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#but like we're not man we're not i met him a few weeks ago
heavenknowsffs · 11 months
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Sorry for another vent post but here goes
#like i'm not looking for a relationship ok ? but i met this guy and we've been hooking yp#but like he is being all sweet and caring and he is great don't get me wrong#he's like eddie munson i'm not gonna lie#but at the same time he doesn't get my jokes and when i make a sarcastic comment or something funny he always thinks i'm being honest#and then he's too sweet if it makes sense in normal convos? BUT if i am ganuinely distressed (which i am a lot you guys know)#he is just not very emotionally intelligent 😬 and like it's all fun and wtv but i feel like he might like me more than i like him#and i called him babe once bc i had this girl friend who calls everyone babe and i spent like 3 days with her so i called him that#and now he always calls me babe and i'm like 😐 pls stop but i can't tell him to stop bc it will seem rude#and yeah my friends that know him are like he's such a cool guy and so sweet and everything and it looks like we're dating#but like we're not man we're not i met him a few weeks ago#anyway i think in reality i'm trying to find bad things about him just so i can justify not liking him and sabotage the whole thing bc +#+ i'm too afraid lmao#i think i'm emotionally unavailable and don't want a relationship or feel ready for it at all#i feel like i'm starting that age most ppl have at 18/19 of exploring and just vibing except i should have gone through that then#but i never got the change bc of abusive relationships and being at home and not having freedom to just exist#and now i do and i feel like if i start dating someone i'll lose my freedom again#which should not even happen in a healthy relationship but that's how i feel#maybe will talk about this to my therapist see what he says#i think i know what he will say like 'you're just afraid don't think about it too much tell him how you feel'#and i HAVE told him generally how i feel and that i don't want to move mad about it and he was like 'no were just getting to know eachother
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amentomensmut · 5 months
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I've never asked for a request before and i dont have clout to write it myself so i thought id ask since i like some of your Mike stuff but
What about something like reader and Mike are friends and he goes to a wedding her as a favor cause i like the idea that he has like a messy suit, loose tie kind of hot mess vibe and smutty things happen lol I dont have much in mind but the idea of him in a messy suit trying to look cleaned up is just like ...drool idk
Plus One
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Mike Schmidt x fem!reader wc: 3.1k+
Summary: You invite Mike to be your plus one at your sister's wedding, but things go wrong during the reception and Mike uses you to take out his frustrations.
Warnings: 18+ CONTENT, okay so like reader and Mike are friends but also its kinda angry sex??? You’ll see. Manhandling (sorta), slight exhibitionism, degrading, praise, dirty talk, finger sucking, fingering (f receiving), unprotected sex (wrap b4 u tap pookies)
Note: oh my GOD this one got away from me and i'm NOT sure about it, I feel like i could’ve written this a bit better but i just started babbling and now we're here. to the person who requested this: THANK YOU.  i loved ur idea and him in a suit like makes me drool too omg. i also couldn’t help adding a little angst in here. also so nevry to post this?? so lmk what u guys think! enjoy :)
“Please, Mike. I swear this is the last thing you’ll ever have to do for me!” You plead, trying to reason with the very unimpressed looking man in front of you. You’ve been stuck in Mike's kitchen for the past half hour trying to convince him to be your plus one to your sister's wedding next Saturday. Clearly, your convincing hasn’t been successful so far. 
“The last time I did a favour for you was supposed to be the last time.” Mike says with a knowing smirk, and you roll your eyes. A few weeks ago, you went out to a bar with some friends and you may have had a few too many long island iced teas. The owner had forced your hand into calling someone to pick you up, and it was Mike's number you had dialled that night. As he drove you back to your apartment with an unpleasant look on his face, you swore to him that that would be the last favour you'd ever ask of him. How you wish you could take that back right about now. 
“Okay, well, I was drunk when I said that. So it doesn't count.” You say with a frown, crossing your arms against your chest like a child who was denied candy. 
You can’t really blame Mike for not wanting to go. Your family is…a lot. You love your family, you really do (most of the time). But, they can be judgemental. You were the kid in school who always got the hottest new toys for Christmas, and had big themed parties for your birthday every year. It had never really dawned on you that you were more well off than other kids until you had met Mike. You became friends with Mike when you were both 15. When you first brought Mike over to your house to hang out, you heard your parents whispering about him that night when you were supposed to be in bed. Your parents gossiped about the kidnapping of his brother, the suicide of his mother, and how Mike and his sister were essentially left to their own devices with their father paralyzed and consumed by grief. It made you sick to hear your parents nitpick and discuss Mike's life like it was a reality tv show. Your parents never really approved of your friendship with Mike, and they tend to not-so-subtly make that known whenever you make the mistake of bringing him up in a conversation. 
“I don’t think that’s how that works. Besides, when your sister offered you a plus one, I really don’t think she had me in mind.” Mike says as he reaches into his fridge for a beer. “In fact, I think she’d prefer you to invite that guy who works at the convenience store and catcalls you everytime you go in, instead of me.” He says, cracking open his beer and offering you a smile before he takes a sip. 
“Well now you’re just being dramatic.” You huff as you walk over to the couch in Mike's living room and take a seat. Mike follows you from the kitchen and sits down in his armchair, kicking his feet up on the coffee table. Mike sticks his tongue out at you and you have to restrain yourself from strangling the man. If it were any other wedding you would’ve just gone on your own. However, your family events tend to…take a turn for the worst. Your family's gatherings usually end with drama, and you know that even though it’s your sister's wedding, this will be no different. That’s why you're insistent on bringing Mike as your plus one, so you can have a little support if things go awry. 
“Very mature.” You say with a shake of your head, once again rolling your eyes at the rude gesture.
“Listen, I’ll go. But, on one condition.” Mike says, and you sit up straight at his words.
“What’s the condition?” You ask suspiciously, but at this point you think you’d agree to almost anything.
“You babysit Abby for a month,”
“Deal.”
“And do my laundry for a month.” Mike adds.
“That’s two conditions actually, Mike.” You scoff as you get off the couch to leave.
“So you’re inviting the guy from the convenience store then?” Mike teases, knowing he's your only option.
You turn around to face Mike, squinting your eyes at him. God, you hate that cocky smirk he does when he knows he's winning. Bastard.
“Have a suit by Saturday. I’ll be over at 10am.” You sigh, flipping Mike off as you leave through his front door.
“Very mature.” You hear him mumble on your way out.
—-----------------------------------------
“Mike, it looks like you just came back from a bachelor party. Not like you’re going to a wedding.” You say, noting the way Mike’s tie hangs loosely around his neck and the first couple buttons on his white button up are left undone. Mike runs his hands through his hair and you quickly bat them away, scolding him for ruining the hair you had just attempted to fix in the car only moments before you arrived. You can’t deny that he looks handsome. He surely looks charming with the way his gelled hair falls messily on his forehead, and the way his dads old suit fits him almost perfectly.
“Well, hopefully your sister doesn’t mind.” Mike says sarcastically as he adjusts the cuff links on the ends of his sleeves and steps out of your car and towards the church where your sister is getting married. 
The first half of the wedding went pretty smoothly. You and your sister have never really been close, so It wasn’t a surprise to you when she didn’t ask you to be a bridesmaid. You and Mike sat a few rows down, occasionally playing footsies under the pew when you’d accidentally bump feet. A kiss was shared between the bride and groom, and everyone left to go to the reception. 
You were nervous about the reception, to be quite honest. Mike could tell, and he put his hand on your lower back, resting it there as you both walked into the banquet hall. You nearly faint when you see the sheer amount of people that fill the room. There have to be about 200 people minimum. It seemed like way less in the church, you think.
“I need a drink.” You mumble to Mike, dragging him over to the bar. 
Both you and Mike order a drink, and you want to be swallowed by the ground when you hear your mothers shrill, sing-songy voice behind you. 
“Darling! I didn’t see you during the ceremony, I thought you hadn’t come.” You turn around and she pulls you into a tight hug, pressing a kiss to both of your cheeks. She pulls away from you and you notice her eyes immediately land on Mike. “Oh, and what a surprise. Mike, how are you and your sister?” Your mother continues, and you bite the inside of your cheek. 
You watch as Mike plasters a big, albeit fake, smile on his face and shakes your mothers hand. 
“Abby and I are doing well, thank you for asking.” Mike says, and you almost laugh at his cordial tone. Mike sends you a ‘help me’ look and you mouth a ‘sorry’ to him.
“Gosh, it just devastated me to hear about your fathers passing.” Your mother says, clutching her chest like she's in pain, and you think she deserves an Oscar for the way she acts like she gives a shit. “I’m sure it must be so hard for you to provide for your sister alone.” Your mother adds and you watch the smile slowly slide off of Mike’s face.
“Why do you say that?” He asks, and you suddenly regret ever asking Mike to be your plus one. 
“Mom-,” You start to say, but she disregards your voice, raising her hand as you speak to stop you.
“Well, I know you struggle keeping a job. You know, not everyone is cut out to raise a child.” If you could see yourself, you’re sure all the colour would be drained from your face. You’re left speechless, mouth half hung open at your mothers words. How could she say that? She doesn’t know him like you do. She doesn’t know how much Mike sacrifices to provide for Abby.
You look over at Mike and his jaw is tightly clenched. You brace yourself for Mike's next words, but they don’t come. Instead, you watch as he excuses himself and walks towards the mens bathroom.
“Well, he woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.” Your mother jokes once Mike is out of earshot.
“Jesus Christ, mom.” You say incredulously as you turn to go find Mike. 
You walk towards the bathrooms, entering the men’s restroom with only one thing on your mind. Mike. Luckily the restroom is empty, save for Mike who is leaning over the counter. You slowly reach behind yourself, locking the bathroom door. You begin to step towards Mike, but you stop when you hear his voice.
“Do you think I'm not fit to raise Abby?” Mike asks you angrily, not even turning to look at you. You just stand there like an idiot, reaching down to fidget with the hem of your shirt.
“I-, no. Of course not.” You say, and the music that was loud in the hall, is now only a low hum in the bathroom. 
It’s silent for a moment, and you’re not really sure what to say, or how to make things better. You resume taking slow, tentative steps towards Mike and you stop once you’re behind him. You place an uncertain hand on his back, softly rubbing it up and down to comfort him. He lets you touch him and you hear him let out a breath. He turns around to face you and you look up to meet his eyes. He studies your face for a moment, and you inch even closer to him. 
“I’m sorry about my mom. That was inexcusable.” You sigh. If you were in Mike’s shoes, you probably would’ve left the reception entirely, and you’re not entirely opposed to that idea right now. 
“Your mother doesn’t think I’m good enough for you.” Mike finally says, and there’s distaste in his tone. You don’t say anything, you know it's true. Your family, especially your mother, has never approved of your friendship with Mike. 
“Do you think that?” Mike asks you, and you’re just now realising how close Mike’s face is to your own. You look up at him with furrowed brows and shake your head.
“No, Mike. I don’t think that.” You say quietly, and you swear the tension between Mike and you is so thick, it could be cut with a knife. You look down, but you feel Mike's hand grabbing your jaw and forcing you to look back up at him.
“You can’t even look at me when you say it. Pathetic.” Mike seethed. You let out a hushed whimper at his words..
“Sorry.” You say, but your voice sounds small. “I know you are.” He coos, rubbing his thumb back on fourth on your cheek.
“I need you to do something for me, okay?” Mike says, leaning down to speak in your ear. His voice is sweet and the switch in moods makes your head spin.
“Okay.” You nod and Mike pulls away from your ear to look you in the eyes.
“Be fucking quiet.” He says, and he presses his lips to yours. You softly gasp in shock, but quickly kiss him back as he turns you around to hoist you up onto the counter. He grabs both of your knees, opening them to make space for him to stand between your legs. He grips your thighs harshly, and you sigh when he sucks on your bottom lip. He puts one of his hands under your jaw, using it to hold your head in place as he kisses you. His lips are slightly chapped, but you don’t mind. He kisses you with fever, and you can’t deny that you haven’t thought about this. 
He kisses down to your jaw and neck, sucking the skin in a way where you know there will be bruises. Jerk. You run your hands through his hair, throwing your head back at the pleasurable feeling of his lips gliding over your skin. The hand that was on your thigh is now trailing up your leg and under your skirt. You clench your legs around his hand and he softly bites your neck, wordlessly scolding you for your actions. You reopen your legs and his hand comes up to make contact with your clothed clit. He rubs slow circles and you let out a soft whimper.
“You gonna let me fuck you?” He slurs in your ear, and his fingers move from your clit to the waistband on your panties, pulling it back and slapping it against your skin. You nod and he’s pulling you off of the counter and flipping you around. Mike bends you over and your chest meets the cold granite. You look in front of you and you can see Mike behind you in the mirror on the wall. He pushes your knee length skirt up and around your hips, and groans at the sight of you bent over for him.
“You okay?” He asks genuinely, running his hands along the sides of your body in a comforting manor.
“Yeah, keep going.” You breathe out and he hooks his fingers into the sides of your panties, pulling them down. You clench around nothing as the cold air hits your cunt. You moan softly as Mike spreads your pussy open with his thumbs, groaning at how wet you are. Without warning, he inserts his pointer and middle finger inside of you, thrusting them in and out. The lewd, squelching sounds of Mike fingering you fill the bathroom and you suck in a sharp breath as his fingers curl up into your sweet spot. 
“Apparently your pussy thinks I’m good enough.” Mike says and you look up into the mirror to see his jaw slack, watching the way his fingers move in and out of you. You can feel Mike's erection brushing against the back of your thigh as he rocks his hips with every thrust of his fingers. 
“Mike, fuck me.” You whine, and Mike takes his fingers out of you. He brings them to your lips, pushing them inside your mouth, and you can hear him undoing his belt with his other hand. 
“Thought I told you to be fucking quiet.” He murmurs and you watch in the mirror as he shoves his pants and boxers down just enough to pull his hard cock out. He removes his fingers from your lips, using your spit as lube to pump his cock a few times before lining it up with your pussy. He slowly inches himself inside of you, pushing you down onto the counter. Your mouth drops open in a silent scream and you hear Mike let out a whine at the feeling of being in you. 
He starts to pump himself in and out of you, and he pulls you up by your shirt into his chest to make you watch yourself in the mirror. He fucks into you like he can’t get enough of you. Like being inside of you isn’t close enough.
“What would your mother think? Hm? About her sweet little angel getting fucked in the bathroom?” Mike says in your ear, with a sickeningly sweet tone. It's like he just knows how to push your buttons. You let out a low moan at his words. 
“Fuck, I’ve wanted to do this for so long.” Mike adds and your legs shake when he uses the hand that was holding you up to rub your clit. You drop back down on the counter and Mike grabs your hip with his free hand, using it as leverage to bottom out in you with every single thrust. He throws his head back in ecstasy and you clench around him, signalling your impending orgasm. 
“You wanna cum?” Mike asks, and his voice is raspy and fucked out. You nod your head ‘yes’. 
“No, want you to say it.” Mike says, and you can tell he’s close by his sloppy, less rhythmic thrusts.
“Please, Mike. Please, can I cum?” You beg, your voice hoarse. The filthy sounds of skin against skin echo throughout the bathroom, and if someone has tried to enter the bathroom since you’ve been in here, you’ve been too fucked out to hear it. Thank god I locked the door, you think.
“Cum, baby, Fuck.” Mike chokes out. Your legs shake as you cum around his cock, your orgasm only heightened by the feeling of him filling you up. You bite down on your hand to muffle yourself and you swear to god you hear Mike whimper, pussy drunk as he continues to ride his high thrusting in and out of your sloppy pussy.
After catching his breath, you feel Mike pull out of you and you wince at the feeling of his cum dripping down your inner thighs. You slowly tilt your head up as you watch Mike get some toilet paper to clean himself up. He tucks himself back inside his boxers and pulls his pants up. You flinch a little as you feel him come up behind you, cleaning you up with more toilet paper. 
“Sorry, was I too rough?” He asks softly, looking at you through the mirror and you shake your head.
“No, just sensitive.” You say as Mike finishes cleaning you. You pull your panties back up, letting your skirt fall back over your legs. Your knees buckle a little bit as you try to stand straight and Mike rushes over to you, lending you a hand.
“You know, I actually think you’re one of the only people who genuinely thinks I am good enough.” Mike says, and you look up at him.
“Of course I do. I always have.” You say softly, gently touching Mike’s cheek.
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loveyouprongs · 1 month
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hope we grow old, but we never grow up
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james potter x fem!reader
upcoming content: fluff! mentions of reader being anxious in crowds, mentions of just having had sex but not smut, mentions of alcohol. lmk if you think i missed anything :)
authors note: i hope you like this! i’m still new to writing, so i tried my best! inspired by one of my favorite songs by one of my favorite artists: never grow up by niall horan!🎶 despite any photos used in the header, it’s important that people of all races can identify with my work so please let me know if any of the descriptive language i use is exclusionary, i’m trying my best!
word count: 2.8k
masterlist
“I hope we still dance like we're fallin' in love, Hope we still drink like we're back in the pub”
the noise inside the pub was so loud you could feel the floor shake beneath your feet, or maybe it was just your brain making it up. you were getting jostled and a man elbowed your shoulder, causing the cranberry juice in your cup to slosh over the edge. a sharp gasp escaped your lips that you were sure would get lost in the rowdy atmosphere but james quickly snapped his head to look back at you, eyes trailing down to the red liquid dripping down your hand.
“y’alright, sweetness?” big, brown eyes peering at you as the hustle and bustle of the crowd moved on around you both.
“i’m good,” you said back softly, squeezing his hand that had been tightly grasped in yours since the moment you both walked in. today was the final match of the rugby championship and everyone in town was together to watch in anticipation… and drink, no matter the outcome. james had sweetly invited you out with his friends a few nights ago and you of course said yes. the two of you had begun dating a few weeks ago, and you were eager to learn everything about him and spend as much time as possible with him, even if it meant trudging through sweaty, drunk bodies, resisting the urge to cover your ears.
“sirius got here early so he got a table for us already, we’re almost there,” james assured, squeezing your hand back. as you neared the large booth tucked away in the corner, the weight in your chest lifted at the sight of remus rolling his eyes at whatever sirius was saying, waving his hands expressively.
“they’re here! finally!” marlene squeaked and everyone’s eyes turned towards the two of you and they started making room for you both in the booth. you couldn’t stop the tingly feeling in your chest at how easily they accepted you in their tight-knit group.
“mate, where the fuck have you been?’ sirius exclaimed, slapping a hand on james back.
“if you couldn’t tell, he’s already had a bit to drink,” remus muttered in your ear as you leaned in for a half hug around him. when you first met, you were sure he didn’t like you despite james’ reassurances that he was just a quiet person naturally. you understood that, being quite shy yourself, but you still desperately wanted his friends to like you. so when you instinctually gave him a soft hug for the first time and he didn’t pull away, even initiating it the next time you saw him, you were sure you and remus were becoming good friends.
“oh, i’m sure,” you responded, eyes widening at the collection of empty pint glasses that littered the table.
“what’s the score?” james asked, cleaning his glasses against his sweater with one hand, squinting up at the screen, the other stayed wrapped around yours, even though you were both sitting comfortably.
“not good jamesie, why’d y’think i’ve been drinking so much already?” sirius said, taking another swig of his beer.
throughout the night james was intensely focused on the match, going between not even breathing as he stared at the screen to groaning or shouting with sirius whenever his team made a play. you were fine with the fact that he wasn’t paying much attention to you, knowing this game was so important to him, and you and marlene were catching up anyway.
“y’having a good time, honey bee?” james asked, looking down at you for the first time in a while, his large arm wrapping around your shoulders, warmth immediately overtaking you. you could tell he’s well past tipsy, eyes alight with bubbly frivolity.
“honey bee? that’s new”
“‘cus you’re so sweet,” his hand that wasn’t grabbing at your shoulder came up to stroke your cheek and you were sure he could feel it warming up under his touch. the subsequent smirk that crawled across his face affirmed your theory, all adoring if not a tad smug, but he was charming enough to get away with it.
“i am having a good time, yeah, i mean, i don’t really understand what’s going on but it’s cute seeing you so focused.”
james laughed and you felt his chest rumble against your cheek as he tugged you in closer, “mm, it’s probably good that you don’t anyway, we’re getting absolutely shitted on.”
“it’s only half time, it can still turn around!” sirius slurred emotionally with his head in his hands, a lot like the other patrons in the bar disappointed at the team's performance.
“keep telling yourself that, mate,” remus said, patting his back pitifully, still reading his book.
“you want another drink? i can go get you one,” james offered and you shook your head, preferring to stay relatively sober so james could have as much fun as he wanted. “you’ll let me know if you do though, right? anything you want, i’ll do it for you.”
for the umpteenth time tonight, and for the millionth time in your relationship so far, james made your heart stop as he looked down at you with his unwavering gaze. you knew he was only offering to navigate the crowded bar for you, knowing your aversion to crowds, but such a declaration paired with the tightness of his grip around your shoulders, how you could feel his heart beat against the soft of your arm if you focused enough. something about this moment, tucked away in a pub booth, felt like it was the beginning of forever.
“i know,” you breathed out softly and james lips quirked up in a small smile, as if instinctively, and with a single nod and press of his lips to your head before he turned back to the screen, you knew he felt the same way.
in a way that could only be described as a miracle, the team pulled through and as the reporters announced a home win, the crowd erupted in cheers. “praise be to god!” sirius cried, reaching for remus’ pint while remus tried to keep him away. he’d been cut off around thirty minutes ago when he attempted to throw marlene’s purse at the screen.
“sit down! you’re not even religious!” remus sighed, wrangling in his wild friend. you could only smile as remus tried to feign annoyance but couldn’t help but laugh when sirius started pressing congratulatory, sloppy kisses to his cheek.
“i can’t believe it!” james cried, wrapping his arms around your front, your back pressed to his chest as he towered over you. you were still sat in the booth but james had stood up five minutes before the match ended, pacing to get his nervous energy out.
you titled your head back to look up at him, genuine happiness radiating off his large form. “that was incredible!”
he looked down at you with a beaming grin, “it definitely was! did you see that last play? blimey, can’t believe we pulled it off!”
as he spoke you twisted on your butt to face him, and he caged you in between his spread thighs. “i know! i don’t know how they do it, i would get so tired- oh!”
you were no longer sitting, now fully upright with your feet dangling off the floor, arms tightly strewn around james’ neck as he lifted you in a hug. you could feel his hair tickle your cheek as he tucked his face into your neck. he spun you both around in staggering circles, having to stop when he felt the alcohol quickly begin to travel back up his stomach.
james couldn’t believe how perfect today was. his favorite team winning, surrounded by his friends, and at the center of it all was you. like a figurine from a snow globe come to life, so charming and sweet. so open to becoming friends with his friends, liking what he likes; he still doesn’t know how or why you agreed to a date with him, nonetheless put your trust in his rough hands, but he could only hope that soon he could carry your heart, and you his.
“this whole day is incredible,” he said, lips brushing against your ear as he set you down.
your guys’ bubble was popped when marlene shook your shoulders, not quite as gone as everyone else, but getting there as sangria glossed her lips “babes do you hear this?!” she let out loudly and you tuned back into reality, music now blasting through the speakers as the patrons danced and sung along happily.
“sorry to steal her from ya, but this is our song!” marlene slurred winking up at james who only shook his head and watched you get dragged to the middle of the makeshift dance floor and jump about with the other girls.
“to doing this all next year?” remus spoke, handing james a glass of water, with one for himself as well.
james chuckled and watched as sirius infiltrated your dance circle, horribly attempting to break dance, but you’d never guess based off of the encouraging woops! and wows! from you and the girls hyping him up.
james could do this again next year, and the year after that, he’d quite like it, he thinks.
“I think that we could be like that, every single Sunday in our Sunday best. Laughin' over nothin' with a full wine glass.”
“honey bee, i’m hopeless with this,” james grumbled, giving up on his tie and falling back against the bed. at your silence he rolled on his side to catch a glimpse of your face through the mirror. your lips twisted at the side, surely holding in a laugh you refused to grant him with, not wanting him to know he’s softening you up again.
“it might help if you button your shirt first,” you said, finally turning to face him. even with his face half squished against the mattress and hair sticking up in all directions he was still the most beautiful boy you’ve ever seen.
his eyes slowly grazed up your figure, body he was just ravaging now covered in soft, flowy blue fabric, and your hair was tied up neatly with a bow. James let out a low whistle, heat immediately rising to your cheeks, “well would y’look at you,” he mumbled as if he was speaking to himself, “s’ gorgeous.”
you took a minute to collect yourself, shaking your head at how he still made you this flustered this far into your relationship. “thank you, love. you could look beautiful too if you got dressed.” you now sat primly on the sheets beside him, stroking his cheek.
“too tired,” he said, voice low as he engulfed the hand of yours on his cheek in his and brought it to his lips, “you really wore me out, baby.”
“james!” you chastised, trying to pull your hand away fruitlessly. he smirked against it and pressed a final kiss to your palm.
“what? you did! absolutely mindblowing! that thing y’ did with your hips… oh baby!” he moaned and you slapped a hand against his chest, walking back over to the mirror.
“clearly i didn’t hold up my end of the bargain if you’re able to get dressed s’ fast, lemme make it up to you, honey.”
“no!” you squeaked, quickly gathering your make up and running to the bathroom, james’ laugh echoing behind you. any more talk like that and he actually would convince you to go back to bed with him for another round. but you promised you’d go to marlene’s birthday dinner and you were really looking forward to it. in the back of your mind, you knew it was a mistake to get tangled up in the sheets so close to when you had to leave, knowing james could be absolutely insatiable when he wanted to, but you couldn’t resist!
for the next few minutes, you both got ready in silence. you applying light mascara and blush, and james trying to manage his hair. “need a haircut soon,” he said breaking the silence as he reached over you in the bathroom.
“me too, i think. but i like your hair long.”
“i know you do,” james remarked back, a haughty smirk donning his features once again, falling into a pure smile as you playfully rolled your eyes. as he combed some product into his thick locks you took in his appearance, a plain white t-shirt that hugged his muscles and framed his arms in a way that made you question if he was really from this earth or a Greek god, and fitted slacks, you recognized as the one’s you bought him a few months earlier, after claiming he had no nice going out clothes aside from jeans and the one tuxedo he had for a friends wedding.
“you look really nice, james” you said and he cast his gaze down to you through the mirror.
“thank you, sweetness,” he said back and two sentences, as simple as that, caused the love in the room to blow up like a balloon. the sultry, teasing energy from before now a pure adoration that hung in the air.
“we’re a good looking couple, aren’t we,” james said as you both finished, now looking at the two of you in the mirror.
a startled laugh escaped you, “i suppose we are,”
“no wonder i always want us to be having sex, i mean who could blame me!” james exclaimed, walking to the door, keys jingling in his hand.
“please get it all out now before we get to marlene’s, this is supposed to be a classy party!”
“oh, alright! but i’ll remember this when you’re grabbing at me later,” he said, holding open the car door for you.
“we’ll see about that.”
the sun was beginning to set, casting marlene’s back garden in an orange glow. she set up tables and chairs, all holding delicious food and wine, and fairy lights were strung along the awning.
“marls this looks amazing! happy birthday!” you said, giving her a hug.
“thank you! i love your dress! potter… you cleaned up nicely,”
“it was hard to find a clean shirt, but this one passed the smell test, didn’t it, love?” he joked back, twin gags coming from you and marlene before the three of you erupted into laughter.
“i want you to come meet my best friend at work, she’s so nice!” marlene said and in a flash you both were gone, pastel skirts flowing in the wind.
“‘bout time you got here!” sirius called, hugging james, “was starting to thing you wouldn’t show,”
“sorry, got caught up at home…”
remus rolled his eyes, already knowing what was coming.
“…if you know what i mean,” james finished, wiggling his eyebrows, eating up sirius’ wolf whistles and high fives.
“you keep us oddly informed of your sex life, you know that mate?” remus asked, pushing off james’ hand that took purchase in his hair.
“what else are brothers for?”
“ugh!” remus groaned.
“are they bothering you, rem?” you asked, pulling up a chair at their table.
“aren’t they always?” james and sirius let out matching offended scoffs as you laughed.
“y’always take remus’ side, ‘s not fair!” james whined.
“i have to! it takes two of us to watch over the two of you!”
“exactly,” remus laughed, crossing his arms across his chest.
“well in that case, the two of you can stay here, while jamesie and i settle a bet,” sirius said, mischievously, lighting the adrenaline in your boyfriend’s eyes.
“do i want to know?” you asked james, who sent you a blinding smile.
“siri here thinks he’s faster than me. than me! can you believe him?” james said, stretching his calf. his thighs were hugged wonderfully in his trousers and you quickly darted a glance at marlene’s beautiful -yet muddy- garden.
“have to prove him wrong, don’t i?”
“yeah, you can’t be datin’ a loser, a slow one at that!” sirius retaliated and you knew there’s no way you could talk him out of it then.
“just make sure to be careful of your nice clothes, love,” you pleaded, “you look so handsome, the last thing you need is to be covered in grass stains.”
“promise, i’ll try my best honey bee,” james said back, cupping your cheeks so your lips squished together and pressing a kiss atop them.
“c’mon let’s get this race started! or are you scared, pretty boy?” sirius egged and james ran up besides him. as the boys took off you knew it was only a matter of time before it resulted in a friendly yet frantic wrestling match, as most of their competitions did. so you captured the image of your tall, broad-shouldered boyfriend, dressed like he just came out of a catalog, running under the setting sun in your head now to look back on fondly. his childish giggles carried throughout the air and you had a pathetic smile on your face despite yourself.
“you’ll just have to hose him off before you get in the car,” remus said, content with sitting with you, watching your loved one's mess about, truly happy.
“it’s my own fault for thinking he could keep a white shirt clean.”
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ellebakers · 1 year
Text
☆ Desire | Part one (+18)
Ethan landry x reader.
part II. | part III
Summary : just ethan fucking you against a wall.
Warnings : smut + language + blood. ! SPOILERS FOR SCREAM VI !
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it's been a year. a year since richie and amber destroyed your life. a year of waking up every night screaming after having a nightmare. it had to stop.
when your friends asked you to come and live with them in new york a few months ago, you refused. but the more the months passed and the more you felt alone.
that's why a few weeks ago, you called each of them to ask them to put you up until you found a small apartment not far from the university.
"i would like y/n. really, but with tara and quinn, all the rooms are taken." sam told you.
"it doesn't bother me but... you might hear us a lot anika and me, well you know, you might hear us doing certain things." mindy said
there was only one person left. chad.
"no problem gorgeous , I'll arrange the third bedroom for you and you can move in with us whenever you want. ethan is nice, a little shy but nice." your best friend told you.
you were so excited. can't wait to see your friends, but above all can't wait to start a new life far away from woodsboro and especially far away from ghostface.
———☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ♡ ☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ———
it was eight o'clock in the morning, your taxi had just dropped you off in front of chad and ethan's building and you couldn't help but smile. this city is so big that no one is likely to find you. especially not the man in the white mask who haunted your nights.
after taking the elevator to the fourth floor, you took the corridor on your right as your friend had told you and stopped in front of apartment 45.
you raised your arm to knock but before you could move the door slammed open.
" y/n !"
" chad !"
you jumped at the brunette and hugged him, so happy to see your best friend. the boy did not take long to reciprocate the gesture.
"you still smell so good." he exclaimed.
you laughed "you’re still so weird."
he pulled back and lightly pinched your nose "i missed you, little head."
you smiled at him "I missed you too, big head."
he pushed aside to let you into the apartment.
once inside, he took your coat and your bag "is that all you took?" he asked you.
"yeah, i just took some change and some stuff. my parents will send me the rest."
he nodded and put your things on a small bench in the hallway.
"come, let me introduce you to ethan."
you followed him to the kitchen where a boy with curly hair was sitting at the counter. "ethan" hearing his name, the boy looked up. you can't help but notice how cute he was. "this is my best friend y/n." the boy's gaze fell on you for a moment then he quickly looked away. "y/n, this is ethan."
you waved your hand "hi"
"hi" he muttered, then he got up, got his things and walked towards what you assumed was his room.
chad turned to you pursing his lips "he's shy."
you nodded slightly, still confused by what had just happened. as a first meeting you had known better. did you scare him ? maybe he didn't like you. but you had only just met him, it was stupid.
your best friend cleared his throat, bringing you back to reality. " i forgot to tell you, but we're going to sam’s place in twenty minutes."
you widened your eyes "wait what? but i've only just arrived. and i won't be ready in twenty minutes."
he shook his head, raising his shoulders "but yes ! I installed your room, you just have to change, plus the girls don't know you're in town."
you crossed your arms "oh, so for once in your life you managed to keep your mouth shut."
a mischievous smile appeared on chad's face "oh, girls i had dated prefer when my mouth is open, especially between their-"
you cover your ears "shut up, I'm going to change."
he laughed and tickled you as you walked past him. "chad stop"
"ok"
———☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ♡ ☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ———
after putting on jeans, a tank top and a leather jacket, you tore your hair down and put on some make-up, in ten minutes you were ready.
it was not the case of chad…
you growled when you saw that your friend wasn't ready and was running around looking for a t-shirt.
"seriously chad, put something else on your back it's okay."
"nah nah and nah, it's the t-shirt tara gave me. and besides, don't pretend that you don't like seeing me shirtless."
you rolled your eyes, then what he just said hit you.
"wait. you have a crush on tara!"
chad froze and turned to you "what? nah, it's just that...she gave it to me and...it would be rude not to put it on."'
"of course, I believe you." you smirked and chad gives you the middle finger.
ethan came towards you but moved very far away from you.
okay nice… you thought.
chad yelled which startled you. seeing your reaction he apologized "sorry kitten, I just found my top. come on, let's go, I have to stop and buy some beer, Tara only likes corona."
you smiled shaking your head.
———☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ♡ ☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ———
while chad was in the store, you were in the car with ethan, who still hadn't spoken to you.
a ding caught your attention. a new notification appeared on your phone. it was that damn dating app that mindy told you to install. a certain brian came to send you a picture. you opened it. and the photo of a dick appeared. you growled and blocked him. that was the downside with this kind of app, the guys you met on it only wanted one thing. sex. after turning off your phone, you leaned your head against the glass and sighed.
"you shouldn't be on this kind of app." for the first time that evening, ethan had just spoken to you.
you didn't know what to say, but it could be a good way to strike up a conversation with him. after all, you were going to live with him for a while so you might as well be on good terms.
"yes, I know. i thought i would meet good people, but i only come across perverts."
"you're really pretty. that's what they come for. maybe you should try talking to guys who are less handsome or popular, but who really care about you."
he finds you pretty. the cutest guy you've ever seen thinks you're pretty. you must have dreamed. and his voice. lord, you could kneel before him and do anything he asked just by hearing his voice.
"yeah well. every guy, popular or not, are interested in me until they see my scars and learn who i am. thanks to richie and amber."
you expected ethan to answer you but he kills himself. at the same time, chad got into the car and drove to sam's place.
———☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ♡ ☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ———
"chad! you're late. again." grumbled mindy.
the three girls were busy in the kitchen so they didn't see you come in behind chad.
"i have a body of god, it takes time to take care of it before going out."
"of course." his twin replied.
" i feel like a wave of mockery coming from you mindy. isn't it y/n?"
you approached and saw the three girls turn sharply, shock evident on their faces.
"holy shit." exclaimed sam
tara threw herself into your arms and mindy put down the bottle she was holding so as not to drop it, still in shock. they haven't seen you in months except for facetime.
"it's good to see you." murmured the little brunette who hugged you against her without wanting to let you go.
"it's good to see you too tara."
"okay okay, let go. it's my turn now." mindy exclaimed as she pulled tara away from you.
she cupped your face in her hands "fuck. is it good to be able to touch you." chad opened his mouth to comment but mindy cut him off rolling her eyes "not sexually dumbass."
you laughed and hugged your friend.
after a while she withdrew to make way for sam.
"i missed you." the eldest carpenter told you.
"i missed you too sam."
after a while, two other girls arrived introducing themselves as anika and quinn, after greeting them, you started to eat. it's been a year since you felt so good, surrounded by those you love and safe. your friends had all changed a lot over the past year, you were so proud of them. but something bothered you, like a bad feeling. you shook your head slightly to erase the feeling. after all, you were safe, nothing could happen.
you felt eyes on you. you turned and met ethan's eyes. you smiled at him but he turned his head towards quinn, they exchanged a strange look.
maybe they are a couple.
but they don't act like one. you looked away and focused on what mindy and anika were saying. after a few hours, your eyes began to close. chad was the first to notice.
"do you want us to go home?"
"i'll go home. but you, stay here. i'll walk."
"nah, we're going home too."
you knew he wanted to stay to spend time with tara. but you also knew that he wouldn't let you go home alone. "chad. stay here, i'll be fine, i promise."
as he was going to answer you, ethan cut him off. "i will accompany her."
chad was surprised but accepted. you got up, said goodbye to everyone and left with the brunette.
———☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ♡ ☆ ★ ❀ ✿ ———
the walk to the apartment was quiet and long. why did ethan want to come with you if it was to be cold with you. after a while, you found the courage to ask him the question you were dying to ask.
"did I do something to you ?"
you keep walking, and ethan didn't bother to turn to you when answering. "no, why ?"
"since I arrived you have spoken to me very little. and I have the impression that you don't like me too much."
"i don't know you, that's all. i'm always suspicious of people i don't know."
you didn't realize it, but for a few minutes, you had been following ethan down a dark, deserted alley.
"ok if you say so."
ethan froze, which made you stop. he turned his head in all directions.
"ethan what’s going on ?" you asked him.
he didn't answer you, you were going to ask him the question again, but he threw himself on you and pinned you against the wall behind you, kissing you.
it didn't take you long to respond by sliding your arms around his neck and kissing him. usually, you'll have pushed the boy away and probably slapped him. but ethan, you were really attracted to him. and we're not going to lie to each other, it's been a few months since you've had sex, so you weren't going to say no to a bang. after a while you pull away to catch your breath, he turned his lips to your neck, biting, licking and sucking on it in order to leave some marks. you moan when he finds your sensitive spot.
"ethan, someone might see us."
"i don't give a fuck."
you were ashamed to admit it, but hearing him talk like that made you wet.
"then fuck me."
he smiled against your neck "it was planned."
he pushed himself away from you, sliding his hands down your body until he was waiting for your jeans. he unbuttoned it and slid it off you, leaving your legs exposed in an alley. he knelt in front of you, knowing what he was going to do, you held your breath. he took the strip of your panties between his fingers and tore it. you were about to complain but ethan buried his head between your legs and took your pussy in his mouth. you moaned loudly and ran your hand through his hair.
"fuck, ethan."
you had a lot of guys who had went down on you. but ethan, fuck, it's like he's been doing this his whole life. between his tongue and his lips, you thought you were dying of pleasure. the more he penetrated you with his tongue, the louder you moaned. after a few minutes, the pleasure was too intense and you cum against his lips. he stood up as you caught your breath. he licked his lips "you taste so good."
