#how not to

[whereifindsanity]

#trees don't move #oooffff #gotta hurt #how not to #skiing

[bibliophilecats]

After my GP previously provided me with this gem

"Well, you don't look sick."

today he added to my collection

"I am not here to coddle my patients."

Bedside manners: 0

And he really asks my why I do not come in for check-ups but only when I am sick and need a doctor's note.

(As a side note, he told me to get in shape. When I pointed out that I was not able to keep any food or drink for the last 36 hours and barely managed to get to the doctor's office, he recounted the time he had a stomach flu and started jogging the moment he was feeling mildly better and lost 2 kg this way 🙄)

#personal #fun with the medical profession #bedside manners #how not to

[zmediaoutlet]

Writing: how not to >>> elaborate? 👀

I guess I will very briefly, if only to say this: I feel like people who primarily read fanfiction written by teenagers (even if very well-meaning teenagers) should NOT be offering writing advice to anyone who wants their writing to be... good. What we've been referring to as AO3 House Style is absolutely not the kind of writing that I want to read, ever, and so while it is (unfortunately for me) extremely popular, I'd be happy if it burned to the ground.

#answers #writing #how not to #my 'how not to' tag is small #but i stand by all of 'em #especially that dumbass jaime from got post lol #but like -- fuck off with your 'short paragraphs only' #fuck off with 'omg use words that aren't said' #fuck off with flat stupid characters who do weird ooc/unnatural things #i am feeling salty about bad writing this morning haha #and it's a drag because like -- #it *absolutely* is the crappy writing that's most popular #i don't mean like -- misspelled and obviously technically wrong #that's easy to dismiss #it's the real top-of-the-bell-curve stuff that becomes lauded #i saw the most popular wincest fics post and just wanted to lay down #but i guess that's why people won't shut up about last outpost lol #anyway. bitter reader hours.

[howto-ifyou]

How (Not) To Survive A Zombie Apocalypse:

Don’t:

Attempt to defeat the zombies in martial arts or hand to hand combat. The close proximity will increase your risk of being bitten dramatically. Remember, 6 feet apart or 6 feet under.

Try to mate with the zombies. Listen, I know you’ve been lonely since this whole apocalypse thing started, but this just isn’t a good idea. If you’re a necrophiliac willing to take your chances, well, I can’t stop you so have fun?

Try to eat the zombies. I know you’re hungry but it’s a really bad idea for many many reasons.

Sleep out in the open. Listen, I understand that you’re nodding off from all that morphine you looted from the abandoned pharmacy, but now is not the time for a nap. At least drag yourself somewhere hidden so you don’t become zombie food.

Trust the government. They probably started all this nonsense anyway. Now they’re just trying to save the world to cover everything up.

Use “anti-zombie” spray. Any product that is sold for the purposes of deterring zombies has not been proven to work nor has it been approved by the FDA.

Try to form an alliance with the zombies. Zombies are known to be traitors and will eat you if given the opportunity.

Eat rotten food. This is a bad idea as it could make you sick. Try to eat all of your perishables before they expire. It will probably be the last time you get to experience them for a while.

Taunt the zombies. I don’t care if waving a red cape in front of zombies makes you feel like a matador, it’s not smart. Insulting them or making faces at them is not recommended either.

Keep a ‘pet’ zombie. Even if it’s chained up really, really well, there’s still a chance of it breaking free and attacking you. Remember, there are no good zombies.

#how not to #survive #zombie #apocalypse #satire #shitpost

[idk-who-i-amm]

Leather Lover

Luke knew they had a problem when he saw Ashton in the dressing room and in the leather pants. How Ashton was running his hands over his thighs and fixing how they landed on his hips. He watched him buckle and unbuckle his belt a few times before pulling their eyes away to fix up his makeup. Luke looked over at Ashton through the mirror and watched him run a hand over this thigh once more before smiling at Luke.

or how not to deal with leather pants

(on ao3)

#lashton #nsft #my writing #or how not to #how not to

[whiteshipnightjar]

Zoozve, my beloved

#i cannot tell you how much this made me smile just bc it's so full of love #moon #venus #zoozve #long post #sorry about that it's very long but it's very entertaining i hope you enjoy this lil zoozve gem haha #astronomy #astrophysics #space

[daylighteclipsed]

ENTRY LEVEL MEANS NO EXPERIENCE. IT MEANS NO PORTFOLIO OF RELEVANT SAMPLES. ENTRY LEVEL IS ENTRY LEVEL

#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GAIN EXPERIENCE YOU STUPID FUCKS #I HATE THIS I HATE JOB HUNTING THIS SYSTEM IS ABSOLUTE DOG SHIT

[wizardpotions]

Christmas as a cultural icon is starting to get really dystopian in a climate sense, december has historically been a time of year in which there would be snow in a significant portion of europe and north america, and the fact that its not even icy this time of year and all the christmas songs and decorations reference a time of year that will likely never exist in the same way again in my life time is so strange.

#for reference i live in scotland so it is weird that there is no ice or snow in december anymore #shitpost #not really but its just how i find my original content #christmas #climate change

[oncorhynchus-nerka]

VERY IMPORTANT a dam in the Netherlands, the weerdsluis lock, is directly on a migratory path for spawning fish. They have a worker stationed there to open the door for the fish, but they can take a while to open it. So to keep the fish from getting preyed on by birds they installed a doorbell. Only, the fish don't have hands to ring the doorbell. If you go to their website, they have a LIVE CAMERA AND A DOORBELL that YOU RING FOR THE FISH when they're waiting, and then the dam worker opens the door for them! I can't express how obsessed I am with this. look at this shit. oh my god.

