#but i always try to make myself write full oneshot stories | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chloeangelic · 6 months

Note

Why does it seem like everything you've put out lately is just trying to rip off netherfeildren? Like the art, the plots, the aesthetics... Especially weird since you used to seem to always hype them up

I went back and forth on responding to this but I’ve decided to because I don’t appreciate having my integrity questioned. I kind of expected that I'd get something like this because there are some thematic similarities between Seeking and SWITBOSH. However, I won’t respond publicly to anything else like this cause I think we’re all very over The Discourse, and tbh it’s a massive fucking insult to accuse me of ripping someone off when I’ve spent seven months writing ca 200k words of fic and developing my own unique style of writing. If you can’t see the difference between two writers, just because they write emotional depth and full sentences, then please read an actual book and not just brainrot fic. I’m gonna properly address everything under the cut - anon domming is back on the menu today.

That being said, because this feels weird and uncomfortable for me and likely for Vic, I’m turning off anons for the time being and I’m taking a posting break to decide whether I want to continue posting here at all or continue posting purely on AO3. I post there anyways under the same name. If you still have a bone to pick with me or my writing, please message me directly. Please do NOT pester Vic about this, I know very well that she does not enjoy The Discourse or any sort of drama. Everyone is sick of the copying discourse - please have some trust in writers’ self awareness.

Firstly, the words “recently” and “plots” should be defined here - I personally don’t see how stepdaddy Joel, pornstar Tim, sex addict Dieter, baby daddy Javi or any of Love Me back is similar to her works at all. The Seeking teaser I posted yesterday was similar to her Pink teasers purely because it had text on a photo - my text wasn’t even from the fic, it was a quote that represented the series as a whole and the quote that finally made the series crystallize in my head. It’s the quote I want people to have in the back of their mind when they go into reading it - it’s from the song that I consider the series theme. Our formatting is not the same. Yes, I have quotes at the beginning of the chapters - my friend sent me a bunch of poems and a couple, I felt were relevant to the story so I wanted to add them somehow. Several writers do this. I stopped putting in previews above the cut cause it was making it difficult for me to write the beginning of the chapters. My masterlist art is the same as, like.. Everyone’s else’s masterlist post - the norm on here is to have an artwork from Pinterest, the title slapped on top and the writer’s name. I literally just loved Pascalisbaby’s masterlist art so much I decided to do it too.

When you say plots, I’m assuming you’re drawing parallels between Seeking what is desirable and Someone’s Wife in the Boat of Someone’s Husband because cheater!Joel (or maybe even Pink cause DDLG, but I’m literally in a DDLG-type dynamic irl and I decided to incorporate it into a fic for once - there were CLEAR ddlg undertones in Love Me Back, it just wasn’t explicit. I also wrote several chapters of Seeking before Pink even came out, and I wrote a cheating + father in law oneshot this summer).

The MC in Seeking is based on myself and my own life, moving away from my parents in order to live with my boyfriend at the time very far away, who ended up being extremely absent and shitty. MC+Jeremiah relationship is based on Adam and Hermine from EXIT, Jeremiah is based on Tony Soprano, Gwen is based on Janice Soprano + a story I heard from my cousin about how his wife let him do all the childcare while she went on a women’s retreat. They are not in a marriage of convenience, the MC doesn’t feel bad about the affair at all, she never pushes him away, and Gwen has no plans on leaving. Sarah and Ellie are both 16 and living with Joel in Seeking. The MC does not have similarities to Sarah like she does in Love Me Back (which was also literally based on my own life) or Someone’s.

MC is a teacher who cheats with Joel - so is the MC in my post outbreak series I wrote many months ago. They're drawn to each other immediately cause I hate slow burn fics and I didn't feel like writing two chapters of him fucking someone else this time around. She goes out intending to cheat, and he thinks it'll sustain him for the next several years. The first thing I thought up in this entire series was Jeremiah - I had his character crystallized in my head for weeks before I planned anything else.

Of course Joel is unhappy in his marriage - neither Vic or myself would write a Joel who cheats for fun, that’s just not something either of us finds interesting. It actually started as a Sopranos AU, but I decided against going that route cause I don’t know enough about white collar crime. Also, if you are familiar with my writing you’ll know I love writing infidelity - it shouldn’t be a surprise that I’m writing a series with this as the central theme. The central question for Seeking is when is it okay to cheat? That’s what the entire fic is about. It’s not about him finding the love of his life after marrying someone else (like the summary of Someone’s), it’s about two instances of cheating and how we justify those two scenarios. Of course it has a happy ending - I’ve used up my non-happy ending quota for the year.

I’m not sure what you mean by aesthetics - Vic actually edits really nice graphics for all of her Mando chapters. She spends a bunch of time on those, and you’re doing a disservice to her by overlooking how unique her artwork is and how much effort it takes. She also made really cool teasers for Pink. I’m way too lazy for any of that, I just slam a moodboard together. I started doing 3 slot moodboards cause the 6-7 slot ones were a hassle. The fact that only art pieces are used in this series is half coincidence, half me being sick of trying to fit Pedro pics into the moodboards when the colors are often wrong.

I literally texted with her when I planned this series, saying I was afraid people would accuse it of being a ripoff of Someone’s, purely due to the Joel infidelity + uninterested wife factor, and she did not think the overall plot was similar enough to be of concern. I still hype her up, she just doesn’t post as often now so I don’t reblog as often, that’s pretty simple. I’ve also asked Iris, my editor, SEVERAL TIMES if it reads too similar to Someone’s or anything Vic has written - she is extremely familiar with both of our works and she did not think so. What exactly am I supposed to do when I’ve gotten the green light from everyone?

This specific anon didn’t mention the actual writing, though, which is funny and it makes sense because I don’t write like Vic and I don’t try to. Her vocabulary is way larger than mine, the diction and syntax are not similar at all. She actually uses metaphors, I use them very rarely and only when it’s super dramatic. My writing isn’t poetic, it’s not flowery, it’s not formal - it’s literally just how I think inside my own head. When I read my own writing, I imagine Charles Gross doing a dramatic reading. I learn like one new word every month and eventually I’ll add it to my writing when it’s something I’m confident using irl. She has a lot of depth to her fics, I also try to write with emotional depth - I’m sorry if that’s unfamiliar in a landscape of dbf porn with no plot and 5 word sentences (I’m shading my own first series here). Seeking reads more similar to the first series I ever wrote, which I never posted, than anything else I’ve written. Half of Seeking is also straight up daydreaming sequences cause that’s literally how I think - the MC lives a boring life and daydreams, so do I.

I’ve learned a ton from reading Vic’s stuff - I don’t read that much irl cause I rarely find English novels captivating, but her writing has really made an impression on me. I talk constantly about how much her writing makes me cry, and it really does. Reading her stuff has absolutely influenced me to be more confident about weaving in actions and little plot points that are more vulnerable and personal to myself, and that adds a lot of depth it otherwise wouldn’t. I’m very inspired by her, of course I am - but I know the difference between being inspired and trying to leech.

I’m sorry my writing style has developed. I’m sorry I no longer write like I did in April, with matter-of-factly short sentences and little emotional depth. I have short series and long series because some plots deserve more emotional depth and some don’t need it. I wouldn’t bother writing anymore if all I did was shady lawyer Joel or Father Joel and I never improved.

If you don’t enjoy my writing, please just unfollow. I’ve seen other fics on this platform that read similar to mine, some that have exactly the same plot points/origin stories, and at no point have I thought they were ripping me off. At some point, this specific fandom needs to realize that it’s possible for two writers to have similar ideas without it being one person copying the other. My personal opinion is that if you copy someone’s plot, you won’t be able to execute it well because you don’t have the ideas necessary to actually flesh it out. If you’re familiar with my writing, you know damn well I’m capable of coming up with my own ideas and plots. I feel zero need to rip other people's in order to gain traction - I have enough followers and idgaf how many notes anything gets. Please don’t overestimate my ability to give a fuck about my popularity in this fandom.

Anyways, thanks for making me want to vomit, anon, you truly made me feel like shit today and I hope you have a great night! I’m not sure how much I’ll be checking tumblr for a while so feel free to message me on discord under the same name.

#chloe answers

41 notes · View notes

tarabyte3 · 20 days

Text

Fic Updates

It's been a while soo....

I Want You to Show Me Weak — As I've stated before, there are only 2 chapters left in the entire fic. I'm going to be finishing both of them before I post chapter 26. Then I'll be posting chapter 27 the next day. Gonna end the fic with a bang 😏 I have everything outlined and thought out, I just have to finish writing it (I'm very excited about what I have planned/written for the final chapter, which includes the ending). Though I will admit, it's been difficult to write knowing I'll be saying goodbye to this story. I'll miss my boys SO much 😭, as well as this version of Kino x Reader, but I want to finish it for myself and for all of you! Besides, there's always the possibility of oneshots set in this universe in the future AND I'm not done writing for Kino. Not even close! I have no date estimate at the moment, but I'm trying to give this one my full attention so 🤞

The Devil Makes Us Sin — Once Show Me Weak is done, I'm going to give this one my full attention for a while. (Though, to be honest, even though I'm trying to focus on finishing Kino first, I still keep this document open and regularly pop in to write a paragraph or two. What can I say, David is VERY fun to write for 😏, I love him, and I must follow the serotonin). The next few chapters will be shorter so they should go quickly, and I already have around the next 4 of them half written (I actually have about ~25k of future stuff written last time I checked, including parts of chapters MUCH further down the road 😅).

