#but he hasnt started yet and is showering before starting too so its gonna be at least 2 hours before i can have dinner

[imqueenloki]

pairing: angry dominant peter parker x fem!reader

word count: 1882

warning: chocking and swearing

authors note: i'm really proud of this :)

my pov:its been 6 months since dad moved the avengers up-state, its been fun for the most part although since peter moved in a couple weeks back its been a nightmare

my pov:

its been 6 months since dad moved the avengers up-state, its been fun for the most part although since peter moved in a couple weeks back its been a nightmare. me and peter never really have rlly gotten along, he's just so... ugh. he's always making a racket, never cleaning up after himself and dont even get me started on the time i found his web juice, whatever the fuck it is on my towel. the only reason i put up with him is bc dad makes me bc he happens to see potential in the kid. although i can say one good thing about him, he is extremly good looking but god i will never ever tell anyone that.

peters pov:

moving in with mr. stark and the avengers has been a dream come true. i finally feel like i am one of them! recently, i met mr. starks daughter, y/n, i think her name was. we dont really speak much, she isnt the nicest person in the house, shes always moaning at me and calling me a slob, and gosh you dont even want to hear the mouthful i got off her when i was testing my new web shooters, never again is all i can say.

storyline:

the house was silent, it was around 9:00pm and not a single word, so quiet you could hear a penny drop. everyone was sat downstairs playing a not so friendly game of monopoly, although peter was no where to be found.

tony: where the darn hell is parker?

y/n: *shrugs* god knows... *sighs* oh well, whos turn was it?

tony simply shook his head and sat down, pulling his phone out. he decided to message peter as he was growing concern. y/n looks over at her dad and can see the worry on his face and put her hand on his shoulder.

*CRASH*

tony: what the hell was that?!

everyone rushed into the kitchen when we hear the sound. too nobodys suprise it was peter crashing through the window. there was glass everywhere and he even had some shards in his face. peters suit was completly messed up.

y/n: what the fuck parker!

tony: where have you been! actually let me reword that, what the hell happened!

peter: im sorry mr. stark, i was just trying to do some training with my new web modes and well... one of the modes didnt go where i shot it and well.. here i am.

tony: *sighs* cap, get someone to clean this up will you, and y/n help parker clean up?

y/n: why? this wasnt my doing!

tony: do you want that new suit or not!?

my pov:

since i turned 18 last year, my dad has been working on a new suit for me. when i was little he never really gave me a choice to join the avengers or not, let alone barely even mentioning it. i dont have a problem with joining its just i find it a little soon, you know? and yes im completly aware that parker is 18 and an avenger but thats exacly why he is in this situation, he just isnt ready in my opinion. the more i have put thought into becoming the newest avenger i grow more and more excited, although my opinion on it hasnt changed. my dad is aware of this which is why he uses my new suit as a black mail card.

*back to storyline*

y/n lets out an angry sigh while running her tounge along her teeth, she simply looks peter up and down and shrugs her head to one side signaling him to follow. you take him to your bathroom and grab a damp towel, while parker sits on the counter. you begin to wipe blood off of his cheek.

peter: *hisses in pain*

y/n: oh dont be a wimp i though you had super strength?

peter: still hurts!

yn: shush *grabs her tweezers and removes the shards of glass from his face*

peter: *rolls his eyes and pushes you away* i dont need ur help, im fine.

you become shocked by the small bit of dominance that he showed, and little did he know you liked it. you had never seen the angry side of parker before, it kinda turned you on alittle bit.

y/n: sit the fuck down, my dad told me to help you so thats what the fuck i intend to do.

peter: *goes to grab the towel from your hand but grabs your wrists instead and brings you closer*

you interlocked eyes. the sound of him panting in pain but anger filled the room. you got lost in his eyes as a puddle began to form inbetween your legs, you knew what was happening but little to your surprise you liked it, and by the fact he hasnt let go or stopped looking at you, you can tell he does too.

my pov:

parker still hadnt taken his eyes off of me.

y/n: you gonna let go orrrr?

although i was enjoying the tense moment, i couldnt let him know that, therefore i had to say something. he finally let go of my wrist and jumped off the counter. you could see the anger in his face, but why?

y/n: whats up with ur face?

peter: really? whats up with my face? im sick and tired of being treated like a kid!

y/n: you just crashed through a window, you really expect my dad to trust you fully right about now? *sighs* you should take a shower, you smell like shit.

peter nods and begins to take off his shirt. 'wow not in he.. *mumbles* damn' i say as he throws his shirt down, you did not expect him to have a body like that. you can tell he was agressive. he had slashes down his chest, they looked really painful. i decided to walk up to him and run my hand just under one of the cuts as he looks down at me still heavily breathing. he hissed at me in pain. he lifted my head up by my chin and kissed me. i pulled back and just looked at him. i craved more, so more is what i got.

he picked me up and as i wrapped my legs around his waist he started to kiss me even harder. he sat me on top of the counter and started to remove my shirt. he kissed my neck leaving kickeys all the way around it, minor moans into his ears drove him crazy. he unbuckled my bra and threw it onto the ground along with his belt. i reached into his boxers and began rubbing his member. he was massive, 10 inches, maybe even 11. groans of pleasure filled the room which made me go even faster. 'fuck y/n' he said.

he wrapped his hand aroud my throat and began kissing me once again. the puddle in my pants had become the ocean. i dont know what it was in that moment that made me gag for him. i wanted him, i needed him and then... i had him.

i jumped down off of the counter and got onto my knees exposing his member. it was just as big as it felt. i licked the tip, teasing him as i looked up to see him looking down on me, with his hand all wrapped in my hair. i took all that i could into my mouth still pumping where i couldnt reach. his groans go even louder as he tilted his head back in pleasure. i could feel his member throbing in my mouth. he pushed my head all the way down, deep throating him, my eyes filled with tears and mascara running down my face. he kept me there for a few seconds and released his load into my throat then releasing my head. 'swallow it' he said. i nodded and did as i was told.

he demanded for me to stand up, as i did so he pushed me into the shower and turned it on. he had no remorse for anything he was doing but i was completely into it. he bent me over, with my hand on the wall and smacked my ass. i let out a little wimper from the impact of the smack. 'i wanna hear your moans, you hear me?!' he said in a demanding tone 'yes parker' i replied. i had clearly replied in the wrong was since he smacked my ass even haarder than the first time and slammed his member into me without warning 'thats not my name you slut' he groaned. he slammed his dick in and out of me making me scream out in pleasure. cuss words, moans and the word daddy filled the room as peter fucked me senselessly. 'im g-gonna c-cum' i said between moans. peter pushed my head down and demaned me to hold it.

he pulled out of me, and lifted me onto his shoulders face forward with my pussy in his face. he began eating me out... oh my god what that mouth could do. he layed me down on the shower floor and flipped me over into the doggy position and slammed into me yet again. 'fuck your so tight baby' he groaned pumping in and out of me. he made me feel so good it was diificult not to let out a moan or two. he pushed my head down once again and restrained my arms behind me using them to help him go deeper. i wasnt used to such dominance but i was into it, especially not from peter. 'im g-gonna cum' i said yet again and he agreed. the knot in my sotmach became unbearable, i came all over his member and a few moments later he let out his load inside of me which i didnt mind as i had the contraceptive implant. i attempted to stand up but instantly fell back to the floor. peter was the first person to make me cum let alone make me unable to walk after sex. he picked me up and put me on the counter. 'im sorry for the dominance, it kind of just takes over' he said as his face grew into a frown. i lifted his head back up and simply told him i loved it and that he was the first to make me cum and temporaily paralytic which made his face glow.

tony: y/n! have you cleaned him up yet?!

y/n: omg my dad! i completely forgot!

we quickly put out clothes back on and thankfully we did it in the shower meaning he was now clean.

y/n: yes dad!

peter: yes mr. stark!

me and peter let out a giggle as we had gotten away with nobody hearing a thing. peter pecked my lips and unlocked the door. my feelings towards peter had changed ever since.

#avengers #writing #writers on tumblr #wattpad #spider man #short story #reading #peter parker #spiderman smut #tony stark #marvel

[heleizition]

How Alfred interact with his shifter babies? Where is Barbara in all of this? Is she a shifter or human? Also, I want to know more about Tim's parents... How was they and how Tim ended up with batfamily?

ok hold on . .. i need a second . .. im thinking about alfred holding like, baby panther dick in hi arms n smilng softly,,, jst . .. give me a moment . ..... like ... hes cooking n hyerna jason who’s starting to grow jst sits beside him n tucks his head on the counter n looks at alfred like feed me and alfred is so so fond of his grandsons yk,,, of his family,,,, cries

OK SO beside that tim shifts from cat to human the first time with alfred,,, hes a safe adult in his eyes and he trusts him and its a trust alfred hasnt and wont ever betray. cass just likes to sit on his shoulder while he has tea,,, he makes her a cup and she flies over to drink when she feels like it but mostly she’s chilling. steph usually runs around and tries to pick things up to “help” alfred and he gives her lil pets,,,, duke usually feels like in the way when hes shifted and alfred is cleaning up or working around him so he usually shift back and helps and it makes alfred smile a lot even after he tries to shoo duke away bc thats His Job yk,,, duke still helps sefooefshofse

OK UM i admit i did not think of babs bc she always slips from my mind,,,, i dont have a big connection to her character,,,, im not sure if she’s a shifter yet i gotta think but i kinda feel  ,,, fox for her,,,,, if u have other suggestions im open ? i dont know much about her character sadly,,,,

OK SO under the cut is tim’s story n how he met and ended up w the bat, big tw for animal (shifter) abuse and child abuse, starvation, abandonment, umm mutilation & description of injury

tim first turned into a cat (to his parents knowledge) when he was about 4 or 5. he’d been already introduced to the world but as he was a small child they hadn’t really been showing him around everywhere so only a handful of people knew/remembered small boy tim. janet has a particular hate toward that branch in her family that can shift so she’s really jst. hating her son having it and she immediately just. decides that she just doesnt want to see him. so jack and her just start locking him in a tiny cat cage, which prevent him from turning back into a boy, feed him catfood when they remember to feed him. at some point they get him declawed (which gives him terribly vivid nightmares of human him getting his fingers torned off of his hand) and when they leave they give him a tight collar while leaving him out of the cage which prevnts him from shifting back bc the collar would just go through tim’s throat if he shifted to human.

so tim drake ends up . not existing. everyone forgets the drakes had a son, tim very rarely gets to be in human shape (which hurts at some point), and when he does his parents usually yell at him and making him feel very unwanted, going as far as throwing things at him until he jst, shifts back and makes himself as small and forgotten as possible. he stopped going to school early, but he still taught himself to read (u gotta do smth when ur stuck as a cat for years) and went through lots of his parents books (that were on bottoms shelfs bc its hard to put the books back in the right shelves while in cat form and he gets yelled at enough as it is just for existing).

so he’s like 10, and his parents have been gone for a while . and he’s rly not doing good. he’s not rly clinging to life. he’s underfed. everything hurts. his brain isn’t really reactive anymore. and hes on the wall between the drakes and the wayne’s estate dick and jason are in the garden, playing around, and he just. falls asleep. passes out from exhaustion and his body kind of giving up on him.

they hear him or see him, idk, they find him and jason shifts back, holding the small kitten in his arms and he runs inside, n they take care of him, the adress on the collar said he’s from next door,,, at this point they dont know he’s a shifter,, but when he wakes up tim’s all warm and tucked against a warm body (dick) and jason is beside them petting him gently and the second tim is awake he’s tense and trying to get away bc humans have done nothing but hurt him at this point yk,, he’s barely ever met anyone,,, he sticks to the drake’s house bc he’s terrified they’ll know if he goes somewhere else

(altho deep down he thinks they’d be happy if they came home to an empty house)

and when he wakes up. thats when dick n jay understand he’s not just a cat, he’s a shifter, n jason holds him in place to remove the collar bc he *knows* he cant possibly be able to shift to human with it,,, but even without it tim doesnt shift back, hes jst, scared cat,,,,

(”hey, it’s ok, we’re like you” jason says, in the most gentle voice dick’s ever heard him use. there is a moment of silence, where the kitten blinks, and then the familiar noise of flesh rearranging itself while jason shifts into his hyena form. he’s careful to keep his distance, laying on his stomach to make himself smaller - which helps, but not by much as he’s still huge compared to the little shifter in front of them. dick knows the lines of tension and those of exhaustion in their muscles, and remembers how they didn’t even stir when jason had carried them inside. he shifts. 

“i’m gonna get you some food, okay ?” he levels his tone with his brothers. “we should have some fruits around, upstairs. fish maybe ? if you’d like ? or something else.” he smiles that smiles only he knows how to smile. “or maybe you’d like to pick yourself ?”

the little cat manages to make themselves smaller.)

they eventually manage to feed him and hydrate him, and dick tells alfred and bruce about the little shifter while jason keeps an eye on him,,, bruce connect the drake and tim shaped dots. he remembers janet and jack rejecting a gala invitation a while back bc she had recently delivered, only he’d never seen the kid.

tim only lets jason and dick close a first, bc they’re younger, bc they’re shifters, and then alfred bc alfred always brings him food on a plate and with a fork and knife like he’s going to use them as a human. he talks to tim and pets him gently once tim allows it,,, he’s a safe adult.

bruce scares him a lot, even if he’s gentle and he’s a good dad. he’s bigger than jack has ever been, and he knows he could hurt him. he just scares him a lot. he has too much authority, too much presence.

tim shifts back into a human on is seventh day at the manor, while alfred sits with him in a little room tim had hid in. he’s a very small boy and he cries out in pain when he shifts, but alfred puts a hand on his cheek and just smiles

(”hello, my boy”)

tim is very quiet, takes a shower and shifts back before anyone else can see him,,, but slowly he lets it happen around the others. one time dick n jay wake up from a nap session to a little boy suggled between them,,, there is a lot of hurt and pain from jason bc he’s been that little boy, hurt and scared and in pain, and it brings back a lot of sad things,,,

eventually he lets himself shift into bruce’s arms on the second week and he cries a lot n bruce tells him he figured out he’s the drake’s son, and jst, h, he adopts

#ask me #shifter au #PLS READ THE TW #wandersmoklight

[starkercrossedlovers]

Call Me, Maybe? 📞

This is part two of the sex line fic Hotline Bling and I hope you all enjoy!!

————————

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe

Peter’s had the song stuck in his head for days, humming it under his breath in class, as he patrols, singing off key and loud in the shower...it’s silly, but he can’t stop.

It doesn’t help that he’s made it the ringtone for Tony, and when he’s not in class, it blares every time the older man calls or texts.

