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lifeofkaze · 2 days

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Cherry Red

Find the whole DarkNoir fun here.

Based on this ask by the fantastic @drinkyoursoupbitch

A/N: The last bit of the DarkNoir!AU (for now) naturally brings my favourite couple of them all. The amount of obsession I have developed for this version of them is entirely unhealthy, but what's new. Warning: dark noir world weariness, allusion to drugs and prostitution.

The room is crowded, the stale air stuffy with the stench of perfume and smoke. I know better than to mingle with the rich and famous. They suffer my presence among them - crave it, even - and yet my very being here is a testimony to both their boredom and their vices. They know it, and I do, too. What I don’t know is who is more disgusted by it.

The annual horse show - the start to a new season of gambling, a prelude to the vicious cycle of seeing and being seen and spending so much money it would comfortably feed a family of four in less than an hour - has just ended. The privileged few with enough money to matter have now assembled at the glamorous afterparty held in one of the most exclusive country clubs in town.

The privileged few, and me.

I keep to the side of the room, to the shadows cast by the twinkling chandelier suspended from the ceiling. Its fragmented light dances over the party guests talking about the day’s purchases and the latest gossip in a world open only to the not-so-lucky-few in attendance. I cast a weary look around the room. Through the haze of blue smoke, all I see are forced smiles on the gentlemen’s faces, and bored looks on the diamond-draped women clutching either their husband’s arms, their champagne glasses, or both.

So much glitz on the outside, so much dullness underneath.

Leaning casually against the wall, I find amusement in how the curious looks are dropped as soon as I meet them, but it is a grim kind. No matter how expensive my borrowed suit may look, I don’t fit here, and I know it. They know it, too, but that is what’s drawing their eye. I’m an outsider invading their secret circle, an attraction to be gobbled at. No one wants to admit it, but they are all slavering for their turn to talk to me. To do business with me. Money can only get you so much, but it can provide distraction and diversion to the vapidness of life - which is precisely what I’m here for.

I nod discreetly at the gentleman who has just left me with his head held high and a haunted look in his eyes, turning my attention back to the crowd who all pretend they haven’t noticed. Business has been going slow so far but I’m not concerned. The night is young, and people need their time to loosen up. It’s a tough business, riding out the high of spending thousands with a snap of their fingers. When they’re ripe for a new one, I’ll be here waiting for them.

The evening draws on. The vials hidden in the pocket of my jacket begin to dwindle, each replaced by a roll of banknotes that make conversation with the swanky snobs almost bearable, and the flirting of their bejewelled banshees slightly less pathetic. I nod obediently at the men and give the women with their fake smiles and real diamonds a deep look into their heavily painted eyes, every single time.

The things you do for business.

I have already given up hope of anything interesting but money rolling in when the doors open and a couple that is arriving late is led into the room. It’s the man I see first - combed back, sand-coloured hair, a suit more expensive than what I earn in several months, and a swagger that marks someone who is used to being made room for.

The woman by his side I instantly recognise. She is wearing a cherry red dress beneath a heavy fur coat, which gets taken from her shoulders by eager hands. The fabric of her dress - probably expensive as sin herself - shimmers in the light as she moves with a self-confidence that makes her look like she owns the world. Judging by the looks she’s receiving, she might as well. A tilt of her hand, the slightest raise of her red lips, and suddenly the light from the chandelier is rendered dull, and the gemstones of the women surrounding her have become lacklustre. The hint of a smile, and it’s her who lights up the room.

I watch as she follows her companion, accepting the champagne flute she is handed by her companion with a graceful bow of her head. He talks to her, and even from across the room, I can’t stop looking at the movement of her lips as she laughs. She puts her hand on him - well-placed, fleeting touches, never enough to raise eyebrows, always enough to not let him forget she is there. As if someone like her could be forgotten.

I know the man who has bought her company for the night; a lawyer from a well-established family. Rumour has it, he is in the run-up for a spot in the government. It surprises me that he risks being seen with her, out in public. But then again… what screams power more than a woman like her by his side and not a care in the world? Another touch, another smile. She has only eyes for him and him alone but even so I’m sure she knows that I am here. She always does.

As the music swells, the man takes her hand and leads her to the middle of the room, where other couples have gathered for a dance. She gives him a coy smile as he places his hand on her waist, the slightest bit too low for my taste. She shifts her hand on his body as they dance, not inappropriately but if you look closely, you can spot her fingers lingering, brushing alongside his arm a tad too slowly to not be suggestive. It’s an act she has perfected - the teasing, the game, the promise of something every man in this room desperately wants, including me.

Once the music has stopped and the poor guys bloodying their hands for the indifferent applause of the elite are allowed to take a breather, I can’t take it any longer. I slip into the crowd, making my way to her and her companion. I only look at him as I approach. I give him a small nod and a smile, my eyes fixed on his. It’s not quite a challenge but no subordination either.

“May I ask for the next dance?”

His eyes harden, the look in them resembling disgust. I’m not fazed by it. He’s been buying off me for too long to refuse me. He knows that I know, and I can tell how much he hates it.

“I don’t think this is appropriate,” the woman speaks up in her suitor’s stead, her voice snide and dismissive. I bow my head, my eyes finding hers. The look in them would be unreadable to most but to me, the spark in them is clear as day.

“Darling, don’t be impolite,” her companion says, the condescending smile people like him suck up with their mother’s milk forming on his face. “It’s only one dance, is it not? You’ll be back with me before you know it.”

“I’m counting the minutes,” she breathes as he kisses her hand, giving him a deep look from beneath her lashes as he walks away. When he has gone, she turns to me.

“Mr Amari.”

“Miss Jameson.”

I extend my hand and she takes it, allowing me to draw her closer as the music starts again. She smells like jasmine and mint, the silk of her dress cool beneath my fingertips as I place my hand on her waist, exactly where her companion’s hand has been.

