#he’s a little cuckoo for coco puffs

[boykisserwoah]

I forgot to put this here my bad !!!

@weirdohno credit for jevil design and background!! Hai bromie :3

Small human Spamvil angst comic :3

#spamton #spamvil #jevil #deltarune #deltarune au #my art #spamton g spamton #jevil Deltarune #gay #lmfao #angst with a happy ending #light angst #he’s a little cuckoo for coco puffs #hai crow :3

[lcbcshcart]

@soncfthewitch BEGGED for a small starter with Kenji.

"You're not the first entity that comes up to me and starts questioning their existence." Nudging at Toby's shoulder with his elbow. "I do it all the time. People think I'm a little cuckoo for coco puffs." A Kitsuné that questions his mere existence is an odd for people but Kenji came to terms with it centuries ago. A Kitsune spirit that has roamed the earth for as long as he can remember and has come across a few gods, Demi-gods, and other supernatural creatures that all question life but, later come to terms with and without his help. Kenji gives the building blocks to help pave a path to their roles in the universe. "So, what's the little fighter have for me? Seeing as how you wanna, oh, I don't know? Make yourself better? Confused on something? Or just looking to get some answers from a old spirit like me?"

#Muse: Kenji #V: Default #soncfthewitch

[quitealotofsodapop]

[Macaque still feels sympathy for his little parasite. .. - but def imposes a restraining order, cus if he sees the Super-Fan around his husband or kids again he will kill them without hesistation.]

Not sure if it brings the mood up or down or sideways - but it is the case that stalkers don't always obey the restraining order. Since the order does tell the other party the places they can't go (i.e., schools, homes and workplaces), some used it as places to stake out. I recall reading one time it ended up with the judge just telling the offender not to go anywhere in a whole state that the victim moved to, because of how they were being harassed.

Just saying that, this is a plot that might seem like resolved long ago, gets a second wind years later - now out, meaner and more obsessed (after all, Mac did say only about nearing the Husband and Kids - not hard to imagine somebody who's cuckoo for coco-puffs to would reconstrue that to mean that the husband and kids are an obstacle).

sequel post to this prompt about Macaque getting a stalker fan.

Oof. Almost like a "Buddy turning into Syndrome" situation.

Just realised that LMK has a lack of well... human threats.

Even in Jttw, there was the threat of jealous monks, bandits, unreasonable kings, etc...

But the scariest human threat we see in LMK is the Speedy Panda delivery drivers.

A human person geniunely obsessed with someone powerful like Macaque is a legit interesting concept for a LMK villain/threat. No powers, no magic origins; just a disturbed person who won't take no.

#stalking tw #the monkey king and the infant #the monkey king and the infant au #liu er mihou #six eared macaque #lmk shadowpeach au #shadowpeach

[you-cant-fuck-megaman]

I’m aware they aren’t Megaman but seeing as the two fandoms tend to buddy together I have made this to save you the trouble…

No.

You can’t fuck the Metarchy, You can’t fuck (at least what’s left of) the Ecumene Council.

You ask any of the contender class ancillias for poon and they’ll look at you like you lost your gottdamn marbles. That and the youngest is around 7-8 BILLION years old. It’d be like a toodler asking to bang for these three. Like a weird sense of interspecies pedophilia. That and Mendicant is to busy trying to atone for nearly killing everything and everyone. Offensive is to busy playing militant law enforcement. And all Custodian wants to do is read his books in peace. You can’t fuck them.

What about the monitors?! And I have heard your impassioned cries. The answer is still a resounding NO. Firstly they’re orbs, spherical, ball shaped. So unless you wanna fuck a volleyball with laser eyes meant to disintegrate organic matter. Then don’t fuck em… that and most of them are so lonely they’ve gone cuckoo for coco puffs and see you as obsolete and will attempt to kill you. A good chuck of them are actually disgusted by biological life, and that includes you.

What about 343-?…

NO!!

Leave poor Chakas (Guilty Spark) alone!!! He lost everyone he’s ever loved either by the Halo event or time itself! He lost his humanity to save it and the galaxy from an interstellar plague!! Just let the poor man retire from the intergalactic space drama he got sucked into.

No!

You can’t fuck the forerunner A.I’s from Halo!!

Just like you can’t fuck Megaman!!

(Hope you enjoy this silly little post for an unusually come crossover contender for the Megaman fandom. Keep up the amazing content you brilliant S.O.B)

magnificent. thank you very much! this was a treat to read.

i'm unfamiliar with Halo (tho i liked Marathon), but a couple of my friends have been writing up similar "You Can't Fuck" posts and taking it as an opportunity to gush about characters they love. which honestly i think is a net benefit. obv i love Megaman, but there's a lot of good franchises out there that could use people writing long dumps about their preferred characters.

my little sister has been tempted to make a "You Can't Fuck Pokémon" sideblog and honestly i wish her lucifer's blessing because that is ground god will not tread

#halo #343 Guilty Spark #Mendicant Bias #pokemon #pokémon #inapplicable #ask #stitchieau-the-actual-one

[thelostgetfound-artemis]

golfart have bingyuan energy.

I don't usually compare characters across media much but Binghe and Golf are both that rare combination of walking red flag you somehow feel a bit conned into rooting for because he's the main character.

It's also uncommon to have a very masculine character who could (and did) commit murder but then easily cry to get their way ten minutes later.

• Openly confessing no one has stayed in relationship with him longer than a week and he has no idea why (it's cause you're cuckoo for coco puffs my man).

• Almost instantly falling in love with someone just because they're kind to him and give him a warm smile.

• Falling into the caretaker role and expecting to be thanked for it (even though he's the sole reason there's a need for caretaking in the first place).

I could go on. There's a lot of little nuances where they have similarities but the scene that stood out in particular is this:

The Facts

The Manipulation:

Art having to pause his own breakdown because Golf turns on the water works for sympathy points (if you can't reason with your captive/bf out cry him):

Mission: Success

Golf (basically) keeping Art captive, then manipulating Art via crying and guilt tripping to the point Art ends up apologizing for trying to escape?

He and Luo Binghe could write a manual.

#there's obviously differences in their characters sure but #this is the closest I've seen to this kind of character in a live action and NOT the 'bad guy' #i also said bingyuan specifically because #they don't have that power dynamic of the softer character being a teacher #till the world ends #svsss #scum villain's self saving system #scumbag system #luo Binghe #ttwetheseries #golfart #bingyuan #art_oh

[abysslll]

listening to the dazai playlist! forgor if u sent link or not n too lazy to check so im just hoping the "dazai osamu vibes" one is the right one

idk whats been saying in the first song but wooo! woooooo!!!!! adventure!!!!!!!

the GUILT this man has is violent. i am choking on it. but like guilt in a very numb way if that makes sense? hes done horrible things and hes just fucken desensitized by it at this point that he cant even bring himself to feel bad about it, but some part of him still hurts.

anger issues he explodes constantly. very slow work up before it just goes bOOM

revenge. hunting down the people who hurt him

i already know this mfer does not wanna live but ive still gotta mention violently suicidal and self destructive. idk if ive asked but do we know why he has so many bandages?? constantly flipping between killing himself and fucking over life and living

very fast speeding connections in which he gets attached and gets hurt? when he does really connect to someone they mean a lot to him. keeps promises like hell and fuck. he has strong bpd vibes.

religious trauma?

sommmeeeeeetimes a little cuckoo crazy coco puffs. like really insane and violent and overall he turns into someone you dont want to be around. he can disconnect from everything around him easily so at that point, he doesnt care what happens

sexy

boogeying these tunes are so good and i feel like there should be a lot more pure screaming in this playlist like dazai probably listens to screams of anguish while falling asleep

very sneaky scary little man i think he would like guns and should not be trusted around weapons of any time. very smart also.

GET MENTAL HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

walks around in life just really angry and resentful towards everything idk why hes still alive but maybe spite or just pure hate towards everything he cant even bring himself to really die. feels very unloveable and alien (okay fine yes i did read no longer human by the real osamu dazai)

mfer is always wearing a damn mask to please people!!!!!! stop people pleasing!!!!! be normal!!!!! or actually dont i think neither would be very good

his trauma made him angry and mean and unpleasant to be around instead of soft and caring and strong and hes so so angry about that and like. idk what his trauma is but its giving Why Would You Do That To A Kid vibe

fucked up morality. good or bad? who knows!

suuuuuuiiiiiccccciiiidaaaaallll i see you im so tired and last words of a shooting star. feels like all would be best without him around but doesnt really wanna hurt the people he cares about too much (though he wont let himself admit this)

AUHGOAUHGOAUGHAOUGHAOGUHAOGUHUAHGIAUGOUAHGO

reading through this grinning and laughing like a madman YOU ARE SO RIGHT FOR THE MAJORITY OF THESE OPINIONS!!!! i am going to go through and give way too detailed responses to most of this bc i am very normal here we go

numb guilt is SO TRUE for him i don't have a better word to describe his views like there's this scene where he's talking to kyouka and she tells him she can't live anymore because she's killed 35 people and he looks so sad when he says "so what? what's a mere 35 people?" bc hes killed HUNDREDS and he doesn't even really feel bad for it while this girl is in despair from a (relative to him) small amount

no anger issues actually but you've made me REALLY want to see an angry dazai now so i'm gonna have to write that revenge fic 😭

it is not said why he has bandages but there are two major theories in the fandom, one is that he self harms and doesn't want other people to see and the other is that he's actually the Book which is hard to explain concisely but is a reality-altering book that everyone in the series is trying to find. whatever is written in it will become reality so it's a theory that all the writing is on his skin and he's just kinda hiding in plain sight! nobody knows for sure tho

HE DOES HAVE BPD VIBES

he totally does switch personalities in canon, like most of the time he's all cheerful and woo happy go lucky eyehey and then whenever he's facing off against the villains or doing something a lil morally wrong he just completely shuts off any kindness he might have mustered it's fun to see but also yeah. Scarey

he absolutely would just listen to straight up screaming you are so right

crying at sneaky scary little man that is the best description of him i have ever heard and i am going to steal it for dialogue in the fic i'm writing rn. he should NOT be trusted around weapons but for some reason he's like the only guy in the detective agency who has a gun

i think thr people pleasing is better than his true self lmao 😭 idk if he even has a true self at this point tho </3

i almost wish we knew what his trauma was in canon but i prefer it being a mystery bc 1) i quite honestly don't think they could write whatever it was without making it seem underwhelming for his character bc tragic anime backstories are So common and he's so much more fucked up than your average anime character and 2) people write the most horrific fics about their versions of his backstory and i love reading them sm. i want to read them forever

thank you for listening !!!! hope u enjoyed and i will get to peyton's playlist tomorrow if i have time :DD <333

#bat <3 #endless asks #my playlists #<- i THINK that's my tag for this #idk #bsd tag

[wellthatwasaletdown]