Other Wips

While my focus has been on my ongoing stories, I do have a few other WIPs I have actual content written for! So here's an update on those as well. For fun.

Personal Trainer!Kino x Reader Modern AU — I have the beginning of this story and a few scenes written, and SO many notes for it. (My relationship with my trainer is fantastic. He's 50% big brother energy, 50% wingman energy, but he says THE most out of pocket shit so I immediately write it down after my sessions. Because him saying it does nothing for me, but imagining Kino saying it?? 😵‍💫🫠🥵) It will probably end up ~5 chapters total. Probably.

And Your Heart, Love, Has Such Darkness (David x Reader smutty Oneshot) — I started this one a year ago because I wrote something for TDMUS that didn't quite fit, but I liked it enough to keep it and make it its own thing. It's over half done right now, so it will likely be the next oneshot I post.

I Didn't Want to Hurt You, but You're Pretty When You Cry (Dark!David x Reader) — I think this one will end up about 3 chapters long and will contain a lot of content warnings. It's going to be more horror focused (with splashes of dark humor because I cannot help myself). I adore the opening chunk I've written. It gave me goosebumps.

Secret Andy Blorbo x Reader Oneshot — This one started as a joke on Discord about an Andy blorbo that is not only incredibly niche/unknown, but is actively not attractive (one of the very rare times Andy Serkis does nothing for me. In fact, when I see him, my vagina makes the windows shutdown noise). Except I made the mistake of saying, "I want to try to write for this character as a fun challenge just so I can sexually confuse everyone." And it, uh, spiraled from there and made me rethink my entire stance on this character (thank you for not only indulging me, Hannah, but encouraging me and giving me more ideas 💖 I loved [redacted] thirst day in TNBF)

Halsin x Tav — That's right, I'm writing for the sexy druid. It'll be 2 chapters, and it's about a third of the way finished. This Tav will be a human fighter, but is otherwise written more like a Reader Insert. (Side note: going back to 3rd person POV after writing a lot of 2nd person POV is harder than I imagined 🙃)

Paz Vizsla x Mando!Reader Oneshot — That's right, I'm also writing for the big Mandalorian. It's about a third of the way finished as well. (These last 2 are actually a little intimidating because the fandoms are MUCH larger, but I need to get them out sooo fuck it, it's happening.)

So as you can see, even though I haven't posted very much outside of Liam Black, I'm still writing a lot. Apparently I just have commitment issues and a lot of ✨thots✨ 😌💖

#fic update #my wips #wip wednesday #i want you to show me weak update #the devil makes us sin update #x reader

14 notes · View notes

nogenrealldrama · 4 months

Note

Hi! Love the excerpts of your work that you've shared here. Do you have any advice for someone just starting to dip their toes into writing? Fanfic, or just generally? Thanks! :)

First of all thank you for reading and I'm so, so happy you liked my snippets :D

Second of all: Ummm giant disclaimer that I have almost nothing actually published to my name, so altogether I also consider myself a new writer. But I love to rant about writing anyway so here goes:

Don't listen too much to writing advice. When I first tried writing, I would spend way too much time on writing advice blogs. Many of them aren't that good, to be quite honest. And even for the good ones, there is such a thing as right advice given at the wrong time, or at the wrong place in your writing journey. If you're an overthinker, reading too much advice can make you start worrying about small things, and/or not have the confidence to try something wild but important on your own. Frankly, all it really comes down to is: 1) Having a vision, 2) Writing the vision down, 3) Noticing the ways your writing falls short of the vision, and 4) Tweaking things until they reach the level of imperfection you can personally live with. For me, writing advice is best searched for to apply to the specific issues I have in Steps 3 and 4. I apply any advice only in so far as it helps me get closer to the vision in my head. putting the rest under a cut because it got long - sorry!

2. Be uncompromising about writing things that bring you joy.

Kind of similar to #1, but it's doubly important when you're really just starting out. Or when you've been writing a while but always find it hard to begin. Double that importance again when what you're writing is fanfiction, because then you really have no genre definitions or deadlines or publishers or any other actual reason to compromise your vision. You already have some amazing ideas, and for each idea there is probably a feeling or a vibe or a message that you want to capture. Give yourself time to get lost in that feeling, to really indulge in it. And then write it down in its full glory, even the parts that might make you cringe a little from how dramatic or vulnerable they are. If there is a way to make your story more indulgent, do it. Because it will keep you writing. And if you really think it's too much, you can always edit stuff out before publication. You know, after you've actually written the story down. The thing that made me start writing in the first place was a giant longfic/possibly trilogy Canon Divergence rarepair plot idea that is still not finished, and on paper that's pretty much the last thing one should start their writing journey with. But if I stopped myself from writing that in favour of forcing out some oneshots, I never would've written anything at all. Give yourself permission to write exactly and only the ideas that make you excited to write.

3. Bonus advice that might or might not be useful to you, but it was ground-breaking in helping me write the way I want to write - in this excellent post, @little-hermit-crab56 makes a point that dialogue is a dance. I'd take it further/in a slightly different direction and say that storytelling as a whole is a dance. Juts like a dance, dialogue feels most dynamic when you allow it to go back and forth a little, to have short breaks and pauses here and there. I think the same can apply to an action sequence, or a bit of internal monologue, or an emotional trajectory of a whole scene. Just like a dance, it's less about the exact movements (e.g. describing precisely what happens in an action scene) and more about the rhythm of the back and forth (e.g. describing just enough to let the reader know that the protagonist is winning, but then - oh no! - the villain has the upper hand, but then the protagonist gets lucky and they're winning again). I swear that with enough skill to set up the right back-and-forth, even a character tying their shoelaces for a page and a half will feel dynamic. You can alter that rhythm, make it faster or slower, more dominated by "ups" or "downs", but even a little contrast can elevate a plot beat or an emotion more than I had initially thought possible. Of course, there is no need to simplify the "ups" to being good and "downs" to being bad - the back and the forth can both be morally grey or both similarly convenient/inconvenient to the protagonist. They just need to be meaningfully different. You can zoom this out even more and apply the back-and-forth to character arcs, or dynamics between characters, or entire plots. (The three act plot structure is, IMO, simply a choreography for a satisfying back-and-forth). In a longer work, you can have many "dancers" doing their own back-and-forth simultaneously, at multiple levels of the story structure. In a oneshot, you can have one or several backs-and-forths distilled to the most dramatic steps of the dance. In my experience, the whole thing gets quite addictive once you start seeing it.

#ah the irony of writing advice that advises you to disregard writing advice #ah the way how every time a writer gives this advice they must make a joke about how ironic it is #ah the way that writers make fun of other writers through the ever-escalating layers of excessively self-aware irony #i'll shut up now #I'm so sorry this ask got so long and lecture-like #hope some of it is helpful #asks #writing #writeblr #writing tips #writing advice #fanfiction

17 notes · View notes

ectogeo-rebubbles · 18 days

Note

I have kind of a niche Garashir fic idea I want to write but I’ve never posted anything publicly before, so I am nervous. But I can’t seem to get over the idea? You’re one of my favorite fic writers, any advice? 💕🥺

Ooooh, you gotta try to write it!!! I always love to indulge my new ideas that are driving me insane as soon as I can hehe (because part of writing often has to be done after the initial idea no longer excites you quite the same way).

I like that you said it’s a niche idea, too! I do enjoy most of the common fanon tropes and worldbuilding, but it’s always so refreshing when people add something brand new to the Garashir body of literature. And the nicher and stranger the better, in my opinion!! One thing about writing something niche is that maybe it won’t get the same amount of attention as quickly as something that has broader appeal, HOWEVER... I can tell you from experience that when your niche stuff does find its audience (which may take patience and persistence) that audience will likely go absolutely WILD for it. And I always find that very rewarding <3

Is the reason you haven't started yet because you don't quite know how to start? If that's the case, I would recommend writing an outline first. I even sometimes will outline really short oneshots lol, not because I think I really need to, but because that way i at least have a good record of my idea and ALSO because sometimes I can trick myself into just starting to write by taking notes on in outline format until I get to the part I'm REALLY excited about, at which point I realize I'm just writing full sentences instead of notes and I just let it flow from there and go back to fix the beginning later. XD You could also just try to summarize the plot for a friend, that often reveals to me where any structural issues are tripping me up, and identifies what I need to think about more before I set words down on the page.

Idk if you haven't written before or if you just haven't posted any of it, but I want you to know that a few years ago, when I was easing myself back into writing, I worked on writing like 3 or 4 different garashir fic ideas privately before I actually figured out which idea I wanted to write all the way to the end and actually post. Most of those first wips never got posted (and my wip graveyard is still massive and always growing lol) and that's for the best bc I either got bored of the idea or could not yet achieve the story in the way I wanted to. Which is NOT to tell you that this is inevitable or that you should let your inner editor shut you down, but I just want you to know that it's perfectly okay and normal to, like, have to noodle around a bit before you've written something you're happy with.

