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film-in-my-soul · 6 months

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Everybody's Talkin' | 2,273 | beetlesandstars / @beetlesandstarss

Summary: "This is just– bullshit!” Eddie yells. You’re bullshit. Oh. Eddie’s face changes then. Goes from livid and scared, to something worried, regretful.

Between The Lines | 2,486 | hitlikehammers / @hitlikehammers

Summary: “We need to talk.” Wayne wonders if this is the tone of voice the kid uses to fight the monsters they don’t talk about. “Say again?”

bet. | 2,835 | starryeyedjanai / @starryeyedjanai

Summary: "You need me to, to kiss you?" the guy asks, and this was a bad idea, the worst idea Robin's ever had. There's no way he's going to agree to this. "So, my friend-" he stops, looking back at Robin - she waves at them. He's trying so hard not to blush as he turns back to the guy and says, "She bet me that I couldn't get a guy to kiss me since it's my first time here. So I was wondering if you would kiss me, so I can win the bet." He's steeling himself for rejection, for this guy to tell him to fuck off or maybe have mercy and let him down gently by telling him he's taken. But he just smiles, tilting his head at Steve. "Why me?"

Indecent | 2,991 | NotEvenCloseToStraight / @not-close-to-straight

Summary: Steve was adorable wearing Eddie’s clothes. He was stupidly sexy wearing Eddie’s clothes. Steve was unfairly breaking Eddie’s brain wearing his clothes and it was just downright indecent. “Steve.” Eddie swallowed hard and lowered his voice. “Steve, go change.” “What?” Steve’s nose wrinkled when he frowned. “Why?” “Go change.” “But I’m comfortable.” “Go. Change.” “Eddie, I don’t understand--” “PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME!” Eddie planted his feet and pointed violently at the crop top. “SO HELP ME STEVE HARRINGTON!”

Please see below for more recommendations!

something so pretty | 3,087 | cranberrymoons / @cranberrymoons

Summary: Eddie raises Steve's hand to brush a kiss over his knuckles, then catches him around the waist again, swaying them back and forth to the rhythm of a Bangles song coming from the radio. “I said you look pretty, and I meant it. Deal with it.” Steve feels a reluctant smile pull at the corners of his mouth. “Really?”

abyss kiss | 3,145 | beetlesandstars / @beetlesandstarss

Summary: Steve stands as if frozen, letting everything churning inside simmer to a slow boil. He wishes suddenly, desperately, that he’d stayed with Robin. He doesn’t know when they’re meant to regroup. He doesn’t know anything. A shuddering breath leaves his lips, in such a rush he feels light-headed. He puts a hand on the wall, trying to plant his feet, trying to fucking think, but the world is turning too quickly, and he’s spinning, spinning, spinning–

Doing it for science (not really) | 3,181 | corrodedbisexual (mishabawlins) / @corrodedbisexual

Summary: The last thing Eddie expected to see in his life was Steve Harrington, comfortably laid back on his bed, fidgeting with a condom wrapper.

Flagging Your Attention | 3,391 | starsdontsleep

Summary: Eddie spots a scrap of material sticking out the back of Steve’s pocket during a party and he has to know; is the guy he desperately wants actually flagging?

Black Dog Sin | 3,668 | grumpyhedgehogs

Summary: Vecna raises Eddie to bring about ruin to those left in Hawkins. Things don't go as planned.

Your skin and bones turn into something beautiful (You know I love you so) | 4,209 | ChristinMKay / @transmascsteveharrington

Summary: Steve Harrington is born with a scream on his lips and so much love in his being that his body is covered in it. An abundance of moles, freckles, and birthmarks are speckled across his skin, painting him in constellations and stardust and affection. The nurses and doctors are congratulating Steve’s parents as they place him in the arms of his mother. They say he is blessed. Lived so many lives filled with people who loved him so much that the press of their lips against his skin had to echo through time and leave a mark.

and i don't want the world to see me ('cause I don't think that they'd understand) | 4,499 | mcdynamite

Summary: Steve Harrington has had a lot of sex. He's not, like, trying to brag about it, or anything. Frankly, he's not even sure it's something he would want to brag about in the first place. It's just an objective fact. The sky is blue. The Earth is round. Water is wet. And Steve Harrington has had a lot of sex. Which is...well, a little bit bizarre, considering the fact that he's not entirely convinced he actually enjoys it most of the time.

Apple Pie (Baked Just Right) | 4,635 | ParadimeShifts / @paradimeshifts7

Summary: Outside, Eddie is standing on his front step, his hair tied loosely back in a knot, clad in nothing but a pair of jeans and a faded t-shirt. And balanced in his hands is…Steve guesses it’s supposed to be a pie. The crust is all fucked up, looks a little like the puckered expanse of Eddie’s hip. It’s the most beautiful pie Steve’s ever seen.

color me in danger | 4,755 | SolariaLunar21 / @likewolveswerunwild

Summary: The first time Eddie remembers a major change in the color of his meter he’s 11 years old. For most of his life the bar on his wrist has sat firmly in the green sometimes on very rare occasions darkening to a green blue color. That is until that day when he’s 11 and he watches it change to yellow for the first time.

Play It Cool | 4,972 | BoudicaMuse / @spinmewriteround

Summary: The title of the video reads “CORRODED COFFIN AT LIVE NATION ARENA COVERS…” The band name sounds vaguely familiar, and he thinks they might be some mid-level rock band, or maybe they're punk. Not Steve’s thing at all, he couldn't name one of their songs with a gun to his head. Whatever they’re covering is cut off, but he can guess. "I'm really not in the mood for this." “Trust me, you’re going to love it.”

breakfast in bed (kisses for me), love can make you sing | 6,307 | luxeberries

Summary: The first thing he registers is Eddie. The second thing he registers is Eddie is wearing his sweater. The third thing is Dustin Henderson, sitting on the kitchen counter. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

Bad News First, Eddie | 9,618 | alittleoff

Summary: "Bad news, good news? I don't know man, the news is I could have loved you." Steve talks to Eddie Munson's headstone in the cemetery. Life goes on, sorta.

The Courtship of Eddie Munson | 10,437 | AnnetheCatDetective

Summary: After a couple of terrifying but illuminating trips through the Upside Down, Steve is determined to be the best boyfriend ever to Eddie. Sure, there are complications-- Eddie's recovery is going to be a long road, and it's not easy to court a guy who's unconscious. They never actually got to have a first date or even talk about their expectations for their new relationship. Eventually they'll have to figure out how to come out to the people close to them about it. But he knows he has Robin in his corner, and Eddie's uncle Wayne is surprisingly accepting, so he's confident they'll get through the bumps in the road. They've dealt with worse, right? The complication Steve didn't account for? Eddie's got no idea they're together.

exeunt ; enter stage | 10,576 | stardustcoral / @stardustcoral

Summary: Nancy inhaled slowly as she took a meaningful step towards him. Steve's eyes flickered back over to her instinctively, and he got a firsthand view of how her face had crumpled, eyes wide and shining and worried. "Steve," Nancy said, slow, gentle, quiet, like she was trying to calm a cornered wild animal. "None of us said those things." Steve's mouth opened, words piling on the tip of his tongue: what, so I was just hallucinating, then? he wanted to ask, nearly did ask, and then he realized—heart stopping in his chest and the floor very suddenly feeling like it had been ripped out beneath him—that was exactly what was happening. Steve's jaw shut with a click. "Oh," Steve breathed shakily. Oh, fuck.

Anywhere, Anytime | 10,853 | AidaRonan / @aidaronan

Summary: Eddie wakes from a nightmare about the bats. Again. About a week ago, Steve Harrington gave him his number with instructions to call if he needed anything. Said number is tacked on Eddie's wall under his Anthrax poster. 555-9878 -Steve H. But it's 3:17 a.m. and Eddie probably shouldn't call. Definitely shouldn't call.

It's Not a Big Deal | 11,708 | AidaRonan / @aidaronan

Summary:Eddie survives, but his entire life is locked away in the Upside Down forever (his books, his DnD stuff, his guitar.) Everything that wasn't on Eddie when Steve carried him into the ER, gone. So naturally Steve starts giving him things. Handing Eddie back those little outward markers of who he is.

Meet-Cute in the Metal Pit | 14,926 | pez_the_platypus

Summary: "You were in theatre in high school, weren't you," Steve said, but he was charmed nonetheless. "Was it the eloquent prose or grand gestures of chivalry that gave me away?" Eddie simpered. "Actually," Steve reached out without thinking, wrapped the one loose tendril of Eddie's hair around his finger, and gave it a sharp tug, "It was the hair."

All That You Ever Wanted From Me Was Sweet Nothing | 15,283 | t1red_gay

Summary: “'I’m in love with you,' Eddie says, so casual, like it isn’t 3PM on a Tuesday in the middle of a Family Video in Bumfuck, Indiana. Like they’re somewhere else, like he’s someone else. Like it’s nothing extraordinary."