Which is a lot.

Because they sext and text and call each other...all. The. Time.

He swerves and dodges a blast from a robot seemingly intent on homicide and hisses when one of its lasers slices through his suit and into his ribs.

He should be getting ready to meet Tony, but no, some maniacal asshole had to go and ruin his date. He’s already sent Tony a text that he’s not going to make it—last minute paper to finish!—but he’s hoping that if he can just—

The robot tangles in the webs he shoots and then blasts it with an EMP, grinning in delight when it collapses to the pavement below.

He webs it down more securely until SHIELD arrives and then swings away, back to the apartment. It’s only when he’s in the shower that the wound on his side makes itself known again and he hisses as blood streams down the drain. His fingers shake as he wraps a bandage around his torso after the shower, wincing at the ache in his side.

He can’t go meet Tony like this...

Sighing, he pulls on soft sweatpants and a T-shirt, toweling off his hair as he heads for his desk.

He does actually have a paper to work on...even if he’d much rather be somewhere else...with someone else.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe

He grins when he sees his phone light up with a new text from Tony.

Tony: hey baby, I know you gotta paper to write, just wanted to say I miss that pretty face

He melts.

Snaps a pic of him, post shower, pink cheeked and shirt slipping off one shoulder and sends it.

He doesn’t have to wait long.

Tony: oh baby...ur so pretty...wish I was there to mess you up, get you all dirty

Peter: me too...I’ll call you when I’m done?

Tony: yes plz baby 😘😘😘

Peter grins and sets the phone aside, determined to focus and get this paper done.

Then he can play.

——————————

When he’d first met Tony at the coffee shop two weeks ago he’d kinda expected to be taken somewhere private and fucked senseless. Instead, Tony had bought them coffee and guided him to a corner table and they had talked...for hours.

He’d found out the older man is a mechanic and former race car driver, with a penchant for sex line work on the side. He’d explained that he likes the work; he’s always enjoyed making his partners cum and being a sort of blank canvas for other’s needs is something he finds enjoyable.

Clad in a flannel button down with a Black Sabbath T-shirt underneath, jeans that clung to his thighs, and combat boots, he was...entirely unexpected.

They talked mechanics and engineering, biochemistry and history, social justice and morality and before Peter had realized it, his stomach was demanding food. When he tried to apologize, Tony just laughed and guided him out to his car—a 75 Aston Martin Vantage, cherry red with gold accents—and took him to dinner.

He finds out that Tony’s 45, single, divorced with no kids, and co-owner of Stark Industries with his ex wife, Pepper Potts. Peter can barely believe he’s sitting with a man named in the top 100 wealthiest people in the world eating burgers from some hole in the wall diner, but yea, it’s real.

When he dropped him off after that first date he asked if he could kiss him and then proceeded to do so until Peter was hard and aching, clinging to the older man and gasping his name, whispering a plea that Tony had struggled to refuse. He sent Peter inside and called him minutes after he got home, listened to him jerk off and beg for Tony, cuming alongside him just a few short minutes later.

They’ve seen each other nearly every day since then, talked just about every night, texted constantly, and still, Tony hasn’t fucked him yet. This weekend though, he’s going to make it happen. Aunt May is going to Chicago for a conference and he’s assured her he’ll be fine, nudged her out the door and then waited ten minutes to text Tony.

Peter: home alone this weekend, come over?

He bites his lip, pacing as he waits for a response and then jolts when his phone starts playing that familiar ring tone.

Tony: have a few more meetings at SI 8 ok?

Peter: yes!

Tony: see you later sweetheart 😘

Peter sighs, it’s noon, which means he has to wait all day for Tony. It’s an in service day so he’s home alone, with nothing to do. A grin creeps over his face and he runs to his room, shedding clothing until he’s in his boxers.

Screw homework, he’s going to tease Tony till he comes over early and fucks him.

He plays with his nipples until they’re sore and achy, chest flushed pink with desire and hair messy from writhing on his bed. He snaps a pic and sends it—missing you—he captions it.

He doesn’t have to wait long.

Tony: baby...Jesus...u look so good

Peter shoves a hand into his boxers and takes another pic so Tony can see. Wish you were here he sends along with it.

Tony: Christ kid...trying to focus on this budget mtg and that’s not helping

Peter grins and records a small video of his hand stroking his cock inside his boxers, loops it into a gif and sends it.

Tony: fuck...baby boy, ur making daddy hard. Gonna get in trouble if u can’t behave

Peter records another short video and allows himself to gasp and moan, need you daddy he whispers, grinning as he sends it.

There’s a long few minutes of nothing and then—oh...Tony’s sent him a video of him, in the bathroom presumably, stroking his cock and murmuring.

Look what you did to daddy baby, look how hard you made me...daddy can’t even get through a meeting without his baby needing him, huh? Gotta leave work early and come take care of you?

Tony groans as he cums, and Peter moans with him, spilling over his own hand, grinning as Tony huffs and murmurs—be good baby, I’ll be there soon.

——————

Soon, it turns out is three more hours. Which is still much earlier than he’d originally said he’d be there, but still, it feels like an eternity to Peter. He’s actually done his chores; laundry, cleaned his bathroom, completed his bio homework, and he’s thinking of going out for a patrol when there’s a knock at the front door.

He tugs on a T-shirt and hurries out, beaming when he sees it’s Tony through the peephole. He manages to get out a surprised gasp at the sight of him in a suit before the older man pushes him inside and kicks the door shut. Tony’s on him all at once, hands cupping his ass as he lifts him, mouth hungry on his as he presses Peter against the wall, devouring him.

Peter whines as Tony’s mouth trails over his throat, marking it deeply before he fists a hand in Peter’s hair and pulls, tilting his head so he can kiss all along his collarbones and lick at the soft space in the hollow of his throat.

Tony rolls his hips into Peter’s so he can feel the hard line of his cock as he growls in his ear.

“Can’t even get through a few hours alone, huh baby? You that desperate? Hmm?”

Peter’s breath hitches and he nods, gasping when Tony’s fingers tighten in his hair to hold him still.

“Gonna have to teach you how to wait baby. Gotta learn patience.”

Tony backs away from the wall and carries Peter to his room, lays him down and strips him bare, and then just sits back, looking at him. Peter makes a soft noise, needy and pitchy, slides a hand down to wrap around his cock, only for Tony to bat it away and then capture the other, pinning them above his head in one easy move.

“No touching baby. That’s for daddy,” Tony tells him, smiling dark and dangerously. Peter whines but nods, arches his hips up as though he thinks it’ll get Tony’s attention to his cock, but the older man just backs away, keeps his hips high so Peter can’t make contact.

“Keep your hands there baby,” Tony instructs before sitting back, his weight on Peter’s thighs so he can’t move. Peter watches as he strips off his jacket and rolls up his sleeves so the bronzed skin of his forearms is exposed. He’s so densely muscular, years of working on cars honing his body into a solid weight that feels perfect on top of Peter.

Tony grabs the lube Peter had out earlier and slicks his palm before wrapping his hand around Peter’s cock, smirking when he gasps and tries to arch into it. He strokes him slow and steady, eyes dark and hungry as Peter moans and writhes, gasping Tony’s name as he gets closer, heat building in his stomach.

I’m gonna... he manages to gasp out...and Tony’s hand is gone. Peter sobs at the loss of sensation, whining as his orgasm fades away, tossing his head on the pillow unhappily.

When Tony resumes stroking him he moans and shudders, but it’s only a few minutes later that Tony removes his hand again. “I told you baby, you gotta learn to wait,” Tony croons, hand rubbing Peter’s thigh soothingly as he keens and writhes.

Peter’s not sure how long it goes on for like that—hours, days? All he knows is Tony’s hand on him and the ache in him growing each time it isn’t allowed to break free. He’s sobbing for each breath, tears wetting his lashes as he begs and begs, every nerve in his body like a live wire.

“Want you...in me,” he manages to gasp, begging please please please, and it seems like Tony softens for moment, considering his plea. He nods slowly and grabs Peter’s hips, rolls him into his stomach and then pulls him to his knees, gently pushes his head back down when he tries to lift it.

“Okay baby,” Tony murmurs, “just hold on.”

Peter expects his fingers, lube maybe, but he doesn’t expect—Tony’s tongue, hot and wet over his hole, licking fervently into him. He cries out shrilly, gasping and clutching at the sheets as Tony devours him; licking and sucking at his rim until it feels puffy and loose, tongue thrusting in and moving inside him.

It’s joined by a finger and then another, thick and calloused, firm inside him, stretching as Tony continues to attack his rim. Peter keens when Tony nips at him, the sensation nearly overwhelming as a third finger joins the other two.

He can feel Tony searching, and when his fingers find it, Peter lets out a strangled scream and thrusts back, eyes rolling back as Tony fucks into him. He’s loose and wet and it’s loud, the sound of Tony’s fingers inside him—sloppy in a way that should be disgusting but makes his gut burn with pleasure.

He can feel it rising within him, hot and desperate and he tries, but he can’t form words, just strangled moans of Tony and daddy as he drools info the mattress and then everything goes white; soundless, sightless, senseless.

As sound and sensation creep back in around the edges he’s aware of how hard he’s cum, and the fact that he’s still hard. Tony’s fingers are still in him, and the older man is murming softly.

“Look at you sweetheart, look at the mess you made. That pretty little cock is still hard, huh? Well, you don’t get to cum again till daddy does,” he warns. Peter can hear a belt being undone and a zipper sliding down and then Tony’s fingers slip out of him and he moans at the loss, rocking back to chase them.

Tony laughs softly and turns him around, pulls him into his lap where he’s still dressed, but his cock is out, hard and red and throbbing. He guides Peter up and holds his hips as he pulls him down, eyes hooded and dark as they watch him.

Peter sobs at the sensation; Tony’s cock is thick and long, and it’s, it’s breaking him apart as he sinks down onto it, breath hitching as the head slips past his rim, a sobbing moan sliding from his throat as Tony pushes into him slowly.

It’s too much, too thick, pressing into his soft insides, and it hurts, but not real pain, pain like when he makes himself cum too many times in a row or pokes a bruise—heavy, throbbing sensation that makes him ache for more.

Tears blur his vision as Tony fills him, hard and heavy in his gut, the head of his cock pushing into his prostate like a punch to the gut. He shudders and curls inward, tucks himself into Tony’s chest panting and whining as Tony pushes the rest of the way into him.

He’s so full...it feels like he could split apart at the seams from how Tony’s cock is seated inside him, pressing into him, the weight of it taking his breath away. He’s shivering and breathing unsteadily, and when Tony’s hand makes slow circles over his back and his lips press into his hair, he whines and nuzzles into him further.

“You okay baby? We don’t have to keep going,” Tony murmurs, lips against his ear, voice warm with concern.

Peter shakes his head and sniffles, “S’really full,” he slurs, “s’alot.”

Tony nods and kisses his temple, “I know baby, just breathe, mmkay?”

Peter manages a weak nod and turns his chin so his nose is in the crook of Tony’s neck and his scent floods his nose; warm and spicy with undertones of grease and metal. Tony keeps making slow circles over his back and eventually he realizes he’s rocking his hips, making slow circles of his own on Tony’s cock.

“You ready baby? You gonna ride daddy’s cock?” Tony asks, voice a low hum in his ear.

Peter nods and wraps his arms around Tony’s shoulders as he sits straighter, a little bleary eyed as he stares into Tony’s eyes. The older man smiles and lifts a hand to cup his cheek, a tender expression on his face as Peter gains his rhythm.

“You’re so beautiful baby, all pink and flushed and fucked out from daddy cock. Love those little noises you make,” he murmurs, thumb pressing into Peter’s lower lip and then into his mouth as the boy moans and rolls his hips faster.

Peter is dazed and a little light headed, need swelling within him once more as he rides Tony, gasping and moaning around the fingers in his mouth. His ass burns, stretched open and throbbing at the weight of Tony’s cock thrusting into him, the heat of it filling him till he’s like a ripe fruit, swollen and ready to burst.

He sobs a little as he thrusts faster onto Tony, arching his back as he finds that spot within himself, pleasure like white lightning up his spine every time Tony’s cock drags over it. He’s not even coherent as he lifts himself and slams back down, cries loud and wrecked, chest heaving with every breath.

P-pleaseeeee...daddy! Uhn Uhn Uhn

Tony’s grip tightens on him as he watches his boy, flushed and crying, cock bouncing as he rides him, loud desperate moans filling the small apartment.

He wishes he had the foresight to record this, so he could watch it over and over again when they’re apart—next time, he promises himself. Pleasure burns in his gut as Peter bounces on his cock, tears on his cheeks as he begs to cum, cock drooling heavily on his stomach.

He’s close himself now, and decides to take mercy on his sweet boy. Wrapping his hand around his cock he strokes, twisting at the head and thumbing at the sensitive tip, groaning as Peter wails and jerks, sounds strangling as he bounces harder, faster.

Peter can’t tell where pain ends and pleasure begins; he’s too stretched out and Tony’s touch on his cock hurts, but he needs it, needs to cum, and the thrust of his cock inside him is hard against the bruised walls of his body, but it’s good, so so good and he can’t, he can’t—

Tony sucks a mark to his neck, “Cum for me baby,” he gasps, pressing his nail into the tip of Peter’s cock just as he slams down on Tony’s length. A wail rips from his boy’s throat and then his cum is splattering over his stomach and Tony’s hand and on his suit and he’s shuddering and following after him, spilling hot inside Peter with a groan of his name.

Peter sobs, rocking down on Tony as his cum fills him, hot against his tender insides, slipping out around his puffy, raw rim and he cries, shuddering through each spurt of his own cock into Tony’s hand until he’s got nothing left to give and he’s limp in Tony’s arms.

The older man hushes him as he cries, holds him tight and presses kisses to his face and throat and hair, crooning praise. “So good baby, you were so good. I’m so proud of you.”

Tony gently guides him back against his pillows, pulls out slowly and hushes Peter’s whine at the loss. Peter buries his face in Tony’s shoulder and breathes unsteadily as the older man runs his hands over him, shudders when his thick calloused fingers slide into his hole where he’s wet and open.

“God baby, look at you,” Tony rasps out, voice low and gravelly. “You’re a mess sweetheart. All open and wet with daddy’s cum.”

Peter whines and pushes his face against Tony’s throat, embarrassed but pleased.

“C’mon baby, look” Tony encourages and he finally pulls away, leans up and peers down, flushes when he sees the way his thighs are coated in sticky white, his and Tony’s cum staining his skin.

He collapses back and throws an arm over his eyes, entirely exhausted and wrung out. A dull ache throbs inside him where Tony was, and he can feel his hole trying to tighten, but he’s still loose and dripping cum and he shivers, enjoying the slick sensation of it.