“I’m surprised you’re here, Mr Amari,” she says as she lets me lead her into the dance. I raise my eyebrows fractionally.

“I go where the money goes, Miss Jameson. What better place to be than a horse show? I could say the same of you,” I add after a moment. “You have been gone for quite some time. A peculiar choice of event to make your reappearance.”

Her laugh is quiet and melodious, and I mourn its loss as she stops to speak. “Nothing but a return to the scene as a glamorous party, isn’t there? I missed the glitz and glamour.”

“The glitz and glamour missed you.”

She hums as she comes closer for a moment, not a second longer than the music dictates her to. I feel the warmth of her against me, and when she withdraws I have to stop myself from following her.

“What would be glamorous about watching breeding mares prancing around to be traded off?”

“Are we still talking about horses?”

“What else would we be talking about?” The smirk on her red lips has turned bitter. She averts her eyes. “Aren’t we all wares to be sold?”

“How so?”

“You said it yourself - everyone in this room has come because of money, one way or another. It’s what drives us, all of us.”

“Some of us,” I correct her, slowly spinning her around, “but not you. You don’t need this.”

“Don’t I?”

I tear my eyes away from her face for a moment. The man she has arrived with is watching us like a hawk, his attention like the tip of a knife grazing my skin. It’s as if I can see the tendons on the side of his neck protruding even from where I dance with her. He is ready to step in should anyone dare to claim his prize. I pull her tighter against me.

“You turned up in some illustrious company tonight.”

“I guess.”

She sounds bored.

“He might get into parliament next term. You’re bound to be talked about.”

She pulls a face. “It’s not ideal. Boss told me I could say no but what was I supposed to do? He keeps requesting me, every time he books with us. He wouldn’t let off, not even when I… had gone for a while.”

“He’d be a fool not to,” I say, but the thought of him singling her out like that makes me uneasy. I don’t like it, but that’s the deal with her, has always been. She’s a light too bright to look at, and the moths are inevitably drawn to her.

The dance floor has become crowded, and we need to watch where we step. I take the opportunity to pull her close, closer than I would have dared otherwise. She lets me, and I feel her body flush against mine, those curves hidden by her red dress, and the soft skin of her neck, beneath which her pulse is throbbing rhythmically.

Suddenly, she moves to the side, pulling me along so that I come between her and the eyes of her watchdog. She raises her chin, breath brushing over my jawline as she whispers into my ear.

“Are you coming home tonight? The kids are missing their dad… and so am I.”

Her words stir something I keep hidden deep within, yet I guard my face carefully. My eyes flick over the people surrounding us. They all seem too preoccupied with themselves to have noticed anything but you never know. We always have to be careful. So very careful.

“I’ll try,” I whisper back, my words not more than an exhale. “Make sure that you are, too.”

Her lips part to respond but before she can do so, the music stops. It takes a considerable amount of willpower to step away from her. Her eyes don’t leave mine as I raise her hand to my lips and place a kiss on the back of it. As she withdraws, her fingers quickly close around the vial I have pressed into her palm.

“Be careful.”

Her lips draw into a wicked smile that makes her eyes sparkle. It’s like the fleeting look of softness in them has been nothing but a fever dream.

“Worried, Mr Amari?”

I don’t reciprocate her smile. “Always.”

“I can handle myself,” she says and shakes her head. Nonetheless, the small vial with the clear liquid inside vanishes beneath the hem of her gloves as she does so.

“I know. Just in case.”

“Just in case.” She steps away, her perfect mask of indifference already back in place. Her eyes drop from mine but I know what she’s saying, a whispered secret forbidden to any ears but mine. “Wait up for me tonight.”

Then she turns, and all I can do is watch her leave. It stings, having to watch her and her cherry red dress walk away, right into the arms of the other man waiting for her. But as long as I know who she will be walking back to, I can bear it.

Even if only just.

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #lizzie jameson #orion amari #dark noir au

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oldschoolfrp · 1 month

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The party sets out for adventure -- Ugurcan Yüce cover for The Dark Eye introductory box set, Schmidt Spiele -- Schmidt France version "L'Œil noir;" originally released in German as "Das Schwarze Auge" (DSA). This art has been attributed to a second alternative version of the 1984 1st edition, and to the 1988 2nd edition.

#The Dark Eye #Ugurcan Yuce #Ugurcan Yüce #Das Schwarze Auge #l'oeil noir #JDR #jeu de role #jeu de rôle #L'Œil noir #DSA #Initiation au Jeu d'Aventure #fantasy RPG #adventuring party #castle #fantasy castle #1980s

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jojo-schmo · 4 months

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I’ve adored @desultory-novice ‘s Apologies AU! What a fascinating and emotionally compelling universe to explore, with Dark Matter Swordsman being Adeleine’s brother-?! I love every bit of it and I’m so excited to see what’s next!

This particular drawing was inspired by @driftwoodmfb ‘s take on that AU where Noir instead lives on Popstar and Adeleine was the one taken by Dark Matter…. I just love these characters and the story and AHHHH I need to sing your praises from the rooftops!! And AUs within AUs are so delightful :D

Anyway here’s an AU-squared drawing of Noir <3 I kinda referenced multiple of Dess and Drift’s drawings so hope it’s still true to Noir’s design :)

#Kirby au #dark matter swordsman #noir (human-form dms)#cw mild body horror #apologies au #apologies au au #art #Kirby OC

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sassyduckqueen · 1 month

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So this is Dark Luka's civilian design in the dark world.

