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#chess don't mind me just actually putting this on my blog
gtgbabie0 · 9 months
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-Spencer Reid x reader
{Bored one night you and Spencer play a game of chess}
Just a little something! Hope you enjoy lovelies💕
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Spencer doesn’t know if he’s losing his mind or if you’ve been secretly hiding the fact you’re a chess prodigy for the entirety of your relationship, but he knows for a fact that there are pieces missing from the bored, which definitely shouldn’t be missing.
He starts to question whether he taught you some kind of amazing strategy that he doesn’t even know about. But there’s something about the way you hide your smile in the palm of your hand that tells him otherwise. “Where’d my knight go?” He presses, leaning forward with a frown as he studies your face.
“What do you mean ‘where’d my knight go?’ I took it from you a second ago” you tell him biting back the smirk that teeters on your lips.
It takes a lot of self-control to not burst into a fit of giggles when he shakes his head, the slight confusion that contorts his face is much funnier than it should be. Spencer runs his hand through his hair as he tilts his head to the side, looking to see if you’re hiding any pieces and surprisingly he doesn’t catch onto the small stash you have going on, wooden pieces digging into your thigh from where you've squashed them between your leg and the sofa.
“No you- you took a pawn that isn’t- I still had both my knights” he huffs more so talking to himself than to you. Spencer ponders for a moment, his chin resting against his palm as his tongue darts out to the corner of his mouth, still thinking.
“I went to the bathroom for no less than a minute, and you’ve stolen half the board” he says, his hand grasping your knee softly as pushes your leg to the side. “You think I wouldn’t notice?” He lets out a humorous chuckle as the wooden knights and a rook, along with a couple of pawns fall from their place mashed between your thigh and the couch.
“Did you forget? I have an eidetic memory angel” There’s an almost prideful expression that flashes through his sweet smile and you can’t help but giggle, a certain warmth blooming through your chest.
“Okay, but I had you for a second didn’t I?” You take his hand in your own, smoothing your thumb across his knuckles as he looks at you with those love-sick eyes of his.
You lean forward slightly trying to distract him as you take his queen, whispering a sly, 'I win' as you wiggle the wooden chess piece in front of his soft eyes, which soon changes when he rolls them with a huff.
Spencer takes the piece from your fingers, "You had me, but you're a terrible liar" he whispers, pressing a delicate kiss to your cheek.
"Hmm, am I a terrible lair or are you just a ridiculously good profiler?" you push the hair that frames his face, moving it from his eyes as you tuck it gently behind his ear.
He lets out an almost shaky sigh as you press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, "Both, probably" he chuckles watching as you put the wooden pieces back in their rightful places, "But you really are a bad liar- you always bite the inside of your lip or you get this smile and-" you don't let him finish the sentence, covering his mouth with your hand with a quiet 'Yeah, yeah alright'
You both break out into giggles as he helps you with putting the chessboard back together, "I could teach you? and if you actually listen you might beat me" he says looking over at you, "One day."
You roll your eyes, "Okay, but first, do you want coffee?" you ask, standing from your place on the sofa as he looks up at you with an appreciative smile, he nods as you press a kiss to his forehead before walking off to the kitchen to make the pair of you some coffee. A slight feeling of determination builds up in your chest, determination to beat him in chess, one day.
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Tags- @violetrainbow412-blog
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therichantsim · 7 months
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Hi! I hope you don't mind that I'm playing catch up. It looks like your blog theme changed, so I went to your main blog to catch up, so I don't what was going on in the comments, so please excuse me if I echo anyone else's thoughts. Even though my brain wouldn't let me fully engage, I kept reading until I couldn't. I paused keeping up at Rose Ceremony Part 2 S15.Ep:58-BMB34, but the last time I really checked in, was Giddy up and Footloose, so that's where I went back to. I'm just commenting on each episode as I go along again because I don't fell like I really read them, so there's a significant chance that my observations may shift as I progress. That said!
Giddy Up and Footloose S15.Ep:47-BMB25 - Wow! I mentioned before that it was a fun episode, but having seen all the dates now, this is by far my favorite. It put Chanel in the like column with Lucy, personality-wise. Romance-wise I was undecided because I still wasn't rooting for anyone yet. I also said before that Chanel is a sore loser who hides their shortcomings with arrogance, and while I still think that, I also think that arrogance is a natural state for her and that rather than hiding her short comings with arrogance, it's more like, she does not like to fail (who does?) but she doesn't have time to dwell on it, so she just throws on an extra layer of confidence that she has in reserve and moves right on. Her ego has been well-nurtured and even though he's not egotistical, Chanel would be the first (other than Trin) to put Quinton in check if his ego ever decides to out-pace him. I think I also said somewhere else that Chanel's confidence is (likely) deserved, but now I'm removing "(likely)" and giving her her due. She is all that, but is she marriage material for Quinton? I'm not entirely sure. Friends, though? Definitely. As long as the future Mrs. remains confident in the fact that she was chosen, I think they could be real friends post-show. Also, the 3-way convo with Draya, Yasmine, and Noemy once again had me in stitches!
Inner Child S15.Ep:48-BMB26 + Do You Still Believe? S15.Ep:49-BMB27 - It was never articulated, but I feel like Lucy's tears were from both relief and sorrow. Relief that someone actually got her to an extent, saw something of her and made an attempt to feed it. And sorrow because she had dismissed the first effort that person made, an effort that she's now realizing was an earnest one. Sorrow because she's so used to being disappointed in that respect that, even in the face of promise, she couldn't or wouldn't let her guard down. She probably thought the show would be fodder for her audience, if nothing else, but was caught off guard by the genuineness of it all (save for Trin's antics). She has an open curiosity about her because she's lived a life with few limits--for her, there's always something else or someone else, there's always the next one--but it seems like that's also made her take the things in front of her for granted. And poor Quinton, he was trying. That conversation over chess seemed to me like she was trying to rein in her expectations by defaulting a to contrary attitude, as if she was not just shutting Quinton out, but also telling herself don't let him in. I wonder if she was afraid that if she did let him in, he might come to believe she's as empty as she feels.
Art Therapy S15.Ep:52-BMB28 + Paint Sip and Kiss S15.Ep:53-BMB29 - First I'm going to say the first shot of Noemy had me laughing until I had hiccups! Now, Zahara's disposition during the date was a bit of a surprise to me. I was expecting her to be a little playful and silly, but it looks like her realization that she was more invested than she thought she was and that she did sign up in hopes of getting a happily ever after that could end up in someone else's hands put her in an introspective mood. I was surprised that Quinton not only interrupted their argument but also told Noemy to leave. He barely acknowledged any of the other interlopers, so I have to wonder if it was more than the scene they were making that made him feel like he had to intervene?
I'm trying to keep these short. I'm going to break here for now, but I'll be back soon enough; I hope you don't mind. I feel so refreshed after reading again!
First let me say you a such a breath of fresh air to this community and I truly enjoy your thoughts and opinions on my post. So please never feel like you’re being or doing too much. YOU ARE APPRECIATED this is good food for my creative soul. Now as far as my theme changing I am so blown I looked up and my theme was gone after spending so much time looking for the perfect one that worked with all of this god forsaken apps changes and updates. So I just threw the current one there as a place holder. Thank god for my main blog but I know people prefer to engage here. I love you thoughts on the dates and I’m looking forward to the reading your thoughts on the rest of the dates and the rosé ceremony.
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satbiym · 1 year
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I posted 1,423 times in 2022
40 posts created (3%)
1,383 posts reblogged (97%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@sabraeal
@juliana677
@thejollyshiner
@satbiym
@rainbowravioli
I tagged 220 of my posts in 2022
#mypost - 47 posts
#about me - 45 posts
#mytags - 21 posts
#fav - 19 posts
#baid reference - 15 posts
#strange loops - 6 posts
#spyxfamily - 6 posts
#fic ideas - 6 posts
#truth is stranger than fiction - 5 posts
#svsss - 5 posts
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#i'm feeling feelings about the concept of without hesitation throwing away the status and public accolade of having a symbol of ur success
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
When Sasaki texted "it's all too much. I'm going home." to his friend and actually went home, all because Miyano had accidentally kabedon-ed him. It was simultaneously both King shit and Useless Gay shit. The duality. You're gonna fail your high school exams, Sasaki my bro, but still, mood.