"fuck me."
he smiled at you and lowered his pants to his knees, his boxers were the second to be lowered.
his dick was big and hard you didn't think it was going to fit but ethan grabbed your jaw between his fingers and made you look at him "it'll be fine." you nodded and he kissed you again. ethan took your left leg and put it against his hip. he spat into his hand and pumped himself a little before putting his cock towards your entrance. and in one movement he penetrated you, which made you moan and close your eyes. he didn't move, he took your other leg and lifted it, which allowed him to sink even more inside you. "fuck you’re so tight." he started his movements, slowly, pressing you more against the wall. you were still sensitive, which made you cry with pleasure at each thrust. "ethan, i'm close." he put his hand around your neck and squeezed lightly. his dominating side excited you even more and made you moan pornographic. the more he squeezed and the more you moaned, after a while you felt your second orgasm coming. "ethan, I'll-" you didn't have time to finish your sentence. an orgasm washed over you, making you moan and roll your eyes. ethan kept moving, and you knew he was going to cum, you nibbled on his earlobe "go ahead, cum inside me." that's all he needed to end up in you. he leaned his forehead against yours and caught his breath.
with one hand he pulled up his boxers and his pants. he lowered you to the ground, but his other hand still remained around your neck. "ethan you can take your hand off."
suddenly he looked up and smiled at you, and his hand squeezed more and more around your neck, making you gasp for air. "ethan" you were trying to beg him to stop but he kept going. he passed his other hand behind his back, you hadn't seen what he had taken, but you felt it. it was a knife.
a knife he stuck in your stomach, you tried to scream, but ethan stopped you. he raised the knife higher and higher. you felt yourself dying little by little. he dropped you to the ground and watched you bleed out. after your last breath. he took his phone and called chad.
"chad, oh my god that's horrible. we got attacked by ghostface. y/n, she's dead."
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archangeldyke-all · 12 days
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Something with like cellmate prisoner!sevika?! 😭😭😭 idk I just think like her being all dangerous and powerful, having a shit ton of friends but like selectively, no one messing with her maybe even hating how just mean she is. And then comes in reader and yk. I’d love if the story was smutty but u can chose ofc 🫦
i love this so much
men and minors dni
living in zaun is shit. but the one thing that's always kept you and a majority of your fellow citizens in line, was the ever-looming presence of stillwater prison just a few miles away. you've watched countless people enter those prison walls. you know very few who ever came back out.
and now, through a series of unfortunate events that lead to you assaulting an undercover enforcer, you're going to find out first hand just how horrible stillwater really is.
you don't think you've ever been so nervous in your life as the enforcer guides you-- restrained and already hating the itchy fabric of your new life-long uniform--down a long, long hall of cells.
he's chewing a wad of bubblegum, casually, like you aren't about to piss yourself with nerves. "listen kid." he says, looking you up and down. "i read your file. seems like you were just in the wrong place at the wrong time." he says, shrugging. "no prior arrests, clean record-- honestly i'm surprised they sent you here, but i guess you did break marcus' nose." the enforcer chuckles here.
"you know that asshole?" you ask. the man guiding you snorts.
"'s my boss." he mumbles. beside you, a prisoner lunges at the bars of their cell, screaming at you. you jump, and the guard laughs. "as i was sayin'-- you seem like a real peach. like you'd be a good influence on some of our... rougher prisoners." he mumbles.
dread starts to curl in your stomach. you have a pretty good idea of where this conversation is headed, and you don't like the outcome. you just hope you aren't cellmates with someone real bad: like genie the counter-fitter who got caught two years ago; esmee the weapons expert who successfully set an entire square block of piltover's wealthiest neighborhood ablaze; or, god forbid, sevika.
she'd been caught just weeks ago, smuggling an entire airship's worth of shimmer into piltover's loading docks. it was big fucking news.
sevika's a big fucking deal.
and you want absolutely nothing to do with her.
which is why, of course, the guard pulls you to a stop right outside of the only cell with a light on, the low, dim glow of a reading lamp and the quick flickering light of a lighter. you feel like you're gonna barf.
sitting in the shadows of the cell, puffing on a hand-rolled cigarette, sits sevika, silco's second in command.
if he's the eye of zaun, she's the arm. he might be watching-- but she's doing. she's nothing but bad news; everything you've tried your best to avoid while living in the undercity.
well, look how well that turned out for you.
"sevika, meet your new cellmate." the enforcer calls out. a pair of silver eyes snap up from her book and lock on yours. you shiver.
"fucks' wrong with her?" she mumbles. you gulp.
"nervous, i'd assume. 's her first-offense." the guard says. he shoves you into the cell and you jump as the bars slam shut behind you. "you ladies have fun." he says, before turning and walking away, the smacks of his gum echoing behind him.
sevika inspects you from her chair.
"how'd you fuck up so bad you ended up in a cell with me from your first offense?" she asks, seemingly intrigued.
"punched an undercover enforcer." you whisper. sevika's eyebrow hitches up, a little amused.
"yeah?"
"think his name was marcus, or something." you mumble. she sputters.
"ha! really!?" she asks, a little smile growing on her face. you nod. she takes a drag off her cigarette, then points at the bunk beds. "i get bottom. don't go thinkin' 'cause we're cellmates it means you get to touch my shit. i got people outside pullin' big favors for met to get shit like this." she gestures to her cigarettes and lamp. you nod. "don't look so nervous. i won't bite unless you piss me off."
you try to stop shivering. you don't succeed. "s-sorry."
she studies you for a moment, her smile growing as she does. though she's no longer armed with shimmer, her arm's still in perfect working condition, five little daggers gently tapping on the table top as her eyes dart across you. "you from the lanes?" she asks. you nod. she snorts. "you know who i am?" she asks. you nod again. she chuckles, then stands. she approaches you, circling around you like you're prey, then chuckling and leaning back against the table, crossing her arms over her chest. "you scared'a me?" she asks.
"shouldn't i be?" you choke out.
it seems to be the right answer. sevika laughs, then sits back down at her table, picking her book back up, chuckling intermittently for minutes after.
she's not a bad roommate. she's surprisingly tidy, always quiet, her nose usually buried in a book. she smokes like a fucking chimney, and you've come to find she gets her tobacco-- and sometimes a bit of weed-- from one of the guards every tuesday night.
she's got special privileges among most of the guards. they're always sneaking her books and flasks, letting her get away without cell-searches, letting her read past lights out and have lighters and screwdrivers and other dangerous, weapon-like tools.
you, on the other hand, do not have these privileges. and, keeping in line with sevika's one and only rule, you don't touch her shit. all of this means that while sevika smokes and works on her arm and reads and works out, you spend your time just... sitting on the top bunk. watching her.
sometimes, during open cell time, she gets visitors. you're surprised that none of these visits end in shady dealings-- sevika doesn't seem to need to trade her stash of goods for anything. most of her visits are quick, and most end the same way: a small scrap of paper being shoved in sevika's hand.
she burns the scraps after she reads whatever's on them.
she's... pleasant, sometimes. it's rare, but it happens. one day, you'd forgotten to make your bed before you went to breakfast. you returned to find it neatly made, and when you thanked her for helping you avoid trouble with the guards, she had just waved it off. "don' get used to it. i won't always be here to fix your mistakes."
once, a fight broke out while you were in the showers. you were sent back to your cell soaking wet-- your hair still lathered in shampoo. she had chuckled, called you a "wet rat", and helped you rinse your hair out in the tiny sink in your cell.
and... she's kinda pretty. it occurred to you one evening while the two of you were partaking in your nightly routine: sevika reading in her chair while you study her, pretending to sleep. she'd glanced up at you and whispered. "why're you always lookin' at me?"
you shrugged, then nearly choked on your tongue when 'you're pretty' almost slipped out of your mouth. "uh... i got nothing else to look at." you'd ended up saying. she seemed to accept this.
"you don't have any prison girlfriends?" you ask. sevika's in a particularly jovial mood today: the note she'd been delivered earlier in the afternoon must've had great news. she's decided to share her joint with you. the question slipped out the second you took your first puff-- your tolerance astronomically low from being without for so long.
sevika laughs. "nah."
"but..." you cut yourself off before you get yourself in trouble, biting your lip. sevika chuckles, then nudges your leg.
"y' can say it." she says. you smile at her, then speak.
"it's just... i had a few friends who work at babette's." you say. "i figured you'd have as much of a reputation here as you do there."
she takes a second, tilting her neck side to side as it cracks, then sighing. "i got shit to do in here." she says simply. you raise an eyebrow at her, biting your lip again, and she chuckles. "say it." she demands again.
"you just read all day." you laugh. sevika nods.
"i'm... working." she says. you just nod along, pretending you understand what she's alluding to.
it happens in the strangest way but you and sevika start to become... friends.
she sits alone at lunch, and you sit alone too, on the oppisite side of the cafeteria. but you're so used to looking at sevika, that you find yourself watching her even when there are much more entertaining things to look at, like the handful of fights that break out every meal.
you notice she loves the jello cups you guys get once a week. so you pocket yours and toss it at her later that night. the way she smiles lights up the room even brighter than her tiny lamp. you make it a habit.
she starts loaning you her books, finds you a crate to sit on by her table while you guys read together at night.
and when sevika gets jumped in the middle of the night-- you don't even question it before you jump out of your bunk, grab sevika's screwdriver where she left it on the table, and start swinging in the dark, blindly.
"what the fuck?" someone squawks when you manage to stab something in the dark.
"what?" sevika whispers in the dark.
"sevika, your bunkmate fucking stabbed me!" her attacker's voice rings out.
a light flicks on. you cringe at the sudden brightness, then blink in confusion as sevika and a guard with a screwdriver sticking out of their shoulder stare at you.
sevika's grinning. the guard is scowling. you hold your hands up in shaky fists, preparing for a fight. sevika chuckles.
"relax, sweetheart." she says, swinging her arm around you and tugging you into her side. "ran's a friend." she whispers into your ear. you blink at the bleeding guard, then back at sevika.
"so, what, we're taking your girlfriend with us now?" the guard-- ran-- asks. sevika looks at her friend, then looks at you, a calculating look in her eye. she smirks, shrugs, then looks back at the guard.
"she threw herself between me and a uniform-- can't just throw that kinda loyalty out, now can i?" she asks, smiling.
you don't know what's happening. you're about to ask-- when suddenly you black out.
the first thing that comes back to you is your sense of hearing.
voices.
"sevika, fuck, you can't just throw a wrench in the plan like this--"
"i can do whatever the fuck i want--"
"on the night of the breakout?! no heads up!?"
"do i need to remind you which one of us is second in command, here?!"
"...fuck. c'mon, help me load her in the van."
the next thing is your sense of touch. you're laying on the rumbling cold steel of a van floor-- currently in motion.
you're shivering, but then something warm and wool and smelling like cigars is draped over you.
you're head keeps bumping uncomfortably with every crack in the road. someone gently picks your head up and puts it in their warm nap, a hand coming down to scratch your scalp.
your voice comes next. "mmmh?"
"it's okay." sevika's voice comes. you groan, cracking your eyes open, only for her face to be grinning down at you. "fuckin' maniac." she giggles.
"wha?" you groan. you're seeing double, your head is pounding.
"ran knocked you out. 's what you get for stabbin' 'em." sevika chuckles. "but, you're lucky, 'cause they don't hold a grudge. they helped me lug your ass outta stillwater."
"wha?!" you ask again, snapping up. sevika laughs as you look out the front window of the van-- the depths of piltover surrounding you as you head, presumebly, to the last drop.
you recognize the man driving-- a tall, muscular, tattooed man who'd recently been added to your cell block's guard rotation. in the passengers' seat sits the guard you'd stabbed-- bandaged and watching you with amusement.
"wha's happenin'?" you mumble, looking back at your cellmate as you clutch a hand to your throbbing head. you've been shrouded in a red cloak-- sevika's already out of her prison uniform and back in her 'second in command' look. she smirks at you.
"y' really think i was jus' sittin' around, servin' my time?" she asks. you shrug.
"figured somethin' was goin' on. y' kept gettin' those notes. didn't wanna ask." you groan. sevika chuckles.
"well, you shoulda. or i shoulda warned you, so you didn't try killing my crew." she chuckles. you blink over to the person in the passengers' seat, cringing.
"s-sorry." you mumble. they wave it off.
"'s cool. knocked you right the fuck out, didn't i?" they chuckle. "we're even."
you turn back to sevika. "you broke me out of prison?" you ask. she shrugs.
"'re you mad about it?" she asks. you gawk at her.
"uh... just... a little surprised?"
sevika cackles. you smile at the sound, despite your headache. "i wasn't plannin' on it! then you started givin' me your jello, 'n readin' all my books, 'n..."
"she's got a crush on you." ran fills in from the front.
"i didn't say that!" she shouts.
"she's not denying it though--" the man driving teases.
you choke on your spit. sevika huffs, rolls her eyes, and speaks. "i... i kinda got a crush on you, yeah." she mumbles. "and i swear i'm not sayin' this jus' 'cause i think you're cute but: you should really stay with us at the last drop until things calm back down, since, y'know... you're kinda wanted now..." she says, rubbing the back of her neck.
you blink... shocked.
you don't really know what to think. you tried your whole life to stay out of trouble, and it managed to find you anyways in the form of a drunken under-cover enforcer deciding to smack your ass when you'd had too many drinks to hold your punches. you tried to stay out of trouble in stillwater until you were saddled with sevika. you tried to stay out of trouble with her until she dragged you-- literally, you were unconscious!-- out of prison along with her. it seems like trouble's meant for you.
but if there's one thing you're certain of, it's sevika.
you smile at her, then reach up to cup her cheek. she looks more nervous than you've seen her in all your months in stillwater together.
"you gotta crush on me?" you ask. she gulps.
"i'd say it's a little more than a crush seeing she broke you outta stillwater as your first date--"
"ran!" sevika hollers. you chuckle.
"is this our first date?" you ask, raising your eyebrow at her. she shrugs.
"it's... jus' don't expect the next dates to be this exciting." she chuckles, rolling her eyes. you grin, then dart forward and press a kiss to her lips. when you pull away, she's wearing that same nervous look again.
"you okay?" you whisper. she licks her lips, nuzzles a bit against your hand on her face, and nods.
"'m just kickin' myself for not puttin' the moves on you sooner. coulda been fuckin' you to pass the time in prison instead of readin' all those boring books." she mumbles. you burst into laughter, and she grins.
taglist!
@fyeahnix @sapphicsgirl @half-of-a-gay @thesevi0lentdelights @sexysapphicshopowner @shimtarofstupidity @love-sugarr @chuucanchuucan @222danielaa @badbye666 @femme-historian @lia-winther @gr0ssz0mbi3 @ellsss @sevikaspillowprincess @leomatsuzaki @emiliabby @sevikasbeloved @hellorai @vikasub
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mopopshop · 17 days
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Ur Best Friend
Inspired by the song “Ur Best Friend” - Kehlani and Kiana Ledé (such a good song oml 🙏🏾) 
Paige x fem!OC (cause ion do that y/n stuff, no hate but I don’t🧍🏾‍♀️)
Featuring: Jalen Suggs
Words: 2k
Themes: 
-drinking
-cheating (sorry fam)
-slight sexual content
As the sun began to set, casting a warm golden hue over the backyard, the atmosphere buzzed with anticipation. It was my boyfriend Jalen's twenty-third birthday, and I had spared no effort in planning the perfect party. A few weeks earlier, we’d just celebrated our five months, so I had to have a party to top the last. The decorations were up, the music playlist carefully curated (tons of Rod Wave and Bryson Tiller), and the scent of food filled the air.
Among the guests was Paige, Jalen's best friend since eighth grade. I've always been cordial with her, exchanging polite smiles and casual conversation whenever she was around. But something had shifted in the past few weeks. A subtle tension lingered between us, sparking whenever our eyes met, igniting something unfamiliar yet exhilarating.
She'd gotten more touchy with me as well, a hand on the lower back and a hushed "excuse me" to get past, a casual arm over the shoulder during group hangouts, a hug or two, but up until a few weeks ago, I'd seen these as nothing less than innocent.
She's a friend, you know? Jalen's friend at that, so no way in hell I'd ever try anything with her. Not to say she's not, you know... good-looking. She'd 100% be my type if it wasn't for Jalen. Paige's tall, she's blonde, she's funny, has a nice smile—did I mention tall? Sometimes she wears these glasses which make her look—
"Aniyah!!"
I'm pulled from my thoughts as my friend Gigi waves me over to her.
"Come on, we're about to sing happy birthday," she smiles and rushes over to me, grabbing my arm and dragging me into the kitchen.
As I followed Gigi into the kitchen, my heart skipped with something unfamiliar upon seeing her. Paige was already there, chatting with a few other guests and standing next to Jalen. She was wearing a grey Nike tech sweatsuit under the jacket, a white tee, her classic braided ponytail, and topped off the look with white Jordan 4’s.
As I moved through the crowd, I couldn't help but steal glances at her. At times, we made eye contact which deepened the flush in my cheeks.
I’d told Jalen earlier that week that I wanted to toast to him before we sang for the cake, and I’d prepared something ahead of time, but now as the moment approached, something about it just hadn’t felt right. In the midst of my thinking, I don’t notice Jalen coming up to me with open arms.
“Hey baby, you good?” He says with a look of worry.
I’m startled by the sound of his voice and am quickly ripped from my thoughts.
“Hey! Yeah yeah I’m fine… just hoping you like my toast,” I breathe out, praying he doesn’t press the issue.
He smiles and says nothing, placing his hand on the small of my back and directing me towards the front of the crowd… towards Paige.
I lock eyes with Paige again and I rush to look away, but as I go to look back, I notice she’s still staring.
What was this tension between us? And why was it becoming harder to ignore?
Gigi nudged me playfully, breaking me out of my thoughts. "Girl what is going on with you today, you gonna do this toast or what?”
With a deep breath, I grab my shot glass and get everyone’s attention.
“Hey y’all, before we sing happy birthday, I just wanted to make a toast to my man. Tonight, let's raise our glasses to celebrate Jalen's 23rd birthday. Jalen, you're more than just a boyfriend; you're my rock.”
Even as I say these words and the more I go on, I don’t feel as though they’re genuine. All I can do is think of Paige…
“Your kindness, strength, and passion inspire me every day. Your laughter lights up any room, and your presence warms my heart. Here's to another year of smiles, laughter, and adventures together. Happy birthday, Jalen! Cheers!”
I tip my head back and down the shot, feeling the lukewarm liquid burn its way through my throat. Bringing my head up, I catch Paige’s gaze once again, and this time I don’t look away.
Suddenly my view of her is obscured as a group of Jalen’s friends come from the hallway with his birthday cake. Everyone gathers around Jalen, me on his right side and Paige on his left while Jalen holds the cake in the middle. We quickly sing happy birthday, and he blows out his candles. He turns to me to go in for a kiss, but I catch sight of Paige behind him and end up swerving his kiss.
“Yo.. seriously you good babe?” Jalen spews sort of irritated.
“Fine! I’m fine,” I squeak out, “Just…”
My gaze falls over to Paige, seeing her fight back a smile or maybe a chuckle at the sight of me rejecting Jalen’s kiss.
“… distracted.”
“Uh.. cool, okay,” I see him look to his friend group.
“I’m just gonna go and talk with the boys for a minute,” and he presses a brief kiss to my cheek.
“Have fun!” I turn around and try to yell over the music, but I can tell he’s already forgotten about me.
When I look back, I see Paige again. She makes prolonged eye contact then trails her eyes to the porch outside. Cocking her head towards the door as if to say “let’s talk out here” and promptly turns around and heads out the back doors.
I wait a few minutes before heading out to follow her because as much as I long to talk with her, I’m not trying to look desperate. Slowly but surely, I make my way over to the doors, pushing them open to see Paige leaning with her forearms on the railing.
“What are you following me out here for?” Paige teases turning her head with a smirk. I laugh quietly, not knowing how to continue the conversation.
She stands up straight, turning around to face me, leaning her back on the railing, crossing her feet and arms.
“You're trying to be shy so bad, get your ass over here,” She laughs.
I throw my hands up defensively, my voice pitching up a little bit, “I’m not being shy! I just don’t know what to say right now.”
Paige reaches out and grabs my hand, pulling me entirely too close to her. “You don’t have to be so weird, it’s just me,” she says softly while caressing my fingers.
“I just- I.. I don’t know! Everything’s just so complicated right now,” I confess.
“Well talk to me about it,” she continues caressing my fingers, which makes it increasingly hard to think straight.
“I can’t.”
“Why not, mamas?”
That god damn nickname.
“I can’t because it’s about you.”
“What about me?”
“I can’t say! I just- it’s like- If I say how I really feel about.. you know everything, It’s gonna be real, and I’m not sure if I want it to be real.”
“Ma, you’re not making any sense right now.”
“I know!” I throw my hands up in frustration, I feel hot and flustered, and Paige being less than two feet from me isn’t making it any better.
Paige grabs my chin, bringing me closer and forcing eye contact.
“Hey, hey, look at me. Seriously breathe through it, you’re okay,” She says calming me down. “Just tell me what’s on your mind.”
I take a deep breath and back away from Paige slightly, letting the word vomit take its course.
“Every time I see you, my heart races, and my palms get all sweaty. I try to play it cool, you know. But let's be real, I am desperate. Desperate to talk to you, to be near you, to just be in your presence. And when I finally gather the courage to make my way over to you, my knees feel like jelly, and my words get all jumbled up. But you! You just stand there with that smirk on your face, teasing me, and you know you have this effect on me, you love it. I know you do.
And then you show up to Jalen’s party, making all the faces and giving me ‘fuck me’ eyes, and it’s just- it’s a lot to deal with! So I come out here to shut it down, but you make it so fucking hard by pulling me closer, rubbing my fingers and shit, making it impossible for me to think straight. And then by asking me what's on my mind, what's bothering me, you’ve become a better partner to me in ten minutes than Jalen ever has in these past five months.
And I know I should just spill my heart out to you, which I quite literally am doing right now, and tell you how I feel and hope for the best. But it's not that simple. I am scared, scared of losing you, of ruining our friendship, of making things awkward between us. But I can't help the way I feel, Paige. I just feel like the biggest asshole for doing this to Jalen because even though he’s not the best boyfriend, he’s still a good guy. I don’t know…”
I take a deep breath after that, looking at Paige’s face for any sign of disgust.
“Aniyah, I…” she starts.
“See, I knew I shouldn’t have said anything. I told you it was stupid! I knew you didn’t feel the same, and I opened my mouth anyways,” I quickly backtrack.
“Paige, I’m sorry, I’m just acting all crazy because Gigi’s birthday dinner's in a few days, and I have an early exam tomorrow, just super busy with things! Again, so sorry I-“
I’m quickly cut off by the feeling of Paige’s lips crashing onto mine and her arms wrapping around my waist.
“Don’t apologize for anything,” she breathes out in between kisses.
After a good minute or two of deep kisses, we break apart with our foreheads touching. I bring my arms around her neck while hers stay around my waist, rubbing the material of my black mini dress.
The air around us feels charged with electricity as we stand there, our breaths mingling in the warm night air. Paige's touch sends shivers down my spine, and I find myself lost in the moment, forgetting everything else except her and the connection between us.
"Aniyah," Paige whispers, her voice barely audible over the distant hum of music and chatter from the party.
"Yeah?" I respond softly, my heart still racing from the intensity of our kiss.
"I've wanted to do that for so long," she admits, her blue eyes searching mine for any sign of hesitation or regret.
“Same,” I smile, and we both laugh.
“This… this is not a good idea,” I sigh out.
“Probably,” she jokes. “But I really wanna kiss you again, so maybe let’s have this conversation in the morning,” Paige tilts her head back down to kiss me again.
I squeal, “Paige! Hold on, Jalen’s still here. So is literally everyone else.”
“C’monnn.. Jalen’s probably blacked out or cross-faded by now. Let’s just sneak past everybody…” She leans down, kissing up my neck.
“I… Paige..” I breathe out.
“Hm?”
“Seriously.. hold on two seconds. Just let me check on him.”
She rolls her eyes sassily, gripping my waist again, “Fine.”
I pull her hands off my waist, interlocking our fingers and dragging her with me back into the house full of drunken young adults. We continue to weave our way through the house finally getting to the room packed full of loud frat guys, including Jalen.
As Paige predicted, Jalen’s 6’3 self passed out on the couch surrounded by his friends in equal states.
“I fuckin’ told you dude,” Paige nudges me with her elbow.
“Shut up!” I laugh turning around and pushing her back slightly.
She grips my wrist, pulling me into her body. “Now can we…? You know..” she says smirking.
I burst out laughing, “Yes! Jesus, you—horndog.”
“The fuck is a horndog, bruh?” She replies chuckling.
“Girl I don’t know! And by the way, don’t call me ‘bruh’ when you’re trying to shove your fingers ins-“
Slapping a hand over my mouth, “Okay okay!”
We both laugh to ourselves as we stumble up the stairs with our mouths attached, bumping into walls and pictures along the way. Finally reaching my room and falling through the doorway.
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sungbeam · 9 months
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nonidol!kim sunwoo x f!reader
you never thought your humble, little podcast would ever touch somebody's soul like it did one kim sunwoo's.
▷ genre, warnings. s2f2l, mutual pining/crushing, college au, fluff, minor angst, humor, comfort, swearing, i actually know very little about anything going on w their majors tbh LOL 💀, uhh sunwoo's a simp but wbk, the outline of sunwoo's abs but if u read too fast u will miss it, kissing, low-key miscommunication trope (im sorry i hate those too), rip sorry yangyang, uhm they're kinda cute i *guess* :/, if there r typos then whoops i don't like editing !!
▷ word count. 28.7k help TT
this is the fifth installment of the love in unity series! this fic can be read as a standalone, but there will be references to the main plotline and all other yns will be referred to as _!yn. ALSO, the second episode specifically has a direct reference to a scene from flight risk, but the rest of the fic won't need any other outside context!
a/n: for @justalildumpling and her chopsticks <3 i dragged myself out of writer's block, pls reblog :'))
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EPISODE ONE (PILOT): RHAPSODY… LIKE THE BOHEMIAN ONE?
THERE was something about general education requirement courses that felt too much like a university scam. Why was it required to learn more about things that wouldn’t help one’s chosen career path in the long run? Sunwoo hadn't necessarily been thrilled when he wasn't able to get one of the lower level English classes to fill his requirement, but the 300-level literature class had so far turned out to be… actually interesting. Well, the literature itself was interesting enough. The professor?... Not so much.
There was one thing about this class that he could safely say kept him sane though. And it was more so a person than a thing.
The discussion classroom wasn't terribly full as he strolled through the door with his hoodie thrown over his dark brown curls and headphones, a pretty voice flowing through the ear pieces as he took his usual seat to the side of the room.
"...and we're back! Hope you all enjoyed this week's song recommendation. It's been a favorite of mine ever since my dad introduced it to me when I was a kid. An absolute road trip banger—"
Sunwoo's eyes flickered up to see that the TA for the discussion wasn't yet here, but he lowered the volume on his headset slightly in case.
"—kudos to all the songwriters out there. Writing relevant stuff that transcends time is hard, man. I can't even make meaningful conversation with my graduate student supervisor."
A small smile curled the corners of his lips upward. Just as he anticipated the segment on the host geeking out about her favorite oldies music picks, he heard instead—
"I can't even make meaningful conversation with my other grad student supervisors, you know?"
Wait a minute. Confusion flickered across Sunwoo's face as he checked and lifted one of his headphone ears. That can't be right…
Somebody sat down in the seat beside him, almost startling him because he had his back to the door. It was you, the pretty second-year who he had met on the first day of this discussion a few weeks ago. But he was peering at you now in a whole new light as a smile lingered on your face from your conversation with the class’s TA.
When you felt his eyes on you, you flashed him a bright grin. “Hey, Sunwoo.”
He cleared his throat, fumbling to turn his headphones off and follow your lead in taking out the materials needed for today’s discussion. “Oh, hey, Yn.” It occurred to him just how creepy he was probably being just then…just watching you. But the thoughts in his brain were flying around like mosquitoes around his head—had he been hearing things?
“What’d you think of the reading?” You asked him pleasantly.
The reading from the past week had been the first third of a novel called The Stranger, a version translated from its original written in French. Sunwoo sucked in a breath, grimacing, “It’s not my favorite,” he drawled. “I have no idea what the point of his character is, to be honest.”
You pursed your lips and nodded your head. “Yeah, he’s a little… flat,” you chuckled.
“Is this supposed to tie into the theory that professor was talking about last week?” He asked then, in an effort to actively shift his brain’s focus away from your awfully familiar voice and sayings, and to the present.
“Something about how he doesn’t fit societal standards. I think it’s existentialism and nihilism. Well, at least I think it is.”
Huh. Interesting. Sunwoo gave a little bob of his head, and this was just when the TA turned everyone’s attention to a class discussion about the novel. He definitely hadn’t thought of those terms specifically when reading, but at the same time, he did understand where you were getting that sentiment from. He just couldn’t articulate his view of literature quite as well as you could. That had made you somewhat intimidating to him in the beginning, besides your very cute smile, but he was hoping he could learn something from you nonetheless.
You weren’t even a literature major, he realized as he listened to you offer your thoughts to the group. It was cool, though—you were cool.
— ✶
The Songbird Station was a podcast, radio-esque show that Sunwoo had discovered over summer break, a few weeks ago. The podcast was hosted by an anonymous host who dubbed herself “DJ Dove.” She definitely didn’t mind talking about a few of her personal life experiences; it was easy to simply bar the names and identities. Sunwoo had binged all two seasons so far of the podcast, happily tuning in as a silent listener and admirer of hers for awhile, and he had always wondered where she went to school or who she was, but it hadn’t invaded his thoughts like this before.
Sunwoo laid in his bed the day after the literature discussion, his hands resting on his stomach and his expression turned up toward the violet-red LED-lit ceiling of his room. His phone sat on the edge of his nightstand as it played a playlist of songs that Dove had recommended to her listeners—or well, he wondered if he could safely assume that what he heard yesterday was correct, and that you were DJ Dove.
It would make sense, he thought. You were a sound and music production major, had great taste in music (from the brief conversations you struck up with him while in class), and you literally said the exact same thing that Dove had said over the podcast. It couldn’t have just been a coincidence. And now that he thought about it, your voice really did sound a lot like DJ Dove’s. There was a sort of friendly warmth to both of your voices, and—and—
Knock, knock— “Aye, Sunwoo! I'm going to Juyeon's place now. Are you sure you don't wanna come with?"
Oh, right. He had nearly forgotten that Eric had planned to head over to their new mutual friend's apartment tonight to watch a sports game. Juyeon was a friend of a friend of a friend—the connections ran long in their friend circle, he supposed. Sunwoo stole a peak at his phone screen for the time and his joints ached at the sight of 8:53 on the face. His face screwed up as he replied to his friend and roommate, “Nah, I think I'm still just gonna chill here tonight.”
He grabbed his phone fully off the nightstand this time and turned onto his side.
“Oh, okay. Don't burn the apartment down and don't steal my ramen!”
Sunwoo squished his face down into his pillow, raising his voice slightly since his words would probably be muffled, "I'm not going to steal your ramen!" This guy.
He heard Eric grumble something under his breath from the other side of the door, followed by the sound of footsteps moving farther away from his room. When he heard the front door close, he let out a breath and turned back to his phone. To his surprise, he had managed to absentmindedly navigate away from the playlist screen and to the Songbird Station homepage, filled with a collection of all of your links. One of these links was for listeners to submit song recommendations or ask questions, and most of the time, they were all anonymous with their own little nicknames.
He had never fully considered doing it… but that didn’t mean he hadn’t ever partially thought about it. He definitely imagined becoming one of Dove’s more frequent anonymous submitters and becoming friends with her—on a level that one could consider oneself friends between two anonymous users, at least.
But up until now, he hadn’t thought that he could do it. Well, because Dove was Dove; he was one of hundreds of listeners.
“But she’s Yn,” he thought aloud to himself, turning back onto his back to speak to the ceiling, as if the layer of plaster above his head could possibly give him a viable answer. “There’s probably a reason she doesn’t use her actual name,” he pondered further, expression contorted into deep contemplation. “This feels wrong!” He groaned.
There was at least one person he could count on to deal with his bullshit.
sunwoo’s phone: yes or no
tree rat: no
“Well, screw you, too,” Sunwoo huffed as he swiped out of his and Changmin’s text chain. Out of all the times Changmin said “no” randomly, it had to be this time.
It didn’t matter much anyway though. Sunwoo went back to the links page and clicked on the anonymous submissions. He was met with a customized greeting page from the hostess herself, as she thanked her listeners and asked what they’d like to contribute to the show.
Sunwoo moved to sit up against his headboard as he racked his brain for something to say. He had tons to say, but the first message had to be perfect, right?
“It’s fine,” he said out loud, thumbs flying over the keyboard to type out the first thing that came to mind. After all, it was completely anonymous, so it wasn’t like she would—or you would—even know it was him.
He probably read over his little paragraph about a hundred times before attempting to figure out an anonymous name to sign off with. He hugged his knee to his chest when he couldn’t come up with something cool, charming, or unique. Maybe he would stay completely unknown for now. Maybe he wouldn’t even have the courage to submit another message after this one anyway!—
"Rhapsody," he said aloud. Rhapsody was a cool word. Rhapsody anon? Was that who he would sign as?
He did the most logical course of action: look up the word. He asked the internet for its most basic definition, then somehow ended up in the rabbit hole of etymology of the word rhapsody. It described one who stitched verses or songs together—something of the sort. It sounded cool, at least.
It would have to do… and even if you—or DJ Dove—thought it was stupid, no one would know it was him.
Before he could psych himself out of it, Sunwoo pushed the submit button and launched his phone away from him onto the bed like it was explosive. There was something thrilling about anonymous submissions, but incredibly anxiety-inducing, as well. He could only hope that you would be pleased to read it.
— ✶
It was Wednesday when the next episode of the podcast dropped, and Sunwoo was swift to don his headphones on his way out the door of the apartment. The walk to campus was a good fifteen or so minutes, which would get him about a quarter of the way through the episode, but usually the line in the campus cafe was long, so he had plenty of time to listen.
“Welcome to Songbird Station! I’m your host, DJ Dove, and today, I went to my Groupon singing lesson and realized that I think my teacher is having an affair with her neighbor…?”
Sunwoo let out a snortish laugh, covering his mouth with his hoodie sleeve in slight embarrassment as he passed by somebody else going in the opposite direction. Usually, there would be anonymous submissions sprinkled throughout the episode, most of them having to be diverted to later episodes because they were song recommendations. Sunwoo wasn’t super optimistic about his chances of being featured in this episode, but a guy could dream, couldn’t he?
The sky was a pleasant shade of crystalline blue, even as the seasons shifted from summer to fall. There was a slight breeze wafting through the air that brought in the telltale autumnal chill.
"...and luckily the rest was history. My voice was completely dead and my throat is still a little sore, haha, so we'll do a couple more anonymous submissions and recommendations today! This is supposedly a radio show-esque podcast, after all. This one's from a new friend—Rhapsody Anon!"
Sunwoo nearly tripped over the flat sidewalk and sent a nervous smile to the other person waiting at the stoplight with him. Did you just say what he thought you said?
There came a soft laugh from you. "Ooh, like Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen? Such a classic, by the way. Rhapsody says: Hi Dove! Hoping you're doing alright and that songwriting is going well. I'm a relatively new listener but a fan from first listen—awh, wait… that's kind of like love at first sight but for the voice version, isn't it?"
He reddened. The crosswalk turned green.
"Anyways, that's really sweet; thanks so much—there's a bit more of the message that I'll post on my story later so we can save time, but Rhapsody, thank you for tuning in and interacting with me. Your message sounded so heartfelt to me? I dunno," you chuckled and he swore he could hear the smile in your voice, "maybe I'm a little biased 'cause I love your song rec, too. Speaking of which, Rhapsody recommends Painkiller by Ruel! An immaculate choice, if I do say so myself…"
Sunwoo couldn't help but smile to himself at your warm reception of his anonymous submission. He wished he could have gotten your full reaction to his entire message, but he understood that you needed to account for all the other things you had planned.
Even so, an acknowledgement from you would have been enough. He hadn't thought it was possible, but he thought he just became even more attached to this DJ Dove persona.
EPISODE TWO: I HATE VALENTINE'S DAY.
three months later.
THE curtains in Sunwoo's room were yanked open, the sound of metal rings against the metal bar scratched at his eardrums and made him grimace. It definitely did not help the pounding in his cranium, and—wait, was he in jeans? There was a disgusting after taste in his mouth, something akin to alcohol, and when he lifted his hand to rub his eyes, he felt dried tear tracks on his skin.
Eric stood at the foot of his bed with a scowl and his arms crossed over his chest. "I'm mad at you."
Sunwoo smooshed his face into his pillow in a sorry attempt to hide his eyes from the blinding overcast sky outside. "What's new?" He babbled incoherently.
It seemed his friend and roommate was not pleased with his answer and moved to tower over Sunwoo right beside him. "You couldn't have waited ten minutes before barging in? I was so close to kissing her!"
"Huh? What the hell are you…" Sunwoo's voice trailed off as the events of last night were slowly coming back to him.
Yesterday was Valentine's Day. Ugh. He remembered making plans to go to some singles party with Changmin and Chanhee, and that Eric was bringing EC!Yn over to woo her or something… yeah, he got all that. So why did Sunwoo drink so much and why couldn't he…
The notification… the tweet…
Oh no.
The emotions from last night came rushing back to him like the tide to shore. Horror contorted his face as his brain raced to string pieces of last night together. He released a groan as he brought both hands up to his face. "Oh my god," he muttered into his palms.
The distinct feeling of devastation and disappointment sank into his gut. No wonder he had thrown all caution to the wind last night and gotten himself drunk off his face.
"How bad?" He asked.
Eric still had his arms crossed. "You cried on EC!Yn like a whale and asked why women were perfect and why you couldn't have this one girl." By the drone of Eric's voice, he hadn't been pleased or amused by last night's events. Whoops.
"I'm—"
"You are going to be forever alone, by the way."
Sunwoo dropped his hands from his face and leveled a scowl up at Eric. Now, that he remembered saying, too. Unfortunately. "Hey! I'm still tender from last night."
Eric's smile was sarcastic and he said nothing as he made his exit from Sunwoo's room and left the hungover man to fend for himself. Left to his own devices, Sunwoo pushed out a harsh exhale as he stared up at the ceiling.
He remembered receiving the notification from the Songbird Station Twitter account and excusing himself to go to the bathroom to hear your voice memo. And when he'd finally found an empty bathroom and played it back, he learned a devastating piece of information.
Guys, I went on a date… updates in the next episode. That was what you had said, essentially—you, Yn Ln, the girl Sunwoo had met in his literature course last quarter and whom he had figured out was the anonymous host of the podcast Songbird Station under the pseudonym DJ Dove.
And he had gotten drunk over the fact that you'd gone out on a date, and said date hadn't been him.
"Dude," he said out loud to himself.
He couldn't believe he had gotten so off his rocker by this news. It wasn't like he knew you or liked you or—well, maybe he had grown an affection for you over the span of time he listened to your podcast and interacted with you via his own pseudonym, Rhapsody Anonymous.