I wanted it to reflect and mimic the Anatisverse Luka while still been different. As you can tell, I've got with a more emo/punk look for him, changing his hoodie for a leather jacket and adding more rips in his jeans. I chose a toxic green for his hair and gave him more pale skin. He has combat boots and a nose piercing. Unlike the good Luka, he doesn't wear a jagged stone shirt as he has a lot of angry towards his parents for abandoning him. Instead, I put a snake skeleton design on it. There's four reasons for this. The first reason is that its a reference to the snake miraculous. The second reason is because he is the host of Simme, who takes the form of a leviathan aka a sea serpent, the third reason is because the Supreme's symbol is a snake instead of a phoenix and finally because he is as deceptive as a snake in this universe. This is also why i drew out three expressions. This version of Luka is a manipulator and will use any technique to get what he wants regardless of if it's intimidation or a nice smile. He will play people and convince them to join him as both Luka or Brumus. Very few people see his true personality. I also made his guitar look more sharp and harsh

Brumus and Lady Ombre

#luka couffaine #miraculous ladybug #miraculous #anatis au #rise of anatis #tales of anatis and lady noire #tales of Brumus and Lady Ombre #Evil Luka #Evil Luka Couffaine #dark Luka Couffaine #Paris Parallel world #Brumusverse #Dark Luka #The Surpreme

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bloom-agreste-cheng · 1 year

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Scarlet Lady AU: The Chat Noir Method: A Compilation

@zoe-oneesama I have taken upon myself to build a compilation of every time a lucky charm or any object was used to hit the akuma so hard that it got defeated easily, which you have appropriately dubbed the Chat Noir Method. The earliest instance I could find was the Bubbler.

And my personal favorite:

There were a few instances I wasn’t sure could be considered Chat Noir technique. Cause people were either just dropping the Lucky Charm on the akuma, and not quite chucking hard enough for the villain to pass out,or just chucking stuff at them with little to no passing out.

All of these shots belong to Zoe-Oneesama’s Scarlet Lady AU of Miraculous Ladybug. I’m a big fan.

#miraculous ladybug #scarlet lady au #sl art #zoe oneesama #scarlet lady #marigold #chat noir #koki marina #anansi #lady wifi #darkblade #evillustrator #dark cupid #the collector #princess fragrance #pixelator #the bubbler #my posts

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blurryisme · 4 days

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(Bendy Noir) The Silent City's (2nd) most wanted criminals

#artwork #digital art #batim bendy #bendy and the ink machine #bendy and the dark revival #butcher gang #bendy noir #bendy au #bendy art #bendy fan art

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driftwoodmfb · 9 months

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An AU of someone's AU

To be more specific, @desultory-novice 's Apologies AU but if Ado got cursed instead of Noir (pre dark matter Dark Matter Swordsman).

I plan on doing more art where Noir takes Adeleine's role in the Kirby series and might even while the Rainbow Sword. He will not be wilding it against DM Painter though.

He probably felt some effect from the sword, but the effects ware off or something.

Yes, Noir still is the one who gave her the paint brush, so his guilt is strong

DM Painter's tears are rainbow paint.

Her body is fully dark matter, but is covered in paint. All her paintings that come to life are actually made from dark matter

I think that in this part, when Noir goes to check on Ado, he never finds her. He does not take it well when he finds out what happened to her and that she's dead. Maybe he'll think "At least she's not in pain anymore..."

DM Painter probably made scrawls on walls and floors made from things other than the magic paint brush that resemble Noir, but she doesn't remember why she draws that face.

#desultory novice #des #kirby #kirby series #kirby au #apologies au #kirby apologies au #dark mater painter #adeleline #dark matter swordsman #< mentioned #noir #Noir (human-form DMS)#des oc #character death mention #cw death #ado #dark matter adeleline #apologies au au

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kittkattys · 6 months

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After the battle

#miraculous #miraculous world paris #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #reverse au #emonette #punkadrien #mister bug #lady noire #toxic noire #dark beetle #miraculous world paris spoilers #miraculous ladybug

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nobodyfamousposts · 1 year

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Both concepts (Littlebug and Chaton meet ninja turtles) sound really cool, so either option sounds good. :)

Then let's do Overlord/Light Lord/Doll Army!

For the lulz...

(During the class trip to New York...)

Alya: I'm finally gonna see my penpal!

Marinette: Penpal?

Alya: Yeah! It was part of a project back at my old school before I moved to Paris. I became penpals with a girl in New York named April O'neal. And guess what? She's into comics, heroes, and journalism! Just like me!

Marinette: That sounds really cool!

Alya: I'm gonna meet her at the park during our break and we're gonna chat for a bit over lunch!

Marinette: Just make sure to be careful. New York is weird.

Alya: Pfft! Hardly. Sure, she's written about some crazy stuff, but there's no way any of it is true.

Marinette: Like what?

Alya: Like mutants and yokai and papermen and aliens and "mystic" stuff. I mean really! What are the odds of something like that happening in New York?

Marinette: The same as Miraculous and akumas and sentimonsters and "magic" stuff in Paris?

Alya: …

Marinette: …

Alya: …I'm gonna take the Dolls for protection.

Marinette: Your protection or theirs?

Alya: Gotta go! (Grabs bag with Chaton and Littlebug)

Littlebug and Chaton: (Are startled by the sudden movement but let themselves be taken along for a ride)

(At the park, April and Alya meet up)

Alya: Are you April?

April: Alya?

Alya: Oh my gosh! It's awesome to finally meet you!

April: Same!

(The two are chatting. Unbeknownst to them, Littlebug and Chaton have gotten bored in Alya's bag and have snuck out to play.)

April: (Looking at Alya's phone) So this is the Ladyblog?

Alya: Yep! My pride and joy!

April: (Looking over the blog and the posts) And this is all for real? The superheroes and monsters and everything?

Alya: I kid you not. Sometimes I wonder how Paris is still standing…

Chaton: (Finds a carousel and climbs on it)

Littlebug: (Spins the carousel)

Chaton: (Spinning around on the carousel)

Littlebug: (Jumps on)

Alya: Speaking of things you can't believe…were you joking about that stuff you wrote about?

