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butterflydm · 8 months

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wot rewatch (book spoilers edition): 2x2

Additional thoughts that had too many spoilers to go into my earlier post will be found here. Spoilers for all the teasers and trailers, plus through book 13: A Memory of Light.

So one of the big questions that I have is: how much is Lanfear acting with Ishamael's knowledge and how much is she going her own way? Ishamael said in the Darkfriend social scene that he is still looking for Rand. If he's being truthful there (and he's talking to his minions, so there's really no point in lying), then Lanfear has not told him that she located Lews Therin.

2. I hadn't thought about this on my first watch, but @ladyofpembroke noted that Lanfear is probably in Rand's final dream in the next episode, so it seems possible that she actually has a hand in all his dreams. Constantly reminding him that he could kill his friends if he sees them again is a good way to make him want to stay where he is (with her) and not try to reconnect with his past life. Like any effective manipulator, she's keeping him isolated from his friends and family as much as she can.

3. otoh, we know from the books that being able to locate someone's dreams doesn't mean that you know where they are in the physical world, so this might be an Ishamael-influenced dream (I note that while Rand's visions of his friends has them wearing their S1 outfits, Ishamael is wearing his s2 outfit, which Rand hasn't seen), so this might be an Ishamael-influenced dream since he figures he might as well torment Rand in the dream if he can't find him irl.

4. Given that Rand is already hearing whispers, I wonder when the show plans to re-introduce Lews Therin to us in his own form. It might even be this season, if they wanted to make sure to keep a lock on the actor (or we might get another Age of Legends cold open -- though I note that we only had one cold open in this set of three episodes, though that might be because Rafe & co were aware that they would likely all air the same night so that might have affected their choices there - I'd love an AoL cold open where we get to see Lanfear and Lews Therin together).

5. So, did Rand find his way to Cairhien first and then Lanfear set up an inn in the Foregate to entice him to her, or did she set up her inn before he arrived and she figured out a way to lure him in? Either way, she's doing a much better job than the Lanfear in the books. She's much less suspicious than "random noblewoman who managed to appear in an unpopulated parallel world so that Rand could save her" and she's more subtle too. While the cringefail Forsaken in the books can be amusing, the threat level of the villains also helps tell you how seriously to take your protagonists, so I'm glad that they beefed up her threat level by actually making her effective. Right now, Lanfear is #winning on every possible level.

6. I love Errol because he serves several story purposes -- he's reminding us that Rand looks "like an Aiel"; he's serving Hurin's purpose in the story of giving Rand someone to look after and be protective of; he's teaching Rand sword forms because he was a blademaster; and he's giving us a bit of history about "the Aiel war". And the actor is quite charming. Plus he's used to show us both Rand's compassion and his need/desire to find mentors to help teach him the skills he needs. At this point in time, Rand does believe that he's defeated the Dark One and his nightmares are just nightmares but he does still want to learn how to protect himself and how to control himself.

7. We mostly hear indistinct whispers until Rand is walking down the hallway (it's the shot from the trailer) and it resolves into "Do you hear me? You are mine, Rand al'Thor." Which is very interesting. Our first inkling of Lews Therin? If so, it shows a greater awareness of Rand as a person than LTT's voice showed in the earlier books when it appeared in his head. I've speculated that this might happen, so I wonder if we're going to get more genuine back-and-forth between Rand and LTT than we really got in the books as a way of letting us into Rand's internal narration without him needing to pour out his heart to any of the characters around him.

8. I am actually loving Perrin getting Rand's plotline here -- it's working really well for him, being used to show us how Perrin can smell what happened in places so vividly that he's re-experiencing the past. I feel like if I didn't know this was Rand's original plotline, I wouldn't have guessed. It suits how they're exploring Perrin's character so well. I do wonder... Elyas speaks of Perrin experiencing a 'vision' -- I wonder if they're going to make the mystical side of being a Wolfbrother more distinct from what Dreamers do in this show version. Because it really was kinda... weird in the books how Perrin and Egwene are doing all this training in the same dreamworld but Perrin never runs across her or any of the Aiel Dreamwalkers, even once they're spending more time in the wetlands side of things.

9. The nailed-up Fade is used in the books to mark when Fain 'takes control' of the Darkfriends & Trollocs. I wonder here if it's meant to mark the moment when the dagger owns him more strongly than the Dark One does. Because the people of Shadar Logoth were not darkfriends -- and they focused on this in s1, too, because dagger!Mat is not a fan of the Fade that he meets in the farmhouse.

10. Love foreshadowing of Errol talking about "Aielman among us and no one bats an eyelash in the entire place" -- Rand is going to be bringing a lot of Aiel to the wetlands. I bet we're going to get to see some of these sword forms in the finale!

11. Liandrin does seem like she's becoming genuinely invested in Nynaeve. I like that (almost) everyone gets their own personal Darkfriend -- Nynaeve has Liandrin, Mat also has Liandrin (she's a hard worker!), Rand has Lanfear, Perrin has (remorseful) Ingtar, Moiraine has (double agent) Verin, Lan has (repentant) Tomas, and even Egwene gets a scene with Sheriam (who will get to be Her Darkfriend Among Us later on, if we're able to follow the books that closely when we get there), though she's not really the focus of Sheriam's attention. Everyone gets a little personal attention from the Shadow!

I like that Nynaeve gets rushed forward to the test for Accepted due to Liandrin wanting to teach her so badly. It seems more realistic reasoning than we get in the books.

12. Another big lie from Liandrin here about how Mat is here because they are "only observing" that the effects of the dagger are out of his system, which Mat immediately calls bullshit on. He's locked in a cell and only Liandrin is around -- that is not an official observation by any means. That's a prison. It's been six months. So I would put Liandrin's official lie count at two. Notably, she's only lying to Mat so far, who is both kept well away from other people and also doesn't really know as much about Aes Sedai (we know from Egwene and Moiraine's conversation in the woods in s1 that the people of the Two Rivers do not have the Aes Sedai oaths memorized).

13. My dearest, my darling, my deepest love is finally here! At the end of my reread, when I was ranking my favorite characters, Elayne was my number one favorite. Ceara is doing such a good job with her and the writing is also excellent. I love how many different sides of her we get to see in just these two episodes -- sheltered noble, awkward girl who grew up with no friends, someone familiar with the Tower but not familiar being a novice in the Tower, but a tinkerer (!!! so excited that they put this in so early) at heart and incredibly loyal and compassionate. I just adored her so much in these two episodes and I am looking forward to seeing more of her. I do really hope that, in the midst of all the chaos, that the show does manage to give her something of a meet-cute with Rand, even if it's less obviously romantic than the one in the books. But I'm really looking forward to more of her interacting with Egwene and Nynaeve, and hopefully meeting Aviendha and/or Min and/or Mat in the finale or before it.

14. I have zero issue with Sheriam not being a redhead. I think it's a good idea for the show to cut down on the number of redheads, given that Jordan says it's rare but then keeps giving us random redheads. Limiting the on-screen ones to the Aiel and the royal house of Andor seems like a good idea to me.

15. So first we got Perrin's letters last episode. Now, in this episode, Elyas tells Perrin that the soldiers he's with right now "are not your pack". While he could be talking about the wolves, of course, I feel like, as a viewer, that makes me think of the EF5 and how that's who Perrin belongs with right now. Especially after Perrin's letter talking about how he feels 'exposed' without the others around. Again, it gives me the hope that we'll get more moments of reconnection between the EF5 over the course of the show.

16. This moment with Verin is such a great one to look at knowing the truth of her situation. "Even oaths have loopholes one can exploit". She's the expert at it. Oaths are a bit of a minor theme in this episode and the next -- the loopholes and also, next episode, we're introduced to the Seanchan oaths where Perrin is, I assume, going to take the very reasonable position that a forced oath is not binding (which is the same position that Mat had in Winter's Heart but inexplicably abandoned in Crossroads of Twilight when he decided his accidental wedding vows were binding).

Oh! I knew I remembered hearing the words "Toman Head" in these three episodes but hadn't remembered it was Verin mentioning it! I thought it was noted as part of the Dark Prophecies but it's mentioned here as mainline prophecy. But the name is out there now. And this conversation also confirms "sword of flame" and "battle in the sky" for the finale, most likely, and a mention of a "branded hand" which feels like it confirms the herons. I wonder if Rand is going to use the same weave on his dad's sword that we saw Verin using at the end of the last episode for Tomas's sword. This may also mean that it's using that weave that burns the herons into Rand's palms?

17. The Rand and Lanfear scenes. Wow! But, yeah, I wonder how much her non-reaction to his bloody knuckles struck show-onlys. She doesn't ask him what happened, who he beat up. She just kisses his bloody knuckles and sweet-talks him into bed.

18. So far, we've heard/seen three separate form of violent teaching in the White Tower -- the unnamed woman who beat Moiraine to make her channel (likely Elaida); Liandrin's behavior with Nynaeve; and Sheriam telling Elayne that she'll be switched. Both Liandrin and Sheriam, of course, are Black Ajah. But from Egwene's reaction here, it doesn't seem like being ordered to be switched is anything close to the common punishment that it seemed to be in the books. But we'll see!

19. It does occur to me that Gawyn (maybe Galad too) might already have been in training with the Warders even if Elayne wasn't a novice yet -- Elayne has been spending her summers in the Tower and it's entirely possible that Gawyn's training to protect her meant he was sent off early to start learning from the best. We don't get any hints in this episode or the next about her brothers, but we're pretty focused on her developing friendship with Egwene.

20. "Min is in Tar Valon" and "Min and Mat share a plotline" were my two most hoped-for options for Min's storyline for this season, so I'm happy about that. I do wish that Min had been given a chance to bond with Elayne or Egwene but, hopefully, there will be time for that later. But I really love the set-up we've been given where we are going to explore Elayne with Egwene and Nynaeve; Min being more fully-explored with Mat; and then Aviendha when she enters Perrin's storyline. All of them are getting fleshed out as individual characters before any of them get romantically involved with Rand. I am feeling pretty hopeful that we're going to get our polycule (and a genuine polycule, not a harem) in the upcoming seasons. They've been putting in a lot of "poly relationships are valid and complex" groundwork in and it looks like they are going to be making sure that all of the characters involved get to be full characters who have their own agendas and their own arcs.

Some people on reddit are still pretty disappointed that Min isn't the male-gaze fantasy that she is in the later books but I have been thrilled with the changes that the show has done so far with her. We also maybe get a hint here that Min is going to be canonically bisexual by the way she jokes about Liandrin, so I will cross my fingers on that.

20. Min's viewing! I do love that they're massively cutting down on the number of Min's viewings to focus on ones that are interesting and relevant. This one is particularly interesting because there's nothing like it in the books. Mat stabbing Rand, then cradling him as he falls.

Theory #1: this is a flicker-flicker world (maybe we only get one big one?) and it's not Our Mat stabbing Our Rand but an alternate one.

Theory #2: Rand asks Mat to fulfill his promise to keep Rand from going mad and that's why Mat stabs him.

Theory #3: Rand loses control of himself (like Lady Amalisa in 1x8) and Mat stabs him to try to get him to lose his hold on the One Power.

Theory #4: Mat gets placed under compulsion (which would be another reason for him to want protection from Aes Sedai and channeling).

Theory #5: Mat gets The Dagger again and he's the one who gives Rand the wound in his side, while under its influence.

Theory #6: It's metaphorical and Mat takes the place of Alivia and helps Rand 'die' at the end of the series (seems unlikely but I'll throw it out there).

And probably lots of other things I haven't thought of. But it definitely shakes Min to see it.

I wonder if she only agreed to help Liandrin after this moment or if she'd already agreed and this is just additional incentive. I don't think she's told Liandrin anything about Rand. She was able to keep that secret from Moiraine even under blackmail so I think she kept it from Liandrin too.

But I do love that we get a viewing that connects Mat and Rand together, even if it's through a traumatic encounter. I am a simple soul who finds messiness intriguing.

21. Lanfear! Talking about her broken heart to the man who broke it and who she is, even now, doing her best to groom back into the man that she wants. The layers in this conversation are exquisite. When she tells him that he can't hurt her, she also can say that because she has a strong grasp of what she can do with the Power while he's still stumbling in the dark. Ooof, but Rand was (unknowingly) on risky ground when he confirmed that he does sometimes think of his past when he's with her.