Speaking of your inner editor, you gotta tune them out while writing a first draft. Don't even worry if the sentence makes sense, just get the words out, and then get the next words out, and then the next... If there is something stopping you from writing the next sentence (a name you need to make up, or something you need to research, or uncertainty about what a character would be doing, or even if you are just blanking on a word) and you are trying to maintain a flow of writing, then write a note for yourself (e.g, "[insert title of a Cardassian novel here]" or "[Julian makes some kind of expression. Surprise? Anger? idk]" or "[synonym for sinister, bc I've used sinister three times this fic already]") and then MOVE ON. You can go back in and fill in those blanks later.

Also, I really really really really like the writing advice of thinking of your first draft as your worst draft or stupidest draft. It's so true and it helps take the pressure off. One related amazing thing about writing star trek fanfic is that if ever you begin to doubt yourself, you can just fondly think about a beloved episode of Star Trek where something very silly or buckwild happens in a very contrived way, and then remind yourself that people LOVE that episode anyway. This is a genuine way that I have reminded myself not to be so harsh on my own writing lmao.

I really working with beta readers, but I know that's not something everyone enjoys and it's def not required. Still, a beta reader can give feedback on your writing to make it clearer, and they'll likely become invested in your fic and will cheer you on, and if it’s longer than a oneshot you can have someone to talk it through with during the writing process. But it might be hard to find someone you work well with and everyone’s beta reading style is a lil different, so I recommend always being very clear about what kind of feedback you want from them (grammar/typos, plot structure, clarity, brainstorming ideas for how to fix this plothole, does this one specific line of dialogue work, etc! whatever aspects you are uncertain about and want help with for that specific fic). And you should know that it’s okay to not take someone's recommendations too, it’s ultimately your fic, so anyone giving you feedback should just be trying to help you achieve your own vision. Still, even in those cases where you don't go along exactly with their idea for what to change, knowing what parts confused them can help you figure out how to get your vision across more clearly.

If you think concrit might actually be demotivational and intimidating (totally get that, back in high school I actually solicited concrit on my fics publicly, as was the custom back then, and received some critiques from some truly well-meaning friends, and the experience STILL rattled me so bad that it turned me off writing for awhile), or if the process of finding someone to beta read sounds overwhelming, I’d recommend that you instead just find a trusted friend who is willing to read over the completed draft, with the understanding that they must simply give you a sanity check and then tell you yep that’s good! Cannot stress enough the power of encouragement and support and having someone hype you up. ^_^

If you are too nervous to post it under your own name, you can post it to the Anonymous collection on ao3. This is a reversible process, so if you want to reattach your username to your fic later then you can!

Anyway, feel free to send follow up questions about any of this or let me know if there's an aspect of writing I didn't mention that is what you're actually stuck on. I hope this helps and good luck and HAVE FUN! Have fun is actually the most important writing advice haha.

(P.S., anon, if you want me to beta read a draft of a oneshot or at least look over a chapter or two if it's multichapter, I am down to do so, just DM me. If not that's fine too, I'm just so so flattered that you reached out to me and I want to encourage you in any way I can! <3)

#asks

7 notes · View notes

thekuraning · 26 days

Note

fic writing asks : 17 and 27, 28?

hope you’re doing well!! I’m just about to finally catch up with the latest chapter of moving on in a maelstrom (I haven’t checked my ao3 inbox for updates in a hot minute!!), thank you as ever for writing!

WASABI THANK YOU FOR SENDING im hanging in there i hope youre doing good too <3 and i hope you enjoy the latest chapter grelhbqughoeiqg

:') i talk a lot gomen

17. talk about your writing and editing process

so i'm definitely not the kind of person who sits down and outlines their story and all the plot points or does a ton of planning (kind of a bad habit probably!!) and mostly my fics comes from some broad concepts or ideas, vibes, or any sort of vivid scene I imagine up while im daydreaming on the way to work, and then I just kind of run with it. Actually I think from all the fics I've actually tried to follow an outline for in the past, only one has gotten past a handful of chapters (that would be Turning Point, which is shockingly complete!)

And like the scenes or vibes or ideas aren't always related to major plot points or anything either, they're just character moments and either a) do not need backstory to explain the situation, so they get to be a oneshot, or b) are VERY PARTICULAR about the backstory of the Scene and then they end up a full-fledged novella/novel/epic.

So like for example, I started on Maelstrom fic for a very specific scene with a very specific character--and you might expect it to be related to the main villain! Except I didn't even have a design for him until the day I sat down to write chapter 5 (which came to me in a caffeine-fueled fever dream) and wasn't even sure what his NEXT ability would be until chapter 8. Yeah he's the main antagonist. But this entire fic. This entire damn fic. Is a stepping stone. To a scene where Yuri is going insane under house arrest and Barnaby goes to visit him. And it's the funniest fucking thing in my head. Like I want to be so clear this is just an elaborate slide puzzle to a one-paragraph gag and I have no idea if the set-up is even worth it. But then once I get started writing things kind of start to fall into place like dominoes because I spend a lot of time overthinking the world building and the canon orz

Anyways as for editing uhhhh well!!! You have probably noticed!! I have SO MANY TYPOS IN MY CHAPTERS!!! My cat hears me say so many swears after chapters are posted :( I tend to be like constantly reading and rereading and editing... the first half of a chapter. The further I go the more excited I get to post! And the less I end up reading. So uhhh yeah if anyone ever goes back to read any fic I've ever posted EVER and you're like huh I don't remember that or huh I thought it was different yeah. yeah it was. I edited it 3 months later when I reread part and realized I had 15 typos, non-sequitors, and the worst sentence composition known to man OTL

27. your favorite part of the writing process

getting experimental with it! :') i like fucking around with imagery and description and pacing to try and see what kind of vibes i can squeeze out of something. actually i forget how long ago it was but i think my buddy isleofair sent an ask once where I went on a rant about what makes a slow burn a slow burn and ever since then I've REALLY wanted to try and write a slow burn that diagetically takes place in like. one or two hours. i have no idea how it would work but i think it would be really fun to try.

otherwise i think my favorite thing is like world building but through the little background details, like trying to squish in regional dialects or brands or in-universe entertainment franchises. I was really fucking proud of myself for Barnaby's Gatorade ad reel and his promotional coffee in Maelstrom lmfaooo or like getting so fucky with Proton's slang in my pokemon fics. Still trying to figure out how to write an entire oneshot about no one understanding what he means when he says "freezycaff."

28. your least favorite part of the writing process

>:( what do you MEAN I have to have a coherent plot!!! What do you MEAN I should probably plan to avoid plotholes!!! What do you MEAN i have to write through writer's block or take breaks when I burn out creatively!!!!! NO STOPPING ONLY VIBES ONLY GOOFS AND GAFFS!!! ONLY FICS!!!

On a more serious note. My least favorite part really is since I don't do a lot of planning beforehand :( sometimes all I got be them vibes, and getting from point a to point b can be like pulling teeth if I'm not like. manic. A lot of times I feel like I have a big picture with a lot of missing little pieces, and sometrimes I just can't figure out a satisfying way to get over it. Then the perma-hiatus hammer comes out UmU RIP in pepperonis dead fics from 2018.

Thank u again for sending!! <3

#wasabicouscous #kurasays #ask game #zubat fangs actually came about from 4 scene ideas #the first was proton stabbing his mom and the 2nd was mewtwo's escape from cinnabar #the next one is slowpoke well and then after that is radio tower....#just gotta push through fucking SILPH #hhhgggg fuckin silph bein a roadblock n such grrrrrr

5 notes · View notes

twilightarc-gm · 8 months

Text

tag someone you want to get to know better

🧡Very honored and loved to be tagged by @iri-vail and @incarnadinedreams 🧡

Favorite color/s: In nature; orange. In clothing and personal style; purple. In general or for the vibes; red. Color combo; orange and purple, followed close second of purple and red.

Last song: Punching Bag by Set it Off is so catchy I have been listening to it alot. 🎶So say goodbye / to your mister nice guy / you got your wish / he's rotting in hell🎵

Last movie: The second spiderverse movie. It was too fast for me, but it seemed cool. Good vibes. I do enjoy animation and stylized cg over live action, so I am glad these movies are doing so well, but I think this is it for me on watching any more.

Currently watching: Just finished binge watching The Good Place. An extremely solid show. Well rounded, funny, great acting. Cathartic ending. Cried about it a lot thinking of the message it's trying to convey. Eleanor and Michael were my favorites, but that's no surprise that I like the Arizona trashbag and the fire squid demon in a Ted Dansen suit.

Currently reading: Strange Tales from a Chinese Studio, by Pu Songling. And as always, Modao Zushi every time I have to check something for my donghua rewatch. And slowly catching up with The road to reunion by Onomatopoetikon (prequel movie xmen ff)

Currently working on: Still in the process of my Extensive Note Taking rewatch of the Founder of Diabolism (mdzs) donghua. I am mostly done with notes up to s2, but I binged s3 again because I wanted to write instead of take notes (WIP doc available on the CX Heaven discord). s3 continues to make me so angry I am not sure how I'll convince myself to do the full note taking. Comparing each episode to relevant novel sections is also emotionally taxing, in the sheer damage that the donghua does to the Twin Heroes relationship... so! This will be a while... but this an underlying project for my fem-mxy!wwx fic which ... may... take the place of "mainfic" for ever getting published? Jury is still out on that.