Tony kisses his cheek and pushes his arm off his eyes, gaze worried and soft. “Are you okay Peter? Anything hurt?”

Peter laughs softly and slings his arm around Tony’s neck, draws him down for a kiss that’s uncoordinated and sweet. “I’m ok, promise,” he breathes against Tony’s lips. The older man studies him with a hint of suspicion and then nods, smiling softly.

“Mmkay sweetheart. We’re gonna shower and then you’re gonna eat and watch a movie with me.”

Peter stares at him for a long moment, throat working to produce the words he wants desperately to ask.

“You’re staying?”

Tony’s gaze softens and he nods, leans in for a kiss, “Baby, of course I’m staying—you’re never getting rid of me now,” he promises with a wry little smirk Peter can feel against his mouth.

He grins and pulls him closer, “Good. I don’t want you going anywhere...except inside me.”

Tony laughs and drops his head to Peter’s shoulder, body shaking with laughter and Peter grins; he’s so glad he called that line and found Tony.

Found this.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my number, so call me maybe

———————

@sluttystarker @starkerchemistryy @pantastic-peach @thebadthingshappen @ciel-mio @hpspazz @starker-4ever @w1nters-stark @foof-a-loof @confused-trash-kitten @panicdotexe @stqrker @honey-honey-darling @mariketa12 @itsmeryshipper @dramione90 @starker-flame @pretzelpoetry @seriouslystarker @starkerthanreality @ikneelbeforemygod @professional-fangirl75 @virgilismypoorshadowling @godlovesstarker @sapphicfreak @veronicashipsit @the-dark-obsidian-princess @ikneelbeforemygod @laughing-oreo @sensei-sans-sugoi @ruelukas22 @tom-starker @yourlittlemelody

#starker #starcrossedtalks #peter parker x tony stark #peter x tony #daddy stark

[shannonwhumps]

for the whump dialogue thing: either 4, 19, or 20! it’s up to you.

I’m gonna try and add them all together!!!!4: “I’m going to break your hand now. Please do try and keep the noise down.”19:  “The pain meds aren’t working! Don’t you hear him?” 20: “Bud, you can’t rest yet. Keep your eyes open.”

Peter doesn’t know how long it’s been. All he know is that he doesn’t remember a life before pain. He remembers breaking his collarbone, 2 ribs, and femur all on one night of patrolling and compared to this, that felt like nothing. 

This man, holding him in this dark basement for only God knows why, has hurt him in so many different ways, Peter can’t even start to compile a list of injuries. So much hurts that nothing truly hurts anymore. It hurts so much, it’s numb in the worst way. 

He doesn’t even know if he’s screaming anymore. His throat is too torn up to handle even a whisper. He must scream though because the man picks up his hand in his and holds it gently. His voice isn’t as gentle as his touch, but he’s not exactly soft-spoken either. “I’m going to break your hand now. Please do try to keep the noise down. Your constant screaming gives me such a headache.”

Peter would let out a sob at the warning earlier in his captivity, but now, a broken hand is nothing. It’ll probably just tickle--. 

“Break his hand and I’ll break your fucking neck.” 

That voice...that voice is familiar. It makes Peter feel safer than he has in weeks. It’s been a while since he’s heard it. It’s been a while since he believed he’d hear it again. 

The man holding him goes still and Peter can see the fear in his eyes as they widen. He turns his head over his shoulder and then Peter can see him. The light shining from behind him outlines him like an angel. His guardian angel. 

“Stark--?” He doesn’t even finish his sentence before Tony is punching him across the face and he drops to the floor. Even though he doesn’t get up and Peter knows he’s unconscious, it doesn’t make him feel any more relieved. Feeling relieved is just an easy way to let his guard down and let more pain in. 

So, even though he was safe and out of danger, he didn’t move. He was never truly safe. Not down here. Not with this man. 

Tony barely spares that man on the ground another look as he took a step closer. He reaches a hand out but didn’t stopped just before it came near him as Peter felt his body flinch. Or at least he thinks it flinched. He isn’t sure what his body does anymore. He tries to distance himself from it. It’s easier to deal with the pain that way. 

“Pete, it’s me. It’s Tony...” His voice is quiet and not how Peter remembers it. “I’m gonna take you home now.” 

Peter lets out a gruntled whine involuntarily. He can’t leave. That’s against the rules and he knows the consequences of not listening. He doesn’t want that lesson repeated. So he stares ahead and blinks. 

Tony looks more worried and his eyes are watery. Peter wants to fall into his arms like he’s imagined in every rescue scenario, but now he’s terrified. “Buddy,” he tries again, his voice cracking, “it’s me. You’re okay. You’re safe.” 

Peter lets out a whimper he wishes he could have held back because he only seems even more pathetic. His eyes flicker down to the man unconscious on the floor. 

Tony follows his gaze and just like always, he knows exactly what to say when Peter says nothing at all. He turns around to someone behind him (Peter can’t bring himself to focus on who it is) and snaps, “Get this prick out of here and away from the kid. Now!”

Two men come running in and drag the limp body away. Peter waits for the body to disappear and a moment longer to make sure he’s not coming back. He looks around the room, waiting for someone to jump out and prove this is all a trick. Tony really isn’t here. He’s dreaming. It’s a dream. But nothing happens. Tony stays there, looking realer than he ever has and Peter stares. Tony is patient and doesn’t rush him. 

Peter fidgets once and lets out another whine, but it’s all his body can do. He hasn’t spoken in...well, Peter’s lost count. He lifts his handcuffed hands towards Tony slowly and still, Tony doesn’t move. He’s waiting. Peter can’t do much with the restraints so he wiggles his fingers beseechingly and then Tony asks, “Can I hold you?” 

Peter nods his head, desperately. Tony leans forward and wraps his arms around Peter. He doesn’t care that Peter is filthy with dirt and blood; the man only showered him down with cold water every few days. He pulls Peter in so close to his chest Peter feels like he can’t breathe. But, it’s not like the ‘can’t breathe’ when the man held his head under water. It’s the ‘can’t breathe’ he’s forgot how good it felt just to be...hugged. Just to be touched in a way that caused him no pain. 

He fell into his arms and melted into the embrace. Tony holding him so securely, his heart beating against Peter’s ear, the soft words Tony is mumbling to him, the way Tony’s hand finds its way into his curls...it breaks him. It breaks the shell he’s built up and he lets it all go at once. He feels the pain-- he feels every last bit of it and he sobs. 

Tony pulls him in closer and his own voice sounds close to breaking. “I’ve got you, Petey. It’s going to be okay.” 

Peter knows this. Now that Tony is here, he knows it’s going to be okay. He’s nowhere safer than in Tony’s arms. So he relaxes in his hold and lets his eyes flutter shut after countless sleepless nights. 

Tony doesn’t like that idea. “Bud, you can’t rest yet. Keep your eyes open.”

Peter grunts but doesn’t open his eyes. He just wants to sleep. 

Tony pulls back and Peter whines at the loss of contact. “You cannot sleep. You need to get checked out.” He looks Peter over and he can only imagine what he looks like...chained up in his boxers, covered in bruises, blood, and welts. It’s pathetic. He’s pathetic. He can’t stop the next sob that leaves him. Tony cups his face and Peter leans into the touch. He lets his eyes shut for good this time despite Tony’s voice in his ear telling him to stay awake. 

He needs the sleep and he’s safe. So he does. 

--

He wakes up to a burning pain in his leg. Everything hurts. It’s all on fire and it’s too much for him to deal with. But there’s an even worse pressure on his leg. He’s not sure what he did-- he fell asleep. He isn’t supposed to sleep. That’s why the man is punishing him. 

Peter tries to hold back the cries. He’s not allowed to make a sound. He bites so hard on his lip, he tastes the blood. He’s been bleeding so much, he’s surprised there’s any left. But there is. And the blood he draws from his fills his mouth with a metallic taste. 

He can handle the pain on his leg until the same feeling starts in the other one. Is the man breaking his legs again? But he didn’t try to escape! He stayed still-- he didn’t move! 

Something snaps in his leg and he he can’t hold back the scream that rips through his throat. He thrashes before he can remember that he’s not supposed to move when he’s being hurt. He’s supposed to sit through the lesson and take it without complaint. But when one scream comes out, he can’t stop the rest. He only stops when he needs to take in a deep breath. 

“The pain meds aren’t working!” He hears a voice shout, sounding angry and scared. “Don’t you hear him?”

“There’s nothing-- we need to reset these bones, Stark! We already knew the meds might not work. It’s chance we had to take.” 

Peter cries out, wishing he can beg for them to stop, but that would require talking. He isn’t allowed to do that. So, he cries. 

“He’s in pain. Dammit, stop!” The voice is closer. 

“I told you you’d need to leave if you got too upset,” the woman warned. “I’ll ask you to leave if you don’t stop.” 

There’s another hand on him again. This time holding holding his hand, much more gentle than the other hands breaking his body. It reminds him of they way Tony held him in that dream. It had to be a dream because if he were back home and safe, why would Tony let them continue to hurt him? He wouldn’t. 

He hears his voice though. And maybe it’s in his head. Probably because there’s no other way he’d hear it over his screaming. But it brings a sliver of comfort to him. The voice is safe. The voice is home. “You’re okay, Pete. You’re okay. I’m right here and I will never leave. Not again.” 

#iron dad #peter parker #tony stark #peter and tony #whump #captivity #mute #torture #broken bones #rescue #conditioning #writing #the-great-escapism

[tellmesomethinggg]

****

linking this here bc it was technically a journal? i just don’t want it on my notes anymore and if i ever (likely not to) want to re-read for whatever reason. please note that i knew people would read this so things are censored and are the basic version. also there was a switch at one point from **** to chris because i didn’t want things to be read

(for later when i got time lmao)

Matt is a piece of shit that just wants to fuck -Chloe

well fuck

here goes nothing

the plan: don’t get drunk bc i got shit to do early next morning and ill tell him tomorrow when i do get drunk. spoiler alert that didn’t work

Gaby (coles gf) came too btw

so i had a smirnoff ice and said no more than two shots after so id be buzzed but not fully drunk (i ended up having three and was very much drunk)

me jon and gaby we’re talking about guys and i mentioned something about liking a guy or some shit and gaby looks at matt and then me and confirms it with me. then she tells me that apparently when she met me and a few other friends at the beach last quarter, that she predicted the two of us would end up together and told cole this. im like wtf how and she claims she’s psychic lol

later, Matt and i are on the sack and he looks at me and goes do you like me and im thinking well fuck so i say yes and he’s like well shit sorry but (and then i forgot exactly what he said) something along the lines of it’s not mutual or it’s not the right timing (i forgot okay) and then he gets up after a bit to go to the bathroom (I’m pretty sure cole went out too) and then me gaby and Jon have a chisme session and they think that he does like me but whatever

so the guys come back and at this point i really need to pee again so matt offers to take me and we start talking and he’s all, oh im sorry if i led you on and shit and im like it’s alright ill get over it, it just might be a bit awkward for me for a bit. but then on our way back from the bathroom he asks me , do you wanna at least kiss your crush at least one time and im like uhh yeah so he kisses me and then we start talking but i forgot about what and im kinda dizzy so he says, oh let’s sit on the couches for a bit before we go back, so we do and somehow we kiss again and then start making out

and at this point im like bitch there’s no way you don’t like me like why would you do that if you didn’t

so we finally go back and it’s been some time so the rest of em are obviously curious

matt goes with cole to the bathroom again and the three of us have a chisme session otra vez and they’re like yeah he fucking likes you he’s prob just scared bc of his last relationship

cole comes back in and basically backs up their side based on his convo he just had with matt

and so it’s decided that we’ll both sleep on the sack, Jon sleeps on his bed and the other two together in coles bed

he comes back and we all “go to sleep” but I push for him to hold me like he usually does whenever we sleep together and around like 2,3 am we both start making out again and just like uhhhh

also we’re both very much drunk but of course i tend to remember things whenever ive gotten drunk, however, he did not and so now we gotta talk and figure shit out and go from there

also im not telling Emilou or Hanna yet until we figure things out so

yeah

fuck

alrighty, so after last night, ive decided to do absolutely nothing about it and decided to just let things play out the way things do. i don’t wanna say something and ruin our friendship that we have bc i trust him a lot and like hanging out with him, so, i guess the end of this note for now, unless the situation changes anytime soon

Can Tim see what I write on this?     -Chloe

Yes -Janet

Hi Tim!

-Chloe

Tim pls respond.

-Chloe

Hi Chloe! Sorry I have been busy at home LOL

He responded I’m so happy!