Also, talking about how "no one else" could ever have power over her heart now that her previous lover is gone... when she's literally talking to his reincarnation. The conversation is just so rich and so sharp and there's so much of it that is going over Rand's head because he doesn't have the necessary information to even begin to put the pieces together. "What's left to hurt if he still has my whole heart?" she says, to the guy in question. "When I'm with you, I can pretend you're him." YEAH. I BET YOU CAN.

22. So I wonder if Moiraine's threat here to Lan, that she would let Alanna take his bond if he didn't let her leave on her own, is going to be the extent of the "Myrelle" plot point that Alanna absorbs and it won't actually happen in fact. But now it's out there as an idea that Warders can be forcibly bonded so that when Alanna forcibly bonds someone else down the road, the idea isn't coming out of nowhere.

23. I was so shocked when the Seanchan attacked in episode two. I was thinking this would happen in episode five. But once I sat down and thought about it, I realizes that Perrin has already hit all the main points of the Hunt for the Horn storyline on his side of things (and even partly on what Rand would have been doing). We've found the traitor and had Ingtar reveal his sympathy towards said traitor; we've found the Fade and the moment when Fain started playing by his own rules; and we've even been exploring Perrin and his senses. This does mean that we're going to have a lot of potential time to explore the Seanchan invasion and culture.

24. I don't have any issues with Ishamael openly being Suroth's advisor vs someone covertly giving Suroth her marching orders. High Lady Suroth is a Darkfriend and always was. We're just taking it out of the shadows and showing it openly to the viewers (and Perrin).

I do wonder if Perrin specifically seeing the Shadow and the Seanchan so entwined will have an impact on his later storylines. That I wonder about. But the later books were, tbh, really weird about how low-impact the Falme encounter ended up being in the long run for pretty much everyone except Egwene. Min basically forgets she knows anything about the Seanchan even when that information could help Rand, everyone forgets about the environment of paranoia and fear that the Seanchan created in Falme, etc. There's a lot of weird forgetfulness going around, especially in CoT & KoD, when Jordan wanted to sell us on his slaver romance.

(the way that the show has been improving characters like Min and relationships like Rand/Lanfear does give me a lot of hope in how they will handle Tuon and the Mat & Tuon 'romance' and that they'll make it better than the poorly-written dumpster fire that it is in CoT & KoD)

#butterfly watches wot #wot #wheel of time #wot on prime #wot show spoilers #wot prime spoilers #wot s2 spoilers #wheel of time s2 spoilers #wot book spoilers #wot 2x2 spoilers #a memory of light

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riverhag2 · 6 months

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my favorite characters die in my favorite media all the damn time

my current hyper focus is a tragic opera that ends with my blorbo having his life flash before his eyes in a horrid fever dream where he's confronted for perhaps the first time with how horribly he's failed everyone he's ever loved and then he dies

death isn't the problem

pointless and hurried stuff-her-in-a-fridge death that doesn't actually even serve the narrative purpose cobbled together as an after-the-fact explanation is the problem

the idea that Izzy's arc was "over" is frankly ludicrous

he'd only just begun to rediscover the parts of himself he'd buried away or lost to piracy, to Blackbeard, to Ed

he'd only just found love with the crew

he'd only just started the arc that Stede and Ed set off on in the beginning of s1

his death does nothing for his character

it also does nothing for anyone else's

smarter people than me have spoken extensively on why the "mentor/father figure" thing is just outright non-existent in the text

even without that, the show is obviously trying to use Izzy's death to free Ed from the mantle of blackbeard and that would be a valid and interesting narrative choice if you'd set that up at any point before the last five minutes of the last episode but um

Ed had already begun the work of releasing himself from blackbeard, and even when he dons the leathers once again, it's not even the tiniest bit for Izzy's sake nor in any way at Izzy's insistence or encouragement (and in fact, Izzy had already encouraged him to step away from it)

whatever is still tying Ed to blackbeard, it is textually very much not Izzy

Izzy's dying sentiment of "they love you" holds no water because out of Ed, Stede, and Izzy, only one of them has actually connected with the crew this season and it sure as fuck isn't Ed

Izzy's dying admonition of "you're surrounded by family" is immediately followed by Ed and Stede fucking off and leaving the ship

there's nothing in Izzy's death that serves Ed narratively

there's apparently then the argument that Izzy is representative of old piracy, a dying world, and therefore he must die (which, ok, fine, but to what end?) but that's *actually insane* in the context of a show entirely about starting over in middle age

killing a character is often a good narrative choice, but if you're gonna kill him, doing it with a stray bullet in the middle of his arc in a way that does nothing to further anyone else's narrative is at best a cheap emotional punch

death also is the problem though

in a show where mortal wounds seem to pass almost unnoticed amongst our heroes, casual death by a stray bullet is bonkers

in a show where the only real villain is a cruel and corrupt state, to punish with death someone at the mercy of that cruel and corrupt state is bonkers

most importantly: in a show that presented itself as ultimately being about queer outsiders finding family in each other, there's no good reason for any of the foundlings to die

even assuming they're planning some miraculous resurrection for Izzy in s3, they work very hard to show you precisely how dead he is here

they want you to know and believe that he absolutely is dead

Lucius falls into the sea in a way that no one ever once believed actually meant he was dead

in contrast, we watch the light go out of Izzy's eyes after he tells Ed he's ready to go

we see him buried in the dirt

if this truly is meant to be impermanent, then it is even more cruel and meaningless than if they actually just killed him for nothing and no amount of "indestructible little fucker" foreshadowing redeems it

I hate everything about this ending, for everyone involved

it's such a disappointment

#ofmd izzy #izzy hands #ofmd #ofmd s2 #our flag means death season 2 #ofmd spoilers

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that-fanperson-meg · 2 months

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The Breaking of Morning (Rewrite!!)

Cw: angst, child abuse, gore (?)

this is a rewrite of an old TK writing project, I wanted to update it and this is what came out!!! :]

Despite having served in the GSA for years, Nicova could never get to sleep at an acceptable time. Instead he resorted to watching television late into the evening, and waking up late in the afternoon. However, that’d been uprooted when a certain Void-Astral entered the Floralian’s life.

Lycio was an odd case to Nicova, on their first day of training he’d said hadn’t held a sword before, but took to it like second nature. They were also Raymond’s kid, yet Lycio hadn’t heard of Nicova before the two met. It was just oddity after oddity with him.

But did Nicova care about that? Nah!

Sure they could be quiet at times, and often flinched at the sounds of metal blades clashing against each other, but the Floralian chalked it all up to regular Void-Astral instincts.

A commercial flashed onto the screen of the tv, letting Nicova rest his eyes for a moment. Just outside the house, rain whipped and the wind snarled fiercely.

‘Just glad ’m not out in that mess.’ He thought to himself, as he rose from his spot on the couch for more snacks. Though just as he made the corner, a small knock came on the Floralian’s front door. Shaking his head, Nicova thought it was just the wind, because who would be outside in a storm like that?

Setting the bowl on the counter, one of Nicova’s floating hands reached up to grab the box of cookies. But once again, there was the faint sounds of a knock on the door.

One time could be a coincidence, but twice? There had to be someone out there.

Putting the cookie box back on the shelf, the Floralian floated over to the door, half sure that there would be some tourist who’d gotten lost on the way to their hotel.

The glow from the porch light did little to illuminate the darkness of the stormy night, but provided just enough for Nicova to see the figure practically curled into themself sat beside his door.

Their light blue fur was drenched, their antennae were drooped down, and the fine layer of fur on their wings was soaked through.

“Lyci- what are ya’ doing out here?!” He asked, less of an accusation and more as concern.

A second later, the Void-Astral looked up, revealing a golden crescent of where skin and fur had been torn away. Recollections of star warriors in the infirmary with their wounds bleeding through the bandages in the same liquid gold, flashed through the Floralian’s mind.

Without a second thought, Nicova extended one of his hands to the Void-Astral who accepted it a second later.

“You’re gonna be ok, ya’ hear me kiddo?” He said more like a command than as a reassurance.

In no time at all, the two were inside the house and Nicova was preparing to address Lycio’s wound. Moving almost like they were in a dream, the Void-Astral sat down on the couch. Time felt slow, yet everything around him seemed to speed up.

A moment later, their mentor had returned with a pristine white towel, a bowl of water, and bandages. Dunking the towel into the water Nicova held it against Lycio’s wound, neither one daring to say a word.

This process continued for a couple minutes, and the once white towel had become stained gold.

“S’there anywhere else that you’re hurt?” The Floralian asked, his voice faltering for a moment as he looked over the Void-Astral. Lycio shook for no, and Nicova breathed a sigh of relief.

Nodding to himself, a pair of his hands then began applying the bandages. Though he was remaining quiet for Lycio’s sake, Nicova was internally cursing himself out in every way he could think of.

Whenever he met the kid’s sad green eyes, he felt like sobbing beside them. He’d let one of his friends-forget that, Lycio was family- be hurt so badly, once again. The thought ran wild through his brain.

Without realizing it, Nicova mumbled to himself, “Lyci..what happened?”

Estelle’s words replayed, like a broken record:

‘You are a liar and a thief.’

‘Lycia, you’ve forgotten, I have friends in high places.’

‘If you think of running it’s only a matter of time- I can and will find you.’

‘You are lucky that I have mercy, or else I would’ve done much, much worse to you.’

“I…I told my mother about..leaving for the Star Warriors…” their voice broke, “she was so angry- I froze- I didn’t know who to go to- I was stupid. I deserved-“

Before he could finish the fragmented sentence, Nicova shushed them. “Lycio.” He almost never used their full name. “You didn’t deserve this- you never deserved this. You’re a good kid, noi’li o core bulbeli.” He repeated, slipping into the floralian language.

Tears welled in the Void-Astral’s eyes, and with all the strength he could manage, Lycio hugged his mentor- forget that, he was more of a dad than a mentor- burying their face into the softness of Nicova’s cloak.

Neither was sure how much time passed, the world felt distant. The television rambled on about something, the storm outside had moved on, and the coldness that the Void-Astral felt in their body had gone away.

Suddenly, Nicova then broke his hold on Lycio, “oh kiddo! I totally forgot to getcha a blanket- I’ll be back.” He said before walking off down a hallway determined to find the fluffiest blanket he could.

Mind still reeling from the feeling of it all, the Void-Astral ran his paw across the bandaged spot on their face, unsure if it was even real.

Unfortunately, it still was.

Though in a moment of clarity, Lycio remembered the only thing they’d taken with him from the manor; the makeup brush. It was small in size compared to all other Halcandrian artifacts that Estelle decorated her house with, though with its intricate golden handle, it was the most powerful one in her collection.

“‘M back,” the Floralian announced, a blanket being held in his six hands. “Here ya’ go, Lyci.” Nicova said handing them a blanket nearly double the size of him. The Void-Astral threw the blanket over themself, and everything began to go away.

Nicova chuckled to himself, “you good there, Lyci?”

His voice still was hoarse, “I’m doing..better, thank you.”

“I’m going to make tea, you want some?”

Lycio nodded, sinking further into the couch and the blanket. A second later, Nicova went back into the kitchen, setting a kettle onto the stove and grabbing chamomile tea bag out of a box. But while he was busy with the tea, a thought ruminated in the Void-Astral’s mind.

Rising from their coccoon of blankets Lycio grabbed the makeup brush and as quiet as he could, moved towards the bathroom. Pulling a stool from the corner of the room over to the mirror, they looked at the brush in his paw.

They sighed, “I’ve heard talking to Halcandrian artifacts makes them work better so…” his gaze was focused on the mirror, “I learned a long time ago that I wasn’t who my mother wanted me to be.”

Lycio’s breathing hitched, “It’s taken a while for me to be alright with, so please,” their voice wavered. “I wanna look like me.”

After his last words were spoken Lycio paused for a minute, waiting for something to happen with the brush, but it hadn’t. Their green eyes laid disappointed on the artifact, ‘had the magic gone out?’ He asked themself.

Letting out a shaky breath, his wound felt like it was on fire. “What am I going to do now..?”

Lycio picked up the brush, fully ready to sob their eyes out again, disappointed with the way the world loved to taunt him.

Though suddenly- the makeup brush’s bristles began to glow, the hues of a rainbow radiated from the brush. Pure unfiltered power was coursing through the artifact, and while they didn’t know why, the Void-Astral lifted the brush up to his face and felt the warmth of summer come over their body.

