#but I still have to sit with the rest of it and process it and keep myself calm about it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

livelaughlovesubs · 2 days

Note

do you write for nanami? if you do, i have a req :3

au where hes still with us (sniffles) and being a sorcerer is more of an on-the-side thing, and he's like an overworked office middle class guy whos also a wizard on the lowkey. sometimes he works so much he even forgets his birthday. but you didn't. ohhh no you did not. you're at home patiently waiting for him, and all you want is to spoil him for the night because he deserves it!! he deserves to just be taken care of, given the care he needs, maybe a little overstim in the process, but it's all with good intentions... (right?)

SORRY THIS IS SO LONG OMG 😭😭

anyway...... requesting a sub!nanami x softdom!female!reader with a little overstim <3 (out here exposing my service dom fantasies)

idk if you do emoji anons, but if you do can i be 🎱 anon? tysm!! i love your works and i hope your have a lovely day/night :) <333

So taking care of nanami on his birthday? Consider it done. Also welcome 🎱 anon, I’m happy about all my new anons ^^

Dom!reader x sub!nanami

Warning: blow job (reader giving), teasing, marking - hickeys, fluff, use of pet names

Hands moving across the table, reaching for the dirty porcelain. The sound of plates being stacked could be heard, and you swiftly placed the dishes on the counter. Nanami tried to help, carrying the cake over to the refrigerator, though you stopped him. “Let me do it, it’s your birthday today! You are forbidden from working.” You declared, snatching whatever he was holding away and putting it in its rightful place yourself. “My birthday isn’t that important, just let me help.” He was such a gentleman, but you still stayed stubborn. Today was his birthday, yet he still went to work, he even did overtime. That’s not acceptable, at least now you should lift some burden off his shoulder.

Right, that was your plan. To take care of him, make him feel loved and happy. Also most importantly, not let him do any chores. Even if it doesn’t look like that, he also has to rest. You really adored him which is why you wished he’d take care of himself some more, and have a mesmerising birthday of course. So why did he look so troubled? You told him not to help. Instead of relaxing he looks uncomfortable or awkward. Just sitting there, watching you do it all. Seems like this part failed a little.. then it’s time to move onto the next one.

Still determined to make him enjoy himself, you brought him to your shared bedroom after watching a movie. “Could you please sit down, my dear?” You asked him, while slowly stripping your clothes. Until you were only in your undergarments. In the meantime the Blondie sat down, a slightly hesitant look on his face. He wasn’t sure what to do, since you’ve been taking everything upon yourself the entire time. His hands wandered to his belt, gaze never leaving your body. Before he could get rid of his belt, he felt your hands on top of his, stopping him gently. “Leave it all to me, alright?”

Nanami felt really embarrassed now. What was he, a kid? Why would he need help undressing himself? Despite his inner turmoil, he still let you do whatever you wanted. It looked like you planned all of this just for him, thus he’ll try to play along. The last thing he’d want is to inconvenient you. Slowly you pulled his belt out, then your fingers wandered up to his collar. He felt a slight tug as you pulled on his tie, untying the knot. Then you gently, and carefully unbuttoned his deep blue shirt. You were only focused on him, and nothing else, pupils glancing at his face every now and then. A smile spread across your features when you saw him furrowing his brows. “You can take off those glasses now.” You whispered, one hand reaching for his cheeks, caressing him while the other still held his dress shirt. His own hand moved upwards and took them off, placing them on the nightstand.

“Such beautiful eyes, don’t hide them from me all the time, hehe.” “I’m not hiding anything from you.” You sure hoped that was the case, considering how he thinks most of the stuff happening at work isn’t worth mentioning. Now that that was out of the picture, you resumed your previous antics, opening one button after another. Soon it revealed his muscular body, and you couldn’t help but stare. You have always loved everything about him, from the head to toes. Yet right now you were sure his torso was your favourite. How beautiful his skin was, as well as the little, barely visible scars from battles; or his firm chest with those cute nipples.

You moved your face closer to his, hands on his pecs now as you kissed him, locking your lips with his. His lips were soft and you were like in a trance when you kissed him. Before he got to enjoy it you pulled back, grinning from ear to ear. It was way too short for him, but he didn’t complain, he could never get mad at you. Afterwards you started kissing his neck. So carefully and tender, that it felt like a feather brushing over his skin, it was almost ticklish. His breath sharpened by a notch when you started groping his chest, squeezing that place with your fingers. In between kisses and smooches, you made sure to whisper into his ear, showering him with compliments. “I’m so glad to have you, my handsome and beautiful boy.” This continued for a bit, and soon his entire collarbone area was covered by red spots. Some hickeys were on his torso too. “You look gorgeous right now.” you commented on those trails of marks you left behind, before fumbling with the zipper of his pants.

You didn’t strip him entirely naked, only enough that you get to touch him wherever. Pulling his pants and underwear down a little to free his cock. He groaned a little when you wrapped your hand around his shaft, rubbing the part that is connected to his pelvis. “Y/n, darling.. don’t tease today.” Immediately your attention wandered to him again, shushing him with your finger as you said, “don’t worry, I’ll take care of everything, I’ll make you feel good today.” A light chuckle, then you played with his tip. The adoration you had for him was genuine, and visible in your eyes.

The way you looked so confident and eager to make him feel good was so adorable in his eyes, and he just can’t help himself but fall even more. Sighting a little before it turned into a breathy moan, “uhh,..huh.” Your delicate fingers were touching all the right places, and soon he was fully erect. One of his hands was clutching the sheets, while the other reached out to your hair, stroking it gently. This surprised you a little, but it wasn’t too bad so you let him be. Then you moved lower, until your lips were inches away from his dick. You let your saliva drool down, afterwards you licked his tip as a tease. “Hmm- i told you not to tease.” “Oh? Guess i forgot that then~” an adorable giggle followed, coming from you. He was truly lucky to have you here with him.

While he was still admiring the relationship you two have build, you took him into your mouth and sucked. Trying your best to avoid any teeth and using your tongue to roll it over his tip. “Ughh- haa..” his grip on your hair tightened. Normally you’d push his hand away, though today was a special occasion. Sweet moans and the occasional gasp spilled from his lips, eyes now clenched shut. Sometimes he’d bite his bottom lip too, to try and keep his voice down. You just continued taking more of him, using your hand to jerk off the rest that didn’t fit. “Darling.” He called out to you, but stopped mid sentence to compose himself. It was getting harder and harder to speak, or to think.

He could feel every fever of his being pulsing, his heart pounding like crazy. The blood rushed to his face and abdomen, making the rest of his limps go numb. Strength was leaving his legs and arms slowly, all while more and more pleasure flourished within him. How his body convulsed every time you licked his tip, or when the inside of your mouth clenched down on him. It felt warm and soft, so good he could feel himself getting closer to the edge.

“Ahh.. keep going, just like that.. please.” Finally he finished his sentence, pleading with you with a meek voice. You didn’t plan on stopping anyway, instead you wanted to make him beg you to stop at the end of this session. Smirking to yourself as you kept doing your own thing, enjoying the noises he’d make. Did it really feel that good? Was what you would have liked to ask, but this is fine too. As long as your lovely boyfriend looks ecstatic and full of bliss, you were content too. Out of nowhere his grip righted by a lot, enough to make it hurt for you. He mumbled apologies while saying, “ah.. I’m clo-close.. haa, sorry., darling…”

What a lucky boy. If today was any other day you would have punished him. Fine, guess you were going to be especially merciful with him. You didn’t mind the slight sting his tug brought you, mouth and hands still working on bringing him over the edge. He let go of your hair in the last minute and clasped it over his mouth. A silent moan left him, then a repressed groan followed. “Nghhnmmm…!! Ahhh..ugh..” his voice was beautiful, you could listen to him all day. Even though his hand wasn’t in your hair anymore, you still didn’t move away. Letting him cum in your mouth, before you finally moved back. When your lips left his dick you made a wet slurping sound, then swallowed everything he offered to you. “Delicious~” you smiled innocently as if you didn’t just make him see heaven.

Suddenly he moved closer to you, sitting up and hands grabbing your cheeks now. “Nanami? Is something?” You wondered, but that curiosity soon got replaced by shock and a joyful feeling you haven’t felt for a while. He kissed your forehead, cupping your face with his hands as he whispered, “I’m glad i can spend my birthday with you.” All while smiling so tenderly, with a calmness and warmth that was unfamiliar to you. Only sometimes he’d get emotional enough to be like this, and whenever he did, you couldn’t help but fall in love with him all over again. “Happy birthday, nanami.”

#sub character #sub!character #dom reader #dom!reader #sub jjk #sub jujutsu kaisen #sub nanami #nanami kento #nanami x reader #jjk nanami #nanami smut #jujutsu nanami #nanami x you #jujutsu kaisen nanami #nanami fluff #nanami x y/n #🎱 anon

110 notes · View notes

sturnsdoll · 3 hours

Text

𝖶𝖨𝖲𝖣𝖮𝖬 𝖳𝖤𝖤𝖳𝖧 -`♡´- -C.S

(HEADCANNONS!)

pairing: chris x (gf) reader, some reader x bsf matt and nick <3

summary: how chris would support his girlfriend before, after, and through wisdom teeth removal, as well as being under the influence of anesthetics!

warnings: fluffy!headcannons, dentist, mention of teeth pulling, little blood, slight mention of needles, anesethetics, established relationships.

authors note: kind of a blurb more than hc's tbh? it was a little rushed! sorry!

₊⊹⤑ you had been talking about how nervous you were for a couple weeks now..

₊⊹⤑ so it was no surprise when the whole car ride there, you were holding your boyfriends hand and avoiding the topic of what you knew was coming.

₊⊹⤑ chris had been reminding you everyday that besides the needle, the rest of it you wouldn't even remember. he ensured that him matt and nick would be there the entire time if you needed a hand or two.. or three to hold.

₊⊹⤑ with some encouragement (and chris lending you his grey zip up to wear for emotional and physical comfort) you did manage to enter the building just to get it done and over with.

₊⊹⤑ while the IV was intruding your skin, chris stayed next to you, asking about what flavour of ice cream you'd be getting after as a distraction from the needle.

₊⊹⤑ from there on, the process itself you had no memory of but chris stuck close by the entire time incase you needed anything or for some reason woke up.

₊⊹⤑ "hey sweetheart how'r ya feeling?" chris would ask while gently holding your hand when you come to your senses

₊⊹⤑ confused, your instinct was to sit up but chris would immedietly usher you to lay back down, letting you know that they're done working on your teeth.

₊⊹⤑ "why dtha fack is this bullshit still in my fucking arm then HUH?" your words wonky from the cotton in your mouth and the haze of anesthetic.

₊⊹⤑ "shh, were in public stop cursing like a sailor" "dude, nobody under like 100 says 'cursing like a sailor'" "yeah, what he thsaid!"

₊⊹⤑ chris would of course glare at you for agreeing with matt. but his thumb soothingly rubbing your hand tells you that he's obviously not too mad.

₊⊹⤑ you would leave later then you should have because everytime a password was given to you, you'd forget less than five seconds later..

₊⊹⤑ "it was ass right?" "no, it was GRASS sweetheart...."

₊⊹⤑ everything that came out of your mouth had the doctors and the triplets giggling.

₊⊹⤑ when it came time to take the IV out, chris thought that a 'got your nose' joke would be funny to distract you with. it was... definetly distracting at least???

₊⊹⤑ usually you were sweet to your boyfriend but something about anesthetic had you more than arguementative today.

₊⊹⤑ chris would try complimenting you "you look pretty even like this"

₊⊹⤑ "i KNOW i do. stop being corny you sthtoopid fuck" chris's jaw drops like he's offended but you don't care because nick's contagious laugh brings out your own laughter out as well.

₊⊹⤑ "i thought i was supposed to be the stupid one right now, not you"

₊⊹⤑ "maybe YOUU need to see the dentist about all those terrible jokes that come out of your mouth."

₊⊹⤑ you had no filter, just having fun rebelling against your usual niceness to your loved one.

₊⊹⤑ then finally the car ride came.

₊⊹⤑ now you leant on chris' shoulder to take a nap

₊⊹⤑ "thought i was stupid?" he questions, arm coming around to pull you in closer. "shhhh i'm sthleeping" the inpedament on your speech makes him giggle. "I SAID SHHHHHH" "jesus. my bad sleepyhead"

₊⊹⤑ the whole car ride he was making sure you didn't need your gauze changed, asking if you need water, offering you chapstick. you had to tell him to shut up at least 100 times before he'd relax, telling him you could put your own damn chapstick on. (you ended up asking him for help two minutes later...)

₊⊹⤑ the whole rest of the car ride was filled with you zipping up and down the zipper of your boyfriends sweater you had on, mixed with your favourite artist playing as you attempted to sing along

₊⊹⤑ the second you entered the triplets home, you rested on the couch with your legs over your boyfriends lap, singing a song that everyones pretty sure doesn't exist..

₊⊹⤑ "i love... YOUUUUUUU, i lovovovovovee YOUU, all three of YOUUuUuU-" "someone sedate her again." nick jokes while handing you an ice pack you'd previously asked for.

₊⊹⤑ "want me to hold it on your jaw for you bab- oh" before he can finish speaking you're gripping his wrist, leaning toward him "wanna know something?" you ask eagerly "hm?" "I LOVE YOU!" "i love you more"

₊⊹⤑ matt and nick didn't enjoy the next 30 minutes of the predictable arguement at all. ₊⊹⤑ once the delusion of the anesthetic wore off, you were just plain tired. nick and matt had both chosen to chill in their own rooms by now.

₊⊹⤑ the second you mentioned wanting to lay down, chris curled up behind you with a blanket over the two of you. he held you tight, muttering in your ear about how good you did today and how proud he is that you went.

₊⊹⤑ "sorry for calling you stupid" you apologize with a sweetly apologetic smile.

₊⊹⤑ "aw, it's okay. i know you didn't mean it-" "wellll sometimes.." "nevermind i don't forgive you."

₊⊹⤑ he'd make sure your favourite cartoon was on and that he held your ice pack on your sore jaw till you eventually drifted into sleep.

tags ᥫ᭡: @pettydollie @mattsrod @sturncakez @sturniololovesss @sturniolosstar @sstvrnioloo @watercolorskyy @sturniol0s @6ix9inewiturmom @sonicsmacks @orangela

#chris sturniolo #sturnsdoll #chris sturniolo fanfic #chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo triplets fanfic #matt sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo fanfic #nick sturniolo

77 notes · View notes

destructive-poet · 3 days

Note

Your post about Tav helping Astarion with his hair and post bath cuddles sounds so adorable 🥺�� Could I request a full fic for that idea? ❤️

oh of course! I was actually already wanting to write it a bit ❤️ I hope you like it :)

Spa Treatment

astarion x gn! human tav fluff drabble (~400 words, short and sweet.)

“Hold still,” they say, wooden comb gripped in hand, gently detangling the Vampire’s silver locks.

rating: mature

tw: none? (I mean I guess just the smallest bit suggestive for a second.)

minors dni!

The bath had been an undoubtedly fantastic idea.

For the first time in what felt like ages they had been able to have a large, private, warm bath at their whims. And certainly, the two were going to take the fullest advantage of it.

“Fuck,” he said, lowering himself into the water with a groan. “Gods, I haven’t done this in… Well, as long as I can remember.” The human at his side simply slides in, sitting down completely in the stone pool, up to their chest in water. “It’s nice.” They say, simply, though the blissful look on their face suggests it is far better than nice.

