#bytebun

[galateagalvanized]

chel those prompts... they are SO GOOD. was very hard to pick, but what about 9? or if that one's a repeat, 19?

Ah, Byte, thank you so much for the prompt!! This one got away from me a bit, but I hope you enjoy it <3 (And welcome to my Stewjon!)

For prompt #19: A spear as a walking stick

So the saying goes

"You know, all this reminds me of an old Stewjoni saying," Obi-Wan says, leaning against their balcony and gazing at the sprawling gardens below. 

"Oh?" 

Cody looks over, curious. Obi-Wan never speaks much of his home planet or its culture; he'd assumed, perhaps foolishly, that Obi-Wan had adopted Coruscant as his home wholesale.

Obi-Wan’s eyes are unreadable when he glances towards Cody. “Yes. It goes: a smart man fears the hidden knife, but a wise man fears the dull one."

Beneath them, the roiling sea of ivy-like plants lies lazy and untamed in the blue-white light of Stewjon’s supergiant of a sun. The garden and the structure that overlooks it have been kept at the barest minimum threshold of livable through the sporadic maintenance of the nomadic trains that, once or twice a solar cycle, eventually make their way here. Cody runs a thumb over the brittle pink sandstone of the stone railing and feels a few pieces brush away as he tries to understand what Obi-Wan is saying. His training had been in information and not metaphor. The war’s problems had been more logistical than literary.

Cody leans over and knocks his shoulder into Obi-Wan’s and attempts to respond in kind. "A dull knife’s not so bad so long as you’re not the one wielding it.”

“Indeed,” Obi-Wan says, as frustratingly non-committal as he was before, and when Cody squints at him for more information, he shakes his head. The gold medallion around his neck swings with the motion and glints strangely in the blue sunlight. Cody has wanted to pick it apart earlier, to hunt for how any voice recording device could survive the sun's erratic emag, but Obi-Wan had waved it off. Cody stares at it, bites back the same urge, and swallows his questions as he runs the words back over in his mind. 

‘A dull knife?’ As much as he hates the Stewjoni tendency towards metaphor and idiom, he has to admit that it’s an effective protection against ever being caught in a lie. How can you find a lie in someone’s words when you can’t even find their meaning?

Wait. “Do you think other Speaker believes he’s doing the right thing? That he’s just—incompetent?"

“I think it’s something we should consider,” Obi-Wan says as a door opens behind them. They turn, as in-sync now as they ever were on the battlefield, and they face the messenger who steps into their rooms as a united front.

“We’re ready for you, Speaker Kenobi,” the man says, and Cody and Obi-Wan step forward together.

—

It’s only the third day of debate, but Cody feels as though they're in the middle of a three-month siege. The air is filled with that same mix of tension, dread, and monotony, although there’s considerably more food.

Stars, he even can’t lean towards Obi-Wan for an explanation like he did that night at the Corellian opera, where the opera house had banned translation devices out of some archaic belief in the inherent beauty of the incomprehensible. Then, Obi-Wan had whispered explanations beneath his breath into the close space between their cramped mezzanine seats, his voice smooth and clever and, honestly, more interesting than the drama playing out a sixty feet away.

Now, Obi-Wan’s the one on stage. And he isn’t alone.

“And why should we continue to pay the Republic’s fees? When Republic protection was the only thing that threatened us?” 

Speaker Catiline’s voice echoes through the open-air auditorium with a gravity and weight that Cody almost envies. It’s a commander’s voice, deep and authoritative, and on the field, it would brook no argument. 

Across the raised platform from him, Obi-Wan brooks an argument.

“Alleged threat,” Obi-Wan corrects, but Catiline shakes his head.

“It is true that a Republic ship entered our airspace and crashed to our surface,” he says. “A ship can be defined as a Republic protection. And regardless of how it got there, that protection killed six men.”

Cody bristles, his back teeth grinding. By that reasoning, the Separatists could have loaded Republic starships into cannons and launched them at the Speaker caravans—and Catiline could still claim the danger came from the Republic.

But he is still, technically, corect. 

“We didn’t need a crashed Republic ship on our roads. We didn’t even need working Republic ships in our skies,” Catiline continues. “The Separatists could not have taken this planet any more than the Republic could not defend it.”

Cody tucks another protest behind his teeth. Unlike on Coruscant, Stewjon’s courts do not forbid speculation. He keeps a careful eye on Obi-Wan’s hands. Other than the Speaker Medallion, he hasn’t changed any part of his wardrobe. His hands flash from beneath the long bells of his sleeves, and Cody calms to see them warm and steady and Obi-Wan speaks.

“Regardless of the planet’s natural protections, you still benefit from protected Republic trade routes,” Obi-Wan says. “And if we are in the business of speculation, Speaker, I might note that the next martial threat to the galaxy may not take the form of an army formed entirely of robots.” He gestures to the murmuring crowd filling the concentric lines of sandstone benches. “Organic armies, as you may remember, have no trouble surviving here.”

“No need to question whether I remember the histories, Kenobi. But it has been two decades since you learned them, has it not? Perhaps we should hold a Telling and see whose memory is sharper.”

