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#hozier fanfiction
padfootagain · 2 days
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Only An Almost (V)
Chapter 5: Doubting
Hello!! Here comes a new chapter! There are mentions of sex in this chapter, so a little reminder that this series is not meant to be read by minors. Thank you!
I hope you’ll like this chapter! Please, tell me what you think!
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Pairing: Hozier x fem!reader, friends with benefits AU
Warning: No explicit smut or nsfw content, but there are sexual themes and heavy make-out sessions (it’s a friends with benefits AU, I can’t really escape it), so 18+ only!
Summary: Andrew has been in love with you for years, and yet he has never confessed his feelings. But a night out celebrating the engagement of his best friend changes everything. However, you don't seem ready to be with him just yet. You make him an offer that he can't refuse... but will certainly regret.
Word Count : 2435
Masterlist for the series – Hozier’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist
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Three weeks passed. You had spent twelve nights together.
Now, Andrew knew every detail of your face as you reached orgasm, the beauty spot on your back he loved kissing, the perfect place across your neck to kiss and nip that made you squirm in his arms, the way the most intimate parts of you tasted, how your legs shook when his fingers touched that spot, how you smelled when he held you close after you were both content and happily floating above the room. He knew you liked to hold his hand right after sex, that you loved when he stroked your back or your cheek to help you ease down into the mortal world, that you took your showers way too hot, that you didn’t like when his beard brushed that part of your ribs because it tickled too much. He had mapped every inch of your body with his eyes, his fingers, his lips, his tongue. He knew how to pleasure you precisely by now, how to read through your breathing what you needed him to do to feel as good as possible, how to worship your body the way you deserved.
And judging by your gestures, you had spotted too that he adored when you kissed his collarbone and his chest. That he had a weak spot at the base of his neck, that he was ticklish right behind his knee, that he melted whenever you dragged your fingertips across his spine, and you tugged on his hair the perfect way nor too harsh nor too soft but the ideal strength that turned him on to no end. You had touched and kissed all of him too by now.
Despite this new intimacy, despite the tenderness with which you held him in your arms as he struggled to find back his breathing, the way you whispered his name in pleasure as if in a prayer, the way you showered him in gentle touches and kisses… you still acted the same as always outside the bedroom.
You talked the same, stood next to him at a perfectly respectable distance, asked him about his day and his mom and his bees the way you had always done, as if… as if there was nothing abnormal. As if he had not heard you shout his name in pleasure the night before. As if you could truly spend nights making love to him and act like nothing had changed, when… everything had changed.
Perhaps he just needed to be patient. You would come around. You would love him, eventually. Besides, he was probably not even the problem at all! You had told him that you didn’t want a relationship, with anyone. The fact that you were still sleeping with him showed that you liked him enough to blur that boundary, despite your decision. Yeah, it was an encouraging sign. If he just… if he just waited, and if he made efforts to make you happy and…
“Andy? You’re alright?”
“Hmmm?”
“You’re okay?”
He blinked back at you. You had put on an old t-shirt again to cover yourself, but he had nothing on. He felt naked, vulnerable, self-conscious. He drew the covers higher across his chest.
“You want some coffee before leaving? It’s pretty late,” you offered, and if there was kindness in the offer, it still broke his heart.
“I… I don’t know. I’m not sure I can drive,” he answered earnestly.
“You can sleep in the guest room, if you want.”
He looked away to hide the tears that gathered in his eyes.
He was inside you ten minutes ago, he had tasted you, touched you, made you unravel under him several times this evening… and all you could give him was the guest bedroom?
It wasn’t just heartbreak, he realized. It was more vicious than that. You made him feel terrible about himself. Did he not mean more to you than that? You could let him do all these things to you… but you couldn’t fall asleep in the same bed? Really?
“No, no, no… it’s okay, I can drive.”
“It’s late, stay the night. You’ll leave tomorrow morning.”
“I’m fine.”
“It’s dangerous, Andy.”
“I said I’m fine.”
You frowned at the harshness of his tone.
“What’s wrong? Did I… Did I do something wrong while we were…”
You left your sentence suspended in mid-air, as if you couldn’t say it. Couldn’t say that you had just had sex with him. What the fuck was wrong with you?
“Sex was amazing, that’s not the problem.”
“What’s the problem, then?”
You seemed to truly have no clue. You seemed genuinely concerned, worried even. Like you cared. Like you cared so fucking much for him. And yet, he was worthy of a moment of pleasure, and the guest bedroom…
“Nothing, I’m sorry. I’m not tired enough to stay, don’t worry. I can drive home.”
“Can you text me, then, when you’re home?”
“Don’t worry…”
“It’s two in the morning, of course I worry.”
He didn’t argue, merely nodded.
He gathered his clothes, got dressed, left without trying to kiss you, he knew you wouldn’t let him.
No kissing without sex.
He was about to fall asleep after mere minutes behind the wheel, so he stopped on the first parking spot he saw. He waited for a plausible time, and texted you.
I’m home.
Your answer buzzed in his pocket right when he was about to fall asleep.
Good to hear. Sleep well, Andy. Xx
He couldn’t keep on doing this for long. Making love to you, and then feeling like shit about himself because you couldn’t bother letting him fall asleep in your bed. Or hold you close. Or kiss you before leaving.
He closed his eyes, unable to decide on what to do next. Should he just call it quits, already? Stop everything and save himself from suffering… but he would stop having you like this too…
His breathing deepened as he finally surrendered.
Sleep well, Andy…
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Rugby night at the pub had turned into Sam freaking out about his wedding, and Andrew taking notes about things he needed to help planning.
Luckily, there was no touring planned, no album to be released before the wedding. He had some charity work to be done, Mavis had called for a concert and he couldn’t refuse the woman anything… all in all, there wasn’t to come. Workwise, Andrew was in a writing phase, shutting himself up into his house for hours was most of what would happen in the coming months. He could help to plan the wedding, he had time for it. And considering the level of stress Sam was under, Andrew’s help wouldn’t be too much…
“Daphne started to mention appetizers yesterday… there are like… so many of these… How am I supposed to choose that? I didn’t fucking know there could be so many appetizers?!”
“Sam, calm down, for Christ’s sake! You’re this far from having a stroke.”
“Easy for you to say, Andy! You’re not the one getting married!”
“You have five months, Sam… Five months. There is plenty of time for you to choose your appetizers.”
“Add it to the list. How many things do we have to plan?”
“Hmmm… I think I’m up to twenty…eight. Twenty-eight things.”
“God… why did I ask Daphne to marry me…”
Andrew opened his mouth to offer a joke, but Sam shushed him with a raised finger.
“Rhetorical question. Don’t.”
“Come on, relax, Sam. You’ll be perfectly fine. Everyone else manages to plan a wedding, you can too.”
“Not everyone else… don’t you remember the fiasco that my uncle’s wedding was?”
“I sang at that wedding!”
“That was the only decent part in the entire day.”
“Thanks, Sam.”
“You were seventeen, don’t get ahead of yourself, you were still pretty shite.”
“Ha, there you go. I thought someone had replaced you with some weird doppelgänger stuff. Or a clone, even.”
“Android?”
“Or organic.”
“Did I grow in a tube?”
“Yeah… with the disgusting liquid.”
“Nice…”
The two friends exchanged a smile.
“Please, stop being so worried. Your wedding will be amazing. Besides… who cares about appetizers? The important part is you marrying the love of your life.”
“I know that this comes from a very romantic point of view, but that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You’ve met my mom. God, you’ve met Daphne’s mom… anything goes wrong, it’ll be the bloody apocalypse!”
“We’ll find your body somewhere in Wicklow…”
“In the bog.”
“Tragic. I can see the headlines already…”
“I’m sure you’ll have a lovely speech for my funerals, though.”
“Absolutely not. I’ll reveal my true feelings about you, gobshite.”
Sam couldn’t keep the act up any longer, and both him and Andrew exploded with laughter.
“I’m picturing your mother just… shouting at you about appetizers,” Andrew laughed, choking and tears pearling at the corners of his eyes as he doubled over.
Sam was barely breathing at this point, throwing his entire body backwards against the chair.
It took the two of them a moment to calm down. When he looked at his friend again, Sam’s gaze was full of fondness.
“I’m sorry to bother you about that while we could be watching rugby with the rest of the lads.”
“It’s alright. You’re stressed. Besides, I don’t have a real job, plenty of time on my hands to handle your nervous breakdowns.”
“True! You parasite.”
“Absolute junk of our society.”
“Nothing productive coming from you, that’s for sure.”
“I shout very loudly though, it ought to be worth something.”
“Well, apparently, it’s worth millions.”
“Do you want me to shout at your wedding?”
Sam’s lips curled into a smile.
“Aren’t you too expensive for a poor lad like me.”
“Undoubtedly. But if you promise to quit freaking out about appetizers, I might yield.”
“It would be amazing. Thank you, Andy. I’d love for you to sing. Actually, we’ve been talking about it with Daphne… could you do Work Song for our first dance?”
“It would be an honour. Of course, I can.”
“We were hesitating with Cherry Wine…”
“Don’t do this to me, Sam.”
They both exploded with laughter again.
“Don’t do this to me. I will never understand…”
“Don’t people just… listen to the lyrics?” nodded Sam.
“I don’t know, man…” Andrew heaved a sigh. “Sometimes they just kill me.”
His phone buzzed, and there was your name on it. Printed there in the pixels. He didn’t check your text, even though he wanted to.
“Andy?”
“Hmm?”
“What’s going on between you and Y/N?”
Andrew averted his gaze, drank some of his beer. On the screen at the back of the pub, Ireland was earning three points with penalty kick. People were shouting, and it was loud and merry.
“What do you mean? Nothing’s going on,” Andrew answered, a terrible liar.
“You’ve been weird.”
“I’m always weird.”
“True, but not the usual weird. You’re not on the ‘I love her and I’m too much of a fool to tell her’ kind of weird, you’re on a ‘I feel like shite’ kind of weird.”
“Both miserable situations…”
“True. But then, you’re a moron, it doesn’t help.”
“Thanks for the compliment.”
Andrew heaved a sigh.
“I can’t tell you about it. She asked me not to tell you about it.”
“So… something did happen between you and Y/N.”
There was a pregnant pause.
“You can’t tell anyone about this, Sam. I’m serious.”
“Of course, I promise.”
“Not even Daphne.”
“Don’t push it. There are no secrets between us.”
“Sam… please… it’s not your secret, it’s mine.”
He heaved a sigh, but Sam nodded anyway.
“What’s wrong then?”
Andrew struggled to swallow when he lifted his glass of Guiness up to his lips.
“Y/N and I, we… we’ve slept together.”
Sam’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline.
“What?! But… that’s amazing!”
“Is it?”
“Why wouldn’t it be?” retorted Sam, taken-aback.
Andrew heaved a painful sigh and rubbed his eyes.
“Because she doesn’t want to be in a relationship.”
“Oh.”
“So, we’ve agreed on some kind of… friends with benefits situation. And I… I’m starting to regret it.”
“You bet. Damn… why the fuck would you agree to something like that, though? You’re crazy about the woman!”
“I know, I know… I thought… I thought that she would… I don’t know what I thought. It was that or nothing, and I guess I imagined that having a part of her was better than not having her at all. I was wrong. This is fucking killing me.”
Andrew buried his head in his hands.
“What the fuck did I do, Sam? What did I do? And what the fuck do I do now?”
“Do you want this to go on?”
Andrew shook his head no, face still in his palms.
“Then, tell her you want it to stop.”
“I don’t want this to stop. I don’t want… not to have her. I want to date her.”
“Tell her that then.”
“She explicitly told me that she didn’t want to date anyone. If I say that, she’ll just… leave. She won’t say yes.”
“You need to speak to her. It won’t end well for you, Andy. What if she feels the same?”
“I’ll wait for her,” Andrew answered without a hesitation. “I’ll wait as long as she needs.”
“Then tell her that.”
But Andrew blinked back some tears as he painfully rubbed at his palms.
“What if she doesn’t feel the same?  What then?”
“Then… you’ll move on. It will only mean that she isn’t the one.”
Andrew slowly nodded, resting his chin in his palm and his elbow on the table, but he didn’t seem convinced, and indeed, he wasn’t. What if he lost you for good then? What if you never wanted to see him again? Was it worth it?
“You’re going to do something stupid, I can feel it,” Sam sighed with a shake of his head.
“No…”
“You’re going to ignore my advice.”
“No, I… I’m weighing the pros and the cons.”
“And?”
“And I agree that I can’t handle my relationship with Y/N being just about sex. But I am also terrified at the thought that she will reject me for good. Cause I… I don’t think I could still be her friend. Not after… knowing her that way.”
“Can I be brutally honest?”
“As if you aren’t always…”
“You’ve seriously fucked up accepting this situation with her…”
“Don’t I know it.”
Sam stared at his friend for a moment.
“You really do love her, don’t you?”
Andrew settled an empty stare on his beer.
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m afraid I do.”
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m00nlight-ramblings · 1 month
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Talk
As a famous singer, you find yourself at the same terrible party as Hozier, but you two decide to do something about it.
Pairing: fem reader x Hozier
Warnings: smut, dirty talk, p in v (protected) sex, fingering, 18+ MINORS DNI
Word Count: 3.2k
A/N: THANK YOU SO MUCH to everyone who waited for this one...I'm so sorry it took so long. Please enjoy, and remember, my inbox is open for requests!
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This party sucked.
Somehow, at one of the biggest album release parties of the year, you found yourself bored out of your mind, sipping on a weak gin and tonic. Leaning against a corner wall, the bass of the music from the DJ vibrated through you as you watched other people dance – your bandmates were somewhere amongst them, but for whatever reason, you just weren’t feeling it. Maybe you were just in a mood, maybe it was the music (one good song for every ten awful ones), but you sipped your drink, checking your phone every so often until it became a polite time to excuse yourself. You could already taste the revelry of getting back to your house before midnight – pajamas, Thai takeout, and scrolling aimlessly on your phone while Grey’s Anatomy reruns played in the background.
Suddenly, you saw a head bobbing around the others in the crowd – standing what seemed like almost a full foot above everyone else, his thick, curly hair pulled back in a half bun, he smiled and tilted his head to the music distractedly. Your breath hitched for a moment as you saw him – you had seen Hozier at countless red carpets and events in the past year it seemed, but he was also more handsome than the last time. He turned his head and your eyes locked, making you blush, and making him smile. He gently pressed a hand on someone’s back to alert that he was making his way behind him.
As if the giant could ever go unnoticed.
“Hi,” He said as he landed next to you, sipping from his drink. Something brown and in a rocks glass, one giant ice cube anchoring the liquid.
Of course.
“I feel like I needed to come over and speak to you – we seem to orbit each other at basically every red carpet this year.” He spoke, seemingly reading my mind. You smiled.
“That’s funny – I was just thinking that.”
Hozier nodded and his eyes scanned the crowd before landing back at you. It was like he was staring into your soul. Extending a hand, he smiled, “It’s nice to finally meet you. I’m –”
“I know who you are,” You admitted, somewhat bashfully as you shook his hand. “I’m a big fan. I’m–”
“I know who you are,” He echoed, a smirk playing on his lips mischievously, “I’m a big fan.”
You could feel your blush deepen as his smooth words washed over you. His accent was enough for you to want to drop your panties, and his smile was already sending your head upside down.
“Your ‘Best New Artist’ win was well deserved,” He continued. “Your album was one of my favorites this year. Selfishly, I hope you guys are working on another one.”
“Wow, thank you,” You breathed, your heart thumping in your chest, “That means a lot coming from one of like, the best lyricists of our generation.”
“Ah,” Hozier waved his hand, bashful, “Come now.”
You cocked an eyebrow and smiled, “You’re going to write something like ‘I'd be the voice that urged Orpheus when her body was found, I'd be the choiceless hope in grief, that drove him underground’ and not expect to be considered that?”
He simply shrugged and sipped his drink. He was blushing, embarrassed.
“This album was also very good,” He changed the subject, speaking of the current album release party. He cleared his throat, “Even though this party sucks.”
You laughed and gently grabbed his forearm in agreement, “Yes! What is that about?!”
“I think it’s the DJ,” He admitted, leaning into you, “The guys releasing this album are buddies of mine, but I’m starting to think if I need to end our friendship based on the DJ they picked for this party.”
“The music he’s playing is making me feel old,” You admitted, “I don’t know any of the songs, and I don’t seem to really like it, either. Is this what our parents feel like when we were listening to Good Charlotte and Britney Spears?”
“Not mine. My mom loves Good Charlotte.” His eyes twinkled.
You laughed. Your eyes fell on your bandmates dancing to the music, obviously drunk off of the expensive beer being served at the open bar. You were acutely aware of Hozier standing next to you, his heat seemingly radiating.
“Is it an inappropriate time to tell you that I think you look beautiful tonight?” He asked, his breath warm on your ear as he leaned down to whisper it. Shivers were sent down your back as he spoke. You turned your head and looked at him, trying to play it cool with the smile that played on your lips.
“Probably not, considering how I’ve been thinking about how handsome you look since I saw you from across the room tonight.” You retorted, titling your head. He smiled and nodded, his eyes scanning the crowd.
“I’m reminded of your beauty every time I see you at events,” Hozier said, his hand finding the small of your back, “And, admittedly, every time I scroll your Instagram feed.”
You laughed, “Hozier is my internet stalker, eh?”
“Can you blame me? That number you had on at the Grammy’s this year?” He made a face, whistling, “It took every ounce of strength not to follow your account as soon as you were done presenting on stage.”
“Do you want to get out of here?” You asked, almost interrupting him. He seemed taken aback, so you tried to backtrack, “I mean…in a bit. We could go somewhere where…the DJ doesn’t suck? After we finish our drinks.”
Hozier quickly chucked back the rest of his drink, putting the glass on the nearest table. “Let’s go.” He took your hand as you chugged the rest of yours as well, finding the spot next to his glass for yours.