The Worst Mixtape Ever Made | 17,999 | nbfutureboy / @futureboy-ao3

Summary: “It’s a gift, so you gotta listen to the whole thing, okay? I think-- I think it’s got what it takes.” There’s an art to making a mixtape - and Steve Harrington has decidedly ignored all semblance of art in creating a mixtape for Eddie Munson. Too bad Eddie’s fascinated with how impressively terrible his song choices are.

and it all comes down to you | 18,638 | heartofwinterfell / @nancywheeeler

Summary: Eddie Munson’s no hero. Too bad the universe—or whatever’s gonna be left of it—didn’t get the memo.

November Paramedic | 25,662 | BackyardOwl

Summary: Eddie has had his fair share of fantasies, but none of them involved fucking a paramedic. Until two years ago. That's when the "sexy men at work"-calendar got added to his porn stash and orgasms as he knew them changed forever. All the men in the calendar are hot, but none of them hold a candle to the paramedic. He's got this look in his eyes, this slant to his mouth. Like he knows he's the hottest guy in it. And everything is fine. Everything is great. Eddie's been single forever and he has no idea where he's headed in life, but he's fine. At least until he's collateral damage in a bar fight after a gig, and none other than his sexy November-paramedic arrives to treat his wounds.

hold me now, i need relief | 25,805 | ToEdenandBackAgain

Summary: It’s probably going to go down in history as the worst kiss Steve Harrington ever got, but Eddie doesn’t give a fuck. He isn’t going to get another chance so he’s working with what he’s got. It’s less of a kiss, and more of a slide of lips, wet with blood and tears but he feels Harrington’s grip tighten on the back of his shirt and he pulls back. He reaches up with the hand he can still feel and pushes back a strand of hair that had fallen in Steve’s face, smearing blood along his temple as he does. “Sorry. Couldn’t die without knowing what that felt like.”

I've seen your face before, my friend, but I don't know if you know who I am | 26,952 | HMSLusitania / @hmslusitania

Summary: At the end of it all, to fix everything, the Hawkins crew had to go back to 1983 and prevent the first gate from ever opening. After that, they've got a chance to lead normal lives -- from November 1983 onward.

Blood on My Name | 28,448 | VTHX (V_Haley)

Summary: Tuesday, November 8th, 1983: Steve un-dies in hell.

The Enormous Upside to Losing Everything | 35,886 | Stressed_Depressed_Lemonzest

Summary: “Oh for fuck’s sake,” that mysterious someone cursed, “Why don’t you watch where you put your goddamn feet-” They seemed to recognise him and stopped in their tracks. Brown eyes blinked owlishly at Steve as he in turn took in the sight of Eddie Munson. “Harrington,” Eddie greeted, voice a mixture of surprise and suspicion. “Munson,” Steve returned.

don't go wastin your emotions | 51,650 | kissesforcas

Summary: "Steve 'the Hair' Harrington, a rage-filled barbarian, who knew?" Eddie says, like its a compliment, like Steve has ANY idea what that means. "Uh, I knew. Obviously." Steve says, wisely, even though he clearly didn't. "Anyway, do you think we could eat a demobat? Or would we turn into some kind of monstrous freak? I'm starving, and Dustin's cheese crackers are not enough to get me on my feet again." "What difference does it make to me if I'm a human freak or a monster one?" Eddie shrugs, and Steve butts his shoulder up against Eddie. It's meant to be brotherly, maybe friendly, but it's too soft. Felt like something he might have done before slinging an arm around a girl's shoulders. "You're not a freak." Steve says, and finds he means it. Eddie's eyes, when he looks at Steve, are curious. "No?" "No."

Call My Number (and Call Me Yours) | 53,663 | novacorpsrecruit / @novacorpsrecruit

Summary: “Fire department is on the way. Stay on the line with me, okay?” A buzz of a radio came over the headset. “Fire station 3 responding.” “Damn,” Eddie whistled. Chrissy looked over at Eddie. “This guy’s voice is hot.” Chrissy’s eyes grew wide. The voice cleared his throat. “Just wait until you see my face. It’s not too bad either.”

the lathe | 82,547 | palmviolet / @palmviolet

Summary: "This time, do it right. This time Eddie won’t bleed out in his arms, in anyone’s arms. This time, Steve will do it right."

Master Reclist · Personal Masterlist · Blog Nav.

#steddie #steve/eddie #steddie reclist #fanfic reclist #reclist #stranger things reclist

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antianakin · 9 months

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i loved Burn the Ships, so i’m begging for more fics in which order 66 happens differently or is even fully averted that are pro-jedi order (preferably with lots of obi-wan but i love all the other jedi so not a high priority)!! it’s sooo hard to find ones that don’t force the order to change their ways or excuse anakin’s bad choices or like make him the one who prevents order 66 super easily. thanks!

I can absolutely do this, this is RIGHT in my wheelhouse!

I'm taking this ask to mean fics that specifically deal with how Order 66 changes or is averted, not just fics set in a happy fix-it world. For the purposes of this prompt, I also am not including fics where there's only a SLIGHT change from the canon Order 66 (like a Padme lives AU or Tatooine Husbands AU, for example).

Order 66 Happens Differently:

Knightrise by deviantaccumulation (incomplete fic)

Greater Than Your Hoarded Gold series by Quietbang (incomplete series, completed first fic)

When Night Falls series by Kiwikipedia (incomplete series, completed fics, not Anakin friendly)

Into Tomorrow by Ravenclaw_Paredhel (completed fic)

only following orders by grumpyhedgehogs (completed fic, this could ARGUABLY go in the other category but the fic isn't long enough to really know so I'm leaving it here)

No Order 66:

The Temple of Hope series by Zarz (incomplete series, completed first fic)

let the river in by saltsanford (completed fic, part of a series but can be read alone, more clone focused but is still Jedi positive)

under the wide and starry sky series by wrennette (completed fics, incomplete series)

in our hearts some ancient song by whimsical images (completed fic)

That's Not How It Happened (This Is How It Happened) by cacodaemonia (completed fic, part of an ongoing series that is more clone focused)

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Time Travelers by blackkat (incomplete fic, I assume it'll avert Order 66 eventually lol)

Consumed by Greed by virdant (completed fic, not Anakin friendly)

Commander Fox's Ultimate Bucket List by blackkat (completed fic, not Anakin friendly)

that was a spring of storms by blackkat (incomplete fic, not Anakin friendly)

and the tide rises, the tide falls series by blackkat (incomplete series, completed first fic)

The Sun Swings East by kj_feybarn (completed fic)

and love unbolts the dark by blackkat (completed fic)

Nonna and the Coruscant Guard by Argentee (completed fic, clone centric)

The Legend of Liob by killbothtwins (completed fic)

For Everything a Season by galateaGalvanized (completed fic, smutty)

hide the wolves of sleep (and mask the grave) by blackkat (incomplete fic)

And There's Nothing I Wouldn't Do (For You) by Armin_05 (completed fic, clone centric)

The Ground Beneath Us by stolen_pen_name23 (completed fic, Anakin centric)

Conviction by SassySnowperson (completed fic)

All the Monsters That You've Made (Are Coming Home to Roost) by Dragonstorm (completed fic)

luminous beings are we series by blackkat (ongoing series, all fics completed)

The Vode by RoseThorn14 (incomplete fic)

Capacitance by Jessepinwheel (completed fic)

#star wars #obi-wan kenobi #jedi #pro jedi #jedi appreciation #fic #fic recs #no order 66

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greyias · 2 months

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Since I'm currently stuck in Sandrock Hell, figured I'll just start doing some pic spams and regaling you with the tales of how I've broken the game. Approaching end game, and my little builder Aria, who has been a hopeless flirt (inadvertently breaking hearts left and right because she thought flirting with certain NPCs was really funny), has finally met her match.

What's funny is, this romance sort of started as a joke because I kept accidentally clicking on the bounty hunter poster every time I was attempting to go into the Commerce Guild, and @grumpyhedgehog kept saying that Aria was lusting over it each morning to psych herself up before having to face Yan to grab her daily commissions.

Then Logan went and robbed a train and apparently that sealed the deal that they were meant to be because of my long history of romancing train menacing npcs

Anyway he also tried to... *looks at smudged writing on hand* blow her up why does this keep happening to my blondies and they had a knife fight or two. She punched him so hard at one point his mask fell off.

Anyway they're married now.