-Chloe

FYI im just going to add things at the top of the note so that its easiwr to see stuff when i add it bc then otherwise youd have to scroll a ton

and I’m dating shit so i know when I wrote stuff and my memory and yeahhh

FEB 15 1 pm

chillin in alp so lets get this chisme

alrighty so last night i stayed the night in pratts but it wasnt just me so calmate, it was me and jon bc long story short i was too lazy/dizzy to get up and jons roommate had her bf over. basically we both shared the bed, not a lot of physical contact but whateva

brb

anyways, there was also one point where he was watching a movie from his childhood and idk what tf it was but he was shocked that i havent seen those movies, so apparently now im gonna watch them so i told him for payback we gotta watch disney movies lmao

oh also! i fucking got back to my room and took a shower to get ready for class, and when hanna gets back from class shes all like oh you slept in HiS rOoM huh and i was like uhhh yeah and told her the truth like i was too lazy and dizzy to get up and then she didnt really say anything but uhhhh yikes

and then i mentioned this to emilou later when we were walking to class and shes like yeah idk why she did that that was weird and i was thinking like thank God she doesnt think the same as hanna bc shes also slept in his room on the bean bag a few times

FEB 14 2pm

heyyy its valentines day and guess whos still single and workinggg

so uhhh last night, around 1, both me and pratt finished our shit (hw and studying) and im wide awake so im like hey, brooklyn 99? (because i got him into the show and i love rewatching the show bc its sooo good) and hes down so we start watching in his room. were both on his bed but were sitting (for the tie being) and eventually i decide to lay down and use one of his pillows but its the flat pillow so i attempt to steal his other one, which he protests and we lowkey wrestle over it and eventually i fail ugh and i fall over in frustration and land my head on his knee and then just quit and stay there, but get this, he just deals with it and lays on top of me, like his head is on my side. granted we both also have pillows so like his pillow is in between me and him and same for me but like ughhh

and eventually i fall asleep for like an episode (?) and wake up right before 3 am, and then decide hey sleep sounds important bc i have an 8 am and so does he, so i sit up but im too lazy to get up right away so i sit and go through twitter and shit so chris just lays down with his head on my leg and i set my arm down on his chest and he falls asleep for a few minutes and then i finish going through my social media and every part of me doesnt wanna move, but im also in a position that would be uncomfortable to fall asleep in so i wake him up and then go back to my room

oh and the other thing i forgot was that for a good couple hours we were texting and joking around and yeahhh

i feel like im reading a lot into what happens but at the same time, like i doubt id be this comfortable doing shit with guys like this and idk about him, but like sometimes i wonder you know?

also, saturday night, as far as i know, its just me and him going to the basketball game bc idk who else is going (eye emoji insert here bc im on my computer lmao) so we'll see what happens

FEB 10 11am

okay soooo last night,

the plan was to get buzzed, just me and matt and watch Brooklyn 9-9 but then Anthony and emilou joined us so never mind. after a bit, Anthony leaves so he can answer a phone call and pratt offers me shot #1 and not emilou (she’s laying on the bean bag, I’m on his roommates bed chillin behind her so she can’t see what’s up)

we take two and im slightly buzzed but i think “hey lets see how much we can take before she notices” and he’s down so uhhh let’s get this

later we have to include Anthony and he’s down to see how much we can take and he just lets us continue, i get to 4 shots and he finishes the bottle so i can’t have a 5th

brb im gonna go eat with him

okay im back now...

anyways were both pretty out of it, emilou still hasnt noticed and anthony finds this all funny i assume and so do i , and eventually she finds out and then the two of them leave i guess around 2 am and the two of us are both on the bean bag and were both tired and drunk and drunk me like petting his hair and apparently holding his hand and well yeah i kinda hate drunk me bc if that wasnt obvious enough lmao :/

continuin, we basically end up cuddled together most of the night until we both kind of sober up hella early in the morning and kind of separate a bit

and so in the morning guess who brought it uppp and i at least have an excuse that i was drunk and not thinking and just kinda doing whatever drunk me wanted to do (but omggg his hair is so fucking nice to play with omg) anyways imma just die real quick bc idk what happens now

also since no one else was in the room literally no one else knows about this and i think were keeping it that way bc lets be honest if anyone found out about that i think id be screwed for secret keeping and then well yeah

FEB 8 1AM

i remembered:

sunday 2-3

i forgot this happened but before I ended up in chris’s room i was chillin upstairs watching tv and then he came out on the phone with some one and long story short he said something on the phone to his friend along the lines of “you’re gonna have me in your life for a long time” and when he was saying that i was looking at him bc soy chismosa and i was curious and he winked at me and I died

Monday 2-4

so the other thing that happened was I had lunch/dinner with him before my writing class and no recuerdo que decimos, but uhhhh yeah

i like hanging out with him

also, just got back from his room and am more convinced that he may not like me but actually just sees me as a friend but at the same time maybe he does but IDK

i hate feelings and it’d be so much easier if i didn’t have them sometimes lmaooo

FEB 7 5-7 PM

so im currently in the room rn so im gonna try to make this as chronological as possible

saturday 2-2

alrighty so mind you this is the day ive volunteered with ship and have spent the whole day there, (i dont remember why i thought this was relevant :/)

so saturday night, i go to work in his room around 8 (?) so i can work on my essay and finish my shit bc he has a bean bag thats hella comfy to work on

andd so later on, jocelyn comes in to watch anime with him and then after i finish we all decide to watch gabriel iglesias and ended up squishing together on the bean bag with me in the middle of the two of them

and so were all chillin there, laughing whatever and at one point chris fucking pratt puts his head on my shoulder for a little bit and i dIeDddd

and eventually i fall asleep when we start watching emperors new groove and mind you im fucking next to chris pratt like uhhhh my GOD

so i wake up once the movies over and then go to the bathroom and come back and by then he has taken over the whole bean bag and im sad that i cant just get back and go back to sleep so i go back to my room

(hanna doesnt know what time i get back i think and im pretty sure it was around4 am) (emilous also not here bc she went home for the weekend)

sunday 2-3

so i decide hey i was productive yesterday and decide to return to his room to work on shit and try to get as much done before work in theevening

i finish around 1/2? and then i tell him im bored and i wanna do something before work but idk what so he says lets go to the rec room and its just the two of us and its chillin and he puts me on his story playing pool lmao

and then i go to work :(

but then THEN later after work i go for a run and end up back in his room and theres a couple other people there and so were all chilling (mind you this is around midnight)

and somehow i end up falling asleep on the bean bag next to this girl jon from my hall and (this is a secret in a secret) but i hear her get up at one point and then chris pratt then joins me and during the night im tossing and turning and leaning on him a bit (ughhhh i died a shit ton)

monday 2-4

so in the morning around 720 or so i wake up pay dumb and am like oh whend you get here and he explains and then hes like yeah i dont really know the girl who slept in my bed (one of jons friends) and i figured since im more comfortable with you id just move here (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me upppp) [please note that when i say fuck me up i dont mean that type of fuck]

alrighty thats what i remember that i havent told you, and then the other bit from the screen record was tuesday and now its thursday and here i am in guess whos room again

possibly staying the night lmao

but jons also here so its not like im staying the night staying the night

[milk-is-here]

Mista has been turned into a cat and he’s gotten lost! You find him but he’s all dirty and stinky!

Oh gosh this chonky boi

It was around 5 o clock when I realized that mista had been gone since 12. Usually his errands never take more than and hour or two, giving me time to tidy the apartment and take care of our pets. Getting worried, I set off outside after slipping on and old hoodie, the fall weather making it a little chilly.

I walked down the street, looking around for the familiar pattern of his hat. Passing street after street and cafe after restaurant, I start to become more frantic, before passing in front of an alleyway and hearing an almost heartbreaking meow from a cat.

My head snapped in the felines direction, immediately going to see what was wrong with the poor creature. I was met with the sight of a large, dark brown cat with bits of mud and leaves caked on its fur, making me frown sadly. I quickly crouched to make myself look nonthreatening and extended my hand out towards it with my knuckles pointed upward, beckoning it over softly,

"Hey sweetheart.... how'd you get all dirty?"

The cat seemed to light up at the sight of me, quickly trotting over and shoving its head under my hand, purring with delight. Grimacing slightly at the feeling of mud on my hand, I carefully move to pick them up, feeling glad that I wore one of my old and worn out hoodies as I cradled them to my chest.

"Dont worry, I'll get you all cleaned up and cozy."

The purring seemed to intensify, the feline rubbing their face into my torso. I smiled softly before making my way back to the apartment, petting the cat every few minutes as I went.

Unlocking the door and walking inside, I set my keys in the bowl and immediately headed for the bathroom. Hopefully I wokt get too many war wounds from the battle that might happen.....

Gently setting them down in the tub, I started the water, making it a bit colder than lukewarm. Grabbing the spray nozzle, I set it to gentle waterfall and turn the knob from tub to shower. Surprisingly, the cat didnt even flinch, sitting calmly in the tub even as I moved the spray nozzle over their fur.

The tub began to run with murky water, quickly disappearing down the drain, leaves falling off as the water washed them away. After the pre-rinse, I grabbed the cat shampoo we use for haru, our tabby, and miko, our singapura kitten. Pouring some into my hands, I gently rub the shampoo into the cat's fur, loud purrs escaping from the furry friend.

Thoroughly scrubbed of all the mud, I run the spray nozzle over them again, washing away the suds and leaving behind a nice and shiny coat. Smiling to myself, I grab a towel and gently rubbing their fur until their fur was dry and fluffy. I giggled softly, petting their fur into a more laid down state.

"Alrighty, now to figure out what gender you are. Meow if you're a girl"

Sure I'm talking to a cat but hey, they're smart, they can communicate pretty well with humans, maybe it'll work. I got my answer as they- now he- simply stared at me before shoving his head under my palm again. I giggled more, gently picking him up and heading out of the bathroom, stopping to grab a pet perfume for cats.

Setting him down on the couch, I uncap the perfume and carefully sprayed the light coconut scent on his fur. Placing the bottle on the table, I sat down next to him, smiling when he immediately crawled into my lap.

"You know, you're very friendly for a stray. I'm definitely not complaining though, haru never wants to cuddle, haha"

I laughed quietly to myself, petting him gently. My thoughts started to drift to how I still hadn't found my boyfriend, and how he hasnt come home yet. I sighed heavily, causing the cat to look up at me.

"I wonder where he is..... he never takes this long, what if something happened? No, no he'll be fine, he has his stand to protect him. I shouldnt worry too much."

I sighed again, looking down at the cat with a slight smile. He was so soft, his fur reminded me of Mista's hair.

"I love him so much, it'd hurt like hell if I lost him. These past few years have been so wonderful and happy, I wouldn't trade it for the world. I just hope he comes home soon...."

The cat in my lap placed his paws on my chest, leaning up to lick my nose a few times, as if to say 'its gonna be okay'. I smiled softly, gently hugging the feline to my chest and kissing his forehead.

"I love you too, buddy. You're so cute, and your fur reminds me of him. It's getting late though, I think I'll sleep here and wait for him to come back..."

Yawning softly, I turn myself to lay on the couch, my head propped up by one of the throw pillows. Grabbing a blanket from under the coffee table, I draped it over myself, giggling softly as my new furry friend popped his head out of the top. My eyes slid shut, the comforting weight and vibrations from the cat soothing me to sleep.

The sun shone through the window, causing me to stir slightly. Then my eyes snapped open.

I felt a weight on me, definitely heavier than the large cat I had brought home yesterday. I looked down towards my chest, surprise and happiness filling my eyes as I saw my beloved boyfriend resting his head on my chest. Taking a moment to observe him, I noticed his hat was missing, and lifting up the blanket I noticed he was missing more than just his hat. I blushed crimson, quickly dropping the blanket back down.

The fluttering of the cloth on his skin woke him up, his eyes fluttering as he yawned softly. Craning his head up, he greeted me softly,

"Good morning, tesoro"

And then his eyes widened for a second before he wooped in joy. Grinning, he grabbed my face and kissed me all over, my forehead, nose, cheeks, lips, everywhere. I giggled loudly, asking him softly why he was so excited,

"Because I'm human again, babe!"

His statement gave me pause, tilting my head in confusion,

"What do you mean 'again'? Werent you always human?"

"I was the cat last night, tesori, believe it or not."

He was positively beaming and I opened my mouth to ask how he was turned into a cat before realizing it was probably the effect of a stand. I just shook my head with a smile on my face and kissed him softly,

"I'm just glad you're back, caro"

#birdy writes #request #fluffy #selfinsert #self insert #cat mista

[lifeisamaze]

Day 2 of December.

Intended to post how my November was, but i dont really have time for that.

Been skipping workout for almost a month due to late night sleeping i had these past few weeks, couldnt get myself up at dawn like i used to.. And the results: major breakout in the forehead. Sigh.. And dark circles in the eyes of course.

Cakinglyfe so far so good.. Upgrading my fondant skills and quite satisfied with, SpongeBob, looneytunes and cocomelon figurines i made. Eventhough i still couldnt upgrade myself to be less clumsy.. Cuts and burns everywhere in the hand.

And talking about how clumsy i am, i dropped a barbell plate right on to my foot. Fortunately, it was a small one but it has been 3 weeks and my foot hasnt healed yet. These few days it hurts so bad.. Hopefully it will healed before the trip.

Excited to have our very first vacation after 2years to Tangkahan this Christmas. A short getaway and a long holiday for me as i am not accepting any cake till new year. Except Aiko's.

Gonna get myself a new fridge after new year. The fridge is always full with my stuff.. it is the time for a new one myself😆😆

January must be a crazy month for me.. It is almost cny, a lot of things to do, mostly house chores and cleanup, preparing cookies and this year gotta bake more for mom.

Back to November.

The first day is always the happiest. Been receiving cakes and stuffs before my birthday. Atoi bought me shirt. Hani bought me ittaherl, erfi bought me young living diffuser, cindy got me face serum, ellis sent a huge apple. hahahaha. Mom in law gave me a necklace, mamamon pampered me with chanel foundie, andrian finally get me a bouquet as requested every year but he never bought me any. Hahahaha . And the other stuffs, foods from everyone. Feel blessed and loved always. O even Got someone sings for me on my birthday. Couldnt stop smiling whole day.. I think it is the day in 2021 where my face shines the brightest . Lol.

And for the record, Erfi's dad past away and sis in law healed from her sickness. I guess i still had a lot to write it here but i started to forgotten some important parts. Ckkk...

Baby H finally arrives and feel happy as we still maintain good convos and sharings. Been training myself for not putting too much heart in this. I guess i had leveled up! less drama, focus more in reality, eventhough sometimes things came across my mind..

Hmm.. I guess its enough for now.. Need to take a quick shower and get back to work. Nighty night.

[ariesbilly]

hot new au:(pt 1) billy runs away from home. he knows everyone’s expecting him to go back to where he lived in california and that if neil’s trying to find him he’s going in that direction. billy never never wants to have neil find him so in a panic he decides to go east first to throw him off the scent and protect himself. thats how he ends up sitting in a diner called pops in some small ass bumfuck nowhere USA town at three in the morning, trying to stretch six dollars as far as they’ll go.

(pt2) fp’s the only one working, he’s used to the night shift and he’s used to travellers stopping for a bite but billy’s different. fp looks at him and knows he’s a runaway. he reminds him of himself at 17 too - he’s tough and scowly but right now he looks more beaten down than anything, and really hungry. fp’s trying to be kind and slip extra food onto his plate. billy’s in no hurry to leave at first because he has no plan, and fp keeps glancing over at him. he can’t stop himself.

(pt3) but the attention makes billy balk. he doesnt want anyone to remember him being here and he already hates peoples eyes on him. he can tell fp’s trying to be kind but that just twigs him out more. he pays with a handful of grimy change and drives off in the camaro fps been admiring out the front window. fp wants to say something to him so bad as he’s paying but he loses his nerve. he’s not fred. he doesnt know what to say. he gets off the night shift around four or five in the morning

(pt 4) as the suns coming up. as he’s driving home something makes him take the scenic route instead of going through town. maybe he just needs to think. nothing ever happens in riverdale so he’s shocked when he finds a car accident at the side of the road - one vehicle crumpled into a tree. then he gets close enough to see it and his heart stops because its the camaro from earlier. fp isn’t even thinking before he’s braking and running to the wreck. the cops aren’t there yet.

