#but he CANNOT let Eleanor happen | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thranduilland · 11 months

Note

Angst hours, leggooooooo!!! (ノ◎A◎)ノ~☆

❛ i’m sorry, have we met? ❜

This one got away from me lolol Will add to Ao3 later...when I am properly awake for it lololol

“Are you sure?” John Constantine asks, around the cigarette between his lips, the smoke from it wafting up towards the ceiling. Hob hesitates, thinks of his stranger, of the meetings they’ve had through the centuries, thinks of the time he’s spent trying to gain his stranger’s favour. He thinks of all the time, the effort, the money he’s put into building the New Inn for him, when there’s no guarantee at all that his stranger will ever return. He thinks of all the years he spent wallowing in grief and spite and rage following the deaths of his Robyn, Eleanor, and the babe that never got to breathe. He knows this’ll consume him, destroy him if he lets it. So, he won’t let it.

“I’m sure. Do it. Take it away,” Hob says, letting his eyes flicker shut.

Dream finds the New Inn on accident. He’d gone to the ruins of the White Horse and stared at them for a very long time, feeling bereft. His realm had crumbled in his absence, and the White Horse had, too. If the Dreaming crumbling was a reflection of his own diminished and, reluctant as he is to admit it, damaged self, then what is the crumbling of the White Horse a reflection of? But he knows the answer to that question already.

It's as he’s aimlessly wandering the streets of London that he comes across the New Inn. He stops out front of it, staring as he feels the thrumming of it. The New Inn… it is a temple, one that was dedicated to him, but that dedication is… faltering. It’s slipping, fading away into nothingness. It is a sign that the High Priest has turned away from him and he cannot blame them, whoever they may be. When would he have been active in their life, trapped in the cage as he had been?

It is curiosity that makes him go inside. Curiosity that makes him look around the quaint little bar, though, he supposes at this hour the more correct term would be ‘café’. It is during this quick look that he spots Hob, seated at a table along the wall. Dream can’t help the rush of joy he feels as he approaches.

“Hello, Hob,” he says as he stands before the table, but when Hob looks up at him there is no recognition in his eyes at all, it douses the flame inside of Dream, makes his heart curl in on itself. Something is wrong.

“I’m sorry, have we met?” Hob asks, his brows furrowing, Dream pulls the chair in front of him out with a shaking hand as he sinks into it on equally shaking legs.

“You do not remember me?” Dream asks, aware of how his voice shakes. “After all of the centuries?” he whispers, Hob’s eyes widening, before something like understanding and regret form in them.

“Yeah, uhm, I-I sort of paid a very handsome amount of money for someone to remove a lot of my memories. Not sure exactly what I forgot, obviously, but maybe you got caught up in that?” Hob says, appraising him. Dream’s breath hitches, Hob had… he’d paid someone to remove memories of him? “Sorry? It had to happen eventually; you know? Human brain isn’t supposed to contain all the memories I have. Would be nice if I remembered how I became immortal, though, think that got lost in the removal as well,” Hob says, shrugging his shoulders. “Either way, very lovely to meet you again. What should I call you?” Hob asks, smiling politely at him, Dream knows Hob is humouring him and that should strike at his pride, but all it does is hurt.

“Dream,” he answers after a moment’s hesitation. “My name, my truest name in your language, is Dream of the Endless.”

“Well, then, Dream of the Endless. Welcome to the New Inn,” Hob says, his eyes shining. “How did we know each other before?”

“My sister granted you immortality,” he answers, deciding that this is a second chance, he has been granted a miracle. The opportunity to fix what he broke; he will not waste it. He will embrace it. “It was a bet, between her and I, that you would be begging for death within a century. I lost.”

“Seems like an odd bet to be making,” Hob says, leaning back in his chair, surprised. “Who is your sister?”

“Death,” Dream answers, a small smile forming as Hob chokes on his spit. “You had been bragging that you weren’t going to die. You called my sister stupid. It’s what caught our attention. I asked her what sort of fool would want to live forever and she told me that I could find out. She offered to grant your wish.”

“And that’s when you told her I’d be begging for her within a century. I get it. So, I won, obviously?”

“Yes. I approached you, to tell you we’d meet there, in the White Horse tavern, in a hundred years to see if you still wished to live. You did. We met there every hundred years since, except-“ he pauses, cutting himself off and looking away. “We fought, at the 1889 meeting. You said something that I wasn’t ready to accept, and I stormed out. You thought we’d fix things at the 1989 meeting, but I-“ Dream stops, hesitates. “I was unable to make it.”

“Oh, would you have, though? If you could have?” Hob asks, Dream hums, inclining his head.

“Yes,” he answers, easily. Easier than he thinks he has the right to, but it’s true. He would have been there if he could have been there. “I would say that I am sorry, but…”

“But I do not remember what you’re sorry for, I get it,” Hob answers, with a nod. “That’s alright. For what it is worth, I forgive you. Let’s start over, if you’d like?” Hob offers, holding out his hand for Dream, who doesn’t hesitate in taking it.

“I would like that very much,” Dream agrees with a smile.

Dream visits with Hob far more frequently than he ever visited with him before. He probably shouldn’t spend as much time in the Waking as he does, but he… he doesn’t want to ruin this. Hob likes him. Hob talks to him. Hob… he lights up when he sees Dream walk through the door at the New Inn, or when he opens his apartment door to find Dream standing there. Hob doesn’t begrudge his presence, doesn’t ask him for favours, doesn’t yell at him. Hob is… he’s just happy that Dream is there and… it makes Dream’s heart swell. He can’t help the smiles that Hob manages to pull from him as easily as breathing. Dream… he’s not really sure what to do with that. So, he indulges it.

Over the months, the power of the New Inn starts to grow, signifying the High Priest has recovered their faith in Dream. It takes Dream far too long to realize that Hob is the High Priest. That it was Hob who built and dedicated the New Inn for him. That it was Hob who had so much faith in him when he had done so, but somewhere between establishing the New Inn and their reunion, that faith had waned. Somewhere between those two events, Hob had cast away his memories of Dream, and with them went any remnant of faith.

The thought of that still feels like a lance through Dream’s heart, but the wound is lessened by the knowledge that Hob is letting Dream prove himself. That Hob is letting himself place enough faith in Dream that the temple can recognize it and heal from the damage done.

“Dream?” Hob asks one day, a year after the reunion, a year after Hob has let Dream work for his friendship, though, if Dream were anyone else he’s sure they wouldn’t have said it was any kind of effort. The pair of them are lying on the roof of the New Inn, basking in the rare sunny day, as Hob convinces Dream of the shapes he sees in the clouds.

“Yes, Hob?” he asks, expecting Hob to point out another dragon, or horse, or other thing of note. But Hob doesn’t, instead, he is silent for a very long moment and Dream rolls onto his side to frown at his friend. “Hob?”

“Will you… will you show me our meetings in my dream?” Hob queries, uncertain as he, too, rolls onto his side to catch Dream’s gaze.

“Our meetings?” Dream asks confused, unable to think why Hob would hesitate over that. “If you wish to have dreams of our meetings, I can do that for you, I suppose,” he answers, sure he doesn’t keep any of his confusion out of his voice.

“No, Dream. I mean… our meetings,” he says, raising an eyebrow, Dream’s heart spasms, a weight settling in his stomach as he thinks he’s figured out what Hob is actually asking.

“You mean the meetings from… from before?” he asks, suddenly feeling queasy. “Hob, I-“ he stops, rolls back onto his back to look up at the blue sky above as he tries to gather himself.

“Please? I… I will never have memories of those meetings again, beyond what you can show me in my dreams. I-I just… I want to know why I took the memories away.”

“You will not think well of me,” Dream says, resigning himself to the loss of Hob’s friendship. There is no way that they will move forward from this. There is no way that Hob will see their past meetings and let his forgiveness stand, not when he will finally know what Dream has done.

“I’m not sure that’s true, Dream,” Hob answers, when Dream turns his head to look at him, he finds his friend frowning at him. “I enjoy your company,” Hob says, frown deepening when Dream cannot hide the way he flinches. “Dream?”

“I will do this for you, Hob Gadling,” he says, turning away before Hob can see the tears in his eyes. “But I will not stay while you dream through our meetings.”

“Why not? I’d like to have you there with me.”

“No. It will be better this way,” Dream answers, shaking his head, reaching up a hand to wipe at his face. “Tonight, you will dream as you have asked. Goodbye, Hob.“

“No! Dream, wai-!“

Dream does not let Hob finish, calling upon his sand to return him to his chambers in the Dreaming. He collapses into his bed and cannot help the sob that wrenches itself from his throat. He shifts into his cat form and curls into a ball and mourns the loss of his most cherished friendship.

He feels it as Hob slips into the Dreaming and calls for him. For the first time since their reunion, Dream does not answer. Instead, from the dubious comfort of his own bed he weaves the dreamscape of the White Horse around Hob. He sets the stage with a care he’s not given to any single person’s dreams in at least a thousand years. Then, once everything is set and their meeting from 1389 has started to play out around Hob, Dream severs his awareness, slumps back down into his bed and cries like someone has torn his heart out of his chest.

For they have, it’s just that he’s done it to himself.

“Morpheus!”

Dream jolts up from an uneasy slumber. He doesn’t often need sleep, not in the way that his charges need it, but every now and again he does find peace and restoration in sleep. Not this time, as Hob’s voice calls in his ears and he suddenly remembers what he has done.

“I call to you, Morpheus. Answer me. Please?”

When he’d given Hob the means to summon him, he’d promised he would always answer if it was within his power to do so. He cannot go back on that promise now, not even if he thinks nothing good will come of answering. So, with a sigh he fixes his appearance, and lets his sand carry him away to the Waking.

“You came!” Hob exclaims, eyes wide with relief as Dream appears before him in the immortal’s living room.

“You called,” Dream answers, suddenly wondering if how he feels is what humans mean when they say that someone feels like they’re walking to their death. He knows this will not be the death of him, but it will not be a pleasant experience all the same and, all the same, he is resigned to it.

“I don’t know what you’re so afraid of, Dream,” Hob says, with a little frown, even as Dream blinks, brow furrowing as he tries to understand. Hob is… not angry? “Look, I’m not going to ask what happened that changed you so greatly from the Dream I saw in 1889 and the Dream that came before me at the New Inn. But you are changed. I can’t say it was… enjoyable, watching that last meeting, but… you said you would have been there in 1989 if you could have been, right?”

“Yes.”

“Right. So, it’s fine. You’re forgiven. Don’t sweat about it.”

“What?” Dream exclaims, eyes wide. “Hob, I-“

“Dream. Friends fight. Hell, lovers fight. Everyone does. Siblings fight. Kids fight with their parents. Everyone fights with the people in their lives at some point, it’s just how things go. I am not… sure exactly what pushed me to have my memories removed, but I can guess.”

“Oh?”

“You saw how I was in 1689. My Eleanor, my Robyn… they’d been gone for decades by then. Decades where I could have picked myself up and put myself back together, but I didn’t. I let my entire existence focus on what I had lost, what I’d never get back. In 1989, you weren’t at the meeting, I couldn’t have known that you’d… been delayed somehow. Given the way we parted in 1889, I think I thought that was the end of things. I could spend the next hundred odd years wallowing and waiting and regretting, or I could find a way to let myself move on,” Hob says, holding Dream’s gaze. “It wasn’t about you, I don’t think. It was about me. It was about… not losing myself again.”

“I understand,” Dream murmurs, because he does. It makes sense. Hob had… he’d done what he could to protect himself with the information that he had. Dream can’t… he really can’t blame Hob for that. It was his own stupid choice to take offence in 1889 and storm off into the rain. It was his own choice to not seek Hob before that disastrous night in 1916. His own poor decisions left Hob with an incomplete picture and misfortune conspired against them in 1989.

“Good. Then, will you stop worrying about this? Please?”

“I don’t understand,” Dream says, shaking his head. This he doesn’t understand, Hob had removed his memories of Dream to ensure his own wellbeing. Now? He continues to claim Dream’s friendship even knowing why he let it go in the first place?

“Dream, god, I love you, but you are an idiot sometimes, duck,” Hob says, as Dream’s mind stutters over the… confession? The insult, and the endearment in quick succession. “I. Forgive. You.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re my friend and I can. Simple,” Hob says, with a bright grin. “Now, come and sit down so we can continue our Star Wars marathon.”

Bewildered, Dream does.