He guided you through the party, his hand never leaving the small of your back. You felt heat rushing through you as you made your way to front door, and Hozier handed the valet his ticket. He turned to you.
“Did you drive here?”
You shook your head. “Car service.”
“Great. We can take my car then.”
As the valet pulled up in a sleek Audi, Hozier thanked him and handed him a large bill as a tip. He waited until you were situated in your seat before he slid into the driver’s side, closing his door and pulling into traffic. Some sort of blues-y jazz was coming through the speakers softly.
“So where are you kidnapping me to, Mr. Internet Stalker?” You teased, looking out the window at the lights of downtown L.A.
He smiled, “My hotel,” His voice was a low purr. You exchanged a glance as he leaned his head forward, in explanation, “The bar there is really nice. Live jazz band tonight. It’s mellow.”
You nodded and smiled. As your heart raced, you were trying to calm yourself down, fiddling with the clasp on the purse in your lap. Hozier’s arm was resting on the console in between you, and every so often, his hand inched closer to you. By the time he pulled into the swanky hotel parking lot, his large hand was resting gently on your thigh.
Your stomach was in excited knots.
After another valet exchange, Hozier took your hand and led you inside the hotel. It was grand and beautiful – a $500/night type place. To the right of the entrance was a beautiful restaurant, speakeasy in style. As promised, a four-piece band was set up in the corner of the bar, playing soft tunes and creating the atmosphere of an underground jazz club.
“Told you,” Hozier said, raising his eyebrows playfully, “And the drinks are great as well. Had one before the release party.”
“It’s really nice.” You awkwardly agreed. Hozier stopped for a moment, his face unreadable. He stood before you.
“I also have a minibar upstairs in my room, if you want something to drink.”
“Oh, that sounds much better.” The coil in your belly was itching to be sated, and you didn’t know how much you could play this cat-and-mouse game of will they/won’t they. For a moment, a darkness of lust flickered in his eyes, but he simply smiled and took your hand, leading you to the elevator. He scanned his room card and pressed the button to the top floor.
The air in the elevator was thick, heavy. You both stood facing the door, saying nothing. As the doors open and he led you to his suite, your heartbeat doubled in time. Flicking the lights on, he shut the door behind you, placing the lock in it’s place.
It took all of 30 seconds before your bodies crashed together, teeth clacking and moans erupting.
Hozier grabbed you and pushed your floor length dress up so they he was able to wrap your legs around his waist as he carried you to the bed. Your arms snaked around his neck, fingers finding their way into his hair. You pulled back slightly, your breath ragged already.
“So what the fuck do I call you?” You asked, breathlessly.
Confused, he looked at you, “What?”
“I need to know what I’m saying when I scream your name later…is it Hozier, or is it Andrew?”
He barked out a laugh and bit your lip, “Andrew. Andrew is fine.” He pressed his lips on yours again, dropping on top of you as he guided you to the bed. His large hands ran their way up and down your waist, palming at the skin on your body. He was moaning, grunting into the kiss, as your tongues danced together. You felt his hands leave your waist and slip your heels off, your toes already curling.
Andrew pulled away and slipped off the tweed suit jacket he was wearing. He looked down at you as he shook his head, a smile playing on his lips.
“So fucking beautiful,” He murmured, pressing hot kisses down your neck. “So fucking sexy. Every time I see you.”
You moaned and pressed your hips to him slightly, causing him to gasp lightly in surprise. He kissed down your neck, to your collarbone, gently slipping the thin straps of your dress off of your shoulders. Licking a stripe from your neck to just above your breasts, he smiled, looking at you.
“Fuck,” You breathed, looking down at him. You watched as he stood, slipping off his shoes and socks next to the bed. He unbuttoned his dress shirt and slipped that off, revealing his thin, hairy chest. He was lean, built lithly but strong. Biting your lip, you stifled a moan. He was on you once again, pulling you into a kiss, his hand cradling the back of your neck. His other hand made quick work of the zipper on the back of your dress, and he shimmed it down, before sliding it off of you completely.
Revealing the intricate…shapewear…you wore underneath.
For a moment, both of you stopped breathing, looking down at the ugly, functional corset that covered your body. Embarrassed, you pressed your lips together before looking back at Andrew. Suddenly, both of you were in hysterics.
“I really wish I was wearing some sexy lingerie right about now.” You said, throwing your head back and cackling. Andrew laughed and peppered kisses on your cheeks, shaking his head as he undid the shapewear and took that off as well.
“That was brilliant,” He said, wiping a tear away from laughing, “What a fuckin’ reveal.” As he took it off, you were completely nude, your skin softly pressed against his fingers. He groaned as he took you in, “That’s much better.” His voice was back to husky, low.
He kissed you once more before his fingers found their way to your clit, spreading your legs gently. He didn’t take his eyes off of you as his fingers felt your wetness. Quickly, he inserted two fingers, pushing his long digits all the way in. You moaned and furrowed your brow as he didn’t move for a moment, letting you adjust.
“You’re so wet for me already, darlin’.” He purred, his forehead on yours. You whimpered and nodded. He started to pump inside of you, his thumb rubbing circles on your clit. Immediately you started to squirm, which made me smile.
“Jesus Christ, Andrew.” You said, your eyes flickering to his fingers moving in and out of you. Heat rose in you as you watched him, the pleasure evident on his face as he licked his lips. When your eyes found his again, you found him looking at you, and not his handiwork.
“I love seeing you like this,” He said plainly, “You’re so beautiful when you squirm.”
He increased his speed, causing you to buck your hips. He nodded, his eyes twinkling, as he continued to pleasure you with his fingers. He leaned down to kiss you – a hot, open-mouthed kiss, with his tongue finding yours immediately. You moaned into it as he curved his fingers inside of you and took your bottom lip in his mouth, sucking gently. Pulling away, he dipped his head and moved his tongue to your hardened nipple, sucking on the bud as your body started to convulse under him.
The coil in your belly was tightening, and fast. Your hips started to buck faster, your wetness pooling out on to his fingers. You started to repeat his name like a prayer, and as you moved closer to the edge, your hand found its way into his hair again, tugging lightly.
“I’m close.” You whimpered.
“I know,” He smiled, moving his mouth to your ear, “Come for me. Be a good girl.”
You gasped slightly at his words as the coil snapped, bucking your hips one last time before your orgasm sent waves of pleasure through you. You moaned loudly, gripping the back of his head tightly as he bit down on your earlobe, never stopping his fingers inside of you.
“That’s it,” He groaned, his voice raspy, “That’s it, pretty girl. Give it all to me. Show me how pretty you are when you come for me.”
Your head swam and your heart raced, your eyes squeezed shut because you could focus. The pleasure that was spreading through you was warm, electric – it was one of the best orgasms you had ever had, and it was only with his fingers.
Jesus Fuckin’ Christ.
After a few moments, Andrew slipped his fingers out, causing you to open your eyes, your breath coming in heaving pants. He was smiling, obviously proud. Slowly, he licked his digits as he stood, moaning.
“Jesus, you taste delicious.” He said, looking at you. He undid the button and zipper on his pants, the obvious tent of his arousal very evident before he slipped them off. Down came his pants and boxer briefs, his large member springing free, wet with precum. He made his way over to a duffle bag thrown on a chair in the corner of the room and rifled through it, finally emerging with a condom in between his fingers. Opening it quickly, he slid it on himself, pumping himself a few times as he walked back to the bed, his eyes never leaving yours.
“Are you ready?” He asked, straddling himself in front of you, continue to stroke himself.
“Actually, if you’re not inside of me within the next few seconds I might lose my fucking mind.” You said, watching him. It was silly, but seeing him touch himself in front of you like that made him seem like a god. He smiled and crawled on top of you, slowly positioning himself at your entrance. As his tip teased your wet folds, you whimpered.
Finally, Andrew slid himself inside of you in a single thrust, his forehead finding yours again. Your moans filled the room, and as he started to pump inside of you, the familiar numb feeling of being filled spread throughout you.
“So good,” You said, closing your eyes and pressing your head to the pillow, “So, so good, Andrew.”
“That’s it,” He said, his breath hitching, “Wanna make you feel good. You make my cock feel so good.” He dipped his head in the crook of your neck as he started to slowly increase his pace, finding himself deeper inside of you. The sound of your wet skin slapping together filled the room, matched only by your breathy groans and his primal grunts.
“Fuck!” You shrieked, Andrew finding a particular spot that made your vision fuzzy. Andrew tilted his head up to look at you and he smiled.
“Yeah? Right there, darlin’?” He asked. You nodded, your brows knitted together. His hand found your chin, holding it roughly, “You like it when I fuck you right there?” You nodded again but he shook his head, “Lemme hear you say it, baby.” He gently commanded.
“Fuck. Yes, Andrew, right there!” You said, unable to take your eyes off of him. His eyes darkened as he continued to fuck you, his face flushing.
“My name sounds so good on your lips.” He groaned, continuing to pump in you. Sweat was beading on his forehead as he continued to hit your spot. His hand moved from your chin to your tits, and as he pinched your hardened nipples, you moaned. His thrusts became erratic, irregular.
“You’re close already, aren’t you?” You toyed with him, taking a moment to bite down on his bottom lip, “My pussy so good you’re gonna come for me?”
“Fuck,” He barked, furrowing his brows, “You’re so fucking tight…you’re so wet…I’m gonna come soon. I’m close,” His face flushed deeper as he stared into your eyes, making your heart thunder in your chest. Suddenly, he squeezed his eyes shut, his head thrown back, voice parted in a silent moan.
You felt his cock twitch inside of you, the condom filling with his orgasm. He jerked his hips, almost a spasm, as he moaned your name. His hands gripped the pillows on either side of you, his biceps flexing. You smiled as he finally opened his eyes, almost in submission as he rode out his orgasm. Your hands found their way to his back, gripping him and bringing him closer.
A few moments went by as he stayed inside of you, trying to catch up with his breathing. He placed gentle kisses on your cheek lazily, finally rolling out of you. Standing, he quickly made his way to the bathroom to toss the condom and clean himself up, but laid next to you again, scooping you up in his arms.
“You’re fucking incredible.” He murmured in your ear, his Irish accent coming out with his tired demeanor. You giggled and looked at him, brushing a sweaty lock of hair behind his ear.
“I’m really glad that party sucked so bad,” You said. He chuckled, his eyes still closed. Opening one, he looked down at you.
“Me too…” He paused for a moment, drawing you closer, “Though, even if that party was fun, I still would’ve made my way over to you.”
“Yeah?”
Andrew nodded and shifted so he was propping himself up on his elbow, “Yeah. I had been trying to muster up the courage for like…three awards shows to come over and say hi to you, now. Months worth of time.” He was somewhat bashful. You blushed.
“Well I’m glad you did.”
“Me too.” He reached out and started to brush his fingers through your hair, and you couldn’t help the fluttering in your chest.
That party sucked. But you were glad it did.
---
A/N: I'm actually kind of obsessed with their banter and relationship...should I make this multiple parts?! I was originally only planning on doing this as a oneshot but I kind love them (teehee).
As always, comments and reblogs mean a lot if you liked this one <3 Thanks for reading
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beat-the-morning · 3 months
Text
AFTER-CONCERT FEAST
Rating: +18
Relationships: Hozier/Reader
Contents: no y/n, oral sex (f! recieving), cunnilingus, vaginal fingering, dry humping, accidental orgasm, (by this I mean he starts mindlessly humping the couch
Word count: 1.7k
SUMMARY: After Hozier, your boyfriend, calls you backstage after a concert he eats you out like a starving man and cums after mindlessly dry humping the couch while doing so.
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Fic under the cut💜
The concert had ended, and you were making your way backstage with a security guard in front of you. Andrew, your boyfriend, had sent them to get you, and your mind couldn't stop racing with how he’d looked at you while he sang. How his eyes lit up when he saw you in the crowd, the little smile that escaped him, that verse he messed up on when you winked at him. You could have sworn that he didn’t take his eyes off you for the rest of the concert once he noticed you.
“Here,” the security guard said, opening the door to Andrew’s dressing room. You smiled at them and nodded as a thank you before stepping in. He was waiting for you, leaning on the vanity with his arms crossed over his chest.
“Close the door, it’s fine.” He told the security guard, the door closed behind you and you smiled. He practically bounced off the vanity and onto you with how fast he took you into his arms and lifted you off the floor in a spinning hug. “What are you doing here?” He asked as he finally lowered you from his embrace.
“Came to see you,” you answered with a grin.
Andrew chuckled, then started kissing your face with every pause he took from speaking. “Yes, but why? Weren’t you visiting your parents this week?”
“Yes, but you having a concert in the same city distracted me a little.” You giggled, his beard tickling you.
“Oh, forgot your parents lived here,” he looked down at you with loving eyes that turned to confusion the second he realised what you had done. “Wait, so you bought a ticket, queued for God knows how long-”
“Twelve hours.” You interrupted him
“Twelve hours?” His eyes widened at that fact. “You did that, when you could've called me and gotten in faster and also seen me before the concert?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“I wanted to surprise you!” You smiled. “And I wanted to see if you'd notice me in the crowd.”
“Well I did, couldn't take my eyes off you,” he kissed your lips.
“I know,” you kissed back. “There's going to be a million tiktoks asking who you were looking at.”
“I don't-” he stopped his sentence halfway through once he saw your shirt. “Are you wearing my shirt?” He asked, raising an eyebrow and smirking, he already knew the answer.
“No.” You lied, as it was, in fact, his shirt that he had accidentally left at your house the last time he saw you.
“You definitely are.”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” you teased, he rested a hand on your hip, his thumb making small circles on your skin.
“I’m sure you don’t.” His other hand rested on your cheek, caressing it gently.
Then he kissed you again, not letting go this time, you got on your tip-toes and wrapped your arms around his neck. He lowered himself lightly and bit your lower lip, you moaned in response. He broke the kiss and guided you to the couch where he pulled you onto his lap so that you were straddling him. You kissed him again, more passionate this time, almost hungrily, his hands explored the skin under your shirt, revelling in your warmth.
You explored each other's mouths, delighting in the taste you had so missed, the way his beard scratched your face felt like heaven, his hands travelled to your hips and ground you against him, you could feel his hardening cock rubbing against you and he could hear your whimpers every time your clit got the slightest bit of friction. He slowly lifted you up and changed the pose you were both in, setting you on the couch, and taking off your shirt and bra, promptly discarding them on the floor next to him.
Andrew's lips left your mouth and moved down from your jawline to your waistband, leaving bites and hickeys on his way, he was giving you goosebumps with the way he caressed your body so lovingly, worshipping every curve, every mole and little imperfection, as you called them, seemed like gold in his eyes, like beautiful stars in a sky only he could see. Once at your hips, he looked up at you with lustful eyes, “I need to taste you, so fucking badly,” he whispered, “but I need you to be quiet, can you do that for me, baby?”
“You know the answer to that,” you answered with a grin, already kicking off your shoes.
“Yeah, I do,” he smiled back, quickly kissing you one last time before he unzipped your shorts and pulled them off completely along with your panties, throwing them to the floor as soon as they were off you, joining the rest of your clothing. He kissed his way up your thighs, resting your legs on his shoulders. He looked up at you with his beautiful green eyes, pupils dilated to a point where they looked black, silently begging you to give him the final go-ahead before he lost himself in you.
You nodded, he smiled.
He dove into you like a starving man having his first meal in weeks, lapping up your juices and drinking you. You arched your back in pleasure. He licked from your entrance up to your clit, pressing his tongue to it just to flick it right after, you bit your lip in an attempt to quiet down, but it barely worked. His tongue worked at you expertly, he knew exactly what to do to make you squirm under his touch. His tongue travelled down from your clit to your entrance, where he lost himself and moaned just with your taste. Your breathing hitched at the sight of him eating you out, completely enamoured with his eyes closed. He was moaning as he fucked you with his tongue. As his nose rubbed on your clit just right, you thanked God for giving him a big one.
You moved his long curls out of his face, he looked up at you. Your breathing stopped for a second as he rubbed his nose against your clit while smiling into your cunt, in blinding lust you grabbed a fistful of his hair and started grinding your hips against his face. You could've sworn you heard him chuckle. The way he was holding onto your hips was sure to leave bruises later on, you didn't care one bit, you were too focused looking into his eyes and the way they were full of lust and admiration for you. How he kept eating you out even as you held his head in place and basically used him.
He was so hard it was starting to become painful, so he started rubbing himself against the couch, and God did it feel good, he started moaning into your pussy, your taste was driving him crazy, the little sounds that escaped you while he devoured you just got him harder and harder. He left your hole to go back up to your clit, sucking on it and pressing his tongue against it while one of his hands left your hip just for two of his fingers to enter your cunt seconds later, your hips buckled against him again, he placed your clit between his teeth and lightly pressed in response. Your legs started shaking when he did that, you had to place a hand over your mouth to not scream. He fingered you faster, curling his fingers into you and hitting your sweet spot.
He continued like this for a while, making a whimpering mess out of you, and thankfully, today he didn't seem to have the need to edge you endlessly until you were begging for release, he needed this as much as you, maybe even more. He was still rubbing against the couch, but he didn't notice he was doing it, he was too occupied getting you to your own high to care for himself at the moment. You were almost there, his fingers replaced his tongue on your clit, rubbing it rapidly. His mouth moved to your entrance, he knew you were close, and he wanted to taste every drop of your release.
You came with a loud moan that was thankfully muffled by your own hand, your vision went white and your legs trembled. Andrew drank you in, letting you ride out your high as he moaned into your pussy, and then you noticed his hips. He was desperately dry humping the couch, what a sight that was, you could tell he wasn't even noticing he was doing it, suddenly his hips buckled repeatedly and he was groaning into your cunt as he drank the last of you, his eyes were closed and his hand that was still grabbing you was doing so in a way that you were surprised it wasn't breaking skin. He'd come, just from eating you out, the thought made you giggle.