“Come here,” they say, reaching towards Astarion to tuck his hair behind his ears. “Look at all of this,” they muse, gesturing to a wide variety of soaps, lotions, and cosmetic concoctions. “It’s beautiful. I could live in here.”

The vampire adds, “As nice as that sounds, I think you would prune up. And I can’t drink from a piece of shriveled fruit, my dear.”

“Oh, so that’s what I am to you? Only a free meal?” They say, turning away and crossing their arms, pretending to be upset. Quickly, a solid figure pulls their own against it’s chest, drawing them back into it. He begins kissing down the back of their neck and across their shoulders, hands settling into their hips. “Not at all, you sustain me in more than one way, dear.” He teases, and the human whips around to kiss him, tasting clean and warm, their arms wrapping around him. It lasts a good while, before they break away, hand trailing across his arm, moving away to look at the jars and bottles lining the side of the bath.

Hours later, they sit on the ground, perfumed in a variety of exotic scents, scrubbed and lotioned and damp. A fur rug separates the two lovers from the cold, tiled floor. The fireplace in front of them warms them, wet hair now almost dried. “Hold still,” the human says, wooden comb gripped in hand, gently detangling the Vampire’s silver locks.

Their eyes seem to drift closed throughout the process, and when it’s done, they set the comb to the side, laying down onto the rug. Astarion is quick to follow, resting his head on their chest and curving his body to cradle his companion’s. “Dearest,” he whispers, and they pull the thick towel over his body, wriggling closer, as if they could live in his skin. “Goodnight, Astarion,” they yawn, half lidded eyes adoringly gazing up at him, before succumbing to the darkness.

He kisses their lavender and jasmine tasting hair, soaking in the warmth of his love, the fire, the fabric. “Goodnight, darling.”

#ao3 #astarion x tav #astarion x you #astarion x reader #astarion imagine #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #bg3 astarion #fluff #domestic fluff #ask #request

102 notes · View notes

hunnysnoops · 23 hours

Text

White Teeth Teens

Chapter Four: History Eraser

Kyle Broflovski x fem reader

They made their paints by mixing acid wash and lemonade. In my brain I rearrange the letters on the page to spell your name.

Premise: A birthday party takes an awry turn

Warnings: crude language and humour / blood / injury / marijuana usage

MASTERLIST

Adam's blood was still soaked into the turf by the time track and field practice was in the process of giving you heat stroke. Each gust of humid wind burned at your throat a little more than the last like someone had set fire to your lungs.

While everyone else was jogging around the track in a leisurely manner, you and Kyle were sprinting like you were headed for the sun.

"What was that?" You call behind you, turning your head just the slightest "I can't hear you, you're falling behind."

"I didn't say anything," Kyle runs up beside you, matching your pace. Ginger curls were sticking to the sweat on his forehead and neck, glistening under the fading light of the day.

"That sounds like something that someone who said something would say," you respond, glancing down at your sneakers pounding against the track before quickening your pace.

"What?" His eyebrows furrow in confusion.

With each step, you fell into a steady rhythm, feet pounding against the track with determination to be just a little better than the boy trailing you. You felt the familiar burn in your muscles, the exhilarating rush of adrenaline as you pushed yourself harder, faster.

The wind whipped through your hair, cooling the sweat on your brow as you pushed past your limits, your lungs burning with every sharp breath. You ignored the overexertion gripping at you, the nausea creeping up like little hands of wind pushing at the back of your throat.

Your thoughts focused solely on the rhythmic beating of your feet against the turf and Kyle. It took what must've been a God's power not to glance around every few seconds to see how close he was to you, how steadily he fell into tempo with your pace.

That day was shaping up to be a particularly nasty one and you were quite literally trying to run away from it. Though no matter how far your legs took you, you were still on the track, Kyle only feet behind you.

It only added to that lingering thought that rested in the back of your head that you weren't anything special, you were just as good as everyone else and you needed some way to prove them wrong.

"Aw, look they're running together," Red says from her spot on the bleachers where she sits with Leslie. You can hear the sarcasm dripping from her voice.

"Ew, what the hell," you pause looking at Red, you see Kyle ahead and awkwardly jog backwards to create more distance, you only stop completely when you're in front of Red. "We were not."

"So you were racing?"

"No," You scoff "But if we were I would totally win."

"Um, okay, I believe you" She gives Leslie a quick side glance "Are you coming over later?"

"I have a thing," You answer, hands on your hips while you press your lips into a thin line.

"A thing?" Red quirks an eyebrow "Bebe won't be there if that's what you're worried about."

"No, like I actually have a thing," You Answer "Sheila's having a birthday party and I'm obligated to go by my parents."

"Oh," Red nods like everything coming together "A swingers party." She had run a few laps before something more interesting caught her attention then she eventually settled perched on the bleachers with Leslie beside her and a redbull in hand.

"Your parents are swingers?" Leslie asks, dark bangs pinned away from her face.

"No, they're not," You deadpan, any amusement dropping from your face "My parents aren't swingers, they have never swung and they never will."

Red sucks a sharp breath through her teeth before a smile cracks onto her face "Touched a nerve there.”

"No shot," You cross your arms, chest rising and falling as you catch up on lost breath, a group of long-distance runners brushing past behind you.

"I just can't believe you're ditching me for Kyle," Red draws out a deep sigh, teasing you.

A subtle heat rose to your face though you chose to ignore it entirely "Dude, no, I'm ditching you for Kyle's mom." At this, Leslie turns to whisper something to Red before you quickly interject, throwing out one hand in her direction "What could you possibly have to say? I don't even know you."

Leslie swivels her head back to look at you, unsure what to say. Red silently mouths 'Oh my god' one hand slapping over the black headband on her forehead pushing her bangs back. "Sorry?" Leslie breaks the silence.

"Yeah, you should be," You say before bringing your attention back to Red and cutting Leslie out from the equation completely "We still on for Sunday?"

"I'm going to strangle you," Red says, disregarding the question, still stuck on your utter bluntness.

You stick your chin up, exposing your neck "Go ahead." You even brush the stray hairs aside to display your throat like you're ready for her to sink her teeth in. An uneasy quiet settled over the conversation once more as you waited for Red to stay true to her words and strangle you. Of course she doesn't, she just stares at you something like disbelief playing in her eyes. You look at Leslie "We cool?"

"We are." She answers, lips pursed.

"Okay," You say, backing away and carrying on with the run you had initially been focused on, leaving Red and Leslie to watch you lose your breath all over again.

While the younger kids were free to bum around in the basement and play video games, you and Kyle were on the edge of seventeen, not yet adults but you were close enough to intermingle with them and nod with a polite smile while they drone on and on about insignificant things that are massive in their eyes.

After your mother had shown you off to the partygoers in the gauzy white sundress that you reserved only for occasions like this, you had found yourself settled at the dining table amongst the food, scribbling down notes from your binder onto your biology project.

Kyle seemed to have the same idea, he pushed one of the three charcuterie boards aside to make space for his half of the project. He sat silently across from you, the farthest he could get without being dragged into another mindless conversation with someone who held him while he was a baby.

Between the two of you is an abundance of food, everyone seemed to have brought a dish for Sheila's birthday, you couldn't imagine that it would all be finished in one night. You had, of course, a little bit of everything piled on a side plate.

As you worked away, being sure your drawn diagram was perfected and every word had been spaced apart perfectly, you tried your best not to glance at Kyle who seemed absolutely undisturbed while he chewed absent-mindedly on his brownie.

"Oh, look at you two," your dad walked into the dining room with a smile on his face "I can't believe you're getting along."

"Me neither," Kyle answers without looking up from his work. While your mother had stuffed you into your Sunday best, Kyle was looking ready for church that he didn't attend, a white button-up tucked into black dress pants.

"Whatcha working on?" Your dad scooped some pasta salad onto his plate and proceeded to peek over your shoulder, peering down at your paper before nodding like he understood. "Nice, good job, kiddo," He gave you a firm pat on the shoulder before pointing a finger gun at Kyle "And Kyle, looking sharp."

"Thank you, sir," Kyle offers him a tight-lipped smile. In recent years he had almost mastered charming other kid's parents, especially yours who gushed on and on about how good of an influence he was.

"Oh, no need for that, buddy," Your dad waves him off before leaving the room.

"Sir?" You look at Kyle, an unimpressed look clear across your face "Kiss ass."

"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response," He says, shifting his focus to the project in front of him.

"You just did, pretentious douchebag," You mutter under your breath, looking down at your own work. "Dignify," You mock, reaching back for the brownies. Something about them had tasted familiar, somewhat nostalgic like those organic sweets your mother would bring back from the grocery store, which you had written off as being gluten-free or something along those lines.

After roughly forty minutes you had finished not only your half of the biology assignment but all of your homework for your other classes as well. You had looked past the doorway, heard the voices of middle-aged parents, and the grating sound of obnoxious laughter and decided to bum around on your phone.

Empty-headed, you stared drowsily at your timeline, constantly refreshing it in the hopes that something more interesting would pique your interest. It was only seven, the sun was still in the midst of setting yet you felt the strong urge to sleep, maybe it had been over-exertion from track or boredom telling you to close your eyes so you could wake up to something better.

You were too in your own head to notice Kyle who had long finished his assignment and now had his arms crossed in front of him flat on the table, chin resting on top of them, head slightly tilted while he stared at you through the plethora of food.

His mouth abruptly stretched with a yawn, this brought your attention over to him. "What the fuck are you looking at?"

"Nothing," Kyle pushed himself off the table until he was back sitting straight in his chair. He put one hand on his back while he stretched, his neatly tucked-in button-up coming loose from the hem of his pants in the process.

The familiar photo of Remy the rat was now displayed on your dim phone, the meme of him choking that had been floating around the internet since 2007 "Do you think Ratatouille has themes of racism and prejudice?"

"No," Kyle answers, ripping the leg of a rotisserie chicken away from the carcass and tearing the flesh away with his perfect teeth.

"No one thinks a rat can cook, sound familiar?"

"No."

"Anyone can cook," You state the quote like it emphasizes the odd point you're trying to make.

"Ratatouille is not about racism."

"How about when Remy's dad says 'This is what happens when a rat gets too comfortable around humans' and then he's like 'We look out for our own kind, Remy,'" You made sure to throw an awful Italian accent over Djangos parts.

"A movie about a rat making spaghetti is not racist."

"I didn't say it was racist, I said it has themes of racism and prejudice."

"It doesn't."

"Immigration and assimilation perhaps?"

"Stop."

"Why?"

"Because I can't think right now, I'm so tired," his hands find their way into his curls while his elbows rest on the table.

You narrow your eyes at him "Are you on drugs or something?"

"No, it's fucking late, I'm tired," He repeats.

"It's seven," You answer, face straight though your eyelids were growing heavy like they were being pulled down. You rub the back of your hand over your eyes like it's going to wipe away the feeling of daze and set you straight.

Weary you lean back in your chair, slamming your phone face down on the table. You put one hand to rest on your brow like a salute to block out the overwhelming light overhead. It was this moment where you craved nothing more than your bed, to lay your head down on satin pillowcases and let sleep consume you completely.

"This is fucking stupid," You look down awkwardly at the neckline of your dress, your chin pressing against your chest as you do so, you then use one hand to gesture to Kyle in his once wrinkle-free button "We look like we're in a cult, the kind that drinks Koolaid,"

"It was Flavour-Aid actually," He corrects.

"What the fuck is Flavour-Aid?"

"Koolaid, basically."

"Okay," You say, sinking deeper into the uncomfortable spruce chair.

"Who am I really, beyond my thoughts, memories, and experiences?" Kyles's eyes are squinted as he stares past you into absolutely nothing, his thoughts entirely somewhere else.

"Kyle Broflovksi."

"Yeah, what?"

"No, that's who you are, fucking idiot."

"Ah," He nods and the two of you fall back into stillness. Neither of you acknowledged each other for a few minutes, you had forgotten Kyle was there at all and his mind was beginning to fill with existential dread.

"Hey, dudes," In walks your uncle Richie, a cheesy smile across his face, from this alone, you can tell he's been spreading his corny humour. "Didn't know you two were still in here," He was your mother's youngest sibling, being in his mid-thirties; also known as your grandparent's accidental pregnancy.

"Nice," You answer like it's cohesive in any way.

Richie doesn't seem to gather any issue from your response, he just grabs a paper plate and begins to fill it up with all of the goods though he pauses when his eyes fall on the brownies, smile faltering. "Who put these here?"

"My mom," Kyle says.

"His mom," you point at him, repeating his statement.

"Shit, these are for the after party if you know, you know," Richie puts his plate of food down in exchange for the brownie platter "Did you guys catch who ate these?" He must've been the most under-dressed of everyone at the party with his grey sweatpants and Metallica tee poking out from beneath his red zip-up.

You and Kyle stare dead straight at each other, the realization washing over you. It wasn't sleep threatening to take you under but marijuana causing your vision to move in frames and lull you to rest and loosen your tongue.

Richie doesn't fail to catch this exchange "C'mon guys," He sticks a hand out in exasperation and you can't miss the disappointment on his face.

"Uh, we didn't know they were laced," You narrow your eyes at him, never did you think you'd side with Kyle.

"I know, I know, this is just fucked up," He runs a hand through his hair, forcing it through any tangles.

"Fucked up?" Kyle's eyes are half-lidded though he still seems furious. "We're high on my mom's birthday and there's like thirty fuck ass adults in the other room, we're getting busted."

"Nah, it's cool," Richie says and you're unsure if he's assuring you and Kyle or himself. "You're a hophead anyway so you should be a pro at pretending to be sober." He gestures at you and then turns his attention to Kyle "We've been to a handful of barbeques together and I don't think either of us wants to get in trouble right now."

"This is fucking sick," Kyle mutters, burying his head into his hands.

"I know," You nod with the glint of a smile playing on your face. As nervous as you were over the fact you would have to act sober until the party wrapped up, you couldn't ignore the comedic aspect of the situation.

"No," Kyle shoots you a glare "Not sick as in cool, sick in a bad way like I'm sick."

"You guys are teenagers, you do these things it's like a rite of passage and your parents did it all the time when they were your age," Once again, Richie tries to shrug off the circumstances.

"Get accidentally drugged by their uncle?"

"No, uh-not that, I meant getting high in general."

"How much is in them anyways?" You ask.

He shrugs "Like roughly twenty-five mg or so."

"In a single brownie?" Kyle presses for clarification with wide eyes to which Richie nods.

"Twenty-five milligrams?" You tried not to yell, this had shaken you to what felt like sobriety for only a few seconds "I didn't know you were fucking Walter White."

"Hey, man, I left them wrapped up in the fridge with a sticky note that said 'do not eat', I didn't think his mom was gonna put them out."

"Why wouldn't you leave them in your car, dude?" You're looking at him with a tilted gaze, head resting in the palm of one of your hands.

"Temperature sensitive," he says pointing out the fudgy brownies melting into brown sludge like it had been nuked in the microwave.

"What the fuck?" Your mouth falls ajar "Have you ever made a brownie before?

"They usually don't melt," Kyle adds.

"Watch it," Richie had taken this sting straight to heart "They're supposed to be fudgy and you two are the ones who ate them."

"Oh my god, we ate them," Kyle says under his breath, eyes focused on the oak table in front of him, studying each groove. His attention breaks, and he glances around at the food laid before him then reaches to scoop some macaroni onto his grubby paper plate.

"Slow down greedy gut, did you forget you're diabetic?" You slap his hand away from the cheesy macaroni.

"Yeah," He puts the spoon down "I did."

Richie takes a deep breath out "Man, you guys are roasted."