But he was just another fan to you, and you would never know his identity.
A guy could dream though, right?
A thought suddenly occurred to him as he rolled over to go through the copious amounts of notifications on his phone he had. There were lots of messages in his group chat with Chanhee and Changmin that he would deal with later, lots of social media notifications, emails, and…
Wednesday. Today was Wednesday.
Sunwoo cursed. You were definitely uploading the episode today then.
He bit his lip as he sorted through the notifications to find one about the podcast. Sure enough, there it was: I Went On A Date? was the title, and he pretended like that didn't make him want to play Lany's Valentine's Day on loop—
The bedroom door opened and Eric poked his head into the room. "I made hangover soup."
Sunwoo blinked in surprise. "Oh. Thanks, man."
"Yeah, don't mention it," Eric mumbled, shifting on his feet. "Seriously, don't mention it."
— ✶
For the next couple of days, Sunwoo left the notification at the top of his phone, pretending like it wasn’t there. It had worked for about five minutes, but the remainder of time he was stubborn, he allowed his imagination to get the better of him. Although he no longer needed to take a literature course, he found himself deeply considering the vague title you had provided. Well, what could you mean by that question mark at the end? Had it not gone well? There was no way it could have, since your tone didn’t really scream “OH MY GOD I WENT ON A DATE!!!” (not that Sunwoo had imagined what he would have acted like post-date with someone like you or anything…). He didn’t even know who you had gone on a date with, and that made his stomach churn.
The curiosity devoured him alive over the two days he managed to torture himself with his overthinking. No one knew he listened to the Songbird Station podcast, and he planned to keep it that way. It would be the absolute death of him if any of his friends found out.
By Saturday morning, Sunwoo had had enough of his own stubbornness and caved. He donned his headphones, grabbed his bag, and headed out the door to do some work in a cafe located on the Ave. There was one that his friend Jacob had recommended to the group awhile back, and Sunwoo hadn’t looked back since.
As he tuned into the episode, he shoved his hands into the pockets of his hoodie, shivering against the cold, winter winds. February weather was a doozy, and a hot cup of coffee or hot chocolate sounded so very sexy right this moment.
“Welcome to Songbird Station! I’m your host, DJ Dove, and you’re probably wondering what the title of this episode even means, or why I sent that weird, cryptic voice message the other night.”
The traffic light turned green, and Sunwoo began to cross the road, the coffee shop in sight. His hands were beginning to get clammy in his pockets.
“Don’t riot, but friends, it means exactly what it says—” As you exhaled out a breathy kind of laugh, Sunwoo inhaled sharply.
“Helpful,” he muttered under his breath as he pushed into the warmth of the coffee shop. He shook the cold out of his body before hopping into the line to order.
“ —I did actually land myself a date yesterday. Honestly, I’m not really much of a dater; I never really had time with it over the past years because I would, uh… well, I would rather stay in and do music, y’know?”
The corners of Sunwoo’s lips curled up into a smile. Maybe he had been nervous before about this episode’s topic of choice, but he should have had more faith in you. Rather than speak about the date the entire episode, you always managed to worm in a discussion about your passions, and that was the kind of talk that had first gotten Sunwoo hooked. There was something so attractive about hearing or witnessing a person gush about their passions and ambitions—the way their eyes lit up, their posture righted itself, how they smiled so big that one could hear it in their tone of voice.
He was happy that you went out on a date, because you deserved to meet someone who treated you as special as you were. You were a good person, and it wasn’t fair that he was being so salty about it, especially when he was too chicken to—
“Sunwoo?”
His soul practically fell out of his body. “Shit—” He swore, yanking his headphones down with eyes as wide as the earphones. He whirled around to greet you with a flushed face, red like the old Christmas decorations still hanging up from the crown moldings.
You were standing right behind him with a mildly amused look on your face, your lips pressed into a smile and eyes crinkled in absolute delight. You were similarly bundled up like he was to no doubt shield you from the cold on your way here. “Sorry I scared you! I probably should have, like, tapped your shoulder or something, huh?”
Sunwoo let out a nervous laugh and cupped the back of his neck, the skin there warm to the touch. “Oh, uh, no problem at all. I just kinda…”
“Get scared easy?” You offered.
He huffed with a sheepish sort of smile. “No, no that’s not it. I—I just wasn’t expecting you, that’s all.” Inwardly, he winced. The fact that he was listening to your voice in his ears, and you just happened to say his name at the same time and appear in the same exact coffee shop as him. Weren’t there fifteen of these places on the block? There was no way you just happened to choose this one at this moment.
You chuckled, playing along. “Ah, I see, I see. We haven’t seen each other since fall quarter though. How have you been?”
You and Sunwoo inched up with the line, so the two of you now stood side by side. Sunwoo was trying everything he could to calm the racing of his heart. Play it cool, dude. “I’ve been okay…ish,” he grimaced, re-thinking his answer. “You know winter quarter is always the worst.”
“For sure,” you replied. “It’s so cold and dreary—nobody wants to leave their apartments, especially me,” you joked.
Sunwoo was about to chime in on how he could totally relate to that, when you popped the question: “And then there’s Valentine’s Day. Crazy how it never seems to rain on Valentine’s Day, though, so people can go out. Did you do anything for it?”
Sirens commenced their screeching in his head. WEE-WOO-WEE-WOO! Don’t let her know how much of a loser you were! He coughed, reaching up to scratch his head. “Uh, nothing special in particular, if that’s what you mean. A couple of my friends and I just went to this singles party.” Would that give you the wrong idea? Probably not, right? Why was he so bad at this, he thought, wasn’t he supposed to be a communications major?
You inched up in line. “Oh, that’s cool. I think I went to one in freshman year at my old uni,” you said.
Before he could stop himself, he said, “I almost forgot you transferred this year.” He knew that one from the podcast when you talked about the struggles of being a transfer student and having to almost “redo” your entire first year experience, social-wise. But you had also told him that when you and he had worked together in your shared class last quarter; it was just that the two of you didn’t really talk much about your old university much after that.
“It’s okay,” you smiled, nudging his arm with yours as a gesture for him to order first. “Not many people remember.”
Sunwoo wanted to protest, maybe to reassure you that it wasn’t that easy to forget something like that, but he was forced to switch gears and order his hot beverage first before he could say anything else to you. After he said goodbye to five more dollars, he stepped aside and made his way over to the pick-up counter to wait for you and his drink.
When you were done, you sidled up beside him, hands tucked into the folds of your coat.
Come on, say something, his inner voice chided. “So, uh, how was your Valentine’s Day?”
He immediately regretted it. Out of everything he could have asked, he had to go with the one topic he really didn’t want to hear about. However, it had been one of the logical progressions of the conversation, and who knew? Perhaps it wouldn’t lead to him feeling like he’d been shot down with lightning? (Was he being a little dramatic? Yes. Did it matter? Not when no one was going to hear him, no.)
You let out a small laugh and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “It was okay,” you replied.
It was… it was okay? What was he supposed to do with that answer—
“I mean,” you continued with a smile that looked more like a grimace, “it was—fine! It was fine. Uhm…”
Sunwoo’s thoughts came to a slow, teetering stop. Worry began seeping into the cracks of his brain as new scenarios formed. “Hey, if you’re uncomfortable talking about it, then we don’t have to talk about it.” All of the nerves and envy from before was becoming something softer in concern for your response.
“No! No, it’s okay. I promise,” you reassured him. The look you gave him was earnest, and he felt the fist tucked into his pocket gradually relax a bit. “It’s just weird putting it into words, y’know? I kind of chickened out of talking to my friends about it, and even to—” You stopped yourself short, and he could see you backpedaling in your brain. “Anyways, it just felt weird? I think it would have been a really nice night if I actually saw him in that light. But at the same time, I kind of want to try and give it a chance. Does that make sense?”
He nodded, tension falling out of his shoulders. “It does. I mean, sometimes there’s just no spark, y’know?” He added. “I was just worried he did something to make you uncomfortable or something.”
“Oh, no, nothing like that. You don’t have to worry.”
“Okay, that’s good,” he murmured, licking his lips. “I’m just curious—” he piped up, “—and you don’t have to tell me, but who did you go out with?”
One of the baristas from behind the counter called your names, and the two of you both stepped forward. Sunwoo took a long stride to get there before you, and handed you your cup for you.
You murmured a “thanks” to him first before stirring in a packet of sugar. “Liu Yangyang. Do you know him?”
Did he? Yangyang was one of the people Sunwoo recognized from not only around campus, but as a person who made music online, too. Even if Yangyang was in the same year as him, Sunwoo always admired the man’s flow and way with words. It made so much sense that Yangyang would pursue you, someone equally talented and charismatic, especially if the two of you were the same major.
A tightening sensation creeped into Sunwoo’s chest as he marinated on the revelation further. If you couldn’t see someone like Yangyang in a romantic light, then where did that put himself?
As Sunwoo let his intrusive thoughts get the best of him, you finished preparing your coffee.
“I’ve gotta run now,” you told him with a soft-cornered grin. “It was nice seeing you, Sunwoo.”
Sunwoo managed a smile back at you, head bobbing in some semblance of a nod, before you were exiting the shop. He stood there for a moment to gather his wits, his thoughts, and his dignity.
“Did that really just happen?” He muttered to himself. He took his coffee with him to find an empty table and retrieved his study materials from his bag. Technically, he didn’t even have to listen to the rest of the podcast, but… who was he kidding?
EPISODE THREE: HEART TO HEART
“YOU’RE coming with me to the practice rooms, right?” Ji Changmin trailed behind Sunwoo as the two of them shouldered into Sunwoo and Eric's shared apartment with their bags and leftovers from today's lunch. It had been about a week and a half since he had bumped into you at that café and he had been feeling over the interaction since.
Sunwoo popped open the refrigerator while his friend perched on one of the breakfast bar stools, his duffle bag dumped at his feet. "Uh, yeah. 'Course, hyung," he said, shifting some groceries from JC!Yn around to make space for his white plastic container.
A thought occurred to him, and he groaned. "But you're gonna have to go first—without me," he clarified. He grabbed the carton of orange juice out to pour himself a glass, facing his friend's curious look.
Changmin's brows furrowed. "Wait, why not?"
It was a reasonable question, as it went against Sunwoo's normal pattern of behavior. Usually, Sunwoo would tag along with Changmin to the practice rooms at the back of the performing arts building. Changmin was a dance major, and with the highly anticipated winter dance showcase just around the corner, it was important that he got that practice in. Plus, with Eric out of town for an away game, Sunwoo was left alone in the apartment, which wasn't exactly his favorite thing. He would much rather go out and be around other people… unless there was something else occupying him.
Today, that certain occupation came in the form of your first live podcast session, something you were trying out. It was just going to be a live audio stream, so you could stay anonymous with your pseudonym, and answer people's submissions live. You had been advertising it for the past week, having excluded the weekly podcast in order to prepare for today.
Sunwoo was excited as you were and wanted to support you and be one of the people tuning in live. This was important to him, and he had even gone so far as to plan out his day.
"I just have something I need to turn in before the day ends," he said easily, shoulders lifting in a half-hearted shrug. He lifted the glass of orange juice to his mouth for a languid gulp.
Changmin made a teasing noise of disappointment. "Aye, you know if Chanhee were here he'd be on your ass, right?" He chuckled, the dimple of his smile pressing into his cheek.
Sunwoo pouted when he lowered the glass. "If Chanhee or JC!Yn were here, I wouldn't have admitted to procrastination. I have self-preservation skills."
"And you don't think I'd be on your ass?" Changmin gasped dramatically with a hand pressed to his chest.
With tongue in cheek, Sunwoo grinned amusedly. He shook his head, adjusting the hood pulled over him. "Hyung, you can't ding me for procrastination when you procrastinate religiously. Remember that one time you had to beg Professor Ka—"
"Yah! Nobody asked for specifics!"
Sunwoo's chuckle turned into nervous laughter as Changmin reached across the island with a claw-shaped hand. "Ah! No! You stay away—go practice!"
Changmin snickered. "Chicken."
Soon after, Changmin indeed took his leave to head over to the performing arts hall. Sunwoo drained the juice in his cup and refilled it before making a beeline for his bedroom.
The livestream was projected to last for an hour, about the length of a usual episode, but you did say the timing wasn't set in stone. Sunwoo set himself up at his desk, signing into the platform you always used. Over the past couple of months he was Rhapsody, he'd become one of your regulars, suggesting new and old songs from his music library, talking about his day or week or something the last podcast had reminded him of. He liked to think that the two of you were friends—parasocially.
A guy could dream, right?
He was on his phone when the waiting room faded and became a split screen: one half with a sketched sign that read "ON AIR: COMING TO YOU LIVE!" with a little dove in headphones, and the other half was a live chat feed that people who were tuned in could use. There was both a public and private feature, and Sunwoo kept his on the public chat, unafraid of what a bunch of other people behind anonymous names and screens could do to scare him.
"Oh! Woah, I think that worked," came your voice, loud and clear, through his laptop speakers.
He smiled to himself, reaching over to settle his fingers on his keyboard. A tingling feeling bubbled up inside him, starting from his toes and rocketing up through his chest. He could actually talk to you in real time today.
You clapped lightly on the other side, relief pouring through your voice. "Thank god. I'm supposed to be good with some computer programs, but this livestream feature is kind of new. How're we doing, everyone? It seems…" A couple clicks from your end, "... We've got some more people rolling in. I'll give it a couple minutes, but let me know who we've got here today! It's so cool seeing you guys live!"
Sunwoo was swift to type out a greeting message: Dovey hi!! He paired it with a little, hand-waving emoji.
The small gasp of delight from you had him giggling to himself. "Oh my god, Rhapsody! Hi, best friend, welcome in! We might actually be able to hold a conversation for once," you chuckled.
rhapsody anonymous: yeah fs haha
rhapsody anonymous: did u have a good week? it felt weird without an ep from u 🤧
"Oh! Yeah, haha, sorry about that—”
He rushed to type as you continued with answering his question: No no! Don’t worry, I don’t blame you or anything lol it’s just something I look forward to every week.
“...Ah,” you said after skimming over his message. “Understood—and aw, I’m glad it’s something you look forward to every week. That makes me really happy to hear… oh! It looks like the numbers are becoming a little stagnant, so I’m gonna get started. Hi, everyone! Welcome to the live edition of Songbird Station. I’m your host…”
— ✶
An hour later, Sunwoo ended up seated at the kitchen counter, drinking orange juice straight out of the nearly-depleted carton, while the livestream continued on. The whole experience had been one of a kind, and by the way you were able to seamlessly speak and engage with your audience for the entire time made Sunwoo feel warm and fuzzy. He was glad this was working out for you.
There was a gradual lull in conversation, however, and you were just wrapping up your last topic to bring your first livestream to an organic stop.
“...wanna thank you all for being here, of course. 57 people listening to my voice for over an hour is kind of crazy, but this was a lot of fun!...”
Sunwoo was just about to start typing up a message to you when his phone buzzed on the counter beside his laptop. He startled, fumbling with the device and grumbling under his breath until he saw who it was and picked up the call.
“Hyung?” He squeezed the phone between his ear and shoulder, attempting to finish his private message to you. I was wondering if I could…|
Changmin’s voice came out breathy and panting like he had just finished a run-through. “Hey, are you done with your assignment yet?”
I was wondering if I could hang back for…| “Huh?” Why couldn’t he multitask, for god’s sake? I was wondering if I could hang back for a minute? If it’s weird though, then it’s no problem…|
No, that wasn’t weird, right? Totally not. He pressed the 'enter' key, satisfied with the message.
“What were you saying?” Sunwoo asked and picked up the phone with his hand. His eyes flickered back to his laptop screen to find that you had sent him a private message back.
Changmin let out a grumbling sigh. “I was just thinking—”
“Uh oh,” Sunwoo joked.
He could hear his friend’s eye roll from here. “When you get here Kim Sunwoo…”
“Okay, okay, okay!” He chuckled as he read your message and silently punched the air in celebration. “What do you want? I was in the middle of something.”
“Rude! And I was calling you because I was thinking about you,” Changmin huffed. “Anyway, I was just going over some of the movement for Juyeon and my ‘Light a Flame’ duet, right? And I came up with this combo that would be perfect for three people—”
Sunwoo sucked in a breath. “Oh, nonono!”
“But!”
“No!” Sunwoo protested. “Hyung, you know that I don’t… y’know, I can’t dance up there with you and Juyeon hyung! That’s way too much pressure; you’re both so good at dance.” He pressed his finger against the edge of the counter and began mindlessly dragging it along the surface. There had originally been plans of Sunwoo joining Changmin and Juyeon’s dance partnership for this year’s winter showcase performance, but Sunwoo backed out. The winter showcase was far too large of an event for Sunwoo could even fathom participating in, let alone dancing with two of the best dancers he knew. There was just no way.
Changmin sighed from the other end. He’d heard this argument before and he’d argued against this argument plenty of times. “Okay, fine. See you in how long?”
Sunwoo placed his phone onto the counter again so he could tell you that he was still here and hadn’t just left you hanging. “Uh, give me like, thirty minutes.”
“Alright. I better see your ass here in thirty minutes, Sunwoo.”
“Yeah, I know. See ya, hyung.” He hung up then, shoulders sagging slightly from the conversation. It wasn’t like he had to participate in the winter showcase—he was no dance major, nor was he a dance minor. He technically hadn’t even decided on a minor, and had only been focusing on getting this degree finished. Whether or not he had chosen a minor yet was not his parents’ favorite discussion when they visited him, but… it would get done when he had the energy to. He didn’t want to bring up the idea of a dance minor—he saw what it did to Changmin and his parents’ relationship and—well, it was just better this way, for now.
Having finished with his phone call, Sunwoo returned his focus to you, where, god bless, you were still waiting for him in the livestream room.
rhapsody anonymous: omg i’m SO sorry!! >< a friend of mine just called and turns out i am awful at multitasking
“No worries,” you laughed. “I figured that was the case. Everything okay, Rhaps?”
The corners of his mouth curled up at the thoughtful ask. Even when the two of you had been classmates, you were new to the school, but still made him feel like the two of you had known each other for longer than simply a few weeks. It only made sense that you were the host of this podcast, the very thing that had been his source of comfort as of late.
rhapsody anon: yeah nothing really serious lol
rhapsody anon: i just have this friend who’s doing the winter showcase and i was supposed to go to the practice room with him
rhapsody anon: actually, i was going to dance and perform w him too but ig i kind of chickened out
He didn’t know why he was telling you all of this; this wasn’t even what he originally intended to talk to you about.
He heard you make a soft sound of understanding. You shifted in your seat. “I see… the winter showcase is a big event though, as I’ve heard from peers and friends. It's probably really intimidating to even perform in the pre-show, you know? Are you a dance student, by chance?”
rhapsody anon: i’m not, but i’ve taken the intro to hiphop course my freshman year and i usually dance for fun w my friend
rhapsody anon: i think i’ve just always been kind of insecure in my abilities to keep up w him?
“Is he a dance major?”
rhapsody anon: he is
Sunwoo leaned back from the laptop and took his hands off the keyboard. He settled his chin onto his folded arms as he listened to your reply.
“Well, I don’t think you should compare yourself to a dance major, right, Rhaps? I mean, it’s not fair to expect more from yourself when he’s clearly had more experience. And if you enjoy dancing, then I don’t see what the harm in trying to perform or even just being satisfied with private practice sessions is!” You paused for a second to gather your thoughts. “What I’m saying is… is that, I can understand where you might feel insecure, and that’s normal, y’know? And if you’re feeling a little unprepared for this year, there’s always future opportunities.”
Sunwoo peered up at his screen as if he could see you on the other side, speaking to him. He sat up to type out a response. Thanks for hearing me out, it’s nice to feel validated. Sorry this kind of took a downer tone haha it wasn’t my intention, I swear!
You giggled and he swore he was smiling a little too wide now. “No worries, really! I’m glad I could be of help, even if it’s to make sure that you know your feelings are valid. If I’m being honest, one of the few reasons why I even started this podcast thing was to kind of just put my experiences out there in search of validity.” You sighed, “I dunno. It’s a story for another time. I am curious, though, as to why you originally wanted to hang out with me after the others left.”
Oh, right. Sunwoo bit his lip.
rhapsody anonymous: this isn’t really a song rec, but ig it kind of is… i feel like superstar by taylor swift reminds me of u
He held his breath after he pressed the ‘enter’ key.
“Oh…” your voice was soft in surprise, and it made something like giddiness spike in his chest. “That’s really sweet, Rhaps. I… I’m not sure what to say, but thank you. Genuinely.”
rhapsody anonymous: u don’t have to say anything!! really haha ur work and ur words have touched a lot of people
“Even you?”
rhapsody anonymous: esp me
And even after you and he had said goodbye to one another and logged off; even after he was well out of the apartment and on his way to campus, that giddy feeling in his chest still hadn’t left him.
EPISODE FOUR: SHOT THROUGH THE HEART! [AND WE’RE ALL IN PAIN]
DEAD week was not typically something Sunwoo had to worry about, as fortunate as that sounded. There were, obviously, classes that made his stomach queasy and made him feel like the world was crumbling into Hot Cheeto dust, but his classes this quarter had been merciful to say the least. The week before finals week was always something that could be visibly observed on campus: students either manifesting like zombies or zooming around to claim seats in the library; grades rising and falling like the housing market; and snacks and coffee being more commonly consumed than any other moment of the quarter.
It was always a hot pile of shit, no matter the student or major.
“Someone just needs to tell Ouyang to chill!”
“Uh-huh.”
“For sure.”
“—it’s not like we’re the root of all of his problems! I’m just trying to graduate!” Eric halted in the middle of the hallway, causing Sunwoo, whose face was nose-deep in his phone screen, to ram into the baseball player’s back.
“Ow!” He hissed, furiously rubbing the place at his forehead that had collided with the nape of Eric’s neck.
“You’re not paying attention,” said Eric, flatly. He turned to Jacob, who also wasn’t paying attention. “Hyung!”
Jacob’s head lifted from where he was busy smiling down at some orange cat video. “What? Nacho’s learning the periodic table—” He flipped his phone around to show Eric, his face immediately lighting up as he forgot about why he was even mad in the first place.
The three of them were currently in the front half of the performing arts building, heading inwards from the main hall to the backstage area where a couple of their friends were already hanging out. Sunwoo had bumped into Jacob and Eric on his way from one of the campus libraries, and with nothing else better to do (than to study), he tagged along to go find someone to bother. (Jacob and Eric were both STEM majors though, which was weird to Sunwoo since… well, shouldn’t they be bunkered up somewhere trying to survive this quarter’s dead week? Anyways…)
Sunwoo sighed and brushed past his two friends to venture deeper into the building. He could already hear somebody’s music blasting from the sound booth as they rehearsed onstage. Over the past several weeks, everyone had been busy preparing for the winter showcase happening at the end of finals week, right before spring break. Ever since Sunwoo’s talk with you over livestream, he had felt a little better about not joining Changmin and Juyeon on stage this year. Plus, from what he could tell when he watched them practice, they already looked pretty much perfect with just the two of them.
Though, there would always be a part of him that wished he really had the courage to go up there and show the audience what he was made of.
Sunwoo wandered into the main auditorium with his hands tucked into his pockets and the doors closing softly behind him. There was indeed a group practicing their number on the stage at the moment. He could even make out the shapes moving from behind the curtains in the wings as other tech members and dancers rushed to and fro to get to where they needed to. Somewhere in that mass of chaos were his friends.
A familiar voice had him lifting his head toward the sound booth. His eyes widened when he recognized you standing in the booth with Bang Chan, one of the more prominent sound and lighting directors working here at the performing arts center. However, it looked like you were leaving, your hands clumsily wrestling with the zipper on your bag while you continued your conversation with Chan, and while attempting to walk backwards out of the sound booth.
Oh my god, you were going to trip on something if he didn’t help—
Both Sunwoo and Chan pounced toward you as the thought occurred to both of them at the same time.
“Yn, careful!” Sunwoo yelled, as he dove for your phone.
Chan steadied you at the bicep, and you hugged your bag to your chest with a flustered grin. “Oops?”
Chan ruffled your hair as he let you go, nodding his hello to Sunwoo, then ducking back into the booth. You stepped out into the main room and shut the door behind you. “Thanks,” you said to him sheepishly, accepting your phone from him.
The two of you naturally fell into step with one another and Sunwoo let you lead him back out towards the main entrance again. “I didn’t know you worked behind the scenes here,” he told you, cupping the back of his head. If he racked his brain, he couldn’t recall hearing about it from your podcast either. “This is the second time I’ve seen you here,” he chuckled.
You stopped for a minute in the middle of the hallway to get a hold of your things. You had to hike your knee up to properly zip your backpack before hauling it over your shoulder. “Oh, that’s right! Just a couple days ago you were here with your friends, right?”
He gave a bashful sort of grin. He had been here a couple days ago when he came to bother Changmin, and ended up hanging out backstage while Hyunjae’s best friend hosted auditions for her play. It was then that he had seen you hustling about with the Lee Jihoon about lights. He’d been caught so off-guard by seeing you; it was a miracle he managed to even get Changmin to forget about that whole interaction. “Yeah, sorry I was kind of… weird. I didn’t expect you, that's all.”
“Lots of surprise run-ins with us, huh,” you teased, the side of your arm bumping with his as you walked.
Us.
“It’s nice to see you more often though.”
You nodded. “The feeling’s mutual, Sunwoo. Thanks for warning me earlier; I’m usually more careful with my stuff, especially when I’ve got special cargo.” As you said this, you reached back to pat your backpack affectionately.
Sunwoo lifted a brow, opening the door for you as the two of you stepped out into the lobby. “Oh? What kind of special cargo?”
The smile on your face widened. “It’s, uhm, a recording mic, actually! I’ve been coming by to intern around the tech side of things here, and Chan and Jihoon give me some tips about music production, too.” You trailed off, an idea taking hold in your head, and that wide beam from just seconds ago became this shy, little thing. “Hey… would you maybe be up to listening to something of mine? I mean, it’s kind of a weird request, but your music taste from first quarter was top notch—”
“Yes,” Sunwoo said, without even waiting for you to finish your rambling.
You paused, and he rejoiced in the pure delight on your face. “Really? That’s—this is great. Wait, I’m so excited! We’ll need to find a private place to listen, but—”
“Oh my gosh, Yn?”
Coming in from the front lobby doors was none other than Han Jisung, a fellow second-year whom Sunwoo was familiar with. He was bundled in a massive, puffy cream jacket with his head shoved into a beanie, and his nose was reddened from the cold. Jisung tucked the earbuds in his ears away into their case, waddling over to you both with the joy of a baby penguin. “And Sunwoo! Woah, it’s so cool to see you, man. What’s up?”
Sunwoo clasped his hand in his. “S’cool to see you, too, dude. Yn and I were just on our way out.”
Jisung moved over to you and pulled you in for an affectionate side hug. “Oh, well, that’s nice to hear,” he snickered, wagging his eyebrows at you while you sent him a pointed look.
Wonder what that was all about…
“Anyways,” continued Jisung, “I just came by to bother Channie-hyung. Is he in the box?”
You bobbed your head in affirmation. “Yup. There isn’t anyone else with him right now, so I’m sure there’ll be plenty of space for you to bug him.”
“Nice,” he grinned. As he walked away in the direction from which you and Sunwoo came, he sent a wave. “See you both around!”
“Bye!” Both you and Sunwoo called back before resuming your walk out the front entrance.
“So how do you—” The two of you laughed when you both started talking at the same time, saying the same thing. Sunwoo gestured toward you, insisting that you ask the question first. You did: “So how do you know Jisung?”
Sunwoo snorted at the memory. “I, uh, saw him in the hall once and smacked his ass, then asked for his number.”
You had to stop to double over in laughter, clutching your stomach while Sunwoo looked on in flustered amusement. Your face had heated up considerably, and you barely managed to follow him down the steps toward the bus stop. “You what?” You asked, once you could get out anything other than wheezes.
He chuckled, shrugging. “Okay, well, I actually know him from this music summer camp we both went to in high school. I didn’t realize he came to this uni until I saw him last year and… well, made my presence known to him.”
You clapped your hands together and collapsed onto the bus bench. “I was gonna say—that’s one hell of a hello.”
“It’s a true story,” he insisted.
“Oh, I believe you.”
The two of you shared a laugh for a moment and Sunwoo took a seat beside you, his knee bouncing up and down as you waited for the bus to come by. He nudged your shoulder with his. “So what about you then? How do you know Han?”
“Hm? Ah, I just know him ‘cause we share the same major-ish. I’m sound and music production, and he’s just a general music major,” you explained. “We also share a composition class, as well as a writing course. Did you know the guy is a fantastic poet?”
Sunwoo’s eyebrows arched upward. “I would not be surprised; the guy’s an ace.”
“Totally agree.” You fidgeted with your phone between your hands. “He was also one of my first friends here after I transferred. He’s kind of shy, but he’s one of the good eggs you can meet.”
A nod. He glanced over at you, his eyes breathing in the far away look on your face. “Yeah, he is. But hey, at least you got to befriend him then, hm? Maybe some things are just meant to be.”
You met his gaze and Sunwoo felt his heart stutter into a gallop. “Yeah,” you murmured, “I think so, too.”
— ✶
You and Sunwoo ended up in one of the booths of the restaurants on the Avenue. It was a cozy, little hole in the wall with soup that tasted like home and made your belly feel warm and content. You had set up shop at your table, your laptop with the audio file pulled up and your wired earbuds plugged in. You had to power all of your will into not showing Sunwoo how nervous you were for him to listen to this—your fingers shook slightly even as you passed him both of your earbuds.
In an attempt to pass off as cool, calm and totally collected, you brought your glass of water to your mouth to sip on. You'd thought to order food first, then let Sunwoo listen to the file.
"Let me know if you can't hear anything," you blurted out just before he put the buds in.
He paused, then smiled. "I got it," he assured you warmly.
Once the buds were fitted and the song started playing, you could only wait and watch to gauge his reaction.
At first, his eyes widened a smidge. Then he slowly began nodding to the beat, eyes falling closed as he soaked in the electric guitar chords mixed in that Jisung helped you out with. You watched him lean back in his seat… saw the smile bloom on his face, wide like a flower opening its petals to greet the brilliant sun.
And that beautiful smile… oh, he was so pretty when he smiled.
It was a couple minutes later that his eyelids finally fluttered open, and yet that smile on his face remained ingrained there. He passed you your earbuds as you awaited the verdict. "Girl, you've got pipes," he said with emphasis, his face screwed up in an expression one could only describe as appreciative. "Like—oh my god, I want that bridge tattooed on my forehead," he groaned and leaned forward to bury his face in his palms.
Your heart could fly, soar, literally ascend to fucking space! You smiled, big and wide, as you wrapped up the wire chords around three fingers. "I'm glad you liked it."
"Liked it?" He perked up, then melted to the table as he mumbled into his hoodie sleeve, "I could kis…" You didn't catch the end bit of his sentence as his voice dissipated into the fabric of his shirt.
"What'd you say?"
When he lifted his head, his cheekbones had flushed a shade of rose gold. He cupped the back of his neck with a nervous laugh, "Nothing! It was nothing. I just—I just love it, Yn. Really, I mean it. I'm not just saying that because we're friends—"
"Ah, so we're friends?" You jested, even as your heart skipped like a pebble across the surface of a lake.
Sunwoo blinked, lips pursed. "We're not friends?"
"No, I'm only kidding!" You said and leaned your cheek against your fist. "Your reaction was cute though."
You swore something shuddered across his face, but you didn't have much time to analyze it when you felt a presence make himself clear at the head of the table.
Yangyang appeared in a warm-looking jacket and scarf, his eyes flickering curiously between you and Sunwoo. You suddenly felt an anxious spike in your chest at the thought of what this might have looked like to him. That was, until he saw the laptop, of course. You saw the relief in his shoulders, the ease in which he smiled now. "Hey Yn-ie, didn't know you'd be here."
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Sunwoo scratch his jawline, then scoot forward and offer his hand to Yangyang. "Hey, I'm Sunwoo. You're Yangyang, aren't you?"
Yangyang clasped Sunwoo's hand good naturedly with a typical gummy smile. "Yeah, that's me. It's nice to meet you."
"I was just showing him the project," you said next, drawing both of the boys' attention to you.
"Ah," your friend nodded. "How'd you like it, Sunwoo?"
Sunwoo lit up. "It was—incredible. I don't even know how to describe it, y'know? If it was on my Spotify, it'd probably be on my Wrapped."
There went your heart, goodness. You and Sunwoo locked eyes across the table, and you wished you could convey how much his words meant to you by just a look.
"Totally agree," Yangyang nodded. "My Yn-ie's got a gift and she knows how to use it." He gave your head a gentle pat, and heat rose to your cheeks from the bombardment of attention. It hit you subtly, an epiphany—
Yangyang cleared his throat then and returned his hand to his side. "Anyways, I'll leave you two to it. I'll talk to you later?" He asked you as he was already taking a step backward.
—the heat wasn't for him. It simply wasn't.
"Yeah! I'll shoot you a text later," you promised. You realized then that you had barely even spoken to Yangyang since your Valentine's Day date ended several weeks ago. There had just been a lot of mixed feelings churning around in your head that needed time to be sorted out. (And it was currently being resolved.) With a slight inward grimace, you turned your focus back to the guy you'd brought here in the first place.
Sunwoo slid your laptop over to your side of the table. "Soooo… you and Yangyang, huh?" He laughed, and you weren't certain, but it sounded a bit unsteady.
You played with the hem of your sweater sleeve. "I mean, kind of? Not really? We went on that date a while back, if you remember, but that's about it."
He leaned in. "Yeah, I remember."
"Yeah, and we also haven't had time to really properly talk since?" You winced. "I guess it's not really as bad as I make it sound. It's just that, we've pretty much known each other since primary school. He had just moved from Taiwan, and we were pretty good friends. And he would move back and forth between here and this one town in Germany, but we would always—" you made a vague gesture, "—find each other? Is that the word?"
You let out a breathy sort of laugh. "I'm sorry, I dunno why I'm telling you my history with this guy. It's stupid."
Sunwoo frowned and shook his head. "It's not stupid, Yn."
You inhaled, then chewed on your cheek. "It's just that I always feel like people don't really stick around, at least for me. But Yangyang… he's been one of the few constants in my life, and I'm really grateful for that."
"I'm sensing there's a 'but' with this."
You indulged him. "But I'm starting to think that maybe I can't really see him as that kind of constant, if that makes sense." Your brows furrowed in thought. The boat you were on rocked roughly with the waves, the water turbulent and unsteady, as if at any moment it could throw you off. But you were used to the rocking, and you weren't sure why you should be so used to it. Settling for Yangyang even though you were beginning to realize that he probably wasn't The One? That was like staying docked in a home port you'd grown used to when you yearned for the horizon.
You heard Sunwoo crack his knuckles, and perhaps there really was a certain sheen to his eyes then. "I don't want to put words in your mouth," he drawled carefully, "and I can't imagine how exactly you feel and I don't know your whole story. But it has to be hard when it feels like, I don't know, like people are moving on without you." The earnestness in his eyes made his dark brown eyes deeper and richer. "And maybe it's comfortable with Yangyang and you want to try with him because you know that you two will always somehow find each other again."
"You kind of put what I was thinking into coherent sentences there," you mused, the corners of your lips curling upward.
Sunwoo reflected your expression. "That's good to hear, because I was pretty sure I sounded arrogant."
You laughed then, shaking your head. "No, I appreciated that. And you got it right." Breathing a sigh, you saw a waiter coming by to drop off the food the two of you had ordered. "I think it's just taken me some time with myself and with—with other people to make me realize it."
He glanced up with thanks as the waiter passed you your meals, and you swore you saw his hand make a move to reach for yours across the table. But he stopped short, and instead, helped move your hot bowl of soup over to you. "You never know," he said sheepishly, "The One could be right under your nose."
— ✶
eric 🤨: dude where did u go??? cobie hyung and i looked up and u disappeared into thin air
eric 🤨: omg jisung said u went somewhere w a GIRL??? IS THIS THE GIRL U WERE GETTING ALL DRUNK AND SAD ABT 👀
sunwoo’s phone: YAH!!! OH MY GOD STFU
eric 🤨: no.
EPISODE FIVE: LOTS OF THINGS BLOOM IN SPRING
“SO her name is DJ Dove?”
Sunwoo made a face around his toothbrush as he spat the frothy white into the sink bowl. “For the millionth time, yes.” Through the mirror, Sunwoo watched Eric’s face as his roommate perched himself atop the kitchen counter and went quiet, his face pensive. After coming home to Eric’s confrontation, Sunwoo promised to explain it all in the morning to him.
It was unfortunately the morning, meaning Sunwoo had spent the past hour bringing Eric up to speed on his nonexistent love life. Fortunately, it was also a Wednesday morning, which meant you had just posted your newest episode of the podcast, and Sunwoo could force Eric to listen to it with him. A part of him was tense at the thought of no longer “gatekeeping” his little secret that he had kept for the past several months, but this was Eric, one of his best friends. Maybe this would lift a weight off of Sunwoo’s chest by finally telling someone.
“...I’m still in the thrall of dead week,” your voice blasted from the speaker of Sunwoo’s phone at high volume, “and it’s come to my attention that next quarter will probably be a lot for me. I guess this is me forewarning you all that I might be late with some episodes because I’ve got this new internship thing.”
Sunwoo dunked his face into the sink bowl as he splashed water over his lathered foam cleanser. “She’s talking about her internship at the performing arts center.”
“How do you—never mind, forget I asked.”
Sunwoo patted his face dry, then opened the medicine cabinet for all of the skincare products he used to start off the day.
“...It’s been awhile since I’ve recommended something myself, so today, do enjoy ‘gone too long’ by lullaboy with me.” The song began a few seconds after you queued it up, and the apartment was then filled with muted vocals and strings.
Sunwoo straightened. He and Eric went quiet for a while as they both let the song sink in. Sunwoo continued to slather sunscreen on his face and neck, and Eric had started up the stove to make a batch of ramen for the both of them.
A peculiar sensation draped itself over Sunwoo’s shoulders, a blanket of something that wasn’t quite calm and wasn’t quite jittery. He didn’t know how to pinpoint or label the weird tightness in his chest. The song was strangely intimate, as almost all the music Sunwoo listened to was, but when it came from another person, it was always a whole new level of intimate. Whenever someone recommended a song, it was a way to view a piece of them—perhaps not a large piece, but a piece nonetheless. If eyes were the windows to the soul, then music was the viewfinder.
Maybe he missed you. But that didn’t make sense—it… it couldn’t make sense. He saw you yesterday, and he was listening to you now. How could he miss you?
“She has good taste,” Eric murmured as the song faded out.
Sunwoo nodded his head in agreement. “Yeah. She does.”
“...Hopefully when you miss me you’ll play that song,” he heard you say in a lighthearted tone, even though he felt almost like the complete opposite. “On that note, Rhaps sent in a message asking about the dance showcase coming up! ‘Are you planning on going, and if so, any acts you’re looking forward to? Isn’t it crazy that we could be sitting next to each other and never even know?’ —”
Eric perked up, his head peering over his shoulder to look at Sunwoo as he came out of the bathroom to join Eric in the kitchen. “That’s you? Rhaps?”