April: What stuff?

Alya: Like…with the mutants? And the demon armor? I mean, I told my friend about it and she freaked out a bit because yeah, things get crazy in Paris, so I want to reassure her it's not real so she doesn't have to worry.

April: …

Alya: …she doesn't have to worry, right?

April: …

Alya: Right?

(Meanwhile, Chaton falls off the carousel, his eyes spinny. Littlebug hops off the carousel and helps the dizzy Chaton to the girls and into one of the bags to rest.)

April: Well, would you look at the time! Gotta go!

Alya: Wait! I need answers!

April: (Grabs her bag and leaves)

Alya: (Huffs) I'm gonna get that scoop sooner or later!

(Alya lifts her bag….then pauses once she notices the weight.)

Alya: (Opens the bag to see no dolls) ….uh oh.

(At the Lair…)

April: Hey, guys! (Sets bag down)

Mikey: Hey, April! What happened?

April: Nothing much. I finally met my penpal today.

Mikey: Ooooo! What's she like?

April: Nice girl…a bit brash though. She's running a blog in Paris that's all about the crazy stuff going on there.

Leo: Mutant crazy or New Jersey crazy?

April: All this stuff about "Miraculous" and monsters and magic. (Pulls up Ladyblog on her phone and shows it to the boys) And a cult apparently?

Leo: Like the Foot?

April: I dunno. Cuter, I guess?

Leo: (Reading) "Join the Light Lord Marinette's followers and get your own doll?" I don't see the appeal.

(Unbeknownst to the assembled group, the dolls have gotten bored and jump out of the bag to explore. Chaton wanders off.)

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(Meanwhile...)

(Raph has been minding his own business and just finished doing some training so he was putting the equipment away. All that was left were the weights.)

Raph: (Picks up the weights one at a time to put back on the stand)

(A small weight is lifted up to Raph by little hands.)

Raph: Thank you! (Takes the weight and puts it on the stand)

(Pause)

Raph: …wait. (Spins back to see Chaton)

Chaton: (Lifting another small weight, trying to be helpful because Mama taught him to always clean up and put things away when he's done with them)

Raph: …

Chaton: (Smiles)

Raph: …AAAAAAAAAAH!

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(Back with the others)

Leo: So monsters and superheroes and ladybugs, oh my!

Donnie: Impossible. If even half of that stuff is true, how do they even keep the city standing?

April: It's magic, I guess?

Mikey: OooooOOOooooo! Magic! Like real magic!

Donnie: Scoff. It's not magic.

Leo: You can't just deny magic in everything.

Donnie: I'll admit to actual magic when it comes alive and beans me in the head.

(A red and black-poka dotted ball smacks Donnie in the back of the head.)

Donnie: …oh hah hah, Leo. Slow clap. (Picks up ball)

Leo: That wasn't me.

Mikey: (Looks behind Donnie) There's nothing back here.

Donnie: See? It was Leo.

Leo: Not everything is my fault!

(Long pause)

Leo: …today, at least.

Donnie: And I suppose one of those "magical creatures" just somehow found their way to the Lair? Without any of us knowing? To just surprise us?

(Suddenly, the sound of Raph screaming from another room can be heard)

April: …

Mikey: …

Leo: …

Donnie: …

Leo: …aren't you gonna…?

Donnie: No. I refuse.

Raph: (Shouting from the other room) AAAAH! DEMON DOLL!

Donnie: It's not magic.

Raph: (Shouting from the other room) MAGIC DEMON DOLL!

Donnie: If I don't acknowledge it, it's not real and I am technically not wrong.

April: DONNIE!

(They run to the other room.)

Raph: (Backs away from Chaton in fear)

Chaton: (Confused)

Raph: Wait! If this is a demon like that creepy Cuddles demon, all I have to do is laugh at it! (Laughs at Chaton)

Chaton: (Stares)

Raph: (Laughs louder)

Chaton: (Starts to cry)

Raph: (Immediately stops laughing) Wait.

(Donnie, April, Mikey, and Leo rush into the room.)

April: What's going on?! Is Mrs. Cuddles back?!

Leo: Is that a catboy doll?

Mikey: (Gasp) And is it crying?

Donnie: …nope. I draw the line at crying inanimate objects. (Turns to leave, revealing Littlebug had been clinging to the back of his battle shell)

Raph: AAAH! There's another one!

Donnie: Wait—what?! (Spins)

Littlebug: (Hopes off Donnie and runs over to Chaton)

Chaton: (Still teary) ;_;

Littlebug: (Turns and glares at Raph)

Raph: (Tenses)

Littlebug: (Wags her finger at him, clearly giving a lecture and looking quite cross)

April: I think you upset them.

Leo: (Hamming it up) Raph! I expected better of you!

Raph: I didn't mean to! He was there and I just…

(Chaton's tears fall to the floor and everyone stares in shock and growing concern as the tears begin to burn through the floor where they land.)

Donnie: And its tears are corrosive, apparently.

Leo: Yeaaaah, you might want to make it stop before we end up with a basement?

Raph: (Looks down at Chaton)

Chaton: (Looks up at Raph, eyes still teary)

Raph: I'm very sorry.

Chaton: (Wipes his nose)

Littlebug: (Huffs at Raph, then pulls out a red and black-spotted handkerchief and wipes Chaton's eyes)

Chaton: (Sniffles but smiles once the tears are dried)

Leo: Well, I guess we know who the big sibling is.

Mikey: (Gushing) AWWWWW! They're so cuuuute!

Chaton: (Preening at the attention)

Mikey: (Pokes Chaton)

Chaton: (Nuzzles Mikey's hand)

Mikey: (Gushing even more)

Donnie: So I don't mean to interrupt this…this, but am I the only one concerned about the intruders to our Lair?

Leo: Good point. Any idea how they got here?