"Time for the family photo!" Sheila yells from the living room, her distinct accent rising over the seemingly endless murmurs.

"Okay, guys, just remember to be cool and act sober, okay?" He tries for a smile, sticking his thumb up and glancing back and forth between the two of you for confirmation "Sober, so good?"

"Relax," You push yourself up from the table, brushing any crumbs away from the skirt of your dress "We're fine."

"Alright," Richie turns on his heels, exiting the dining room with the tray of brownies still in hand.

The moment you and Kyle walked through the doorway, you felt like everyone was staring at you despite not one person turning their head in your direction. Kyle's family had already been sorting themselves out for the photo, he quietly slipped in there, giving his mom a quick hug before smiling at the phone which was being held by Sandra, a woman with far too much wine in her system who took the temporary role of photographer far too seriously.

You settled against a wall next to Weston who had also been suffocating in overly formal clothing. One thought ran through your mind as the Broflovski's smiled for their picture, don't act high.

"What are you doing?" Weston asked, looking up at you with a sneer.

"Huh?"

"You look like taxidermy, why are you doing that with your face?"

You hadn't noticed that the idea of sober you were trying to project was eyes as wide as the moon and a stone face. At Weston's words, you squinted your eyes slightly and began to grin like this was any more natural than the other face you had been making.

"You're weird," Weston tells you before he looks back at the Broflovski family. He wanted to duck back down into Ike's room to hide from everyone as much as you wanted to steal your dad's keys and drive to Dairy Queen.

"Okay, now let's do a silly one," Sandra smiled brightly, she had really drawn this out much longer than it needed to. After the family scrambled to do something vaguely comedic, Sheila motioned for your parents to join.

After what felt like a century, Sandra finally handed the phone back off to Sheila. Just when you're sure that the exchange has ended, Sheila speaks up "I want a picture of the kids together."

Your mom makes a pouty face, placing a hand on Sheila's shoulder "That's a great idea, we haven't taken one of them all together in ages."

"Let's get you two in the back then Weston and Ike can go in front," Sheila's directing you in front of an audience of coworkers and family friends.

Weston had one arm slung around Ike who did the same while Kyle stood stiffly behind his brother. You kept your tradition of keeping your distance from Kyle, standing one metre away from him and your brothers, hands clasped in front of you.

"Sweetie, you aren't in frame," Sheila tells you.

You nod but don't do anything beyond that, you just stay in the same spot that you had initially been in. "Jellybean, maybe you should move closer to Kyle," Your mom smiles softly, though her eyes are telling you that you should probably listen to her.

Taking a step that must've taken you a distance of an inch, you smile at the camera like this has resolved the issue.

"Um, Jellybean," Your mom had a begrudging smile on her face "I meant to stand next to him, behind your brother."

"I'm okay," you say and for a change have no animosity behind your words, you truly were okay with where you were.

Weston's eyebrows had furrowed in confusion as he watched you with a blissfully ignorant smile on your face. His arm was falling asleep, intertwined with Ikes. Kyle was staring at you, just as everyone else who had paid a speck of attention to the photoshoot was.

"Nope, closer," Your mom gestures for you to move in.

She does so rapidly until you take another side step, albeit larger than your last one though you still stood awkwardly out to the side like you were photobombing.

"For fuck sake," Your mom utters under her breath so quietly that no one had picked up on it. "He's not poison, get in there."

"I believe you meant to say venomous," You shuffle your feet again until you are standing next to where you should be, an awkward gap between Kyle where you were meant to be posing behind your brother.

"Don't do this right now, Jellybean," She says through gritted teeth, trying to uphold her composure for the sake of Sheila and the grace of your family.

"Just one quick picture," Sheila tells you, she's still holding up the phone, finger hovering above the shutter button.

Before you can pull any more nonsense that seemed perfectly reasonable in your altered state, you feel a hand slink around your waist. Kyle's hand rested on the outside of your midriff, fingers sinking into your soft skin. Your mind hadn't even processed this fact when he pulled you into him, your body briefly crashing against his. Kyle flashes the camera a movie star smile while you stare up at him, eyebrows furrowed and eyes incredulous. You looked like you were gearing up to yell at him.

Click!

The very second the picture is taken Kyle drops his hand from its spot on your waist and turns to walk away. While the others disperse, you stand stationary and watch Kyle disappear into the blinding light of the kitchen. It was impossible to ignore the heat creeping up your neck and the warmth flushing your cheeks as your hand retraced where his touch lingered.

Against better judgment, you follow him into the kitchen, unsure of what your plan is, but you do it regardless. He's alone in there with a middle-aged man who's speaking to someone on the phone and pays no attention to where Kyle rifles through the fridge.

"That had to be a misdemeanour of some kind," You say, arms crossed while you stand behind the fridge door.

"What are you talking about?" He looks up at you, grabs a jug of water and closes the fridge door.

"That is really fucked up," You add.

"You're kind of in my orbit right now," He holds a hand out and moves it in a circle.

"Then release me, boy." You watch as Kyle reaches into the cupboard to pull out a glass and pour water from the jug into it until it's on the brink of overflowing. He puts the jug down next to his glass and uses one hand to lean against the island.

He swishes his free hand around like he's casting a spell "I release you," Kyle then reaches for the jug instead of the glass he had poured and takes a long swig.

You shake your head watching him drink from the pitcher as if it were a cup "That's not right." You weren't sure what Kyle's tolerance was, you had never smoked with him before, only seeing him take a couple of hits at parties.

"You're not right," He answers, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and putting the jug back down on the marble countertops.

"One time I made you in the sims and then I made you go swimming in the pool so I could take the ladder out and kill you," You say, leaning against the kitchen island. The man on the phone takes a brief time to cast you a judgemental glance before going back to his phone call.

"Did I die?"

"Nah, they took that feature out so you kinda just climbed out from the side," You answer "I did make you bankrupt and homeless though."

"So I just wonder the streets?" He asks to which you nod "I bet I'm fighting crime."

"No, you just walk around and your hygiene is really bad, you're like visibly dirty."

Kyle freezes for a second, staring past you, he blinks his eyes out rapidly and holds a dinger out to hush you "I think I can hear myself blink." He continues to open and close his eyes "It sounds wet and squishy."

"Gross," You say, letting yourself lean in deeper on the island until you're almost bent in half, across from Kyle.

He runs a hand through his hair and then begins to twirl one finger in his ginger curls before he pats the top of his head "I think I need to cut my hair."

"I think you need to cut yourself," The words fall from your mouth like honey melting from the sun to weigh down the wings of Icarus. His mouth is slightly ajar when you look up to meet his wild gaze. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't say that, don't cut yourself," Had you been sober, you wouldn't have apologized, you would've doubled down and made the statement a million times worse.

"You're an asshole," He says simply.

"So are you," You respond, voice lazy and words drawn out. The man on the phone ends his call, gripping his cell phone like you were going to try and take it from him. He struts past you and Kyle, glaring at the both of you.

"Did we just blow our cover?"

"No, that's Marty, he's an alcoholic so if he tells anyone anything I'll say he's been drinking again," You shrug the question off.

"Is that right? Like morally," He clarifies. "Should we just admit we're high? or maybe that would be bad morally if we got Richie in trouble for something he didn't do." You can see the gears turning in Kyle's head, the way he's analyzing the situation like it's the equation that'll either end the world or save it "Nah, I don't wanna get grounded on my mom's birthday, that's kinda gay."

"That's super gay."

"It's so hot in here," The topic switches once again as Kyle is working on unbuttoning his shirt, taking a deep breath. The very second you notice your eyes linger a moment too long on his hands your head swerves to look at a sign that reads 'This kitchen is seasoned with love' You remember when Sheila bought it, she thought it was hilarious and brought you into the kitchen to see it.

Your mind trails back to the compromising state you and Kyle had been discovered in after the little forest expedition. The interrogation you had to endure, not only with Mr. Waterman but with Wendy as well made you want to hammer nails into your ears. "If it was anyone else but Wendy and our fucking teacher who found us, the rumours would be nuts."

"And that's the worst thing?"

"People thinking that we've slept together? Yeah, it is the worst thing. I'd probably shoot myself and write your name on the wall in my blood."

"How high are you right now?" he squints his eyes.

You shrug "Higher than I think, perhaps."

"Your eyes are kind of insane right now," He points at your face and in turn, you just rub them, too lazy to go check.

"Yours are almost as bright as your hair."

"This isn't even my final form yet."

"What the fuck," You stare at him blankly. You let yourself down the side of the island, spine scraping against it until you drop to the cold tile floors. The frigidness pressing against the back of your calves.

You tuck your head into your hands like it'll magically make you sober. You didn't want to be high anymore or at all that night. You needed a clear head, for your limbs to not feel so loose so you could go back to shutting your thoughts away, so they would die in your throat and never be said.

Kyle has plopped himself onto a stool by the island, peeling a banana from the fruit bowl with precision like he was defusing a time bomb. It seemed like he had entirely forgotten that you were there the second you went out of his sight.

It was nowhere close to your first time smoking though you had taken a little tolerance break for the sake of finals and it was hitting you hard. Everything seemed like it wasn't real like you were in a set where things were hand-crafted to fit the scene. You look down at your hands, balling them up into fists to see if you can feel anything. When all the sensation you receive is a light tap, you put one finger into your mouth and bite, there rested the confirmation that you weren't in a simulation.

What your mind was really craving was a two-leader bottle of diet coke and to curl up on the couch, shrouded in darkness and watch Over the Hedge. You reach a hand up the edge of the countertop to pull yourself up, in the midst of doing so, your foot slips and you are sent toppling over. Your body careened forward, face heading straight for the unforgiving edge of the countertop. There was a sickening crack as your nose collided with the hard surface, followed by a sharp, searing pain that shot through her skull. You collapse back down to the ground, eyes scrunched shut and hand covering your surely felt like a mangled nose.

"What was that?" Kyle turns his head to where he was sure you were though you were no longer in sight. He pries himself away from the stool and makes his way around the island to investigate "What's-oh my fucking god."

"Do you think it's broken?" You ask, moving your hand away to display the nose. The nasal bone itself seemed to be fine, but what rang as concerning was the gash over it that was leaking blood.

"Holy shit, we need to get your parents," He immediately moves to leave but you grab his leg to keep him in place.

"No," you say in what you intended to be a firm voice though it came off as more scared than anything else "We're high, underage, I hate hospitals, and urgent care is expensive."

"You're bleeding from your fucking face."

Gingerly, you poke around the area you had hit, fighting the urge to wince to prove that it wasn't that bad "See? We're good, just a bit of blood." The marijuana had eased the pain in just the slightest by offering the distraction of everything all at once, you were sure it would feel like hell the second you shook your mind clear.

"No, we aren't good, you're fucked up," He says.

"Kyle," Your tone shifts, absolutely serious "My dad will beat the shit out of me if he finds out I'm high, I'll go in the morning if it's actually bad," Truthfully, your dad probably would do some damage if the truth came out. Not only that, but he would bar Richie from seeing you or Weston ever again and your mom was something of a snitch who shared every waking thought with your dad.

He looks down at your figure on the floor, one hand pinching your nose to catch any blood that threatened to spill onto your white dress. His rational thoughts were telling him to rat the both of you out and get you to a hospital though the side of him hazed said it was fine. "You have to go in the morning."

When you move your hand, the blood begins to gush not only from your nostrils but the gash on your nose bridge like juice from cherries that had been torn apart. Now you had a red dress to match your red eyes.

"Yeah, okay cool," You say with a sigh of relief, awkwardly turning on the ground to push yourself up without having your face be inches away from Kyle's. "I need to go upstairs in the bathroom and fix this," What you were trying to get across was that you needed to at least bandage it with the first-aid kit, discreetly.

"What are you going to tell your parents when you go home and you have a huge honker on your face?"

"Um, that I got a nosebleed or that-I don't fucking know, I'll figure it out, fuck face," You answer as you stand up. With a yawn, you shifted to get up, your elbow swinging out in a careless motion. Unfortunately, Kyle had chosen that exact moment to lean forward to grab his phone off the counter, his face perilously close to your elbow's path. Adding another notch to the misfortune of that night, your elbow collided with Kyle's left eye with an audible thud.

Kyle recoiled, his hand instinctively flying to his injured eye as he let out a pained grunt. Your eyes widened in horror as you realized what you had done "Oh my god, it looks like I hit you."

"You did hit me," The anger in his voice isn't unmissable, it's dripping with something that borders between irritation and rage.

"Not on purpose," You retort, quickly wiping away the blood where it pooled above your lip. It had already made it down your face to dribble down your neck and chest before it soaked into the neckline of your dress.

Kyle winced as he gingerly touched the tender skin around his eye, his breath catching in his throat at the searing pain pulsating beneath his fingertips. "Fuck," he mutters.

You felt a tickle in your nose, the pressure builds, the discomfort intensifying with every breath then there came the dreaded sneeze. Instead of the usual sense of relief, there's only pain. A sharp, searing pain radiates from your nose, sending shockwaves of agony through your skull, a splatter of blood from your nose now on Kyles's once pristine button-up.

Your eyes squeeze shut, tears instinctively beginning to push from your eyes as you struggle to regain your composure. The sound that escapes your lips is not the usual sneeze, but a strangled gasp, a testament to the torment wreaked upon your nasal passages. "Fuck, oh my fucking god!" You scream, hands moving upward to cover your nose in the position of a prayer. "Fuck, that fucking hurts, pussy licking cunt face, fuck!"

"Jesus Christ," His voice is breathy, he hadn't entirely comprehended what you had said, his hazy brain was more focused on the throbbing pain enveloping his eye and the blood splattered on his white button-up.

A woman swings around the corner, Alysha, you barely remember what she looked like eight years prior before she bleached her hair to the point it was fried and filled her face with Botox and fillers. "Is everything okay in here?"

"No!" You shout, the vexation wasn't intention but you never thought sneezing would hurt so bad.

"What the hell," Any rage in Kyle's voice was replaced by fear as he stared at Aylsha's face. He looked like a deer caught in headlights though he couldn't bring himself to look away from her pillow face. She had so much filler to the point where her skin would turn loose if it were to be dissolved, her lips were the most obviously overfilled, looking minutes away from bursting. "I think as a society we're way too okay with that."

You brush past him, grabbing his wrist to pull him along. "we're going to the hospital." You're opinion on going to the hospital had changed in an instant. You could've managed if you hadn't sneezed, it felt worse than the initial break. Your senses are overwhelmed by the intensity of the tormenting sensation.

"Why do people do that to themselves?" He lowers his voice.

"Doesn't matter," You dismiss, dragging him into the living room where the majority of the partygoers were gathered. "Danger!" You shout and everyone turns to look at you, startle clear across their wrinkled faces. You split into a grin "There's actually no danger but I need to go to the hospital."

"Jellybean, what happened?" Your mother places her wineglass on the coffee table and rushes over to you, cradling your face in both of her hands while she examines you. Your father isn't far behind, jogging slowly like he was in an action movie, it would've been more efficient to walk over to you.

"We need to go to the hospital," You say simply, clamping your eyes shut so she won't see the redness.

"Kyle!" Sheila exclaims, eyebrows furrowing as she approaches him. She looks up at her tall son, gently touching his swelling eye, red from irritation "My little boy, what happened?" Sheila looks at you, the gash on your nose and the slightly crooked look of it "Did you two fight?"

"No," you answer abruptly, pointing at Richie who was working through a slice of cake "He's sober, he can take us to the hospital."

Richie responds with a nod before he goes back to his cake "Ready to go when you are."