“Rhapsody Anonymous,” Sunwoo corrected. “And don’t judge me!” He added with a pointed look, finger jabbing in Eric’s direction.
Eric shook his head with a giddy sort of grin. “I didn’t say anything.”
For a moment, the two boys went quiet with only your voice and the sounds of the stove keeping them company.
A thought occurred to Eric though, and he worried his bottom lip between his teeth. “Does it ever feel like lying?” He asked and gestured for Sunwoo to grab a couple of bowls from the cabinet.
Sunwoo walked over with the soup bowls, then leaned his hip against the counter next to Eric. “Does what feel like lying?”
“Hiding that you know it’s her.”
Well… Sunwoo idly scratched his jaw. “I guess I never thought about it like that,” he said. All this time, he’d figured it was probably better that he didn’t bring it up to you. After all, you used a pseudonym for a reason and didn’t show your face. Maybe this was just supposed to be your secret passion project that you used as a safe space. He didn’t want to burst your bubble by confronting you with that information. How would he even go about doing it? Oh hey, by the way, I’ve known that you’re this podcast host DJ Dove for a very long time? That probably had ‘awkward’ written all over it.
Eric passed him a pointed glance. “Something to think about then.”
— ✶
Finals week had come and gone, a hurricane of destruction in its own right. But when the storm passed, it gave way to the beautiful cherry blossoms blooming in the quad. As per university tradition, the quad was filled to the brim with students, staff, and tourists alike gathering to pose in the falling pink petals that marked the coming of Spring Break. This was no different for Sunwoo’s friend group who was dragged out to the event by none other than Choi Chanhee. In an effort to appease his friend in some aspect, Sunwoo had come dressed in something decently presentable: black cargo pants, blue denim jacket, and his face fitted in a pair of dark frames (that were definitely not just frames or missing the lenses…).
He shoved his hands into his pockets after taking a peak at the time on his watch. The group had been here for about ten minutes thus far, and half of them had already split off with their significant others to take their own rounds about the quad. They weren't the only ones—in fact, there were probably as many couples as there were people taking grad photos and cosplay photos.
And wait, someone had come in their wedding dress—nothing spelled out Sunwoo's singleness more potently than a couple getting married.
He took a panoramic glance and accidentally watched another couple go in for a kiss. He looked away with a slight frown, blowing a curl out of his eyes. "I hate this more than Valentine's Day," he grumbled.
From beside him, Kevin Moon sighed as he tested a shot with his camera and had to adjust the settings for the right exposure. "You're telling me." When he raised his camera up again, he immediately had to bring it back down with a deadpan expression, "At least on Valentine's Day, people won't photobomb you."
As the group's self-proclaimed Dad, Lee Sangyeon, summoned the attention of the boys who were present for a partial group photo. Sunwoo smiled for it, then returned to his frown. Chanhee had his camera held up as he attempted to take a selfie shot since he had been staking out this one tree trunk that a group of people had just left. Sunwoo had to admire the way Chanhee wordlessly swooped in like a vulture over a dead carcass.
"Aye, Kim Sunwoo," Chanhee exclaimed and beckoned Sunwoo over with a curl of his two fingers. Chanhee's head scanned the immediate area and his nose wrinkled when he realized he was missing someone. "Where did Changmin go? He was literally right… ah."
Chanhee's voice trailed off and a sly, little grin when he located the man in question. "Look."
Sunwoo followed Chanhee's gaze across the field to where he was sneaking up behind a familiar person. Sunwoo had met this girl twice, once when he and Changmin had gone looking for Jacob and the other when he went with Changmin to go see her for moral support. Both times, strangely, had been at the lab. Huh, did she even go home…?
But then Sunwoo observed the way Changmin and CM!Yn looked at each other. Though Sunwoo had seen Changmin's eyes light up before, this was a different sort of twinkle, something softer. There had always been a cloud hanging over Changmin when it came to this girl, always some kind of bittersweetness that held him back. It made a smile crawl onto his lips at the sight of Changmin so happy.
"Wah," Chanhee murmured in awe. "They really mended their relationship well, don't you think?"
Sunwoo pursed his lips with an indulgent nod. "Yeah, I'd think so."
His friend sighed. "Oh, well. Looks like it's just us two then."
Sunwoo stepped forward and took Chanhee's phone from him, swiftly changing it to the forward facing camera. Chanhee struck a few poses beneath the blush pink trees as he soaked in the golden hour sunlight streaking across the lawn. Eventually, Sunwoo turned the camera back around to take shots of both himself and Chanhee.
He adjusted the phone so that the selfie mode could capture both of them when he spotted Chanhee scuttling back over toward him with a pile of pink petals collected in his palms.
Sunwoo's eyes went wide and he leapt backward away from his grinning friend. "Hyung, come on, let's talk about this."
Chanhee cackled and inched forward still. His hair was the exact same color as the flowers cupped in his palms. "Sunwoo-ah," he sang, "I think your hair needs a bit of color."
"I just did my hair this morning!" He whined and pleaded desperately. The last thing he needed was to be plucking stray petals from his curls later tonight. When Chanhee still wouldn't quit, adrenaline began to pump through Sunwoo's veins in anticipation for what he needed to do next. "Chanhee hyung! We can be civil about this."
"Civility is overrated!"
Just as Chanhee pounced, Sunwoo swerved on the ball of his foot and made a mad dash toward the other side of the quad. Chanhee's giggles filled the late afternoon air like the twinkling of bells, and though it was probably an amusing sight for onlookers, Sunwoo was running for his life.
Sunwoo pumped his legs furiously as he weaved in between people standing and taking their pictures, screaming out apologies for photobombing them as he went. And when he nearly tripped over someone's dog, he managed to lock eyes with yours.
You. Oh my god, you were here.
He had little time to fully comprehend what he was about to do, but he made a beeline for you.
"Sunwoo, hey—oh!"
Sunwoo grabbed your shoulders and careened himself behind you, his face partially hidden behind yours. "I'm sorry, but—" he screeched, "—he's threatening to ruin my hair!"
Chanhee laughed as he stopped in front of you and Sunwoo. His pale cheeks were dusted with the color of the flowers in the air. "Ah, well, hello. This isn't very gentlemanly of you, Sunwoo. Who's this?" He threw Sunwoo a look over your shoulder.
Fuck. He hadn't thought this one through.
Sunwoo laughed sheepishly and let go of your shoulders to clasp the back of his neck. It was only then he realized you were wearing a delicate, pastel sundress with cherry blossoms littered in your own hair. A gentle breeze wafted by and through your skirt and brushed back a few strands of your hair too.
Pretty…
"This is," he stammered, snapping out of his daze, "Yn. Yn-ie, this is one of my close friends, Chanhee."
"It's nice to meet you," Chanhee said with a warm smile and slight bow of his head.
You gave a little wave. "Nice to meet you, too, despite the circumstances."
"I would wave back," Chanhee gestured with his hand of flowers, "but this is a nice pile, don't you think?"
To your credit, you played along. You laughed, "I totally agree. It definitely should not be wasted on giving me a wave. Though, I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunities to get back at Sunwoo." You turned your head and cocked a brow at him, to which he smiled back boyishly.
Chanhee considered you again for a moment. "I like your style. I guess I'll just… leave you to it then," he drawled and sent Sunwoo very pointed glances with his eyes toward you. Something about the way Chanhee's eyes narrowed minutely made Sunwoo want to hide behind you again.
Chanhee whistled a merry tune as he went on his way, leaving you and Sunwoo to your own devices as he probably went to go find his next victim.
"I'm so sorry about that," Sunwoo lamented as soon as Chanhee was out of ear shot. "I did not mean to make you a human shield."
You chuckled. "It's okay, dude, really. Definitely didn't think I'd find anyone I knew in this mess, so it's nice seeing you out here."
Sunwoo gave you yet another once over and felt heat crawl up the column of his neck. "I—you look really pretty," he said, gesturing to your outfit.
"Oh, thank you," you chirped. "You clean up quite well yourself."
The two of you shared a smile then and for a second, Sunwoo's mouth went dry and no words leapt from his tongue. They all remained lodged in his throat where his heartbeat went pitter-patter.
He cleared his throat, breaking eye contact with you for a moment.
You made a vague nod toward one of the open benches lining the perimeter of the quad, an invitation. "Wanna come sit with me?"
"Do I?" Yes. The answer was yes.
When you and Sunwoo were seated side by side, centimeters separating your arms and legs from touching the other, his heart still had not settled. The adrenaline, in fact, also had her to dissipate. With wide eyes, he soaked everything in.
"Did you go to the winter showcase on Friday night?" He blurted, turning to you.
You met his gaze. "I did. It was such a cool experience, especially since it was my first time. Did you?"
He nodded, locking his lips. "I did, yeah," he murmured. "I had a couple friends performing, so we all went to cheer them on. It's always a really great time though; I'm glad you got to go."
"Oh, that's nice. I always find dancers so impressive," you said with a wistful gleam in your eyes. "Do you dance?"
He found himself fidgeting with Chanhee's phone that he still held onto in his lap. "A little," he admitted bashfully. "I took an intro to hip-hop class last year, and I sometimes dance with my friends. Just—not in public," he said.
For a second, something flickered across your face. But he must have been dreaming because it was gone as quickly as it came.
"So music and dance? You're a multi-talented threat, Sunwoo."
"Aw, not really," he giggled. He wanted to hide his burning face in the collar of his jacket, but there was something about you that also made him unafraid to show you this side of him. Actually, you made this side of him come out. He wasn't usually so terribly shy, always tumbling over his words and doing diction cartwheels… communications major, his ass. "What about you? You're literally a musical genius. You should be on my Spotify Wrapped, Yn."
This time, he could relish in making you flustered. "Aye, you can't say that and expect me not to wanna…" You lost your own words, biting your tongue.
He didn't know what got into him, but he leaned forward closer to you. "Expect you not to what?" He asked lowly, teasingly.
Your breath hitched in your throat, and he swore his own rapidly-beating organ was going to come flying out of his chest.
"Expect me not to—steal your glasses!" With a high-pitched squeal, you snatched the lensless frames from right off his nose.
Sunwoo gasped in scandal, diving to grab them back, but you had already stood up from the bench. "Yah! Those were expensive frames!"
Your face lit up as you donned them. "You'll have to take it off my face then!"
"Bet!" And he lurched after you as you took off into the setting sun.
Your voices echoed across the quad: "Jisuuuuuung! Jisung, save me!"
"Jisung can't save you when he's scared of me!"
EPISODE SIX: AND THE MUSES ARE OFF!
"IT'S not a date!"
"It's a date!"
"It's not a date!" Sunwoo stopped abruptly in the middle of his living room where he had been wearing a hole in the wood floors from pacing. He whirled on his sock-clad heels to face his sofa of judges, Changmin and Chanhee. Eric was out with his girlfriend watching the newest action movie that had come out over Spring Break. "She would say if it was a date, right?"
Chanhee smacked his palm against his forehead with a puff of air. Changmin, however, leaned back on the couch with a ponderous look on his face and rubbed his chin with his thumb and forefinger. "She probably would. She seems like she has more balls than you."
"Hey!"
Changmin grinned. "Just saying." He then leaned down to pick up his duffle bag sitting at his feet. "I've gotta run now, but let me know how it goes."
Sunwoo leveled a scowl at him as he passed by to go to the door. "I hope CM!Yn trips you in the practice room."
"Into her arms!" He hollered back, which was swiftly followed by the front door slamming shut.
While Changmin was headed out to meet CM!Yn at the practice room for her first time returning to dance after three years, Sunwoo and Chanhee were left to prepare Sunwoo for today's agenda. Yesterday, you and he had traded numbers, to which you had immediately asked if he'd wanted to hang out with you some more over Spring Break. The answer had been as easy as counting to three.
Now the only problem was to not freak out over it.
"You're picking up lunch, aren't you?" Chanhee asked as he shoved Sunwoo into the bathroom.
Sunwoo nodded shallowly and picked up his round brush and blow-dryer. "Mhm. I'm meeting her at the performing arts building, and we're gonna take the metro up to Lake Anchor. Ever been up there?"
Chanhee fixed the collar of Sunwoo's white button-up, then snatched the brush and blowdryer out of his hands to do it for him. "Nope. Heard it's nice up there though."
"Yeah," Sunwoo muttered, nearly dropping the serum bottle in his hands. "She said her friend Sieun recommended it."
"Ah."
It wouldn't have felt like a date as much if Sunwoo hadn't searched up Lake Anchor when you'd texted him about it last night. The place was gorgeous, a certified calendar-worthy landscape with purple mountain majesties in the back and shores lined with emerald green hills and willow trees. It didn't help that the Reddit pages all deemed it a "couple's picnic spot you can't miss." Oh, he wasn't going to miss it, all right.
Thirty minutes later, he found himself outside the doors to the performing arts center where you said you were currently taking a tech lesson from Bang Chan. He had a paper bag of snacks and sandwiches from the local convenience store in one hand and the other tucked away into his pocket.
He wondered if he could go in and see you, but he'd already texted you he was waiting outside, and you'd replied you were on your way out.
Just as he was about to go sit on one of the benches, one of the doors at the entrance opened. You emerged out into the late spring morning with the breeze in your hair, a tote bag slung over one shoulder, and a ukulele case hanging from the other. You smiled wide at him and waved.
Sunwoo's lips parted into a grin. "Hi. I got us snacks," he said and lifted the brown bag in his hand.
"Sunwoo, you didn't have to," you pursed your lips fondly, adjusting your bag straps.
"I wanted to." The two of you fell into step in the direction of the closest metro station. It would be a short walk from here into the university Avenue, and down a block to the station. Everything was conveniently placed in the name of accessibility. "Plus, I didn't really eat breakfast," he admitted.
"Me neither." You cupped half your face with your palm. "Aish. I always forget I have, like, yogurt in the fridge, y'know?"
Sunwoo chuckled. "Yeah, I get that. My roommate and I always forget that we have groceries in the fridge because we always see the ramen packets on the counter instead. How was the lesson with Chan?"
The two of you stopped at the intersection to wait for the light. You hugged your ukulele to your chest. "It was good! He's always really helpful and knowledgeable—and patient," you mused. "I hope you don't mind me bringing my uke along though. I thought it would be a nice form of entertainment once we got up to the lake."
"I'm not entertaining enough for you," he gasped melodramatically, jutting his bottom lip out in a pout.
You laughed, and the sound made him break his pout and smile. "I thought I would be the entertaining one for once. D'you know how to play?"
The crosswalk sign turned on for you, and you both made your way across.
"I know some guitar," Sunwoo answered, "but just the basics. They teach you a bit at summer music camp." As he walked by your side, he felt his hand brush against the back of yours. "My hyung—Jacob—he plays guitar pretty well. He's good at singing, too, like you."
He caught your smile from the corner of his eye.
"He did it to woo his girlfriend," he jested, sticking his tongue in his cheek when he remembered how JC!Yn brought him and Haknyeon up to speed last quarter about her love life antics.
You chuckled. "That's a shame you know the trick," you said with an impish twinkle in your eyes, "because that was exactly my plan."
Sunwoo came to a screeching halt in the middle of the walkway, and when you realized he was still staring wide-eyed at the sidewalk, you let out a laugh and went back to drag him along to the station.
— ✶
The view was something out of a magazine, the kind that took one's breath away. You and Sunwoo had claimed the shade beneath a willow tree and settled down across from each other with the brown paper bag flattened out to display the feast he had purchased. There were other small groups of people around, as well, all of whom seemed to have the same ideas as you two as they soaked up sun, read books and napped in the shade, and picnicked along the grassy shoreline. There was even a small booth a mile down the bank that rented out swan-shaped paddle boats and canoes for people to take out onto the water.
You and Sunwoo had pretty much demolished all of the goodies he brought with him. The conversation had been flowing, simple and organic, and you felt at peace—that was the best way to describe it. Maybe it was the location, the circumstance, the company, or all three.
You picked up your ukulele from where it laid in its case by your side. "Any suggestions?" You queried, taking the instrument out and checking that it was in tune.
Sunwoo brushed his hands of crumbs and braced his palms on the grass behind him. It was the visual of him in that white shirt, his sleeves rolled up and collarbone exposed, jawline clean and sharp as he gazed out at the view that made your heart race again. "Hmm," he hummed, "what did you first learn on it?"
"I think I taught myself Lemonade by Jeremy Passion," you said to him and scoured your brain for the right chords. You strummed a G-flat minor, and when it sounded about right, you shifted to B, until you managed to jog your memory of all four chords.
He watched you with softened eyes, his knees pulled up to his chest now as he leaned his cheek onto the tops of his knees. "That's a good song," he murmured.
"Do you know the lyrics?"
He chuckled, shaking his head and flicking his wrist. "Oh, no, no. I don't sing."
"Doesn't sound like you can't," you quipped back with a teasing tilt in your smile. You swayed a little as you played the tune over and over again. "A little shy, are we?"
You could see the smile peeking from his lips even when he tried to hide it in his arms. "I don't sing a lot."
"If I sang the first verse, would you join me in the chorus?" You offered as a compromise. You wouldn't push after this if he still refused, but there was a part of you that felt like you needed to hear this beautiful man sing for you.
He balked for a second, toeing at the dirt. Then, "Okay. I'll join in at the chorus."
A smile bloomed on your face. "Excellent."
You were a little shaky going in yourself. Though you had definitely practiced this song more times than you could count, performing it for someone else was always like playing it for the first time. And you wanted Sunwoo to enjoy it, and to be impressed by you. You wanted to do well for him and to be able to encourage him.
As he said he would, you heard him join in at the chorus—softly, at first, until he was the main vocal and you could bolster him with the harmony.
His eyes met yours, all smiles, as the song continued on. The ending verse… dear god, you could fall over from pure giddiness at the way he nailed the runs and you could do a little showing off with your strumming. Shivers, just plain shivers.
"She's exactly what… I need," he crooned, fingers playing absentmindedly with a strand of grass.
You let the vibrations of the strings linger in the spring air for a moment. It was like the two of you were encased in this bubble all by yourselves; and it was beautiful. It was perfect.
"I knew you could sing," you said to him. "I just had a feeling."
He hung his head, but the smile on his face could not be suppressed. "Thanks."
"For what?"
"For encouraging me," he shook his head. "Believing in me."
You pursed your lips together thoughtfully and you wished you could pick his brain without risking total invasion. "Do people not believe in you often?" You asked quietly, shifting to move yourself around the pile of rolled-up trash and to sit next to him.
He followed your lead, scooting himself next to you until you were no longer opposite, but adjacent. "Not people, just me, I think."
"Ah." You could empathize.
He gave a shallow nod. "Do you ever get scared of making a mistake so you don't—I dunno—go for it? And then you end up thinking that maybe not taking that risk was the mistake?"
You set your ukulele down in the case beside you and mirrored his position, arms looped around your legs. "I do. All the time actually, and it's a scary feeling."
"Yeah," he exhaled. "Sometimes I wish I had just gone into music, full-on. I mean, a communication major is useful and all, but there are times when I wonder where I would have been if I had nurtured that passion."
His words resonated within you. There was a reason why you transferred to this university and decided to leave your original plan behind. You had gone into college with an intent to major in Computer Science, but less than a year in, it had become abundantly clear to you how unhappy you were. Leaving wasn't just a choice, it had been a need.
You turned to look at Sunwoo and you felt your chest tug toward him. You bumped his leg with your knee. "You still have time," you said. "It's not too late to still see where that goes."
But you knew the conflict that warred in his head; you knew it all too well because you had experienced it firsthand. It was much more complicated than simply chasing after one's dreams. There was obligations, expectations, fears, and physical obstacles that made the situation more complex than it seemed at first glance. You didn't know his family situation, didn't know the whole story of why he hadn't taken his summer music camp experiences and translated it into his current college career.
You didn't know it all… but you wanted to. You wanted to know everything about him.
"You said you don't have a minor figured out yet, right?" You asked suddenly, an idea coming to you.
He hummed. "Yeah."
"Well, why don't you choose music as your minor?" When he didn't answer right away, you added, "You obviously don't have to decide right this second—it's just something to think about."
(It seemed he had a lot he needed to think about lately.)
Sunwoo rose up and leaned back onto his palms again. When he turned to look at you, a sense of calm had come over him this time. "I really appreciate you."
You broke into a smile. "I appreciate you, too."
"No, really," he laughed, then bit his lip. "I'm sorry for screwing the mood—"
"You're not! Really," you insisted. "I don't mind. I like having meaningful conversations with people who mean a lot to me."
He didn't even have to say anything, because there was this look, one you simply could not ignore. It made your stomach feel like it was swarmed with butterflies and that you were walking on air. It was like watching him smile while listening to the song you wrote, like walking out of the performing arts center to see him waiting for you. He didn't have to say anything because you knew—you had to. There simply could not be any other explanation, right?
EPISODE SEVEN: WHAT IF SOULS FEEL FAMILIAR FOR A REASON?
YOU had been keeping a secret.
"So what you're saying is that you know that he knows, but he doesn't know that you know that he knows?"
You nodded, arms crossed. "Yeah, pretty much."
Jisung made a face and rested his temple against his palm. "My brain hurts."
From where she was perched on a stool, Park Sieun reached over and patted Jisung's nest of hair. "It is a little confusing. Why don't you just confront him about it?"
"I don't know," you huffed and fell back against the wall. The three of you were holed up in one of the private studios on campus. There weren't many buildings opened since it was still Spring Break, but many of the performing arts facilities were. Jisung had offered for you and Sieun to meet him in the room he had snagged and had been currently occupying in order to bust out as much creative energy as possible. (Newsflash, it was not going well, hence, yours and Sieun's invitations.) Studio rooms were pretty much soundproof, so they were good for those in the music programs who wanted a private space to practice or record things.
You had just brought them up to speed on your latest outing with a certain Kim Sunwoo up to Lake Anchor, as Sieun had so graciously suggested to you the other day. After your outing, however, you'd come to one very solid conclusion.
Well, and there was the matter of The Anonymous Situation.
Just this morning, you had opened your inbox to find another submission from one of your regular anonymous listeners whom you affectionately nicknamed Rhaps. Rhapsody Anonymous had begun to pop up in your inbox just last quarter, and it wasn't until recently that you figured out who it was. At first, it seemed completely implausible for Sunwoo to be the face behind the name, because there was no way out of a whole internet of people that he had managed to stumble across your podcast.
To make matters more complex, you had an inkling that he also knew that you were the host of Songbird Station. He had sent you something along the lines of: "Hey Dovey! I stumbled across this song recently that I haven't heard in awhile. It's called Lemonade, and I realize that I've only actually heard the ukulele vers. LOL anyways, I hope you're not too busy this Spring Break and that you've had time to relax. I've always wondered though… have you ever met someone who feels familiar to you? Not like in a 'I've reunited with you after five years' kind of familiar, but like… something more like kindred spirits……"
The whole message had the same amount of sweetness he always used to contact and interact with you, but the recommendation of the song Lemonade simply could not be a mere coincidence. You just couldn't accept that.
You had pondered this for a long time—the possibility of confronting him about his anonymous persona. And of course, there were several things that held you back from doing so. "I mean," you began, pushing off from the wall to slowly pace the little room available, "I don't want to scare him, y'know? Like I'm sure there's a reason why he goes by a pseudonym like I do, and I don't want to burst that bubble.
"Plus," you continued, "what if I'm just thinking about this all wrong? What if I've read the signs completely out of proportion and he's not actually Rhapsody Anonymous? That would just be embarrassing."
You stopped in front of your friends with your hands positioned on your hips and your head quirked to the side in thought.
"Would it really be so bad if you brought it up, like, even subtly?" Sieun asked you, her pink-tinted lips pursed slightly.
Jisung piped up, too, "Yeah, Sunwoo's a pretty cool guy. And based on what I've seen between the two of you and what you've told us, I don't think he would laugh at you or anything."
"I don't think he would laugh at me either," you confessed. "It's just kinda scary."
The two murmured their agreement. Though Sieun was your trio's only extrovert, you actually had no idea how you'd come to be decently close friends with these two. You chalked it up to all frequenting similar social circles. The music program was always a good way to make friends, and you were glad that it had yet to fail you, even in college.
Sieun made a vague gesture with her hand. "I think you should try, though. I'm sure you'll find a way to slide it in," she chuckled.
Jisung snorted. "I have never seen that man so flustered in his life."
"Yeah, he has to be whipped for you, Yn-ie."
A cough from the boy in the room. "Not like you're any more whipped than he is."
"Han Jisung!" You reprimanded, heat swarming to your cheeks.
He broke into a boyish grin, eyes wide and alight like a chipmunk. "What? Don't give me the government name; you know it's true!"
Even Sieun was laughing behind her oh-so delicately placed hand. "He's got a point."
You sighed, wrinkling your nose. "I came for support, not a call out."
"Are those not the same things—AH, I'M SORRY DON'T WHACK ME—!"
— ✶
There was a place on the Avenue with the best lime soda, as Sunwoo had claimed, when the two of you coordinated to get lunch together. Because you had chosen the place of your last hangout, you'd insisted that he chose a place this time. By his texts, he had seemed pleasantly surprised to be hanging out again so soon, and while your nerves were high in anticipation for the coming conversation, you also couldn't wait to spend time with him some more.
You met outside the storefront of a Vietnamese restaurant that you'd only seen in passing, and had yet to try. You glanced up from your phone just as Sunwoo came up from down the road toward you, dressed in jeans and a bomber jacket.
"Hey, sorry to keep you waiting," he said as he swung the door open for you.
You and he ducked inside. "It's no worries," you assured him. "Hope you're not sick of me just yet."
You saw that boyish grin of his as he caught your eyes and signaled the waiter for a table for two. "Never."
When the two of you were seated, your eyes greedily took in the options laid out on the menu. There were just far too many appetizing items—maybe you should have scouted out the menu beforehand.
"Any favorites?" You queried from over the rim of your menu.
Sunwoo was slinging his shoulder bag over his head as you asked this. "Oh, uh, I've been hooked on their shrimp banh xeo ever since my friend Haknyeon introduced me to it. It's like a Vietnamese crepe with stir fried vegetables and a protein. But I think in general, everything is pretty good here."
You hummed. "Mmh, sounds good. And you said the lime soda is really good, too?"
He nodded his head vigorously. "Yes, for sure. That stuff is addicting."
You took his word for it, and soon, the two of you had finished ordering your lunch for the day. A part of you wished you didn't have to disturb the pleasantness of this one-on-one lunch date (was this a date?) with Sunwoo by bringing up the podcast, but what if by clearing the air, it would make your relationship stronger? (Or, it could end in a fiery, hot pile of shit!)
Either way, you would try to get to it as organically as possible.
"So I wanted to talk to you about something." Yes, because this is totally organic, Yn… You grabbed your cup of lime soda and played absentmindedly with the straw.
You gauged his reaction carefully. He perked up. "You—you wanted to talk to me about something?" He parroted, pointing his finger back at himself. "That's not usually good."
"Sorry, no, it's not bad!" You promised. On the way here, you had come up with about a dozen ways to go about this, but at the end of the day, there would only be a yes or no answer. "Do you, by chance, happen to listen to podcasts?"
There was that flicker of recognition over his face, and for a second, he reminded you of something like a puppy with how wide his eyes were. "Uhh," he drawled, scratching his head and feigning nonchalance, "I mean, sometimes. Like casually."
"This might sound weird—"
"Uh-huh."
"—but are you Rhapsody Anonymous?"
If sweat could be animated, that was what you imagined to be dripping down the side of Sunwoo’s face at this moment. He seemed to be figuring out a way to reply. “Would you believe me if I asked you what a Rhapsody Anonymous is?”
“No, not really.”
“What’s a podcast?”
You huffed. “Sunwoo—”
“Okay,” he relented, slumping over slightly. He seemed nervous, in a way, eyes looking anywhere but you, twirling his straw between his thumb and index finger, his foot tapping furiously against the linoleum floor. “I’m sorry! I didn’t really want to bring up the podcast to you because I thought that you enjoyed the anonymity, y’know?” He told you with an apologetic wince. “And I really liked listening to the show, so I thought it wouldn’t hurt to interact with you anonymously, as well, and over time, I thought we’d kinda become friends.”
He peered up at you nervously, and guilt wormed its way into the trenches of your gut. From what it seemed, he must have really thought that you would react negatively to him knowing your podcast-hosting side show.
“We are friends,” you finally said and scooped a lock of hair out of your face. “I’m not like, mad, or anything; it was more of me trying to figure out why you felt so familiar to me. And I’m really honored that you liked my podcast enough to want to interact with me there. It means a lot.”
With your small smile, Sunwoo’s posture flooded with relief. “So you’re not mad that I figured out your identity?”
“Definitely not,” you shook your head. “If anything, I’m relieved. I’ve been wondering about your identity for a while now.”
The corners of Sunwoo’s mouth lifted. “That’s… that’s cool. This is really cool,” he said. He let out a sigh, leaning back to slump in his chair with a dramatic expression of anguish on his face. “You have no idea how much it’s been eating me up inside, Dovey! Like how do you balance your two identities? It takes so much energy for me to make sure I keep them separate.”
“I can tell; you weren’t exactly the most inconspicuous,” you teased.
He sat up. “What do you—”
“Well, you kind of told me things in person that you’ve told to me on anonymous, and vice versa.” You recalled to him the two main instances that gave him away to you. It was amusing to see the way he grew increasingly more flustered as you kept talking about it, but you realized that this was probably incredibly painful for him to hear.
Sunwoo had his head in his hands by the time you were done. “I’m an idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot.”
He shifted slightly so that his cheek rested against one palm. “And to think that I was being all slick and secretive,” he pouted, scrunching up his nose. “You know, I always thought about being friends with you in real life. That one time that I told you about that one Taylor Swift song that reminded me of you?”
“Superstar?”
“Yeah, that’s the one.” He meditated on that thought while sipping his drink. “It just felt right. Like you were far away but also right there in my ear. Does that make sense?”
You knew what the song was about; you could recite the lyrics by heart, and the fact that he associated that song with you… It sent your heart a-flutter. “It does.”
He jolted up so suddenly you nearly fell out of your seat with him. “Not that I’m desperately in love with you or anything,” he added quickly, the words tumbling out of his mouth as fast as he mentally skimmed through the lyrics again and again. His cheeks were tinged with pink, and you were sure that your neck looked as hot as it felt.
You pretended your heart didn’t drop to the pit of your stomach when he said that. You laughed along with him, though you weren’t sure why it sounded like it did. “Oh, right, right. I didn’t think that; don’t worry.” All the butterflies in your stomach drooped.
Sunwoo scrambled to find the right words. “I just mean that I always felt like some average Joe, and you were…” He gestured to you helplessly, “you.”
Your heart couldn’t help but give a sharp pang at that.
“And how could I ever be anything more to you than just another listener in your stats, y’know?”
You never thought that you would have ever given off that kind of vibe toward listeners, or come to mean that much to any members of your audience. It had seemed simply impossible for you to ever become large enough to evoke that kind of feeling in people—a popstar to their fans. You folded your arms over the table and leaned toward him. “Sunwoo, you were never just another listener. You made yourself known to me and you made me feel like I wasn’t alone.”
He slowly met your eyes, and you sat up straighter, reaching toward the paper straw wrapper to fidget with. “I originally started this podcast because I needed a place to talk. After feeling like people were always moving on without me, I was trying to search for validation, and I found that in podcasting. I figured that maybe… if I was feeling these things, then there had to be someone out there who was feeling them, too.
“And the song recommendation and music talk was always a nice bonus,” you added. “I had people send in anonymous submissions, but never as frequently as you did, and it made me feel like I was reaching somebody. Not just a random hit every so often, but somebody.”
Sunwoo’s eyes shone in the artificial lighting inside the restaurant, and outside your little bubble, you barely registered the noises around you. It was just you and Sunwoo in this moment in time and space. He swallowed. “You’re really cool, you know that?”
You grabbed your cup of lime soda and softly knocked it against his. “That’s all you, superstar.”
— ✶
Lunch had progressed much smoother after you had confronted Sunwoo, to say the least. You were convinced, however, that you had to meet this Haknyeon character he kept telling you about. He was the one to recommend the Vietnamese restaurant, and he was going to be your new favorite person. (Sorry, Sunwoo.)
When both you and Sunwoo had finished up with lunch, you didn’t want to cut your time with him short and asked him if he’d ever been up to the Farmer’s Market north of the Ave.
“There’s a Farmer’s Market over there?” His mouth gaped as he let you lead him a couple blocks north.
You grinned, tipping your head up to the sky to soak in the last bits of sunlight before it was about to be blanketed over by gray clouds. “Yeah! It’s really neat. They’ve got one going every week, I think.”
The walk up was an easy one as it was a straight shot from the restaurant to the intersection where white picket fences were set up to barricade the street for vendors to set up in. Pop-up tents of different colors and sizes lined either side of the street as people milled about going from vendor to vendor. This had been one of the few gems you’d found when you transferred here, and though you didn’t often visit, you tried to buy at least a couple things to support the local businesses. The fruit here tasted much better than the ones in-stores, anyway.
You and Sunwoo slipped past the fences and into the throng of people, and you watched his face light up in awe as he took in the sights and smells. There were people selling beaded bracelets and art, farmers tossing blueberries into kids’ mouths… it was a lively slice of community here.
“Wow, this is incredible,” he said, but suddenly stopped short. “Oh my god, they’re selling melon pops, Yn-ie!” He pointed out a stand a little further down the way that he had peered over a few heads for. He grabbed your hand and pulled you along with him. “Come on! I’ll treat you to one.”
It wasn’t like you were going to refuse him.
Within another few minutes, you and Sunwoo had both acquired one melon popsicle each. It was adorable to see him bouncing along on the balls of his feet like a kid on Christmas morning as he lapped up the light green juice dripping down the side of the frozen treat.
“—look how pretty those sunflowers are!” He gasped at one of the stands to your left selling bundles of different flowers.
An idea popped into your head, and you scurried over to the booth and traded a two dollar bill for one of the baby sunflowers. You whirled around to where Sunwoo stood and waited for you. “Stand still,” you said while reaching up to tuck the flower behind his ear.
Before he could comprehend what was happening, you pulled out your phone and snapped a quick picture of him.
Sunwoo’s eyes had gone wide, his cheekbones the same color as the roses in the bundles behind you. “What… just happened,” he asked, blinking, then came over to poke your shoulder to get your attention. He peered over at your phone screen to see that you were setting the photo you took as his new contact photo. He let out a hum, “Wow.”
“It’s cute.” You let him see the picture.
He narrowed his eyes at the screen before finally giving it a nod of approval. “Okay, good enough.”
You scoffed, lightly hitting his arm with the back of your hand. “Good enough? I think it’s perfect.” You finished off the rest of your melon pop and tossed the stick in a nearby trash bin.
(If you’d looked up from your phone at that moment, you would have seen the utter bliss on Sunwoo’s face after hearing you compliment a picture of him and calling it “perfect.” To him, absolutely nothing could ruin this day, this moment, this year for him—!)
One raindrop fell onto your phone screen, followed by another, and another, and ano--
(He should not have spoken so soon.)
“It’s raining,” you observed dumbly, reaching a palm out to feel the pitter-patter of the sky’s tears on your skin. Others around you were beginning to notice, too, either huddling under their nearest tent or the overhangs of establishments lined on the sidewalk.
You figured somebody must have pissed the weather off because the rain only began to drum harder against the world.
"Well, shit," you laughed and patted Sunwoo on the back of his shoulder to move him toward the side of the road. "Let's find shelter!"
The two of you joined the crowd as you scrambled past the tents and up onto the sidewalks. Some people simply went into the shops themselves, but you and Sunwoo took a moment to stare out at the once-clear sky. Strange how springtime weather worked.
Sunwoo finished off his popsicle and found a trash bin to toss the stick into. He ran a hand through his dampened locks, then dragged that same palm down his face. "D'you like a little rain, dove?"
The nickname caught you off-guard for a second, but not as badly as seeing the soft-cornered smile on his face.
You cleared your throat. "I don't mind it. How about you?"
He made a frown at the sky as if he could reprimand nature for crashing the date—wait, this wasn't a date, was it? "It would have been nice if the weather report was accurate for once, but a little walk in the rain never hurt anybody."
You voiced your agreement. The next course of action you both decided on was making the long trek home in the rain together. You tried to stay out of the shower as best as you could, but there definitely weren't enough overhangs to get you home completely dry.
At one of the intersections, Sunwoo looked over at you through his dripping wet bangs. "You don't have a jacket."
On instinct, you glanced down at your bare arms, only clad in a T-shirt. "Oh, I guess I don't," you mused.
"Here—" he shouldered off the black bomber jacket and draped it over your shoulders.
"Sunwoo, I can't—"
"Yes, you can," he laughed and shook his head out. The light turned green to cross, and he wrapped an arm around you to keep you steady along the rain-slicked street.
The jacket and arm around you were both warm, but you had a feeling that even without the jacket, his arm would have been more than enough.
When you'd made it to your apartment complex and bursted into the front lobby, you and Sunwoo practically stood in your own self-made puddles. You took the jacket off from around your shoulders and shook it out; it was a shoddy attempt to get the water out, but at least the material was semi-waterproof on the outside.
"Here you…" Your throat went dry as you made to hand his jacket back to him and zeroed in on the way his wet, white T-shirt stuck flush against his skin. There was no other way to describe it but as see through, and there was no way in hell you were going to be able to erase that defined stomach from your mind. "...Go."
You coughed as you looked away, and he accepted his jacket back with a low "Thanks."
When he zipped his jacket up, you nodded toward the elevator. "Do you wanna come up and dry off before you go out? You can totally borrow my umbrella if you want, too."
He shook his head. "No, it's okay. My apartment's not far, I swear."
"Ah, alright. Get home safe then." You paused, then added, "Text me once you get back?"
Sunwoo flashed you a smile, and man, if you could engrave that smile, the wet hair, into your brain… "Promise. I'll see you soon, superstar."
He reached over and ruffled your hair, then ducked out of your apartment into the rain. Just before he was out of your sight, he turned back and waved at you through the front windows.
You let out an exhale once he had disappeared. A fuzzy feeling lingered in your chest, your smile never leaving your face. You were so far gone.
EPISODE EIGHT: SWERVE LIKE A CHICKEN
ALTHOUGH Spring Break had swept through the university faster than it came, Sunwoo could still say he felt like he was riding on Cloud 9. The beginning of the quarter was easily a more relaxed part of the term, but Spring quarter itself was a whole other nightmare in itself. Everyone around him was beginning to wake up from their break-dazed slumbers to clamber their asses back into uncomfortable lecture chairs and study rooms.