#the sandman #Dream of the Endless #Hob Gadling #Dreamling #angst prompts #ask game #my stuff

79 notes · View notes

hardly-an-escape · 1 year

Text

here’s an angsty little thought I had last night that won’t leave me alone:

picturing a follow up to Dream and Hob’s meeting, during which Dream confesses his romantic feelings for Hob; assuming based on the meeting in 1889 and on Hob’s description of 1989 and on his willingness to wait another 33 years that those feelings must be returned. but instead, Hob admits with a bittersweet smile that he’s seeing someone, actually. and it’s serious.

because personally I just don’t think Hob would never have another serious partner – or even spouse – even after losing Eleanor. (maybe no more kids… but definitely another partner.) That Man is just sooo husband shaped, I get major serial monogamist vibes from him, he likes having someone in bed next to him at night. and hot-smiley-longhaired-professor-in-a-leather-jacket Hob is a CATCH lbr.

so let’s say someone caught him. someone beat Dream to the punch. someone kind and worthy and gentle, someone who’s a catch in their own right.

and it makes Dream so happy, because when you love someone all you really want is for them to be happy, and there’s no denying that Hob looks happy. and it makes Dream so, so sad, because all he can think as Hob describes his partner with such a loving smile is – it could have been him. if only he hadn’t been so frightened, if only he hadn’t been so weak, if only Roderick Burgess hadn’t had that one lucky day and the subsequent century of misery.

and Hob is similarly torn, because he does love this person and it’s a joy to tell his oldest friend about that love, as it is always a joy to tell about one’s love. and his heart twists inside him also, because he’s not not in love with Dream, even now, and now the thought of what might have been is worming into his gut and coiling there uncomfortably.

and so they’re at this emotional standstill, because Dream can tamp his feelings down and lock them away (or try to), but he cannot stay away from Hob, not after finding him again after all this time, so he keeps visiting, torturing himself, not realizing that he is also torturing Hob a little bit every time.

because Hob is happy, is the thing, and even if he wasn’t he refuses to break his partner’s heart just because Dream came back, but every time Dream spends the afternoon, every time they laugh about something that happened hundreds of years ago, every time he sees Dream catch himself smiling a little too broadly and folding it away, Hob’s own heart breaks just a little bit more with a longing he won’t allow himself.

#I realize Hob’s partner is a bit of a blank slate here but I’m not much for making. OCs and I haven’t really thought about how they would #react to this situation and what their observations and opinions might be. I think they would want Hob to be happy obviously but also they #definitely would not totally understand the dynamic between Hob and Dream. I think they probably don’t know about Hob’s immortality? but #maybe they do? that would add an interesting wrinkle for sure #my writing #dreamling #gadlads #pals I’m severely sleep deprived today so I’m just gonna make myself sad thinking about this for a while #hob gadling #dream of the endless

141 notes · View notes

atsadi-shenanigans · 21 days

Text

Feeding Alligators 45 - Walk of Shame

The "finding out" part arrives.

On AO3.

You must fall asleep. Because suddenly the sky has the lightest wash of pale to the east. Your face is swollen and crusty, and your mouth tastes terrible. You sit up, notice how cold and stiff your lower legs are—they stayed out all night in only your trousers and boots.

Your brain doesn’t even give you the courtesy of pretending to forget for an instant why you’re out here. You sit on the ground and the aching dread coils around your guts.

Oh jesus, what’ve you done.

You need to get up. You need to get back before anybody notices you’re gone, before Astarion—

He didn’t come back. He didn’t come back at all, not even to get the blanket that he musta left out here (it smells like him). Something small and delicate cracks and dies within you.

He can’t know you spent the whole night out here like some pathetic, sad sack loser. You cannot give him that over you.

But going back…

Your stomach hurts. It’d be a whole lot easier to lie back down, curl into a ball, and not think for a while. Maybe sleep some more. You don’t have to remember how his skin felt so nice even as the bottom of your stomach dropped out and you fucked this, you ruined whatever seedling thing y’all had, what the fuck is wrong with you.

Except you know that’s not fair, either. It’s not right for him to just expect that. He’s an adult, same as you. It’ll be awkward around camp, you’re sure, but you’ll get over it. You’ll have to. He’ll know that, too.

But you can lay back down for a little while. Let things settle. It’s not for long, just—

Plants rustle. And you remember that your ass is out in the middle of the goddamn woods and there’s bears and hyenas and goblins and shit out here, and you don’t got so much as a stick to defend yourself.

But your legs tangle with the blanket. You really turned yourself into a burrito there, and you kick and flail your way free when—

Shadowheart. When Shadowheart emerges, spots you, and you both freeze.

She frowns. “Eleanor?”

Your name comes out accented funny. “Oh hey there! Shadowheart! How nice to see you!”

But she stares, and you realize you’ve slept and you do not have any dirt potion on you. Great. Peachy. This is just…just going so great.

Shadowheart looks around, looks to the blanket, and her frown deepens. Then she walks over and you make a show of readjusting the clothing you have now slept in so she can’t get a good look at your fucking traitor of a face. She pauses beside you as you run out of things to do with your tunic and have to settle for rubbing the gunk off your face.

When you look up, a glass bottle hovers in front of you. Dirt potion. She’s the best.

You slam it back and grimace and contemplate licking the grass to wipe off the taste.

“Why are you still out here?” she says.

That “still” is doing a lot of work in that sentence. It implies she knew you were out here to begin with (thus why she brought the potion). It also implies you should have returned by now, which itself implies she knows why you were out here to begin with goddamnit, Karlach.

“It was a nice night,” you say.

She lets you fidget like there’s absolutely nothing wrong, like you haven’t bust open capillaries in your face and eyeballs and look like a nervous wreck. Then she says, “Where’s Astarion.”

Which…implies he is not back at camp, either. You ain’t sure what to make of that. He didn’t come back here. You ain’t sure if there’s anything to make of it at all.

“He left,” you say. Try to keep the tone light and unbothered, but disastrously overcompensate. You can hear it in your own voice and you wince.

Shadowheart also catches it.

“Eleanor?” she says. A shush of the grass and the light floral scent of her soap or whatever it is washes over you as she kneels. “Are you alright?”

Of course you are. Nothing happened. That’s the point. So there’s no fucking, goddamn reason for your bitchy little throat to go all tight again. You can’t say anything without giving that away, so you nod.

That’s a mistake. You know it’s a mistake, fuck, fuck.

She leans in. “Eleanor, look at me.”

How about not. Your stupid eyes water now for no good reason and this is pathetic, you are pathetic, and why can’t you fucking stop?

“’M fine,” you say in the most “obviously crying” voice. So you crunch down hard on the inside of your cheek to try to distract your body, but it don’t work because you’re a stupid little bitch and your body is intent on plowing this plane into the side of the mountain and killing everyone on board.

So, as she’s not sitting and you are, Shadowheart moves herself to get a look at your stupid ass face and hers goes all tight.

“Are you injured,” she says without a question mark.

You can’t talk. It’s all snowballing into a fucking emotional avalanche, and you flap your hands as if that means anything.

She touches your chin with a single, delicate finger. “Eleanor, please. I need you to talk to me. Are you hurt anywhere?”

You sniffle like a sad toddler. God, you have such an ugly cry face and your lips and chin are doing that pathetic wobble as you throw everything you have to keep this shit contained.

You do manage to shake your head no.

“Alright, that’s good,” Shadowheart says. “Did Astarion…?”

You don’t understand what she’s asking. He’s not here, clearly. He left after—

It crashes over you. Shadowheart doesn’t trust him and Wyll all but sat himself up with the light on waiting for you to come back (was only missing a shotgun). They’ll think Astarion did something to you. Hurt you.

“No!” you say. “No, no! Nothing like that! Nothing happened at all.”

Shadowheart seems to absorb this. She’s very good at keeping her face blank. You’d hate to gamble against her.

“Why are you out here by yourself?” she says.

Ah. Well. That would be the crux of it, wouldn’t it? People go stargazing, right? You could totally use that. Except you ain’t never showed the slightest interest in the stars, and the canopy here obscures most of them.

And she knows. They all know, apparently, that you weren’t coming out here by yourself.

You look up at her, eyes watering like a bawling calf. You know so little about her. She keeps things tight to the chest.

“N-nothing b-bad happened,” you say. “I j-just. ‘S embarrassing. I d-don’t want everyb-body to know. F-fucking gossip.”

She nods slowly. Says, “Alright. We all have our own secrets. So long as it won’t hurt any of us, I can keep yours.”

She’s so solemn. Y’all’s cleric healer who hates Lae’zel for some reason.

“I—” You hiccup. Oh joy. Because that makes all of this better. “Astarion asked me. K-Karlach told you?” And when Shadowheart nods, “He’s r-ridiculous. I t-thought he was just j-j-joking the whole time. Didn’t think he m-meant it. I ain’t exactly a catch. B-but he asked.”

You don’t got nothing to wipe your face except that blanket. He musta stole it from somewhere, and thought to make you both comfortable out here, and you ruined it and he brought it for nothing now and—

“I-it just, just d-didn’t w-work out.” Good god, your lungs hitch uncontrollably. Jesus fucking lord, you’re hyperventilating. At least you’re far enough away from the others nobody else should hear this. “I-I wanted to s-stop. And he d-did. We d-d-fuck. D-didn’t even get that f-far. ‘M sorry. I d-don’t know w-why this won’t f-fucking stop.”

It just keeps wracking through you, out of control. You’re slamming mental levers, trying in vain to seal the watertight doors, and like the fucking Titanic, that shit just spills over the top, deeper and deeper. Nothing happened. You said stop and he did. Immediately. It was kissing. Maybe necking, you ain’t sure of the definitions.

And yeah, that was your first and now it’s a smoking crater, but so what? So what if your bullshit brain and dumbass endocrine system pitch a fit over it? It was one makeout session. It’s not the end of the world.

But the look on his face. The way he closed off. It hurts. It hurts real bad.

“I’m sorry,” you repeat. “Ain’t n-normally this pathetic over some, some boy.”

Because it is over some man (actually), and ain’t that just galling? You done went and survived so much bullshit, and now you’re reduced to this over a man you just fucking met.

“It’s alright,” Shadowheart says. You sense a hesitation in there. An awkwardness to her crouching with you. He lips purse. “I’m…more adept at healing physical injuries. I’m not…”

“Sure what to do ‘bout a s-stranger leaking all over herself and hyperventilating?” you say. Crack a baby smile. “Me n-neither.”

And that finally pulls the teensiest, most uncertain smile out of her.

“Would you like me to smite him?” she says, almost shy. And you realize she’s joking with you. Hole shit, you got Shadowheart to joke with you.

“N-nah. He’s t-too useful.”

She pulls a face. “At what, complaining?”

“I w-was gonna say t-theatrics.”

She hums. “Well, I suppose every band of misadventurers needs at least one clown.”

It’s probably your shredded nerves, but that pulls a snort out of you. An exceptionally wet one that has you grabbing for the blanket to frantically wipe it away. Which sets off the giggles, and if you can laugh once, you can laugh more, and the hideous tightness in your chest loosens its grip.

“He a-also pretty good at killing things,” you say, thinking of nearly-decapitated Olodan and what he did to Kitchen Lurker.

“Only when they don’t see him coming.”

“Eh. A-ambush predator.”

And she gives you a look. A tiny one. The barest flicker of her eyebrow, but the foolishness of this whole thing starts to seep into you. You were the easiest target twice over. Whatever creepy vampire bullshit he’s got, it led him straight to you. You can’t be that, anymore. Can’t let something like this happen again.

Shadowheart (this is her patrol shift, you find out) helps you back to your feet. Casts a minor healing spell with her glowing jesus hands, and your face cools and settles down.

“Oh,” you say. Not even your eyelids feel puffy. “That’s real useful.”

“It comes in handy. Not on myself, mind you.”

“Course not. You would never.”

And there’s that barest flicker of softness, like the glimmer of fish scales way down in the deep green.

This was a mistake, is all. He read you wrong, and you read him wrong, and y’all can put this behind you. You ain’t gonna cry over a fucking man, certainly not one as outrageous as Astarion, who can go back to his pile of lovers in the city as soon as y’all pull this worm outta y’all’s brains. And y’all kill that fuckface who enslaved him (asshole he may be, but if you can keep him from going back to that shit…).

She lets you catch and smooth your breath. Lets you pat yourself down to make sure you don’t got bark in your shirt or twigs in your hair. Then she walks back with you.

You’ll face Astarion. You ain’t gonna cower. You ain’t gonna be some sad little mope. You’ll talk to him like a goddamn adult (Ryan), and you’ll both move past this and it’ll be fine. Y’all got bigger problems to deal with.

The crew kept the fire burning all night. The sun is reaching its first tendrils of light through the branches as you emerge into the clearing—the camp quiet—smiling softly.

Something moves. Astarion looks away from the dawn light to glance your way. His gaze fixes on Shadowheart for just a second, the barest flicker of narrowing. Then back to you.

“Good morning, darlings,” he says.

And any hint of friendship you thought you’d built crumbles to ash. There is nothing in his eyes when he looks at you. It’s the same, fake face he wore on the beach, when he tackled you to the ground with a knife to your throat. Outside, he’s clean and coiffed. But inside, the man is as hollow and plastic as a barbie doll.

#feeding alligators fic #these two shitheads #astarion fic #astarion x tav #tavstarion #slow burn #eventual happy ending #we're in the sadness arc now #demisexual tav #plus size tav #isekai

17 notes · View notes

tessa-liam · 1 year

Text

Smoke and Mirrors

Chap 5 The Search Begins

Book: The Royal Romance Finale AU

Series Premise: Hidden in the shadows, poised to challenge the status quo are enemies of the state. The loyalties and honesty of family and of friends will be tested. ‘Keep your friends close, your enemies closer.’

Catch up: Smoke and Mirrors Masterlist

Main Pairing: Liam Rys x F!MC Riley Brooks-Rys, OTP ‘LiRi’

2nd Pairings: Leo Rys x Amalas, Drake Walker x F!OC Delaney Leigh

All characters belong to Pixelberry, except Delaney Leigh and Officer Alex Cossoy

Rating: M🔞*Series Warnings: NSFW material, sexual innuendo, adult language/swearing/drinking

Category: Alternate Universe/on-going series/angst/fluff

Words: 1971, Read: 10 minutes

Chap 5: The Search Begins

Chapter Summary: The search for Lena begins in Monterisso.