"I just don't understand how this happened," your dad remarks. With each passing second that you weren't on the way to the emergency room, you grew more irritated.

"Kyle, did you hit her?" Gerald stands behind Sheila, his face stony.

"No," You interject "I hit him actually, on accident and I fell and smashed my head on the kitchen island and it really fucking hurts so can we please go?"

"Are you high?" Gerald leans in the slightest to see your red eyes to which you inch back.

"Are you?" Your dad's demeanour changes as he crosses his arms.

All eyes fell on you and you quickly scrambled for an answer, glancing at Richie who looked as panicked as ever before you fell to the conclusion "No, we're teenagers."

Everyone looks either around or at you in confusion over your chosen words. They wondered what exactly you meant by that and you wondered "So why are your eyes red?" Your dad asks.

"It doesn't matter, they need medical attention," Sheila tries to dismiss the topic.

"It's called life, little bro," You clap your hands together like you said something groundbreaking, a small smirk playing on your blood-stained face.

"This is ridiculous," Your dad shakes his head. You glance over at Kyle who's fallen nonverbal, letting his mom poke around his face.

"Because life isn't just all flowers and sausages but we're making the most out of it Gerald so why don't you live a little?" You raise your hands up in the air; in your mind, you are trailblazing by delivering this odd string of words to a crowd of wrinkled faces who watch you like a spectacle. "I would like to get my nose sewn back together.”

"Jellybean, you are acting so strange," Your mother says, catching on to the fact that you might be under the influence.

"It's because of blood loss," Richie cuts in, beginning to usher you and Kyle to the front door. "Don't worry, I'll take good care of them."

You turn your head to stare down your parents as you leave though Kyle's lanky figure blocks them out entirely. He trails behind you, one hand on the small of your back to keep you moving forward. You nearly shudder under his touch but don't make a fight to shake him off.

Sitting in the sterile confines of the hospital waiting room, you couldn't help but feel a mixture of relief and anticipation. Just moments ago, you had emerged from the emergency room, your broken nose carefully repaired by the skilled hands of doctors. Now, as you awaited your discharge, a sense of tiredness was creeping up on you. You had been there entirely too long though the edibles had yet to wear off.

Your nose was still tender, wrapped in layers of gauze and tape, a constant reminder of the trauma it had endured. But beneath the bandages lay four stitches are what was sure to be a nasty bruise. All you could process was that you really wanted a cigarette.

Kyle walks into the waiting room, he scans the few other people in there before his eyes settle on you. He stood still for a moment, thinking whether or not it would be weird if he sat next to you, he decided that it was and opted for the row opposite to you.

Your eyes wander down to his hands where he clutches a little orange bottling, rattling slightly with movement from the pills inside "You got meds already? They just gave me a slip to take to the pharmacy."

"Yup," He shakes the bottle "Did you know that you cracked my cheekbone?"

"No," you narrow your eyes "I don't have X-ray vision."

Silence hangs between the two of you, the only sound being background noise from other patients and nurses. Now that the heat of the painful moment had disbanded you were left unsure of how to talk to Kyle. You didn't even know if you had only shown him the smallest speck of kindness or if he had put his hand around your waist purely from the influence of the drugs.

"I can't believe my dad thought I would hit you," Kyle said the first thing that came to mind, staring at the bandage in the center of your face.

"I can't believe my parents cared more about me being high than having a mangled nose."

"That was kinda crazy."

"This is all kinda crazy," you answer, trying to keep your face as still as possible to avoid the pain of scrunching or moving your nose. "Are you going to tell everyone that I hit you?"

"Not if you don't want me to."

"Please don't," Your voice is hardly above a whisper when you ask this. "It was bad enough when I hit Cartman," That was true, Cartman had made you out to sound like a violent criminal in every rendition of the story he told. He had fabricated so many aspects of it that it seemed more like fiction than reality, even if people didn't believe him, it wouldn't stop them from spreading it.

"Okay," His tone matches the softness of yours "I won't."

"Thanks," You turn your gaze toward the ground, scraping your mind for something else to say so you don't feel like you're drowning beneath unsaid words. "We should smoke and then enter a hotdog eating contest."

"That's a good idea."

"Do you think we're the only ones who've had that idea?"

"I think if we smoked and went to a hot dog eating contest, everyone would be high."

"Do you think I would be a cat or a dog?" You change the topic again, not on purpose but because that was how your brain was functioning.

"I think we would both be dogs," He says with sureness.

"Yeah, maybe you would be like an Australian Sheppard and have gross crusty shit in your eyes because your owners hate you and they never clean you."

"I'm not Australian."

"Well, they don't have Jersey shepherds because I'm pretty sure you can't give dogs spray tans."

"I think I would be a Nova Scotia duck tolling retriever."

"You're not Canadian either and don't make up fake dog breeds, man," You cross your arms.

"It's not fake."

"Totally is, actually, you would be one of those fugly bald dogs that shake all of the time and people adopt them out of pity."

"All dogs are beautiful to me, actually," Kyle says in a matter-of-fact tone like you wouldn't believe his statement.

"Consumerism is so out of hand because how many water bottles do you really need?" You mind once again wondered to things that you had seen online hours prior. What was haunting you was a video of a woman who had collected 78 colours of a reusable water bottle, defeating the purpose of the eco-friendly aspect of it.

He genuinely thinks long and hard about your question "You need one good water bottle, maybe two depending on the circumstances."

"Hey, I have a joke, it's really funny and I just thought of it."

"Shoot."

"If Kyle falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, did he make any sound at all?" You crack an awkward, faltering smile. The second you said it out loud you realized that it wasn't as funny as intended. It was like you were teetering on the verge of sober, your mind so incredibly close to acting like yourself again before it slipped back into the haziness. "Yeah, it was pretty loud actually."

To your surprise, Kyle actually smiles. His lips curve upwards in a perfect arc, revealing a set of teeth that gleam like pearls against the backdrop of his sun-kissed skin. Each tooth is straight and even, with a dazzling whiteness that seems almost too pristine to be real. You couldn't think back to the last time he smiled at something you said without being sarcastic. Digging through your brain you weren't sure that he had ever smiled at you.

You furrow your eyebrows, mouth pulled back in a grimace, eyes squinting like his perfect grin was an offensive sight "Don't smile at me like that." You could feel your jaw tensing "Jesus, don't smile at me at all."

"Hey kids," Richie had returned, coming to your rescue just when you thought you were going to shatter from the conflict in your mind "Brought you these, a little souvenir from the gift shop," He tossed both of you a Garfield stuffed animal. Garfield looks almost frightening, his half-lidded eyes uneven, weird body emaciated, and fur pale like he's been experimenting. You loved it.

"Thanks," You smile up at your uncle, being careful not to let Garfield touch your blood-stained dress. Kyle has a small grin playing on his face as he holds it in his large hands.

"You got it," He gives you a quick thumbs up "So if everyone is in the clear are we good to go? You and Kyle both nod and Richie turns on his heels, swinging an arm in motion for you to follow him, his car keys jingling in one hand.

The automatic doors slid open as the three of you neared them, the night on the other side of them was brisk. As you and Kyle slipped into the back seat of Richie's prius, you couldn't help but cast one more look at him; a final look at his hooked nose and sharp jaw while you could still write it off as being high.

#kyle broflovski #south park #kyle south park #south park x reader #south park x y/n #stan marsh #eric cartman #kenny mccormick #bebe stevens #kyle broflovski x reader #south park headcanons #south park hcs #kyle broflovski angst #sp kyle #kyle brovlofski #south park kyle #kyle broflovski fluff

22 notes · View notes

bloodyquillink-blog · 2 days

Text

Animals, CoD Ghosts HC’s

What animals/creatures are the Ghosts?

A/N🪶: These are just my options! Feel free to send me yours. These are for all the Ghosts, including former, deceased and current within the Ghosts game. This list will include Rorke, Ajax and Elias Walker. Also this is going to be formatted differently from the first HC, Natural Disasters.

David “Hesh” Walker - German Shepard

Hesh is loyal, probably to a fault. Willing to do whatever it takes to protect the ones he loves and get the job done, even if he gets injured in the process.

^ Bringing me to my next point, Hesh is very protective of his family. The mere idea of anyone getting hurt is enough to get this man baring his teeth and attacking.

In the Natural Disasters list, I mentioned that Hesh, according to Urban Dictionary, means courageous, another trait of German Shepards.

One more trait that applies is also Shepards, really any animal in general, being alert as well. This is a given, though, considering he is a soldier in active war zones especially with such effective and deadly enemies. He needs to make every second count and can’t afford to slack in these areas.

I should mention that Shepards are obedient yet stubborn. Hesh knows when to listen to his superiors but he’ll easily let you know when he doesn’t agree with something. Think about when Merrick, Keegan and Elias (mask on) picked them up and Hesh was yelling about their dad still being caught in the crossfire. Merrick got Hesh to sit his ass down but Hesh was clearly not happy about it, understandably.

Logan Walker - Mountain Lion

Mountain lions can’t roar and Logan can’t, or —depending on your headcanons, consciously chooses not to— talk.

Logan finds other methods of communicating, for example, when he and Keegan were about to bust into the room to get to Ajax, Logan used his fingers to count down.

The National Wildlife Federation website says “Mountain lions are territorial and solitary. They use pheromones and physical signs… to define their territory.” (Mountain Lion, Fun Fact.)

Mountain lions are known for being very stealthy predators, again a given considering the fact we’re talking about the Ghosts.

The Mountain Lion Foundation describes them as being relentless hunters which almost connects it to the wiki quote for Logan that calls him a cold-blooded killer and an excellent soldier (CoD Ghosts: Wiki, Logan Walker, Personality.).

Elias T. “Scarecrow” Walker - Black Bear

Scary but not as scary as you may expect.

While Elias is certainly ready to do his job at any point no matter how bloody, he still has his weak spots, that being his sons.

He’s caring but while be stoic when necessary. He’s not territorial but will protect his friends and family when the time calls for it.

Also one detail I find cute about bears is that they have DNA relation to dogs, albeit very distant. I like to call bears giant murder puppies :D

Thomas A. Merrick - Grizzly Bear

I want to say that grizzly bears are often considered to be more dangerous than black bears and more likely to attack if given a reason to.

Both grizzlies and black bears can charge but where black bears may shift away at the last second and avoid attacking, grizzlies may continue to charge and attack their target (once again I’m thinking about Merrick punching Rorke because it just makes me laugh, that man was not ready).

Of course, Merrick is dangerous but he knows when the time is and isn’t appropriate despite his temper. Merrick is a big dude too, so I think this works (“stocky”).

Gabriel T. Rorke - Polar Bear

Once he has his sights on you, you’re already gone.

Hehe, polar bears are mighty dangerous.

Polar bears are bigger and stronger sometimes, but other time grizzlies and polars can be about the same in build.

Polar bears are more likely to attack considering they have fewer resources for food and typically eat a lot as well.

Fun fact: Polar bears don’t hibernate.

^^^ Piggy backing off that, Rorke doesn’t seem to be resting. He’s always planning something, whether it be a plan B or future plans.

He’s a very large and commanding presence who will find alternatives when desperate, willing to do what he must to make sure his plans are completed.

Keegan P. Russ - Leopard

Fast, sneaky. You don’t know he’s there until it’s too late.

Fun Fact: Leopards can roar. Keegan, though very quiet, stills speaks and intimidates with his voice when necessary.

Leopard’s are solitary and ambush hunters, I don’t need to explain this but I will.

If you recall, Rorke had a lot of trouble getting his nasty ass hands on Keegan after kidnapping the Walker family and Merrick.

His first objective was to find Keegan. In my eyes, it’s because he knows that as long as Keegan is alive, Rorke isn’t safe.

Like many animals, leopards care for one another, seen with families. I think Keegan is a very caring person but he avoids showing it often, which is fair.

Keegan continuously checks in with Logan throughout the game. In the underwater mission, he made sure Logan was okay. If you look closely when walking behind Keegan on the submarine, Keegan turns his head back to us briefly.

Alex V. “Ajax” Johnson - Elephant

Ajax is smart and powerful, I want to say he’s very determined.

In the short time we knew him, he was very stubborn as well. He didn’t give up anything and held out for a while. Though he was a lower rank than the other characters.

In his last moments, he made sure the last Ghosts knew what was happening in a last ditch effort to keep them safe and aware.

It’s hard to pin down super specific traits due to the fact that elephants can exhibit many and there’s not much we can give to Ajax.

I want to say that Ajax was more laid-back with his friends and comrades, leaving his bold energy for those who don’t deserve his respect ( insert the iconic scene where Ajax puts up his middle finger right at the Federation soldier ).

Like all the animals and characters on this list, Ajax was dangerous when necessary. He wasn’t spending every moment trying to be scary or intimidating or anything. He’s confident in himself and his abilities and he doesn’t need anyone else to speak up for him.

The respect we hear given to him by the Ghosts after his death was well deserved.

Love you, Ajax <3

Kick - Monitor Lizard

Some kind of reptile (I was so tempted to put him as a Gila Monster but I can’t do that to my best boi).

I’d say probably a water monitor.

These lizards, which can grow to 9 feet btw, don’t surprise their prey, but “actively pursue” them.

While these creatures have venom, but it’s not necessarily fatal.

Kick is definitely dangerous when he’s needed but it’s not like a “I am the grim reaper.” type of thing, it’s more like “I have a job to do and you won’t be in my way.”.

These creatures are known for being intelligent which lines up with Kick’s likely (not confirmed?) role as an information specialist.

The main thing that doesn’t quite line up is the fact that water monitors can be friendly whereas Kick is, if not more stand-offish, then solitary. I do imagine that he eventually opens up, but he’s definitely more comfy with his computers.

Neptune - Owl

I imagine that Neptune, being one of the original Ghosts, is very wise, though more subtle. I can’t think of what kind of owl he’d be, maybe snowy.

I mostly just wanted to include him here. Feel free to add onto him.

Riley… Riley

The most dangerous creature ever, himself.

World’s Best Throat-Snatcher over here being a cutie patootie with blood on his maw. 10/10 best boi.

25 notes · View notes

tenebraevesper · 12 hours

Text

Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Final Haunt Arc)

[...]

''Got it!'' Amy nodded, with Sonic curling up into a ball and hit him with her hammer. Sonic flew above the Buzz Bombers, right towards the Egg Hornet. However, Eggman saw this, pressing another button that unleashed another homing missle, hitting Sonic mid-air and knocking him out.

''Sonic!'' Lucas shouted as the cobalt hedgehog fell, dazed from the explosion, while Eggman laughed gleefully that he got the last hit on his nemesis.

There was a sudden flash of light blue light, with a dark figure catching Sonic mid-air, followed by another flash of light, with both the dark figure and Sonic landing on the ground safely. Sonic groaned in pain, feeling dazed and his vision clearing as he looked up at the person who saved him and was currently carrying him bridal style.

''Shadow?'' Sonic was stunned to see his rival.

''You can't go one day without running into trouble, do you?'' Shadow responded. Sonic's eyes narrowed.

''I don't think you're the one to talk about avoiding trouble,'' he responded.

Shadow avoided his gaze, clearly feeling troubled, but then added in an irked tone, ''Do you want me to drop you, Faker?''

''Nah, I'm good. Feels nice being carried around,'' Sonic responded, smirking. Shadow just rolled his eyes and dropped him regardless, with Sonic hitting the ground with a hard 'thud'.

[...]