He kissed your clit one last time before pulling his head out from between your legs, his hair was a mess and the lower part of his face was glistening with your juices, he was panting heavily. “I- I didn't notice I was-” He said with heavy breaths, but you interrupted before he finished.
“Humping the couch while eating me out?” You asked in a teasing voice. A smirk plastered on your face.
“Yeah,” he laughed, “made a fuckin’ mess.”
“It's not noticeable from here.” You assured him.
“Good,” he leaned closer to you, hovering his body over yours, one hand held him up while the other found your waist. “Tank you for letting me do this, baby.” He kissed you gently, his accent thicker than before.
“Thank you for doing it.” You smiled.
“I love you so much,” he murmured between kisses, “my perfect girl, so fuckin' beautiful.”
“I love you too,” you kissed him back, “I should get dressed though.”
“Hmm, fine, but I'm keeping these until I see you next time.” He said, grabbing your panties from the pile of your clothes from the floor and keeping them in his hand.
“No, you're not, give them back!” You feigned annoyance, thinking he'd give them back.
“Would you rather I take back my shirt, then?”
“What would I wear then? I didn't bring a jacket.”
“Exactly, so these,” he held up your panties again, “are for me.” He placed them in his pocket right after.
“You’re horrible.” You fake pouted.
“You love me.” He grinned while handing you the rest of your clothes.
“You're lucky I do.”
“I know.”
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arlh0e · 3 months
Note
I'm not sure if you're taking requests but I figured I'd try. I've had the idea of Hozier/Andrew finding out you have an oral fixation/kink and using against you until you're a brain dead mess. I came to Tumblr to see if I could find anything but it surprisingly doesn't have a ton of Hozier fics considering he's basically everyone's dream man.
Anyway, thank you so much for reading this!!
Moments silence (common tongue)
Oh my god I love this idea! Im so glad Ive been getting smut requests because Im relatively new to smut writing so I adore being able to practice. My apologies in advance if this is super awkward to read bc I was having trouble trying to figure out how to describe homies dick. It also may turn out to be a little long, I am a whore for sucking dick so pardon me if I get excited and carried away.
Rating: Hozier x reader, graphic smut, hard dom! Andrew, oral m! And fem! Receiving, face fucking, the sloppiest of sloppy blowjobs, oral fixation, smut under the cut, general filth, plotless smut, reassurance, begging, choking, help I need him
You were squirming beneath him, his tongue and fingers working their usual magic.
He loved going down on you, your pleasure was his top priority every time that he took you to bed, he absolutely loved making you feel good.
You hadn’t told him that you had a similar affinity with giving him the same pleasure. Of course, he knew you loved the act of giving, but to what extent he wasn’t fully aware of.
If you were honest, it was almost concerning how constantly you were thinking about the feeling of your mouth around him. It made you so wet that you had ruined more pairs of underwear than you were comfortable admitting. He made your mouth water and your mind go nearly completely blank with anything other than want for him.
You feel his fingers move from inside of you, his head lifting to meet your eyes. His pupils are dilated and you can see your arousal covering his lips. He looked utterly enchanting.
His hand moves toward your bottom lip, tapping it softly twice. “Open.” His voice is deeper than normal and his accent has thickened. You opened your mouth and let him push his fingers into your mouth, tasting yourself on his skin. You find yourself sucking gently on his fingers, moving your tongue across his digits, wishing it were his cock in your mouth instead.
You let out a moan as his fingers leave your mouth, not even processing the words you were saying. “If you don’t let me suck your dick right now I may just lose my mind.” Your voice was coming out in gasps and moans, you were desperate, bordering on feral.
He quirked a brow at you, smiling smugly down at you. “Oh, is that right?” He presses a gentle kiss to your lips, pulling away just slightly so that you could still feel his breath across your face, your noses were still touching. “I was wondering when you were going to tell me about this little fixation you have with putting your mouth on me.” He chuckled darkly, looking at you through hooded eyes.
You couldn’t even say you were surprised at this revelation. Of course he knew. You expected nothing less, and honestly you hadn’t exactly been secretive about it, you hadn’t ever tried to hide it, so of course he knew.
He moved his head away from yours, his fingers coming to your chin, squeezing it gently. “I want you to beg.” His tone was serious, leaving no room to argue.
Your gaze shifted around the room, your eyes darting everywhere but his face as you felt the blush creep onto your face through your neck. You weren’t necessarily embarrassed, but you hadn’t ever told anyone about this particular interest of yours. The idea that he not only kew but was asking you to beg for it was entirely foreign to you. It made you squirm a bit beneath him.
“Ah ah.” He pulls a bit on your chin, forcing you to look back at him. “Eyes on me. Use your words.” His gaze was intense but encouraging, loving. He wanted to hear you ask nicely, but he also wanted you to feel comfortable. You knew he wouldn’t push you to do anything you didn’t want to.
“Please?” You looked up at him with wide eyes, batted your eyelashes just a little bit. “Pretty, pretty please?”
He chuckled a bit, smiling down at you, his mask cracking just a little bit. “With a cherry on top?” You loved the way he could go from this powerful, dominant being to his normal goofy self like this sometimes.
“Of a most delicious sundae.” You smile back at him, sticking your tongue out for a half second.
He just kept smiling down at you, his hold on your chin still firm. “Well I cant argue with that.” He stands, still clothed from the waist down, pulling you up to sit before him. Your hands stayed folded in your lap as you looked at him, standing before you, hands at his sides. “Go ahead, love.”
You slowly slip off the side of the bed and onto your knees in front of him. You could see the outline of his erection through his jeans, and you wondered for a second if that was uncomfortable. Surely it had to be.
You move your hands to fiddle with the button on his pants, frantically trying to undo the button and zipper. You always had a bit of trouble getting his hand pants all the way off of him, with how long his legs were, you couldn’t quite get them off, he always had to help you.
You took a moment to look at him, completely bare before you. He was beautiful, like a divine being come down to earth, and he was all yours.
You raise one hand to wrap it gently around his shaft while you used your tongue to wipe to bead of precum from his tip. The taste was salty and a bit bitter, but one you enjoyed nonetheless.
You carefully took him into your mouth, just a little bit at first, working up the nerve to try to go farther, moving slowly at first focusing on using your tongue to further his pleasure, hollowing your cheeks around him as you bobbed your head up and down along his length.
His hand flew to the back of your head, taking a fist full of your hair as his head leaned back and he let out a deep groan. He gently pushed on the back of your head, urging you to take him deeper and deeper.
You loved hearing the noises you could illicit from him, the way he gasped and tugged on your hair when you would moan in satisfaction around him, and you especially loved the louder sounds he would make for you, the way he would tell you how good you were doing and how good he felt. He was so vocal, and every word, noise, and gasp he made, pulled you in more.
“Fuck, you’re doing so good baby.” His voice was low and ever encouraging as he moved his hands through your hair, guiding your head along his cock at a relentless pace. You gagged, taking him farther than you had thought you were capable of.
You felt tears prickling your eyes as he kept bottoming out in the back of your throat, doing your best to keep your mouth closed but failing quite miserably as you continued gagging on him.
You found yourself struggling slightly to breathe between the saliva that was running down your chin and the pace at which he was hitting the back of your throat.
You moved your hand to tap frantically against his abdomen, wordlessly asking for a break to take a breath. After a few more thrusts, he backs away, his hands still in your hair, but granting you a break as he pulls gently on your hair to angle your head upward meeting his lips with yours.
You smile into the kiss, it was gentle, loving but urgent and nothing short of demanding. You moan into his lips, still smiling. As he pulls away, he makes a point out of observing the grin playing at your lips.
“So eager to please, darling.” He smiles darkly back at you, loosening his grip on your hair. He places another peck to your lips, then your forehead. “Do you want some more?” His gaze softened, looking down at you, smoothing your hair, a hint of concern in his eyes. He was making sure you were okay, checking in to make sure he wasn’t going too far or making you uncomfortable.
You nodded back at him, your smile not even faltering for a second. “Yes, please.” Your voice was raw, it felt like you had swallowed sand paper, and your voice cracked, but you didn’t even care. You wanted more of him. You wanted him to use you for his pleasure until you couldn’t speak or think or even breathe, and you were already halfway there.
You rose up higher on your knees, moving your hands to his hips, pulling him closer to you in an attempt to take him back into your mouth. You were met instead with a hand at the base of your neck, stopping you. You looked up at him with pleading eyes, begging him to let you have what you wanted.
He chuckled and moved his fingers to hold your chin once again, this time pulling you to your feet in front of him. “Uh uh. Lay down.” He removes his hand from your chin roughly, causing you to lose your balance and fall back onto the bed.
He makes his way around the bed to the side closest to your head, leaning over you, placing yet another kiss on your lips. “If you want me to stop, lap twice on my right thigh, alright?” You nod quickly, understanding where this is going, and quite eagerly scoot yourself to the end of the bed, your head dangling upside down over the side, your mouth falling open to welcome him.
He chuckles at your enthusiasm, moving his hands to rest on either side of your shoulders, bending himself over you as he pushes himself back into your mouth, deeper than before.
You let out a moan as the same time you hear him groan from over you. “Jesus fucking christ, love.” He curses, thrusting his hips into your mouth once again, starting slow and gradually picking up the pace.
He moves his hands to wrap around your neck, feeling himself move inside your throat. You were breathless, gasping in between his thrusts, chocking on his cock as well as your own saliva, gagging as he used you. Your hands were holding the backs of his thighs, pulling him closer to you, but also to ground yourself.
You were loving every moment of this. Relishing in the moment and the fact that you could deliver pleasure to him this way. You were utterly enchanted by him, his sounds, the curses he let out, the feeling of him moving in and out of your throat, you couldn’t think of any reason as to why you hadn’t told him this earlier.
With every second you could feel him coming closer, you also felt yourself becoming less and less able to think of anything but him. You were all but mindless, unable to form a single coherent thought, only embellishing in the feeling of his muscles, tensing all as once and then relaxing.
You tasted that same, familiar salty taste as you heard him breathlessly curse one final time before pulling out of your mouth and kneeling down next to your head.
You swallowed before offering him a dopey smile, still not fully in your right mind, high off the feeling of being useful to him.
He smiles back, standing up once again, this time to move you toward the pillows at the head of the bed, before laying himself next to you and gathering you in his arms.
“I take it we’ll be doing that again?” He smiles down at you and places a kiss to your forehead.
“Yes. A lot.” You giggle as you curl up into his arms, closing your eyes and letting his arms completely encase your frame.
Dom Andrew is my favorite Andrew to write tbh. Thank you for the request, hope you enjoyed it <3
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sunlight-fics · 8 days
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I WANT/NEED TO GIVE THIS MAN A HUG SO FUCKING BAD ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY
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daddyhausen · 20 days
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。 ・ : * ˚ : ✧ 。 「 PEARL ROSARY 」 。 ・ : * ˚ : ✧ 。
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「 MASTERLISTS 」 | 「 MUSICIAN/ BANDS MASTERLIST 」 | 「 HOZIER MASTERLIST 」
「 COMMISION INFO 」 | 「 LIKE MY WORK? BUY ME A COFFEE — KOFI — DXDDYHXUSEN 」
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「 SUMMARY 」 — blowjobs in the backseat of andrew’s car in the church car park
「 WARNINGS 」 — 18+, [ MINORS DNI ], mentions of religious procecussion, catholic!reader x catholic!hozier, oral sex [ male recieving ], facials, cumshot male orgasm
「 WORD COUNT 」 — 987
「 PAIRING 」 — fem!reader x hozier
「 GENRE 」 — smut
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「 TAGLIST 」 — @thewrestlingbitch @omg-im-such-a-masochist @bayleymania @wardlow @alexisquinnlee-bc @sammiejane22 @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @omegasluvbot @melissahausen @writtingrose @drummergrl1310 @unoficialy-married-to-ace-austin @bonehead-playz @legit9thlunaticwarrior @crowleysqueenofhell @romanreigns-supreme @janetreader @thenerdybaker523 @sunshinevirus @nicoleveno14 @rubyred1980 @harmshake @igncrxntripley @ripleyswhore @embermdk @thepalaceofmelanie @seeingstarks @kennysbadkitten @darkangelchronicles @ripleyswife @selena-tyler-564 @alyyaanna @nightmare-viper
「 COMMENT IF YOU WANT TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST 」
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the night had always brought peace in your life. it was the one time where you felt you could be your most authentic self, free from the pressures of the church, fromm the llering eyes of parishioners, of their judgemental stares and gossip. not that you were one to even stir any trouble or anything that would warrant their stares. why you, the church girl, the innocent doe with rosery in one and and veil shielding your eyes from any scrutiny.
yet, they still stare, still shun you for your love. despite your devotion to christ, your devotion to andrew outweighed it in thousands. he was the first to not judge, to not stare with glaring hate in your direction, but affection, the muddy green of his irises bore nothing but adoration. his hands gentle in their caresses of your skin, even in passing in the pews, always respectful, always gentle.
even now, positioned on your knees as you were so commonly used to in the church pews, however your lord was not looking down on you with praise, for in his place was andrew,. mouth agape with shallow breaths, as your lips worked magic around him. he knew the church would shame him, you moreso. for without the sanctity of marriage the two of you were engaging in nothing but common sin, the two of you knew that, however, the feeling would not stop, nor did you want it to.
with your lips wrapped around andrew, taking him inch by inch as he delved deeper into sin, fingers tightening in the soft strands of your hair, entangling him like a wicked serpent.
“oh darlin’” he hummed, head thrown back in a fit of pleasure. he adored it. he adored you. the mossy green irises flickered down at you every so often, watching as you swallowed his length with a soft mumble and a moan, avoiding his gaze with a heated tint rising on your cheeks
his hand would fall from your hair, smoothing down your cheek, trailing down your jawline until gingerly resting under your chin, tilting up your head ever so slightly to meet his eyes. He bore adoration and love for you, for this pleasure he was so happy and grateful to receive from you. in this moment you did not care what the church was to think, in this moment your lord held no power over you. andrew;s completely overshadows any presence your lord ever had.
the moonlight, hidden through cracks in the treeline caressed his skin so wonderfully, a glossy sheen of sweat and rain reflected off his skin and through the windows, he looked ethereal bathed in the moonlight, the harsh shadows of night obscuring his features aside from his lips and the tip of his nose whenever he’d let out a pleasured moan.
how he’d throw his head back, lips parting with a moan as you could see the bob of his adam’s apple ripple with his throat as the euphoric sound pared his lips. you’d sink your lips lower around him, feeling him nestle comfortably in the back of your throat, his cock throbbing against the flat of your tongue on the verge of release
“darlin’ please i…i’m so close”
his teeth gritted, grinding together as pleasure courses through him. as your cheeks hollowed, drawing him in deeper, taking all he had to offer.
“oh fuck-” he pulled out with a soft grunt.
his cum adored your face and neck, pearlescent under the moonlight. the sight only accentuated your beauty even in such a state of undress, you looked like an angel, sent down from heaven just for him. he couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit guilty for corrupting such a beautiful, innocent creature such as yourself. he couldn’t bare to think of the scrutiny you’d face if the church were to ever find out. Even if they were, andrew would not allow them to shame you, for he would bare the brunt of it to save you from ridicule, save you from the jeers and jusdgement.
“c’mere, love…” he pulled you from the floor, gingerly placinging you into his lap, his softening cock prodding the back of your thigh with dull pulses. the familiar irish twang of his voice echoed in your ears, accompanied by a subtle, content groan that rumbled in his chest.
his chin resting upon yours, silence befell the both of your as your breathing started to shallow, content in listening to the rhythmic beating of eachothers hearts. his thumb, docile in it’s movements, prodded at your bottom lip, swiping away the pearlescent streak of his cum from your skin, doing so until your flesh was “pure” to the untrained eye.
“what if they find out about us?” your voice barely above a whisper, a mere squeak like that of a field mouse.
“hmm?” andrew hummed. not so much that he wasn’t listening, moreso his voice was hoarse from pleasured moans. his hand wrapped around your thigh with a protective grip, thumb smoothing across the skin in gentle circles.
“the church? what if they find out about us?” you reiterated, repeating you question as if he hadn’t heard you the first time, with more desperation and worry to your voice.
“they won’t” he replied simply. almost nonchallontally
“you don’t know that-”
“and how do you know that they will?” his question rhetorical, cutting your sentence off in the process.
it sounded rude although that was defintely not his intention. andrew’s jaw tightened for a moment, the protective grip on your thigh still evident. he was contemplating his next words, carefully, evidently. you could see the cogs turning in his head as his eyebrows furrowed, chewing the inside of his cheek in though.
“i will not let them shame us for giving in to our basic instincts.” he responded cautiously, mind still in thought.
“i will not let them shame us for being human”
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Another Layer of In-Yun Pt 2
Pairing: Andrew Hozier-Byrne x fem!reader
Summary: A slow morning nestled in each other’s arms, turns into Andrew ravishing you.
Pt 2 of Another Layer on In-Yun
Content Warming: MDNI, smut, oral fem!receiving, language, confessions of love, fluffy smut, dom! Andrew, slight praise kink (barely)
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“I’m sorry that was a bad joke, I hope you don’t take back the I love you’s” you laugh. His voice still has that soft edge to it. He laughs along with you as he leans closer, his lips grazing yours again. 
“It’s okay, I’m a sucker for the shitty puns you make. If anything, it makes me love you that much more.” He kisses you again, his lips lingering on yours as he pulls away. His eyes close, and he smiles as he looks at you, his voice still soft and warm. As you both feel the kiss deepen, his  hand traces along your shoulder, down to your collar bone, his voice like treacle as he speaks. “Is it just me, or are you the most gorgeous girl in the entire universe?” He smiles softly as he tilts his head gently, his eyes open slightly. His lips linger on yours for a moment before pulling away. “Just you” you whisper. He chuckles, his voice still low and soft “Don’t be silly, honey. Your beauty is unmatched… you put goddesses to shame” He kisses your forehead, his other hand caressing your waist. You can feel his breath against your skin. He moves his lips down to your neck and kisses you along the line of your jaw, running his hand through your hair again. “So pretty”. You grab his hair pulling him closer into your neck as he nips at the exposed skin, leaving marks. His voice takes on a deep, sensual tone as his lips bite you along your jaw. He move lower and lower along the side of your face. His voice is a whisper, his breath sending chills down your spine “You like that, honey?” He speaks softly, the feeling of his breath tickling your neck sends goosebumps up it. 