Please check on the fish doorbell once in a while :)

#self #last night i kept stimming thinking about this LOVE IS AO REAL. AUGH #i dont like damming but this is a step in the right direction AND it gets the public involved #i love that! more public interactions like this in ecology please! thats how you bring change! thats how you make ppl see the beauty in life #marine biology #ecology

[necromimetics]

can’t stop thinking about my friend’s cishet partner who said last night that he doesn’t think anyone is the same gender. god-tier take.

#sky.txt #we were talking about how some people conceptualize nonbinary as like a 3rd gender #rather than a huge spectrum of experience #and he just hit us with that

[cassassinated]

I miss the days when, no matter how slow your internet was, if you paused any video and let it buffer long enough, you could watch it uninterrupted

#spending the next week and a half with the shittiest country internet #and i cannot watch shit no matter how long i buffer

[apollos-boyfriend]

mspec gays are so cool i love you bilesbians and pangays and everything in between each and every one of you deserve the world mwuah

#icarus speaks #containment breach #help how do you add gifs to text

[ladychlo]

Motaz Azaiza interviewed by Ajstream after fleeing Gaza, please do watch the whole interview...

#he just turned 24 yo #I can't imagine how many dreams aborted by what's happening #please do watch the whole interview #motaz azaiza #free palestine #gaza

[zmediaoutlet]

The boys.. Just. Yeah. I had high expectations going into the last episode. A lot had happened leading up to that episode, and I was like cool okay how is this gonna go and then I was left being a bit like. What. The only actions that really made sense (to me) was soldier boy not wanting to go back to a cage. And then when I look back at s3 it doesn't look like a narrative. It's a few pieces. Kripke using his fave boy as a little action doll (which I do appreciate but yanno). Maybe it's just a stepping stone to s4 but yeah... A bit of a let down for me

Anonymous:

Yeah, I'll def still be watching the next season of the boys but this is the first finale (and season) they really whiffed. The sheer amount of weird bad character decisions makes me wonder if there was writer turnover? Like the show has never been perfect but at least the characters have all felt pretty consistent- this finale felt like they needed characters to be in a certain place to establish the main conflict for next season with no build-up to believably get the characters there. (cont'd)

(pt 2) Like the twist with Ryan, who has barely been in this season and is apparently now evil enough to smile when Homelander brutally murders a dude in front of him. It doesn’t work with the sheltered kid vibe we’ve gotten from him for the past two seasons. If they wanted to focus on a toxic evil father-son duo next season they should have just kept Soldier Boy around, someone who could at least shake up the status quo and be a threat to Homelander without necessarily wanting to kill him.

Combining these into one answer:

"It doesn't look like a narrative" and "no build-up to believably get the characters there" are both really good summaries of whatever the hell happened in s3.

Structurally and logically, the whole thing was an absolute mess. I've thought of like six ways to fix it but I find it bizarre how much of a fail it is on just a basic thinking level. Apparently they had some Covid restriction issues and some actors who became unavailable, etc, which I guess would cause problems. And anon, to your point about wondering if there was writer turnover -- I wondered that too, although my bigger question is why the showrunner isn't enforcing some kind of throughline in the writer's room. Like. It isn't hard to quickly and effectively come up with good characterful solutions to problems, especially when so many of them could be done with relatively quick setups. On greenscreen, even.

It really did feel, though, like they only came up with what the story was actually about like halfway through, which is a goofy writing choice on par with someone posting chapters of their big bang and only 20k in going 'oh wait, *this* is the main pairing!' For the The Boys Season Three: Cycles of Abuse, we really started off with just fumbling and tedious moving of setpieces and no real... focus.

It is instructive, though, as far as writing is concerned. You've got the plot you want to work through and the characterization beats you want to hit: how are you going to show the reader/viewer the things they should be taking away from it and feeling?

It's wild to me how much of the season would have been entirely reframed if they'd started with a flashback of SB's coldly emotionally abusive father talking shit to young Ben, instead of the splashy doofy exploding penis. Cheaper, too. Think of how we'd have an emotional framework through which to see character behavior and choices; think of how that would set up Butcher and then Homelander's interactions with Ryan, and how we see who children choose to trust and the sort of people they'll become as a result.

Am I a fool for expecting more from the show that was always going to choose the exploding penis? Maybe. But I get very annoyed when millions of dollars are dumped into something that could have been great, and the writing --- the part you get to spend the most time on, the part that should be clearest and best --- lets it down so hard. #BeBetter.

#still can't believe they wasted so much time on that musical scene #but i guess karen f. wanted something to do? #and it was... cute #but when you've got 8 episodes #that are structured *this* badly #it really felt like a writerly slap in the face lol #answers #the boys #writing #how not to

[ankle-beez]

nimona (film that was saved by netflix after disney canned it along with closing the studio that was making it) and the boy and the heron (2d animated movie, the type that disney doesn't make anymore due to "limitations with the medium") getting animated feature noms at the oscars this year and not wish... bro that's funny

#nimona #the boy and the heron #wish #disney wish #wish 2023 #how do you live #angel.post

[lucidloving]

@roach-works // Melissa Broder, "Problem Area" // Mary Oliver, "The Return" // @annavonsyfert // Koyoharu Gotouge, Demon Slayer // Haruki Murakami, Dance Dance Dance // David Levithan, How They Met and Other Stories // Tennessee Williams, Notebooks

#theme: saving yourself #my favourite thing about myself is how i always pick myself back up #and make things better #again and again #web weaving #webs #poetry #aesthetic #prose #prose poetry #art #collage #literature #books #book quotes #novels #novel quotes #poems #quotes #words #positivity