Current obsession: MDZS themed brainrot continues to make a marshy bog of my psyche. Chengxian, Twin Heroes, and Jiang Cheng in that order, but surprisingly I seem to be writing and thinking more about WWX in all my WIPs and I just noticed? Predominately, I have been writing these stories from his perspective 😅 Zoids au, naga!jc au, majority of fem!mxy au, jc wolfcurse post-canon, White Hair Wuxian smutty oneshot... Maybe it's just easier to write him because the novel is a baseline but also I think I understand and respect his multiverse shidivision.

As always, ignore me if you already did this and no worries if you're not up for sharing 😘 Tagging @ohmybookshelves @fanfictiongreenirises @sonik-kun @limonath @thestarlitrose @elliekayy @ruthlesscalculuss @miss-fiery @sailuncharted

#tag game #so-relatable #twi posts

14 notes · View notes

mxehmzari · 11 months

Text

Tolerate it

“ While you were out building other worlds, where was I? Where's that man who'd throw blankets over my barbed wire? I made you my temple, my mural, my sky Now I'm begging for footnotes in the story of your life.”

༉‧₊˚. Warnings : none?

༊*·˚ Tags : oneshot, angst?, Sebastian, black butler, Kuroshitsuji, gender-neutral reader, not proofread

Note : A fanfic I wrote instead of studying, inspired by Tolerate it by Taylor Swift. It's my first time writing a fic and English is not my first language, so please bear with me.

As I watch him run his hands through his hair, grumbling about the conversation that we just had a few whiles back, it was obvious that he was upset. Mad even.

Where did this squabble even start? As far as I can recall, he came home again today at an ungodly pleasing time, being tired and pent-up about this reoccurring habit, I have finally spoken up about it.

Which he did not appreciate, not even one bit.

We used to handle disagreements so well, well…used too as time goes by, came with hurdles between us that shaken our bond. This makes me ponder, was there ever a bond in the first place?

“ What do you want me to do about it?”

Was all of this even worth it? Can this even be salvaged? All of this is coming down on to me, rethinking all the times he's been like this. Refusing to make amends. Refusing to take fault. To communicate.

“ I don't know. What do you want? “

Sebastian does not like it when I talk back. In every 'misunderstandings' that we have, he always makes it seem like everything was my fault. That I was to blame.

“ You wanted this. “ I did? I wanted this?

“ I never asked for this. I never asked for your absence, for your lack of affection. I never asked for neglect! “

With every word that comes out of my mouth, I hold myself back from raising my voice, for I know that it would only make things worse.

“ I do not know what you're talking about. I have given you everything you wanted, everything you've wished for. What else do you want?”

What else do I want? You. I want you. Though I can not say that aloud for my pride is holding me down. To add context, Sebastian has been out a lot these past few weeks. I understand it, I really do. Being a butler is no easy job, but you see. . . On his days off, he'd rather stay out than return, or sometimes he'd rather not go back home at all. I miss him, and for him to act as if it does not affect him one bit answers my debate.

“ I can't do this anymore.” I leave my place and enter my, our bedroom and grabbed a bag. I started packing my clothes and all of my other essentials, while he just stands there in disbelief.

“ You can't do what exactly? “ Unlike before, his voice and tone was less sharp and harsh.

“ Sebastian, I can't continue living like this anymore. We agreed on sticking on each other's side, and you go on leaving me all alone in this damn house. You don't even bother on coming home, either.”

I stood up, zipping my bag, it was full to the brim. Stepping out of the room, I gather as much courage, looking at this damn demon's eyes. God. I miss him. I miss him, but this is too much. It's getting too painful.

“ Sebastian. I think. . . This is for the best.”

“ Do what your heart desires. Leave.”

He remained stoic. Does it hurt him as much as it hurts me? Does he really not want this in the first place? Was I a fool into thinking that loving a demon would actually be alright? He's a demon, for fuck's sake! Was he just tolerating me? I barely even knew who he was, but I was contented. I was contented with what we have. What he had. I did not love him less.

“ I wish you well, Sebastian. Take care.” I try my hardest to not break down on the spot, to not run back to his arms and sob, to not hysterically cry on the ground. I turned around and grabbed my bag.

He did not utter a word. As I stepped out, he closed the door and with a click the door was locked.

#black butler x reader #sebastian michaelis #sebastian x y/n #kuroshitsuji x reader #kuroshitsuji #fanfiction #x reader #gender neutral reader #black butler x you #black butler x y/n #sebastian x reader #angst #no happy ending #taylor swift #anime fanfic #fanfic #headcanons #hc

31 notes · View notes

heartbreak-sandwich · 5 months

Text

20 Questions For Fic Writers:

Thank you sm for tagging me, @lithium80sblog 💕 I always love doing these!!

1) How many works do you have on AO3? I currently have seven here!

2) What's your total AO3 word count? 29,395

3) What fandoms do you write for? Stranger Things ✨

4) What are your top five fics by kudos? 1. Animal Magnetism 2. He's the Bad Guy 3. Imagine Pleasure Dom Eddie Munson... 4. Echoes of Redemption: Love and Shadows in Hawkins 5. Red Letters to Nowhere

5) Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? YES!!! If I see them, I will absolutely respond. I love receiving feedback on my writing, and it means the world when someone takes their time to leave comments on my fics 💕

6) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hmmm I have quite a few wips, so I think the angstiest ending left up in the air is probably Full Circle Warnings.

7) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? It's a mild ending to a oneshot because my longer fics are still in progress, but probably He's the Bad Guy.

8) Do you get hate on fics? I have been really fortunate and have never received hate on any of my fics, thankfully.

9) Do you write smut? If so, what kinds? At this point, I might consider it my specialty lmao. I don't limit myself much in the smut department, so I would say most kinds.

10) Do you write crossovers? Sometimes! I have written a Jeniffer's Body AU fic where Billy Hargrove plays the role of Jennifer. It's one of my favorites, and you can find it here ❤️‍🔥

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.

12) Have you ever had a fic translated? Also not to my knowledge.

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before? I haven't, but I would be willing to try!

14) What's your all time favorite ship? I'm a self shipper, and I'm not sorry. 🤭 Probably Billy Hargrove x Me, if I'm being totally honest.

15) What's a WIP that you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Sometimes I have doubts about my first baby, Echoes of Redemption, but I keep telling myself I'll get there.

16) What are your writing strengths? This is a good question. I don't really know? I think I try to tie in real canon moments or events with vivid descriptions to keep up the immersion, no matter how small they might be.

17) What are your writing weaknesses? Impatience for sure. I'm too excited to finish the story or the blurb or whatever, and I have had some pretty weak endings and missed some good opportunities for tying things up.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? My thoughts are do it if you can! I've never done it, but if I do, I want to make sure to research well and make it as realistic and correct as possible.

19) First fandom you wrote for? Okay...this was a LONG time ago, but the first fandom I ever wrote for was DeGrassi, and it was because The N was having a contest where people would write a short episode for the show and send them in to be featured on TV, and.....I was 9, and I did not win lmao.

20) Favorite fic you've written? This is a hard question. I think I'll have to say it's a toss up between You Made a Fool of Death With Your Beauty and Red Letters to Nowhere (even though that one's still a wip).

No pressure tags 💕 @mrprettywhenhecries @b1tchy3lf @stalactitekilla @destroya-hargrove @castlexofxglass @battymunson @bettyfrommars @cooliestghouliest @reidsbtch and anyone else who wants to!!

#thank u for tagging me!!#tag games #fanfic writer #fanfic writing #stranger things fics #billy hargrove fics #eddie munson fics #a bunch of good stuff #this was fun fr #20 questions tag

8 notes · View notes

ijuststareatstuffhereok89 · 19 days

Note

for fanfic writer asks game

😅🥺🤡✍️🍦🍆❌🧐🏆🎃🎯🎉📚🤯💥

😅 What's a story or scene you've created that you're a smidge embarrassed exists? So in high school and college (like 500 years ago in the 2000s before we knew what a cunt JK Terfling was) I wrote Harry Potter fanfic, and I once wrote a 120k word Remus/Tonks/Sirius threesome story that somehow involved no sex or smut whatsoever...and then only after I finished the damn thing did I remember that Tonks and Sirius are biological cousins. Ooops?

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels? Goodbyes. They make me weep every time.

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh? This whole fic, which I wrote stoned for my 1k follower acknowledgement.

✍️ Do you have a beta reader? Just time, dearie. I work alone.

🍦 What's the sweetest fic you've created so far? Probably THIS ONE, a companion oneshot to my mega-series.

🍆 Do you write the spicy stuffs? If so, what's your most popular nsfw fic? Of course I do! Dechire is my nastiest piece of filth yet, and it's probably my most popular thus far. It's on hiatus, but I am in the process of outlining some future chapters so it can continue by summer.