''I suppose this brings us to what I had experienced,'' Rouge said, sitting on the table, her legs crossed. ''I can verify that your friends had indeed been abducted by Mephiles and his partner, but I don't really know what exactly had happened before I had arrived.'' Her eyes narrowed as she added in a more serious tone, ''Whatever they had done to your friends, it broke Touka. The last I saw her, she seemed to have suffered from some kind of mental breakdown. She just… shut down.''

''I guess that explains why Shadow left so soon,'' Sonic commented, his tone solemn.

[...]

''Honestly, I think it would be a good idea to give them some time and space to process what had happened,'' Makoto suggested. ''We can talk to them once they're ready.''

''I think that's a good idea,'' Lucas replied, glancing at Sonic. The latter had his head lowered, clearly thinking about his teammates. Lucas knew his partner well enough to be aware that Sonic wouldn't let this be so easily.

xXx

Three days… Three days of complete radio silence from both Touka and Shadow. Lucas had sent Touka a message to ask her how she's doing, but there was no reply. She didn't even read it.

''We should go check on them.''

''I'm not sure. You know that neither Touka and Shadow have a tendency to check their messages. Maybe we should leave them alone for the time being.''

''I don't think so. What if they never answer?''

''…''

Sonic frowned as he sped through the streets of Neos City, the conversation he had with Lucas still echoing in his head. He knew that Lucas was worried about Touka and Shadow, but unlike his partner, he felt that they should actually confront the two rather to leave them on their own. Still, he agreed to wait. Fortunately, he didn't have to worry about Eggman, as the Doctor didn't show up after the attack three days ago. He and the rest of the gang had figured that he was occupied with something else, with Rouge having admitted that she did mess with the computer at the Egg Base, so he would remain busy with that.

So, in the meantime, Sonic decided to occupy himself with testing out his new ability, which he referred to as the ''Boost''. He had figured out that, in order to trigger it, he would have to remain focused and steady while he increased his speed in small bursts. It did drain him of his own energy, but it was something he could use without using Chaos Surge, so he felt it was worth it. While his stamina was finite, he had more than enough of it for the training sessions. As a matter of fact, he actually wanted to show off his new ability to Shadow, maybe challenge him to a race. However, given the current circumstances, he wondered whether that was even possible.

What I didn't tell Lucas was that I also sent a few messages to Shadow, asking him how he's doing. Sonic sweatdropped as he pondered about the ebony hedgehog's reactions to his messages, figuring that his rival was probably annoyed by them. At least he could see that he was reading them, so that was a good thing. I still don't think that's a good idea, leaving them alone without even knowing whether they'll be fine or not. Sonic hummed. Maybe I should pay them a little visit, just in case.

Grinding to a halt, he turned around on his heel and sped right towards the Kageura residence.

xXx

''…''

Touka was lying in her bed, having pulled the blanket over her head and staring at the wall, her back turned towards Shadow. The ebony hedgehog was sitting on the swivel chair, just staring at her in silence as he thought about how things have been like this the past three days. After he had warped both of them home, Touka went to the bathroom, closing it right behind her and didn't come out of it for hours. When she did, Shadow noted how she had washed off Sakamoto's blood, having thrown Tomoe's light blue dress into the trash, and how her eyes were dark and red, having clearly spent a good amount of time crying her heart out. She barely spoke as she walked into her room, her only words being:

''I don't want to talk to anyone. I want to be left alone.''

That was the last 'conversation' they had before Touka once again completely shut down emotionally, barely even acknowledging him.

Shadow felt an overwhelming sense of guilt while watching her like this, just wasting away, but there was nothing he could do. There were times when he wanted to talk to Touka, but what was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to comfort her? He knew what was on her mind, but at the same time, he felt like she was a complete stranger to him. This was not the Touka he knew; she wasn't the determined, mischievous and protective older sister who took comforted him when he was at his lowest, who was defiant to the point of going against anyone who had authority or control over them and making them listen to her. She was always so strong, something Shadow deeply admired, but now? Now she was broken, a former shell of herself.

Shadow blamed himself for this, even though he knew that this was not his fault whatsoever. He wished that he could've done more to protect her, to shield her from the unfortunate truth. They both wanted to learn more about their past and they dug to deep, eventually getting buried in it. And when he didn't feel guilt, he was overwhelmed by the sensation of rage, the same kind he felt when he woke up after years of believing his beloved sister had died at his hand. The voice in the back of his mind returned, convinced him to find someone, anyone, and take his anger out on them, to punish them for what they had done to Touka. The first person who came to his mind was Sakamoto… and that's when the voice turned cold and the memory of his death replayed in his mind over and over again, like a broken tape. Shadow felt not pity for the man after what he had done to them, but the sudden brutality of his death did make his stomach squirm.

Shadow's ears twitched at the sound of voices coming from downstairs. He glanced at the hatch, unable to make out anything specific with his sensitive hearing, but he was sure that there was someone else in the downstairs besides Kisaki. He glanced at Touka, who hadn't moved from her position, having refused to leave her room unless absolutely necessary. He wanted to be there for her, and yet he couldn't.

He felt like a failure.

Sighing, Shadow got up and opened the hatch, leaping down into the hallway and walking to the stairs, the voices becoming louder. He stopped in the middle of the stairs, where he wouldn't be seen by anyone but still hear the ongoing conversation in the living room. Just as he had assumed, one of the voices was Kisaki's, but the other…

Sonic. Shadow frowned harder, clenching his fist as he listened in.

''Thanks once again for letting me in, Kisaki,'' Sonic said as Kisaki brought him a coaster and a glass of orange juice. ''I guess Shadow and Touka are at home as well, right?''

''Yeah, they are,'' Kisaki replied, as she sat down on the couch, sighing heavily. ''Unfortunately, neither of them is in the mood to talk. Touka has basically locked herself up in her room and Shadow refuses to say anything. I only see him whenever he comes down to get food for Touka.'' She pressed her fingers against her temple. ''I don't know what is going on with the two. Just a few days ago, they were both fine, if a little brooding, but now…''

Kisaki trailed off, clearly deeply concerned by the whole situation. Sonic's ears were pinned back as he thought about whether he should tell her what he knew. He wasn't that familiar with the relationship Touka and Shadow had from Kisaki, aside from the fact that Kisaki was Touka's adoptive mother on paper only and Touka never considered her a parental figure. However, seeing just how worried Kisaki was about her adoptive daughter, he decided that it would be the right thing to say something.

''I've heard that the two had been through a really traumatizing event. I don't know the details, though,'' Sonic responded. It wasn't a complete lie – he really didn't know all the details besides what Rouge had told them about witnessing Sakamoto's death, but he figured that Kisaki was better off without knowing that part. He reached for the orange juice, taking a sip out of the glass.

''I see… Thanks for telling me,'' Kisaki muttered, noting how Sonic was glancing at the stairs after putting the glass back on the coaster and fidgeting anxiously. ''If you want to talk to them, you can try, but I doubt you'll suceed.''

''I know you said that Touka and Shadow refuse to talk to you, but I'm persistent. Maybe I could get them…'' Sonic trailed off when Kisaki shook her head.

''It's not just that,'' she said, taking a deep breath. ''Listen, I know Touka and Shadow for a long time now, and when it comes to Touka, her being this closed off is not normal. I have never seen her behave like this, and I fear that, whatever had happened, it may have broken her mind. However, before you even get to talk to her, you would have to deal with Shadow.''

''Don't worry, I already know how to handle him,'' Sonic replied confidently, only to be met with Kisaki shaking her head again.

''I'm sure that you're well aware of just how protective Shadow is of Touka,'' Kisaki started, with Sonic nodding, having witnessed it first-hand. ''This kind of loyalty runs quite deep, and when put in the right mindset, Shadow will refuse to listen to anyone but Touka. This is one of those situations.'' Kisaki glanced at the stairs. ''I had tried to go to talk to Touka, but Shadow refuses to let me inside the room. He had told me that Touka wants to be left alone, and he's enforcing her will with an iron fist. So, unless you want to get caught up in a fight, I doubt you'll get through any of them.''

''So, Touka willingly put herself into isolation and Shadow's supporting her decision,'' Sonic voiced his thoughts, a little astounded. He knew that these two weren't particularly social, but he felt that this was going too far. He then gave Kisaki a confident grin. ''Well, I'm not afraid to get into a fight if necessary. I already know how Shadow is like.''

''There is one more thing I need to tell you,'' Kisaki added, feeling a tiny spark of hope when she saw just how confident Sonic was. She had to wonder if the blue hedgehog would be able to get drag the two out of their self-imposed isolation. ''I don't think Shadow wants this either.''

''You mean, isolating himself and Touka?'' Sonic asked, giving her a curious look. Kisaki nodded.

''Shadow may not be someone who is open with his emotions, but I could tell that he's frustrated with the whole situation and himself, and he doesn't know how to fix it. He knows Touka is hurt and he's doing everything in his power to prevent anyone from hurting her further, even if it means to keep her isolated.''

''That's even more reason for me to confront him,'' Sonic responded, grinning confidently. ''Just leave it all to me. I'm sure I'll be able to fix this.''

Shadow, who was listening to this, scowled, and walked back upstairs into his and Touka's bedroom, not wanting to listen to anything anymore. To his surprise, he saw Touka on her feet, all dressed up. She still had that solemn look on her expression, but she wasn't anymore hiding under the bedcovers.

''Touka, are you-?''

''I wanted to go outside. Are you coming with me?'' Touka asked, extending her arm. Shadow nodded, taking it and he could feel through his glove that her hand was cold and clammy. She was clearly not feeling well, but he figured that this was still better than nothing. There was a flash of blue light, and a moment later, they vanished.

A few minutes passed, with Sonic opening the hatch to the room, surprised to see that it was empty. ''Hey, they're gone!''

''What? But, we didn't see them leave!'' Kisaki shouted back from downstairs. Sonic ran up to her.

''They probably warped away. Don't worry, I'll find them and talk some sense into them,'' he said. Kisaki just put her hand over her mouth, supporting her elbow with her other hand as the hedgehog dashed off, hoping that he was right.

[...]

''I… I wasn't supposed to be like this…'' she said, shaking. ''I'm… I don't deserve any of this. I-I stole another person's life. I'm living a lie.'' Touka bit her lip, feeling as if someone was outright choking her. She couldn't breathe. ''I… Sometimes, I wish I was never created at all.''

Shadow felt like he was thrown into icy cold water, any breath he had vanishing and his eyes wide as he stared at his older sister. He knew that the situation was bad, but he had no idea it was this grim.

''Touka, don't say things like that!'' he suddenly shouted at her, only to immediately regret it.

''Shadow, please, just leave…'' Touka turned to him, her tone suddenly firm. Her eyes were still hazy from the tears, but there was an unmistakable look of determination in them. ''I don't want you to be around me anymore,… for your sake. You've done enough for me. More than enough.''

Shadow stared at her silently, unable to come up with a response. He wanted to respect her wish, but at the same time, he feared what would happened if he did. Sighing, Shadow got up and stepped in front of Touka.

''If I leave now and return later, will you still be here?'' he asked, his ruby eyes narrowing as he stared straight at her. Touka didn't respond. ''Touka, promise me that you will be here when I return.''

''Shadow, I…''

''Promise!''

Touka was caught off guard when Shadow suddenly snapped at her, staring at him for a moment, before slowly nodding.

''I promise,'' she whispered. Shadow just nodded in response and turned around, walking away. He hated the idea of leaving her alone, but if that was what she wanted, he wanted to respect it. He knew that while he was away, he'd be clutching onto this promise with his dear life, his only hope that Touka wouldn't do something to endanger herself.

Besides, he still had something else he needed to take care of. He walked onto the street and, just as he predicted, saw a blue streak of light zooming towards him. Sonic was relieved to have found Shadow, having searched the whole city for him and Touka.

''Hey, Shads, I was just-!''

POW!

Before Sonic could even finish his sentence, he was sent flying by Shadow, who punched him straight in the face. Sonic landed on the ground, shaking his head and rubbing his cheek, which was burning to the touch. He stared at Shadow, who was glaring daggers at him as he approached him, hands balled into fists, baring his fangs, completely livid.

''What makes you think that you have the right to stick your nose into my personal matters?!''

Shadow took another step as Sonic quickly got up. ''Shads, I know that you're angry, but I just want to help you.''

''I don't want your help!''

Shadow grabbed Sonic by his neck, lifting him up as they vanished in a flash of blue light. Sonic then felt a sharp pain in his back as Shadow slammed him against a wall. He realized that the wall was actually the underpass where they had one of their previous battles, not too far from the park they were previously at.

''I have enough of your self-righteousness! Only because you get to play hero, you think you can now be everyone's savior!'' Shadow growled furiously. ''Let me make something clear, Sonic! You can't fix everything! You can't fix me and you can't fix Touka! So stop trying!''

Shadow suddenly stumbled back as Sonic managed to kick him in the stomach, forcing him to let go of his rival. Sonic rubbed his neck, taking a deep breath. ''Okay, I get it. You're frustrated that things are falling apart. I understand. However, if you just talked to me about what happened, then…''

''There is nothing to talk about,'' Shadow cut him off, his tone harsh and cold. He was done with Sonic's antics. Sonic, on the other hand, sighed.

''Okay, then. I guess we'll have to do it the hard way,'' he said, stretching his arms above his head before getting into a battle stance and smirking. ''You know, I was actually looking forward to this, Faker.''

''I'll make you regret ever approaching me in the first place,'' Shadow responded.

The two hedgehogs then rushed forward into another clash.

[...]

Sonic dodged a punch from Shadow, which was followed by another punch, then a kick. Sonic just kept up avoiding the blows until he could find a good opening, but Shadow was relentless. Sure, Sonic fought him before a couple of times, but he had never seen him this furious. Although, he'd take furious Shadow over Shadow who had nothing left to fight for any day. Sonic briefly glanced back, noting the wall behind him, and he managed to dodge another sweeping kick to his head, stepping back and using the wall to bounce and tackle Shadow to the ground, trying to pin him down.

''Do you have enough?'' Sonic asked, grinning as he pressed Shadow's shoulders down. Shadow's response was to kick him with his knee, leaving Sonic reeling from the pain and then punching him again in the chest.

''Hmph, I've seen better from you,'' Shadow responded, staring at Sonic coldly as the latter recovered from the hit.

''Yeah… You did,'' Sonic responded, suddenly dashing forward.

Shadow braced himself for an attack, but Sonic zoomed past him, circling around him in a zig-zag manner to confuse him. Shadow kept calm, though, having understood what Sonic was planning to do, and when Sonic vanished from his sight, Shadow turned around, expecting a sneak attack from behind. However, instead, Sonic performed a homing attack from above, hitting Shadow and knocking him down. Sonic leapt back with a smirk on his expression as Shadow slowly got back up, knowing well his rival wouldn't just go down from one attack.

Admittedly, Sonic's plan wasn't to defeat Shadow. He just wanted the latter to vent his aggression through a battle and calm down so they could have a proper conversation. It was a simple stalling tactic, at least on paper, but Shadow was everything but simple. Sonic just hoped that he'd have enough stamina for this battle.

''Chaos Spear!''

''Yikes!'' Sonic managed to side-step the energy spear, letting it fly past him, feeling a little alarmed. If Shadow was willing to use his Chaos Powers, then things just got more complicated.

Another Chaos Spear formed in Shadow's hands, but instead of throwing it, Shadow used more like a weapon, swiping at Sonic. The cobalt hedgehog curled up, doing a spin attack at Shadow, who used the Chaos Spear to block the latter, energy sparking all around them. As the Chaos Spear dissipated, Sonic bounced back, uncurling, with a faint scent of burnt fur filling his nostrils. Before he could do anything about it, Shadow suddenly charged it for another punch, but to both of their surprise, Sonic blocked this one by grabbing Shadow's arm.