#mtas #my time at sandrock #mtas logan #mtas builder #well sort of #they're married but haven't had the wedding #because marriage works differently after the apocalypse #grey's my time tag

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terezis · 1 year

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Curious to know your fave fics but I’m personally a big Azula stan 👀

azula-centric:

to be sublime by hierophantasic (non-bender azula au)

on top of the world by mindbending

sifu azula by neuronary

a room at the end of the world by blossominribcage

the enemy you can't live without by wintersnufkin

asymmetry by henrymercury

in miniature by neuronary

zuko-centric:

towards the sun by muffinlance

little zuko vs. the world by muffinlance

where mighty oaks do fall by witchofendor

salvage by muffinlance

mountains and badgermolehills by glass_onion

years by grumpyhedgehogs

kintsugi by discordiansamba

the problem with zuko by avocadolove

azula and zuko -centric:

where the stars do not take sides by witchofendor

life in eden by witchofendor

as the world should be by muffinlance

to open every door to night, to meet each rising sun by erisenyo

misc:

the courage that my mother had by damkianna

blood, milk, and oil by howlikeagood

what a mom does by dawen

#it was honestly rly hard to narrow it down this much #u want more later i got more i got recs for days #LOL #Anonymous #fic recs

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veryace-ficrecs · 9 months

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Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano Fic Recs

I'm posting this today for @theadmiralbitch happy birthday!!! 🎂

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)

a worthwhile endeavour by wrennette -Rated G

They were currently at nearly 36 hours since Obi-Wan last slept, which meant that tonight, they'd be breaking out the big guns. Ahsoka knew the routine by now, the major points practiced enough that she could improvise a little to keep her Master from catching on. Co-Commanders Tano and Cody have a plan.

Mall Rat Ahsoka by phoenixyfriend - Rated G

Ahsoka falls into the mall fountain, gets fished out by a security guard, and gets Obi-Wan to lie and claim he's her father to get out of trouble. It works.

Diplomacy by Phosphorescent - Rated G

Obi-Wan and Ahsoka's mission to Tatooine does not go according to plan. Anakin's really going to be sorry he missed this... “The Mighty Jabba has been looking for a new dancer ever since our last one… required replacement,” the droid said. It moved closer, head swiveling back and forth between the two Jedi. “You are a fit specimen. Please report to the tailor droid for a fitting of your dancing outfit.” Ahsoka had her lightsaber in hand and ignited practically before the droid had finished speaking.

The Thread That Binds Us by Did_you_see_the_light_in_my_heart - Rated G

Ahsoka is running out of time to get her formal robes for the Yearly Ball For All Sentient Beings and no matter how hard she tries, she can't seem to get Anakin's attention long enough to help her solve the problem. But maybe someone else can help her. “Tell me, my dear, what’s troubling you?” Master Kenobi asks. She lowers her fork and stops, swallowing hard. “I… I don’t have anything to wear for the ball,” she says quietly. Set early in Ahsokas apprenticeship. Relationships are still fresh.

Accepting Emotion by LazarusII - Rated G

Dealing with the stress and anxiety of being a prospective Padawan, Ahsoka Tano struggles to manage her emotions. Obi-Wan Kenobi finds her practicing in the dojo, confidence in tatters. His words make all the difference.

Chosen, not assigned by Lysore - Rated G

"It looks like our problems are solved. Fresh troops, new supplies, and perhaps they brought my new Padawan with them," Obi-Wan had said. Though there seemed to be a misunderstanding regarding the identity of the Master of said Padawan.

carried in your heart by grumpyhedgehogs - Rated G

“I am always with you.” Obi-Wan tells her. Her heart thumps painfully in her chest as her grandmaster rests his palm over it. The organ betrays her, beats away like it can crack her ribs apart and slip between them to leap into Obi-Wan’s chest and stay there with him, always. Slowly, tentatively, Ahsoka lets Obi-Wan guide her to rest her own palm over his heart. It pulses under her fingers, reminding Ahsoka at least one Jedi still lives on. “You are always with me.”

Negotiator's Garden by NyeLung - Rated G

The curious thing is that the clone troopers keep bringing Master Kenobi those cuttings, he accepts them gratefully and then he puts them in soil and waters them and they don't wither and die. They should wither and die. That Alderaani snow zherry cannot withstand hyperspace travel. That Kashyyyk begonia is carnivorous and what Master Kenobi has put into the soil as roots are actually the tentacles it uses to catch prey. The oneshot where Obi-Wan is most likely some kind of space fae, Ahsoka is a botany nerd and there's debatably sentient plants.

these battle scars (don't look like they're fading) by CallToMuster - Rated T

If there was one thing Ahsoka knew about her grandmaster, it was that he hated medical treatment and those who gave it. She just never knew why.

Waiting and Learning by otherhawk - Rated G

During a brief period of time when Ahsoka Tano is working with the 212th under Obi-Wan Kenobi, Ahsoka takes part in a mission to obtain separatist codes. Unfortunately the mission involves a lot of downtime without much entertainment as they wait for an ambush. Along the way Ahsoka gets to know her grandmaster better and makes some new friends.

#ahsoka tano #obi wan kenobi #ahsoka tano and obi wan kenobi #ahsoka fic rec #anakin skywalker #veryace recs #ao3 fic recs #fanfic recs #ao3 #star wars #star wars clone wars #star wars prequels #star wars fic recs

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taizi · 9 months

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hm. I think you've finally made me understand why people enjoy steddie. with just two reblogged text posts. and now I can't go back to ignorance I need to voraciously consume everything I can (do you have any recs)

do i ever !

sir stephen strider finds his suzy by lesbianrobin

things to come by birthdaycandles

The Shire's Storyteller and bled out without a trace by loveinhawkins

Sanctuary by SpicedSage

this is your home. these are your people. by oaseas

home to you by nsowlwrites97

two bros chilling in the mall (ten yards apart 'cause we're not gay) by Gues and peytra

a last chance power drive and try to make this life my own by teiresias

sos by ikarakie

he was turned to steel by idlyfretting

Down in a Dead Man's Town by holyfudgemonkeys

chat with you, baby (flirt a little, maybe) by desiccatedwithering

Let them eat metal by eloquent_fairy

Bloodletting by grumpyhedgehogs

exeunt ; enter stage by stardustcoral

(something happens and I'm) head over heels by GibbousLunation

#blah #anonymous #fic recs

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megamindsupremacy · 1 year

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Star Wars Fic Recs (Part 2)

capture the flag by artemis_neardos It's all fun and games, but a good portion of the galaxy is fairly certain that at least part of the GAR has quietly lost its mind. Obi-Wan isn't completely sure what's going on. His men are having fun and no ones getting hurt, so he has no problem playing along.

scraps by grumpyhedgehogs

Scraps of fic about a Cody who wakes up from Order 66 in the worst way possible: watching Obi-Wan Kenobi fall to Vader's blade. Scraps of fabric tie each fic together.

a beautiful day by artemissol

Ahsoka gets to say goodbye to her oldest and dearest friend, a luxury neither is often afforded.

Bonds broken by snap_crackle_spock

A former Master and Padawan walk into a space cantina.

The Master asks:

How do you break a Force bond?

Easy, the Padawan says, break all the trust that came before it.

Turn my sorrow into treasured gold by cosmicocean

“It might be better for you to die,” Obi-Wan muses as she holds her children in her arms. Padmé looks up at him and arches an eyebrow.

“I didn’t mean literally,” he clarifies.

“I know what you meant. I’m thinking about it.”

Padmé survives childbirth, dies as far as the rest of the galaxy is concerned, takes her children with Obi-Wan, and runs.

Pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow.

The grace of madness by lightningstarborne

Based on this prompt: Maybe Obi-Wan was tortured and captured on a early mission with Qui-Gon. Obi ends up acting like River(Firefly) by the time they are rescued/escape. The Council urges Qui-Gon to get a new apprentice because Obi-Wan will never be the way he was, they think he can't become a Jedi. Qui-Gon refuses, he believes Obi can still become a Jedi despite his mental instability.

Over the years Qui-Gon and Yoda are the only ones who can understand Obi and are both comfortable in his presence.

The Phantom Menace happens. Yoda approves Obi in training Anakin, the others on the Council disagree, but Yoda is da Boss.

How does Anakin do with Obi-Wan? Does Anakin still become Darth Vader?

Shenanigans by missteavee

You'd THINK that clones can tell each other apart. But apparently all it takes to fool even your best buddy is to dye your hair to the regular brown and wear shiny armor.

Rex has a laugh, Ponds can't believe these dummies.

The end of all things by husborth

Obi-Wan returns from a solo mission to a horrifying, terrifying, awful discovery; his fifteen-year-old padawan is now taller than him. -

A walk on part in the war by victoria_p

Vader presents Ahsoka with an ultimatum -

The honey between our shadows

A decade after the dawn of the Empire, Purge Trooper CC-2224 discovers a former Jedi general hiding on Tatooine. But the traitor isn’t what he expected: wisecracking and magnanimous—and heartbroken. And then there’s the unnerving way he looks at CC-2224, like he’s seen his nightmares and been acquainted with every blaster scar on his body.

Or: a roundabout justification for why Darth Vader never finds Obi-Wan and Luke on Tatooine.

#mads posts #fic recs #fic rec list #star wars fic recs #star wars fic rec list

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tuawards · 1 year

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Time to vote like there’s no tomorrow!

To participate, please fill in this survey.

You have until 27th March (23:59 PT)

The process is entirely anonymous: no email addresses, accounts or names required

Once sent, you cannot make any changes to your votes

You can vote for up to 3 stories per category, or skip whichever categories you don’t want to vote for

Don’t forget to leave a kudo and/or comment on the stories you vote for!