Cody leans forward, curious. He’d known that Obi-Wan’s impeccable memory for stories and language stemmed from Stewjoni practices; he hadn’t realized there were competitions for it, though. He wonders—

“My memory is sharp enough to remember what we are debating, Speaker, and I don’t think it was the histories,” Obi-Wan says, and titters of laughter crop up in the crowd like weeds through duracrete. 

“Mm,” Catiline concedes with a nod of his head more gracious than Cody had thought him capable of. “Perhaps. But your armies never studied here, Kenobi. No army has. No modern army could wage war without their droids and datapads, their terminals and their communication arrays. They would be helpless without all of their technological methods of thinking and remembering. So why should we worry?”

It’s the first time Cody’s heard a Stewjoni native acknowledge the disparity between the galaxy’s technology and their own—or, more accurately, their lack of it. The massive blue-tinged sun hangs high in their pale atmosphere, apparently unremarkable beyond its size and color, but Cody knows better. He wonders what the flares look like from the planet’s surface; he wonders if, given enough time, the flares could become predictable. From the corner of his eye, he thinks it gets a smidge brighter, and he wishes he’d checked the shielding on their dropship a fourth time as he turns his attention back to the stage.

“The modern army of today, perhaps not. But the modern army of tomorrow? Of ten, twenty years from today? I don’t think we can rule it out,” Obi-Wan argues. “The cost of that future security is a simple agreement to remain within the Republic. It seems a small cost to me.”

Catiline laughs. Even his laugh is arresting: deep and resonant. “A small cost? Careful, Kenobi. That statement’s up for review on the Medallion, now. How could the cost be small? When it would invite thousands of your clones to make their residence here?”

Cody sits up, senses sharpening, and he sees Obi-Wan mirror the action in lock-step  from twenty feet away.

“If you have a problem with clones—”

“Not with clones,” Catiline interrupts, and an angry murmur at the faux pas stills as he continues. “With men who were bred and born to combat. They can have no other story in their hearts but violence. You can use a spear as a walking stick, Master Kenobi, but that does not change its nature. He is dangerous. They all are."

Even from this distance, Cody can see Obi-Wan bristle. The line of his shoulders could be used to level a foundation, and his eyes flash an electric blue in the strange sunlight. Cody has rarely seen him so angry.

"And a hammer can build as well as break," Obi-Wan snaps. "Do not forget that some people in this galaxy have managed to acquire more than one use, Speaker."

An excited murmur rolls through the crowd, accented by a few soft claps, and a bell sounds for both order and a break in the proceedings. Obi-Wan and Catiline bow to each other, to the crowd, and to each other again before stepping off opposite ends of the stage. Cody makes his way down the amphitheater steps, and he doesn’t think he’s imagining the relief in Obi-Wan’s small smile when he looks up.

“Cody,” Obi-Wan says, as exhausted as he ever lets himself sound, and Cody resists the urge to put a hand in the small of his back to keep him upright. “They’re calling for an hour recess. Would you mind terribly taking lunch in our rooms?”

“I’ll grab it for us now,” Cody says. “You go on up.”

He gives into the urge to rest his fingertips in the shadow between Obi-Wan’s shoulder blades as he walks towards the food, pushing lightly as he goes.

—

Their rooms are light, airy, and in a state of managed-disrepair exactly the same as the outer balcony. The sheets are fresh, though, and the pallet is clean of bugs even if it is on the floor, so Cody can’t complain. Obi-Wan is sitting cross-legged on the bed closest to the window when Cody elbows his way through the curtain that separates their rooms from the rest of the hall.

“Hey,” he says softly, careful not to spill food or drink as he makes his way over. Obi-Wan must already know that he’s here, but some meditation states are harder to cleanly withdraw from than others. He wants to give Obi-Wan as much space as he can. “You ok?”

“Perfectly fine.” 

Cody wonders if that particular lie will be caught by the council reviewing the Medallion records. If the Jedi Council never caught on, though, he doesn’t have high hopes for Stewjon’s.

Obi-Wan opens his eyes slowly, then shakes his head when he sees the monochrome assortment of square flatbreads, jerky, and small red berries on the plates. “Ah. I’d forgotten how much I didn’t miss the food here.”

Cody grins and tears into a piece of bread. 

“I don’t mind,” he says. “I’m still getting used to food that hasn’t been cranked out of a nutritional vat and baked into a square. It’s nice to get back to my former definition of a square meal.”

Obi-Wan’s answering laugh bounces from the sandstone walls towards the open window and its waving, gauzy curtains. They eat in silence for a few long minutes, both of them still accustomed to the battlefield routine of inhaling as much food as possible before the next alarm or crisis sounds. 

When they’ve both finished, Obi-Wan sits back, and Cody meets his eyes with as much steady calm as he can muster. Obi-Wan draws on the air of Jedi sage as surely and obviously as Cody straps on his plastoid armor.

“Cody… I must apologize for my words earlier,” Obi-Wan says, holding Cody’s gaze. “I hope you don't mind my equating any of you to tools. Relating any of you to objects is to make a shoddy metaphor. All of you are far more than—than your ability to serve a purpose.”