57 notes - Posted May 19, 2022
#4
Spy x family whispering "Maybe family isn't supposed to be about sanding away the edges of your identity to cram yourself into a pre-set mould of parent-child-sibling. Maybe family is about finding the people whose rough edges align with your own and making your own normal. Maybe family isn't a destination you plan for, but a journey you can grow safely and securely through."
Like the series really went "yes this is a spy thriller. But, it's not About That Right Now."
Spyxfamily really looked at 3 different kinds of weapons (from the perspective of their handlers) - a spy, an assassin and a mind-reading test subject, all three viewed as nothing more than tools for the greater good of world peace, and said, "Just because they are strong why must that be all they can be?
Just because she's a mind reader, why can't she also be a child and have a safe childhood with a stable support system.
Yes. They can survive alone, but why can't they thrive together?"
93 notes - Posted May 15, 2022
#3
Shen Yuan, unironically: I was put on this airplane-forsaken world for the sole and most vital purpose of making Luo Binghe as happy and satisfied as anyone can be and I'll make that happen even over my dead body (no homo)
140 notes - Posted August 5, 2022
#2
Me, trying to put to words in as accurate and succinct a manner as possible, the importance of fashion in not just facilitating individuality and highlighting in-group membership in specific communities, but also acting as a kind of low stakes tool for subtextual communication - much like the use of metaphor in Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet which allowed Romeo to communicate his romantic interest to Juliet in a non-threatening way giving Juliet the no pressure option to fake not understanding the open invitation and as a side bonus allowing Romeo to save face with the well-meaning pretense neither believed in, but if Juliet was interested giving her the option to continue the metaphor to further their correspondence, eating the cake and having it too in a way with no major losses (... in that scene at least :/ ) - so that people In The Know (due to being in the same community) can easily identify and choose whether they want to in turn unveil themselves and continue the secret code hidden in their body language with no one else outside the community the wiser. Fashion as a vehicle with which to exercise your own agency and facilitate another's ability to choose and engage risk-free and without pressure: I like your shoelaces.
166 notes - Posted May 21, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Spy x family thoughts that I cannot stop thinking about
- "papa is a liar" (affectionate)
- the expected "spy needs a fake family" trope being flipped on its head and subverting the dynamics of the inherent power imbalance by virtue of a different kind of information asymmetry. It's like everyone is trying to play 5d chess blindfolded in good faith, but what most of them don't yet know is that the youngest and seemingly the most vulnerable member of their game has actually taken off the blindfold and replaced the chess board with uno.
- the family consists of the only people in that universe who can keep up with each other naturally and without compromising their own sense of self. Power family ahhh
- spy x family is to the spy genre what addams family was to the family sitcom genre. Get in losers, it's time for a new normal
- the very epitome of "everyone in this family is an outlier" so every time a normal person interacts with them, by virtue of majority rules, the normie starts to look around and question "... wait, am I the problem??????? This is weird, right????!" But no one validates that sentiment. Bless
- "Anya williams. Anya levski. Anya roche. Anya klein."
- Anya Forger.
- E L E G A N T!!!!!!!!! 🦢 🎩
473 notes - Posted May 15, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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somesadguysdiary · 1 month
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10:55 PM GMT, Sunday 24th March 2024
I realise I completely forgot about this for most of the month, but eh, I warned that I would.
Anyway, I'm only posting because I feel like I've just had an epiphany.
One of my new friends (not mentioned in the freinds post) recently put me onto a web comic and after reading episode 103-104 I realised something. I realised where a lot of my feelings of inadequacy come from.
Growing up, a lot of the things I liked to do or wanted to be good at were restricted or discouraged. Playing video games? Limited to 2 hours a day and I barely get that. Singing? Too girly, not allowed to continue. Sports? I was too fat so I wasn't allowed to play with the other kids. Music? Too loud when I practice so I have to stop. Baking? I'm banned from cooking in the kitchen because "I leave it in a big mess". Drawing? Not as important as studying. Being good at doing others' makeup? Also way too girly. Chess? My step granddad was better than me so I was discouraged. Acting? Deemed a waste of time.
Anything I took interest in, I wasn't able to fully develop or do at all, so I ended up with a barely surface level understanding of lots of things. Meanwhile, all of my friends were able to fully explore what they wanted and developed their skills as a result. All of my music freinds? Better than me. All of my theatre friends? Better than me, etc, etc.
Die to not being able to develop any skills in things I liked, I ended up being surrounded by people who were better than me at anything i tried, and it felt bad. It still feels horrible. Couple that with academic gifted kid syndrome and not having many friends, if any at all, you get a big ball of unresolved inner turmoil, self doubt, shame and self hatred. I hate that I can't do as much as anyone around me. I hate that whenever I say I can do something, there's always a freind that can do it better and then I look like I was arrogant by saying I was good at that thing. I don't hate my freinds, I hate me.
So now I'm stuck with the feeling that I can't do anything right, so I don't try anymore. I just give up as soon as there's any difficulty because that means I can't do it.
And whenever people try and console me about it I refuse that they're correct. I've heard it all before and it hasn't worked. Not because the advice doesn't work but because I won't let it. I push people away when they offer me help and then when I tell them to leave, they leave, when I really did want help, I really did want to be better. But I keep being too stupid and pigheaded that I don't let them, and then they get annoyed and leave. Because of me.
I mean hell, the only reason I started this blog is because I don't have anyone to voice these concerns to and if I do, I don't want to bother them or bring down their mood. I made this whole post about needing or wanting help and I can't even ask for it.
God I'm useless.
Or not...
Actually yeah, that's a good point.
I can just use this blog to help with that issue.
I can use this to congratulate myself or whatever whenever I do something good, like asking for help or stopping being so useless. This way I can work on that and push less people away.
I just need to clear my mind, and look at this from another perspective. I need to stop blaming other people and I need to stop making excuses for myself.
If I work on it bit by bit, then maybe I can come out of this on the other side as someone who is actually happy with who they are!
Idk where to start though.
I guess I could start by hanging out with my freinds more? Or maybe I can tell them about the things I thought about in this post? I could even try out getting better at something gradually, like baking, though it is expensive... I mean I could try practicing the drums- or both!
I would have to do this behind my step dad's back though, considering he's the one that banned me from using the kitchen.😑
Anyway, this post turned out to be more therapeutic than anything, thank you for reading my self hating, weirdly self-insuring post! And if no one but me reads this, at least I voiced these feelings rather than containing them- HOLY SHIT THAT'S WHERE I'LL START.
I CAN START BY USING THIS TO VOICE OPINIONS AND FEELINGS SO IM USED TO EXPRESSING THEM.
Anyways, BYYYEEEE.
-Some Sad Guy (SSG)
11:20 PM GMT, Sunday 24th March 2024
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cas-rivaille · 3 years
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HELLO, DEAR!
Undertaker here! How are you today?
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I was thinking the other day and I remembered an idea of mine I requested some time ago to another blog and I wanted to see your point of view as well, if you're comfortable with it ofc! I'll change it a bit because I have more ideas about it than before.
What if, hear me out, Obey me!MC was Sukuna's vessel??
I was thinking about a Female!MC but if you want you can keep them gender neutral (I don't mind!). So let's get into it, shall we?
Some facts about MC before the Devildom:
- They've already eaten all Sukuna's fingers
-But they are able to keep him calm inside themselves because over the year they've been together, MC decided to approach him more (Ya know if you have to die with/for someone, at least know them better)
-Sukuna took a liking to the MC, even though he would never admit it. (I mean- They always visit him in his domain to talk to him, read together, play cards (yes. You heard me. The king of curses loves Poker and UNO) or chess, they always ask him where would he like to go eat something, offer him some of their food to let him try new things, ect. Sometimes, but only SOMETIMES, they let him take control (not fully but they both can talk from the same mouth and he has control over one side, while MC has control over the other one))
- Having said that, Sukuna's still a stinky sassy bastard King. He's still rude, acts like he doesn't care about them and always finds a way to let them down when they're too happy. If they're sad though, he doesn't hurt them more. Sometimes MC even asks him advice whenever they're in doubt and after his bulling he actually gives pretty good advice (if you consider extreme violence a good advice that is)
Anyway, MC was going to get executed when suddenly they fell into Devildom. Their file didn't mention Sukuna at all and MC noticed that because when they arrived covered in talismans and chains the demons were confused about it. So, they kept the King a secret until lesson 16.