April: Didn't Alya mentioned something about Dolls on her blog? Maybe they hitched a ride with me during my meeting with her?

(They look at April's phone.)

Raph: So there are monsters and heroes in Paris?

Mikey: And these little guys are based on those heroes! How neat!

Leo: Does kinda give more credence to the whole "Light Lord" and "free doll" business.

Raph: So your friend just happened to have magic dolls with her?

Donnie: How do you even know they're magic?

Leo: Because they're dolls? And alive? Kinda screams magic there, Don.

Donnie: Not necessarily! EXPERIMENTATION will determine the truth!

Mikey: (Looks worried)

April: (Looks worried)

Chaton: (Looks worried, lip wobbling)

Littlebug: (Glares, silently promising swift and painful retribution)

Donnie: …and by "experimentation", I mean non-invasive non-painful mystic scanning.

Chaton: (Smiles)

Littlebug: (Suspicious but allows it)

April: Orrrr I could just try calling Alya.

Donnie: Sure, if you want to be boring about it.

April: Seriously, it'll take five minutes. Don't do anything while I'm gone! (Leaves the room)

All: ...

Donnie: You all know I'm doing it anyway, right?

Leo: You wouldn't be you if you didn't.

--------------------

(With April)

April: (Calling Alya)

Voice: (Picks up) Hello?! HELLO?! Is this April?

April: Uh yeah. Who this?

Marinette: My name is Marinette. Alya told me about your meeting and...nothing weird or anything, but would you happen to have a couple of dolls with you?

April: You mean the living dolls? Then yes, I have them here.

Marinette: Oh no! Please don't freak out! They're good kids, I promise! They're just children who like to play! They don't hurt anyone and usually stay out of trouble. Wait they haven't gotten into trouble, have they?

April: Trust me, they'd be in good company.

Marinette: (Confused) Eh?

April: Nothing! So about this whole "Doll Army" and "Light Lord" thing?

Marinette: I keep telling Alya to take that down! (Sighs) Can you tell me where they are and I'll explain it on the way? Preferably before anything happens?

April: What could happen?

--------------------

Donnie: (Scanning Chaton) Seriously, what are you made of?

Chaton: (Goes BRRR in the scan, clearly having fun)

Donnie: No mechanical parts to be seen. Just pure energy. And felt.

Leo: Soooo…magic?

Donnie: Not EVERYTHING has to be magic, Leo!

Chaton: (Nods because he is magic! Mama said so!)

Donnie: (Points at Chaton) Don't you argue with me!

Leo: (Looks back and forth between them) But…he didn't say anything?

Donnie: I know what he said! Per my scans, these two apparently have empathy—

Mikey: Awww!

Donnie: No, I mean empathy as an ability. Where they can sense the feelings of others and convey their own in their own form of communication. Like something out of a badly written teen vampire romance novel, but less pretentious. And annoying.

Mikey: (Gasp) They communicate through their FEELINGS!

Donnie: The one language barrier we cannot cross.

Chaton: (Holds up arms to Mikey because it sounds like he wants a hug)

Mikey: AWWW! (Hugs Chaton) You are adorable!

Chaton: (Smiles and purrs because hugs)

Raph: (Still nervous) Are we sure that hugs don't power them somehow? Like screams did for Mrs. Cuddles?

Donnie: (Doing energy readings) ….oh, they do. He's absorbing the ambient energy from Mikey’s presence as we speak.

Mikey: (Pauses, then goes back to hugging Chaton anyway) It's not like a little lost energy never hurt anyone.

Raph: Mikey! Put him down! He could kill you!

Mikey: (Hugs Chaton tighter) Worth it!

Chaton: (Hugs back because Orange boy is warm and sunny and he would never hurt him)

Donnie: Calm down. They’re merely absorbing excess energy. Like osmosis.

Raph: …why?

Donnie: (Shrugs) They appear to just be storing it like little batteries.

Leo: Okay…to do what?

Littlebug: (Throws hand in the air, causing a red and black-spotted screwdriver to appear)

Turtle Bros: (Stare)

Donnie: (Intrigued) …okay, that’s handy, actually.

Raph: Donnie.

Donnie: What else can you make?

Raph: Donnie, NO!

April: (Pokes her head in) Guys! I talked with their Mom. She says they aren't evil but ARE magic.

Leo: (To Donnie) Told ya.

Donnie: (Glares)

April: I'm gonna meet up with her to get an explanation. Don't do anything too crazy while I'm gone! (Leaves)

All: ...

(Ten minutes later)

(The Dolls are set up on the table and looking confused or amused in Littlebug’s case. Mikey is sitting on a chair in the corner, underneath a sign that has “Bad Boy Jail” crossed out and new words of “Quarantine Corner” written on it instead.)

Mikey: Can I come out and play with the Dolls now?

Raph: No! You just hugged one, Mikey! And we’re still not sure what it’s done to you!

Donnie: (Checking Mikey over) Nothing yet as far as I can tell.

Mikey: Nothing other than giving me AFFECTION AND HAPPINESS! Like that’s so bad, Raph!

Raph: We can’t let our guard down until we know what we’re dealing with! The last time we had a doll in the Lair, it turned out to be evil.

Mikey: Awww, these guys aren't evil! (Turns to the Dolls, talking baby talk) Awre youw?

Littlebug: (Nods)

Turtles: (Stare)

Turtles: (Glance at each other nervously)

Raph: Okay…so how evil are we talking exactly?

Littlebug: (Frowns, considering)

Littlebug: (Holds her hands a distance apart, which amounts to half a foot or so)

Leo: Eh, still less evil than Donnie.

Donnie: Eyeroll. You just can't appreciate genius.

Raph: I would feel better if we knew exactly what we are dealing with and just how evil these two are.