Ah. Ah. Cody is the one who has to struggle not to look away, now. It’s something that Obi-Wan has told him before, but he has never understood it. As much as he wants to believe Obi-Wan, he understands Catiline’s viewpoint more than Obi-Wan’s. The war is over; the clones are struggling to find their place in peacetime. They, all of them, are desperately looking for a purpose to serve. 

Cody is grateful beyond words that his own purpose survived the war.

“It’s fine,” Cody says. He remembers Obi-Wan’s earlier warning about Catiline’s motives, and he wonders, for a brief second, if Catiline really would be doing the right thing by keeping the clones off Stewjon. The clones were at least half the war, and the war never came here. Maybe it’d be best if it never did.

As if he catches the tail end of that thought, Obi-Wan shakes his head. The kindness in Obi-Wan’s eyes, as clear and impenetrable as well water, drives Cody to glance down at the food between them. He won’t argue, he thinks. It isn’t an argument worth winning.

But Obi-Wan’s warm, scarred hands reach for his, and Cody looks up again.

“You know what the Medallion means,” Obi-Wan says, and Cody nods. It’s one more thing he knows but doesn’t understand. “You know I’m not lying. So then, believe me—Cody, you must believe me—that you have far more than violence in your soul. You can be a spear and a walking stick and a hammer, and even if you were none of those things, I would still want you with me. I would want you with me even if you served no other purpose than being in my life.”

The words slide, hot and too heavy, into Cody’s throat and stick there. He can’t swallow past them; he can’t swallow them. The Medallion gleams green-gold in the sun. They are, in a word, unmaking. Impossible to believe, and impossible to refute. 

Catiline’s words ring in Cody’s head, pounding to the rhythm of a new headache. He’d said his piece while wearing a Speaker Medallion too.

Obi-Wan squeezes Cody’s hands. “Okay?”

And Cody marshals himself as he once marshaled armies, and he tucks the wildfire inferno of his emotions and protests back behind the safe haven of his ribcage. He isn’t a Speaker, he thinks. He has no Medallion. No one’s listening for his lies.

“Okay,” he says, and the noon bell tolls.

------

Thank you again for the prompt; I hope you enjoyed it!

#codywan #prompt fills #bytebun #tcw fic #commander cody #obi wan #am writing #my fic #i have plans for Stewjon and Catyline that would take about 25k to write #and i'm THINKING about it!! i'm thinking about it! #so who knows hahaha #maybe i'll write more #explain what i'm talking about in this strange new world #;) wink wonk #until then everyone look up luminous blue variable stars!! #how NEAT #cheers! #my works

[notquiteaghost]

@bytebun reblogged your post

#Oh fuckkk #maybe I should get into #blaseball #fanart #Uh. At least I think it’s blaseball

[vibrating a normal amount] hi yes hello this IS blaseball but it is short circuits which is a kind of blaseball we may not ever get again

cuz like. blaseball has seasons, right? in the sports sense. a year of gameplay. except in blaseball seasons only last a week, with monday thru friday being the actual season & saturday being the post-season championship & then sunday is elections. because blaseball does not rest, games start at the top of the hour every hour from monday morning to friday evening

and then also blaseball was developed like. oh there's a word for this i can't think of it. continuously, yknow? features added as time passed. this was also relevant to The Plot but basically, from season one through to season twenty four, stuff just got Added, almost nothing was changed. once we got it we had it unless we the fans took it away again.

so after season twenty four, blaseball is starting again fresh (we are coming out of beta!!), so the devs wanted to experiment with different features before Actually starting again, so: short circuits! little pocket universes that only last two seasons, with various different mechanics. in a meta sense, to get community feedback on said mechanics. in a plot sense, Oh Christ These Blaseball Players Only Live For Two Seasons, because we all got real damn attached to the players from the original universe(s) & the devs didn't want to kill anyone off in '''plot irrelevant''' mechanics testing, so for each circuit we got all-new players.

i did not actually watch any short circuits cuz i didnt have room in my brain for short lived mechanics but. blaseball IS back soon!!!! september at the earliest we do not have A Date yet but. Soon. you will know i will yell

#yelling at clouds #blaseball #bytebun #i dont really have enough coherency tonight for a blaseball infodump but i did my best #short circuits is really like. speedrun tragedy. #idk if we actually know for sure circuit players are Dead or just like. we left them. #we probably killed SOME of them seeing as we. fed? them to the microphone? #also whether or not anyone can die at all in blaseball is a whole thing. Blaseball Is A Horror Game. #anyway if this is all fucking incomprehensible........ it is easier to get into blaseball by watching it ime #which is currently impossible so. yknow. When It Returns.