After Belphegor's crushing hug, while MC (the one from the original timeline) is in Mammon's arm, before Barbatos Thanoses the other timeline, Sukuna heals them and takes fully control of their body (the tattoos, the fangs, the long black claws, the other pairs of eyes and arms appear).
Now, HOW would the brothers, Diavolo and Barbatos react?
If it is too much or I did something wrong, feel free to ignore this! It's okay! Love you and have a good day!
OH MY GOD ?? THIS IS FANTASTIC THANK YOU OMG !
(i think i'm gonna do it hc style for the individual characters feelings but also some dialogue n stuff and each hc thing for each character is written as like in the game like they all like MC except belphie for obvious reasons)
tags: swearing, lesson uhhh smth spoilers ?? i think like 16 ?? (lmk if i need to tag anything else)
also hi ‘taker🥺🥺 i’m good today,, had a bit of a rough morning but i got to see my partner so i feel better !! how are you ? :D
and without further ado..
MC who is Sukuna's Vessel
- hold up
- hold the fuck up
- it was confusing enough when there were two MCs and one of them was near death in mammon's arms
- but now the injured MC gets healed and comes back to life ? but has another set of arms and eyes and is covered in strange tattoos ?
- then the other MC disappears ?
- when the demon MC starts talking, their voice is different and what-
--
"What the fuck did you to do MC?" Sukuna hastily spits out, checking the body for any other injuries. MC's voice is back and talking out of the same mouth.
"Sukuna, stand down," MC says.
"But he almost killed you ! Without me we wouldn't be standing here right now !" Sukuna argues back.
"I'm aware of that, but we have to be civil about this and talk to them," MC responds sternly.
"Then I want to be present for it. I'm not letting anything happen to you- I mean me. Yes me because I die if you die and I'm too godly to die," Sukuna rambles out before retracting the other set of arms but leaving the tattoos. He opens one of the eyes and forms a mouth on MC's right cheek to watch and participate in the conversation.
All the brothers and Divolo looked stunned at the scene that just happened.
"Questions ?" MC jokingly asks.
--
Lucifer -
- what ?
- questions ? is MC joking ?
- who the fuck is talking out of MCs body and what jurisdiction does he have
- isnt MC supposed to be human ??
- what does this mean for their relationship ?
- why did MC keep it from him ?
- he looks at dia and barbatos with the most confused face
- looks back at MC equally confused
- def hurts his pride that he didn't know
--
"Explain"
Lucifer's confusion turns to anger because that's the only way he knows how to cope/react to this.
Sukuna starts talking.
"Show a little more respect. I'm a king after all."
"Don't be an ass," MC shoots back. MC looks at Lucifer a little embarrassed.
"Uh, so this is Sukuna. He's the king of curses ? We kind of share a body because... uhh... it's a very long story but i mean the gist of it is I ate his thousand year old fingers ? There was 20 of them because he had two sets of arms like you saw before- it was very gross- but i had to because of the energy they posses ? When you brought me here and I was covered in seals and chains, was when I was about to be executed because I have all of Sukuna in me. So,, he can do stuff like heal my body and give me cool powers ? I don't really know what else to say." MC rambles using awkward hand motions and finishes by scratching the back of their head.
"Way to make me sound like a total fucking loser," Sukuna glares at MC.
"For the love of god stop talking-" MC shoots back.
--
Mammon
- huh ? someone has been sharing a body with his MC the whole time ?
- were they present the whole time ?
- did they see him acting like an idiot in love ?
- was sukuna there during e v e r y conversation he's ever had w them
- never felt more insecure and betrayed tbh
- why wouldn't you tell him ? he was your first
</3
- wants you all to himself
- doesn't want to share you with some four armed idiot
--
"So he's just, there all the time ?" Mammon asks.
"Not really? He has a headspace and he usually just chills in there but he can watch what's going on if he wants to." MC responds.
"That makes me sound lazy," Sukuna complains.
"Well if you don't like how I describe you then maybe you can talk about yourself. You're very good at it," MC smirks.
"Fine. I can do whatever I want. We can trade who has control over MC's body. I have a large supply of cursed energy and will beat the shit out of the next person who touches MC," Sukuna glares at Belphie.
"Yeah beat them in poker maybe. But not mariokart. You suck at video games in the headspace," MC laughs.
--
Leviathan
- was that how MC was so good at video games ?
- because they spent hours on end with this guy in their head playing video games ?
- why didn't MC come to him to play games ?
- why is MC okay with sharing a body with Sukuna ?
- why can he be the one to share a body with MC ?
- why was MC playing video games with literally anyone else ?
--
"So let me get this straight, you are his fingers and now you share a body ? How does that even work ? That sounds like something out of the manga 'My best friend ate some ancient object and now shares a body with an immortal warrior'" Levi questions MC.
"Okay so, Sukuna lived a really long time ago. When he died, the only thing that survived were his fingers. They each hold an incredible amount of cursed energy and it's only his fingers so from there you can imagine how powerful he was with the rest of his body," MC explains.
"Okay but that doesn't tell me why you ate the fingers ?" Levi raises an eyebrow.
"Oh. So I went to a high school for Jujutsu sorcerers, which are people who can manipulate cursed energy, and once I ate the first one to save my friend from dying, my choices were to die now or eat all of Sukuna and then be executed because he would die with me," MC says as if them dying was nothing.
--
Satan
- why has he never heard about Sukuna in any of the books he's read ?
- he historically doesn't exist in anything the devildom has book-wise
- so who is he ?
- needs to find out everything he can about him
- is there a way to separate MC and Sukuna ?
- his blood is boiling at the thought of MC sharing a body with someone
--
"So you've basically had super human powers this entire time and elected to not tell us ?" Satan glares at MC.
"Well, when you put it like that it sounds bad. I just didn't want you all to meet Sukuna because he has a lot of anger issues and is quite an asshole and I was trying to avoid this entire conversation that is happening," MC sighs.
"Rude," Sukuna says.
"Anger issues. You think we couldn't deal with this ? Are you serious right now ?" Satan asks.
MC shrugs their shoulders nervously.
"How much do you actually know about what sharing a body with him does to you ?" Satan asks while looking at the small mouth and glaring.
"I mean, I get these marks because he had them when he was alive. He was also so powerful to the point he had four arms and another set of eyes, like you saw before. I get those when he takes over mostly, but I can kee him restrained. But the eye thing is why I've always had slits under my eyes because the eyes are the most common thing to show up. The arms don't really. But it's entirely painless so don't worry," MC somewhat calmly explains.
--
Asmodeus
- those marks make MC look so good wtf-
- not the time
- so this Sukuna person lived a thousand years ago ?
- what was this about jujutsu sorcery ?
- what even is that ?
- asmos not the brightest on the block but from the looks on his brothers faces none of them know what the fuck MC is talking about either.
- they've explained a little bit of it b there's still some missing info
- what is sharing a body really like
- how much of MCs body can change to be like Sukunas ?
--
"So how much of your body can he control ? What can he heal ? Could he bring you back from the dead ?" Asmo curiously asks.
"He can't control much because it's my body and I have a lot of raw power by myself. I don't know if he can bring us back from the dead. I don't think so though or else the Jujutsu school wouldn't have tried to execute me. He used to be able to bring us back when I hadn't eaten all of his fingers, but now I don't think he can," MC explains.
"So why do you let him live in your body if he can't do much for you ?" Asmo questions.
"Well one, I don't think there's a way to get him out-"
"I'm still here you know," Sukuna interrupts.
"You've made that clear," MC says before continuing, "And two he can do stuff for me. It's like a symbiotic relationship. I give him a host and he protects me."
--
Beelzebub
- protects MC ?
- that's his job
- why is someone else protecting MC ?
- overall confusion
- even tho MC has gone over it multiple times, he doesn't get how or why Sukuna is in MC's body
- maybe it's the shock
. was this why MC could challenge him to armwrestling and almost win ?