Music Inspiration: Like I’m Gonna Lose You – Meghan Trainor/John Legend

A/N1: @choicesflashfics Week #23, Prompt #1 - “If there was ever anybody meant for me, it’s you.”

A/N2: Not beta’d - please excuse all errors

A/N3: This is my submission for Choices March Challenge, Prompt: “Forehead kisses”, @choicesmonthlychallenge @lovealexhunt

Catch up Here... Smoke and Mirrors Masterlist

Monterisso Royal Palace

As the Royal SUV passed through the entry gates of the palace grounds, Ellie excitedly bounced in her car seat next to Riley.

“Look mommy, Micaela’s palace!”

“Yes, princess, it’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Princesses Eleanor and Micaela were spending the week together while the search for Lena begins. Riley was looking forward to spending some one on one time with Queen Amalas, as well as, learning more about ‘Lena Rys’.

Unbeknownst to Riley at the time of planning, however, her husband had arranged for her to stay exclusively at the Monterissan palace for the week. Liam wanted his pregnant wife to stay out of the active search and be sheltered at the palace with guards while being away from him physically. He had made the arrangements ahead of time and without her prior consultation; which irritated her.

Riley wanted to take part in the search, but after hearing Liam’s concerns earlier in the morning, she realized that his concerns were justified.

Earlier that morning, inside the royal chambers aboard the royal yacht...

Riley was livid. She didn't want to be forced to stay behind in the Monterissan palace, under any circumstances. Her anger was focused on Liam, because he wasn't willing to come to a compromise with her on this issue.

“Why did you not tell me this before?”

“...because I knew that you would fight me on this. I needed to have the arrangements in place before we entered this country.”

Liam knew his wife. He knew that if she could, she would lead the search party with guns blazing.

“Let Interpol take the lead on this. The sooner we find this woman, the better. I will keep you informed with every detail as it happens. I promise, love.”

Riley glared at Liam and then looked out the window. He was right, but she still felt annoyed that being pregnant meant ‘sitting on the sidelines’ and not being productive.

The royal yacht had anchored, and she watched as Drake and Delaney were stepping into an SUV on the dock.

“Love, remember our wedding night?” Liam interrupted her thoughts and continued.

“One minute we were dancing in the ballroom, and then in the next moment, I was being told you were taken.

I had let my guard down...”

Riley turned to Liam, taking his hands in hers. “Liam, how could you have known that was going to happen? We cannot let the past dictate our future.”

“Yes, but only a fool doesn’t learn from his mistakes. Last night, I dreamt we were dancing, Riley, and I was holding you in my arms. Just like our wedding night. Then, just like that night, Bastien informed me that you were taken. The man I had entrusted with our safety. The man who is now incarcerated for treason.

I woke up in a panic.

The anxiety was back.

I could not breathe.

When I finally realized that you were lying next to me, sleeping peacefully; the relief was palpable. I think I had this dream as a reminder, to not take your safety for granted again. Ever.”

‘In the blink of an eye, just a whisper of smoke, you could lose everything, the truth is you never know.’

“Riley, I know that you are early into the pregnancy, but you need to take care of yourself.” Placing his hand on her baby bump, “and our babies.”

“After that dream, I knew what I had to do. We are not promised a tomorrow, Riley. If something was to happen to you, if I made the wrong decision for your safety, and you were harmed in any way; it would destroy me.”

Riley lovingly cupped Liam’s face and reached up to give him a lingering kiss. “If there was ever anybody meant for me, it’s you.”

Overcome with emotion, she hung her head. “I’m so sorry Liam, I am acting like a child.”

Liam looked down to her face and lifted her chin with his thumb and forefinger. Gazing into her chocolate brown eyes, he gently wiped the tears that were falling on her cheeks.

Kissing her again, “my queen, when this issue is resolved, I think we will go on a vacation. Just you and me, Ellie, and these two little ones.”

“You have my attention, Liam.” Riley smiled, pulling his body close to hers.

“Mommy, Daddy, I am ready.” Ellie announced as she stood beside her nanny at the door.

Liam dropped his forehead to his wife’s forehead and whispered, “stay safe, my queen. I love you.”

“I love you too, my king, so much!”

“Oh, and love....I will take you anywhere you choose.” Liam winked and placed his hand on the small of her back, to guide her towards Ellie.

Riley turned to her daughter, taking her hand, as Liam reached for Ellie’s other hand. They walked together to the dock to the other waiting SUV. The royal guard opened the door for Riley, while Liam walked with Ellie to the other side of the@ SUV.

“Ok, Daddy, I will,” her blue sparkled as she looked up to her father.

After ensuring his daughter was secured in her car seat, Liam kissed Ellie’s forehead. “Take good care of your mommy, princess.”

After closing the door, Liam sighed as he watched his family drive off towards the Capital. He then turned to walk towards the other SUV to join Drake and Delaney.

***

The driver slowed to a stop; the security detail of the Monterissian palace moved into position surrounding the SUV carrying Riley and Ellie.

Amalas was waiting outside the palace doors, as the royal guard stepped up to open the door for Riley, as Ellie and her nanny followed.

***

Royal Monterisso Hotel

Walking into the opulent hotel lobby, Drake and Delaney were shown to the concierge desk for the check-in while Liam was ushered to a secure meeting room by the Interpol operatives.

“Your Majesty,” Officer Alex Cossoy, along with the detectives bowed.

“Gentlemen, ladies,” Liam answered in response.

Leo and Olivia were already seated at the conference table, when Drake also entered and sat down.

“Let’s get started.” Officer Cossoy began with a briefing on the current

situation and confirmed that the search party had narrowed the search area down to a five mile radius.

“A five mile radius from what point?” Leo asked, sitting forward to view the map of the area that was laid out on the table.

“That would be here,” the detective pointed to the map. “Five miles north of the city center, according to the last reported location,” the detective replied pointing to the map. On the screen the detective typed in the coordinates that they had received earlier from the local authorities.

Leo pointed to the harbor on the map. “Can you zoom in, here?”

“Yes, sir.” The detective moved a curser over the map, and a magnified

image appeared. Liam pointed to a large boat docked at the pier.

“Get the team down there now.”

***

Monterisso Royal Palace

In the garden, Ellie and Micaela and a bevy of stuffed animals sat at the table at their afternoon garden tea party.

Amalas went all out for the girls’ party, having the kitchens prepare finger sandwiches, petit fours with iced tea.

Both girls were wearing frilly party dresses with white knee high socks and Mary Jane shoes.

Ellie and Mikaela were giggling as they played with each other's hair, and then laughing as they ran around the table chasing after the same doll.

Riley and Amalas sat on lounge chairs on the terrace overlooking the gardens.

Amalas patted Riley’s leg comfortingly.

“How have you been feeling with the pregnancy?”

Riley smiled, “It’s going well so far. I’ve been a little emotional lately though.”

Amalas raised an eyebrow, looking at her friend.

“Oh, is anything in particular bothering you?”

Riley shook her head, “no, it's just these damn hormones.”

“Well, you are having twins. That means everything is doubled.”

Giving Amalas a smirk, “Liam and I are finding out the sex of the babies next week.”

“That's so exciting! Have you and Liam picked out names yet?”

“We started the day we found out we were having twins! Liam is beyond excited! For girls, we were thinking ‘Eliana’ and ‘Elise’. For boys. ‘William’ and ‘Stefan’.”

Riley continued, “Elise and Stefan were the names of my parents.”

“Oh, my goodness, those names are perfect,” Amalas smiled.

***

The team of operatives, dressed in black tactical gear were all armed with automatic weapons and bullet proof vests, and they were also equipped with GPS tracking devices.

However, Lena continued to evade the authorities.

Frustrated, Officer Cossoy kicked a storage container, sending its contents pouring onto the deck of the boat.

“Take it easy, Officer, Lena isn't in there.” Olivia cheekily called out to the annoyed Interpol officer.

“Damn it, I should have known this was another false lead!”

Olivia, who was walking with Leo behind the officer, overheard the comment. “What do you mean?”

“Well, intelligence reports suggested that the palace would be the most likely target area. I should have followed my gut.”

“Officer Cossoy,” as Olivia began to speak, he interrupted, “Alex, please call me Alex.”

“Alex, what is your gut telling you?”

“Duchess Olivia, I am positive that she has a connection in the royal guard in Monterisso through Bastien Lykel.”

As Liam overheard the words of the Interpol officer, the anxiety he felt last night returned. He needed to find Riley and get her and Ellie out of Monterisso now!

⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️⚜️

Please let me know if you would like to be added or removed from the tag list.

@irisk12 @walkerdrakewalker @jared2612 @thesvnsins @irisk12 @aussiegurl1234 @emkay512 @tinkie1973 @kyra75 @lovingchoices14 @imjusthereforliam @kingliam2019 @karahalloway @busywoman @harleybeaumont @differenttyphoonwerewolf @alj4890 @xpandass420x @twinkleallnight @sfb123 @queenmiarys @txemrn @ao719

64 notes · View notes

hermanunworthy · 7 months

Text

!DNDADS S2 EP44 SPOILERS!

aTONYment??? what does pepperoni tony have to so w this. oh my god are they gonna visit him in heaven or something. wtf is happening. guess i gotta listen and find out (im scared)

- BETH PLAYING AS NPC BETH MAY

- "ron... what ARE we?" WTF IS HAPPENINGGG

- ROGUE TAYLOR??????

- MORE GOOFY FREDDIE NUMBERS IM EXCITED

- NO NO DONT SAY THE LINCOLN FACT AS LINCOLN THATS GONNA MAKE ME SAD

- WILL IS SO SILLY i love that man

- i like the energy at the start of this one its fun

- wait is anthony doing a regular dad fact

- ANTHONY. 😭

- FREDDIE DEATH SOUND MY BELOVED

- DID LINCOLN JUST CALL HIS GRANDPA ZADDY. NEVER AGAIN

- "i had more fun in the other place" GREASE CAR FLASHBACKS.

- OMG EARLY HERMIE APPEARANCE (i choked on my food)

- "no! we cant! my scene partner!" they are so besties (worsties)

- "MY FUTURE LIFE PARTNER" HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK OAKWORTHY CRUMBS. OH M GOD . FUTURE LIFE PARTNER.

- MEATBALL SCARY

- TERRY JR SOON. GUYS

- oh wow beth hasnt cast unseen servant since. goth

- ANTHONYS BABY VOICE

- so lincoln is looking for the eleanor shellstrop okay (this whole heaven/hell stuff has just constantly been reminding me of tgp)

- "he looks up at them asianly" has the same energy as the "cries in spanish" meme

- FREDDIES LITTLE SONG HAS ME SCREAMINGGGG

- ARE TJEY ACTUALLY GONNA FIND TONY. OH MY GOD

- WOW ALL U GUYS THAT WERE JUST TELLING ME HOW U MISS PEPPERONI TONY. HOW ARE YALL FEELING

- SCARY HAS A CHANCE TO APOLOGIZE.

- 4:30 MILE IS ACTUALLY INSANE. MATT.

- HOW DID WILL FORGET THAT SOCCER IS LINKS WHOLE THING

- GOD LINK CALLING NORMAL OUTTT

- HERMIE. FUCK OFFFFF

- SPARROW OFFERING NORMAL A HUG????

- FUUUUUCK. NORMAL

- help i would like to interrupt for just a sec to say that in the middle of the episode just now i got hired at spirit halloween. dndads reference GAKDJD

- TONY WAS WAITING FOR MARGARITA WAAAAA

- SCARY SOUNDS SO NERVOUS NOBODY HMU

- IM GONNA CRY. I CANT DO THIS

- PLZZZZ LET THEM SEE MARGARITA AGAIN PLZZZ

- SCARY WHY WOULD U ASK IF IT HURT :[[

- WHAT IS THE VIBE OF THIS SCENE. HELP

- NOOOO I NEED SCARY AND MARGARITA TO INTERACT AGAIN. THEY ARE GFS

- SCARY CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT....

- THEY ARE BEING SO AWFUL TO NORMAL. QUIT IT

- SCARYS TALKING ABOUT TERRY. END ME

- "he never knew me when i was someone to be proud of" OOOUGHGHHH

- IF THAT FUCKING SWORD GOT INTO HERMIES HANDS. THEY WOULD BE UNSTOPPABLE

- NORMAL. BURIES MY HEAD IN THE FUCKING DIRT

- ooo normal dragging the sword would make cool fanart

- i honestly love salty normal but it also makes me really sad

- SCARY DIDNT INCLUDE HERMIE AMONG HER SPOUSES????

- TY WILL FOR REMEMBERING NICKY

- TAYLOR DEFENDING HIS DAD AWWW

- WTF IS THIS FIGHT???? HELLO??

- IS NORMAL FINALLY SNAPPING. IS THIS HAPPENING

- "I AM JEALOUS I DONT HAVE ANY COOL DYNAMICS W ANYBODY!!!" FUUUUUUCKK

- i cant do this i feel sick im SICK

- "why are they arguing i thought they liked each other" WHAT IF I BURST INTO TEARS RN.