[willowcrowned]

sunny d… and georg (qui-gon specific)

yeah that’s fair

#love that you agree I’m insane but JUST about qui gon #i keep telling people that #they don’t believe me #ask game replies #bytebun

[bytebun]

found family coworkers (definition multiple) of all time [image description under cut]

Comic 1:

First panel, Ingo and Akari are standing together. Someone off-screen asks “oh, is that your dad?”. Akari has an awkward smile and replies “oh, no no. he’s my...” There’s a long pause as she looks at Ingo. He’s leaving it up to her. She finishes, “He’s my coworker... friend... guy.” In smaller font, she continues “yea. that.” Comic 2: A dramatic panel of Volo, looking pissed off, shouting “who are you to interfere?!!” Ingo tugs the brim of his cap lower. The upper half of his face is in shadow, while his eyes stand out. He looks threatening but has his expression is his characteristic neutral-frown, and he says “...I’m her coworker friend guy.”. In the final panel, Machoke is throwing an incredible amount of punches, a reference to Star Platinum from Jojo. Ingo is pointing with one hand, his battle pose. The background text reads, “What does that even mean??” Volo is experiencing off-screen violence.

Comic 3: The comic is titled “Reunion”. In the first panel, Ingo shows off Akari, with a faint smile on his face. She is labelled “best girl (assigned by god)”. He says, “Emmet, this is Akari, my coworker. She’s the reason I was able to return to this station.” In smaller font, Akari comments to herself, “ooh... so this is the man in white.”

In the second panel, in smaller font Ingo notes “I think I remember now...” He says, “Akari, this is Emmet. He's also my coworker.” Coworker is underlined. Emmet is crying in the background, looking confused, conflicted, distressed, and happy. He says, “Brother...?” In the final panel, we see a framed photograph of all three together. Underneath are the words, Employee of the Month. Akari is dressed as a depot agent, and she and Ingo pose with peace signs. Emmet is red faced from crying, but he’s smiling widely. He looks happy.

#pokemon arceus legends #submas #akari #ingo #pla #comics #bytebun draws #your long lost presumed dead brother shows up with a teenager and introduces you as his coworker wwyd #i'm really pushing the platonic ride or die coworkers dynamic for these two. my agenda #making shitty comics is so much more fun than making nice comics i don't have to worry about panel sizes and shit #yeah it's a jojo reference U_U i was drawing that second panel like wait... this looks like sugim*to g*lden k*muy #and you know who he looks like...? starts with a j #my hand remembers this shape of character #originally it was going to be ingo suplexing the guy. but that's a complicated pose... #messed up the tag... #pokemon legends arceus

[coruscantguard]

ONLY BY SURVIVING THE WAR WILL YOU PREVAIL

a web weave about the coruscant guard

Aeschylus: The Oresteia, Aeschylus || Darth Vader (2017) 10 || S6 EP7 "Crisis at The Heart" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || Maurice Sendak (2011 interview with Terry Gross) || S1 EP1 "Ambush" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || S1 EP22 "Hostage Crisis" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || S6 EP4 "Orders" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || It, Stephen King || S6 EP4 "Orders" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || S1 EP1 "Ambush" (Star Wars: The Clone Wars) || Tim Riggins Speaks of Waterfalls, Nico Alvarado || Star Wars: Revenge of The Sith, George Lucas || observer's effect, @bytebun

#coruscant guard #commander fox #commander thorn #commander thire #the clone wars #tcw #web weaving #star wars: the clone wars #btw bytebun feel free to shoot me a message if you want me to take the quote from your fic out! #i love it so much that quote destroyed me but i can totally understand it if you'd rather not have it in #anyway uhhhh what else #tumblr user coruscantguard is FINALLY living up to their name! #have emotions with me everyone

[yellowocaballero]

The actual problem I'm having writing Kim Dokja is that I know KDJs here, on Tumblr.com. This website has thousands of people whose sole link to sanity is badly written media and their overly masculine and emotionally repressed comfort character. KDJ as a person is bugfuck insane but he is not as bugfuck insane as everybody on here putting their blorbos in jam jars and shaking them or sticking them into a blender. To be remotely representative of the KDJs in the real world you would have to make him so insane that he goes beyond his unhinged canon nature and straight into serial killer using cutsey talk category. It's unsustainable. KDJ is the voice of the people but the people's voices could call YJH a meow meow and make fancams of him in a fight.

#omniscient reader's viewpoint #orv #kim dokja #kdj #yjh #joke partially stolen from bytebun thank you #the solution to this is to obviously just write KDJ as he's presented in story and not #as if he was actually on tumblr.com or something #but counterpoint: that's less funny #also i have a vision.

[charterandbarter]

a (spoiler-free!) summary of one reader's journey through The Ending of Han Sooyoung, by yellow_caballero (@yellowocaballero)

Richard Siken, War of the Foxes // Quotes: Homestuck, TV Tropes // Andrew Hussie, Homestuck, Act 5 Act 1 // unknown (original webweave linked) // Philippe Besson, Lie With Me // Richard Siken, Litany in Which Certain Things are Crossed Out // Catherynne M. Valente, What the Dragon Said: a Love Story // Anis Mojgani, For Those Who Can Still Ride In An Airplane For The First Time (aka Quentin) // singNsong, Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint, Chapter 377, Ep. 72 // Jeanette Winterson, Lighthousekeeping // singNsong, Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint, Chapter 94, Ep. 19 all other quotes were taken from various chapters of The Ending of Han Sooyoung

#orv #omniscient readers viewpoint #orv spoilers #in a fashion. spoilers for the canon but not for the fic! #orv fic #fanfic rec #for a dear friend! thank you meg #this fic is an absolute blast i would highly recommend it if you are an orv fan #special shout out to bytebun for supplying and test reading! first webweave hehe #this is for every online friend ever! #love you all #also due to timezones: happy birthday hsy!