--
"So how long has he been in you ?" Beel asks.
"About a year," MC responds.
"Can he make you live longer aside from healing you ?" Beel asks hopefully.
"I'm sorry, I don't think so..." MC says while looking at the ground. They cross their arms. They look small, as if they aren't small enough compared to him already.
"So, what does this mean ? Now that your secret is out... are you going to stay in the devildom with us ? Or do you have to leave ?"
" If I leave I'll surely be executed when I go back to the human world. If I stay I don't know what will happen to me, but it's not up to me. It's up to you guys if you want me to stay. I understand if you want me to go, I was harboring a big secret and it's probably unnerving to know that you're never truly alone with me, but Sukuna actually cares about my boundaries even though he acts like he doesn't. There are some pluses and there are some drawbacks but ultimately you have to decide." MC responds, looking from brother to brother then at Dia and Barbatos
--
Belphie
- MC ? dead if you back to the human world ? doesn't bother him
- he doesn't care
- he hasn't known MC long enough to care
- diavolo may have told everyone that MC was a descendant of human Lilith and he told everyone the events that actually happened, but why should he have any attachment to MC
- MC isnt Lilith, and MC sure as hell doesn't like him after the events that happened today
- from what he's heard, MC dying would be good for the human world
--
"I say send MC back. What happens to them isnt our problem any more," Belphie says while under his magical restraints Diavolo put on him.
"Of course you would say that," Satan glares at him.
"Shut up Belphie !!" Mammon and Levi yell.
"You don't have any right to an opinion in this matter." Lucifer states.
"Belphie that's mean," Asmo says.
Beel frowns.
"I vote they stay. I like MC regardless, and if all I have to do is adjust to Sukuna then I'll do it," Beel says while looking Belphie dead in the eye.
There's a beat of silence.
"Me too," Mammon says.
"Hey ! I was going to say that !" Levi protests.
"Oooh~ Count me in !" Asmo says with a smile.
"I also think they should stay," Satan says and looks at MC.
"My personal preference is also that they stay, but Lord Diavolo it's up to you," Lucifer says and looks at Dia.
--
Diavolo
- he knew there was something off, but couldnt place his finger on it
- he also constantly got a powerful vibe from MC and this explains it
- he was very fond of MC and enjoyed their presence
- he knew what he was going to do
--
"Barbatos, what do you think ?" Dia asks him.
"The decision is up to you m'lord," Barbatos responds.
"Well Id also like the input of my trusty all knowing butler," Diavolo laughs.
"Then, I see no reason to send them back to the human world. They can live out their lives here and safe from the school that wants to execute them. It also wouldn't be an issue to get anyone from the human world here if MC so desired," Barbatos replied.
"Then it's settled ! Welcome to the devildom for the rest of your life MC!!" Diavolo smiled and welcomed MC with open arms.
MC smiled and accepted the hug.
--
Barbatos
- he didn't know all along, but he know when the timelines crossed and he had to erase the other
- MC was very near and dear to his heart though and he wasnt about to let them be killed
- just wants to keep MC safe
--
I HOPE I DID A GOOD JOB AND THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST REMEMBER TO FRINK SOME WATER ILY TAKER <3
- mars :)
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earnestly-endlessly · 3 years
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Hey! I hope I'm not bothering you, I just found your blog and I love it sm, and I saw you sometimes do cherik fic recs. Do you have any Canon divergence aus/fix it, preferably after Cuba, that are 30k or longer and have a happy ending? If not thats okay! You don't have to answer this. Have a wonderful day!
Hi anon, thank you so much. I’m happy you both like my blog and my recs. You are certainly not bothering me, and feel free to send me an ask any time. I have plenty of recommendations for you. Some of them diverge a bit from your request because I couldn’t help but recommend them as well. I will put a note on those who diverge from your request. As always, I only recommend fics I have personally read and enjoyed and I sincerely you love them too.
-Canon divergence aus/fix it, post Cuba, 30k or longer, with a happy ending cherik fic recs-
Not Half As Blinding- keire_ke
Summary: Cuban beach AU. Charles discovers that death does, in fact, solve everything.
Lay down beside me (so still and so soft) – C-Gracewood
Summary: A different take on the events of the film.
Rumor Has It – blueink3
Summary: "Did I hear the doorbell earlier?"
"Yeah, but I'd steer clear if I were you. It seemed a little tense. I don't know what's going on, but there's a kid out there who looks freakily like the prof."
Nearly six months after Cuba, Charles' life is turned upside down for the second time. Though he's slowly learning to adapt to the first, he's not sure he can handle the second. Luckily for him, there are a few people out there more than willing to help.
Forward Momentum – AsYouWish
Summary: Six months after Cuba, Charles and Erik find themselves thrown fifty years into the future, where they meet their older selves, the Avengers, and a world that's very different from their own. Faced with the pieces of their broken relationship, an unparalleled adversary, and dealing with Tony Stark on a daily basis, Charles and Erik do their best to adapt while trying to find a way back home -- and to each other.
When an Unstoppable Force Meets an Immovable Optimist – ToriTC198
Summary: "You are always trying to save me, Charles." Erik mused aloud. "Ever since you dove into the ocean and dragged me out. Did it ever occur to you that I might not be worth saving?"
A genuine smile broke out on Charles' face as he brightly answered, "No, my friend, not once. I have every confidence you are well worth saving. But, I never truly believed I could save you. You are not the sort of man who someone saves. The choice to be a better man has always been yours to make and I hold no illusions that I can make that decision for you. I simply have faith that one day you will save yourself. I only hope I am still at your side to witness it."
What if Erik and Charles had been able to find a middle ground in the end?
Take the First Option – ShowMeAHero
Summary: When Erik becomes unbalanced, Emma presents him with three options: go back to Charles for three months and learn to deal with whatever he has going have going on, lose his Brotherhood, or let Emma control his mind.
He really only has one choice.
Virtue to Which We Aspire – varlovian
Summary: Nine months after Cuba, Charles is found by Erik's Brotherhood in the smoldering ruins of an abandoned CIA base, exhausted but alive. As the only known survivor of the CIA's vendetta against mutants, recovering Charles' memory of the incident—which he admits to having forgotten—just became paramount.
But the harder they push, the closer Charles gets to breaking point. When he finally cracks, the X-Men and the Brotherhood will learn the truth, but it comes with a price...
Some doors, once opened, cannot be closed.
Some minds, once broken, will never be the same again.
The Waking of the Red King – rustingroses
Summary: When Charles' heavy injuries on the Cuban beach conspire to leave him in a coma and living in fantasy of his own making, Erik, the man who once threatened to divide the mutant cause, finds himself desperately trying to hold everything together. First of the Red King trilogy.
Wake Up and Smell the Pancakes –  Ayra Sei Ethari
Summary: In one universe, Erik left Charles. In another, he stayed. So what happens when the two Eriks get switched? "At first, Erik thinks he's dreaming. Then he realizes that this is Charles. Who is not paralyzed. And kissing him.
Rage and Serenity – MagickMaker, TheFangedGoblin
Summary: After Charles is shot on the beach, he is rushed to the hospital and paralysis is prevented. Ridden with guilt, Erik finds that he cannot leave him. He helps him heal, and eventually, Charles learns to trust him again. But when they set out to rescue Emma from the CIA and accept her onto their team, tensions rise. Will love keep Erik and Charles together despite their differences?
No Yesterdays on the Road – pocky_slash
Summary: It's been two months since Cuba and things are settling down for Charles, Erik, and the beginnings of their mutant school. Right up until Charles disappears, that is. Faced with the possibility that a bitter Emma Frost has kidnapped Charles, Erik is forced to team up with Moira to hunt down the remainder of the Hellfire Club. From there, they hope to locate Frost and retrieve Charles, without killing each other along the way.
(Or: Erik and Moira Drive Across the Country and Talk About Their Feelings.)
What Can We Do Without You? – SwoopSwoop
Summary: Charles and the boys were holding onto a secret more dear to them than their own lives when Charles disappears into the night; Erik is betrayed and finds himself returning to Westchester in the hopes that the government was just trying to trick him. All the while the boys are stuck in the middle, left guarding the secret from the man they are most afraid of finding out who is weaselling his way back into their lives alarmingly easily.