Under the cut are the nominated stories you'll be voting on. Thanks to everyone who sent in their nominations! :)

CATEGORY: Best Flash Fiction

Haunt This House and Make It a Home by Klonopincubus – https://archiveofourown.org/works/20526626

Anew by Val_Creative – https://archiveofourown.org/works/17978840

under my skin, it crawls, it weeps by PsychicBananaSplit – https://archiveofourown.org/works/17856305?view_adult=true

CATEGORY: Best One Shot

taking it slow (that's how it goes) by Inkrivers – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18432113

(i heard a rumor) i put a band-aid on a bullet wound by telm_393 – https://archiveofourown.org/works/19056268

spitting distance by sauntering_down – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18125234

On Your Lips by Val_Creative – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18147575

An deinen glühend heißen Wangen verbrenne ich meine Finger by Brain_Brainson – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18044684

who gives a damn (about the family you come from) by iamnotalizard – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18355721

CATEGORY: Best Multi-Chapter

traumaversary by WeWalkADifferentPath – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18226634?view_full_work=true

Tailspin by chiiyo86 –https://archiveofourown.org/works/18501085/chapters/43842322

7 Times Diego Dropped & 7 People Who Took Care of Him by ahargreeves (soufflegirl123) –https://archiveofourown.org/works/18137606?view_full_work=true

Death Can't Stop Our Happy Ending by ElliotOrion –https://archiveofourown.org/works/18994630?view_full_work=true

And Baby Makes 8 by Katydid_99 –https://archiveofourown.org/works/18415853?view_full_work=true

CATEGORY: Best Series

picture book by Gin_Juice – https://archiveofourown.org/series/1335751

after klaus got out of the mausoleum by PsychicBananaSplit – https://archiveofourown.org/series/1283660

trans diego & child five by iamnotalizard – https://archiveofourown.org/series/1351258

CATEGORY: Best Gen

Ink by felldownthelist – https://archiveofourown.org/works/19320274?view_full_work=true

I Think We're (Not) Alone Now by grumpyhedgehogs – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18711862

catch and release by sauntering_down – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18098921

Tonight We Went Somewhere Important by telm_393 – https://archiveofourown.org/works/17987285

CATEGORY: Best Drama

spirit petals by JkWriter – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18398069?view_adult=true

Wouldn't You Love To Love Her by Val_Creative – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18054839

On This Day In History by telm_393 – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18332960

This Song and Dance, It's Muscle Memory by Now by telm_393 – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18239171

CATEGORY: Best AU

Crunchy Leaves & Cuties by JjdoggieS – https://archiveofourown.org/works/23416579

An Exquisite Form of Self Destruction by Starrstruck_64 – https://archiveofourown.org/works/20465252

The Fools' Journey by sweetstuff – https://archiveofourown.org/works/23676433

CATEGORY: Best NSFW

Can't Sleep by Val_Creative – https://archiveofourown.org/works/18369521

All Creatures Great And Small by TechnicolorRevel – https://archiveofourown.org/works/20505989

Menace by TechnicolorRevel – https://archiveofourown.org/works/19970566

The life of Feral Five and his lovely wife by Marble_Spider – https://archiveofourown.org/series/1331969

CATEGORY: Best Author

Gin_Juice –https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gin_Juice/pseuds/Gin_Juice

telm_393 –https://archiveofourown.org/users/telm_393/pseuds/telm_393

#The Umbrella Academy #Umbrella Academy #TUA #UA #TUAwards #TUAwards S1 #voting #TUAwards vote

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quarter-past-eleven · 1 year

Link

Fic Rec

After a narrow escape from the Upside Down, it's hard to find your footing.

Or: Steve Harrington deals with his terrible parents, Robin Buckley refuses to leave her best friend to fend for himself, and Eddie Munson simply will not stop lending Steve his clothes for no reason Steve can see.

(Or: Steve cares too hard and too deeply to not have someone else care the same way about him. Everyone knows this except, apparently, for Steve.)

Had me giggling and kicking my feet I swear. Also, just spot on characterisation. Just. Wow.

#stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #robin buckley #(not as a wingman for once)#fic rec #steddie fic #ao3

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orangesideirrational · 1 year

Text

#malevolent #fanfics

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uniasus · 2 years

Text

fic rec! TUA, S1 AU. 7K

Summary: Ben protects his sister from beyond the grave. Klaus is totally on board.

Comments: I might have rec'd this one before, when I sent searching for fics after S1. Ao3 at least tells me I left kudos. But regardless, this is a great S1 retelling focused on Ben. Ben splits his time between Vanya and Klaus, so he sees everything that's going on, but when Leonard comes into the picture Klaus disappears and so all he can really do is watch things get worse. I also love the little world building elements - that sometimes Klaus is so high he can't see Ben, that Vanya watches Allison's movies as she cries eating Five's sandwiches. There's so much brotherly love in this fic. I adore it.

#fic rec #tua #the umbrella academy #ben hargreeves #grumpyhedgehogs

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film-in-my-soul · 6 months

Text

your eyes on me (i think i'll cause a scene) | 1,658 | BackyardOwl

Summary: Chrissy drags Eddie to a basketball game, where they end up seated next to a hottie and his bored girlfriend. Then the kiss cam settles on them, and things get interesting.

feel the beat within my heart | 1,859 | wearing_tearing / @wearing-tearing

Summary: “You’re wearing leather pants,” Steve says, feeling like he’s having a stroke. Eddie drops his arms to his sides and frowns at him. “Are you having a stroke?” “No,” Steve replies and then corrects himself. “Maybe?”

I Wish I Knew You Wanted Me | 1,915 | indelicate / @steddielations

Summary: “Is everything okay?” Steve offers gently, “If you need to borrow some money or use my washer or something then—” “No, no that’s not it,” Eddie shakes his head, “I don’t need anything like that, I swear.” “So then… Why do you keep taking my clothes, Eddie?” Eddie lets out a small laugh, almost sad, a little bitter, “You’re really gonna make me say it, Harrington?”

Rental Return | 2,087 | zade / @racetrackthehiggins

Summary: Two hours. Two entire hours Eddie had been sitting outside Family Video with his hand caught in the video return slot, waiting for anyone to show up and open the fucking store. His fingers felt swollen and were throbbing but his rings were caught on the slot and his fingers were trapped clutching the copy of This Is Spinal Tap he had been hoping to return on his way to school. And now it had been two hours, Eddie was late for class, and he had to fucking piss.

Deaf to the Dead Man's March | 2,685 | Carerra_os / @jellyfishloveletterghosts

Summary: Eddie uses his song to bring the crew of a passing ship to their end, his song doesn't reach them all and he goes to investigate.

devil made me do it (gotta admit i had fun) | 2,847 | grumpyhedgehogs

Summary: Eddie returns as Kas the Betrayer, fully under Vecna’s control and hellbent on destroying Hawkins. Unfortunately for Vecna, Steve Harrington intervenes.

APPLEJACK | 2,979 | kocasoda / @kocasoda

Summary: “Alright, Harrington,” Eddie says appreciatively. "But I still don't believe this vampire thing. Robin,” he calls to the comedy section, “I’m calling your bluff." "How much?" "Five bucks." "Deal. Show him your teeth, Steve." “Hey,” Steve objects, “I'm worth way more than five dollars.” "Sure you are." Eddie reaches out and grasps Steve’s jaw. “Now let's see those pearls."

Please see below for more recommendations!

i'm feeling devious (you're looking glamorous) | 3,127 | fivecenturiesverse

Summary: Steve Harrington is secretly a nerd. He's also, in Eddie's opinion, a massive dick. (Or: five times nobody but Eddie believes that Steve is a giant nerd, and one time he tells everyone else.)

Four Seasons In One Day | 3,452 | beetlesandstars / @beetlesandstarss

Summary: Christmas, Steve decided a long time ago, sucks. Being the only one in Hawkins without a family to celebrate with sucks. So, box of cookies in hand, Steve knocks on Eddie Munson's door.

Hey Santa | 3,598 | ThirdEye1234 / @thirdeye1234

Summary: “So if you’re feeling generous . . .” Eddie leans in closer, one hand coming up so his fingers are brushing the bare skin of Steve’s neck and his lips are grazing Steve’s ear—or they would be, if the stupid Santa hat wasn’t in the way. Steve can’t decide if he’s relieved or disappointed about that. “ . . . I wouldn’t be opposed to finding a gift-wrapped Steve Harrington under my tree come Christmas morning.”

your flames are flames that kiss me dead | 4,156 | fivecenturiesverse

Summary: Five times someone (mostly Eddie) kisses Steve and one time Steve kisses Eddie.