(pt5) maybe there was bad weather/roads or maybe billy fell asleep at the wheel but he’s crumpled in the drivers seat, unconscious. fp pulls him out. he’s bleeding but he’s alive. fp notices the only other thing in the car is a small duffel bag on the passenger seat. it has everything billy owns in it. he grabs that too. he has billy in his passenger seat when billy wakes up and fp tells him he’s taking him to the hospital. billy starts panicking and screaming at him not to take him

(pt 6) billy's begging him and trying to grab the wheel. finally fp gives in and turns the car around. billys in pain but not badly hurt. he has a lot of little injuries that aren’t the kind you get in a car accident. stuff like cigarette burns, stuff fp recognizes really well. fp doesn't know what to do but he knows fred wakes up early. calls him and tells him whats going on while billy's cowering in his passenger seat like a caged animal. fp tells billy that fred knows first aid and hes gonna

(7/7) take him there to help him. he promises that he'll help him cover this up and that no one he's hiding from is going to find him. but billy just has to trust him on this one.

JULIA !!!!!! IM FUCKING QUAKING !!!

theyre at freds and fps standing right by billys side while fred fixes him up. billys super cautious of the both of them but since he knows fp marginally better he’s a little happy fp hasnt left him alone with this other complete stranger. and once billys all patched up fred sends him to living room to watch tv and rest on the couch, asks if he wants anything to eat or drink... and once billys gone freds pulling fp aside and asking what the hell is going on, who is this kid etc and fp tells him about seeing him first at the diner and then the car crash and he thinks billys a runaway, running away from some bad shit and fred gets it, gets what fp sees but now what are they gonna do? 

 fps asking if billy can stay with fred. theres no room in the trailer and he cant afford to keep in a motel. plus he thinks billy needs to be watched anyway, he seems like the type to act out, do something stupid. freds reluctant. he’s got enough going on. he sympathizes with the kid but its a lot to process right now and he makes a fair point that billy might not even agree to any of this and fps saying he’ll come by to help when he’s not working and he’ll talk to billy and itll only be temporary until they figure out a longterm solution. fp really thinks he can help this kid and he wouldnt be dragging fred into it if he didnt think he could help him too. finally fred gives in and agrees but only if fp can talk billy into staying.

billy, of course, is skeptical of the whole thing. part of him thinks these are just two psychos waiting to chain him down and skin him alive or something. who the hell knows what weird shit goes down in small towns like this. but fp does his best to assure billy that he can leave whenever he wants if he doesnt like the arrangement but to at least give a try. he knows billys low on cash and isnt gonna make it much longer, fp can see about getting him a job at pops or something, maybe work for a mechanic on the south side if thats more his scene. billy cant argue that he needs cash... and having somewhere to sleep besides his car would be a nice change so he caves. says he’ll stay but as soon as shit starts getting weird he’s leaving and fp says thats fair. fred offers up his shower and some clean clothes, says billy can nap in his room if he’s tired. fred and fp stay downstairs trying to figure out a game plan for this whole thing, the three of them having no idea what the hell theyre getting themselves in to.

#briana answers things #fredheads

[nadjaofstatenisland]

hal has no idea why hiram EVER showers at school, because his house has the most enviable bathroom situation hal has ever seen. the lodge house has 3 bathrooms for every one person living in there, and the one attached to hiram's room is the size of a small concert hall. everything is marble and gleaming clean and smells like hirams cologne, with fluffy cloud-like bathmats and giant fluffy monogrammed towels. hiram barely ever uses it which boggles hal's mind.

there's a separate, equally beautiful "guest" bathroom that hal could technically use when he stays over but something about showering where hiram showers gives him this secret thrill that he can never ever ever ever tell anyone about. also the best shampoos and stuff are in hirams room: he has the best grooming products money can buy and he scarcely touches them. he's always getting his hair professionally done anyway. he lets hal take home and keep whole bottles of shampoo and hal cries w joy

hiram does this thing where he'll shower (theres a hot-tub sized bath AND a frosted glass shower stall to choose from) while hal is just chilling in the huge bathroom and theyll just talk through the shower walls. hiram takes long ass showers. hal always politely averts his eyes when hiram steps out to wrap himself in a towel but he doesnt have to bc hiram is totally shameless. (he hasnt heard about freds extra inch yet so hes really confident too). then hiram wont get fully dressed for AGES

they'll leave the hot steamy bathroom and hiram will just be hanging out in his towel or worse, put on underwear and then just lie down on the bed and have nothing else on and just keep chatting with hal as if nothing is out of the ordinary. meanwhile hal is watching his still-damp, warm, tanned skin like its the last thing hes ever gonna see. hal has popped so many uncomfortable boners in that room.

Of course Hal gets excited by nice bathrooms and fancy shampoo. Who doesn’t? You know on nights he sleeps over he totally takes long baths in that tub in the middle of the night after Hiram’s asleep. He turns on the jets and fills it with bubble bath (left sitting unopened on the tub sill) and sits there until the water is totally cold. He feels like telling Hiram all he has to tell girls is he has this tub in his en suite and they’d be lining up to come over. On second thought, he never wants to tell that information to Hiram, in case he actually does it.

Hiram walks around in his briefs (”Boxers leave way too much to the imagination, Hal. I’m not trying to hide anything.”) like it’s nobody’s business and Hal is really glad Hiram doesn’t care if he stares. I mean, how can he not? The guy has a full gym in the basement (even though they use the school gym all the time) and is totally ripped.

Hiram’s always laying on his bed, complaining that Hal’s sitting way across the room at the desk  with his legs crossed but honestly, he’s just trying to get his hormones in check and wondering why someone who owns so much doesn’t seem to own a goddamn robe.

Once Hiram found out about Fred and his - ahem - extra inch, he was devastated. Started talking showers with the door closed. Got dressed before even coming out! Hal tried to convince him that Hermione was just messing with him, but it didn’t do anything. Suddenly Hiram was always funny dressed. It sucked. Thus started Hiram’s plan to get Hal to see Fred’s dick so he could compare sizes.

“How can I possibly do that?”

Hiram started unbuckling his pants. “Easy. Grab the Polaroid and take a picture of mine. That way when you see Fred’s, mine will still be fresh in your mind.”

[bangzchan]

If you're still doing the Au word/ sentence thingy can I please chuck 'accidental spooning' into the mix? 🙊I just read all of the ones you wrote and i don't stop smiling from reading them until I realised that there weren't any more 😩love your writing and characterisation!!

thank u sooo much!!! im sorry theyre takin so long rip hope u like this one too💗 (lol this got way too long sorry)so, au where isak goes to his grandparents during his summer vacation and he hasnt been there for a year now, so he feels excited to spend a few weeks there and catch up on everything thats been happening. and its all going fine until he has to set the table and his grandma hands him a fourth plate and isak is confused?? and when he asks about it his grandma slaps a hand to her forehead, “i didnt even mention” and isak kinda has a bad feeling about it, “we’ve got a lovely boy helping us with the garden and other outside work”

 then isak frowns ,“alright, but why does he need to have dinner with us?” and his grandma looks at him in a way that tells isak he’s being a little rude, “he lives here for a few months, until he gets enough money for a flat” and isaks just. he has to sit down bc wow thats really smth they should’ve mentioned. especially that now he’s got his hopes up that its a really cute boy, wearing the cute garden dungarees with a cute straw hat. and the boy walks in just like that the next minute, except the hat but isak doesnt mind bc his hair falling into his face a little sweaty is smth isak could look at for hours. the boy’s eyes find isaks, and he blinks twice before smiling, walking up to isak, taking his gloves off and reaching out a hand, “hello, im even, u must be isak. its really nice to finally meet u” and isaks mind is going a mile a minute trying to let his voice AND their clasped hands sink in, and he doesnt get a word out just nods, then even walks away to take a shower and isaks body slams down on the chair and he feels exhausted for no reason. or it might be bc of how much his heart had to work with in no more than 5 minutes. then when he’s back, sitting opposite him, and theyre having dinner he finds out a little more about even but only basics like why he took this job ,why he’s not found a flat yet, or that he’s single. one of these make isak tighten the grip around his fork. 

after a few stolen glances at even and blushing pink when he gets caught half of the time, they finish dinner and isaks walking up to the room that his grandparents made isaks where he could stay when he comes over. except. “we didnt mention i live in this room now, huh” even walks up next to him and no, nobody said anything and the thought of sleeping on the couch makes him want to whine out loud. but then even is walking inside and he waits at the door until isak walks in too, confused. “well good news, we gotta share” and isak snorts, though his heart does a thing. “whats the good news then” and he’s glad when even doesnt get offended but just squints his eyes at him and isak thinks he’s gonna stick his tongue out. he doesnt though, and he just walks over to one of the cabinets and gets out a towel, handing it to isak, “i already showered so.. the bathroom is all yours” and isak thanks him and while he’s drying himself down after the shower, he’s trying to prepare himself for having to share a room with even. and he think he’s got himself together buT THEN he walks in the room and ??? evens lying in bed with his phone. so isak just stops at the door and stares dumbly, “u didnt get me like a, mattress or smth?” and even looks up from his phone, “no? i told you we’d share?” and oh. sharing the bed too. okay. so he hesitantely slips under the blanket, only one for the two of them, and when turns to put his phone next to the bed, his shirt rolls up and isak feels his mouth go dry and he averts his eyes, staring up at the ceiling. then even is squirming beside him trying to get into a comfy position and then theyre both lying on their backs, and its dark in the room now and even breaks the silence, “i hope you dont feel uncomfortable” and isak has to swallow before replying, “uh no, the bed is fine” and even chuckles which tugs at isaks heart, “i meant being uncomfortable with us sharing” and isak doesnt know how sharing a bed with one of the cutest and prettiest boys could be uncomfortable, “its chill” he’s really nervous. “chill” even repeats with a smile in his voice and then he’s turning around with his back to isak, and isak slowly falls asleep.

he wakes up to a soft knocking on the door and a voice from behind it, “breakfast is ready boys” and then isaks about to bury his face deeper into the pillow except his nose smushes against smth harder and he opens one eye to check and shit. its evens back. and his arm is wrapped around evens chest, their legs tangled under the sheets. he starts freaking out and mouths a few swear words then he’s counting down to 3 to slide his arm from evens body but when he’s at 2, even is turning around in his arms and isak freezes and forgets to shut his eyes, and even is facing him now and he can see his eyes slowly start to open and isak holds his breath, his eyes wide and he’s panicking and doesnt know why he just doESNT move his arm??? then even blinks a few times and isak sees he first notices the arm around him, which with him moving slid down to his hips, fingers only hovering above his skin, and he’s slowly turning his gaze ,to isaks chest, his neck and then he finds his eyes and. theyre just. staring. then evens voice is raspy and surprised “uuhh. morning?” and isak is 101% sure he’s gonna faint. “morning” he still doesnt move. then even huffs out a laugh and clears his throat, “did you have a nice sleep?” and isak swallows,”yeah. you?” and evens presses his lips together, rubbing his chin against his shoulder, “me too, really nice” then isak pulls his lips into an awkward smile and he looks to the side, “breakfast is ready” and even raises his eyebrows “yeah? we better go eat then” but neither of them move for another moment, and when isak finally gets the strength to move his arm, even moves his body the same time,and isaks fingers end up touching his hips and they both freeze and isaks just. holding him and evens stuck in a probably uncomfortable position and isaks heart is gonna jUMP out of his chest, then they chuckle nervously and isaks fingers slide down his hips and theyre standing up. isak stays behind and slaps his cheeks to wake up and curses a few more times before walking out with a smile

then theyre eating breakfast, sitting opposite each other again, and isak doesnt dare to look up, he’s afraid he made things awkward. so he’s tossing his food around when his grandma sits down, “so, was everything okay with the sharing?” and isak is already thinking about some reasons why the bed isnt good, but then even hums, “yeah it was cool, right isak?” and isak meets his eyes for the first time since the bed and all he can do is nod and then his grandma starts talking about something else, but isak doesnt listen. he shoots an apologetic smile at even who just shrugs with a grin and isak watches as even puts his mouth around the fork, eyes still on isak. isak blushes and hides his face behind his coffee cup

theyre doing the dishes together, alone in the kitchen and isak takes a deep breath when the silence has been going on for too long, “i hope i didnt make things awkward?” and even smiles at him, handing him a plate to wash off, “you didnt. to be honest it was nice waking up to that” and he bites his bottom lip. isaks heart does that thing again and he finds himself agreeing with even. then even nudges isaks shoulder with his own, “a cuddle’s a cuddle. i dont mind if you sneak your arms around me again” and isak blushes, “i was asleep when i did that!” and even squints his eyes, “mhm, sure” and isak splashes water at even and he does the same, and theyre laughing, but a few bubbles ended up on evens nose and isak admires it for a minute before he reaches up to remove it and even ducks his head with a blush and smiles at the ground and licks his lips with a grin that shines brighter than the washed plates

and that night isak is awake when he throws his arm around even, and he feels even move a bit closer and isak smiles against his back and evens heart picks up a quick rhythm under isaks hand and in the next days they notice how that quick rhythm becomes the normal for them when theyre around each other and it just gets quicker when they first hold hands with their fingers laced as theyre watching a movie on evens laptop or when isaks lips finally find even’s one night