It was the first Tuesday back from Spring Break when he found out you were going to be in a practice room alone for a while, working on a new project. This intel had been courtesy of one Han Jisung, who had been texting Sunwoo off and on about a track he had been mixing with Chan.
han !!: yeah just left cuz my brain was feelin super fried 🤣 dunno how ynies still there
sunwoo's phone: oh fr?? she's still over there?
han !!: yuh bro that's what i just said
han !!: r u gonna do anything abt it 👀😳
sunwoo's phone: i have no clue what ur talking abt
han !!: okay bye chicken
sunwoo's phone: u did not just call me chicken.
han !!: 🐓🐓🐓
Sunwoo walked out of his room and stood in the middle of the apartment, staring blankly at the back of Eric's head. His roommate was seated on the couch setting up a movie, and when he sensed someone was staring at him, he began to say, "Baby!—wait a minute."
Eric made a face. "Never mind, it's just you."
Sunwoo scoffed and flopped onto the opposite end of the couch. "Rude! Before EC!Yn, I used to be your one and only."
"That's actually so incorrect—"
"Do you boys ever not cat-fight?" EC!Yn mused as she came out from the bathroom and found a seat between Eric and Sunwoo. Eric instantly curled an arm around her and pulled her into his side.
Sunwoo considered this with a frown. Why was he so single? "You're lucky I tolerate your boyfriend, EC!Yn," said Sunwoo as he folded his arms over his chest and sunk into the shadows of his hoodie.
"I'm glad you've come to like me more than your own best friend," she drawled in jest. "What's got you in the dumps, my friend?"
Eric perked up, pressing the play button on the TV remote to start the movie. "Oh yeah! You were in such a good mood this morning."
A grumble from the lump of hoodie. "It's nothing."
A moment of silence passed. Then, "He misses Yn."
"I think so, too."
"Do you think if we texted her to text him, he would at least smile?"
"Oh, I think I found her Instagram the other day—"
Sunwoo peered out of his hoodie with narrowed eyes. "I can hear you guys, you know that, right?"
Both Eric and his partner shot him impish grins, delighted that their very obvious conversation brought him out of silence. The thought forced a smile onto Sunwoo's face anyway. Eric's baseball game had been canceled today because the team who they were going up against this week had internal problems (something about an affair between coaches and players—it was complicated). Thus, Eric had decided to fill his afternoon with an impromptu movie session with his girlfriend. Sunwoo was invited by roommate obligation.
There were definitely more productive things that Sunwoo could have been doing (finding a minor, finding a job, finding the answers to his cognitive psych homework, etcetera), but watching… Wait, what were they even watching?
EC!Yn reached over and nudged his shoulder with her knuckles. "Hey, Earth to Kim Sunwoo."
He shook out of his daze. "Huh? Oh, sorry." He sighed, pulling out his phone. "Jisung just told me that Yn's at the practice room working still."
"Still?"
"Yeah," he bobbed his head. "They've been there ever since they finished their composition class this morning."
Eric lowered the volume on the TV. "Dude, you should go keep her company."
Sunwoo's eyes shot open as he began mindlessly scrolling through Instagram. "I don’t wanna bother her; she probably doesn’t wanna be bothered if she’s been working for so long.” The thought had crossed his mind to head over to the practice rooms right now and sit in for a session, but he had shut his own idea down almost immediately. Would you appreciate him going to bug you or would you mind him just going to sit with you and enjoy your presence?
“I was thinking the exact opposite,” said EC!Yn, “I mean, whenever Eric comes over unannounced to come sit with me at the dorm, I appreciate it all the time.”
Eric cooed. “Aw, you do?”
Sunwoo blinked and was suddenly glad he was staring down at his phone and not the couple on the couch next to him. But he glanced up to catch EC!Yn’s eyes. “Do you really think she wouldn’t mind?”
When Eric tucked his face into her neck, she idly scratched his head. “Oh, definitely. I think it’ll be a nice surprise, considering she probably feels the same about you, based on what you’ve already told us.”
“You’re right!” Sunwoo shot up off the couch, but halted. “Wait, she what?”
Eric snorted. “She said that Yn probably feels the same about you, which, if I’m being honest, I can’t believe—”
Sunwoo dashed into his room to grab his wallet and keys. “Nobody asked you!”
— ✶
Coffee. You liked coffee, right?
Sunwoo couldn't quite think straight with the giddy anticipation bubbling in his stomach and up his chest as he balanced twin cups of iced americano in his hands. Taking the bus to the School of Music would have been less effort on his legs, but waiting for it simply did not sit with the amount of energy currently carrying him down the street and up the stairs and across the quad like a madman.
People were probably eyeing him weirdly, but he was trying to come up with things to say to you. Preferably, these things were smooth and not strange fragments that weren't properly strung together. He wanted to look put together, to sound put together.
He was probably going to look frazzled, though, from half-running a mile uphill, but that was okay—he was excited to see you.
The School of Music stood right across from the School of Art building, the twin towers looming above the quad stairs. With school back in session, there were plenty of people milling about the entrance, and somebody graciously opened the door for Sunwoo so he didn't have to awkwardly balance his coffees and risk spilling them to get inside. He hadn't often visited this building, but he had been in here before to visit friends and upperclassmen. Though the architecture was grander, it still had the homey feeling of a high school band room, some place music students could call home.
Sunwoo navigated himself toward the practice rooms in the back hallways, murmuring "excuse me"s and apologies as he sidestepped string bassists and bassoons and snare drums. (He could've sworn there was a whole drum kit in one of these; it was strange seeing someone carrying around a single snare… huh.)
He reached the corridor to turn right into the practice hall when he froze, diving back behind the wall.
"—wait, Yangyang—"
Something in him sunk deep into the pit of his stomach, an anchor to the sea floor. He watched you launch out of your practice room and into Yangyang's arms, both of you hugging each other closely. He had his arms wrapped around you and his cheek against the crown of your head.
Sunwoo couldn't hear what you were saying to each other—if you were saying anything at all.
And you didn't let go. Not yet, at least.
When you did finally let go, the two of you were beaming at each other. It was near impossible to make out what kind of emotion was there from so far away, but Sunwoo couldn't look anymore when Yangyang leaned in towards you—
Sunwoo pressed himself against the wall he was peering around.
Oh.
He struggled to swallow; there was a large lump sitting in his throat that he had to wrestle down.
Disappointment—yeah, that was disappointment.
Before you or Yangyang could come down this way, Sunwoo retraced his steps from where he came until he was back outside. He sucked in a breath, mind abuzz.
He set down the cups of iced coffee, now perspiring, on a ledge nearby, so he could pull out his phone.
It rang twice. "Yo."
"Are you practicing right now?" Sunwoo asked, leaning his body against the railing. His free hand held his face as his brain replayed the events he had just witnessed. Did that mean what he thought he meant? You were totally allowed to see other people—the two of you weren't exclusive—but goddamn, did that hurt to think about.
Was he too late? Had he chickened out so long that you decided to move on, or was he never in the running in the first place?
He heard a bit of shuffling from the other side, then a sigh from Changmin. "Now I'm not. What's up?"
"I'm coming over."
A pause. "...Okay, see you soon."
EPISODE NINE: [YELLS.]
THERE was something different in the air and you could taste it. Not literally, of course, but you figured your paranoia had manifested strong enough within you to be able to sniff these kinds of things out. "These things" referred to the slight difference in the way you interacted with Sunwoo, or rather, how Sunwoo interacted with you.
You turned your phone off again, having checked it for what felt like the fifth time in the past two minutes. Usually, he replied relatively fast, but for the past week or so, he'd been a little more delayed. He didn't text dry, which was a relief, but there was something off about it. You couldn't articulate it too well—it was just a gut feeling.
"Oy, phone away, Yn," Sieun ordered, snapping her fingers and holding her hand out across the table.
You sent her a look, but reluctantly handed your phone over to her. "But—"
"No buts!" She tutted. She hid your phone within the confines of her purse before promptly returning to the warm bowl of biang biang noodles in front of her. "The more you check your phone, the sadder of a sap you look."
"Thanks," you deadpanned, but followed her lead and picked up your chopsticks to eat your food.
The two of you were seated in, arguably, the best Chinese restaurant on the Avenue. It had become a fast favorite of yours when you first transferred, saved for the long days and weeks when you needed something like spice to make you feel anything other than sad. Sieun had suggested coming down here for dinner rather than staying in and eating another round of instant ramen. It was something she knew would cheer you up easily, and so far, it was only half working.
You reached for your water, only to realize it was practically empty.
As if she could read your mind, the waitress taking care of your table appeared at your side and filled your water up for you.
"Oh, thank you!" Your eyes glanced over at her name tag—HN!Yn—and met her kind eyes.
"Of course. Anything else I can get you two?" She asked cheerily, swiftly filling up Sieun's cup, as well, with practiced grace. "Food's good?"
Both you and Sieun nodded your heads vigorously, especially since both of your mouths were now full and you couldn't speak. She seemed to get the idea and hustled over to a nearby table to tend to them. How waiters and waitresses always knew when you had food in your mouth, you could never figure out. It was always absolutely awful timing, but you supposed the skill was akin to Starbucks workers butchering name spellings.
When you finally swallowed your bite, you chased it with a gulp of water. "I don't think I did anything wrong," you said to your friend, pushing around the saucy rice in your bowl with the tips of your chopsticks.
Sieun covered her mouth. "I don't think so either," she replied, eyebrows furrowed. "Maybe he's just busy? It could be that he got a job or something, or school work is piling up."
You frowned. You thought he would have let you know he was going to be a bit busier, but at the same time, he didn't owe you anything. You just worried about him and hoped he wasn't overworking himself. It didn't help that you missed hanging out with him; it didn't feel like it used to between you just last week.
From behind you, you heard the door to the restaurant open and close with a loud smack! The door to the restaurant was awfully loud when it closed, unless it was carefully done. Something about the angle at which it was constructed, or something like that.
Sieun's brows flew up. "Speak of the devil," she muttered with her food pushed into her cheek.
"Hm?" You hummed and twisted around in your seat to see who she was referring to.
Oh. Well, she definitely wasn't wrong, per se.
Coming in through the door himself was Kim Sunwoo, as well as a few of his own friends, you guessed. You recognized one of them as Ji Changmin, one of the dancers from the winter showcase. Besides those two, there were four others, too—three other boys and a girl. You didn't recognize any of them, but you saw the way your waitress greeted them and squeezed one of the boys' hands.
You and Sunwoo made eye contact, and you shot him a small smile, lifting your fingers in a wave.
He seemed surprised to see you, and you didn't fault him for that. His wave was slight and smile shy, but you couldn't figure out why he ducked his head and didn't come by and say hi.
They're being seated for dinner, Yn. It's okay. Chill a little.
You turned back in your seat to face Sieun and your food again.
"Hey, cheer up, girl." Sieun's smile was sympathetic as she caught your attention. You hadn't even noticed how your posture noticeably slumped after that interaction—if one could even call it that. "Don't let this ruin your dinner, okay?"
You sighed out of your nose, testing your chopsticks over the rim of your bowl. "You're right. I don't know, Eun. It feels like we regressed? Is he avoiding me? Am I overthinking this?"
"I'm not sure, hon," she told you. "It'll be okay, though. I promise. Are you ready for the check?"
You nodded, reaching for your napkin to wipe your mouth.
Sieun lifted her hand and caught your waitress's attention, then made a motion for the bill. HN!Yn was quick to bring it over and set the little black tray with the receipt onto the edge of your table. In her hands she held a small device to input your method of payment.
"Are we splitting the bill today, ladies?" She asked you, eyes flickering between you both.
"Yeah, evenly split would be great, please," you told her.
Sieun leaned over to peer at the receipt as you reached into your bag to grab your card. Her face contorted into confusion, and she ran her finger over a line as if reading over it again carefully. "Oh, uhm, excuse me. It says we get a discount—not that I'm complaining! But…"
HN!Yn smiled. "Ah, you're friends with Sunwoo, right? That's what he told me, at least. I always give my partner and his friends my Friends & Family discount, so don't worry about it. I appreciate your integrity though."
You and Sieun exchanged wide-eyed glances, blinking, then turned to peer over at where Sunwoo's friend group sat. One of the boys sitting next to him whacked his arm to get his attention, nodding toward your table.
Sunwoo looked up.
Your head tilted to the side and you mouthed a "thank you?" to him, unsure of why he went out of his way to help you out.
He only nodded before ducking his head again. Huh. You'd have to thank him properly later.
HN!Yn was quick to help you and Sieun box your meals and finish paying. Before long, you tucked your arm around Sieun's to push out into the cool evening—not without glancing back at Sunwoo's table first.
— ✶
"She looks sad. Why is she sad?" Sunwoo sulked, lying atop his folded arms on the table and staring at you through the space between Haknyeon and JC!Yn.
You were the last person he thought he'd see when he and his friends walked into Haknyeon's favorite Chinese restaurant. You and your friend were pretty much wrapping up dinner when they'd come in, and he was quite literally startled by your presence. He'd been walking around on eggshells, he felt, all because of this stupid situation he'd forced himself into.
It was stupid. Yeah… it was stupid.
Changmin delivered a light whack to the back of Sunwoo's head. "You're dumb."
Sunwoo sat up and cupped the back of his head, leveling a glare at his friend. "Hello?"
"He's not exactly wrong," said Chanhee from the other side of him as he texted someone on his phone.
Sunwoo pressed his lips together and looked across the table from him at JC!Yn in a silent cry for help. The woman could only lift her shoulders half-heartedly. That meant that she agreed with them… great.
Eric snapped his wooden chopsticks apart and began using either stick to smooth the other for splinters. "We're saying you're dumb because you're doing this to yourself and to her unnecessarily."
Sunwoo huffed. "That's because you guys weren't there to see it happen! They're totally together—or at least, close." It still felt awful to think about. It felt like there was a hole in his chest left empty after considering the possibility that he was too late. He didn't want to get hurt.
"You can still talk to her like you used to, Sunwoo-ah," Haknyeon chimed in. "Even if they were—and I'm not saying they are—together, there's still a healthy amount of space where you can dwell as her friend."
HN!Yn appeared at the head of the table with a tray of water, and everyone pitched in to pass the cups down. "Thanks, guys," she said, tucking the tray under her arm. "Are you guys ready to order?" The question was directed towards the rest of the table, but Sunwoo saw the way her eyes lingered on Haknyeon and how Haknyeon's smile shifted to something that Sunwoo was sure was only for her.
It made him feel strange again.
The group, as usual, trusted Haknyeon's choices in dishes and let him take the reins in deciding what they ate tonight. Once HN!Yn had headed off into the kitchen to deliver their order, conversation resumed swiftly.
"I think you're just scared, Sunwoo," JC!Yn said to him over the rim of her glass of water.
Murmurs of agreement resounded from all around the table. Sunwoo's jaw fell open. "I—I am not scared. What would I be scared of?"
"The truth! Oooh," Eric pursed his lips and wiggled his fingers in Sunwoo's direction.
Sunwoo promptly smacked Eric's hand away.
"If you weren't scared of the truth," said Haknyeon, as he propped his elbows onto the table, "you would have gone up to her in that hallway."
"Didn't she tell you that she didn't see Yangyang that way anyways?" Chanhee chimed in. He was still going at it texting whoever it was on his phone.
"But she also said she wanted to give it a second chance," Sunwoo corrected.
Changmin scratched behind his ear and grabbed sauce trays from the end of the table to pass down to everyone else. "That was before she started hanging out with you some more. What is your point?"
They all made excellent points, he thought. That afternoon he'd seen you and Yangyang, he'd gone to meet Changmin in one of the dance practice rooms. After that, he'd gone home to yell into his pillow until his throat burned. Eric had muttered something about Sunwoo being dramatic and summoned JC!Yn over to the apartment to deal with him.
Sunwoo had just been bummed. He didn't even know if bummed was a strong enough word.
"I'm just scared of getting hurt, I guess," he finally admitted, meekly.
The table quieted to allow him room to speak his mind, and even Chanhee put his phone away to give him his full attention now. It wasn't often Sunwoo wore his heart on his sleeve like this, and it wasn't easy either. For anyone. Admitting to his fears in the middle of a Chinese restaurant while five of one's friends listened in was intimidating, but it was comforting to know that these friends he kept would find a way to support him. Even if he was being stupid, their tough love was out of desire to look out for him.
When he was done, Changmin clasped a warm hand on his shoulder and his dimple pressed into his cheek. "Sunwoo-yah, I think that you second guess yourself too much and you know that. You're self aware enough to know that you make the mistake of not going for what or who you want."
Sunwoo stared at an impurity in the table. What Changmin was saying hit the nail on the head—it was what happened with the dance showcase, too, and now he was about to let it ruin a friendship he had with a person he cared very much about.
"My advice," Changmin continued, "is to talk to her about what you saw and clarify it. I know it's… I know it's scary thinking you're gonna get hurt again, but I think you'll feel a lot better afterward."
EPISODE TEN: SUPERSTAR, I'M NOT TOO FAR
your phone: hey thanks for the fnf discount last night! sorry i didn't thank u properly before, but yeah, really appreciate it :')
sunshine (sunwoo): it was no problem, dw abt it!
your phone: btw is everything okay? u seem a bit distant lately and i wanted to make sure u were doing alright
sunshine (sunwoo): ah yeah, im sorry :( there's just been some things on my mind
You shot Sunwoo a quick text back to let him know you were here if he wanted anyone to talk to. His text had just come in after you'd sent him a reply in the early evening.
"Yn-ah. Still on your phone, I see?"
You jolted and shoved your device into the pocket of your jeans, smiling sheepishly as Lee Jihoon power-walked into the backstage area with a pen behind his ear and a clipboard in hand. "Hi, Jihoon!" You squeaked.
He lifted his eyebrows at you, motioning for you to come follow him. Since everyone was back from Spring Break, the work for the play being performed was kicked into high gear. Jihoon was a graduate student at the university and a director of the stage here; adding the fact that he majored in the same thing you did also made him one of your favorite mentors ever. The back hallways were bustling with costumes, props and other assorted technicians while most of the actors were either in the main backstage area or onstage proper with the play director, HJ!Yn.
You followed swiftly after him and weaved through the people littered about the corridors. "I finished synching the panel back here with the projector in the box," you told him, "though, it's weird that it was ever undone in the first place." You frowned. There had been a lot of strange things happening in the theater lately.
Jihoon gave you a curt nod and set you up in front of one of the house lights panels located in the hallway leading right out to the audience. He pointed at it with the back of his pen. "Yeah, some funky shit's been happening around here," he sighed. "You were here the other night when the speakers were acting weird, right?"
You nodded and let him guide you through navigating this backup panel. "I was. You and Chan seemed really stressed."
"We were," he said, adjusting his cap. "We really do need some more funding to update our equipment—careful, that knob is really sensitive. Good, nice work."
Once you and Jihoon had successfully finished with this panel, you lingered in the hallway for a moment. Normally, you would switch back and forth between shadowing either Chan or Jihoon, and tonight was with the latter. He was going through a couple forms on his clipboard—he must have been reading through them while working tonight.
"You seem distracted tonight, Yn-ie," he said. "Is everything okay?"
Despite being one of the busiest and hardest workers here, Jihoon was also one of the most observant, still. You leaned against the wall next to him, toeing at the floor. "Boys are stupid, right?"
Without hesitation or looking up from his clipboard, he replied, "As a boy, I can confirm."
That made you sputter out a laugh, and you saw him glance up and flash you a smile. When you couldn't find something else to say, he went forth. "I don't know the whole situation, and you don't have to tell me anything. But we guys are a little—" he made a gesture with his hands and wrinkled his nose, "—blind. You probably know that already, but dudes are dumbasses, and sometimes when feelings get in the way, they want to run for the hills.
"But if you think he's worth it, then reach out and be forward with him. And if he cares about you, he'll reach out and be honest," he finished. He let you settle with that thought, let it marinate in your brain to give you something to think about. (As if you didn't have a lot to think about already.)
You pressed your lips together with a slow nod. "Thanks Jihoon."
"Anytime, Yn-ie." He nodded back toward the direction you both had come from. "Let's go back that way, yeah? We've got some more housekeeping to take care of."
— ✶
Sunwoo was in trouble.
"...I thought I'd recommend a song that's been on my mind. I've actually been listening to quite a few Taylor Swift songs recently, especially since she's re-recording all her albums! So here's 'Superstar' from Fearless, Taylor's Version."
He had put your most recent podcast episode on full volume while he made himself dinner. It had been a long day today, and so his automatic thought was to listen to you. But now that he was getting into the meat of the episode, he was quickly coming to realize how much trouble he was in. You were playing the song, and it was a direct call out to him to wake the fuck up.
As the song faded to a close, your voice came back on.
"Actually, I was recommended the song by someone I know," you said in the mellow tone you'd been in for the entire episode so far. "I guess I'm just confused and I was wondering if they really meant what they said."
Sunwoo nearly dropped the egg in his hand onto the kitchen floor. Guilt swirled around in the bubbles of the soup in the pot and he frowned down at the rich, creamy liquid.
He sighed, tapping the egg against the counter and cracking its innards into the pot. "Of course, I really meant it," he said as if you could hear him. He wished he had the guts to tell you everything that was going on in his head… As his soup boiled away, he leaned against the empty counter to wait, cradling his head in his hands, groaning. "You're being unfair, Sunwoo."
"...This one's from Peony! They say: almost didn't realize Rhaps Anon wasn't in the last episode until the very end when we hadn't gotten a rec from them. Hope they're doing okay!" Ah, so you weren't the only one who noticed his brief absence. Your sigh filled the apartment, though, he heard the way you tried to force some kind of cheeriness into it. "Yeah, I hope they're doing okay too. But Rhaps'll be back! Let's all wish them well. Fighting!—"
Oh, man. Now he felt even worse.
He really needed to talk to you. Oh god, he really needed to talk to you. If not to confess, then to clear the air and assure you that all was okay on his end. He was just being a coward, and he knew that well enough now.
When his dinner had finished, Sunwoo turned the flame off and headed for his phone on the opposite counter. He lowered the volume as he went in and pulled up his text thread with you.
sunwoo's phone: hey,, i know ur probs busy w the play this week, but is there a possibility for me to see you sometime soon? i wanted to talk to u abt something
He gnawed on his bottom lip as he awaited your answer, until he realized you were probably working. That made him drop his phone and return to his dinner—maybe he just needed to not look, so his anxiety wasn't so high—
His phone buzzed and he bolted back over.
superstar 💫: i think i'll prob have some time saturday morning
EPISODE ELEVEN: [SOMEONE'S LOOKING OUT FOR YOU, LOSERS.]
YOU asked Sunwoo if he'd like to tag along with you as you did some grocery shopping before rehearsal on Saturday morning. His answer had been automatic, and you both agreed to meet each other at the bus stop to ride down to the larger supermarket down the hill together. Even as you stood at the corner of your street waiting for him beneath the overhang, you were trying to come up with possible things he was going to say to you. You had figured, when he’d texted you Wednesday night, that perhaps the best way to go about this would be to make this casual. Hence, why you were forcing yourself to go grocery shopping a day earlier than you usually did.
Casual, in this case, called for “you don’t have stare me in the eyes the entire time,” and to be frank, you were a little too nervous for that kind of setting anyway.
You tugged the edges of your cardigan over you as you heard your name being called from the opposing street. Sunwoo was bounding his way over to you with his arm raised in greeting. You returned the gesture with a soft smile. “Hey.”
He stopped by you, shoving his hands into the pockets of his gray jacket. “Hi,” he said, licking his lips. “Thanks for agreeing to meet with me.”
The bus slowed to a halt in front of your stop, and the two of you retrieved your transportation cards to board. “You say that like I wouldn’t have agreed,” you chuckled and tapped your card, Sunwoo following suit.
The two of you managed to find a pair of empty seats near the second half of the vehicle where the exit was for an easy departure when you reached the foot of the hill. But for now, you tucked your bag onto your lap and settled into the window seat, while Sunwoo occupied the one next to you.
You turned your head to gaze out the window and watch the world blur by as you did. The Avenue streets were a tad narrower than most around the university, so the bus traveled as efficiently as it could from stop to stop before turning the block to make its descent. It was technically still morning, and though it was spring, the sky had decided to blanket the sunshine with gray clouds to form an atmosphere that reminded you distinctly of the past winter quarter. Except, instead of thin, empty branches, the streets and walkways were encased in darkening green leaves and falling pink petals, a nod to the short-lived cherry blossom season. From the corner of your eye, you saw Sunwoo’s foot start to tap against the ground like Thumper the Rabbit, and you wondered for the millionth time what was going on in that pretty head of his.
“I don’t really understand,” you found yourself saying—his head swiveled—and you turned to look at him, “did I do something wrong?”
Sunwoo stammered, "What? No, it wasn't you! It wasn't your fault at all—I was just—" he sighed, grimacing to himself. "I was just being stupid. And I know that sounds super vague, but the short answer is that I was being stupid and scared and insecure."
Your brows furrowed and you felt the bus come to a gentle stop at the foot of the hill. "Scared and insecure? What's going on; is everything okay?"
You both got up to make a quick exit off the bus and began making the short walk from the bus station into the outdoor shopping center.
There was a jittery bounce to Sunwoo's steps as well as a tension in his shoulders. "Last week," he began, "Jisung told me that he'd just left you at the practice room and that you were probably going to be there awhile."
You nodded, grabbing a basket at the front of the grocery store. That rang a bell for sure. It had been a very long day in the practice room, so you weren't quite sure what direction this was going in yet.
"Well, I wanted to go surprise you and come hang out with you. You know, like, to keep you company." He started scouring the opposite shelf to you in the dried foods aisle, his eyes nervously darting from the BUY ONE, GET ONE pasta noodles deal signs, to your person. "And when I got there, I saw you and Yangyang."
Me and Yangyang…? Oh, me and Yangyang.
It was like a lightbulb went off in your head, and you stopped pretending to look at the overpriced vermicelli noodles on the shelf behind you.
"And you guys were hugging and close and stuff—and by all means! I—I have no problem with that, of course," he added quickly, "I mean, you guys are really close… friends? And I just saw him lean toward you and left because I… I got the message." The latter portion was delivered in a defeated tone as he looked on toward you helplessly and sorrowfully. It was how Sieun described you Tuesday night when you'd seen Sunwoo at the restaurant: a sad sap.
You both stopped moving down the aisle to face each other. In the white, fluorescent supermarket lights, his hair hung in his eyes like his head in embarrassment. You were going to let him finish.
He cupped the back of his head, suddenly feeling so bare before you despite not being physically naked at all. "I thought some space might distinguish or extinguish my feelings for you," he continued, nose wrinkling and lip curling in a wince. "Clearly it didn't help, and I think overall, I realized I wasn't being fair to you—as a friend. And that I was also being the biggest fucking loser ever."
Wait, you were still reeling from the mentions about feelings—
Before you could even address the aforementioned, you had to make something clear first. You felt the corners of your lips lift. "Sunwoo, me and Yangyang really are just friends." At the confused, puppy-dog look in his eyes, you explained further, "That day, Yangyang came by and I made it clear to him that I just saw him as a friend. I felt really awful for feeling like I'd led him on and was going to lose his friendship."
Sunwoo's mouth opened, then closed, then opened again, and he struggled to come up with the response he wanted. "So… so when he was leaning in toward you…"
"He leaned in and flicked my nose, then almost gave me a nosebleed," you chuckled. You'd given him a very appropriate flick to the forehead after that.
His eyes widened at that. "Well shit. Are you okay?" He asked, and you saw his smile slowly begin to make its appearance, the sun peeking through an overcast sky.
"Yeah, perfectly fine," you dismissed with a flick of your hand. "Especially now. But yeah, we're just friends."
There was a surge of relief in his tense shoulders. "Oh, okay."
He trailed after you as you continued to make your way down this aisle in particular to pick up the things that were on your shopping list.
At one point, he coughed, handing you the jar of red peppers you were reaching for. "So no hard feelings, right? I promise it will be totally back to normal!"
"Normal, as in back to before?"
He nodded eagerly. "Yeah! To be honest, Dovey, I was just kind of scared that I had lost my chance after waiting so long. I don't know. And I realized that I was just scared to face that fact."
You gauged his reaction and your own heart thundered in your chest. "Scared to face the fact that you'd lost your chance with me?"
"Well, yeah. I—" He stopped and froze like a deer in headlights. And in any other circumstance, you would have been laughing, but he seemed so distraught by what he just admitted to that you tried hard to suppress your amusement. Tried. "I just said that aloud, huh."
Nodding, you grinned fondly. "You did."
He smiled, cute and flustered, cheeks tinted pink. "You're always too easy a person to talk to," he muttered.
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"I would've said something sooner…" He began.
Something jumped to attention in your brain. Oh no. "Was I giving you mixed signals?" You pursed your lips like you'd just gotten into something sour. "'Cause I swore I thought my attraction to you was clear. And, like, the thing where I totally began rethinking my thoughts about Yangyang when you came into the picture—"
"Wow, so Changmin was right?" Sunwoo made a face, holding his hand against his forehead. "That's crazy."
"Crazy good or…?"
He chuckled, and you couldn't help but admire the twinkle in his eyes as he did. "Crazy so good."
"I don't think people actually say that."
He whined, "Yah, you can't already be clowning me. Not when I just confessed that I like you."
That made you sober up, but you couldn't say the same for your heart rate. Man, your BPM alone could probably power a bullet train… "I like you, too. I hope that's clear."
There you two stood in the middle of the dried foods aisle with twin smiles glowing on your faces, soft and shared. You didn't know what the BOGO pasta was doing, but it was definitely adding to the atmosphere. You had intended for running errands to distract you from whatever Sunwoo had wanted to talk to you about, but clearly that was not the case—it would have never worked like that. You would be damned to have missed something like this. Not with him.
Perhaps he had made a mistake—he was now apologizing and clarifying and trying. You could hear Jihoon's words of wisdom ring loud and clear in your head. There was something perfectly fine about how this turned out.
"No more mixed signals?"
"No more mixed signals," he agreed.
— ✶
The remainder of your errand run with Sunwoo had gone smoothly, and soon, you were both seated side by side once more on the bus up to the University District. Sunwoo had gotten a couple things for his fridge, too, and so you both sat with your grocery bags by each other and your fingers grazing the other. Ever since you had clarified your position with Sunwoo a little over an hour ago, you had been feeling much lighter, your heart skipping for a different reason. You were back to feeling the giddy excitement you always had around him, and especially since you knew he saw you in exactly the same way.
The two of you shared a laugh as you stepped off the bus and onto your block, grocery bags in hand.
“—I’m being completely serious! Apparently I was just snot-nosed wailing into her shirt about being single and forever alone,” Sunwoo guffawed, grinning wide at you as you both stopped to the side of the walkway. “And Eric was pissed, oh my god.”
“I mean, you just kiss-blocked him; kind of understandable,” you mused.
Sunwoo sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Aye, I know. He’s a good guy though. Total loser, but a good loser. He made me hangover soup the next day.”
You let out a laugh, walking slowly with him down toward the entrance of your apartment complex. "That was sweet of him."
He snorted, "A little out of character, but yeah."
"You know," you piped up, "when I was applying and eventually interviewing for the position with Chan and Jihoon, I had no idea what either of them looked like. So I accidentally—woah, shi—"
Somebody coming down the sidewalk toward you crashed into your shoulder and sent you careening toward the sidewalk. Sunwoo swore as you let out a squeak—his arm looping around your waist and hauling you against him to steady you.
He lifted his head in the direction of the person with a glower on his face. "Hey! Dude, watch where you're going!"
"Thanks," you said sheepishly.
He turned to fix you with a smile, and you saw the moment he realized the position you were both in: you pressed firmly up against the side of his body, his arm wrapped around you, your faces so close to one another… He released his hold on you, neck burning as he cupped the back of it. "Heh, yeah. It's no problem. People should just really watch where they're going."
You coughed and nodded your head. "Yeah, for sure."
The pair of you were now in front of your apartment complex once more, reluctant to say goodbye. You wondered if he would ask to spend more time with you, but you had a feeling that he wouldn't want to intrude on your time any longer. It wasn't like he was intruding to you, but it was just a feeling you had about him. He wanted to respect your time.
And, well, you both had groceries to put away.
"So I'll uh, talk to you soon then?" You asked him, holding your grocery bags in front of you.
He peered at you through his lashes. "Definitely."
"This morning turned out way better than I thought it would, to be honest."
"Yeah no, same here," he echoed. "I'm just glad you actually gave me another chance."
You reached over and gave his shoulder a playful punch. "How could I not? I've always believed in you."
That seemed to ignite something inside of him. He jutted his bottom lip out and whined, "Oh my god, you can't just say that! You're so—wah."
You giggled, watching him squirm like he was being jolted by electricity. "Hey man, sometimes you've gotta be straightforward."
"Yeah, I know." He sobered slightly and took a step forward. Your heart clambered around in your chest and rattled your ribcage. There was this look in his eyes that made you glance at his lips—his perfect, plush, pink lips.
You held still, held your whole fucking breath, as he turned his head and kissed your cheek. It was feather-light, barely there, and yet, all the heat in your body seemed to rush to that single spot in a millisecond.
When he pulled away, his voice was soft. "How's that for straightforward?"
EPISODE TWELVE: ONE LOVE SONG CAN'T CONVEY HOW I FEEL FOR YOU, SO HERE'S TWENTY—
SUNWOO imagined that he looked as cartoonish as any man in love could. There had to be hearts in eyes, hearts around his head, hearts on a glittery pink trail that carried him everywhere he went. He giggled to himself as he fished his house keys from his pocket and unlocked the front door to let himself in.
"Oh my god. We've properly lost him."
With a loud, war-like AHHH!, Sunwoo yelped and nearly dropped his groceries, struggling to hold the bags to his chest as he pressed himself against the back of the front door. His apartment filled with high-pitched cackles of delight.
Though his heart was going through about a million cartwheels a second, he managed to force the fear from his eyes as embarrassment flooded his system. He flared his nostrils, frowning and tipping his head against the door. "I hate you guys!"
"You should hate Eric for giving JC!Yn your apartment key," Changmin wheezed, slapping his hands together and rolling around on the living room carpet as he pointed and laughed at Sunwoo's absolute misery. "You should've seen your face!"
Chanhee was on the couch with his legs curled up into his chest as he had his phone out, recording the entire thing. "This one's going in the drunk Sunwoo folder."
"Yah, I'm not even drunk!"
Chanhee shrugged. "It's become your general meme folder now. We should probably rename it."
Sunwoo whipped his head toward JC!Yn, who was seated on the opposite end of the couch with an amused smile on her face. "Noona! Are you just gonna let them bully me like this?"
Her smile widened. "Sorry, Sunwoo, but we didn't think you would miss us completely when you came in."
He let out a loud groan, fragging himself over to the kitchen so he could set the grocery bags on the counter and begin to unload them. "What're you guys doing here anyways? Isn't it Saturday morning? Where's Kei?" He asked, unloading a carton of juice from the bag and slotting it into the fridge.
Kei was JC!Yn's roommate, and the two girls always went on a grocery shopping date every Saturday morning with Changmin and Chanhee. They often made Changmin drive since he had the biggest car, and grocery shopping was an exclusive event that only the four of them were allowed to partake in. Eric, Sunwoo, and even Jacob had expressed distaste at that elitism. One of these days, they were bound to let someone else join… right?
But regardless, that always meant that Saturday mornings were occupied for them. So why were three-quarters of the group currently invading Sunwoo's apartment?
Changmin sat up from his place on the floor and fixed Sunwoo with a grin that made him nervous. "We dropped her off at their place, and we did go shopping this morning, but you'll never guess the curious thing we witnessed while we were there." His giggles sent a doom-like shiver down Sunwoo's spine.
Then it clicked.
Sunwoo abruptly stopped taking dried noodle packages out of the grocery bag. "You're kidding."
A snort from Chanhee. "Oh, you wish."
Sunwoo bashed his head against his sweater-covered palms. "No."
"Yes!" Changmin shrieked.
"I didn't know you guys went to that supermarket!" Sunwoo wailed, throwing his head back toward the ceiling. "You guys saw us?"
JC!Yn rested her chin against her arm as she leaned over the back of the couch to face him. "We heard you, too. I'm glad you decided to own up to your chicken-ness. See? Wasn't so scary after all."
Well, he couldn't exactly agree with that. But he also couldn't disagree with it. He'd been so scared he was about to lose your friendship then for being so insecure for no reason. A simple clarifying question could have saved the both of you so much strife. But the conversation also reaped rewards: your mutual confessions.
He sulked and didn't say anything.
"It was cute though, Sunwoo-ah," said Chanhee with a teasing lilt to his smile.
"And also," Changmin cut in, "what do you mean 'so Changmin was right? That's crazy?!'"
Sunwoo snorted. "Now that, I have nothing to say to."
"So what's the deal now?" JC!Yn asked. "Are you two dating now or…?"
Oh. Another long pause, then— "Oh my god, you didn't ask her out?"
"Hey! Listen!" Sunwoo yelled in an attempt to defend himself.
"We're listening." Chanhee folded his arms over his chest with a less than impressed look on his face. He scoffed. "I can't believe you pull."
"Shut up!"
"He hasn't even asked her out yet—how can he pull?" Changmin quipped back with frenzied gesticulations.
Sunwoo groaned as he flopped over the counter. He couldn't believe he was having such a good morning, and now he was being berated once more for his stupidity. How could he not ask you out? It was right there! The opportunity had presented itself a multitude of times, and yet, why was he still here, dateless?
Then there came the thought of how to go about this. There was a part of him who thought that just asking you was probably fine. But the other part remembered how much he liked you—so texting was simply not an option. It had to have some pizzazz, a bit of oomph, to it.
"We can see the gears turning in your head, Sunwoo," said JC!Yn. "What's on your mind, bub?"
Sunwoo looked up from where he had smattered himself onto the kitchen counter like a pancake. "I have no rizz."
Chanhee coughed. "Well, that's not news."
Sunwoo sent him a scowl. "How should I ask her out? I kind of want it to be special, you know?"
"Hmm." JC!Yn pursed her lips, tapping her chin in thought. "The other day, I was talking to Sangyeon about music or something or other, and he showed me the playlist he'd made his girlfriend—"
"His fake girlfriend," Changmin corrected with a little smirk.
She rolled his eyes. "I'm pretty sure Lee Sangyeon is not sad enough to make fake playlists for his fake girlfriend." It was a known inside joke amongst the friend group that Sangyeon had a "secret girlfriend" stashed away somewhere. A few of them liked to joke that she either didn't actually exist or that he kept her locked in his laundry machine or something. Mostly, though, they just wanted to know if he actually was single or not. What was the point of keeping her a secret anyway?
The slight change in victim brought Sunwoo's mood up. "What about the playlist, noona?"
She blinked, turning her attention back to her original train of thought. "Oh, right. What if you made her one of those cute, romantic playlists?"
The four of them exchanged glances with one another. It was a silent form of communication, one that had one uniform thought running through the wire.
— ✶
You'd received a text from Sunwoo about thirty minutes ago asking if he could stop by your apartment to drop off something of yours. Apparently, in the madness of the checkout aisle at the grocery store, he had accidentally "stolen" one of your cans of chicken noodle soup.
You hadn't bought chicken noodle soup though.
This was why you now anxiously awaited his arrival for the real reason he wanted to stop by. You had literally just seen him about an hour or two ago, but you'd be lying if you said you were happy at the prospect of seeing him again so soon. Your cheek still seared from his kiss.