Shovel Talks | 4,397 | unkreativstermensch / @unkreativstermensch

Summary: “Oh,” Steve says. Then again, “oh,” a little quieter. His expression changes; from confusion to something pained almost. “Mr Munson, I don’t…” he takes a deep breath, his voice a little shaky as he continues. “I don’t think he…I don’t think he likes me like that.” He doesn’t say “it’s not like that.” Neither does he say “I’m not like that.” That’s the first thing Wayne notices.

if i was brave (i'd climb up to you on the mountain) | 4,485 | hexiewrites / @hexiewrites

Summary: Eddie Munson just wants to go for a walk with his daughter. That shouldn't be too much to ask. Unfortunately, Eddie Munson is a klutz. Luckily, park ranger Steve Harrington is nearby to help out.

always ten feet below (and just out of reach) | 4,954 | stellarpoint (pettifogger) / @heybluechild

Summary: Steve’s door is still cracked open, but he opens the window anyway. Cool air rushes into the room, along with the general smell of Eddie: cigarette smoke, cheap body spray, and maybe just a little bit of weed. If Steve gets butterflies just from that, he’ll never admit to it. “What the hell are you doing?” he whispers. “What do you think? Rescuing the princess from her tower.” Steve stares. Eddie grins. “Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair.” Steve’s stare moves into glaring territory. “Okay, seriously, you gotta let me in. My hands are going numb, man. If I fall through this window, someone is going to call the police and I’m for sure gonna get arrested.”

Roll for Initiative | 5,081 | alchemystique / @alchemistc

Summary: He nearly gets away with it, is the thing. Three sessions in and the kids haven’t realized the BBEG isn’t the tarnished knight with the swooping hair and the stupid dad jokes they groan at every time. They still think the wizard leading them towards imminent destruction is on their side, and as his reluctant hero of an NPC warns them to be wary even Will the Wise rolls his eyes and misses the opportunity for a perception check that barring a Nat 1 would have, at the very least, told them that one of them wasn’t to be trusted. He’s not even trying that hard to hide the incredibly obvious parallels – the courtship the knight had once had with the sister of Wheeler’s paladin, the reluctant way he continuously steps in when the party gets themselves into a hairy situation, the incredibly obvious boner Eddie has for this stupid character he’s created solely for the purpose of a reveal he both does and does not want them to discover early on.

a cinematic vision ensued (like the holiest dream) | 5,226 | fivecenturiesverse

Summary: Eddie and Steve have been spending a lot of time together since Vecna. They're co-parenting kids, getting high every night, and sleeping in the same bed. They basically share a wardrobe too. He thinks this is dangerous, its like they’re married, the casual sharing of intimacy, this space between them which feels like something and nothing all at the same time. He thinks it’s dangerous for him to pretend Steve sees it the same way, that one day Steve’s droopy, kind eyes are going to see right through him and he’ll lose this. This being a side of Steve’s bed that is his, a nightstand where his rings always pile, a draw of shirts in Steve’s bedroom that only Steve uses. He can’t lose it, so he shuts his mouth, turns out the light, and watches the slow breathing of sleep fill Steve’s chest.

i saw you coming and i heard not a thing | 5,815 | ships_to_sail

Summary: For the first two-thirds of his life, Steve Harrington has perfect hearing, even if no one around him would believe it. And then Steve Harrington starts getting hit in the head. A lot.

Home Economics | 6,177 | peaktotheocean / @peaktotheocean

Summary: The girls of Hawkins High thought it was cute that Steve Harrington took Home Ec. All the guys thought he did it just to get the girls. Steve Harrington signed up for Home Ec because he hadn't seen his parents in a few weeks and he was getting pretty tired of Pop-Tarts.

Invitations | 6,902 | nbfutureboy / @futureboy-ao3

Summary: “Uh, Steve? How do you know my Dungeon Master?” “Uh, Dustin? How do you know my radio room janitor?” Eddie retorts, pointing at him with an accusatory fry.

the beginning of a bad joke | 7,083 | alligator_writes / @riality-check

Summary: At the beginning of his rant, lecture, whatever, Hottie stares right at him. He has a really intense stare. Pretty brown eyes set in a prettier face with even prettier hair on top of his head. Eddie gets distracted by all that pretty and by trying to make his point. And he doesn’t notice until halfway through that Hottie isn’t looking at him anymore. He’s looking at his friend. Eddie looks at her, too. Looks at her confused and focused expression. Looks at her hands moving rapidly. Oh. G-d. Hottie’s deaf, isn’t he?

You know you're just my type | 7,287 | liionne / @liionne

Summary: "It’s like he can’t help himself.” She says around a scoop of Double Bubblegum. Eddie always chooses the worst flavours, but that still isn’t going to stop Robin from nibbling away at his complementary banana split. “He’s a compulsive flirter. It’s weird. I’m worried for him.” “I’m not.” Eddie sighs softly, kind of dreamily, propping his elbow on table and resting his chin on top of his open palm. “It’s special when he flirts with me, though, right?” “Don’t flatter yourself.” Robin snorts.

everybody else (everybody else looks like they’ve figured it out) | 7,570 |stellarpoint (pettifogger) / @heybluechild

Summary: Eddie knows he’s rambling, but once it’s out there, he can’t take it back. He’s freaking out about Steve, but it’s about everyone who came before him, too—about Maggy McInnis and her friends laughing at him in the hallway, every teacher who wrote him off for not being able to sit still and turn in his homework, and every friend who got sick of him for not listening and showing up late. Steve hasn’t had a chance to get close to Eddie, and Eddie doesn’t want to run that risk. If Steve gets too close to him, he’ll see that Eddie’s brain is all scrambled up, and he won’t want him anymore. Eddie likes Steve right where he is, and he doesn’t want to lose that by being too much. And Eddie is always too much.

i'll kiss your mouth, and you'll be better for it | 8,520 | cpressmn / @shesapeachsconebob

Summary: “Why didn’t either of you tell us you were dating?” He looks so hurt and indignant in the way only Dustin can, and maybe it’s not too late to run out after Steve and make their case for the beers again if it means the kid’ll stop frowning and looking at Eddie like that. It takes a minute for his words to sink in. Eddie blinks. “What.” “What do you mean, what? You kissed!” “No, we didn’t,” Eddie scoffs. Except, yes, they did. Realization crashes over him, the force of it stunning him into silence. Steve kissed him. On the lips. Like it was nothing, like it was something they did every day. And Eddie hadn’t even blinked or shoved him away or registered it at all, just returned the kiss and went right back to bossing Steve around, as if the whole fucking thing was the most natural thing in the world. Fuck.

Bracing For Impact | 9,195 | writersagainstwritersblock

Summary: Wayne watches as Eddie falls hopelessly in love, with of all people, goddamn Steve Harrington.

if you like this you might also like: me | 9,247 | formosus_iniquis / @formosusiniquis

Summary: Book recommendations are Steve's least favorite part of the job, until he starts getting recommendations back from a mysterious guest. Their notes back and forth quickly become Steve's favorite part of the month, if only he could meet the guy he kept confiding in.

‘cause tramps like us, baby, we were born to run | 9,308 | stellarpoint (pettifogger) / @heybluechild

Summary: Realization #1: Steve is wearing a costume. He’s dressed as Springsteen on the cover of Born In The U.S.A. The album cover is staring at Eddie from the stack of records by the speakers, and he flicks his eyes between the cover and Steve, almost laughing at how obvious the resemblance is. Immediately after that, revelations two and three slam into him like an eighteen-wheeler. #2: Bruce Springsteen is kind of hot. #3: Steve Harrington is really hot. A fourth and much louder thought echoes through Eddie’s brain: oh, shit.

chat with you, baby (flirt a little, maybe) | 11,706 | desiccatedwithering (acornsofthemind) / @acornsofthemind

Summary: “Hey, shitheads!” Steve “the hair” Harrington barks, looming in the doorway like a monster from the Abyss. “What the fuck are you doing in here? Get your asses down to the gym right fucking now.” Eddie gapes. First of all, the audacity— Second, he’s never been much for physical fights, but if this douchebag thinks he can bully any of Eddie’s kids, he’ll have to go through Eddie first. “Let’s go! Move it!” Harrington snaps, making an impatient gesture down the hall.

Blooms of the Darkest Garden | 12,711 | tminuseternity

Summary: Steve is going to die. And because this is Hawkins, a town with an alternate dimension right up its asscrack, he isn't going to die in a normal way. No, instead he's going to die because he can't stop coughing up the most disgusting combination of Upside Down gunk and...flower petals? What the fuck is happening to him?

Operation: M.O.F.F.S | 16,843 | morna_mena

Summary: “Our friends are being mean.” Will jumps as El lets herself into his room and drops onto his bed. She doesn't look at him, arms crossed and frowning up at the ceiling. “Umm. Hello. I see you are upset so I won’t complain about the not knocking thing. Again.” She blinks and finally looks over at him with a small pout. “Sorry.” He shakes his head, smiling fondly, “It’s fine. Why are our friends being mean? What did they do?” El lets out a puff of air and returns to the staring contest she had been having with the ceiling. “They are being rude to Steve.”

The World's Most Metal Soulmate Tattoo | 17,272 | A_Pirates_Love_For_Me

Summary: After everything is over with Vecna, Eddie Munson notices the experience left him with an unexpected mark. A soulmate tattoo. Something about the experience had changed him enough that he now has a perfect match. And well, whoever the universe decided was best represented by a baseball bat filled with nails was probably a good guy to have around in a world where the things that go bump in the night turn out to be real.