- THE NORMAL ANGST IN THIS EPISODE IS TOOOO MUCH FOR ME

- NORMAL PUT THE MASCOT COSTUME BACK ON. FUCK. FUCK

- "ME AND MY THREE BEST FRIENDS AND MY FUTURE BOYFRIEND" GUYS. GUYS I CANNOT DO THIS

- THESE KIDS ARE SOOOO TRAUMATIZED WHAT THE HELLLL

- OH RON WAS IN SCARYS POCKET

- TERRY IS IN THE "PLANES OF MISERY"????

- "maybe he saw what u could be" BETH.....

- LINKS TRYING TO TALK TO NORMAL AGAIN PLZ END MY SUFFERING

- TERRY AND GLENN ARE FUCKING FIGHTING EACH OTHER????? WHATTTT

- OH NEXT EPISODE IS GONNA BE WIIIIIILD DUUUDE

#dndads #dndads spoilers #dndads s2 spoilers #siren says

16 notes · View notes

eternal-smiles · 2 months

Text

It has been almost two and a half hours since the teens escaped, patched themselves up, got their equipment and are now blindly walking through the corridors with what they have equipped . Walking through the dim halls of the Ministry…

“So, boys… what’s the plan here?…” Eleanor ask with fear within her voice. The brothers instantly stopped and looked at each other… having a worried expression on their faces. “We’ve been here for almost an hour, and the both of you don’t have any ideas?…” Eleanor hissed with anger.

“Hey hey, we know we don’t have a good plan! But basically we are going to get our parents back, and getting the hell out of here!” Thomas responded. He can understand the worry and frustration out from Ellie, he doesn’t blame her. “Okay, we need to find a map of this place and see what we’re facing in the future.”

Eleanor sighs nervously, looking at the brothers with doubt in her eyes. She then felt Ein nuzzling her leg as he sat down and gave her a comforting look. “Alright… let alone we have no other choice…. But I trust you both. Just please let’s be extremely careful… we don’t know what lies ahead of us.”

“Gotcha Ellie, now… Vomas, let’s not stay here to look pretty.” Thomas spoke with a chuckle. Now guiding the group to the unknown…

It wasn’t long as they encountered a sign above them. Nearly resembling a operating theater, but massive difference is the word above the entrance of a new hospital like hall… Inoculator. Wait… that word…

Tobias looked over to his brother with shock. “Hey, Tom?… Wasn’t that from the ride?… N-No hella way it’s real… Right?” He asked, while Thomas stepped back to think about this.

“You have a point… so… wait… does that mean this place have the legit five stages?…” Thomas looked worried as he asked himself that very question, looking back to both Ellie and Toby. “I guess we’re going through the real five stages…” Before he could continue, he noticed Ein growling quietly as he stared into the halls. “Hide, quick!” He whispered as the group took cover… and right on time…

Two doctor like employees walked through the halls, one looking beat up. “My word! The new female Advocate pulled a nasty fight on us! All we want to do is give her the Joy Serum for her to feel Happiness!”

“Oh I agree, especially the male Advocate who is very stubborn about not only taking the serum, but the Giggler Gas and Hypnotiser. Luckily he is at 38% of Marmalisation.” The other spoke, but soon laughed as they knew the new Advocates won’t last forever if they resisted. The teens meanwhile are doing everything in their power not attacking the very two men who are hurting their remaining parents, but for Eleanor at the same time, she was scared for what will happen to her father. “And what percentage is the newest advocate is at?”

“I believe she’s at 29%. We will continue in the morning, for now we do need rest. The Sanctuary is making sure they are under watch.” The Doctor spoke with both glee and tiredness, yet the boys felt their hearts sink. Their mother’s time is running out. As the two doctors left, the group were pale as ghosts… learning new information that they’re afraid for what will happen.

“Mom and Ellie’s dad are still there and fighting back. Yet if these fools keep breaking them down…” Tom didn’t want to think about it, thankfully his thought ended as Eleanor walked in front of him and his brother.

“W-W-We must keep going! They cannot get away with this! This is curl and inhuman! Forcing people to be “happy” is not the right way!” Eleanor was very enraged from what she and the brothers have discovered, yet she was quickly calmed down by them and Ein.

“I know, but we now have an idea on what they do to people who are… I guess are in some what depressed and what they know?.. I’m kinda processing it…” Tom spoke softly, now looking back to see the halls are empty. “Let’s at least do our best to get them back. They said something about a Sanctuary, they might be still there since they pulled a big fight…”

Thomas got out of hiding, followed by his brother who now looked over to Ellie. The young woman was angry, but she was also afraid… “Ellie, we got this. I trust my brother to lead us through. I want to know this: Do you trust us?” Tobias asked. His voice was very soft as a form of way to help calm Ellie. “Because in all honesty here, the only thing we can do now is trust each other… and we do trust you.”

“I…” Eleanor was hesitant, but seeing the twin brothers’ determination and valor… she had no choice. “I do… and I’m flattered you both trust me.” She gave a soft small smile. Even feeling Ein nuzzle her to support her. “I guess… Onwards to the Five Stages of Hell.”

“Big time.” Both brothers said, and off they went… “Now let’s Rock!”

To be continued….

#ministry of joy #the smiler #smiling advocate #the ministry of joy #Eternal Echoes #Eternal Smies

8 notes · View notes

bewilderedbuck · 1 year

Note

But I feel like we'll be getting so much emotional, soft and intimate Benvi this season and I can't wait. I think Devi's reluctance to fully enter into a relationship with Ben is partially because she doesn't feel good enough, she's hurt him in the past, and she's afraid to let herself get so close to someone only to lose them like what happened with her father. I can't wait to see her realize all of this and I'm pretty sure Dr. Ryan knows she is just using everyone else as a distraction from Ben. Side note but I think Treleanor will break up and I'm so not ready for that even though it makes sense for their characters

YESSS to your first point!!! i really want, to encompass all three, that delicate emotional intimacy that the two of them so obviously crave. especially as these characters are starting to grow into young adults and mature, i definitely see this season being on the track for at least two deep, emotional conversations between ben and devi. personally, i'm hoping for three, and i want them to feel realistic - yes devi has been in therapy for the past 3-4 years but i don't want therapy speak coming out of her mouth or ben's - i don't think that would feel very in-character for them, you know?

i do agree, dr. ryan is going to be, once again, instrumental in helping devi realize she needs to get her head out of her ass and go after what she wants (because we already know she does want). and i'm hoping that eleanor and fab take part in that too; we've got that scene fron 2x10 with eleanor and ben ("she wanted to choose you.") and that other scene from 3x04 with fab and ben ("yeah, well, she broke my heart.") so they've both got this peek at a heartbroken ben, the two people closest to devi have seen how this boy hurts for her, because of her, and now they've got their hands full with devi who's hurting for him (and like this can probably be argued, but that still of ben and devi in her bed when shes wearing her prom dress? that's more than just "i'm sad i didn't go to prom" and you cannot convince me otherwise). i don't think they're going to push ben and devi together by any means - both of them need to find their way back to each other - but i definitely think they're going to play a part in helping. (and honestly, i hope paxton does too - i can see him being on ben's side, in his corner.)

and i KNOW this post is already getting long but like before i forget because i so desperately want to touch on this: on the note of that emotional intimacy i mentioned above...there's just something so terrifying about being that vulnerable, you know? and i know i already sort of touched on this before but like, if we go back to what kamala said in 3x01, "when you sleep with someone, you're the most vulnerable you'll ever be. and if you rush into that, you could get really hurt." and i'm thinking, what if devi internalizes this afterwards? what if she thinks back on those words, thinks that she just rushed into that with ben? because they weren't together. they didn't discuss what it meant for either of them. they didn't talk, they just did it. obviously, from our perspective, this seems anything but rushed, because they've been doing this push-and-pull for the past three seasons. but devi, having her reputation as impulsive and destructive, could easily file this away as something else she followed through without thinking it over. so, she thinks she rushed. so, she's scared she's going to get hurt. or that ben will get hurt, maybe. or that both of them will. and so she runs, and he stays, and both of them ghost, until they're both breaking at the seams and they know this is their last chance to get it right. and yes, it hurts. it hurt in the beginning and the middle and it hurts when they're finally coming back together but god is it worth it. and it isn't rushed - it's just this beautiful progression, this journey with mountains and valleys that they've both endured and come out all the better for it.

on a slightly lighter note yeah i also think treleanor is going to break up 😭😭 HOWEVER i think it's going to be mutual, with no hard feelings, and a hope to meet again in the future 💕

#hi sorry i went off again <3 because once i start talking about nhie i cannot stop <3 #ik this post is mostly spec + me talking abt fear of intimacy that may not even actually be CANON but. its making me crazy thinking abt it #long post #benvi #nhie #never have i ever #nhie s4 spec #asks #grace tag #mutuals

26 notes · View notes

affront2god-affectionate · 9 months

Text

My dear Kit

A Bat Coven LLC production

Warnings: not really, there is swearing, discussions of mortality, mentions of people having sex. Otherwise it's quite gen.

My installment into the Paradiso-verse by @alwaysyourshenry and @the-bats-who-simp, it's my prequel fic for their "The Priest You Want" fic. (they're multiplying, oh no)

The whole text is just letters between David and Kit Marlowe in the spring of 1593.

****

"My dear Kit.

You’re being ridiculous. Can I be honest with you? I’d like to be very honest with you, since you were nothing but brutally honest with me in the past. You’re being Ridiculous, I emphasise.

First of all, let’s begin with the less recent one: I’ve seen, with mine own two eyes, you leaving IN THE MIDDLE OF A RITUAL in quite a rude manner, breaking the circle, just because the result was not to your immediate satisfaction. Dr. Dee was of a better opinion of you, I had to apologize on your behalf. My opinion about you as a person hasn’t changed, I’ve always thought of you as too dramatic for your own good, that doesn’t prevent me from being your friend. My opinion of you as a witch, however, has indeed suffered. Whilst I’m still holding you in high regard for your POTENTIAL, for your capabilities and insights, it seems to me you are a LAZY FUCK, my friend. Lazy, lazy, lazy. As a cat that ran into a fish shop and ate so much he can’t move.

Which brings me to the point that is causing this letter to appear on your doorstep later today. What are those sexcapades you’re conducting? Not your regular ones, mind you, I’m talking about Eleanor and James. You can distract yourself with anything you want for however long you need, I know your priorities are with your writing, and keeping your mind distracted helps you not getting stuck. I respect that. But you’re keeping them distracted too! Last full moon you had them for three nights in a row, probably for days too; I had to perform all three of our jobs myself, creating substitutions for them out of some rocks and twigs, like a peasant, (which I am). Why is this? Jamie’s energy is off the charts, kudos to you for that, but I’m not sure Nora can perform anything really, barely standing up straight, poor lass. I would’ve had envy, but I’m mostly concerned.

I’m happy for your happiness, all of you, but don’t impose your disorderly attitude onto others. Some of us has to work, you know.

And what is it that I’m hearing about you wanting to leave the workings entirely? With all my love and affection, sincerely, fuck you. You are very frustrating, my dear friend. Please explain yourself even if you’re not planning on improving the above situation.

Your very annoyed, David."

****

"My darling David!

Your annoyance is highly amusing for me, I don’t know what are you so excited about. Both Jamie and Nora are grown-ups and can make up their own mind. If you cannot understand someone being in love, don’t complain about sour grapes and let people be happy. That being said, I’m sorry I got you so riled up, and I am terribly sorry you cannot stop working even for a couple of days. A nice drinking binge would do you plenty of good, hear my advice, otherwise you’re starting to sound like a priest, and not a fun one like our dearest James. Sorry we missed your mass, padre. Full moon happens every month and is not going anywhere, and human bodies only live for for so long. Those are the priorities, not the words themselves or my whimsical muse.

You’re also always welcome to join our “sexcapades” any day you want. I promise you that you won’t be walking straight either. My door is always open, et cetera.

As for me leaving… Please understand that this is very difficult to me. I am calling and calling, again and again, and I don’t feel like I’m being heard even, let alone gratified with an answer. I am watching our good Doctor conducting his summonings while I myself am unable to see those who he’s talking to. I am making bloody sacrifices and hearing only silence. This is very easy for you, in your tower of privilege, to orate about The Work and commitment and allegiance, but you are so, so loved. You never knew the disapproval of the “other side”, you don’t know what it feels like to not be worthy of Devil’s attention. I was hoping that at least my play would speak of my worth, would be beneficial somehow in gaining an audience, but all I got was one dream and oh so short resolution on a piece of paper. It was approved. How nice. When I am gonna be approved? What do I have to do? Do you even know how utterly terrifying the silence is? Have you ever heard it?

Don’t give me your lectures and wise words when everything you do is made of gold and burning like a thousand suns. I don’t even want to be you, you may be surprised about it, but I’d rather be myself. I don’t want to be Jamie or Nora either. Can I just walk my own way, will you bestow that gift upon me? I’m sorry if I’m harsh, but you really are getting quite insufferable, darling. Go touch some grass maybe, hug a tree. For a witch in close connection to Mother Nature you seem so utterly disconnected. People have lives. Not everything is a ritual or serves a higher purpose. Do you know the joy of being purpose-less and care-free? You should try it.

The lack of response is what making me want to leave and live my silly human life to the best of my ability. Does that explanation satisfy your highest standards?

Your very disillusioned, Christopher."

****

"My dear Kit.