Note: Includes Mpreg, but don’t let that discourage you from reading it because it’s a really great fix-it.
Survival Instinct – Lindstorm
Summary: It’s been months since Charles pulled Erik out of the ocean, and Erik is beginning to wonder how many more times he can choose Charles, and still keep his vow to kill Shaw. Cooperating with the CIA is straining Erik’s patience. When a fact-gathering mission goes wrong and Charles is kidnapped, Erik is left trying to hold their mutant band together while Raven and the rest of them fall apart. No one can foresee how the mutant Charles meets in captivity will challenge all his assumptions about his own power, and twist Charles’ telepathy out of his control. In the race to stop Shaw's nuclear ambitions from coming to fruition, Charles makes a crucial misstep. Erik’s decision between Shaw and Charles takes on unexpected ramifications when [spoiler deleted].
Needles (Series) – Skull_Bearer
Summary: AU where everyone's born Dominant or Submissive
Once a Dominant and Submissive pair is born, they are linked to each other, no matter how far apart they are. This link doesn't actually tell the Dom or the Sub each other's thoughts, but it does allow them to know how the other's doing and serves as a reassurance that there's someone meant for them out there.
Another one of the reasons that Erik hates Shaw so badly is because Shaw managed to break Erik's link to his Sub. Now Erik doesn't even know if his Sub's alive because breaking a link like that can kill a Submissive.
Meanwhile, Charles hates himself for not yet having telepathy strong enough to contact and help his Dom, especially after feeling the pain his Dom was forced to go through. He truly believes that his Dominant is dead. Hopes it, some nights when he remembers how his Dom was forced to suffer. It's better than to think of his Dom still being forced to bear that pain.
And then Charles pulls Erik from the water
Time to Grow – zarah5
Summary: In which you'll find chess dates which aren't dates (or maybe Charles is wrong about that). -- Based on First Class, this turns (slightly) AU during the beach scene.
Note: This fic is less than 30k words but it’s such a fandom classic and just a great read if you love your fix-its.
Faults for Fixing – beren
Summary: Charles sees the events of the missile crisis and subsequent weeks when he uses Cerebro to touch the mind of a mutant with the power to see the near future. When he wakes up he is determined that he will not allow them to happen and he will not lose the people he loves.
Note: A bit less than 30k words long but another great read.
It’s like one of us woke up – kaydeefalls
Summary: "You came here for me," Charles said, meeting Shaw's gaze levelly. "So let's not waste any more time."
Canon!AU in which Charles and Erik do find Shaw in Russia.
Note: XMFC fix it, but the events in Cuba don’t happen. 
Afterlife – Anna (arctic_grey)
Summary: A year after Washington, Erik wakes up in excruciating pain as sudden awareness washes over him: Charles is dead. Erik has to adjust to yet another future: no extinction, just a world without Charles. But the death of his former friend leaves Erik weak and his powers drained. His quest for answers leads him back to Westchester, where Erik has to face his past with Charles and put together the puzzle pieces of what happened to the man he once cared for.
The Burdens We Long to Carry – arcapelago (arcanewinter)
Summary: When mutant-supporter and ally President Kennedy is assassinated and all pro-mutant progress is dismantled, Charles is no longer so confident that he's on the right side, and extends his hand to Erik after a year of animosity. They settle tentatively into their old partnership, but not everything is the same as it was--and not everything can be. When Hank develops a metal frame to move the lower half of Charles' body for him if he wants it, Erik offers the use of his mind and his ability in order to make it work. Both find out what they're willing to do for each other, and neither knows if it'll be enough to keep them together.
Other Futures Than These – midrashic
Summary: In which Cuba doesn't break them apart, but that doesn't mean that their futures are tied together. (Except that it does.)
A Days of Future Past AU where only one person can defeat the Sentinels and save the future: the man whose imprisonment and torture created them, and Charles Xavier's ex.
The Winter of Banked Fires – Yahtzee
Summary: Charles Xavier has returned from the dead -- but is lost within his own mind. Rogue has cast aside her own power and doesn't know where she fits in the world any longer. The production of synthetic Cure means mutantkind itself is newly at risk. And Magneto, turned human against his will, is in despair until the day he feels a familiar consciousness tugging at his own --
Set after X-3 (with much desperate fix-it applied), during XMFC, and every time in between.
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demonslayedher · 3 years
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Hello! I don't know if you've been asked about this before but I love your analysis and reflections and I'd love to know all your thoughts about Zennezu if you don't mind 👀⚡🎀 Thanks so much for this blog!! 😊💝
Thank you again for your patience, as well as your comments on my fics and stuff in the meantime (even on Bird Fic, kya~ thank you <3). All my thoughts, hmmmmn…. Well, clearly I am a fluffy ZenNezu shipper and ship-content creator now, but I sure didn’t start that way. This may be long and rambling and mixed between analysis and personal taste. (Actually, it turned into almost 4000 words.)
So. First a little background. I usually am not much of a shipper. The very few OTPs I have all ended in horrific tragedy, and when romance is a big focus of something I’m otherwise enjoying I usually end up not paying much attention to it in favor of all the other elements I like. This is so much more the case when you can tell they’re going to wind up happily ever after. So what happened to make me so soft and fuzzy about the Kimetsu ships, when I otherwise usually don’t have an appetite for happy fluffy romantic endings?
Three major factors: 1. I’m obsessed. 2. I love these characters and want to see anything and everything about them. 3. Romance wasn’t actually a big element at all in canon, so it left me with an appetite and curiosity for it.
Even though I figured from long ago that ZenNezu would be end game, initially I was somewhere between indifferent and put-off. As much as I love Zenitsu, and I acknowledge that Ufotable the added the “run around and chase Nezuko” bit and removed the part with Zenitsu adoringly talking to Nezuko through her box, and as much as he can be defended for being lonely rather a pervert, the fact still stands that his level of appreciation for girls makes the characters around him uncomfortable. His most cringe-worthy lines at the Butterfly Mansion are all straight from the manga, and even though he was easily one of my favorite characters by the end of my initial watch of the series, I was very put off by his “girls are all queens” surface-level comments and more disturbing pleasure he took in the presence of girls (especially when he could physically interact with them), not to mention his pathetic introduction bothering a complete stranger and displaying that he doesn’t actually take girls’ feelings into consideration.
All this made me inwardly groan, feeling bad for Nezuko, figuring they were going to wind up together because she’s a saint who can find the patience to deal with someone like that, as he clearly wasn’t going to be desirable to any of the rest of the female cast. Enjoying the series well enough despite this, it didn’t bother me terribly much, pairings happen, whatever, I have a history of ignoring them. But one day, well and deep into caring about this whole cast like they’re all my children, I realized something. Isn’t… isn’t it cute how they both get their strength from taking naps? W-wouldn’t it be cute to see them innocently take naps together? Naps to protect each other? Oh. Oh-h-h-h-h. Oh dear. Oh no, it’s cute. Oh no. OH NO.
And that was how my warming up to this pairing started, it very quickly grew into “I love these children and I want them to be happy, being with Nezuko will make Zenitsu very, very happy, I love seeing him happy, happy Zenitsu” but was still a little reserved about Nezuko. Zenitsu was going to make her happy, right? It wasn’t just going to be a case of Nezuko having gotten fond of him over the course of everything they’ve been though, he is actually going to be her taste and make her heart go “kyun” right? Oh Nezuko, oh saintly Nezuko…
Let’s take a moment to pause here and think chronologically, though, as well as analyze their personalities and tastes. Neither of them are particularly picky, we can start there. Aside from fussy busy-bodies like Aoi, as long as it’s a girl, any girl is Zenitsu’s type. He’s desperate, and he’s painted the whole of girl-kind in pretty similar, not always realistic rosy colors. Even though he’s been used and abused by so many girls in his past, it’s his desire to believe that each new one he meets will fit that rosy imaginary color he paints over them that he chooses to let himself be duped, because he really is that lonely. I’ll give him that, sure, he’s a healthy young man with an interest in physical touch, but his dream in Mugen Ressha gives a good indication of what he’s really looking for: companionship, someone who likes spending time with him, someone who will find him useful and believe in him and look to him for protection, someone who likes him enough to spare him the physical intimacy of simply holding his hand. This is all an extension of what Zenitsu desires as whole, hoping he can better himself enough to be reliable and valued in general. Picturing it in the form of a significant other is one very vivid way to focus all those feelings, resulting in that rosy ideal which Zenitsu probably knows in his heart of hearts is too good to be true. That’s why he probably doesn’t think he’s ever going to find it, and therefore why he’s all over any slightest chance of attaining it.