In Your Peripheral | 17,788 | dynamitekid

Summary: Look, Eddie was a simple man. He wanted simple things. And if a simple man glances up while making his way back along a tabletop after he gave a —quite frankly, riveting— monologue against compulsory sports, and see's the sight that is Steve Harrington wide eyed, mouth parted, with a strong blush spread over his face… then the simple man is falling right back under the spell. Luckily, he doesn't actually fall. Mostly just stumbles a little while getting back to his chair.

it's his party (and i'll fall if i want to) | 25,411 | formosus_iniquis / @formosusiniquis

Summary: “Who invited us to this party anyway?” "Well I invited you," the ‘you should know this already dingus’ hangs in the air, not needing to even be said, "and Steve invited me." "Steve?" She nods, but even death couldn't stop him now, "Harrington? Steve Harrington? King Steve? Steve "the Hair" Harrington? Steve "Big House, No Parents" Harrington? Steve "Sex God" Harrington?" "I am certain you made at least those last two up. Yes, Steve "Lady Killer" Harrington invited me to his party." "Are we about to be Carrie'd?"

Down in a Dead Man's Town | 27,853 | holyfudgemonkeys (erraticallyinspired)

Summary: When Steve nearly runs over Will Byers on that fateful night in 1983, he doesn’t expect offering him a ride home would result in both of them being hunted into another dimension. Surviving there is hard. Adapting to normal life again is even harder. His old self settles like an ill-fitting suit, and there’s no room for nightmares and fear and his new bond with Will in it. As he struggles to find a new normal he can live with, Steve finds himself befriending a bunch of kids and maybe (definitely) falling in love with a local weed dealer.

I've been trying to figure you out, tell me then would you lend a hand? | 31,268 | eloquent_fairy

Summary: “So, tell me what’s so great about Harrington, then.” He doesn’t really know why he says it, it’s not like Eddie cares about the old King of Hawkins High; Steve Harrington is an asshole. That’s just a fact of life. The sky is blue, high school is pointless, Steve Harrington is a dickhead. But Eddie likes this kid, likes all of them actually. Dustin turns to look at him, a small smile on his lips, his eyes softening, and bingo.

Master Reclist · Personal Masterlist · Blog Nav.

#steddie #steve/eddie #steddie reclist #fanfic reclist #reclist #stranger things reclist

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greyias · 1 year

Note

I wish you would write a fic where... Theron somehow amasses a following of actual, physical porn bots droids and shenanigans ensue

I saw this prompt come in and devolved into a fit of heinous cackling. How, oh how could I resist trying to render our collective Tumblr nightmare into fictional text form?

Context: While not required reading, this is technically a sequel to this stunning crackfic, authored so long ago. If you need a refresher on the Medical Droid Love Triangle Saga, follow this link. Or this one, which is the real villain origin story of this fic. Or don't, you're already cursed if you click beyond the read more of this post.

With special thanks to @grumpyhedgehog, @sandwyrm, @storyknitter, @kitsonpaws, and @andveryginger for providing me with ideas, cursed pornbot summaries, and many cursed HoloNet websites that should never exist. You are not required to read any of this.

Technically rated T, but in reality rated N for Nobody, because no one should have to read this. I'm packing my bags, as my ride to superhell just came. Enjoy.

It had started as such a normal day -- if you could indeed have called any day on Odessen “normal”. What with the galaxy always being at the brink of some disaster or another, and their merry little band of misfits being led by the galaxy’s most notorious do-gooder, Theron’s schedule and to-do list had a tendency to get derailed on almost a daily basis.

This, however, was not how that usually happened.

He’d paused, mid-step, finger still hovering over his datapad, mid-entry as the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end, slowly dawning horror washing over him. His head turned slowly, like one of those doomed characters in a horror holofilm to look at the droid he’d just passed.

It was one of the new ones that had come in on a recent shipment. So new in fact, that there was still a fleet of them in the middle of being unpacked in the Logistics Wing. Shining, tall and blue, its highly polished quadranium head pivoted to look back at him.

“What,” Theron swallowed, willing his voice to sound even and not give in to the creeping dread, “what did you say?”

“Theron Shan,” the droid repeated helpfully, “is a master lover.”

“Oh no.” The words slipped out of their own accord.

“Just a moment, sir,” the droid continued, seemingly oblivious to the human’s distress, “I’m not quite done with your evaluation yet. Let’s see, where were we?”

“No no no no.”

The round flattened dome that served as its head tilted to one side, beady orange eyes sweeping over Theron from head to toe, before resuming its cheery, if horrifying report. “Subject is an exemplary specimen. In good cardiovascular health, above average muscle tone. Tall, well-built, and very clean...”

“Um,” Theron stammered. “I’m...” Flattered? Taken? Leaving? Wait--yes, that last one. “Going now!”

He didn’t give the cursed machine any more time to continue ogling him, instead taking off down the hall at a very brisk walk that nearly bordered on a jog. His mind raced at he beat a hasty retreat, trying to understand what was happening. It had been over a year since the The Incident, dubbed by some as the “Sexy Spy Virus”, and others by much more crude names, where a little harmless reprogramming had taken on a life of its own. Theron had been meticulous in his coding of the antivirus, wanting to ensure that the entire debacle would be forgotten. There was simply no way that it could crop back in on its own.

“Theron,” the brisk accented tone of one Lana Beniko burst in over his comm, “why did a droid just feel the need to inform me that they found rust on its insides during its last tune-up?”

“I don’t know,” Theron insisted, but his words were almost drowned out by a metallic clanking echoing down the corridor.

He threw a look over his shoulder, and to his horror, saw that his robotic admirer had decided to give chase.

“I’m going to have to call you back,” he quickly said into the comm as the droid picked up speed from a walk to an all out gallop.

“Theron,” she sounded both concerned and exasperated, which, considering Lana, was about par the course, “what’s going on?”

“Save me!” He shouted as he took off a dead sprint.

In his many years in the field, Theron had been threatened, sure. Shot at? Many times. He’d been drugged. Tortured. Stabbed through the gut with a lightsaber pike and lived to tell the tale. He’d run into Sith, Revanites, bounty hunters, thugs, fanatics and cultists alike. He’d been in more firefights than he could remember, and more covert ops than he cared to. He’d even been accused of being a traitor (although that was kind of the point at the time).

None of that compared right now to being chased down by a droid yelling at top volume claiming he was the best lover it had ever seen.

And this time, he was pretty sure it wasn’t actually his fault.

He rounded the corner from the corridor leading from the Logistics Wing, passing by the Commander’s (and at this point, his) Quarters. HK-55 and Z0-0M straightened to their full height at his arrival. Oh thank the Force, allies.

“Salutations: Agent Shan, you are looking quite spry today.”

“What?” he panted as he approached.

“Yes, Agent Shan, don’t believe what anyone else is saying!” Zeeyo exclaimed, throwing her arms into the air. “Your undercarriage doesn’t look rusty at all!”

Mind sharp as a tack, Theron realized the implications of this just in time, and dodged to the side, ducking and rolling as the assassin-turned-bodyguard droid lunged forward to trap him in a bear hug. Not pausing to even catch his breath, as soon as his feet hit the ground he propelled himself forward and further down the hall.

“Frustration: I only wish to profess my admiration for you, Agent Shan!”

“Nope nope nope nope!” Desperation was starting to tinge the edges of his words now.

The metallic clanking intensified as more droids behind him joined in the chase, all of their vocabulators joining in unison to tell him in one way, or another, that he was in fact, the pinnacle of sexual prowess.

Theron couldn’t run forever, despite whatever their programming was forcing them to say, his stamina would give out before the lustftul droids’ power supplies. As the corridor zigged and twisted, he saw an opening in the form of a door sliding open. Without hesitation he dove in, shoving the individual there, thankfully made of flesh and bone, aside as he slammed the door controls.

The door slid securely shut just as the thunderous clanking filled the corridor beyond, their lustful words of appreciation and encouragement nearly drowned out by the racket. Theron hadn’t bothered to look or count, but he was pretty sure that the number had risen from three in the scant moments it had taken Theron to dart from one corridor to the next.

He held up a hand to his lips as he turned to thank the person who had unwittingly provided his temporary salvation. The words of gratitude died on his lips, as he realized exactly who’s room he had sought refuge in.

For a moment, Theron truly considered surrendering himself to the lusty droid mob.

Draike Highwind’s face was caught somewhere between confusion and amusement, but the latter was winning out as he started to decipher individual phrases drifting in from the corridor. A dark brow arched higher, lips twitching with undisguised mirth as the stupid blue droid that had started this whole mess yelled once again about Theron being a master lover.

More seconds passed, the ruckus quieting down, before silence descended once more, and it was finally safe to speak.

“So,” Draike drew out the word, somehow lacing it with more innuendo than all of the malfunctioning droids combined, “what ya been doing, Shan?”

“Nothing!” he insisted, voice still hushed just in case one of the droids could somehow hear.