''You know, if you already want to fight me, then at least we can also talk!'' Sonic told him, sweep kicking Shadow, who leapt back, dodging the attack.

''There is nothing to talk about!'' Shadow growled. However, Sonic persisted, avoiding another punch and kicking Shadow in the chest.

''I understand that you're angry at me. I probably shouldn't have sent you so many messages either…''

''You spammed me 50 messages per day!''

POW!

Shadow managed to punch Sonic in the face, sending him flying. Sonic landed on the ground, shaking his head. ''Ughhh… I guess I deserved that one.'' He quickly got up, having to use his super speed to dodge another punch form Shadow as the latter warped right in front of him. ''However, I still think you should've just gone out and talked to someone than isolating yourself!''

''I don't want your advice!''

Sonic rushed down the street, forced to dodge Shadow's attempts at punching and kicking him as he warped around him. He saw a street lamp, rushed towards it and used it to circle around, kicking Shadow right in the gut as he warped in front of Sonic. Shadow fell on one knee, glaring at his rival as he clutched his stomach.

''I'm not saying that you have to take my advice. I just want to understand what is going through your head. I know that you're traumatized-'' Sonic replied when, suddenly, Shadow tackled him, warping both right back to the underpass and pinning Sonic below him.

''What do you know about trauma?!'' Shadow snarled furiously, glaring daggers at Sonic. ''What do you know about losing the most important person in your life?! What do you know how it feels when the whole world is against you?!''

''I… don't…'' Sonic responded in a defeated tone. Shadow stared at him, still angry, but noticeably calmer after hearing Sonic's response. He furrowed a brow when Sonic then looked back at him with a determined gaze. ''However, I know that you're feeling really lonely, as if everyone had abandoned you, and that you're carrying a huge responsibility on your shoulders. I want you to help with that burden, because I understand that feeling of loneliness. I told you before, and I'm telling you now, even if this is the path you have chosen, I won't give up. I will continue to fight for my friends, for Neos City, and especially for you, Shadow. So, stop being so stubborn!''

To Shadow's surprise, Sonic managed to kick him off him, causing him to stumble backwards, with Sonic getting ip on his feet. He expected Shadow to attack him again, but instead, the latter just stared at him with a steely gaze.

''Why?'' Shadow asked, suddenly walking towards Sonic, who quickly stepped back, feeling a little nervous, only to feel the wall behind him once again, with Shadow slamming his palm next to Sonic's head, keeping Sonic pinned against the wall once again. Shadow stepped even closer, with Sonic catching a faint scent of lavender coming from him. ''Why are you so determined to be so close to me?''

''Because I think you're an interesting person and I like hanging out with you. It's simple as that,'' Sonic responded in a chipper tone, giving Shadow a smug grin. Shadow's expression fell, avoiding eye-contact with Sonic.

''Right… It's simple as that,'' Shadow muttered, stepping back, his ears drooping as he stared at the ground, fists clenched. Sonic exhaled, feeling relieved that Shadow had finally calmed down. Shadow then looked back, his glare sending shivers down Sonic's spine, making him wonder if Shadow found another reason to be angry at him. ''You're still insisting on that, despite me showing no interest in being your friend like the others do. I agreed to being your ally and rival, but nothing beyond that.''

''Well, regardless of what you think, I still consider you my friend,'' Sonic replied happily, much to Shadow's chagrin. ''So, what happened to you and Touka? If you don't want to talk about it, could you at least give me a hint or something?'' Sonic noted the glare Shadow shoot at him, his ears drooping. ''Okay, I know I'm not really the best person when it comes to talking things out, especially emotional stuff. Amy's way better at this, so if you're more comfortable with that, we could go to talk to her. Or if you prefer a more blunt approach over a compassionate one, we could also talk to Minami.''

Shadow remained silent, giving Sonic a steely gaze, then lowered his head, staring somberly at the ground, arms folded across his chest. He closed his eyes when he felt a hand on his shoulder, followed by a surprisingly gentle tone coming from Sonic, ''Shads, I'm serious. You're not alone. If you still believe that, then I'll be always here to remind you that you have a friend by your side.''

''You're really a thorn in my side,'' Shadow responded, with Sonic feeling a little concerned, only to see Shadow's expression change to a more vulnerable one. He sighed, showing a pained look as he continued, ''I-I feel like I'm losing Touka again.''

''Shadow…''

''What we learned at that place, the truth… It completely broke her. I never saw her like this before; it's like she has turned into an empty shell of the person she used to be,'' Shadow explained, his hands falling by his side and clenched his fist, shaking. ''I hate seeing her like this and it frustrates me that there is absolutely nothing I can do to help her. I want to protect her, but how do you protect someone who is hurting themselves? I feel like a failure.''

''Shadow, I don't think you have failed,'' Sonic said, stepping up, with Shadow giving him a look of genuine surprise, only for it to change to a frown when Sonic placed his arm around his shoulder. ''I see this as a setback. Yeah, things were going great before, but you tripped and now you don't know how to continue. All you can do now is get up and keep going.''

''I'll consider your advice… Would you take your arm off my shoulder?'' Shadow growled.

''Sorry,'' Sonic quickly stepped back, grinning sheepishly. ''Also, next time you feel like venting your frustrations through a battle, just ask. I'm always up for a sparring match.''

''I'll keep that in mind,'' Shadow responded. Sonic just smiled at him happily, with Shadow still feeling a little irked by his positive outlook, but at the same time, the weight he felt on his shoulders wasn't as heavy as before. He was too used to act and fight on his own, with only Touka by his side, and he felt like there wasn't anyone beside her he could trust. Sure, there was also Kisaki, who would watch over them, but even then, they would exclude her from many things. During their life at the Codex Research Facility, they had developed an ''us against the world'' mentality and it was hard to shake it off. He hated the fact that he had just cracked under the pressure, but at the same time, he knew that he had to accept outside help to find a solution to this problem. It was quite frustrating for him, but at the same time, he felt a sense of relief.

''Now, let's go pick up Touka and…'' Sonic was about to walk away when, suddenly, a bunch of crystals shoot out of the ground, stopping him in his tracks. ''Whoa- What was that?!''

Both suddenly heard a cold chuckle coming from somewhere above. They ran out of the underpass, spotting a shadow-like figure hovering on the top of it. Shadow frowned, growling, ''Mephiles!''

''It was quite amusing watching you fight and struggle, but having you heal from your emotional trauma is certainly not part of the plan,'' Mephiles told him. Sonic glanced at Shadow, then back at Mephiles, realizing that this was the ARNav Rouge had told them about.

''Dude, what are you talking about?'' Sonic asked the Dark, while Shadow understood immediately.

''You didn't bring us to that place just to meet Prof. Sakamoto. His death was planned from the start,'' he said, with Sonic giving him a confused look. Mephiles gazed at him, at first not answering to his accusation, but then relented.

''I see that you put quite some thought into what had happened,'' Mephiles started. ''You're correct in your assumption though. The reason Toshiro and I brought you to meet Prof. Sakamoto is because we hoped that you would eventually succumb to your prior programming as a weapon after learning the truth and go on a rampage. The additional trauma you and Touka had experienced was just the cherry on the top and I sincerely enjoyed seeing you at your lowest. Touka's breakdown was especially amusing. Is it true that she has actually become suicidal?''

''You-'' Shadow gritted his teeth, baring his fangs. ''You'll pay for what you've done to Touka!''

''Hmph, I'd like to see you try!'' Mephiles rose up his arm, with flames suddenly bursting from the crystals that had sprouted from the ground, going right after Shadow. Sonic quickly tackled his rival, getting both of them away from the fire.

''This guy looks like real trouble,'' Sonic said, with Shadow glancing at him, noting the determined look on Sonic's expression. Sonic winked confidently, ''How about we take him down together?''

''How about we make it a competition and see who gets the most hits?'' Shadow responded, with Sonic grinning widely, looking excited.

''Now you're talking!''

Both nodded and then turned towards Mephiles, who just frowned in return. This was not the kind of reaction he wanted to see.

[...]

Both Sonic and Shadow dodged a wall of flames Mephiles sent towards them. Sonic then used his super speed to rush towards the Dark, only to be surprised by a barrage of sharp crystals growing out of the ground. Fortunately for him, Shadow fired a Chaos Spear, shattering the crystals and clearing the path for Sonic, who launched into a spin attack towards Mephiles. However, instead of hitting the Dark, he spun right into the flames that Mephiles had conjured.

''Sonic!'' Shadow shouted as he saw a ball of fire emerge from the flames, spinning and hitting a nearby wall. He uncurled, clearly dazed and singed. Shadow then turned to Mephiles, who fired a whirl of flames towards him. Shadow warped around them, about to punch Mephiles, only to pass through him, with the shadow-like copy disappearing and Mephiles appearing right behind him.

''You're so predictable,'' Mephiles hissed, with Shadow turning around in an attempt to roundhouse kick him in one swift motion, but the Dark already merged with the hedgehog's shadow, avoiding the attack. Shadow looked down, only to for crystals to sprout from the ground, enveloping the dark hedgehog completely.

''Shadow!'' Sonic screamed, holding onto his hurt arm, his eyes wide as he saw the ghastly crystallic structure with Shadow in the middle of it, trapped. Mephiles emerged from the shadows on the ground, looking at his little masterpiece in interest.

''I expected you to put more of a fight,'' he said. ''But, I suppose I should've expected this from someone so weak-minded and easy to manipulate.'' Mephiles then turned to Sonic, who tried to ignore the pain in his arm and took a battle stance. ''I suggest you to back down unless you want to end up the same as this idiot. My business is with Shadow.'' Mephiles' gaze then changed for a moment. ''Although, I wouldn't mind taking you down as well.''

''I know that you hurt Shadow and Touka, and I will make sure that you- huh?'' Sonic cut himself off as he saw a glowing red light behind Mephiles. The Dark too turned around, realizing that the red glow was coming from Shadow, his whole body enveloped in crimson light.

''Chaos BLAST!''

The crystallic prison exploded due to the blast of red energy, with Shadow falling down on his knee, breathing heavily, the glow in his eyes fading. Unfortunately, he had to use up a lot of energy just to free himself from Mephiles' trap and he was winded from the attack. Still, he got up, glaring at his opponent. Mephiles' eyes narrowed as he stared back. He had to admit, Shadow was stubborn. Nevertheless, he was the one standing on the top. The so-called Ultimate Lifeform and his equal were clearly unable to make a scratch on him.

''I had fun playing, but-'' Before Mephiles could even end his sentence, he suddenly felt something wrap around his chest, pulling him backwards. A string? Before he could even respond in any way, whoever was holding onto the string swung him into the wall of the underpass, causing him to hit it hard and fall over.

''You're being really mean.''

''Big?!'' Sonic and Shadow's eyes widened in complete surprise when Big emerged, holding a fishing pole, with Froggy on his shoulder. He was glaring at Mephiles, who cut through the string with his claws and glared back at Big. Rest assured, he clearly didn't expect for him to appear in join the fight.

''Why you-?!'' Mephiles felt a sense of rage overwhelming him. He made it clear that no one was going to even put a scratch on him and if this purple cat wanted to participate in this battle, he would make him pay. However, before he could do that, Shadow suddenly rushed forwards, using the moment of distraction to launch an attack at Mephiles. Unfortunately for him, Mephiles turned back, creating once again a wall of fire to stopped Shadow in his tracks. ''Tch, you can't defeat me!''

''Leave my brother alone!''

Too distracted by what was going on in front of him, Mephiles didn't even register Touka sneaking up behind him, holding a pipe in her hand and whacking him over the head with it. She glared at him as he fell over, seething with rage. Shadow was shocked to see her here, only to get elbowed by Sonic.

''Hey, Shads, remind me to never make Touka angry,'' he said, a soft grin on his lips. Shadow couldn't help but grin in response, as this was the Touka he was familiar with. The teenager dropped the pipe and then ran past Mephiles and towards the hedgehogs, Big and Froggy.

''Are you guys okay?'' she asked, a look of concern on her expression.

''It's nothing that we can't walk off,'' Sonic responded in a casual tone. Shadow gave her a worried look.

''What about you?'' he asked. Touka shook her head, responding with a look of guilt.

''I'm so sorry for making you all worried about me,'' she replied. Shadow was about to respond, but Sonic interrupted the two.

''You know, we can talk about this once we're done with Mephiles,'' he said, pointing at the Dark, who got up. Despite the glare he shoot at them, there was clearly a slight hint of alarm in his gaze, especially since Touka was clearly more than willing to aid the group in the battle rather than be consumed by her depression and trauma. Shadow noticed that, stepping out.

''Care to prove your status as The Ultimate Weapon against the Chaos Surge-boosted Ultimate Lifeform?'' he asked. Mephiles frowned, backing away into the shadows. He knew that without Toshiro's aid, he would have a hard time against Shadow powered up by Chaos Surge.

''This won't be the last time we see each other!''

The group watched him disappear, before collectively sighing in relief. Sonic then put his arms behind his head, adding in a causal tone, ''Well, that was fun.'' He smiled sheepishly when he saw the exasperated look Shadow gave him, turning towards Big and Froggy. ''Thanks for the help, guys!''

''You're welcome,'' Big responded happily, glancing at Touka, who had a smile on her lips, despite her clear look of discomfort.

''I… I suppose there's a lot to explain,'' she started. Shadow raised an eyebrow, surprised to see that she was actually willing to come clean about what had happened, with Touka catching on his non-verbal question. ''I had talked to Big, and I think it would be a good idea for the rest of Team Neos to learn the truth.''

''Are you sure?'' Shadow questioned her. Touka gave a firm nod, with Sonic and Shadow exchanging glances. While Shadow was still uncertain, Sonic just gave him an encouraging grin and a thumbs up.

''I'll call Lucas and the rest of the team, then.''

[...]

''You're already familiar with Mephiles, right? He also has a partner named Toshiro Miwa, and just like Touka, Toshiro is an artificial creation, albeit for a different purpose,'' Shadow explained.

''They're the ones who will destroy the future,'' Silver said in a grim tone, drawing everyone's attention as he approached Shadow. ''The kind of fire powers Mephiles has is identical to that of Ignis Infernalis, and considering how I was sent from the future to the exact moment of the past from which the fire originates, I'm certain that it's him who will be the catalyst for this disaster.''

''Then we will stop at nothing to make sure to prevent that,'' Shadow said in a firm tone. He and Silver were suddenly startled by a blue blur, with Sonic appearing right between them, placing his arms over their shoulders and pulling them closer.

''Shadow's right! Be it past, present or future, nothing can stop us from making the world a better place!'' Sonic said cheerfully, with Silver smiling back at him, while Shadow shoot him a glare, clearly still not liking the idea of being touched.

Links:

#Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Enter The E.G.G.M.A.N. Arc & The Babylon Rogues Arc)

#Sonadow Moments in Sonic Cyber Revolution (The Starfall Arc)

#Sonic Cyber Revolution (Masterlist)

#Sonic Cyber Revolution #Sonic Cyber Revolution Analyzer #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #sonadow

20 notes · View notes

sixhours · 3 days

Text

Meteor

She remembers the space he’d carved around himself, and the moment she realized the distance was too great to cross.

Rating: PG Word count: 1k

Notes: X-Files revival era fic.

Originally posted at ao3 01/19/2016

~*~

She makes her way up the long drive, the old farmhouse looming like a specter from her past. There are no lights in the windows, just a cold, hulking shadow against a darkening sky; an apt metaphor if she thinks about it too much, which she won’t.