[other-peoples-coats]

for the wip ask meme if you haven't gotten these already!! 3 in the shadow of men (mp jango) + at the crossroads a second time (99 problems)?

for the wip title ask meme

<3 <3 I have not bud and also it is very funny to me that you specifically would ask for those two titles because:

3 in the shadow of men (mp jango) is the planned 3rd fic in the murderpuppy series (intended posting chronology; in universe, it mostly falls 2nd, between the [redacted] fic and ghost at the back of your closet), and it is all about...well, jango. and what jango's up to, and what he's doing in the murderpuppy verse, and why he goes from GONNA GET A GOOD GRADE AT KILLING JEDI 😎😁😎😎 to I Think I Will Cause Problems On Purpose🗡️🤬🗡️, ft some of the years between baby-wan's no-good-very-bad-trip-to-bandomeer and running into Bail in a gang cell.

teeny tiny snippet 1:

It's a mistake. The kid's fast, shockingly, brutally fast, whipping around like a viper and snapping at the guard, teeth closing over his fingers like a durasteel trap snapping shut. Immediately, the guard bellows in pain, yanking his hand back, and Jango's impressed to realise the kid had bitten clean through the guard's fingers.

and

at the crossroads a second time (99 problems) is the "canon" divergent au of btmybw, where at a point post-melidaan but pre-mandalore, Dooku is declared KIA, qui-gon ends up obi-wan's master, and the two of them...well, kind of go full paranoia once Qui-gon's clued in that hey shit's Fucked. teeny tiny snippet 2:

Which means that it is perfectly reasonable for Qui-gon to spend two days attempting to get the issue sorted out, being that the next time he and his former Master are in Temple at the same time might not be for years. Force willing. In the end, the solution is a convoluted, utterly asinine seeming work around that the archivists on duty — not Madame Nu; he had learnt his lesson as a Junior Padawan about approaching any Jedi his Master counted as friends and expecting anything discussed to remain unremarked upon — assure him will only be a temporary thing, something that will slip off the affected records as soon as they're all updated.

#bytebuns words #coats chats #wip title ask meme #ask memes #btmybw #murderpuppy fic #yes there is a reason for the very specific timing of 99 problems but :) spoilers #there is....uh four ish planned murderpuppy fics? maybe five. #plus maybe a collecion of tiny side drabbles etc. like what he fuck dooku's deal in chpt 2 was. etc

[mhadadmightzine]

🌻 Successor: A DadMight Anthology Contributors 🌻

We are here!! To announce our spectacular Successor-contributors! (Who’ve been hard at work stockpiling the fatherhood into the legacy quirk)!

🎶 Sound On 🔊 Stills & socials below!

🌻WRITERS: @aconstantstateofbladerunner, @dazais-guardian-angel, @eliza-dearest, @krisingtons, onierokinetic, @owlf45, @prairiemule, SilveRanger, starryroyalty, Zyla_SweetBean

🌻PAGE ARTISTS: @alartriss, @anaartsanddraws, @asterlizard, @bytebun, @mickilljoy, @microrockets, @crosshatchedaces, @cyber-phobia, digital_5am, @ammeja, @evelyn-art-05, Finiorian, SmirkSmurk, @elfbingo, @loritoart, @ex-n1hilo, @ititheteavillain, @the19thduckpotato

🌻COMIC ARTISTS: @2000dragonarmy, @iownfish, @ravenatural-art, @tododoodles

🌻MERCH ARTISTS: joikzo, Kai_QS, @lykaioh, @myaire21, Savannah Jenss, @toxic--jpg

A mighty special thanks to Chimy for the heartwarming DadMight animatic at the beginning of the video!

#dadmight #bnha #midoriya izuku #yagi toshinori #all might #mhadadmightzine #mha #boku no hero academia #bnha fanzine #dad might

[thecodywanzine]

ANOTHER PRODUCTION UPDATE!!

The Die-Cut Stickers and Sticker Sheets have been delivered!! They are nothing short of stunning!

Stay tuned for more production updates!!

Shout out to our talented merch artists @bytebun @eneriis @ninjigma and @benjirobi!!

#codywan #commander cody #obi wan kenobi #thecodywanzine #star wars #the clone wars #star wars zine #clone commander cody #cc 2224 #general kenobi #ben kenobi #star wars fandom #star wars fanart #star wars fanfiction

[phoenixyfriend]

A discord was discussing how modern AUs are always so... normal. And I got distracted, because my favorite "we are SO normal [is not normal at all]" ship is Anidala.

I feel like Anakin and Padme can pretend at normal in a modern AU but it's all a Mr. And Mrs. Smith kind of playacting where they are both pretending to be So Normal they are like 1950s ready-to-be-a-nuclear-family newlyweds they are SO NORMAL and then you take one wrong look and WHOOPS their basement is full of spy tech and like. Grenades.

"I'm going to get a good grade in being a suburban housewife, something that is both normal to want and possible to achieve."