Your letter has annoyed me even more by breaking my heart, whatever has left of it, but it also helped me to gain some insight on the matters that were eluding my attention before. I thank you for that.

I still, however, think that you would gain a lot of favor just by simply working. That is all that ever counts, truly. I saddens me that you just seem to be not liking the process so much and only seeing it as the means to an end. Which is fair, not everyone is in love with the magick itself. I really thought you were, though. Well, that’s just unfortunate.

Have you tried to ask Jamie about it, though? You’ve barely mentioned him in your letter, but he is powerful beyond your wildest imagination, and very naturally so. While Dr. Dee takes a scientific approach, which I admire, he lacks the conductive properties our good pastor has. Jamie does have a direct line to the places you wish to reach. Have you tried asking him? Or could it be that your sensual obsession with him is in fact an attempt at communicating, which you’re avoiding to tell me?

I wish I could help, but the only advice I ever have for anyone is simply “work more”, and it’s not very helpful for you in this situation. I’m sorry. I wish I could.

Please join the circle this friday, if possible. You are missed.

With best regards, your friend David.

I hate you."

****

"David, I really wish you would open the door just once so I won’t have to spend precious paper and the time of my life writing to you all the things that could have been just simply said out loud. Your habit of never opening to anyone knocking is really getting at my nerves. I know you hate talking and you know I hate writing more than necessary, seems that this predicament is unsolvable between us. One day I’ll begin either breaking your windows or scream my messages to you from the outside, for the whole street to hear.

Nevertheless.

David, you inept fuck.

While I do love you and hold you dear to my heart, you are completely unable to see anything further than your own dick. Do you really think it never once occured to me to ask father James to connect me with his contacts? Do you really think I would complain so pathetically, squirming as worm, if my goals were within my reach? I will relay to you what had happened, even though I would wish for you to guess. And you shall be able to guess, rightfully so, in one take. “It is very dangerous,” – he said. “You do not know what you wish for,” - he said. “Don’t open the doors you don’t know how to close,” - he said. Do you seriously suggest I push the protector FROM demons to connect me WITH demons? Because I tried, Lord knows I tried, and despite all his power his alignment won’t let him help me. I don’t know how do you tolerate that man. He is worse than you when it comes to his work. Maybe that’s what you have in common, Lord help me.

I’m not joining your silly circle of pundits, I’m done. I wish you would join our circle, instead. You could at least provide us with some frankincense fumes while we’re doing the deed. You’re good at being a substitute priest while Jamie is busy otherwise. That is one thing I gotta hand to you. And I know for a fact that Jamie misses you, even though he is too proud to admit it. Your refusal to participate is ridiculous. Am I so repulsive to you? Ah, who cares really. I am almost done with this kind of magick too.

I am going away soon. One might even said I plan on dying within a month. I’m sorry if I’m not leaving you the forwarding address: I want this getaway to solve the problem of your immortality and me getting older. That is the thing I wanted to tell you in person earlier today, if only you’d opened your damned door. I am vain, and the though of getting older while my lovers are forever young pains me. And I won’t be joining your coven, for the reasons I hope you might understand, for I don’t wish to explain them to you. So there’s that.

Please give me a good funeral. The particular arrangements are left with you-know-who you-know-where.

Very tired of your bullshit, but still with affection, Christopher."

****

"Oh, Kit.

You are severely overreacting and I am very tired of dealing with your hysterics, so I feel like your departure will be for the best. Please know that I will miss you and will grieve you as if you were truly dead. You are one of the very best friends I’ve ever had yet, if only you were not so unbearable.

If you truly made up your mind about remaining mortal, I won’t stop you. I also won’t be stopping you from enjoying your love for as long as you’re planning. I don’t think you need me there, not really, but for the sake of parting on good terms I will hold a candle and burn some incense near your bed, I owe you at least that. You’re not repulsive, you’re just very tiresome and I see you more like a brother, and you know this perfectly well. I find it amusing how your self-deprecating humour rather shows how utterly in love with yourself you are, that even slightest disagreement puts you into the spiral, Void forbid someone don’t comply with your wishes. You are but a baby. I could not possibly handle an eternity by your side. I still wish you would join us. But the decision is made, so be it.

If there ever will be a day when you would wish me to bury you for real, I will do this. I will hold your hand and guide to the other side. If there ever will be a day you decide not to leave the mortal plain after all, I will provide you with a suitable stone to bind your spirit. That way we can keep getting tired of each other for centuries more until you decide to go finally. There are ways of dealing with mortality one way or another, find me if you ever decide on something.

I am not going to solve your problems any further, since it seems to me that you yourself have no intention of solving them. You love your problems. You love your drama. Have fun with it.

Cheers, mate.

With best regards, David."

****

"My darling David.

You hurt me with you words. I am offended and upset. If you saw my eyes behind your window yesterday, it was me standing in the rain to reproach you for being so harsh.

Jokes aside, I never actually asked you to solve any of my problems. That is your weakness, you always try to solve everyone around you, but ever once did I see you solving yourself, darling. Sincerely, shut the fuck up and please take a good care of yourself, and leave my bleeding to me. My troubles do not need solving, they are my bread and butter, they are what makes me great. I thrive on the heartbreak. My latest heartbreak is over the Devil himself, for I am indeed very ambitious. But at the end of the day it is just something to make my days more interesting.

If ever get bored of being mortal, I’ll find you. Don’t hold your breath though, because I find you just as insufferable as you find me; I hate you, you little righteous Hell-obsessed freak. Leave me be, Jamie and Nora need you much more than I do. Take a good care of them too, though; otherwise I will come to haunt you.

I’ve set the date for my departure, so if you still want to join us I suggest you hurry up, your time is running out. The moon is gonna be full again soon. Let our last dance to be a magnificent one.

Very benevolent today, your very mortal Christopher."

#bat coven llc

10 notes · View notes

loycspotting · 20 days

Text

4. Ewan McGregor Movie Review: Nothing but the Truth (1995)

TRIGGER WARNING: In this review, I mention sexual violence because that is what this movie is about. I don't go into great detail. Still, if the topic of sexual violence/assault is triggering for you then this is your warning to scroll past.

Ewan McGregor's first project of 1995 was the pilot episode of British television series Kavanagh Q.C. titled "Nothing but the Truth." You might be asking yourself, "television series? I thought those were going to be excluded?" You're right and the reason I included this episode in our movie review list is because it has a runtime of an HOUR AND FORTY-ONE MINUTES. Where I come from, we call that a movie. The episode is also a standalone project, meaning that you don't need to watch the whole series or even an additional episode to finish the plot or understand the narrative. Everything you need to know for the episode happens in the episode.

A couple fun facts before we get started!

In this project, Ewan works alongside Geraldine James again. You might remember her from our previous review as the ex-jazz singer in "Doggin' Around." I thought that was cool! Here, she plays Eleanor Harker Q.C. (Queen's Counsel) who is the prosecutor attorney.

If you've ever heard Ewan say that he met his wife while working on a project, THIS is that project! This is where he met his first wife, Eve Mavrakis, who is credited as the Assistant Art Director. The episode aired January 3, 1995 and six months later they were wed.

Let's dive in!

Movie Review: "Nothing but the Truth" stars the late John Thaw as the titular Kavanagh Q.C. James Kavanagh is a senior barrister and arguably the best. While he couldn't be more adept at his job as a barrister, the same cannot be said for his job as a husband and father. The demands of these roles pull him in different directions and cause friction between him and his wife. The main plot is about an affluent young man accused of sexually assaulting the woman for whom he works. Naturally, it's a he said/she said situation. He claims that is was a consensual fling while she claims the opposite. The evidence corroborates both of their stories to an extent which makes it even harder know who is being honest. As one of the best lawyers in Britain, Kavanagh is tasked with defending the accused. Unfortunately, defending a man accused of rape only creates more cracks in the foundation of his familial relationships. Armed with his intellect and belief in the inherent goodness of man, Kavanagh is determined to find nothing but the truth.

Ewan Review: Ewan plays the character David Armstrong who is our young man accused of sexual assault. He has a posh English accent and is incredibly soft-spoken. He also has a stutter which sounds a bit forced at times. This role is my absolute favorite for his long, silky, hair era! We get a few shots of it in the half-up/half-down style but for the majority of the film it's all down. They must have given him a full on blow out because that hair was thick, long, and luscious! His hair needed it's own acting credit. Ewan also showcases his acting skills really well in this role. I've felt for a long time that Ewan performs best in roles that require subtlety and he does a great job in this one. On a more critical note, even though he often plays characters who are depicted in a negative light, those stories tend to require you to suspend your disbelief. That is not the case with this movie. This is a serious topic and the movie handles it with the seriousness it deserves. If Ewan brings you comfort and you only engage with his more wholesome roles, then this might not be for you. There are no graphic depictions of sex in the movie but there is sexual audio twice and in the court scenes the characters go into detail about the incident.

Screentime Percentage (All numbers are rounded to the nearest whole number): Ewan is on screen for a grand total of 21/101 minutes making his SP 21%.

To Ewan or not to Ewan: Is this movie worth watching for Ewan content alone? Yes, even with the low percentage! Again, his hair is *chef's kiss* 🤌. We get to see him sweaty and working in the dirt as well as dressed up in a three piece suit. There's also a brief makeout scene and shirtless scene. Is the movie worth watching in general? This is very difficult for me to say but my answer is no. My opinion is that the movie is /only/ worth watching for Ewan. If he wasn't in it or was in it even less then it'd be a skip for me. The premise is interesting but the movie can be slow in places. Also, maybe it's just because this was the pilot episode or the legal system being different in Britain, but there were significant issues not addressed in the court scenes that make the ending a little less satisfying. If you like crime shows, then you might like this regardless of the Ewan factor. But be warned, this is not a flashy, fast-paced drama like Law and Order SVU or Criminal Minds. It's an old, British, drama about an old lawyer.

Where to Watch: "Nothing but the Truth" is currently uploaded for free on YouTube through the channel "Ewan McGregor Vault". Just search "Kavanagh Q.C. Nothing But the Truth with Ewan McGregor". If you want to watch the full series, all episodes are also uploaded for free on a YouTube playlist through the channel "o p i u m 1". Just search "Kavanagh Qc".

Conclusion: "Nothing but the Truth" is a hidden gem in Ewan McGregor's career. Unlike other crime shows I've seen, this movie was unique in that there wasn't very much information the audience had that the characters didn't. You really have to pay attention, trust your gut, and hope the verdict is the right one. This also makes the movie great for rewatches because you'll start to notice things in the background that add to the story. I highly suggest watching this with another person because if you're like me, you're going to have a lot to talk about as the truth is revealed.

#ewan mcgregor #ewan mcgregor characters #film review #movie review #ewan mcgregor movie review #crime shows #crime series #crime drama

6 notes · View notes

lilyevanstan1325 · 4 months

Text

❤️ Still Falling For You ❤️

Chapter 2

Nora POV

“Miss Stark it's time to get up.Miss Stark?"

The gentle but authoritarian voice of mama Lupe wakes me up from my dream leaving a strange feeling on me.

I think I had a beautiful dream, like those dreams that you feel were beautiful but as soon as you open your eyes you cannot remember and you are left with a strange bitter taste in your mouth.

And that's exactly what's happening to me.

I know the dream was pleasant but I just can't remember what I was dreaming about...the only thing I remember is that there were a pair of deep blue eyes staring at me as if I were a Venus.

I roll on my stomach, moaning slightly irritated.

Now I'll just think about this dream and I'll just feel irritated because I don't remember it.

Mama Lupe opens the doors of the large window in my room, pulling back the heavy white and gold brocade curtains to let in the first rays of the sun.

Light that obviously beats heavily on my face forcing me to carry the pillow on my head.

"Get up miss.Your parents are already in the kitchen.You know they both want you downstairs so they can say hello before they leave so you have to hurry.I'm going to wake up your brother Peter”

The voice of my sweet nanny comes muffled because of the pillow that covers my head.

God I just don't want to get up and above all I absolutely don't want to see my parents.

“Tell them I'm sick.Or that I'm dead.I don't care and I'm sure they won't care either" I murmur annoyed.

I narrow my eyes trying to remember for the last time what or rather who I was dreaming, I try hard but suddenly the sunlight returns to hit me straight in the face, distracting me from my thoughts.

Mama Lupe pulled the pillow off my head and literally ripped the covers off me.

"Oh c’mon mamacita!" I grumble going back to lie down on my back and putting my arm over my face.

I peek under it and right next to my bed mama Lupe is watching me with a raised eyebrow and her hands on her hips, in her usual pose that indicates that she is about to scold me.

I pull my arm away from my face and stop for a moment to look at the woman in front of me.

Maria Lupe Ruiz, for all of us mama Lupe, has been working for the Stark family since time immemorial.

She comes from Spain, she arrived in America about fifty years ago and she was immediately hired by my grandmother Maria so that my father would have a figure next to him to help him in everyday life.

Grandma Maria and Grandpa Howard have always been too busy to take care of their only child so mama Lupe has become more than just a nanny for my father over time.

She was his one and only point of reference in his whole life, she became such an important part of his life that although my father was already grown up he never allowed Lupe to be fired so she transformed in the house maid.

Mama Lupe cooked and did laundry, cleaned the house and, if necessary, she also did small maintenance jobs.

She was the one running the cabin.

On the sudden death of my grandparents, my father became morbidly attached to Lupe and despite Tony being now a man of twenty she became his lovely nanny again.