“Where are you, Mulder?” Scully whispers to herself. His car is parked next to the porch. It’s evening, too early for sleep.

The air is damp as she leaves the warmth of the car, carrying a folder of papers. Spring has turned the ground to mud beneath her feet, and she, in her most expensive pair of heels, frowns. Her good boots are at the bottom of a box at the back of her closet along with the rest of the things she never unpacked.

The porch creaks in the same places, the screen door still protests on its hinge. She knocks once before trying the handle, finding it open.

“Mulder?”

The house is dusty and silent. She curses under her breath, gooseflesh rising along the back of her neck, wishing she had her holster. Three months on the job after so long away and she’s still not used to carrying.

She’s debating whether to check upstairs or leave the file on the kitchen table when a voice calls her name from outside.

“Scully?”

She steps onto the porch, squinting into the darkness. “Mulder? Is that you?”

“I’m out back,” he calls. “Watch your step.”

She turns on her phone’s flashlight and makes her way to the back yard. A shadow sits on the frame of the old pickup they haven’t used in years.

“I’d have left the porch light on if I’d known you were coming,” it says.

She points the phone in that direction, eliciting a wince from her partner as the beam hits his eyes.

“Ow, Scully.”

“Sorry,” she mutters, shutting off the light. “What are you doing out here, Mulder?”

There’s the distinct sound of liquid sloshing, the kiss of a bottle at his lips.

“Just sittin’ and thinkin’.”

“In the dark? It’s chilly,” she says, rubbing her shoulders for emphasis.

His face resolves as her eyes slowly adjust. He’s sitting on the tailgate, legs dangling off the end, a beer nestled between his thighs.

“I thought you’d be working.”

“Guy can’t take a break once in a while?”

She smirks. “Who are you and what have you done with my partner?”

“Hah-hah, funny. Have a seat, Scully.”

She does after a pause, easing herself onto the tailgate to join him.

“This’ll warm you up,” he says, offering her a beer.

“How many of these have you had?” she asks, accepting the bottle with a raised eyebrow.

“Just the one, doc. Don’t worry,” he says. “It’s not that kind of party.”

The cap twists off; the taste of malt fizzes on her tongue, goes down smooth.

“I take it you’re here for business and not pleasure,” he says, nodding to the folder in her lap.

“Mm. It’s the autopsy results for Lisa Baylor. Scrapings from her fingernails revealed traces of skin; they’re processing the DNA and I asked the lab to run it through NICS. We’ll have the full results in the morning, but I thought you’d want to get an early start.”

“You ever heard of email, Scully?”

“You mean the thing that keeps you tethered to your computer at all hours? Yeah, I’ve heard of it,” she mutters.

He offers a wry smile. “You didn’t have to drive all the way out here for that.”

“Maybe I wanted to talk about the case in person.”

His voice grows soft. “You don’t need an excuse to visit, you know. You always have a place here.”

“I wasn’t looking for an excuse.”

“Checking up on me, huh?”

“Mulder,” she sighs. “Don’t start.”

A cricket chirps in the grass at their feet, filling the stillness that hovers like a black mist. She remembers the space he’d carved around himself, and the moment she realized the distance was too great to cross.

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” he says finally, nudging her shoulder in apology. “Been a rough year. Sometimes I forget we’re on the same side now.”

“I’ve always been on your side, Mulder,” she murmurs, feeling their history like a lead weight in her chest. “I’ve only ever wanted what was best for you.”

“I know,” he nods, then holds out his bottle. “Truce?”

“Truce,” she agrees, letting the glass clink softly. For a moment, the silence is comfortable, familiar, and she closes her eyes.

When she opens them, she’s looking at his profile in the dusky light. With his beard shaved and his hair trimmed, she can almost see the man she met twenty odd years ago. Without thinking, she reaches out to touch his cheek, the stubble rough against her fingers.

He looks over, bemused, and she pulls her hand away, still feeling the ghost of his skin against her palm.

“You clean up good, G-man,” she says.

He chuckles, his gaze turned upward. “Hey, it’s starting.”

He points to the sky and her eyes follow, trying to see what he sees. A pinprick of light flicks across the sky, followed by another, and then another; the beginnings of a meteor shower.

Mulder reaches behind them and pulls out two rolled sleeping bags, settling back against one in the bed of the truck. She doesn’t ask why he brought two instead of one, for the same reason she knows the extra beer in her hand was never intended for him.

She pulls the rolled blanket behind her and lies back to watch the show. Her eyes flit from one corner of the heavens to the other as more of the blue-white streaks make their way across the night, and she marvels at how the stars can still stun her with their beauty, how the universe in all its endless mystery can be so breathtaking, even after bringing such grief.

His voice is rich and vulnerable, spoken to the open air. “It wasn’t all bad, was it, Scully?”

She doesn’t have to think. Her response is as immediate and as involuntary as a heartbeat. “No…it wasn’t.”

She finds his hand without trying and listens to the sound of their mingled breathing as the sky falls around them.

cc @today-in-fic

#the x-files #mulder x scully #fanfic #x-files revival

29 notes · View notes

chainzzzzsaw · 2 days

Text

help i wrote something but its so bad and makes no sense i need someone to read it and help me 💀💀💀

(its soukoku angst:3)

(also tw for suicide)

. . .

He was having a panic attack, he couldn't breathe. He felt like he was drowning in the air that was far too humid to ever be comfortable in. His head was buried between his knees as he took harsh breaths through his nose and out through his mouth. In and out. He repeated to himself silently in his head. As he began hyperventilating, he felt cold water droplets fall down on his head, soaking his hair and the nature around him.

He was sitting in the grove of a dying tree in a place where only he and Chuuya knew about. They had gone here together years ago before Dazai had left the Port Mafia. He hasn’t been here in 4 years, so why was he here now?

He heard a crunch of dead leaves down the path he had come down. His eyes filled up with his own water droplets as he heard his name being called by the one boy he truly felt something for. “Dazai..?” It sounded muffled, like he was listening through a low quality video. He wasn't actually there. He felt dissociative. He wasn't there, but he was, and this was happening. He heard his name again, “Dazai!” followed by a tap on the shoulder. He couldn’t answer. Dazai lifted his head up and stared into Chuuya’s cold azure eyes. The longer he stared, the longer he felt his eyes and heart betray himself.

His heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest. It had been 4 whole years since he had last seen Chuuya, 4 whole years of his love stored inside him, did Chuuya feel the same about Dazai all this time? Why was Chuuya here now?

These were the thoughts that dashed from the left side of Dazai’s brain to the right side.

The tears that had been daring to leak out of Dazai’s eyes, had already started to come out, yet he didn't realize. The water drained out of his eyes, competing in a race to the end of Dazai’s face. Chuuya pulled Dazai up off the, now wet, dirt and said something. He didn't seem to hear it though. The rain began spilling over both of their faces now, mingling with Dazai’s tears that were still flowing.

As he felt himself slowly come back to reality, he realized Chuuya’s arm was holding his wrist, right on his bandages. He looked down, and Chuuya dropped it. “Why are you here? Why right now?” Dazai said with a whine, his voice feeling shaky, which was something that never happened to Dazai. “I always come here. I always come here and I wait for the day that you come back.” Chuuya responded almost as if he was breathless.

He felt every memory he had with Chuuya come directly back to him, stabbing him in the heart relentlessly. “Huh…” It almost came out in a whisper. Did Chuuya want Dazai to come back?

“Dazai. I- I can't just pretend like I haven't been thinking about you every day since you left… I was in love with you. That isn't something that just goes away with time.” Chuuya rambled on, but Dazai just stood there. He couldn't process what Chuuya was saying when he was talking so fast, he was going over every word in his head, but he was stuck on that word he heard.

Love.

I was in love with you.

Chuuya’s words replayed in his mind like a horrible song you can't get out of your head. It flew into his ear, and then through his mind, stabbing into his heart, and back out again, over and over.

He loved Chuuya too, he just couldn't say it. The words wouldn't come out of his mouth. Like an answer you know but you just can’t remember.

“Me? Why me? I’m not good.” Dazai didn’t even know what he was saying, better yet, he didn’t even know he was talking.

“Because you're Dazai.”

Dazai’s hands slowly brought themselves to the sides of Chuuya’s face. Chuuya flinched at the touch. He hesitated to speak, he couldn’t show vulnerability, even with Chuuya. What was wrong with Dazai? Couldn’t he let go of his pride for one second and just say that he loved him back?

Chuuya’s hands now rested upon Dazai’s, which were lazily placed on his face. He didn’t know when either of them started to lean in, but they did, and their lips touched briefly. Dazai felt his tears roll down his face even as they shared a kiss. They both pulled away from each other, wide eyed, and Dazai dropped his hands.

“…Woah.” Chuuya whispered. “Um… Uh… I’m sorry.” Dazai had guilt lingering in his voice. They hadn't even talked about how they felt for each other and here they were, kissing, after not seeing each other for 4 years?!

Dazai had a gut feeling that this wouldn’t go how he wanted it to. He wanted them to be together, stuck like glue as they once were years ago. But he knew that wouldn’t happen, not after everything he’s done, not with his current mental state.

The silence was unbearable, it consumed them both. Eating all the words they wanted to say until there was nothing left at all.

Dazai is scared to love Chuuya, he knows he brings pain to all of those around him. The misfortune and pain he has following him like a cloud is not something he wishes to push onto the one person he has learned to love. He doesn’t wish to burden him with the pressure of his feelings.

“I'm sorry…”

And with that, Dazai quickly pushed past him and jogged down the path and back to his apartment. Chuuya chased after him, not knowing what else to do, but he lost him along the way. He at least knew where Dazai lived because, as one does, he did some light stalking over the years they were apart.

. . .

Dazai had finally made it home after 10 long minutes of looking behind him to see if Chuuya had followed. Spoiler, he hadn’t. Dazai didn’t know if he was happy or disappointed about that, but right now it didn't matter to him.

His thoughts progressively got worse as he unlocked the door, stepping in quickly and dragging himself to his room. He bent down to his drawer, he felt his legs burn.

His fingers rummaged through the random items he had thrown in it, obviously searching for something. He pulled out his blade, sighing deeply, and then his eyes met the bottle of Prozac laying on the corner of his dresser, quickly snatching it up.

He didnt know which to use, but if he couldn’t choose between them, why not just use both?

And so he did. Dazai grasped both the blade and the pills, preparing himself for yet another suicide attempt. It wasn’t a foreign concept to him, as he constantly planned new methods to end his life and courageously attempted them. Dazai held a desperate hope, a wish, that one day, one of his attempts would succeed, granting him freedom from the burdensome chains of existence. He knew his attempts were always futile, yet he clung to a glimmer of hope, praying that this time, just maybe, it would be different.

He picked up the bottle of prozac and held it in his left hand, the blade in his right. His thoughts were flooding his mind and battling with each other. He felt so much regret filling his heart of all the things he didn’t do with Chuuya, the things he couldn’t do.

Dazai flung the blade and the bottle of pills onto his bed before making his way to the kitchen. He retrieved a glass and filled it to the brim with tap water. Returning to his bedroom, he carelessly dropped the cup onto his dresser. With a hesitant hand, he opened the bottle of Prozac, pouring an excess of pills into his palm. He hesitated, his hand hovering near his mouth, reluctant to ingest them.

Dazai wanted to die, he always has, it's what he's known for. So why was he hesitating? Was it because of Chuuya?

Dazai liked being in control, he hated that his mind was a slave to his heart.

He tried his best to ignore his thoughts and dropped the handful of pills into his mouth and swallowed them quickly, using the water as a chaser to get them down his throat.

He was a bit more dizzy than he had been before. He picked up the blade and held it vertically on his wrist. He took a deep breath and pressed down hard into his wrist, wincing as he dragged the blade down his forearm. He repeated the same action on his other arm, blood was now dripping down onto the floor in puddles.

He sat down on the floor with his back against his bed, using the rest of the energy he had left to cut anywhere else that would contribute to a successful attempt because he knew well that there was always a way to survive any suicide attempt.

His neck?

Dazai’s neck was leaking like a waterfall, spilling all over his shirt. He felt himself drifting in and out of consciousness. His eyes felt heavy. He knew this would be the attempt that brought him to that oh so peaceful deep sleep that is death.

What Dazai didn’t know is that Chuuya was on his way right now, passing through numerous red lights just to get to him. The first thing that Chuuya would see when he came into Dazai’s room, is Dazai’s body being drained of the life that was left inside of him. That thought alone gave his heart a squeeze.

He thinks he heard banging at his front door, maybe he's just delirious. Was Dazai dissociating again? The banging got even louder and then it stopped and a louder bang came shortly after with a crash following. The door was knocked down, Ha, it’s Chuuya.

Dazai heard his name being called along with heavy footsteps, but there was nothing he could do to answer. His skin was as pale as paper and his clothes were drenched in his own blood.

Chuuya kicked into Dazai’s room and saw his body, bleeding out. Dazai felt himself smile.

“I- wh — Dazai-” He fumbled on his words. Chuuya felt like he couldn’t move, he felt stuck. He was tearing up, his eyes now cloudy. He forced his body to move and brought his hands around Dazai.

Chuuya looked into Dazai’s empty brown eyes and felt sick, his hands trembling. Their eyes locked and Dazai’s smile immediately faded and his face turned into something akin to frantic.

Dazai had just realized that maybe he didn’t want to die. At least, not now.

Something about looking into eyes that were burning with life while he was about to run out of his own did something to him. Dazai felt his body slowly slipping away with each faint breath he tried to take in. Water began piling up on his lash line once again.

His lungs were begging for air and he felt lightheaded. Dazai was going to die now. He had slit his wrists, neck, and took way more prozac than any doctor would ever recommend.

Chuuya’s hands were holding onto Dazai, he was saying something but Dazai couldn’t hear it. A black veil began clouding over his vision and Dazai knew what that meant. He wanted to open his eyes, stop dying for a second so he could tell Chuuya what he’s been wanting to say since the day they met.

The last thing he heard was muffled yelling and a phone ringing.

. . .

Dazai’s eyes finally opened, but he wasn’t with Chuuya and he wasn’t in a hospital. He had finally succeeded at something, but death was something he no longer craved.

Whenever Dazai was with Chuuya, all his thoughts of suicide seemed to float away. When Dazai was with Chuuya, he didn’t have to worry about anything. When Dazai was with Chuuya, he wanted to try living. Chuuya was the lightbulb in Dazai’s dark room.

Dazai's life had always seemed bleak in Chuuya's absence. The fleeting moments of genuine happiness he experienced were intertwined with memories of Oda and Chuuya. With Oda gone and now Dazai's own passing, those moments felt even more distant.

Dazai now found himself overwhelmed by his emotions, their intensity hitting him like crashing waves. These waves, reminiscent of water, stirred memories of the cold blue hue of Chuuya's eyes.

help idk if im done with this but idk what to add.. i just hate this but i need input from others it feels so rushed to me

17 notes · View notes

miniscule-meow · 2 days

Text

Isabell and the Lads CH 2: The Healing Process (2.6)

Masterpost Wordcount: ~1.7k First Part | Last Part | Next Part (eventually)

---

A rhythmic tapping rouses her from her sleep.

Her eyes peel open to find a familiar darkness surrounding her. She could almost convince herself she is back home and that she isn’t living out her biggest nightmare. Almost.

“Isabell?” Zeke’s voice, though gentle, shatters the dream of her being back in the walls, where she belongs. “Are you up?”

“Yeah, I’m up,” she calls out groggily. She must have been in a pretty deep sleep if his footsteps didn’t wake her up before he got to her, she doesn't like the thought of a human being able to sneak up on her.