As if he could read your thoughts, you heard a loud series of knocks at the door.
"Coming!" You called, hustling over from your living space area and over to the door.
After peeking through the peephole, you definitely saw Sunwoo, but what he was holding was nowhere near the likeness of a can of chicken noodle soup.
In a hurry, you ripped the door open, lips parted at the bundle of bright colored blooms in his hands. Sunflowers and carnations and lilies and roses—
He peered out sheepishly from behind the bouquet with his other hand occupied by his open phone. "Hi," he peeped.
"Hey," you exhaled, a grin fighting its way onto your face.
"If I made you a playlist, would you go out with me?"
You blinked, heartbeat rocketing into high gear. "Sunwoo," you started with a disbelieving laugh, "you don't have to—"
His thumb lowered onto a button on his phone. "Whoopsies, already did it."
Right on cue, you heard your phone buzz from your pocket. Curious, you withdrew it and opened the text message from him with a link to a Spotify playlist entitled: "One love song can't convey how I feel for you, so here's twenty."
You could have melted into a puddle of ooey-gooey goodness. "Sunwoo," you lamented, smiling way too wide now.
He beamed back at you. "What do you say?"
You shook your head, throwing your arms around him as he laughed and hugged you back. "You're so cute. Yes, I'll go out with you."
He gave you a little, warm squeeze. "Oh, thank god. I thought I was gonna die from anticipation."
You laughed and smiled into his shoulder. When you pulled away, your hand gently reached for the side of his face. "What if I kissed you right now?"
His eyes widened a smidge. "What if you wha--"
You cut him off and pressed your lips to his briefly, then pulled back.
"Wait, wait. Come back here," he murmured, chasing after you and crushing his mouth against yours. And it was perfect. Everything was perfect. The feel of his lips, the smell of his cologne, the firmness of his shoulders beneath your grip and the perfect pressure as you both sealed the deal with a kiss.
The two of you pulled away at the same time with labored breaths, foreheads meshed together as you caught your breath.
"You're not gonna turn this into a podcast episode, are you?" He asked, voice low and raspy, yet laced in a playful tonic.
You teased him right back. "As long as it doesn't end poorly."
He chuckled, and you could feel the vibrations of his laugh against your lips. "Then I guess I'll just have to make it the best date ever."
"Don't worry," you said with a cheeky hand on his chest, "I believe in you."
With a laugh, he grazed his lips over yours again. "Thanks, superstar."
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a/n: hihi!! thanks so much for reading <3 if you enjoyed, i would deeply appreciate a comment, reblog, or an ask to tell me what u thought about it! much love, onto kevin's !!
permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @sodafy @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @hibernatinghamster @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @kflixnet
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unreliablesnake · 1 year
Text
Dirty little secrets (Simon "Ghost" Riley x reader)
Summary: Ghost finds out you are fuck buddies with Graves, and now he wants a piece of you too.
Note: Mare is the code name of the reader.
Warnings: None, which is surprising considering the amount of smut I wrote lately. Afab!reader.
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Graves pulled you into a big hug when you met again. By then you were a member of the 141, but he always said, "once a Shadow, always a Shadow." You had worked for him for about four years, by the end as the lead interrogator. Shadows had their own rules, being brutal was something Shadow Company usually appreciated. And you could be brutal when needed.
"Are they treating you right? You know you can come back to us anytime," he said with a smirk, his hands moving down to your lower back.
With a polite smile you pried him off of you, stepping back to build some distance. "Everything's great," you replied shortly.
He tilted his head to the side as he examined your face, probably trying to find out why you were so cold all of a sudden. You couldn't blame him, but you couldn't let the others know that back in the day the two of you were fuck buddies. You loved his arrogance and sense of humor, and his boyish charm was the cherry on top.
Soap appeared before Graves could say anything, greeting him like an old friend. The two engaged in a conversation, while behind you Ghost began to move around, his size making it impossible for him to stay undetected in this situation.
"Mare, come on, we have things to do," he told you as he passed by.
You nodded and followed him, out of the corner of your eye noticing how Graves wanted to object when he saw you leave. Once you were out of earshot, you turned to the lieutenant. "What exactly do we have to do?"
He let out a questioning hum, but immediately realized what you were asking him. "Oh, nothing. I just saw how uncomfortable you were when Graves became all touchy during that hug. Thought you might want to be away from him," he explained. "Is he like this with every female employee?"
"No," you replied immediately, maybe sounding a little offended by the idea.
"Just asking. I guess there's a story then." Letting out a long sigh, you nodded. Ghost looked down at you, studying your face with an intrigued expression. "You were together?" You remained silent and his eyes grew a little wider. "You're still together?"
For a moment you wondered how much you should tell him, after all you've been trying to keep it a secret from them. But strangely enough, he made you feel safe, probably because this man seemed to be good at keeping secrets. "We're not. We're just… friends with benefits," you admitted.
"He looks like the type of guy who's into that, but I didn't think you would like it," he noted as you walked into the hangar.
"We're having fun without the commitment of a relationship."
He watched as you hopped on a table, eyes glued to you the whole time. You could tell he was still thinking about the idea of you and Graves occasionally having sex, probably judging you for being this open-minded. But you didn't mind. He could think whatever he wanted.
"And how does it work now that you don't work together?" he suddenly asked, his arms now folded over his chest.
With a smile, you replied, "A few weeks ago he got on his plane and flew over to visit me."
"He took his private jet for a trip to have sex with you?" When you nodded, he whistled. "If I needed it that badly I'd just go to the nearest pub and pick up some bimbo," he said.
"You're into bimbos?"
Ghost shrugged. "They're easier to impress. Much less effort than impressing girls like you."
"Was it a compliment?" you asked with a playful smile.
"Maybe."
He was watching you, eyes intense and dark as he thought about something. You knew that while he was silent, his mind was probably insanely loud at the moment. "What?" you spoke up, getting bored of his silence.
"Nothing," he brushed you off.
"Come on, Ghost, I can see the wheels turning in your head."
Taking a deep breath, he clearly considered answering your question. Then he nodded, letting you know he was ready to give you a glimpse into his mind. "Why did you leave Shadow Company if you were having fun with Graves?"
"Price said some things that made me come here."
"Like what?"
You smiled and let out a small laugh. "I know you recommended me," you informed him.
Ghost gulped, but he quickly recovered and soon stepped between your legs, using his knee to push them wider apart so he could fit in there. You nervously looked around to see how many people were staring at you, but there was no one near. He put his hands on your knees, gently stroking your skin through your pants to get your attention.
"Why did you recommend me? Something tells me there was a personal reason," you told him, hoping he would finally say something.
"I think I saw you and Graves once." With a frown, you let out a questioning hum. "We were working together on something and I needed you for an interrogation. Someone told me you went to get something from the plane, and sure enough, you were there," he began before leaning really close to you so his deep voice dropped to a whisper, "being eaten out by someone."
That smug bastard was smiling, you could see that in his eyes. But you couldn't be mad when you were embarrassed, wishing you could crawl into a hole and die. "I don't even want to know what you think about me after that," you said.
But Ghost only tilted his head to the side as he studied your face. Your skin was burning under his gaze so you looked away, but he grabbed your jaw and made you look at him forcefully. "I've been thinking about what it would feel like to be the reason why you make those sounds," he finally told you.
You felt the heat building up in your core, every cell now yearning for more; his touch, his kiss, any kind of physical contact, really. Ever since you had joined the 141, you'd been on good terms with Ghost, the two of you often drinking together at night, and he even told you some personal details. You knew he had nightmares. You knew he had a traumatic childhood. You knew--
"Mare, are you in here?"
Graves. Fuck. You instinctively pushed Ghost away, who only moved because your actions took him by surprise. "Damn it," you muttered as you jumped off the table and gave him an almost worried look. "Nothing happened," you told him before walking away.
You met the commander halfway, flashing a nervous smile at him the moment you stopped in front of him. "Is everything okay?" he asked, putting a hand on your flushed cheek.
No. Nothing was okay. You wanted to find out what Ghost really wanted from you. Was it just sex? Did he get the courage to act on his dirty fantasies because he knew you were fuck buddies with Graves? There were too many questions for your liking.
"I'm good," you managed to say in the end. "Let's talk somewhere else. Do you have booze?" you asked with a laugh.
As you walked away, you turned back for a short moment, not missing the way Ghost stood there with his hands stuffed into his pockets, watching you leave without saying a word.
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gejo333 · 4 months
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Unexpected Match VII
DILF/DBF Miguel O’Hara x Female Reader
Pt. 1 Pt.8
18+ Warning!!
Summary: You and the O’Hara’s go away on a small family vacation upstate.
We’re back!!!
Happy to have another chapter out! Next one is going to have a lot of drama! I apologize for any grammar mistakes, I haven’t fully looked this over yet. But I hope you enjoy!
Wc: 5.2k
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The fall crisp air was becoming a winter chill as you gaze at the golden leaves falling from the trees. You turn your head towards the left as you smile softly at the curly brunette man. Miguel's phone buzzed, a photo of you carrying Gabi as you both smiled at the camera from one of the many days you had gone to the park. A small smile crept on to your face as you hadn't noticed he changed his Home Screen from the photo he's kept of baby Gabi on his phone since you first met him.
You turned your head and smiled at the adorable sight of a sleeping Gabi, as her head rested against her car seat. Suddenly, the thought of another car seat next to Gabi crossed your mind. Sudden realization of your thoughts made your cheeks red. You smiled as giving a few siblings for Gabi after your career is steady would be nice.
Miguel drove the car into the entrance of the family campsite. Two weeks ago Gabi had brought up that every year they leave the city to do a weekend camping trip at a family camp, where Gabi explained that there's a bunch of fun activities to do at the kid center. You were really happy when both Miguel and Gabi wanted you to come with them. You knew you lived with them for a few months now and felt like a family, the impending conversation with your parents has created some stupid insecurities to pop in your mind. But every time the thoughts pop up your happily reminded of Gabi's joyous laughter and Miguel's loving words, that you wouldn't change anything for this in the world.
"We're here." Miguel parked the car as you both got out. You went around the car and opened it up to Gabi's side. You unbuckled her from her car seat.
"Hey, baby bug. It's time to wake up. We're here." You said softly as you gently brushed some of the hair sticking out of her pony tail behind her ear. Your heart melted at the sight of her yawning and rubbing her eyes of any sleep before you saw her bright brown eyes. You helped her out of her seat as she was still trying to wake up. As soon as she got a look of her surroundings she perked up instantly.
"Yay! We're here!" Gabi ran on to the grass next to the parking lot.
"Please stay close Gabi, while your papa and I unload the car." You say smiling at her happy attitude as you watch her play around in the grass.
"Will do!" She said looking at you with one of the iconic O'Hara smiles.
You heart almost stopped as an arm wrapped around your waist and whisked you behind the car to the open trunk before being slightly dipped and kissed. You happily returned the kiss as your arms wrap around his neck to deepen it. The kiss ended with another quick kiss or two, as he stood you up straight but still wrapped in each others arms.
"Loved that. But what was it for?" You chuckle as you brush strands of his hair back in his iconic hair style.
"I'm just really happy. Ever since I saw you again, I just never felt this happy before. Of course I was really happy when it was just Gabi and I, but I just feel complete now that I have the two most important girls in my life."
"I've never been more happy being with you and Gabi. The perfect small family bubble." You press one more kiss to his lips before you untangle from each other and begin to unpack.
"Maybe our family bubble can grow bigger one day." Said Miguel as he took a cooler and set in on the ground. Your eyes widen from his comment.
"Doesn't sound like a bad idea. But maybe after putting a ring on this finger." You chuckle as you tease him.
"Sounds like a good idea. I'll keep it in mind."
"Wait...are you saying you might propose one day?" You paused when you heard his response.
"Yes." He smiled as he took something else from the trunk out. Your heart briefly stopped from his response. You smiled as you went on your toes to kiss his cheek.
"Sounds like a good idea." You say as you grab the last thing from the trunk and set it down before Miguel closes it and locks the car.
"Princesa, we're heading to the cabin." Said Miguel as he picked up majority of the things with out breaking a sweat as you helped carry the last two bags.
"Okay!" Gabi ran over to you both as she skipped slightly ahead, stopping and turning to make sure you and Miguel were still following her.
A few minutes later you made it to the cabin.
You were stunned when you saw it. It wasn't just a simple cabin, but a large two floor cabin with a double door entrance. You realized this family camping site wasn't your run of the mill place. It must have cost a lot to stay here.
When Miguel opened the door and the three of you entered you were even more amazed by the interior design. It was as if the wood cabin was made for the heavens.
"Papa! Can we go to the kid center?" Gabi said from the stairs.
"I'm sorry princesa. We arrived pretty late. Everyone's probably back with their families having dinner. But I promise we'll take you first thing tomorrow." Miguel said as he set down everything in the entryway next to the things you brought in.
"Ok, papa." You saw the disappointment in her eyes despite her trying to hide it, which stung you heart.
"Hey Gabi. Have you ever made a fairy house before?" You say as you begin to unpack things like Miguel and put them in the right places.
"No, what's that." Gabi's interest peaked from your words, districting her from her sadness.
"Well, when I was little and use to go camping, my grandmother told me that fairies lived in the forests all around and that not all of them have homes. So with my brothers and grandmother we would find sticks, leaves, and acorn caps and build tiny houses for the fairies to live in."
"Really! Can we build one?" Gabi's eyes sparkled from your small story as she ran towards you from the stairs.
"Of course! We can build one right outside the cabin. But let's help finish unpacking with Papa and then we can build it."
Miguel smiled as he watched you and Gabi from the window building a tiny fairy house on the side of the giant tree a few feet from the cabin. His heart swelled every time you glanced over and smiled at him. Everytime he saw you it felt like he was falling for you all over again.
20 minutes later Gabi ran back into the cabin calling for Miguel to come outside to see the fairy house. "Alright mija, I'm coming." Miguel chuckled as he was led outside by his overly excited daughter. Stoping right in front Gabi, crouched on her knees as you stood up and Miguel wrapped an arm around your waist pulling you to his side as he kiss the top of you head.
"Look what me and Y/n built! This is where the fairies can get their mail from their friends. Look! Y/n made a roof that can be removed, so we can check on the fairies. here is the bedroom. There are two beds so that the fairy can have a sleep over with her friends. This is the dinning room where they eat. And here is a tiny toilet too!" Gabi giggled from her last sentence which melted both of your hearts. "How will we know they came?" Added Gabi as she looked up at you.
"When you see fairy dust scattered around the house, that means they were here."You words made Gabi's eyes light up as she got up and gave you and Miguel a hug together. With ease Miguel picked up Gabi with on arm as he directed you both back into the cabin for dinner.
After dinner and more chatter about the fairies, a yawning Gabi indicated that it was time to go to bed. Miguel picked her up as you turned off all the lights downstairs before all three of you made it up stairs where you entered the first bedroom. Already in her pjs you and Miguel tucked her into bed before saying good night. "Y/n?"
"Yes my baby bug?"
"Can we check the fairy house tomorrow morning?"
"Of course we can. Good night sweetheart. Have sweet dreams." You and Miguel both leave, closing her door before heading down the hall and around the corner to the master bedroom.
As you entered the room you gasped when you felt arms lift you up in a bridal position as Miguel carried you to the bed, laying you down on it.
"Miguel we have to get out of our clothes." You giggle as he wouldn't let you out of his hold. You turn to face him, already meet his gaze on you.
"Te amo, hermosa." Miguel brushed some strands of your hair behind your ear before leaning down to capture your lips, which you melted into. The kiss continued into a loving make out session. Lips on lips or on skin.
In a slight daze you somehow straddled his lap as you continue the semi-heated session. You give him on last kiss on the lips before siting up, still on top of him. You felt a starting erection poke your thigh as you straddle, his hand on your waist as he lightly moved your hips on him.
A mischievous thought popped up in your head. You were curious how much and how long you could tease him before you got in trouble. Last time you made him sexually frustrated you didn't get a wink of sleep all night and sore the for the rest of the week.
You moved your hips a little bit more, earning a small groan from his lips as you felt his erection grow, making you slip out a small moan. You continue like this for a little more before you unstraddle him and get off the bed.
"Cariño, come back here." Miguel huffed as he gave you a light glare for getting off him in the middle.
"Mhmm nope." You try to hid your smile as you begin to undress.
"Y/n, I'm warning you. Come back over here." Miguel's gaze scanned up  your body as you were only left in a matching pair of white lace underwear.
"Please, mi amor." You smiled when you saw his slight bothered state as you turned around to walk into the master bathroom to remove your makeup. Even before you could get your makeup remover you heard footsteps came your way before you could turn around you were thrown over Miguel's bare shoulder "Miguel." You chuckled as he carried you back to the bed where he gently threw you on on to your stomach. Miguel got behind you, before leaning over to whisper in to your ear.
"You know better than to test me, hermosa."
You wake up the next morning, feeling sore between your legs. You sit up, still groggy as you look outside the window to the beautiful view. You feel arms wrap tighter around your waist. Turning to look the the man next to you, you smile down at him as he places kisses up your side to your neck as he sat up next to you.
"Good morning."
"Good morning, mi amor. How did you sleep?" He smirked as you gave him an slightly annoyed look, before wiping it away with a kiss to your lips.
"I slept well. Luckily you were tired from driving up here. Or I think I wouldn't be able to walk today."
"Well, I would have gone easier if you didn't tease me like that." Miguel moved your legs to lay over his lap, lifting you to sit on his lap as he
leaned back on the bed frame. You wrapped your arms around his neck as you placed a kiss on his lips again. "I was thinking, after dropping Gabi off at the kid center that we go on a hike." Miguel said.
"Sounds perfect."
"Good. Make sure to wear a bathing suit."
"Ooo, ok. I can't wait." After relaxing in comfortable silence, being in each others arms more than enough you both take a shower, Miguel needing to carrying you as your legs were too sore to walk.
After getting dressed you both go downstairs where you both made breakfast together you noticed that little O'Hara was still upstairs asleep. Miguel went up to go wake her up and a couple minutes later he carried her down the stairs towards the kitchen.
"Good morning baby bug. How did you sleep?" You say as you place a kiss to the top of her head and placing a plate of scrambled eggs, sausage, and fruit in front of her.
"Good! Can we check the fairy house?" Pleaded Gabi.
"How about you eat your breakfast and then we can go check." Said Miguel as he passed you a cup of coffee, which you happily took.
"Ok!" Gabi began to eat her food fast.
"Gabi, don't rush eating. You can choke. Please eat slower." You worried.
"But what if the fairies are gone by the time I'm done?"
"Fairies wake up super early to go to work, so we won't see them sadly. But, I'm very sure they were there." You added.
After Gabi properly ate her food you helped her put on her shoes before the three of you walked outside into the fresh morning air. Gabi ran to the fairy house and took off the roof, a gasp leaving her before she jumped up and down with a wide smile on her face.
"They were here! They were here! Look! There's fairy dust! And the bed was used. And look! They left some food on the table!" Gabi pointed out with a big smile on her face.
"Wow, that's so cool." Miguel brought you close and kissed the side of your head, before whispering a thank you.
"Alright Princesa. Let's gets you ready so we can take you to the kid center." Said Miguel, which Gabi happily ran back into the house.
You helped put on Gabi's shoes as the two of you waited for Miguel. However, he came down the stairs on the phone, and annoyed look on his face. You give him a worried look for seeing him stressed. He walked over to you saying, "Peter, you know that I'm with my family upstate. What's happening?" His brows furrowed as he pinched the bridge of his nose with his hand, clearly frustrated by whatever was being said to him. You placed your hand in his empty one, giving him a gently squeeze to get his attention.
"One moment Peter. Are you ok, hermosa?" His looked quickly became soft and loving when his attention was on you.
"Gabi's getting a bit impatient to go to the kid center. I was offering to walk her over and get her settled there." You smile up at him.
"That would be great, thank you." Miguel placed a quick kiss to your lips and then a kiss to the top of Gabi's head before he went back on the call.
You and Gabi walked out of the Cabin, and following the signs walking over to the kid center.
"Y/n? Why isn't Papa coming with us?"
"He had to take an quick emergency call with work."
"Oh. That happens sometimes. Papa sometimes can't stop work from taking up all his time. But ever since you moved in he's been a lot better, which makes me really happy because I get to spend even more time with Papa." Gabi smiled up at you as she continued to hold your hand, walking to the kid center.
"That makes me happy that I was able to help."
"Papa loves you a lot. Like a lot. But I win, cause I love you most!"
"I love you the most too Gabi." You stop as you kneel down and pull her into a hug, which she happily accepts.
A few minutes passed by and you and Gabi made it to the kid center. As you entered the building you walked up to the front where a camp counselor of sorts greeted you with a warm smile.
"Good morning! Welcome to the kid center. Are you here to go on super cool adventures?" The camp counselor said as she looked at Gabi.
"Yeah!" Gabi smiled.
"Perfect! And what's your first and last name?"
"Gabi O'Hara."
"Welcome Ms. O'Hara. Let me talk to your mom and have her fill out a few forms for you and then you can join the rest of the kids." Your eyes widen slightly when you were mentioned as Gabi's mom. You didn't want to correct the women as Gabi didn't seem bothered by the mistake. And in  truth, you were bothered by it either. You did love Gabi as your daughter, even though you knew you aren't her biological mother. You hoped maybe she saw you at a mother figure.
After reading over the permission slip forms and signing them you handed them back to the woman.
"Perfect. Ok, Gabi, you can follow me."
You kneel down as Gabi gives you a hug.
"Papa and I will pick you up in a few hours. Have fun." You give her one last hug before she waves goodbye and walks with the camp counselor to the main area.
As you walked back towards the Cabin you felt like something was off. You felt the hair on your neck stand up. As if someone was watching you. Just to satisfy your nerves your turn back to see no one. You shrug if off, obviously you needed more coffee. You picked up the pace as the feeling wouldn't go away, as you sped walked all the way back to the Cabin, where you quickly unlocked the door and closed it behind you before locking it again. You look out the window to see a woman walk by. You didn't recall her walking behind you. Maybe it was just a coincidence. Your stomach dropped when you felt arms wrap around you, making you jump.
"Lo siento, cariño. I didn't mean to scare you. Y/n? Is everything ok?" Miguel asked, concern etched in his voice as he gave you a worried look.
"I'm fine. I just felt a bit off on my walk back. For some reason I thought someone was following me on my way back. But I think it was just my mind playing tricks on me." Your words didn't reassure your boyfriend as he opened the door to scan the area. He closed the door as he kept you in his arms to help calm your nerves.
"Would you like to stay in the cabin? We can watch a movie in the bedroom or living room."
Miguel offered.
"no, let's go on our hike. It'll be nice to enjoy nature. Plus, my big strong boyfriend can help protect me." You dramatically bat your eyelashes as you wrap your arms around one of his biceps, to which he chuckled as he took your chin and kissed you. "I'll make sure to protect you, mi amor."
You both changed into clothes to go on a nice walk as you both walked outside and begin your walk. You took Miguel's hand in yours to which he smiled leaned down and kissed you lovingly before you started your walk.
Ten minutes into the hike, was comfortable silence until Miguel decided to speak. "I've taken this hike once before. And I found something, which will be a surprise until we get there." Miguel grinned as he saw the pout on your face before you replaced it with a smile. "Well I can't wait to see what it is."
"I think I'm going to tell my parents at the Christmas party." You add which Miguel gave you a soft and warm smile. "I'll be there for you. Let's hope they take it well."
"I'm hoping so. But since it's a week away, I know it might be a lot, but I think we should have a plan in case it goes south."
"Like what?" Miguel's breath held waiting to your your words.
"Well, if they don't take it well they'll probably get upset and say things they'll regret. Maybe you take Gabi back home. I don't her having to experience anything bad, especially around Christmas."
"Y/n, I really want to be right with you. It's about us. I'm not going to leave you if it goes south." Miguel gives you a serious look, you sigh knowing he wouldn't let you do it by your self.
"I don't want Gabi to witness anything bad."
"And she won't. If it goes south we'll just leave. And to not be bothered, we'll spend Christmas in the city."
"The city? Where?"
"At my apartment. The one Gabi and I moved from to here. We left almost everything besides essentials. I'll have a Christmas tree delivered and set up."
"Well, that sounds like a plan. I hope it goes well. But honestly, I don't care what they think. I'll just be relieved to finally be able to show my love for you anywhere." You stopped, Miguel following right after as he smiled and brought you close to him as you both looked at each other in perfect silence.
"I can't wait to tell the world how much I love you."
You walk hand in hand in a comfortable silence, only talking when either of you point out something beautiful or interesting. Enjoying the walk, you didn't realize how far you walked until Miguel stopped.
"Close your eyes. Your surprise awaits." Miguel grinned. You smiled as you closed your eyes, before Miguel placed an arm around your waist and pulled you close so you he could guide you. After a minute you heard the thunderous sound of rushing water. Miguel stopped as leaned down lips against your ear as he said, "you can open your eyes now."
When you open your eyes, they widened, amazed by the gorgeous waterfall and swimming hole. The water was a beautiful crystal blue, something you though you would never see so up north.
"It's so beautiful. Thank you for showing this place to me." You turn to face Miguel as you give him a hug and kiss to the lips, thanking him for the surprise.
"I'm glad you love it, hermosa. Would you like to take a swim?" Miguel grinned after he saw you nod and smile.
"One little problem though."
"And what's that?"
"I forgot to wear a bikini. Guess I only have my birthday suit to wear." You giggle as you see lust cloud Miguel's eyes. You step away from him as you begin to shed your clothing. Only left in your panties you slipped them off before tossing them into the pile. You then walk into the water, relieved that it was warm, going in until your chest deep. You turn to face Miguel who was still on the shoreline, now removing his boxers, as his erect cock bounced out, relieved to be free from its restraints.
He walks into the water before making it right in front of you. You knew there was a stark height difference between you both, but standing at the same level of water, where your chest deep and his was still above made you even more self aware of it. Holding your waist and pulling you against him you feel his erection against your stomach, making your cheeks slightly red. Miguel leans down capturing your lips wis his. Not long were the kisses becoming more intense, as he moved his lips from you chin to your neck where he found that sweet spot. A moan escapes your lips as Miguel's hand move from your waist down to your thighs, lifting you up and wrapping your legs around his waist and arms around his neck for stability. A moan by you and a groan from Miguel came when he sunk you down onto his cock. Although you were plenty wet from the water, the lack of prep made you tighten around him, earning another groan from him.
"Hermosa, you have to loosen up a bit or I won't last much longer."
You moaned out loud as you tried to adjust to his size. As soon as he felt you were relaxed, he began to ram his hips up into you, You were in slight pain, but it didn't bother you as you were overcome with pleasure. As one of his hands held your hips in place, the other began to play with one of your breasts as he used his fingers to play with your nipple, making you gasp.
You lower your hand to your clit to help relieve some of your arousal. However, as soon as your fingers touched your sensitive area, Miguel snatched your wrist and moved it to your side as you groaned in frustration.
"Miguel." You whine as you lay your head back against his shoulder.
"Sorry, cariño. Not going happen yet. You just have to sit here and take my cock in this pretty little pussy of yours." Miguel whispered in your ear before kissing and marking up along your neck.
Your lips connect into a heated kiss. The water splashes around from the movement of both your bodies.
"This take me back to the time we first met. In that private pool back in Miami."
"At least now I know your mine and that this won't end tomorrow." Miguel said as he smiled against your lips before kissing you again.
"Please touch me Miggy."
"What was that hermosa?" Miguel chuckled as your rolled your eyes.
"Please Miguel."
" As you wish." Miguel lowered his hand as he began to rub your clit. A moan escapes you as you arch your chest against his.
"Cum for me." He whispered as your eyes rolled back from the overwhelming pleasure coursing through your body as you came from your high.
Miguel groaned as he felt your walls tighten around his cock. "You always feel so good, mi amor, I never want to leave." Miguel bucked his hips into you one last time before you felt him spill deep inside you. Miguel rode out his high before he removed himself from you, capturing your lips one last time.
Miguel found a place in the water to rest against as you both relaxed in the warm water basking in the beauty of your surroundings. After some time you both decided you needed to head back to take a shower and get changed before picking up Gabi at the kid center.
Getting dressed you walked hand in hand back to the cabin, where your both got in the shower to save time, and to maybe have another quick session before washing off and getting ready.
You both head and walk towards the kid center as you wrap yours arms around Miguel's bicep, to which he places a kiss to your cheek saying, “ I love you.” As you look up to him with a loving smile replying, “I love you more.”
When you arrive to the kid center you see other parents picking up their kids, walking in you see Gabi talking with a few other girls before spotting you and Miguel. She waved goodbye before running into your arms, as you pick her up.
“How was your day?”
“It was amazing! We played games in the grassy field, and we made s’mores. I ate two. And I told my friends that we built a fairy house, and that a fairy stayed there over night. They thought that was really cool.”
“Two smores! Are you going to be able to have one tonight?” Miguel said making Gabi’s eyes widen.
“Yes! I can still have more! I’m not full.”
“Ok princesa. I’ll trust you on this one. Let’s go sign you out.” As you carry Gabi you and Miguel walk to the camp counselor you talked to this morning.
“Hi Mr. And Mrs. O’Hara. Gabi had a really fun day. She told us about how she built a fairy house with her mom. Everyone loved it they were all built them too. And might make it a fun activity to do at the kid center.” Your eyes widen, when she mentioned you again being Gabi’s mom. It melted your heart to think that Gabi called you her mom to other kids. You wondered if she was too shy to call you mom. Maybe because you only have been living with them for almost 4 months. You glanced at Miguel when the counselor made the mistake, but you noticed his smile only widened by the comment.
After signing Gabi out, you set her down and she wanted to hold both your and Miguel’s hand as you walked back to the cabin, where Miguel decided to start making dinner while you helped Gabi wash up and change her clothes.
After dinner Miguel received a call and took it in the living room when you took all the dishes and began to wash them in the kitchen. You heard him end the call before turning on the cartoons on the tv for Gabi to watch before you heard his footsteps walk into the kitchen.
“Do you need any help with the dishes?”
“Nope, just have this last plate. Then I’m done.”
“The person I was on the phone with was real estate agent. I bought this cabin.” He said.
Your eyes widened turning to him. “That’s amazing. I thought this place was a campsite?”
“It is. But you can buy the properties and some of the land around it so we can expand it. It’s just been an amazing time up here this time around, and I want to make it an official tradition to come up here. Like a family place away from the hustle and bustle of Nueva York and the prying eyes of our neighborhood.”
“I think that a great idea. It’s so beautiful up here. It definitely is a nice place to go to get away from everything and everybody.”
“I think we should tell Gabi on Christmas. It’ll be one of her gifts. A gift for all of us.” Miguel smiles.
After you finish cleaning up the kitchen you spend the rest of the night watching a family movie, as you cozy up with Miguel on the couch with Gabi on his other side.
The next morning you all woke up early to pack and put everything in the car before driving back home. While packing things into the car with Miguel you felt that familiar off feeling, like someone was watching you. You decided not to bring it up to Miguel this time, not wanting to worry him as you thought it might have been your imagination.
As everyone got in the car and drove away, unnoticed by either you nor Miguel were brown eyes in another car nearby watching from afar.
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Hope you enjoyed it!💕
Tag List
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girls-alias · 4 months
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Tattoo - Dean Winchester
Title: Tattoo - Dean Winchester Words: 2,305 Relations: Dean Winchester X reader. TW: Strong language, slight nudity, sexual hinting.
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[Why does the right gif look like it's reacting to the first 😂]
I sighed slamming the anti-possession tattoo design on the artist's table. "This is what I want," I explained simply. The artist looked it over once, a quick glance before scoffing and shaking his head. I sucked my teeth, annoyed instantly by his reaction.
"I'm not doing that, it's demon shit," He slid the design off the table, it falling slowly onto the floor. I glared at him knowing for a fact I would not be the one to pick that up.
"It's actually the opposite it's to protect me from demon shit. So, either pick up the design and get started or pick up the design and wish me a great day," I instructed, my tone forceful as I rested my hands on the table between us. He gave me his full attention. "Either way, you're picking it up," I added. He scoffed looking at me like I was stupid.
"Bitch, if you-" He didn't have time to finish his sentence as I slammed his head into the table. He jumped backwards, holding his busted nose. Looking at me terrified. I was angry beyond reproach.
"Call me a bitch again and I'll pull your teeth out so the next time you say it, it's sounds like your saying bench," I threatened. "Get up. Walk around this table. Pick it up." I said simply, emphasising my anger as I maintained eye contact. He hesitated to get up, cowering as he got closer to me. I stared him down even though he was taller than me, he bent down, using one knee to get low as he grabbed the design. He went to stand but I grabbed the shoulder of his shirt, stopping him from standing but looking up at me scared. I smirked. "Wasn't so hard, was it?" I asked menacingly with a smirk. He shook his head slowly like he was afraid to upset me. I smirked wider. "Now wish me a great day," I instructed, looking at him expectantly.
"I hope you have a really great day, sorry I couldn't help," He quickly spoke. I smiled politely, innocently.
"Thanks, you too," I added cheerfully before grabbing my design and walking out.
I had gone to 5 different tattoo studios, all getting denied and I was growing impatient and reckless. My anger rose before a plan formed in my mind. I smirked knowing it was genius.
Dean's POV:
Y/N had been gone all day. I know she was getting her tattoo but it shouldn't be this long. She's been gone since I woke up till now, I rechecked my watch growing anxious. I should have gone with her. I know she didn't want me to because 'she's an independent woman who doesn't need a man to hold her hand' or at least that's what she tells me every time I suggest protection on a hunt or company for certain things. She is the most stubborn woman I know, and I've met plenty of stubborn women. She only decided to stay at the bunker with us for a few weeks because she wanted a break from motels.
"Will you stop tapping your foot?" Sam asked annoyed as he looked up from his book.
"Where is she? She should have been back hours ago," I rambled, anxiously checking my watch again. 9PM. Where is she? I wonder if she was snatched? Is she okay?
"Dean, will you calm down? She's probably just gotten distracted." He tried but I scoffed.
"What if she's been abducted and we're just sat here?" I asked but Sam laughed, holding his finger in the book to keep his place as he lowered it to give me his full attention.
"We are talking about the same Y/N, right? She's been abducted, starved for months, tortured and still escaped. We did nothing to help, she just called us for a ride like nothing happened," He explained but I rolled my eyes.
"Yeah, but that was before she moved in," I tried but Sam looked at me confused.
"She hasn't moved it, she wanted a break and came here. You must be head over heels in love if you think she's staying," He chuckled, going back to his book but noticing my silence. I wanted to deny it but my mouth didn't work. He looked up from the book, studying me a second before slamming the book down not caring about keeping the page anymore. "You're in love with Y/N?!" He practically shouted but I rolled my eyes, getting up to leave. He didn't take the hint that I was leaving because of him so followed me. "I knew you wanted to fuck her but I didn't realise you were in love," He continued. I groaned, walking down the hall aimlessly.
"I'm not in love with her," I tried but even I could tell my tone showed how bad I was lying.
"You are, oh my God. You have to tell her before she leaves." He cheered but I rolled my eyes. I stopped in my tracks, facing him looking annoyed.
"She tells us every day that she doesn't need a man to hold her hand, she'd laugh in my face if I told her," I sighed, finally giving in because this topic has been clouding my judgment for months. Ever since she wore a dress to a hunt and still looked badass I knew I wanted more than sex, when Lucifer himself threatened her and she practically scared him off I knew it was love. Ever since I have grown to love her more, even small things I wouldn't normally notice became my fixation. Like how she mouths the words when she reads slightly or bites down on her nail when she's thinking. All of it made me fall deeper in love with her. Yet she shows no interest in me.
"She doesn't need a man to hold her hand but she might want one," Sam tried but I scoffed.
"We've known her for over a year, I've never once seen her hint at even sex never mind a relationship," I explained. Sam went to dismiss my comment but stopped to look at me confused. He heard it too. I turned around, there's something here. It sounded like something metal clinking against marble. Confused I walked down the hall. Maybe she's back, hopefully, she didn't hear our conversation.
I approached Y/N's door as Sam stood close behind me, I pushed the door open. I froze as I noticed Y/N on her knees in front of the fire shirtless. She had a maroon bra on and hadn't noticed us. I watched mesmerised and perplexed by what she was doing. My jaw dropped as she pulled an iron stake from the fire and pressed it to her chest over her heart. I wanted to rush in and stop her but I was stunned as rather than scream she dropped her head back and groaned. It was borderline pornographic and would definitely infect my mind many times in the future. Sam grabbed my shoulder but didn't move, it pulled me back to reality, I glanced at him seeing his jaw drop open and concern written all over his face. I looked back at her, eyes wide as she moaned again, pushing the stake a little harder before pulling it away. My mouth dried as I watched the scene.
"I love you," She looked up at us, completely unfazed. You wouldn't think she branded herself just seconds before. She looked at me confused and it hit me that I said it out loud. She put the stake down with a smile, chuckling softly before she stood up, not bothered by her shirtless figure as she faced me. I knew Sam would be looking away but my eyes wouldn't let me. My God!
"Good to know," She said slightly confused. I sighed realising she probably thinks I'm a creep. I mean, I am. She's standing shirtless, in a maroon bra but brand new burn above her heart I should be concerned about but I can't take my eyes off her chest. My God. I've never been a tits man but for her, I'm an everything man.
"What did you do?" Sam asked. I finally pulled my eyes away as I glanced at him, he turned away to look up the hall. He has more willpower than I do.
"No one would give me the tattoo so I branded myself," She explained as if it was no big deal. I looked at her concerned, slightly worried and turned on. I fall deeper in love.
"Why wouldn't you just go somewhere else?" Sam asked but she rolled her eyes and walked away to grab a cardigan, tying it around herself loosely so the fabric didn't touch her burn but covered herself. I frowned slightly. I finally looked at the burn. I rushed forward moving the cardigan slowly to see it fully.
"What the fuck, you actually did it," I exclaimed as I looked at the red skin surrounding the black burn. A perfect print of the anti-possession tattoo that matched Sam and I's.
"Well, yeah," She chuckled as if it were obvious. We saw her do it, I wouldn't doubt she would have if she'd told me beforehand but anyone else would be too scared. Not Y/N, not perfect Y/N. Sam followed me in, looking at it closely. We shared a look before I stepped back. She laughed as she shrugged. "It's not a big deal," She shrugged moving away to grab her glass from the top of the drawers. I narrowed my eyes at her.
"Did it not hurt?" I asked, my concern showing in my tone. She chuckled.
"I've felt worse," She shrugged taking a sip of her drink. God, I really do love her.
"I'm going to get the first aid kit. No more branding while I'm gone," Sam warned but she chuckled as he walked out.
"Aw, but I had a tramp stamp made too," She joked but looked at me with an innocent smile. "I actually have another one if you want to do it for me?" She asked but I looked at her like she was crazy. She rolled her eyes, moving to kneel in front of the fire again.
"What? No!" I exclaimed, grabbing her shoulder to try and move her away.