I know this has been said many many times already but I had to get it off my chest after making the mistake of reading some Harry blogs. I shouldn’t be surprised by how Harry’s fans will turn themselves inside out to make sure their precious baby clown remains blameless and not held accountable for any of his actions. They’ve turned their hate rage against Jason. They’re absolutely convinced he’s using Harry to increase his profile. But haha joke’s on Jason for masterminding this with Olivia because it’s Jason’s image that’s now tarnished. Which, what in the fucking holy hell are these people smoking???!!! It means nothing to them that Jason is quick to shut down whatever lie du jour Olivia’s putting out or that he would put his children first even if it means he has to put up with Olivia’s machinations. They’re so used to Harry acting solely for his own benefit, it confuses them that Jason puts his children’s interests above his own. They insist it’s all part of Jason’s grand plan to look like a fool and get cheated on so he can ride Harry’s coattails and use him to catapult to fame because no one knew Jason before Harry. Their proof is that now everyone is talking about him and Ted Lasso. And that’s all thanks to Harry. Again What. The. Ever. Loving. Fuck. They’re convinced Jason is targeting Harry’s fans for reasons known only to them. I don’t know why they think Jason cares about them. It’s not like he’s looking to sell them warped vinyls or dollar store gloves at extortionate prices. Then again, Harry doesn’t care about them either so 🤷‍♀️ Olivia is hell bent on promoting herself as Harry Style’s girlfriend and determined to be tone deaf to criticism, so they desperately need to pin the blame on Jason. Never Harry, the poor wee baby who has the weight of the world on his shoulders because he gets everything handed to him on a silver platter. The trauma he must be experiencing, lol. His fans are just so fucking delusional thinking the world revolves around Harry. They’ve gone off the deep end because HO continues to exists and they really really need it to end asap. I dislike Olivia (pimple cream entrepreneur, future detox poop tea vendor, MeToo and Times up violator, Weinstein BFF, liar, stalker, cheater, professional director, Instagram influencer, dumb bitch in general), as much as the next person, but the ending his fans truly deserve is the one where she sticks around and becomes the stuff of their nightmares - Mrs. Harry Styles with baby, Stylo, in tow. Yeah, I know this relationship was probably over the moment Harry realized it didn’t get him the press he wanted and possibly when Olivia revealed herself to be a little bit cuckoo for coco puffs, but hey, a person can dream. Olivia, there are so many reasons to hate you. I hate Harry too, so so much. I kinda think you’re perfect for each other, but girl, you’re nuts and he’s going to end up clowning you. The HO love story you were trying to sell as a fairy tale is a shit show car crash and dumpster fire. I gotta say though, there are a lot of trashy shows around, but of all the trash, you and Harry are top of the list. Parting words: I like to torture myself sometimes so I watched Olivia’s True Botanicals routine on YouTube. The whole thing is an ad. It’s not that old so you’d think her acting has improved. She’s acting “real” and by real, I mean fake and entry level high school drama club. There was a reason why, even with her bff Harvey Weinstein trying to make her happen for years, she could never crack the A list. She’s got no talent as an actress. Her talents lie in self promotion and having zero shame. Lol, I forgot for a second there that I was describing Olivia and not Harry.

#harry styles #olivia wilde #anonymous #submission

[imaginedigimon]

If the Adventure kids and their digimon's ever became evil/dark Digidestined, what will be your headcanons on the kids personalities or evolution lines and stuff like that?

Ah, I should’ve seen this coming.

The evil DigiDestined question.

Adventure Kids... BUT EVIL

Tai [Taichi]

This is where the canon comes in handy (and makes my job easier), because at the very least, we know we’d see SkullGreymon a heckuva lot more. While SkullGreymon is kind of the embodiment of the not good things in the Digital World, Tai as an evil kid would be... hilarious? Like think of any cartoon villain (Gargamel from The Smurfs and Robbie Rotten from LazyTown come to mind), and that’s Tai.

And then he’d end up taking over the world because no one took him seriously. Not that we have to worry, he just wanted to be able to sleep longer and eat a lot.

Matt [Yamato]

Now Matt... Matt would be that villain that causes entire factions of the fandom to scream “IF HE’S EVIL WHY IS HE SO HOT”

He’d also be the type of sympathetic villain that you can’t help but think has a point and then you start to wonder about the implications of your own moral code if you sorta see what the VILLAIN is getting at. And then you realize he’s cuckoo for Coco Puffs cuz he’s going way too far and oh no, we need to stop his ass.

Gabumon’s evolution chain would probably go the Dobermon route thank you Wikimon for being a pal since, you know. Big scary dog. He just wants cuddles tho

Sora

Honestly, why hasn’t Sora turned evil yet in the Adventure continuity? Tai and Matt never listen to her and insist on being her canon love interests xD I love them dearly, but seriously---

In all seriousness, Sora probably takes the “every human is garbage” sort of route were she evil. Just generally done(tm) with everyone’s bullshit and is basically gonna raze the world to the ground and start anew. Not a TERRIBLE idea, but could we NOT use Digimon to do it----

Most likely, Biyomon takes the Cockatrimon route. What better way to take down all humans then freeze them like Medusa?

Izzy [Koushiro]

He was already a genius, but as an evil genius, he’d be TERRIFYING. Like there would seriously be no hope of stopping him unless, like...Mimi? I guess? But anyway, he would definitely succeed in taking over the world. And why did he do it? Because he can (and because kids bullied him as a child for being different). Kinda like Moriarty taken to a super extreme level I guess.

*shudders*

Tentomon in this instance would warp to Tyrant Kabuterimon, which I definitely didn’t decide because of the “tyrant” in the name.

Mimi

Like Matt, Mimi would give the “oh no she’s hot” vibes to the fandom. She’d be a lot like Lust from FMA and I don’t know how to feel about that. She just wants to be queen, is that so bad? Reminds me a bit of Queen Levana from The Lunar Chronicles to be honest. Scary stuff. Probably relies on her looks to trick the “heroes” into thinking she’s harmless and then sends Palmon after ‘em. Those poor heroes.

Palmon goes the Sunflowmon route here, and I swear I’m not just saying this because Sunflowmon always freaked me out a little. I mean, come on--A FLOATING SUNFLOWER WITH A FACE AND TAIL THING

Joe [Jou/Jyou]

He’s got the glasses and the dark hair if he was evil he’d basically be a darker version of Kyoya from Ouran High School Host Club. Funny cracks aside, Joe would possibly become a villain because no one ever took him seriously, and his inferiority complex basically whooshed out of control and warped him a bit. Happens to the best of us, am I right? Yeah... and he could probably get pretty far with his schemes, too. Man studied hard for a reason.

Gomamon goes Gesomon route. Because what else screams “EVIL” but squid tentacles coming out of nowhere to restrain you while the villain gives his monologue?

T.K. [Takeru]

Wasn’t... wasn’t T.K. already evil? Or was that just me?

T.K. went villainous for one of two reasons: something happened to Matt, or he started hating the world because of being separated from Matt. If, say, he didn’t have the privilege of seeing his brother like he did in Adventure, he might decide the world doesn’t really deserve to exist anymore because it dared keep him away from Matt. Scary stuff. Let’s pretend it was the first option. Revenge is a dish best served with a cute face.

Oh... oh, this is interesting. According to Wikimon, Patamon can evolve to Devimon.

Now wouldn’t that be just perfect?

I hate this, I hate this so much

Kari [Hikari]

Hm. Kari’s hard, because of the Crest of Light and all, but she’d probably go evil for similar reasons to T.K. Someone messed with Tai, and that wasn’t cool. She’d probably have more of a mental breakdown about it that would result in some waaaaaay bad cruelty, and it would be like the Digimon Emperor ratcheted up about five notches. Honestly? Horrifying stuff.

Well APPARENTLY Ophanimon is a dark Digivolution that’s bullshit but WHATEVER but (and I’m using Gatomon here because old habits die hard) for shits and giggles, let’s say we get Lady Devimon. Because it’s not a party unless you hate irony at least once a day.

All at Once

Now if ALL of the Adventure kids were to turn evil at once, chaos would ensue. However, I’d like to think they’d at LEAST be the type of villains to stick by each other...hopefully. They would most likely collectively turn evil if the human world continued treating Digimon like creatures that should be stopped/eradicated or are too dangerous to coexist with. Hard to say what the order of their “fall” would be, but eventually all of them would be a little in too deep to get out...

--------

....I’m going to end up writing fics about this, aren’t I

#digimon headcanons #swiftly-sweetheart #adventure kids #digimon adventure #oh man i wanna write a fic based on these so bad #dammit #why did i do this to myself #but these were so INTERESTING

[rpmemesbyarat]

Starter quotes from "What The Fuck Is Wrong With You"on Radio Dead Air

This must be how baby kangaroos feel when they’re on heroin!

Did you draw the penis?

Yeah, you know what, I’m fucking nuts, I’ll be up front

I would love to see this man in a death match with Sonny the Coco Puffs Cuckoo

Why is it the people who have kids are always the ones who shouldn’t have kids?

Canada, you owe us an apology

You are not a pimp, motherfucker

They get a little pissed when you set shit on fire. I know this from experience, don’t ask me how.

The stolen vagina is still on the lam

He’s created a very inexpensive weapon of mass destruction

Flaming bees!

If that’s what comes up when you play Truth or Dare, you need new friends

I don’t want to drink people

Oh my god, it’s wooden box and people are doing weird things with it!

We don’t do things with things anymore

Why are strange people washing me?

That dog was probably confused as hell

Ok, we’ve got lesbians

They do burglaries correctly, and they don’t burgle houses with a lion

You’re playing tug of war with an eel for possession of your dick

The rectal eels jokes are officially dead. It’s urethra eels now!

If you’re a girl, and you just act contrite and scared, they’ll let you go

Cops are not allowed to expose their genitals when trying to sting hookers

These are the most FABULOUS CRIMINALS EVER!

Butt pads?

Did she and the duck have some sort of argument?

You are going to be sold for a pack of cigarettes in record time

I threw a duck!

Don’t throw ducks

I hope that dog bites her ankles real hard! A buncha times! Forever!

Dolphins kinda are the douchebags of the sea

I take no responsbility for the actions of a dolphin-fucker

Don’t encourage dolphin-fuckers!

Being pendantic’s what the Internet’s all about

They’re not gonna raise awareness, they’re gonna raise serial killers!

I think their intention is to just ruin masturbation for everyone

Let’s just poke at the subconscious

There’s always that one kid when you’re growing up that tries to jump off the fucking roof

You can tell the hippo. The hippo does not judge.

All of a sudden, you’ve got Roman candle wars and half the neighborhood’s on fire

You’re about as far from being the Lord Jesus Christ as a person can be without actually being Charles Manson

If you’re using the Bible as a weapon, you have missed the point

That’s five more years in purgatory for you!

Come get me, Thailand!

I don’t even feel bad that he probably got stabbed in the dick four hundred times

Those birds, in a previous life, one of them was Hitler

Look, I am trying to make sense of why a man would put birds in his junk

Don’t get high and watch The Village

That just seems unnecessarily elaborate; like can’t you just put antifreeze in her coffee like everybody else?