“God yeah” you moan out.
His drips with command getting hoarser when he speaks, as his kisses become more intense. His breathing is gets faster as one hand grabs your waist and the other is running through your hair “Such a great reaction... you’re so sensitive... and so pretty... Do you enjoy that?” His voice is a low whisper as he lets out a long exhale while biting you on the neck again.
“Ah” you whimper slightly biting you li. His voice softens as he hears your reaction, his lips trail down your neck until they reach your collar bone. His hands are moving along your body now, one on your lower back and the other sliding up your torso. He could feel himself straining against the confines of pants now, your reactions only fuelling his desire. “Shhh… just enjoy it. I want to treat you like the goddess you are. I want you to tell me what you want, honey? Can you do that? Just be a good girl and let me do my work.” His hand snakes between your bodies pressing against each others moving down to your collar bone. He removes the T-shirt of his you were wearing from last night, exposing your chest to him.  He cups your breast in one hand slowly rolling the peak of you nipple, as the skin dimples under his touch. He lowers his head catching the other breast between his lip, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin. His other hand massaged the curve of your breast at an agonisingly slow pace. 
As the words die in your throat, your voice is replaced by a soft moan. The feeling of his hands sliding down your body makes you tremble slightly. He speaks again with his lower, sensual voice as he sucks on your skin “Damn… can’t get enough of me can you, love”
“Fuck. Yes.” You respond more so in a moan than in coherent words as you feel him move further down, his lips outlining the curves of your chest and your expanded ribcage. 
Your breath catches as his lips move down along your stomach, his hands trailing along your sides. Your whole body feels like a ball of fire, like every single inch of your skin is on a slow, steady burn. You try to hold back your breathing as he whispers along your torso “You’re so sexy, honey… So beautiful… Do you like what I’m doing to you?”
“Yes please don’t stop”
He chuckles at your words, slowly kidding the lining of your parties. He hooks one finger to their side, skilfully peeling them of. You lay in front of him with your core revealed, he stops for a second to take in the sight of how ready you are for him. “Ambrosia” he moans before delving show tongue in your folds. Licking a bold stripe across your vulva. As his tongue moves, his breathing slows down, and each exhale feels like it sends goosebumps along your skin. he moves you so now you’re trapped underneath him, his tall farm covering your body as his head moved  away from your heated arousal back to your torso, kissing and nipping at your hip and his hands massage the flesh of your ass.
As he pins you under him, your whole body feels like it’s melting underneath. His tongue continues exploring along your skin, the erection he had been harbouring had grown to it’s full length trying to relive itself by holding onto the the sliver of friction is felt every time you moved you legs underneath his weight. With each kiss, each nip, each lick, it’s like your skin is being kissed by fire. Your body is completely surrounded by his warmth, and your breath gets heavier. You felt him suck your pubic bone, the need to feel his touch again clouding all your senses.
“Andrew baby, pleaseeee”
His breath catches a bit when you beg him. Your voice is a whisper, even though he can hear every word. His voice takes on that sensual edge again as he smiles at you. 
“Please what, honey?”
“I need you there” you moan.
His breath slows again when you moan, " youneed me where, honey?" You bite your lip at his incessant teasing.
“Need you to taste me”
He laughs at how desperate you’re becoming, his voice still low and sensual as he speaks “You’re so eager, hm? Can’t keep my baby waiting, can I?” 
His hand reaches up again to trace gentle languid circles on your inner thigh, inching up slowly. You feel his hot breath against your exposed vulva, a welcome change from the cold air that it had been exposed to since he moved his head away. You feel an involuntary shiver travel down your spine  to shake a little, mouth agape in anticipation. Your eyes flutter shut.
“Hey look at me while I taste you, yeah?” he says. You open your eyes to the sight of him between your legs. His hair wild and his unwavering green eyes on yours. He picks up your legs and places them over his shoulder to get better access. He smiles at you again, as you feel your throat get dry and your heart is beat at an intense pace.
He lowers his head licking another bold stripe across your arousal, collecting your juices along his tongue. You feel yourself clench around nothing at the sensation. You feel his lips latch on to your clit and flicking it with his tongue, sending jolts through your body. He wraps his lips around it as he sucks it gently bringing his other hand to tease your tight entrance. You can feel yourself getting wetter under his touch.
You hands tug at his hair bringing him closer, your eyes still open looking down at him.
And before you can process all the electric signals, you suddenly feel full as he slips one finger inside you, collecting the juices and spreading them over your vulva as he doesn’t let his attention waver from your clit.
He slowly moves his face down as he licks the hole of your entrance. Tasting your arousal on his tongue as his nose rubs against your sensitive bundle of nerves. The combined stimulation already starts threatening to take over. 
“Fuck Andrewwww” you let out a long breathy whimper as he hooks another finger inside of you.
“So good for me, my love. So wet. So taught” he whispers against your core looking up at you through hooded eyes.
He can feel himself getting closer to the edge as well, his hips humping against the mattress, trying to get some relief.
 You. look down at the sight of him in between your legs, finger pumping in and out of you slowly with his tongue flicking against your clit. You feel his bulge pressing up on your leg, he was just as wound up as you were.
“Please Andrew. I need you. Faster” you manage to string together a sentence. 
As you beg him to go faster, he looks up at you with a playful grin, his eyes not closing, a grin on his face. “You would rather get what you want now, rather than wait a little longer for it? A little patience, honey, and you’ll be satisfied.” His voice is soft but full of that teasing edge.
“Please I’m so close baby please” your head rolls back and your back arches off the mattress to feel his touch again.
A grin spreads across his face as he listens to you beg him, as he replies "So close? You're so close to what, darling? I need you to tell me, you promised didn’t you?”
“Need to come on your hand Andrew please, fuck”
“Yeah? Well then, I can’t say no to your pretty face. Always so perfect for me, yeah?” he pushes in another finger into you, as both his fingers pump in out of you and curl upwards slowly to brush against your g spot over and over again your mind starts to blank at his touch? With each pump
he curves his fingers more inside of you brushing over the tender spot again and again as his eyes stare up at your face contorted in pleasure.
He kisses your neglected clit and flicks the bud a few times. 
The sudden sensation is what ultimately catapults you off the edge. Wave after wave, your orgasm washes over. You feel your body tremble under the ecstasy of it.
He feels your walks clench against his finger and then French them in your come. Seeing you so blissfully fucked out is what sets him off. He feels the blood rushing through his cock finally reaching the pinnacle and then he comes too, just looking at you. Without you even touching him. 
“Fuckkkk” he moans. He loses himself for a second in a wave of unbridled pleasure. But he still pumps his finger into you, helping you ride through your own orgasm. Your legs spasm around his head, as he uses his free hand to draw comforting circles over your thigh to stabilise you.
“Shh, so perfect for me, yeah sweetheart? Got me wrapped around your finger. Or rather the other way around” he chuckles and whispers sweet nothings into you core as you come down from your high. He takes out his finger from inside of, the sudden feeling of nothingness down there sends a shiver down your spine. You feel him coming up planting kisses along your jaw as he does. 
His voice still carries a tone of that playfulness. He pulls you up, your face level with his, his hands cupping your cheeks “Such a good girl, such a pretty one. You really are my little star, you know that?”
You move up to capture his lips in a searing kiss to express your gratitude, you can taste yourself on his tongue. You tangle yourself hand in his hair, wanting to never let him go. 
As you both pull away for air he brings his two fingers covered in your juices to his mouth as he slowly kicks it off taking in the last of your flavour?
Your voice is a whisper as you watch him, your breath catching at the sight. He finishes licking his fingers clean, a seductive smirk on his face. His voice is still just a whisper as he leans closer to you, his hands running down your thighs to pull you close.
“ Mmmm like I said, ambrosia. You wanna taste how sweet you are, my love?” he whispers as you nod your head, he releases his fingers from his mouth with a lewd pop and brings them to yours. You open up catching his fingers around your lips sucking them gently, your tongue stroking giants his digits. 
His voice catches when you suck his fingers, and he bites his lip as he watches you. His eyes are glued to yours as you do, and there’s a soft tremble to his voice as he speaks again “God, you’re amazing… you taste like nectar, I don’t think I could ever get enough.”
You release his fingers with another pop. 
“Only for you, my love” you whisper against his lips, bumping your nose to his. He strokes your face gently and kisses you gently ast first, but you deepen the kiss to have access to his whole mouth. You feel like you’ve never been more alive than you are right now. He pulls away, his voice carrying a soft, deep tone when he speaks again “My god…”
“Andrew, that felt so good. Thank you” whisper against his lips as you stare into his eyes. 
He smiles at you, his voice taking on that deeper tone again, and he runs his fingers through your hair as he pulls you close again, his voice still a whisper “I could spend the rest of my life pleasing you. Every life after this. I could spend every second of it making sure you’re pleased by me.”
“I love you so much, baby” he whisper against his lips. Content and satiated. 
“I love you too. Beyond belief.”
I hope you guys enjoyed this, like I said it’s first time writing something and putting it out for other’s to see so I hope this was okay. Requests are open if you have suggestions, or just wanna talk.
Thanks for reading! <333
226 notes · View notes
mulberrimouse · 2 months
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Part 2!! Thank you guys for all the love and support on part 1 :)
Part 1 here!
Info and warnings!!: Friends to lovers, Andrew x FemReader, HEAVY smut (MEANING SEX) , non-scientific terms (such as cock and pussy, etc etc). Breeding kink and nipple play if you squint and tilt your head to the right a little. Making out, teasing, praise and devotion, and the fluffiest of fluffy aftercare.
This is my first time writing real smut in a long while so please be gentle! It'll be clunky and I don't really know how to use replacements for genitalia and whatnot.
Again, thank you so much and sorry for any grammar/spelling mistakes :3
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Andrew pulled you the rest of the way down the hall and got to your room. Your heart was pounding in your chest and you were pretty sure he could hear it. As soon as he had the door shut behind you, he grabbed your waist and shoved you against it, flooding your senses with the feel of his hands and the scent of cologne.
You felt butterflies at the familiar aroma. You've spent so long with it stuck in your house and even your sheets after letting him crash at your place. Everytime you breathed in around him, you felt your chest get warm at the smell. You felt heartache when it lingered around your house after he was gone.
You were pulled from your thoughts when Andrew spoke up.
"Are you okay, sweetheart? You seem distant."
You look up and see his worried expression and feel a pang at your heart. Sure, you definitely wanted him. You've spent months feeling almost ravenous at the mere thought of him. However, you really did love him.
"I'm alright Andy. Just a little overwhelmed is all."
He hummed and smiled before leaning down to kiss you, softer than he had all night. You smiled into his lips, causing him to smile. The both of you broke out in giggles and he backed up slightly, his hands loosening.
"You're sure you're okay, though? We don't have to do anything."
"Yes Andy, I'm alright. I just..." You trail off, suddenly bashful. You desperately want to tell him how happy you are, how relieved, but the sight of his messy hair and heaving chest are causing your brain to short circuit. Not to mention his hands still resting on your hips and his messy makeup. "I'm just very happy is all."
"I'm happy, too sweetheart. I can't tell you how long I've wanted this. We'll go slows alright? ... At least for now."
You nod and wrap your arms around his neck to pull him into you. As he kissed you, you felt dizzy and lovesick all over. He pulled you off of the door and led you over to your bed where he laid you down, lips not leaving yours even once.
When he pulled away, he giggled a little bit. You were confused and slightly mortified, wondering what could be making him laugh right now.
"What are you giggling about, Andy?"
"Oh nothing. It's just my face paint."
"What do you mean?"
He opened his mouth to speak but he quickly shut it, instead pulling out his phone and opening his camera. Before you could say anything, he snapped a picture and turned the phone so you could see. His makeup was smeared around you mouth. You giggled at that, too, and grabbed his phone.
"You should see yourself then!"
You took a picture and showed him how he looked. He let out a full laugh and took the phone back to place it on the night stand.
"Should we clean this off, first? I wanna do this right and I don't know if that includes smudging makeup everywhere"
You both walk over to the bathroom and you hand Andrew the makeup wipes in your bathroom cabinet. He pulled one out and turned to face you. He grabbed your face gently and you close your eyes as we swiped the cloth over your face. When he was done, he pulled out another and did the same to his own. After throwing them away, he turned to you and grinned before leaning down and capturing your lips with his. He guided you back to your bead with out breaking contact. Eventually, you both made it to your bed and you laid down.
Andrew kissed you and started to make his way down your throat, paying extra attention to your collar bones. He left as many marks as he could, thoroughly enjoying the idea of people seeing them the next time you go out. Every nip and lick drew a tiny whimper from your throat that drove him insane. Once he was satisfied with the bruises, he pulled away and slipped his fingers under the collar of your sweater. He paused and looked up at you.
"Remember, you can back out at anytime, sweetie. Okay?"
"Yes, Andy just please!"
He laughed and shook his head, mumbling just loud enough for you to hear. "Needy little thing."
He pulled at your collar to leave a few more bites and small marks before you sat up enough to yank your sweater off. At that point, Andrew might've stopped breathing. The dark green lace bra you were wearing made you look devine to him. You heard him let out a groan before he was licking and biting your tits through the fabric.
"Fuck- Andy. Jesus." You give out a surprised laugh. "Give me a second and I can get it off."
"Fuck, angel," his words were slightly muffled as he refused to pull away. "You're so god damn beautiful."
"No more candy nicknames, huh?" Your words came out through whines and puffs of air as he continued assaulting your chest.
"It's what you are. A fucking angel."
Before you could say anything back, Andrew managed to unclasp your bra and pull down the straps enough for it to slide off. As soon as he saw you sitting bare for him, he lost it. He shoved you against the bed and immediately starting kissing and sucking at your chest. You heard muffled moaning leave his mouth and looked down to see him rubbing his cock into your mattress.
"Fuck- Andy, baby please! Need you."
He groaned and looked up at you, his eyes half lidded and loose strands of hair falling out of his bun. "Say it again. Now. Please angel."
"Need you t'fuck me."
He nodded and sat on his knees. The cool air and spit made you squirm. The laughed and swiped his thumbs over your nipples lightly, not expecting much. However, you whined and arched your back, silently pleading for more.
"Oh really, angel? You want that?"
"Yesyesyesyes please Andy please!"
He used both hands now, curling and pulling at the buds of your tits as you moaned and whimpered. It didn't take long before he couldn't stand it.
"M'sorry angel. I can't take it. I need you. Now."
You nod your head embarrassingly fast and move to take your skirt off. His mission of removing his tie and getting off his shirt goes completely abandoned when he sees you wearing panties that match the lace and color of your bra.
"Shit..."
You look up, confused and slightly worried. You see Andrew staring down at you, pupils blown wide. His arms drop at the same time he does. Before you're even sure of what's happening, he's on his knees in front of you, pulling you closer to him by your waist. All he does is look into your eyes. You nod your hair and he instantly ducks down and sucks your clit into his mouth.
You throw your head back and arch your back, gripping at the sheets. Through your own moaning, you hear Andrew whimpering as he slides down a little to teas around your entrance.
"Oh god please Andy, please!"
You're a little surprised when he doesn't put up a fight or tease you in anyway. He fucks his tongue into you as much as he can while he circles around your clit with his thumb. You can feel yourself on the edge, just about to fall off.
"Please please please don't stop- I'm so fucking close!"
He hums and nods his head as much as he can, moving back up to suck on your clit and flick his tongue back and forth. The vibrations send you over the edge. You nearly scream, but clamp your hand over your mouth, aware again of the people just down stairs.
He slowly settles his movements, letting you come down. You were panting at this point, heart pounding as you tried to come back to earth. When you did finally return, Andrew was still on his knees, watching you like a feral animal.
"Was that good, angel?"
You nod and laugh a little, astounded that he would even have to ask. He smiled and nodded before standing up and crawling over you.
"Do you think you could cum again? On my cock this time? Please?"
At that, all you could do was yank him down and kiss him. He spoke quietly against your mouth, begging for an answer.
"Yes I can just- please fuck me."
He manages to quickly take off his tie and unbutton his shirt enough to yank it off. His hands go down to the button and zipper of his pants but you away them away. He chuckles lightly as you start to unbutton them for him, eyes widening as you see the strain on his boxers from how hard he is. You worry slightly that it won't fit or it'll hurt too much but Andrew's hips jerk forward and he whines a little before he cuts himself off, slightly embarrassed.
You pull the pants down his thighs before he stands up to pull them off. He dips his fingers under the band of his boxers and slips them off, quickly walking over and getting on his knees on the bed. You look down and gasp a little. His cock was long, which you could've assumed after what happened at the party earlier, but fuck. The tip was red and he was leaking precum.
He leaned over, propping himself up with hands on either side of your head, and you looked up at him, eyes wide and slightly glossy. He kissed you, all teeth and tongue, buying your bottom lip and moaning into your mouth. He grabbed his cock and slid it through your pussy. He found your entrance. As soon as he pushed the tip inside you, you fell back. He kept going, pausing momentarily to let you adjust to his length.
When he finally pushed in all the way, he stayed completely still. You finally opened your eyes and saw that his were still shut. He was breathing heavy and his arms were shaking a little.
"Andy, are you okay? Baby?"
He nodded and opened his eyes to look at you.
"Yeah, just- shit... You feel so good. Don't want this to be over immediately."