She has been with him every single moment.

She was there holding his hand on the day of the Starks' funeral.

She was there when my father felt he couldn't make it.

She accompanied him to the altar when on a spring day twenty years ago he married Virginia Potts, whom he nicknamed Pepper, the daughter of a simple postman and an elementary school teacher.

She was there next to him when I was born and the same happened seven years ago with the birth of my brother Peter.

So mama Lupe is not just a maid, she is part of the family.

And although I am now grown up always makes me happy to receive her sweet attention.

She is the only one who has ever shown me a shred of love in this family.

Before Peter's birth I had no one but her, she was my only family.

“Eleanor, mi querida, they are your parents” Mama Lupe says softly.

I snort interrupting her.

She looks at me intently as she moves her time-stamped hands from her hips and slowly crosses her arms in front of her generous breasts.

"Don't look at me like this.You know” I tell her with a hard voice.

I get up and sit down while my feet touch the polished floor entirely made of refined Carrara marble.

Mama Lupe sighs but I cut her off even before she can speak.

“It's all like an endless loop mama.You've seen my grandparents do it and now he, he and my mom are doing it to me.To Peter” I hiss in anger.

This is really the only thing I will never be able to understand.

According to mama Lupe, my father suffered terribly from the lack of attention and love from his parents.

Yet here we are!

With him acting exactly like them.

And I can't get over it.

When I find myself fantasizing about my future I always hope that one day to my children I will be everything that Tony and Pepper Stark were not to me.

I could never make this torture pass to my flesh and blood.

Yet they succeed and do it with the total absence of guilt.

My father is always too busy between trials and meetings with wealthy men.

My mother, on the other hand, is always too busy chasing the latest fashion or going around clubs to have party with her friends.

Too busy living their lives to think about their children.

I've blamed myself for years, thinking it was my fault they didn't love me enough.

I blamed myself for never being enough…but then over time I realized that the fault was never mine and so all my pain turned to anger.

I grew up alone, with no love from people who are supposed to love me more than anything else in the world.

Yeah I have mama Lupe but basically I just wanted what all the other children had.

The love of mom and dad.

But if I have resigned myself over time, there is still another thing that tears my soul apart.

Seeing Peter that day after day realizes that his parents don't love him as they should.

Sometimes he asks me why mom and dad never spend time with us and why when they do it's always so cold.

And I punctually find myself forced to give him all the bullshit that mama Lupe has told me over the years.

They are too busy.

They do it for us.

When you grow up you will understand.

Yeah, I understand.

I understand that they don't love me.

Easy.

And lying to Peter is one of the things I hate most in the world but how can I tell a seven year old that mom and dad prefer money, success, power to him?

I've been there before him in all of this and it sucks.

You feel guilty about something you have no control over.

And that's why the first moment my eyes landed on my sweet little brother, I made a promise to myself.

Although I was just eleven, I promised myself that I would love him with all my heart and that I would do everything to make him feel loved.

Not to make him feel alone.

I want Peter when he grows up and looks back he will think I was loved, at least one member of my family loved me with all her heart.

And this thing I will never be able to say.

My parents don't love me.

I am just yet another trophy to show off.

The model daughter, with good grades in school.

I'm just that.

I'm just Tony Stark's heir.

Nothing more.

Mama Lupe's gaze softens and her deep black eyes stare at me full of sadness.

She knows the truth but in her heart she still hopes that deep inside the megalomaniac lawyer Stark is still hiding the little Anthony whom she loved and raised.

“You know what your parents are like, they may seem cold but they love you.In their own way but they love you” she whispers trying to reassure me with a smile.

I refrain from rolling my eyes, I don't want to offend the only person who has filled me with love in these almost eighteen years of life.

I nod.

I avoid speaking because at this moment only bad words would come out of my mouth.

Mama Lupe smiles at me again as she walks out of my room to Peter's.

I shake my head disconsolately.

My parents love me...what great bullshit.

The only thing my mother loves is money and maybe my father.

My father, on the other hand, only loves work, he loves the power that comes with it.

I get up and go to the bathroom in my room.

I pause for a moment in front of the mirror and trying to clear my mind of any bad vibes I start brushing my teeth.

As I look at my reflection in the mirror, a thought suddenly strikes me, causing a smile to appear on my face that goes from ear to ear.

Today is Thursday, which means I'm spending my lunch break with Barnes.

For the past two weeks we have seen each other in the same place and at the same time every Tuesday and Thursday.

I bring lunch and he helps me with math.

And I must admit that in two weeks I have learned more than I could ever hope for.

Of course it often happens that he has to repeat the same concept over and over again but he never loses patience with me and always with a smile on his lips he manages to help me.

And his eyes...

God his eyes are always so kind.

So beautiful.

I love looking at his profile while he's talking or eating or reading.

I sigh aware of what is happening to me.

I think I have a crush on James Barnes.

But I honestly can't figure out if I could interest him in this way.

Barnes never seems to have ever shown any interest in anyone so I have no idea how is his ideal type of girl.

For my part, I tried to flirt with him a little but without success because in addition to being denied in this, the maximum response I receive from him are weak and embarrassed smiles.

I have an idea that has been in my head for a few days but I have not the faintest idea how to tell him.

And above all, I don't know if it's a good idea after all.

I sigh shaking my head.

I rinse my face and then go back to the room.

I grab the clothes I prepared last night and put them on without thinking too much, then I put on my shoes and take a last look in the mirror.

For today I chose a cream-colored knit dress, long up to mid-calf with two deep side slits and at the foot I am wearing my beloved white Converse All Star.

I chose this dress because it enhances my soft shapes.

And above all, I chose it hoping to impress a certain person.

Oh my God am I really that pathetic?

I fix my hair with my hands one last time and then I grab my backpack and put in it the camera and the books that I will need for today's lessons, then I grab my brown teddy coat from the closet and get off ran up the stairs.

The rubber of my shoes creaks on the polished marble floors, attracting the attention of the person in front of me.

Right in the middle of the staircase is my little brother who has turned towards me, smiling at me radiantly.

He is lovely wrapped in his little school uniform.

My heart melts and I approach him to be able to take him in my arms.

His arms immediately wrap around my neck and his lips rest softly on my cheek.

"Morning Nora" he yawns placing his cheek on my shoulder, his sweet breath caressing the skin of my neck.

“Good morning to you too Pete.Are you still tired?"

Peter nods, snuggling even more into my arms.

And so with my backpack on my shoulder and my little brother tight in my arms I reach the kitchen.

In the center of the room there is a huge antique oak table.

My father is sitting at the head of the table in his usual super expensive suit reading The Wall Street Journal and sipping his strictly bitter coffee.

At his left side is my mother, already very elegant in her immaculate white suit, she is sitting elegantly with her legs crossed and at her feet a pair of exaggerated heels stand out.

I get dizzy with it just looking at them.

And she too, like my father, is intent on reading but her reading is nothing more than one of those stupid gossip magazines.

Mama Lupe is focused on sautéing something, something I suppose is our breakfast.

"Good morning" I murmur trying to keep a cheerful tone, I'm not going to let my parents ruin my mood, not this morning.

I'll see Barnes today, the rest doesn't matter.

My father looks up at me looking over the frame of his whimsical glasses.

I approach the table making Peter sit in his place and leaving a kiss between his tidy dark hair.

“Good morning Eleanor.Good morning Peter” my father replies with a half smile.

Peter turns to him, in his eyes you can see the desire to receive the attention of his father.

"Hi daddy" he chirps back but our father has already brought his attention back to his finance magazine.

Peter's smile fades from his face as he looks down at his hands resting on the table.

My jaw stiffens.

I swear I'm holding back with all my strength from yelling at these soulless parents.

As I make my way to my seat at the big table my mother deigns to take her gaze from the magazine she holds in her hands, placing it on me.

And in the time of a blink of her eye, her smile drops from her face.

“Oh Eleanor!How did you put on?" she asks me shaking her head disconsolately.

Peter turns his attention away from his hands to turn it to our mother.

Pepper very rarely turns to Peter.

Her main purpose is to make my life hell by belittling me every time she gets the chance.

I look down for a moment to observe my clothing.

Where was I wrong this time?

Yet I wear a dress, which I rarely do.

"What?" I ask disoriented.

"What are those?" she gasps almost in disgust, pointing to my feet.

I observe her by raising an eyebrow.

"They are shoes" I reply almost bored.

"Eleanor don't use sarcasm with your mother" my father scolds me without even taking his eyes off that damned newspaper.

I sit down aware that there will be yet another discussion this morning.

“It's not sarcasm.I simply answered her question" I answer by placing a fine linen napkin on my legs, I really wouldn't want a few drops of maple syrup to stain my dress forcing me to have to rack my brains to choose a new dress.

“You know what I mean Eleanor.Why don't you dress a little more appropriately?" my mother asks me shaking her head discouraged.

“Mom is school.It's not Milano Fashion Week" I mutter as I grab the crystal jug with the orange juice and pour a generous dose into my glass.

"I know it's school but you could dress more suited to your status"

Mama Lupe meanwhile approaches me putting three pancakes on my plate.

"No Lupe, take one off" orders my mother gesturing towards my plate.

Reluctantly I watch Mama Lupe take a pancake off my plate.

I love so much her pancakes.

Her mortified eyes turn to mine and I gently shake my head to let her know that everything is fine, that it is not her fault.

If there is one thing that haunts my mother more than fashion or plastic surgery, it is physical fitness.

Pepper is almost fifty years old and yet her physique looks like that of a twenty-five year old.

Every day she trains for about two hours with Juan, a 24-year-old personal trainer full of muscles and with a bright smile.

For my mother, appearing is all that matters.

I look down at my plate biting my tongue until I taste the taste of my own blood, I don't want to start a discussion that will eventually end with her humiliating me for the umpteenth time.

I feel Peter's eyes on me, even if he is a little boy he can perfectly perceive the tension that has arisen so to avoid him worrying more I turn my head towards him and blatantly roll my eyes making a face.

He chuckles, attracting the attention of my father who, after having drunk the last sip of coffee, places the newspaper on the table and stands up.

Peter follows his every move closely.

"This morning I have a business meeting near your school Peter, would you like if you come with me in the car today instead of taking the bus?"

At his words, my brother snaps like a spring and puts the last half pancake in his mouth, almost threatening to choke.

My father smiles.

A genuine smile that appears very rarely on his lips and the few times it happens is when Peter is involved.

Although he never lets himself go to great displays of affection, Peter seems to be the only one who manages to break through his heart.

My mother looks in disgust on Peter, her own son.

"What manners are these Peter?" she scolds him with a sharp look.

Peter swallows the pancake apologizing in a whisper but forgetting it shortly after because he is too excited at the idea of spending a few more moments with his dad.

Our father strokes his head and then holds out his hand, Peter grabs it with a toothy grin and so, holding hands, they leave the kitchen.

I smile happily.

Even though it's too late for me to love him or to be loved, I'm glad Peter has these little moments of happiness.

Mama Lupe says goodbye and she go upstairs to clean the rooms so the Ice Queen and I are left alone.

“You know I was serious earlier Eleanor” my mother suddenly says.

I stiffen.

I'm not ready to argue with her, I just want to get up and get out of this damn house.

I ignore her trying to finish my breakfast as quickly as possible.

“Don't ignore me Eleanor Maria”

I hate it when she uses my full name.

"I'm not ignoring you mom" I reply, finally looking into her eyes.

My mother is really beautiful.

She has long blond hair and skin that appears to be made of porcelain.

Her big blue eyes are capable of hypnotizing you.

But if outside her the features seem those of an angel, inside her resides a coldness and a wickedness that would make Satan envy.

She is always ready to judge everything and everyone from the top of her status.

God what a disgusting word.

As if money or power could define a person.

More money equals better person.

Fortunately, this is not the case, not for me.

"Eleanor you are almost eighteen years old and you are one of the most important heiresses in America, don't you think you should start bringing honor to your name?And maybe you could start looking around” she chirps in a sweet voice.

"Look around?" I ask confused.

"Yes sweetie.Start looking for someone who could support you in life”

Without being able to restrain myself I burst out laughing, I laugh until I have tears in my eyes.

“Mom, I'm almost eighteen, not thirty-eight.I don't think it's time” I reply shaking my head.

Instead she continues to look at me more serious than ever.

"I was your age when I met your father" she hisses almost offended.

I roll my eyes getting up and wearing my coat with quick gestures.

"I'll take care of the men when the time comes" I repeat walking towards the door.

“And when will the time be?When you are thirty and your physique will not something to be desired?"

I stop at her words.

She can't have said it seriously.

As if my highest aspiration is to be loved for my body or my bank account.

I remain motionless without being able to move, unable to speak.

Her heels click behind me until she reaches me and stops behind me.

I slowly turn towards her and we remain to observe each other for a few moments.

There is no loving gaze between us, no mother and daughter.

We look like two perfect strangers.

I often wonder why she had children.

Maybe she did it only because society imposed it on her.

“Eleanor behaving like this and with your stupid libertine ideas you will never do anything good in life.You are safe only because you are a Stark and you already have a future otherwise you would be just a little failed dreamer” she hisses furiously.

I feel the blood boil in my veins and my heart starts pumping furiously in my chest.

"Sorry?" I ask outside of myself giving her a chance to take back what she just said.