Lycio left the bathroom a while later, taking a moment to revel with the new face they found himself looking at in their reflection. Nicova was still in the kitchen, though now he was removing the teabag from the two mugs he’d set out for them.

The Floralian looked up just as his nephew as they walked past.

“Woah, Lyci…” Nicova trailed off, making Lycio nervous as to what he was going to say, “Ya’ look great,” he complimented, letting all of the anxiety go in an instant.

Despite all that had happened, the Void-Astral smiled and for once, their body felt right.

#twilight knight oc #kirby oc #kirby original character #Nicova Volans #Estelle Racheia

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 1 year

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Mature and responsible characters yet rook comes off as the opposite. If you can't tell I would like to know why you love rook so much as he deviates from your usual mature responsible body guard type, the only thing that fits is that ugly haircut

[Referencing this post and this post!]

L i s t e n

I will fight to the bitter death to defend the huntsman’s honor/j 😤

I don’t believe that Rook is “the opposite” of mature and responsible. Sure, he initially comes off as silly and as someone to not be taken seriously, but I think it’s false to say that he isn’t “mature and responsible”. When it comes down to it, he really is wise and dependable, and serves as a good mentor and a protector to others. Rook just so happens to express those qualities in unconventional ways and with a very different personality compared to what we typically think of as a “mature and responsible” character (ie the “big brother”, “dad” “butler”, “bodyguard”, “student council president”, “smart anime glasses man” types, etc).

In reality, Rook is every bit as wise and as dependable as any other upperclassman! He’s the first to support others and to bring up their positive traits even when they don’t see it for themselves; this is most notably seen in episode 5, in which Rook offers pep talks to his juniors (mostly Deuce and Epel) who are struggling to keep up with their VDC training and in Happy Beans Day, when Rook speaks highly of Trey’s skills and experience even when Trey downplays himself. Rook is keenly aware of others’ strengths and weaknesses, and he makes the active decision to support those strengths and how they develop. Recall that it was also Rook that coaxed Epel through the discovery of his unique magic in episode 6, which allowed Epel to take command of it and get them out of a tight pinch. Then, as we see in Glorious Masquerade, Rook takes great pride in seeing the people he has supported blossom and come into their own; he rejoices in Epel’s masterful use of his unique magic and says that he must share the story with their dorm leader upon their return.

Another thing that makes Rook responsible in an odd way is how he decides to take action; he tends to act in very roundabout ways or he plans that involve thinking ahead rather than solve problems head-on. For example, Rook doesn’t tell Vil outright that he needs to be less vain and to accept himself regardless of how the public perceives him; instead, Rook, knowing how headstrong Vil is, suggests that Vil selects Adeuce and Scarabia for the VDC team. Rook believes that exposure to this group is the most positive thing that can be done for Vil given the current circumstances; this is Rook’s way of trying to be responsible for looking after his dear friend and dorm leader without outright shutting down Vil’s hopes and dreams.

Something else I want to point out is that Vil, someone who has extremely high standards for both himself and for others, wouldn’t have picked Rook to serve as his vice dorm leader if he didn’t have faith in him and his abilities. And, indeed, we’ve seen many instances in which Rook fulfills his duties as Vil’s second-in-command to a T. He has had to oversee Pomefiore in Vil’s absence both in the main story and in events (when Vil was kidnapped in episode 6/Ghost Marriage/Endless Halloween Night), reassuring panicked students about Vil’s absence and even figuring out a plan of rescue. Rook was even planning to save Vil all by himself in the main story (until Yuu and Epel demanded he take them with him); he knows when to take bold action, and what lengths he must go to to save and to protect those he cares about. This is arguably much more “dependable” of Rook to do when compared to like... Trey (the TWST character we most likely think of as “dependable” due to the “big brother” tropes he is usually associated with), who stood by and let his dorm leader rampage and unjustly punish several students. While I don’t fault Trey for acting in the way he did (it makes total sense given his history), it just goes to show that just slapping a label on a character doesn’t define their entire existence, whether for Rook, for Trey, or for literally any other character. There will always be instances in which they contradict those labels, or, in cases like Rook, they demonstrate those labels in unorthodox or hard to pinpoint ways.

... Okay, now with that analytical defense out of the way 🤡 I just want to say that Rook 100% has the capability to be a decent butler/bodyguard (ugh, my favorites) between his uncanny attention to detail and his seemingly superhuman senses and strength. But even more appealing than that is just how he’s just so weird at the same time???? I really like characters that can keep me guessing and on my toes... basdfyoasdasbdaAND NOT TO MENTION 😔 I have a weak spot for characters that think first before acting or reacting with violence (which is a laaaarge part of the reason why I much prefer Jade to Floyd).

SIDE NOTE: I know that I joked before about how I like anime men with ugly haircuts, but that’s only technically HALF true, because I think Trey has an ugly haircut as well but he doesn’t appeal to me at all.

All that aside, I’m also allowed to like multiple different tropes!! I’m not beholden to enjoy only one type of character. (This is true for everyone else too; no one should be expected to just like one thing.) A lot of the other TWST characters that rank high on my tier list definitely don’t classify as mature and/or responsible 😂 and likewise, there are many characters that are mature and responsible that don’t rank highly.

Certain personality traits alone aren’t the sole determining factors; I know my own trends and tastes, but I try to consider characters as a whole before deciding how I feel about them.

#Rook Hunt #twst analysis #twisted wonderland analysis #twisted wonderland character analysis #twst character analysis #Rook Hunt thirst #notes from the writing raven #question #trey clover #Epel Felmier #Vil Schoenheit #Pomefiore #spoilers #Deuce Spade

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inusmasha · 8 months

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Just rambling about InuKag dynamics I don't see ppl talk about.

this is 'long post' disclaimer .

Its a ghostly day today, and I have it all to myself. So while defrosting this english muffin I started musing about what sort of dynamics I like most in fiction. Like not just romantic wise. I wanted to figure out what was.. the tension? I enjoyed most... between what two archetypes?

And I what I noticed is that I love a good Mentor/Mentee dynamic. It's something that's been pretttyyyy consistent since childhood. (I can't name any atm to help my argument but you feel compelled to keep reading)

However, I didn't see how this would fit InuKag? My Titanic? My ship of dreams? My childhood? InuKag sometimes stands out like a sore thumb compared to my other interests. I was going to chalk it up to "Well it's baby's first anime so.." UNTIL..

I realized the fandom tends to focus on how Kagome helped Inuyasha (recover his lost heart, humanity, the unconditional selfless love, understanding ect.) but like.. we don't really talk about what he provides for her as much? And I'd love to indulge you with my take but we'd have to go over why I think Kagome decided to leave the modern world and opt for a life in wilderness of the Feudal Era.

Yes, yes. A big part is Inuyasha. That is a huge driving factor. But Im saying step back and see what's happening in the grand scheme of things.

I think..for Kagome..her romance with Inuyasha acted as a portal to a type of freedom she didn't know she craved. He acts as a guide of sort. He gives her access and safe passage to explore this dangerous world fully without fear. It reminds me of when I was with my first bf and I was over the moon happy when I realized I could walk around at night with him. It was THRILLING to my sheltered teen ass. It was like I was holding the key to the VIP room. I was allowed backstage. He was a door that opened me up to new experiences that would not of been available to me at that time otherwise!

And then the benefit of being immersed in nature. With your lover. Who is a figure that exists outside of the society that was keeping you locked up in the first place. Kagome's name is also referencing 'a bird in a cage'.

Like?

Kagome also serves as a guide for Inuyasha. She brings him back from the liminal space of the forest to the village/community/connection. Again opening him up to the possibility of trusting others and forming bonds and setting down roots in the village.

Kagome also represents us the Audience. She is our perspective. She is "The Ordinary Teenage Girl". She's pulled into the well like we are being pulled into the narrative. She grapples with her identity. Her purpose. Her abilities. She's lip singing to Kelly Clarkson with her hairbrush in front of the mirror. She's trying to get to school but...OOP...You know what? I'm 16. I'm suddenly in a fairy tale. The faries spirited me away and I can't take the test right now. The magical jewel was in my hip you see. I'll think about high school entrance exams later when I'm done shooting my sparkly arrows.

You can't sit there and tell me that you didn't long to escape the druggery that came after graduating lol? The what so I do now? The who am I ? And where do I belong? What major do I want? I have to buy a house now? No? I have to fix my credit score-

No babe. You're going to hitch a ride on your bf's back with ya hair down and eat fruit by a waterfall. He's going to ask you wtf a test is to the sound of a million birds chirping in the morning. Then you're going to go back to your loving village that welcomes you home and calls you a hero.

It makes sense that she stayed. It makes sense. You just gotta... see the vision.. you gotta FEEEEL the escapism.

Anyway yeah lol. Not really a mentor to each other per say but their meeting was a catalysis for a lot of growth and learning and trials and tribulations that changed them for the better. And it just feels similar.

#inuyasha #inukag #does anyone else have patterns?#“THERE'S PATTERNS AND YOURE LAUGHING??”#My uterus is shedding as we speak #Kagome could of easily had this dynamic with Kikyo toooo #anyway inuyasha is an honorary lesbian lol #i feel like the mentor & mentee dynamic might be my queerness talking too...hmm #love is a portal and stuff #ah to be a woman #ramble #rambles

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katyspersonal · 1 month

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3 for Aldrich, Aldia, Willem & Laurence

9 for Maria

11 for Micolash & Aldrich

24 for Laurence

(Asks from this ( x ) meme)

3) What first drew you to this character?

As for Aldrich, I vaguely recall finding out that he checks the traits I like the most? He was one of the characters I've learned about through fandom and not on my own, and I think this ancient meme about summarises it:

Also:

@val-of-the-north SHUDDUP you're basically so horny for Laurence/Logarius/Snatchers that you can't even picture them in your mind in any way but being naked!!!!!!! *casts the stone back at u*

With Laurence, like with Mico, it was the very first glance at the character in Youtube compilation with boss themes and concept art image. I did not know the lore yet, but the design and the music made me imagine Laurence as sort of aged, sagely librarian. I could not imagine back then that his boss fight would be him being a "helpless abhorrent little mewmew" as kids call it! Heck, I thought he'd have dialogue despite the monster form x) In a way, my first impression was not wrong, with the cut content of him actually talking even in a beast form, and implication of him being a son of Cainhurst cut content librarian NPC! I have intuition for cut content before having information, hahaha!

I have nothing to say about Willem. It might be a memory gap thing, but I swear at some point I feel I was turned off and then booted back up with liking this character already installed in my system x) As for Aldia.... ugh for fuck's sake... yeah, it was this legend:

youtube

I was absolutely floored by this stupid vid even without knowing any context, but I also instantly liked this character. I didn't even know his name yet, but the voice acting and long yapping about philosophy already pulled me in XD (Also unironically, this video is precisely how I give relationship advice fhfhdds)

9) Does this character remind you of anyone you know? Does that affect how you see them?

Yeah, I know this person. I know them very well. I know them more than anyone else. Someone who was misguided (by their destructive influence mentor figure, by their own foolishness and past history, or combination of both, who can tell anymore?) into committing awful things, then despaired over their sins and attempted redemption but also failed in some way? This person is me. At some point I've found myself in front of horrible truth about my past life and personality, and knew I was guilty and sullied forever. That it was over for me as a human being, but that didn't matter, and I could only keep people safe by locking myself away and trying to serve something better.

......annnnd it took a few years of more informed people to (metaphorically) shake me and slap my face into lucidity, explaining to me that I've fallen for the "BPD demonization" that was going far beyond than my individual failure as a friend, and we are always accused of abuse and causing irreversible harm when the worst we do is being emotionally overbearing. I kept losing trust to those friends, telling them that they were enablers who tried to gaslight me into thinking I was not 'that much of a monster', until it was other people with BPD who 'shook me and slapped my face into lucidity'. xd Nonetheless, even though now I know the truth about how society treats BPDs, I remember the feeling of being so monstrous and harmful that I was not even allowed to "touch" people with my dirty hands, how my reality used to be. So, I could write Maria going through this effortlessly, especially considering what she did was more plain and tangible!

In fact... thank you for asking me about this, because I kept wondering why I had such frequent dreams about being Maria, and why the Maria in my dreams acts like abused child that took back control against Gehrman despite my portrayal of the guy being so different. And now the puzzle is solved! That part of me still lives inside, it seems.