Mikey: Don't worry! Doctor Feelings can handle this! (Turns to Littlebug) So, what exactly do you mean by "evil"? (Does air quotes)

Littlebug: (Makes a gesture indicating a box and taking something and putting it in the box)

Mikey: You dumped a man in a dumpster?

Littlebug: (Holds up two fingers)

Mikey: AND his assistant?

Littlebug: (Nods, proudly)

Mikey: Well, that's not good but not so bad. But why?

Littlebug: (Frowns)

Littlebug: (Makes a comedically frowny face and gestures at her face)

Mikey: Uh huh…

Littlebug: (Stands up and strikes several poses then collapses to the floor)

Mikey: (Eyes widen)

Littlebug: (Sits up, taps her wrist but shakes her head)

Mikey: Oh.

Littlebug: (Points to herself and makes the gesture of the box again)

Mikey: (Looking less nice and more angry)

Littlebug: (Holds up three fingers and makes a sad face)

Mikey: (Expression is now stormy)

Raph: Uh…Mikey?

Mikey: (Pulls out weapon) And where did you say this guy lives again?

Raph: MIKEY NO!

----------------------------------

(Five minutes later)

Mikey: (Sans weapon and pouting, now sitting back in the "Quarantine Corner")

Raph: Okay, now that we've confiscated Mikey's weapons...what should we do about...(Looks down at Chaton)

Chaton: (Smiles up at Raph)

Raph: Yeah…and we're SURE they're not evil?

Mikey: Only to those who deserve it. (Darkly to self) And trust me, they deserve it.

Leo: Okay, anyone else worrying about Mikey's sudden turn to the dark side? And if the Dolls have hypnotic capabilities? No? Just me?

Chaton: (Climbs up on Raph)

Raph: ….uh hi?

Chaton: (Smiles)

Raph: (Staying very still)

Chaton: (Leans on Raph's plastron and purrs)

Raph: (Eyes wide and shiny)

Leo: Raph? You okay?

Raph: (Hugs Chaton) It's everything I've ever wanted.

Leo: Aaaand we've lost Raph. Looks like it's just you and me, Don…

Donnie: (Talking to Littlebug) And you think a death ray would be enough for that?

Littlebug: (Nods and points to a section of a map)

Donnie: I see! I could easily increase the output to scale for size of land mass…

Leo: …I have concerns. I have many concerns.

----------------------------------

(Meanwhile)

(With April and Marinette, the two are heading to the Lair.)

Marinette: I am so sorry about this! They're usually pretty well behaved, but sometimes they can get into mischief.

April: (Pats Marinette on the back) Well, that is what kids do. Still, I can't get over how you manage everything. Emotional terrorists. Magic. Monsters. Being a mom to magical dolls. And your own friends trying to take over the world on your behalf? The only way it could be tougher is if you're Ladybug.

Marinette: (Laughs nervously) Y-yeah...hahah.

April: No worries! They're with some of the best guys I know right now. I'm sure they're being responsible and not doing anything too crazy with the Dolls.

Marinette: (Hopeful) Really?

April: (Nervous smile, lying through her teeth) Totally!

----------------------------------

(At the Lair)

Leo: Okay. Recap. Dolls are magic. And possibly evil. Raph, Mikey, and Donnie are apparently hypnotized by their cuteness.

(The sound of lightning and evil cackling comes from Donnie's Lab)

Leo: ...no no, that's just Donnie on a Tuesday.

Leo: (Pulls out his phone and looks up the Ladyblog)

Leo: So it looks like the Dolls are...weirdly popular. And in high demand. Huh, no wonder they've got a Doll Army. And this "Light Lord" is their creator....and mother. (Thinking a plan) Hmmmm...

(Five minutes later)

(Leo is sitting across from Littlebug, )

Leo: Okay. So what IS your plan?

Littlebug: (Holds a picture of the world and words "Domination!")

Leo: Kind of figured. And where do my brothers fit in?

Littlebug: (Holds up picture of Littlebug and Donnie in mad scientist gear with a giant ray gun zapping things)

Leo: That sounds like Donnie, all right. Jerk was probably just waiting for the excuse, knowing him.

Littlebug: (Shifts the various papers and holds up a picture of Donnie wearing a sash that says "Minister of Science")

Leo: Yeah, he would love that. What about Mikey and Raph?

Littlebug: (Points to a picture of Mikey dangling a weird-looking blond man over a pit)

Leo: Ah. I'm not sure who that is, but it seems Mikey does. He looks happy about it, at least. And Raph?

Littlebug: (Points to a picture of a happy Raph covered in dolls—more than just Littlebug and Chaton. Apparently there were others?)

Leo: That can't be all?

Littlebug: (Pauses and turns over the picture to reveal another drawing of Raph having tea with a young lady with pigtails, both smiling underneath a banner that says "Leader Stress Free Zone")

Leo: …huh. Okay. May need to talk to Raph about that. And I'm guessing the girl is your Mom, right?

Littlebug: (Nods)

Leo: So…why all the rest of this then? What would you even do with the world once you conquered it?

Littlebug: (Holds up a picture of the Dolls giving the world to their Mom)

Leo: …okay, that's cute. But does she even WANT the world?

Littlebug: (Pauses)

Littlebug: (Frowns, thinking it over)

Leo: Or does she want you guys because you ARE her world?

Littlebug: (Pauses)

Littlebug: (Tears up)

Leo: Maybe you should give her a hug or something the next time you see her instead of a planet? I think owning the world would just stress her out more.

Littlebug: (Nods and looks up at him pleadingly)

Leo: Do you want me to call her?

Littlebug: (Nods)

Leo: Sure thing.

Littlebug: (Hugs Leo)

Leo: (Sighs)

(Pause)

Leo: Wait. Did I just save the world?

----------------------------------

(Later)

(April arrives with Marinette)

April: Hey guys! I brought their Mom!

Leo: So you're human?