I don’t wish them dead. I might wish them stabbed in the dick by angry hummingbirds.

Don’t mix your porn and your dead rabbits

Who steals underwear with a getaway driver?

If at first you don’t succeed—crime, crime again!

Elaborate on the weird

That’d probably be a fetish

You cannot sit in my backyard and masturbate

Our society is based on lies!

I have never heard of dignity, what is this word?

Maybe they just sucked it into another universe!

When I started taking my clothes off, a man said you can’t do that in here, so I glued myself to his desk

Phase Three is disability, because you’ve torn your own ass off

We should totally fucking steal the Brooklyn Bridge while we’re in New York

Be a good nerd, that’s all we ask

Did you rob convenience stores as a group?

I’m very sorry I streaked your wedding

You want the Black Death coffee

Why would cooking your poo make it turn into gold?

Fuck that leprechaun!

This is all kinds of douche

Should I be calling the TSA or should I just be calling the Exorcist?

They let him stay naked!

Your ability to express yourself ends when it goes in my eye

Can I get some Thousand Island for that word salad?

Someone thought this was a good idea

This is totally my wheelhouse-- Drunk and naked

Did you miss the last fucking decade?

Desperate for vagina, plastic or otherwise

It is the cutting edge in jerking-off machines

Everyone knows you can’t wear naked after Labor Day

Zombies need love too

Have an oral agreement before you start the oral sex

Basically, we have a gang of drag queens

#rp meme #rp memes #rp starters #roleplay memes #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #wtfiwwy #what the fuck is wrong with you

[fereality-indy]

Parent Teacher Conference

This story came about because of a 'Who In The Couple Would Be' questionaire on Tumblr. This question was 'Who’s the teacher and who’s the single parent?'

------------------------------------

If you had told me at the beginning of the school year that it would have turned out like this I would have told you that you were crazy.

Emma was starting kindergarten and  there was a meet and greet for the parents and the teachers. I went ahead and showed up since Miss Lincoln, who had taught my brothers and I (heck, maybe even our dad), retired two years ago and this was only her replacements second year on the job. So as a responsible parent I went to check him out, I wasn’t gonna leave my lil princess in the hands of a stranger.

She is the best thing to happen to me. A surprise (I don’t see how anyone could call their bundle of joy an accident or a mistake) that happened to me a year out of high school. Her sperm donor was a guy I had met while working at dad’s lumber camp. He was a seasonal worker who had just enough charm to get my guard down but not enough smarts to keep from bragging to the guys at the camp (most of whom had known me since I was a toddler). And it got worse when my brothers heard about it. One resounding beat down and he skipped town. There was a rumor going around that dad had introduced him to the camp’s wood chipper, but it was one of my jobs back then to inspect and maintain all the camp’s equipment. It was still  as dirty as usual, but completely gore free.

A couple weeks later I found out I was pregnant and eight months after that Emma was born. At three foot tall and with her strawberry blonde hair, mischievous smile, and freckled face, Emma is my leprechaun. She drives her grandfather crazy though, because she would rather draw picture of a tree than climb one. But he still spoils her rotten as his first grandchild. Besides that, Gus’ lil one is two and already trying to climb anything he can reach. So there, he can take over the family legacy. My lil girl can be an artist if she wants to, she already has been dragging me to the new craft store that opened in the mall last year.

But enough about that, let’s get back to the story. I took the last available time to meet the new teacher, had to really thanks to work. I no longer work at the logging camp, nowadays I work for the local forestry department thanks to dad’s friend the Mayor. We got there just as Tate McGuket and his son were leaving. He’s gonna be an interesting one for this teach to handle, he seems to take after his grandfather some. Smart as a whip and cuckoo for coco puffs.    

Walking into the class room I looked around. While the room was still painted in the same color scheme as the rest of the school, it somehow looked warmer, more inviting. And around the room was art of various fairy tale characters. But of all the change that had happened to this old room since I was last in it, the most striking is it’s occupant. Shoulder length, wavy brown hair. Half rim glasses that just barely obscure his milk chocolate brown eyes. And an interesting taste in fashion, if what he was wearing today was an example. He had on a pair of khaki carpenter pants and a red and white floral Hawaiian shirt. I could tell they were carpenter pants because he actually had a hammer hanging in it’s loop. He apologized and explained that he was taking time in between meetings to finish up the decorating and he liked to keep his tools at the ready. I responded that I used to keep an ax on me for the same reason.

We bantered on like that for a couple of minutes before we got down to the matter at hand. He went over the daily schedules; nap time, lunch time, and snack time. He pointed to a small refrigerator in the corner and said that snacks were supposed to be provided by the parents, but he will be keeping some fruit and veggies packs and juice boxes in class for those who are unable to provide their own. He believed that no child should go hungry if there was anything he could do about it. Dude scored some major points with me right there and I asked if there would be any way to donate some goods to the cause. He chuckled and with a smile so warm it nearly melted the wax apple he had on his desk said he would be glad of any help I would offer.

He then went on to first explain that there was only three students in class from Gravity Falls proper. the rest were from Provost, the next town over. Then he went to the curriculum, talking about how he liked to read various fairy tales to the class during nap time for those who don’t want to sleep. As he went on I noticed Emma was taking an  interest in the various art he had on the wall. When he got to covering the alphabet, that caught her attention and she hopped up onto her seat and belted out the alphabet song in rapid fashion. He gave her an applause and said that he may just have her help him teach that to the rest of the class. He loved her enthusiasm. This earned him a squeal of delight and hug that he readily accepted. Then she noticed he had a set of MonsterMon Plushies in one corner of the class room and asked if she could go play with them while we talk. With another chuckle he told her to go have fun.

While Emma was having a blast with the stuffed animals, he finished up on the curriculum. He then asked if I had any questions. So I asked why he chose a small town like Gravity Falls as his first teaching assignment and he explained how he had two great uncles who run a tourist stop just outside of town and how he and his sister moved up here to help keep track of them as they got older. It was my turn to chuckle then. I told him that with his last name, I should have put two and two together, I used to work at that tourist trap back when I was a teen and knew both of the Stans. Once that he mentioned it I did see a little family resemblance. He was slimmer than either of them, but he definitely had the Stans’ jaw line. Looking back on it I guess that maybe I started getting interested back then, but I always was a stubborn one. Some how though I think Emma noticed my interest before I did even.

Over the next couple weeks Emma was always happy to go to school, she had made friends with most of her class. Then one Friday morning she seemed reluctant to go to school. When I asked her why, she told me that one of the kids from out of town was picking on her over her freckles. It was getting to her. My first response was to tell her to just deck him, but I knew that would only worsen the matter. So I told her to tell him that it was bugging her and if that didn’t work to tell me later and I would set up a meeting with Mr. Pines over the matter.

Well apparently the kid started in on her as she got to class, but this time Mr. Pines caught him. He explained that words could hurt and that anyone could be picked on. When the boy exclaimed that there was no way that Mr. Pines could have been picked on, that he was too nice for that, he told them that he was picked on for most of his childhood until he decided to take his torment and wear it as a badge of honor. He brushed his bangs back and showed them that he had a birthmark on his forehead that resembled the big dipper. He told them that when his classmates had learned the name they began calling him Dipper. It wasn’t until his family started calling him that, that he not only accepted it but grew to love the nickname. He told them that except for a few places, like at school, he still went by the name Dipper to this day. The kid apologized to her and they became friends by the end of class.  I got most of this from Emma when she got home, but Mr. Pines did end up calling to check up on her and to make sure I knew of the incident. We talked for a little bit after I thanked him for the report, and apparently I was watched during the conversation. I think Emma was already plotting something even then.

That Saturday we ended up getting lunch at Yumberjacks in celebration of her good report. After we sat down Emma saw that he was eating at a table on the other side of the dining area. She was about to call out to him when we saw that he was joined by a young lady that I could tell was probably the sister he had mentioned, but Emma had not heard that part of our conversation. She stopped herself from calling out to him and after a moment she went back to eating. She had recognized Mr. Pines sister as the owner of her favorite craft shop and suddenly on Sunday she needed a new jar of brown finger paint.

When we got to the store, Miss Pines was behind the counter. Emma started talking to her like normal. I could see the family resemblance now that I knew to look for it. After a couple of moments, Emma said she had drawing that she wanted to show Mabel, as he name tag proclaimed, so she could see if she liked it and if I could I go get the paint for her. I left only after Mabel said she would be glad to check out the work of another artist and swore she would not let Emma out of her sight. I recently learned Emma had showed Mabel a drawing of me and her brother and asked Mabel what her “attentions” were towards Mr. Pines. Mabel apparently loved it and had to fight to keep from laughing so loud that I would hear. She explained to Emma that she was his sister and that she liked her moxie. She then told her that she had heard about Emma from her brother. And that she had also heard about me, also. Mabel had been wanting to meet me, because her matchmaker-senses kept going off whenever her brother had talked about me. These two began conspiring to fix us up then and there.

The next thing I knew we would begin to run into Mr. Pines everywhere. He would be at the grocery store whenever we would go pick up supplies. And inevitably either he or he and his sister would be at a restaurant when we would get there or they would show up shortly afterwards. Another thing I learned recently was that Emma had put Mabel’s number in her Lil Firefly tm phone her Aunt Tambry had gotten her for her last birthday. They would text and plan these little encounters.

Eventually we started sharing tables to save the wait staff the hassle of busing two separate tables when one would do. More often than not the conversations would end up being Mabel and Emma talking about some cartoon or an art project of some type, while Dipper (he had finally told me in person to call him that during one of these meals) and I talked amongst ourselves. It was so refreshing to talk to someone my own age who was into bad cinema as much as I was. It was weird, here was someone I had not met prior to last September and it was beginning to feel like I had known him most of my life.

It was apparently so obvious that something was happening that even Lee had learned of it up in Portland. He wanted “all the details about my new beau”. I tried to tell him that we weren’t dating. We just ate dinner together a lot and had plans to watch some old B-movies while Tambry was babysat Emma. He laughed and told me that “that sounds like dating to me”. That fact that he was able to confirm it hit me, I was dating my daughter’s teacher. And you know what, it didn’t bug me as much as I thought it would. Dipper was sweet, handsome, intelligent, and a complete gentleman. I’m not sure I could do better if I tried. We started officially dating the day after Emma graduated from kindergarten. I came home from that first date to find a ‘new’ piece of art on her picture wall, it was the folded picture that Emma had shown Mabel all those months ago when they first conspired to get us together..

I still need to thank them…              

#gravity falls #wendy corduroy #dipper pines #wendip #au

[littlemisssquiggles]

Hello! I'm sorry if I'm bothering you, but have you watched the Alita Battle Angel movie? If not, the synopsys is that an old doctor finds a cyborg bust in a scrapyard of trash that is dumped everyday by the floating city above, called Zalem. In your latest musing you mentioned something about trash being dumped from Atlas. What would you think if Upper Atlas were similar and it would dump trash in a scapyard, in Lower Atlas? And the workers there making use of it however they can?