11) How did you “fall in love” with this character?

Already answered this for Micolash here: ( x )! As for Aldrich, it was through properly analysing the bigger picture and context of his actions. I've figured that his madness was, in fact, being informed on what was far too ahead of everyone else around him! He, like the rest of the cast, is trapped in the rotting, doomed world in which the only choices are 1) "die with dignity" or 2) commit something unthinkable from moral standpoint for a chance to escape. And will morality of the rotting world will matter in the new world anyways? Won't it all be left behind and be forgiven?

The guy also tried to take everyone else he could with him, like sort of a fucked up Noah's Arc! I can tell that they reused the concept with Rykard, at least, I am glad they know what works xD I'd say that the sadism he experienced upon eating people was either result of insanity (he understood a thing no one should understand), or still didn't exclude the bigger purpose (egotistically revelling in how holy he is helping everyone and doing what no one else dared, which would be like my Laurence). In any case, I have the strongest respect to the courage it takes to transcend the bonds of morality and compassion in order to to greater good. Being burdened with the knowledge of how the world really works, and choosing to push through instead of still being bound... This is why I also like Fauxsefka; learning how this world works, she chose to turn people into Kin so they can't ever become beasts. I am weak for this trope, you don't understand.

24) Do you ever dream about this character? If so, describe a dream you once had about them.

Laurence appears in my dreams only in two contexts: 1) Micolaurence or 2) dreams about finding secret files in Bloodborne that reveal his canonical appearance before beasthood! I can tell the latter comes from my everlasting unsatisfaction with my design for him, because I love it but it doesn't feel "fitting" and I can't identify why!

The former, I think, fandom rubbing onto me x) In two of these dreams, I was Laurence. In other two, I was Micolash. In one of Laurence dreams it was mutual, in the second one I was in love unrequited. In one of Micolash dreams, it was mutual, and in another it was not.. Basically, my dreams allows me to experience this ship from every possible angle. o_o Waiting for more I guess fhhdfsfd

______________

Thank you for asking! And.. without exaggeration, you've just done quite a psychological work on me by just asking the right thing. I need to think about that, hahaha

#bloodborne #dark souls 3 #aldrich devourer of gods #laurence the first vicar #soulsborne #ask replies #personal #memories #dreams #honestly I remember Maria in my dreams hiding in the closet like an abused bullied child.. that big strong woman reduced to this #and I finally know why it was this way #I'd rather not sully Gehrman with something as dirty as my stepdad of course he deserves so much more and he is his own man #I just don't like the approach of turning characters with their own stories and personality into vessels for my trauma #it feels like frenzied flame: you got infected by it and you have unending need to spread it. to scorch the world in your pain.#I don't think this approach would help my healing but instead make me feel worse by nourishing the trauma #I am keeping it sealed away from the world forever now </3 #see this is why it hurts me so much when gehrman haters accuse me of being insensitive to people that want to project their negative-#-experiences with men and misogyny onto him even if that means twisting the actual story and character. I do have a reason to do it myself #I just choose not to because I personally dislike the idea of making fandomry about myself more and about source material less #I don't want to bring the pain and horrors inside me into something that doesn't have them. some things can stay clean!#the passive aggression between canon worshippers and fanon enforcers is something that cannot be avoided in the fandoms #and I disapprove of the lie about 100% peace and mutual respect between the 'camps'. we will never FULLY like each other #each thinks their approach is more productive for the community. and that's fine!

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sylvaridreams · 1 year

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3 and 11 for Alba? :D

GW2 asks -- I have no idea how to do readmores on mobile anymore oops.

3. What person impacted them the most?

I think it's impossible to take this role without being constantly changed by the people around you, so there's a piece of everyone in Alba at this point. But as far as who had the biggest impact on Alba, it's either Trahearne or Forgal.

Awakening from the dream and being told "Hey, your destiny must be to kill an elder dragon, off you go!" is something that's so tragic for sylvari commanders--being literally born for this war and sent to finish it from the moment you open your eyes. Trahearne initially served as a mentor figure to look up to, a guide of how to chase your Wyld Hunt. But with time and as they grew closer, he also taught Alba balance and grace, how to complete your quest without letting it consume you--ironically, because he often saw Trahearne completely consumed by his own Hunt. And now Alba has followed in his footsteps in forgetting that there needs to be balance in your life, and now he himself is consumed by being The Commander. Oops!

Forgal was initially dismissive of Alba, making him prove himself time and time again--but having to work for his approval, while frustrating and confusing at first for him as a sapling, kept Alba humble and overall taught him to earn everything. You don't ever just get to walk into some new place and announce "I'm the commander, I'm in charge, you have to respect me" and be taken seriously. You have to work for respect, and work on love, every single time and forever and ever after that too. Forgal was also his first big feeling of loss, which he blamed himself for and thought "oh I'll never feel as bad as this again" AND YET...

11. How accurate is their reputation/image compared to how they really are?

His reputation precedes him as this very serious leader, as a genius strategist and a charming smooth talker. Any person that's actually met him has probably seen a hint of his skills at some point, i.e. "he had some crazy plan that shouldn't have worked but it did" and "somehow he talked us out of this situation, idk how because we should have been killed!" --in other words, SOMEHOW he did something mildly impressive and survived, and these firsthand accounts of "I guess he was good at this" gets turned into second and third hand accounts of dashing charm and wits. Alba was Vigil first and foremost; his strategy most times is "Let's go in and hit that thing until it stops moving and see where we stand then." Having to sneak strategically through the front lines of Joko's army was the worst thing ever for him, Canach practically had to hold his hand and walk him through that shit.

People also tend to think he's stoic in an interesting, mysterious way when really he's just kind of shy. He withdraws from social situations when possible. Often he just feels he doesn't "belong" in these situations, or being involved with groups socially.

So um. Not accurate at all lol.

#alba #asks answered

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variousqueerthings · 2 years

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hmmmmmmmmm -- I needed this off my chest first and then I can talk about where I’m sitting with the show as a whole moving forwards + the individual things I really did love

this season really did hit home the intentions for the rest of the show I think, which is what I thought it would/where I was saving a lot of my ideas for how I might approach the rest of the story

unfortunately the overall narrative as a whole ultimately didn’t land for me

Gen: the middle set up some interesting concepts and the last two episodes let them drop like lead (the first few episodes were very good for daniel and very bad for johnny and so-so spread across the kids)

my friend said it best: “they keep hinting at unconventionality/strong development and then they get scared and walk it back right after in favour of playing it safe and repeating the same structures again and again” (ex. sam’s dream sequence, chozen training the kids and being an obvious alt mentor for hawk, the three boys sitting on the couch and agreeing amongst one another who was going to fight in the tournament, tory coming to sam for help, the daniel/johnny/chozen/amanda team-up, etc)

people are making the same choices over and over, except at some point a switch is flipped to randomly say this time the choice is good for some reason -- this time johnny being a father will work because? this time the straight romances work because? this time it can be solved with a tournament because?

obviously I’m not a fan of johnny being a father for many reasons, but it’s crazy to me that the motivations he’s been building for four seasons -- being a father to his sons -- isn’t as important anymore

and the last thing is that things went so damn fast this season? sam needed time to figure out herse- oops, she’s ready to get into a relationship again. miguel has concerns about his family situati- nope he’s good again. daniel is terrified of silver who’s promising even wor- oh ok he’s beating him up now in front of an audience (using the quicksilver techniques???)

also... unfortunately this season was so straight, it was as if they saw all the ways we were reading the previous two seasons as Very Gay and desperately tried to course correct -- similar to the first point “hinting at unconventionality” we had these little moments where there was some really interesting dynamic that didn’t have to be queer to be clear, but did make things clear about the focus of the narrative

miguel and robby and hawk had several interesting moments around the idea of what they represented as “champions” (miguel and robby in particular had some interesting things to work through and getting to see that over time would have been great) -- but then robby is going back to tory and miguel to sam (hawk was a secondary character which actually served him very well imo, in the sense that he wasn’t tossed into pointless drama directions)

tory is obviously sam’s foil and has been for the past few seasons, and it was particularly obvious in the dream sequence of this exact season... but then they weren’t really important to one another for the rest of the season (apart from a single moment of sam helping her fight kim da eun, which was then a moment replaced by devon, i guess)

daniel and johnny and chozen and amanda had so much when they were onscreen together in different constellations, but then johnny had to constantly be pulled back by this pregnancy plot and chozen apparently has always been desperately in love with kumiko?

#cobra kai first thoughts #we watched the whole season and we're talking about it like we're philosophers and it's much deeper than it is #ck negativity #i'll write some positivity next #this fandom has some of my favourite writers and artists in it #and i hope you continue to write and make art about the bits of the story you really resonate with #rambleramble

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disgruntleddemon · 2 years

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I want to hear more about your hypothetical Antfur MAP. How would you pace it, if that makes any sense?? What would happen at the end of the song, where the mouse dies?

oh thank you! i always feel so honored whenever ppl take an interest on my aus, hcs/or map ideas hjkjhjkj

ok so i've definitely forgotten a bit of how i'd do the map, but i'll show the lyrics and the vague ideas i have for what would be happening for each scene. it's kind of long, so i'm gonna put it under the cut.

as for pacing, i definitely have hard time figuring it out. there's just a lot that happens. the song is pretty long tho, so that does help a bit. i think i have the most trouble with his head injury, his death, and his time in the df/starclan. especially cause i always picture it to one section of the song.

this would probably be a bit of Antfur at the church, and then moving to shadowclan feeling hopeful and excited. he has sort of an idealized view of how things are gonna go

this would be Antfur asking his mentor Stonewing about starclan n stuff

Antfur worried he doesn't belong in Shadowclan, also probably worried that he's not allowed in starclan

him having his first battle and feeling very shaken up by it, trying to reassure himself he is a proper clan cat

snow transition to leafbare, with Antfur huddled up in the warriors den. he gets up, determined to keep trying to hunt

dealing with winter, his personal worries, and probably encouraging Blazefire and Cinnamontail. towards the end, it transitions to when snow is starting to melt, and he gets hit in the head by a branch with the hunting patrol

inbetween the these lines and the next ones we see Antfur look dazed and then later in the med den trying to leave still determined to hunt

Antfur out hunting, still clearly dazed. he sees the squirl and chases it up a tree. at the end of "they must want to be friends" he falls and it briefly cuts to black.

at "my stomach starts to turn with thirst, why does it hurt?" we see his ghost reacting to his dead body with horror. near the end we see Ashfur off to the side. "at my just dessert is served, dig in" Ashfur tackles him, and also acts as the transition to the next scene.

Antfur jerks up, and looks around, confused and scared. he's in the dark forest on the little island.

at "now as i lay me down to sleep" we see a more zoomed out view as slowly more and more ghost cats appear, till it's almost crowded on the island.

at "i expect no dreams and no sweet goodbye to me" we see possessed cats fighting everyone

and then at "flatline in the morning light" Ashfur dies and the cats are freed.

Antfur rly just does feel "that was it? all that, and for what?" the cats start to make their way towards starclan (which is the moon lol)

cats are all crowded and talking in starclan. lots of tearful reunions. Antfur doesn't have anyone waiting there for him, he feels isolated and lonely (probably have a scene with lots of activity happening, while he sort of stands there dejectedly)

Conefoot and Frondfur briefly come up to them. he reasures them and shoos them back to their family at "mind me not and i'll mind my own"

at "and my mind held the same light as the one in your eyes" he watches everyone sadly for a moment before walking off to an isolated spot. he looks down on earth below

Antfur sings the first few lines to himself, still looking down on earth. after that we see Cinnamontail down on earth looking up at the moon. probably a split screen with the two of them. after a moment they both get up and start to leave. at that, we cut back to just Antfur.

from there i'd probably have the sound of people talking in the background be Antfur rejoining the other starclan cats. he watches them whistfully, as they don't even rly look at him. at the mousetrap sound effect, it cuts to black

for the map i'd probably wanna focus heavily on Antfur's emotions y'know? he has it pretty rough, but tries so hard to be brave and do his best. but i imagine tbc really wore him down. Conefoot and Frondfur rly are the only starclan cats he would know. and they're part of a big family with lots of cats in starclan. not to mention the fact they were born in shadowclan.

i don't imagine Antfur is sitting there like "man, i wish Cinnamontail and Blazefire would hurry up and die already" but it's definitely gotta be an isolating feeling. i like to imagine him watching Cinnamontail and her new kits from straclan, so happy for her, but sad he can't meet them yet and be a cool uncle lol

i dunno, i just have a lot of feelings on this guy. if i could do a map, this would def be one of the main ones i would want to do

#thanks again for the ask!!#i love talking about stuff!#Antfur #warrior cats

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kombat-time · 2 years

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Johnny Cage for your AU! ^_^ Also, Raiden! If thats not too much!