❌ What's a trope you will never write? Probably Mafia AUs. I enjoy reading them well enough and some writers out there put out some fabulous works around the genre. I myself don't think I could remove my mind that far from canon to write it. Like, for some reason I need to have a rational Point-A-to-Point-B path in my head that makes sense for how the canon characters got "here," and I just can't make those connections between any of the Avengers and the mob.

I also can't do incest or stepcest. It's just a bridge too far, man.

🧐 Do you spend much time researching for your stories? It depends. I always try to get locations accurate if they're on Earth, so I'll do research on cities, street names, and climates. Once in awhile I'll check and see if a canonical fact about a character is real or just something I recall from another fic (I forgot that Steve canonically doesn't get drunk because of his serum).

🏆 What's your most popular fic? I can't really gauge that, because I'm not a popular writer at all. I'm kind of a pathetic little writer on here. An average fic chapter gets between 30-50 interactions at best, and my oneshots only fare better once in a while. I'd say overall these two are the most popular: THIS ONE got enough love to get a full story, and THIS ONE struck a lot of peoples' fancies recently.

🎃 Do you write fics for certain holidays? Which is your favorite holiday inspired fic? I do Secret Santas and holiday tradesies. I like THIS ONE, it's very short (one of my shortest) but it's also a simple, sweet favorite.

🎯 Have any of your readers accurately guessed major plot points? Care to share which? One of my readers guessed that the Y/N of Beauty & the Snake Prince would **SPOILERS** fake her death and leave Asgard to wait for Loki to find her **SPOILERS END** about halfway through, after the villain is introduced

🎉 What leads you to consider a fic a success? Interactions, particularly reblogs. Also, if someone loves my stories enough to drop a message I feel honored. If enough people ask for a oneshot to be continued, I also find that to be an exceptional compliment. Again, I don't think I'd know what it's like to actually be a success yet.

📚 Would you ever want to turn writing into a career? In an ideal world? Um, fuck yeah.

🤯What's a genre you struggle with as a writer (ex. romance, action, etc.)? I still think I kind of suck at smut, even though I'm getting better. I also have a hard time writing horror, because I hate being afraid. I'm a weenie like that.

💥How do you feel about criticism? It has to come from a place of sincerity, but if it does, I happily take and consider critique.

#ask game #fanfic asks

2 notes · View notes

weekend-whip · 3 months

Text

-20 asks for Fic Writers-

hey-lo!! I was tagged by @rainofthetwilight for a fun ask game!! Thank you!! ^-^)/

for tags, any fic writer that comes across this and feels compelled! You have my blessing! Go forth and rant about thy fics!!! Share your words with the world!! Give people new stuff to read!! Flaunt your beautiful achievements!!

. . .

1.How many works do you have on AO3?

19! And counting!

2. What's your total AO3 wordcount?

...791,937 and counting *lies down* (at least most of it is just one fic? Ahaha? ha?)

3. What fandom(s) do you write for?

right now, just ninjago! I wrote for some other fandoms back in the day (with...equally ambitious endeavors) and I initially made my Ao3 account for Definitely Not Ninjago...but, here we are :d

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Born to Be a 21st Century Ninja: 1116

Thank You, For Giving Me Wings: 560

Way of the 21st Century Ninja: 546

Assorted Thoughts and Feelings: 201

Married to the Sea: 161 (which I'm sure will get beat-out by GNL here soon haha)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I TRY, REALLY, MOSTLY, AND USUALLY but sometimes I get too excited and things shift through the cracks (hence why I generally make it a habit to respond to stuff I missed before/around/after a big update! That way it's on my mind!)

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i haven't written it yet I MEAN WHAT it's Married to the Sea. I'm not big on writing overly bad/sad/tragic endings yet

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Paper Plate Moon, the only fic without an existential crisis of some kind (just a slightly lovesick Kai with a smaller scope crisis) Orrr, A Little More Than Sixteen Candles, which is also about Kai! Except he cries. But it's a happy cry!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

(...wait, there's 'kinds' of smut?!?! do i dare even ask)

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Braaaaah I looooooooved crossovers when I was younger. My biggest story from my youth was a crossover. ...I won't be telling you what it is, though. It's part of my dark, mysterious past.

(I also don't count Legacyverse as a crossover, either. It's more of a...fusion! But. Y'know. The roots are there.....)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Only once, and it was the aforementioned crazy crossover fic from above. They were dealt with very swiftly tho :3

12. What's the longest time you've spent working on a fic? And what's the shortest?

Longest that I've finished would be Born to Be; that took me technically almost two full years to write x-x

Shortest would be all the Aftershock oneshots I manage to speedrun in a few scant hours on holidays lmao

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

I've triiiiiiiied a couple times in the past; only one attempt was successful though.

14. What's your all time favourite ship? From all the fandoms?

Destiny's Bounty! Man, I adore that ship so much.

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

THE MERMAID AU or the Jesse Fanseason or all the little prompt things from June '22 that still haunt me to this day or some of legacy!sidestories I should've done ages ago or-

16. What are your writing strengths?

*grabs some stuff from comments* I have strength in character development and providing emotional depth for scenes! *I* also think I write some kickass fight scenes, thank you.

17. What are your writing weaknessess?

BASIC GRAMMAR LMAO and probably using too many commas and ellipses but I am trying to ween myself off of it and incorporate shorter sentences. I always forget to vary up sentence length until the end waaaah

(I also miss typos a lot but I am of the camp that believes it keeps one humble~ *should probably just get a beta reader but hnnng*)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Intimidating

19. First fandom you wrote for?

...something video game related

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

Probably Born to Be just because of how darn big of an achievement it is! and I reread it a lot <3 <3 <3 <3

#tag games #fic tag #other relevant things to be tagged later

4 notes · View notes

notthestarwar · 4 months

Text

Masterpost of my character webs (webweaves of quotes that make me think of them. usually with a very long explanation of my thoughts in one of the reblogs lol)

Sources and text are in alt but pls let me know if there's any mistakes

Fox

Cody Cody 2

Boba

Kix

Obi Wan

Anakin (1 2 3 4 5)

Jango (1 2 3 4 5 6)

Some extra Jango quotes that didnt make it in to an actual web

Clones

Is Jango a father to the clones

RE: my writing

I know I've mentioned this to a few of you but I wanted to make a post explaining and also I'll add this in to the authors notes of what I've got posted on ao3.

I'm pretty unhappy with what I've got posted on ao3, the editing isn't where I want it to be and I've not been at a point where I can fix it. I'm not intending to delete any nor am I gonna make them anonymous/orphan them, but it is my full intention to rewrite my multi chaps and I consider the very early oneshots I wrote to be abandoned. Though I'm not intending to delete any of them and they'll be there, I am considering possibly making a new account and leaving that one to collect dust as an archive I guess.

I wanted to mention this as I know I've got a few unfinished works and I've been saying I'll update them as soon as I'm in the right frame of mind but I haven't got there and now I'm at the point where I want to rewrite what's there before I move on with them (tho tbh I have quite a lot of chapters from those finished and unposted and outlines for each of them.)

So. I don't consider myself to be on hiatus, however, I do intend to rewrite:

Dead from the beginning (mainly editing)

I think love is something that happens to other people (adding some side storylines)

When is a monster not a monster (mainly editing but also moving chapter breaks)

The lost mand'alor (story changes. I intend to delete large bits)

And before i post new chapters I want to do major revisions to:

What the living do rewrite

No children

Talking to the dead

The glass wall

How the living go on living and the dead go on living with them

I've yet to decide what i want to do with the one shots. If I'm only making small edits it'll be on the same work but for the above rewrites/ major revisions In all liklihood I'll be posting them as seperate works possibly on a seperate account (tho I'll link back and you'll be able to see it's me). I'm just not at a point where I can consider starting this yet and so in the meantime I won't be updating any of those wips and they'll be in their messy unedited state for the foreseeable (dead from the beginning in particular lol which is pretty much entirely unedited)

I am gonna try and get back in to writing by maybe working on unposted wips/starting stupid little things that entertain me, as I think that's probably the best way to build on my ability to get me to a point where I can rewrite the above, so depending on how that goes you may see new stuff being posted, but the old ones remain unabandoned and ready to go as soon as my brain gets with the program, just don't expect it any time soon lol

That said. I'm always happy to talk about my work on here and explain where things are heading

Wip list

#new pinned post

2 notes · View notes

imgoingtocrash · 5 months

Note

Hi there, it's your Secret Santa :) Hope you had a wonderful week! Two questions for today: 1) When reading a longer story, do you have a preferred chapter length? 2) What did you think of Andor (the TV show)? What was your favourite story arc?

Hello again!

1. Not particularly? I trust the author to know what’s up lol. Most often I find I like a 20k words with ~5 chapters sort of mid-length oneshot sort of thing. Like it has spaced out beats so that I can take a break between chapters if needed, but overall it’s a singular story, if that makes sense. But I’ve also read 20+ chapter fics that update with 2-5k words every week or so. The fic always dictates that kind of thing for me lol.