"Ow," She exclaimed, I quickly pulled my hands away, thinking I pressed on her burn. I knew I fell for her trick when she quickly grabbed another stake that was heating in the fire, pulled the tie on her cardigan and pushed it into her skin above her right hip. I gasped, readying for her to scream but she groaned again. Standing above her and looking down on the scene only made it hotter. My God. I turned away knowing I would soon be erect if I didn't try to clear my mind.
"What are you doing?" Sam exclaimed from the door, quickly rushing in, he grabbed the stake, burning his hand slightly as he dropped it to the floor. She rolled her eyes with a theatrical groan.
"You're so boring, Dean didn't mind," She played but I quickly protested.
"I tried to stop her," I held my hands up in defence as Sam looked at me shocked. Sam shook his head, turning his eyes to the first aid kit he brought in with him. Y/N seemed to smirk.
"I can patch myself up," She groaned but Sam shook his head, avoiding looking at her.
"No, I'm putting my foot down." He insisted. I watched, amazed he stood up to her. I wouldn't even do that even if I had a death wish.
"You can't even look at me," She chuckled. Sam looked her in the eyes for a second before looking away not wanting to gawk at her. She laughed, sitting back so she could move her legs from under her.
"I'll do it," I chimed in. I regret it instantly. She looked at me, her eyebrows showing she was shocked but her clenched jaw and eyes told me she wasn't happy. I shouldn't have said anything, she'll kill me and I'd thank her while she did it. She dominates me with just eye contact how am I going to put my foot down to her?
I took Sam's place in front of her, I avoided her eyes as I knew if I looked into them I would lose the nerve. Sam walked out as she took the cardigan off. I used all my focus to look at the branding and not her boobs. I saw her smirking in my peripheral vision.
"So, you love me?" She asked, teasing in her tone. I gulped. I need to grow a backbone, she has too much control over me. Now that I'm putting my foot down to her, it's the perfect time.
"So what if I do?" I asked, focusing on her anti-possession brand as I began cleaning it. She didn't even flinch when the alcohol touched her burns, she just moaned. I felt my blood rushing to where I didn't want it. I focused on my actions hoping I had enough control to get through this.
"I just think that's a weird thing to say after watching someone brand themself," She commented with a slight shrug. I glanced at her lips as she bit down. My breath hitched, and I fixed my eyes on the brand.
"Maybe that's my kink," I tempted but she smirked.
"It is now," She smirked. I gulped, finally looking at her face to see she was looking flirtatious. A look I had never seen her make before. I smirked.
"To rights," I confirmed. She smiled as she rested back on her hands letting me clean her without argument. This was the best thing that could have happened!!!!
Masterlist
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The Engagement
(Luca Changretta x Shelby sister reader)
Summery: You had made it very clear already. You had absolutely no intentions of marrying Luca Changretta for a business deal.... So your brothers really should have been suspicious when you eagerly requested for them to set up a meeting for you and your fiancé one neutral ground.... And they should have been scared when you choose Alfie's shipyard as that neutral ground....
A/N: Hi Y'all! No trigger warnings besides peaky language and threats I think! There are talks about an arranged marriage, but once again we'll see how that goes over.... This is the first time I've like written Luca besides just mentions so I hope I did alright! Also I write this like two weeks ago but forgot to edit it until today oops! Enjoy!❤️
WC-5.0k
Part 1- The Proposal Main Masterlist
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"Remind me again why the fuck we're we're here Tom?"
"Ask her. She was the one who choose the meeting place."
"Keep in mind that she can also hear you perfectly well brother darling, and if you ask that question one more time you won't be so lucky."
Arthur raised his hands in surrender as he took a seat by John as you all sat waiting for your company to arrive. Well, Tommy didn't sit. He just stood with a cigarette hanging from his mouth watching the entrance gate of the loading dock. 
"All I don't understand is why you wanted to meet him here. After all, we're Romani blood right?"
"Yes Arthur."
"And Luca's Italian blood?"
"Correct"
"So why the fuck are we meeting at the fucking Jew's shipyard?"
"I actually agree with that. Why are we here? Isn't it suppose to be neutral ground or what not?" John chimed in and even Tommy tilted his head in concession. Even he wasn't sure why you choose to meet Luca in Alfie's territory. He would have rather met in Charlie's yard, but you'd insisted on being here, in the small boat yard on the edge of Alfie's territory. 
"Simple. If he hates both of you he can't favor either of you. Thus neutral land is formed."
"That's some wise fucking words if I've ever heard them, poppet." 
Turning around you smiled at the approaching gangster, his loyal dog strolling a few steps ahead. Reaching out you began to coo at the large dog who was eager to receive his belly rubs. Playing with Cyril always improved your mood. You ignored the groans of your brothers and John grabbing on to Arthur's coat to he decided to lunge.
"Hello Arthur!"
"Fuck off!"
"Oi! No fighting," you interrupted getting between the two men, "Now he may hate you all, but he can still hate one more than the other so let's not push it."
Alfie nodded his head mockingly behind you as you gently shoved your eldest brother away. Sending him back to his seat, you gave Tommy a short glare for not stepping in, to which he just shrugged, and then turned towards Alfie again.
"But really why are you here?"
"Can't a man walk his own property?"
"Sure, but you said everything would be ready for when Mr. Changretta arrived. You're not suppose to be here. It's to be a private affair."
"And it is. Just making one last check to see if you lot are all ready and make one last proposal of my own. Also I wanna remind ya not to get any blood on my dock. Just had it redone all nice and such. I wouldn't want your ugly guts staining the finish. I saw their ugly fucking cars pulling up down the street on my way in. Should be here any minute. It's a shame thou init? Pretty thing like you is too good for any of these cunts. If you'd like I can kill them all now and you can run with me, eh poppet? You can play with my dog any day you want." 
You laughed as both Arthur and John stood up this time with indignant protests. Even Tommy tensed up and turned to glare at the man who had spoken.
"Alright then Mr. Solomons," you drawled, patting the man's chest, "While that is just a lovelyoffer, unfortunately I am already taken for," a quick glare at Tommy, "though you're welcome to leave the dog anytime. He's such a lovely boy." Cyril wagged his tail at the attention shoving his head into your leg like an over grown cat looking for head scratches. Ones you were more than happy to oblige.
"Well then, I best be off now haven't I mates? Unlike you lot I know to appease a pretty woman with her desires. Y/N." Alfie nodded his head as he stared to head off, Cyril waiting until his master had called thrice before leaving your side. It wasn't until they'd both rounded the corner when the company you'd finally be waiting for arrived. Three black cars pulled up smoothly before coming to a halt. From your place in the shipping yard you watched nine men exit the cars. A few more than you had expected but still not any issue.
Your brothers walked up first, and you saw Tommy moving to shake someone's hand. The man was tall with dark slicked back hair and he wore his hat slightly tilted on his head. He looked stupid. In his mouth sat a toothpick that he seemed to enjoy munching on as he listened to your brother speak. He looked like a cow when he did that you'd stubborn decided. A stupid cow. A handsome cow. But a handsome stupid cow. Stupid. handsome. cow man. asshole.....ok so obviously still you weren't happy to be there. After all, this was the man who threatened to kill your entire family. Even the children, and you made a habit of disliking anyone willing to harm children. They didn't have to want any of their own or even like them in general, but to be willing to harm something so innocent to the crimes being punished seemed wrong to you. So even without meeting the man you knew you despised him. What kinda lowlife monster would be willing to hurt innocent kids to get his revenge? ....Evidently one you're brothers we're willing to marry you too. But was there really no other deal he'd make for peace? Well....If things went to plan you were about to find out. 
"I'm glad you were able to consider my proposal Mr.Shelby, I think it's much nicer this way isn't it?"
You didn't even try to hide your disbelieving laugh as the New York Gangster's words reached your ears. Immediately the attention went you, and since he was closer now, you could see the faint outline of a permanent  stubble outlining his lower face. Stupid veryhandsome cow man. As he looked towards you for the first time Luca raised and eyebrow.
"Do you find something amusing?"
Tilting your head slightly, you smiled with a false sweetness. Out of the side of your eye, you noticed your brothers tensing up slightly. Be it from the fact Luca was so close or that you interrupted their conversion. Either way, they began to notice the glint in your eye. And slowly they were regretting allowing you to meet Luca before the wedding. As if an introduction at the alter would have been any better.
"Yes. Very amusing in fact. See, I came here thinking it was ME being proposed to," clasping a hand mockingly to your chest you continued, "But here we are and the only one being romanced is my beloved brother. ...Well, romanced isn't the word, that's got to be the shittiest proposal I've ever heard. 'I'm glad you've considered my proposal'.... poppycock! Aren't you Italians suppose to be good at this romance shit?"
Arthur choked on his tongue besides you as Tommy spoke your name in warning, which you ignored. Luca moved his toothpick around his mouth and he gave you a once over. If you hadn't already been set on hating this man, his stare would have sent a pleasant shiver down your back in a way few could these days. Finally, letting out a small but still amused hum, Luca reached out to shake your hand. 
"Y/N, I presume?"
"Shelby. Y/N Shelby....Miss Y/N Shelby is my name. And you are too close, back up," you stated firmly. The special emphasis on both 'Shelby' and 'Miss' was more than enough to let anyone know your feelings on the current situation. Luca only raised his eyebrow again and rescinded his unaccepted hand. 
"I'm Lu...."
"I know who you are," you interrupted.
"Really," Luca queried. Surely you didn't know enough about him then if you were treating him so flippantly, he thought. He was the man determined to end you entire bloodline only a few weeks ago. You should be terrified of what would happen if he decided he didn't want to marry you!! But no, he thought, instead you were....
"You're the man who thinks finger paintings are scary."
Luca's toothpick fell from his mouth, while John could be heard covering his laugh. Then his eyes narrowed and his voice became slightly darker.
"What did you say?"
Tommy put a hand on your shoulder as he stepped forward to put himself between you two. But before he could open his mouth to take control of the situation again, yours opened first. You waved your hands around in sarcastic  excitement as you spoke, imitating the man's voice.
"What were you helping 'mama' with her lesson plan one day, making hand turkeys and decide, 'ohhh THUMBS! Terrifying?! That'll be a great way to show people not to mess with me!'"
Luca's eye twitched and if he hadn't already lost it, you were sure he would have snapped the toothpick between his teeth, his jaw was clenched so tightly.
"Watch your tone with me woma..."
"OR WHAT? You'll send me a finger painting?"
Arthur wrapped an arm around your waist and began to pull your back. No, he didn't like how Luca was speaking to you, but he also didn't want you to start a war of your own today. Even if he had a good idea you'd win. And yet still you weren't deterred. 
"Can it be pink and have confetti? OOHH or maybe it can be red like the blood that's gonna run down your throat when imaamuahhh," Arthur hissed as you bit the hand covering your mouth, but it was enough time for Tommy to finally step in again. Briefly...
"She doesn't mean that. It's the fa..."
"He's right! I don't!" You interjected again, freeing yourself of your eldest brother, "I'm not actually a fan of blood, so I won't slit your throat, but I'd be carefully of the champagne at the after party. Never know what slips in the cups these days..."
This time it was John who grabbed you, though not as roughly as Arthur, but luckily for everyone you had finished.... for now. The entire yard was silent and even Tommy was at a small loss for what to say. Truth be told he didn't know if there was anything to say. It was a long enough shot to convince Luca that marriage would be a way to end the vendetta and now here you were, possibly ruining that chance within half an hour. While he could understand your anger, there was still a part of him that was annoyed at the fact you could be so tactless. Another part though, the part that was still your big brother, was incredibly proud and resisting the urge to laugh at your comments. Luca however, remained unimpressed.
"My apologies, Miss Shelby," Luca restated, started to become more than annoyed with your antics. Surely, you knew that he was the one holding the power here? If your family had it, there was no way they'd have even considered the marriage. He was the one holding all the cards and you were instead choosing to act as though this entire plan was your idea. In a quieter, and deceitfully threatening voice, Luca ignored your demand for space and leaned closer to your ear. "Though, one would think for a woman in your situation, you'd be a little more welcoming to your fiancé. After all, I've been so generous to reconsider my previous message of vendetta, haven't I Bella?"
John could be heard whispering to Tommy, probably demanding to be allowed to hit the taller man, but he was held back. Again, you ignored your brothers instead focusing on the man before you, who's just said one of the worst things he could have.
"Generous? You think you're generous to try and force a woman into marriage and take her away from her family? Is it generous to not to kill children in exchange for someone else's freedom? Do you expect me to be happy, fucking happy, to have to spend the rest of my life with you when I don't even know you? I don't who you are or what you might do to me. You expect me to just follow your every whim and play housewife, knowing that one day you may kill me to go after my brothers? Is that what you define fucking generosity as," you fumed, just as angry as you were when you first learned about the new deal. "Well, if that's generous then damn all of the generosity in the world to hell! I agreed to come here today to meet you for my family. I am agreeing to consider giving up some of my freedom for their safety, when I'm not even the one who started this whole mess. I could have said no. I could have left them to fend for themselves and likely die over a needless feud, but I didn't. Because I was the one who decided to be generous. I am the one willing to give up something good that I have, to keep spending bad from happening to someone else. That is generous. My drawback for their benefit. I didn't have to do it but I did. Because I love them. So unless you're more incompetent than you've come off so far, I'd try thinking of a better word than generous for that little statement if I was you," speaking tersely you dared Luca to question your speech. Then taking a deep breath you closed your eyes off a moment.
His last comment had thrown you off, setting you off in a way you hadn't meant to go. And while your words were true, this isn't where you wanted the conversation to go. Not if your plan was going to work. It couldn't work if you'd pushed Luca too far too fast. He needed to be in just the right spot for the biggest blow to make the most efficient impact. Sighing, you straightened your shirt and looked down at your shoes. Your glare dropped and an almost desperate look appeared in your eyes briefly. 
"Besides.... is it too much to ask for a proper proposal? Like the one from a story that makes you dream of true love," Tilting your head in an almost wistfully sad way, you'd met Luca's gaze again, noticing that by some miracle he's eyes had softened just slightly. "Even if it's not true it would be nice to pretend wouldn't it? To actually be asked to be one's forever even if it seems there's only one answer? Can't I at least be granted that?"
Luca thought for a moment, taking the time to pull a new toothpick from his pocket. Shooting a brief glance over your shoulder, he saw your brothers staring at him intensely from a few steps behind. It crossed his mind that if he truly did want to, he could kill you here and now. Because he really did have the power in this fight. You stood within half an arms reach and the eight men he'd brought with him far outnumbered your three brothers. It could be an easy fight, over in mere seconds, damned how neutral this ground was suppose to be. He could kill you all now and the vendetta would be settled, AND he wouldn't ever have to deal with your infuriating brothers or your even more infuriating comments ever again. You had showed him no respect up to this point and if it were anyone else they'd have been dead after the first interruption. But you weren't dead, and for some reason, some unknown feeling brewing in the pit of his stomach, Luca wanted do keep it that way. So he unwittingly did exactly what you wanted him to do. 
"You want a proper proposal," Luca drawled, his eyes falling to your lips once and his voice was calmer now, almost softly curious, like he sympathized with your plea, "Is that it? Me asking you, and that's all it'll take for this to be done? You'll be good and stop fighting?"
Smiling sweetly again, a more genuine smile this time you nodded, clasping you hands together and placing them behind you almost shyly as you rocked your feet. It was a complete change from your attitude moments ago. Like all it took was to believe someone was listening to you, for you to become this sweet little demure creature from the fairytales his mother taught in her class. 
And somehow, naively Luca didn't realize the fairytale of your own act now. Giving a pleased smile, at what he assumed was your acceptance of the deal, he nodded, silently agreeing to your desires. Despite your beliefs Luca didn't think of himself as a monster, nor did he want an unhappy marriage either. He didn't necessarily care if you loved him, but it would be nice if he knew you wouldn't betray him. And if he could please his wife, he figured life would be so much easier for him in that matter. So he supposed he could give you this one thing you seemed to so closely desire. Besides, there was, again, this almost funny feeling that had settled in Luca's stomach. He couldn't say what it was but there was apart of him that was almost.... excited to be able to actually propose to you instead of just meeting you at the alter. It was something he couldn't explain and wouldn't admit yet but it was there. And so the next words from his mouth would seal both your fates.... or so he thought as he took the toothpick out of his mouth to fulfil your wish. 
"Y/N Shelby? Would you like to..."
"Wait, not like that!"
Luca froze, his head tilting in confusion at the light frown that has formed on your face. Your brothers, as well as Luca's own men could be here whispering in the background. None of them were really sure what was going on now, but none of them moved, all equally curious to see where this was going. 
"Not like that? Didn't you just say you wanted me to propose?"
"Yes, but I also said propose properly," you insisted, "if you don't do it the right way it may as well mean nothing." 
"And what exactly does 'proper' mean by your standards? What do you want me to do?" There was a small amount of sarcasm in his words due to a voice in his mind that was starting to get annoyed again, but Luca ignored it. It didn't even take you a second of thought before your smile returned. As had the look that worried your brothers in the first place.
"It means get on your knees Mr. Changretta."
Silence echoed across the entire shipyard. Almost all the men present stood in shock, eyes wide, even Tommy at what you'd just said. Luca however just tilted his head to the side, his hat looked straight now, processing. The deceptively sweet smile still lingered on your face as you waited for a response.
"You said to get on my knees.... to propose to you?" he repeated slowly, wanting to confirm you'd actually just demanded that of him. He wanted to be sure you had the audacity to order such from him. 
"I want you on your knees Luca....now."
....
Luca listened. 
For some reason, one nobody would ever be able to explain, he did as you said. The toothpick was clenched tightly between his lips as he slowly lowered himself to one knee, eyes locked with yours the entire time. His men could be heard whispering to each other behind him, and Luca knew he'd have to have a talk with them later about what they saw. Luca took a deep breath in, contemplating if this was actually going to happen, if he was actually doing this....Evidently he was. 
"Y/N Shelby..." he paused a moment as you stuck out your hand indicating he should take it... He did. You couldn't see it, but Tommy was looking up at sky, lips tightly together trying to hide his smirk. John and Arthur did have to turn around to hide their grins now too. Luca started again. The words were spoken with a slight hint of sarcasm as he repeated by the title you'd reminded him of earlier. Luca tilted his head in question, and if he did it any more his hat probably would have fallen off. 
"Y/N Shelby, Miss Y/N Shelby.... would you do me the honor of marrying me, Luca Changretta, and become my wife?"
"No."
Luca almost choked on his toothpick, he inhaled so quickly, his cheeks darkening a slight tint of red. You hadn't even paused for a moment to think, bluntly rejecting the man on his knees before you. Squeezing his hand lightly, you smiled again, though now Luca could see the true meaning of the look and realised that you never had any intentions of accepting his proposal at al. You just wanted to make a fool out of him down on his knees. Quickly, that embarrassment turned to anger as Luca shot to his feet, pulling you closer by the hand and seething in your face. Behind you, your brothers shot into action as well, all tensing up and reaching for their guns. But they knew that even if necessary, they'd have no shot as you were practically shielding Luca with you body because if where they stood. 
"That's is enough! Who the fuck do you think you are to fucking make me kneel..."
"Step back Luca," you interrupted, undetected by his ranting, but he ignored you.
"Don't tell me to fucking step back woman. If you think you can treat me...."
"Step back Luca," you repeated again calmly, but it only served to anger him more.
"STEP BACK! Step fucking back!! I will stand wherever I fucking want to stand," and with that he stepped even closer, to where the tip of his nose was touching yours. "You don't seem to understand anything going on."
"Actually I..."
"NO! Your precious brothers are going to have a bullet coming out of every fixing hole they have in ten seconds in you don't fucking listen," His hands were on your shoulders know gripping you roughly. The toothpick in his mouth almost stabbing you in the face as he spoke. "You are not the one in power here, I am. You do not make the calls, I do. I am the one who can tear apart everything you hold dear." Luca leaned his head back arrogantly, looking down at you over nose. He was still less than an arm's length part. "I have nine men and you have three. So who's to fucking stop me from killing your brothers and having my way with you right now?"
A shot rang though the air.
Luca's toothpick was still in his mouth, but now half of it had been blown to sawdust by the bullet passingly cleanly before his face. 
You just smiled...
"I told you to step back Luca..."
Every man in the ship yard ignored you, reaching for their guns, trying to find the shooter. Even your brothers looked around, slightly panicked, not knowing who fired the gun.... Or whose side they were on. The surprise of the shot, had loosened Luca's grip on you as you freed yourself and took a few steps back. Two more shots rang out from somewhere, landing close to Luca's feet, creating more space between the pair of you as he stumbled back. Then the shipyard went quiet again. Not a single man moved, for fear the next shots wouldn't be so harmless. Still searching for the ambusher Luca turned towards Tommy.
"I thought you said this was neutral ground! It's suppose to be private," He demanded, completely ignoring the fact he, himself had just threatened you on the very same neutral ground.
"It is. Or it's fucking suppose to be. I have no clue what's going on," Tommy replied, just as concerned. He should have known Alfie would play dirty. He hadn't counted on you doing it either though.
"But it's just that Mr. Changretta," clasping your hands together, you started towards the Italian man again, having no fear of getting shot. "As I told my brothers earlier, 'If he hates both of you he can't favor either of you. Thus neutral land is formed.' And I promise, Alfred Solomons hates both of you."
Luca huffed and narrowed his eyes. "I suppose this was your doing too?"
"Of course. See that 'you' is spelled without an 'me'.....and me, well I, have a very good relationship with a certain man's dog. And it is just amazing what a man will do when his dog likes you."
No one spoke so you continued. Though your face remained composed in an accomplished grin, you were almost bouncing on the balls of your feet due to your excitement. Your plan was going very nicely. Laughing, you carelessly spun around once, observing the mass of boxes and boats and building around you.
"They're amazing are they? Snipers? Could shoot your hat off from half a mile away  and you'd have never even heard the shot. Do you know how many snipers during the war were Jews? I don't, but I understand that Mr. Solomons employee a decent number of them. And when my dear friend heard of this whole marriage ploy?.....Well he righteously shared my outrage and offered to help me." Now you had taken to walking circles around your target. Now Luca realised that it was in fact you who had all the power, since the moment his tires hit the yard's ground. "And luckily for you, I did manage to curve his "help" from something a little bit less...murdery? Perhaps. After all, I do prefer to avoid violence if I can. There are so many more civilised methods than that...And finally we settled on this. The 'official engagement' taking place in this very yard, where I politely ask you to rethink your offer. And if you don't, we try to renegotiate.... and if you don't agree to that.... well. Luca you were wrong earlier..... I have far more than three men. All of who are very inclined to keep me safe. Now they've been instructed not to injury unless necessary, but that doesn't mean they can't give a warning shot. It doesn't mean they have to either. They were being very very nice just now. And you can't see them, but I promise they've had their sights on you for a while now. Why not give them a smile and then I'll tell you how this is gonna go." You opened your arms wide as if showing off everything. Luca just watched chewing on the half of his toothpick that remained. 
"How what's gonna go?" It actually wasn't Luca who spoke up. Nor was it your brothers. One of Luca's men, had asked the question. You turned and smiled at the man nodding you head once as if pleased that someone was participating. Luca made a mental note to beat the man later for encouraging you.
"See I really don't want to marry you. I don't love you. I don't even know you. There's also the fact you threatened everyone I love. But I also understand you and my brothers' small minds are incapable of imagining deals involving anything other than fighting or fucking and I don't particularly want to do either of those things with it right now. So I've come up with a new plan and who knows, maybe it'll work out in everyone's favour. Are you ready to hear it?" You paused waiting for a response. When none came you raised and eyebrow and made a point of glancing towards a rooftop over Luca's shoulder. "Do you want to know how this will work Luca?"
"Fine."
"Perfect! So you WILL take back your little finger paintings, but I will NOT be marrying you anytime soon. However, for the good of our families I am presenting another option. Luca Changtetta, I will NOT marry you on a whim, but," You paused for a moment for dramatic effect, waiting until Luca tilted his head. "Should you agree... I will let you take my hand in courtship for one year. And I promise it will not be easy for you. If you manage to whoo me, the you can have your marriage. If not.... Well then I should hope by that day we are close enough friends to put the past behind us and everyone can go their separate ways."
Luca tilted his head in confusion, "What?"
Bloody hell, this man needed to pick up a romance novel. Huffing slightly your reworded your demands. 
"Luca, you have a year to date me and make me fall in love with you. If you do I'll marry you. If not the you have a whole year to give up or come up with a better plan than killing everyone. Got it?"
"Why the fuck didn't you just say that in the first place? And what if I don't want to court you?"
"Because I didn't wanted to. And if you don't want to play then you can give up now or let the snipers play target practice."
Luca nodded his head and thought for a moment. The right choice was obvious as the fact that you were crazier than Alfred Solomons. After all, first you were threatening to kill him for trying to marry you, and now he had a year to change your mind. Luca's hand was still wrapped around his gun and he had half a mind to use it. The only thing keeping him from shooting you was the fact he knew, he'd have at least five bullets in him before he pulled the trigger. The obvious choice was to walk away now and give up the vendetta. You had just told him he could stop and you all could go your separate ways. No one else would have to die. All he had to do was give up, admitting you'd outsmarted him. He'd have to admit that you did hold all the power. 
"Well, Mr. Changretta? What do you think of my proposal?"
Luca didn't like admitting anyone else had the power... Even if looked very good on you. And so his choice was made.
"I suppose I better learn your favorite type of flower amore."
"Whatever kind you're most allergic to Romeo"
.....
And so it began...
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cherrycola27 · 1 year
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Red, White, and Rooster
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Series Warnings: Language, alcohol consumption. Frenemies to lovers, relationship of convenience. Political situations. Allegations of affairs, military and political inaccuracies. Eventual smut. 18+ Minors DNI. Banner Credit: @thedroneranger
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Prologue: The Great Debate
Anxiety thrums through your body as you fidget with the knot of his tie. The intrusive thoughts are creeping in, but on the outside, you remain cool, calm, and collected.
"Please tell me why I have to wear a purple tie again?" He asks you with a huff.
You roll your eyes as you begin the same speech you have before every other debate. "Democrats wear blue, Republicans red, you're an Independent, so—"
"You wear purple to show that you're the perfect mix of both," He groans as he finishes your sentence.
You look up to him with hard eyes. You don't miss the flash of a genuine smile across his face before some television assistant comes to remind you that you have five minutes until he needs to be in place.
"Alright. This is the last debate before voting begins. By some miracle of God and my amazing campaign managing, you're ahead in the polls. Don't fuck this up for me." You tell him as you smooth out the arms of his suit.
"Don't fuck it up for you? I'm the one who is going to be in the Oval Office dear." He smirks at you.
"And I'm the one who is getting you there, and who is going to your Chief of Staff,— dear. So, like I said, don't fuck this up for me." You smirk back.
One more debate, you thought. You had to get him through one more debate and a few last-minute campaign stops, and then all your hard work would pay off.
If everything went according to plan, Lieutenant Bradley 'Rooster' Bradshaw would be the 47th president of the United States, and you, Y/N Wiseman, would be the youngest Chief of Staff to ever serve at just twenty-nine years old.
"Roos, Wise-woman, yall about ready?" His running mate, Lieutenant Jake 'Hangman' Seresin called out. "Or are you two still fighting over a tie?"
"We're good, Jake," you reply as you step back to admire your handy work. You've done a good job.
Bradley is in a dark grey suit with a deep plum colored tie. His silver watch is smart, but not flashy. His dark brown shoes offer a nice contrast to the suit without clashing. His sandy brown locks are styled to appear neat but casual. His mustache is trimmed to give him an edge of maturity.
It was something that most men his age didn't need, but being thirty-five and running for president, it was necessary for him. If elected, he would be the youngest to ever serve.
No, not if. When he is elected, he will be the youngest to ever serve.
"Alright, let's get this show on the road." You clap your hands. Bradley and Jake follow you out of the room. Bradley is directed to his mark while you and Jake find your seats.
You hear the welcoming music as the moderator steps on stage and beings speaking to the cameras. Applause and cheers cry out as the candidates step up to their podiums.
You take a deep breath. This is it. These next two hours are going to make or break over a years worth of work.
If someone had told you a year ago that the two former Navy pilots turned politicians, you met in a D.C. bar who hired you because of a bet were weeks away from winning the White House because of you, you would have laughed in their face.
But one game of pool, several beers, tears, and sleepless nights later, it was happening. It was so close, you could almost taste it.
.........................
"Oh my God you fucking killed it out there man!" Jake smacks Bradley on the back as soon as the three if you make it back stage from the debate.
Jake was right. Bradley did kill it out there. Your phone is already blowing up with Google Alerts from various media posts declaring him the winner of the debate.
His stances on education, heathcare, immigration, and the military blew his competition out of the water.
Frankly, he didn't have any competition because the other two candidates could only seem to focus on how young he was or his military background. Neither of them spoke much on their policies. Instead, they chose to try and poke at Bradley's past. However, that proved to be fatal for them.
America had rallied around Bradley's tragic childhood of losing his father at two, then being raised by a single mother, who died when he was barely nineteen. Bradley hadn't wanted to play the orphan card, and you really tried not to, but when he was lacking the polls, early in the campaign, you did what you had to do. He was mad at you for weeks but changed his tune when he saw the numbers.
One candidate, Reece Johnson, had tried to frame Bradley and Jake as monsters and killers since they were former military. You quickly rewrote the narrative, painting them as heros who received the medal of honor during their last flight mission. Bradley for risking his life while saving his captain and late father's best friend, and Jake for saving them both.
Every time someone tried to tear them down, you would swoop in and save them. All the while, running a clean campaign for them.
You were broken out of your thoughts by Bradley calling your name.
"Y/N. Hello. Earth to Y/N Wiseman." He waves his hand in front of your face.
"What?" You ask him. "How did I do?" He asks you. You can tell that he values your opinion. No matter how much he gets on your nerves or how much he grumbles. He needs to hear what you have to say.
"You didn't fuck it up for us." You tell him. A smile breaks out across his face. "I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me Wise-woman." He grins.
"Don't get used to it." You shoot back. "Alright, we need to head back to the hotel. We have an early flight to North Carolina tomorrow, and then a few more stops on the East Coast before we head to the Southwest." You remind him and Jake.
They nod their head and grab their belongings.
"I'm going to head to the parking garage and put my things in the SUV. Chapman, Davis, please make sure Mr. Bradshaw and Mr. Seresin make it down safely. Could you also alert Taylor to be waiting for us at the car?" You ask the secret service agents assigned to you three.
"Yes, Ma'am. Would you like an escort?" Davis ask you.
"No, I'll be fine. No one goes after the campaign manager." You joke before waving him off.
......................
You'd just gotten to the parking garage to put your things in when Taylor, your driver, informed you that he'd left his coat upstairs. You assured him you would be fine as he went to retrieve it.
You'd just finished putting your things in the trunk when you heard someone call out your name.
"Y/N!" A voice shouted. You turned around just in time to see a masked person standing a few feet away from you, with the barrel of a gun pointed directly at you.
Your breath caught in your throat. You didn't know what to do. You were frozen.
"Y/N! You bitch! You cost me everything!" They screamed at you. You heard them draw back the hammer of the revolver before they took their aim.
"GUN!" You head someone shout.
It all happened in slow motion. You couldn't fully process what was happening until it was all over.
You heard the deafening bang of a gunshot.
You felt a strong pair of arms wrap around you and pull you into them and down on the ground to safety while two men in black suits charged at the figure.
You watched with blank eyes as they tackled the person to the ground and wrestled the smoking weapon out of their hands.
Your ears were ringing, but you were vaguely aware of someone calling your name.
"Y/N! Are you alright? Are you hurt?" Bradley shook you.
Suddenly, you realized he was the one holding you.
"I—I'm alright." You stutter out just as you hear the click of cameras followed blare of police sirens.
"You—you saved me." You stutter, fully trying to process the situation. More cameras clicked as the press was making their way out of the venue and witnessing what happened.
Suddenly, it hit you. You had been shot at. Bradley and broken away from his security to save you. He had ignored protocol to protect you. He'd put his life on the line for you.
By now, the media and police were swarming around the two of you. Snapping picture after picture of the two of you while asking question after question. You knew those photos would be on every major news outlet, and the story of his heroism would go viral within hours.
As he helped you up, two things crossed your mind.
One, you were thankful to be alive.
Two, you'd just won the White House.
Eeeekkkk! Babes! I hope you enjoyed this first part! I'm excited to here your feedback!
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forever-rogue · 6 months
Note
Howdy, friend. I’ve been stewing for months trying to think of a fluff request to send you, but I’ve come up short bc I generally have smut on the brain. But I think I did find something!
Eddie, not really knowing how to about telling you how he feels, does something extravagant for your birthday—the first birthday he’s been around for? 👀
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AN | Eddie would absolutely plan the best birthday ever! Enjoy 🥰
Warnings | None
Pairing | Eddie x Fem!Reader
Word Count | 2.7k
Masterlist | Main, Eddie 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
"I can't believe you didn't tell me," you looked up from the book you were reading and found Eddie dramatically throwing himself onto the couch. He hadn't been bothered to knock before letting himself into your apartment. You loved that you were both on that level of friendship, "I thought what we had was special."
"Umm…hello to you too?" You bookmarked your page before tossing the book onto the coffee table, "what was it that I didn't tell you?"
"Your birthday," he hissed, lifting his head up and glaring at you from between his messy curls, "you didn't tell me it was next week!"
"I wasn't aware that I had to," you giggled at his dramatics as he scoffed at you. You known him for almost a year now but this was the first birthday of yours that you were spending together, "its not a big deal, Ed. I don't really do much for my birthday normally. It's just another day."
"Another day?" He sat up and clutched at his heart as he shook his head, "I can't believe you're saying that surviving another year of life is no big deal. It's like…a huge deal."
"Eddie," you got up from your comfy, overstuffed armchair and sat down next to him on the couch. He had such a big heart and always showed his love for those around him - it was one of the most endearing things about him, "you are so sweet and lovely, truly. But I don't need anything fancy. Just having you in my life is plenty."
He looked at you with a lopsided grin that was nothing short of magical. You put your hand on his knee and gave it a gentle squeeze. He sighed softly, nudging your side with his elbow and hoping you wouldn't notice the bubblegum hue of his cheeks, "I like having you in my life too, princess. A lot."
If only you knew just how very much.
"Good," you stood up and stretched, unaware of how closely he was watching your every move, "glad we're on the same page. Now come, I was gonna watch make hot chocolate and watch a scary movie. You in?"
"As if that was ever a question," he bounced to his feet and followed after you eagerly, "wait - do you have any mini marshmallows?"
"Duh. I'm not a monster."
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
Eddie wasn't exactly sure what he was going to going to do for your birthday but he knew he was going to do something. It would be something big and all out. He had to let you know how he felt, or at least strongly suggest. He wasn't sure how much longer he'd be able to be just your friend.
Quite frankly, he'd fallen in love with you a long time ago. Probably when he'd met you that night at the bar. The two of you were strangers, both new to New York and without friends. He'd been the first man you'd met that hadn't made you feel uncomfortable and the two of you clicked instantly. You'd quickly become best friends.
But along with that, Eddie had learned about your past heartbreak, including the one that had left you unsure of ever wanting another relationship. That was largely the reason Eddie had made sure to keep things on a friendly level. He didn't want to push you away. 
Now though, he couldn't hold it back any longer. He longed to hold your hand, to kiss you and touch. Everything - all of it. He wanted it all with you.  Despite all the baggage you insisted you had, Eddie wanted you and only. He had lots of baggage too, that's what he always reminded you of. But it didn't matter - you had each other.
You could tell that he was up to something, he’d been acting weird. And that was saying a lot for Eddie. You tried to ask him a few times but he never admitted to anything, and kept insisting that everyone was fine and normal. Peachy. 
Internally, meanwhile, Eddie was anything but peachy. He was busy trying to plan the best birthday ever. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to do anything for your birthday, it just had never been  a big deal for you. As long as you were surrounded by the people you loved and cared about, all was well. This year, you’d realized, it would be different - you didn’t have a ton of friends in New York (save for Eddie of course) and your family was scattered. You didn’t really have any plans or intent to make any plans. You’d have been happy with heading home after work and enjoying some takeout or pizza from one of your favorite places and watching a movie. Preferably with Eddie, but you weren’t going to force anything on him. The last thing you would ever want to do would be to chase him away.
“Eddie?” you cut through his thoughts when you waved your hand in front of his face. The two of you were out at dinner, hitting up your usual weekend spot. He blinked a few times before properly looking at you, “you alright there, space cadet?”
“Mhmm,” he grabbed a big bite of his pasta and shoved it in his mouth, chewing carefully and thoughtfully in order to have a moment to think of what to say to you. You set your own fork down and picked up your beer, drinking the rest of it while staring Eddie down. He was not getting away with his odd little behavior any longer - not that you thought he had anything to hide of course. 
“Mhmm,” you repeated slowly as he swallowed thickly, “what’s up, Eddie? You’ve been acting so on edge this week. Did something happen?”
“No! No,” he calmed down, face warming up as you raised an eyebrow at him, “I was just thinking about your birthday.”
“My birthday,” you repeated as he nodded like you were the crazy one for not making a bigger deal out of your own birthday, “what about it?”
“I just wanted to know if you had any plans and if you didn’t if there was something you wanted to do,” your heart constricted at the sweet smile on his face as you blinked back the stinging at the back of your eyes. No one had ever been as considerate about Eddie, “I don’t want to intrude or just assume that you’d even want to hang out with me but yeah.”
“Of course I want to spend time with you, Eddie. I always want to spend time with you,” you reached across the table and put your hand on top of his and gave it a gentle squeeze, “but just to be clear, I don’t have any plans and I’d love to spend the day with you.”
“O-oh,” his doe eyes grew wide as he let what you had said sink in, “wow. Cool. Is there anything in particular you want to do? Any ideas or requests?”
“I don’t need anything special,” you shook your head sweetly, “just wanna spend time with you, that’s all.”
“Sweetheart,” he huffed dramatically in that very Eddie way that you adored. You laughed softly as he leaned in, “you realize that I’m not going to let that happen, right?”
“Yeah,” you leaned, so close that you could almost kiss him - and you wanted to. You really wanted to. But you couldn’t just go ahead and do that. Not now….but maybe one day, “I know, Eddie.”
“Good,” he reached up and gently booped your nose which only caused you to giggle. He loved that sound way too much - it always made you feel a certain type of way, “I shall plan the day’s festivities then and your only job will be to attend. If you would happen to be agreeable to this of course.”
“I am more than agreeable,” you promised. You had a feeling that somehow this was going to be the best birthday ever. Even just the sheer fact of getting to spend it with Eddie was more than enough. 
If only you knew that Eddie felt the exact same way. 
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
When Eddie had said that he had a great day planned for your birthday, he hadn’t been kidding. Since it was the weekend, you both had the entire day to spend together. It started early in the morning with Eddie coming over to your apartment to take you out to see the sunrise, followed by breakfast at your favorite brunch spot. Normally you wouldn’t have been such an early riser but you had to admit that there was something magical about being up early with only Eddie around and watching the beautiful colors shift and bloom on the horizon. 