>:3c

We'll be doing both bc I have Many Thoughts for both. This may be rambly dfbhsdfh

First up is Johnny Cage!

His main role in the story is to sorta be. "The Guy Who Doesn't Quite Know What's Going On, But Somehow He's On Par With A Lot Of People".

This is someone who's been doing martial arts since he was a kid, not because he had to (like Liu Kang, Sub-Zero, etc.) or because he was training to use them in actual combat (like Sonya, Kano, etc.), but because he was a kid who liked action movies and wanted to be like his favorite characters/actors.

This is also someone who knows that there's... something weird with him, but doesn't like to acknowledge it beyond quips and whatnot.

He has nightmares of things that don't make sense to him (sometimes things that he has deja vu over later, sometimes things that make the news later and he realizes that they had been going on at the same time as the dream).

And of course, that's nothing compared to the fact that he's a walk special effect machine (not that he does too much with his... "abilities" during shooting aside from his whole "shadow kick" shtick).

He feels wildly out of depth, but would rather die than admit that honestly, so he acts as his usual self: arrogant and uncaring of anything but himself. Unfortunately, this does not earn him many friendship points at first, so over the course of the tournament he has to learn some humility, and how to push aside his pride.

(And of course, this is only his stuff for the first tournament. Just wait until all the stuff that comes later >:3c)

NOW! It's time for my fave thunder god, Raiden!

Raiden is... old. Almost as old as Earthrealm (which, in turn, means he's almost as old as the realms as a whole). He was created from a storm (the same as his "younger" brother, Fujin, who is only considered to be younger because he was created second) by the Elder Gods themselves to serve as protector as Earthrealm.

With age comes knowledge and, unfortunately, heartbreak. He loves humanity, with their randomness and innovation and skill, all without magic being a major part of their lives. But he has watched them harm and be harmed, mostly by each other, in wars of their own making.

And then, Shao Kahn of Outworld began Mortal Kombat, and Raiden's faith began to truly be shaken. His heart had always, and he's sure will always, hold a love for humanity, but his faith in their ability to protect themselves was holding on by a thread.

When the Great Kung Lao won, Raiden held onto that single thread for dear life, all the way until GKL's defeat at the hands of Prince Goro.

As of the time of the modern tournament, he is back to where he was prior to GKL's victory: He wants to believe in humanity, but he cannot find it in himself to do so. He loves them, but he is almost sure that they will not win once more, and is about ready to give up entirely.

He's very... bitter, in a lot of ways. He knows that he could win the tournament, if he were allowed to compete, but he's not, and that just frustrates him further.

He is a mentor figure, but... not quite the "wise and old" kind. More "frustrated, bitter, but he has a job to do, and by the Elder Gods he will do it".

So. His whole arc is going to be him learning to believe in humanity once more, and evolve into his true form: Rai-dad (this is only a half joke).

But yea! That's them fbhdsbhf

#mortal kombat #johnny cage #raiden #twilly talks #retelling au #thats what ill call this from now on i think #thanks for the ask viv!!#i have no idea if any of this is coherent dshbfsd #many thoughts head full

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black-metal-bard · 1 year

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@isolationstreet I accidentally reblogged the ask game to my main, so I screenshotted your ask to post it on this blog lol

Thank you so much for asking 🥺💕 You came for my throat with your choice of questions

First, here’s a picture I drew of my party and a bunch of important NPCs so you can put names to faces.

Now I’m putting the answers under a cut, because this got REALLY long

2: Before they met their party, what was their main goal?

To be honest, Meliora’s primary goal was to see as much of the vastness of the world as she possibly could—learn all the stories she could learn—meet some interesting people and perhaps make a few stories of their own. In her travels, she often helped the restless dead gain the closure they needed to properly move on(and grant closure to their friends and families by serving as a medium, given she’s a Spirit Bard), but as worthwhile as she found that, her only real purpose was to have a pretty good time lol

Actually, the biggest reason she joined the party was because she had a feeling that Yevelda(the party’s Barbarian) would have a story worth telling someday, and she wanted to be there to experience it first hand.

15: Do they trust their party? Why or why not?

This one is complicated, and depends largely on what point in the campaign one asks. Generally speaking, Mel “trusts” people by default(she trusts people to be themselves—she generally avoids being in a position where she feels threatened—though, she doesn’t exactly have a great sense of self-preservation due to her complicated relationship with Death, so it actually does take a lot for her to feel THREATENED).

At the beginning of the campaign, she had a default level of trust in the party, even if she SHOULDN’T have (Balasar, our Cleric, had previously had his Paladin powers revoked long before the campaign for having killed very VERY many innocent Tiefling civilians—Mel is able to hear their screams on him even still, but by the time she meets him he has been atoning for years, and she’s interested in seeing what happens with him)

Mel is (unknowingly)essentially a Demi-Demon who’s Sphere is “Love for the Undeserving”, so she’s willing to extend a lot of perhaps unwise trust.

Now, toward the end of where we’ve played to so far, the only party member(not including NPCs) who Mel trusts is Yevelda. When Balasar impulsively killed Cassie—our mentor’s niece(and in doing so caused his own undoing) Mel believed that it was on purpose, so she’s very hurt believing their entire relationship had been a lie and that perhaps if she hadn’t been so willing to give him a chance Cassie would be alive(Mel was also able to tell he was a half-dragon, not a dragonborn like he said. Her half-dragon “Cousins” lie about what they are to avoid prejudice, so Mel never pushed the issue with Balasar because she felt it wasn’t her business—now, she wonders just how many other lies he fed her. In truth though, Balasar did believe he was a Dragonborn; he suffers from amnesia, and the people who found him thought he was a Dragonborn due to his wings having been ripped off before they found him. It’s a very big misunderstanding, but of course, it makes Mel regret trusting him.)

She hated Laucian(Warlock) ever since he called Trevor(my favorite NPC) “Worthless” during a moment where he actually opened his heart to us. Laucian later tried to schmooze up to Trevor in hopes of becoming a vampire(it did NOT work) and that made Mel decide then and there that Laucian was a slimy weasel who didn’t care for anything but his own power.

A bit later, she discovered that Insouciance(Dream Druid) was holding their mentor, Blake’s, soul prisoner inside of himself; so she could no longer trust him. Blake had done so much for the party(and is kind of like a father figure—Mel is particularly close to Blake’s family because their culture is very similar to her own), it was unthinkable to Meliora that Insouciance would hurt Blake like that.

Mel didn’t really get to know Anec Su(Cleric), as they didn’t have a lot of time together before this chapter of the campaign ended and Mel left Earth behind. Mel however, wasn’t as quick to trust her as she normally is, since Anec Su came through a portal with Marcus(now 22, having been 8 when he first left us—only ten days ago in our time, so it was weird for us that he came back a grown man telling us that he’s spent most of the last 14 years of HIS life in The Worst Timeline trying to find a way to bring Cassie back to life—she was like a big sister/caretaker to him) but given that Anec Su was FROM that Dark Timeline, AND she radiated a horribly familiar energy, Mel never quite warmed up to her. (Anec Su was a cleric of Sibuna, the Balance God that Balasar and his evil Dracolich father merged to become—she had different personalities in the day and the night—Night Anec Su hated Tieflings and Fiends in general due to her world being overrun with demons, and Day Anec Su hated the undead—Mel being a Necromancer who surrounds herself with vampiric loved ones, neither side of Anec Su was fond of her.

This left Yevelda as the only Party Member Mel could still trust by the end—and now she’s dead. (That said, though she trusts Yevelda implicitly, their relationship became somewhat strained when Mel sided with Blake’s family when they attacked Balasar for killing Cassie. Yevelda and Balasar were a bounty hunting duo before Mel and Insouciance joined the party, so she took great offense to one of her own being attacked, and she was upset that Mel—Balasar’s Lover—sided with Blake’s family. So while Mel trusted Yevelda, Yevelda became unsure of where she stood, since Mel made it clear that her loyalties weren’t necessarily with the party.)

27: How do they mourn?

I LOVE this question. As a Spirit Bard and Necromancer, Mel’s mourning process is incredibly unconventional—and before she came to Earth, she honestly never did any mourning. Since Mel’s powers allow her to interact with ghosts(and she developed that ability as a child) the dead were never GONE to her—nothing lost, nothing to mourn. Consensual Necromancy is actually a huge aspect of the commune she grew up in, as they hold an annual festival where the ghosts of all their departed rise from their graves to join the festivities.

For much of her life, when OTHERS were in mourning, she was often able to provide closure by acting as a medium to give them a real goodbye with their loved ones.

Things changed when the party came to Earth, and Meliora learned of the “Final Death” that the vampires of Earth experience(due to their tattered souls not having enough substance to leave a ghost behind in death). Having lived over twenty five years without the full force of death actually touching her, it hit her like a fucking freight train the first time she was forced to mourn like everyone else. She was unable to let go—pouring over her magical study in a desperate bid to recover what had been lost. She’s gone full Mad Scientist about it—refusing to accept that Cassie is actually GONE—and it actually looks like she might be right.

When she receives news of Yevelda’s death, however, she’s devastated. Yevelda comes from a culture where they have a heavy emphasis on their afterlife, and when her half-brother’s half-brother died the family rejected Mel’s offer to give them a last goodbye—so Mel respects Yevelda too much to disturb her afterlife. There is no bringing her back because she would not WANT to come back.

Meliora lives with deep regret that she opted not to return to Earth, feeling that she should have been at Yevelda’s side—maybe it wouldn’t have made a difference, maybe she’d be dead too, but now she’ll never know.

That regret is what drives Meliora to become the mentor figure(NPC in my part of the campaign) to a new batch of young adventurers. She doesn’t want what happened to her friends and to Earth to ever happen again.

64: Do they value Mercy or Justice more?

Mel believes there is no real Justice without Mercy. Merciless Justice is just perpetuating a violent cycle in her eyes—even if the Mercy is only Death as opposed to eternal torture. Mel has no qualms about killing—but she’s never felt any need to “justify” it. Her relationship with death before coming to Earth left her VERY disconnected from the idea of Killing, since death has no tangible finality to her.

Once she comes to Earth and learns of final death, she would very much rather reach reconciliation than truly destroy a person.

That said, before she understood the concept of Final Death, she DID murder a weaker Vampire(Mel is a serial killer on Earth—she gets vengeance for the ghosts of murder victims so they can finally pass on. It isn’t about “Justice”, it’s about Mercy for the Ghosts trapped on Earth). Though she killed that Vampire to achieve closure for his victim, she’s haunted by the knowledge she now has that she utterly removed the man from existence.

#dnd #dungeons and dragons #THANK YOU FOR ASKING #ask game #Meliora OC

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nightcall99 · 16 days

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Dreams from 10.4.24

Dream 1 I was at work, serving a girl at the counter and I was telling her about her new medication. It was something for ADHD. I was listing some of the potential side effects, probably the psychiatric ones like anxiety, agitation, restlessness etc. And then she said something off-beat that I wasn't expecting. She said, "It doesn't matter I guess. This game has maxed out right? What else is there?". I knew instantly what she meant. She was talking about the mundaneness of it all, and how we cannot attain anything higher than this. I replied, "Yeah, I mean, we wake up and then we go back to sleep and it's all on repeat". That moment felt so real. The exchange between us was so true and honest. Something opened up, or got pulled back, an aliveness was injected into that moment. But as soon as it happened, I seemed to go back into auto-pilot instantly, as if I was sweeping what had happened under the rug. Perhaps that moment had been too real, and it freaked me out. Or perhaps, I felt the out-of-placeness too keenly and wanted to return things to order. I was glad of this moment of connection however, that we both deeply understood that we are in a matrix and things are always going to be the same. I kept going on with my usual script. I talked about the other non-psychiatric side effects and she was quiet and listening, but deep down I was elated at what had happened.