#au #ask

[saintkimora]

ok……..here is the long awaited post of what happened on saturday night! (Last Saturday night btw not yesterday night) ive been too busy to post about it until now but it is juicy

so as i said on saturday, joel and i were texting on and off that day but it was weird as usual. so after i showered i wrote out a text to him saying that even though we havent been communicating much recently i still miss him and think about him all the time and that i appreciate the chances i do get to talk to him. so i sent this message but literally the second it sent i got a message from him. like we sent our texts at the same time. so i started reading his text and it started with “perry……im really sorry but what we have isnt working out” skafjhkajdhfkjads so i felt like a jolt in my legs and had to sit down. so he sent this long ass breakup text and here are the basic points that he used

he isnt ready for a relationship/exclusivity (even though HE was the one who literally deleted all his dating apps the day after we met bc he wanted to focus on pursuing me)

he hasnt been making the effort and i deserve someone who does

he hasnt been opening up and he is aware of that bc he knows he isnt ready

i deserve someone who is in a better place in their life than he is rn/someone who has their stuff together

i dont deserve what hes putting me through

he wants time to be single and make mistakes and regret them (stupid ass reasoning btw)

he knew using texts was the wrong way to end it but he wasnt strong enough to do it in person

he apologized if i feel like i wasted my time on him/if i regret anything ive done w him (since the last time i saw him before this was when i had sex with him)

hes sorry that he isnt treating me better

not my fault at all

so yeah that was the text! i didnt even read it fully until later on like i skimmed it and called him immediately and asked if we could talk in person (ofc i got all choked up trying to ask and almost started crying over the phone) so he said yes he owes me that much so i grabbed my tissue box, tried to put on my shoes (my mom had to help me bc i was shaking too much) and drove to his apartment and then sprinted to his apartment from where i parked a block away. i got there and his roommates werent home so it was just him. he opened the door and i said hi and he let me in and it was v solemn so we went into his room and sat on his bed and this is where the drama really started

so i was like “can i have a hug” and he was like “yes” so we hugged and i started crying. so we hugged for a while and then we separated and i was like “ok so explain why you want to end this” so he started explaining it to me. i was crying and he was crying too but i was crying more obv! i was like bawling. his eyes were red and tears were falling and he was sniffling but he wasnt like crying hard

so he just explained that he was in a bad place when he met me and he still is in that bad place (in reference to his depression) and how its not me its him and how i deserve someone who puts in the effort and doesnt distance themselves from me and actually has the time to see me and i was annoyed bc caleb did the same thing and i am sick of other guys telling me whats best for me like *vicki from rhoc voice* how do you know whats best for me? and like obv just bc you have depression doesnt mean you dont deserve love, like he said he still liked me and wanted to be with me and how it was breaking his heart to have to do this so i did not want him to end something just bc he felt he didnt deserve me or that he wasnt worthy of my love or anything like that 

so he also explained how he wasnt ready to settle down and i was like sis we arent even officially boyfriends yet, its not like im asking you to marry me and have kids lmfao and he said he wasnt ready for exclusivity so i was like “does that mean you wanna fuck other guys?” and he was like “i dont know” so ????? and he was like “im feeling conflicted” so i was like wtf is going on in here on this day

also i asked if his roommates were home and he said no he was home alone tonight and that was part of why he was feeling so bad and its like sis…..if being alone makes you feel worse then making yourself even more alone by breaking up w me doesnt seem like the best way to fix that! and i told him that i was free tonight and he couldve just invited me over if he was feeling lonely and he was like “i thought you would be busy” like sis literally the only times i am ever busy on saturday nights is when im with him!! lmao

he also said he wasnt opening up bc he couldnt/wasnt ready for it yet, but like i wasnt asking him to open up like all i wanted was for him to put a modicum of effort into our conversations just to show that he cared, like we can just keep doing fun things like im not asking him to get all deep and vulnerable with me (although i would love that too)

so we just had a very emotional time, i was crying my eyes out nonstop and he was lightly crying as well, there was lots of hugging and holding and stuff so like i was really really REALLY losing it like i was so MESSSSSSSSSSYYYY like i was just getting all in my feelings and saying all the things im gonna miss about him and like apologizing for anything i did wrong/apologizing for not being enough for him and like it was really really bad. but i was still also cracking jokes like a dumbass throughout the whole thing lmao bc i like to find the humor in things

i decided to mention that i was originally planning to ask him to be my bf officially on our next date (that plan had changed since he became cold and distant the past week or two but originally i was planning on doing it on the next date after i got back from the retreat) just bc i was being emotional

at one point he was laying on the bed and i was sitting on the edge of it crying (and covering my face bc im an ugly crier even though he’d already seen plenty of footage of me crying at this point) and he held out his arms and was like “come here” and i was like “no” and looked away and he was like “please” like that was very satisfying bc it showed that he needed comforting as well at that moment

at one point i was just laying on my side rolled up in a ball scream crying into my hands now THAT was messy. it was nice though bc joel moved in behind me and tried to hold me and calm me down. speaking of calming down! there were some points where i got like………REALLY bad like i was breathing so hard and fast it was troubling but whenever i had a wave of that joel held me and tried to soothe me and help me breathe

i even offered to have an open relationship if he wanted (bc this was during the exclusivity convo) bc i was just trying to grasp at any straws i could at the moment in the hopes of reaching an agreement or just stalling for time so i could move past his walls and get through to him. in reality i would never even consider it bc it is definitely not for me but at the moment i was desperate. he said no though bc he knows i wouldnt want that and he said he didnt want me to compromise myself for him

so then this is when we reached the turning point. so joel was laying down and i was like half sitting on the bed/half laying on him. and i said something along the lines of “you dont have to go through this alone, i wanna be there for you” and like when i said alone he lost IT! like we had a breakthrough he started bawling just like i was this whole time!! obviously it was hard for me to see him in that state but it was also kinda nice to see how much he cared 

but then he started breathing really fast and he was like “i think im having a panic attack” so i was like uh oh so i was like omg do you want me to get off of you or something but he was like no stay here so i kept holding him and tried to help him ride it out. but then he choked out the words “i think im making the wrong decision” like !!!! i have never felt such a strong feeling of hope in my life! but i was just like its fine dont worry about it just breathe and btw during this event he was laying on his side so he was looking to the side while i was kinda on top of him so i was like at him. so then he turned to look me directly in the face and………………………

he said “I love you!” like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hearing that made me SO so happy so i was like “i love you too!” and we hugged and kissed and then he was like “ask me!!” and i was like “ask you what???” and he was like “ask me what you were gonna ask me before!” and i was like “OH! joel……will you be my boyfriend?” and he was like “YES!” and then we hugged again and laughed and made out and it was really really passionate even though we were both gross with tears and runny noses, like it might have even been the most passionate kissing ive ever had! it was a very emotionally intimate moment and i loved it

so then he was like “im sorry” and i was like dont worry about it lmao so then we just continued cuddling and kissing and stuff for a while. he told me that he knew i loved him back bc during my breakdown i said “i really really really really liked you” and he said he knew i wanted to say i loved you lol

he also said hes gonna try to open up more and put more of an effort in so!! that was nice

so it was hot in his room and we were all sweaty on top of being gross from crying so we showered together which is always fun. and during the shower he was very touchy and he would like press his body against mine and give little kisses on like my chest or my back which i really loved. we also did some sexual stuff too

then we got out and dried off and he finally said he would watch flavor of love with me!! so we watched a few eps and it was super fun. then we cuddled until we fell asleep holding each other which is always one of my fave parts of our dates. he was very affectionate and sweet and i really liked it. then we fell asleep and in the morning i had to go home bc i had work or something

so yeah thats it! it made me really happy that he said i love you (and that he said it to me first!!) and i made sure he knew that he could always ask me for anything he needed if he was feeling down again or something. so now fast forward to today he is back to texting me every day and being an active and engaging texter! and i went over to do homework with him on monday night which was fun! and then on friday night he invited me over at like midnight and we got checkers and then we hung out and cuddled and watched more flavor of love. and then we did some more sexual things which was really fun! he was really really into me again and he literally is the hottest guy ive ever met so i enjoyed getting to make him feel good and stuff

on friday the 13th i am taking the gsa eboard + jami w me to go see the addams family musical at his school since he is part of the pit orchestra so that will be fun! i am very happy to have joel back and i am even happier that we are officially boyfriends now! and its so so so nice to get i love you texts again!! overall i am very happy with how things turned out and i am glad i fought to make it work instead of just seeing the text and being like ok bye

#personal #I'm posting this from mobile but I had it saved as a draft on my computer #so I hope the read more is still on it #if not.....sorry lol

[bookwormcheerleader]

i was tagged by @trevorfindsthestrals (LOOK i finally got internet access on my laptop again!! Sorry it took so long) 1. Coffee or tea? tea, i had my first cup of coffee on like thursday last week 2. Black and white or color? black or soft, but not pastel, colours 3. Drawings or paintings? idk, whatever is more moving in that moment i guess 4. Dresses or skirts? dresses because i never know how to match with a skirt 5. Books or movies? how DARE you make me choose, i think books, but i wanna make movies (potentially havent really explored that yet) so it seems like the wrong answer 6. Pepsi or Coke? i dont drink fizzy drinks 7. Chinese or Italian? definitely italian on an everyday basis but i LOVE chinese too 8. Early bird or night owl? its almost midnight and i havent started my reading for tomorrow, that counts as an answer right? 9. Chocolate or vanilla? chocolate, unless its a milkshake 10. Introvert or extrovert? introvert, i don’t really like people 11. Hugs or kisses? ive never been kissed so hugs 12. Hunting or fishing? aesthetics of hunting but uh with fishing you can not put a hook on the line and just kinda sit there and chill without looking like the animal lover that your family judges you for being 13. Winter or summer? yes. idk im probably more of a summer person, but i also really like the implications of winter in that everything has to die in order to be reborn, plus i can’t really breathe in the heat, but i also have poor circulation in my extremities so the cold sucks ass 14. Spring or fall? spring, i like the crisp air of fall dont get me wrong, but the rebirth and the petrichor after a spring rain with a crisp breeze that doesnt chill you is just so relaxing 15. Rural or urban? i grew up in the woods so rural but i need to at least be kinda close to a hospital to avoid panicking  16. PC or Mac? pc 17. Tan or pale? is this preference, cuz i dont have one of those, but i am so white that i was the same color as my cheer uniform in high school 18. Cake or pie? cake, i dont like pie crust 19. Ice cream or yogurt? frozen yogurt tbh, it jsut tastes fresher and less heavy 20. Ketchup or mustard? my brother likes to mock me for how much i loved ketchup when i was like 7 as if it was yesterday 21. Sweet pickles or dill pickles? i dont like pickles 22. Comedy or mystery? can we do a hybrid where its like theyre fighting crime but have no ability to act serious, cuz im basically writing a comic book like that with @spectralflutterbeast 23. Boots or sandals? i live in a colder wetter climate so usually boots, but i love sandals 24. Silver or gold? i like white gold typically because its often a mix, it has the matching ability of silver with the warmth in color of gold 25. Pop or Rock? i grew up on steve miller and journey from my mom and simon & garfunkel from my dad 26. Dancing or singing? all i can think of is my shitty karoke the other night, so uh dancing, at least i don’t suck more at that when im drunk 27. Checkers or chess? checkers is easier and i could probably actually win, but chess is more likely to hold my attention 28. Board games or video games? we used to do family board game nights (im currently holding the winnign streak for clue because any games played without everyone dont count) (my extended family is also obsessed with card games, its how we bond, we talk shit and play cards) 29. Wine or beer? wine if i have to have one of these, i dont like fizzy stuff ever so no beer but wine dries out my mouth 30. Freckles or dimples? i have freckles, and i love it when people have dimples 31. Honey mustard or BBQ sauce? i guess bbq 32. Body weight exercises or lifting weights? idk what body weight exercises includes but i have always liked lifting weights, its something im fairly good at 33. Baseball or basketball? BASEBALL IS THE BEST I LOVE IT, i miss playing it so much but its been too long for me to feel comfortable joining an intramural team 34. Crossword puzzles or sudokus? sudoku...i think 35. Facial hair or clean shaven? preference right, um stubble.... im not big on full beards (probs cuz my dad has always had one, seriously pics from when he was 20 we are the exact same but he has a beard, he says he hasnt shaved his upper lip since he was 16) clean shaven is nice too tho 36. Crushed ice or cubed ice? i prefer no ice, but if i have to i like that ice you get in hospital cafeterias 37. Skiing or snowboarding? never been 38. Smile or game face? smirking, its the happy medium 39. Bracelet or necklace? i feel naked without any piece of my jewelry (watch on right wrist, a bracelet on my left, a necklace for me to fidget with, both sets of earrings) 40. Fruit or vegetables? fruit 41. Sausage or bacon? bacon 42. Scrambled or fried? scrambled unless its on toast 43. Dark chocolate or white chocolate? dark chocolate 44. Tattoos or piercings? i have two sets of piercings and i just got my first tattoo last month 45. Antique or brand new? antique unless its something i would feel like i couldnt be comfortable using, i always wind up with a very eclectic mix 46. Dress up or dress down? dress down, never really have a reason to dress up 47. Cowboys or aliens? cowboys, space gives me anxiiety 48. Cats or dogs? dogs 49. Pancakes or waffles? depends on who is making the pancakes 50. Bond or Bourne? uhhhh what 51. Sci-Fi or fantasy? fantasy 52. Numbers or letters? letters 53. Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings? lotr tbh 54. Fair or theme park? fair, i grew up in puyallup (look it up, i can even sing the old theme song) 55. Money or fame? money, i want to buy my parents and aunt nice things 56. Washing dishes or doing laundry? laundry (no icky wet food pieces!) {this is what @trevorfindsthestrals had i just could not have said it any better myself} 57. Snakes or sharks? ummm snakes? cuz theyre smaller and i can run from them if theyre dangerous 58. Orange juice or apple juice? orange 59. Sunrise or sunset? sunsets seem more satisfactory to me 60. Slacker or over-achiever?.....i dont’ know how to answer this question 61. Pen or pencil? pencil, unless im worried about it smudging, then i bought some erasable pens for that 62. Peanut butter or jelly? peanut butter is more filling but i make jam every year so theres that 63. Grammys or Oscars? oscars 64. Detailed or abstract? why cant we do both, like a painting that is overall abstract but the closer you get the more you see the things that make it what it is, ya know, like life 65. Multiple choice questions or essay questions? idk multiple choice questions are harder to get wrong for not having enough info about a particular topic, but im good at and enjoy bsing things 66. Adventurous or cautious? i wish i was more adventurous but insecurities 67. Saver or spender? yes 68. Glasses or contacts? i dont wear either 69. Laptop or desktop? laptop 70. Classic or modern? what medium 71. Personal chef or personal fitness trainer? i would like a personal trainer until i get back in the habit of it and then i would jsut need a gym buddy 72. Internet or cell phone? cell since you cna get internet on your phone 73. Call or text? social anxiety so texting  74. Curly hair or straight? mine is beach wavy 75. Shower in the morning or shower in the evening? ive been showering in the morning because i like what it does to my hair 76. Spicy or mild? spicy please 77. Marvel or DC? wonder woman was my first favorite character, like about the time that bugs life came out because i obviously had two and the other was Flick  78. Paying a mortgage or paying rent? rent, i like assurance but i dont like permanence 79. Sky dive or bungee jump? never been but uh im not that trusting so i probably am jsut gonna go with a no 80. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? chewy chips ahoy 81. Jello or pudding? jello 82. Truth or dare? im a chicken so truth 83. Roller coaster or Ferris wheel? roller coaster, ferris wheels are all of the fear with none of the fun 84. Leather or denim? I NEED BOTH I CANT CHOOSE 85. Stripes or solids? stripes and fat people lol no, solids for me 86. Bagels or muffins? bagels probably 87. Whole wheat or white? whole wheat 88. Beads or pearls? pearls, my mother was a jeweler for 13 years, i cant not 89. Hardwood or carpet? hard wood in a hall, tile or linoleum in the kitchen and bathroom and then carpet everywhere else 90. Bright colors or neutral tones? uhhhh for what, cuz it really depends  91. Be older than you are or younger than you are? i want to be like 34, not rn obviously, im enjoying being 20 and stupid, but i feel like 34 is a good age, of course thats abotu how old my bros were when i idolized them so that might be reflective of that 92. Raisins or nuts? raisins, partially because every time my dad sees nuts he says nuts for the nutty and it has become a conditioned response for me now 93. Picnic or nice restaurant? picnic 94. Black leather or brown leather? brown 95. Long hair or short hair? mines somewhere in the middle 96. “Ready, aim, fire” or “Ready, fire, aim”? wtf does the second even mean 97. Fiction or non-fiction? fiction 98. Smoking or non-smoking? i have asthma 99. Think before you talk or talk before you think? i wish i could think before i talk more than i actually do 100. Asking questions or answering questions? i like to listen to people imma tag: @kiavachiisanoob @warriorsatthedisco @colecast1 and anyone lookinng for an excuse to do one of these