- hitman Padme, probably

And then @bytebun said "i have no seen wandavision but based solely on the trailer. vaderkin play-acting that kinda normal"

and I lost my mind for a little because. Yes.

I just love unfathomably weird child celebrity Padme and slave-turned-warrior-monk Anakin and their attempts to be Suburbanite Young Parents.

For this to work for me, I need to insist that Padme is completely cognizant and has her free will, she's just really weird. None of that "Anakin mind-controlled her into loving him" shit here, she's just as weird as he is.

Padme means her smile she is so chill she is so excited to be invited to the neighborhood potluck she made her SPECIALTY BREAD.

She is going to have NORMAL PERSON CONVERSATIONS about things that are NOT GUNS or HOW TO TRACK DOWN TAX EVASION IN THE MAFIA.

Byte:

"Oh, Mrs. Amidala, what does your husband do for work?"

"…security."

They are. So normal. They promise.

i am also thinking abt non-vader au this playing out on like tatooine. or just no-order66 and they are politely asked to move out of the penthouse because there have been an uptick in attempted assassinations & it's making the other senators rlly nervous

anakin gets a Reputation as the guy you go to if your engine won't turn over or if you have a Plumbing Incident

he's out here talking to all the middle-aged guys building their patios & he's soooooo excited about it. he wants to help choose the colours. he's ALSO extremely in with the auntie gossip abt marriages

he's like very well-loved actually maybe padme is even a little jealous ajsdlkfds;flk but sometimes he gets this... look. and he seems to know too much, about things you've never mentioned

They get a reputation for being weird and odd but like in a nice and fun way. They are absolutely not normal but it's a different kind of not normal than the truth.

One of the local moms tries to armchair psychiatry them.

Is it a modern au? Does Anakin have superpowers or is he just a spy with ADHD? Is it just Witness Protection: Naboo? Who knows! They are SO normal.

what's that my boy has autism but he sure can grill post. kinda like that. except it's my boy is a bit eldritch sometime but he sure can home depot

i think padme is like almost a little too put-together to get along with the other moms…. they get like nervous

(she remedies this by making mistakes on purpose & follows up by talking abt luke & leia)

Padme lives her life like an instagram mom.

There's a Major Attack of some sort and suddenly Padme is shooting things and Anakin is shepherding people into his basement because It's The Only One That Can Withstand A Bomb and everyone is just like. Oh. Okay. What the fuck.

SO normal. different story abt the prosthetic hand each time, also.

when people are too perfect. ur like. [sweats]

Anakin accidentally manages to convince everyone that he escaped a cult. This is not true. But he can't explain the truth so he just asks them not to talk about it.

I just

I need them to be weird but in a way where they are CONVINCED they are so normal, guys.

They are doing so well at pretending to be Regular Citizens. (They are not.)

The fandom is just lacking in Anidala fics that let them be weird as fuck for comedy purposes.

#anidala #anakin skywalker #padme amidala #modern au #sorta #wandavision #crossovers #also kinda #phoenix posts #star wars

[lazuliquetzal]

thanks @bobafett for the tag i love tag games SO much

How many works do you have on AO3? 38! Huh! I don't know what I expected? (If you wanna be exact, it's actually 41 because I have 3 joke fics posted anonymously.)

What’s your total AO3 word count? 653,468

What fandoms do you write for? Whatever I'm into at the moment? Right now it's God of War. Earlier it was Linked Universe. Before that it was Daiya no Ace. But I'm not particularly loyal, it's literally just whatever idea that manages to stick.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Reflection -- a classic AA Batteries -- my beloved Dawn of the Fourth -- *evil cackling* ain't no rest for the wicked -- oh my god do people still click on this Denial and Deterioration -- I SWEAR I'M STILL WORKING ON IT I ACTUALLY ADDED TO THE DOC LIKE 3 DAYS AGO

Do you respond to comments? I try to! I try to catch every comment, but if a fic is on the older side and the comment isn't super long, I sometimes don't reply. Not because I don't like the comment (i love all comments i love you all) but because if a fic is not fresh in my brain I don't have much to say

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? DO NOT READ IT, but it's the shadows we cast. I was fifteen. I'm not linking it on here. It's still on my AO3 because I'm not a coward, but I'm also not very brave, so like, don't read my high school fic, you've been warned.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Candid? That one is SUPER fluffy, which is not normally my style, but you know, sometimes you just gotta flex your fluff muscles,

Do you get hate on fics? Eh, not really. I've gotten a few negative comments, but mostly from FFN, and I honestly don't even count those lol.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? No. I genuinely wouldn't even know where to begin.

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Nah, crossovers aren't my thing.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? I have seen a fic that was very blatantly referencing one of mine, but I don't really consider that stealing.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Does the absolutely insane crack fic written on the tail end of a 29-hour voice call count?

What’s your all time favorite ship? Hmm. I read a lot of Merthur, but that's mostly because the Merlin fandom tends to be really good, and therefore there's a lot of good Merthur (although I do like Merthur a lot, super Shakespearean, only valid soulmate pairing I've ever seen).

What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? If I abandon a fic, I'm going to make an announcement. If I haven't officially abandoned it, it's still fair game. That said, Replication is like, on the lowest of low priorities.