My gosh, if being abandoned over and over isn’t enough, the fact that none of the girls he dated in the past were ever willing to even hold his hand hurts so much.
Nezuko, though, grew up in a secure family with a good relationship to observe between her parents. She probably always envisioned growing up to be like her mother, the quintessential “good wife, wise mother” (a phrase coined later on in the Taisho period to idealize the traditional roles of a woman). She cooks and cleans and sews and the first fanbook even tells us she was good at using an abacus, so she can handle family finances like a pro. Her traditional values probably made her tastes pretty standard, hoping for a reliable protector, but also someone who might be as kind as her father and her brother. But as for what makes her heart go doki-doki? The extra comic at the end of volume 3 tells us that she does long since have a type, it’s a person who’s like a Hisha.
Hisha: a chess/Shougi piece that can move an unlimited number of spaces in horizontal and vertical directions, and is crowned a dragon when it enters enemy territory.
So, yes, this is the part where we all smile and point at Gotouge and say, “I see what you did there, Wani-sensei.”
I find this reassuring; it tells me that Nezuko can find her heart squeezed at how cool Zenitsu is instead of just coming around and liking him because she was flattered by his affection and learned to see how nice he is and stuff. There are plenty of nice Demon Slayers who are strong and cool protectors, but that ZING that Zenitsu has (when he’s asleep) is something that can make her heart race. I’m all for this. I hinge so much of my ZenNezu feelings on this Hisha comment.
The second fanbook states that Nezuko initially had trouble sorting out her memories, and because Zenitsu gave her two such different impressions, it felt like memories of two different people, but over time the memories overlapped to form one complete person. We could say that she and Zenitsu had two first meetings.
Initially, when she was in the box, her little demon heart did go doki-doki; it was the first time a boy besides her brother had protected her, so even though Oniichan is Number One in her heart for the general duration of canon, this encounter was sure to leave a flattering impression. However, when they met face to face that night, he was just some confusing dandelion yelling and screaming about weird stuff, and then he was just a confusing (and possible bothersome) dandelion wanting to hang around her and give her flowers and stuff. It’s anyone’s guess just how “there” Nezuko was at this stage, as she does seem to gain back more of her own will and thought processes over the course of the series, rather than being guided by very, very simple rules to govern her behavior.
Zenitsu feel in love at first sight, and the second fanbook tells us he asked Tanjiro about her human personality, seeing as she wasn’t fully there. He was initially doubtful that anyone so perfect as Nezuko could exist and figured Tanjiro must had been biased and therefore exaggerating, but can we blame Zenitsu for being a smidge guarded? He’s been let down a lot, after all.
We know from Taisho Secrets and side novels that Zenitsu spent a lot of time with Nezuko during their long recovery at the Butterfly Mansion. Even how much more thought we see Nezuko display in the Train arc, she probably underwent a lot of mental development in this time, and my guess is that due to how much he interacted with her, this is probably when Zenitsu went from being a strange dandelion to a strange companion. She probably focused more on the goldfish and the pretty flowers (which he did take her to see!) and any flattering mention of her brother, though. Zenitsu, I’m relieved to say, seemed to genuinely care about what would make Nezuko happy instead of selfishly assuming something like “she likes me too, she wants to marry me.” But knowing Zenitsu, he probably assumed that her willingness to spend time with him was an indication of being willing to talk marriage once she was more herself again, though.
Let’s pause here and put on our Oniichan goggles, though. Early on, Tanjiro has to insist to just about everyone that Nezuko is still her own person with her own thoughts and feelings. Being a demon has taken a lot of her freedom to act on her true nature away from her, but he knows she’s still in there and he treats her like an equal human being. He had to watch over and over as people see his sister and only think, “demon.”
And then there’s his friend Zenitsu, who looks at her and thinks, “girl. Girl! Girl. Girl. Sweet girl, adorable girl, best girl in the world.” And maybe that’s a little bothersome, but yes, someone gets it!! Someone understands! Even though Tanjiro’s initial concerns are keeping Nezuko from being bothered by unwelcome advances, as long as Zenitsu is willing to respect that Nezuko is not entirely able to speak for herself now, he seems pretty approving of Zenitsu (provided Nezuko decides she likes him back). I’d like to think there was an unspoken promise between bros on what boundaries to follow. Besides that, Tanjiro believes in Zenitsu a lot more than Zenitsu believes in himself, so Tanjiro probably wasn’t worried about the “strong protector” role a future husband should fulfil. Or at least, Tanjiro doesn’t seem concerned once he gets to know Zenitsu, he’d have rejected Zenitsu flat-out on that first meeting. Zenitsu, you are so lucky Tanjiro is so forgiving.
However, for as much as Zenitsu sees Nezuko as “GIRL!! Girl, girl, girl!”, he’s still got his rosy vision that conveniently clouds out any disturbing realities. She is, after all, a demon.
This is something Zenitsu never actually had the chance to struggle with, and I would have really liked to see him challenged by that reality a bit more. He never witnessed Nezuko’s berserker mode, nor did he ever see her struggle to keep from eating someone, he wasn’t even awake to watch her fight like a violent animal/angry toddler on the train. Had there been a scene of Zenitsu forced to face how terrifying she had potential to be, it would had really sold his commitment to Nezuko specifically, instead of only Nezuko as his most likely girlfriend candidate.
On the train, Nezuko has the good fortune of seeing another side of Zenitsu, getting one hell of a doki-doki moment. As she’s gaining more self-awareness back, it probably made those doki-dokis more complex too. While I understand there wasn’t a good opportunity to fit in the pace of the story, I love that Taisho Secret of her concerned about him before he wakes up. Instead of him just being that boy who shows her pretty things and says nice things about her Oniichan, this is when he starts becoming something a little more unique among all the people whom little demon Nezuko has bet and who have been nice to her.
In the months that follow, we don’t get much deviation from this slow development. Zenitsu’s feelings toward Nezuko don’t really change at all, but there’s another thing about this ship: neither one chose the other over anybody else. They sort of just came together, Zenitsu gets hooked on one girl at a time, but what if someone had come along with an interest in him? At what point would he had given up on Nezuko? Probably pretty quickly, if someone was serious enough about him. It wouldn’t have been a break up either, since he was still in the pursuing stages (might be more of a break-up conversation with Tanjiro, who had been tacitly supportive).
Actually, for most of the remainder of the series, the affection that Nezuko and Zenitsu build for each other is done when they’re apart, dwelling on their thoughts of each other. For Nezuko, we see this come out after the Swordsmith Village arc in her sunlit elation to see him again, and her efforts to greet him. She very clearly recognizes him and is happy to see him, a big difference compared to how she was more elated by the sight of a fishbowl before. In Zenitsu’s case, this deepening of his affections and running away with his thoughts and feelings results him declaring once and for all, this is her. He’s found her. This is the girl who he will be committed to his whole life, in his heart she is already his wife.
When human!Nezuko is gaining her memories back, her first impressions are of the boy showing her pretty things and giving her flowers, someone who probably has a crush on her, rather than thinking back to someone who she may have had a crush on. (Those cool impressions probably hit her later, I’m assuming, given the stress of the moment.) Romance is not immediately on her mind, though she does quickly recall having friendly affection for this boy for has always been so sweet to her. And Nezuko, handling his surprising level of affection gracefully, helps Zenitsu off the battlefield while he’s in terrible pain (though she probably was too, my poor girl, that fight with demon!Tanjiro was so rough). But honestly, not only is she probably too overwhelmed by everything to think much about romance, but she probably doesn’t take Zenitsu very seriously initially. She knows he’s got a tendency to overexaggerate, and it’s nice that he’s so sweet to her, but since he acts all fluffy and silly around her she probably thinks he’s not being that serious either. Furthermore, she’s got a lot of people to suddenly care about, Zenitsu has a lot to contend with for trying to get special attention. Hell, Zenitsu was probably awake and causing a racket while she was frantic with worry that comatose Giyuu might die. While she did remake Jiichan’s haori to fit Zenitsu’s later, see spent her time in the hospital mending Giyuu’s haori (Nezuko, baby, doesn’t your hand hurt though!?). While Zenitsu was swept up in happy “Nezuko is human now, we’re totally gonna get married” feels, he probably didn’t even notice that he was only one slice in a very big pie of memories that Nezuko suddenly found in her lap and had to slowly chew and digest.