‘SupYellow.Always a pleasure to hear from you so no worries there fam. Unfortunately I have notseen Alita.But I definitely want to since I’ve heard positive things about it; both themanga and the recent film adaptation. Despite knowing jack about the series, Ido like the idea you present here. 

It wouldn’t surpriseme if something like that were possible with Atlas. It’s funny. Folks keepreferring to Atlas by Upper and Lower. Wouldn't Upper Atlas technically be just Atlas while the lower sector is the remnants of Mantle?

That’swhat I assumed it was. The lower city being Mantle below, unless I am deeplymistaken. I like the idea of Atlas dumping their trashinto Mantle with the People of Mantle living the life of scavengers;only managing to survive due to their resourceful nature by crafting workingmachinery and equipment from whatever scraps of and parts they managed tosalvage and/or pilfer from the junkyards dumped from Atlas.

It’dbe interesting if Atlas has become rather snobbish and discriminatory towardtheir Mantlese brethren over the years to the point that they don’t even donate their broken or unused materials to Mantle’scitadel, only granting them use of whatever they can scavenge from the massivepiles of junk they dump into their kingdom periodically. Like the rich andelite only granting charity to the poor by allowing them to take what they canfrom their trash bins for the week and considering that an act of generosity.

Imagine if … the Atlesians are the typeswho have grown so spoilt from their riches that they no longer see worth in their products anymore. To Atlas, it’s allabout advancement.Forwardever, backward never and when theold outdates the new, the old is disposed of so that the new can rise up andthrive. Take over even and lead them successfully towards a bright future. Itwouldn’t surprise if that is the mantra of Atlas because that is precisely whathappened with Atlas and Mantle’s history. Atlas rose up to the point that it overshadowed Mantle and rather than aid those left behind intheir predecessor kingdom, it seems that Atlas has lost all touch with itsroots.

Allthe more reason why I’m digging the concept of the People of Mantle being scavengers—thegood kind who see worth ineverything around them, since their generations have been forced to survive onso little for so long and thus become more adaptive and more appreciative ofwhat they have and cherish.  And becauseof that, they are able to make wonders with what bit they can use from the UpperWorld.

Thisalso makes me think of a really cool hunch I have concerning Penny Polendina’sfather/creator. For the sake of my musings, I’m going to refer to him as Dr. Japheth Polendina until his official canon name is revealed. If mymemory serves correctly, Gepetto isthe Italian form of the name Japheth whichis a name of Hebrew origin meaning ‘expansion’.  

I think Japheth is afitting pseudo-name for Dr. Polendina since my assumption is that he is a greatand well-renowned scientist and inventor in Atlas whose inventions hascontributed towards the kingdoms’ advancement. Makes sense, right? Beyond that,another theory I have is Dr. Polendina is unlike a lot of Atlesians . Itwouldn’t surprise me if Dr. Polendina, like many from his generation (MariaCalavera and Nicholas Schnee) was born after the Great War and contributedtowards Atlas taking over from Mantle.

Howeverunlike other Atlesians who seem to have discarded theirMantlese heritage and traditions, Dr. Polendina still holds stubbornly onto his.I like the irony of Dr. Polendina being old-fashioned despite being the inventor of so many creationsthat helped Atlas move forward. I think that could be a cool contrast to hischaracter. I like the idea of Dr. Polendina being a smart yet modest and humbleold man (maybe even a lil cuckoo for coco puffs), who doesn’t just create foradvancement but rather help humanity because he genuinely sees wonder and value in everything around him. Despite it being a traditionhis younger associates don’t understand and have tried to beat out of him foryears, y’know since they all mostly consider him a fossil and only keep himaround for his unique genius. Nonetheless Dr. Polendina sees worth in everything—includinga lifeless robotic husk he treated and loved like a daughter. That’s my theoryfor Dr. Polendina if you or anyone who were ever curious.

Ithink an anon-ninja once asked me what elements of Gepetto/Pinocchio I think will be incorporated in V7. Well I thinkthat’s one of them. I’d love to think that Japheth also shares a history with Arthur Watts.I can’t help this nagging hunch I have that Arthur Watts was probably the formerapprentice of Dr. Polendina who he loved like a son.

Inthe Pinocchio tale, Geppetto was an elderly woodcarver whoseemed to not have any former children of his own hence why he createdPinocchio and wished for him to be a real boy.

Imagine if it was the same for Dr.Polendina. Whatif… Japheth was a man who had dedicated his life so much toadvancing Atlas that he never got the chance to have the thing he wanted morethan anything—a family or at least someone to love him like one. Picture Japheth living a depressing life where he losttouch with his former family in Mantle and the closest thing to a family he hadin Atlas was a former apprentice who he cherished like the child he never had whoended up betrayinghim before disappearing entirely,believed to be dead (i.e. Dr. Arthur Watts) and lastly, Penny—the android heloved like a daughter but also ultimately lost.

Ican go on and on about my theories for Dr. Polendina but that’s the theory Imainly wish to share here. As you brought up Alita, it made me think ofsomething interesting. I have this Penny-centric theorywhere as soon as our heroes arrive in Atlas, they soon discover, much toRuby’s shock and disgust that Penny was made into a line of sentient service androidswho was being mass produced and sold to the People of Atlas.

Picture Detroit Become Human but with just Penny asthe sole android series. RWBY Chibi S2 kindof teased the concept of Penny being sold as a doll. So what ifthat will be the case for V7? What if…in current Atlas, Penny is now a popular brand of service androiddolls sold to the Atlesian public to perform many different roles insociety. Picture Penny being like the Barbie Doll of Atlas exceptthat she’s a life-sized sentient machine. Picture all kinds of Penny models beingsold each programmed with a series of different functions tailor made to fitwhatever role her user/buyer bought her to perform.

Imagine Ruby standing in acity populated with different Pennies—-Waitress Penny, Nurse Penny, Traffic Cop Penny, TourGuide Penny, etc.—who all look and sound just like Ruby’s Pennybut isn’t her. And what’s even more horrifying to Ruby is what Penny’s legacyhas dissolved into. Back in V3 I believe, Penny told Ruby that she wasoriginally made to protect Remnant. She was made to be a hero. The first of her kind tobe used to protect humanity.

Imagine howmuch of an insult it would be if this is what Ruby finds out Atlasdid to her friend after she was murdered. Not remember her as a hero butbasically a living toy to beused and abused as her consumers feel.

That’sinsane!Which is all the more reason why I want this theory to come true. I was askedlong ago by a FNDM fam about how Ruby would feel if she saw Penny locked away insidesome pod inside a laboratory. I never got around to actually answering that questionbecause Tumblr buried the original response post I was going to edit. If thatuser happens to read all of my answer posts, here is my answer to your questionnow.

Rubyreacting to a rebuilt Penny being locked safely inside a pod? Ahahaa! How about I giveyou something grimmer?

Ontop of Atlas mass producing Penny and treating her like a plaything rather than the heroshe was meant to be, you wanna know my theory for what they did with originalPenny?

Myhunch is that originalPenny is put in the trash. Meaningthat after her body was returned to Atlas, there was a meeting between themembers of the Atlas Council debating on whether or not the military projectPenny was born from should be terminated or not. Even though Ironwood is the mainauthoritarian from Atlas that we’ve met so far, I’d like to think there is another topleader calling the shots whoIronwood actually serves under.

Ifthe Atlas Council is anything like Vale’s, then there are at least threemembers on the council governing the Kingdom. From what I remember back in V4,Ironwood says he holds two seats on the council. This leaves the third and lastseat and it’s here where I think we’ll have a new authoritarian character who Ironwoodlistens to.

Basicallyit was this Atlas Council Member introduced and signed off on the idea ofturning Penny into a doll to be sold to the public.  I don’t know of any puppet masters in any knownfairy tales but perhaps this Councilman, as I’ll refer to him in mymusings, could be based off of the Coachman from Pinocchio. In the 1883 book TheAdventures of Pinocchio, the Coachman was a villain who kidnapped children tobring them to Toy Island in which the bad children turned into donkeys.

IfFNDM fam thought General Ironwood was a cross due to his deep authoritarian waysand leadership then imagine someone worse than Ironwoodbut lacking the compassion. Picture… the Councilman being the type to make ajackass out of the General Ironwood since Ironwood generally has torun everything by him and the Councilman has Ironwood wrapped around his pinkie,especially now that he hasn’t been well—psychologically. I actually kinda digthis idea.

Sothe Councilman convinces Ironwood that the best way to dissolve the mess the Vytalescapade left on the military and the People of Atlas following Beacon is to turnPenny into a doll series—allowing her to fulfil the purpose she was made for.Serving humanity by serving humanity as a service doll. There are even Penniesbeing used by the military.

WhileDr. Polendina wouldn’t sign off on something like this—imagine it being oneof those uncomfortable scenarios where one’s hand is forced because they arebacked into a corner by people trying to either bullyor manipulate them. In the case of Japheth, it was both theCouncilman trying to bully him into doing his job for the military and Ironwood,though sympathetic towards the doctor and his loss, still trying to somewhatemotionally manipulate the man into doing as he and the Councilman ordered byusing Penny and the reasons she was made in the first place as his motive.

It’snot a nice game but in the end, against his wishes, Dr. Polendina had no choicebut to hand over his research and the original body of Penny and concur as themilitary—mainly the Councilman did what they pleased with her.

Andin the end, once they were done, they didn’t even have the common courtesy toreturn Penny to her father. Instead, like many things in Atlas, Penny wasdiscarded and her remains ended up in the junkyards near Mantle. I even have away RWBY canincorporate Monstro into the Atlas Arc. You know how in Pinocchio,Gepetto got swallowed by the giant whale?

Wellwhat if…at some point, the heroes visit Lower Atlas on their voyage towards Mantle. Mytheory is that at some point during the Schnee Family Affairsstoryline of the Atlas Arc, Weiss will go in search of her missing grandfatherNicholas Schnee and her searches will take her and her friends down from Atlasinto Mantle’s depth. During their voyage, the group end up in the junkyardsbelow.

Apparently,people aren’t allowed to go in the junkyards. Part of it is due to Atlas being stingy towards Mantle even with their junk and anotheris for the reason that there is a massive Grimm known to roam the junkyards.That monster is GrimmMonstro—a colossal land whale type Grimm that burrows undergroundand swims through the sea of garbage in the junk piles looking for anyunsuspecting victims to rise up and swallow.

I have this idea where Ruby andOscar are swallowed alive by Grimm Monstro and it’s in the belly of the Grimm where Ruby discovers Penny’s originaldestroyed body. Perhaps…as a better alternative, that’s how she and Oscargot swallowed in the first place. Ruby spots OG Penny while in the junkyard.Goes off on her own to retrieve her despite Oscar’s initial warnings that somethingfelt off about the junkyard however Ruby ignores hisadvice. Ruby makes it to Penny’s body in time for Grimm Monstro to rise up.Oscar jumps in to rescue Ruby. The two try their best to outrun the giant Grimmbut end up getting swallowed alive. That could be FREAKING EPIC!