After that it was a day of adventures with running around the city, trying to put together the puzzles of the scavenger hunt that Eddie had put together. Because of course he had - it was just a very Eddie thing to do. Eddie was thoroughly amused watching you run around and try to figure out his cryptic riddles. It was even better when your face lit up with each piece that you put together and all the treasures you found along the way.
The day ended up with the two of you outside of the city, at a small restaurant that had a perfect view of the sunset. It was such a sweet gesture and felt incredibly romantic and it definitely settled something within your soul. 
“I don’t think I could have imagined a better day than this, Eddie,” you whispered softly, his eyes reverent and tender as he looked you over. Truthfully, he couldn’t quite have imagined a better day either, “this was really wonderful. No one’s ever done anything this thoughtful for me before.”
A comfortable silence fell over the two of you as you ate in silence, exchanging shy glances every now and then. Something between the two of you had definitely shifted and while you weren’t quite sure what it was, it definitely felt good. After a little while, Eddie set down his fork and cleared his throat, capturing your attention.
“I have to get this out or I don’t think I’ll ever be able to do this,” your eyes widened in surprise as you tried to figure out what Eddie could possibly be referring to. Your mind immediately went to the worst and you were sure that he was going to find some way to end your friendship. You had no clue what you’d do without him - he’d become such a huge part of your life. Honestly, he was probably the singular most important part of your life. 
“Eddie?” your eyes started to tear up when he didn’t say anything for a few moments. He seemed to be looking anywhere but your eyes…until he finally found the courage to. It was hard to read what was in those pretty brown eyes, but you didn’t detect any malice. That was good at least, “what is it?”
“I…” he ran a hand through his curls and let out a low sigh, “I’m in love with you.”
Time seemed to stand still as his words rang around in your head over and over. You tested out every possible meaning of his words. But then it hit you that there was only one - and there was always only one - possible answer.
“Oh,” you blinked at him and his cheeks warmed up as he tried not to panic because of your lack of a full response, “oh.”
“I-I know that you said you have a lot of baggage and umm don’t necessarily want another relationship,” he stammered nervously, letting out a nervous chuckle, “and I’d never want to pressure you or anything to have a relationship or anything more, but I just wanted you to know. It felt wrong not to tell you, like I was being dishonest with you and myself.”
“Eddie-”
“I hope this doesn’t make things awkward between us,” he whispered. He was slowly starting to feel like this had been the wrong decision, “I, umm, you’re just so amazing and I love everything about you and I-I-”
“Eddie.”
“I know you say you have baggage and I have it too and I just…there’s no else I could imagine doing this with,” he was stammering so nervously now that it was nothing but endearing. It still felt like a bit of a wild dream - you’d always imagined that you’d be the one in his position, spilling your guts out to him, “I want to spend my life with you. I want to share all our baggage, no matter how heavy. I just…love you a lot.”
Your lips pulled into a pout before you let out a small sigh. Before you could say anything, you took his face in your hands, brushing your thumb over his cheek before pressing your lips to his and kissing him gently. When you pulled back he looked at you in pure shock and surprise. You couldn’t contain your little giggle of nervous excitement as he pulled himself back to reality. 
“So…umm,” he waved his hands around nervously as he had a tendency to do, “wow. Did you really do that? Did that happen?”
“Yes,” you laughed softly, resting your forehead on his shoulder, “that actually happened, Edward.”
“Does that mean that you might feel the same way? About me?” you lifted her head and pressed a few kisses along his jaw. You put your hand on his neck, gently ghosting your fingers along his soft skin. You felt him practically shiver at your touch; he was watching your every move with curious, soft eyes. 
“Yeah,” a wistful little sound escaped your lips, “I do, Eddie. More than you could ever know. You mean the world to me, you silly, wonderful, amazing man.”
“Wow,” he couldn’t help himself as he leaned in and pressed a soft, tentative kiss to your lips. He could feel your lips pulling into a smile and that made him feel something he couldn’t quite put into words, “will you say it again? Please?”
“I love you, Eddie Munson,” you beamed at him, stomach flipping in happy somersaults, “I want you and only you - every last little bit. I thought I never wanted another relationship again. Turns out, I just had to be patient and wait for the right person - you.”
“Sweetheart,” he never realized until that very moment just how much he needed to hear those words. No one had ever said anything like that to him before, no one had ever chosen him like that - no one had ever loved him like you did, “fuck - I am going to marry the hell out of you one day.”
Your mouth dropped open and pulled into a sugary sweet smile. Of course Eddie would make a declaration like that - but you also knew that he was being serious. In his very own Eddie way, he’d just made a promise that you both knew he would keep. 
“Well, I’ll look forward to that,” you bit the inside of your cheek, “I hope you intend on making good on that promise.”
“Oh I will,” he threw his arms around you in a tight squeeze, giving you what might have been the best hug of all time, “I will. Happy birthday, sweetheart.”
“Thank you, Eddie,” you burrowed yourself into him as much as possible, melting into his gentle touch and warmth, “this has been the best birthday ever.”
“For now - I’ll make it even better next year!”
“I love you, Eddie.”
“I love you, birthday girl.”
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itsgrimeytime · 1 year
Text
The Nurse (Part One) || Rick Grimes (TWD)
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Summary: Before all this, you were a nurse. A nurse who had patients, one of which was a man in a coma. A sheriff, you think, it was all kinda fuzzy now. When it all went sideways, you set up what you could for the man - but had to leave. You'd always wondered where he'd ended up; until in your search of shelter, you run into a familiar face.
TWS: Blood, gore, hospital setting, gun violence (just violence in general), swearing, all things typical of TWD.
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It was an easy day. Or, it was supposed to be. Hell, you had dinner plans. But, working at a hospital isn't always so smooth sailing.
That day you'd just been doing routine, checking up on patients and running files back to the cabinets, taking tests to the lab. You'd just had a breath, eating some incredibly stale pretzels from the vending machine when your pager had started to ping.
And in a blink, there was a rush of feet echoing down the hallway.
"Holy shit," you murmured, launching to your feet, and tossing your trash out with ease. The murmur of frantic beeping and tones you recognized launched you into action.
Just as you poked out of the room, a gurney made its way through the hallway, doctors you knew following closely behind. A familiar stain of red grabbed your eye in the flash that you saw.
"Dr. Madison, what-"
Without breaking a step, they continued rushing down the hall, the man in the gurney, surprisingly quiet.
"Gunshot wound left shoulder," he answered to you, but also just kind of stated, "We're headed to OR 3."
"Is there any family?" You spoke, tone concerned, eager to help how you could.
"Yes, yes. The waiting room, his partner," Dr. Madison, "-police partner."
"Fuck, he's an officer?"
Dr. Madison didn't answer, as the man started to become restless, blue eyes becoming fuzzy. As you found yourself following the gurney, you weren't needed in the OR, but you'd always had a talent for calming patients.
With a look to Dr. Madison, he gave you a nod, and you made your way to the front, "Sir?"
There was a lot of noise, the murmur of machines, the spinning of the gurney wheels, and the tones of the different doctors discussing the amount of blood he was losing but you still heard it.
"Rick," he spoke, in a breathy southern drawl, "-call me Rick."
"Rick," you smiled, a little relief he seemed to be able to communicate, "Hi, Rick, I'm nurse Y/N. Do you-"
There was a breath before his eyes flicked around himself, widening and looking back at you - bright blues, "Where's... Where's Carl and Lori?"
You gently placed a hand on his, to calm him, "Is that your family, Rick?"
"M-My wife, and kid. God, where's my kid?"
"Rick, listen," you spoke, drawing his attention with your hands trying to keep him from moving so much, "-I will find them for you, okay? Your family is safe."
"Promise me, you'll find them," he spoke, breathy, and his eyes cleared of their haze for a second. The blue was like a clear sky; you felt as if he was staring into your soul, and your breath hitched.
"Promise me."
With an exhale, you spoke of your own accord, "I promise."
He leaned back with a cough, but there was some relief there, you could see it. You fell behind the gurney's speed, and felt a shake in your breaths, watching as it disappeared behind an elevator door.
"I promise," you breathed out solidly, and tried to shake the burn of his gaze from your memory.
That was two weeks ago.
Rick Grimes had been in a coma immediately after his surgery, well, after being put to sleep, he never seemed to wake up. Dr. Madison had with ease put him under your care, a trust that was added onto your list, but you hadn't minded, not really.
You'd met Shane first, out in the waiting room, eyes frantic and his hair sticking up from where he seemed to tug on it -his eyes latching on yours. There were a few officers by him, both with hands on his shoulders and they stayed there, as you relayed what you were told to him.
'Is he gonna be okay?'
You told him what you could, doing updates from the OR as soon as you got them. Within a few minutes, more officers had come in tow with a woman -tall, and pretty with brunette hair- and a young boy -the same eyes you'd seen in his father's.
It stuck with you for a second. The pure blue holding onto every word you spoke.
They stuck with you, even more, the hour that they'd confirmed his comatose state, the tremble of the two's lips, and the tone the son spoke to you.
"You have to take care of him," he muttered, eyes shining and watery, "-you have to save him, please."
And with familiarity, you spoke -warm and calm, "I promise."
Despite your promise, you watched as the weeks passed -the light filtering out of their eyes. Rick stayed completely still, the hum of his breathing being the only sound echoing out of the room. Carl, who you had come to know well, stayed as long as he could -talking about any and everything with his dad. Lori sat by his side mostly, holding his hand and rubbing a thumb across the back of it. Shane started at a distance but began to hold her shoulders as they looked at his sleeping face.
And by the third week, the news started to implode, and you were often needed in other rooms. News of airborne sickness growing within the hospital, within dead people.
Visitors weren't allowed in. All staff was kept in.
Rick was still in a comatose state, and all you had were phone calls with the family but eventually, they stopped too. You'd call, but the line was cut -you assumed no one was home.
The reports had stopped even going through, rooms locked with reanimated faces pushing against the glass - some faces you knew and others you never would. Despite the air of the hospital being much different than it once was, you took your duties as seriously as you could.
Patient by patient and doctor by doctor, the hospital began to be infested - no longer locked rooms, but locked wards, operating rooms, and boarded windows. One of the last days you were there, was the day you found Dr. Madison. His face was deteriorating, skin drooping, and blood dried up, god when did he die?
With an exhale, you boarded up what you could and primarily focused on your last patient: Rick Grimes. The world was crumbling around you, but you couldn't leave him -after frantically searching his body for teeth marks, you didn't find any. He could still live.
"It's going to be hell when you wake up, Rick," you spoke, voice scratchy and unused -hair slick with sweat, "-real fucking hell."
When you decided to leave the hospital, it wasn't an easy decision. Not when your morals were so set when your job wasn't complete, but you knew you had to.
So, that day (god only knows the actual date) you started gathering what you could, medicine, bandages, probably expired vending machine snacks, water, and some sort of weapon.
Originally, in the early stages, the hospital simply treated it like a disease- quarantining the sick, and going in with hazmat suits. You watched one of your coworkers get torn to pieces by a simple human jaw.
Then it was locking them in rooms, and drafting cure ideas -along with some intel from a few top scientists, it never quite got too far.
You'd done it first, cornered in the room you'd taken to be your own by one you'd known -a patient that had been there for months, just waiting on a new organ. She'd wanted to be an artist.
You'd cried for 3 days after that, blood smeared all over your face and your hands. They shook for a week after, and sometimes, you still saw the stains on your hands -even though you'd scrubbed it all away as soon as you found an available space.
With all the preparations, you returned to Rick's room.
It was still the same room it had been all those weeks ago, except for the drawn curtains and distant growls that echoed through the hall no matter where you were. Wiping away your eyes, you set to work.
You couldn't be there, but you would be sure he could survive without you. Gathering extra resources and enforcing the windows, your eyes fell on the man. He looked the same, except for the scruff on his chin; and suddenly you remembered Lori kept shaving it -each week she came in and paid extra attention to his skin. Carl and Shane would step out, it always seemed so intimate as she shaved his face - holding it as gently as she could and sometimes she'd be crying. Tears silently falling with the smooth movement of her hands.
You had left during that time as well, only saw in glimpses the gentle touch and affection. If his family was out there... he'd want to be clean-shaven. You owed him that much.
With a breath, you rummaged around in your overnight bag you packed what felt so long ago. It was for when shifts got long, and this one certainly has gotten long.
Finding a razor was easy, and grabbing a lotion from one of the old offices was even easier -they all had been sitting and smelt a little off but you figured it was the best you could do.
And with a shallow breath, you took the razor and shaved the scruff off, a more familiar face appearing in your mind. The motion so intimate it filled a craving in you that you hadn't yet identified. A pleased feeling that somewhere out there, his family would recognize him.
With a bottle of water and a snack left by his bedside, you stepped out of the room and set to make a defense. You locked every room you could, and at the end of the hallway, you boarded up what you could -grateful for the graffiti warning those of what was ahead.
With a breath, you turned around to head out of the hospital, and the fear that crept up your throat was nothing compared to the itching to escape the vicinity. The stink of the dead overwhelmed your nose, and you weren't even sure it could ever get cleared out. Not after being surrounded so heavily by the smell of rotting flesh.
The blood from the corpses that found themselves in your way wasn't exactly helping.
You half wished you'd brought that horrid-smelling lotion, just for something different.
With a gust of breath, you found yourself out of the hospital with blood-drenched hands and eyes clouded in a fuzzy survival instinct.
Inhaling the air in tremendous gulps, you watched the stranded city -eyes solidly on anything that seemed out of place. Your senses had only tripled, but the sun gently shining on your skin had made your body warm with something familiar.
Something you'd missed. Hope.
With a calming exhale, you turned back to the hospital with the sun in the sky and smiled, "Good luck, Rick Grimes."
A/N: Posting this with a plan of a series, but I guess that depends on the vibes and if people like it! Reblogs and comments are appreciated :))
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Note
WIBTA if I backed out of an overseas wedding trip that's in less than 6 months that I've been invited to for over 2 years
(Slight context first. The wedding was meant to be last year but got pushed back to this year. The wedding is for my fiancé's best friend who I've only met a few times. All of us are mid 20s early 30s.)
So this couple is getting married overseas for a destination wedding, and my fiancé (F) is a best man. He's known the groom (J) and his family for most of his life and loves them a lot, and they basically see him as their son. When F and I started dating (about 3 years ago), I met J pretty early on, and was told that naturally I was invited to the wedding. In the nearly 3 years my fiancé and I have been together, I've met J's fiancé and family twice, and each time they've been nothing but very kind to me and told me I was already family to them.
But, I'll be honest, I'm not very comfortable with the family. They are very big partiers, drinkers and smokers (including super early in the day), and I've had bad experiences with substances and people I know to where I intentionally keep my distance from the stuff, and if I'm put in a situation with it where I can't escape I shut down hard. I've previously had a conversation with my fiancé about how uncomfortable I was going to J's family's house because of it, and we talked through it and things are OK, but I still feel bad. Regardless, knowing that the family is very into the kinds of party scenes and stuff that I intentionally stay away from, my willingness to go to the wedding has dwindled for the past few months, especially knowing that for safety I'd have to stay with the party the whole time (about a week).
A few days ago, my fiancé started talking about how we needed to start getting things ready to go with tickets and travel plans, and then noted how unenthusiastic I was being about it, and ended up calling me out on how I was clearly just convincing myself that I NEEDED to go vs actually wanting to go.
He ended up telling me I needed to make a choice about it within a week, because he needed to work on travel plans, and I agreed. I worked through all my anxieties and concerns and reached the conclusion that I shouldn't go after all, since I'll just be in a stressed and panicked state the whole week and won't be able to enjoy myself.
My fiancé and I are going to talk officially about it in a few days, and we're meeting with J and his fiancé this upcoming weekend just to hang out, and while there I'm going to tell them that I'm not coming. I feel like the asshole because they've been really nice to me the few times we've met, these are people my fiancé really cares about and arent going anywhere for the foreseeable future, and I know the whole family will be pretty upset that I'm not coming, especially this soon before the wedding. However, I don't think I'd be able to enjoy myself or properly celebrate them if I went, and would feel like I'm trapping myself in a situation I'm extremely uncomfortable with.
So, WIBTA for my decision?
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justmeinadaze · 25 days
Text
We're A Family Part 24 (Steddie X You)
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A/N: So I am calling this the final part just because it IS the final part of the main story but I'm not done with this little family. I still have a few ideas for them so it won't be the last we see.
Warnings: Dads SteddieX Mom Fem Y/N, SMUT of the passionate tender variety that comes with these three, No real ANGST, Dylan going off to college and the three parents here dealing with that. Some flashbacks of Dylan and the reader struggling with Charlie.
The biggest feels here will come along with anyone who has experienced empty nest syndrome so be aware of that.
FLUFF, The guys talk a lot about how much they love their son and vice versa <3.
Word Count: 4965
Good Neighbors/ We're a Family
Your eyes run along newborn Dylan’s little sleeping face as his tiny hand holds your finger. Charlie had passed out long ago, curled up on the makeshift bed as he softly snored. They could be twins. 
“I’m glad you’re finally here. Your daddy and I have been so excited to meet you.”, you coo in a gentle tone. “I promise, baby, you are going to have the best life. I’ll do anything I can to protect you and make you happy just like my dad did. I wish you could have met him. He would have adored having a grandson.”
Your voice cracks as tears sting your eyes at the thought. Dylan wiggles a bit in your hold as if he was getting more comfortable as his head turned towards your chest. 
Tilting down, you tenderly kiss his forehead and inhale his baby smell. 
“I love you so much.”
***
“Hey, sit your little butt down.”, Eddie teases as he lightly tugs on Aurora’s skirt, ushering her to sit beside him.
“But then I can’t see Dylan!”
“Thankfully the ceremony hasn’t started yet so there’s nothing for you to see.”
Vivian chuckles above him as Ro sticks out her tongue and the metalhead does the same.
“She’s definitely got some personality.”
“Yeah, she gets that from her mother.”, Steve jokes as he shifts James in his lap while the little boy continues to play with the man’s tie. 
You smile his way but quickly focus back on the students in their seats on the lawn a feet away from the bleachers your family was sitting on. Dylan was laughing with his friends around him and occasionally winking at Daisy from her seat down the way. God, he had picked up way too much from Eddie. 
This was a lot harder than you thought it would be. It felt like you were just holding him in arms feeding him a bottle and now suddenly he’s graduating high school. In a week he would be in a completely new state and living his own adult life. 
Why did he have to grow up so fast?
The feeling of fingers brushing your hair behind your ear brought you back to realty before you were being pulled to Steve’s side.
“I know, baby. I know.”
A ringed hand encapsulated your own as Eddie kissed the back of it and didn’t let go till the end of the ceremony. Feeling little hands play with your hair, you tilt your head back to see Brody beaming wide before giggling and kissing your forehead. 
“Yeah, he’s been doing that lately and we can’t figure out why.”, Vivian’s new boyfriend explained as he lifted him onto his lap. 
An accountant, this man was definitely different from Charlie which having been a partner to him as well you understood why she would go down that route. Eddie and Steve liked him even though the metalhead would tease him from time to time when he got a bit too excited when talking about numbers. You and Dylan made sure to remind him that he was the exact same when it came to D&D and he immediately shut up. 
“Ed here used to hug people when he was a toddler. Pure strangers, he would just run to them and give ‘em a hug.”, Wayne chimed in making Steve chuckle at the thought. 
Your mom and Mrs. Harrington weren’t able to make it to the ceremony due to previous commitments they were unable to squeeze out of but Kierra promised to record everything which she did with her phone held high in the air. Wayne and Mrs. Harrington were honestly surprised Dylan wanted them there. 
“They’re my grandparents to. Why wouldn’t I want them there?”
Steve’s mom cried when he told her and Eddie’s uncle turned into the equivalent of goo as he blushed. 
Even after the months that had passed, your son followed through with not having Charlie there, the three of you sitting with him in his room as he made the call. He texted you after asking if it would be ok to swing by at least before he left for college and you told him you were ok with that. 
Everyone quieted down as the principal walked across the stage and began the graduation ceremony.
###########
Your eyes shift between your husband and your four-year-old son as they pick at the food on their plates. Charlie’s fingers moved quickly along his phone and it killed you. You hated that thing and how much time he spent on it. 
“Baby?”
“Hm.”
“Charles.”
“What, Y/N?”, he snaps. 
“Why don’t you put your phone down, huh?”
“I’m talking to my boss.”
“Ok. Can he not wait until after dinner?” When he ignores you, your worried eyes glance towards Dylan whose wide observant ones immediately focused back down on his plate. “Charlie, come on. I’m asking for one hour.”
“Jesus.”, he whines as he slams down his device making you and your son jump. “I’m dealing with a big important thing for work…to make us money…for you and Dylan but sure! Let me put everything on the back burner! How was your day, honey?”
Throwing a scowl his way, you try to ignore his sarcasm but he persists. 
“No, hey. My phones away, let’s talk! No? Ok, hey, Dil. How was your day?!” Without saying a word, your son gets up and runs to his bedroom. “Well that’s great.”
“What do you expect when you talk to him like that? Why is it so hard for you to be here and present with your family?”, you hiss. 
“What the fuck do you want from me, Y/N?! Do you want this fucking roof over your goddamn heads?! That cost money, baby! Whatever. I’m fucking done with this conversation.”
Your jaw tightens as you listen to him get up, grab his jacket, and slam the front door as he leaves. 
***
“Dylan? Weirdo, are you ok?” Your heart breaks when he doesn’t answer, pressing his little face further into his pillow. Sighing, you climb in beside him and run your fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry, baby. Daddy didn’t mean to snap at you like that.”
Rolling over, he wraps his arms around you and you rest your head on his as you hold him tightly. 
“Daddy’s always angry.”
“But never at you, Dylan. He loves you so much.”
“And you?”
“Does daddy love me? Yeah, honey, of course.”
“Den why he so mad all da time?”
You genuinely had no idea how to answer that question as you kissed his forehead. Your brain began to wonder as you thought about what would be best. Divorce popped in occasionally but you immediately shook away the notion. You and Charlie both lost your dads. You didn’t want that for him. 
You can make this work. Maybe there’s something you could do to get the man you fell in love with back so the three of you could be happy. 
***
Dylan excitedly runs in your direction but Aurora and James cut his parents off as they get to him first. The boy effortlessly picks them up with each arm and Steve grins as he takes a picture. 
“I’m free!”
“We’re so proud of you, babe.”, Vivian praises as she kisses his cheek before Brody does the same making your son laugh. 
“Very proud.”, Wayne smiles, thrown off when Dylan places his siblings down and gives the man a hug. Eddie chuckles through his teeth as his uncle lightly smacks his chest before wrapping his arms around the boy. 
“How dare you make me feel old.”, Kierra playfully scolds as she kisses his face. 
“A high school graduate and on your first go around!”, the metalhead jokes as he leans in for a hug. “You’re amazing, kid.”
“I guess I can’t call you ‘little man’ anymore.”, Steve says as he takes the boy in his arms. 
“You still can and you can never stop calling me ‘weirdo’.”, Dylan replies gesturing towards you. 
“You’re always going to be my little weirdo.”
He softly smiles as he bends to embrace you allowing you to circle your arms around his neck as he lifts you off your feet. 
“I love you, mom. Thank you for everything.”
#############
A seven-year-old Dylan clings to your neck as you hold him to you against the wall of the pool at the apartment complex. Eddie insisted he could beat Steve in a race and the former swimmer promptly took the challenge. 
“1! 2! 3! GO!”, your son shouted, giggling as both men splashed water everywhere as they took off. 
“I told you!”, Steve gloated as he beat the metalhead effortlessly. “You went to school with me. You should have known better.”
Eddie pants as he finally reaches the wall beside you.
“Jesus, I need to stop smoking.”
You and Dylan laugh at him as the other boy pulls his body out of the pool and leans down to take the small boy from you. 
“I’m starving. Munson is buying dinner since he sucks—lost—I mean lost.”
Scowling his way, the long-haired man helps you out of the water and wraps a towel around your body. 
When you four make it back to the apartment, Steve sighs as he realizes he has a couple of missed calls. 
“It’s from the store. I just need one minute.”
Dylan’s head hangs as he wraps his towel tighter around him and heads for his bedroom to change. Grabbing his arm, you stop him and move some of the hair that had stuck to his forehead.
“Hey Keith, what’s going on?...You need me to come in…” Eddie’s chocolate eyes watch both of you intensely as you cup your son’s face in your hands. “Ok, well, I’m not free today but if you call Robin she can help today and I can come in tomorrow.”
Your son’s head shot up to look towards Steve as he gave his boss a few more uh huhs before finally turning around and throwing his phone back down on your couch. 
“What?”, he asked when he realized you three were watching him. “What’s wrong, little man? Everything ok?”
“Y-You…you don’t have to leave?”
“No? I’m spending the day with you, bud. Why would I even want to leave?”, he chuckled a bit confused. Tears leave the small boy’s eyes as he runs and practically tackles Steve’s legs. 
“Thank you.”
“Hey. Go change so you can come back and tell Eddie what you want him to buy you.”, you instructed as you tickle his neck with your finger. 
As soon as he disappears, you tackle your arms around his waist and lean your head on his chest.
“Thank you.”
“I’m not quite sure what I did but you’re both welcome.”
Tilting back, you softly press your lips to his. 
“Thank you for being you.”
***
After putting Aurora to bed, you stepped outside on to your back porch where Eddie was already into his second cigarette with a beer in his hand. As you sat beside him on the steps, you scanned him over truly taking in how much he had changed in almost 12 years. He looked incredibly handsome in his button up short sleeve shirt and tie with black slacks that Steve insisted he wear to look more formal. 
He had his hair pulled back for the ceremony but now it was down around his shoulders. As he brought the cigarette to this lips you couldn’t help but admire his wedding band that blended in perfectly with his other rings. 
Visually, he still more or less looked the same with a few new signs of aging in his face and more laugh lines around his eyes but what really shifted was his demeanor. While Eddie always had an air of confidence, he seemed to carry it differently now that he was older. Most of the burdens he held before he no longer had because he was finally genuinely happy. He had everything he could have ever asked for and more. 
Silently, he handed you his half-finished cigarette that you eagerly sucked on as he took a sip from the bottle in his hand.
“What are you thinking about?”, you ask as you lean against the rail beside you. 
“You.”, he smiles. “Steve. Dylan. Ro. James. My family.”
“Anything in particular?”
His lips pout out slightly as he shakes his head and continues looking off towards the lake. 
“When I caught Charlie and Vivian, I remember going off on him and then running out the door. I felt so lost and confused. I didn’t know where to go because I knew if I went home my mom would make me feel bad. I was too embarrassed at the time to go to Kierra’s and I didn’t have any friends I felt comfortable with. I pulled over on the side of the road and sobbed.”
Eddie’s hand reaches out to intertwine with yours making you smile as you glance in the distance was well. You both listened as shoes scooted along the wood, sliding over a chair as Steve exhaled taking a seat. The metalhead lifted his bottle in the air that the other man took and chugged back the remaining liquid. 
“If you had told me then that I would be here in this big house where my two other kids are sleeping after seeing Dylan graduate high school and with two men who are not only fabulous husbands and partners but phenomenal dads to a little boy… who just wanted to be appreciated for who he was…”
The metalhead wiped his eyes as the tears began to flow from them both. 
“I know…you said once that its easier for me to hold it all in when it comes to him but… Y/N, when his principal said ‘Dylan Munson-Harrington’… it all just hit me. All the memories and the fact that he’s leaving in a week. I mean this kid has been with us since the beginning.”
“Since day one.”, Steve added. “Shit. If you had told us the night before that tomorrow I would open the door to a little boy that would change everything… Y/N, growing up the thought of being a dad scared me but it always felt easy with him.”
“He always wanted to learn and asked me constantly to show him how to play my guitar.”, Eddie laughed. “I remember one of our first conversations was when we came over and I hooked up the video game system. I asked him what kind of games he liked and he just lit up, sweetheart. When he told me Charlie never liked the things he did or played with him he made me think of my dad. Allen was the same way and I didn’t want that for him.”
 “And that’s just the beginning. Don’t even get me started on all the other feelings about how he’ll be the first Munson to go to school and get a degree.”, Eddie laughed as he leaned back against Steve’s leg. “I’m so proud of him but I’m really going to fucking miss him.”
“Me to.”
“Me to.”, you add. “Thank you for being you.”
##################
“Dad? Can I ask you something?”, a twelve-year-old Dylan inquires as Eddie starts to walk past his door after putting his sister to bed. 
“Yeah, kid. What’s up?”
“How did you ask a girl out when you were my age?”
“Oof. I had all the girls lined up around the block to date me! Oh, wait, that was Steven.”, he teased making his son laugh. “When I was your age I had this huge crush on a girl in my English class. She was one of the popular kids and I was terrified to say anything. But one day we got paired up for a project and I made her laugh. Just started acting like a total dork and she loved it.”
“So…be funny?”
“I mean, there’s a bit more to it but…” Eddie pauses as he starts to panic, fearful he’s giving the boy the worst advice. “Look, Dylan, my dad wisdom to you? Just be yourself. Steve and I had an ex that was so uptight. She hated that I ‘couldn’t be serious.’ Truth was she didn’t like me for me. Your mom on the other hand loves my nerdy ass and my sense of humor.”
Dylan beams as his dad pulls him in for a hug.
“Can I find out who this girl is? I swear I won’t tell Y/N.”
 “It’s, um, I kind of…really like…Daisy.”
Eddie tries to contain his giddiness at his son’s admission. Steve had called it a long time ago and you had mentioned how cute he seemed to get every time Daisy would come over.
“Dude, come on. She definitely likes you for you. I see you make her laugh all the time and listen to her when she seems upset. You offered to help her with school. You’re a good dude.”
“But what if she only wants to be friends?”
“Then that’s ok to and you know no matter what the three of us will be here with pizza and beer to cure your heartache.”
“Mom won’t let you give me beer!”, Dylan chuckles.
“Meh, you’re right. Ok, Steve and I will sneak you into the bar then.”
***
It was so soft you barely felt it at first, both their lips kissing and sucking on either side of your neck. When your eyes fluttered open, you took in the scene before you. Eddie and Steve were pressed against your sides, their arms thrown over your body as palms rubbed along your tummy and chest. There was a neediness behind their subtle movements that had you whimpering as you arched your head back to allow them more access as their mouths opened wider to run their tongues along your skin. 
Steve was the first to move, placing his body on top of yours and pulling down his boxers enough to free his cock. As he leaned back on his heels to remove his shirt, the metalhead’s lips mingled with your own, his hand cupping your cheek to keep you facing him. After wrapping your legs around his waist, the other man guided himself into your entrance and Eddie mewled as you heavily exhaled at the feeling. 
Steve’s large, soft hand traveled to your breasts, kneading your tits as he rolled his hips at steady pace. When his palm finds your throat, his eyes meet yours and you nod earnestly granting him permission before lightly squeezing it between his fingers. 
Jumping to the side, Eddie hastily removes his clothes, stroking his cock at the sight of you both as he crawls back in beside you. Opening your mouth, now desperate to taste him, he accepts your invitation, moaning loudly as your tongue plays with his tip and your head bobs. 
Slanting his lower half till he was hovering just above you, Steve thrusts into you harder and faster as his own tongue extends out to help you lick his husband’s length. After readjusting himself, the metalhead clung to the other man’s hair as he pumped his dick down his throat causing him to slightly gag and constrict around him while you clung to Steve’s shoulders smothering your moans against his skin. 
It was almost too much as your pussy quivered around him and you came, his palm immediately coming to cover your mouth as he fucked you through your high. Eddie laid back down on his side, tilting his head to kiss the lips of the man he loved as he grunted and his warm release filled you up. 
Taking you in his arms, the long-haired boy maneuvered you around until you were on top of him with your back against his chest. You couldn’t help but shiver against his body as he ran his leaking tip through your dripping folds, grazing your clit and making you whine. 
As soon as his cock entered you, he set an animalistic pace as his dick slammed into your sensitive spot repeatedly. 
“Oh, fu--!”
Eddie’s ring covered hand cut you off, covering your mouth as you started to scream at the sudden feeling of Steve’s tongue flicking your bundle of nerves. Your own hand rested on his as your fingers intertwined with the one he had gripping your stomach. 
The way he groaned in your ear, you knew the pretty boy was altering between you and Eddie as he played with your nub and sucked on the other man’s balls. It drove him wild as he pushed against your back, forcing you to sit up as he grabbed both sides of your hips and guided your movements. 
Steve’s fingers slid into your mouth, hoping to silence you as he continued pleasuring you both. As you neared your climax, it wasn’t enough and Eddie flipped you over so you could shove your face into the pillow and shout as you fell over the ledge. Lying flat against your back, he held your hands as his forehead leaned against your shoulder warming your skin as he panted. 
 Grunts filled your ears and with a few more rough thrusts, he emptied inside of you. 
You laid there quietly until Steve motioned for you both to follow and guided you two in the shower with him. You allowed them to clean you as you watched them carefully, Eddie closing his eyes as he leaned his head back under the hot water and Steve sighing as he pressed his back against the cold tile. 
“I’m proud of you two.” Their heads lifted to look at you as you continued. “He may be the first Munson to go to college but he learned that hard work ethic for you, Eddie. You own your own store and work hard to take care of everyone not just us. Steve, you showed him he could achieve anything he wanted by following your dream and becoming a teacher.”
“My son was always a good kid but because of you two he’s happy. I’m going to miss him but I’m not worried about his future because of everything you both have done for him. I’ll never be able to thank you properly…”
As the tears start to flow arms wrap around you from behind and Steve promptly tugs you both forward as he presses your head to his chest.
“I would hold that thought…we still have two kids left to fuck up.”
You and the man in front of you giggle at Eddie’s comment as the heavy air breaks and you shake your head as you turn around to give him a big hug. 
#############
A six-year-old Dylan smiles up at you from his place in bed as he waits for you to tuck him in. 
A couple of nights ago, Eddie and Steve had come over to spend time with him when his father bailed and that night you three were intimate in their apartment after he had gone to bed. It had been two days since you saw them and you couldn’t stop thinking about them. 
“Mommy? When are we going to hang out wit-wit Eddie and Steve again?”
Softly grinning, you climbed in beside him and he promptly curled up at your side. 
“You liked spending time with them?”
“Yeah! Mom, Eddie is-is-is so funny and Steve said he would play basketball wit me. I love them!”
“Oh my goodness!”, you tease as you pull him close and kiss the top of his head. “Yeah, they were fun to hang out with and they told me that you’re an amazing kid.”
He blushes as you smile, turning off his little lamp as you continue to run your fingers through his hair. 
“Do you like hanging out wit dem?”
“Yeah, baby, I did.”
“Good cause…you seem…different…around dem…”
“Different how, weirdo?”
“Happy.”
***
James and Aurora clung to Dylan’s neck as their dads finished putting the last remaining boxes in the U-Haul. 
“Guys, I’m not going away forever and you know I’ll call you both every day.”
“You promise you’ll come home for Christmas and my birthday?”
“Of course, Ro. Unless you get a boyfriend you’d rather hang out with.”
“I didn’t hear that.”, Steve teases making them laugh. 
“Love you, bra-der.”
“I love you to, kid.”
“Ok, guys we have to let Dylan go.” Your voice cracked as you lightly pulled on your daughter’s curls. “Rara, why don’t you and James go watch some TV and I will make you guys lunch in a minute, ok?”
After giving them one last kiss, he drops them to their feet and both kids wave before running inside the house. He grins down at you as you wrap your arms around him and he holds you tightly. 
“I love you so much.”
“I love you to, mom.”
The sound of the truck clanging shut pulled you both apart as you kissed his cheek and he playfully whined as he lightly pushed you. Both men shuffled slowly around the corner as they waited for their turn to say goodbye. 
Smiling their way, you scooted towards the porch and sat on the steps so they could be alone.
“So, let us know when you get there and that you and Daisy are safe.”
“And if you need anything and I mean anything just give us a call and we’ll fly right over no questions asked.”, Eddie added making Dylan grin. 
“I know you would and that’s why you’re my dads.”, he replied. “I don’t remember a whole lot from their marriage but I do remember my mom was always trying to keep it together. Always carrying this burden that she thought I couldn’t see. The first time I ever saw her genuinely smile was that first time you two came over.”
“Daisy and I have been talking these past couple of weeks and she feels bad about leaving her mom here with her dad. It wasn’t until she said it that I realized, I don’t have that problem because I know she’s safe with you.”
“Jesus Christ, kid.”, Eddie chuckled as he tried to hide the tears that had fallen. “Still the fucking kid spy for the CIA or some shit.” Everyone laughed including you even though you couldn’t hear their conversation. “You’ve always been really smart and so fucking kind. I know you always used to say how much you loved that we listened to you and cared about things you were into but you have no idea how much it meant to me when you did that for me. The way you listened to me babble about D & D and guitar—”
“Hey, now, the guitar is awesome.”
“Yeah it is.”, the metalhead grins. “What I’m trying to say is I was always afraid of becoming Allen but you taught me that as a father and a man I could be like Wayne… I love you, kid, and I’m so fucking proud of you.”
He leans in to give his son a hug and you smile as you picture the small kid that played video games with him 24/7. The young boy that ran into Eddie’s arms after his talent show where he had taught him to play the guitar. The little boy who in his most terrifying moment called the metalhead first to come help him because he felt safe with him. 
“I know I can be a bit overprotective but…”, Steve laughed breathily as they beamed at him. “…Like Ed said, you were such a good kid and I hated, fucking hated, when Charlie would hurt you. No one ever stood up for me when I was growing up. I was always alone in our big house and anytime my dad was an asshole I just kind of absorbed it. I didn’t want that for you…any of you three. I knew I wanted my kids to have a happy home where they felt safe coming to me. Dylan, you were my son before you even started calling me dad. Even if you had decided to keep your last name and kept calling him dad, you would still be our son. I love you to, little man.”
As they embrace and your oldest begins to cry against his shoulder, you see the six-year-old that clung to Steve when he was in the hospital sick with a fever. The small boy who stood down an adult like Mr. Harrington and scolded him for being rude to “his daddy”. The young man who held him tightly as his own biological parent broke his heart and he listened to the man he now saw as his father defend and protect him. 
“Ok, ok. Come on. You have to go. Daisy is waiting for you.” Steve lifts the boys head and wipes his tears with his thumbs as they both grin at him comfortingly. “And you’re right by the way. She is safe with us. Nothing bad is going to happen to Y/N or your siblings, ok?”
Nodding, he gives you one final wave as he hops into the truck and slowly begins driving down the road. 
“Are you ok?”, you ask as you come up behind them. 
“Yeah, sweetheart. You?”
“I’m sure I will be.”
“Yeah…”, Eddie agrees as he pulls your back against his chest and rests his head on your shoulder. “At least I get my guitar room back.”
“Oh really?!”, Steve shouts as the metalhead takes your hand and the three of you head towards your front door. “I thought we all agree I could have an office.”
“Yes, Steven, because grading papers requires a whole room for you.”
“Eddie, stop it.”, you giggle as you push up on your toes to kiss their lips. 
##################
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