So… this brings us to the extra post-canon comic in the second fanbook, which I initially did not like very much back when it came out in February. I’ve come around a lot to it, but what really hit me at first was “oh no, Nezuko really is only going to accept this marriage because she’s a saint, he’s not being desirable at all.”
But, treating it with a little more patience and sympathy for Zenitsu… he’s just gotten what he’s always wanted, of course he’s going to stop striving a bit and get blissfully carried away in it. And Nezuko, the ever sweet, isn’t going to stop him.
Some of the other commentary in the fanbook states that Zenitsu, for a time, found himself terrified of how girls could be sweet to his face while hiding their true thoughts about him. But, finding that Nezuko was not at all two-faced, he nearly “died and went to heaven” as the exaggeration goes. He doesn’t like to work hard in the first place (but does, because it will make people like Jiichan proud), so getting away with being spoiled is too big of a temptation to resist. Nezuko is sensitive to what makes the people around her happy or uncomfortable, so she never makes any request of Zenitsu. She’s so grateful to have their new little family that her happiness is everyone else’s happiness, she doesn’t really desire a heartthrob romance, even if being a wife and mother is an eventual goal. And, without being under any pressure to make someone proud, Zenitsu gets swept away and indulges.
Thank you, Tanjiro, for putting a stop to this.
He’s still rooting for Zenitsu, since this is his friend and he knows it would make his friend happy to wind up with Nezuko, but he’s setting himself up for failure, or setting Nezuko up to be cheated out on a good match at this rate (if she were to accept out of being nice). Very, very thankfully, Zenitsu responds well to pressure. By this point Nezuko has gotten so used to sweet but indulgent Zenitsu that he seems she totally accepted that his Hisha side didn’t exist anymore, if it even existed in the first place.
Good for Zenitsu asking for her response a year later (when they’d be getting to the legal marriage ages for the Taisho period anyway), he knew he still had shaping up to do to earn her affection. And Nezuko probably needed time to build some admiration for him again, since the doki-dokis were so gone. Even if he couldn’t use that super cool Thunder Breath anymore, it would probably catch her attention to see him strive again, to put effort into being manly, specifically for her. It wasn’t just the Thunder Breath that gave her doki-dokis, it was the Hisha knight-like attitude too, whether asleep and acting on his inner potential, or awake and bravely defending her based on his own goodness and faith.
I hope that in their married life, Zenitsu will retain that sort of manliness in being a provider for her, even he does get indulged a lot at home.
Now for how this plays into some of my fanwork and headcanons:
You know how I said all my OTPs were tragedies? Yeah, I love a good dose of angst. I did start writing a single-scene fic one time of injured Zenitsu desperately trying to cover Nezuko from the sun while waiting for Tanjiro to find them, and in Nezuko’s panic about the sun she starts losing her self-control over her appetite, and Zenitsu is forced to confront that the girl he loves could very easily kill him. I never finished it, though, and it was embarrassingly self-indulgent.
For my big favorite AU of a monster fanfic, I did add more ZenNezu on the massive edit, because by this point I just enjoy ZenNezu so much that I wanted more of it. But!! What I really like about working with it in this fic is that there’s a conflict: Demon!Tanjiro. In this canon divergence, Human!Nezuko and Zenitsu get to interact more than they ever did while she was a demon, and they both already have affection for each other, but the lingering fact that Tanjiro is technically their enemy gives me some tension and angst to work with.
Yes, I wrote a One Shot of Zenitsu and Nezuko as fresh new parents, but it was a bit of a dark dive into Zenitsu’s feelings of inadequacy. But domesticity comes with some inevitable fluff anyway, and likewise it felt embarrassing indulgent, and I can’t write fluff without a little bittersweetness. M…maybe the reason I’m not a shipper is because I’m easily flustered???
I’d like to think that Zenitsu got a desk job that he worked hard at because he wants to be a provider, and Nezuko does find his hard work attractive. I headcanon it was at an electric company, because hahahaha, electricity. I’d like to think he had a long career in that company (and although his colleagues know him for having a bit of an extreme personality and being obsessed with his wife, they sometimes catch glimpses of a very, very strong side of Zenitsu—like, scarily strong), and that when he’s old and retired in the Postwar Economic Miracle, he buys a fancy camera to take pictures of Nezuko (instead of “say cheese” it’s “Thunderclap and Flash!”), and he takes Nezuko to Paris because that’s the romantic thing to do. Also, I don’t like moustaches as a rule, but I totally approve of old man Zenitsu having a fluffy moustache.
World War Two, though… I’d like to think that if his job had him in the city, he was extremely reliable when it came to protecting his family in case of bombing. I’d also like to think that this was when the Kamado family moved to the city, because Nezuko was worried about Kanao and her nieces and nephews, so Zenitsu made sure they were all together. Inosuke might had taken the opposite route and taken his family to the mountains to shelter out there in the wild.
AAAAHHHH, listen to me being so self-indulgent with headcanons, I pride myself on sticking close to canon in my fanwork, I will never produce this, AAAAHHHH, I’m embarrassed~~~~I---I’m not a shipper! No! I don’t have a shipper’s bone in my body! Who needs romance, it means nothing to me, I don’t get swept up in happy fantasies about young newlywed Zenitsu and Nezuko, really I don’t, I take what canon gives me and I stick with it, I’m here for bromance and comradery and fights to the death, I—I don’t need disgusting fluffy feelings, ew, ew, no, really-----ahhh, too flustered, too flustered, too flustered, no, no, no, no, no, no, WHEN DID I BECOME A SHIPPER, nnnnnnnnhhhhjjjj
Which is all to say that Zenitsu and Nezuko as a pairing really grew on me, even though it is essentially a fluffy happy pairing that only got surface-level interaction and was never seriously challenged. It’s got some shadows lurking in there, especially diving into Zenitsu’s heart, but in general this was a slow build-up of mutual affection between two characters with pretty simple desires of their own, and most of all, a desire to see each other happy. That makes it a good comfort ship.
And they’re both are sleepyheads, hNNNGGGHHHhhhhHHHHHHHHHHH
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hashtagsmitty · 5 years
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Smitty's Thailand Adventure - Day 1
I'm inspired right now by Uncle Gilly's travel blogs. And since I'm in my hotel room at 11pm Thai time and nowhere near sleep despite being up for some ungodly number of hours, here we go!
Heading into this trip I was super anxious. I haven't gone overseas for 7 years, and I've never travelled alone before. It's not so bad since I'm hanging out with Josh the whole time, but it's still a bit weird. Plus, I don't speak a word of Thai. I'm sure that will be fine, but it's a bit iffy going in.
April and her mum drove me to the airport. We left early to make sure we'd get past any traffic. Plus, last time April and I went anywhere I fucked up the timing and we missed our flight. I guess that was on her mind? Long story short we were at the airport 3 hours early.
I got through security and check in fine. My passport photo is from when I was 21, with a baby face and bad hair. Some beefy security dude pulled me aside to scan my passport manually when the facial recognition shit didn't work. Slight monkas.
I got through fine, bought some Thai Baht and got jibbed on the exchange rate, and then went to the gate. I bought earbuds because I don't own any. It occurred to me later that I'd ordered the entertainment package on the plane which comes with them. It turned out being a good thing, because 3 hours is a long time to listen to airport sounds.
I walked around the terminal to get my bearings, then went to a café thing. It wasn't a real café, but it was close enough to make me comfortable. I got a steak, then sat down and started reading. I'm reading "Growth Mindset", a text about how the way you think about success and achievement is the biggest predictor for future successes and how you deal with failure. It's really interesting, lots of real-world examples, and I'm hyped to try to teach it to my new students.