Little Red Riding Hood and PrincessOzma working together to escape Monstroand save themselves plus Pinocchio is a future RWBY episodeI’d love to see for Atlas. YES PLEASE! Sign my ass up!

Andif all that comes true, we could even get Ruby and Oscar working together to revive original Penny.

Ifmy theory about Oscarawakening his inner mechanic and inventor comes to fruition, imagine Ruby begging Oscar to help her revive her formerfriend using his skills. Knowing and fully understanding how much this means toRuby, Oscar accepts and the two rosebuds get to work together. I would lovethis so much!

Ithink this could be really cool especially if after Penny gets successfully restoredthrough Oscar’s know-how, she starts calling Oscar ‘brother’. I’ll give you three veryimportant reasons why I love this idea.

Firstly,I’ve seen some fans comparing Oscar to Penny so me, being the proud Pinehead and Polendiva (Penny Polendina fan) that I amstarted to dig the idea of Penny and Oscar having a brother-sister dynamic.Like after Oscar helps rebuild her, Penny starts treating him like he was her big brother.Not father since Dr. Japheth is her father.

Secondly,I like Penny calling Oscar ‘brother’ because of the obvious, very on the nosecall back to FMA. Come on! You know how much I love those.

Andlastly, I love this idea because it appeals to another Pinehead headcanon I have where Oscar becomes an apprentice under Dr. Polendina anddevelops a father/son bond with the old inventor. I did say I wantedOscar to have a godmother type character who adopts him in Atlas. Perhapsinstead of a fashion designer, it’s an genius inventor who acts as hisgodfather.

Penny andDr. Polendina both adopting Oscar into their family = HELLA FREAKING YES.

You know my mantra. #EverybodyAdoptsOscar

I’dlove to expand more on this idea some more but I think I’ll save it for anothermusing. This response post is long enough. But for what it’s worth, I hope youlike my answer Yellow.Let me know what you think if you can pretty please. Would like to hear yourthoughts on my thoughts.

~LittleMissSquiggles(2019)

#squiggles answers: rwby #oscar pine #ruby rose #penny polendina #rwby theories #rwby v7 theories #rwby volume 7 #rwby v7 #yellow-eyed-green-crocodile #pinehead headcanons #squiggles pinehead headcanons

[lovemesomesurveys]

[created by: -ily-ylm-]   Have you ever said to someone, "Bite Me"? Why did you say that? I don’t think I have, actually. 

Have you ever given someone the "Stink Eye"?   Yeah.

Are you addicted to Tim Hortons Iced Capps? I’ve never been to a Tim Horton’s, they don’t have one here, but I hear it’s all the rage. I’d like to try it sometime.

Did you like the beach a lot more as a kid more than you do now? Why/Why not? I love it much more now. It’s my place where I actually feel like I can relax. 

What's the best way someone can show you they love you? The little things, really. Grabbing me a coffee or my favorite food on the way home, binge watching a show with me, taking an interest in something I’m interested in, remembering little things I’ve told them, being supportive, being caring. 

Do you like when people give you big hugs? I like them from certain people.

Have you ever told someone you fucking love them? Who? Not so aggressively, no.

Can you tell when someone who was your friend, doesn't like you anymore? Well, it’s hard to say how accurate or not I am cause I just feel like everyone gets annoyed and tired of me. I’ll notice a change in their tone or something and think they’re annoyed. I’ll wonder how long before they get bored. I’m not anything special or great. I’m not all that interesting. I’m replaceable. I also have always felt like the people I felt/feel closest to don’t feel the same way about me. Not the same level I do, at least.

How about when a guy or crush doesn't like you anymore, can you tell? It’s the same thing I just said. I felt it with Joseph and Ty. Especially Joseph. I just knew he wasn’t into it, into me, anymore. They realized I wasn’t worth it.

Exactly how can you tell? I just get the feeling. I feel their tone change or just how they act when we’re together. 

Have you ever seriously rolled on the floor laughing? What from? No. I’ve laughed until I had tears running down my face, knee slapping, and my stomach hurt, but I never literally rolled around on the floor.

Do you and your best friends usually act crazy? No.

If so, do you act like that when alone, or publicly or both? --

Has there ever been a time where you just couldn't stop crying? Yes.

"Everyone has someone that keeps them looking forward to another day" To the statement above, do you agree or disagree?   Sadly, no, not everyone. There’s people who feel very alone and like they don’t have anyone. 

Have you ever experienced a feeling that was just too much to handle? What emotion or feeling was it? Losing loved ones was extremely hard for me. And these past few years have been really hard for me. It feels like too much. 

Do you think you could win at a hot dog eating contest? Ew, absolutely not. I’m a suuuuper slow eater and I get full quickly, but that’s besides the point because I think eating contests are disgusting and horrible. I can’t imagine how sick they must feel. I’ve seen stuff like that on TV and blech it makes me gag.

Have you ever tried to hold on to someone that was impossible to hold onto? Yeah, you could say that. 

What do you think of the word "Forever."? It gets thrown a lot.

What's your least favorite time of day? Why don't you like that time? For me, it’s around like 9 until about 130/2AM. I have a schedule and routine and so for me I eat dinner around 8 and then after that I just try and pass the time somehow during that block time until I start my nighttime routine. Sounds weird I know, but I like to do things a certain way. Honestly, so much of day is just waiting until the next thing.

Do actions TRULY speak louder than words? They’re pretty loud. Words can say a lot, but they can also be empty. 

If bread was eliminated, would you really care all that much? I’d sure miss sourdough bread. 

What if all dairy products were too, then would you care? I’d be really upset about cheese. I love cheese. I always add shredded cheese to my ramen and it’s SO good.

Were you ever a fan of Hilary Duff? Has her music gotten better or worse? Yeah, I liked her and her music. 

Do you like your lips? Do you enjoy kissing? My lips are small and I bite/pick at them way too much. I do enjoy kissing. It’s been a longggg time since I’ve kissed anyone, though.

Do you like any music from the American Idols? Which ones? I like a lot of Kelly Clarkson’s music. I liked Daughtry, Adam Lambert, and David Archuleta as well.

Are you someone who just can't get enough of that sugar crisp? Sugar crisp?

Do you and your best friend talk to each other on the toilet? ...No. Eww, that reminds me of that scene from Harold and Kumar with the two girls who play what they call, “battle shits”, which is a game they play while on the toilet. So gross, lol.

Are frosted flakes GRRRRREAT? Why or why not? I think they’re pretty yummy.

Are you cuckoo for coco puffs? Coco Puffs are good, too.

Have you ever loved a total ignorant egoistic jerk? Do you still love him or have you stopped loving him? No, can’t say that I have.

Do you agree that whatever's' meant to be will work out perfectly? I wouldn’t say perfectly, no, but I do believe whatever is meant to be will happen. The problem is it’s not always going to be what you hope for. 

Are you SURE money can't buy happiness? It can buy happiness in some ways. You can do things that would make you happy and get things that would bring joy, but it’s fleeting. You’ll feel good in the moment. There’s just some things it simply can’t buy or fix. 

Have you ever just thought, "Whatever, screw the calories" ? I don’t care about calories, so.

If so, what did you say that about, like what food? That’s not a concern for me when I eat to be honest.

Could your parents handle you and your best friends as sisters? My best friend is my mom, so...

Instead of dating, would you rather just make out and call it a day? Why? No. I’m almost 32 years old, I’m not looking for a fling.

Is there someone that makes you feel out of your element? Hmm. No one in my life currently.

What is truly, seriously sexy? Define or describe it: Alexander Skarsgard, ha.

Are you what they call a "love addict"? Explain. No.

On a scale of 1-10, how much do you like personal affection? Uh, I mean I like feeling loved and cared for? It’s a good feeling. Kind gestures are sweet. I’m not big on the physical affection, like I’m not a hugger by nature. I show it in other ways.

Have you ever REALLY wanted someone to just shut up? Why was that? Ha, yes. Sometimes it’s because they’re just talking about something ridiculous. Sometimes they’re just talking too much. Sometimes they’re too loud. Sometimes they’re just annoying. Sometimes I get overwhelmed and feel drained talking to certain people. 

Is there someone that makes you fall in love all over again every time? No.

Do you believe TRUE beauty is found in the heart? Do you swear by it? I believe so. You can be physically gorgeous, but if you’re personality is shit and you’re a crappy person then that makes you ugly in my opinion. That more so than how a person looks physically.

Has your sarcasm ever hurt someone’s feelings? What did you say?   It’s possible. 

Do you like when people challenge you? If so, in what? Uhhh. I don’t know. That could make me feel more stressed and overwhelmed and pressured. I don’t want to feel pushed. I want to be supported and encouraged, but challenged? Ehhh.

Do you like to be often reminded that you are loved? I never doubt or feel like my family doesn’t love me. 

Do you like when people admit your right when you are? What if they don't? I’m not someone who has to be right or have it be acknowledged by others. 

"There's nothing a girl wants more than something she can't have" To the statement above, do you agree? Have you ever been in that situation? I think that’s a feeling many people feel, not just specifically girls. And it’s not a general statement, either. Some people are very content with what they have. I have felt that way at times, sure, but not always.

Could you even live without your best friend in your life? I don’t want to think about that.

Personally for you, is falling for someone way beyond your control? Yes.

Do you agree life screws us all over at least one time in life? Yes. 

Explain a time where you got TOTALLY screwed over: The accident that made me a paraplegic is up there on the list. I was 7 months old when I was the victim of random gun violence. It changed my life forever.

Do your friends completely understand your past and accept it?

Do they also accept and believe in your future?

Spell out the letters I-H-O-P, then say ness. Do you get it? I didn’t have to say it out loud to get it.

Do you think ,dream and worry about love? It’s not at the forefront of my thoughts, dreams, and worries to be honest. I’m not seeking that at this time. I’m focused on and wrapped up in other things.

How about do you want love, or looking for it? ^^^

Do you randomly eat when your bored? What do you eat usually? I don’t eat out of boredom anymore. I used to be that way, though. Back when I was a foodie and had a normal appetite and was without the food restrictions I have now.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

[speakpirate]

FIC: One Last Time (Thirteen PLL Endings)

I. Return to Camelot

Aria wakes up to sunlight streaming in through the wooded slats of Spencer’s barn. Last night’s storm must have blown itself out, which is great for their flight to Reykjavik probably being on time this afternoon, not so great for the present moment of the light making her eye sockets throb with pain. She puts a hand to her temple, flinching at the feel of her friendship bracelet brushing against her forehead.

She hears shuffling noises in the corner, manages to turn just enough to see Emily blushing furiously, as she zips up her blue Sharks hoodie and stuffs her bra into one of the pockets. Alison’s yellow tank top is crumpled in the corner, and Ali herself is pulling the t-shirt that Em was wearing last night over her head with a smile like the cat who ate a whole flock of canaries on her face.

Aria can’t be bothered to wonder about whatever they’re up to. Not when she’s groggy and her head feels like it’s been replaced with a bowling ball full of sand. And there’s no use trying to figure out Alison anyway. The Queen B is her own law, and secrets have always been her favorite currency.