2. My feelings toward Andor are…complicated. Which I think is a familiar sentiment in the fandom.

Like, I wanted more Cassian Andor, and I got it, and there are some really great pieces of story and writing in there. The score is absolutely incredible. I hope it makes it into at least a couple of Emmy categories.

(Particularly I watched Luther: The Fallen Sun right around when No Way Out aired, and Andy Serkis has some damn RANGE this year and he deserves some supporting credit for sure for that or Andor.)

The cinematography, direction, and set design is INCREDIBLY unique for modern Star Wars. The choice of not using The Wall and doing as much practical set construction as possible SHOWS. It has an intimacy I think the new movies strayed away from, and it benefits what Andor as a show is trying to do. Not to mention that the RO/Rebelcaptain fandom has feasted on scraps for like 5 years and we actually got a lot to play with from the show. (When/If Cassian says Jyn’s name in s2 I will need to be hospitalized ❤️)

But. The Kenari/Kassa thing. The Maarva and Clem “adoption” situation. Some lack of decent reputation. It’s not really my place to elaborate on some of it as a white person, but I’m keeping up with those conversations in the fandom and I find myself agreeing with a lot of them.

Have I proposed AU ideas about Maarva meeting a RO!Lives team with Cassian? Sure. Do I think the way people are writing Cassian’s POV on the canon is really interesting? So far, hell yeah.

As usual, I’m willing to deal with the sandbox I’ve been given and play around in it, but I do think there’s room for improvement, and I’m an OG Rebelcaptain fan, so I’m always down for anyone that chooses to ignore the rewriting of Cassian’s Festian history. I’ll pretend the show doesn’t exist any day of the week and ride whatever vibes the author is putting down.

But as for favorite story arc, I did really enjoy the prison arc (and the kick in the ass of Cassian building the thing that kills him, because we love an awful full circle moment.)

Also, the beginnings of Rebellion Intelligence! I think Mon gets a bad rap sometimes when it’s like…she and Bail literally clawed this whole thing out of nothing. The Padme BFFs Club had a bunch of credits and a hope and eventually saved the galaxy by being true to what they always believed was right. They rule imo.

Also, my favorite scene is the end where Cassian is like “kill me or recruit me bitch” kebdnsn his eyes are so SAD and WET that’s my poor little meow meow spy 🥹

#on one hand cassian is my boy and i love him but on the other hand andor isn’t the version of him in my head #honestly when it comes to fic/fandom I’m very flexible but when people make points about this show i’m like!!! yeah!#i’m not tagging this bc i don’t want to start anything #idk why anyone would bother but. just in case. not trying to ruin my night lol #asks #anon

2 notes · View notes

nothingtolosebutweight · 2 years

Text

F*CK ME LIKE YOU HATE ME - 1|2

| Pairing: Ivar x Heahmund | Words: ~ 5200 [AO3] | Warnings: Smut , Rough Handling/Sex, Light Choking, Hair Pulling, Sex without Love, Rusty Writing | Summary: Ivar and Heahmund can't get through a day without getting into an argument over something small. Heated discussions between the two have become an everyday occurrence for all bystanders. Everyone is annoyed by it, except the two of them. After all, it's the best kind of foreplay for them. | Notes: I have no excuse for this 😐 After a long time of not posting anything storywise (not counting the Faun tale), I finally managed to pull myself together a bit. It's not that I haven't written anything in the meantime - I've written a lot, and even started a new story, alongside several oneshots and working on my ongoing fics - but somehow I never was able to finish anything because doubt took over my thinking. With this one, I'm trying to get my rusty old writer bones back on track. Don't get too excited in your pants - the real smut will happen in the second part😥

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

The council was already taking forever, stretching Ivar's ever-so-low patience to the limit. The displeasure about the situation was clearly visible in his facial expression. His frown and the downturned corners of his mouth spoke for themselves. Ivar felt no need to pull himself together and wear a friendly mask on the outside. The others in the room didn't have to like him. They depended on him to continue to see their alliance as something needed, not to act against it, so he made no secret of how moronic he found the proposals of the rest of the participants, and deliberately rolled his eyes a bit more when his initial plan was argued against again, to make his opinion known unspokenly.

The longer it dragged on, the more agitated he became. For him, it was almost a complete waste of time. He had already laid out the perfect strategy to overthrow the renegade nobles who threatened King Alfred's leadership, but apparently, the sheer genuineness of his plan failed to be recognized by the others present.

Since returning to England four full moons ago, he had first declared war on Alfred. In glorious battles, Ivar, and the warriors who had followed his lead and vision, had won land for their people and glory for themselves. After two months of bringing terror and despair back to Alfred's shores, a new enemy from the south threatened both his and Alfred's claim to the land. This situation finally motivated him to make a pact with England's young king.

The fact that he had won the earlier battles because his tactics were always well thought out seemed to have been forgotten by now. The nobles who participated in the councils apparently didn't want to admit this, didn't want to be talked out of their opinions by someone so much younger. At least that was what Ivar took as the reason why everything he strategically contributed was answered with counterarguments instead of confirmation.

He hated those endless meetings, hated that discussing political topics with each other were now one of his almost daily duties. By far, he had better things to do. So much better things in fact.

There was only one feature that made the whole situation bearable for him. Something that kept him from simply waging war against everyone and getting rid of them all at once. Alfred certainly thought that the good food, the spacious room he was provided with, or all the other hospitable benefits kept him happy. A grin flitted across Ivar's features as he thought of how foolish and naive the young king was.

None of this meant anything to him because none of these things could ignite that one special spark in him that kept him interested in staying. Ivar would give them up without batting an eye to quench the bloodlust of his warriors and his own thirst for glory and honor. The only thing that really entertained him and kept him in a good mood, that made him stay at Alfred's court and even face the boring meetings with a spark of excitement in him, was nothing else but...

…the Bishop.

The one with the ice-blue eyes, the arrogant aura, and the strength of ten warriors united in him. The man, who had once been his prisoner and who had betrayed him without batting an eye as soon as the opportunity presented itself. Like back in York when he had first seen him fight, the bishop still possessed something in his entire demeanor that fascinated Ivar. It made it easier for him to overcome the hatred and pain that had clung to his heart for a long time after Heahmund's escape.

"Boneless."

His name was pronounced sharply, threateningly. Startled out of his thoughts, Ivar looked up and although he would recognize the voice among hundreds, he looked around pretending to be searching for the one who had spoken up, as if he didn't know it already.

Several eyes were on him, but Ivar wasted no time in paying attention to the unimportant people around him any longer than necessary. Only when his gaze met that of Heahmund did he halt his search, focusing entirely on the bishop, and now he actually had to force himself to maintain a neutral expression and not let the amused grin that wanted to overtake his lips win.

Those present were obviously waiting for an answer to a question he had not been listening to.

Ivar turned his head to Alfred, who looked at him apologetically. Maybe he thought he was bothered by the harsh tone or the use of his byname, but it didn't bother Ivar at all. He also noticed something else the longer his gaze rested on Alfred. Even the usually so level-headed king seemed to be slowly losing his patience due to the back-and-forth that was leading nowhere.

"I would say no. Whatever the question was," Ivar finally said to provide the answer owed, leaning back casually in his chair and folding his arms in front of his chest. His gaze wandered back to Heahmund, who looked at him icily, heaving an audible sigh of disbelief after hearing the cocky response.

"So you have nothing to contribute anymore?" Heahmund raised his voice again, noticeably annoyed by Ivar's casual manner. He rose from his seat, silently pacing a few steps back and forth to give his inner turmoil an outlet, ruffling through his short black hair with one hand. Heahmund felt Ivar's gaze on him the whole time and when he looked directly at him again, the amused grin didn't escape him. It was faint, but it was there, and it made him clench his fist in anger. In his mind, he imagined how he could use it to knock the grin off Ivar's face. The lack of a reply did the rest to make his blood boil.

"I asked you a question." Heahmund straightened up and tried to appear more dominant and demanding, but he already knew that this would certainly not gain him the submissiveness from Ivar that he was hoping for. He was a believer, but not a fool.

"And I heard you. Loud and clear,” Ivar replied as nonchalantly as his posture continued to radiate. He leaned forward and took his cup in his hand, cheekily toasting to Heahmund before bringing it to his lips to take a sip.

"Then answer me!"

"Do I need to remind you that I have already said what the best decision on that matter would be? I see no reason to repeat myself." Ivar looked over at Alfred again and directed his words to him as well, for he was the one who could approve his plan first, and everyone else would be forced to follow his lead. The king could put an end to this dragging discussion, but as usual, he seemed too cowardly to disregard his advisors. They apparently had to be allowed to retain the belief that their say was of value.

"And we've pointed out the holes in your plan. According to our knowledge of the area and the new information our informants have brought back, we have to reconsider your strategy." Once again, an annoyed snort escaped the Christian warrior. He, too, was tired of having to repeat himself. Worse. He already knew that he wouldn't succeed in getting Ivar to cooperate more with his words. There was probably nothing he could have said that would have achieved the desired success. Secretly, he knew that Ivar would counter anything he said on principle; that he was irritating him on purpose.