The steak arrived. I asked for a steak knife and the poor waiter gave me the most embarrassed look. He went to check, then came back and said he wasn't allowed to hand out steak knives in the airport.
Thinking back, of course he wouldn't be, but in the moment it was a weird thing. I guess it felt too much like a real café?
2 hours left. I sat at the gate and read. I had pre-downloaded a whole bunch of Podcasts and music, too, so I was listening to music while I read and swapping to podcasts when I was bored. I kept checking the time because 2 hours is a goddamn long time to wait.
Eventually though the time ticked over and the JetStar dudes were calling for business class people. Before I could react, a whole bunch of vultures had lined up. Seriously like 100 people. I joined the line. They started calling for rows 44 to 57. I checked my ticket - row 57. I walked forward hesitantly, to see if I was allowed to cut the line and board. I pussied out and realized that I'd lost my place in line. I did a slow walk of shame to the back of the line. Then the Jetstar dude started walking down the line and calling for those rows. I cut the line and got on the plane. The dude checking tickets looked dead inside.
My seat was in the middle of the last row on the plane. Two old white dudes sat either side of me. Nobody spoke, as is appropriate. The dude to my right was a bit grumpy, and took up our entire overhead bin. I sat down after putting my bag away and started my music back up. While we were waiting for takeoff, I remembered my trip to Italy from when I was 16. I wasn't sitting next to anyone I knew for both of the 26 hour flights, but the in-flight entertainment had Pokemon Pinball, and I played the shit out of it. It sorta became a tradition when I fly, and I redownloaded the rom right before the plane took off.
It was good that I did, because the in-flight entertainment was garbage. I played chess, and the piece of shit computer played the same opening against me twice. The only difference between medium and hard was that it took 2 minutes to decide each move on hard. I played two games then quit.
The flight was boring. At the end, the pilot had to do some stupid holding pattern because the flight was early:
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The green circle bit was repeated 5 times. It added like an hour to the flight. It sucked being so close and having to wait so long. Speaking of waiting so long, being at the very end of the plane meant waiting 10 minutes to get off, and then waiting longer while people only grabbed their bags once they were supposed to move. Monsters.
Disembarked, went through immigration with no problems. The dude who waved me through was being so slow with his line. I held my passport open to the photo page when I gave it to him and he closed it when he took it. Awkward.
Customs didn't exist. Just walked straight out.
I met up with Josh. He was on the opposite side of the airport to where I came out. There were stacks of dodgy WiFi networks to sort through to find the one non-dodgy one. I felt like having to fight through 12 phishing networks before I left the airport was a bit much.
Josh and I got Korean chicken at the airport. It was okay, I'm not big on chicken with sauces. Or sauces in general. Or most foods in general. But, I felt like I should just dive in and broaden my comfort zone a bit. It was pretty good chicken. I'm sure it would be better at a non-airport franchise.
We caught a taxi to my hotel. Josh is staying in an AirBNB somewhere else. On the way Josh talked a bit to the taxi driver. She didn't speak any English and he barely speaks Thai, but she got us to our destination fine. It really drove (dwoop) home how foreign this place is, and how screwed I'd be if not for Josh living here. The taxi driver was not great. She was driving in two lanes for most of the trip, and I don't think I heard her indicate. The traffic lights have a dank coloured countdown for how long until the lights change. We need that in Melbourne.
We got dropped off at a skytrain station. It was attached to a huge shopping center like Melbourne Central. It was pretty sweet - I'd like to check it out when I'm less fried.
The streets looked pretty low-tier, but Josh said that it was average for Thailand, and that the closer you are to main roads or train lines, the nicer it is.
I needed toothpaste, and Josh insisted I get a local SIM card, so we went into 7-11. Josh explained that they're actually really cheap and good quality here. While we were sorting out the SIM card, the clerk needed to see my passport and take a photo for me to be able to buy it. It was weird, but everyone acted like it was normal, so whatever. The same thing happened at the hotel. Josh said they send the info to the government, but didn't say why. The clerk called me handsome in Thai as we were leaving. We got some weird salt toothpaste that Josh swore by. He said the first time was meh but the second time is amazing.
I was warned that there would be "massage parlors" on the street my hotel is on. Josh said the girls out the front would go out of their way to make me uncomfortable, and double so if we ignored them. We just stayed in the other side of the road instead.
The hotel is okay. Bed isn't great, but there's air con and a hair dryer. And a bidet, which I'm excited to try.
It feels lonely up here on my own. Like I said, I haven't travelled solo before, so it's a new experience. Bros will get a video tour of the room when I'm awake - it's 4am AUS time and I'm so fried. Gotta avoid that jet lag though, so normal sleep times.
I tried the salt toothpaste. It was okay.
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tarysande · 7 years
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So I don't actually have a tumblr (I've tried it before, but I'm a confused nugget and couldn't quite get the hang of it), but after reading your a lot of your fic on AO3 I keep on coming back to your blog. Your writing/posts/reblogs never fail to make me happy after a long week, so thank you! :) I'm sorry if you've already written about this, but I was wondering what fears Rose and Kiara see on their gravestones in the Fade? And what you think Cullen would see if he was able to go with them?
I’m sorry it took me so long to reply to this! And thank you so much for the wonderful compliments!!
You know, I felt like I had written about it, but when I went back to see if I could find anything, I couldn’t. Which makes me think maybe I just had a conversation with someone about it?
In any case, I have thought about this quite a lot!
Rose would definitely see Loneliness. Or being alone. She is the kind of person who needs other people around her, even if they’re being quiet. When she was at the Circle and doing a lot of reading to catch up on the years of studies she’d missed, she always read in the library, where there were guaranteed to be other people--and always templars--rather than alone in her room. Much of this fear of being alone stems from an incident in her early childhood (that I know I’ve written about before, but may be lost deep in my tumblr archive) where she was kidnapped and held alone in a black cellar for several days before her parents rescued her. So, as bubbly and happy and optimistic and effervescent as she generally is, there’s this old, old seed of darkness that is watered by being alone and lonely and abandoned.
Kiara would see Helplessness, I think. (I do think she and Cassandra would get along pretty well!) My first instinct was to say she’d see Failure, but I think helplessness is more apt. She’s spent her whole life (as the sister and daughter of an apostate) learning to be effective, clever, controlled, smart. She thinks on her feet and goes with her very well-honed instincts. She is not used to being helpless, and the moments she absolutely has been, like when her father died, or Carver did, or everything that happened with Leandra, or when the Chantry blew up in front of her eyes? They destroy her. She doesn’t know what to do if she can’t fix things or help people or make things right. Part of the reason Kiara has such a thread of tragedy in her (and she does) is that so many of the events of DA2 place her in varying degrees of helplessness. She’s constantly slammed up against her greatest fear and she tries and tries to keep on struggling, while the world around her tries and tries to keep on breaking her.
Cullen... I think, based on the way I interpret and write his character, his gravestone would read something like Loss of Control. I’ve definitely seen other people talk about this, and have seen interesting suppositions (like Demons or Lyrium or Forgetting), but, in my mind, all of those are connected to something broader. The Desire Demon stole Cullen’s control; so did Uldred, by putting him in a cage with the kind of demon who could manipulate him over and over and over. When he starts to realize what lyrium really does and the hold it really has over the templars, he decides he needs to stop taking it; he does not want something else to have control over him. His experiences at Kinloch and in Kirkwall (with Meredith) stripped him of control. Loss of memory is also a kind of loss of control. The care he takes with his appearance, his men, his armies, his plans, his chess, his calibrations of trebuchets? It’s about controlling what is in his power to control, to mitigate the potential fallout when things (inevitably) go sideways. He is a good Commander because he tries to plan and prepare for every possible eventuality. To completely lose control (by taking lyrium, by following bad orders because he doesn’t think for himself, by being toyed with my demons or magic, by losing his mind or his faculties) is, I think, the kind of greatest fear the Nightmare would torture him with. And it would be effective, because he already has plenty of experience seeing the darkest places loss of control can and have taken him in the past. 
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