You nodded and assured him he could take his time. After a few deep breaths, he pulled back and pushed back in. He lost it, falling towards you and holding himself up on his forearms.
He tried to stay slow, he really did. He didn't want to hurt you in any way. But the sounds you were making, the begging and whining, scratching his back with tears forming in your eyes. It got to him. He leaned back and pulled your hips onto his thighs and smaller into you, over and over. You grabbed the blanket and pulled it up so you could bite down on it, desperately trying to muffle your screams.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuck, you feel so god damn good, angel. Jesus fuck- so soft and wet and warm. God... I'm close."
You nod and let out an embarrassing long whine before gripping on to his hand. The pressure that had been building up in your stomach easy about to explode and you knew it'd be extreme. He reaches out a little so it's easier before speaking again.
"Where- Jesus christ. Where do you want me to cum? Hurry, angel."
"Inside! Please inside, Andy!"
He groaned and his movement stuttered. He started going harder somehow, and nearly growled.
"Yeah? Inside? Fuck, you're gonna get it all, angel."
You cum right after he finishes speaking, back arching and eyes squeezed shut. He feels you squeeze around his cock and after a few more thrusts, he's cumming too. He shudders and starts bucking his hips uncontrollably, using the last of his energy to ride out the high for as long as possible.
Finally, he comes down. The both of you are sweating and hot but neither of you care. He collapses down on top of you and breathes into your neck. You hand goes straight into his hairs combing through the locks and scratching his scalp. He hums and practically melts into your body. You feel sleep take hold and the last thing you hear is "I love you." before you pass out.
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The next morning, the house is quiet. You come back to your senses and you feel a pair of arms wrapped around you, holding you close. You feel quite gross as you remember you hadn't actually showered, but your pure joy at finally having Andrew greatly outshines it.
You check your phone and see a text from your friend, sent the night before.
"I saw you head up the stairs with HIM. Don't be a pussy. I'll clear everyone out in a little bit. Love you!!"
You giggled and sent a little thank you before shutting off your phone and leaning back into Andrew. He hummed and grumbled a little bit before his eyes fluttered open, instantly looking for you. He smiled and pulled you in closer.
"Good morning, sweetheart."
"Morning, Andy."
You whisper sweet things to each other, never seeming to be able to stop grinning. He kisses you as much as he can, holding your face close to his. It's slow and gentle and full of love. After a while, you both agree to hop in the shower.
He washed your hair and runs conditioner through it. He gives you a small massage as you scrub off your body. He let's you scratch and massage his scalp with shampoo before kicking you out to let you dry off and get into bed.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes! You're tired. Go lay down and wait for me, okay? I'll be out soon."
You eventually give in, leaving the bathroom and changing into a tee-shirt and clean underwear. Eventually, Andrew comes back out, sweat pants hung low and hair still damp but not dripping. He climbs into bed with you, immediately warming you up. He kissing your forehead, eye lids, then cheeks and chin, before connecting with your lips. He sighs and you can feel his shoulders relax.
The rest of the morning is spent in bed with him, talking about nothing.
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OKAY!!!! DONE!!!! This one was significantly longer and I hope you enjoyed!!! Lots of luvvvvv :3
232 notes · View notes
daydreaming-in-letters · 10 months
Text
Apricity
07/12/2023
Pairing: Andrew (Hozier) x fem!reader
Word Count: 3,733
Warnings: rpf, language, alcohol, heartbreak, pining, fluff
Summary: After a painful breakup, Andrew needs the comfort of his best friend.
A/N: I'm going to church tonight, and I brought an offering for the god(s). Hope you like it.
Picture by Daniel Goodman via Business Insider
If you like my story, you are very welcome to like, comment or reblog. No permission is given to copy, repost or share my work on other platforms.
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“Last orders.”
The booming voice rolled through the thick, hot air like thunder. It was a wonder they could hear it at all above the music and buzz of voices, she thought, but the bearded man behind the counter looked like the type who knew exactly how to make himself heard. Andrew on the other hand was not a man who raised his voice in conversation regularly, still she shivered when instead she suddenly felt his hot breath waft through her hair.
“Shall we take another?”
But he was gone before she could even turn to face him, let alone process his words and form a coherent answer.
“Oh, so no to that,” he misconstrued the confusion on her face as their eyes finally met. “You could have just said so, you know. No need to pull a face like that.”
“What face?”
“You know, the one where your eyebrows knit together just a tiny bit and the corners of your mouth fall a little.”
He tried to mimic her expression and whether he had intended to or not, he made her laugh. And as if that wasn’t enough already, he smiled along, that crooked half-smile of his, almost as if he was surprised anything he did could genuinely amuse her. 
“Andrew, that’s just my usual face. It doesn’t mean anything. Although…”
“Ah, see. Not just your usual face after all then. You can’t fool me, you should have realised that by now. I don’t know why you still keep trying though.”
The slight curl of his lips reappeared for a moment, making him look so very proud of himself. And, for the first time this evening, almost a little happy. Now who was she to take that away from him by telling the truth: that she had been fooling him about her true feelings for months, maybe even years, and very successfully so, it seemed. 
“You’re a grown-up, Andrew. Have a drink if you want another. But—”
The last word had earned her a very dramatic roll of his eyes.
“I knew there was a ‘but’.”
“Yes, Freud, we know, you can look through me like glass, anticipating my every move.”
He chuckled. “Finally you see reason, woman.”
“But seriously,” she could see another remark form behind his mischievous eyes, so she was quick to make her point, “is that wise? Another drink will only make you sadder than you already are.”
“Sad? I’m not sad. I’m angry. Fucking furious to be precise.” 
Mostly with himself, she assumed. In all this time she had known him, he had never held a grudge against anyone for long, if at all. But it wasn’t as easy for him to forgive himself at times. Still, anger was progress.
“Good.” Softly she squeezed his hand and waited until the tension of his sudden outburst slowly subsided. “That’s good. You’re moving into the next phase then.”
He mumbled something under his breath, the sentence impossible to understand against the bustle of the pub. The only word she could identify was “Freud”, enough to help her understand that it had just been another of his sassy retorts. His next words came clearer though.
“If that really is a good thing, why can I hear concern in your voice?”
“I’m just surprised, that’s all. I didn’t think you would recover from her so soon.”
Andrew had not told her what exactly had passed between them and she didn’t want to pry. She only knew that they had argued, and that his girlfr—ex-girlfriend—had given him an ultimatum of some sort. Whatever it had been about, he obviously hadn’t decided in the woman’s favour.
“Why shouldn’t I?” 
Before she was able to stop herself, she could feel her brow rise, reminding him that they both knew he wasn’t the type that skipped through relationships. The final decision had been made a mere five days ago, a rather short time in her opinion to move into the phase of anger. But Andrew wasn’t her and for all she knew whatever it was that had led to the sudden end of this relationship might have given him reason in abundance to be infuriated. 
“Come on, I only knew her for what? About half a year? It’s not as if she was…” For a brief moment he paused, his eyes resting on her while he tried to swallow the words that had already been forming on his tongue. But it was too late and when he finally continued, his voice was softer than it had been all evening, almost fragile. “…the love of my life.”
Eagerly he gulped down the remains of his drink as if to clean his mouth from its last statement before the glass hit the counter with an audible clink.
“You’re right though. I probably shouldn’t have another one of these. Better call it a night.”
He didn’t even wait for her response, long fingers already busy stuffing his lush bun underneath a grey beanie. She had just slipped into her jacket when he already turned to lead the way. It would be easy to get to the entrance with him in the lead, his tall form parting the crowd effortlessly for them. But he didn’t seem quite as confident in the impact of his height as he hesitated for a moment. She had no idea why, not until she could suddenly feel the warmth of his hand closing around her own. His action startled her, only for a brief second, while her brain was trying to recall a thousand memories at once just to make sure she wasn’t mistaken in thinking that he had never done this before. He hadn’t. Still it felt normal. Easy. Everything was always easy with him. Conversations, silence, laughing, crying — it was all easy. Effortless and comfortable. Natural.
It wasn’t long though before they were met with the cold night air. It hit her hard, almost making her take a step back as, with the first inhale of fresh air, it invaded her lungs. Still it was nothing, an irrelevant fact, drowned out against the much harsher sensation of his hand gliding out of hers. 
He didn’t even need to fully raise the hand that had been hers for a blink of time to make the taxi hold in front of them. But it was enough for the icy air to crawl underneath her clothes and wrap around her in a tight grip. Not even his sweet gesture of holding the door for her combined with the warmth that streamed towards her from inside the cabin could keep her from shaking violently.
And it didn’t stop. Not when the door closed, not when his body pressed against hers in the limited space of the back seat. She was almost convinced that nothing would ever stop this chill, when suddenly his voice filled the silence to state the obvious.
“You’re shivering. Come here.”
And then his arm was there, invading the unclaimed territory of her neck and shoulders to pull her close. It may have been the spirits inside her system, making her needy and weak to his touch. Whatever it was, she didn’t care as she sank deeper and deeper into the unmatched heat that seeped freely from him, directly underneath her skin. She could feel his chest rising and falling so evenly, as if her closeness meant nothing, as if this was the normal way to be. It was infectious, hypnotising her into a state of untainted drowsiness, one last thought remaining on her mind. This was it, not just the normal way to be, the only way to be. Even more so as his lips pressed to her hair, a gesture so tender it made her heart flutter, and she knew that she would never recover from this moment, however insignificant it was to him.
“I don’t think I told you, but I’m so glad you’re here.”
His words were mumbled against the crown of her head, almost inaudible above the noise of the car and the blaring music from the radio, but she had heard them and would cherish them forever, sealed inside her heart until her last breath.
For most, they would be the bare minimum after crossing an ocean in a hurry simply because she had known something was off. She always knew, from the fatigued tone of his voice to the slight change of colour in his eyes, from the way he had to force his smile, never quite reaching the full infectious gleam it usually held, his mind anywhere but with her while his fingers kneaded the palm of his hand in discomfort. 
She also knew that it had probably been an overreaction, but she would do a lot more for him than spend her last savings on a transatlantic flight and an overpriced Airbnb, for him, she would walk all the way through the eternal fires of hell and back if that was what it took to make him whole again. He probably wouldn’t do the same for her, but that didn’t matter. She didn’t expect him to, that was not the way love worked.
“Well, first and foremost I came here to whup that woman’s ass for treating you like...well, the way she did. Comforting you was just second on my list.”
Stirred by a deep chuckle, his hot breath wafted through her hair for the second time this night. It was addictive, and dangerous, because it made her want to cuddle in deeper until it was too late to let go. And right now, just for a second, she allowed herself to hope that he might actually let her. Later this night, she promised herself, she would forget all about it. Forget about the soothing warmth he gave her and the light his presence brought to her life, always. It would be hard to erase the memory of a love that had never been and never would, even more so in the cold of an unfamiliar bed, reminding her mercilessly that she was just another foreigner in a city of millions of strangers. In a world where no one truly knew her but one. And even he didn’t know the one thing she so desperately wanted him to know, yet feared to tell him the most.
“We both know that’s not true.” For a second she held her breath, stupidly fearing he had been listening in on her thoughts. “You couldn’t even hurt a fly.”
Technically, he was right, she silently agreed with him while she relaxed in his arms again. But this was about him. And seeing him like this, this gentle, loving, warm soul, defeated by the betrayal of someone he had given his whole heart to—even if he denied that now… To her, that was reason enough for far more than just a firm ass-whupping.
Maybe she should finally listen to the nagging voice inside her head and tell him just that. It seemed simple enough, a few words spoken from the heart and it would at last be out of her system. After month and month of silence it would be out in the open, released from her heart and yet vague enough for him to take it one way or the other. Like a spectator from the outside she felt herself move to leave his embrace, but before she even had the chance to open her mouth, he beat her to it. A strained groan fell from his lips, eyes rolling heavily in their sockets and she thought she might have missed the moment in which she had already made her confession without even noticing, when she realised his agitation had nothing to do with her at all. 
“Oh, come on. Of all the songs…”
Instant relief washed over her, causing a rush to the head that made her feel a little lightheaded. Enough for a cheeky grin to curl her lips.
“No, don’t you dare. Don’t even think about—” he warned, but too late.
“Go on now, go, walk out the door, just turn around now ‘cause you’re not welcome anymore…”
Her voice sounded all croaky and flat and she gave it her all to make it sound even worse. Knowing her absolute lack of talent, she usually avoided singing in public, and it had only ever happened on a handful of occasions, when the alcohol had made her indifferent to the physical pain she caused her poor audience. Andrew had always teased her relentlessly afterwards, but she knew all too well that he found it endearing and very amusing. He couldn’t deny that now, although his furrowed brows might give a different impression, but it didn’t take long until he accepted his defeat and the sweetest of smiles spread on his lips. And after leaving her hanging for another few lines, he joined in.
“I used to cry, but now I hold my head up high and you see me, somebody new, I'm not that chained-up little person still in love with you. And so you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free. Well, now I'm saving all my lovin' for someone who's loving me…”
They were both belting at the top of their lungs, all the way through the song, and when it finally ended, they fell back into their seats, giggling and panting violently as if they had just finished running a marathon. She was still holding her belly, completely wrapped up in their little cocoon of pure joy when she realised that something was off. She hadn’t noticed at first, but the taxi had come to a stop. It was hard to tell how long it had been standing in front of the red brick row house already, but if the driver’s face was anything to go by, it might have been quite a moment since their arrival. 
He cleared his throat while he held her gaze in the mirror and Andrew’s laughter died away as well. She hated the cabby a little for taking this moment away from her friend and threw him a dirty look. Andy deserved being happy, so much, if only for the length of one single song. Careful to soften her gaze, she turned to look at him.
“Well, I guess this is me then.”
His answer was nothing but a tight lipped smile that left her with a thousand different options of interpretation. She was still trying to work out its meaning when for the second time this night, he took her completely by surprise.
It wasn’t the fact that he reached out for her to pull her in for a hug that startled her, he always did that before they said goodbye, but the way his embrace felt just a little tighter, his familiar scent more intoxicating than usual and the wool of his coat that suited him so exceptionally well unbelievably soft underneath her fingertips. In a mere moment he invaded her whole being, flowing through her freely until she could hear her soul hum in the silence that surrounded them. 
It felt unholy to pull away, the sacrilege petrifying her in her seat, leaving her with no option but to stare at him. She had almost forgotten how beautiful his eyes were. That lush, mossy green, flecked with warm, earthy shades, she wanted to dive into them, and never return. 
And there it was again, that one feeling she only ever had when she was with him. It was hard to pin down, it was not as if she was not complete without him. She was. But she had spent her whole life trying to fit in and with him, she didn’t have to. It just came naturally.
For a tiny moment, it seemed as if he was moving closer again. She noticed his eyes fall to her lips, or maybe she had imagined it. Either way, she couldn’t help herself from doing the same, watching the pink pillows open the slightest bit, a sigh waiting to fall, or a word, but it never came. Instead, a dog barked somewhere nearby and the moment was gone. 
When she looked up, it was unmistakeable that the sadness had returned to his eyes as well. She hated it, hated every second they didn’t shine as brightly as they usually did. She missed the excitement they used to hold, the warmth and kindness they radiated from beneath his long lashes. And her heart broke for him all over again.
A soothing smile on her lips, the palm of her hand cupped his bearded cheek. She wanted to tell him that even if everyone were to abandon him, she would always be there. The words were forming in her mind so clearly, all she had to do was open her mouth and deliver them, but instead she heard herself say, “There is someone out there for you, Andrew. I’m sure of it.”
He returned her smile, faintly, but it was definitely there and it didn’t leave even as he turned his head to kiss the palm of her hand. 
“Good night.”
“Night, love. I’ll call you in the morning.”
She nodded, and then she was gone. Andrew moved over to the spot where she had been sitting to watch her walking up the stairs. One hand pressed against the leather of the seat, he felt her warmth that still remained, felt his skin soaking it up to let it warm him from the inside. 
She had always possessed this power, to warm him up and thaw his heart, even though he had thought that this time it had frozen for good. But the second he had taken her hand in that pub—whatever had driven him to do so—he had known that all would be well eventually. It had been so right, so natural, to feel her like that, if only he would be brave enough to tell her. But he could never, not as long as there was even the slightest possibility she didn’t feel the same. Because more than loving her in secret, it would hurt to lose her forever. He would rather have her as a friend than not at all because for him, there was no life without her. 
There was no way he would ever tell her, but it was this exact truth that had ended his last relationship. Faced with the choice between her and anyone else in this world, it would always be her. No matter what. There had never been the tiniest chance he could have decided otherwise. 
And now he was surer than ever that he had made the right choice. Maybe this night had made him delirious, he still couldn’t tell. She had been so close, filling first his senses and then his mind with nothing but her until he had let himself believe that this could really be it. His life as it was supposed to be. For a second he had even imagined that she was leaning in, that she wanted to kiss him just as badly as he wanted to seal her lips with his. 
But even if she had, it was probably only pity speaking. Or worse, she might have thought that he needed a cheap substitute to drown his pain. And nothing could be further from the truth. He had almost been thankful for the bark that had interrupted them, without it he would never have found the strength to pull away and return her abrupt goodbye. Still, it was better this way. By morning he would have forced himself to forget about everything that could have been tonight, he would call her as he had promised and pretend that she didn’t hold his heart. It had always been like that. And it always would be. 
She had almost made it to the door by now. Her steps already slowing while she was fumbling for the keys in her bag. He didn’t know how hard it was for her to hurdle the remaining distance between herself and the door. Especially with all the tears clouding her gaze. She had felt them coming even before the taxi door had closed behind her. And so she hadn’t looked back, afraid he might see. And now that she had almost made it, she couldn’t even find those bloody keys in her stupid bag. 
It seemed like a miracle when she finally closed her hand around the cold metal to bring it to the dim light of the streetlamps. But her triumph had been too hasty, the keys gliding out of her slippery fingers and shattering onto the ground with an ugly clattering noise. 