It had become their game. Hopefully, unnoticed by everyone else and, as Heahmund would only admit in the shelter of his thoughts, also very much to his liking. How much he liked their little bickering was already becoming noticeable in a shameful but also pleasant way. He positioned himself behind his chair, just to be on the safe side, and crossed his arms over the backrest.

"The only thing you were able to point out to me was your inability to think wisely. It's not my fault that you and all the others here, besides, of course, the most noble king, are unable to have two coherent thoughts in a row that actually make sense," Ivar said, winking at Alfred, which caused a series of angry murmurs to erupt among the advisors. It may have been disrespectful, but the English king let it pass without any comment.

"Ivar," Heahmund growled the name, almost shouting it out as he clenched one hand into a fist again and let it hit the back of the chair. "Enough with your childish behavior." Enraged by this insolence, he forgot his initial intention of concealing himself behind the chair and circled around it until he came to a stop in front of it. With both hands, he propped himself up on the tabletop in front of him and literally pierced Ivar with his gaze. The young Viking's resulting eye roll caused Heahmung to punch his palm loudly against the wooden surface and before he could say anything else to verbalize his anger, Ivar raised his right hand as a sign that enough was indeed enough and clicked his tongue at the same time.

"Your grace,” he started, his voice now also louder than before, “please remember your position." Ivar indicated with his raised hand that said position was far beneath his own before he let his gaze wander to Alfred to address his next words directly at him, softer in tone again. "I so often hear that we heathens are uncivilized, but even our dogs in Kattegat are better trained to behave when we have guests in our homes than your council, my dear friend and valued ally." With a twinkle in his eyes that Heahmund could interpret only too well, Ivar finally addressed him again, pointing with his hand to the empty seat he was still standing in front of. "Why don't you just sit down, bishop?"

The mockery dripped from these words, and Heahmund vented his anger at this humiliation by hitting the table again. It was obvious to all that he was on the verge of circling the table and grabbing Ivar by the scruff of the neck.

This time Alfred interrupted them both by standing up and slamming his cup loudly on the table. Immediately Heahmund went down on one knee to show his submission. He knew he had gotten carried away and crossed boundaries. Inwardly he gritted his teeth and he couldn't suppress sending Ivar another ice-cold look.

The young Viking returned the look with a smug grin that was magnified when Heahmund asked, now in a more humble tone, for permission to end the meeting and to continue it at a later time. It was too dark in the room for Ivar to make out Heahmund's body outlines or clothing in detail, but the shift in his stance as the warrior bishop stood back up was a sufficient indication to Ivar that the humiliation had not only pierced Heahmund's pride, but also evoked a different kind of feeling in another part of his body.

The realization that Heahmund was having trouble hiding his arousal also made Ivar restless. He shifted in his seat and lowered his hand into his lap, taking advantage of the fact that everyone was looking at Heahmund. With firm and slow movements, he stroked over the thick fabric of his pants, feeling the outlines of his cock in his palm. He wasn't hard at all, but Ivar could nevertheless feel the spark starting to ignite inside him.

To everyone's relief, Alfred agreed to Heahmund's request.

🙛🙛🙛🙛🙛🙛🙙🙙🙙🙙🙙🙙

Ivar went straight to his room in the west wing of the spacious castle. Once there, he sat down on the pompous armchair in the corner of the room to make himself comfortable. He already knew he wouldn't be alone for long, but he couldn't gauge exactly how long he might have to wait today. The look Heahmund gave him as he passed him to leave the council chamber had been tantamount to a promise. Ivar still felt the fire in the bishop's eyes burning on his skin, and so he hoped that Heahmund wouldn't make him wait too long. It would be a waste of his upset state as well if he tried to calm down first.

The fact that Heahmund no longer had to fear for his life, since he was no longer his prisoner but a valued advisor at Alfred's side, had led to the habit that their arguments became more and more heated over time. Ivar liked it and that their quarrels had gotten more and more physical over time, he liked even more.

Ivar could still remember the first time their argument had gotten out of hand. He remembered it fondly and often reveled in the memory, for it had also been the day when a revelation had come to him. Since then, Ivar knew that he was a real man after all, that all of Sigurd's humiliations weren't true.

It had been a dreary, gray day. Full of rain showers and cold breezes. This alone had already ensured that his mood wasn’t particularly cheerful. Not that he was particularly cheerful in general. Ivar couldn't remember exactly what had caused the initial argument with Heahmund, who seemed also more irritable that day. It surely was something totally unimportant and certainly nothing to discuss to the point of losing one's mind, but they had enjoyed their verbal sparring even back then - even without the special ingredient that became a regular feature by now.

Ivar also failed to remember what nasty or humiliating remark he had thrown at Heahmund that caused him to lose his temper. What he remembered well, however, was the pain in his back when he was pushed against the wall behind him and the pain that this unexpected movement had caused in his legs. He still saw the angry expression on Heahmund's face, the glint in his darkened eyes. He had looked threatening, like a predator shortly before his deadly attack.

The pain in his body hadn't completely subsided when Heahmund had already grabbed him by the upper arms to yank him around. He had instinctively turned his head to the side. Not a second too late, because shortly after he could already feel the bishop's body weight pressing against his back, and a hand burying itself painfully in a tuft of his hair, pressing his face harder against the stone wall. The suddenness of the change of events and all the waves of pain had taken his breath away for a moment. Ivar remembered how surprised he had been, shaken by a coughing fit from swallowed air and unable to counteract properly to free himself from this humiliating grip.

He had tried to brace himself against the wall with his hands to prevent his cheek from being pressed even further into the cold stone, but the weakness in his legs made it impossible for him to push himself up against Heahmund. It would have caused too much pressure in his legs and the danger of breaking a bone would have been too high. Instead, he tried to threaten Heahmund by reminding him, in a biting tone that didn't reveal his inner turmoil, that Alfred wouldn't be pleased with this behavior.

It had certainly not been the best tactic to utter more threats and insults at the man who had the upper hand. How unimpressed Heahmund had been with his words was evident from the way he reacted. A dark and threatening-sounding laugh was the first reaction, followed by an even stronger pulling of his hair and a merciless yanking back of his head. A cold shiver had snaked its way down his spine, starting at the nape of his neck, causing his body hair to stand upright in its path. His breath came only intermittently from his lips, betraying in low moans the pain he had felt at that moment.

Heahmund had remained determined. He didn't let go, only strengthened his grip and turned the tables by now insulting him, humiliating him for not being able to free himself. He had tried to lash out, but this had likewise only resulted in Heahmund's laughter ringing in his ear. He had been able to feel the warm breath as it danced over his skin, tickling him. It had been at that moment when he had realized that Heahmund was way too close. He could feel his body heat transferring to him. It had made him sweat - not out of fear, but he had suddenly become far too hot. He had been able to clearly perceive Heahmund's unmistakable scent. Rough masculinity coupled with the smell of the leather of his armor. It had wrapped itself around him like a warming cloak in winter, making his mind foggy.

Before he could have stopped it, another moan had escaped from his mouth. Again disguised as a cry of pain, but the truth was, the pain had long since faded into the background of his mind.

Heahmund had demanded an apology from him, which he wasn't willing to give. Not that easily at least. His stubbornness had only caused the bishop to intensify his efforts to get him to say the desired words after all. To make it even clearer that he meant business, Heahmund had let go of his hair and instead grabbed him firmly by the back of the neck and pressed his thumb against his throat. Breathing, therefore, became increasingly difficult, his heartbeat accelerated, heat covered his face. While it didn't bother him anymore, at that time he was mortified by how much his body had reacted to Heahmund.

Panic and a strange feeling that he couldn't identify at that moment had risen in him, made him lash out in a new attempt to get free and above all, get away from Heahmund. He felt super nervous, restless. He became more and more aware that he was at Heahmund's mercy. A thought that should have triggered another wave of fear, but instead, this certainty triggered another burst of tingling lightning that discharged itself in his crotch.

Only the arrival of a servant, who had entered the room without knowing what was going on inside, had freed him from his predicament. Witnesses are never any good. Heahmund knew this, and had therefore immediately distanced himself from him, but not without once again hitting the wall, right next to his face in anger because of the disturbance. The sheer force of this act had caused another shiver. Only this time it didn't travel down his back, but instead radiated from his belly all the way down to his crotch as well.

When he had turned around while carefully massaging his throat, he almost tripped again. His legs felt wobbly, and Heahmund's gaze, as steely and icy as his grips before, didn't make his condition any better. He hadn't managed to get a word out, was too speechless and confused inside. Ivar remembered that he had just stared at Heahmund. His eyes must have been full of disbelief at what had just happened between them. Out of reflex, he had slapped the bishop across his face, which was still contorted with rage, and just a blink later he had also felt a burning sensation on his cheek. The burning sent another tingle through his body. Like a wave that whipped up once again in his lower abdomen and settled into a twitching of his dick.

Heahmund had turned without another word and left, closely followed by the servant who hurried after him so as not to be alone with a confused and upset barbarian.

Only after he had made sure that no one else was in the room did he dare to grope his crotch. In disbelief, he stroked over the slight bulge, whose existence he would never have thought possible. Not after all the disastrous attempts in the past to get his dick to work. Whether alone or with a more or less willing slave.