What are your writing strengths? It comes with absorbing plot structure into your personality, but yeah, I'm a kick ass plotter. Also comedy. That also comes with the plot structure.

What are your writing weaknesses? Atmosphere/description. Worldbuilding. Also to a lesser extent, character voice -- I feel like I eventually default to everyone just sounding like me

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? Depends on context, but it's always through the lens of "how does this effect the experience for the reader?"

First fandom you wrote for? I wrote a Star Wars fanfic when I was like, 9. First fanfiction on PURPOSE was for PJO.

Favorite fic you’ve written? I think the best thing I've written so far is DotF, but my favorite is probably The Disappearance of Narumiya Mei. WHICH I'M ALSO STILL WORKING ON, life just got REALLY WEIRD and I had to take a step back from it RIP

Tagging @tavina-writes, @ellie-tarts, @lieutenantbiscute, @aoryuucchi, @bytebun, @mimbotomy (no pressure if you don't want to!) and of course anyone who feels like doing this

#lazuli talks #i started writing disappearance for the Fun and then suddenly i had a bit of an irl love life which terrified me into putting it down #i have so many feelings about aroace narumiya mei it's so insane actually #this is definitely a case of 'lazuli in her echo chamber' but the fact that the widespread fanon of narumiya mei is NOT aroace offends me #do you see my vision #re: candid -- it's a very excellent textbook example of sports anime fluff #it is the middle slider of sports anime fluff. you can tell i edited it to be the middle slider of sports anime fluff bc it is exactly 10K #re: the insane 29 hour voice call crack fic #you can ask me about it. i won't be able to say anything though. #re: the anonymous joke fics. one was for april fools and the other was the greatest prank i've ever pulled off #solar if you're ever reading this i love you

[notquiteaghost]

character opinion meme: Cody & murderbot

cody:

it's actually like half of what i like abt him isn't technically canon because i maintain "spin kicks droids" and the little "yes cody you can join in" s7 moment can be reasonably extrapolated to Insane Bastard Man. i can show my working here!! im Right!!

didn't get enough screentime goes hand in hand with wasted potential and is my official criticism of every tcw episode he isnt in because, listen: what if he was. what if he was! let him be meaningfully in charge of shit and also bite people!

in conclusion. absolute favourite sw character love of my life sometimes i stop reading fic because he isn't there and what's even the point

MB:

i love when a character is autistically repressed and refuses to admit they have feelings. just for me! love a character you can crack open like an egg. szpd rights

#asks #bytebun #ty!!

[willowcrowned]

one mutual’s reblog with tags is worth ten thousand notes

#bytebun. that post has 10k in my heart too. bc of you #tunglr

[bytebun]

my piece for @thecodywanzine! thanks to the mods who let me go completely ham and cheese on this bad boy. this one's about living longer than you ever expected and not knowing what to do with it

#they're having a leftover sale with free shipping if you want a ridiculous amount of art and merch for an insanely low price #codywan #commander cody #obi-wan kenobi #star wars #comics #codywan zine #i went kinda nuts with the sun symbolism on this one. even i feel like its hamfisted but like listen am i not going to self-indulge #if not in a shipping zine piece then where #hope and love and the sun and etc can be an. omelette. spanish omelette specifically. that you share with your fambly #food cw #its also about looking at your best friend over a table and going. i lvoe you. i love you. i want to spend the rest of my life with you #i want to see the future with you. im so glad we're both alive even though i thought we'd both be dead by now #bytebun draws #lets not talk about the way there is zero consistency in my art style. <3

[coruscantguard]

coruscantguard's Fic Rec List (01)

This list contains some of my favorite fics from my time in the Star Wars fandom! It is by no means a comprehensive list of all my favorite fics, just the ones I could find the very easiest— I'm absolutely planning on making more of these in the future. I hope you enjoy! (No, I'm not procrastinating working on anything rn, shushhhhhh)

[[MORE]]

we stand here, together by @nightdotlight

21k, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker, Rex & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker, Neyo/Mace Windu

Summary:

Master Depa Billaba and Padawan Caleb Dume. Windu worries for them, out in the wider galaxy. Waging war, while he and Anakin sit here, waiting. But he trained Billaba, and Billaba is training Dume. Anakin once took lessons from her, when he himself was a Padawan, and he knows she is skilled enough by far, to ensure that both she and her student make it back to Coruscant safely. It’s ironic, that when cut off from the Force he can understand other people better than he has in years.

Nat, will you ever shut up about we stand here, together? No, no I will not. It's been three years since this fic was posted, and it still destroys me emotionally every time I read it in the best way possible. You want a fic to make you cry about the Jedi? I've got a fic that will make you cry about the Jedi in the best way possible. This story is wonderful and amazing and I'll probably be recommending it until the end of time.

Reputations. by @outpastthemoat

36k, Qui-Gon Jinn & Obi-Wan Kenobi

Summary:

Defeating a Sith Lord before losing your Padawan braid, that’s a difficult reputation to live up to.