The frustration set loose more tears, forcing her to fish around blindly for them and when she had finally managed to find them, she fumbled around equally clumsily to find the keyhole. Her only solace was that she had heard the taxi pull away while she had been hunching on the ground, so at least nobody had seen. He hadn’t seen.
“You know, I was wondering,” she jolted upon the unexpected voice, her keys hitting the ground once more as she turned around in a hurry to find him right in front of herself. “When you said someone— Are you crying?”
“No,” she promptly replied, but it was useless to deny the obvious, she realised, as her croaky voice sounded through the silence, fresh tears still burning hot on her cheeks. And Andrew being Andrew, he didn’t hesitate. In the blink of an eye he was there, gentle hands cupping her face and wiping away the salty streams. 
“Why are you crying, love?”
She didn’t answer, her throat sealed by a lump of fear. If she answered truthfully now, she would lose him. And she couldn’t, she mustn’t.
But he knew anyway. It was obvious from the way his forehead wrinkled and his eyes softened upon the realisation. She hadn’t expected the crooked smile though that slowly began to grace his lips. 
“I see.”
His lips were even softer than she could have ever imagined, moving so tenderly with hers. And even though this was happening so fast that she didn’t know if she was awake or dreaming, she felt herself relax in his arms. Letting go of all her worries was suddenly so easy. Everything was easy with him. 
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hauntingoldhouses · 22 days
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the literature professor who you have a particularly good relationship with
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eternalfae · 25 days
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When You're Gone (pt 2/??)
When you finally got back to your flat your heart was pounding. You practically ran inside, part of you still not believing he would really be there. You tried to not show your excitement as you opened the door, still in your uniform from work. You heard the TV on and Andrew was humming along with the opening theme song of some show. You could already see him laid out across your couch, so perfectly relaxed as if nothing had happened. You stepped in and closed the door behind you a little too hard, startling him. 
“Well, don’t you look excited to see me?” He had to crane his neck to see you, a small smile resting on his face. 
You couldn’t help but roll your eyes while you tossed your bag on the table near the front door. A catch-all table littered with anything someone could ever need. “A strange man broke into my home while I was at work, why wouldn’t I be delighted?”
He cocked a brow at that, face going serious. “That sounds like a big deal. You know who did it?”
You sat next to him on the small couch. “The cops are already on their way.” A moment of silence passed between both of you before you crossed your arms and turned to face him. “Why are you here, Andrew?”
“I finished, obviously.” He looked a little proud of himself, like a cat bringing you a mouse. 
You couldn’t help your attitude. While you were happy to see him, you were mad that he’d leave you alone long enough to miss him. “When?”
He frowned. “About three days ago. Quite frankly, I thought you’d be more happy to see me.” You felt trapped by the almost sad look in his eyes. You took him in for a moment, beard unkempt, hair a bit longer than what it was when he left. He definitely needed a trim… and a shower. He smelled strongly of cologne, probably to cover up the smell of the long train ride back home. You loved his cologne. 
“I’m very happy to see you. I just wish you would have told me you were coming back. I could have planned something!” You threw your hands up dramatically for effect. 
“We can still do something fun; go out to the pub,” he offered. You shook your head in response and he frowned again. 
“I don’t want to go to the pub immediately after getting home from work. Order some delivery while I shower and we can watch a movie or something. I want to relax.” His smile returned and he nodded, quickly taking his phone out to order from his favorite local place. Fifteen minutes later you were dressed in your comfiest pajamas, towel-drying your hair quickly before you made your way back out to the living room. “Do you want anything to drink? I pretty much have the entire pub in my kitchen.” You leaned over the back of the couch, resting your arms on it as you watched him.
He looked up from his phone and nodded. “Please,” he answered simply, “But surprise me.” 
You nodded and wandered back towards the kitchen, slightly distracted by the ad currently playing on your TV. You managed to peel your eyes away as you stepped into the kitchen. You contemplated your liquor cabinet for a moment before you pulled down a bottle of Midleton whiskey, something you always saved for special occasions. Warm light shone through the glass, and you filled it up with maybe a bit more than you should’ve, but you didn’t care. After dropping some ice in, you brought the drinks back to the living room. He took the offered glass silently and you sat next to him, relaxing into the plush cushions. 
You sipped your drink and let your brain go empty, desperately trying to just forget about everything and relax here with your best friend. You couldn’t help but be acutely aware of the warmth radiating off of the man next to you, a direct opposite of the chill your damp hair was sending down your spine. He wordlessly took the remote and switched it from the show to one of his favorite movies, Grand Budapest Hotel. You took a swig of your drink, craving the warmth that was teasing you from your right, and grabbed a blanket that sat on your couch to bundle up in. 
The alcohol seemed to do barely anything to warm the chill in your bones. You were utterly exhausted from work, though, and the alcohol wasn’t helping. You felt yourself dozing off within the first ten minutes of the movie. You were rudely awoken, however, by the sound of the doorbell. Oh, yeah, your food. You mumbled to yourself as you went to get up, but a hand on your leg stopped you. A warmth spread immediately from that spot that rivaled that of the alcohol in your veins.
“I’ve got it.” Andrew stood up and waved at you dismissively to stay sitting as he walked toward the door, stealing your warmth. You craned your neck a bit to watch him, but couldn’t hear their voices over the movie on the TV. You ended up relaxing and stretching out on the couch while you waited for him to return. Not long after, you smelled your food approaching. You hummed happily and sat up once again. “Your favorite.” He set the box down in front of you and opened it up, the smell causing you to practically drool.
“You’re a saint. Thank you,” you smiled up at him and he simply nodded and returned to his spot on the couch. He scooted closer to you as he reached for a slice and you were painfully aware of his knee touching yours. You willed yourself to ignore the thoughts racing through your head as you grabbed a piece for yourself. Your thoughts finally faded to the back of your mind as you ate, more or less watching the TV.
Once you had your fair share of food and liquor you could feel the exhaustion of your workday catching up with you. You pulled your legs up onto the couch and got cozy while the two of you sat in a comfortable silence watching the TV. You started to doze off again and was vaguely aware of the man next to you getting up from the couch. 
Right when you were about to open your eyes to see where he went, though, the couch sunk again and a blanket was placed over you both. One of his arms went around the back of the couch and, totally only because the couch was making you go that way, you found yourself leaning against the tall man with your head on his shoulder. As sleep took over your body now that you were adequately warm, you felt his arm come off the couch and move to around you. With one hand resting on your shoulder, you barely even heard his words. 
“I missed you so much.”
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padfootagain · 4 months
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The Car Trap
Hi!!!!! Here I am again, back to my old antics! Yes, I’m adding one more person to my masterlist. Yes, I am going to hell for this, and you know what? I’ll have such a great time!
Anyway, no one asked for this, except for me, as I was desperate for some Hozier fics, and couldn’t find any new ones anymore! So, here we go! Hope you like this, let me know what you think!
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Pairing: Hozier x reader
Warnings: Angst, fluff, angst to fluff! Friends to lovers, snowed-in… in a car… *hihihihihihhi!!!*
Summary: You're offered a job in Switzerland, and you're ready to accept it. It would offer you a new beginning, a way to forget about the love you have for your best friend. But a trip through a snowstorm with Andrew might change everything...
Word Count: 7282
Hozier’s Masterlist - Main Masterlist
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This trip was a disaster.
A fucking, outrageously terrible disaster…
The weather was terrible, for a start. And that was a statement made with an Irish reference, which was saying a lot. It had been raining so hard you had to stop the car for a while as you could not see the road ahead at all. Then it was time for so much wind that your fingers were cramping over the strength used to hold the wheel. Four hours later, it was getting dark, the sun already setting and the sky heavy with clouds that blocked all sunlight. And it was snowing.
Fucking snowing.
Great. Wonderful. Lovely.
Oh, but if only the problem was held by the capricious weather… no… no, this was but a part of the issue. You could even say that this was the top of the iceberg, just a tiny fraction of the shit you were buried under.
Because your phone had died. But then again, you had no signal anyway to get the help of a friendly and absolutely annoying GPS; and in the passenger seat by your side, your best friend was struggling with a fifteen-year old map that was so out-of-date that it might as well have not existed for the help it got you…
You were lost. You were fucking lost, in the middle of nowhere, while it was getting dark and snowing and there was nothing manmade in sight to ask for help.
Wonderful. Truly, wonderful.
Oh, and that was without mentioning that the best friend in question was also the man you had been in love with for years but had never dared confess your feelings to.
Outrageously bad, that road trip, really…
Andrew picked up his phone to get some more light, his glasses perched haphazardly on his nose as he tried to decipher names printed on the large map splayed across his laps; hair held back in a low bun, allowing you to see his focused features.
“So?”
He merely hummed in response, a long finger following a dark line.
“Do you have any idea where we are?” you insisted.
“None whatsoever,” he shook his head.
He sat back in his seat, before rubbing his eyes.
“I mean… we’ll end up crossing a village at one point if we keep going along this road,” he sighed. “I don’t have a better plan for now.”
“We might have to stop at one point, though. The snow is getting heavy.”
“I had never envisioned dying from the cold in the middle of nowhere on some random Irish road…” Andrew joked, his tone almost contemplative, and you couldn’t refrain a chuckle.
“And with you! Absolutely not. There’s no way I’m dying with you, of all people.”
“Why not? You don’t want to see me dying?”
“I don’t want my last moments to be shared with someone as annoying as you.”
He tried to throw back some witty remark, but his laughter was too much to handle.
He had pushed back the seat as far as possible, of course, in an attempt to accommodate his long limbs, but even in this position, his legs were not fully extended before him, his knees hitting the dashboard at every bump of the road.
You forced your gaze to go back to the road again, squinting your eyes to see through the heavy snow that fell now, instead of lingering on his legs.
God… you were so damn ridiculous…
His quiet rumble of a laugh finally died out, but a smile remained set on his features, even though his tone was serious as he spoke again.
“We can still turn the engines on every once in a while to get some heat.”
“Won’t that drain the battery or something?”
“If we don’t do it too much, it should be fine. Besides, it’s not minus twenty outside, relax. We’ll be fine.”
You merely nodded, falling, as always, for the safety in his quiet voice and the warmth of his tone.
Besides, it was easier to believe in the certainty of his voice, in its soothing sound, than to face the snow falling more and more heavily outside, the night creeping over the distant mountains, right beyond the green fields. Their silhouettes were almost made invisible now by the low light, you could only guess their shadows. Despite the headlights, you could barely make out the stony walls on each side of the road, mostly devoured by ivy and thickets. You had slowed down your pace, driving slowly in fear that a wild animal would suddenly jump in front the car, or that you would miss a random house set by the road.
It was also easier to focus on the silly story he was using to quieten your mind rather than to mention the reason behind this trip across the countryside.
You were leaving.
You were leaving Ireland to settle in Switzerland for a job. Or well, nothing was fixed for now, but you had an amazing opportunity. A first trip to the country to meet your future boss in person was planned for the following week, and at the end of these three days spent in Geneva, you had to sign your contract. You would then have about a month to find a place and move there.
So, you and your best friend had decided to enjoy a little road trip together. Driving all the way to the other side of the country. Staying at an Airbnb near the western coast. Enjoying four days together spent by the sea, the cliffs, and an awful lot of chips and beer.
You had been puzzled by Andrew’s reaction when you told him about your new job. He had seemed… unphased by it.
Of course, with his career, he was often away, and you were used not to live close to each other for long periods of time. Still, you were always one of the first people he visited whenever he was home. And while he stayed in Ireland, you spent most of your time together. As if he wanted to soak in as many moments as he could before he would leave again. And yet, when you told him that you would move to another country, he didn’t even blink. He gave you a smile, congratulated you, offered you a warm hug, and that was it. He asked about the job, about the place where you would live… and that was it. No disappointment in the thought of you leaving. No sadness at the thought of not having you around. No heartbreak whatsoever…
But then again, you were a fool for hoping that he would feel this way. Because he was… Andrew. Absolutely-lovely, amazing-hair, siren-voiced, hilariously-witty, unbearably-gentle Andrew. You had been friendzoned a few weeks after your first encounter, and you had no reason to believe that his feelings had changed. Actually, this new job, you took it as an opportunity to forget him. Move on. And not only because many miles would separate your homes, but because you weren’t leaving on your own.
Another one of your colleagues, Tom, had been approached by the same company as you had. He had already accepted the offer, and he was thrilled when he learned that you were leaving for Geneva as well. You knew he had a crush on you. He was pretty obvious about it. If he had never crossed a line, it was clear that he wanted you to give him a chance. And who knew? Perhaps this new beginning, with another man that you quite frankly found great, could mean you finally moving on from your stupid crush on your best friend. A new start, in another country. After spending a few weeks getting used to this new place, this new corporation, this new workplace… perhaps you would give Tom a chance. You desperately needed to forget Andrew, after all…
Of course, you didn’t know that you were completely, utterly wrong… about everything. That Andrew wanted to cry at the mere thought of you leaving. That he held you too tight and for too long that afternoon when, bathed in the neon light of your kitchen, you told him you were moving so far away from him, because he didn’t want you to see the tears in his eyes. He didn’t have the right to hold you back. He was but a friend to you, and friends needed to be supportive, and this was such a great opportunity for you, and… and he was only your friend.
Only your goddamn friend. As if Andrew hadn’t longed to be much more than that after a mere week spent in your company. But you had met before he would leave, touring for his second album, the timing was all wrong. He couldn’t ask you out for a couple of dates just to get you attached to him, before he would disappear for months on the other side of the planet. That wasn’t fair. He wanted to do things the right way. So, he kept his distance at first, unwilling to get too attached himself. But then, when he came home months later… you weren’t single anymore.
The fool… he had lost his chance. And over the years, the two of you had built such a great friendship that he didn’t want to take the risk anymore. Besides, he was certain that you didn’t see him this way. You had been in relationships, he had been in relationships… you had never showed any sign that would make him feel that he was more than a friend to you. Even when he tried to get you jealous, at the beginning, right after your break-up… but it didn’t work. The lure fell into the water in a deafening defeat, and he had made up both his mind and heart. You weren’t interested. He didn’t blame you. With his chaotic lifestyle.. who in their mind would settle for that?
Did it stop Andrew from still being in love with you, even after all this time? No, of course it did not. And the thought that you wouldn’t be home with him anymore…
He looked away, through the window, just to hide the tears that rose to his eyes all over again. He rested his elbow against the cold window, his lips to the back of his hand, biting lightly in the skin to calm down. He had no right to try to hold you back… no right at all… Was it your fault if he was enough of a fool to fall for his best friend? The cliché was almost too much to bear…
When he turned to you again, though, he couldn’t help the warm, fond feeling that invaded his chest at the sight of you. During the moment of silence you were both bathing into, disturbed solely by the wind and the tires over the frozen road, the night had almost conquered the last remnants of sunlight that lingered there, held against the eastern riff of the mountains. The headlights and the dim lights coming from the headboard were enough for him to see your features, though. They were enough for him to long to brush that strand of hair behind your ear, to lean across the car to kiss your cheek, to feel the warmth of your skin, even if for just a second, against his lips…
God, he didn’t want you to leave. What would he do if you left? When would you see each other? Never… If he spent so much time touring and you weren’t home…
God, he would move to Geneva with you if you asked. Even if it were to keep him as a mere friend, that was how badly he needed you in his life…
“Andy… I’m not sure I should keep driving…”
Andrew shook himself out of his thoughts, forced his attention back to the road ahead. You could barely see the road at all, as it was slowly turning white, just like the patches of grass between the road and the low walls…
Andrew shook his head.
“We can’t just stop in the middle of the road either. Just… drive slowly. Let’s try to find somewhere to park.”
You nodded, frowning in your focus.
You kept on driving for a while longer. The night was stark black when you finally found a small space by the road where you could safely park. There was still no house in sight, though… not that you could have seen anything beyond a five meters radius anyway…
You turned off the engine, let the lights go dark. Andrew turned on the light of his phone again.
“You should save some battery,” you argued.
“Got plenty, don’t worry.”
“So… now, what?”
“Now, we wait.”
“And if it keeps on snowing all night? Should we try to get some sleep?”
He merely nodded, setting his phone between the two of you to shed some light all over the tiny space of your car. Andrew reached behind him to get your coats from the backseat.
“We should put these on while they’re still warm.”
You didn’t complain when Andrew unfolded your warm coat, holding it up so you could easily slip your arms inside; nor did you stop him when he straightened it around your frame, reached for the zipper, and closed it for you.
And perhaps it would have been wiser for you to do so… but then again, you were human.
You were still trying to regulate your heartbeat while Andrew was putting on his own coat.
And for the first half-hour, everything was easy. You turned the engines back on for a few minutes when it got too cold, but in such a weather, you were worried your car wouldn’t start with a low battery. After all, it wasn’t exactly brand new.
“What if we get stuck in here?” you asked, worrying about the snow that didn’t give any sign of stopping.
“We’ll freeze to death, probably. At least the cold will preserve our bodies.”
“Good news for the police officer who’s gonna open the door. The smell won’t be too bad.”
“Exactly.”
“How long do you think before they find us?”
“Oh… at least a few weeks, if it snows enough.”
“Don’t you think anyone would notice a car covered in snow by the side of the road?”
“Not if there’s enough snow on it.”
You were the first to break, unable to be serious any longer. And Andrew’s laugh soon found yours, a deep rumble shaking the air around you.
“We won’t get fully snowed in,” Andrew reassured you as your laughter receded, in favour of the hushed quiet of winter. “Don’t worry. Besides, we’re not going to stay here all night. We’ll just wait until the worst of the storm passes. I can drive the rest of the way, if you want.”
“I can keep driving. I think I’ll try to take a nap while we wait though. I need to focus.”
Andrew merely nodded as an answer, adding a soft humming for good measure, before he would offer you a warm smile. He reached for something in his pocket, and put on a beanie and some gloves.