[punkscowardschampions]

Indie & Rio

Indie: where you at? Indie: you gotta chat at me Rio: I went down Skerries Rio: I can come back, if you want or Rio: are you okay Indie: w mckenna or are you kicking it 💸💸? Rio: No, with Buster Rio: I just had to get away, you know, give everyone air Indie: its a mood Rio: Yeah, not what I wanted or planned but you know Rio: Where'd you go? Rio: At the shower, I mean Indie: I hit my boy up Indie: felt it you kno Rio: Ah, right Rio: Don't blame you Indie: something in the water innit Rio: Don't Rio: What's he said, then Indie: you kno how hes flexing w it Indie: dont make me chat it back Rio: I can imagine how he's selling it Rio: do you believe him though? Indie: is it? you gotta ask me that Indie: thats how it be now Rio: Inds, I just want to know what I've got to put right with you so I can Rio: I don't care about him, just you Indie: you reckon imma roll with any of his shots on any day Indie: hes chief and he always been it Indie: dont fucking play me that way Indie: what you did is you left me w him Rio: I didn't know where you were Rio: and I couldn't stay Indie: not bothered Indie: where you expect him to try and be? hes not gonna still lay out at hers Rio: Exactly Rio: So I can't be there now Rio: I didn't expect any of this, I didn't think he'd do anything like this, Jesus Indie: it's chill for you w mckenna primed to jet you to skerries Indie: i dont get to leave this drum Indie: his now Rio: Go Home Rio: they'd rather have you there than with him Indie: yeah cos i can show my face Rio: Of course you can Rio: you've not done anything wrong Indie: it looks exactly like his Indie: how are they trying to see that rn Indie: how are you fit to either Rio: So does Edie Rio: and they want her home too Rio: you aren't him Indie: nah Indie: shes got your ma in her Indie: and shes blood Rio: When has that ever mattered to us? Indie: hes made it like it aint before Indie: us v you Rio: Nah Rio: he hasn't got that influence Indie: i cant be around it Indie: none of Rio: Alright but can you be around him? Rio: What are you gonna do Indie: ive got places Indie: if you get to run i get to run Rio: I told you Rio: I'll come back Indie: to what and to where bitch Indie: we aint got a yard of our own anymore Rio: Just please go home Indie: im going where i feel love Indie: still Rio: Don't do them like that Rio: that's bullshit Indie: don't come for me Indie: you aint there Indie: if you feel it so hard you take it Rio: Like I said Rio: you didn't do anything wrong Indie: and you aint Indie: whatever he spits Rio: We both know it ain't that cut and dry Indie: whats bullshit now Indie: ive been front row Indie: 👀 & 👂 Indie: you cant chat that to me Rio: Yeah, you have, and so has he Rio: not an excuse but clearly fucked with him Indie: allow it Indie: hes been trying to get on you since he dashed ryan out Indie: fucked with you since then least Indie: it aint no new dream Rio: Yeah and I've been hoeing since when Indie: dont give him no licence to slip Indie: hes known you since younger than Rio: I've always been like this Indie: what you feeding me his lines for Rio: He's not entirely full of shit Indie: dash that Indie: youre spinning me out Indie: come back when youre you Indie: not his rinsed hoe that cant relate Indie: if youre gonna buy in you shouldve just rode him Rio: Fuck off Indie: youre his mouth piece rn Indie: word by word Rio: I don't have all the answers, alright Rio: I'm sorry but that's the truth Indie: nah Indie: the truth is you reckon hes right Indie: i live in that madness Indie: that means him or you if thats how youre trying to be Indie: *cant Rio: I'm not saying his actions were Rio: He still shouldn't have Indie: what youre saying tho is dred enough Indie: you think you can come through and raise me w that outlook nah bitch Indie: i already got one ma who let him run her Rio: What do you want me to say? Rio: I'm fucked, Indie, that's all there is to it Indie: what do you want me to say Indie: gone is gone Indie: she is and you are Indie: same reason Rio: Don't be like that Rio: I'm not dead Indie: dead to me if youre gonna let him say what he is and not fight back Rio: If that's how you feel Rio: then I can't change your mind on that Indie: how are you still rolling Indie: taking this Indie: what more he gotta do Rio: It's over now, it's done Indie: its not done Indie: he wants me to live with him Indie: pass you over Indie: he wants to say that everything he did you loved it like that Rio: Well no one believes him or will listen so Indie: then what you hiding for Indie: you dont say that but do this Rio: because I don't want to be there alright Indie: why tho Rio: Same reasons you don't Indie: where you gonna be Rio: I haven't decided where I'll end up yet Rio: but I'm going back to London with Buster for a bit Indie: safe Rio: I know that's not how you really feel Rio: but that's what I've got to do Indie: you do you Indie: ill do me and that's how it is now Rio: You still have everyone else Indie: i kno i got heads Indie: im good Indie: got all my boys including my main 💘 Rio: Yeah, them too Indie: its jam Indie: got my own back above it too Rio: I know Rio: You don't have to pretend it's all alright Rio: it's fucked Indie: like it hasnt been from when Rio: exactly Rio: so stick with the fam Rio: don't make it harder on yourself, no one wants you to Indie: tell yourself Indie: i dont need you to school me rn its hols still Rio: Be serious Indie: how serious you want it Rio: Admit that you aren't alright, accept the help people want to give you Rio: and do what I say Rio: or I will come back and force you to too Indie: i cant Rio: You can Rio: I know you can Indie: i need air from this too Indie: why is that only for you Rio: Because you're only 14 Rio: you can't do this on your own Rio: you can still be out all day and all night but don't forget that that's your base and that's your people Indie: im grown enough when thats how you want it Indie: and him Rio: Because I let you come to some parties with me and didn't baby you? Rio: It isn't the same Rio: I never made you do anything that was actually inappropriate, and I didn't love it when you were getting high 24/7 to cope, I never acted like I did Rio: so don't even start Indie: dont make me now then Rio: I'm telling you Rio: I'll come home right now, yeah Indie: nah Rio: No, I'm going to Indie: be in london or our ends, be where you want Indie: not for me tho Indie: if your around me hes around you Indie: that aint how this is playing out Rio: Not if we're home Rio: he's got some sense, fucking hell Rio: that's how it's going to be, this isn't happening, we should all be under one roof Indie: dont law me Indie: i aint owned by you Indie: you said you dont wanna be there Indie: im not carrying that i fucking cant Rio: You don't just get to do what you want, you're a child, I'm barely not one Rio: this is how we got here Indie: we got here cos of him Indie: hes not running me Indie: not ever Indie: ill do what i want Rio: Yeah, he ain't Rio: because he doesn't know how to be a fucking parent Rio: you'll get taken into care if you aren't careful Indie: thats what youre gonna chat now Indie: the baitest line you can pull Indie: thats been over me since i was born into this Indie: but where am i Indie: still Rio: because everyone else made sure you stayed here Rio: if you reckon that was the wrong decision then you can feel hard done by but everyone was just doing their best for you, what seemed best at the time Indie: i aint living like ive turned from them Indie: dont be extra Rio: Good Rio: don't Indie: if i need to make things lighter on myself i will Indie: you cant force me to be anywhere Rio: Yeah what do I know Rio: Do what you like, it's gonna be a laugh a minute Indie: im not vibing for that much of a jump off Indie: just not this Indie: let me be with people who dont kno Indie: why is that something to get the feds out over Rio: Because I was never saying you couldn't be, I don't know why you're coming at me with that Rio: but you need to promise me you're not going to keep away from the fam completely and you won't and I'm not thick Rio: I know what that means Indie: Edie gets to do it Indie: wheres her come through Rio: She doesn't Rio: she just does it Rio: we're all trying to sort that every fucking day, don't get it twisted babe Indie: how cant i Indie: everything else is Rio: I know Rio: but we don't need to be throwing more shit to sort onto the pile you feel Indie: i cant give you what you need Indie: i cant handle this Indie: i barely had my head around how it was trying to be w him and my step ma and the younger Indie: what is this Rio: I'm not asking you for anything, how can I when I'm letting you down so hard Rio: I don't know, it's fucked, everything is fucked Rio: you're still going to have a younger though, she's not going anywhere Indie: like how Edie didnt yeah? Indie: i wont be allowed near Indie: she didnt like me fore this Rio: She's a messed up kid, you are too Rio: it isn't personal, she just needs to blame us all for the shit that's in her head and I can't really blame her Rio: it's easy for us to all sit back and say well it's all Drew so don't look at us Rio: but he ain't the fucking boogeyman, whatever he is Indie: he still takes everything from me Indie: it'll play down to the next Indie: another messed up kid and then Rio: Yeah, it shouldn't have happened Rio: we can't actually castrate him though Indie: he gives me a sister to take her away again Indie: no way im playing happy families w his failed wifey am i Rio: Ro will always let you see Astrid Rio: she ain't like that, again, whatever she is Rio: you don't have to be her best friend to see your sister Indie: she didnt want me around when she was 😍 itll be less now shes 💔 Rio: She just doesn't know how to handle people Rio: fullstop Rio: it wasn't because of you Indie: you can chat that but what she doesnt kno how to handle is reminders of how he be Indie: thats me Indie: i came for her perfect image and now im an i told you so Rio: You're nothing like him, just in looks Rio: whatever grievance she has with Drew, is with him Rio: and frankly she should have sorted long ago but regardless, it ain't on you Indie: nah cos im from him, my ma everything back then he aint learned from it Indie: who wants to know that bout someone whenever they have to see me coming through Rio: You aren't that, to us you're you Rio: and to the olders, you remind them if your Ma, and all the good there Rio: No one needs reminding of his fuckups because he's still alive and out here making 'em, come on Indie: how did he want another kid and not us Rio: I don't think he did want her Rio: Sorry but Indie: I don't want to be in my head Indie: this place Indie: none Rio: I know Rio: Me either Indie: I'm sorry i didnt stay at the baby shower Indie: maybe if i wasnt so high Indie: idk man Rio: You can't blame yourself, none of us can Indie: i wasnt in your corner Rio: He was going to make that happen, he'd decided and that's how he rolls, fuck whatever any of us want or do or say Rio: You were, things were good, they don't have to change, we don't, you and me Indie: i can stop him sometimes Indie: if hes feeling it he listens to me Rio: Yeah, I'm not trying to take what you do have with him Rio: but likewise, not going to let you try to carry that burden, he's grown, he makes choices and even if you ain't got there to try and stop him, it's NEVER on you, alright Indie: me and him are rinsed out Indie: hes too on top to be around Indie: i vibe the chaos but i cant let him do me this way any more Indie: he tried to take you from me like its no thing and play it out like thats how you wanted it for long Indie: i cant unhear him how he chatted at me Rio: I'm really sorry, Inds Rio: wasteman or not, you shouldn't have to be out here calling time, but I understand and respect why and how you gotta Rio: Whatever you need, alright? You know you got me, I can get us a new place, we can go home, anything Rio: but you can take time too, you don't need to decide anything else rn Indie: he aint gonna heed it and i kno that Indie: its another reason i need to go Indie: my mans will protect me i aint gonna make you Indie: you gotta let mckenna do what he do and make it less Indie: take the air he aint trying to give none of us you kno Indie: i been a brat on how this convo went down Indie: ive got too much love for you to play you Rio: I know, he doesn't Rio: I want to, swear Rio: but maybe we both need time Rio: long as you promise to tell me when you need me to come back, I mean it, like, say the word when you need and there's no backlash of any kind alright Indie: I want you back now, for real Indie: but we all tripping off this Indie: and you need to get your head right too Indie: what he did its not just gonna be no thing cos thats easier you feel me Indie: same as how he cant switch now and need me to stand in for everything he lost Indie: he aint no dad to me Rio: You're right Rio: on all of it Rio: when'd you get so smart? Indie: im just 🚀 makes me sound it Indie: stoner wisdom be like Rio: Nah, I know that sound babe and it's usually total 💩 Indie: i miss you Indie: im not trying to but its real Rio: I miss you too Rio: we can still meet up, however long I gotta be away, I won't stay gone you know Indie: dont swerve me once you living lavish in london with that posh boy Rio: As if Rio: 24 'til I die, like Indie: how we gonna get the flat back Rio: tell the 'RA lads the address and they can firebomb him out? Rio: nah, we'll think of something though Indie: when everythings there but i kno he is Indie: im wearing creeps garms like im his rn Rio: I made Buster go for me, thank God he weren't there yet Rio: You could get Creeps to bell him for some gear and send him on a wild goose chase, pack as much as you can and duck out Rio: do it multiple times and take your stuff back home, even if you drop it whilst everyone's out, just so you've got a base that ain't got him in yeah? Indie: the excuse for why my homework aint done be 🔥 tho Indie: but yeah we riding cos thats a sick move Rio: Honestly Rio: this School this town so fucking sick of this fam Rio: lowkey hilarious if it weren't so dred Indie: innit Indie: if he wanna be my daddy so bad why he not writing me a note to get me outta detention Indie: 👀 you drew Rio: Teachers thinking you forged it 'cos who??? Indie: 🤔😂 Indie: markos here Indie: gotta bounce Rio: Oh, alright babe Rio: talk later 🧡 Indie: ✌

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

The Least I Can Do (Part 3)

Summary: Jensen takes the reader on their second date where she experiences her first con...

Part 1 Part 2

Pairing: Jensen x reader

Word Count: 3,100ish

Warnings: language

A/N: They just keep getting longer somehow...

“Morning sunshine,” said Jensen when you opened your door, a small carry on by his feet.

“Morning,” you said, waving him in. “There’s coffee if you want some.”

“Already made some,” he said, holding up a thermos. “You ready to go?”

“You texted me like three minutes ago saying to pack some clothes and whatever stuff I wanted,” you said, walking past your couch and into your bedroom where your empty backpack sat on the unmade bed.