Isabell sighs, raising her arms in an attempt to stretch, and she’s met with aching ribs and sharply protesting limbs. So that’s how it’s gonna be. As gently as possible, she maneuvers herself into a sitting position, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. She has to pause here, the pain in her body has officially caught up with her. She thought there was a chance she could sleep all of this off, but as it stands right now, everything just feels worse. She takes another breath, deep enough for her ribs to flare their complaints. She’s been awake for maybe thirty seconds and she already wants to cry.

Instead, she grits her teeth and stands out of the bed, testing her leg. She doesn’t need to put much weight on it to know that it is not happy. She’ll need to stay off of it as much as possible if she ever wants a chance to get out of here.

Her shelf is still nice and dim, with only a bit of light slipping in around the edges of the curtain. So, the main lights must be on out there. Turning her attention to the curtain wall, she can see Zeke’s monolithic shadow in front of her.

“I’m coming,” she says, hoping he’ll just wait for her. She doesn’t want to see his massive fingers pull back the barrier separating them.

She’s trying not to think about it, but all of this is truly only the illusion of safety. At any point the human could decide that he’s tired of waiting, that he’s tired of her. Every single moment she’s putting so much trust in him. Trust that he’ll be patient, trust that he’ll be kind, trust that he’ll be gentle. It’s trust that she simply does not have, but she has no choice.

She hobbles her way out to the open part of the shelf, clinging to the wall as much as possible in an attempt to avoid putting too much weight on her leg. She’s really going to have to do something about that.

She blinks, her eyes adjusting to the full light of the room. Her breathing catches, seeing Zeke’s massive form kneeling in front of her, his eyes trained on her. Even though she’s been interacting with these humans, seeing them, especially for the first time again, sparks an intrinsic fear inside of her.

Don’t get caught. You’ve already been caught. They can see you. Run. Hide. Escape.

She shoves the thoughts aside. This is her situation. She can’t fix it right now. The humans are helping her.

The rational thought quells her fear meager amounts at best.

“Good morning,” Zeke says, his eyes scanning over her. “How are you feeling today?”

“I’ve been better,” she says, leaning heavily against the wall. “Um, thank you, by the way. For… setting this up for me.” She gestures over to her ‘room’ behind the curtains.

“Of course. I’m glad we could find something that worked for you,” Zeke responds with a small smile gracing his features. “I was going to make some breakfast. Do you want to come out to the living room?”

Does she want to? Does she want to willingly put herself in the palm of his hand? No. Not really. Does she agree anyway, of course. That’s what the human wants, right? At this point, it’s more dangerous to disappoint him.

She nods numbly, and Zeke’s hand rests on the shelf in front of her. She feels as though she’s watching her own actions from behind her eyes, as if she were instead watching a screen. The only way her mind can rationalize a willing interaction with this human is to just disconnect herself completely.

Sure, the humans have been nice so far. But every single moment she spends with them she has to fight every one of her instincts. Her brain’s wiring just won’t stop telling her that she’s in extreme danger. Don’t get caught, don’t get caught don’t get- she’s already been caught. She needs to play by a different set of rules now. But it’s been a lifetime of fear, well deserved fear. One or two reasonable conversations with a human isn’t going to magically undo all of that.

She takes a hesitant step forward, still pushing against the wall of the shelf for support, when the hand in front of her shifts. You were taking to long. He’s run out of patience. She jolts, expecting the hand to lurch forward and snatch her up in an unforgiving fist. Instead, the massive fingers curl in on themselves, and the hand moves in the opposite direction. She looks up, finally connecting the hand to the human, and meeting Zeke’s gaze curiously.

“Sorry. I just- You know that you can say no to me, right?” His brow furrows, his green eyes taking her in. When she doesn’t respond, he continues, “I don’t want you to say yes just because you feel like you can’t say no. That isn’t… that’s not consent. I mean,” he looks away, searching elsewhere for the right words to say, “yeah, before neither of us had much of a choice about anything. It was an emergency situation, and I’m really sorry about all of that. But now you have your own space here and- I’m rambling,” he shakes his head, looking back to her, “I don’t want you to say yes to me just because that’s what you think I want. And I really don’t want you to say yes to me because you’re afraid to say no. That’s… that makes me,” he hesitates, “that makes me feel really gross,” he admits, shaking his head once more.

She hadn't considered his feelings in all of this.

Her being afraid of him makes him feel... gross? How is that even possible. She'd always been under the impression that humans relished in the fear they caused. It never occurred to her that he might be just as uncomfortable interacting with her as she is with him.

Is it possible that she's been so wrapped up in her own feelings that she's completely missed the nuance of emotions from this impossibly large being? It is just easier for her to write off everything from them as fearmongering and manipulation so she doesn't have to consider that they aren't really all that different after all?

But still, this fear that is so deeply interwoven into her being. She's had horrific run-ins with humans. She's seen their cruelty, the inflated ego of having something smaller than them that they can dominate. She's never seen a human like Zeke. Kneeling down on her level, going out of his way to help her feel comfortable, telling her how he feels? This doesn't fit in the box of humans are scary and irrational beings that she has sequestered in her mind. This simply makes no sense to her.

Even if, and it's a big if, she were to take this human at face value, and she were to let herself trust him, it's not like she can just turn her fear off with the flick of a switch. Maybe she doesn't want to be afraid anymore. But can she really turn her back on the one thing that has kept her alive all this time?

She stays hidden because she's afraid of getting caught.

She goes out borrowing because she's afraid of starving to death.

Everything she's needed to do in life, she's done because of fear. Every choice she's made has been based on what outcome she's more or less afraid of.

Now to just say, 'no, fear, I don't need you anymore.' It feels impossible.

She feels herself slipping into a circle of thought. Be afraid, but don't be afraid, but you should be afraid, but you shouldn't be afraid, but you've always been afraid, but you don't have to be afraid anymore.

She will have to try to unpack this later.

Zeke continues, “you can say no, you can obviously also say yes. It’s- I mean, that’s why I’m asking. I want to know what you want. Okay? Do you want to go out to the living room, or would you rather stay here. It’s up to you.”

She looks up at him cautiously. What does she want? She tries to do the mental gymnastics required to figure out what he wants her to want. This has to be some kind of trick, right? What does she want? A human shouldn’t be concerned about that. She fits in the palm of his hand, and he cares about what she wants? Here she is again, trying to fit Zeke into a box of what she understands humans to be, and failing miserably.

“Um, I want… um, N-no. No, I’d actually like to stay… here,” she feels as wound up as a spring, her shoulders tense rigidly. I just told a human no. She looks up at him wide-eyed, terrified she’s made the wrong choice.

Zeke just nods indifferently. It doesn’t seem like he’s upset or disappointed at all. If anything it looks like he relaxes a little bit. “Alright,” he says standing. “I’ll bring you some breakfast soon, okay?”

“Pancakes?” She asks, remembering the warm fluffy clouds he made for her yesterday.

“Yeah, I can make that happen,” he responds. She can’t see his face, but he sounds amused. He could even be smiling, a rarity from him.

With that, his footsteps retreat off into the main part of the apartment. She takes this time to drag herself back into her room. Zeke had been kind enough to put a little electric candle in the middle of the room for her. She flips the switch and the warm light flickers gently in the space. Off to the side, he had left her a bundle of craft supplies. By the time he comes back with pancakes for her, she’s crafted herself a crutch. So, even though she’s still hobbling around, she’s at least doing it with some proficiency now.

#g/t #g/t writing #g/t stories #my writing #isabell and the lads #i know yall probably want me to update literally any other story but this is where the ideas are right now #featured: zeke saying consent is key #and isabell fighting with her fears #hopefully the pay off for all this slow burn stuff will be worth it lmao

16 notes · View notes

karuvapatta · 2 days

Text

Here comes another part of the Untitled Jonelias Magic AU, enjoy!

Once again, huge thanks to @ceaseless-bitcher, the rest of the Discord server, and the tumblr folk for the likes and reblogs and tags. You're the best! <3

***

Whoever was in charge of the archive ought to be persecuted for his crimes. It was a tiny, windowless room, stacked from floor to ceiling with unlabelled boxes and stacks of loose papers. After three hours of digging for a single report, Jon was about ready to commit an act of unspeakable violence.

He returned to the laboratory, fuming. Other researchers and lab techs took one look at his face and mostly shuffled out of the way as he made his way back to the work station and slammed the papers down, readying himself for the long, tedious process of comparing several columns of numbers to check for trends and discrepancies. He would still need to run them by Sasha later to do some proper statistical analysis, but at least he could have some basis to work on…

“Um… Sims?”

“What is it?” Jon snapped.

The unfortunate technician took a hasty step back. “Master Bouchard is looking for you.”

“So? He could have sent a message,” Jon said.

Bouchard did not care about the state of the archive room, that much was apparent. It was disgraceful, that something like this was even allowed—

“Um—”

“What?”

All of a sudden, Jon realized that he was being watched. The people around him were giving him odd looks; some were exchanging whispered comments. And it wasn’t that hard to guess what they thought about him, and what they were saying behind his back. Some were even openly questioning his relationship with Master Bouchard, and what might have prompted the man to take on someone like Jon to be his apprentice. Jon wasn’t doing himself any favours by openly disrespecting his master’s wishes.

What if Bouchard listened to the gossip? What if he realized he had made a mistake, that he was wasting his time, that—

Jon shook his head. “Right,” he said. “I will go see him now.”

Each step he took felt awkward, now that he knew he was being stared at. Most days he could ignore it and focus on the work in front of him, but now and again it would catch him unawares. It wasn’t just his own reputation at stake; not anymore.

Bouchard would be in his office at this hour. The way was familiar by now. Rosie waved him through with a polite smile, and Jon offered her a curt nod before letting himself into the room.

“Master,” he said. “You wanted to see me?”

Bouchard wasn’t at his desk; that was unusual. But there was a sitting area in the corner where he occasionally conducted meetings. He was there now, lounging in an armchair and engrossed in a book. Jon didn’t get a chance to read the title before he shut the covers and put it away.

At his invitation, Jon took the opposite seat. There was a pot of freshly brewed tea and two cups on the table between them; Jon grabbed it hastily and poured the tea. He glanced at his master’s face and stirred a spoonful of sugar into his cup.

Bouchard took a sip of tea and exhaled with obvious pleasure; Jon tried to hide his smile. But his patience was running out quickly. Surely Bouchard had a better reason for summoning him.

Apparently his restlessness was obvious. Bouchard sighed and set down his cup.

“Enough pleasantries, Mr Sims,” he said.

“You haven’t said anything yet, Master,” Jon said.

“And yet you’re already bored,” Bouchard said, the corner of his lip twitching. “I take it the lab requires your constant supervision?”

“It requires some supervision,” Jon said, and immediately felt the urge to bite off his own tongue. It wasn’t his place to criticize the way Master Bouchard managed his department. “I didn’t mean—”

“Yes, you did,” Bouchard said. “And do not lie to me, please. I much prefer impertinence to dishonesty.”

“That is a relief,” Jon said. “I’m a notoriously bad liar.”

Bouchard chuckled lightly. It accentuated the lines on his face, particularly around his pale eyes, and the upturned curve of his mouth. And it wasn’t really fair how much that look suited him.

“Well,” Jon cleared his throat, and adjusted the collar of his shirt. “Is there anything you wanted to discuss with me?”

“Indeed there is,” Bouchard said. “Have you made any progress with your training?”

All of a sudden Jon realized how relaxed he had felt up until this moment. But now his posture stiffened, and a weight pressed down on his chest.

“No,” he said. “I have not and you know it.”

Was it disappointment, then, in Bouchard’s solemn expression? It had to be. He had every reason to be disappointed with Jon. Impertinence might have been acceptable but incompetence was decidedly not. And Jon really wasn’t proving himself in that regard, was he?

“And why do you think that is?” Bouchard asked.

“I don’t know,” Jon snapped, frustration boiling over. “I am trying, I really am. I just—I don’t know what it is I’m doing wrong.”

He rubbed his chin and covered his mouth with a hand, eyes fliting around the room, trying to focus on something, anything that wasn’t Bouchard’s knowing gaze.

A long, heavy silence followed. His master was clearly waiting for Jon to come up with a decent excuse, or at least a reasonable explanation for the numerous failures; for all the wasted hours and sleepless nights. But it ought to have been clear by now that Jon had nothing to offer. So what was he still waiting for?

“Jon,” Bouchard said, after Jon remained stubbornly quiet. And that—he almost never addressed Jon by his name. It was improper, it implied a level of familiarity that they decidedly did not share; Jon flinched in his seat. “If I may offer a suggestion?”

That startled a laugh out of Jon, bitter and somewhat unpleasant. Now, after all this time, Bouchard wanted to help? “Of course,” he said.

“Will you do as I say?”

“I—” Jon hesitated, but it did not last long. He was past the point of desperation – or, come to think of it, pride. “Yes. I will.”

“Good,” Bouchard nodded. “Then take off the bracelet.”

“The—what?”

“You heard me.”

“I did hear you,” Jon said, incredulous. Was Bouchard toying with him, again? “I just—I can’t do that, Master. You know I can’t.”

“Why not?”

The bracelet had been his near-constant companion for the past twenty years; Jon touched it now, seeking reassurance from its presence. He felt the familiar intricate pattern, the faint pulsating rhythm of it, the subtle way it shifted and reacted to his touch. And—how could he explain it? Why would he need to? It was embarrassing enough that he had to wear it at all, and now Bouchard was expecting him to admit to this—this weakness?

“Because I can’t control my magic without it,” Jon snapped.

Bouchard looked as if he was waiting for something. It seemed like he would be willing to wait a long time for—what, exactly? For Jon to have a miraculous breakthrough—

--wait.

“I—I can’t control my magic,” Jon repeated, slow and incredulous. “Really? That’s it?” He turned towards Bouchard, who was watching him intently. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I did,” Bouchard said. “You didn’t listen.”

“I did listen! I just didn’t understand—” Jon’s voice drifts off. His hand is wrapped loosely around his wrist, covering the bracelet. “And now you want me to take it off?”

“Yes,” Bouchard said. “You have been relying on it for, how long now? Several years?”

“Twenty,” Jon said flatly.

At that, Bouchard went still. He stared at Jon with wide eyes, as if he was seeing him for the first time. It occurred to Jon that it was the only time so far he had seen the man genuinely surprised.

“I’m sorry—twenty years?” Bouchard said. “Oh, Jon… what happened?”

“Nothing happened,” Jon said. He was feeling slightly nauseous. His tea had cooled down in the meantime but it was still refreshingly bitter; he took a long gulp to settle his stomach. “How would taking it off now possibly help me?”

“You need to get used to relying on yourself again,” Bouchard said after a moment. “Your own willpower, your own self-control. It is not something that can be exercised for half an hour twice a week.”

“Oh, and it’s that easy?” Jon snapped.

“No one said anything about easy.”

Jon set down his half-empty cup with too much force. Lukewarm tea sloshed inside and spilled partially onto the saucer beneath.

“Thank you for the advice, Master,” he said stiffly, pushing himself upwards. “Is there anything else you wanted to discuss?”

Bouchard measured him with a cool gaze, eyebrows pinched together. Perhaps Jon had gone too far this time – he expected the man to lash out, to discipline him, or just end his apprenticeship altogether. But Bouchard merely sighed, and shook his head.

“No, that is all. You may go.”

Off Jon went, and tried to tell himself that what he felt was relief, and not disappointment.

#jonelias #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #elias bouchard

15 notes · View notes