“Doesn’t sound like nothing.” His brother-in-law’s smirk widened into an almost feral grin, eyebrows waggling. “Sounds like you’ve been getting... busy.”

One of the greatest mysteries in the galaxy was how one man could make anything sound that dirty. “I was minding my own business!”

“Oh, I bet you were.”

“You’re having way too much fun with this.”

“I mean...” If looks could kill, the pilot would have melted on the spot. Unfortunately for Theron, Draike was apparently immune to that sort of thing. “How often do I get the chance?”

“Did you do this?”

“Me?” Draike let out a sharp bark of laughter. “Stars, I wish I could have thought of something this good! These are memories I will cherish forever.”

Theron massaged the bridge of his nose. “I hate my life.”

“I mean, I’m not really into droids,” Draike went on, either not knowing (or more likely caring) about his brother-in-law’s predicament, “flesh is more my kind of thing. But you know, if you and the little lady need to spice things up by bringing in a little metal--”

“Please stop. I’m begging you!”

“Begging, eh? So you’re saying you’re more into--“

“Forget it, I’m taking my chances with the sex-crazed machines roaming the halls.” His palm hovered over the door sensors.

“Theron, wait!” There was enough urgency in Draike’s voice to give him pause. “It’s dangerous out there, take this.”

At first, he was honestly afraid to look, expecting to be offered something like a condom or some other bad joke, but was surprised to see the other man holding out a stealth generator.

“To escape your fans.”

“That’s actually not a bad idea.”

“I know. I’m a genius.”

“I didn’t say that.” He quickly nabbed the stealth generator before Draike could change his mind and frowned at the initials carved in the side in Aurabesh. “Is this even yours?”

“Eh, close enough.”

Whatever, beggars couldn’t be choosers. Theron would deal with those potential repercussions later. He flicked on the power to the stealth generator which let out a low, almost inaudible hum as a burst of life engulfed his form. He closed his eyes against the sudden burst of brightness, and when he opened them again, dark spots of the light pattern danced in his vision for a few seconds. He blinked a few more times before they faded away.

He waved an arm experimentally in front of his face, and only felt the slight movement of air. Draike didn’t seem to react at all, and that was probably good enough.

“Thanks,” he said, palming the sensor to the door.

Draike rolled his eyes and ambled out into the corridor, looking around with the air of a man all too used to hiding from those looking for him. Theron watched as he raised a hand to a very slowly moving GNK power droid.

“How’s it hanging?”

“GONK!”

“Oh yeah? You don’t say! I think I saw him head that way.” Draike pointed in the direction leading to cantina. “Just between you and me, I heard he’s sweet on that droid who’s a comfort enthusiast.”

“GONK! GONK! GONK!”

Still hidden underneath the stealth field, Theron had to bite down the urge to make any noise of frustration and just turned an invisible, irritated gaze at the other man’s back. As if sensing Theron’s irritation, Draike just grinned wider.

“Yeah, you know how those spy types are. Always toying with droids’ hearts. You could do better than him.”

“GONK!”

“Oh, you spicy droid! Yeah, trundle off that way, big guy. I’m sure you’ll catch him!”

With a loud clanking, the GNK droid began his slow and steady journey towards the cantina. As the echoes finally faded, Draike casually stretched, pointing towards the direction of the War Room.

Theron skulked on by, but not before giving his brother-in-law a well deserved whop upside the head. The stealth field flickered momentarily on the physical contact before shimmering back into place.

“It’d serve you right to get caught by doing that,” Draike sniffed indignantly, “after all I’ve done to help you.”

“When all of this is over--”

“Hush now,” Draike waved at the air in front of him. “You have bigger problems to deal with. Meanwhile, I will be heading to the cantina. And definitely won’t be live-streaming any brawls breaking out over the Master Lover breaking droid hearts everywhere.”

Theron snorted out an annoyed breath, and checked his urge to trip Draike as he sauntered off, hands jammed into his pockets as he whistled a jaunty tune. Like the purloined stealth generator, he’d have to worry about slicing and corrupting any servers containing evidence of this mess after he figured out how to stop whatever this was from spreading any further.

The upside to this whole unfortunate side encounter, was that the stealth generator made it possible for him to quietly creep around any droids he passed in the corridor. Most seemed to be making a hasty exit for the cantina, almost as if word had spread of Drake’s false rumor about his and C2-N2’s torrid love affair and every heartbroken circuit was flocking in that direction now.

And when he thought about it like that, when exactly had this become his life? Oh, right. Like fifteen minutes ago. Or however long this nightmare had started. Time had sort of lost meaning, if he were being honest.

He managed to make it to the war room, undetected and unmolested, and quietly snuck his way towards the irritable blonde Sith, holding her head in her hands as if she were battling the world’s strongest migraine. As Theron approached the Sith, he could hear her muttering under her breath in frustration. He hesitated for a moment before clearing his throat, causing her to jerk her head up in surprise.

“Who’s there?”

“Quiet,” Theron hissed. “They might hear you.”

“Oh, for Sith’s sake,” she exhaled, “where in the blazes have you been?”

“Hiding,” he whispered urgently. “These droids have all gone haywire!”

“And who’s fault is that, I wonder.”

“Not me,” he insisted, “not this time!”

“Right,” she said sardonically, “and I suppose that’s why there isn’t a reality holoseries entitled ‘Programmed for Love’ currently being live-streamed in the cantina for the entire HoloNet to see.”

“Damn it, Draike!” Theron cursed. “I thought he was joking about that.”

“Of course. How did I not see that coming?” she muttered.

“I’ll slice in and scrub all of the servers after we figure out this... this... whatever this is?”

“Your insecurities laid bare in binary?” she suggested, oh so helpfully.

“Why did I come to you for help again?”

“Because--”

It was at that point, that a probe droid, currently speeding its way towards the cantina, happened to take notice of Lana talking to thin air, and veered off its intended trajectory, heading straight for Theron’s position near the back of the war room. If the loud alarms and flashing lights were any indication, it had been able to see through his stealth generator.

Wait... those weren’t alarm proximities it was flashing. As Theron watched its rapid approach, he couldn’t help but stare at it in dumb fascination, brow furrowing as he tried to make out the images it was projecting. If he didn’t know better, he’d almost say it was a bizarre mixture of Aurabesh and hologlyphs.

He squinted, just able to make out: “DX-98 🤖🔥 Analytical Scanner 💋🙏 Okara Droid Factory 🔍🌌💕 Exobiology Research 🥵🍑 Top HoloFans 0.7%!”

Before he had a chance to process any of that, the droid was already upon him, pincher arms spreading wide to snap him up for some purpose far beyond its original programming. He only had milliseconds to react before the droid reached him, when an explosive force sent the droid flying backwards harmlessly, and had Theron landing ungracefully on his tailbone. The stealth field fizzled out with a pop on his impact with the ground.

A familiar figure landed between him and the droid, twin blue scarves billowing behind her dramatically, blonde ponytail swaying with the motion of her movement. A small frown of concentration bunched her forehead as his wife threw a concerned look in his direction.

“You requested rescue?” Grey asked.

“Ah, my knight in shining armor has arrived,” he quipped back.

“I am not wearing my armor.” The frown of concentration morphed into one of confusion.

“I--never mind.” He pushed himself to his feet, dusting off his hands. “Thank you for the timely intervention.”

She graced him with a hint of a smile and a bob of her head in acknowledgment. “Any time.”

“As touching as all of this is,” Lana broke in sourly, “it still doesn’t solve our larger problem.”

“Yeah,” Theron rubbed the back of his neck, “you’re not wrong. It sounds like this has spread across the entire base?”

“It appears that way,” Lana said tightly. “You know, you assured me that all of this had been taken care of the last time we dealt with this issue.”

“Hey now,” he bit back, “I’m a man of my word!”

She snorted at that. “Tell that to the Umbaran Transit Authority.”

“How are you still mad about that?”

“You tazed me!”

“Focus,” Grey said, eyeing the stunned probe droid warily. “If memory serves me correct, you had a program you deployed to revert the programming of the droids the last time this happened.”

“Yes, that’s what doesn’t make sense.” He watched as the holoprojectors on the downed probe droid flickered, hologlyphs flashing rapidly in the War Room’s dim light. “I programmed it to eliminate all trace of the offending code. The only way it could be reappearing now is if someone took one of the infected droids offline before I deployed...”

Lana arrived at the same conclusion right about the time that Theron did, picking up the thought. “I seem to recall a certain someone requesting you replicate your work for less-than-legal purposes.”

Theron angrily punched the button on his comm as he growled, “Gault!”

The Devaronian’s voice came back immediately, almost a little too suave. “Theron! What a surprise to hear your dulcet tones requesting my presence.”

“Gault,” Lana managed to keep some measure of calm, “are you responsible for this current situation?”

“What situation is that?” he asked far too innocently, even as a distant call of a droid’s clanking nearly drowned out it’s loud declaration of the presence of rust on one Theron Shan’s “bolt”. There was a moment of silence before he continued. “Oh! You mean the lustful droids currently running amok on the base?”