Spencer moans as she gingerly stands up, then staggers over towards the hot plate to try and make coffee.

“What was in those drinks last night?” Aria asks, her voice cracking and a little hoarse. “I feel like I was drugged.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Alison breezes. “You gals just can’t hold your liquor.”

“Seriously,” Hanna groans, her face a delicate shade of green. “I feel like I got hit by car.”

“I woke up like three times,” Spencer yawns. “I thought I heard a scream.”

Emily starts coughing, her face bright red, as Alison pats her smoothly on the back.

“No one screamed,” Alison scoffs. “You were probably having that anxiety dream about your French final again.” She casts a sidelong look at Emily as she says it, batting her eyelashes and leaning towards her a little. Emily gives her a shy smile in return and scoots towards Ali just enough so that their shoulders are touching.

Aria feels a tingle of deja vu, a murky sense that she knows something, she’s just not sure what.

There’s a loud buzzing from underneath her pillow. She reaches for her clumsily for her phone. As she blurrily tries to focus on the text from her mom, it hits her in a flash. A nightmare landscape of anonymous text message and faceless stalkers and Alison missing and an underground bunker and long lost sisters and red coats and black hoodies.

“Aria, are you okay?” Spencer asks, a concerned look on her face.

“I’m fine,” Aria tells her, shaking her head to clear out the residual strands of panic and fear. “I had a really crazy dream.”

--------------------------------

II. Boys Will Be Boys

“You?” Hanna exclaims, stunned. “You’re dead!”

Wilden laughs as he grabs her by the hair. “Have you forgotten where you are, little girl? This is Rosewood. Guys like me don’t go easy.”

“You killed Charlotte,” Alison says, spitting in his face as he checks the ropes binding her wrists.

“She outlived her usefulness,” he says, coldly.

“Why?” Spencer asks, still pleading for answers. “Why would you do this to us?”

His face contorts into an ugly sneer. “You still haven’t figured it out? After all this time?”

He kicks Emily’s unconscious body into a hastily dug grave in the Hastings backyard, then looks at the bound and gagged Aria appraisingly. He tosses her in on top of Emily, apparently deciding she’s small enough to fit.

“Don’t keep us guessing,” Spencer says, goading him. “You want to tell us. You won’t let us die without telling us the reason.”

“The reason?” He moves closer to her, until the tip of his nose is almost touching hers. “A detective to the end.” His voice drops to a hiss. “Little Sister.”

“No,” Alison says. “No. What are you saying?”

“Oh, is it finally falling into place now?” His voice is dripping with sarcasm and contempt. “You girls don’t know everything after all! How else do you think all that evidence got planted against you? How could someone have access to every single security feed in town? A badge and a gun and a smile will get you some truly amazing things. Did you think I helped Jessica cover up all of her dirty work out of the goodness of my heart? Because I didn’t. It’s who I am. I was born to it. I’m Charles.”

“Are you crazy?” Hanna scoffs. “I mean, obviously yes - you’re cuckoo for CoCo Puffs! But Charlotte was Charles. We know that.”

“Charlotte was a patsy. We never imagined anyone would believe that ridiculous story! It had more holes than a colander made of Swiss Cheese.”

“I don’t understand,” Alison tells him. “If you’re Charles, who was she?”

“An old friend of mine. From Radley. Your father did lock me up and throw away the key. Just because I tried to kill you a few dozen times when you were a baby. But boys will be boys, right? No need to ruin my life over a squalling little girl!”

He’s so intent on his story, he never sees the shadowy figures sneaking up behind him. Melissa Hastings shoves him to the ground as Mona Vanderwaal pounces on him with a rock in hand. She bashes him over the head repeatedly, until the back of his head is smashed in, and he’s thoroughly and unquestionably dead.

Melissa is already untying Spencer and the others, as Mona hops into the freshly dug grave to haul Emily and Aria out. Once that’s done, Melissa uses the toe of her Tory Burch boots to roll him over until he flops unceremoniously to the bottom of the hole.

“I brought shovels,” Mona offers, brightly. She hands them out and everyone slowly gets to work heaving the nearby mound of dirt over him. Melissa makes a call and Jason shows up half an hour later with three large rose bushes which they use to make the whole thing look like an intentional planting project.

“It’s over,” Mona declares, brushing the dirt off her hands when they’re finished. “For good this time.”

“And since he was already supposed to be dead, no one’s going to come looking for him,” Melissa nods.

“But what about Archer?” Spencer asks, her face white and pinched. “Tanner was breathing down our necks, she has evidence -”

“Had evidence, Sweetie,” Mona responds, patting her on the elbow.

“Dad got it tossed,” Melissa explains. “And the police just discovered an extra key to Lucas Gottesman’s car at the Kahn cabin. Along with a bloody sweatshirt with Archer’s blood and Noel’s DNA all over it. And Archer’s missing credit card. Even Tanner can follow that trail. So it’s case closed.”

“What do we now?” Emily asks, still a little dazed.

“We get on with our lives,” Alison answers, a smile slowly breaking over her face. “Who’s up for a sleepover?”

-------------------------------------------

III. Double Vision

“This is it,” Spencer says, barely able to suppress her excitement. She’s sitting elbow to elbow with the others in a black van that Mona has rigged up for mobile surveillance.

“I don’t like this plan,” Emily protests. “Why can’t we just go to Tanner with what we know?”

“Because we have no proof,” Hanna says, throwing up her hands. “And she’s never going to believe that some rando is walking around town wearing Spencer’s face.”

“Shh,” Aria says, motioning for quiet. “She’s on the move.”

They watch in silence as Spencer’s doppelganger leaves the Radley and hurries to a silver SUV. It’s an identical match to Spencer’s own car.

Mona follows her from a distance, headlights off, as they head towards the Lost Woods resort. Not-Spencer gets out of her car and looks furtively over her shoulder as she steps quickly into Room 2.

Mona parks out of sight, gliding soundlessly to a stop, as they all pile out of the vehicle.

“Ready?” Alison asks.

“Ready,” Emily confirms, clutching a taser in hand.

Aria nods, unclipping a can of pepper spray from her belt.

They swarm towards the room and Mona rigs a small explosive charge to the lock. At the push of a button, it explodes with a flash.

The six of them move into the room under the cover of a cloud of smoke. There’s instant confusion as they’re attacked from all sides by what seems like a small crowd of unseen foes.

As the smoke clears, Hanna finds herself with her hands around Spencer’s throat.

“Hanna, what are you doing?” her assailant gasps. “It’s me!”

“It’s not,” Spencer shouts, from where she’s tussling with Aria. “I’m the real Spencer!”

“Wait,” another Aria protests, “Who’s that?”

“Oh my god,” Alison says, looking around in shock. “We all have twins?”

“Isn’t it great?” Charlotte asks, clapping her hands with glee. She puts a hand to her mouth and does her best Oprah impression. “You get a twin! And you get a twin! And you get a twin!”

“You’re not the real Aria,” Emily cries, pointing to the one fighting Spencer. “You have beef jerky in your pocket!”

“And this Hanna’s roots are badly done,” Mona shouts, kicking Hanna’s twin with the lesser dye job to the ground.

“Em,” one of the Alison’s says, crouching behind her girlfriend. “We need to get out of here. All this violence, it’s not good for the baby!”

“That’s not me,” the other Alison shouts as she trades blows with a possibly fake Mona.

“Emily,” the first Alison says, “you know me. You know every inch of my body.” She grabs Emily and kisses her hard. The moment they break apart, Emily tasers her, knocking her to the floor.

“She opened her mouth,” Emily says. “And I knew.”

Lights and sirens flash outside, and Detective Tanner appears in the doorway. “I have arrest warrants for all of you!” she declares triumphantly. She gasps and her eyes go wide as she takes in the sight in front of her.

“Arrest her,” the Spencer’s say simultaneously, pointing at one another.

“And her,” the Arias and Hannas and Alison’s and Emily’s and Mona’s echo, all pointing wildly around the room, from which Charlotte has already disappeared.

“No son Lindas,” a new voice says, as an identical Tanner twin emerges from the middle of the fray.

Tanner’s eyes roll back in her head and she faints dead away.

-----------------------------------------

IV. Season 60b

“I think ‘A’ stole my bifocals,” Spencer grumbles, making her way slowly over to the rocker on the porch of the Radley Nursing Home.

“They’re on your head, Hun,” Alison tells her. “But Emily got a threatening hologram about her orthopedic shoes.”

“And they took the jello off my dinner tray last night,” Hanna complains.

“Are you sure you didn’t eat the jello and then forget?” Aria asks, looking up from the orange and pink zebra print afghan she’s knitting.

“Hanna’s never wrong about jello,” Emily replies.

“I’m just saying, it’s hard to keep track,” Aria says, counting her stitches. “Most days, I can’t even remember who I’m supposed to be in a love triangle with anymore.”

“I have a plan,” Spencer declares, setting down her large print Agatha Christie novel.

“You’ve been saying that every day for the past fifty-five years,” Alison points out. “I’m not missing bingo.”

“Last time you led us on that wild goose chase through the kitchen, we knocked over all those juice carafes! I had glass in my hair for a week!” Emily shakes her head.

“And he was wearing those gloves because he’s the dishwasher,” Hanna reminds them.

“It’s going to work this time,” Spencer promises, brandishing her cane like a weapon. “We’ll stake out Emily’s locker when she goes to water aerobics. If ‘A’ makes a move to steal her shoes, we’ll be there!”

“Can we get my jello back?” Hanna asks.

“Yes!” Spencer promises eagerly.

“Then I’m in,” Hanna sighs. “I’ll ask Mona to help us.”

“Why?” Spencer huffs.

“Because she’s my friend,” Hanna replies. “And besides, she has a mobility scooter.

----------------------------------------------

V. Mr. Nice Guy

A masked figure is sipping whiskey with a gloved hand, watching several live feeds on a wall of monitors in front of him.

In the loft, Hanna is preparing for bed. Aria is up late at Fitz’s, typing on her computer. He types a few keystrokes and calls up a screen that mirrors her laptop. She’s working on revisions for the book. Boring. Spencer is at the barn, reading The Art of War. Emily and Alison are at the DiLaurentis house, cuddling in front of the television. Mona is spying on Caleb, who’s standing in a doorway across the street from the loft, trying to keep Hanna safe.

He should do something, make a move. Menace someone with a car. Erase the whole hard drive of Aria’s computer. Send a cryptic text. He yawns. Or maybe he’ll just hang out and play Minecraft.

There’s a loud bang, and the door to the lair flies off its hinges. All the Liars plus Caleb, Mona and Detective Tanner burst in.

He presses a button to set off the tear gas canisters, give him time to jump out a window during the smoke. But they don’t go off. He hits another button, one that should activate a plank of hidden spikes to fall on them from the ceiling. Nothing.

“Give it up,” Mona tells him. “We traced the signal.”

“And we hacked your feed,” Caleb adds.

“We disabled all your little party tricks,” Spencer says, leaning against the door frame.