Dream 2 The same happened with MN. I was talking to him about something, I can't remember what and then it's like he gained consciousness for a second. He said something in reply to what I said, something like "The only true peace is silence". He would never say something like that irl. In that moment, I kept thinking about how to respond to him. I wanted to say something back with the same poignancy but I couldn't think of what. It's like the world opened up for a bit, with how real he was being. It was less about what was said and more the energy that was felt. I was struck with it. And then just like that, it was gone as quickly as it appeared.

Dream 3 I was walking in the street and I saw a puppy escaping someone's property. It ran out into the street and I picked it up, not wanting it to get lost or injured. It was absolutely adorable, black and white and so tiny, it pretty much fit in one hand. I looked into the person's land and realised that this puppy was but one animal of a small farm. I walked into the property and found the owner, and I realised it was someone I knew. I don't know them irl, but in the dream, this figure was someone who had been a mentor to me at some point. I gave her back the dog and explained that it had gotten loose. I think at that moment I also saw another one of her animals, maybe a different dog or a sheep, and marvelled at how quickly it had grown. They were only a baby the last time I was here, and now it had fully grown into an adult. Then we got talking about other things and she expressed to me her disappointment about how I had not stayed on to work for her. I think I had completed a trial run on this farm some time ago and at the time, she had high hopes for me. I think I had agreed to her offer of employment but then I disappeared or something. As she told me the truth of how she felt, her honesty, coupled with the out-of-the-blueness in her expression of it, made the moment feel so real. It was just like with the previous two dreams, I wasn't expecting it. However, I didn't feel like explaining myself, it was none of her business why I decided to leave, even if she was a very nice lady. I just kind of waved my hands in a gesture of I-don't-know and said, "Look I can't really say much but I will say that I really looked up to you as a mentor and you were wonderful as that". She was glad for the compliment and then we talked about something else.

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quadquest64 · 2 months

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The Day I Met Tucker Max (& He Crushed My Confidence)

I am a man of many of L’s but there’s one that stands alone in its sheer arrogance. The day I tasted complete defeat at the hands of my (digital) mentor Tucker Max. Eleven years ago to this day over the course of a single coffee, I got bodied, broken, and bowed beneath the man who taught me to write offensively & use my words to throw a punch (drunk). This is a piece on why it’s probably the best thing that could have happened to my drive, my goals, and of course my dum dum twenty-two year ‘ole brain.

Don’t worry, we’ll arrive at the carnage soon but TL;DR, being utterly and effortlessly dismantled by one of the three foundations of your writing styles, two foundations of Fratire, and single favorite people will do things to your self-esteem. In my case, it ended in a very long nap (as is tradition for insurmountable boss battles), a very long & uncompromising look at my then current level, and a very long (but immensely rewarding) journey back to the basics. To inevitably head towards a total fundamental mastery of “most” of the skills I started to eyeball over seventeen years ago. Sound boring?? Good, bud, I didn’t want you here anyways. Back to Babar and let the actual adults discuss their craft.

Like any sane person, I can remember exactly where I was when I read “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell” for the first time. My junior year at Allen High a buddy gave me the book that would permanently alter my brain chemistry. She is (un)-ironically now an uber conservative Christian who trembles in my presence, refuses to make eye contact, and deleted me off Facebook. Can’t imagine why. Anyways, to be crystal clear, I’ve alwaaaaays been a bookworm. It is arguably my strongest skill, and surely the one I’ve conquered several times over. I distinctly remember being a regular reader by daycare, my dream career being an author by third grade, and starting my Stephen King collection soon after (explains a lot, I know).

Up until that point the funniest thing I had ever read outright was “You are not Dave Chappelle, and you are not funny” by the pre-social media Pirate King himself Maddox. Up until that point, a short story had never reduced me to tears, let alone a string of them. Up until that point I had not realized I had the capacity to work as a comedy writer. IHTSBIH changed the trajectory of my life’s work in under twenty minutes. I can still hear the click of the key turning in my head. Feel the gears whirl. If not the specific story, I still remember the specific thought branded into my brain.

“I can do this”

So did it I did. Like I said I had always wanted to be a writer for near as long as I could remember but I didn’t know what exactly I wanted write to or was capable of. I am primarily a fiction reader, but I am definitely not a fiction writer. My fiction muscle shines in comedy, satire, and group endeavors. In terms of fantasy, I’m probably not going to the next J.K. Rowling (praise the Lord for large favors). Tucker inspired me to pursue a different path. Maddox was a major early influence too but for different reasons. Maddox taught me how to break targets down, Tucker taught me how to build tales from scratch (truly the Hunter S. Thompson of the 21st Century). I figured if I focused my left brain on a distinct satirical edge, and my right side on producing & perfecting my storytelling skills, I’d have a solid basis for the brand I wanted to build. Left for building, and right for destruction. I had the blueprint; the next step was the application.

The first thing I did was start throwing parties. The second thing was to start writing about them. I organized too many shin-dings to count honestly. I didn’t truly grasp the impact at the time, but this came with the perk of a built-in audience. Everyone’s an egotist, and once you start scribbling about the squad, it quickly becomes a defining characteristic. I was also extremely fortunate to have been a part of the Myspace to Facebook era of teenagers. Listen to Grandpa Simpin when he tells you that pre-meme & Chaperon sites, it was the fucking Wild Wild Web. Extremely fertile grounds for the taking & easy to carve out a slice for yourself if you occupy the right niche, possess the adequate amount of bloodlust, or like me had both in spades.

From The Archives

Date: February 9, 2013 at 2:49:40 AM EST

“I started writing sporadically soon after. It wasn’t pretty. In terms of writing skills during and post high school, I was very rough. The ideas were there but I had trouble fully forming them, and the execution was far from consistent. My formula for an article consisted of me thinking about something for weeks, or even months, and then getting enough motivation or hate fuel to write a note. Even at eighteen, I recognized the fact that I had to learn how to write at will, not just when the fancy struck me.

I embarked on a campaign to write at least one article a week for a year. Fortunately, I was in a position to allow me to fully immerse myself into writing like a crackhead. The goal of the mission was to radically increase my writing stamina in a short amount of time. While proficiency with grammar and punctuation was an ability I needed to learn, I decided to neglect the proofreading aspect. There’s no point to learning advanced athletic techniques without having the strength or drive to execute them. I instead focused on high intensity first drafts, learning how to translate my concepts into my work properly, and finding a writing style that wasn’t only comfortable for me but entertaining for my readers.

Learning to fight online was also essential for the genre my writing fell in. My articles in their very nature are invites to conflict and if I wasn’t capable of defeating if not holding my own against every one of my friends on Facebook, then it was foolish to think I could do anything against the many enemies I’d surely make on the rest of the Web. Much like my writing, my argument ability was feral, undefined, and only learnable by copious amounts of sheer repetition. Not only did I need to learn how to write, but I needed to teach myself to annihilate people with hellish precision, relentless ferocity, and uncompromising logic.

For about eight months, I did just that and then I hit a wall. My ambition was no longer satisfied with the level I had been writing at. I was getting bored. My goal had been accomplished. In about eight months, I had managed to write somewhere around 220,000 words. Granted it was all first draft nonsense, but the fact remains that a goodish length for a novel is 80,000 words. I may not have mastered the ability to write at will, but I had surely learned it.

My ideas for subject matter also began to expand. I wanted to write more personal pieces, but I would have felt severely uncomfortable about writing about myself so intimately to people I might actually run into in real life, or hangout with. It’s a little too close to those people who live their lives through their Facebook statuses. My insult ability had also evolved to the point where I had continuously and actively hold myself back. I knew all my friends far too well and became far too adept at hurting people not to. I didn’t want to deal with the repercussions of destroying someone that I knew personally even if they did bring it upon themselves.

I was in the awkward position where I was getting too comfortable with myself to write for such a small audience like my Facebook friends yet still knowing I was nowhere near good enough for the rest of the internet. If I tried at that stage, it would have been the pinnacle of arrogance. Being the biggest frog in the well doesn’t mean I can take on the sea. So, I started preparing myself to go to the next step in the profession.

I was determined not to post anything I had written unless it was going on my webpage. And before I did that, I needed to learn how to spell and use a Goddamn semicolon properly; I cut my campaign short to focus on refining my actual writing structure and semantics. Due to additional training, numerous setbacks, and of course the actual preparation of putting up the site I got pushed back about a year and half.”

Anyways

Seven years and some change. From fifteen to twenty-two, all I wrote was almost exclusively Fratire. If I wasn’t writing a short story, I was writing an essay. Long-form was first. I purposely pushed my word count to obnoxious lengths to build my stamina. My freshmen year of college I wrote a new note on Facebook every week along with my daily shitpost or dose of digital terrorism. Backing myself into that kind of corner made immense strides in my overall writing and offensive ability. Not just that but my overall notoriety. I went from being “that black kid in class who knew who how to read” to “that nigga on FB always posting crazy shit”. I didn’t just limit myself to writing either. I started honing my photography, speaking, and editing skills as well. I didn’t want to be Tucker, I wanted to surpass him.

I had followed Tucker very closely up to and beyond this point. I read his entire bibliography backwards. Every book. Every blog post. Every success story and every failure. I was fully invested. Before the blogosphere exploded with a billion influencers, Tucker ran the non-fiction comedy block. Even after he retired from Fratire, he still made a clean pivot to extend his brand into a plethora of other areas that I made sure to keep up in perpetuity. Imagine my elation after Tucker announced he had moved to Texas; and not just any part but what would eventually become my indisputably my favorite city, Austin.

Very recently, I had taken my first trip to San Marcos, and decided it would be where I continued my education. But that education was just an excuse to escape Dallas. My hometown had begun to suffocate me. All my friends would be coming home from their various misadventures in college, all the while I had never left. Straight embarrassing my dawgs. Meanwhile what I saw as arguably the top influence on my writing style moved in essentially down the road. I mean, I literally used to pray for such a shot. Safe to say compared to divine intervention, school was essentially an afterthought. When Destiny calls, you pick up and pack out.

As soon as I got to San Marcos, I started working on my biggest scheme yet. I was lucky enough to have recently read Tucker’s series on How To Find A Mentor, and I thought “who best to teach me the business than the man himself?” Keep in mind friends - I was dumb, but I wasn’t an idiot. Tucker was recently coming off his third book tour, a movie, and an early retirement. Millions of books sold, and 89% of them consisted of him tearing apart people ill-equipped to deal with his genius. If I was going to come at the King, I best not waste my only round.

What could I offer a literal millionaire best seller for free that he did not already have? What value did I bring to the table. Why should I get one meeting with Tucker let alone his time and energy? How could I not only get a hold of him, but interest him enough to invest any of his invaluable time into a virtual unknown?

Short answer? I couldn’t. But that still wouldn’t keep me from trying to wedge my foot in the door. The number one thing I learned from Tucker’s piece was offer something of value for free to your ideal mentor that also showcases your skill set. As of the ripe old age of twenty-two, they were close to nil but still strong enough to cook up a scheme that wasn’t a straight wet dream. I created the (extremely) Unofficial Tucker Max Timeline.

Created may have been a strong word. Tucker obviously lived it, and I outsourced the actual coding to a couple handy friends, but I went through all four of his books and put his stories into chronological order with locations, characters, titles, short summaries, and quotes. It wasn’t difficult per say but it was definitely a diligent process. I treated it as seriously as I had taken the Marines. This wasn’t just a fun lil project, it could potentially become my shortest route to what I set out to accomplish when I was a child. Becoming a recognized, skilled, and trained writer. I even had the follow-up slide show ready to present my goals, tactics, and abilities. Real professional, I know. Truly an embarrassing amount of effort was put into this as evidenced by my additional notes from my archive.

Date: December 15, 2012 at 12:12:16 AM EST

Subject: A bit of background information before we begin.

A bit of background information before we begin.

1. My lifetime goal has to be a professional writer.

2. Everything else I have done is basically to augment that goal.

3. It's exceedingly rare that I say either of the above to others. I have been doing so more often but this is a new development. I think it's shameful when people state their ambitions, then do nothing towards it or have nothing to show for it. I've just recently earned the right to do so.