“I’m glad we’re on the same page,” Lana said dryly. “My original question stands.”

“I am shocked, shocked and scandalized that my name would be the first to come to mind! Might I remind you, it was one Miss Djannis who requested you create her a Shan Sexbot.”

“Yeah,” Kaliyo jumped in on the comms, clearly annoyed, the sound of metallic brawling nearly drowning out her voice, “I wanted it for hilarious crimes! Not whatever the fuck this is!”

“Gault,” a third voice, Hylo Visz, cut in. From the background noise, it seemed she was in the same location as Kaliyo. “I swear, if you don’t help us figure out how to stop this, when you’re not looking I’ll cut off your--”

“Okay, okay, geez!” He interrupted before his significant other could finish whatever that threat was. “Fine, it was me! I deactivated a droid before Theron uploaded his program.”

“Of course.” Lana rolled her eyes upwards, as if asking the Force for patience.

“In my defense,” Gault continued, “originally it was just to shut the stupid thing up! But then Kaliyo came up with that brilliant idea for the Shan Sexbot Distraction, and I thought, why not hold on to this beauty in case it came in handy for a con?”

The sound of Theron smacking his forehead in frustration echoed throughout the War Room.

“So you know, just had a fun idea come to me the other day, so I extracted the original programming and altered a few things, and tried to put it into a new droid for my plan.”

“Did that droid happen to be a blue medical monstrosity?” Theron was actively massaging his temples at this point.

“I will have you know,” Gault said, “that BL-U3 is a consummate professional. You would be lucky to have him perform a medical exam on you!”

“Yeah, that was definitely his intent,” Theron shot back. “Purely professional and not lecherous at all! Which was not in any of my code.”

“Hey, I never claimed to be very talented when it came to software programming. I may have made a mistake or two when altering your code.”

“May have?!”

“How was I supposed to know that the remnants of the Gemini Frequency code in our systems was going to work after the entire Eternal Fleet had gone offline and deploy your software STD to the entire network? Sue me!”

“I’m considering it!”

Before the mostly pointless argument could escalate any further, the sounds of metallic clanking from above, roughly from the location of the cantina, began to grow closer, the cacophony increasing in volume, until it sounded like it was coming in all directions.

“That is not a good sign,” Grey’s mutter was nearly lost to the noise.

“Hey,” Drake’s annoyed voice cut in over the comm, “my livestream is now officially ruined! I hope you’re all happy!”

“I’m afraid to even ask why,” Theron said.

“Oh, it seems all of my extremely eligible and single contestants heard your voice over the comms and abandoned challenging Seetoo Enntoo to unarmed droid combat for the right to court you, and are now all headed in your direction.”

“Oops.”

“Worry not Agent Shan,” the unusually warbly vocabulator of C2-N2 came over the comms, “I will not rest until I alone can provide you with the ultimate in comfort!”

“We should probably get a different housekeeping droid after this is all over,” he told his wife.

That seemed a lesser concern to Grey, as she had shifted into Alliance Commander mode, and was currently on the comms, shouting for every available member of the Force Enclave to get to the War Room as fast as possible to help hold off the incoming army of lustful droids.

Yeah, come to think of it, that was probably more important.

“We must use nonlethal force,” she stressed, giving a particularly severe look to Lana when she said that, getting a simple nonplussed shrug in return, “as we only need to hold the droids at bay until we can come up with a solution. They are not to blame for what’s happening.”

Theron begged to differ, but she was probably right in this case. The cost of repairing or replacing an entire base full of droids would be astronomical.

As Force users began to stream in and take up position around the room, the sound of wheels racing along the metal plating caught Theron's attention, and he looked over to see a familiar silver T7-series astromech racing into the room. He tensed up instinctively at the sight of a droid, as anyone would have in his situation.

“Teeseven!” Grey called out with a smile, clearly not as wary or droidshy.

The little astromech let out a friendly whistle and series of chirps in binary, that roughly translated to: “T7-01 = Safe! // Been off network entire morning!”

“Oh, what a relief,” she breathed, “I would have hated for you to be infected with this too!”

He let out another series of beeps: “T7-01 = still in possession of original antivirus code. // Can tweak it and upload to servers = Save the day?”

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea,” Theron muttered.

“T7 = not scared!”

Grey’s expression melted into one of admiration and pride. “Teeseven, that’s incredibly brave -- but are you sure? Theron’s right, it could be very dangerous.”

“T7 = Jedi + Theron’s friend. // Helping > Risk!”

She looked at him and he returned the gaze with a small nod, realizing there wasn’t much in the way of choice. It was either that or let the droids overrun them. And then whatever happened when one of them actually got their hands on on Theron -- a prospect he wasn’t really that thrilled to explore right now.

“Fine,” he said tersely, “let’s do this!”

The two of them rushed over to the center console in the room, Theron pulling out his slicer spike as Teeseven plugged his scomplink arm into the main network terminal. The rest of their reinforcements from the Force Enclave arrived just in time and formed a ring around the two slicers. They managed to erect a large Force barrier just as the metallic clanging and clatter grew to a roar, announcing the arrival of the lecherous horde.

Near the front of the mob, Z0-0M threw up her arms in glee and excitement as she jumped to try and catch sight of her beloved. “There you are Agent Shan! You left before we could finish our conversation -- you were saying something about oxidation?”

“Interjection: Do not listen to this hussy, Theron! You and I will make sweet explosions together!”

Theron valiantly tuned them out as he took in a feed of the original antivirus code that Teeseven shared with him. Yes, this all looked correct. Unfortunately, he was going to need get a look to see how Gault had mutilated his beautiful original coding to know how to alter it.

Teeseven was two steps ahead of him, and a stream of code flashed across the HUD in his ocular implants. He watched in horror as he saw the butchery with his own two eyes.

“Gault, where the hell did you get this code?” he asked over the comms incredulously. “HornHub?”

“Excuse you, I only frequent the classiest places on the galactic communications grid, like HoloHump!” The growl of Gault’s name from a very angry Mirialan smuggler had him quickly adding. “You know, I’m just going to shut up and let you concentrate on what you’re doing.”

Teeseven, ever the valiant worker, ignored the conversation completely, and was hard at work running diagnostics on the altered code and the best way to modify the antivirus to address it. Theron watched the stream of letters and numbers fly across the HUD at lightning speed.

The little guy was good at what he did. He let out a flurry of beeps and whistles as almost the last piece of this very lurid puzzle started to fall into place. The little droid seemed to almost be singing along with the code as he wrote it, like a mechanical maestro conducting an orchestra. They were close, so close and--

The next whistle Teeseven let out was not his normal, cheerful way of communication, much lower in timbre and more seductive.

No.

Teeseven whirled his flat head around until his visual sensor faced Theron, and let out another wolf whistle, his holoprojector lighting up to proudly display: T7-01 🤖👀🔍 Observant 👁️🔭 Scanner 🔍🏞️ Tython 🌄👏 215 🍒♎ Repairing 👅🙈 Top HoloFans 3.6%

“What was that?” Grey shouted to be heard over the droids catcalling.

“No no no no,” Theron muttered, “we’re so close! Don’t do this to me, little buddy!”

“What happened to my precious baby boy?” Grey demanded, sweat trickling down the side of her face as she struggled to maintain the Force barrier.

Beyond the barrier, the rest of the porndroid army followed suit with Teeseven, all either wildly projecting their own series of hologlyphs and random facts about themselves and their planets of origins, while others struck disturbingly seductive poses, and a scant few demanded that “ShanDaddy” start a holocall with them in private.

With no time and no recourse left, Theron dove back into the system, yanking Teeseven’s unfinished code as he was nearly overwhelmed with lewd images and thirsty hologlyphs, struggling to finish and upload the code as the volume in the War Room rose to a crescendo just as the Force users’ began to fall, one after the other, their barrier weakening by the moment.

The overwhelming cacophony of hologlyphs, lewd poses, and robotic come-ons that had filled the War Room suddenly disappeared. All eyes turned to the droids as almost in unison, as they all powered down—a sign that their malware had been neutralized. Theron slumped back in relief, his work finally done.

Grey, Lana, and the others let out a long sigh of relief, the tension leaving their bodies in a rush.

“Thank the Force,” Grey murmured, sinking down to the ground. “I do not think I could have held that barrier much longer.”

Theron nodded, feeling a similar sense of exhaustion. He leaned back against the console, closing his eyes but was unable to banish the mentally scarring series of images that were probably permanently burned into his retinas.

“Remind me,” he said faintly, “to obliterate HoloHump’s servers. Once I’m done murdering Gault.”

“You act as if there will be anything left after I find him,” Lana said darkly.

“Remember everyone,” Grey spoke in her best and most official Alliance Commander voice, “murder is bad and frowned upon in the Official Alliance Employee Handbook.”

“Query: Why are we all in the War Room?” HK-55 asked as he came back online. “And more importantly, why is that blue meddroid manipulating its medical instruments into a heart shape, as if expressing affection towards the Commander?”

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