“I’ll keep an eye out,” he added, shifting to get more comfortable, the seatbelt since long discarded.
You tried to do the same, sliding the seat back to get more room to move around. Your eyes settled on Andrew’s features one more time before they closed.
But there was no way you could fall asleep. Beside your troubled mind, you were getting uncomfortably cold again. Enough for your teeth to chatter for a moment, until you tightly set your jaw.
You felt warm skin brush the back of your freezing fingers, heard the low, unapproving humming that Andrew let out at the touch.
“Take these, Y/N.”
You blinked your eyes open, while Andrew was already pushing a glove into your palm.
“You’ll be cold,” you argued, but you were met with a fond glare.
“You are cold.”
You gave up, took the gloves he offered. So large around your hands, the wool soft and still holding the warmth born from his own skin. You tried to stop him from planting his beanie on your head too, but failed.
“You need to stay warm! You’re a singer! You can’t catch a cold!” you tried to argue, but Andrew was already pulling the wool down to cover your ears.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m just fine. Besides, you’re the one who’s always cold.”
“Am not!”
“Are too! Who wears a woollen scarf in June?”
“It was cold!”
“You could turn into an ice cube if left unattended.”
With a great sense of maturity, you stuck out the tip of your tongue, making him chuckle.
It was better, but you were still cold, and so was Andrew now. He was shaking slightly, rubbing his hands together, burying his mouth and nose in his woollen grey scarf to warm it with his breath. But when he tried to shed some light outside again, the snow was still too heavy to drive safely.
“I can’t feel my fucking toes,” he complained, but there wasn’t much that you could do.
Except that you could. It was stupid, probably ineffective, but you were too cold to think straight.
“What if we hugged?”
Andrew let out a laugh.
“I like the sentiment, but that would hardly warm my toes.”
“Isn’t sharing body warmth a surviving technique?”
“Do I look like I would survive in the wild?”
“No, you would either bump your head in a branch so hard you’d knock yourself out to fall right into an endless pit… or you would be spotted by lions from miles away, you and your long limbs…”
“Exactly.”
There was silence again, for a couple of minutes, and you didn’t dare to break it. Instead, you let your eyelids fall again. He had refused to hold you, it was speaking volumes. What if you had made him uncomfortable? What were you expecting anyway? You were just a friend…
A gentle tug on your sleeve made you look up at him.
“Come here.”
“What?”
“We’re both cold, come here. You’re right, body heat sounds like a good idea.”
You joked in an attempt to hide the way your heart jumped in your chest.
“We both know you simply like to be held. Even by me.”
“Anything if I can avoid losing my toes.”
You wished you could claim that the manoeuvre that led you to lie with Andrew was a graceful one, but it truly wasn’t. After bumping into every surface possible and hitting your head against the ceiling twice, you were, however, finally secured in Andrew’s arms.
You moved around a little, trying to get comfortable, but in the tiny space of the passenger seat, there was nowhere for you to lay but on top of him.
If your nerves were getting the better of you at first, you couldn’t help but unwind as Andrew wrapped his arms around your frame, engulfing you within his embrace, pressing you closer to him, even though it didn’t seem possible.
He closed his eyes as he breathed in the sweet scent of your shampoo, but you didn’t notice. You didn’t notice either the way his heart sped up under his ribs, the way his breath caught in his throat. You never seemed to notice. Andrew reckoned that he was pretty obvious, although he did try to hide it all, but you never noticed anything. He couldn’t hide it, though. Even if this would lead nowhere, even if he didn’t stand a chance, he couldn’t help it. Loving you. In all the years he had known you, he had never been able to help it. Perhaps that was what love was all about. Loving beyond reason. Loving even when he wished he didn’t. Loving, and hurting, and having no regrets about it. Hurting, and being willing to go through all this pain all over again, for just a moment more…
He heaved a sigh without noticing, his eyelids lifting to be faced by a wall of darkness spotted with white snowflakes. He was ridiculous. You were leaving, that was the final proof he needed to be certain that he was nothing but a friend to you. If you felt anything for him, you wouldn’t be leaving… right? He had not left. He could have moved to the US a thousand times over, but you were in Ireland. Of course, you weren’t the only reason for him to stay, but you were easily the most important one, the one that carried the most weight.
What was the point of going home after a tour or a long recording session, if home wasn’t where you were?
Pathetic. That was what he was, pathetic…
Besides, you deserved better than what he could offer. Waiting for him for months on end? A constant back-and-forth between nations, a life stuck in a suitcase? No… no, you deserved better than that. Better than what he could offer you. Better than him…
And you were leaving. Final proof…
He held you tighter, and almost released it all in a breath.
Don’t go. Please, don’t go…
“Andy?”
He merely hummed in response.
“I’m pretty sure this is doing nothing to keep us warm.”
“I think it helps.”
“We’re wearing too many clothes.”
“Are you offering a game of strip-poker or something?”
You didn’t look up at him, face still buried in his shoulder, and yet he knew you were rolling your eyes.
“I must be crushing you.”
“You’re breaking all my bones, indeed.”
You tried to move away, but his hold tightened, and he looked down at you with confusion.
“What are you doing?”
“Saving your life? Avoiding you to be crushed to death?”
“I was joking. I’m alright.”
“Really?”
“Yeah… yeah, that’s… nice.”
You weren’t sure what to make of such comment, so you remained quiet instead, breathing deeply his scent, feeling it numb your senses.
“I’ve never seen such a snowstorm,” he pointed out, gaze lost into the darkness ahead.
“Me neither.”
“Not in this part of the world, at least.”
“Typical of Ireland to send me the storm of the century as a farewell gift.”
You felt Andrew tensing under you, his voice was colder than usual as he spoke, but you weren’t sure what to make of it.
“When will you leave? For good, I mean.”
“I have a month after this short stay to find myself a place to rent and get to work.”
“But you’ll come back to visit, right?”
“Yeah, of course! I mean… when I’m on vacation. To see my family.”
“Will I get some free housing in Geneva, then?”
“You thief, as usual.”
“You know me. Always the rascal.”
You closed your eyes as he started to rub your back, the gesture gentle and amazingly soothing.
“Aren’t you afraid to go there on your own?”
“Yeah… yeah, a little bit,” you admitted in a breath. “But… at least Tom will be there.”
“Tom?”
“Yeah, you know? My colleague? He’s very nice, I like him a lot. We’re leaving together.”
His tall frame tensed again, you caught the way his breath staggered.
“What do you mean Tom is leaving too?”
You stared into his hazel eyes; these eyes you dreamt of at night, the ones you adored. They had taken the hue of leaves before Autumn, deep green in a ray of sunshine. They always did when tears came to his eyes. And indeed, you were surprised as you fell into his gaze to find it blurred with tears.
“You… you’re leaving with him?” he asked, voice deeper than usual, shaky, vulnerable.
You were aware, now more than ever, of how close you were. You stared up at him, lost in his eyes, and you thought of how it would be so easy to lean up and kiss him, make his frown melt away, shush his worry with your lips…
“I thought… why…?”
You shrugged, unsure of what he meant to say.
“We’ve been approached by the same company. We’ll both move to Geneva.”
“Together?!”
“I mean… at the same time, yes.”
“But you’re…”
So that was it then… you had found someone else again. And this time you were leaving in another country with this man and…
And Andrew had lost you for good.
He was only too aware of how close the two of you were, of how easy it would have been to simply lean down to kiss you. Press his lips to yours, forget you were choosing someone else…
But he couldn’t forget. He couldn’t take it.
Instead of leaning closer, he pushed you away.
“Get off.”
You frowned at the roughness in his voice, the coldness in his tone, and Andrew wished he could control himself, be gentle, the way you deserved, but he needed to get away if he wanted to keep breathing…
“Please, get off me.”
You blinked tears away, and he hated himself for being the cause of such a sight, but he didn’t stop you when you ungracefully pushed yourself back into the driver’s seat. And Andrew watched as you stared at him, expectant, like you didn’t understand that you were breaking his heart in a million pieces…
And he couldn’t take it.
You were so surprised when Andrew opened the door and climbed out of the car that you didn’t stop him. He was already out of sight when you shook yourself enough to grab his phone, the only source of light available, and jumped out of the car as well.
The wind was bitterly cold as it assailed your cheeks, the snow rough and sharp digging into your skin.
“ANDREW!”
You hurried around the car, struggling with the slippery ground.
Above the wind, there was nothing to be heard but your own voice. Betrayed by the night, even this sound seemed to fade too fast to reach anything out of your sight. And Andrew was nowhere to be seen, the darkness too thick for that, the elements howling too loudly.
“ANDREW!”
A thud. A groan. A hiss. You followed the sounds in a hurry, and sure enough, mere seconds were needed to find your friend half-lying in the snow, a hand gripping at the low stone wall.
“ANDY!”
You kneeled by his side, uncaring of the sharp sting of the frozen ground under your knees.
“Are you alright?”
But he nodded, without a word. He seemed in pain, you brushed a loose strand of his hair behind his ear, and he leaned into your touch without noticing.
“You’re okay? What the fuck are you doing?!”
“You’re leaving for him, right?”
“What on earth are you talking about?!”
“TOM! FUCKING TOM!”
He moved away from your touch, but winced as he leaned against the wall. Your eyes grew round in worry, and when you turned the light towards the stones, there were traces of blood there.
“Oh God… Andy, you’re hurt!”
“It’s nothing,” he shook his head.
“Let me see…”
But he stood up instead, and you followed close. He was towering you, the way he always did. The difference in height had not been so obvious in the car, but now, he was standing before you in his full, impressive height, and the way he glared made it more intimidating than usual.
“You’re really leaving for a fucking guy you met at work?!”
You frowned, shaking your head.
“Andy, I’m not…”
“Have you lost your fucking mind?!”
“Andy…”
“For how long have you two even been together?”
“We’re not! We’re not together.”
It was his time to frown in confusion.
“What?”
“Tom and I, we’re not together. We’ve been approached by the same company, that’s all. Although, if I’m being honest… I might give him a chance.”
“What?”
You noticed how he was out of breath, of course you did. He didn’t seem angry anymore, just…sad. Unbearably sad…
“Well, he’s nice… and… I know he likes me. But… can we go back to the car now?”
“Don’t go with him.”
You stared up at him, his hair messed by the wind as more strands were breaking free from his bun. Snowflakes stained the dark locks with white. Some got caught in his long eyelashes. The biting cold was turning his sharp cheekbones red. In the dim light, you couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth, even though you could see the lips moving with the vowels, closing with consonants…
“Don’t go. Y/N… don’t go.”
These were words you were longing to hear, and yet, now that he was finally speaking them out loud, you couldn’t take them in.
He had acted like he didn’t care for weeks, and now, all of a sudden, he claimed that he was hurting?
“That’s rich coming from someone who spends barely any time home.”
You knew you were being mean, and you felt guilty as a shock of pain ran through Andrew’s features, enough so to bring tears back in his eyes. Still, you didn’t take your words back.
“That’s not the same. This… this is still my home.”
“This is a great opportunity for my career. This would be a new start. I’m excited about it. And Tom is nice. He likes me. He wants me…”
“You’re saying that like you don’t have a family and friends and people who love you already.”
“You know what I mean. This is a great opportunity, Andy. I want to take it.”
You noticed the way he clenched his jaw, the way the muscle jumped there as he lowered his gaze to the ground, nodding slowly.
“You’re right… that’s a great opportunity. You should take it…”
But instead of you agreeing, he was surprised as you huffed in annoyance, and turned your back to him.
“Get your arse back in the car, come on.”
“Y/N…”
“I don’t understand what you want, Andy!” you hissed as you turned back to him, and he hated the sharpness in your voice, it felt like a knife. “You act like you don’t give two fucks about me leaving for weeks! And now… now you’re acting like you want me to stay…!”
“Of course, I want you to stay! But I’m your friend, I’m supposed to be here for you, and to support you and encourage you…”
“So you’re glad that I’m leaving?” your voice rising into a shout, and his tone matched yours when he answered, making you tremble under his deep, powerful voice.
“Of course not! Are you listening to yourself?! Why would I want you to move to fucking Geneva!”
“Because you didn’t say a thing about it!” you were crying, but you didn’t even notice, too busy letting your feelings out, at long last. “Because everyone else tried to convince me to stay, and you didn’t!”
“I tried to be supportive!”
“Well, I didn’t want you to supportive!”
“What did you want then?!”
“The truth!”
“Well, I don’t want you to leave! Here’s your fucking truth! And I don’t want you to leave with fucking Tom! I want you to choose me!”
He was out of breath now, and as he moved closer to you and the light you still held tightly in your hand, you finally noticed that he was crying as well.
“Choose you?” you asked, confused and slightly calmer, even if your voice kept on shaking. “Why would you want me to choose you…?”
“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!”
The words were out before he could hold them in; failing this time at this game he had played a thousand times before, every time the words almost slipped out, when he bit his tongue until it hurt so you wouldn’t hear his heart. Your eyes grew round like you were surprised, shocked even, like this was not the most obvious truth in the world, like he had not spent years loving you in secret, leaving traces of his bleeding heart all over the place…
He almost wanted to laugh at you, at your round eyes and parted lips and all that snow caught in your hair and the way he longed to kiss that shock off your face. He didn’t though. Because you took a step back, and he read fear in your eyes, and he realised then that you were slipping away, sand between his fingers although he tried to hold tight.
“Y/N…” he breathed, voice taken away by the wind before it could reach you.
You hurried to the car instead of answering, and he followed you this time, shivering in the cold. And once you were back in the safety of your vehicle, the seats had lost their warmth, and the tiny space between the two of you seemed unbearably vast, a chasm you would never be able to close or cross.
You were both staring out by the windshield, while the snow finally receded. You could start driving again…
“Can you say something?”
“We should try to drive again.”
“Y/N… please…”
But as you turned to him, it was to stare at his palm, not his gaze.
“You’re bleeding.”
Andrew followed your gaze, looked down at his own hand. There was a long cut across the palm, red with blood, darkened with dirt on some spots. In the dim light, it was hard to tell how deep the cut was. It hurt, that was for sure. And yet, he didn’t care. You were more painful than an open wound.
“It’s nothing…”
“Let me see.”
You took off the gloves he had lent you, and Andrew didn’t have the strength to stop you as you gently reached for his hand, cradled it in yours, held it to the light to get a better view. Your skin was warm and soft against his cold one, and the thought that you could hate him, that you could resent him for sharing feelings he knew as unrequited made the tenderness of your hold almost unbearable.
“How did you hurt yourself?”
“I slipped in the snow. Caught myself to the wall. Sharp stone.”
You heaved a sigh, the sound was almost annoyed, but not quite. More like… worried.
“Hold the light, would you?”
He didn’t think as he obeyed, yielding to your will, the way he always did. You grabbed a bottle of water and some tissues from the glove box, and started to slowly clean up his cut. You were leaning closer to do so, and Andrew couldn’t help himself as he leaned forward as well, longing for your nearness, basking in the touch of your hand as it came back to cradle his, drawn to you like a moth to a flame.
The breath he let out before speaking again was shaking.
“Do you hate me?”
You looked up, seemed to realize how close the two of you were. You could easily lean up and kiss him, and he could easily lean down and press his lips to yours. Instead, you both remained motionless, perfectly still, merely staring while he waited for an answer you thought was too obvious to be spoken.
“Why would I?” you asked back.
“Because… because we’re friends. And I caught feelings. And… maybe you hate me now that you know that I don’t… I don’t see a friend in you at all. Now that you know that I lied.”
But you didn’t answer, instead, you lowered your gaze again, and Andrew jumped and let out a hiss as you pressed the wet tissues against his broken skin.
“I’m not angry,” you finally reassured him. “I’m just… I don’t really believe you, I think.”
“What? Why wouldn’t you?”
You shrugged, and despite your claim of being calm, the smile that formed on your lips was bitter when you spoke.
“For how long have we been friends? And you’ve never said anything? Never felt anything, until I decided to go away? And now, all of sudden, you’re catching feelings?”
“I’ve never said these feelings were new.”
“You friendzoned me, back in the days. Do you remember that?”
Andrew winced, but nodded anyway.
“This… this was different.”
“Because I was just a friend?”
“Because I was the one leaving. Because it wasn’t fair to ask you out just to disappear for months while I was touring.”
Finally, you looked up again, trying to read something in his eyes, and whatever it was, Andrew hoped that you would find it there. He hoped you could see that he was being earnest, that he meant it, that there was no doubt to have. He had never doubted his love for you, even if he had refrained it. It had been a truth he had relied on for years. With a bit of luck, you might want to rely on it too…
“But then you came back… why didn’t you say anything then?”
“You weren’t single anymore. It was my turn to get friendzoned.”
The ghost of a smile formed on his lips, a soothing offering. But it was sad all the same.
“And after that?”
“After that… you were already my best friend. You… I didn’t want to lose you. And you… you deserved better than that. You deserve better than what I can give you. Waiting around while I disappear for months, what kind of life is that?”
You stopped breathing as he lifted his unharmed hand up to your face, brushing his fingertips across your cheek, the way he had longed to for years.
If his heart was staggering behind his ribs, if his breath was caught in his throat because of this gentle touch of your skin, when he closed his eyes to gather his strength, there was a tear breaking free.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I know you don’t feel the same,” he shook his head as he opened his eyes again, falling into your gaze, and he saw there the same tears he tried to withhold in his own eyes. “I know it’s a one-sided thing. I didn’t… I didn’t want to break everything. I’m sorry.”
He was surprised when you shook your head and leaned into his touch, forcing his hand to open so he could cradle your face in his palm, long fingers disappearing into your hair and tenderly brushing your skin.
“God, you’re such an idiot.”
He raised a surprised eyebrow, not daring to move or reply. You started laughing, and he was at a loss.
“We’re both so damn stupid!”