He’s too stunned to move.

“Lucas Gottesman,” Tanner says, pulling out a pair of handcuffs. “You’re under arrest. You have the right to remain silent-”

“I don’t understand,” Hanna says, her face pale and drawn. “You were my friend.”

“I just wanted you to notice me!” he exclaims. “I didn’t want to hurt you! I thought - I thought I could make you really scared and then rescue you! But you kept rescuing yourself! So I had to keep going if I ever wanted to break myself out of the friend zone!”

“You’re insane,” Aria says, putting a protective arm around Hanna’s shoulders.

“She made me this way,” he protests, gesturing at Alison with his cuffed hands. “She made fun of me!”

Tanner gives him a shove in the small of his back. “Get going. You can tell us all about it at the station.”

“No one made you do this,” Emily says as they head for the door.

“How can you say that?” he asks, insulted. “I’m a nice guy!”

-----------------------------------------

VI. Everybody A

“It was me all along,” Jason DiLaurentis says, scowling. “I sent those text messages. I needed to make sure you weren’t going to rat me out to Dad about the NAT stuff.”

“But it was me who started following you around in a dark hoodie,” Wren Kingston declares, shoving Jason out of the way. “It was my idea to do psychological experiments on you all! Just for a bit of fun.”

“Idiots,” Melissa Hastings snarls. “I perfected it. I turned the whole thing into a game.”

“I was better than any of you,” Ezra scoffs. “I had the most cameras.”

“Actually,” Lucas mutters, “I had more. Plus I had sound.”

“I got the closest to actually killing them,” Shana Fring shrugs. “That oughta put me on the top of the pile.”

“Um, I locked them in an underground torture bunker,” Charlotte snarks. “For months.”

“But I tricked Alison into marrying me,” Archer Dunhill laughs.

“I shot Spencer,” Jenna counters. “And they shake in their fashion boots whenever they hear my cane.”

“I faked my own death to drive Spencer insane,” Toby laughs. “God, that was fun.”

“You’re all amateurs,” Mona says, flipping her dark hair over her shoulder. “Accept no substitutions. I clearly set the tone.”

Eddie Lamb pats her on the back. “You sure did, little lady. But you couldn’t have kept it up if I wasn’t smuggling you in and out of Radley.”

“And I helped with the spiritual elements of the game, considerably,” Pastor Ted admits. “God loves putting people through trials. So motivational.”

“I helped, though,” Sean adds. “I wanted to punish them for their loose ways.”

“I just like to watch,” Holden grins. “It’s nothing personal.”

A fistfight breaks out between Garrett, Lorenzo, and Holbrook over who planted more evidence, and the Liars use the argument as a distraction to cover them sneaking out of the Fitzgerald Theater through the backstage exit. Once they’re out, they double back to lock everyone else inside.

“Mona’s got it all recorded,” Hanna says with a big smile.

Alison rolls her eyes as she dials 911.

-----------------------------------------

VII. Everybody Gay

“Everybody get down!” Emily shouts, as a round of gunfire shatters the front window of the Brew.

“Whoever this is, they aren’t messing around,” Hanna mutters as a Moltov cocktail skitters across the floor in their direction.

Aria kicks it away and leads them on quick retreat to barricade themselves in Ezra’s office.

There’s the sound of an explosion from outside and smoke starts to waft under the door.

Spencer picks up the landline on the desk. “The phone line’s been cut.”

Alison clutches Emily’s hand as Mona calmly rolls up her suit jacket and shoves uses it to seal the door.

There are heavy footsteps approaching. They’re almost here.

Just then, the bookcase behind the desk swings forward, revealing a secret passage.

“Come on,” Paige McCullers, hisses. “Through here!”

They hurry into the passageway as Paige locks the entrance behind them. She shepherds them down a flight of stairs and into an underground electrical tunnel where Talia Sandoval is waiting with a fleet of ATVs.

“What is this?” Alison asks, suspiciously.

“Are you serious?” Paige asks incredulously. “It’s the Queer Women’s Underground Escape Network. This town is brutal when it comes to burying its gays.”

“I’m not complaining,” Aria says, climbing on the back of Spencer’s ATV. “But I’m actually not-”

“Please,” Alison scoffs. “Like we haven’t been watching you make moony eyes at Spencer since we were all in tenth grade?”

“What about you?” Emily whispers to Hanna.

“What?” Hanna replies, indignantly. “You think Mona and I never -”

“Shush,” Mona cuts her off. “A lady doesn’t kiss and tell.”

Talia leads them on a wild ride for at least twenty miles of tunnel. They emerge by climbing up through a manhole in the back of the Radley parking lot.

Samara signals to them from behind a tree, and the run through the woods after her until they get to a large clearing with a small plane running and at the ready.

Alison hops into the cockpit and the others strap themselves in. They follow the flight plan, landing in an abandoned industrial park on the outskirts of Atlanta.

Sabrina tosses them the keys to her car. There’s a map in the glove compartment with a rendezvous point marked for a dock off the south coast of Florida.

They get there at dawn, to find Maya St. Germain lolling on the deck of a sailboat. “Well, well,” she says, batting her eyelashes in Emily’s direction. “Look who finally turned up.”

She welcomes them aboard, then casts off the line, setting a course for a small island off the coast of Cuba.

“This really isn’t so bad,” Spencer grins, lounging on the deck and running a hand slowly down Aria’s side. Emily and Alison are holding hands and sitting in adjoining deck chairs. Hanna and Mona aren’t in sight, but judging by the noises coming from below deck, they certainly seem to be enjoying themselves.

The island appears on the horizon, a lush paradise of waterfalls and beaches. Alison squints at the shore, trying to make out the face of the two women waiting on shore to greet them.

It’s Charlotte DiLaurentis, waving happily with the hand that isn’t resting on Melissa Hastings hip.

------------------------------------------------

VIII. Nobody

Aria kicks the masked figure off the balcony. He falls like a sack of bricks, but lands on top of Spencer and Hanna. Spencer tases him, as Hanna claws at his face.

Mona flings herself on top of the pile, hitting him in the back of the head with a weaponized heel spike. Hanna takes advantage of the distraction and manages to pin his wrists long enough for Spencer to slap a pair of Marco’s handcuffs on him.

Alison hauls him to his feet as Emily covers him with her dad’s gun.

Hanna smacks him across the face, hard enough to knock the hood down. Mona reaches over and pulls down the bandana covering the bottom half of his face.

Ben Coogan spits in her eye.

”You?” Alison says, coldly. “You’re nobody!”

Emily’s face is a mask of shock and confusion. “Why?” she says, with genuine pain in her voice. “Why would you do this?”

“You think I didn’t know?” he says, bitterly. “All those times you bailed on our plans at the last second, because Alison needed something? You were supposed to be my girlfriend! Mine!”

“So find a new girlfriend!” Hanna suggests. “Don’t spend seven years on some weird homophobic vendetta against all of us!”

“You’re all just as bad,” Ben announces, sounding unhinged. “You lead guys on, you break their hearts for fun! You don’t care about anyone but each other!”

“Can you believe it?” Spencer deadpans. “When we could have had our pick of predatory Rosewood men?”

“Wait,” Aria says, having just made it down the stairs. “It’s Ben? But - he’s nobody! I haven’t even thought about him in years!”

“I’ve thought about you,” he says, darkly. “All of you. The way Hastings always blew the curve in Trig. The time I changed a flat tire for you, Aria. And you didn’t even let me get to first base.”

“Because you were dating my best friend,” Aria replies, sounding disgusted.

“Who was sneaking off to the Kissing Rock with her perverted little girlfriend.”

“Give it a rest,” Hanna tells him. “I can’t believe we spent all that time being scared of a stupid little boy who’s obviously spent way too much time on Reddit.”

The sound of sirens approaching is getting louder. The police will be arriving any moment now.

“You’re a bunch of emasculating bitches!”

Alison shrugs. “At least we’re not mushy squash.”

----------------------------------------

IX. Sometimes the Villain Wins

Emily still cries when she thinks about it. Two days after the blow up, after they caught Aria red handed and black hoodied in the woods, she walked up the stairs to Ezra’s apartment to find the whole place empty. Cleaned out. Blank walls. Like no one had ever been there.

They were gone. Ella said maybe to Italy. Aria called her from the airport to say they were eloping.

They’d all been so angry. Emily could still feel the white hot rage that tore through her at the thought of Aria throwing blood on their beautiful white crib. Of her wrecking the mobile Emily’s dad had made when she was a baby.

But the anger wasn’t permanent.

Something else would happen. Some new crisis would rear up. They’d all have to work together and be friends again.

But the only thing that happened was Aria and Ezra being gone.

The game stopped.

The batteries ran out and it triggered a self-destruct that singed Mona’s eyebrows, left a black scorch mark on the ceiling of her apartment.

The case against them for Archer Dunhill’s disappearance went away. Mary Drake set a fire in the evidence room on her way out of town, and Peter Hastings dug up some dirt on Tanner. Emily never finds out what it was, but it was enough to convince her to declare Sara Harvey the likely perpetrator. Case closed.

For the first year, they’re all waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It never does.

A is gone.

And so is Aria.

“It was him,” Spencer declares. “It was him all along.”

This is the thought that twists Emily’s stomach into knots at night. If they’d told someone, anyone. If Ezra had been led away in handcuffs for sleeping with an underage student. If that could have prevented everything else that came after. If Aria would have been standing there with the rest of them in the delivery room when Joy was born. If. If. If.

“It was him,” Spencer says, every time they see her. She says it over coffee. Over drinks. When they’re out running early in the morning. It’s burned into consciousness, a mantra of self-reproach.

They all feel it, more or less, even if Spencer is the only one who can’t shut up about it.

They should have known. They knew Cece was working for him. They knew he had cameras everywhere once. That he kept files on everyone. That he didn’t think laws applied to him.

“It was him,” Spencer says, over Thanksgiving dinner.

“Unless it wasn’t,” Hanna says, bitingly. She’s been drinking straight vodka since noon, has drowned all the fucks she has left to give.

Everyone at the table freezes at her words.

“It wasn’t her,” Alison says firmly, putting a restraining hand on Spencer’s arm.

“I’m just saying,” Hanna says, waving her arms emphatically. “We obviously didn’t know either of them as well as we thought.”

“She was our friend,” Emily insists, quietly.

“Well they’re gone and we’re here and one way or another it’s over!” Hanna says, her words slurring a little. “Believe whatever you want! That she didn’t know! That she didn’t choose him! Maybe they’re both innocent little lambs and the day they scampered off, a piano just happened to drop out of the sky on the real A’s head! But I’m done, Spencer! I’m done talking about it and theorizing about it and tearing myself to pieces over it!”

“It was him,” Spencer repeats, coldly. She walks out of the room and out of the house and out of Hanna’s life for good.

She tells Emily the first time she hires a private investigator. She doesn’t mention hiring the second or the third or the eighteenth.

Alison tries to discourage her from recruiting Mona to blue snarf Ezra’s brother. It’s a dead end. They’re not in touch with him either.