This stems from my fixation with reading. I never had a babysitter; my mom would just leave me in the library. I read my first Stephen King novel when I was in fourth grade and my first dirty one around the same time. This continues to this day. If I had my way, I'd read a new novel every week. And every time I finish a book, I'm just like "there is a group of people to get paid to write these, and I want to be part of it"

But of course, there's a million factors that go into being a professional writer. Least of all actual writing ability. The probability of success is low, and while it is still achievable, it could take quite a while to be published or even paid to write. And in the meanwhile, bills still need to get paid. Writing isn't a viable first career choice simply because you need money to live your life and support yourself and payment for writing is extremely unreliable and unpredictable.

I've played the "let’s not have money to pay for electricity/ my phone got cut off again until the bill gets paid/ scavenge for change so I can hit dat dollar menu and eat today" game and it’s not fun. Writing was always the end game, but I resigned myself to the fact I'd probably have to get a real job as an adult. The real issue was finding the quickest way to pro status, so I wouldn't waste time on some bullshit career while I could be writing books and whatnot.

I found the means when I was 15. That's when bloggers started hitting their stride, and it became much easier to get an audience and clout as writer on the web. Writers got paid absurd amounts from donations/ ads/sponsors and got real writer jobs all from their site. Within that sphere of Internet articles were writers that wrote about their drunken escapades, how stupid society was, and devoted themselves to shredding people, all while being hilarious. My domain in other words. The first time I read Maddox and Tucker Max, I was just like "People do this? People write this? I can do this. I will do this."

So, I started. There's six years or so of back story in there where I trained and learned my current style, which brings us to the now. I'm an Internet writer, and now comes the part where I just have to start getting noticed and paid. This is doable in 3-4 years, but ain't nobody got time for that. I'm skilled enough now and I really want to avoid using my degree. I need to accelerate the success portion by graduation (a year and a half away). Cue Master plan.

I briefly mentioned Tucker Max. I've kept up with his career and read everything he has written at least twice. He lives in Austin, Tx. He is a millionaire, appreciates talent, and is accessible. He would be an invaluable resource. All I simply have to do is impress the fuck out of him.

My basic goal is to get him to train/pay me as a writer. To that end, I want to spend at least the summer being learned by him and earning his endorsement. His mere name on my resume would be enough to fetch the interest of any writing endeavor that my skill set falls into, and my actual writing would be enough to keep it. Boom attention. Boom money. Boom writer. But first I need to get his attention. Being a writer and having a site is cool and all, but I need to blow his fucking mind before he even reads anything I've written. I will do this in two ways.

1. Create a timeline for his stories for free as a thank you. - pretty simple, but nobody has done it yet. It'll have the same layout as his site, and he can just add it to his page. A fun fan tool and for people new to his writing. And it shows what I'm capable of off the bat.

2. Send him my books to be signed and within the package have 2 bottles of Deep Eddy's sweet tea vodka (his favorite) as a peace offering and a thank you.

The enclosed note will request an audience with him. When we meet, he can confirm I'm not a weirdo, and I can meet one of my favorite authors in person. This will also give me the opportunity to scope him out. I will impress him further and then secure another meeting with him, but this one will be exclusively devoted to selling my potential to him and convincing him that I'm a worthy protege.

At best, this because the catalyst to my success. At worse, I meet Tucker Max, get his attention...maybe a shout out plus followers on Twitter, and an awesome story. I need to go to Austin to check out the physical address of where I'm sending the books to confirm I can send a package.

What do you think?”

Dawg, I think you are either stupid as fuck, too clever by half, or a dangerously upsetting combination of both. I would never in a million years use my age as an excuse for my incompetence but inexperience is a completely different story. And maybe that’s giving myself too much credit. I wasn’t just a rookie; I was a naive one. As evidenced by the reminder of my silly notes.

Date: February 9, 2013 at 2:49:40 AM EST

“Project TMS”

“Project ‘Teach Me The Sword’

Goal: The basic goal is for me to be able to write full time while being paid adequately for it by the end of the summer. Everything that comes after that is much desired but also obtainable via other methods.

Means: Tucker Max is a bestselling author, a multitalented writer with a firm grip of the business, publishing, marketing, and entertainment aspect of the art. He is also the one of the two founding fathers of the genre that I’m currently writing in, “Fratire”. He lives in Austin Texas, roughly thirty minutes away from me.

Tucker has an abundance of resources, a vast network of allies and a wealth of knowledge. I must prove myself as a professional writer and as a resourceful intelligent person that he can form a mutually beneficial relationship with. The absolute best way to accomplish this will be to request a “mentorship” with him.

Before I go into my rationale, it is essential that you don't believe this to be my end-all-fuck-yeah-I'm-famous-bring-the-beer-n-hoes plan. I've always planned to be a writer and trained the last six years to write online. The Tucker tactic is a fairly recent development; I was already planning to become a paid writer without his aid. I have multiple plans to support my grand strategy, and should this fail, I will fall back on those. I'm merely investing so much into it because it is the most direct and efficient manner in which to achieve the end goal.

One of the most important things to understand about this plot is the depth that I lucked out. Tucker moved to Austin in 2009. That made him accessible for in person interaction, but I wanted to meet him as a pro and not a fan. At the age of 19, I was nowhere near ready to approach him as a person let alone as a writer. The thought of apprenticeship had never even crossed my mind. Flash forward to 2012 where several events occur in conjunction to make this a feasible avenue of approach.

• Tucker retires from Fratire

• Tucker launches personal blog with several articles relating to methods to which a person could apprentice within the field that caught their interest

• I moved to San Marcos from Dallas.

• I ‘go pro’ as a writer, design and launch my website.

Individually these factors wouldn’t mean much but since they happened in such a rapid and convenient manner, it created an incredible opportunity that I'd be foolish not to exploit.

If I can obtain this mentorship, it will not only streamline my process of being a full-time paid writer, it will also be a catalyst to multiple business opportunities. It will be a period of intense and drastic growth in a relatively short amount of time. I could hypothetically go further as a writer within six months under Tucker Max than I have in six years on my own.

There are two major and inherent risks within this plan.

1.) Getting his attention

2.) Obtaining an audience with him

I've came up with 5 preliminary steps to minimize this risk while maximizing the chance that he will not only take note of me but take an active interest in my talent off the bat.

5 Preliminary Steps:

Step 1) Be apt enough in ability to approach Tucker.

Step 2) Get Tucker’s attention by offering him something that he can use and offer to it him for free.

Step 3) Secure an in-person audience with Tucker Max.

Step 4) Request two hours of his time in which I will make my case.

Step 5) Give Presentation and blow his fucking mind.

The first step is the simplest for me but the most difficult for the people that often approach him. I am already a writer and have several sites that serve as a testament to my talent. The most important thing these sites display is evidence that I can consistently create well thought out and original content. This already puts me ahead of the legions of fan fucks that want milk from Momma Max's teat.

Step Two was slightly more difficult because I found trouble imagining anything I could give to a man with such a wealth of resources that he couldn't get it from somewhere else. Even if I did give it to him for free, it's extremely likely that someone else could produce the same thing at a much better quality or much more efficiently for a cheap price. Fortunately, I'm smart as shit and crafty as fuck.

I came up with the idea to make Tucker an interactive timeline for his stories. This timeline will cover the stories from all four of his books with the proper dates, a brief synopsis, extended quotes from the tale and a link at the bottom that will either take the reader to the story on his site or to buy the book on Amazon. This timeline will have the exact same format as his site. This gives him the option to merely implement a new timeline feature on his site. The timeline tool would be a unique addition to his sites that his fans would love, help new readers understand him a bit better, and an interesting reference point for his career as a writer.”

Yeeeeeeah, if the title didn’t give it away, I hope the first part of that email did. A few quotes that scream unabashed arrogance.

“It is the most direct and efficient manner in which to achieve the end goal”

“I ‘go pro’ as a writer”

“Give Presentation and blow his fucking mind”

“I am already a writer and have several sites that serve as a testament to my talent”

“I'm smart as shit and crafty as fuck”

More Red Flags than countable and almost too much cringe to comprehend. 2012 was a rough time for all of us. It only gets worse from there:

“My gifts and his curiosity should be enough to be granted an audience. From what I've read, Tucker is generally very approachable, and people have gotten to hang out with him for far less. There's a chance that he'll want nothing to do with me, but it is pretty low. He can recognize strong wills and talent and meeting me wouldn't risk him in the slightest.

Step four is by far the sloppiest of my ENTIRE plan simply because I don't know Tucker in real life, nor do I know anyone else that does know him. Usually, I'd be content to walk into any unknown situation, knowing I can analyze and work my way around it but this isn't any situation. It’s a one and one with Tucker Max who is stronger than me in every way possible.

What more, we don't have any familiarity with one another which will lead to inherent awkward first pains. I'll be wildly aware that he'll be reading me the entire time and may begin to let his presence overwhelm me. I'll be entirely focused on interpreting him or impressing him, and I'll forget to do my own analyzing. I'm going to be fucking terrified until we become comfortable with one another.

However, once I become comfortable with Tucker, it's likely that I'll drop my guard which is an extremely distasteful course of action during the initial meeting. I don’t want to do anything that could potentially be off putting towards him (LMAO).

The best way to counteract this is to bring a very pretty, very intelligent, and very well put together female to accompany me. This gives both of us something else to focus on and works as a conduct for more interactive conversation. If I have good chemistry with the girl and we are all extremely intelligent and entertaining individuals, then the words, jokes, and amusement will flow as abundant, mighty and beautiful as the ancient Euphrates.”

It’s truly tough reading this after a smooth eleven years. Overconfidence is a keystone to my shtick but it is only truly handy if I’m aware of my egotism. To my minimal credit, I ran these emails past at least ten of my closet friends. All of them thought it was a splendid idea, which was an issue in its own right. Even my most brilliant of buddies didn’t clear more than a year or two older than myself. We all thought we were adults at twenty-two, and maybe we were, compared to being literal children, but I don’t think I’d be overreaching to say they had their own blinders to my bullshit as well. Again, 2012 was a rough time for all of us.

My best friend and roommate Taylor had held my hand throughout the entire process. She had always been amongst the most supportive people in my life since we had actually started hanging out post-graduation. I love her deeply to this day, and I almost never implemented any major plan without her input. She’s brilliant, beautiful, sociable, a terrifying tactician in her own right, and perhaps, most importantly, she was the strongest reader aside from a handful of dweebs in my circle. Almost certainly the strongest person I knew in Allen or San Marcos, and the entire reason I had fallen in love with the city to begin with. Her kindness was only matched by her frankness. No other women including all my exes at the time had ever understood me half as well. Combined with her sunny demeanor, she was the easy choice to accompany me on my journey. Perhaps the only choice.

The Tucker Max E-mail

Mr. Max, My name is Quado Chukwujindu and I've created something I believe you will find useful. I've made a timeline of the stories that span your four books as well as additional significant events from your career as a Fratire writer. This timeline gives dates, locations, a brief synopsis of the events and extended quotes from the tale as well as a link at the bottom that will either take the reader to the story on your site or to buy the book on Amazon. In order to give you the option to implement the feature into your site, I've made it with a similar format to your site. This timeline is fully functional, interactive, and completely yours. This tool would be a unique addition to your site that your fans would love, help new readers understand your history better, and act as an interesting reference point for your career. However, this timeline is also roughly three weeks from total completion. You can find the current version with the first fifteen stories on the link provided. I'm emailing you while it's an unfinished product because I'd like some of your input before proceeding further. - Some of these stories happened within the same month or timeframe and I couldn't deduce what order they came in, so I put them in the order in which they were presented. If you could clarify, it'd greatly improve the overall accuracy. -The location was unclear in many of the text, and if you can recall where it took place, rectifying them becomes a simple matter. - Is the overall design of the timeline acceptable or would you like me to change something? Is this something you’d want to implement it onto your site, or should I purchase a domain name and transfer it to you? - I've attached two documents to this email. One is the raw data from the four books with dates/locations/ synopsis/ quotes. If there are any changes you’d like me to make before entering it into the Timeline, I will do so. Also attached are the icons for what I believed to be the most significant events in your fratire career. If you’d like me to change, add, or remove any of them, this is also easily accomplished. If you could assist me in answering these questions, it'd ensure that you receive the best version possible, tailored to your liking.