SUCH a wonderful look into Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, this fic completely blew me away. The metaphors here are beautiful, the imagery is stunning, and I love how outpastthemoat portrays the Jedi. An all around treat to read, and a fic I've reread many times, and plan to reread many more.

observer's effect by @bytebun

6k, Cody & Obi-Wan, Cody & Rex

Summary:

The fall of the Jedi was a fixed point, and there had to be a hand on the gun. It might as well be Cody’s.

(The story of your life is a tragedy, but you still get to make your choices.)

This fic contains one of my favorite lines of all time regarding the clones and their names, oh my god. I love the differing approaches it takes to Order 66, I love how the relationship between the 212th and Obi-Wan is portrayed, and the prose just blows me away. I enjoy reading this one SO MUCH.

the falling man by @cabezadeperro

35k, Fox/Quinlan Vos, Fox/Echo

Summary:

It's been three years since the end of the war. Fox works nights as a bouncer in an Underworld nightclub and does what he can to help in the fight against the Empire. He wasn't expecting Echo.

I sobbed when reading chapters of this, y'all. As in, full out ugly crying sobbed. I remember it very clearly, because I was actually on vacation at the time, and I was hiding in my Grandmother's basement so I didn't have to explain to my family why I was sobbing. Post Order 66 stories just get to me in a way that few other stories do, and this one did so perfectly. The despair and the hope mixed together, the way that they just kept going, the SW cyberpunk setting— it just works PERFECTLY.

Twilight on Owl Creek Bridge by @yellowocaballero

33k, Fox & Leia Organa

Summary:

SUBJECT: Regarding Senate Guard Objectives For Today This is a polite reminder to all guardsmen that patrol schedules for the Senate vote ratifying dictatorships are posted in the breakroom. I am also issuing a warning to linear time that days should follow sequentially and are not intended to repeat. Please cease repeating. I am getting a headache. Additionally, I'd like to remind all guardsmen that it is illegal to harbor invisible women in the Senate. If you see a ghost claiming to be Leia Organa, please remove her from the premises. She will be making a scene. Thank you for your cooperation in preserving the peace of the Republic, and all hail the Empire. FOX

This fic? This fic blew me away. Holy shit. This is one of those stories that simply altered me as a human being, you know? Every part of this story is expertly done, and I love how it all came together at the end. This story also contains some of my favorite lines of all time regarding the clones, and god, Leia's portrayal here is PERFECT. Feeling so many emotions about Alderrann again.

may you inherit his light by @notbecauseofvictories

2k, Leia Organa & Bail Organa, Leia Organa & Anakin Skywalker

Summary:

When your father dies, say the Coruscanti, you are left clutching a star map for a different galaxy.

In this, as in many things, Leia is her fathers' daughter.

Speaking of feeling emotions about Alderrann, here's another fic that does that! Leia and Bail will always make me emotional, and this fic does so perfectly. I love their relationship, I love how Leia's grief is portrayed, I love every moment of her life we see and the visual imagery here simply blows me away.

So Call It Grace by @blackkatmagic

10k, Cody/Quinlan Vos, Quinlan Vos & Lando Calrissian

Summary:

The only thing Quinlan wants is to keep his head down and avoid the Empire. Lando dragging one trouble and then another into his life isn't helping matters much.

This fic owns my entire heart and then some. Oh my god. Quinlan & Lando are such a great duo, and Cody!!! Cody!!!! I have no words, just sounds of joy about Cody. This story just took residence in my mind, and has refused to leave, which I am absolutely more than happy with, because I love this story SO MUCH. Quinlan is one of my favorite characters of all time, to the surprise of no one, and I adore how Kat writes him.

Carrion by callmelyss

2k, Merrin/Trilla Sunduri

Summary:

Understanding thrills through the Second Sister—what Cal Kestis has awoken here by chance, what’s slumbered among the unquiet dead, waiting. A survivor. The taste of metal floods her mouth; her gloves creak as her hands clench. Laughter escapes her, flat and humorless and long, ricocheting along the close walls. “No,” she swears, allowing the venom into her voice, the hate to curdle in the air, met and devoured, as it always is, by the Dark. “Not a Jedi. Look closer.” The Second Sister goes to Dathomir in search of Cal Kestis. She finds something entirely unexpected.

These two? These two are AMAZING together. I love the writing here, the visual imagery blows me away, and the way these two relate to each other is AMAZING. The parallels here amaze me, and this is a frequent reread for me, it's just so good. This story makes me want to write about these two SO BADLY.

dead dog (bye-bye baby blue) by @patchmates

15k, WIP, Fox & Cody, Fox & Thorn, Fox & Quinlan Vos, Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi

Summary:

The way it happens is simple: at some point during your service in the Guard, you’ll lose time. The thing wiping the Guards’ memories gets sloppy and Fox remembers the order not to let Fives leave the surface alive. It changes everything and nothing at all.

I am intrigued by this fic, y'all, I am so intrigued. This is a story that I can tell is going to absolutely crack my heart in two, but goddamn am I excited for it to do so. I'm always a huge fan of when people take a more cyberpunk approach to SW, and I am simply fascinated by patchmates' portrayals of the clones. I foresee this fic doing great emotional damage to me, but like, in the best way possible, and recommend it VERY highly.