I think. I never know if I have crushes anyway.

37. what do you like about yourself: My self-discipline. Hell, that's the only thing that kicks me all the time when I'm getting down and down with my depression. I love it. It’s like a military voice in my head, repeating: “Are you fuckign depressed? No, not on my sight, get up, go ahead, fucking hell, DO your things, there is not time for softie bullshit, you are not going to stay alive if you don’t move your ass, asshole”.

38. want any piercings: Maybe?. I don't know if I want one in my lip. Really I don't know. They look awesome in others... in me, I don't know.

39. blood type: 0

40. nicknames: Maco, Mako.

41. relationship status: Single and nostalgic for things that I know I will never have again (I know, it sounds dramatic, but it's true)

42. sign: Taurus

43. pronouns: They, them. Or mixing the binaries.

44. fave tv show: Currently, Shadowhunters.

45. tattoos: None. I want one that follows the arms muscles, but I never found a nice design. Something like Zevran has in his face, but over the arms, playing with the form of muscles.

46. right or left handed: right

47: ever had surgery: No. Soon I will have my surgery for my wisdom tooth :(. Fucking tooth.

48. piercings: Both ears. Fucking society.

49. sport: Martial Arts.

50. vacation: it means days without commuting.

51. trainers: ??? Jeff Cavaliere?. I mean, I watch his videos on youtube, not that he is my trainer..... what the fuck?. Or you mean the shoes?. I like trainers/snickers. I also like these kind of military boots.

— more general

52. eating: A lot. And everything too healthy. Among the non-healthy ones, ice-cream.

53. drinking: Water

54. i’m about to watch: Shadowhunters, tomorrow. Lot of Warlock Lore! :D

55. waiting for: Shadowhunters. In long term, to find a place where to belong (probably it will never happen). In long-long term: to realise I'm immortal, so I can destroy the capitalism with just my immortality and my evil plan. (hey, dreaming is free)

56. want: to stop my disphoria. This year has been, and keeps being a monster set free in my mind.

57. get married: No. Never. What for? For being cheated on?. No, thank you. haha.

58. career: Physicist. I also would like to be a writer.

— which is better

59. hugs or kisses: uh.... Both.

60. lips or eyes: Eyes

61. shorter or taller: eh?.

62. older or younger: EH? I like to wear old clothings.

63. nice arms or stomach: …. this is getting gore.

64. hookup or relationships: Relationships.

65. troublemaker or hesitant: Eh?. I'm not getting this part.... what?. Can anyone explain how I should understand this?. Is this about sex? Because... I don't have a clue what a troublemaker sex would be...... and thinking on it makes me develop the weirdest ideas ever....

— have you ever

66. kissed a stranger: No.

67. drank hard liquor: No.

68.turned someone down: Yes.

69. sex on first date: No.

70: broken someone’s heart: How would I know?. But probably no. I mean, my ex told me I broke her heart, but, hey.... you cheated on me, so, I think that doesn't count.

71. had your heart broken: Deeply. Beyond healing.

72. been arrested: No. But police always looks at me as if they want me to arrest.

73. cried when someone died: Of course.

74. fallen for a friend: Yes.

— do you believe in

75. yourself: Yes.

76. miracles: No.

77. love at first sight: No.

78. santa claus: Pft. No!.

79. angels: hahahha. No. Well, I believein Shadowhunter’s angels (hahaha, I’m totally rotten in this fandom by now....)

— misc

80. eye colour: Brown.

81. best friends name: Not writing them. But I can write 3 names.

82. favourite movie: No, it's not Shadowhunters’. That was a disgrace. I have many favourite movies... but if I reduce the list to my fave film in the last year.... I would say Die Welle: The Wave. German film related to fascist behaviour and ideology. Loved it.

83. favourite actor: I'm going to be super obvious here, and considering I have no idea about actors and actress in general, I will keep myself in my current well-known area: Harry Shum Jr.

84. favourite cartoon: Natsume, Or Hosou, Or so many films of Hayao Miyazaki, or Mushishi.... no, man. I can't choose. Anime has so many wonderful gems.

85. favourite teacher’s name: Carmen

Tagging: Any person who follows me, and read this whole thing is invited to do it, and tagging me back so I can read too. :D

#askmeme #memes #thank you bluegrumps! :D it was fun to do it

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karous9001 · 6 years

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