By now there's a strong probability the thought "Who is this guy, why is he doing this, and what is the catch?" may have crossed your mind. Pardon my rudeness, and allow me to give a proper introduction. I already told you my name earlier, but what I didn't mention was that I write for my site under the pen name "The Negro Hero". I launched my site in November of 2012, but it was a goal I had been working towards since early 2006. Not only have I been a fan of your work since then, but I've followed your career with an avid interest the past six years. Not only did you pave the way for the genre my writing currently falls under, but you've been an invaluable resource of knowledge and a large inspiration to me over the years. I've seen you as sort of a mentor. As such, I wanted to give you a tangible token of my gratitude that you'd find useful and I wanted to do it as a fellow professional rather than a mere fan. There is no catch to the timeline. However, I do have an additional proposal to offer you. Whether or not you accept, of course has no bearing on the timeline whatsoever. Last semester I moved to San Marcos to finish up my last two years of school at Texas State University. This puts me within a 30-45 minute range of your current city. Recently I mailed a package with your trilogy of books to your P.O. Box address to be signed. If at all possible, I'd like to pick up these books in person, and if you are feeling especially generous, perhaps we can do this over dinner. This dinner will serve multiple purposes. It can double as a business meeting where we discuss the particulars of the timeline in addition to what you'd like me to change or add. It'd also save you the trouble of mailing back my books while allowing me an in person audience with the man whose taught me so much as a writer over the years. This dinner of course would be completely on my dime, not at all exclusive to us, and if you'd rather have a home meal and don't mind hosting, I'm more than willing to bring the ingredients provided you understand the majority of the cooking will be done by you as I am undoubtedly the lesser chef. If you have qualms about letting a virtual stranger into your home, I understand, just name the restaurant, your guests, and I will make the reservations. Regardless of whether or not you accept my invite, I'd like to thank you for your time. I hope to hear back from you soon. (If I don't receive a reply with a week, I'll likely use other less professional manners to achieve contact with you. Please excuse my intrusiveness in advance.) You can reach me by email

Or by phone

Regards, Quado "The Hero" Chukwujindu

Sheesh, what an unmitigated dumb fuck. I could point out about a billion things that I did wrong, from the length of the email to the childish assumptions, and again the sheer arrogance of the entire endeavor. But the absolute wildest part about my slimy little scheme?

It worked.

Tucker emailed me less than a week later.

[email protected]

Feb 19, 2013

“First off, I applaud your effort in doing this. For real, that is awesome, and its obvious you have skill, not just motivation.

Second--and much less important--it's a terrible idea. No one really cares about the timeline of the stories. Thats never occurred to me, nor has anyone asked for it.

You know what would have been both awesome AND useful? A series of pictures type things that have awesome and hilarious quotes, like ecards or shit like that.

That being said, I'm always down to meet someone who is both motivated AND skilled. There aren't a lot of those people around. When are you free?

“I’m always down to meet someone who is both motivated AND skilled”

I couldn’t believe it. But of course, I could. My six years of training wasn’t just for show. I had been actively dedicating 100% of my one brain cell to this exact outcome. All the parties. All the notes. All the jokes. All the continuous insults, maneuvers, and executions had brought me to this point. It wasn’t even probability, it was planning. The hardest part was proximity, and again we had solved that quite handily through either sheer luck or the literal Lord. Yes, I knew I was nowhere at that level yet, but I still had a steady pride in my ability. Ability that had thus gotten me through both the best and the direst of circumstances. And of course, with that pride came an ego. Dumbass or not, the difficult part was over. I’d already had his attention. Now what I needed was his interest. Which would be easy as I was interesting. Indeed, above the Heavens and beneath the Earth, I alone was the honored one. Tucker Max had noticed me.

Careful what you wish for, kid.

“Everyone Has A Plan Until They Get Punched In The Face”

Tucker: “What do you want to write?”

Me: *Blank Stare*

“Huh”

I had arrived at Jo’s Coffee Shop and my ultimate goal. I was sitting at the same table as Tucker Max. We exchanged pleasantries and began our conversation. I’d be lying if I said I remembered how our conversation started but I definitely remember how it ended. And it started with that one singular, simple question.

“What do you want to write?”

I froze.

No. I didn’t just freeze. I blanked completely. Believe it or not in my entire existence, nobody had ever asked me that. At least outright. At that stage, people did not take me seriously when I spoke of writing. Any more than those who aspire to be professional athletes, musicians, or comedians. It’s insane because up until that point I had almost never been forthright with people when they asked me that question.

At 33 I am confident at not only defining myself, my abilities, and my style but the same could be said for my ability to break down others. Eleven years ago was a different tale. I was not only insecure about pursuing an artistic profession but petrified at the thought of admitting it to others. Now less than two feet in front of me sat perhaps the one person who’d not only understand and encourage what I was trying to accomplish but facilitate the process in a manner other new, emerging, amateur, aspiring authors would quite happily murder for. And I fucking froze.

Talking to Tucker in 2013 was like being caught in a cage with a tiger. I thought living in Allen had taught me apex predation but even the strongest of Hunters had ill prepared me for the beast that I brought upon myself. Again, I need to reiterate this was over a decade ago. Tucker was still unmarried, only four years into therapy, and a few hundred failures from the man he is today. Yes, he had retired from being an active asshole but that did not stop him from being an animal like opponent.

I don’t mean that as an insult either. To this day, I remember his rhythm. Truly feline instinct, reflex, and implementation. His casual demeanor did little to belay his aura of complete control and conversational dominance. He was actually quite kind in comparison to his chronicles. He wasn’t particularly vicious…but the experience was. Swear it was like a streamer sparring with a samurai. Just an endless rain of targeted blows meant to batter, bruise, and of course breakdown. I had stepped into his domain, and he had dissected me with a single statement.

“Careful what you wish for, kid”

“Have you ever been on Cracked.com?” I asked cautiously.

He laughed scornfully.

“I don’t read Cracked”

If anything cracked at this point, it was my soul. Peeled apart as easily an onion.

“I could write about doing security.” I slowly countered through a mouth full of cotton.

Tucker notably softened at this point

Tucker: “Have you ever read (to my deep shame, I cannot recall the author)”

I had not. Tucker talked me through a few of his tales and recommended the novels if that was the route I wanted to take. I made the mistake of perking up.

“I want to write fiction.”

His demeanor instantly darkened.

Tucker: “THEN WHY DON’T YOU WRITE FICTION?”

I did not answer. I did not have a real answer. The real answer is that again despite my bibliography consisting almost of nothing BUT fiction at this point I still found myself struggling to stray from the path I had set upon at sixteen. The real answer is that I STILL can’t write fiction unless I was in a group, or it was a comedy. But at this point I was already drowning in shame and did not want to sink deeper. I was beginning to feel like the fool I had proven myself to be.

Even Taylor’s arrival had done nothing to serve as a buffer between me and the bottomless well. He again was completely cordial to her but didn’t even glance at her otherwise. Taylor being a wise Queen sat wordlessly and absorbed each of his points rapt with attention as her equal was neutralized with an almost comical ease.

Save me white woman

But there was no saving me. I had fucked up. Majorly. I thought I was time-skip status, when in reality had just (literally) left my first island. He hadn’t insulted me once, scarcely had raised his voice, and the swearing was nonexistent. Yet I couldn’t get past his basic stances. Performance anxiety played a part but in reality, I had played myself. Still, I tried to pivot. To build a bridge, I brought up Ryan Holiday and his recent work “Trust Me I’m Lying” to try and tread back to common ground.

“It’s awesome that he secured that $500,00 advance”

This time he straight cackled.

I blushed and sank deeper into disgrace than I thought was possible. The man had literally written the book on Fake News (before it was cool) and I had still fallen for the obvious bait. No, this was not going great. There was no joking. No inappropriate comments. Not a giggle in sight. Just the joke sitting in front of him.

Tucker: “What do you want to do man? You have clearly some coding skill, why don’t you capitalize on that”

“Well, I actually got my friends to…”

Tucker: “HOLY SHIT, YOU DIDN’T EVEN MAKE THE TIMELINE”

Crushed. Cleaved. Utterly Dismantled. The sickening part is that I had considered that the coding may have specifically been what he was interested in and yet I neglected to share that aspect. I struggled to my feet and attempted to salvage myself from the shame.

“I could still work on those E-cards for you”

A look of surprise and contempt.

Tucker: “You don’t work for me” he said savagely

A punch straight to what remained of my gut.

Tucker visibly relaxed and straightened himself.

Tucker: “If you want to go the comedy route, you gotta understand it’s very complicated and hard to pull off. There’s no pretending. You Can’t Fake Funny”

You Can’t Fake Funny. At that my ego bristled. For the first time in forty minutes, I felt a vestige of the actual willpower that had brought me there to begin with. I wasn’t faking it. I had spent a third of my life making people laugh and I had the receipts & reputation to show for it. I wasn’t a phony. A frog facing a fog beast perhaps but I had never been fake. I was as serious as a stroke. I threw the only blow I had in exasperation.

“Actually, I write a ton dude, that’s why I set up my own site.”

Tucker: Here let me see your page

Wordlessly, I pulled up my site.

Here’s where it got scary. He read through my “strongest” material in maybe a minute flat. I wasn’t even alarmed at the lack of response. Maybe disheartened but not alarmed. The speed, however, the speed terrified me. It was maybe the second or third time in my life that someone was a faster reader than me (Taylor being one of them), and definitely the first I had been dwarfed so totally. That’s when I knew I was fucking washed.

“I Lost”

At this point another familiar face appeared. Nils Parker. Tucker’s editor and partner in crime. I had done my dues on his work and was duly impressed. My entire body was dull at this point, but I still took the point to stammer a muted hello. Tucker took the opportunity. There was nothing left to discuss. He stood with my shattered pride beneath him.

Tucker: “Wellllll, we gotta get out of here”

“Wait”

I had a million things to say. Nothing of note came to mind. Except one resolution.

“Can I get a picture” I asked ashamed quietly.

Tucker stared at me with a distinct disgust and said with absolute annoyance.

“Sure”

Pain

Whelp! Time to go home and nap.

When I got up my roommates asked me how it went.

And I felt…. relieved. Resolved for sure. Of course, it was never going to be that easy. Plan B it was.

“Fine, I’ll do it myself.”

I don’t want to bore y’all more than I already have (that comes later) but here’s the basic jist.

I wrote a very long piece detailing my goals, my journey, and my abilities.

I researched, read, and repetitioned myself into oblivion.

I looked into his Network and discovered his tribe.

I found one of my own.

I had another four years of dedicated practice with performance, photography, prose, and physical activities.

I worked my little booty off in the hospitality industry learning security, serving, supervision, and Startending.

I lost my site but signed up for six separate apps.

I tripled down on training. Endlessly in any avenue that would present itself.

I grasped all my basic abilities at twenty six.

I quit actively writing for six years and semi-retired to focus on capitalism, being hot, and finding a partner.

I found her.

I’m back on my bullshit.

Like I said, it’s been eleven years since that fateful coffee, and so much has changed since for better or worse, internally and externally. But I still love the game as much as I did when I was sixteen. And I’m still resolved to get paid from writing. But I want to do it the right way. And I learned that the journey to professionalism was clearly more important than destination.

I’m still an amateur in the sense that I have to make a dime for anything I’ve ever written. But that is the least of my concerns at this point. I know I can and more importantly that I will. If my Tucker talk taught me one thing, it’s preparation over destination. I can and I will get into the exact mechanics of my maturing but that’s a premium and y’all might have to pay a penny for that.

I hold absolutely nothing against Mr. Max. If anything I hold him in the highest of regards. I’m not the only one that did some serious evolving. Most of the people that remember him from the peak of his popularity in the fratire sphere, and little else. He actually and obviously still actively posts on his personal site. I could go eons into the lore but again, I don’t want to bore y’all. He tells his tales much more efficiently than I ever could. Out of the plethora of prominent figures from his era, he is among the only that retains any sort of relevance and the growth he’s made is absolutely astounding. I still look up to him as a big brother and look forward to seeing him in person again one day to thank him profusely for the free knowledge, and the reality check I promptly cashed.

Without meeting Tucker Max, I still would have been unaware of my idiocy. He was the first beef gate (“you can go wherever you want…but if you try to go out of order, the game will kill you”) I had ever encountered and I’m glad I did so early in my journey. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still a dumbass but I’m a diligent one. And skilled, nonetheless. The training continues, and if anything, I’m just regaining my rhythm. But I promise one thing. I’m never going to quit writing again. And I’m going to prove I’m a professional before I claim it. I owe it to myself, my audience, and of course my Mentor.

#tucker max

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