The sensation of feeling the hardened outline of his own cock in his palm had left him in awe. Having become greedy and also with a portion of pride in him, he slipped his hand into his pants and his slightly trembling fingertips ran over his slight arousal in fascination. He was holding the same cock he had touched so many times before, but it was bigger and firmer. It had been fascinating.

He wasn't rock hard and couldn't show off a full mast as he had often seen with his brothers when he had secretly followed them on their nightly excursions. Still, tears of relief had welled up in his eyes, blurring his vision before he wiped them away with his other hand. Sigurd's insults had crossed his mind, and a new wave of pride surged through him at the realization that he was a real man after all. Nothing his brother had said was true.

But these feelings of happiness and relief were also accompanied by shame. It burned on his cheeks as Ivar realized what had brought him into this state. The shame, or perhaps the lack of further stimulation other than the feel of his hand, caused the magic to soon be over and he was once again holding only a limp cock in his hand.

It had taken Ivar a while to accept his special nature. But eventually, the feeling was too addictive for him to give it up. He wanted more, desperately wanted to experience the whole package, and so he had chosen Heahmund as his new favorite pastime. Not a day went by without them clashing. Every public discussion became a duel of their sharp tongues. Every, not always so accidental, encounter outside the public meetings became more and more quickly physical.

Just as quickly as Ivar had realized that he didn't want to give up this exciting feeling, he had also realized that Heahmund seemed to enjoy their way of arguing just as much. It would have been easy to avoid each other, especially for Heahmund, who knew his way around the court better, but when he wasn't actively looking for the bishop, Heahmund seemed to be looking for him. The final confirmation that it wasn't just his body that burst into flames when they collided became apparent to Ivar when he felt Heahmund's arousal clearly pressing against his own crotch after Heahmund had positioned himself threateningly close in front of him in an attempt to intimidate him.

For a moment he had actually been intimidated, just not for the reason Heahmund was trying to get across.

Without much thought, he had slipped his arm between their bodies and enclosed Heahmund's arousal with his palm. While heat had risen in Ivar's cheeks, all color had drained from the bishop's face. He had probably expected ridicule and scorn, but not the offer that Ivar would apologize for once if he was allowed to do it the way he wanted.

It was the second time during an argument that his face had been pressed against something. Only that day his nose was pressed into curly black hair, while his lips slid over hot and silky feeling skin. His cheeks were held by two strong hands that dictated a rhythm that suited Heahmund's taste and at the same time making sure that he didn't lose his cock to sharp teeth. Mutual trust, that one's own weakness was not exploited to the advantage of the other, hadn’t been established at that time.

Since that day they liked arguing even more than before.

Ivar was jolted out of his thoughts when he heard heavy footsteps in the hallway, hurriedly approaching his room. Shortly thereafter, his door opened swingingly and banged against the stone wall with a loud thud. Heahmund, who to Ivar's delight was still visibly about to explode, entered the room without having been invited in first.

With an equally loud crash, Heahmund let the door slam behind him and slid the narrow wooden latch into its socket to keep out further intruders. It was better to be careful. It was bad enough for Heahmund to know that God saw what he was doing behind that closed door. What sins he was indulging in. No one else needed to witness his weak spirit.

This gesture alone caused more tingling in Ivar's lower region than the previous touches of his own hand, which had unconsciously begun rubbing over his crotch while reveling in memories. He felt his cock twitching and the heat pooling in his crotch.

"You'll regret this." No sooner as Heahmund had turned to Ivar, he spat out these words as he strode determinedly toward the young Viking.

Ivar laughed out loud, remained seated and winked provocatively at Heahmund. "Do you really believe that? But wait, you also believe that there is only one God.... Of course, you would also believe something ridiculous like that I would have regrets. But no, I regret nothing. Quite the opposite." He didn't mind that Heahmund unabashedly directed his gaze to the hand with which he continued to rub himself.

"I should kill you on the spot for the humiliation you’ve caused me," Heahmund said angrily. He came to a halt in front of Ivar, looked down at him iron-faced, and reached for the hand whose movement he had just followed with his eyes. He gripped it firmly, denying Ivar any further pleasure.

This statement elicited another of Ivar's typical soft laughs. He kept eye contact with Heahmund and looked at him challengingly. "You were just begging for it with your arrogant attitude, weren't you? Besides, you wouldn't like me dead. You'd follow me in death shortly afterward out of sheer boredom." Ivar tilted his head slightly, lowered his gaze, and looked directly at Heahmund's crotch. There was no need for shyness between them. What he saw there made his lips open a crack and his tongue glide over them. Suddenly, he was hungry.

Heahmund's mouth twisted into a grin as he leaned over Ivar. He let go of Ivar’s hand and grabbed his chin instead, holding it firmly between his thumb and index finger. His fingers dug into the hollow in the cheeks, forcing Ivar to open his mouth a split again. He knew that Ivar needed this kind of physical touch to get aroused. Probably a faint bruise would remain where the tip of his thumb pressed firmly against Ivar's jawbone. Neither of them minded. Ivar rather welcomed keeping souvenirs of their meetings, which he could later enjoy in silence as he reminisced about how they were created.

"You're too full of yourself." Relentlessly, Heahmund forced Ivar's gaze upward, stopping any further uninhibited glances at the center of his body, whose uproar he himself felt too vividly. When their eyes met again, he loosened his grip a little but continued to keep his fingers on Ivar's chin. His thumb began to brush over the full lower lip.

"I am, but don't worry, there's plenty of room for you to fill me up, too." The finger on his lip hindered him somewhat when speaking, making his pronunciation slurred. At the end of his answer, Ivar licked over the tip of the thumb and let a kiss follow on it. Waiting, he looked at Heahmund, whose eyes had become a bit fierier.

"You are the epitome of the Whore of Babylon." Heahmund's response turned into a gasp as images flooded his mind of how he would make Ivar's words a reality. No prayer helped against the greed that was spreading through him. Heahmund had tried, had asked for guidance to be able to renounce this carnal desire, but the pure adrenaline that was flowing through him at the moment he couldn't compensate in any other way than how he was about to do it.

"Tell me her story later. She sounds like fun..."

Out of nowhere and without warning, Heahmund yanked him up by the collar, bringing them both to an upright position. Ivar clung to the bishop's upper arms, trying to distribute his weight evenly on both legs. Pain shot through his right ankle, causing him to slump briefly. Heahmund tightened his grip around him, holding him up. He waited briefly for Ivar to stabilize before he grabbed him by the upper arms to turn him around in a swift movement. In a promising thrust forward, he let Ivar feel his hard cock against his well-shaped ass. It made them both gasp, and Ivar tried to push himself against Heahmund as best his legs would allow, gyrating his hips.

"Without Alfred, you're at my mercy now," Heahmund murmured in a dark voice.

"Heahmund~," Ivar dragged out the name, making it sound as if the person addressed had said the stupidest thing ever. "The last thing I want from you is your mercy, dear bishop."

Again. Heahmund grabbed Ivar's face, forcing it sideways, letting the ocean meet ice.

"Tell me what you want instead." Heahmund knew the answer, but he wanted to hear it said out loud. It would give him satisfaction. Seeing Ivar's pained expression when he admitted what he was thirsting for was always appealing, an image he never grew tired of.

"I want land for my people to settle. The former king ... ughn..." He couldn't speak further, for the hand that had previously clasped his face now wrapped around his neck, pressing against his larynx and forcing him to cough in surprise. The grin that had been on his face as he spoke disappeared as Ivar pulled his lower lip into his mouth and stifled a moan.

"Tell me what you want," The bishop demanded anew, his voice a cold whisper. He made sure Ivar understood it was no time for jokes by imitating another thrust, letting him feel his urge, which had continued to rise over the last few minutes.

Ivar couldn't suppress another moan as he felt the hardness trying to press between his buttocks. Images were immediately in his mind. Heahmund naked, sweating, thrusting into him in a wild rhythm, bringing him to the brink of despair. Ivar needed it. Urgently. For his taste, it had been far too long since their last time, even though he had felt Heahmund inside him only two days ago. He had no patience to further tease the man who brought his cock to life with his penetrating gaze alone. Ivar slid his hand inside his pants and rubbed over his semi-hard erection, whose excited throbbing he clearly felt as he spoke his next words.

"Fuck me like you hate me." Ivar pressed out between thin lips while keeping eye contact. He felt the heat spread through his belly to his cock just from saying those words out loud. His face was also getting hot, caused by the humiliation of his wish. Ivar had to cling tighter to Heahmund's arm, which was wrapped around his chest, holding him tight so he wouldn't lose his footing. That his words also didn't leave Heahmund unaffected, was evident in his look. It seemed to darken, giving way to the desire that blazed in him and Ivar could hardly wait until the fire that he had carefully stoked before, finally ignited in full flame.

"I do hate you. No need to pretend."

"Show me how much you do so…and don't hold back."

﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

@youbloodymadgenius@istorkyou@ivarlover

#heavar #ivar x heahmund #heahmund x ivar #ivar the boneless #bishop heahmund #vikings fanfic #vikings fanfiction #vikings #ivar lothbrok #ivar ragnarsson #my stuff #my writing #smut fanfiction

21 notes · View notes