Spencer refuses to believe it.

She gets arrested breaking into Wesley’s apartment, spends a week in jail before Peter can grease enough palms to smooth the whole thing over. A month later she gets caught trying to infiltrate the offices of the Fitzgerald Foundation with a stolen security badge.

Mike gets married. Byron gets sick. Ella’s face is thin and haunted.

Aria never comes back. Never even calls.

Spencer hires a forensic accountant. She goes undercover at the publishing house to find out where the book royalties go. The answer is nowhere. They build up in an unused account in the Cayman Islands. Spencer flies down there, tries to pay Caleb to hack the bank’s mainframe. He calls Veronica. Veronica sends Spencer to rehab, hoping the fourth time will be the charm.

When she gets out, she’s wild eyed. She believes Charlotte is alive. She wants to go back down to the Doll House and search for clues they might have missed.

“She might be his prisoner,” Spencer says, her voice breaking. “She might be dead. He could still be playing the game with her! Torturing her! She might be married to him and never know!”

They read about Hanna’s third marriage in the tabloids. She’s divorced from both Caleb and Lucas, and Emily caught her stumbling out of a room at the Radley with Mona the last time they were supposed to meet for brunch.

Emily watches Alison tucking in the girls at night and feels grateful that all the drama, all the pain, somehow led them here. This house. This family. This steady love.

One day, she’s standing on the bed, balancing with one foot on the window sill as she tries to hang a new curtain rod. The sunlight streams in with the curtains temporarily down, glinting off something small and metallic, embedded in the fancy scrollwork above the antique dresser mirror.

She stands perfectly still, tries not to look directly at it. Continues with her curtain project and pats the duvet until the bed looks smooth and undisturbed. She calls Ali, who calls in Mona, who traces the satellite feed to a remote cottage in the south of Iceland.

It’s the best lead they’ve had in ten years.

They take Hanna’s plane.

Spencer is vibrating with nervous energy as they hike across a lava field with a compass.

There’s no one there when they reach the darkened house. It’s dusty and abandoned, but with a bank of screens still running a video feed. The DiLaurentis Fields bedroom. Spencer’s barn. Hanna’s penthouse. Mona’s townhouse. The Radley.

Spencer finds a newspaper wadded up in the fireplace that’s only six months old.

She turns to Emily, her eyes bright and shining with tears.

He’s still out there.

Maybe she is, too.

---------------------------------------

X. What Lies Beneath

Mona is dressed in a fashionable white lab coat, studying a vial of clear liquid. Leslie Stone adjusts her glasses and uses an eyedropper to draw a sample, which she drips carefully onto a litmus strip.

She studies the results carefully before turning to Mona.

“Oh my god,” Leslie mutters. “Does this mean what I think it means?”

“The Carissimi Group,” Mona observes. “They’ve been contaminating Rosewood’s water supply for years! Hallucinogens! Poppers! Bath Salts! The entire ‘A’ game is nothing but a mass hallucination!”

“But these other compounds,” Leslie says, putting some of the water onto a slide and studying it closely under the microscope. “ I’ve never even seen before. This chemical cocktail, over time, in conjunction with the mind altering serotonergics - this has the be the root cause.”

Spencer bursts into the room, flanked by Hanna, Emily, Alison, and Aria. She yanks a clipboard out of Mona’s hands and quickly scans the results.

“It’s a toxic stew,” she declares. “Phosphorus. Astatine. Rhenium. Argon. Carbon. Hydrogen. Ytterbium.”

“Speak English,” Hanna requests. “Not Chemikawhatsit.”

“Altogether, these trace elements would bond into a poisonous mucky goo,” Mona explains.

“So this is it?” Emily asks. “This is the reason for everything that’s happened to us?”

“It tracks,” Spencer declares, as she begins feverishly writing out the chemical formula on a whiteboard.

P At Re Ar C H Y

----------------------------------------

XI. Sharked

“We need to figure out who AD is,” Spencer says, spreading a diagram of the Radley on the countertop.

“It’s me,” Sara Harvey exclaims, as she bangs a gloved fist against the window. “Haven’t you learned anything? I’m behind everything in this town!”

“Did you hear something?” Emily asks.

“I don’t know what happened,” Hanna mutters. “I got so bored for a second, my eyes just glazed over.”

“I know,” Alison yawns. “But we have to solve this somehow.”

Sara storms into the house. “It’s me,” she shouts. “I’m AD! I wanted to show you all! That I’m still relevant!”

Her reveal is met by the sound of group snoring. At the sound of her voice, all the Liars have fallen asleep.

“Fine,” she snarls. “That’s just fine!”

She stomps off towards the bathroom to leave a menacing mirror message. As soon as she’s done with her shower.

---------------------------------------

XII. Normal Again

Alison is writing her name on the chalkboard.

Mrs. Rollins.

Her friends burst into the room. “It’s too late! He’s here!”

Spencer grabs Alison roughly by the shoulder and propels her out into the school hallway.

“Go!” she shouts at them. “Get her out. I’ll hold him off!”

She sees Aria’s leopard print heels careening around the corner, sees Emily grab Alison’s hand as they hurry after her. Hanna alone stops and looks back at her for a long moment before she, too, breaks into a run.

Spencer hears their footsteps echoing as they sprint at full speed towards the exit to the faculty lot. She turns to face the hooded figure moving towards her.

“Spencer!” a familiar voice calls, sounding muzzy and distant. “Spencer!”

In a white padded room at Radley Sanitarium, Spencer tears the sleeve of her hospital gown as she knocks over a metal tray of pills.

“It’s you,” she yells, frantically. “You’re A!”

“You’re safe,” Wren Kingston promises in his most patient voice. “There’s no more A.”

“I need to warn the others!” Spencer shouts. She holds her empty hands in midair and makes typing motions with her thumbs. She looks around the room, her eyes wild. “Why won’t they answer? They never answer!”

“They can’t answer,” he says, gently. “You know they can’t. Some part of you knows it. Think, Spencer. You remember. There was a fire. Thornhill Lodge burnt to the ground.” He taps the wedding ring on his finger. “Melissa barely managed to pull you out in time.”

He looks at the white burn marks that cover most of Spencer’s right arm. Thinks unwillingly of the lighter Melissa found clutched in her hand. They disposed of it, of course. Peter Hastings discreetly bribed the fire marshall for a verdict of faulty wiring.

“No,” Spencer whispers as she rocks back and forth in her chair. “No. No. No.”

Wren shakes his head and makes a notation on her chart. Every day, the same note.

Six years of the same six words.

Diganosis: Persistent dissociative state. Condition unchanged.

----------------------------------

XIII. Blow Us All Away

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Mona asks. “Because once it’s done, there’s no going back.”

Spencer looks around at her friends. “Anyone not feeling sure?” She smiles a ghost of her old smile, a sad echo from the time before.

“I’m all in,” Hanna says, raising her hand. “What about the rest of you?”

The other girls raise their hands, a look of grim determination on each of their faces.

“This is it,” Alison says. “This is how it ends.”

Mona types a code into a device she’s attached to the base of the cell tower they’re standing under. Below them, the town of Rosewood is silent and still. An electromagnetic pulse is loosed over the town, triangulated with two other towers where Caleb and Melissa are stationed.

“That’s enough to wipe out any hard drive, flash drive, cell phone, or security camera down there,” Mona announces. “The servers at the police station will be fried. The power grid is sparking.”

Any final traces of evidence about their involvement with Rollins are erased. Dust motes in the cybernetic universe. The stand together quietly, watching for the next signal.

Finally a red flare streaks across the sky, launched from Melissa’s position.

“She’s made contact with my mom,” Spencer says, relieved. “Get ready for Phase II.”

Twenty minutes later, the Pennsylvania National Guard rolls into town and starts evacuating residents per the governor’s order. With the Rosewood section of the power grid failing, no emergency services available, and rumors of a gas leak beneath the Radley - they waste no time in getting the populace out. They move house to house, knocking on doors and shuffling people into emergency buses to shuttle them to a temporary Red Cross shelter over in Ravenswood.

They watch everyone being hustled out of town with a fascinated detachment, like watching the tunnels of an ant farm.

“It’s going to be a new beginning,” Alison says firmly, seeing Emily staring out at the room of her old house.

Five hours later, the troops declare the evacuation complete and roll out, erecting road blocks around the perimeter. A flare shoots up from Caleb’s location.

“Phase Three, Motherfuckers,” Hanna says with a smirk.

The whir of a drone cuts through the darkness. It lowers itself towards the ground, hovering at waist height. Aria pulls out a package of fireworks and fastens them to the underside of the machine.

“I love you guys,” Spencer says, as they light the fuses together.

They don’t waste any time once the drone is airborne. They pile quickly into Spencer’s SUV and tear off at top speed towards the Philadelphia airport.

They see the fireball flash reflected in the rearview mirror, feel the ground shake under their wheels as the town explodes.

It’s all behind them now. The bodies. The blackmail. Sometimes the only way to win the game is to blow the entire board off the face of the earth. Leave nothing behind but a crater where the underground bunker used to be.

Jason has the Carissimi jet fueled up and waiting for them. Emily and Alison want to get married in Paris. Start fresh in a place that smells like baking bread and champagne. They’ll stay there for a few months, maybe a few years. Mona already has a space picked out for Hanna’s design studio. Aria will write a few novels. Spencer’s planning to rendezvous with Melissa in London, then head to Morocco to track down Mary Drake.

It’s time to look forward, now. Not back.

Ash from the blast rains down on their windshield.

Spencer meets Alison’s eyes in the mirror as she flips on the wipers, turns the radio up.

The "Welcome to Rosewood" sign is blackened and charred from the heat of the blast, but the red paint is still wet, still faintly visible.

The final words stenciled carefully by A's gloved hand.

Goodbye, Bitches!

There's a metallic clang as Spencer runs it over.

The ash drifts down and covers the final 'A' message.

The Liars tail lights fade into the distance.

Notes:

I can't believe it's almost over.

(Also, I do know how to correctly spell PATRIARCHY, but there's no periodic element Ri.)

#emison #pll fic #pll endgame #who is uber a #pretty little liars

[ask-thelittleheros]

MJ: I wouldn’t be so quick to judge Mr.GOBLIN. You’re looking a little green.

Harry: Wha-- I am NOT JEALOUS!

Gwen: So, wait, You don’t think he’s a little...?

MJ: What? Oh no the kid’s cuckoo for coco puffs but it’s not my place to judge his wackjobery. It’s Pete’s medical bill not mine.

#mary jane watson #Gwen Stacy #harry osborn #spider-man #drawn response

[wellthatwasaletdown]

"I know this relationship was probably over the moment Harry realized it didn’t get him the press he wanted and possibly when Olivia revealed herself to be a little bit cuckoo for coco puffs, but hey, a person can dream." I agree LOL and it's a shame, I too would love to watch the Harries deal with her as Mrs Styles. But as their great romance bombed publicly, that's a nail in the coffin for image obsessed Harry. Same as it was with Tess and others.

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