Marinette: And you're a mutant.

Leo: I just thought a creator of living dolls would be a yokai or something.

Marinette: This is a crazy world we live in. I hope they weren't trouble.

Leo: Well they DID kinda try to bring my brothers into their world domination plans, but I managed to talk them out of it.

Marinette: What?! HOW?!

Leo: (Acting serious and dramatic) With the Power of Love.

Marinette: (Grabs Leo) No, seriously! HOW?!! I have been trying at length for AGES to get them and my friends to stop this insanity and you managed it in two hours!

Leo: Oh. Uh...sorry?

Marinette: (Releases him and takes a breath of relief) No. No. This is...this is great actually. Thank you!

Leo: Anytime.

Donnie: (Slams open door) DAMMIT, NARDO!

Leo: What?

Donnie: You talked them out of world domination! NOW what am I supposed to do with the Apocalypse Device?

Leo: ...why do you have an Apocalypse Device?

Donnie: For the World Domination Plan I was helping create for the Dark Lord!

Marinette: (Annoyed) I'm not a Dark Lord!

Donnie: (Ignores her, continuing to lament) My inventions would go down in history. AND I would become the royal scientist! But now the Dolls don't want to do it!

Leo: ...sucks.

Donnie: I created a whole PLAN, Leo! It was a 12 step process!

Marinette: But how do you take over the world if you destroy it? Wouldn't an apocalypse leave nothing left?

Donnie: ...oh. (Eyes widen) I have to go stop the timer! (Runs out of the room)

Leo: .....what?

Marinette: (Eyes wide)

April: ...so yeah. These are my friends!

Marinette: (To Leo) It's no wonder you knew how to deal with the kids. You must be used to it.

Leo: (Shrugs and refrains from mentioning his own antics) Yeah well y'know...

(Littlebug and Chaton run out and hug Marinette's legs. Raph and Mikey watch from the door, teary and sniffling at the reunion.)

Marinette: I've been worried sick about you two! (Hugs the Dolls)

Chaton and Littlebug: (Hug Marinette back because they didn't mean to make her worry, honest!)

Marinette: (To April and the others) It's been nice to meet all of you. Sorry about the trouble.

Mikey: It was no trouble!

Raph: Yeah. They're good kids. We wouldn't mind seeing them again.

Mikey: Speaking of, Littlebug mentioned a certain someone and I was hoping you could give more information on who it is. He needs a meeting with Dr. Delicate Touch.

Marinette: Who is—

Leo: And that's our cue to leave! (Pushes Marinette and April out) Thanks for everything! Lovely to meet you! Give a call if anything happens! Buh-bye!

----------------------------------

(Three days later)

(Leo gets a phone call.)

Leo: Hello?

Marinette: Hello, Leo. It's Marinette.

Leo: Oh hey. Something wrong?

Marinette: I wanted to say thanks again for derailing the whole "world domination" plans the Dolls had. But they seem to have picked it back up again.

Leo: What? Why?

Marinette: They wanted to do something nice for me and are convinced that I deserve the world.

Leo: Cute. Evil...but cute.

Mari: You seem immune to the chaos and talked them out of it once. Do you think you could do it again?

Leo: Well, I can try?

Mari: Please! I will give you a box of croissants if you do!

Leo: Sold!

(Fifteen minutes and a portal later)

Leo: (Enters room with a box of croissants and jam, and wearing a sash that says “Minister of Foreign Affairs”)

Mari: (Stares)

Leo: (Shrugs) So yeaaah…they made a better offer.

Mari: If you wanted jam you should have said something! I WOULD HAVE GIVEN YOU JAM!!!

And thus the struggle continues...

#ml fic #ml crossover #rottmnt #rottmnt crossover #marinette dupain cheng #dolls au #littlebug #chaton noir #rise leo #rise donnie #rise raph #rise mikey #if their cuteness cannot sway you their bribery will #dark lord marinette #light lord marinette #reluctant overlord marinette

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lifeofkaze · 1 year

Text

Firebug

I could write a whole essay about how and why I love you, @the-al-chemist, but honestly, I don't think I have to.

I think you know. No, actually, I know you know. You're the bestest. Happy Birthday 💛💛💛

A/N: Katriona Cassiopeia is the brainchild of the lovely @kc-and-co. Artemis Hexley belongs to @the-al-chemist, ofc. Warning: Language, dark noir world-weariness.

It’s a day like any other, really.

To be honest, most of them are. Same drag, same routine, day in, day out in this fucked up little world, where a new cigarette brand at the store is the biggest outrage and excitement people have seen in weeks.

My morning starts like most days do - wake up from the shouting in the streets; squint at the dirty midday light filtering through even dirtier windows; roll out of bed and find some breakfast consisting of cold coffee and a cigarette, both of which taste suspiciously like ash.

I spend my time running errands, helping my brother Bill with those business transactions of his that require a little more subtlety. From the change I find in his debtors’ pockets, I treat myself to lunch at Molly’s - lukewarm eggs, rubbery bacon and beans that are worse than my morning coffee. A bloody culinary dream.

I’m still thinking about Mama Molly’s scrambled eggs as the doors of the custody cell fall shut behind me. Office Corey Hayden, the portly policeman who has locked me up, says nothing, just scratches his fat belly with the doughnut crumbs on it and shakes his head at me.

“This is the fourth time this week, Weasley.”

“And it’s already Saturday. Disappointing, I know.”

As I said - a day like any other, really.

Officer Doughnut rolls his eyes and turns away. He has a football match playing on his small television in the corner. I bury my hands in my pockets, grunting as I chafe my knuckles on the scratchy fabric. The wounds still sting, but the bastard on the receiving end has had it coming. Thinking about him makes the rage in me flare up again. One scumbag down, a million more to go.

Like a giant fucking hydra.