She smiles slightly shaking her head.

“Your dreams will get you nowhere.Your art, your photos will be of no use to you.Get your head right honey, becomes a great lawyer and marries a wealthy man.Only in this way can you feel truly fulfilled"

I look at her with eyes wide open with disbelief.

I stare at her perfect features of her looking for a small flaw, a small hint of some expression that can make me understand that she is not really serious.

She can't be.

I feel the tears stinging my eyes but I push them back.

I do what I do best now, suffocate the pain with anger.

“I am not you.And I don't want to be like you” I spit through my teeth.

Her gaze in response seethes with anger.

I hit her nerve.

To her ears it is a heresy that her own daughter does not want to look like the perfect Pepper Potts.

I turn my back and stride away from her.

I get into my car, throwing my backpack onto the seat next to me and, as I get out of gas I move away from this hell hole.

Bucky POV

I'm nervous.

As I stride towards the library my hands continue to sweat relentlessly and my heart does not want to stop its furious rush.

It's just a nice gesture.

Nothing more.

So why am I so fucking nervous?

Yet in these fortnight everything has been wonderfully perfect with Eleanor.

This is because she is wonderfully perfect.

Suggests my brain.

I sigh as I enter the large doors.

I show my school ID to the librarian and walk over to our table.

Our table.

This ours sounds far too wonderful to my ear.

Me, Eleanor and ours are certainly not words I would ever have thought of putting in the same sentence.

I'm the first to arrive so I sit and wait.

I look out of the large window and smile.

I've been doing it a lot lately.

I smile when I think of her.

I smile when I talk to her.

In this fortnight we got to know each other better, I discovered that we have many things in common.

We both love art and music.

I think back to our first meeting.

I'm sure she thought that I wasn't okay with my head, but besides observing her bewildered, I absolutely didn't know what else to do.

I mean Eleanor Stark was talking to me.

She was talking to me, James Barnes.

And in those few kind words and in her sweet smiles I realized how she really is a special person.

Her kindness is truly real, boundless.

A girl of her caliber would have been disgusted to sit next to me thinking twice...but not her.

She asked me to stay.

She asked me to meet again.

And now here we are.

Spending these few moments with her helps me to face my days at school with more strength.

They help me cope with my homecoming.

Walker and his friends continue to torment me while my father in turn continues to vent his anger on me for his miserable life and yet I continue to smile and wait for these few hours to the seventh to be able to see her again.

Footsteps behind me make my breathing quicken.

Finally she is here.

I turn to her smiling shyly but the smile dies on my lips and my eyes open wide in wonder.

I believe my jaw dropped on the floor at the moment.

I know I should compose myself but I just can't.

And as if that weren't enough to make the situation worse, my erection pushing furiously against the flap of my jeans.

I can usually keep my body's reactions at bay but today I feel my brain doesn't want to cooperate.

“Hi” Eleanor whispers as she approaches and as she usually takes her seat next to me.

“Hi” I stammer with my face on fire.

God today she is truly breathtakingly beautiful.

The dress she wears perfectly follows every curve of her, highlighting her narrow waist and generous breasts.

I look away embarrassed by her directing my attention towards my backpack, where I dip my hands in search of what I brought for her today.

I try to figure out how to get through this hour with her boobs that seem to literally scream at me to grab them in my hands.

Or how to resist the sight of her thighs appearing between the slits of her skirt with every little movement of her.

For a moment I let myself go to my most perverse fantasies.

I imagine kissing her, stroking her hips and slipping my hands under that skirt.

I imagine squeezing the tender flesh of her thighs between my fingers as my tongue continues to invade her mouth.

I imagine the sinful moan that comes out of her lips as my lips descend all the way down her neck and then get lost in her lustful breast.

"What are you looking for in there?" Eleanor chuckles tearing me away from my fantasies.

I jump like an idiot and turn to her.

Her crossed arms are resting on the table and her head rests on them.

She looks at me with an amused smile on her lips.

I stammer something indefinite.

Damn!

I clear my throat.

“I have a present for you” I mutter embarrassed as I pull a small plastic container out of my backpack.

She straightens up immediately with a strange expression on her face.

"A present?" she asks bewildered.

I scratch the back of my neck embarrassed.

"Yeah...I...I made it for you" I say hurriedly, handing her the container.

She grabs it, there is still an indecipherable expression on her face.

Her eyes are planted in mine, leaving me breathless.

With the light coming in through the windows this morning they look almost the same color as amber.

I feel like a prey bewitched by its predator, ready to succumb to its attack.

We simply remain observing ourselves, without moving.

Without speaking.

Then she frees me from the prison of her eyes and focuses on the small container she squeezes between her thin, delicate fingers.

I watch her as she lifts the lid and her eyes dilate.

Slowly her gaze returns to me.

"You did it?" she incredulous question.

I nod unable to find my voice.

Eleanor places the container on the table and with a trembling hand grabs the contents studying it carefully.

"Did you really do it?"

"I swear" I smile at her.

And she smiles at me in turn.

Eleanor observes the little tart in her hands and a moment later she brings it to her lips and takes a bite.

She sinks her teeth into the pastry firmly.

She closes her eyes and a moan of pure enjoyment escapes her lips.

And another discharge of pure excitement runs through me entirely making me swallow empty.

Eleanor Stark is standing here in front of me moaning with pleasure and I feel like I'm losing my mind.

I clench my hands in fists trying to curb my desire for her.

Eleanor just wants to be my friend, she feels sorry for me and she is just showing compassion towards another human being.

That's all.

I have to stop making mental films.

"Oh my God!Oh my..." she murmurs opening her eyes.

Hers tongue licks her upper lip trying to pick up the cream that escaped her bite.

With two fingers she grabs a raspberry and puts it in her mouth.

She continues to chew smiling at me.

"It's a shortcrust pastry tart with cocoa, with a coconut cream and berries" I explain ignoring the direction of my thoughts, I have to try to free my mind from certain thoughts.

“God Barnes you should open a bakery.You have a monstrous talent” she replies, taking another voracious bite of the tart.

She really seems to like it.

I shrug indifferently.

“I'm really serious Barnes.Have you ever thought about making it a profession?You know men who know how to cook are really sexy” she retorts with a sly look, winking at me.

I blush at her words.

Is she flirting with me by any chance?

Nah what nonsense!

Eleanor continues to look at me as if she really expected an answer from me.

I give up on the topic of sexy men, I do not understand if her was a simple statement or if she was flirting with me.

Yeah, you would like it man.

My cursed conscience laughs at me.

“I like to dabble in cooking but I don't think I'll ever do it as a job”

My father would kill me.

But her does not need to know this.

Cooking this very simple dessert was already an odyssey for me.

I had to ask Joe if I could use his oven and when he asked me why I wanted to make a dessert I just told him the truth.

That is, it was for the girl I liked.

But when he asked why I didn't do it in my house, I had to lie and tell him that the oven in my house was broken.

Joe wished me good luck and made me go up to his house, which is right above his shop.

To thank him, I made a tart for him too.

Eleanor has finished the whole tart and tastefully licks the tip of her index finger where a little cream was left.

My mind paints the image of her lips wrapped around something else...something else of mine.

I shake my head firmly.

That's enough or I won't even get to the next hour without cum in my underwear like a stupid idiot.

Eleanor smiles at me again.

“Thanks, you were really sweet.And your tart was really delicious”

She smiles beaming.

"It was a pleasure ma'am" I replied, bowing my head slightly forward.

We both burst out laughing.

“Ok ok!Come on help me with these damn homework.I don't understand anything about it” she sighs as she pulls her chair closer to mine.

Now our shoulders touch.

I grab my book from my backpack and after looking for the page with the topic that I will have to explain to her, I turn to her who, all concentrated, waits for me to speak.

But on her chin there is a little cream left which attracts my attention and makes me laugh.

"What?" she asks, looking around, unable to understand what amuses me.

“You…you have something on your face.Here” I tell her, pointing to her chin and trying to be as polite as possible.

I don't want her to think I'm laughing at her.

Eleanor's face turns red.

"Where?" she asks embarrassed making her hand wander over her chin but not finding the right spot.

I laugh amused.

"Here.Wait” I reply bringing my hand close to her face.

I grab her chin between forefinger and thumb and with the latter I rub the cream off.

I realize the gesture I made when Eleanor's hazel eyes widen and her cheeks turn even redder.

There is a storm of emotion in her eyes and for a moment, for a single moment, I feel as if she likes my touch.

My heart beats furiously and its echo reverberates deafeningly in my head.

In a completely instinctive gesture I trace the outline of her lips with the tip of my thumb.

As soon as my skin comes into contact with her soft lips, she open it and her warm breath touches the tip of my finger and my skin is literally on fire in that point.

The same fire that's burning in my eyes.

In her eyes.

I immediately retract my hand, murmuring an apology on my lips.

And rejecting everything I feel, everything I feel, I return to focus on the book in front of me.

Eleanor's eyes burn down my profile but I'm too cowardly to face her.

I ignore her hoping that she too will let go of whatever just happened between us.

Maybe you should kiss her and stop acting like a shit.

Or you could stop saying bullshit fucking conscience.

"So" I stammer clearing my throat.

"Tell me what you don't understand"

I hear Eleanor sigh but despite this I continue to keep my gaze fixed on the book.

"I don't understand how to do this calculation" she murmurs in a dejected voice.

"Now you have understood?" I ask after explaining the same thing to her four times.

Eleanor smiles beaming.

"Yes, I finally understood"

I remain enchanted to observe her while she smiles in that delightful way that I like so much.

“Sorry I'm a landslide” she giggles as she begins to pick up her things.

“Nah!You are not a landslide, you just need a few more explanations” I reply.

“Yeah…just a few…” she murmurs as she rolls her eyes.

We laugh together.

The embarrassment that was created before seems to have disappeared.

That's good.

I couldn't bear to lose her company just because of a foolish illusion of mine.

What a jerk I am.

How could I have thought that she could want something more from me?

I lean my back against the back of the chair and with my hands immersed in the pockets of the large sweatshirt I'm wearing I watch her put all her things in order.

God she is really beautiful.

I drink of every move of her like a thirsty man in the desert.

She bends forward to pick up her pencil case and my eye falls right on her neckline, below it I can see a strip of white lace.

And my cock for the umpteenth time makes me feel its presence strong and clear.

Yeah my friend, I know.

Eleanor stands up carrying a lock of hair behind her ear while she makes sure she has taken everything.

Finally I get up too and put all my things in bulk in my old and worn backpack.

We walk together but just before reaching the exit she freezes.

"Damn!" she mumbles, slapping her palm against her forehead.

"What happens?" I ask confused.

Maybe she realized we were about to leave the library together.

Usually she goes away first and after a few minutes I go away.

I always did it to leave her free to decide whether to show up with me or not and she never replied so it became like a tacit agreement between us.

But then she smiles.

“I promised Wanda to get her a science book.I have to go back.You go ahead.See you Tuesday"

"Are you sure?Do you need help?" I ask her eager to earn even just a few more short moments with her.

She shakes her head.

"I can take care of myself Barnes" she giggles, giving me a wink she go away from me.

I watch her until she disappears among the high shelves.

I remain impaled like a stupid until my feet move by themselves in the same direction from which she disappeared.

What the hell am I doing?

I don't know but I can't stop.

I look for her among the shelves until I see her.

Her beautiful profile stands out before my eyes.

She is on her tiptoes and she is pushing her arm as hard as she can to try and grab a book from the top shelf.

I smile and I approach her to help her and when I reach her side I raise my arm and grab the book.

"Luckily you knew how to take care of yourself" I mocked her jokingly.

Eleanor at first jumps from fear then turning to me and she hits my chest hard with her small hand.

“God Barnes!You scared the shit out of me!" she scolds me in a low voice.

I laugh with amusement at her funny expression.

And when my laughter is lost in the air around us, an awkward and tense silence returns overwhelmingly.

This part of the library is more isolated, there are no windows but only narrow and long corridors illuminated by some neon.

I hand her the book and she grabs it and hugs it to her chest.

Our gazes are chained to each other and we remain so, silent and motionless, studying each other.

Then for a split second her gaze falls to my lips.

I watch her as she tortured her lower lip with her teeth.

I can't do that.

I can't kiss her.

I am nobody.

I am just an outcast of this society devoted to money and consumerism.

I'm an ordinary nobody destined to have nothing good in this life.

I'm not a nice guy, I don't have a beautiful or sexy body, and I'm not a confident guy.

I allow my father to destroy my body and soul, the man who should help me face this life.

No girl will ever be attracted to a weak and pathetic guy like me.

I am nothing.

And she is Eleanor Stark.

She could have it all.

She has the world at her feet.

Why should she ever settle for someone like me?

I take a step back and for the second time I break our eye contact.

"I have to go Eleanor" I murmur with my eyes down.

Right now I can't even look into her eyes.

"James" a strangled whisper and a deafening thud.

The science book lies on the floor as Eleanor's arms are tied around my neck and her lips are pressed to mine.

She presses them hard as she lifts herself up onto her toes.

Her eyes are closed while mine are wide open in shock and my arms hang lifeless along my body.

Eleanor is kissing me.

Eleanor Stark is kissing me.

She wanted it.

This is not a fantasy.

This is reality and in this reality she chose to kiss me.

And now it is my turn, now or never.

And so I let myself go.