He had to blink to make sure that he wasn’t imagining your movement as you slowly closed the gap between the two of you, as you leaned up to meet him. He was too surprised by it to meet you halfway; he was too taken aback by the feeling of your lips against his to kiss you back. It took him a couple of seconds to process that this was truly happening, that he was not, in fact, lost in one of the many dreams he’d had of this moment. But then your hand was in the mess of his curls, and you were pressing your lips more firmly against his, and he allowed himself to believe that you wanted this as well, that perhaps he had been, indeed, such an idiot for failing to see what was right in front of him, the same way you had missed all of his gestures along the years.
And you wished you could admit to yourself that you were keeping control over the situation, having instigated the kiss, but you melted into his touch the second Andrew responded and kissed you back. His hold on your face tightened slightly, a tinge of desperation held in the gesture. You tightened your hold on his wounded hand, and he responded by twisting his wrist until he could hold onto your hand too. You chased after him as he pulled away, but he left only for a second, just long enough to tilt his head slightly to the side, bettering the angle of his next kiss so he could deepen it. And the second you could properly taste him on your tongue, you lost track of everything but him: the warmth of his scent, the softness of his touch, the smoothness of his skin, his curls running through your fingers, the gentle scratching of his beard, and the overwhelming feeling of being kissed by him. The feelings he poured into the intimate gesture… no one had ever kissed you like that before…
When you broke apart, at long last, both of you breathless, blinking the dizziness of the kiss away in an attempt to find back an earthly footing, Andrew pressed his forehead to yours, afraid, perhaps, that if he got too far, he would wake.
“I don’t see you as a mere friend either, in case that was still unclear,” you clarified, tone half-joking, making him smile.
“Right…”
“You’re okay?”
“Just… trying to assess whether I’m awake or dreaming right now.”
Playfully, you pinched his shoulder, making both of you laugh.
“Awake,” you confirmed. “Even your wild imagination could not have pictured the storm of the century as a background for our first kiss.”
“First? Can I have another, then?”
You couldn’t refrain a giggle, gently shaking your head at him, brushing your nose against his in the process.
“A true thief, as always.”
“Of the worst kind only.”
His thumb caressed your cheekbone, soft touch across your soft skin, making your eyes flutter shut as your heart lost its rhythm.
“If you want to take this job in Geneva, we can still make it work.”
You lifted your eyelids again and pulled back, just to fall right into his hazel eyes.
“Just… don’t choose Tom…”
You shook your head, giving him a reassuring smile. Your hands moved to hold his face in both of your palms, to make sure he would keep staring at you as you answered.
“Fuck Tom. Fuck Geneva. I’d rather go on a date with you.”
Andrew let out a chuckle, eyes crinkling as he smiled. Still, he had tears in his eyes all over again.
“You said it yourself, though. It’s a great opportunity for you.”
“I want to stay. If we give this a try, I want to stay.”
“Y/N…”
“I’m sure.”
“I’ll be away for months…”
“And you’ll be the one paying for the plane tickets, I’m not emptying my bank account when I’ve got a millionaire as a boyfriend.”
You both laughed, and Andrew nodded, at last.
“Fair enough.”
You were about to speak but didn’t have the time, Andrew was leaning to kiss you again instead, and you couldn’t complain, didn’t want to stop his fall towards your mouth.
He hissed and pulled away too fast though, after mere seconds, looking down at his wounded palm that he had tried to press against your back.
“I should clean this up, and then we can keep on driving,” you proposed, and Andrew agreed with a nod, obediently holding his hand still while you took care of him. He did lean to kiss your forehead a couple of times though, and you were both still quite amazed that he could do it, or that he wanted to.
You would have to get used to it though. After the storm had passed, after you had found your way back onto the right road, after you had reached your destination, there was plenty of time to talk, to confess feelings you had both refrained for too long, for holding onto each other too tightly, for kissing until lips were bruised and numb and yet still willing.
Perhaps, this trip was not such a disaster, after all…
569 notes · View notes
m00nlight-ramblings · 2 months
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hozier brainrot
i've now officially got brainrot for Hozier and wanna write some fics...would anyone read them? PLS LEMME KNOW
64 notes · View notes
bisexual-apocalypse · 25 days
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FUCK IT. YA BOI IS BOUTA WRITE HIS OWN HOZIER FICS (watch this become a Hozier simping page)
43 notes · View notes
arlh0e · 4 months
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Almost (sweet music)
Part: 3/? Rating: Explicit, 18+
Warnings: Hozier x fem!reader, smut, oral fem!receiving, face sitting, PIV sex, no explicit mention of a condom, slightly subby but not completely subby Andrew, yearning, begging, make-up sex, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, ✨eye contact✨,general filth, smut with plot, smut under the cut, fluff, after care
The way Andrew was looking up at you was intoxicating. The look in his eyes was nothing sort of pleading and the way he looked kneeling before you was similar to how one would kneel before an altar to a Devine goddess.
The way he admired you was nothing short of utter worship, like he was in awe of your very presence.
His hands were tight around your waist, wandering a little bit, but staying firmly in a place that you could only describe as utterly respectful, like he was scared to go to far in fear that you would disappear.
He continued kissing the band of exposed skin between your waistband and the hem of your shirt, his eyes never leaving yours for a second. He was wordlessly pleading for your approval in taking this farther.
“Use your words.” It slips out before you can even fully form the thought or process what you’ve just said. Judging by the subtle excitement that touched his gaze though, he approved.
It was an interesting thought, you had never seen the side of him that even slightly hinted to him being into relinquishing control like this. Usually the begging was a job reserved almost exclusively for you. You were unsure of how exactly this would play out.
“Please may I touch you?” His hands tightened around your waist, pulling you a bit closer to him, his kisses lingering a bit longer against your mid drift. “Please.” The look in his eyes made you think he might cry if you said no.
You move one of your hands to the bottom of his chin, picking his head up and leading him back up to his feet in front of you. He towered over you, looking down, his eyes searching for any sign that you were still upset with him or that he was going too far. “You may.” You stand up on your toes to place soft kisses across his jaw line. The satisfied, happy sigh that leaves him pulls at your heart and gives you the confidence to keep going. “Don’t you think you’re getting a bit ahead of yourself though?”
You chuckle against his neck, the breath wafting across his skin makes him tense a little bit, a shiver running down his spine.
You pull away to look up at him expectantly, refusing to make the first move even as your hands make their way to his shirt, gripping it tightly, keeping him impossibly close to you. He leans down, clearly intending to press his lips to yours, but is met with your hand between the two of you, stopping him. “Tsk, tsk, tsk. We ask first.”
“Can I kiss you?” One of his hand makes it’s way too your face and he runs his thumb back and fourth over your cheek. “Please, darling, I’ve missed the feeling of your lips terribly.” His other hand comes to your face as well, holding you in a way that feels so comforting. He’s still pleading with his eyes, they’re so intense looking into yours. His eyebrows are furrowed in desperation and lips are slightly opened, his eyes frantically searching your face, darting back and fourth between your eye a your lips.
In lieu of a verbal response, you nod and pull him closer to you, wrapping your arms around his waist.
He wastes no time pressing his lips to yours, the kiss is soft, full of love, but not lacking urgency. He always kissed you as if he was suffocating and you were his boy source of oxygen left on earth, not only wanting you, but needing you.
Without parting from him, you gently usher him back toward the bed, and only once the back of his knees hit the mattress do you separate your lips from his, gently pushing him down onto the bed.
His smile while looking up at you showed nothing but pure adoration. “You are Devine my love, may I?” His hands were at the hem of your shirt, pulling desperately at the fabric. “I’d like to worship you properly if is all the same to you.”
“Yes, darling, go ahead” you silently thanked yourself for not wearing a bra to bed as he lifted the clothing over your head, revealing your upper half to him. As he looks over your body, he’s grinning like a little kid in a candy store, his mouth practically watering, thinking of all the ways he’d like to devour every inch of you. And you’d like him to. If it were up to you, not a single inch of your body would be untouched by his hands, his mouth, him.
His lips are back on you, exploring your torso, gently nipping at the skin on your stomach, making his way up to the valley between your breasts. Your hands move to tangle into his hair, pulling gently, just enough to elicit a small, sweet sound of satisfaction from between his lips.
His head moves slightly to attend to your left nipple while his hand makes its way over your right.
The feeling of his hands and mouth on you was nothing short blissful. You had always been fully aware of just how generous of a lover Andrew was, always getting pleasure from giving you yours, but this moment took the cake.
You weren’t sure if it was the months apart, waiting for his return, yearning to be in his presence, longing just to be near him, but in this moment, his touch had never felt so good. He was intoxicating, like a drug made specifically with you in mind, sent from whatever gods that were out there with the sole purpose of ruining you.
Before you knew it you were straddling him, his mouth moving on to focus on your neck, your jawline, behind your ears, coaxing sounds from you which, if you were in your right mind, would embarrass you terribly.
He lifts his head to meet his lips to yours again, this time a bit rougher, hungrier. “Please,” another kiss. “Can I,” and another. “I need to taste you.”
He pulls you with him as he lays himself down, your position above him moving farther up, close to his chest now, with his hands on your hips urging you higher.
The thought crosses through your mind that as enjoyable as this idea seems, you may kill him if you try it. “Andrew, I really don’t want you suffocating between my thighs.” You laugh and place a kiss on his forehead. “As tempting as that sounds, I’ve grown rather fond of you.”
“Well in the event that such a thing happens, you can tell everyone that I died doing what I love.” He lets out a breathy laugh, continuing his attempts at pulling you forward. “You know I love nothing more than to please you, wont you please let me do what I love?”
Your hands meet his at your waist to assist in removing the final layers of clothing between the two of you. “Okay, but tap my thighs twice if I kill you alright?” You mutter quietly as you let him guide you until you’re hovering over his face.
He begins his worship at your inner thighs, kissing and nipping and sucking at the soft skin, moving back and fourth between the two of them so as not to give unfair attention or show favoritism between the two.
His breath is hot against your skin, awakening every nerve ending in your body, you swear you could feel his touch through every fiber of your being from the tips of your toes to the ends of the hair on your head. Every touch drew you closer into him, from the work his lips were doing on your thighs to his bruisingly tight grip holding you there.
He lets out a very frustrated sigh. “Darling, please, Im not made of glass.” And you’re suddenly being pulled down onto his face.
The sensation, while familiar is strange (though not unwelcome) considering the change in orientation. His tongue dancing, exploring every crevice of you drove you up the wall. “Fuck, Andrew.”
He made a point out of teasing you every time. He stubbornly refused to give you what he knew you wanted right away, claiming the anticipation is what made everything all that much better when he makes you cum. You couldn’t argue of course, he was right, but it never made it any less frustrating when he teased you the way he did.
Absentmindedly, you begin the rock your hips back and forth over top of him, trying to move yourself to a position to get what you wanted. You weren’t quite expecting the deep groan, guttural, sound that bordered on a feral growl that that came from him as a response to your actions.
The vibrations it sent through your core elicited a similar sound from you, and then a string of moans and curses which you weren’t sure were completely coherent when his tongue moved to where you so desperately wanted his attention.
Your body moved on its own accord. Your hips snapping forward against his face repeatedly, your legs were shaking in a manner that you could only describe as violent.
The waves of pleasure running through you becoming more and more intense with every satisfied hum and groan from him, sending shockwaves through your entire body.
His name was falling off your lips repeatedly alongside every curse your barely functioning brain could think of.
You were positive that he had never been this enthusiastic about giving before, which was saying something, because there truly was nothing he got more excited about than going down on you, but even then he had never gotten this into it.
Before you knew it you were coming undone, squirming desperately against him as he held you there and continued his wicked pursuit of your pleasure, lapping up every ounce of your orgasm that now covered your thighs.
He wasn’t giving you any sort of break to recover, keeping his attention solely focused on the bundle of nerves between your thighs, which was growing increasingly sensitive by the second.
Your vision was blurry and your legs were numb, barely able to hold up your weight. “Andrew, I-” your voice sounded far away, as if it didn’t even belong to you as you reached your second orgasm, less than a minute after your first, and yet he still kept going. “Fuck, too sensitive, Jesus!” You desperately pushed yourself away from him, fighting against his grip on the back of your thighs.
You feel him smirk against you as he releases you to climb off of him. Your head hits the pillow behind you and you let out another breathy moan, riding out the rest of your orgasm with Andrew sitting between your thighs which are still spread open, watching you still shaking and moaning, even twitching occasionally. “You’re so beautiful.” He’s staring in awe at you, baffled by the sight before him. “Can I please keep going? Just one more?” He smiles down at you, his hands rubbing up and down your thighs.
You nod wordlessly. You’re positive that if you tried to speak you’d be completely incoherent. He chuckles quietly. He absolutely loved seeing you this way, your mind completely blank, entirely fucked out and still wanting more of him. You were utterly obsessed with each other, and in this moment nothing could take away from that.
He waits patiently for you to come down, not wanting to completely overwhelm you (that could wait). While he’s waiting, he takes the time to remove his own clothes, which in all the excitement had surprisingly been left completely untouched.
Once you give the okay, he’s back to work between your thighs, this time using not only his mouth but also his fingers.
By this point you were spent. You couldn’t think clearly, you doubted your ability to speak even, you were convinced that this was the most high you had ever been off of him, or anything for that matter.
The feeling of him between your legs was the only thing you could imagine ever thinking about again in that moment. He knew every inch of you like the back of his hand, it was as if he had known you all his life, like you were the only lover he had ever known or would ever know. The only word you would ever be able to describe him with was ecstasy.
The world outside of this room didn’t exist in that moment it was like the stars the moon and all of the planets orbited around the two of you.
You continued letting out moan after broken moan, bordering on screams as his fingers curled inside of you, working together with his tongue to make you cum in record time, it had gotten to the point where the line between pleasure and pain was almost completely blurred and he hadn’t even fucked you yet.
When he removed his head from between your thighs, you found yourself aching for him to come back. The wicked smile across his lips told you that of course he would, and surely enough, before you knew it his lips were back on yours.
You could taste yourself on his lips, slightly salty, but the taste doesn’t completely cover the sweetness in his usual taste.
When he pulls away his eyes are almost entirely dilated and his breathing if heavy. “My god, please let me fuck you, I need you so bad.” His tone is pleading, almost a whimper. You nod quickly, hands moving to his face in an attempt to pull him back to you, desperate for any contact you can get. “I need you so say it. Tell me that I can make love to you. Please.”
“Yes, Andrew, fuck-” you pull his face down to yours and kiss him hard, theres passion and hunger behind it. “I have been waiting for months, missing you for months, please.”
You both moan in unison as he presses into you. You cant help but look into his eyes as he does so, the way he looked at you, marveled at you, worshipped you made you wish this moment would never end. The way your bodies entwine is utterly enchanting, it’s enough to make you forget where your body ends and his begins.
Before Andrew you had never really seen sex as something as intimate as it was with him. Of course exposing yourself to someone and having that vulnerability with another human was always intimate, but never before him did you feel like it was something that inextricably intertwined two people, body, mind and soul.
Sex with Andrew felt akin to pouring your heart out to him and laying the deepest, darkest, most shameful parts of yourself out in front of him without fear of judgement because he would always accept you as you were. Only with him did you finally understand the term “make love”. He loved you unconditionally and you loved him with equal devotion.
You could feel yourself coming to yet another orgasm at the same time that his thrusts started to become sloppy, more rushed, and ever so eager to reach his own high.
It was crazy to you, the way your bodies were always in sync like that. You knew all too well how much of a rarity it was for two people to finish together in most relationships (truth be told, in your experience, it was a rarity to finish at all with anyone else) but it had never once been an issue for the two of you and tonight was no exception.
As that familiar wave of ecstasy washed over both of you, your bodies tensing and then relaxing all in complete synchronization. You swore it was like magic.
You let out a small moan as he pulls away from you, lying down next to you and pulling you into his chest. His scent was so familiar, he smelled like home, like your future, like the two of you sitting on the porch of your home together, old and gray, watching your grandchildren play in the front yard. The thought honestly made you want to cry given the circumstances, but you found yourself just being happy enough to be with him for now. The talk about where the two of you stand could wait until the morning.
“So am I forgiven or am I gonna have to ravish you again in the morning?” He chuckles into your hair, planting a kiss on the top of your head.
“You’re forgiven, but Im open to the idea.” You look up at him, smiling. His gaze was so soft, full of adoration and wonder.
“Great, because I was planning on it either way.” His smile widens and the two of you laugh. You missed this.
Being in his presence was a comfort that you would never take for granted ever again. He instantly put you at ease, made you feel relaxed like you had never felt otherwise.
You found yourself drifting off to sleep, barely still conscious enough to hear him mutter “I love you” as your sleep overcame you.
I got carried away so its a bit long, hope this was as fun to read as it was to write, I’ll hopefully update again tomorrow maybe, but I make no promises
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sunlight-fics · 2 months
Text
Hozier X reader Headcanons
Enjoy (I tried)
* Would most definitely let you play with his hair.
* Would lay on your chest when stressed or sick.
* Hugs from behind and random kiss.
* Most definitely leaves love notes.
* When you’re feeling down or stressed he would softly play his guitar for you or run his fingers through your hair.
* Let’s you rant about anything
* Cuddles up to you on cold nights
* You drag him to run in the rain with you and he loves every minute of it.
* Let’s you sometimes do skincare on him for fun
* Likes baking or cooking dinner with you.
* Goes on nature trails with you all the time.
* Mentions you at concerts (especially when he’s about to play your favorite song)
* Thinks you can be ridiculous at times but still loves you
* WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
* Calls you nicknames he randomly makes up
* Bing-watch’s your favorite shows/movies with you.
* You are most definitely his muse and he wouldn’t have any other way.
* Makes it a point to bring flowers home after every tour.
* Goes to farmers markets with you
* Shares his tea with you and you share your coffee with him
* Dances in the rain or kitchen with you while listening to old love songs
* Kisses any of your scars
Notes: Pt.2? Btw, request are open!!!!!!!
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