Rubbing my fingers with the fresh blood against each other, I place one bloody thumbprint against the wall, right next to the one from two days prior. My own personal scoring record. I was here. I will come back.

Officer Hayden grunts. “‘Tis ain’t no fucking gallery, Weasley. Stop it.”

“And if not?”

The police officer grunts again and focuses on the match, turning the television so I can see what’s going on.

“Is it too much to watch some goddamn rugby, at least?” I hear a voice behind me, followed by two sharp clicking sounds. I turn.

Behind me sits a woman; a girl, even, it’s hard to tell. She looks small in her oversized coat, and her mane of unkempt hair. She’s scrawny, almost haggardly so. Mama Molly wouldn’t be able to resist stuffing her with food until she’d throw up from either amount, or taste, or both. The source of the clicking sound, I realise, is a silver lighter she holds in her hand. She flicks it open and closes it again, her eyes trained on the TV screen. I cock my brow at her.

“Not exactly the Ritz, ain’t it?”

“Dunno. Never been there.”

She stares at me, a challenge if I’ve ever seen one. Her eyes are strange, hazel, with a green ring around the middle. They remind me of a cat. How curious.

“And who would you be?” I ask, leaning against the bars of our shared confinement. “Never seen you around before.”

Her cat-eyes narrow. “Are you hitting on me?”

“Just trying to start a conversation.”

She snorts. “Don’t bother.”

“I’d listen to her, Weasley,” Officer Corey chimes in, putting his feet on top of a pile of paperwork that will never see completion. “Tried to bite me earlier.”

I turn my attention back to her. “Feisty, are you?”

She only glares.

“Whatever,” I shrug into her sullen silence. “I’m Charlie, by the way.”

More silence. I shrug again and concentrate on the match. Exeter City have just swindled themselves to a penalty. Suddenly, the cat-eye-woman speaks up.

“I’m Fire.”

“Feisty and confident.”

“No,” she says angrily, “that’s what they call me at work.”

“You have work?”

“Why are you so surprised?”

“You’re here, aren’t you?”

“So are you.”

The corners of my mouth twitch. “Maybe this is my job.”

A snort can be heard from Officer Corey’s corner. The woman gives me a hard look from her strange eyes.

“Are you taking the piss?”

“Anything to lighten the mood.”

I flash her a grin but receive only a frown in return.

“Forget it, Weasley,” Corey calls again, followed by a groan as Exeter’s striker kicks the ball straight past the goal. “She’s like a feral cat, that one.”

“Have yet to meet a cat who doesn’t like me.”

Silence again. Exeter have taken the failed penalty badly and - much to Officer Corey’s chagrin - are falling apart quickly. From time to time, I glance at the woman with the cat-eyes. She’s stopped playing with her lighter and is staring at the wall as if, by the sheer force of her bad mood alone, she could blow a hole in it. I sigh.

“You really are one fun cellmate, aren’t you?”

I almost think she has stopped responding to me altogether when she raises her chin and asks,

“Why are you here?”

“Animals,” I tell her, seeing her shoulders relax, even if only slightly. “I get them from illegal breeders who treat them like shit. Giving them a taste of their own medicine. That’s why I’m here.”

I’m not sure she believes me. Her face gives away nothing.

“That’s what you meant about the cats earlier?”

“I did.”

“And that’s all?”

“That’s all. What about you? Who did you piss off?”

“No one,” she responds stubbornly. “A misunderstanding.”

“Misunderstanding my arse,” Officer Corey huffs. “Picked her up by the harbour earlier.”

I frown. “Where the big fire was?”

“Right bloody next to it. And good thing we did. She’s with that Cassiopeia lady, or so I’ve heard. No good ever comes of that lot.”

Corey’s words pique my interest. I know KC and her girls. Despite what Officer Corey thinks, they’re good girls, all of them. The business they’re dealing in is beyond me, but everyone with half a brain cell left knows to leave them alone. They look like angels, but their kiss brings death.

I look at my cellmate.

Or fire.

I nod at the lighter she has taken out again. “That why they call you Fire?”

She tenses, and the lighter disappears in her pocket in an instant. “No.”

“Why then?”

“None of your business.”

“Well, I’ve got time.”

“Tough luck. I don’t.”

With that, she rises to her feet and walks past me to the door of our cell. Beyond the bars, a woman has appeared in the doorway to the police station, surrounded by a cloud of glamour and expensive perfume. Katriona ‘KC’ Cassiopeia takes a long look at the woman calling herself Fire, a resigned sigh leaving her blood-red lips. She pulls a slender purse from her handbag and places a big bundle of banknotes on Officer Corey’s desk. Thumbing through them with greasy fingers, he finishes his doughnut and gets up to unlock the cell.

“Off you go, Miss.”

KC’s eyes only graze me, but she gives me a nod of recognition anyway. I return it. Down in the drags, we’re all in the same boat, after all, one way or another.

“This is not what we agreed on, Artemis,” I hear KC hiss at her protégée, who stubbornly looks ahead. I swear I can see her non-existent fur bristling. “You’re a proper fire hazard at this point, you know that?”

“Way too small for a hazard,” I can’t help but comment. “More of a firebug, if you ask me.”

“Shame no one’s asking you, Weasley.” KC gives me a look. “Staying longer this time ‘round?”

“Only until my deposit arrives, I’m afraid.”

“Figures. I don’t have that much luck.”

The two women leave, quietly talking among themselves. I watch as they step outside into the drizzling rain, KC beneath a luxurious umbrella, her fiery friend hidden by the hood of her coat. As they vanish into the night, I see the quick flicker of a flame before that, too, disappears into the night.

I smirk to myself as I settle into my favourite corner of the cell. A new player, then.

Welcome to the game, little Firebug.

You’re in for a hell of a ride.

#hphm #hogwarts mystery #charlie weasley #artemis hexley #corey hayden #dark noir au #happy birthday al

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