I raise my arms and with a trembling hand I grab her hips.

A shiver shakes her and her lips press even more forcefully against mine.

In response to her enthusiasm I begin to kiss her too.

Our lips brush, gently rubbing each other and with my heart beating so hard that I think it can be heard from miles away I push myself further.

I part my lips and with the tip of my tongue I caress her lips, full and soft.

Eleanor moans opening her lips in turn and a moment later my tongue is in her mouth.

I have no idea what to do, I've never kissed a girl, so I let myself be guided by my instincts.

I bring my body close to hers by pressing her against the shelf behind her, a moan escapes from her lips and I don't know if it's for surprise or for pleasure but that's enough for me to unleash the sleeping beast inside me.

I let myself go completely to the kiss.

My tongue caresses Eleanor's with passion, I move it together with her in an unknown but pleasant dance.

Much more than pleasant.

In the heat of the moment I push my hips towards her, rubbing it against her abdomen ripping out of her another moan.

Her hands caress my neck and then move towards my chest where they forcefully claw my sweatshirt.

My head is spinning as my breath gets shorter and shorter.

I move my hands from her hips and slowly with my fingertips I caress her thighs through the slits in her skirt and then I go up to her arms, I stroke them up and down and then I bring my hands to her face.

I wrap my finger around her beautiful face and as I continue to kiss her I gently rub my thumbs against her delicate skin.

Her perfume invades my nostrils.

My head.

My heart.

It is a strong fragrance, delicate like flowers and strong like wood.

Oriental.

I feel overwhelmed.

As if I flew up to the sun and after getting burned I fell down at a speed that leaves no alternative but crashing to the ground.

And even if you already know it's going to hurt like hell, you'll want to do it again.

And again.

A pleasant torture that worth every drop of blood.

We are now short of oxygen and we just have to separate.

We slowly move away only a few inches.

I slowly open my eyes.

Her's are still closed so I take this opportunity to kiss her again.

Gently and delicately I kissing her slowly and Eleanor lets herself be guided by me, it is as if she were clay in my hands.

She too grabs my face in her hands.

Now her fingers too slowly caress my cheekbones.

Ours lips touch, ours hands study new horizons.

The world around us seems to have disappeared, it's just me and her.

James and Eleanor.

The only sound around us is the crazy beating of our hearts.

Eleanor opens her eyes again.

For a moment there is only silence and a deep sense of fear makes room in me.

What if she pushes me away?

What if this kiss meant nothing to her?

What if she regrets it?

But then one thing happens.

Eleanor smiles at me.

Her hands come off my face to tie around my waist and her head rests on my chest.

She is hugging me and I feel that in this exact moment we are more intimate than when we were kissing.

I too hold her in my arms, sinking my face into her soft and scented hair.

After a few seconds of this moment of bliss a serene and amused voice resounds behind us.

“Oh Nora!Really?"

Eleanor stiffens and I immediately pull my arms away from her body, throwing my hands up in the air as if giving up.

I turn my head in the direction of that voice.

Behind me with a sly smile on his lips is Pietro Maximoff.

I continue to keep my arms raised as Eleanor lifts her face in search of my gaze without ever loosening her grip on my body.

"Everything is fine.He's a friend” she murmurs and then sinks her face back into my chest.

I embrace her again.

If before I thought that my heart could come out of my chest now I'm afraid it could just explode.

She did not dodge me, she continues to hug me regardless of the fact that we have just caught together.

She is not ashamed of me.

Pietro raises an eyebrow as he crosses his arms across his chest.

“Hey Wanda come here!You will not believe your eyes" chuckles Pietro, drawing the attention of his sister.

“Oh P!Shut the fuck up!” Eleanor chuckles raising her head to focus her gaze on her friend.

Pietro approaches, holding out his hand to me.

“How you doin', dude?I am Pietro” he introduces himself smiling at me.

I don't know if this is really happening or if in a few minutes I'll wake up sweaty and panting in my bedroom.

Eleanor intercepts my bewildered gaze and as soon as our gazes meet she smiles at me encouragingly.

I move my gaze to Pietro's hand and then to his face.

There is no mockery or malice in his eyes, he just smiles at me in a friendly way.

And then I raise my hand and squeeze his.

“Hi, I'm James.Nice to meet you”

Pietro laughs.

“Oh man, the pleasure is mine!You know I did not believe that there was a boy in the world capable of catching the attention of our Nora" he replies and then calls her sister again.

"Wanda!" he exclaims and the sound of her footsteps gets closer and closer.

"Yeah!I'm coming!Stop screaming"

Her voice reaches us from around the corner.

"Did you find Nor..."

Her question dies on her lips as soon as she notices the small crowd in front of her eyes.

Her big blue eyes are at first confused then as she studies our positions they move from confusion to curiosity.

Yeah, I can understand her.

There is her best friend hugging the strange boy from school and that boy is wrapping her shoulders with his arm.

First she takes a look at her brother Pietro who continues to smile slyly then her attention is all to us.

"What the hell?" she asks advancing towards us.

Eleanor loosens our embrace but immediately her hand looks for mine and once she finds it I let our fingers intertwine.

Wanda captures our every movement with her attentive and crystalline gaze and then focuses her clear gaze on that of her best friend.

“Wanda this is James.James she is Wanda” introduces Eleanor to us without ever taking his eyes off those of her childhood friend.

And if earlier her reaction to Pietro's arrival had been serene, now I can feel all her tension through our interlocked hands.

Even if she continues to smile, her eyes seem anxious.

I think she cares about Wanda's judgment more than she imagined.

Wanda shakes her head and walks forward smiling.

“And you said you came here to do your math homework.Liar” Wanda teases her.

"It's actually the truth" Eleanor grumbles as she gets a roll of eyes from her friend.

Wanda joins us standing right in front of me.

"Hi James" she greets me, scrutinizing me intently, as if she were trying to read my mind.

I move slightly uncomfortably greeting her in turn with a faint “Hi”.

I'm still too stunned by the latest events.

A lot is happening and all too fast.

Pietro at my side gives me a playful shoulder with a wink.

"She just wants to intimidate you" he whispers to me, indicating her sister with a nod of his head.

"I don't know whether to kick you for not saying anything to me or be happy because you can't stop smiling"

Wanda's words attract my attention again.

Eleanor beside me rolls her eyes and never stops smiling.

“As much as I love gossip, I really have to run away.Coach Winkler doesn't particularly like latecomers” murmurs Pietro, patting me on the back.

The simplicity with which Pietro is treating me as if he has always known me is incredible.

As if I were a friend of him.

“What are you doing Wanda?Are you skipping the lesson?" asks Pietro to her twin.

"Obvious!Eleanor and I have a lot to talk about.That's true, my dear best friend?" Wanda chirps, smiling slyly.

“But I would have math class now.I've studied a lot, I don't want to miss it” complains Eleanor but immediately she falls silent at Wanda's skeptical gaze.

"Yeah, study...sure" she replies grabbing her free hand and pulling Eleanor towards her.

“Say hello to your James, Nora” she tells her as she continues to pull her until our hands separate.

Your James.

I blush.

“Ok ok!You won!" Eleanor exclaims.

"Hi James.See you soon” she whispers.

Her uncertain gaze, however, seems to want to tell me more.

"See you soon" I answer her smiling weakly.

Now the future is truly a frightening unknown.

What will happen between us now?

What does everything that happened mean?

Eleanor turns her back to me and takes a few steps forward flanked by Wanda but she immediately stops.

"Oh fuck!" she exclaim.

I watch her as she turns back to me and she joins me, stopping just a few steps away from me.

"Listen...do you want to go out with me tomorrow night?" she asks me straight away.

Her face is on fire and I can't help but find her adorable.

"Yeah" I whisper embarrassed not so much by her proposal, I am totally incredulous about this, but by the fact that we have an audience that witnesses all of this and she doesn't seem to care at all.

Eleanor reaches out her hand in front of me.

I look at her without understanding.

"Give me your phone" she tells me answering my silent question.

I hand her the phone without hesitation.

God!Is there anything I wouldn't do for her?

She grabs it and quickly types something, then she hands it back to me.

“Now you have my number.We'll talk later to agree, okay?"

"Sure" I reply simply stammering, the hands that holding the phone tremble uncontrollably.

Then she smiles and after leaving me a kiss on my cheek she turns her back to me and she walks away giggling with Wanda.

"Women.Whoever understands them is a genius” murmured Pietro, shaking his head.

I nod to agree with him.

"What lesson do you have now?" Pietro asks me.

I look away from where Eleanor disappeared from, turning my attention to the boy next to me.

His hair is so blond that it almost looks like silver threads.

"Art" I reply.

"Then we go to the same side" says Peter, patting me on the back.

"Come on let's go" he encourages me to follow him and I do, I pick up my backpack from the floor and walk beside him.

We walk in silence but it is not an awkward silence.

"So...you and Nora, huh?" he chuckles amused running a hand through his hair.

"Yeah...I confess that even I can't get over it" I murmur confused.

What the hell does Eleanor find interesting about me?

Pietro answers me something but I am not able to understand what he is saying because in front of me, wrapped in his jacket, green and silver as the colors of the school, Walker is advancing with his stupid friends.

I look down at the floor hoping he will let me go.

"Hey sissy" he yells at me rudely as soon as he notices my presence.

I ignore him but Pietro next to me doesn't seem to be of the same opinion as me.

"Stop it Walker" he warns as we advance towards them.

Walker slows to a stop.

"Oh sorry!I didn't know the fag was your friend” he laughs followed by everyone else.

Pietro stops grabbing me by the arm and forcing me to stop too.

"Forget it" I whisper faintly.

I don't want Pietro to antagonize someone like Walker because of me.

“Yeah!He's my friend.Any problems?" Pietro asks him, challenging him to continue.

Walker exchanges a couple of amused glances with his friends then turns back to Pietro.

“Oh no dude.No problem.If you like to be seen around with that loser, that's fine by me” he retorts, looking at me as if I were garbage.

His empty, soulless eyes focus on me as if he wanted to do nothing but destroy me.

Pietro laughs, catching everyone a little off guard.

Me too.

"See Walker if I liked being seen around with losers right now I would be part of your team" he replies with a shrug.

At the words of him Walker's face is transfigured, he no longer has the air of a braggart now.

His eyes ooze anger.

Hate.

His friend Lemar, his trusted right hand man, urges him to let go.

"Let's go away John"

"Yes, go away John" repeats Peter then turns his back on him and continues on his journey.

I stand there, Walker's eyes staring at me with a single promise.

As soon as he catches me alone he will have his revenge.

I turn quickly and reach Pietro.

As soon Walker is no longer visible to our eyes, Pietro stops giving me a blow on the chest.

“Dude!Why the hell do you get treated like this?" he asks me.

He looks genuinely pissed off.

I look away from his face staring at somewhere in front of me.

"Have you seen him?He is twice the size of me!What the hell am I supposed to do?"

What does he thinks I enjoy being humiliated and beaten up?

“He's bigger than me too but he's just a jerk.You should learn to be respected”

His words drive me crazy.

All the anger inside me suddenly erupts.

“Do you think I don't know?You think I like being treated like I'm human waste, huh?I am not you Pietro, I am not brave and sure of myself.I'm just a fucking coward!" I hiss at him.

But then I immediately realize that I'm mistreating a person who is basically just trying to help me.

Perhaps the only one that has ever done.

I take a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to take it out on you" I apologize to him, rubbing my face in my hands and then bringing them through my hair.

"It's okay" he reassures me waving a hand in front of my face.

"But you really shouldn't allow that idiot to treat you like that" adds Pietro, softening his gaze.

I nod, sighing wearily.

“Ok I run away or the coach will kill me.See you dude!" so saying he pats me on the back and runs off.

"See you soon" I now whisper to the deserted corridor.

I take a couple of deep breaths and settling my backpack on my shoulder I enter the classroom.

Thank goodness the professor has not yet arrived so I hurry to get to my seat in the back row, I sit down and a trembling breath leaves my lips and despite the encounter-clash with Walker I find myself smiling again.

Eleanor kissed me and we have a date tomorrow night.

With a trembling hand I grab my old smartphone from my trouser pocket and scroll through the address book.

I smile again like an idiot at the sight of her contact, she has memorized it under the name Nora.

The professor makes his entrance and the whole class falls silent so that the lesson can begin.

But no matter how hard I try today I just can't understand a single word…my mind is too busy retracing every single moment I spent with Eleanor.

All I do is think of her lips on mine, of the softness of her hips under my greedy fingers.

The feel of her warm body pressed against mine.

I can still feel her perfume poison my soul and cloud my senses.

She wasn't ashamed to be seen with me.

She hugged me in front of her friends, she introduced me to them.

She asked me for a date in front of her two best friends.

This must mean something, isn't it?

I am excited and terrified at the same time at the idea of spending more time with her.

This date could be the turning point in my pathetic life.

Finally Eleanor has noticed me and I will do anything to keep her close.

Please comment, share and rate ❤️

Taglist

🔥 Masterlist 🔥

@deansapplepie

#marvel #sebastianstan #bucky barnes #bucky #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction recommendation #bucky barnes x oc #bucky x oc #bucky fanfic #sebastian stan fanfiction #sebastian stan #bucky barnes fanfiction #james barnes #winter soldier #winter soldier fanfiction #stillfallingforyou

5 notes · View notes