“Was that not enough time?” he teased. 

“Do I need a dress? Nice shoes? A parka? I need to know what this con weekend thing is. Or where it even is,” you said.

“Are you that obsessed with clothes?” he asked and you scowled. Oh, if there was one stereotype you hated as much as the sleeping around underwear model it was the superficial clothes and makeup obsessed thing. “Y/N, relax. It was a joke.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t go,” you said. “We really don’t know much about each other and-”

“If you don’t want to go, then that’s fine. But please don’t change your mind because I tried to tease you and touched a nerve. I don’t think you care about name brands and crap like that really,” he said. 

“So,” you said giving him a smile. “Jeans and tees?”

“That’ll be fine. We’re going to a concert tonight too,” he said and you raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, give me ten minutes?” you asked and he smiled, pulling your door shut before you stopped him. “I’m not worried about you seeing my underwear drawer.”

“I don’t want to see my presents early,” he said with a smirk. 

“Oh don’t try this cocky flirting game with me Ackles. You’re gonna lose,” you said, watching him hold up his hands.

“I’ll behave for the foreseeable future,” he said. “Let me know when you’re ready to go.”

“Alright. Oh and Jensen?” you asked, watching him whip his body around after heading into your living room. “How much do I owe you for the plane ticket and hotel and stuff?”

“Nothing,” he said. “I didn’t have to pay for it so don’t argue that you should have to.”

“Wait, this is a show thing?” you asked. He nodded as he sat down. “Awesome.”

“Awesome?” he asked, crossing his arms.

“I may or may not have binged like four episodes last night...” you said, walking back into your room to pack.

“So, are you a Sam or Dean girl?” he asked.

“What’s that?” you asked.

“Which one are you attracted to,” he said, a laugh in his words. “I’ve got an idea.”

“Oh, I like John,” you said. “He’s got that hot older guy thing going on.”

“You realize I’m currently older than he was when the show started, right?” asked Jensen.

“You’ve got that hot older guy thing going on ya know,” you said, popping your head out the door with a smirk. “Although you were an adorable baby boy back then. Your voice was so much higher.”

“Is this that flirty tease thing I’m getting now?” he asked. “I’ll give it right back sweetheart.”

“That’s a very Dean thing to say,” you said, walking into your closet and pulling on your airport outfit. A pair of leggings, the first tee in sight and a light hooded jacket. You slipped on your throw away shoes, the ten dollar sneakers that you didn’t give a crap about but held up amazingly well and threw your hair back in a ponytail. You tossed a pair of jeans, three shirts, pajama shorts, some underwear and your to go zip up with all your personal care crap in it. You quickly grabbed headphones, charger and a book before you were zipping it up.

“That was fast,” he said when you walked out after only a few minutes. “You sure you don’t want your laptop?”

“We’ll be busy probably,” you said. You glanced over to your dinner table covered with a few sheets of paper and your computer. 

“True. Okay. Everything off, and-”

“I have travelled before,” you said, walking over to your thermostat and turning it down.

“Thankfully it’s not across country today. Only a couple hours down to Arizona,” he said, stepping out before you so you could lock up behind you. 

“You still haven’t told me about what a con is Ackles,” you said, testing your door before walking with him.

“If you’re already binging the show, you’re going to have fun.”

“What?” you asked the front desk when you were checking into your hotel early that afternoon.

“We never received a request for a second room. Unfortunately we’re booked up,” they said and you sighed before heading over to where Jensen was talking to Jared in the lobby, waiting to go up to their rooms.

“Um, they don’t have a room for me,” you said, looking out the front doors. “I can try the hotel across the street.”

“Seriously?” said Jared. “They normally don’t screw up stuff like that.”

“I’ll bunk with Jared and you can have my room,” said Jensen, offering a smile. Jared seemed okay with that but you definitely weren’t.

“It’s your room, you should keep it,” you said. 

“I mean, you guys could share too. Not like you’re dating or anything...” said Jared, bumping his arm into Jensen.

“It hasn’t even been 24 hours,” said Jensen.

“I’m okay with sharing. We wanted to spend more time with each other. That’s the reason I came in the first place, right?” you asked. 

“If he annoys the crap out of you just kick him out and send him to my room,” said Jared, patting your on the back. “Want to meet up in a few hours and grab dinner?”

“Sounds good to me,” you said. “Apparently there’s a concert tonight he’s taking me to so we should be back in time for that.”

“Yeah. I’m sure that’ll be fun for you,” said Jared, sharing some sort of silent look with Jensen. “Later guys.”

“What was that about?” you asked. Jensen threw his arm over your shoulders and started leading you over to the elevators. For a moment you forgot all about the conversation were absolutely focused on all the warm muscle around you. 

“Y/N? Hello?” he asked, waving a hand in front of your face. Whoops. 

“Um, sorry, zoned out. What’d you say?” you asked, Jensen’s arm moving away to press your floor button and you wished he’d put it back.

“I may or may not be part of the concert tonight. I haven’t decided yet,” he said. You tilted your head up at him to see his green eyes staring back. 

“Yes you have you little flirt,” you said.

“I have to make you think I’m cooler than I actually am. I’ll use this to my advantage in any way possible,” he said, bumping into you playfully. 

“Right, because tall blonde and handsome isn’t cool,” you teased. Jensen was about to spout off something flirty back but a hand caught the closing doors and his arm quickly fell away. Two young women around your age stepped in, their eyes a little wide. He must not have wanted to draw any attention to you yet.

“Hi,” one of them said to Jensen. 

“Hi,” he said back. “You guys here for the con?”

“Yeah, it’s our first one,” said the other women. Jensen seemed genuinely happy as you realized they were both a little nervous to be near him.

“Y/N’s too,” he said, pointing at you. “What floor you guys on?”

“Fifth,” they said, Jensen hitting the button for them. 

“Are you going to sing at the concert tonight?” one asked as they got to their floor.

“I was planning on it. Have fun this weekend,” he said, returning the wave they gave him as they slipped out. 

“You handled that really well,” you said when you were alone. He shrugged.

“I’m used to it. Most people are super nice. We don’t really do bad stuff or get in trouble so no one bothers us on a day to day basis. No one follows me around or takes my picture. I’m boring. This is the most attention I get really,” he said.

“I like that about you. You’re normal,” you said.

“Let’s see how this weekend goes first and see if I’m worth keeping around.”

“Hey,” said Jensen, hopping backstage after finishing up a song, covered in a thin layer of sweat. “Having fun?”

“I wish you could have seen the exact moment her jaw dropped,” said Jared with a laugh.

“Oh my...you’re like fucking amazing,” you said, not sure where to look at him first. “You look like a rockstar and sound like one and play guitar, not to mention all the acting stuff and-”

“Told you I had to make myself seem cool,” he said, grabbing a drink of water.

“Mission accomplished,” you said, still in awe over him.

“I wonder how long that’ll last,” said Jared, Jensen whacking him with his bottle. “Hey, you got to tease the shit out of me when Gen and I got together. Payback’s a bitch.”

“I was totally in favor of you guys!” said Jensen. “I didn’t do it the second day you knew Gen.”

“I’m making up for lost time,” said Jared. “I mean, I don’t see you saying anything to Y/N for saying how cute your butt looks in those jeans.”

“Jared! You were sworn to secrecy,” you said, slapping his arm. 

“I need protection from you two,” he joked. “Besides, we don’t have secrets in this family.”

“He’s right. We don’t. Seriously though, you think I have a cute butt?” asked Jensen with a wink.

“Your cool guy factor is going down you realize,” you said, crossing your arms.

“Twenty seconds. That was longer than I thought,” said Jared, standing and stretching. 

“Shudyup,” said Jensen. You listened to a few more songs before the show ended and you stood up to head back to your room. “Woah, where do you think you’re going?” he asked, catching your arm.

“Bed?” you said back.

“If you want to we can. Or we can go out for a few hours,” he said. 

“I’m game. Not sure about an old timer like yourself,” you said, Jared raising his eyebrows as Jensen squinted.

“Oh, we’ll see about that.”

“Why is your alarm going off. We went to bed three hours ago,” you groaned.

“Sorry. Morning panel,” he said, his voice thick with sleep but willing himself to get up from the other side of the bed. “You can go back to bed if you want and just see the afternoon one.”

“No, I wanna,” you mumbled, stretching out and slumping back into bed. 

“Sure about that?” he asked, pulling off his shirt and walking to the bathroom. 

“I’m sure,” you said. You flashed open your eyes and quickly shut them before your eyes started wandering all over him. “Why are you so perfect?”

“I’m really not,” he said. “Something’s obviously not right.”

“Hm?” you asked, sitting up and opening your eyes.

“Forget it. I’ll shower quick then you can have it. Panel starts at 8,” he said.

“Jensen?” you asked. You watched him take a long sip from his coffee just before his and Jared’s panel was supposed to start.

“This one is only thirty minutes or so. Then we can grab breakfast,” he said, offering a smile.

“You just didn’t meet the right person,” you said, his smile falling away. “I don’t think you should feel bad about not having met that person yet.”

“I didn’t say any of that,” he said. 

“You didn’t need to,” you said.

“Hopefully I finally met her. Even if she thinks I’m old,” he said, Jared rolling his eyes behind him, mouthing ‘idiot’ at him. “What is Jared doing?” he asked, turning around in his seat to see Jared walking away.

“Oh, just being a good friend,” you said. “Come on, I want to see my first panel.”

“This one is smaller so it’s a good place to start I hope,” said Jensen, standing and holding out a hand for you. You followed until someone pointed out where you could go so you could sneak into the audience. You were surprised at how informal the whole process was, how a simple question led to a story and then another but somehow they always seemed to stay on track. You found yourself wanting more by the time it was over.

“You two are adorable,” you said to the guys when you saw them after they’d finished. “No wonder you play such good brothers.”

“We spend a lot of time together. As you can tell by how much Jared’s been hanging out on our second date,” said Jensen. Jared didn’t take offense and asked if you’d met any of the other people at the con yet. “We’ve been hanging out so not really.”

“Do it before we head home. Everyone’s interested in meeting your new girlfriend,” said Jared.

“I haven’t even asked that yet,” said Jensen, his face heating up the more Jared teased.

“Jared, can you give us a minute?” you asked. You waited for the two of you to be alone in the hall.

“Thanks,” he said. “I know this is probably overwhelming on it’s own and-”

“Do you want to be my boyfriend?” you asked, looking up at confused green eyes. “Yeah, I was talking to you.”

“This isn’t scary or weird to you?” he asked. 

“I like you. You like me. We’ll be going on more dates. I think we check off those criteria for boyfriend and girlfriend,” you said, reaching out and taking one of his large hands in yours.

“You’ve got a point,” he said. “I guess we’re together then.”

“I guess we are,” you said back.

“Can I go show you off to my friends now?” he asked with a smile.

“I’d love to.”

“This weekend was a lot of fun,” you said, yawning as you opened your door to your apartment that night. Jensen nodded and yawned in turn. 

“I’m really glad you came,” he said. “Maybe you can come to another one if you want.”

“Uh, duh. Those panels were awesome. I’ve definitely got some catching up to do,” you said, tossing your bag down and walking over to your phone on the wall showing a message.

“You are so going to be a Dean girl,” said Jensen, watching you tilt your head curiously. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you said. “It’s just I haven’t given out this number in ages. The only people who have it is my modeling agency and even then they always call my cell or email, never this one.”

“Well now I’m intrigued. Let’s take a listen,” he said, walking inside and taking a seat on your kitchen counter.

“Let’s hope it’s fast. Walking Dead comes on in like ten minutes,” you said.

“Do you mind if I hang out and watch with you?” he asked, kicking his feet softly.

“No ya little cutie,” you said with a giggle. “Does someone like that show or something?”

“Yeah. Papa Winchester is on it now so of course I gotta watch,” he said.

“Now that’d be a hell of a crossover,” you said, remembering how to listen to your voicemail. It took a few tries before the message came through.

Hi Y/N. I don’t know if you remember me from Friday. I was the director in that orange baseball hat. I just wanted to say thanks for stepping in and helping us out at the last minute.

“That’s nice of him,” you said, turning to Jensen who looked skeptical.

We saw your resume from your agency and the producing team was wondering if you could stop down Monday at 10. We’re obviously doing this by the seat of our pants but if you could come in and read a few lines just to try for us we’d be forever grateful. Your agency said you just finished a contract and this might be a great opportunity for us all if you’re interested. I understand if you don’t want to, this is pretty far out of your normal realm of work. Thanks again.

“Oh,” you said, turning to look at Jensen.

“It’s your decision, not mine,” said Jensen. “Have you ever acted before?”

“The last acting I did was Girl #4 in my fifth grade play,” you said.

“Do you want to try this?” he asked, offering a soft smile. You had enjoyed the three seconds of doing it before. That really was getting to pretend to be someone else, kind of like when you modeled. But it was different. There was a story to it and you were lying to yourself if you said you didn’t want to at least go and try in the morning. 

“Yeah, I do,” you said, nodding your head.

“We’ll watch zombies another night,” he said. “You’ve got other homework tonight,” he said, standing and moving over to your couch.

“What homework?” you asked, watching as he turned on your TV and quickly got into Netflix.

“Supernatural silly. If you’re going to read for Dean’s love interest, you should watch some more of the show,” he said, patting the spot next to him.

“Do you...want me to get this part?” you asked, walking over and joining him.

“I get to act that I’m falling for a girl while I’m actually falling for the girl that plays her? Why would I ever want that?” he teased.

“I guarantee I’m going to be awful at this tomorrow,” you said, feeling his arm wrap around your shoulders, pulling you into him.

“You won’t know if you don’t take a chance,” he said.

“When it comes to you and chances they’ve worked out so far. I guess we see what happens tomorrow,” you said. Jensen kissed the top of your head and your face began to hurt from the wide smile that had formed. At least until you started paying attention to the episode.

“Are those kids playing Bloody Mary? That scared the crap out of me as a kid,” you said, snuggling a little closer to Jensen.

“This one still creeps me out,” he said. “Obviously we should watch with the lights off.”

“If I get nightmares I blame you Ackles,” you said.

“If you get nightmares, just call me and I’ll pop down and sleep on your couch. Make sure nothing bad gets you,” he said, wrapping both arms around you and squeezing you gently.

“You can always just crash here just in case,” you said, letting him decide if he wanted to stay over.

“Good idea,” he said with a nod. “Now we should be quiet seeing as there’s a ridiculously good looking man on the screen,” he said.

“I’ll let Jared know you think so fondly of him,” you said.

“Shudyup and learn how cocky but good of a guy Dean Winchester can be.”

A/N: Read Part 4 here!

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